#that it's rly becoming.... noticeable........
Text
in the arms of the broken — daryl dixon
a/n: to the dear nonnie that requested this 🫶🏻 thank u sm i absolutely adored writing this (i rly should be sleeping but i can’t so here i am) i hope you enjoy !!
if you enjoyed reading this, please support me by giving me a like, reblog, and/or comment ! don’t forget to follow me either if you want to read more of my stuff !
request: anon said — “i also like the dialogue prompt ‘i don’t know… i’ve never seen her like this’ that tugs at the heart strings”
summary: reader cannot cope with the way the world has become, during a particularly hard night for themselves, daryl dixon is the one to comfort them.
warnings: angst/sadness ,,, thats it rly
word count: 1,241
recourses: divider by @adornedwithlight
➵ tp!daryl masterlist
➵ regular masterlist
here is my ask box !
the night was quiet except for the crackle of the fire, but it felt wrong—like the world had gone still, holding its breath. you sat by the flames, knees drawn to your chest, staring blankly into the flickering light. the heat touched your skin, but it didn’t reach you, didn’t chase away the cold that had settled deep inside.
daryl watched you from a distance, leaning against a tree with his arms crossed over his chest. he’d been keeping an eye on you for days, noticing the way you’d been pulling away from everyone, isolating yourself. you’d always been strong, always held it together for the sake of the group, but something was different now. something had changed, and it scared him. you were like a shadow of yourself, your spirit drained, your eyes distant.
rick approached him, eyes flicking over to you before meeting daryl’s. “how’s she holdin’ up?”
daryl didn’t answer right away, his jaw tightening as he watched the way you sat so still, your body hunched like the weight of everything had finally become too much to carry. he shook his head, his voice quiet and rough. “i don’t know… i’ve never seen her like this.”
rick nodded, his expression grim. “she’s been through a lot. more than most of us. maybe she just needs some time.”
rick can recall the first time they found you, smack bang in the middle of atlanta, all alone. you were covered in blood and guts, and if he hadn’t actually heard how you begged for help when he saw you, your voice barely audible, he honestly would have thought you were just another walker.
“time ain’t gonna fix what’s broken,” daryl muttered under his breath, the frustration simmering beneath his skin. time wasn’t enough when you were drowning, when you couldn’t see a way out of the darkness. and he hated that he didn’t know how to pull you out.
rick gave him a look, one that said everything he didn’t need to say out loud. “you’re the one she’ll listen to, daryl. talk to her.”
daryl stood there a moment longer, watching the way you curled into yourself, like you were trying to disappear. every instinct in him told him to go to you, but he hesitated, unsure if his words would even matter. still, he couldn’t just leave you like this.
he finally pushed off the tree and walked over, his boots crunching softly against the dirt. he lowered himself to the ground beside you, sitting close enough that you could feel his presence, but not so close that he’d crowd you.
for a while, neither of you said anything. the fire crackled between you, the only sound breaking the silence of the night. daryl wasn’t sure how to start, wasn’t good with words even on the best of days. but he knew you, and he knew the way you got when things started to spiral out of control in your head.
“you don’t gotta shut us out, y’know,” he finally said, his voice gruff but soft. “we’re all here for ya.”
you didn’t respond at first, your eyes still fixed on the flames like they held some kind of answer you were searching for. after a long moment, you sighed, your voice barely a whisper. “i’m tired, daryl.”
those words hit him like a punch to the gut. he’d seen people break before, seen the way this world could wear someone down until there was nothing left. but hearing you say it, seeing you like this—it scared him more than he wanted to admit.
“i know,” he said quietly. “we all are. but we’re still fightin’. you’re still fightin’.”
you shook your head, your voice trembling as you spoke. “i don’t know if i can anymore. every day feels like it’s getting harder. like… like i’m losing pieces of myself.”
daryl’s chest tightened. he’d always admired your strength, the way you kept going no matter how hard things got. but now, hearing you say you were falling apart—it made him realize just how much he hadn’t noticed.
“you ain’t losin’ yourself,” he said, his voice firm but gentle. “you’re still here. we’re still here.”
you swallowed hard, tears brimming in your eyes. “i feel like i’m drowning. like no matter what i do, it’s never enough. i can’t save everyone, daryl.”
that was it, wasn’t it? the burden you carried, the weight of trying to protect everyone, to hold the group together when everything was falling apart. it was breaking you.
daryl shifted closer, his hand reaching out to rest on your arm, hesitant at first, but firm once it was there. “you don’t gotta save everyone. that ain’t on you.”
your voice cracked as you spoke, the tears spilling over now. “but if i don’t… who will?”
daryl’s heart clenched at the raw pain in your voice. he wished he had the right words, wished he could take that weight off your shoulders. but he knew he couldn’t fix everything. what he could do, though, was remind you that you weren’t alone.
“you don’t have to,” he said, his thumb gently brushing your arm in a way that was more comforting than he realized. “we’re all in this together. you ain’t gotta carry the world by yourself.”
you turned to look at him, and the vulnerability in your eyes nearly broke him. he wasn’t used to seeing you like this, so lost and fragile. he hated it. he hated that you felt like you had to carry the world alone, that you felt like you were drowning.
“i don’t know how to stop feeling like this,” you whispered, your voice shaking. “everything feels so heavy.”
daryl swallowed hard, his own heart aching at how much pain you were in. he didn’t know how to take that pain away, but he could be there for you. he could be the one thing you could hold on to when everything else felt like it was slipping away.
“you ain’t alone,” he said, his voice low but steady. “you got me. no matter what, you got me.”
you looked at him then, really looked at him, and for the first time in days, you felt like you could breathe just a little easier. his words were simple, but they grounded you. daryl had always been your anchor, and in this moment, you needed him more than ever.
without thinking, you leaned into him, your forehead resting against his shoulder as the tears came harder, your body shaking with the force of them. daryl didn’t hesitate. he wrapped his arm around you, pulling you closer, his hand rubbing slow circles on your back.
“let it out,” he murmured, his voice barely above a whisper. “it’s okay. i got ya.”
and for the first time in a long time, you let yourself fall apart. you let the tears come, let the pain you’d been holding in for so long spill out. daryl didn’t say anything more, didn’t need to. he just held you, his presence steady and unwavering, letting you know without words that you didn’t have to carry this burden alone.
the fire crackled softly beside you, but the world felt a little less cold with daryl holding you. you weren’t okay. you weren’t sure when—or if—you’d ever be okay again. but for now, in his arms, you felt like you didn’t have to be.
and maybe that was enough.
#🦇 — vi writes#🏹 — daryl dixon#daryl dixon#daryl dixon x reader#daryl dixon imagine#daryl dixon imagines#daryl dixon oneshot#daryl dixon fanfic#daryl dixon fanfiction#daryl dixon drabble#daryl dixon headcanon#twd daryl dixon#the walking dead#the walking dead imagine#the walking dead imagines#the walking dead oneshot#the walking dead fanfic#the walking dead fanfiction#the walking dead drabble#the walking dead headcanon#twd#twd imagine#twd imagines#twd oneshot#twd fanfic#twd fanfiction#twd drabble#twd headcanon
23 notes
·
View notes
Text
i feel rly sad and conflicted abt one of my best friends on earth but idk who to ask for advice bc i usually would have consulted her in this situation lmao
#shes cool and i dont want to lose her and i know Logically i love her but atm i feel so strange towards her#and idk what to do abt it bc i know in the past ive like...over-communicated a lot and over the last few yrs ive been trying to not do that#bc thats an anxious impulse i think .so like . self control#AND IMPORTANTLY . i may actually be the problem here ?? ok again i love her i dont want to lose her etc but basically ive noticed a pattern#which is that whenever she gets a bf/a man (even fwb) in her life she basically stops talking to me and the limited interactions we do have#become abt him. and while i support her it is acc too much. like we barely talked while she was w her ex bf until he became abusive and#then we talked a lottt like all our convos understandably were abt him . and then when they broke up we kept hanging out so i didnt rly see#the pattern there but still she seemed to centre men a lot in her life like sbe was excited to not date and find herself and then#immediately afterwards started seeing this other guy with whom shes basically in a relationship now#hes nice and all but like . HES ALL SHE TALKS ABT . actually we barely talk atp but when we do its abt him#she sends me reels sometimes but its all abt being jealous abt him etc . and shes bi but she said she doesnt like the idea of dating women#bc theyre scary . and i thought she was kidding in the ohhh women r so beautiful that theyre intimidating way but no she was being entirely#fr . she explained jts bc she was bullied by a girl in the past but like...bro ur ex bf literally abused you like surely you see men are#capable of just as much harm? but obvs who she dates is her own choice . but anyway she has consistently made plans w me then cancelled the#like an hr before . or asked to call me and then proceeded to not do so . when i ask her to meet/call its the same she just doesnt respond#or she cancels ? and while i understand anxiety sucks it feels SO WEIRD STILL . maybe im the problem slightly too bc ik i have no right to#feel this way but it rubs me the wrong way that ik she has so much time to spend w him/calls him all the time despite meeting him just a fe#months ago whereas i just have to like ...be ok w not actually having talked to her for a long time#its gotten to the point where when she says do you wanna meet/call i automatically respond yes and then just assume it doesnt happen . like#there have been several times over the past few months i double booked plans over when we were supposed to call/meet bc i was sure she#wouldnt show up and ive been right each time#like she sends me texts that she misses me or im her best friend etc etc occasionally and then acts rly . contrary to that ?#ive talked to her abt the issue w cancelling on me twice btw. when i was still dating the situationship person she would get sooo mad at#them for not respecting my time and shed tell me i deserve better etc etc and then like . she doesnt seem to respect my time at all#anyway she said she understand and she admits to like...being flaky etc but does nothing abt it#and its not like i can tell her to stop caring so much abt men bc we sorta had convos like that b4 she got This involved w this guy#and apparently it did nothing and the last thing i want is to police her relationships or get in her way#its just AUSHD AUGH#anyway i rly miss her it just doesnt feel the same at all anymore
14 notes
·
View notes
Text
Thinks abt my lob corp nuggets oh so hard. I may only have second hand half remembered knowledge of project moon worldbuilding but I will still forever obsess over my lil guys who suck absolute ass
#rat rambles#oc posting#I <3 women who are just straight up bad people#this is mostly abt my girl yuri but its also abt my girl juliet#yuri is well. she's certainly smth.#she's very fascinated in psychology and in particular the psychology behind abnormalities#and it is for this reason that shes in disciplinary#for most of her life one of the things that had facinated her most is the mind'd reaction to pain and suffering#so she finds suppressing abnormalities to be very fun and interesting#her girlfriend maxy certainly has an interesting perspective on this aspect of yuri to but it kindly#maxy has a lot of self loathing mostly relating to how numb shes become to everything and how unatural it is for her to care abt stuff#so she sees yuri as a far better person than she is because she still manages to care and be passionate abt things#she deeply admires and loves yuri and feels like she doesnt deserve yuri's affection#maxy is also the only person that I say yuri genuinely cares abt on a personal level#most of the time even ppl yuri rly likes arent safe from her morbid curiosity but she genuinely cares abt maxy's wellbeing#now juliet is generally a lot less extreme than yuri but shes still not great#juliet and her bestie loki both are genuinely very invested in the cause and goals of lob corp which is the first red flag#but juliet is the more noteworthy of the two actions wise because she actually interacts with fellow employees#she was among the first employees here and while she comes off as friendly and nice she takes her job incredibly seriously and doesn't fuck#around when it comes to productivity levels#she generally respects malkuth a lot more than any of the other robots and actively dislikes most of the others#most newbies tend to like her because of her being one of the few higher ranking employees thats friendly and welcoming but most that make#it longer term tend to realize quick that she doesn't care abt any of them#but whats often worse than her not caring abt you is her seeing potential in you#if she sees potential in someone she will make it very clear and do everything in her power to help them realize that potential#one of my other higher ranking guys mason very much hates juliet because of that exact situation#mason rly didnt know what she was getting into when she got hired at lob corp and mostly worked with the much softer abnos for her first#while at the job until she was thrown into the deep end to work on censored#most of the other higher level employees at the time wouldnt be able to make it through a work session with censored but she was#barely. but it was enough that juliet took notice of her and decided that maybe this guy was worth keeping around afterall
3 notes
·
View notes
Text
Don’t feel like coloring this but wifey as 007 :D
#weird to not have to stare at a real life pic to make this#drawing ocs is rly ‘reality is what i make it!#i need to draw Noir as her Bond girl/villain#she’d try to make herself a honey pot to seduce Rüß and then Rüß would immediately see thru her ploy#but obviouslyyy still go along w it 🤭#‘of course i dont notice how youre obviously trying to trap me in this room’#‘oh you want to tie me up in a totally sexy and not suspicious way? be my guest!’#its funny cause i always draw Noir in a suit but she’d def be wearing one of those slit dresses in this#with like a knife blatantly strapped to her leg but Rüß finds her way too amusing to call her out on it#and thus noir becomes her guard dog#catie.rambling.txt#catie.art.
8 notes
·
View notes
Text
one thing about years is that they'll always have some sort of music in them. has anyome else noriced this
#hooly noises#every year it feels like theres an artist whose discography becomes the only thing i listen to for the most part. for the rest of the year#the scary jokes glass beach pup jeff rosenstock#its kind of turned into something to look forward to. thought itd just be pup (<3) again this year but hellmode came out and i realized#fuuckk. this shits good#looking forward to next year. glass beach plastic death coming out in january. the singles have been rly rly good#just a pattern ive been noticing. my brain needs to latch onto an artist or two to fuel an entire year or else i'll become listless and shri#vel up like a raisin#but a lot of the time im sooo stubborn about listening to new music or playing new games or what ever. so when somethinf breaks through that#it has to be either really special on its own or really fucking catered to me. and also i have to be in the mood#which is why listening to doubt off of hellmode as a single i was like jesus man. are you hearing this. and promptly dove off into the deep#end#cool music. shout out to cool music that i like
19 notes
·
View notes
Text
looking up info on keloid scarring is so helpful. thanks man I didn't think of trying that one
#well actually that kind of is relevant bc ive been trying to find more info abt tattooing keloid prone skin#which is effectively opting to wound urself. but everywhere is just like if ur keloid prone ummm. Don't do it 👍#theres not enough known abt keloids to predict if theyll be triggered or not by the healing process like it depends on so many things#i mostly get them from acne scars. but they dont always immediately appear sometimes its weeks or months after#n once u get them theyre permanent. treatments for them have a 100% rate of recurrence n will grow back bigger if u try to excise them#and they cant be tattooed over like other scars bc they dont hold ink n the irritation can cause them to get bigger too#it depends a lot on the tattoo artists skill/experience ig like u have to know Exactly how deep ur tattooing + how the wound will heal#bc if healing triggers keloids. well ill just end up with permanent scarring instead theres nothing i can do if it happens#which honestly might still look cool but its unpredictable bc they tend to extend past the original wound. n it wouldnt scar uniformly#urgh. i should probably talk to a gp n an actual tattooist abt it. i could ask to get like a rly small tattoo to test how my skin reacts#pointless thinking abt rn anyway cuz im not gonna get one any time soon i have some other shit to sort before that#but it would be so frustrating if i cant i have so many tattoo ideas i do rly want them.... :-(#ah well whatever.. im just procrastinating doing shit i need to crack on bc i cant spend another entire weekend doing nothing#after a month n a half of being on meds i feel like theyre becoming less effective. my task paralysis n focus is getting worse again :(#like its taking more and more effort its been rly noticeable at work. hoping its just bc of general mental health or poor sleep or smth#and not that im building tolerance or smth bc man. what else can i even do if that happens#this is gonna make me miserable to think abt so lets go do smth else!#at least i woke up feeling tons better today 💪💪💪 storm passed baby#.diaries
2 notes
·
View notes
Note
DE DONDE SALIO EL DIGIPOSTEO MI QUERIDO AMIGO VIRTUALITO?? pregunto por un amigo (esta franquicia es mi infancia)
OMG NERONWRONERONWEROOOO7O FELLOW DIGIMОN ENJOYER HI HI HIIII !! 💖 Justamente vos sos de quien siempre me he acordado cada qe veía cualquier cosa relacionada a la franquicia before properly getting into it myself . I feel like we've come full circle(?)
GHWJRHJWHEHEHE ANYWAYS i started watching Digimоn Adventure relatively recently after some friends & I became interested in visiting the franchise (or, well— re-visiting, in their cases; 'twas my 1st time being exposed to the series in my case <"3) y H E R M A N O noexagero cuando digo que he pasado por Todo Un Arco De Desarrollo De Personaje viendo esta vaina i'm literally so unwell Y ESO QUE TODAVÍA NI LA ACABO‼️‼️HEAD IN HANDS, literal aún estoy en proceso de negación al respecto even now bc there's like No Way my attitude went from thinking it was so insane and off-the-wall I was sure I would only end up enjoying it ironically to being Deeply&Irreparably Emotionally Invested w/ it oVER THE COURSE OF 40 EPISODES 🗣
So, naturally, I've developed brainrot about it grins 😁
#coping w/ the fact that ive legitimately become obsessed w the anime i kept making fun of by spamming beasts in ppl's dash nonstop /lh#COULDN'T BEAT THE DIGIENJOYER ALLEGATIONS ‚ CAÍ EN SUS GARRAS AL FINAL OTL EL DIGIPOSTING ES PRUEBA FEHACIENTE DE ELLO#Me sorprendió what can i say . It rly turned my world upside down & before i noticed it'd earned a special place in my heart 😔#thatse how good it is ig..'tis a renowned well-loved classic for a reason...I can acknowledge its greatness nowthat ive grown as a person(?#Pwro no tenés idea del golpe al ego que represwntó para mi#el darme cuenta qe poco a poco me iba interesando más genuinamente por cómo avanzaba la trama y los eventos que transcurrían en pantalla 🧎#<- World's worst at assimilating own changed opinions; WILL be dramatic abt it (all /lh tho ^_^♡)#asks#btw nadaquever pero since we'll most likely b watching further after we're done w/Adventure — u have no idea how Excited iam 2 reach Tamers#not just bcuz it's the Bestest Part from what i've heard But also bc i believe that's the one terriermоn appears in??#Y pues desdesiempre me ha dado curiosidad la creatura :} even moreso since u mentioned its a cc of yours hace tiempazo#so im excited 2 meet them now!! ! 🫶🏼#anyways i rlyrly love digimоn i mean who said that
8 notes
·
View notes
Text
anyway here’s your reminder that you should reblog from multiple authors if you like their works!! i’ve had friends who will queue up their fic recs/use their likes as a way of bookmarking fics and that’s entirely valid, but it’s important to rb from more than just a few if you can!! there’s SO many good writers out there and it really goes a long way to reblog their works <3
#wooahaes.txt#daily reminder that this is a writing blog and not a fic rec blog btw#if i ran a fic recs blog i'd rb a Lot more and id probably brave the tags a lot more often#unfortunately i dont rly have the time for that bc there's a lot of good writers out there <3#i've talked to holly and livvie abt this but the writer half of caratblr feels so exclusive nowadays when it comes to rbs.. .#i thought that it might get better but it rly never did...? its discouraging as hell tbh#these past few week or so ive gone w/o actively writing + posting has been a smidge cathartic just bc ive been stressed#n dealing w mental health bullshit a lot. but it also like... rly showed me that only a small number of ppl actively rb stuff when im not#actively putting it out which... genuinely sucks#it feels like its all becoming some exclusive club and if anything was going to like#make me put svt on the backburner and focus on other groups i think that'd be it#i notice it a lot too in the gif-making community but thats a whole other rant#(abt how u can tag everything properly and still have a set that flops bc ppl just dont rb shit)
21 notes
·
View notes
Photo
5 years in review (2018-2022)
#art review#year in review#art summary#art meme#my art#i wanted to look at them together :)))#i feel like 2018 is a solid start#2019 was a little rough as i learn a new medium [digital art]#2020 was mw sort of finding brand stability in the types of pieces i did#2021 was pushing myself to really improve with focus on texture and unintentional focus on lighting#and 2022 was a fucking STRUGGLE trying to learn how to put art out consistently while working full time#like for example. jan feb march of this year. i only put out one piece each month#bc i rly dont like my job lmao and it took so much out of me >moving cross country >starting first full time job >moving AGAIN across town#also the piece from july looks wonky to me now but it still is the most polished thing from that month bc i did a bunch of quick art fight p#ieces#unintentional themes for this year: realism. red/teal palettes [or more generally warm/cool contrast].#almost exclusively music fanart or mh/sta stuff#idk im always over critical of my year in review stuff when i first make them then warm up as i become nostalgic#you can also notice a trend of yellow slowly becoming completely absent from my works. this is bc my old laptop had issues with displaying#color and washed yellow out so i never saw it. hence why old drawings of ppl look RLY JAUNDICED. i couldnt goddamn see it#and i dont rly gravitate towards yellow too often#aqua is my fave color in general but also to work with#i didnt do 0 traditional art this year but i felt like i did less that usual probably bc i used to work on my bed but now i work at my desk#which is Very Small and doesnt have a lot of space for me to get out pens or paints or whatever#that and also. less time and energy than in previous years :(#my faves for each year by month: jan-21 feb-19 mar-21 apr-22 may-22 jun-22 jul-18 aug-22 sep-21 oct-#18/21 [tie] nov-21 dec-22 [altho i def seem to always push myself to make sth rly good in the last month of the year tbh]
9 notes
·
View notes
Text
Is anyone else's immune system just total and complete trash since covid
#like i can't even get a cold now without it turning into a whole Event™#it's not FAIR#i have SHIT TO DO#and i swear i used to be one of those people who rarely got sick#or if i did i would bounce back really quick#now i'm down and out for at least 4 days#i hate it here#especially bc my useless optometrist wHO JUST CAME OFF ALMOST 3 WEEKS LEAVE#had a cough on friday#and had the audacity to say to me#his boss#'oh i might have monday off... you know... to rest'#and i said#no❤️#because how convenient that tuesday is a public holiday and it's become A VERY VERY NOTICEABLE PATTERN#that he does this shit#anyways what i rly said is we'll see how you're going over the weekend like mATE#so now i'm purely showing up to work tomorrow just to spite him#LMFOSMSOWMSOSKSKSKSMOSEJKDKEKDKE#i'll do a few hours and leave early it's fine i'm not a total workaholic#⬅️ me when i lie#anyways#what was the point of all this?#oh right#I'M SICK AND I HATE IT#it was barely a sore throat and the LIGHTEST cold symptoms#and now i'm 😴😴😴😴#dying a little#but it's fine#i basically just ate a whole lemon smothered in garlic and shit LNFODMSOEMDKD
5 notes
·
View notes
Text
u ever look back on a situation you were in and think to yourself “Damn That Was Kinda Fucked Up Actually.”
#[tldr if im being noticeably anxious on discord its just The Horrors dw abt it]#not rly a vent but i kinda just wanna talk about this#(lying)#feel free to not read the tags lol#so like. last year i was friends with this person on discord right#she was about about a year older than me and lived in canada (<-- unessential info)#we met thru some discord server and started talking more. which was going fine#i helped her with some art project she was doing and it was nice to be able to talk to someone during lockdowns#but as we grew closer i sort of became her 24/7 emotional support??? i guess?????#thats what it felt like#so like she had a lot of shit goin on right. like her family was abusive; she was depressed; she wasnt able to keep friends;#like it was a whole thing#i dont wanna give too much detail cause its someone elses shit but u get the idea#anyway i ended up becoming one of her few friends that she could talk to regularly. it was alr for a bit but it just became draining#like she would SEMI REGULARLY just talk at me saying how depressed she was and how shed considered offing herself before#textbook traumadump style#of course that wasnt her fault i dont wanna make her look like the bad guy here but. still#worst part of it was that her anxiety would spike big time if the person she was messaging was online and didnt respond within 5-10 minutes#like 24/7#which just made those moments way worse cause i am SHIT at offering comfort /especially/ at that age#so it just became this huge stressor for the both of us whenever she started something like that#for the last couple months before we cut it off id considered just telling her i didnt want to be friends anymore BUT#id seen in real time her other online friends cutting her off with their reasoning being she was too much to handle#and i didnt want to make her feel worse than she already felt. and i feel bad for saying this but she was genuinely too much to handle#thankfully she was the one who cut it off first (her reasoning she was jealous that i didnt have abusive parents and could keep friends)#literally the few days after we stopped talking i felt WAY less default stressed and i realised our friendship was taking a toll on us both#i still feel bad about this but she tried messaging me a few weeks later asking if we wanted to be friends again and i just. blocked her#i was in fuckin Survival Mode after realising how fucked up the situation was. 20/20 hindsight. and i just didnt want to go back#i shouldve actually talked to her and explained how i felt but. oh well i guess#but yeah we stopped talking a year ago and i think im still a bit fucked up from it lol
4 notes
·
View notes
Text
my belly is already getting fuzzier after abt a week on t which is wild to me
#wasnt rly expecting anything at all this early but the hair is noticeably thicker but not anything super significant#its just funny. like am i really on the road to becoming a werewolf literally i am already so hairy
6 notes
·
View notes
Text
just noticed a weird pattern w tumblr
#whenever i make a post that gets over 1k notes#follower gain tanks for the next like 2 months#like literally 3 new followers per day or smth it becomes rly rly slow#which btw is like. ok. like tumblr is not abt having a lot of followers bc thats meaningless its just a vibe yk. etc etc#but its like. interesting that it happens ? like i wonder why that happens. its rly noticeable now that i think abt it
4 notes
·
View notes
Text
Thinks oh so hard abt the spiraling upwards clan founders, especially the birchclan founders. Silly lil kitties who's pasts are drenched in blood with the primary regret of not drawing it sooner
#rat rambles#oc posting#warriors posting#spiraling upwards#long story short they had a shitty awful terrible leader who sucked absolutely ass and they tore him to shreds#I mean that literally they pinned him onto the mountain side and slashed and mauled the shit out of him so hard that his lives evaporated#and several of the cats involved in that scene are sill alive and major parts of the story and I love them#oh also the cat that pinned him through a stab through the throat was his own daughter btw everyone hated his ass so much#and for good reason get his ass#alas in the main story I dont rly get to go too deep into how he harmed everyone involved mostly just three main ones#aka bristlestar because shes murtlepaw's ghost mom dawncrackle because hes also haunting murtle and gullspot because shes bristle's kit#so basically all the flashbacks we get involve those three in some form or another#honeystar was also there and involved but Im not currently planning on having her rly talk abt that#most of her more modern angst is the fact that she was forced into leadership against her will#and shes been alive long enough that shes been leading birchclan far longer than she ever lived in her old clan#but she did go through a lot of shit before birchclan was founded and it definitely shaped her a lot#she used to be a very determined and high spirited lil kitty cat who tried to be optimistic#but her family began to slowly be picked off one by one by both the old leader and the one whod later get evicerated#some of the older cats around her hoped it make her back down from her revelutionary ideas but she noticed that and it backfired on them#instead of being worn down to submission she became absolutely Furious and began to lash out more and become more demanding#it got to the point that she really only had two friends in the entire clan and one of them was her aunt whod later also die after coming#out abt having witnessed the leader killing his own kits#that was the final fucking straw for her and she was fully on board when bristle and dawn started looking for cats to join their rebellion#she did get rly frustrated with them as they waited patiently for the right moment but her remaining bestie kept her from going apeshit#so once the big fight finally broke out she was more than eager to join the hoard of cats chasing the bastard upwards#now unlike some of the other cats involved this legitimately actually made her feel a lot better for a while#for the first time in ages she finally felt like she could be optimistic abt smth again and was excited abt the idea of leaving this place#she had lost so much in this damn place since she was an apprentice and just wanted to finally be able to rest easy#but once they got to their new territory and set up camp things went south real fast as a flood fucked everything up#and after losing the only cat she had left in her life and losing her tail and being made deputy on top of that she deteriorated quickly
3 notes
·
View notes
Text
.
Ignore
#delete later#im so exhausted and stressed. theres such a lack of stability and its freaking me out SO much. im just constantly tense and waiting#for something terrible to happen. im starting to think that im not gonna get to go to the entomology thing ive been hoping#how i can't do things independently and i must have been forced into this abd rhen it'll get cruel towards my friends abd i cant#and my aunt is getting worse abd my parents are waiting for me to fail abd have to move bsck with them which i can't do bc#to go to for months bc ill probably need to use that time off for preparing to move. which sucks. ive been looking forward to it#i was letting myself get my hopes up and that was a mistake bc now im rly disappointed. im hoping i can go but honestly#idk if it'd be financially responsible. same with comic con. its in october so i can probably go but it might not be a financially#good idea. it just. the things i was counting on to be stable sources of joy are not stable anymore and that's making everything worse#and im tryinh to be positive but im so anxious. theres just so much. i need to think about packing and try to figure out#how im going to move 1-2 hours away. how am i going to coordinate with movers whilst having to get the train to meet them#im disabled and cabt help move things so only getting one person ro deliver worries me. movers arent insured to take ppl with them#theres just SO MUCH. And i can't view properties easily bc of work so im missing out on multiple places that ive been contacting#ppl about abd i couldnt line up enough for last week when i was off bc it was too short notice and i just. its TOO MUCH TOO MUCH#im overwhelmed. im trying to think of the food im gonna cook when im there ahd the armchair im gonna buy#im gonna eat so much fucking lamb and fish oh ny god im excited for THAT#i wany to just go for the shittiest place to at least have some stability and bc i still have yhat kernel of thought that i dont#deserve comfort but im trying to fight it bc i do. i deserve somewhere nice and its unfair on myself not to find somewhere nice#especially as ill be living alone. i cant go for places that have no natural light or are four stories up or are a mile away from the train#station bc that will wreck my mental health and i wont have ready access to socialising that can stabilise me. gotta be fair#to myself. but THATS PROVING REAL DIFFICULT#im doing good saving though so thats nice i guess. fuck me moving is expensive. moving when you've got zero kitchen supplies is#even more so. gonna be an Interesting first couple days in the new place.#it will be. very bad. they keep texting me asking about it and i have to be positive bc otherwise itll become a conversation about#field all that shit when im like this. i just cant. that requires so much fucking energy i dont have. and i wont move back#id frankly rather die. and trying to not say that and decline politely sucks. bc they get the look of#oh we're not good enough huh#and i can't field their fucking feelings. i either need a pause button or a fast forward. id take either one#so many of these tags ended up out of order whoops. but these arent meant to be read anyway#i just need to scream bc idk what else to do
0 notes
Text
mexican internet is so fucked bro why is the first result a tiktok search link
#ive noticed this with a lot of results tho its not usually the first#refused to believe ppl rly use tiktok as a search engine but um well im becoming a believer
1 note
·
View note
Last Seen Blogs
ridicbird
RidiculousBird
splat-superfly
Superfly (splatoon)
dxmon
A little wicked
smileforthecamerabitches
I HATE EVERYONE