#t-ask-masteristics

[taskmasteristics]

i must've missed it, where did greg and alex have the ponytails?? what's the context?

(first gif of this post)

so at first i had no idea what you were referring to with this ask, so i had to go back thru my blog and find them with ponytails

then i couldn't work out which series this would've been from, so i was basically trying to carbon date the gif for which series it would've been from

(glasses on greg means it's series 6 or later, alex has no greys yet so it's nothing past series 9, the camera quality to me looks like maybe series 6/7?)

but ultimately i sadly cannot remember the context of them having ponytails for the life of me - can anyone else help?

[fizzyxcustard]

I have a prompt! How about some Ray Levine? Fluffy comfort fic? Very original, I know 😆

Masterist of fics

Fandom: Stay Close

Summary: You and Ray work together at a local newspaper office. You have both had feelings for each other for quite some time. After a bad day, Ray offers to cheer you up, but those feelings you both share soon become apparent.

Pairings: Ray Levine x Fem!Reader

Warnings: Angst. Mutual pining. Language. Insecurity. Jealousy. Sexual references.

Comments/Notes/Housekeeping: Thank you for reading. As always, if you wish to be added to any of my tag lists, then please let me know. If you like the fic, please consider a reblog. :)

You rested your head in your hands at your desk. The pain in your temples and behind your eyes was intensifying. Another migraine. Truth be told, you hated this job. Your boss, James, was constantly breathing down your neck, and he seemed to have taken a dislike to you. You weren't like most of the other women who worked in the office, full of make up, slim, and dressed as though you had just stepped off a catwalk. To James you weren't a woman he could ogle.

"Are you okay?" a voice came. You looked up to see Simon, one of the other editors. He smiled at you and then placed his hand on your shoulder. For a split second you froze, feeling that sensation of discomfort begin to settle in your stomach.

Ray walked in through the door at the back of the office, his eyes immediately catching sight of you. But seeing Simon at your side made him sigh.

"Hi, Ray," you said cheerfully, looking up at the photographer of the local newspaper. He was gorgeous, but seemed to be oblivious to that fact.

Ray stepped up in front of your desk, glancing icily at Simon. He said your name and smiled.

Simon smirked at Ray, his dark eyes filled with something that you often identified as manipulation and slyness. You looked between the two men, sensing that they hated each other.

"Oh, Ray, I've got that DVD in my car that you asked to borrow," you said, widening your eyes at him, hoping that he would go along with your lie.

"Right, sure."

Simon smiled at you again. "Do you still fancy that drink tomorrow night, sweetheart?"

"Y...yeah, sure," you stuttered, feeling the sweat accumulate in your hairline.

Help me, Ray!

You and Ray walked down the centre of the room, between the two aisles of desks and disappeared out of the door at the end.

"I just needed to get out of that room," you gasped. Cold air immediately hit you as you exited the building. It pressed against your cheeks, cooling them down.

Ray looked at you for a second, noticing your eyes fill with tears. "What's the matter?" he asked.

"I hate this job. Everything about it; the work, the people. James is constantly pressuring me and makes it obvious that he likes all the prettier women over me. You're the only person who doesn't belittle or patronise me." Tears fell down your cheeks.

Ray couldn't help but edge in closer to you. He reached out nervously, his hand cupping your arm. "Do you want to come and spend some time with me after work? I'll cook you some dinner."

You looked up at Ray and smiled, nodding your head. "I'd like that," you replied, adding a chuckle.

After work and you drove to Ray's, feeling so much nervousness and excitement sit in your stomach. You'd had a huge crush on him for months now, ever since he first graced the doorway of the office. He was so much more down to earth than anyone else you worked with, talking with you whenever he came to drop off his SD card of photographs and pick up his payment.

You tapped on his door and waited. A light came on behind the net curtain of the front window. Then the door opened and he appeared. He was dressed in a simple black T-shirt, which showed off the tattoos on his arms. The number of times you had studied his arms and hands, tattooed and full of rings, strong and probably able to please any woman.

Ray smiled at you, catching a faint whiff of your sweet perfume. He immediately felt his heartbeat begin to speed up. He let you into his large, downstairs flat. "Make yourself at home. I've got some Bolognese cooking, and some cheesy garlic bread."

"Sounds perfect," you replied.

You looked around his flat, viewing the photographs on the walls. War zones. Celebrities. Landscapes. All watermarked with Ray Levine in the corner. Then your eyes fell to the leather sofa and armchair. A bookcase filled with photography books, crime novels and poetry books. Poetry? That made you raise an eyebrow. Ray had never really seemed the type of man to like poetry.

"Do you want a drink?" he asked, re-appearing. "Alcoholic or non-alcoholic?"

"I'll go for non-alcoholic for now as I'm driving. Can I have a coffee with one sugar and milk?"

"Yep. Back in a tick."

A few minutes later and Ray came back with the drinks and placed them down on the coffee table, which was situated in front of the long, leather sofa. The two of you sat side by side, a few inches apart. So close, yet still so far.

"I didn't know you and Simon were a thing?" Ray asked.

The comment caught you off guard.

"Oh, no. Definitely not. Why do you think that?" you asked.

"He said about taking you for a drink, so I assumed..."

Your cheeks flashed red and you looked away, your heart thundering. "I....can't stand the man. He scares me."

Ray caught your gaze and kept it locked for a few seconds. "Why have you agreed to go for drinks with him then? Love, you have every right to say no. Don't let the creep back you into a corner."

The tears began to well again. It reminded you of how much you liked Ray, and in your mind knew he would never want anything more than friendship. Simon was a last resort. Maybe a way to try and show Ray that you didn't like him...even though you did. It all felt like being back in high school, trying to show your crush that you didn't like them.

Ray reached out and gently took you into his arms.

You closed your eyes as you entered into the warmth. It was the most comfortable you had felt in months, suspended in kindness. His arms were right around you, and suddenly you felt him kiss your cheek.

"I'm sorry," he whispered, pulling away. "I shouldn't have..."

You looked at Ray and whispered his name as his eyes kept darting away, trying to focus on anything but you. Finally, his eyes met yours. "It's okay," you told him. "If you wanted to kiss my cheek then I don't mind at all...it's something different if you didn't want to."

"Of course I wanted to," he replied.

His answer was eager, and you saw light flicker in his eyes. Or were you maybe looking for something that wasn't there?

"Shall we go and eat?" he asked.

The two of you ate your food, but every now and again, your eyes would meet. You could sense sadness in Ray, and by the time you had finished your meal, he disappeared into the kitchen to clear the plates away.

Ray stood at the sink and looked out into the darkness behind the window. He knew he'd been stupid by kissing your cheek, allowing you to catch a very slight glimpse of the fact that he had feelings for you.

"Ray? What's wrong?" you asked. You stood behind him in the kitchen, feeling that tension between you both having grown so absurdly large. "Is this to do with you kissing me in the living room?"

He turned around and looked at you, his face full of sadness. "I've never been any good at this. Fuck!"

"Maybe I should go? I'm sorry."

"Please don't. It's me. I make everything worse than it is. I want you to stay."

You looked down at your feet and felt heat humming through your body. You wanted Ray, in every way that a woman could want a man. Maybe by you saying something then it would give him confidence. However, that constant fear of rejection reared its ugly head. You knew that you needed to shove it away and deal with the consequences later.

"When you kissed me on the cheek, Ray, it...it was something I've wanted for so long. Only I've wanted it to be my lips you're kissing. The truth is, I like you. I really like you. I'm sorry if you got the wrong idea about me and Simon, not that I'm assuming you like me back..."

Ray's face had lit up, his eyes bright and a grin highlighting just how gorgeous he was. "Do you really mean that?" he asked.

"Yeah," you replied. The look on his face was showing you that all of your feelings for this man were requited. You could see a weight had been lifted from his shoulders.

Ray stepped close to you and wound his arms around your waist. You placed your hand against his chest, feeling tight muscles beneath the fabric of his T-shirt. He then closed that space between you and took your lips against his.

You closed your eyes upon the impact and let his tongue delve into your mouth. As you kissed, you heard him groan, and then his lips began to wander down your neck. His stubble tickled your neck and you couldn't help but exhale loudly, the breath becoming caught up with a whisper of his name.

The two of you ventured back into the living room and fell to the sofa, still clinging to each other. Your lips explored each other thoroughly, and you smiled into the air as Ray's lips moved down your body, inching down over your stomach. His hands began unbuttoning your jeans, taking them down slowly.

***

The next morning and you stepped out of Ray's car as he parked up in the car park of the newspaper office.

Nosey pairs of eyes watched the spectacle of you and Ray showing off your newfound relationship in public. One pair of eyes, belonging to Simon, glared angrily.

You and Ray walked past Simon who was still staring at you both. Ray had his arm around your waist.

"Oh, Simon," you said, with a smile. "I can't make that drink tonight."

***

Follow Forever: @i-did-not-mean-to @lathalea @xxbyimm @guardianofrivendell @middleearthpixie @knittastically @meganlpie @luna-xial @linasofia @eunoiaastralwings @rachel1959 @msjava1972 @sunflwrnsunnieshine @tschrist1 @quiall321 @enchantzz

[hauntedwitch04]

hi! for angsty sunday can i request a sebastian stan blurb with #11 and #17? 🤍

Author's note: Hi love! For this blurb I decided to do a Sebastian Stan x daughter!reader, hope you don't mind. Hope you like it. Have a great day!

P.s. the daughter is around 15-17 years old

Themed masterist I Themed Days I Join Taglist I Angsty Sunday 

"Please hold me."

"It's alright. I'm right here!"

I look at the homework in front of me and sigh. I can't take it anymore, I'm tired, but at the same time the fear of failing and disappointing everyone drives me to continue the project I'm doing. My exhausted eyes struggle to stay open due to the late hour, but I force myself to keep going. I feel the tears coming on because of the tiredness, the stress and the fear of disappointing those around me. Ever since I was little, I've always wanted to prove to my father that I was good, and that he could be proud of me. Not that he wasn't or that he didn't love me, on the contrary, he was the first to tell me not to overload me with work, but I always had this need to show him since he is a famous actor and I didn't just want to be recognized for being his daughter.

I don't notice the presence of someone behind me until I feel a hand resting on my shoulder. I turn around and see him, sleepy, looking at me with concern.

"Hey honey what are you still doing up, you should have been in bed for a while." I look at him and I don't know why but I burst into tears.

"It's alright. I'm right here. Don't worry darling."

He says hugging me. I let myself go into a liberating cry. Once I manage to calm down, my dad goes into papa bear mode. "Are you okay? What's going on love? You can tell me anything, you know that right?"

"I don't know daddy, I just felt the need to cry. I feel tired, stressed and on the verge of a nervous breakdown every second of the day, but at the same time I can't even relax for a moment because of my anxiety. It's all so...complicated!" He looks at me and gives me a sad smile.

"I know honey, I understand. It's important to always do things the best you can, but health is also important. You don't have to be sick to achieve perfection, it's not worth it, believe me. Now let's go to bed." He helps me up and leads me to my room. After he settles me under the covers, like when I was a little girl, he makes to go back to his room, but I stop him first.

"Please dad, can you hold me?" I ask him, with my usual soft eyes that he can't say no to. He chuckles and nods before lying down next to me. I fall asleep contentedly in my father's arms, forgetting all my problems.

Taglist

• @rayi_isthehoe

• @shadowolf993

• @goldenharrysworld

• @xoxoloverb

• @s-we-e-t-t-ea

• @lonesomewitchking

[key201303]

Pairing: undercover!Hwiyoung x fem!reader ft. Sf9 members as mafia members

Word count: 1630 words

Warnings: mentions of death, guns, smut, suggestive content, mentions of blood, mentions of violence, mentions of fight, brief mentions of death threat

Genre: Mafia AU, angst, fluff from time to time, smut/suggestive content

Plot: being the daughter of a dealer wasn't easy, especially when he had so many debts and was now dead. Ever since your dad passed away, you've been paying his debts with your own life and body but fortunately that is about to change when a charming boy appears out of the blue to save you. But, is he going to give you a better life or you're just changing the location of your doom? Is he trying to protect you from others or does he also want to use you like an exchange currency like everyone else did?

A/N: You guys have been waiting for this 👀 Hope you enjoy it!! ❤❤

Taglist -> @staysstrays @grungiejaems @io-is-lame @ailoveyuta @jaysbestie @mayfifolle @slut-for-fandoms @forevrglow (ask me to be added!)

Unable to tag -> @i-sa-bella @user127dream

Previous chapter - - - Masterist - - - Next chapter

The soft sunlight was finally peeking through the expensive curtains of the little room you have been sharing with Rowoon ever since you arrived. You have been awake for quite long now, but your eyelids felt way too heavy to open and your body felt too numb to get out of the bed and start another day in hell. But unfortunately, you knew you had to get out of bed at some point of the day, not wanting Rowoon to come into the room and wake you up by himself. You had enough last night to deal with him once again as soon as you opened your eyes.

After a few more minutes of debating with yourself the pros and cons about getting out of bed and out of the room, you slowly opened your eyes, and once they were adjusted to the dim light that was coming into the room through the huge window, you sat up still processing all the information of the morning spurs. You could hear a few birds chirping on the back yard of the house, a few soft cracking sounds coming from the trees because of the soft summer breeze softly moving the leaves and branches, Rowoon and Jaeyoon’s voice rumbled all over the house but you were too tired to actually pay attention to what they were saying. Little by little, your eyes started to land on the small mirror placed next to the bed, the same mirror you used last night to get ready for that party and the same mirror you used to remove the tears that streamed down your cheeks last night as well. You were scared of seeing your reflection in it, not wanting to see your red and puffy eyes and the red mark Rowoon had probably left on your left cheek.

FLASHBACK

“You haven’t shut your mouth the entire night with those men and now you don’t speak to me?” Rowoon said, a slight tint of anger reflected on his voice. You knew you had gotten on his nerves with your actions tonight. You knew he hated so damn much that you spent the entire time with Youngbin and his boys. But, who was he to get mad at you for that? He was acting like one of those jealous boyfriends that have seen their girlfriend chatting with other boys. The only difference was that he was absolutely no one for you. “Quit it. I just chatted with them because you were busy talking with others.” You dared to answer. Little by little, the bratty side you knew he hated so much started to come out as he started to nag about the whole situation. You have tolerated enough until now but you were not going to deal with him treating you like you were his little toy and only his when he was nothing but the one responsible for your father’s death. “You’re nothing to me! Why are you acting like this?” You shouted. Those words were the only thing he needed to explode into anger. “Keep your manners sweetheart. I’m a lot for you. Do I have to remind t¡you that thanks to me your little heart is still pumping blood? Be careful with what you say.” Rowoon said, grabbing your hair to pull you close to him and to make you look at him right into his eyes, trying to make you feel intimidated. “I’d rather be dead than here with you for the rest of my life.” You said, spitting on his expensive suit right after. If he hasn’t had enough with your bratty comments to burst into rage, your little action of spitting on his perfect clothes was the last thing he needed. Suddenly you felt his hand slapping your left cheek. You didn’t see it coming, everything happened so fast that you were left there speechless, with nothing else to say and holding back the tears full of frustration. “Say it again and I won’t hesitate to tell Jaeyoon to shoot your head the same way he did with your daddy.” Rowoon said before walking away, leaving you alone in the room.

END OF FLASHBACK

You could feel a few tears dropping into your hands at the thought of what happened yesterday. ‘What am I supposed to do now?’ You quietly asked, hoping your mom or dad had the perfect answer to solve all your problems but obviously you couldn’t get any divine answer. Your hand moved to softly caress your left cheek that still felt numb because of the slap you received last night. ‘I swear I’ll kill that asshole as soon as I find a way out of this place.’ You promised, full of determination before going out of the room.

You slowly walk into the living room where Rowoon was. You heard Jaeyoon going out of the house a few minutes ago, making you tremble a little bit at the thought of what Rowoon was capable of doing today after what happened last night. But to your surprise, he didn’t speak to you, he didn’t even look at you. Not like you were going to complain though. You walked into the kitchen, acting like you were about to eat breakfast even though you had lost all your appetite. But the noise of the doorbell made you stop your motions, asking yourself who would come to visit Rowoon today. You expected him to not open the door like he always did when he wasn’t waiting for visits but to your surprise, he opened the door to reveal a boy you couldn't recognize.

He was a bit shorter than Rowoon, his curly and long hair was lazily falling right above his dark eyes giving him an interesting look. His leather black jacket reminded you of those American movies of bad boys which made you think he was part of Rowoon’s crew. “Come in, make yourself at home.” Rowoon said with a smile plastered on his face. You thought the boy was part of his crew but the smile he gave to the boy was the same false smile he gave to Youngbin and his friends last night. Then, if the boy wasn’t part of Rowoon’s crew and he wasn’t part of Youngbin’s group either because you didn’t know him, who was he? “She’s in the kitchen, I’m really happy you offered to take her with you and that we could come to a coherent deal.” Rowoon said as they both walked towards the couch. What the hell was he talking about? Did he really sell you like a toy?

“Oh, (Y/N), you’re finally here. Come over here, I want to introduce you to someone.” Rowoon said when you finally walked into the living room. “This is Youngkyun, he’ll take care of you from now on.” Rowoon added, finally revealing the identity of the boy. You looked at the boy with the word 'confusion' written all over your face. Rowoon slapped you last night for chatting with others and now he’s selling you? Did any of this situation make sense to anybody? You couldn’t understand anything and, at first, you really thought he was playing a prank on you or something like that but the moment he told you to pack up your things and go with the boy named Youngkyun you knew he wasn’t kidding at all.

You did as he demanded and went to the room to pack all the stuff you could get before you went to that house. You were happy but scared at the same time. Happy for finally leaving that hell but scared of that boy being worse than Rowoon. You couldn’t tell if you were actually leaving hell or moving the location of your doom but, what could you do about it? Right now, the only thing you could do was believing that boy was actually someone good and that you were actually escaping hell. Maybe it was the desperation of running away or the sincere smile the boy had when he entered the house but you started to think that boy was the answer your mom or dad sent to save you.

“Keep me informed and remember, the ring is the priority. Once you give me the ring, I’ll pay you what we agreed.” You heard Rowoon saying to the boy right before you entered the living room with your bag, ready to leave the house. “You have what you wanted sweetheart, I’m not that bad after all.” Rowoon said when his eyes landed on you, a proud smile spreading on his lips. You just nodded and walked out of the house. After hearing those words he was telling Youngkyun, you couldn’t believe him at all.

You got in the car after placing your bag on the trunk while Youngkyun walked towards the car to start the journey of your new life with him. “Here, you’ll need this from now on.” Youngkyun said, handing you a new phone. You were a bit hesitant about taking it, not understanding a single thing he was doing or saying. “Look, I know what you’ve gone through. I just want to help you.” He said, sincere gleaming in his dark eyes. You slowly took the phone from his hand, unable to remove your eyes from his. “Who are you?” You quietly said, like if someone was hearing you. “I see Rowoon was right when he said you can read people pretty well.” He said, letting out a soft giggle. “I’m Hwiyoung, that’s all I can say for now. But I promise I won’t hurt you, I just want to help you out.” He added, giving you a soft smile and starting the engine of the car to drive off to your new life.

[thejokersenigma]

Joker x Reader - Deadly Voice Part 45

Hi guys, next bits ready-ish.

Hope you guys enjoy it, I might be a bit busy this week so the next part might be bit delayed, I'll see how I do! :)

Enjoy!

As always -  I'll happily take any requests you want me to give a go. Also if you'd rather read this on something other than tumblr I am on Fanfiction.net, Wattpad and AO3 under a similar username :)

Also if you want to be tagged, just let me know! :)

MASTERIST

 I didn’t see the Joker for the rest of the day. I spent the rest of the afternoon and evening hiding amongst the other rooms in the house, occasionally sneaking into the kitchen for snacks, but generally gravitating to the smaller front room with the piano. I ensured the door was closed and, once I had made a trip to the library – I had a small collection of books to amuse myself with.

Eventually it reached the point that my eyes blurred too much from reading the small text and I gave up for the night, placing my books to the side for tomorrow when I would no doubt return and continue.

I headed straight up the stairs, debating with myself what I should do. Did I return to the Joker’s room? Did I find a new room to sleep in tonight? Either as I considered that though, a new wave of exhaustion washed over me as I climbed the staircase and I doubted I would get away with and I was far too tired to want to put up much of a fight to whoever came to find me.

So, I returned to the Joker’s room, my feet dragging along the carpeted corridor – except from outside the Joker’s office which I made sure to hurry past. I wasn’t sure why – maybe I was worried he’d catch me out there, or maybe I was worried I hear my voice again.

I reached the bedroom door without incident and I stepped into the room, closing the dark heavy door behind me firmly. It was only as I turned to face the rest of the room again that I realised there was a chance I wasn’t alone in here. A quick scan of the room showed no one, but I still snuck quietly around the rest of the room, checking the smaller roads that led off. Only when I confirmed these to be clear, could I then allow myself to relax a little.

I headed back to the walk-in closet, this time clocking the fact that the heap of clothes I had left earlier that day was missing. I dug back through the cupboards, searching for the Joker’s shirt and sweatpants – assuming someone had tidied up after me – but they had vanished completely from the room.

“Fine,” I muttered under my breath, “I’ll just sleep in what I’m wearing.” I huffed in annoyance and left the closet, refusing to give into the frilly small pieces of fabric that still sat in my side of the wardrobe.

Once using the bathroom and ready to turn in, I headed to the large 4 poster bed. I stood at the side of it, eyeing up the large, heavy queen-sized duvet. The bed almost looked intimidating to me and it was weird to think I was going to willingly climb into the Joker’s bed – everything about my situation right now told me not to do it, but I felt I had no other option right now – the Joker had made that clear to me and Frost had confirmed it when he seemed to think I had narrowly missed a far worse consequence last time.

Besides, the pillows did look comfy.

I pulled back the duvet partially - ready to climb into the tall bed – when I discovered a small pile of clothes in front of me on top of the sheet. I frown in confusion, reaching for the piece of clothing on the top, unfolding it and holding it up in front of me. My heart jumped a bit when I realised it was the ARKHAM sweatpants I had borrowed last night, and, yes, now I looked down at the neatly folding shirt left on the bed – that was the same shirt I had worn last night.

My eyes widen in surprise and a I felt a small smile rise on my face. I quickly caught it, stamping it down. Shit. At least the Joker wasn’t here to see it – who knew that him just letting me wear the clothes I’d stolen would make me that happy.

Stupid. I cursed before grabbing the clothes and changing into them – relishing in the bagginess compared to the skinny jeans and tight-fitting T-shirt I had been wearing.

I climbed into the bed, relaxing onto the cushiony pillow and thick spongy mattress. I revelled the luxurious softness around me as I lay there, staring up at the dark canopy above. My mind wide awake.

The Joker sat at his desk reading and rereading the same blue print, his mind unable to concentrate - the voices unusually loud in his head.

He grabbed at his head, curling his fingers into claws into his hair, growling angrily. “Shut up!” He snarled, pulling at the green strands, not caring or noticing the pain in his scalp. The voices didn’t listen though, if anything they increased through his frustration.

He clenched him jaw, his teeth protesting under the force. They had seemed louder all day since the silence of last night. It made it impossible to think straight – not that he usually did - but to plan a heist needed some clear thoughts. He blamed [Y/N]. She had taken away his blissful ignorance. She had quietened them for a small moment, just long enough to show him what it could be like and now they were back – louder than ever. It was torturous.

Speaking of [Y/N].

Her voice was echoing around his large office along with the keys of the old piano, as he replayed the CCTV camera footage from the front room earlier this afternoon. The Joker pressed a button on the keypad on his right and one of the many screens in front of him flickered, the music cutting out and now there was a different camera footage of a different room of the house, the icon blinking in the upper right-hand corner showing it was live.

It was his room.

He had heard her pass his office as she had headed up the stairs and along the corridor – her light footsteps completely different to the thudding of the henchman that he usually heard outside his door. He watched as she entered into the room from the bottom of the screen, moving slowly around the room and obviously suspicious, before she disappeared back into the walk-in closet. He smirked to himself – he liked how he made her so uncomfortable and nervy.

He waited for her to return - his eyes not leaving the black and white screen – and a few moments later she did. He wasn’t surprised to see that she hadn’t got changed – the girl was stubborn if nothing else. He watched her walk across the room, never breaking his gaze from the moving image.

She paused at the bed, hesitating before pulling back the cover and then pausing again. The distance of the camera meant he couldn’t see clearly what the black smudge on the bed was, but the Joker knew. Per his orders, the staff of the house had tidied up the clothes left in the closet and had laid out [Y/N]’s makeshift ‘pyjamas’ on the bed for the evening.

The Joker couldn’t be sure, but he thought the pixels of [Y/N]’s face had formed a brief smile.

I tried to sleep for hours.

I finally managed to drift off to sleep for a few moments, before I awoke once more. I looked at the time and groaned in annoyance when I found I had been asleep for no more than 20 minutes. I turned over for the billionth time, groaning again into the pillow.

I wished this night was over. I was sick of lying in this bed and not getting any sleep when I felt so exhausted, yet my mind would not silence long enough for me to sleep.

After a while of lying face down in the pillow I found my breathing becoming restricted so I turned my head, lying so I stared wake awake at the empty pillow across from me.

Where was the Joker? – Not that I wanted him here – But it must be at least 2am by now – was he sleeping somewhere else? Or was he just not going to sleep at all?

I remembered the tired look in his eyes that I had noticed earlier, the dark shadows that framed his cheeks. That man needed some sleep – maybe then he’d had fewer mood swings all the time.

Before I knew what I was doing, I was climbing out of bed and making my way to the bedroom door, swinging it open and striding out into the hallway. Without much of a falter, I took the right direction down the dark corridors and began to head to the staircase.

Now would be a good time for common sense to break through and for me to actually stop and think what I was doing.

But I didn’t.

I just continued on my path, pushing any thoughts, apart from the direction I was heading in, out of my mind.

That was, until I bumped into a solid post.

“Ah!” I cried as I stumbled backwards. I probably would have overbalanced and fallen over my own feet as well if it wasn’t for the fact that a strong hand reach out and grabbed one of my arms. I was yanked back upright – none too softly – and I toppled forward instead, colliding once more with the hard post in front of me.

I flung my arms out to save myself and ended up wrapping them around the pillar – only to find it wasn’t a pillar or a post.

It was a man’s body.

I abruptly pushed myself off the poor man I had just assaulted, mumbling a quick apology. Somewhere in the dark corridor a light was hit and a dim light came on over our heads – though even this was blinding to my eyes for a few moments. I squinted at the man in front of me and, even though my vision was still not quite clear, the green hair and pale skin could only belong to one person.

I had just collided into the Joker.

“Where do you think you’re going, doll?” He asked smoothly, but his voice held a warning in it and he hadn’t released my arm.

“Um – uh – I - .” I stuttered, the surprise encounter making me lose my chain of thought.

“Spit it out doll.” He pressed, irked by inability to speak coherently and he pulled my arm impatiently.

“Well you see, Mr Joker, I –“ I began, my exhausted mind finding an explanation that didn’t sound ridiculous difficult and deciding being cringingly polite was the right way to go about this.

“J.” He corrected.

I frowned up at him, “What?” I asked crudely.

“Call me J, doll.” He clarified, “None of that formalness.” He brushed away my previous remark.

“Ok – well, ‘J’” I started again, “I couldn’t sleep and I –“

“Thought you’d take a moonlit stroll, doll?” He asked snidely.

“No, I –“

“Thought you’d go sightseeing?” He interrupted again. “Secret admirer waiting for you?” He kept pressing, each question more sounding more scathing then the last.

“No.” I snarled, “I thought I’d see if you were going to sleep at all tonight!” I cried out, angrily, annoyed at his sardonic attitude when I was just trying to be nice to my host. “But I can see you’re just going to snarky and rude – so goodnight!” I snapped and spun back the way I had come, snatching my arm free from his hand.

There was pause for a beat as I headed off down the corridor, back the way I had come, before my upper arm was grabbed from behind, “Aww, but doll.” The Joker protested as he pulled me to a stop. I refused to turn around, so he stepped around me till I was forced to face him. I dropped my gaze, even though I couldn’t actually see his face very well now, having left the light behind us in the few strides I had taken. “My snarkiness is only redeeming quality.” He explained teasingly to the top of my head, until he gripped my chin, pulling it up, “Don’t make me get rid of that!” He cried dramatically, but I refused to be placated, keeping my frown in place.

I wrenched my chin from his grip and went to push by him. But he caught me as I moved past, winding his arm around my waist and holding me in place whilst he stepped behind me and held me against his chest.

“I’ll make you a deal, I’ll go to bed, if you go to bed, what da’ya say?” He breathed into my ear, his voice suddenly laced in a seductive tone. His warm breath in my ear and the promises in his voice made me weak and giddy, though I knew it was all wrong.

“I’d say why does everything have to be a deal with you?” I asked shakily, trying to sound strong - though I was anything but that right now – and trying to inch my body away from his own, worried it would betray me.

“Because then I know you’ll uphold your end of the bargain, doll.” He purred, running his free hand down the side of my body, keeping his face close to my ear and pulling me tighter against his chest as he felt my resistance.

“Fine.” I said quickly – anything to get out of this situation right now – and pulling against him again. This time he let me go, staying in place whilst I stepped ahead, turning back to him. “I’m going to bed.” I told him firmly and hurried off down the corridor, practically fleeing and half hoping he wouldn’t follow me.

Why couldn’t I have just stayed in bed? Now I didn’t know what was going to happen but I was pretty sure I had just convinced an insane murdering lunatic to come and sleep in bed next to me.

I was messed up.

I found the room quickly, closing the door behind me – as though, somehow, that would be a deterrent to him – and climbed into bed in the dark. I pulled the covers over me and curled into a tight ball - pretending to be asleep, or at least close to asleep – praying for the slimmest hope that the Joker might just leave me in peace then.

I heard movement down the corridor outside the room and my heart raced. Then the door opened, the bottom scraping along the thick carpet, and then it closed with a frim thud. I screwed my eyes closed tightly but I couldn’t help my ears focusing on every little noise, the tread of footsteps on the carpet, the sound of the tap turning on in the bathroom.

Finally, after many tortuous moments that seemed to take far too long, the bed sunk behind me and I felt a body lie next to mine. I tried to keep my breath even and slow like I was sleeping and I thought I was safe when nothing happened for a few moments.

I jumped, however, when I felt something brush my back and then familiar arms snuck around me, pulling me back against the same hard chest as earlier.

“Why so tense, doll?” J breathed into my hair, making a shiver shoot down my back. I could feel every muscle was wound ridiculously tight, unsure what was happening or would happen next. “Relax.” He breathed again next to my ear. I needed to get his hands off my body. This was wrong. This was why I hadn’t wanted to sleep in this room in the first place.

But I didn’t do anything. It was like I was frozen in place, waiting for something to trigger me into action.

“Speaking of deals…” He purred, referring back to our conversation a few moments ago, “I know a sure way to put a smile on your face…” He purred suggestively, pulling me closer and running his left hand down my body.

I could feel myself trembling under his touch, “No.” I said firmly, trying to pull away as much as I could, but slightly afraid to as well - not sure what he would do at my refusal, this was a crazed murderer after all. His hand froze on my hip at my reaction and I was worried what he was about to do, but then he withdrew it slowly, as though not to spook me.

“Doll?” He asked, but I didn’t move for a few moments, I couldn’t hear any anger or danger in his voice, but I was still afraid in case I set him off. “Doll?” He asked again, moving to grab me, but I shuffled away from him slightly before I then sat up, looking down at my lap. I took a breath and collected all the courage I had left.

I turned to him with confidence I didn’t feel, a professional air about me as though we were in one of his meetings, not both in bed together. “How about we make another deal.” I proposed. He watched me in the darkness, “You accused me that declining your offers out was cheating, right?” I asked quickly before he could interrupt me, the darkness hiding his face which helped my confidence a bit. I thought I saw him nod, “Well,” I continued, “I won’t cheat by refusing to do things, if you don’t cheat by making sexual advances on me, deal?” I asked hurriedly and I wondered if he actually understood a word I had so, or if I had spoken too fast.

He seemed to regard this in silence for a few moments and I was petrified he’d say no – I didn’t have any other ideas to get out of this situation I had made. “You drive a hard bargain, kitten.” He drawled, as though still thinking about his options, “Deal.” He finally declared, his voice not giving away any emotion.

In the dark I felt him shift on the bed so he no longer faced me, I lay back down, staring up at the darkness once more.

“Um – J.” I asked into the darkness.

“What doll?” He asked, sounding a bit irked and a bit tired.

I hesitated a moment, worried it was a stupid question and he’d just get angry – but I wanted to know, “Why are you still in your clothes?” I had felt the buckle of his belt on my back and his shirt on my skin when he held me.

“I sleep in the nude.” He told me, “Didn’t think you’d appreciate that, kitten."

“Uh – no.” I stuttered in surprise. “T-thanks.” I could feel my cheeks burning and I was glad for the darkness and his back being turned. None the less I swear I heard him chuckle at me.

 tags: @6fish6 @carouselcurls @theartistdetective @viraldragonrider @white-chocolate-mocha-fan @toxic-ink

[taskmasteristics]

I have jumped on the friendship bracelet bandwagon and want to make some taskmaster inspired ones…any suggestions for what they should say?? Xx cheers x ✨🥂💕

oh i love this idea! i've personally never made a friendship bracelet so i'm not too sure how it works but if you want short & iconic phrases that (i think) would work well on a bracelet, can i suggest:

tree wizard

left banana

melon buffet

dignity intact!

fiddly

also for longer phrases that can be made acronyms

PDTIAFM (joe wilkinson's "please don't take it away from me")

IGNSO (kiell smith-bynoe's "i've got no shoes on!")

BCI (paul chowdry's "bastards crying innit", tho this one could also work as a full bracelet maybe? let me know)

ITABOIIABR (james acaster's "is that a boulder? or is it a big rock?")

PHEIREI (greg davies' "powerful homo-eroticism, i really enjoyed it")

OJOTBYP (james acaster's "oh, just open the box you pussy")

ATIIOTT (all the information is on the task)

YTSN (your time starts now)

i'm gonna have to call help from everybody else here on tumblr to also suggest things cos there's so much to choose from

[taskmasteristics]

Hello! How about 🕴🏼and 🧑‍🎤 for the taskmaster ask game, please? Thank you!

hi there!

🕴🏼- your team has to deal with Qrs - what service-type job are you going to be weirdly good at?

hmm... maybe making the food? i'm not a bad cook, so that would probably be the thing i'm most comfortable doing. either that or i'd be like lucy, parading around the hotel playing the french horn

🧑‍🎤- if you were on taskmaster, which previous contestant's outfit would you choose to wear when doing the tasks?

definitely john robins' freddie mercury outfit. but maybe a cheaper version

taskmaster ask game

[taskmasteristics]

🎼- taskmaster: the musical episode. yes or no? hard yes or horrific no?

for me it’s a hard no, both to watch as a spectator but also if i had to be a contestant myself. my least favourite tasks are the music based ones unfortunately😅

taskmaster ask game

[taskmasteristics]

💌 ?

💌- how likely would you be to argue back if greg gave you a poor score on a task?

i would definitely argue back, i would need him to fully understand my thought process on what i did so that he could reconsider his score LOL

unless it's an objectively shit performance, then i'll just shut up and take it

taskmaster ask game

[taskmasteristics]

🥔

🥔- do you think joe should've gotten the full 5 points for his potato throw?

see, as a mere spectator i have sympathy for him and would want to give him the points.

...however if i was one of the other contestants, i just know i would've argued tooth and nail that he was stood on the red green

taskmaster ask game

[taskmasteristics]

😇-on a scale of "malicious compliance" to "paying alex to do the task for you", how likely would you be to find loopholes for the task at hand?

i would definitely be nitpicking the life out of every task to see if there's a loophole i can use, but that's only if i don't see an immediate solution to it

i would also definitely get annoyed abt alex repeating "all the info is on the task" over and over when i try to ask abt loopholes

taskmaster ask game

[taskmasteristics]

👑- you get to choose a "champion of champions"-esque episode, but for an entirely different category (worst contestants, funniest contestants etc.). what category, and which contestants do you choose?

i'd do a real curveball of an episode where it's contestants who were caught out for cheating on tasks! and maybe there would be extra points available for if contestants cheat and get away with it.

so the contestants would be: - tim key - al murray (does it count as cheating if he just throws money at everything?) - mawaan rizwan - munya chawawa - dave gorman

taskmaster ask game