#thats enough to convict her in her own eyes i think

[sieglinde-freud]

grabs ur hands dm ur reasoning rn *looks at you with my big eyes*

YOU GUYS ARE PEER PRESSURING ME WTF... but ok im just gonna post it here then hi tc thank u for the ask :) going under the read more because my initial ramblings were literally 3k but let me see if i can chop it down. cw: LONG. also pic for reference so we know what im talking about

so the placements all assume the only headcanon thats real going into this is that the morgans are siblings. no canon second parents which means no chrom!inigo or anything like that they all have single moms or whatever idk not important but just clarifying none of that is impacting their placements because i dont want to think about that

black eagle placements were the most fun because the fun thing about that route is that it splits into two more! one thing thats always bothered me is that when that route splits, the only thing that changes is that you either lose edelgard or hubert or you lose flayn. are you really telling me those are the only three students with enough free will to not let byleth pick the rest of their life for them? ferdinand would NOT go to the church i dont care!!! this is something they fixed (kind of) in warriors but in general when picking the black eagles i wanted to keep that in mind too

so kjelle was the first character i looked at and went “i know where you go.” i think she looks at edelgard and goes “you are everything i want to be and more” because what edelgard fights for and how she accomplishes it. kjelle is a very “the strong must protect the weak by any means necessary” which is kind of harsh when its presented to the player in awakening but it is literally edelgard’s whole philosophy. and kjelle is very egotistical (not hate i love her ass so much underrated fav!!) she thinks incredibly highly of herself so for her to bow down to anyone they would have to 1) echo her ideals and 2) be stronger than her. sorry shes never bending the knee to dimitri and claude i dont give a fuck she doesnt like those men. i think she’d understand edelgard’s idea of putting power in human hands and fully commit to the ends justify the means. this isnt really a gameplay rewrite thing im trying to do but if byleth picked the church she would leave. also… please. please please consider edelkjelle… okay guys… for me……..

on the opposite side nah was my second immediate “ohh i know what im doing with you” and its because if byleth picks edelgard, shes out!! granted, i could just put her with lions or deer but how is that fun. its not. nah, being a manakete, would probably be much more understanding of rhea and willing to reach out. being a manakete is probably a pretty isolating experience for her, ylisse or fodlan or otherwise, so i think her finding solace with rhea and flayn and seteth during her time at the academy would allow her to get closer to people more like her, and understand on some level why rhea is the way she is and why governs the way she does. though, still being housemates, she’d befriend edelgard and i think she’d admire edelgard’s conviction and maturity during the academy arc. but when edelgard betrays the church i think she’d take that very hard, and i dont think anything edelgard would say to her would get her to turn on what is basically the family she never got to have (theres also second gen angst potential in here somewhere…)

inigo was interesting to think about and i did almost saddle him in with golden deer but i like the potential of him with edelgard a lot more when i really sat down and thought about it. im pulling more from his characterization as laslow i think but at first i wasn’t really sure if i had a case for him picking between the empire and the church but i decided to go with the empire because i do think in the time he has with edelgard, he’d be a voice of reason for her (to hubert’s dismay). edelgard’s problem is that she has literally no outsider pov and is going based on her own sense of justice that, while its based in good intentions, has a lot of unintended consequences and failure to acknowledge how it impacts everyone else. i think inigo could take a unique role, similar to ferdinand (or lorenz to claude, felix to dimitri) in that he challenges edelgard but on a much more friendlier level. the thing about how that role normally plays out is that its formed on some personal grievance rather than genuine better interest of the people, and i think of all the lords, edelgard needs a friend the most (its why shes so attached to byleth???). and just looking at how hes able to handle xander in fates and how much more introspective he becomes, i think it’d play out similarly here. also i think with the forces of him and dorothea combined they would give ferdinand the worst bisexual panic of his life. ik i mentioned felix/inigo WHICH I STILL LIKE but imagine the layer of angst if they are on opposing sides… ok thanks

was on the fence about gerome until beloved mutual (hi woocy :3) convinced me he would be beagle and im completely down with that. for me, i struck out blue lions immediately. so after that its just a matter of do i think he fits in better with BE or GD and quite honestly. for some reason golden deer gets the rep of being the meme house but aside from lorenz looking a little funny anf claude putting up a facade YOU ALL FELL FOR this straight up is not true. the funny house is black eagles and by GOD it would piss gerome off to be there. i dont think they chose their houses, by the way. i think they got to fodlan and rhea vibe checked all of them immediately so he didnt have a say in this. not only is he stuck with inigo, hes stuck with watching kjelle—the strongest warrior ever probably the only one in the second to match him in terms of raw strength—stumble over herself over their house leader because wwaauuw women pretty LIKE COME ONNNN. though, i do think he’d respect edelgard for her strength, and theres a lot of interesting dynamics for him to explore. dorothea pissing him off, bonding with petra over their enjoyment for wildlife, he would definitely be training partners with caspar, and i think he’d actually be like. really good at talking to bernadetta? maybe seeing her reminds him of how he was when he was younger. maybe he gets her out by introducing her to minerva. much to think about. but in general he would keep mostly to himself with standard gerome “cant get close to people that i cant guarantee will stay with me” fashion i think he probably wouldnt be as close as say someone like inigo or nah would be with the house. so when the time to choose a side comes… i dont think he’d have the relationship with edelgard to pick her. i think he would oppose her ideals, and go with nah, if not flee fodlan entirely because omfg who careeesss…. WHO CAREEESS his ass is in wyvern valley (no i think he’d fight. but he’d def consider dipping)

m!morgan is here because i think it would challenge him. guy who is so cute so earnest so ready to be happy in school learning everything hes ever wanted hoping to come home and make momma proud and oh my god he got put in the most crazy house imaginable. whoever his professor is is probably like wow morgan you have a gift for tactics! why dont you try managing the class for a mission? and being morgan he’d go YES ABSOLUTELY!!! unfortunately this house has hubert. and ferdinand. and bernadetta. and linhardt. and caspar. the thing about robin and the shepherds is that most people immediately respected robin as their tactician and robin was able to connect and befriend most of them fairly easily because they were mostly all sane and normal people. the black eagles are most definitely not and have you guys seen that black eagles seating chart post? well. i just think it’d give morgan a hard time and between him and f!morgan its funnier if its him. also splitting him from the justice cabal for timeskip angst sorry. also i think it’d be cool if he took edelgards side. i dont actually know which way he’d lean thats a tossup like this is a character that i could believe would trust byleth’s judgement and go with them but if its edelgard i think that could set up fun conflict between him and nah. grima vs naga part 2!! though i actually did have him for blue lions first if only because of the three houses the blue lions probably need a tactician type the best but. i like this one better.

so for blue lions i immediately clocked owain like look at this guy. i think owain would see the house of cool knightly chivalrous types fighting for justice and being cool and having swords and i just think he’d be in heaven. i also think, to him, dimitri would be a figure to look up to similar to lucina, but with the difference that they are not family and owain might put him on an even higher pedestal because theres this sense of familiarity he had with lucina thats not really there anymore? kind of similar to ashe and dimitri. and when the timeskip comes, i think he’d be endlessly devoted to dimitri even still, never forgetting who he was before and striving to bring him back, still thinking of this idolized version of him, even if it puts himself at risk. i also think in general, owain would thrive in the blue lions house. felix, ashe, ingrid, dedue, annette— those are all prime support partners for him that have a lot of potential. the blue lion house is very… the way that they are. and something owain shows in fates is that though hes very good at using his theatrics to ease people, whether that be on purpose or otherwise, and by god do the blue lions need it. look at them… jesus.

cynthia is in the blue lion house for similar reasons but i think she has a key difference from owain. while i think owain is the type to go down with the ship, i think cynthia might actually serve as an opposition to dimitri and potentially go against him in a similar fashion to felix and annette in thats hidden in the games files and was never put in the game (WHEN IT SHOULD HAVE BEEN. dimitri doesnt get enough push back in azure moon!! another post for another time though). in their time at the academy, while owain is fangirling over dimitri, i think cynthia would too at first. but fodlan is very different than ylisse, and in particular faerghus treats its knights and specifically women knights very differently than cynthia wouldve otherwise been treated. i think this would push cynthia into questioning faerghus’s ideals (especially in getting close to ingrid who im sure she’d find friendship in) and eventually dimitri in how he seemingly upholds those ideals. when he goes down a darker path in the timeskip, she’d probably take felix’s more critical approach, and i think she could turn on him. for the empire? probably not. but i dont think she’d be as down as owain or ingrid to keep following him when hes not taking accountability for what hes doing. she might find her way back once hes come back to himself but who really knows. not me (<- girl who is writing all of this)

yarnes a funny pick because lions are supposed to be brave and fearless and hes a Rabbit. but obviously yarne would be very aware of that irony and i think it could serve as a push for him to come into that bravery, and thats something i think the lion house could help him do. i think he’d look to dimitri for solace similar to how he does with lucina, and dimitri would be very happy to provide that for him. when the timeskip comes and dimitri is lost, i think yarne would have to find it in himself to abandon that anxiety for a bit to come help ease dimitri, sort of repaying him for his initial kindness (read: i want eyepatch scary dimitri to find stress relief in petting a big ass bunny). also i dont need yarne to be in the same house as petra and marianne for him to interact with them. dont worry thats a thing. also if youre a real one you recruit marianne to blue lions everytime. no i dont know how they’d handle bringing a taguel to fodlan i dont really care either

for severa i think, even if she would rather not admit it, justice and loyalty are very key parts of her character. its buried underneath her mean girl attitude and like five pounds of trauma but its there. and what are the blue lions if not loyal knights with very LOUD auras of sadness? she would be similar to felix in terms of their views on knighthood, and obviously her whole thing with cordelia would put her at odds with the whole dying for your king/for glory thing faerghus has going on. similar to cynthia she’d be very critical of faerghus and dimitri except she’d be that way to his face. she doesnt have the same personal beef with him the same way felix would, and might be a little more like how i imagined inigo would be to edelgard, criticism with the better interest of the greater good rather than formed of personal beef. in the end though, i think she would stick with dimitri. also i think she’d have insane sexual tension with ingrid like i dont think theyd like eachother but like. my vision… do you see it.

bradys in lions partially due to mutual influence (hi zorua) but also because i ended up liking his potential with the lions as opposed to the deer or eagles. he’d have a very cute friendship with mercedes and annette i think, playing violin for them and having tea party gossip sessions. i think he and dedue could bond over being kinda scary but doing what they can to ease people’s fear of them. since thats an insecurity for both of them that brady purposefully takes steps to get rid of (ex: him hunching over is so that he can be eye level with children and people shorter with them so as not to come off as intimidating or more powerful) i think brady could help with that. though if im being so real i dont think he would like dimitri. i think he would stay and stick around and help dimitri get better. but i dont think he’d approve of his bloodlust and be very open with his issues in regards to how dimitri handles and carries himself. sorry guys im not meaning to have dimitri catch so many strays here 😭 i love the guy i just also like when theres conflict here i promise

laurent is in the golden deer because i think he and claude would be very like minded people in terms of trying to discover the secrets behind fodlan and what that means and how to better navigate fodlan as uncharted territory. theyre both foreigners, as are all of the second gen kids, but thats something claude keeps under wraps that i think laurent would be able to tell very quickly (not that it was hard. claude doesnt hide it well its just that everyone in fodlan is either stupid or all the smart people are kept away from him) that claude is from almyra. i think this knowledge could help him serve as something of a confidant to claude. obviously he wouldnt tell laurent everything but when claudes supposed closest allies are lorenz (guy who hates him and prays for his downfall) and hilda (girl who is racist and from a racist family) its just like. well maybe claude should have another friend who is normal adjacent at least, and laurents not the type to go blabbing anyways. obviously both lorenz and hilda (eh. well.) get better about their mindsets post timeskip but i think in the time of the academy laurent would be a very valuable friend for claude and vice versa. in general laurent would do well anywhere because i think most of his interest would be with the technological and scientific advancements of fodlan which is flexible, but i think, with rhea purposefully halting progress and claude being the main guy who wants truth above all else, this is the best spot for him. could hear an argument for him going to edelgard (potential recruit out of house recruit fs) but i do like him with claude a bit more. gerolau angst also.

lucina is in golden deer because i dont want her in the other two houses but also because i do think, similar to laurent, she’d be very valuable to claude and vice versa. awakening world building is horseshit but from what little we do know there is quite a bit of political discourse that lucina probably knows quite a bit about. even if her timeline was thrown into war when she was young, she probably had some form of royal training and can help claude navigate fodlan a little bit. i also think coming to fodlan would just be a very refreshing experience for lucina as the burden of everything is no longer directly on her shoulders, and i think she’d be looking for a broader perspective on life and finding another purpose for herself now that grima is dealt with. i think claude would be able to help her with that and i think she’d be genuinely interested to learn of his homeland once she figures out where hes from (i do think laurent beats her to the conclusion but not by a lot. remember this is lucina aka marth aka woman her disguised her own royal status and was very successful at it. just saying). also while i did say that golden deer is in fact not the meme house, i think they are more light hearted overall in terms of character (does NOT mean meme house or funny house. look me right in my eyes and say the house WITHOUT hubert and linhardt is the meme house. fucking liar) and i think lucina would love that. i want her to get the chance to be silly and childish for a little bit. characters like raphael and marianne and lysithea might help her heal that inner child that she never really got to let out and i just think the golden deer house would be the best place for her

morgan is here because i didnt want her and marc in the same house thats too easy. but while i think claude is the least in need of a tactician type character, him and morgan would be sooooo funny so cute and i need someone who can keep him on his toes. i think he blurts out a plan and morgan goes “ermmm ackchully” and half of the time her rebuttals are complete nonsense she just wants to argue. i think they both enjoy it. i also think, similar to lucina, a light hearted house would be a little better for her. shes much more prone to mischief than m!morgan is i think and i think the deer would benefit from that if only so she can target lorenz and make me laugh. i also think separating the twins would make for fantastic angst down in the timeskip but for now shes just hanging out having fun being a piece of shit. #girl also i think its funnier if one morgan is absolutely thriving and the other is barely keeping his shit together and by god it is way funnier if its f!morgan getting away with everything

noire is here because. i. could not think of a reason for her to go anywhere else! i thought about putting her in beagles but i dont think making that choice between the church and edelgard would be as interesting for her? and i dont think putting her in lions would do anything for her. i think the best lord and the best house at helping her through her issues and being understanding of her mood changes is probably claude and the deer. i could see hilda and leonie reaching out to her, or ignatz and her getting on pretty well, but im not quite sure on the specifics of that. my least thought out placement but also it doesnt matter because it keeps the placements balanced to put her here. i’ll have to give this one more thought…

anyways if you can believe it this is the cutdown version. i know right. i hope i didnt forget anyone that would be really embarrassing

[footygirl114]

Cargador (Alexia Putellas X Reader) Version 2

Hello Friends!! I have a fun version of choose your own ending for part 2 to Suspirando!! They both have the same opening scene, however the rest of the story is different, one is very fluffy and one is angsty. I am posting them both and you can decide which one your in the mood for! I owed someone 2 fics and this is the way I decided to reward them :)

This one is the angsty one! Beware!! First scene is the same in both versions!

The only thing running through your mind when you take off from the cafe after your display of admiration is you need to get away from there. You almost couldn’t believe what just happened, did you really just defend Alexia to the ex she’s trying to get back with? What were you thinking. 

Almost on cue your phone rings, and you let go of the breathe you were holding when you realise it is Leah calling. 

“Hola captain!” you greet her when you pick up the phone slowing down to a walk. 

“Hey hey! How’s it going?” she asks you. 

Her timing could not have been better as you say “I may have just done something stupid?” 

You can hear the disappointment in her voice as she asks “uh oh what did you do now?” 

“hey I am normally good!” you defend yourself. 

“two words Y/N, fake girlfriend” she argues back with a laugh. 

You groan and cant help but let out a chuckle as you tell her “fair enough Leah” 

“So what did you do this time?” she asks you. 

At this point you had walked to the water, and find a patch of beach close enough that you can hear the waves while you tell her what happened. “I ran into Alexia’s ex at a coffee shop” you tell her.

“And?” 

“well she was saying some not so nice things about Ale, and I couldn’t just stand there and let her Leah.” Knowing you needed to get it all out before Leah interrupted you power through and say “I defended her, about how amazing she is, and how she’s an idiot for treating Alexia the way she is. I let my feelings out Leah.” You can feel the tears gathering in the corners of your eyes as you finish and you turn to look up at the sky to prevent them from falling. 

She gives you a moment before she says “Y/N you know that you couldn’t keep them in for long, I know you and I know you feel everything deeply. Hearing her talk down on Alexia would have definitely set you off, and I’m glad it did, maybe now shell think twice before she hurts her again.” 

“It was bad, she was talking about how she was only with her to help her image and all this stuff, It made me feel gross knowing that I’m basically doing the same thing” you tell her feeling a bit defeated. 

“Hey no, Y/N thats not what you’re doing at all. You are just being there for Alexia, yeah its a little unorthodox but you are doing what you can to help your friend out. There is no shame in that, where there’s tons of shame in her only being with alexia to help her image” You smile at the conviction you can hear in Leah’s voice knowing she is probably right. 

“Thank you for listening to me” you tell her with a small smile. 

“anytime” she says and adds on “Want to know what I think this means?” 

“of course” 

“well I think now that you know she’s like this, it’s time you put on your grown up pants and told the girl how you feel. You can’t let her go back to that Y/N, plus I don’t think you’ll be able to keep the feelings in now that you’ve let them out.” She tells you softly. 

Taking a moment to think it over before you respond you tell her “You might be right, but I think I am going to unplug tonight and sleep on it” 

She laughs and asks “did you lose your charger again?” 

“It was one time, Leah get over it” you laugh back at her.

She laughs and says “One time per break but whatever. I think it’s a good idea to unplug though, will you call me tomorrow after training?”

“Of course I will, thanks for calling, and for the record I haven’t lost my charger, I am just letting my phone die on purpose.” You tell her with a laugh.

“sure Y/N, have a good night!” she tells you. 

“you too!” 

You hang up and start to walk back to your place, turning you phone off as you go. You already have plans to binge tv and pass out early tonight. 

****************

Walking in to training the following morning, you had a spring in your step. The conversation you had with Leah the night before as well as the night unplugged, kinda on purpose kinda cause you did lose your charger again, really made you realised that you needed to finally confess to Alexia how you feel about her. Walking into the training centre you were very excited and a bit nervous, but the excitement outweighed the nervousness. 

Walking into the team’s change room you were a bit distracted, immediately looking to search out Alexia. What you missed was Mapi trying to grab your attention. As you walk towards Alexia you know you need to get it off your chest before you lose your nerve. 

Walking up with a small smile on your face she notices you and turns and smiles and says “Y/N! You don’t answer your phone?” 

You stop in front of her and shake your head as you tell her “Sorry I lost my charger” 

“Again?” she says with a smile. 

Nodding you agree and tell her “Ale can we talk?” standing there nervously waiting for her answer.

“Of course, but first can I tell you my news?” she says.  

Nodding again you tell her “of course Ale.” You know that she won’t be able to focus on you if she has something on her mind, and you know you want her full attention for what you have to say. 

“So I met her at a cafe yesterday” you can feel your stomach drop and your body heat, unsure where there is going as she continues “we had a coffee and chatted. I am going to go meet her for dinner tonight, but I think this is it Y/N” she says as she excitedly grabs your forearm. 

“Really?” you ask her with a sense of disbelief not believing your ears.

She nods excitedly as she continues “yes! I am so happy you helped me with this Y/N, but It really worked and she wants me back!” 

You stand there feeling your stomach drop more, as you wait for someone to jump out and tell you its a prank. You wait for too long as you hear her ask “Y/N?” but you cant respond your mouth feels dry and like you are going to throw up. 

You have your eyes cast downward so you don’t notice Mapi walk up, but you feel her stand beside you and hear her say to Alexia “Coach needs you on the field ASAP Ale.” 

“Oh shoot, I forgot and got distracted. Are you sure your good Y/N?” she asks as she turns and grabs her stuff from the locker behind her. 

You nod still not able to speak as Mapi tells her “don’t worry Ale, I’ll make sure she’s not late and we will plug her phone in” she finishes with a laugh. 

Alexia agrees and laughs and as she’s walking out she turns and adds on “we can talk about what you needed to tell me later, yeah?” and waits for the nod from you then continues out the door. 

You are stood there frozen still not believing your ears even after she walked out. It takes Mapi nudging you and guiding you to sit at your locker before you shake out of the trance. When you do you turn to Mapi and ask “Is today a full team or position training?” 

“Its a positional one, we will be at one end and the forwards and attacking mids at the other” she says with a small smile knowing you need to hear that. 

Nodding you turn and get changed and notice Mapi waiting as you tell her “You don’t need to wait for me” 

“I want to, I know Y/N” she says. 

You smile and say “come over after training?” 

“Of course, now get changed and give me your phone to plug in” she says with a laugh. 

You hand it over and give her a small smile, as you know that she will make sure you do not have to deal with Alexia alone. 

**

Luckily the defenders finished training before the attackers so you and Mapi were able to sneak out before Alexia could catch up. You knew she wouldn’t be coming by tonight but to be on the safe side you both ended up at Mapi’s place. After cracking open a bottle of wine, you both settled on her balcony. 

“So do you want to tell me what happened at the cafe? or do you want to tell me why the heck you pretended to date her?” she starts out. 

You let out a laugh and ask “you knew?” 

“of course I knew” she says and she sits forward closer to you and says “Y/N I know you, I know you have been crushing on Ale for months. I could tell it wasn’t real, you would have been over the moon Y/N.” 

You give her a small smile and tell her “It was the worst Maps, I got a taste of her and what it would be like to be with her, and now its been ripped out from under me.” As you finish you can feel the tears gathering in the corner of your eyes. 

“Oh Y/N, I am so sorry” she says and she reaches over and grabs your hand. 

You turn your head up to the sky to prevent the tears as you tell her “yesterday I ran into the ex at a cafe, and she was saying some nasty stuff about how she’s only with Ale for the fame, and for the image and status.” You sit forward and look at her as you tell her “you know me Mapi, You know I would never stand for that, so I defended her. Talked about how stupid she was and how amazing Ale is.” 

She smiles and squeezes your hand before letting go to pour more wine into your glass as she asks “did Alexia hear that?” 

Shrugging your shoulders you tell her “I took off when I was finished. I called Leah and she convinced me that I needed to tell her how I felt, that it was time. I was going to this morning, then she dropped the bomb about her getting back together.” 

“God Y/N, I hate the ex, I have always hated the hold she has on Ale and now how she’s hurt you” she says. “what do you want to do now?” 

You let out a small laugh and say “same as I always did, admire from a far.” 

She laughs with you and says “well for what it’s worth, Alexia is an idiot.” 

“Maybe she is, maybe it’s me for wanting someone I cannot have.” you tell her sadly. 

Before she can respond the back door slides open and Ingrid walks out with a small bag and an empty wine glass, “room for one more?” 

Mapi grabs the wine to pour as Ingrid hands you the bag, you look at her confused and ask her “what’s this?” 

She laughs and says “Maps says you need it” as she sits on the chair on the other side of Mapi. 

You look at them both questionably and open the bag to reveal a new charger for you phone, they both let out a laugh and you give them the finger as you say “thank you.” 

**

The following day you decide to go into the training grounds a bit early, wanting to hit up the gym and run on the treadmill. You walk in distracted by a text from Leah, on your fully charged phone, and when you pause to answer outside the locker room door, you hear the raised voices. 

“Stay out of it, it’s none of your business.” Alexia’s is the first voice you pick out as she continues her argument “I can date who ever I want and it us not up to you to tell me.” 

“It is when you are making a massive mistake, Alexia she is only with you for the fame and to help her image. Don’t tell me you can’t see it, you were just telling me how she was with you last night, how you didn’t like how you felt like her trophy.” Mapi argues back. 

“thats for me to worry about not you.” Alexia says back.

You know you need to walk in as you cannot eavesdrop any longer, you go to open the door but before you can you hear Mapi’s response “It’s for me to worry about when you are hurting one of my favourite people Alexia.” 

“what are you talking about?” Alexia asks her with a confused tone.

“don’t pretend Alexia, I know you are smarter than that, and I know you aren’t blind to Y/N. You have to know what is going through her head about you.” Mapi tells her back. 

“Mapi I don’t, care to enlighten me?” she says. 

“Ale seriously? If you cant tell that she’s in love with you, then you really are an idiot” Mapi tells her in an incredulous tone. 

You can’t let this go on any longer so you push the door open and walk in as Alexia says “no, thats not possible. She’s like a sister to me” 

Pausing in front of them when they both turn to you Mapi immediately says “Y/N I am sorry” 

All you can do is stand there hearing what Alexia just said. You never knew what it would feel like to have your heart broken but you think this was it. 

[redundantz]

What are your thoughts on how the characters were written for stampede? You sounded kind of :/ about Meryl at one point.

Hello! Yeah it was a bit of a rollercoaster for me personally. ⚠ STAMPEDE SPOILERS ⚠ BUT they really pulled it together in the end i think (for the most part) Since we now know for sure this is a prequel and where its now going after the finale it puts more perspective on things. I have OG Trigun brain so take my own opinions with a grain of salt. I think if people enjoy this new series on its own merits thats wonderful. HOWEVER I still think the series has severe pacing issues and we miss a ton of important character moments imo. And I wish we got to see more interaction with uhh actual humans. After the first 3 eps and then the one with Rollo we basically dont interact with any other humans who live on the planet and its so weird. (also my god we need more fun time in this show was a depression speedrun istg) Have a graph of my emotional journey:

Vash: oh man haha this one is tough. now that the season is over and we got a HUGE payoff with him so I am very happy now but yeahhh. Some parts I was like wow this is Vash he's perfect. But then as the episodes went on I was getting so frustrated. Because he just would stand there giving everyone UwU eyes and not do anything. Especially for his flashback with Knives. Which I understand it was "shock" but he basically stood there with a blank expression the whole time and it was so...??? Being a pacifist didn't mean he is a limp noodle and doesn't take action. Like don't get me wrong he did have a few moments where he fought Livio and the Badlads but that was about it. I think a lot of my frustration might be because he kept using hand to hand combat compared to using his gun which I am used to. again though, they really brought it back in the end 10000% and brought it into perspective so I can forgive some of the previous stuff. Meryl: She was made more cutesy and naïve. Which definitely got on my nerves here and there. But I was okay with it for the most part ( im not immune to cute lol) They got the most important part of her character where she is touched by Vash's convictions, and his love for humanity. She didn't start off jaded and roughened by the planet this time so I think it has a bit less impact in that regard. But I think the best thing they did for her is she is basically the stand in ambassador for humanity and its strength of character. Wolfwood: I don't have to much to say for him personally. but dude needs to have some fun. First ep with him was pretty great but after that was just a lot of angry yelling and nasty looks. Like...for awhile I couldnt even see how him and Vash are friends besides the fact that Vash is nice to him. Him and Meryl almost had more nice moments than both of them. I LOVED finally getting to see more of his backstory though esp with Livio that was so great. But I really wish we got to see how much he cares about kids and him interacting with them. All we would get is NOT THE ORPHANAGE!! but we never get to see it in action really. Besides him giving Zazie a lollypop that one time and the flashbacks but those only included Livio for the most part. Roberto: NGL I loved him he was cynical and grumpy LOL I was pretty offput at first because it felt like he was replacing Milly. I dont think he wasnt really utilized to his full potential though. Especially because he dies later. I feel like we didnt get enough time with him or character moments. I think it could have made his death hit harder. Also just a shame that he was just there to further Meryls arc. But i think he was meant to mirror Meryls drive to help against his pessimism. Milly: millyseason2millyseason2millyseason2!! That's the main group anyway. Thank you for the ask!

[nouvomond]

“ tell  me  what  you  want. “ sanji 😇

He'd gone to great lengths to set everything up before the big night. After all, it wasn't often that Nami would actually agree to spending the evening alone with him. As far as he was concerned, there was no way this could possibly have been anything but a date between the two of them. And if that was the case, then she didn't just deserve him at his best. She deserved everything at it's best.

Another blessing just so happened to be that the Strawhats had made landfall on a rather captivating island. Which made for the perfect backdrop to a beautiful evening. He discovered a nice, quiet spot near the beachside where the two could waste the hours away, simply enjoying each other's company. As well as the obligatory, extravagant dinner he had decided to grace her with.

He tried his best to keep his more.. expressive behavioral traits in check. But it was just too hard to hold back the occasional swoon and far too descriptive compliment he was prone to throwing her way whenever he found himself in that 'lovestruck fool' type of mood. Sanji hadn't expected anything beyond the two having fun that night. Just knowing thats he enjoyed herself would have been enough for him.

But then, came that question. Almost entirely out of the blue. For a moment he couldn't help but think he'd had a little too much wine, which caused his imagination to start running away from him. But no. This was real. Those radiant, gem-like eyes were staring right at him in an almost expectant manner. And though his mind had whipped itself into a chaotic frenzy of nervousness and excitement, his voice had never been clearer. Nor had it carried any more conviction.

❝ .. There's only one thing I've ever wanted. ❞

'ˢᵃᵃᵃᵃᵃᵃᵃᵃᵃᵃᵃᵃᵃᵃᵃᵃᵃᵃᵃᵃᵃᵃᵃᵃ⁻'

His hands slowly reaches out for her own, before his fingers curl gently into her own. If this was how it was going to be, then he'd hold nothing back. Today, finally, he'd tell her every single thing he'd felt. Beyond simple flattery and expressions of attraction. He would lay his heart bare for her. And express his love in the truest sense!

❝ Nami.. I want-- ❞

'ᵃᵃᵃᵃᵃᵃᵃaaaaaAAANNNNNJIIIIIIIIIIIII!'

At that very moment, Luffy pierced through the night like a comet and crashed directly into Sanji's chest, knocking the cook out cold from the blunt force trauma. Sanji may have tried to ensure he found somewhere where the others wouldn't find them, but there was no hiding the smell of food from Luffy's nose!

'Sanj, were you cooking stuff in secret for us?! You're such a great guy! Oh, hey, Nami's here too!'

Alas. So close,and yet so far.

[tomato-puppy]

reading about other people's cute relationship moments is truly painful.

like, i stopped caring about being in any kind of commited relationship after the disaster that was year 2018 for me. It was really like... I just lost any conviction that this was a situation that works out well for me. It's obvious I'm never in the headspace where I can take care of other people anymore, that I'm really not always emotionally present and that I often don't want to be physically present. I just wanted to dedicate any of the energy I had to try to make my own life better.

But it was too late. I was spiraling out of control and then in 2019, bang, burnout, completely fucking dysfunctional, lost all objectivity and mental stability. And it's only moderately improved since. and with how hard the road has been to recover, and with the weird relationship that happened between me and my last ex, I just kind of stopped thinking about it. Like, there was no more future for me to look forward to. I didn't matter if anyone would or wouldn't be in it.

Now I'm contemplating my failure to properly take care of my needs or to give life to any of my aspirations. I succeeded in becoming just functional enough to be exploitable in the workforce. Nothing else. And having lost whatever I had going for me before 2019, being well enough to want to socialize but having no ability to do so, my thoughts come back to the whole relationship/partnership thing.

It's lost to me. Just like my ability to be creative, and my sense of wonder that I still had bits and pieces of. I'm not a person I would have dated, or befriended. Perhaps I would have wanted to out of pity, but relationships built on pitying the other are not a healthy or fulfilling thing.

Yeah thats the word - fulfilling. I think all relationships fulfill some kind of need or desire or yearning or whatever. And I've nothing to give to anyone. I don't even have anything to give myself.

Now that I'm this broken, I find myself yearning for another. Some kind of closeness, Intimacy, familiarity. Tell me about your day, about the things that excite you, that drive you. Tell me the things that hurt or scare you. Be yourself with me so that I can be myself with y-

wait. no. cant do that, remember? how can I be myself if I'm not sure who that person is, and when I do know, my reaction to this guy is to hate him with a visceral and violent rage filling my lungs? Is this the person you want others to meet?? is this who you secretly hope someone might fall in love with?! LMAO you're pathetic. You can't remember who you were before anymore, and you've no idea who you'd want to be... you don't even know what to call yourself. you literally don't have a name anymore, remember? you took it off because it didn't fit well, like all these other skins I ts you've worn in the past....

who are you? who is this looking back from the mirror? who is it that you think you could be in other people's lives?

nobody is going to infodump to you. nobody is going to kiss you. nobody will cry on your shoulder. nobody to laugh with. because you're nobody in other's lives. you took this away from yourself.

go on. Go to the bathroom. turn the lights off. Look into the glass. DON'T. LOOK. AWAY. lock your gaze with it. remember when you were a kid and you would get lost staring into the eyes of dogs and cats? remember that one dog? remember the feeling you got when it felt like you were falling from up higu into a dark pit inside her pupils??? this is it. this is what you're looking it. you made yourself this. the thing staring at you from the mirror is the creature you wanted to be all those years ago. you made it, Vlad. why aren't you glad? why aren't you happy?? is it because you didn't think about how stripping yourself of the things you claimed tainted you, you would also tear away the distinction between it and you???

it's too bad. this thing looking at you, you could lose yourself in it's eyes. Just like that dog all those years ago. you're so much alike now. only the thing you created is hostile to you and you're stuck here alone with it... and you cannot have anyone come over because you're afraid that they will see it too

you will watch other people live the lives you dreamt you could before you took an axe to the life you've built by then. you will suffer because you cannot reach out and touch the humanity you long for. you will wither away and die in solitude because you cannot break out of this cycle. but hey, you're not all alone.

this thing will be in here with you, until the end.

[kurozu501]

Final Rhine lab manga chapter even addressed whether or not saria was going to stab ifrit in that moment with the knife and ended on an emotional conversation between her and silence, this manga really did give us everything.

[egcdeath]

checkmate

summary: you’ve always refused to lose, and love was no exception. (gone girl-ish au)

pairing(s): ransom drysdale x dark!reader, a special mystery guest ;) 

word count: 3.7k

warnings: 18+ because of heavy themes! faked death, framing of crimes, manipulation, alluding to sex, alluding to cheating, terrible relationship dynamic, very loose usage of the word crazy/psychotic, implied mention of self harm, brief choking & slapping (in a non sexual way lol), pregnancy trapping (idk if thats the right term), the reader is a very bad human being, overuse of italics  *please let me know if i’m missing any warnings!

author’s note: this is my 2nd submission for @stargazingfangirl18’s 5k soft dark challenge, i decided to make the reader dark >:) but ransom is also not a good person. I used these prompts: “I’ve waited a long time for this, sweetheart.” & The town golden *girl isn’t as sweet as everyone thinks.

this is definitely the most unhinged thing i’ve ever written, but blame @literate-lamb for making me write this because when i pitched this to her and said that i’d probably never write it, she enabled me. 

okay that's enough from me. join my taglist if you want :D

“I know women whose entire personas are woven from a benign mediocrity. Their lives are a list of shortcomings: the unappreciative boyfriend, the extra ten pounds, the dismissive boss, the conniving sister, the straying husband. I've always hovered above their stories, nodding in sympathy and thinking how foolish they are, these women, to let these things happen, how undisciplined. And now to be one of them! One of the women with the endless stories that make people nod sympathetically and think: Poor dumb bitch.” Gillian Flynn, Gone Girl

Your whole life, you’d considered yourself a competitive person. Constantly overcompensating for one thing or another, whether it was the chronic desire to achieve perfection that had been installed in you since you were a little girl, or your persistent internalized sense of inadequacy. You realized early on that it was much better for you to win than for you to lose, no matter the physical, emotional, or mental cost of the prize of perfection.

For the most part, this mindset worked out for you. You graduated as Valedictorian from your high school, neared the top of your graduating class at Harvard. God knew you earned it, all those tears you shed into overpriced textbooks, all the popping of unprescribed Adderall, and robbing yourself of the parties and social events that the rest of your peers gladly indulged in. 

You were just different, which was why you gained a job nearly immediately after your exit from school, quickly climbing to the top at the Blood Like Wine publishing company after only a few years of being there. 

And one night, at the party celebrating the release of A Thousand Knives when you laid your eyes on Hugh Ransom Drysdale, the grandson of your boss, you knew that you needed to have him. Rich, hot, a bit of an asshole. You deserved to finally complete your image, and that socialite flavored eye candy seemed to fit the part perfectly. Luckily for you, he was desperate. It only took a few tugs on your dress’ V-line, and a number of knowing smirks to find yourself being finger-banged in his family manor’s bathroom.

From there, you wormed your way into his life. Leaving belongings at his place as an excuse to come back, and offering booty calls in the middle of the night. Ransom must’ve been much more desperate than you originally thought, as it really only seemed to take one night of stroking his hair while he vented about his family to make him want to be with you. Men with mommy issues were always so easy. 

Except, he wasn’t that easy. The longer you got to know Ransom, the more fucked up you realized he really was. He had no boundaries at all, became jealous and enraged at the drop of a pin, and occasionally told you things that made the hairs on your arms rise. 

This of course all came to a head after the night of Harlan’s 85th birthday party. When the news broke of his tragic death, you’d immediately known it was the works of your Hugh. If your intuition wasn’t enough, his confession in the shower, where he’d demanded you take off your clothes to display that you were without a bug, certainly was. 

You were completely devastated. The man that you’d invested so much into for years had thrown both his and your reputations down the drain in just a matter of hours. Of course, you felt bad for Harlan too. He was a good guy (when he wasn’t instigating a family fight).

Still, you showed up during the funeral in your best mourning clothes and dawning your biggest crocodile tears. You rubbed Linda’s back while she mourned the loss of her father, and the new truth about her husband. You played dumb when interrogated by some Southern private investigator, even giving Ransom an airtight alibi. You testified on his behalf in court with enough conviction to grant you an Emmy. 

You’d gotten so far, devoted so much energy into him, that you simply refused to lose now. 

To your friends, you’d seemed to lead a near perfect life. Dream job, dreamy boyfriend, dream bank account, but it wasn’t enough. You wanted more, you just didn’t know what. 

It dawned on you while sipping mimosas at the country club, Ransom playing tennis with his friends just a few yards away from you while Danielle showed off her brand new engagement ring, a .59 Carat Asscher Diamond, that if you heard her speak of again, would probably make you lose your shit.

You zoned out as she droned on and on about the shape, and how Matt proposed to her in their own private room in one of the most exclusive Parisian restaurants, instead focusing on how you could find yourself in the same position as that airhead next to you. In all honesty, you couldn’t stand the idea that someone was doing better than you, let alone someone in your own social circle. Dani got all the bragging rights of being engaged to the heir of some tech giant, being the first in your friend group to get eloped, and worst of all, Matt wasn’t even making her sign a prenup. 

You blankly watched Ransom from afar, taking occasional sips from your sweet drink, while you thought of how you deserved all of that and more, and you were going to get it one way or another. 

——

It didn’t take much to come up with something, your first and most obvious plan being to simply ask Ransom when he was going to propose to you. Of course, this wasn’t the first time you’d tried to approach him about this subject, you just wondered if maybe this time things would be different.

Panting heavily after a rather rough night in bed, you rolled off of your boyfriend’s chest and gave him a messy, yet sincere kiss. You knew your man well, and if there was any time to pop the question, it was in his post-nut haze.

“Baby,” you said breathily, “I wanna ask you something.”

“Shoot,” he responded casually, glancing over at you. 

“When’re you gonna propose to me?” you hummed.

Ransom groaned and shook his head, rolling his eyes, “this is about Matt and Dani, huh?” he tutted, then extended a hand out to your warm cheeks so he could gently caress one with his thumb. “Thought we agreed marriage is just a piece of paper and it’s stupid.”

You huffed in response.

Of fucking course.

“I never said that,” you muttered, setting a hand on his broad chest. “Besides, it’ll be good if you get pissed and decide to like, kill your dad or something. Y’know, spouses don’t have to testify against each other in court.”

Ransom chuckled as if this whole thing was funny, like your feelings were some kind of sick joke to him. “You know my lawyers, babe. They could prove that bees don’t make honey. That bears don’t shit in the forest. I appreciate your attempt, though. This has been some really nice pillow talk.” 

“Whatever,” you muttered, pinching his nipple in retaliation before turning your back to him and yanking the blanket onto your side. 

You weren’t sure why you were so surprised that he was being stubborn, most of the time you felt like you were pulling teeth from the man. But that’s why you had a backup plan! You always had a backup plan. That’s what separated you from your boyfriend. Where Ransom was extemporized and impulsive, you were calculating and prudent. 

Although you devised your plan that very afternoon while watching your partner backhand small green balls, you were going to need some time to get everything in order, to prove Murphy and his stupid law wrong in making sure that everything that could go wrong wouldn’t. 

After all, love was a game. And you sure as hell weren’t losing to Hugh Drysdale. 

——

You sacrificed too much to have your plans ruined by some trust fund baby with impulsivity issues. You deserved your dream marriage, the stability you wished you had as a child. You wanted the white picket fence, and everything that came along with it. Your desire to be the best, to be perfect was what drove you to poke holes in every condom in the box, what led you to draw liters of your own blood in hopes of staging a fake crime scene, to buy a cheap getaway car and burner phone off of Craigslist, and reach out to a high school boyfriend who you knew was in a position as desperate as you. 

You planted seeds of doubt in your friends throughout the following weeks, feeding them lies about Ransom’s behavior, how you were afraid of telling him that you did in fact see two faint red lines on that damn plastic stick– only half of the statement truly being false–, telling them that he was behaving erratically lately.

It all was going without a hitch. Ransom didn’t seem to notice anything was off, despite your frequent visits to the bathroom and newfound affinity for true crime documentaries. 

You almost felt guilty, knowing the world of pain you were about to throw the man into. Granted, he deserved the pain. You were in a relationship with a genuinely terrible person, and that person had made a conscious effort not to commit to you. You tried to make this easy for him, give him a chance to say a few words to you and slide a ring on your finger, but no, he always seemed to take the hard route.

You slept like a baby the night before you were setting your plan in action. You made sure to uphold the facade of everything being fine, making Ransom a nice breakfast before sending him halfway across town to the hardware store with an oddly incriminating list.

Once he was out of the house, you hurried off to the fridge in the garage where you’d been keeping a small stash of your own blood. It wasn’t pretty, but it had to be done. You poured the blood throughout the kitchen, splattering bits of it on the counters and cupboards. You poorly cleaned the mess, just as he would.

You put your next move in motion, falsifying a home invasion. You tossed over a table and some chairs, throwing books and photos onto the floor, but left some aspects slightly untouched, like an upright picture frame to give yet another hint that things were not exactly what they appeared. 

You left a tiny blue post-it note on the nightstand of Ransom’s side of the bed, a quick and simple doodle of a ring along with the first initial of your name inked onto the tiny piece of paper. 

With that, you were off. Technically missing, soon-to-be presumed dead.

----

 The days following your disappearance had gone even better than you’d initially planned. Local news coverage had been all over you, search and rescue groups were assiduously looking for you, your parents had opened a tip line, and begged for you to get home safe on news segments. But the best part of it all was that Ransom had been briefly found himself in police custody, only to be released shortly thereafter. His past of an accused murder quickly made your disappearance even more of a national story, and you watched the whole thing unravel from the safety and comfort of your high school boyfriend, Andy Barber’s Newton home. 

Of course, you fed him the same lies you’d given to your friends, and seeing the rather lonely position he was in, he gladly let you stay with him. You were absolutely having a hay-day with it all, dedicating hours of your day to watching Ransom slowly unravel. Maybe it was a bit sadistic of you to enjoy torturing your partner so much, but he needed to learn his lesson. You deserved better. You needed Ransom to rise up to your level, allowing you to finally complete your image. To let you two appear to be the perfect couple. Really, this was all on him.

Andy, for the most part, had been a good host. He was gone for the majority of the day, dedicating himself to his work while you lounged around on his dangerously cozy couch. Around two weeks into your stay, you were sharing a box of pizza in the living room with your old lover when something interesting on the television caught your eye.

Ransom, broadcasted on CBS, being interviewed on your disappearance. 

You watched with wide eyes as Ransom begged for your return on national television. It was one thing seeing your mother plead for you to come back, the same woman who had installed such toxic behavior in you sob for your return, but Ransom. You’d never loved him more than in that moment.

“Hugh, if you could tell Y/N one thing, what would it be?” the interviewer asked.

Ransom turned, looking straight at the camera, directly into your soul, “Y/N, I love you so much. More than you’ll ever know. I need you to come back safely, to see you, to hold you again. I’d give anything in the world for that right now,” he looked down, a tear falling down his cheek. “I can’t live without you in my life, I-”

His sentence was cut off by Andy grabbing the remote, and turning off the TV. You turned your head and frowned deeply at him.

“Why’d you do that?” you asked with a bit of a pout.

“I just couldn’t stand listening to him talk about you like he hasn’t treated you like shit for the past few years. C’mon, let’s get ready for bed.”

Your blood boiled. Andy was once a means to an end, but now he was interfering. He was clearly much too selfish to see that you and Ransom were quite obviously soulmates. A match made in hell. 

You followed him to bed regardless, curling up on what had been your side of the bed for the past few days, and staring at the wall until Andy’s breaths moved from a soft and rhythmic pattern to loud snores. God, those snores were obnoxious. 

You slipped out of bed and to his dresser, grabbing two soft ties from the drawer, and daintily tying his wrists to each side of the bedpost.

“What‘re you doing?” he mumbled, instinctively yanking both of his wrists as he awoke.

“I’m going back home,” you whispered.

“You can’t be serious,” Andy huffed, tugging on the restraint attached to the headboard.

You shook your head, “I am.”

“I should’ve known. Why would you do something like this? Do you know how much trouble you’ll be in with the law?”

“Do you know how much trouble you’ll be in when the world finds out that you kidnapped me?” you retorted.

This threat seemed to wake him up right away, “what about this was kidnapping? I gave you a nice home, fed you, I didn’t even make a pass at you. I didn’t do shit to you,” he hissed. “You think I can’t prove that? I’m a lawyer, for god's sake!”

You nearly laughed, “Okay, Andy,” you paused for a moment, “As a lawyer, who do you think everyone’ll believe? Someone who the world was on a wild goose chase for in the last two weeks? Or the man with a family history of violence? Must I remind you that your father and your son have killed people?”

Andy shook his head, face pinched in sorrow at the mention of his deceased son, clearly a low blow. “You’re insane,” he muttered.

“Swear to god that you won’t tell a soul what happened here,” you leaned over him, getting right in his face. “Or I promise, Andrew Barber, I will ruin you. You’ll spend the rest of your life behind bars, or disbarred, or whatever the hell I decide to do with you. So keep your goddamn lips shut.” 

You pulled away and he solemnly nodded, not bothering to put up a fight. You loosened the fabric around his left wrist and walked out of the room. You picked up the keys to Andy’s Audi on your way out, checking the time as you adjusted the driver's seat. 

9:45 PM. Fatherhood really changed the man.

You pushed that thought aside and began your drive home, which turned out to be a surprisingly short trip. When you pulled up in front of your home, you were met with a slew of reporters outside of the house, along with a police car that seemed to be permanently camped there.

As you slowly got out of the car, a gasp, followed by a loud silence fell across the crowd. You limped for dramatic effect up the driveway as cameras followed you, and glanced back at them pathetically. From your peripheral view, you noticed the officers get out of their vehicle.

You finally got to your door, ringing the doorbell and waiting. You blinked harshly a few times, conjuring up the tears you needed to really make a spectacle of the event. After a few minutes, Ransom opened the door, eyes widening as he looked at you. He stepped out, and you wrapped him in as big of a hug as you could manage, genuinely missing his embrace. It was possible that you even let out a few real tears in the moment.

Your emotional embrace was interrupted by the man you recognized as Lieutenant Elliott, the same officer who’d been assigned to Harlan’s case. 

“Ma’am,” he began, only to be shut down by you. 

“Please, just let me be with my boyfriend,” you pleaded, crocodile tears streaming down your face as you spoke with the officer. You still needed time to get your story straight.

“Just give us the night, Lieutenant. We’ll come in first thing tomorrow morning,” Ransom added, furrowing his brows at the officer that he’d come into contact with far too many times. 

He looked to his partner, who shrugged, then to you, “enjoy your night.”

Cameras flashed around you as civilians, journalists, and newscasters alike attempted to catch your attention. You grabbed Ransom’s hand and dramatically pulled him inside, insincerely attempting to hide your face by ducking and covering half of your face with your arm. 

As soon as you were in the privacy of your own home, Ransom threw you against a wall. 

“Why. The fuck. Would you pull a stunt like that,” he hissed through gritted teeth, eyes wild, and a hand around your throat. 

You whimpered as he tightened his grip, rage clearly flowing through his system uncontrollably.

“Do you know what you did to me? You almost had me thrown in fucking jail. Do you understand that?”

You nodded weakly, “Ran,” you whispered, “the baby,” you glanced down at your stomach.

He paused, dropping his grip on your neck and staring at you in awe, “no…” 

You nodded again. 

“How…? You told me you were on the pill… You- you made me use protection…”

“Surprise?” you said weakly. 

“You’re a psychotic bitch.”

“I’m your psychotic bitch. And no child of mine will be born out of wedlock,” you taunted. 

“That’s what this is about?” Ransom laughed manically. “You did this all because I won’t fucking marry you?”

You didn’t even have to respond.

“I should send you to the loony bin right fucking now.”

“What happened to all those things you said to me on TV?”

“You’re fucking delusional. I can’t do this.”

“Yes, you can. And you will. I’ve had to put up with you and your stupid little antics for way too long. How do you think I felt when you killed your own grandfather?”

Ransom scoffed, throwing his hands up in exasperation, “you are so fucked up.”

“I’m the fucked up one? You killed your own blood in cold blood! You’re unhinged!” 

“You faked your own death for attention, and got pregnant while doing it! Is that baby even mine?”

“The fuck are you trying to say, Hugh?”

“I asked if it’s even mine.”

“Really. You’re accusing me of cheating on you. That’s rich considering Mia, Layla, and whoever the fuck else. You’re being ridiculous.”

“I’m being ridiculous? You couldn’t have a normal adult conversation with me!”

“Are you kidding me? I asked you time after time to marry me and it was always some bullshit excuse!” you wagged a finger in his face as you spoke. “Oh, commitment scares me, oh, marriage is just a piece of paper, oh-“ you mocked his voice in a deeper tone before you were cut off by the sting of his hand against your cheek.

“Can you shut the hell up?” he growled at you as you held your own cheek, before you reached out and slapped him back, “I can’t believe that I’m stuck with such a deranged bitch for the rest of my life.”

“Maybe work on your vows a little, dear. I don’t think that those words are as charming to me as they’d be to the rest of our family and friends.”

“You can’t be serious,” he groaned.

“But I am,” you hummed, rubbing your cheek softly once again. “Look at how fast your life fell apart without me here. How quickly the public turned on you. Imagine how upset they’d be if you left me. I love you, Ran. I really do. You and I are perfect for each other, can’t you see that now?”

Ransom took a step away from you, pacing slowly in front of you. He ran a stressed hand through his hair, and took a long and drawn out breath, clearly at a loss for words.

“So when should we have the wedding? I’ve always wanted a Spring wedding, and I know it’s a little short notice, but I don’t want to be showing too much in my wedding dress,” you grabbed Ransom’s bicep gently, as if you were just having a regular old day with him, as if you hadn’t been choked and slapped moments ago. “But we can make it work. We always make it work, right?”

Your now fiancé stared vacantly at the wall ahead of him, giving you a slow, empty nod of agreement. 

“It’s settled then,” you smirked. “I’ll start looking at venues. You find me a nice ring, okay Honey? One that puts all those other bitches’ rings to shame,” you sighed pleasantly to yourself, “I’ve waited a long time for this, sweetheart.”

You pressed a soft kiss to his cheek before hurrying up the stairs and into your bedroom. You heard a distant shriek of  “fuck,” from Ransom, but you truly could not care less. 

You hopped into bed, grabbing your laptop from its charger and promptly opening it. You couldn’t help but to smile at your own reflection on the empty black screen. This wasn’t how you imagined your engagement, but you did the impossible. You tied yourself down to Hugh Ransom Drysdale, he went down kicking in screaming, and you were likely in for a lifetime of cheating and resentment, but you did it nonetheless. 

You finally won.  

[bitchfitch]

Because, That's How The Stories Always Go

Count this a prolog, or a self contained tragedy.

An adventuring party lead by the fated hero of this land trecked across the scorched earth beneath the red moonlight. The smell of rot and char and burned blood filled the searing air between the cragly cliff faces. Twisted roots and branches, now more charcoal than wood caught on their clothes and gear as they pushed on ward down this path towards their shared destinies. The cracking and snapping as each delicate piece of destruction as it fell from its trunk joined the marching footsteps through the cinder and ash.

Twisted approximations of people and animals shambled in the distance, barely hidden by the thick, putrid yellow of the sulphurous smog that drifted from cracks in the ground. The Villain's influence burned all around them and twisted the world and everything in it to match his hellish nature.

This was once an idealic place, a sprawling verdant valley with a beautiful white stone castel at its center. That was where the princess, the beautiful and noble future queen of this land, had been sent to keep her safe from the encroaching vile destruction rought at The Demons Kings hands. Only for his forces to have invaded this land and taken her hostage as a putrid bid for power.

They had demanded that the true and righteous king give up the land their bile had seeped into in exchange for his only child's life. In bloody ink and spat words The Villain had threatened to kill her and feed her to the the six eyed bull-wolf monster that stood at his right hand, or crueler yet, to make her the beasts wife, or perhaps even his own if he was feeling particularly mean, if his demented demands were not met.

The Hero and his party trudged onward, ever closer to the center of this plight. To the princess, to her captor, to the Villain of this story. Unbeknownst to them though, their every step was being watched by the burning crows that cawed and croaked overhead, their ruby eyes cutting through the smog to track every step.

---

The Villain watched from within his throne room, the simple dark metal hand mirror that acted as his view to this scene was clutched tight in his white knuckle grip. He kept his sholders square as he watched the march, his face neautral, but he knew what was coming.

His hands shook, his gut turned itself inside out, the fire that ran in his veins seemingly died and left him cold to his very core.

He flicked his wrist to change the view, a final check over of everything he'd built. His people cowered from the path they had suspected the Hero and his party would take, their store rooms were full, their defenses ready. The Villain tried to unclench hks jaw, they were all so scared. They were all in so much danger.

He had to protect them. That was what he promised to do. To keep them safe from a world that scorned their ilk. He had failed so spectacularly. How many had died to protect this infant kingdom? How many had nobly, foolishly, bravely, stood between The Hero and The Villain? How many had been slain? How many would be in the aftermath of this? Would there be another cull? How many parents would live just long enough to see their children die?

They were in danger, and it was his fault. He wasn't strong enough, or clever enough. He wasn't enough to keep them safe.

But, maybe, just maybe he could buy them time. Allow another fire wrought ruler to take his place as protector. To keep them all alive just a little bit longer.

A hand, Heavy and bulky rested on his shoulder, only his thick cape kept it from being burned as his turmoil made his skin glow with searing heat.

"Minion," The Villain said as he set aside the mirror, turning to look at the goliath of a monster he called his best friend, "Promise me something," His own hand came to rest on the back of Minion's, spindly stark ash white fingers that were barely cool enough to stand, against shiny and thick black and rust red fur,

"Anything," Minion said without thought, "But know I am bad at promises," His voice was heavy, a deep baritone that rumbled through his chest, carryimg the sorrow that was held their out with it,

"Be a better king than I was," his own voice was cold, all the fire gone from it. He had done his mourning alone in his private rooms earlier, with one of Minion's shirts clutched tight to his chest. Now he just needed to be strong one last time,

"You ask impossible things of me," Minion snorted his almost pitch black eyes found the Villain's fire blues, "I can stay, We could fight them together-" he was always earnest, but now the force behind his conviction could burn hotter than even The Villain could,

"Then we would both be killed, and I would spend my last moments grieving," Villain sighed. He's seen his friend fall to those heros too many times to have any hope that he would survive another encounter. Villain wouldn't allow his own selfish desire to not be alone while facing his execution be what kills Minion.

Villain pulls his hand away, before slowly reaching with both to remove the crown from his head.

It was a circle of twistend and melted sword blades that he had forged for himself when he declared himself future king of this land, blood drenched and victorious. The tarnish on its surface evaporated as it turned red then white hot. The hard metal melting in his heated hands as he shaped it. The circle had fit him perfectly, it would sit nicely just behind his horns as a twisted accent to them. But it would have been far too small for Minion's skull. So he bent and twisted it until it was perfect again, now a half circle that could rest above his broad horns without interfering with his bovine ears or the pair of eyes that sat the highest on his face.

"Take this and go to your people, my friend, give them my apologies and your strength," He spoke while he finalized the shape, "If you do not think you can be a better king than I, then at least promise to be one that sees happier times and many, many more years," He took a breath before turning to look his friend in the eye, "Now kneel for me one last time,"

Minion's breath was choppy as silent oily tears stained the sides of his muzzle. Still, he knelt before the throne with his head bowed, not another word passing between his fangs. Even like this, hunched forward on one knee, he was almost a full hand taller than Villain.

Villain sapped the heat from the crown, setting it into its new shape and cooling it enough to not burn as it was placed, "The land shall recognize its new king," he set it between Minion's horns, his hands hesitating for a moment before drifting from the now cold metal to cup the sides of Minion's face, the fur here beneath his six eyes was silk beneath the former king's fingers.

Memories flooded him of the days spent with a pair of scissors between them as they tried to tame the thick beard that seemed determined to make a home here against Minion's wishes, and the laughter as they struggled to clean up the choppy edges, and the unavoidable bald spots that always cropped up do to Minion's inability to sit still, and Villain's imprecision.

"The people shall love you as much as I do," He brushed the tears away as Minion shook with a barely contained sob.

How many times have they spoken their love to each other? Whispers of desire hidden behind their genuine and iron strong friendship,

"You shall be victorious in all you attempt," Villain guided his friend to lean forward just enough for Villain to press a barely there kiss to the top of his snout as he passed on his final blessing before stepping away,

"Go now, go to your people and keep them safe. When you return… Let someone else handle the mess you will find, I couldn't bare to know I left you to sob over my corpse," Villain said, he sat the throne again, decidedly careful to look anywhere other than the hulking and devastated beast before him. He needed to be strong. He couldn't cry. Not now, not ever again.

Eventually Minion stood, his hooves scraping against the stone floors, "Rest well, when it happens." He said with shaky words, "You will be remembered, I will make sure of it," with that final promise he turned and left. Only stopping at the door to say one last thing before shutting the Villain in this tomb, "I love you,"

The door shut, the sound echoing theough the room like a thunder clap as the Villain's composure broke. He wiped at his eyes, furious with the hot red streaks that were surely staining his skin. No, no, no.

He needed to be strong. He needed to do this. He couldn't break now. Couldn't run to Minion and sob into the fur on his friends chest. Villain was always going to die. He was always going to be defeated by his fated enemy. But still, fear pulled at every inch of him.

He sobbed into his hands, staining his palms blood red. He had everything he ever wanted. A kingdom that was thriving, people that respected him, friends, a home, someone that he'd carve his own heart out for. And none of that mattered.

Because He would be dead before sunrise.

Because, thats how the stories always go.

[yzkhr]

"You don't deserve her."

"I really don't."

"She's too good for you."

"She is."

"She doesn't want to see you."

"Yeah, I figured as much."

"She's angry you know."

"I know."

"She hates you."

"She does."

"Then why?"

It took everything in Suzuki Sonoko to not just stand up from her seat in the bench and punch him right then and there. For being too overconfident, for being unbearable, for hurting her bestfriend.

She turned over to face him, expecting to see the same arrogant look he wears everytime she sees him. Instead, what she saw almost broke her heart. It wasn't the Kudo Shinichi she knew from her childhood to teenage days. It wasn't the jerk that always seemed to know everything and boasts it at the crowd every chance he gets. It wasn't the cheeky bastard that's tends to get on her nerves. It wasn't the insesitive prick who's too interested in mysteries.

No matter how hard she stares, it just wasn't him.

What she saw was a man who had too much of this world, tired and weary. A guy who's arrogance toned down by a lot, almost non-existent. Eyes that holds the same knowledge, yet seemed to figure out how to use it. She used to think that he's a child trying to play an adult, but now? An air of maturity flutters around him, showing his tremendous growth.

They bear the same face and features, yet the teenager she's familiar with seemed far too different from the man sitting beside her.

Sonoko never thought the day would come where he'd let down his pride and masculine walls, letting anyone, letting her, see behind them layers of insecurities and weaknesses no one would ever think he possessed. It almost made her give in and tell him.

But then Sonoko was reminded of her. Her devastated form as she opened the giant doors of her mansion to let her in. Her tears that seemed neverending and just got worse as time went on. Her face that Sonoko remembered to be gentle and kind was replaced by pure anger and sorrow. Her pink lips always adorned with a beautiful smile was now turned upside down, showing a frown.

Most of all, her eyes. The Suzuki heiress had always been fond of her bestfriend's eyes. Just like how eyes were the windows of one's soul, her eyes always spoke of her feelings and emotions, all out in the open. Sonoko was accustomed of how her eyes would look like in different situations.

Eyes that would be filled with anger at the sight of a violent criminal. Eyes that shows sadness, when a heartbreaking scene plays out. Eyes that portrays loneliness, when she's eaten by the plaguing thoughts of him. Eyes that always seemed to hold love and kindness, no matter who you may be.

But now? Mouri Ran's eyes were anything but that. Empty shells thats purpose was just to see. Eyes that look shallow and superficial, as if there really wasn't anything there at all. Eyes that look lost, not knowing a single thing.

So she steeled herself, not about to give in from his change of expression. It took more than just maturity to make her cave in and risk hurting her best friend even more.

"It's been a week Sonoko. I just want to see her if she's alright."

"Well, she's not. How can she be? After finding out her boyfriend's been lying to her all this time, letting her believe they're in a long distanced relationship when he's actually living in the same roof as her."

He winced from her words, affected. She wanted to take them back but she pushed even further.

"How can you expect her to be alright when she just got kidnapped by an unknown organization without knowing a thing, only to find out the truth about you in someone else's mouth?"

"Sonoko--"

"How can she possibly be alright when she's depressed over the fact that you don't trust her the same way she trust you? Answer me Shinichi-kun, how!?"

Her scream echoed throughout the desolated park, reminding her even more how alone the two of them are. He called her, first thing in the morning, asking if they could meet. Despite not wanting to, she knew she had to, for Ran's sake.

As expected, his goal was to ask her where Ran is, since everyone had no clue besides her. It had been a week since his big revelation, a week since he last saw of his girlfriend. She knew he couldn't blame Ran though, after what he had put the girl through.

Her best friend went directly to her, asking for temporary refuge, from him or from her own emotions, Sonoko didn't know. (She had a feeling it was from both).

After hearing everything, she wanted to slap him, blame him for what he had put her friend through, but a part of her couldn't it. Maybe it was because of Ran who wouldn't want to see him hurt, or maybe it was Sonoko herself, remembering that he's still her childhood friend, knowing he had been through enough that even a slap would be too much.

"I'm sorry."

She was broken out of her reverie by his quiet answer, that if they weren't alone in this place she wouldn't have heard it.

"I had no choice. I had to protect her. If she knew, they'd go after her. They'd kill her and I can't have that. I wouldn't be able to bear that. So even if it meant lying and pretending, I had to it."

His voice was cold yet sad, carrying too many emotions for Sonoko to figure.

"But she was still kidnapped wasn't she? Even though she didn't know a thing. Wouldn't it have been better if she knew? You could have warned her Shinichi-kun. You could have told her. You could have..."

The great detective of the east froze from her counterattack but a part of Sonoko knew he was expecting her response. He had to have known that. So she doesn't understand why? Why he didn't tell Ran. It just didn't make sense.

"I was scared. Just the thought of her knowing made me fear for her life. I just wanted to protect her, more than anything else."

His voice was low, yet it hold conviction, specially for the last part. His head hung low, as if the ground was more interesting than what was in front of him.

Despite not seeing his expression, Sonoko could hear the desperation in his voice, so uncharacteristically of Kudo Shinichi.

"That's not like you, Shinichi-kun. Usually, you'd be more logical about this things."

Sonoko hated to admit it, but after years of hanging out with him she managed to figure out his personality. He was cocky and tend to be insensitive towards other people's feelings but held a person's life to the highest regard. He has an almost surreal sense of justice like Ran, and would do a lot of things just to help a person out.

But what he was known for was his intelligence. Just like his father, Shinichi was someone who relied on science and facts rather than emotions. But his answer proved to be leaning too much on the emotional side than the logical one.

He laughed and looked up, but avoided eye contact with her. His blue eyes now in Sonoko's view softened as if remembering something.

"I've never been logical when it comes to her."

She thought he would be bitter, frustrated at not getting Ran. But his voice was gentle, fondness evident in his tone. Silence enveloped the two of them. Sonoko didn't know what to say. Her anger was still there but she knew that no matter what she said, he'd still be eager to meet with Ran. And, she hated to accept it, but there was a part of her that wanted them to fix this, both for Ran and his sake.

What would Ran do in this situation? Would she forgive him? Or would she run away instead?

After a few seconds, he decided to face her. His face tinged with seriousness and determination. Blue eyes blazing but tired, he spoke.

"Please. I just want to talk to her. To explain everything. If she still don't want to see me after that, I... I won't push it anymore."

Shinichi's voice got lower and quieter as he went on, that if the park wasn't so isolated she wouldn't have heard all of them. The manner he uttered his words started firm yet ended unsure, too painful for him to even consider his last statement.

Sonoko had never seen him like this, never even imagined that there would come a day the great detective of the east would asked—begged— to anyone, let alone her. It reflected a lot of things he'd been through and just how much he cared for Ran. How much he'd be willing to give for her, even his beloved pride. Just how much Kudo Shinichi loves Mouri Ran.

As she took one more look at his visage full of painful resolution, Suzuki Sonoko made her choice.

"She's in one of the Suzuki family's resthouse. I'm pretty sure she won't let you in so,"

She tossed him the gold key for the resthouse as his faced ranged from disbelief to gratitude, dark orbs gleaming. Sonoko kept her smile, not wanting to give him the satisfaction to see how hopeful she is for them as well.

"Now go, you're such a pain. And so we're clear, I did this for Ran okay? If it weren't for her, I would have seriously just let you drown in misery. I really don't know what she saw that made her fall in love you. You're nothing but a detective geek!"

If he wasn't so intensely focused at the key in his hand, Sonoko was sure Shinichi would have rolled his eyes at her in irritation. If it was the old Shinichi at least. Instead, he gave her a thankful smile and stood up, anticipation so clear painfully clear at his every step.

Before he sprinted away, Sonoko said her final words to her him.

"Shinichi-kun, no matter how many times she'll push you away, don't give up on her okay? It's your turn to wait for her this time."

The heiress and the detective never really see eye to eye. They were polar opposites, from preference to personality. Sonoko was a social person, while Shinichi was an introverted one. She loves to talk to strangers and hang out while he prefers to be curled up with a Sherlock Holmes novel, rereading it for the nth time.

Aside from both being arrogant people, the only thing they have in common was Ran. The two had known Ran since childhood and know how naive and innocent she can be. They're also aware of Ran's selfless nature, putting others before herself. Because of that, they put it upon themselves to be the ones to take care of her, while she's busy taking care of someone else.

Even though Ran was aversed to the idea of seeing him again, Sonoko knew it was simply her best friend's defense mechanism. She was just too wounded and hurt from the events that unfolded but deep down, Sonoko knew that her best friend wanted nothing more but to be with him.

Besides, despite Shinichi's countless mistakes, he tried to make it up to Ran in the form of Conan, the very same source of all his blunders. Despite have a body that of a kid, he really tried to protect Ran with the very best of his abilities. He also tried to comfort her, whenever she's sad because of his flase absence. That was more than enough for Sonoko to consider telling.

Being reminded of all the times Kudo Shinichi saved and protected Mouri Ran, Suzuki Sonoko thought he was almost good enough for her best friend.

Almost.

[almasidaliano]

Almasi for President

so in about 12 to 16 years, i am running for president. i do not believe the world will have ended then, though i do believe things will be different. hoping for better, not, not expecting worse. our system is broken. all of the systems are broken. the government is corrupt. the justice system is corrupt. those in charge are turning blind eyes, covering things up, and allowing the fall of our country. i will not be surprised if a civil war commences; although i'm also thinking they are going to really create and push for a purge. we are in real trouble then. that just goes back to what i said, are you standing for something or dying for nothing?

people were excited for biden to win. and i have to say, i was not one of them. biden seems like another puppet to me. obama was a puppet. he was his vp. crazy how biden is president and he has a black female vp now. that sounds like a win huh? wrong, she contributed to the failed prosecution of the officers who murdered Oscar Grant. that went over everyone's head during the election though. trump was just so bad had to get him out. biden is anti LGBTQ+. everyone wanted to put it on trump folks getting rowdy and such however, biden won and nothing changed.

trump's slogan was "make america great again." personally, i think he could have. trump's a businessman and to say the least, entertainment. they gave trump four years, why do you think they didn't renew his contract? because he was playing them. trump is a classist. he doesn't like poor people. personally, i think he just believes hardwork pays off, his did and so he just holds everyone to the standard he held himself. there are circumstances, however i think that's fair. he said all this racist shit everyone got mad. yet, he won by a landslide because the country said they would still rather this "bigoted, racist, sexist, classist asshole" than a woman. then the country complained the whole time. he exposed america and instead of society shining light and doing something they continued to do what we have been doing; pointing blame.

the system has failed us. the system failed us a long time ago. all trump did was present a call to action. the one thing i can give rednecks is they patriotic as fuck. they want the america they invision type shit. i feel like melanated people in general struggle with that because america never felt like home. america never wanted us here. but the fact of the matter is, this all we know. this is home now. there are 3 real options. 1. go back to where your bloodline stems. 2. sit and conform, hope they dont get you. 3. defend your rights, your home, and your people; come out on top or die trying. you have to pick something though. we have to do something because they those set to protect us are out to get us.

we do not have a democratic government not even a representative democracy like we once thought. sorry if you were today years old when you found out. we operate out of a republic; a constitutional federal republic. what's the difference? in a democracy, all that voting that we do, matters.  even if it was a representative democracy. we would have representatives to disclose our decisions. the electoral college makes final decisions on elections.

a constitutional federal republic means that the constitution which is the law of the land governs the land. if this is the law of the land, why do we have sub laws? the constitution needs to be amended. want to fix the race and inequality issues? let me tell you how, real easy fix. call a convention. take out any amendment that gives rights to people AND reword the beginning anyway folks see fit so that women and americans from all ethnic backgrounds get the same level of respect and rights. there will always be an unspoken division until things like that are rectified. before black people got rights we were not even counted as complete people, simply 3/5s of a person. life liberty and the pursuit of happiness. these are unalienable rights. my very existence guarantees me these rights.

the judicial system coupled with the criminal law system are hopeful, and still in need of reform. prisons are privately owned institutions, which are supposed to be forms of rehabilitation. instead, they are condemning people and treating them inhumanely; creating the same environment they were in on the outside, on in the inside conditioning them to be stuck in these ways as means of survival and then continue to place blame on them. officers need to take crimes more seriously. people are people, bias, prejudices, and profiling have no place in the workplace. officers are corrupt, arresting kids for selling, who just are trying to help their mother with the bills, then turning around and selling it back out on the streets. officers are wrongfully convictind and killing predominately (as far as the media is broadcasting) though not only melanated people. on top of that, they are walking free. lives are being lost and they arent even losing their jobs. tax dollars are going towards keeping them safe. however, if a civilian shoots a cop. up the river for them.

lawyers aren't fighting hard enough. especially defense attorneys. it is fairly simple to get a conviction with the right information, proving innocence is always a bit more complicated. the problem is that attorneys get too big eyed. they looking at how to get their clients off, accountability is another taboo in this society. there are a multitude of people who are innocent behind bars, as well as those who received heinous outrageous sentences. that is not right.

people factor more than necessary when trying to make a decision, yet they ignore the things that remind them a person is human. its this art contest over who can paint the best picture of the defendant. which story is easy for a jurors bias to sway? how people look matters. and it shouldn't. our government since the building of america, has created dividing markers.

just like with royal kingdoms, the wife couldn't have things of her own. her role was cleaning, cooking, taking care of the kids, and whatever else was asked of her. if there was a divorce, the woman got nothing. they had no rights. imagine being the first born as a female in a royal family and being told you can't have your kingdom, correction you can but you must marry to get it. then if you get married the new king running things not you. what is that? its called patriarchy. our government is run off a patriarchy as well.

so i never really believed there could be like a true separation of church and state because every law and decision made was based on people's morals and beliefs. there is supposed to be a separation of church and state yet, due to people's religious beliefs gay marriage had to get legalized, despite there being no law for heterosexual marriage. would that not make it illegal? since gay marriage had to be legalized though there was not a law for it either? then on top of that, how do you make it a law, and still for religious reasons, ministers and such can refuse? there are always stipulations and hinderances for the rights of those who are not white men.

ABORTION: i really do not know why we are still having this conversation. its literally conversations like this that have me looking at americans like--- seriously? once again there should be a separation of church and state. so religion cannot be a reason to outlaw it. how can you put out a law that dictates what someone can do with their body? all of life, i mean every part of life should be pro-choice. its just that simple. Pro-Choice. i am all for the right to decide for yourself. and men want to feel a way about women making that decision on their own. and while i do stand behind the fact that ultimately it is the womans decision, that does not mean she can't listen to an opinion. it is a part of the woman, literally grows inside of her an entire being. and fathers can just dip out and folks will just look at the mom and suddenly she should just become super woman. the pressure that comes with having a child is enough on its own. like thats a being that is dependent on you. some people are honest with themselves and know they arent ready or dont want it. all they need is support. the mental toll life takes on us is huge as well. still people do not consider that at all.

there is no point of incarcerating people, if they have still lost a chance at a decent life once they get out. jail is for rehabilitation. they go, do their time and then they are supposed to be allowed to try again. our government knows nothing of redemption, that's why all the top leaders go through so much to hide their dirt. they crucify civilians trying to make themselves seem superior, really they are just like you and i. almasi for president. im going to save the world.

-Almasi

[ccntrcl]

------ ------ ------  “They’re pretty aren’t they.” 

                           It’s a sudden remark. A statement rather than a question really. A change of topic— just because. The constant back and forth banter had turned just a bit dull; bland. Not worth another moment's attention & so crimson hues abandoned them rather swiftly. instead, focusing upon the view coated in white outside. Cold bony fingers refuse to withdraw from the warmth emanating from the teacup clutched gently between her palms, settled delicately pon her dress. And really... It’s not a lie. The birds perched on the fragile branches of the tree rotting away alongside her; the cruel passage of time drags them all regardless of circumstances— were indeed pretty. Pretty & well... He must’ve picked up on her meaning, hadn’t he? yup her brother was always perceptive, though dense in some regards. But she doesn’t doubt that he knows what they mean. He must- it’s clear in his behavior.  these are the types of topics his mind doesn’t shy away from; innocence never turns a blind eye --- --- always so eager to drown in guilt & a sense of duties.                            (       somedays she -  almost  -   lets him  .        )

                                   Somedays she feels cruel, and somedays she felt kindness tinge her fingertips; as though all she touches transforms into glittering gold & of course— be preserved in eternity. but they never do... it’s a foolish notion to hold & dream about; nothing could be everlasting --- change is inevitable & so,  they soon corrode & darken & CRUMBLE INTO DUST. Forever forgotten, only to be remembered by her: if she bothers too that is. & so she continues. there’s a sick satisfaction in probing, in pushing him--- a glimpse into his future for what shall remain once she has been returned to where she came from; an evil voyeuristic plea resonates within her mind. a small ‘lemme see’  ‘lemme see’ that follows & echos with the urge to bully him--- it’s just harmless fun, right?    ahh --- aha. perhaps she’s being a tad bit too cruel. but that does nothing to deter her as more harmless words continue to spill from parted lips; venom was never present within them... it’s the receptor's interpretation & reaction that it all hangs upon.  “Do you believe them to be worth all the admiration & praise they receive?”

                                 &  Today she feels cruel. 

                                                 The poems they wrote, the songs they sang about freedom and some false childish daydream of escaping fate — laced with hopes of a higher purpose. The world always operates in such a blind manner; refusing to acknowledge what’s in front & forever casting their eyes towards the suns of tomorrow. Neglecting the today & now for the sake of weakly bound together morals; what was the point of something better when they had ‘now’ thats deteriorating right in front of them. but... that part of humanity & the people was beautiful too. a conviction strong enough too actually change something or blindly await its demise. well, she was simply musing... it’s not exactly good to generalize now, is it?  no. it limits the mind too much.  “  you know what I believe ---?   ” a sing-song voice rings out answering her own question, not at all expecting or awaiting him to respond; the extended silences measured by her impatient temperament was answer enough... besides it was something akin to a rhetorical question anyway.   

               (        briefly, does she wonder if it’s her cynicism’s silent acceptance                        that leads her to torment her kin or some long-forgotten cord that                        begs to strike a nerve & unsettle ------    aha.   whatever it may be,                        she doesn’t actually enjoy glaze that paints over his hues.  perhaps                        it        was        time      to          stop         this       now---       !      )    

                                        “   I think --- them to be rather trite.   ”   & it was the truth. not an attempt to console his ever consuming guilt... she’s honest when she speaks to him; a coil of sympathy churns within her stomach... really she shouldn’t bully him now.  he’ll have the next 20 - 30 years where he --- her kind, soft - hearted    dear   brother, whom she cherishes so deeply will be forced to swallow that guilt of having killed her.  she doesn’t fault him for this; for their circumstances. he isn’t at fault  --- it was simply chance... meant to happen. haa. & they called her cursed ------ he too, suffers the weight of this burden & will be dragged into the abyss once all his chains have been transferred to his successor, and another child of ill - omen was sent back to it. ;     &    so,   the   cycle    never    ends!   “   I  believe... that they are no more different than you & me.   ”   free they may be. but they, too are bound by the cruel fruit of fate. “   they’re just like us don’t you think? --- ah, my tea’s gone cold... perhaps it’s best if we go & prepare a new batch, don’t you think?  ”  fickle mind already  made up , she clutches his sleeve & drags him away from the window sill; from the misary & weight that begs to drag him & hang on him for the rest of his days--- & so, for as long as she’s here:   she   won’t   let   him   drown.  

[footygirl114]

Cargador (Alexia Putellas X Reader) Version 1

Hello Friends!! I have a fun version of choose your own ending for part 2 to Suspirando!! They both have the same opening scene, however the rest of the story is different, one is very fluffy and one is angsty. I am posting them both and you can decide which one your in the mood for! I owed someone 2 fics and this is the way I decided to reward them :)

This one is the fluffy one, you’ll see if you read both what scene remains the same!

The only thing running through your mind when you take off from the cafe after your display of admiration is you need to get away from there. You almost couldn’t believe what just happened, did you really just defend Alexia to the ex she’s trying to get back with? What were you thinking. 

Almost on cue your phone rings, and you let go of the breathe you were holding when you realise it is Leah calling. 

“Hola captain!” you greet her when you pick up the phone slowing down to a walk. 

“Hey hey! How’s it going?” she asks you. 

Her timing could not have been better as you say “I may have just done something stupid?” 

You can hear the disappointment in her voice as she asks “uh oh what did you do now?” 

“hey I am normally good!” you defend yourself. 

“two words Y/N, fake girlfriend” she argues back with a laugh. 

You groan and cant help but let out a chuckle as you tell her “fair enough Leah” 

“So what did you do this time?” she asks you. 

At this point you had walked to the water, and find a patch of beach close enough that you can hear the waves while you tell her what happened. “I ran into Alexia’s ex at a coffee shop” you tell her.

“And?” 

“well she was saying some not so nice things about Ale, and I couldn’t just stand there and let her Leah.” Knowing you needed to get it all out before Leah interrupted you power through and say “I defended her, about how amazing she is, and how she’s an idiot for treating Alexia the way she is. I let my feelings out Leah.” You can feel the tears gathering in the corners of your eyes as you finish and you turn to look up at the sky to prevent them from falling. 

She gives you a moment before she says “Y/N you know that you couldn’t keep them in for long, I know you and I know you feel everything deeply. Hearing her talk down on Alexia would have definitely set you off, and I’m glad it did, maybe now she’ll think twice before she hurts her again.” 

“It was bad, she was talking about how she was only with her to help her image and all this stuff, It made me feel gross knowing that I’m basically doing the same thing” you tell her feeling a bit defeated. 

“Hey no, Y/N thats not what you’re doing at all. You are just being there for Alexia, yeah its a little unorthodox but you are doing what you can to help your friend out. There is no shame in that, where there’s tons of shame in her only being with alexia to help her image” You smile at the conviction you can hear in Leah’s voice knowing she is probably right. 

“Thank you for listening to me” you tell her with a small smile. 

“anytime” she says and adds on “Want to know what I think this means?” 

“of course” 

“well I think now that you know she’s like this, it’s time you put on your grown up pants and told the girl how you feel. You can’t let her go back to that Y/N, plus I don’t think you’ll be able to keep the feelings in now that you’ve let them out.” She tells you softly. 

Taking a moment to think it over before you respond you tell her “You might be right, but I think I am going to unplug tonight and sleep on it” 

She laughs and asks “did you lose your charger again?” 

“It was one time, Leah get over it” you laugh back at her.

She laughs and says “One time per break but whatever. I think it’s a good idea to unplug though, will you call me tomorrow after training?”

“Of course I will, thanks for calling, and for the record I haven’t lost my charger, I am just letting my phone die on purpose.” You tell her with a laugh.

“sure Y/N, have a good night!” she tells you. 

“you too!” 

You hang up and start to walk back to your place, turning you phone off as you go. You already have plans to binge tv and pass out early tonight. 

****************

The following morning you walk into training with a spring in your step, you decided that you were going to say something to Alexia about your feelings. Your feelings for her, as well as what her ex said to you, at the end of the day she’s an adult and she can make her own decisions. You do believed she deserved to know all the facts before she made the decision though. 

You arrived a bit early hoping to catch Alexia before the team shows up, since she’s always early. When you walk in to a mostly empty room you are hopeful but before you have a chance to spot her Mapi, comes up to you and says “Y/N I have been calling you all night” 

“sorry Maps I turned my phone off, is ale here yet?” you ask as you look around, but don’t see her bag. 

Pina yells out “yeah right Y/N, did you lose your charger again?” 

Amid the chuckles of the change room you hear Mapi as she hands you her phone and says “you need to watch this Y/N” 

 “Mapi I need to speak to Alexia” You tell her and give her a look. 

“she’s not here Y/N, she called coach and won’t be at training today.” Mapi tells you immediately gaining your attention. 

“what? why?” you ask her. 

She shrugs and says “not sure maybe because of this?” and she shoves her phone towards you again. 

Rolling your eyes you grab her phone and see she’s on twitter. As you focus closer you realise its multiple videos of Alexia on her feed. Before you watch them you turn to Mapi and ask “what the heck is this?” 

She lets out a groan and says “just watch them Y/N” 

Rolling your eyes you press play on the first one and watch as the video catches you storming out of the cafe and Alexia watching from the side entrance, where she must have snuck in without you noticing. You watch as she turns towards her ex and says something the camera doesn’t catch. 

Knowing you need to hear this you scroll to another video thats closer and press play and listen to Alexia tell her ex “I cannot believe you, I should have known that ignoring the red flags was not a good thing. The fact that I wasted any time on you when all you wanted was someone on your arm is ridiculous. I shouldn’t have been so fucking  blind to what was in front of me the whole time.” 

Then you see her ex step closer to her and say “I knew it, I always knew you had a thing for her, did you cheat on me with her?”

You watch on as Alexia shakes her head and tells her “No I didn’t, I know you fucked most of the models on your circuit though. I also know that I deserve way better then you.” 

“You think she’s going to treat you better than me? I gave you everything” she tells Alexia. 

Alexia laughs and says “no you took everything from me, you used me for my parties and award shows. I realise that now. I’m done, have a nice life.” 

Alexia turns to head out the door and the ex yells out a “fuck you, you are nothing special and could never fuck me right anyway” 

When the video ends you are standing there staring at the screen as you process what you just saw. “was that about me?” you quietly ask Mapi.

“I think so, they didn’t get you on video, what did you say?” she asks you, as she reaches and takes her phone of your hands. 

You step back and sit down on the bench as you tell Mapi “I called the ex an idiot for treating her that way and told her how great Alexia is basically.” 

Mapi laughs a “of course you did” 

You feel the smile spreading on your face as you look up and say “i need to tell her Maps” 

“you do, but its going to have to wait.” she says as more of the team files into the change room. 

You spend the rest of training looking for Alexia and remembering she’s not there, you know you will have to find her later. All you can think about is how you are finally going to tell her that you are in love with her. The smile doesn’t leave your face all of training, and the whole drive home. You make it up the steps and start down the hall towards your door when you see her. She’s sitting on the floor leaning against the door with a bouquet of lilacs in her hands. 

You walk up and immediately she stands and greets you with a “hola Y/N” 

Still smiling you tell her “hey Ale, I missed you at training” 

She looks down nervously and says “i had some loose ends to take care of, I just needed the day” 

“hey no, its okay Ale” you tell her and you step closer to her “you are allowed to take some space you know” 

She lifts her head and meets your eyes as she says “these are for you Y/N, I need to tell you something.” she finishes her though nervously. 

Smiling you take the flowers and reach out to tuck a piece of her hair behind her ear as you tell her “I saw the videos Ale.” 

“you did?” she asks with a smile. 

Nodding you cup her cheek and step in and press a kiss to her cheek close to her mouth as you tell her “Thank you for standing up for me” 

She closes her eyes and whispers out “i’m sorry it got to that point Y/N. I should have noticed what was right in front me a long time ago” 

“oh yeah? and what was that?” you ask stepping even closer to her, your hand still on her cheek.

She opens her eyes and meets yours as she says “you” and she leans in and closes the distance between you and presses her lips to yours. 

You immediately close the gap still between you and wrap your arms around her neck as you let her guide your hips with her hands to be flush against her. It isn’t until a door slams down the hallway do you pull back and meet her eyes with a quiet “wow.”

She smiles and presses a kiss to your forehead as she says “wow indeed hermosa” 

[sharkmobster]

spider verse coffee shop au??

Anon im sorry i wanted to draw the coffeeshop au but ive been so tired lately so imma just overshare about what goes down bc this au is just (thick tombstone voice) : “everybody’s traumatized bitch lets get you a latte”

 • this au is incredibly villain centric bc uhhhhh all i do is think about villains

 • its also very aaron davis centric bc time to project my anxiety onto a grown ass man babey!!

 • anyway this takes place in a normal world where there’s no superheros or avengers or what have you, everyone’s super average 

• like i said this is more or less aaron centric and focuses on him readjusting to society and making connections with other people, and just healing in general. Aaron’s whole deal is that he was wrongfully arrested for defending himself against an off duty cop who was harassing him and ended up with a 10 year sentence  (but was let off a year earlier for good behaviour). He’s got a lot of guilt bc of this if only for the fact that he feels like he let down his brother and Miles (who was a small lad at the time).

 • Fun Fact! Jefferson was the one that picked up Aaron at the jail when he served out his sentence! The ride back to brooklyn was awkward! but also jefferson loves his brother and even tho they’ve had their falling outs he never once stopped believing that his brother was innocent. Jefferson also made sure to pull some strings and ended up getting an apartment set up for Aaron (even though jefferson and rio were 100% down to open their home to him for as long as it took him to get back onto his feet but of course aaron denied them bc he didnt want to be a burden) Aaron’s grateful but he tends to avoid his own family…a lot….

• it’s ridiculously hard to find a job bc nobody wants to hire an ex convict no matter the circumstances and Aaron’s legitimately about to lose hope when he spots an expensive looking shop nestled in between an old arcade and a knick knack shop

 • ‘Vanessa’s Cafe’ is neatly printed above the door in fancy gold lettering. it’s obvious that the owner has serious cash bc the shop looks too damn good and too well maintained to be a regular mom and pop shop. there’s a help wanted sign hastily scribbled on a piece of notebook paper in the middle of the window which is odd since it off sets the professional vibe of the place. But hey it’s worth a shot so Aaron walks in ready to be denied another job only to find the weirdest looking group of people he’s ever seen.

 • The first guy that catches his attention is the very large albino man who looks way too stressed out and manic to be working in a coffeeshop, but the job must pay well because he’s very well dressed.

 • “Liv, for fuck’s sake! Clean your goddamn station!” he’s whisper shouting? Is that even a thing? oh look at that he’s got a full set of razor sharp teeth. huh. that’s a hell of an aesthetic he’s going for.

 • The lady in question isn’t even giving him the time of day, just enthralled by her phone with a smile that looks too peaceful given what’s happening around her. She’s got wild hair tied up messily in a knitted bandana, weird glasses (custom made??) and when she glances up at aaron, her eyes widen in interest like he’s some anomaly to be cracked open. aaron looks anywhere that isnt the wild eyed lady at the counter.

• Theres another big guy that’s hanging around the back, heavily tattooed and lifting stacks of heavy boxes. Aaron takes notice of his prosthetic hand and the tattoo guy takes notice of Aaron. 

• “Lonnie. Customer.” The Tattoo guy seems nonplussed about Aaron and walks into the back. aaron assumes that he’s offended him by staring at his prosthetic for longer than necessary which yeah….yeah he’s probably not happy about the staring. 

 • lonnie’s got a bad case of resting bitch face so he’s glaring at aaron without actually glaring and he’s just rough around ALL the edges so his tones got that nice bite to it as he shouts from across the counter (which is not something you do to a customer but it’s lonnie…..)  "Hey! Ya looking for a job, skinny jeans?!“

 • Aaron blanches at the idea of working with these people but he is absolutely desperate for a job at this point.

 •"Yeah. I just got out of-”

 •"Great, you’re hired! We’re speed running this whole introduction thing, string bean.“

 •and that’s all i got other than like small details like:

 •Peter B Parker owns a ”“’'cafe”“” across from Vanessa’s and its literally just a burger joint that h a p p e n s to sell coffee and Parker will fight you if you call his place a deli ahdhdj

 •Liv and May are dating (big shock) and peter b has to constantly deal with seeing his competition over at his place all the time and it’s yikes

 • Tombstone and Noir will 100% throw hands on contact. They don’t hate each other tho??? Its weird they just like to fight. gives them a chance to work on their banter i guess. Noir works the coffee machine at Peter’s “'cafe”’ so i guess he’s the “”barista”” of the joint but he drinks the coffee more than the customers do

 • Miles and the rest of the spider kids “”“”“"intern”“”“” at the cafe which basically translates to free labor

 •  spider ham works there but he isnt a pig he’s just john mulaney. i know its weird. nobody actually sees him tho so he’s a complete mystery as to what he looks like so he could be john mulaney you never know. the only person who’s seen him is noir and that’s only bc they’re  a thing???

 •oh speaking of everyone being gay:  everyone’s gay

 • Lonnie and Gargan (tombstone and scorpion) are 100% dating but everyone legitimately thinks that the both of them are straight old men despite the fact that they live together, go to work together, hang out afterwards together, and they’re just always together

 • lonnie’s  daughter (janice)  visits every other week (def the product of a divorce he went through years ago) she’s alright with gargan but she’s very distant towards her dad and def has that teen angst phase that she’s going through

 • (lonnie can and will talk to you for hours about how much he loves and supports his daughter despite the fact that their relationship is very estranged)

 • you can find janice hanging out with the cute blond punk girl at that weird burger/coffee place across the street

 • oh gargan’s big and strong despite the fact that he’s missing three limbs, liv works in robotics on the side and constantly tweaks and repairs his prosthetics when they start acting up which leads to them having this weird friendship where they both borrow each other when they need something and dont really expect anything in return (like gargan’s good for getting her supplies and doing heavy lifting when she needs it and liv’s always down to run check ups on gargan)

 • oh yeah liv used to be a scientist but immediately lost her license and phd when she started going above some board members heads to buy less than legal things through super illegal sources

.• that’s another thing, kingpin tends to just hire ex cons and criminals to work in his cafe just bc he believes that a person willing to work hard to better themselves deserves a chance to re enter society again.

 • like they’ve all done bad things but still ended up with a job at the cafe. aaron fought a cop, liv did some shady deals for an illegal experiment, gargan used to run a drug ring years ago due to personal reasons but once he was free from jail he never dealt with the stuff again, and lonnie killed a dude (allegedly. he never went to jail bc they couldn’t prove anything but hey word spread around quick and everyone knew not to go anywhere near this guy)

 • kingpin is in this au btw he’s just……a very depressed man who’s still grieving over his wife and son dying in a car accident

.• he rarely shows up to run the cafe bc its too much for him being in the place that his wife loved and built up from the ground. he used to be the manager after she died but couldn’t handle it and mostly left lonnie to take care of it

• which holy fuck lonnie is trying his best to keep this cafe alive and well and there’s only two other people working there so like its enough to have him scrambling all over the place trying to find more help (thanks aaron)

 •miles doesn’t know aaron’s working at the cafe across the street and aaron def wants it that way bc even tho he’s out of jail he hasn’t actually……visited miles yet….. it’s the shame that’s keeping aaron from reaching out to him which is….sad bc miles doesn’t care what happened he just wants his uncle back.

 • oh oh one more thing RIPeter used to run the deli across the street but had to leave brooklyn to go volunteer at homeless shelters across the states indefinitely so theres no telling when he’ll be back, so he left the cafe under the guidance of pb parker (peter b parker voice: my cafe now)

 •and uhhh thats all i got, like i said this au is just found family trope + the healing we all want + bad people getting redemption which is all the tropes that i love all compacted together in the most cliche au you can imagine!

[sdhanagare]

Happy Birthday Amitji

Amitabh Bachchan completes 77 years and 50 years of entertaining us.

It was 1969 he made his debut. I was just 5 years old.

In 1970 we left for Brighton England for my Fathers doctorate, ( before which in 1969 a superstar came on the horizon in form of Rajesh Khanna

I remember the last movie we saw before leaving India was Aradhana).

We were in England for almost 4 years. So I missed the phenomena of Rajesh Khanna and the blooming of Amitabh Bachchan.

I remember the first movie I saw was Roti Kapada aur Makaan it was 1974 at Heer Palace Kanpur. I fell in love with the charismatic character of Vijay .

His journey from a unruly youth to the army where he looses his arm( my father used to tease me for many days as Dunda Haath Chalaaye Bandook ) was very well depicted by him under the direction of Manoj Kumar. The way he drives the motorcycle with the accelerator between his teeth. I was overwhelmed , His anger was so genuine.

The second movie I remember was Benaam. A suspense thriller and my admiration for him increased.

This was followed by reruns of Anand Namak Haraam and Abhimaan at our L7  auditorium at IIT Kanpur ( as they had been released when we were abroad )

I used to ask my parents to take me to see his releases.

Those were the days of advance booking and being away from the main city many times we could not get tickets to his movies..

We had to try thrice before we could see Deewar and Sholay both released in the year of emergency 1975.

Faraar, Chupke Chupke and Mili were the first movies I saw more than once in those days as a 11 year old. Thankfully for me my parents also were movie buffs. ( Obviously I could not go alone then but started doing so 4 years later )

Something which came to me genetically as my grandmother also was a movie fan. We used to see movies over the fortnight.

After almost 2and half months during my Diwali Vacation of 1975, we finally got tickets to Sholay at Sundar theatre. The movie then was ruthlessly edited with Asranis scenes as also Jayas Holi Scenes being cut . But that movie had a great impact on me, esp the character of Jai.

It was later in 1976 in its Golden Jubilee week I we saw Deewaar.

After Deewar I was totally smitten with Amitji, I used to tie a knot on my shirt like he did. Since then somehow or the other I saw every movie released.

In 1978 we shifted to Pune.

In Pune I realised that theatres were not so far as in Kanpur and I had a cycle.

In 1979 in 9th Standard I bunked school and went to see The Great Gambler ( which my parents would not allow as it was for Adults ). In Pune I understood the concept of Advance Booking, where bookings for a movie used to open on Monday and if one wished to see a film First day then that booking needed to be done.

In vacations we used to go my Dads Hometown of Washim ( then in Akola, now a district ) , there we had a theatre owned by a trust of which my grandfather was a trustee. Movies were free for us and seats were reserved for trustees.

Used to love going to the movies there but my memory brightens up when I remember that I saw Muqaddar Ka Sikander 4 times on the trot in 4 days, including once ( Interval to Interval ). Sholay I saw there 5 times in a week, this was thankfully the uncut version .

It is a well-known chapter of Indian film history beginning with the release of Prakash Mehras Zanjeer in 1973 which turned Amitabh into a goldmine.

This movie I finally got to see first on DD and in the theatre as late as 1980 during a re-run. Smouldering in the Salim-Javed dialogues and refracted through the Amitabh flamboyance fired the imagination of a whole nation as nothing had ever done before a trend which was carried ahead in Deewar, Sholay,Trishul, Don, Kaala Pathhar, Shaan, Shakti.

Movies then used to release phase wise first in Metros and a week or even later in other cities . Pune normally movies released a week later than Mumbai

And Lonawala used to come in the Mumbai circuit. I used to take a local to Lonawala to see Amitabhs movies. Once for Yaarana the tickets were not available in Black also , I took a ride at the back of a truck and went till Khopoli and saw the movie. Similarly Kaalia also I saw at Lonawala.

From Pune used to go for Summer Vacations to Mumbai and saw many movies there. Namak Halaal, Dostana, Desh Premee, Mahaan were all seen there.

Once I decided to go and visit his house, then Prateeksha. I had gone alone and after I reached just looked at the house in awe.

I always used to think if I could ever meet him, see him.

Thats a long story and long time ahead.

One incident I remember that in 1991, my father was travelling from Delhi to Mumbai,( and from Mumbai to Pune by road, as Pune airport was not functional then). On reaching home he asked me during dinner , guess who was next to me on the flight ( He was eligible for Business Class then ). I couldnt guess and he told me, your favourite Amitabh Bachchan. I was zapped, I said Dad did you get his autograph ? Dad replied, why should I , Iam not his fan, when you meet him, take it .

Cut to 1994 , I had won the All India award for Best Sales performance and the award was to be given at Mumbai. We were invited to Mumbai and put up at Ajantha Ambassador hotel. We were to join the team from Pune as they started from Sangli by Mahalaxmi express which reached Pune at 6am, we found that very early and decided to come by Deccan Queen which reached Mumbai by 10.30 am. As I reached the Hotel, I saw a Mercedes Van coming out of the gate, I wowed it and came to the reception where my colleague Pravin Rayate greeted me with.. You should have come a bit earlier, Amitabh Bachchan was in the lobby to pick up Jaya Ji {who had her office on the second floor ( Saraswati Audiovisuals, the makers of the TV hit seriel Dekh Bhai Dekh )}. So I Mercedes I saw was his and if I had taken Mahalaxmi express and come, I would have met him. It was not to be. It dampened the spirits of my award ( which I received two days later at Taj from the hands of Adi.B and Nadir.B Godrej .

The Journey moved on..

Insipte of the ups and downs, odds and evens Amitabhs box-office records can be described only in superlatives. Producers and distributors seemed to believe still that even a flop with Amitabhs name on the marquee is a good enough grosser, which was proved by the trade.

His image of the angry young man had viewers reeling under the magic of neorealism, where dream and daydream coalesced in a brave new world. The myriad manifestations of Amitabhs no-holds-barred rebellion offered a blissful release to the repressions of a whole generation. The star became a cult figure of radical dynamism, of iconoclastic change. He was no stranger to the seaminess of street life. His idealism rose not from birth or class, but from action. His avatars recurred in shanties and ghettos, in the underworld dens and among the dregs of humanity. There he battled with the predators of the concrete jungle for survivalhis belligerence hiding a tender heart, family virtues, human kindliness. He was the ultimate good man, often turned bad by circumstances, whose atonement came through self-sacrificeoften unto gory, long-drawn death.

So from Zanjeer through Deewar, Sholay, Mukaddar ka Sikandar, Shahenshah, Inderjeet, Agneepath and Akayla, to Khuda Gawah, the Amitabh archetype continues to reflect variations on a simplistic mould, magnified to a brilliant potency; it has now become part of the collective psyche of a nation of filmgoers. It was the perfect antidote to the dystopian nightmare of modern mechanistic existence, especially in the less cynical times of the recent past. Amitabh individuates his roles with the utmost confidence and conviction. He makes the unsubtle seem subtle, touches the crass with class, makes melodrama credible. Certainly, no other Indian actor had the speaking eyes and spellbinding voice to infuse nuanced suggestivity into stereotypical situations. His finesse did not alienate his characters from the masses.

In the mid 90s he moved towards central Character roles the catalyst being Mohobattein.

Then came the super hit T.V. show Kaun Banega Carorepati anchored by Amitabh. It gave an entire new life to his career which was under the dark shadow.

Finally out of the blue came the date, 12th November 2018.

The prelude to this date was the fact that I had connected to Amitji on all his social media accounts , also my senior colleague Dr Manoj Mehta who was an active participant of ABEF ( Amitabh Bachchan extended Family ), offered us a chance to be a spectator at the KBC show , we ( My friend / ex senior from Godrej Sanjay Pandey, and current colleague Kapil Sharma ) . The date was 12th November. It was the last week of shooting of that season. We reached the sets at Film City at 2 pm sharp but had a long wait till 8pm till we were finally seated, alas in the third row. It was another wait for an hour before the shoot began. Finally at @ 9.00pm he came in a Maroon Suit, seeing him I froze.. There he was some 25 feet away from me. Very interactive with the crowd, very sportive, responding to our comments and jokes. How almost 4 hours past, and it was well after 12am that the photos he has with the audience started and well after 1 am that he left. Look at his dedication reached the sets at 9 am completed 2 episode shoots and left at 1 am. He had just turned 76 then. I had finally seen with my eyes, my hero , my idol, or even if I may say My god.

But better things were ahead, The 2019 edition of KBC started in August 2019.

We had epressed our wish to be a participant again. It was 18th July, at 7.12 pm got a message from Dr Manoj that we could attend the shoot on 6th August as the show restarted on 5th August. This time the procedure was different. There was an online procedure which need to be followed up with the invite.

We did that. But July end, rains started in Mumbai and Pune, everywhere there were spells of flooding, roads closed. Sanjay and Myself were the only two left from Pune and a friend of Sanjay, Kailash Agarwal was to jpin us at Mumbai.

The forecast was rains, we debated till late evening weather to go or quit, but the urge of seeing him was so much that we decided to take the risk.

We reached at 3 pm sharp , but this time there wasnt a long wait. We enrolled ourselves and it was an hour and half later that we were inside. This time being enrolled from the ABEF , we got privileged entry, and were in the first row.

Oh what a feeling it was !! Another hour Later Big B made his majestic entry. Again he was interactive with the crowd, and the shooting ended at 8.30 pm.

Then the photographs moments came. Finally he was in front of me, I had taken a token gift for him, which he accepted. Took his Biography along which he autographed. I was trembling in joy as I shook hands with him, talked to him, it lasted a minute but the emotions were beyond eternity.

Finally at the age of 55 and 45 years later I got to meet him.

Nobody else ever had this deadly combination of unmatched talent and charisma and nobody else will ever have it in future. Then there was style, polish and a great deal of seclusion encouraging rumours and augmenting the aura. Anyway one looked at it, the man radiates power. To recapitulate there has only been one super star in India, and that is Amitabh Bachchan. 

[dregstrash]

Earning the Present(s) [3/4]

Who says presents have to be given on Christmas? (me, the very late, very sorry fic writer)-- another long one folks

Part 1 || Part 2

Summary: Five years after the events of the Ice Court, the six outcasts were in the prime of their lives. They had everything they had fought and bled for: money, power, promise, home. But this holiday season, a surprisingly altruistic event has them all under the same roof, and they all may have been a little older and a little wiser, but they were still those teenagers who had done the impossible and had almost died countless of times. And when the idea of a holiday gift exchange comes up the true test of their friendship and their growth is thrown into the rink.

-----------------------

WYLAN

Wylan wasn’t sure how he could have possibly ended up here. Whether or not it was by Ghezen’s Hand or from Inej’s saints, but he was positive that it had to be some sort of cosmic intervention that had led him sitting in front of his fireplace, holding his husband’s hand, and surrounded by thieves and an ex-convict.

“That was quite the celebration, Wylan.” Inej said from her place by the window. “I think Kerch might do some good having an orphanage like that in its streets.”

“Thank you, Inej.” Wylan smiled at her. “Getting it past the Council was tough enough, but I’m just happy to give some of those kids a home.”

Jesper snorted beside him, “Yeah, now there actually might be space at The Slat.”

“How did you get those fat birds to donate to your cause anyhow?” Nina brought up. She was tucked firmly under Matthias’s arm and looked positively comfortable.

Wylan felt a slight blush at the measures he had taken to ensure the Council’s support of such an extravagant building to house the countless of orphans roaming the streets, and he tried his best not to look at Kaz as he said, “Let’s just say the right leverage was applied.”

“Oh saints,” Nina rolled her eyes then turned a lazy finger towards Kaz, “You need to stop corrupting his sweet mind.”

Kaz’s lips twitched, “Van Eck doesn’t need me to corrupt his brain. That’s why he keeps Fahey around.”

“Hey,” Jesper protested, “That’s Mr. Van Eck to you, Brekker.”

Wylan grinned and settled to drink his tea as the argument continued on. He wasn’t particularly proud of asking Ketterdam’s most notorious villain to help to threaten the Kerch Council to make this orphanage happen, but he didn’t regret it either. He would have paid for the construction of the building himself, but the land that he was eyeing for the site was owned by the city. When Wylan had brought up his request, one of his father’s oldest friends (who had held a grudge against Wylan ever since his father received his life sentence in jail) suggested that the land would be best used for other means. 

And before he knew it, Wylan’s plans of the orphanage were starting to fall apart before they had even begun. It wasn’t just the orphanage that had been upsetting him. It was how easily the Council had looked over his request and how the idea of building an estate for the very act of charity was less worthy. Echoes of his father’s voice had resounded in his head, and this startlingly new conviction settled in his chest and one thing led to another and he had found himself sitting awkwardly in front of Kaz Brekker at The Slat stumbling through the situation.

“I’m willing to pay you half of the exported sugar I have coming in this month, if you can help get this off the ground.”

Kaz hadn’t moved throughout the entire exchange. He could have been a statue as Wylan talked and his dark eyes stayed steadily on him. Even when he had finished talking he remained still.

“Does Jesper know you’re here?”

“He does, and he highly discouraged me from coming. Something about getting into bed with a demon.” Wylan had explained.

“At least being married to you finally wised him up,” Kaz murmured before he looked past Wylan and got a familiar, distant expression on his face. “That sugar shipment, it’s coming from Zemini, isn’t it?” He had finally said.

Wylan didn’t bother asking how he knew that, “Yes.”

“The ship it’s on has one of the largest cargo holds in your fleet.” He said again. Wylan nodded. “Hmm...I’ll help if I can take that ship off of your hands for the rest of the year.”

“What are you going to do with it?” Wylan asked raising his eyebrow.

“I have certain business ventures across the sea, that require speed and space.”

“Right.”

“And just so we’re clear, Wylan. You’re asking me to convince certain members of the merchant council to approve your plans for this orphanage? Through any means necessary?”

“Yes.” Wylan cleared his throat, “It’s a good plan and this city could deal with at least some kindness. Even if it comes through the Bastard of the Barrel himself.”

Kaz’s sharp smile caught Wylan off guard.

 “Then the deals the deal, merchling.” He held out his gloved hand and Wylan shook it firmly. “Wait a couple weeks and suggest the plan again. You’ll probably be able to start construction soon after that.”

And true to his word, Wylan went back to the council and no sooner had he finished did they approve the plans and even called it Ghezen’s work that an orphanage should be built to educate those who had nothing. Jesper had scoffed at the reasoning, but was just as excited as his husband when Wylan drew up blue prints, started to hire crew members, and then ultimately its grand opening.

Jesper had been by Wylan’s side through it all. He helped with some of the ground work, supervised when Wylan was away taking care of his mother, and calmed him when the ever-present self-doubt started to creep back in his mind. After the Ice Court job, it had seemed almost like a dream for someone like Jesper to stick around to Wylan, but there he was. Then his tall, Zemeni, thrill-addict boyfriend had really thrown him for an absolute loop when they had gone out to dinner on their backyard and he had gone down on one knee. It was all impossible, but then Wylan said yes and the impossible became possible. And with this orphanage now open, even that had become possible.

For that reason, he supposed it wasn’t that impossible to have all of the people that had survived the most dangerous heist ever to be conceived by anyone to be sitting around the fire ready to open presents.

“Okay,” Nina announced finally, “Me first. So as tradition dictates. Whoever picked first has to give the present first. If I remember correctly, Matthias picked a name. Okay, my dear Fjerdan, who’d you have?”

“Uh,” Matthias said hesitantly. He pulled out a long, rectangular box from behind him and kept his eyes on the present. “I-uh-I didn’t know what else to get you, um, Inej.” The girl in question raised her eyebrows in surprise and stood up from the window, “But, I hope you find it suitable.”

Inej walked over and opened the box slowly. Wylan watched as Inej smiled gratefully as she pulled out a beautiful double-edged knife with a white marble handle.

“It’s of Fjerdan make,” Matthias explained his face flushing, “The inscription is from-uh- Fjerdan saint and uh-”

“Thank you,” Inej interrupted and further surprised the bulky man with a hug.

Matthias smiled in relief and returned the gesture.

“Splendid, Jesper you’re next.” Nina said.

“Ah, finally,” Jesper grinned widely as he separated his hand from Wylan’s. He dug around in his pants pocket and produced two small boxes. Wylan recognized the smile that was lighting up his face and he felt his insides swirl at whatever his husband had decided to gift their friend.

“Now, dearest Nina, since you only deserve the best. I hope these will suffice.” He tossed both boxes at her and she caught them deftly, “Though, I think one of those might actually be for Helvar.”

Curious, Nina opened the first box and positively giggled as she held up a scrap of black lace lined with a blood red border. If Matthias’s face was red before, it was practically boiling now. Even Wylan felt a slight blush creep around his neck.

“Ah, Jes, you shouldn’t have.” She held out the undergarments out for everyone to see and slyly glanced at her Fjerdan, “Think of all the things we could do with this, sweet.”

Matthias looked away fast and everyone laughed at his reaction.

Still giggling Nina unwrapped Jesper’s second present and the smile that settled on her face was far more genuine and real than Wylan had ever seen on her. “Jesper Llewelyn, how did you get this?”

Nina held up a thin chain up from the box and revealed a beautiful sun charm. It glinted against the fire light warmly, and had a clear jewel in the middle. 

Jesper shrugged, “I was in Little Ravka in the other day, and I happened to befriend a very talented Fabrikator. He insists it’s the purest form of gold out there.”

“Thank you,” Nina said.

“You’re welcome,” Jesper smiled back.

Wylan couldn’t help but reach back for his hand. It was so rare to see him this comfortable with anyone else or with any other group of people. He was never comfortable with any of the men that Wylan did business with and all of Jesper’s other friends lived far too close to the gambling halls. So to see him so happy made Wylan’s heart flutter in his chest.

The night went on and with each unwrapping came a surprised shock of actually receiving a perfect gift. Inej gave Jesper finely crafted holsters for his guns. Nina gave Wylan a Grisha made flute, that Jesper insisted he played for everyone. He obliged and marveled at the artistry of the instrument and the clear and pure notes that emanated from it. Then came for Kaz to give his gift and Wylan couldn’t deny the sudden shift of mood as they all waited for Kaz to come back from wherever he went to fetch his gift.

“Alright, Helvar,” Kaz reentered the room with a hefty box under his arm, “This was hell to try to get, but try not to kill it.”

He all but shoved the box at Matthias’s lap and went back to his seat by the fire. The other boy looked curiously at the plain box curiously.

Matthias’s furrowed brow quickly rose up as whatever in the box made a loud bark. Nina peered in and her mouth dropped in an almost comical O shape.

“How-what-I-” Matthias stammered as he lifted a gray and white pup out of the container.

Wylan gaped at the small creature that was now sniffing at Matthias curiously and even dared to nibble at the giant’s thumb. It let out a small whimper before Nina instinctively stroked it behind its ears. 

“He is adorable! Look at him!” She squealed.

Kaz shrugged, “I did a favor for a Fjerdan a while back, and I had a pack delivered to me for security reasons. As it happens, I had a litter of these runts running around and I kept a couple before getting rid of the rest.”

“By ‘getting rid’ do you mean a quick trip down the canal?” Jesper said hesitantly.

“Ugh,” Nina shivered, not taking her eyes off the dog, “Please don’t answer that, Brekker, I don’t want to hear the truth or the potential lie.”

Kaz’s lip twitched, but he stayed silent.

Matthias’s bewildered blue gaze met Kaz for a moment before he stammered out a quick, “Thank you, demji.”

A bemused expression settled in Kaz’s eyes before he saluted him in acknowledgement. 

The puppy was yawning and Wylan could have laughed at the sight of such a small thing nestled in Matthias’s large hand. And if Wylan was completely honest with himself, he could have laughed at the fact that Kaz had even thought of being so considerate. That he went out of his way to think of something Matthias would actually want-- that his gift was so small, fluffy, and....wholesome. 

“What are you going to name him?” Wylan asked finally.

Matthais looked down at the animal and nuzzled his face with its snout, “I’m going to name him Trassel....after a good friend of mine.”

Nina peered into the blue and black eyes of the puppy, and cooed to it, “Hi, Trassel. Welcome to the family.”

The dog barked cheerfully at that and settled to rubbing his face against Matthias’s hand.

After a few moments all eyes turned towards Wylan who had yet to give his present.

“Ah, right,” He said, suddenly feeling nervous. He got up from his seat and went behind the curtain to retrieve the long rectangular box. His stomach fluttered with anxiety as he made his way back to the circle of his friends. It wasn’t so much the giving of the present, but knowing what the recipient might do with the gift gave him a slight pause. But as he neared Kaz, he shrugged away the discomfort. 

“Here you go, Kaz, hopefully it’ll serve as a good backup.” 

Kaz took the box hesitantly, and ripped open the box. Wylan held his breath as he delicately lifted a cane. The handle was shaped like a crow about to take flight, and its dark-wood finely engraved with jagged lines, and its tip tapered into a fine point. 

“It’s-” Wylan started to explain in the midst of Kaz’s silence, “It’s Grisha made so it shouldn’t break when there’s a substantial amount of force applied. And- if you twist the handle-”

Before Wylan finished the thought, Kaz twisted the handle and the pointed end of the cane opened up and the neutral expression Kaz had kept on his face disappeared. He smiled as he examined the turned cane and the new opening of the cane.

“You made me a gun.” There was a slight hint of a laugh in his voice. 

“Wylan, my dear,” Jesper said looking amused and concerned all at once, “Did you just give the most deadly man in the barrel a weapon that is not only as strong as his current cane, but also a gun?”

He shrugged and tried to fight the smugness working its way in his chest at Kaz’s reaction to his gift. He had his own reservations when he had come up with the plans as soon as he knew who he had gotten for this secret gift exchange. Wylan had debated about it for a full day before he had drawn up the plans and then set up a meeting with Ketterdam’s few Fabrikators. There were always going to be monsters in Ketterdam, those with longer and sharper teeth, and he supposed it wouldn’t hurt having one of those monsters as an ally and providing him with one more tooth.

“Well, Wylan,” Kaz’s grin was the widest he’s ever seen on him, “I will say, you never cease to surprise me.”

He twisted the handle restoring the cane to its proper form. 

At this Wylan did smile at Kaz. That was the closest thing to a compliment he’s given him in recent years and even if he had stopped working with the Dregs, there was still a small part of Wylan that couldn’t forget about his past. That feeling of doing a job well done or even earning a place in Kaz’s crew. 

And as the night continued on, with people playing with their presents in anyway they could, whether that be taking turns holding Trassel or making Wylan play or Nina offering to teach them some Ravkan games, Wylan couldn’t help but marvel at the warmth and radiating from the people around him. And when he noticed that Kaz had managed to slip away quietly, he decided that they needed this-- all of them. 

The crew who broke into the Ice Court, brought down a member of the Merchant Council, conned multiple countries, and fabricated their own plague, needed a chance to feel like the world wasn’t always escaping the past or fighting for their future. That for once they could sit around a fire with warm drinks in their bellies and live in the present.

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[catsundercherryblossoms]

|Ch. 14: Save Him, Save Her| Her Forgotten Past // Attack on Titan Fanfiction

Why does life have to be this way. Why does it give you everything, and then take it away? Levi could never understand this concept. But it always, always came around to bite the Survey Corps in the ass.

They were so close. Victory had grazed their fingertips, only to fall out of reach. The female titan called that horde of titans and had herself purposely devoured. At first, it puzzled every soldier who witnessed the sight. And rightly, it was quite the gruesome sight, the kind thats hard to erase from your memory. But Erwin, like always, was one step ahead of everybody.

"They escaped. The operator, the human inside the Titan, got away from us. Right under our noses." He had said as he, Levi, and a team of soldiers rode through the forest. They searched worriedly, desperately, hopelessly for the culprit.

Levi might've appeared fearless and unshakeable on the outside, but on the inside, he wasn't sure how much more he could take. So much effort and so many sacrifices, only for the convict to get away. This whole mission was a giant screw up.

A piercing roar. They all snapped their heads towards the sound. The whole forest shuddered as it reverberated from tree to tree.

There were two Titan shifters in the vicinity: the female titan and Eren. But only one of them was capable of a raging, lunatic scream like that. It was all too hot-tempered, and all too familiar...

Eren.

Levi flew off his horse, not bothering to tell Erwin where he was going. He didn't need to. They were all thinking the same thing: Eren wasn't allowed to transform unless absolutely necessary. Why would it be necessary?

But Levi began to get an inkling why.

Despite these suspicions, nothing could have prepared him for the horrible path ahead as he followed the distant roaring. First was Günther... Hanging upside down, bloody, eyes open but not seeing, Levi instantly knew he was dead. He proceeded. Next was Eld. Well, part of him. The rest was nowhere to be found, most likely swallowed. Levi tried to ignore the red stains on the grass and continued. Oluo wasn't spared either. After ten minutes of more flying around, Levi found him face down in the ground, mouth open with the ghost of his last scream still on his face. Levi did not dwell, although he noticed his heart felt heavier than before. Before all of this. Perhaps there was still hope. Petra was a highly skilled soldier, very independent, and very capable-

She was slumped against a tree. Blood smeared on her cheek. Like Günther, her eyes remained open just a peak, but absolutely lifeless. Dead.

Four beautiful people. A whole squad of the finest soldiers... wiped out.

He no longer heard Eren's monstrous roars. They had stopped. He heard only footsteps now, and far away, if he squinted enough past the trees, he could see a muscled pink figure running away. It was not Eren, but instead the female titan. And she probably had the boy with her.

Levi wanted to chase after her, but he couldn't bring himself to do it, not until he knew where she was. Jet-black hair and blue eyes duller than the barrel of a gun. Where was she?

Levi's heart was now picking up speed. It thumped in his chest and it physically and emotionally hurt. He looked around frantically. Surely, she's alive. There's no way she can't be.

But then again... that's what he thought about his squad. Now look at them.

His eyes skimmed over the clearing, searching the grass, the rocks, the trees, until finally he spotted something. At first it looked to be an ordinary mossy rock, but a upon second observation he realized it was actually a Survey Corps cloak, camouflaged against a bush. And someone was wearing it, sprawled on the ground.

Levi didn't hesitate. He landed on the ground and ran towards her. "Johanna!" His own voice sounded like another person's. A scared person's. He kneeled and flipped her over to discover blood all on the left side of her face. It was fairly dry. How long had she been unconscious? Or worse... dead?

He took her pulse and felt a wave of relief. No, definitely unconscious. His rapid heart eased comfortably again. God, the universe, whatever higher power up there spared him this one. And although he reeled with grief of the others, he was thankful that she survived.

He shook her shoulders gently, trying to get her to wake up. "Johanna... Come on, dammit. Talk to me!"

She stirred. Her eyelids opened a crack, those dull blue irises peeking out from underneath. She was weak, he could tell. The focus in her gaze was fazing in and out. Inconsistent. "What... Corporal?"

"Yes, brat." He said, but there was a softness in his deep voice. Lines of consternation formed on his forehead. "Your head's bleeding. What happened?"

For a moment, she seemed brainless. Levi wondered if she had heard him. But then her eyes widened in terror, glazed over as she remembered. "We were overwhelmed. The squad, they- they tried their best, but..." She gulped. "She was too strong. Next thing I know they're all dead. Eren turned into a titan and tried to take her on, but he was defeated..." A single crystalline tear rolled down her cheek. She continued, choked. "I tried to stop her from running away with him but I wasn't careful enough- and- and she pulled on my wires and I hit a tree. Now he's gone!" She fisted his collar desperately. "We need to get him back, we have to save him!"

"There's not much we can do. Its too late for him." Levi said grimly.

She tried taking in these words, but they went in one ear and out the other. "No! We cant just let him get taken away, we have to-!"

"Didn't you hear what I just said?" He cut her off. "Its too late. My whole squad has been wiped out! Anybody with a brain knows that the best choice is to return to the walls and come up with a plan there."

"He'll be dead by the time we do that! You know what? Forget it." That was enough. She pushed him off and got up, stumbling as she regained her footing. "I'll go by myself. He would do the same for me. Actually, he did once." She said, recalling the time they were on that training corps mission out in the desert and she got kidnapped. "I'll kill that bitch on my own. Who knows? Maybe I'll come back with the Eren and the titan shifter!" She started doing an assessment check on her gear. It was pretty banged up, but everything still functioned.

Levi's patience was running thin. "You're delusional! You can't do it alone!"

"Watch me!"

"Wait!" He stopped her just as she made to fly off. For a few seconds it was quiet, the female titan's footsteps barely audible now. He then sighed. "Fine. But I'm coming with you. And in case you've forgotten," He approached her. They stared at each other frigidly. "I'm the one in charge here. So do everything I tell you, and only what I tell you. Got it?"

She bit the inside of her cheek, but nodded in compliance.

"Alright. Let's go."

It took them about fifteen minutes just to catch up with the female titan. They followed behind her. She had expert stamina, running as though she were in a marathon.

"Is he in her mouth?" Levi asked.

"Yes." Johanna said, glaring daggers at her back. She yearned to just swoop in and get it over and done with. But they had to maintain their distance. Her movements were sudden and almost incalculable.

Levi's brow furrowed. "How do you know he's not dead? If she bit his nape-"

"He's still alive in there. This Titan shifter has a purpose. If she wanted to kill Eren, she could've just crushed him. She needs him for something. But she also needs her hands to fight. So she's been holding him in her tongue. It's common sense."

"Or maybe she just wanted to savor her prey. In which case, he's probably been swallowed already. If so-"

"He's alive." She emphasized. Her expression had never been more fierce.

"Tch." He rolled his eyes. "Someone's optimistic."

Johanna took her eyes off the female titan and glared at him now. "Listen here, buddy. If you had just done your damn job and protected him like you're supposed to, we wouldn't be having this conversation in the first place!"

That's when it dawned on him. He cocked his head to look at her. The 'oh' moment was visible on his face. How did he not notice it before? Figures.

He faced her completely. His tone was somewhere between sly and repulsed. "I see what's going on here. Three years of cadet training, little stolen moments during lunch, sneaking out after curfew... It's all making sense now."

Johanna wasn't sure what he was implying. Actually, she did know. She knew all too well. But she hated being ridiculed. Her scowl deepened. She would've blushed if it wasn't for the immense life or death situation they were currently in.

"Right. For the sake of getting shit done, let's narrow down our goals. We forget about killing her." He indicated to the female titan jogging in front of them.

"No way. She's killed way too many soldiers to get away with that. She's dead." Johanna said.

"She's got defenses that none of us have been trained to deal with. Not even me. I'm telling you, it's a lost cause." He raised a blade, his reflection glinting on the shiny surface. "Instead, we act on your assumption that Eren is still alive. We'll focus only on getting him back before she leaves the forest. Thats all we're doing. I'll do all the cutting. You try to distract her."

"Got it."

Johanna didn't hesitate. She didn't even wait for him to say go. She sped off to engage the female titan. She flew in front of her gigantic feet. The female Titan's icy blue eyes peered down at her, surprised. Distracted. Just how they wanted her to be. Levi readied his blades.

The female titan, quickly catching on to what they were planning, took the contrary. She sensed Levi was right behind her and she swerved around, aiming a powerful punch at his body.

Ha. As if that would be successful.

Levi dodged it, and now that her arm was extended, he whirled his way up, slashing and shredding the skin like a tornado. When he finally stopped, his blades were fully covered in Titan blood, which instantly began to steam. He dived in again and cut her up, even going for her eyes. The torture was brutal to the point where she had no other choice than to stop, leaning against a tree for support. Her eyes were blinded. Her shoulders falling from their sockets. The ankles and knees were rendered useless. There was nothing she could do but wait and regenerate now.

Johanna watched in slight awe. The finished product was quite impressive.

That's when she noticed something. She stopped in mid air. Her nape is completely open! She thought, staring at the pink flesh just waiting to be carved into. She itched to find out who the hell was hiding in there. This is it! Now's my chance!

Johanna flew towards the nape at breakneck speed, raising her blades high and mighty. So close... the tips of her fingers, curled around the blades, buzzed with electricity. The anticipation was so unbearable, she-

"NO! DON'T DO IT!"

A shadow loomed over Johanna. She was barely given two seconds. But two seconds was all it took. She looked up and the first thing she registered was the female titan's hand about to swat her. Then, out of nowhere Levi came and shoved her aside and out of danger.

Johanna fell about fifteen feet before she finally pulled herself together. She shot an anchor into a nearby tree to keep her from hitting the ground, but as she hung there, the shock still hadn't left her body. Somewhere deep inside she knew she messed up. Big time.

She watched Levi. He landed improperly on the titan's hand, forcing it back with his feet.

Crack!

'Fuck, was that what I think it was?' Johanna thought.

Yep. It certainly was. Levi's foot had twisted the wrong way. He grimaced in pain, but seemed to ignore the injury and proceeded to slash the female titan's mouth. Her jaw popped open, tongue lolling out, and finally, there was Eren. Levi wasted no time and grabbed him. Together, he and Johanna took off.

"Talk about a screw up. What did I tell you? You shouldn't have tried to kill her!" Levi said. He carried Eren in one arm. He was an unconscious, slimy and disgusting mess. But he seemed okay overall.

Johanna gritted her teeth. She wanted to be angry at Levi, but the truth is, she could only be angry at herself. "I didn't mean to, okay? I just-"

"Look, we get that he's your boyfriend. Just try not to act crazy next time."

"I- ugh, that's not..." Johanna didn't have the energy to explain herself at the moment. She couldn't care less what he thought. Right now, all that mattered was Eren's safety. And until they weren't out of this goddamn forest, she wouldn't be satisfied.

Out of curiosity, Johanna stole one last look behind her. What she saw, however, was beyond shocking...

There lay the female titan, against a tree, body regenerating slowly. And she was...

Crying.

End of Chapter 14