Tc went away and i miss him in a very pathetic way
no cuz eric went away to Rome with the seniors for a whole week and school has been incredibly boring without him.
he comes back THIS friday sooooo we'll see if something goes down!
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kids remind me, often, of the things i've taught myself out of.
i have a big dog. he looks like a deer. he is taller than most young children. while we were on a trail the other day, a boy coming our direction saw us and froze. he took a step back and said: "i'm feeling nervous. your - your dog is kind of big."
goblin and i both stopped walking immediately. "he is kind of a big dog," i admitted. "he's called a greyhound. they are gentle but they are pretty tall, which is kind of scary, you're right. their legs are so long because they are made for running fast. i am sorry we scared you. would you like us to stand still while you move past us, or would you feel more safe in your body if we move and you stay still?'
"oh. i didn't know that about - greyhounds. i think i ... i want to stay still," he said. at this point, his adult had caught up to us. "i'm nervous about the dog," he told her, "so i'm - i'm gonna stay still." she didn't argue. she didn't make fun of him. she just smiled at him and at me and held his hand while goblin and i, with as wide of a berth as we could make, crept our way through.
behind us, i heard him exhale a deep breath and kind of laugh - "he was really big, huh? she said it's because greyhounds have to go fast."
"he was big," she said. "i understand why that could have made you a little scared."
"yeah. next time i - next time do you think i could maybe ask to touch him? when - i mean, next time, maybe, if i'm not nervous."
later, going to a work event, in the big city, i stood outside, trembling. my social anxiety as a caught bird in my chest. i took a deep breath and turned to my coworker. she's not even really my friend yet. i told her: "i feel nervous about this. i am not used to meeting new people, ever since covid."
she laughed, but not in a mean way. she said she was nervous too. she reached her hand out and held mine, and we both took another deep breath and walked in like that, interlinked. a few people asked us - together? - and i told the truth: i feel nervous, and she's helping. over and over i watched people relax too, admitting i feel really kind of shy lately actually, thank you for saying that.
the next time i go to an event, and i feel a little scared, i ask right away: wanna hold hands? this feels a little dangerous. i hesitate less. i don't hide it as much. i watch for other people who are also nervous and say - it's kinda hard, huh?
i know, logically, i'm not good at asking for help. but i am also not good at noticing when i need help. i've trained myself out of asking completely, but i've also trained myself to never accept my own fears or excuses. i have trained myself to tamp down every anxiety and just-push-through. i don't know what i'm protecting myself from - just that i never think to admit it to anyone.
but every person on earth occasionally needs comfort. every person on earth occasionally needs connection. many of us were taught independence is the same thing as never needing anything.
each of us should have had an adult who heard - i feel nervous and held our hand and asked us how we could be helped to feel safe. no judgement, and no chiding. many of us did not. many of us were punished for the ways that we seemed "weak".
but here is something: i am an adult now. and i get nervous a lot, actually. and if you are an adult and you are feeling a little nervous - come talk to me. we can hold hands and figure out what will help us feel safe in our bodies. and maybe, next time, if we're brave, we can pet the dog that's passing.
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teacher crush more like teacher conflict
no cuz i used to have a crush on this guy but then beef happened and i hate him but he still tries to win me over again.
Not gonna happen sir! you may have a pretty face and a good posture but im not gonna forget how you failed me as an authority figure.
I'm still lowkey into him though. I enjoy the dram of our dynamic
Soooo, i'm not new to the tc community BUT i have never posted anything before so bc of my current situation with my tc i have decided to start a blog cuz i NEED to tell someone about this SOAP OPERA i have going on with a certain chemistry professor.
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Hi! i love your art! And I'm curious about something: what do you think of the staff? And which is your favorite?
thank you! ❤️❤️❤️ I LOVE the staff, I wish we got to see more of them -- every once in a while we'll get a little side bit of them interacting with each other and it's always SO good. (for that and more proof that EHN is the best event, see: the teachers trying to hold their own Halloween party without Crowley noticing because they don't want to invite him. why was this one scene and not a long-spanning subplot like it deserved to be. we were robbed.)
I have probably made it pretty obvious which of the staff is my favorite, because I love characters who are huge morons who couldn't read a room if they had industrial-strength prescription glasses:
but I'm pretty fond of all of them! it takes a certain kind of person to work at NRC for more than five minutes. though I do think Trein is probably my second favorite? he LOVES his cat! he LOVES his wife! he LOVES history even though he is fed up with these teens and their wacky misadventures! also, I really want to hear the rest of his saucy makeout story. talk about dangling plot threads. 😔
genuinely we need more staff interactions in canon, there is so much untapped hilarity there I CAN FEEL IT
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