#thats how i feel trying to take care of my brain rn

[wildflowerteas]

TSP 2 Week Hiatus ( so sorry )

[opens-up-4-nobody]

...

[silverislander]

i know logically in my brain that i have a disorder that makes it hard for me to focus and do work, the symptoms of which are not gonna go away bc other people need/want me to do stuff, and still like. i'm behind on a bunch of shit for school rn and i'm kind of spiralling over it bc WHY IS IT HARD. this is stuff i like doing and that i want to do. and i can't for the life of me fucking do it and the deadlines are coming up and i NEED TO FUCKING GRADUATE so it has to get done

[another-emotional-wreck]

i cant wait to leave this house lmao

[python333]

task force 141 reacting to [reader] clinging to them — python333

— — — —

synopsis just as the title says bb!! just some headcanons of the boys reacting to the reader clinging to them and basically following them around like a lost puppy!

relationships platonic!tf141 & reader.

characters cap. price, soap, ghost, gaz.

warnings written in 2nd person pov [you/your/yourself], usage of c/n [code name/call sign], non-scottish reader [or could be read as scottish with less of an accent], probably ooc :{

note this is so. self indulgent. BUT i need to get my thoughts out rn about these boys because its too much to contain my silly little brain won't let this go and i need to just hdjhsdfjdhj. if anyone wants to request something for me to write pls do it because this is the only thing thats gotten me out of my writers block.

JOHN "BRAVO SIX" PRICE

➥ i honestly don’t even think he’d notice at first.

➥ about a week after you’d gotten to know everyone on the team and started to get used to their quirks, you decide your target to cling onto is gonna be price… because why not?

➥ when i say cling i mean following him around like a lost puppy, just about watching his every move, basically being his shadow.

➥ it’s not until about three days of you doing this when he realizes you’re shadowing him.

➥ when he confronts you about it, it’s less of a confrontation and more like him saying “... do you need something?” and then brushing it off when you shake your head ‘no’.

➥ he’s not really irritated or angry about it, more confused but generally okay with it.

➥ so when he realizes you’re gonna be doing this often, he can’t tell whether he should feel honored or bothered.

➥ spoilers: he ends up feeling honored. it’s his fatherly instincts, y’all already know.

➥ he’s awkward about it at first, now that he actually knows you’re following him, he’s constantly checking over his shoulder and — yep, you’re still there.

➥ so he doesn’t confront you about it again, and just lets you follow him around, and once y’all get closer he teases you for following him around like a duckling would with its mother.

—

You’d been following Price around for a few days now. He hadn’t noticed so far, thank God, but he was definitely close to finding out. You could see the way he’d occasionally glance over his shoulder and see you following him, then keep eye contact with you for a moment before going on with his day — which really confused you at first, but who cares as long as he’s not stopping you? — and letting you follow him.

You had been following him out of habit. You didn’t mean to follow him in particular, it just… happened. Something about his demeanor, you’d convinced yourself, He just feels safe. It’s inexplicable and we will not be diving into my underlying issues to figure out why he feels safe.

So when he’d confronted you about it—or, asked you about it is probably more accurate—with a questioning tone and the words, “Did you need something?”, you shook your head ‘no’, and that was that. The older man had looked at you for another second, eyes looking over your expression as if trying to read you like a book, then went on with his day. You had let out a sigh of relief, and continued your little routine of following him around and being his little shadow.

—

JOHN “SOAP” MACTAVISH

➥ he’s such a silly guy, man.

➥ he’d notice but pretend he didn’t, just for the sake of seeing how long you’ll follow him.

➥ if anyone points out your presence he’ll ignore it and change the subject.

➥ of course, once he realizes you aren’t letting up your clinginess, he confronts you about it in the most professional way possible!

➥ “Do ye trail everyone ‘round like that, or am I jist special?”

➥ it takes you a moment to figure out what he just said because holy fuck that accent is THICK.

➥ but you figure it out after a quick moment of thinking and struggle to respond, before offering a quiet, “... Uh. I guess you’re just special?”

➥ he is very happy about this.

➥ he nods approvingly and goes on with his day, letting you trail behind him.

➥ he really doesn’t mind, and actually enjoys having you trail behind him.

—

Following around Soap was more of a challenge than you’d intended. It was fun, for the most part, and you liked that he didn’t acknowledge you at all. The main reason you had kept following him was because he didn’t bother you at all, and didn’t even glance back at you as you followed him, no, he simply let you follow him around and shadow him all day.

Of course, you still had training and practice, but the moment you had gotten out of the showers and were done for the day, you’d gone back to following Soap, once you’d found him. Your daily routine was basically: wake up, eat breakfast, follow Soap, go to the training room and follow your CO’s orders, shower and eat lunch or dinner, find Soap, follow Soap, sleep, repeat.

Then one day, on a particularly idle day, Soap had turned to you and popped the question — “Do ye trail everyone ‘round like this, or am I jist special?”

Maybe you were just being dramatic, but holy fuck , his accent made it almost sound like he was speaking a whole different language. You process his words for a moment, before responding with a quiet, “Uh… I guess you’re just special?”

He seemed pretty satisfied with that answer and never really bothered you with it again.

—

SIMON “GHOST” RILEY

➥ he realizes immediately and ohhh boyyyyyy.

➥ “Do you need something?” “Did you need something?” “Why are you following me?” “Stop following me.” “Do you need something?”

➥ he is. Very bothered.

➥ constantly looking over his shoulder just to find your annoying ass following him.

➥ will always ask you why you’re following him, and when you shrug or give a bullshit excuse, he gives an exasperated sigh and goes on with his day.

➥ sometimes he’d even try to lose you in the crowd, and when you miraculously continue to follow him through it, he’d somehow become even more miserable. it’s impressive, your dedication to following him around like this.

➥ he’ll warm up to it eventually, maybe a month or two after you’ve started following him.

➥ by month one he’ll stop constantly asking you why you’re following him, and by month two he’ll stop constantly glancing over his shoulder.

➥ and eventually, he’ll stop trying to lose you in the crowds, and instead look for the easiest way to get through them with you trailing behind him.

—

Ghost should’ve known from the moment you persisted with your following of him through thick and thin that you’d never give this up. Honestly, it’s impressive how dedicated you are to trailing behind him like a little shadow, never even speaking to him, just following him.

However, Ghost could persist as well.

You’d follow him around as much as possible, starting at the break of dawn and briefly pausing your following to do whatever training your CO instructed and then resuming your following till curfew. Day after day, Ghost would interrupt your following by questioning it, then when given an answer, he’d give an exasperated sigh and storm off, not waiting for you to catch up.

At first, he thought you wanted to win over some sort of attention or affection from him. So, he made sure not to give you any. He didn’t spare a single moment for you, besides glancing at you over his shoulder and questioning your presence, and yet you continued to follow him. So he experimented with it a bit — he didn’t spare a single glance at you one day, didn’t speak to you one bit, didn’t do anything. Just went around as if you weren’t there. And yet, you continued to follow him, not put off by his behavior at all.

So, he just stopped thinking too much about you, in the nicest way possible. He wouldn’t glance back at you and question your presence, but he also wouldn’t try and lose you around the base. He wouldn’t storm off and leave you running to catch up. Sometimes, he even forgets you’re there at all. He warms up to it, albeit after a few months, but he still warms up to it nonetheless.

—

KYLE “GAZ” GARRICK

➥ i think he’d notice fairly quickly but wouldn’t point it out right away.

➥ like, he’d glance over his shoulder and see you following him, but gaslights himself into thinking you’re just trying to get to the same place he is, so he doesn’t confront you about it or anything.

➥ so when he realizes that you’re following him and not just trying to get to the same place he is, he’s kind of weirded out, but still doesn’t confront you.

➥ he’ll ask soap for some help on what to do and the damn idiot just goes ‘[c/n] probably has a crush on you’ so now gaz thinks you have a crush on him.

➥ i mean, he’s flattered, but also he has no idea who you are, so…

➥ he’s now even more awkward.

➥ so then he goes to price for help,

➥ and price is just a tinge more reasonable.

➥ price tells gaz that you’re probably just shadowing him because you see him as some sort of mentor, or maybe there was someone in your past that was similar to gaz and you followed them around as well.

➥ his reasoning doesn’t help all that much, because what the fuck is gaz supposed to do with that, but whatever.

➥ he really doesn’t know what to do about you, to be honest.

➥ after way too long, he asks you why you’re following him.

➥ and when you shrug or give an excuse as to why you’ve been trailing behind him ever since you’ve gotten here, he shrugs back and goes on with his day.

➥ doesn’t mind all that much, so yippee!!

➥ eventually, when you two get closer, he tells you that you can walk by his side instead of behind him.

—

Making Gaz your target was probably the best idea you’ve ever had.

He’s pretty quiet, doesn’t actively try to get you to go away, and best of all, he really just walks around and does any tasks he needs to. It’s oddly nice, just watching him do his work. He doesn’t talk to himself under his breath like Soap or Price does, and doesn’t do his work in complete silence like Ghost does. He’ll often hum to himself or whistle, a noise that’s quickly become weirdly comforting to you.

It’s kind of disappointing realizing you have to go off to training, honestly. Following Gaz around has quickly become the pinnacle of your day. Which sounds really sad now that you think of it, but who cares.

About a month of you following him later, he finally asks you why you’re following him. In the nicest way possible, of course.

“Is there a reason you’ve been following me around all month?”

When you shrug or give an excuse for your actions, he thinks about your words (or your wordless shrug) for a moment and mutters a quiet, “Alright, then,” and goes on with his day.

[sixx6sexx2love]

Can u do nikki x fem reader angst please im dying for some angst rn PLEASE

SORRY IVE BEEN SLACKING ON REQUESTS AND THIS IS MY FIRST TIME WRITING ANGST REALLY AND I WAS ALSO HIGH SO IT PROBABLY SUCKS.

word count: 1,301

warnings: drugs, alcohol, thats kinda it, mentions of sex once.

Nikki was starting to realize he was an addict. He didn't wanna spend 5,000 dollars a day on drugs. He didn't wanna shoot up every 30 minutes and nod off. he even missed his grandmas funeral because he chose to get high. A while back he and his girlfriend of well over a couple of years (not counting the numerous breakups) argued, she doesn't come around to their house as much, and Nikki hadn't talked to Vince, Tommy, or Mick in weeks and Nikki felt like he had nobody. he had another “girlfriend” who was just his drug buddy and used the excuse of being together just to shoot up. they didn't even have sex at all.

Nikki and the chick were on the couch. Nikki was either passed out or bearly awake. there were needles and spoons around them, Nikki still had the blue band around his arm as he was laid out on the couch.

you stumbled in the house for the first time in maybe 2 weeks. the house was still a mess from all the parties thrown but that was weeks ago. you went to find him and saw him in the living room with that girl and they both looked awful, you almost didn't know it was Nikki. you leaned against the archway with a bottle of liquor in your hand. "I'm going to Vegas." you told him. why? because you felt like going

Nikki could vaguely hear a familiar voice through the fog in his brain. He attempted to sit up against the arm of the couch, his eyes slowly opening as much as they could.

“What..?” he mumbled, his eyes glancing over at you as he slowly registered your presence. he couldn’t remember the last time he saw you.

"I'm going to Vegas." you repeated. Nikki looked awful. if you had seen him like this a couple of years ago you would've taken care of him making sure he was good as new. but you've done that for years and Nikki took it for granted. you got tired of taking care of him so you stopped when he needed it most.

Nikki watched you, his eyes barely open. he tried to gather his thoughts to say something to you, but his brain wasn’t working fast enough. a couple of years ago, if you had said the same thing he would’ve jumped up and asked why, worried that something was wrong. this time he just stayed where he was on the couch, watching you and slurring his words. “For how long..?” he mumbled, running a hand through his hair.

"I dunno." you answered. "til I feel like coming back." you said and took a swing from your bottle. not your first bottle of the night.

He tried to process what you said, but his mind felt muddled. He couldn’t remember the last time you had been around months ago. The last time he had seen you, you guys had ended up in a big fight.

“Don’t..you…” he trailed off, not even knowing what he was about to say. he ran a hand along his face again, trying to brush away the fog. “You’re ditching me…” he muttered.

"I'll be back." you mumbled and closed your eyes as you messed with your hair "You'll be fine.. m' not your mommy." you mumbled again little just from being drunk.

That made him scoff quietly, and he opened his eyes a little wider at that. He would’ve argued with you if his mind was clear. he would’ve said things like “I never said you were.” or “I don’t need you to be.” he would’ve said those things and fought with you like usual. But not right now. he was too out of it. “What if I want you to be..?” he mumbled into his hand.

you opened your eyes and looked at him for a few seconds. "then you're a few months too late." you said quietly. not softly, but quieter. it wasn't like him to ask something like that and it wasn't like you to answer like that, but we're changing and drifting apart. the whole band was. Tommy was married to Heather, no one spoke to Vince in prison, so he didn't speak to them, and no one ever knew where Mick was.

He frowned at your words and slowly sat up all the way, his eyes looking over at you. He hated hearing that from you, but he couldn’t bring himself to argue right now. not when he really wanted to. “A couple months too late..” he thought to himself. Had things really gotten this bad?

he looked down at his arms, the needle marks and old track marks were on full display. he then glanced back up at you. “I miss you..” he muttered.

you hum and looked at the ground while you were against the archway. you missed him too. a lot. but you've tried and tried for years taking care of him, loving him through everything, and he didn't do anything. you got sick of the one-way treatment. "yeah." you answered quietly.

He sighed and shut his eyes again, feeling a wave of guilt wash over him like it did every time he thought of you. he knew he hadn’t treated you like you deserved. not always. how many times had he gotten so high and said hurtful things that he didn’t mean? how many times had he gotten drunk and ignored you in favor of a party? He couldn’t even count on two hands the amount of times he caused you to cry. “I’m sorry..” he mumbled.

you felt a pang of guilt in your chest but you didn't say anything. you looked down at the bottle of liquor in your hand. what were you supposed to say? he knows you've forgiven him each time so what's this time gonna mean? "I have to pack." you told him.

Nikki stared at you, feeling a sense of hopelessness wash over him. he couldn’t blame you for leaving and had a feeling that you weren’t gonna come back. he had pushed you away so many times that he couldn’t expect you to come back.

he was silent for a few moments, not knowing what to say. a part of him wanted to ask you not to go, to beg you to stay and not leave him. but he didn’t say anything. he wasn’t in the right state of mind to.

when he didn't say anything you started walking to the stairs, your heeled boots clicked against the tile but were muted to a thud when you walked on the carpet stairs as his eyes followed you. He watched you disappear and head upstairs to your shared room, feeling an empty sort of pain in his chest. he stared down at his hands before he looked over at the girl sitting next to him. She just sat there in a daze, completely lost in a high. He wanted to get up and go up and stop you, to beg you to stay. his mouth opened like he was going to speak, but he didn’t say anything.

you went to your room that he was sharing with his drug buddy, the room was littered with needles and all kinds of things. it was a mess. you went into the closet, got a suitcase and threw whatever you had left in the closet in the suitcase and what his girlfriend hadn't taken. you took the suitcase downstairs.

you walked with the suitcase trailing behind you. and you looked back at the living room to tell Nikki goodbye, but when you looked at him he was already passed out with a needle in his arm. you looked at him for a couple more seconds before walking to the front door and leaving.

[yokakaiju]

i got bored and made a tierlist based off who smokes the most weed

justifications under cut

so like i made this cause its funny first and foremost, but i did put like somewhat actual thought into this. not much, but synapses were firing in my brain putting this together

also im not tagging everyone, ill just like pick 2 or whatevs

okay so first up is chidaruma. dude prolly invented weed ngl. you know he's smoked everyway imaginable: blunt, pipe, bong, can, apple, vape, synthesized, edible, hotbox, blower; you name it, he's done it. he's kinda over it, but he's still up there just cause like... idk he is and won't take criticism

haru is a beautiful weed smoking gf thats literally it

13's entire schedule is probably wake up, smoke, jerk off, sleep, eat, smoke, jerk off, eat, smoke, repeat. he also would probably kin jesse pinkman

ton is a bitch and smokes all the cross-eye commanders weed. like they'll save up for MONTHS to get like 5oz (one for each of them :3) and he'll be like, "woah! a bag of weed!" and smoke it ALLLLLL in like an hour. he's like a truffle pig for weed, they can try to hide it but his ass always finds it and smokes it all. he would prolly also call it za or skunk or some shit like that

ebisu isn't quite in the high 24/7 catagory, but she could be. dawg loves weed, like she is also 100% a fucking master at rolling blunts she rivals chidaruma at it. rolling blunts is like a sport for her tbh

aikawa's gotta cope dawg. like if he aint at school or currently being possed by demons his ass is smokin that shit bruh he needs a minute to chill. also he's got crazy money (kai's money but shhh) so he might as well spend it on his pookie <3 (risu)

noi may be controversial being up so high, but hear me out. weed smoking gf? i think yes B) mogs at you

asuka also has to cope, but its cause shes a blackpilled femcel (her own words i stg)

chota would smoke, but he hates the smell and doesn't want it to ruin his clothes and shit. he prolly wears like silk gowns and dances around to madonna while trippin off like 10g. he's livin the life tbh

OKAY HEAR ME OUT HEAR ME OUT HEAR ME OUT johnston. fucking johnston is only i repeat ONLY UP HERE‼️ because kasukabe gives him those little non thc thc pills people give to dogs with anxiety and agression issues to keep him calm

poor dokuga cant share with his besties so he's been condemed to eating edibles alone... also smoking/inhaling smoke makes him drool a bit so like a bit deadly for everyone around him to even try. i like, debated on putting him in never, but tetsujo prolly cooks smth up for him so he doesn't feel left out <3

natsuki is only at the top of sometimes because she probably would more if she had money. also she sucks in a blunt rotation cause her ass ALWAYS WITHOUT FAIL tries to hold it in and always coughs like a mfer and taps out after like one hit

vaux just makes sense. he looks like an average 30-40smth nu metal oldhead, theres no way he DOESNT smoke at least a little. id put him in 100% but he's also a fairly responsible doctor so liek idk

kasukabe doesnt as much anymore, mostly only when he's with haru, but he still does sometimes for funsies cause he's just chiil like that :3

tetsujo doesn't thattt much cause it fucks with his already dog shit depth perception super bad, but sometimes if ton or the others dont find it he shares it with dokuga and they like yuri pose and eat edibles together or smth idk

ik kaiman is gonna be controversial being so low, but listen. 1) his ass is too focused on socerers and shit to care 2) he's dirt poor. he simply cannot afford it 3) how tf is he gonna smoke with no lips? that blunt would just get chewed to shit. like genuinely he would maybe get one singular edible if nikaido or vaux were feeling nice, but other than that its like, idk almost never for him

i would but shin in never, but ik noi is like "boss!!!! come take hits off this bong with me!! its gonna be so sick omg you HAVE to come smoke with me RN!!!!" and he'd be like "sighhhhhh... anything for my weed smoking gf ig..."

ushishimada is only so low cause i feel like he's too mothery to smoke a lot? like, he's too responsible, but not responsible enough to outright say no. also they're poor asf and ton always smokes it all

fukuyama would get his ass kicked by tanba if he found out, but ik dawgs gotta take a load off sometimes tbh

now again, controversial take but i have reasons. risu is so fucking poor. like, genuinely he is too worried about his tuition, bills, and groceries to give af about it (also cause aikawa is a bitch and makes him pay for everything cause "i forgot my wallet oopsie :3c"). now aikawa does supply him tho and he hooks him up with the primo shit ong. so at least when he does smoke he smokes that good shit (also they yuri pose as well while they smoke)

again, saji is too mommy to smoke that much weed (also another case of being too poor). bro doesn't want his clothes and needlework to smell like shit, which i respect

ai 100% would if his ass wasnt so busy with his damn self expiramentation bs. like, he wants to smoke so bad tbh, but he's like "sigh i gotta work on my plans to rebuild my body from the ground up.. maybe tomorrow" stares longingly out the window imagining how cool smoking weed is

again, kai's over here fuckin "i have to go to work" like he genuinely just doesn't care or have time. he's never even thought about it tbh, like you're tellin me this mfer has had a single thought outside of total domination in his entire existance??? HELL NAH HIS ASS DOES NOT THINK HE HAS ZERO THOUGHTS IN HIS HEAD I STG

now this may also be controversial. why isn't by beautiful coquette cottagecore angelcore babe out there rolling and smoking the fattest blunts known to man? turkey just like doesnt feel it. its not for her tbh. she tried smoking, she tried edibles. she just wasnt a fan tbh. like, she'll cook up some of the tastiest edibles you've ever had if you ask, but she just aint a fan

kirion also just doesn't feel it tbh. again, its not for her and thats alright

wow surprise surprise another controversial take. like, before you get mad just think abt it for a sec. like, she's so fucking business first and always has been that i think she would just see it as a major hinderance on her job performance, as well as the performance of her employees later down the line. now im not saying she's a narc or hardass about it, im saying she just doesn't feel it. the high she gets from people enjoying her food and making money is enough for her tbh. also she does do edibles sometimes, but mostly like when it rains in hole to make it a little less miserable and painful

en is about the same. like, he def has. he's just like, idk. he doesnt wanna. its not for him anymore. he doesn't care if anyone in the family does it, but they better not sacrifice the quality of their work for it. like if he catches you high on the job its prolly like some sort of repremanding, but off the clock he dont gaf

genuinely copy paste nikaidos shit for tanba. he's too worried about his business to even consider smoking weed

now... kawajiri is a fucking narc and a half. his ass would be like "erm ☝️🤓 well actually" and then give a big long speech about how weed is bad blah blah blah whatever no one cares dawg stop fuckin yappin. but like, he's just pissed cause no one will smoke with him or share their weed with him cause he's such a hardass

fujita is kinda weed smoking gf coded, but like ik his ass would be like "EN! EN! I SAW EBISU SMOKING A BLUNT THE SIZE OF HER OWN FOREARM AND TRYING TO SHARE IT WITH KIKURAGE!!! YOU NEED TO STOP HER RN!!!!" but hes only like this cause when he was in a blunt roation with shin, noi, and ebisu they all told him holding it in made you higher, but he ended up puking and they all laughed at him and made fun of him for it because hes a fucking idiot. so now he's an evil little narc who squeals to en when he even catches a whiff of a skunk like scent

curse is a bitch and ik his ass is like "RAAAHHHH‼️ I GOTTA GO KILL THE CROSS-EYES BOSS RAHHH‼️ I NEED TO SEEK REVENEGE FOR MY MURDER RAHHHHHH‼️" like dawg chill tf out be so real rn. he's too focused on revenge and shit to smoke and like, i think if he did smoke and kai also smoked they'd have beautiful hot sexy yaoi, thats just me tho

oh my god shou is such a bitch about it. like sure kawajiri gives lectures about the "scary true reality of weed" and fujita is a narc, but this guy. oh my god this mfer. THIS IS THE REAL REASON EVERYONE FORGOT ABOUT HIM ITS CAUSE THEY KNOW HIS ASS IS GONNA WHINE AND BITCH AND MAKE YOU GO TO LIKE AA OR NA OR WHATEVER FOR IT!!!! HE'LL START CALLIN YOI AND ADDICT AND SAYIN ITS A GATEWAY AND SHIT AND HOW THE DEVILS WILL IMMEDIATLY DRAG YOI TO HELL AND TORTURE YOU FOREVER IF YOU EVEN THINK ABOUT IT OH MY BALLS

kikurage is literally just a dog dawg. her ass dont even know what weed is

store crow mauler is like... idk man. idk how it would smoke weed or if it even knows or cares what weed is. whatever, its kinds like a pet so whatevs

[redr0sewrites]

HIIIII!!! (same anon who first asked for the sub vox hcs WHICH. BTW. WERE SOOO YUMMY your brain is HUUUGGE!!)

i know your probably SWARMED with requests rn so i wont do that to you however your recent dry humping thing is ROTTING MY BRAAIIN so im coming here to ramble.!.!.!

Hear Me Out: thigh riding vox, but not in the way you think ohh nonono… its used as a cruel way to tease. slowly dragging yourself on him, denying him of such pleasure. i can only imagine how he would sound as he would beg for you, how he would try to buck his hips into your knee thats so painfully close to his hard on. the delicious sight of him squirming beneath you as you move faster, his claws digging into your hips. (or, if you wanna be extra mean and command that hes not allowed to touch you, he would dig into the nearest surface!!)

AAALL i’ve been thinking about is voxs whines and whimpers as you make yourself cum on his thigh, feeling satisfied when you look down and see the oh-so powerful overlord looking so desperate and needy, begging that you take care of him. i mean… cmon, don’t you want something better? hasn’t he been so good?

anyways, hoping you’ve enjoyed the visions that have been plaguing me.!!!.. keep up the good work!! your a great writer <33

AUGHGHH TYYYY?????? THIS IS PURE GOLD OMGGGGGGGG TYSM FOR THIS LMAO NOW I WANNA WRITE IT-

PLSSS HED BE SO DESPERATE ABOUT IT TOO, HE LOVES TO BELIEVE HE HAS CONTROL WHEN REALITY HE DOESNT, HED BOUNCE HIS LEG AND CLAW AT YOUR HIPS AND BEEEGGGG FOR U TO TOUCH HIM URGRHRGR

[sugar-omi]

omg ok so I kno u busy rn w ktober but like I just had a thought and I want u to hear it 🤭

high libido!mc who is sexually frustrated because cove is away on a business trip and no matter how hard they try mc just can’t get themselves off

like hand or toys just can NOT do it for them because they’re so used to having cove around to help them and nothing can compare to him

and cove comes home from his business trip and finds them desperately masturbating on the bed, crying from frustration and they’re like

“this is ur fault I can’t cum without u” w big watery eyes and a pout and yeah cove takes them right there 🫣 he prolly moaning in their ear abt how he missed them too

help the period horny is so crazy rn ur rlly feeding me w kinktober take care don’t burn urself out trying to keep up w the numbers 🫶🏽

-🗑️

AWE TYSM🫶🫶 im pre-writing some stuff n a lotta stuff is already written, plus i can tell you rn the ones w multiple boys for example will be short, so i'll be okay!!! ty for thinking abt me tho thats so sweet <333 MWAH also period horny is so different... thats fueling me rn

ALSO I THINK ABOUT THIS ALL THE TIME

especially after the first time they have sex, like the patreon moment or the time they go all the way especially

its so hard now that you've had a taste of cove, his fingers, tongue, his dick. even though he's not skilled he's still so cute, and the experience is so intense since he's your lover

you'd actually give him a confidence boost n yk how cove gets kinda sassy sometimes, like for example say at fond when he jokes abt marrying liz? he's like that for hoursss

sometimes he remembers seeing you so desperate on the bed, your toys abandoned at your side and your fingers making work of your sex but you're so unsatisfied, even if you finish it doesn't feel as good as when cove makes you finish

n he'll tease you when he finally fucks you, between him fingering n giving you head and now mocking you with "aw, is this what you've been waiting for~?", you're brought to tears

pls this is so good... he'd hold you from behind or lean over you, holding your hands, and tells you how pretty you are, how much he missed you, how he wished you were there to get him off after a stressful business dinner with some big client.

even if you sext or call n have phone sex, it's just not the same n makes you guys miss each other so much more...

please you unleashed my biggest brain worms

[lains-reality]

the hardest i keep trying to remain uninterested towards my thoughts and reaffirm that im awareness only and not the ego the more i feel angry that absolutely nothing is happening, not even feeling peace or fulfillment or anything, probably because i went into nd thinking its the same thing as loa and just wanting to get things but rn im done trying to convince myself that i dont care what my thoughts or my reality is, i dont know what to do about any of this anymore because ive read so much information (including the books ada shared) and now my brain feels fried and cant process shit i have no idea of where to go from here

firstly. take a break.

honestly, i've been thinking about honesty lol. i've realised that a lot of what i've been doing is to see a manifestation or feel love. but i never wanted to admit it. i might not ever have any """evidence""" for why i am pure awareness - my ego wants to understand. but i've moved on from trying to make it understand or convincing it. its perfectly fine as it is. it can walk, it can intelectualise (something that i actually want to stop doing with nd!), it can talk. thats okay with me. i don't want to demand or force anything more of it. i know what happens when i force my mind to do something, its a complete mess. i know that for the manifestations i want, that it requires me not to be a body-mind. it require something more. something timeless, boundless, etc. i cannot demand that from my body or mind. so i've decided to move past them, work with them when needed and soothe them when needed.

doing the inner work, depending on your ego, might be a thing you need to do (in fact i'd say that everyone needs to do it). its hard to just force yourself to disbelieve and detach. especially when forcing is not what you're supposed to do.

if you're in my inbox then you've read my posts, right?

so you see that i've recommended self inquiry before yes? and that i've put up books? you sound like you haven't read my posts? i've been reblogging so much and talked several times about no forcing!!

give yourself a chance. calm down. you're putting so much pressure on the body-mind to see your Self, BUT IT CAN'T, you are not that which you can observe!! you can't observe Self, THATS WHY THE MIND WILL NEVER GET IT! stop trying to force yourself to see your divinity, just appriciate the divinity you see now (you're literally ALIVE, breathing!! look at the world, you as Self created for YOU. Self fell in love with the character so much it forgot it was not it!!)

you're looking for some woo-woo magical experience that forever changes you - these ideas about enlightenment are not it. whatever ideas about enlightenment the mind had, throw it in the bin.

before enlightenment - chop wood, carry water. after enlightenment - chop wood, carry water!! you'll be going through the world the same, except in how you see the world.

enlightenment is a destruction. its a destruction in how you see the world and yourself. that's it. in the end, you'll feel peace (as others have said so) but you're not there, are you? you're trying to get rid of ego through ego. stop.

you'll never know Self, until you see it yourself. this is through experiments and practise.

stop reading if its frying you're brain. you're entire ask can be solved by "ok i'm gonna take a break this is too much". please the answer to your questions is not some magical shit! this is why i've said before KEEP IT SIMPLE.

this goes to all anons now (not just you anon!) LEARN HOW TO EMOTIONALLY REGULATE YOURSELF. i might just make a big post on this or something.

reading

starting the journey

i've shared this too many times now

another regular article i share

disbelieve

how to let go of vanessa

i'm sorry more ada posts

another one

read this one

LEAVE VANESSA ALONE

[taintedcigs]

little life update !!! (tw: vent, loss, grief idk??)

SOOO ive basically just been hanging out and doing nothing this past week on here bc i don't rlly feel motivated to write! and some days coming on here feels really nice, other days it just makes me feel like shit so i log off. and today i found out i lost a family member that i thought was in recovery. it sucks. and i guess thats just life but as much as i try to ignore it n try not to get too in touch w my emotions it does affect my life n just me in general!!!

i might write as an outlet of my emotions, im not good w grief. or i might just shut off bc i feel overwhelmed. idkkkk. but rn it looks like ill just be taking a little break from writing. not on here prob, but just writing??? or maybe i won't, depends on whether i get a good angst request or an idea?? my mind is an enigma. truly.

and idk why im sharing this tbh no one cares but i guess it makes me feel better to tell yall how im feeling so my brain doesn't fully feel like shit (or useless) for not writing or not posting something ! yeah!!! i hope everyone is having a great saturday luv yall.

[amourtoken]

I have the most gods awful baby fever rn pls can I have baby daddy Noah thoughts pls

hey my dear you absolutely can bc I FREQUENTLY think abt this and I'm in the same boat I wanna have his babies so bad :((

(This is also sfw but I can make it gross if u want next time)

Firstly he's so fucking full of himself from the point you announce your pregnancy onward cause he's like "YEAH I FUCKING DID THAT!!! THATS MY KID!!! AND THEIR FINE ASS MOTHER!!!" yk? He takes the whole dad role very seriously but something abt the baby daddy role is seperate in his brain and he's just fired tf up over it.

He doesn't let you do SHIT around the house and you've complained so much abt wanting to help but he would rather drop dead than change his stance. You're growing a human being with your body, that's what you need to focus on. He's constantly making sure you have everything you need and is checking in on you frequently. If you get morning sickness he's always at your side and making sure you at least try and stay hydrated and get some rest after being sick. He feels so bad about it sometimes cause he feels like it's his fault you're going through all of this but you remind him you agreed to it and you want this kid as much as he does so you're ready to do whatever it takes.

On top of basically babying you at home he's become damn near predatory about how he protects you out of the house. He's always got an arm around you and gets insanely antsy if you're around people he doesn't know. He's okay with the BO guys around you of course cause he knows they'd care for you just as much as he does but anyone else? They can keep their distance. That's the love of his life and his kid right there, he can't risk anything happening to either of you.

Whenever he gets free time he's laying with his head on your belly and you swear you've never seen him so relaxed. I wouldn't say he's the most talkative but he's definitely always pressing his hands against your belly to try and feel your baby moving around. It's unreal to him, he still doesn't feel like it's real truly.

When you actually go into labor the mf freaks out harder than you do cause fuck!!! This is actually really happening and it sucks you're in pain but he's also excited? And terrified? You two decided to not find out if it was a boy or girl till it got here cause you wanted it to be a surprise and Noah secretly wanted a boy but either way he's gonna cry like fucking crazy when it's finally here cause holy shit this is real!!! Again!!! He actually has a baby!! With his baby!!! He's so proud of you for handling the experience so well and also so grateful you gave him a new love of his life :(((

He's the best dad ever. He takes your baby to shows (with hearing protection on ofc) cause he can't stand being away for that long and now he has 2 people to perform for that are his whole world. The whole BO team loves tf out of your kid too cause it's almost like it's their kid too lmao the amount of time they spend with them makes it seem that way.

[ququoquaw]

i may expand on this later but i have things im supposed to be doing rn

edit: i expanded upon it

this will be very messy but i will try my best to make this readable

no clue how old quanxi is so i just wrote down old

kobeni is bisexual because she gives of pathetic bi energy

horny level is just based on the vibes i get from them

awkwardness level - i mean kobeni is kobeni so thats a no brainer. quanxi is like a dinosaur so shed probably have a few awkward moments here and there

jealousy level - with kobenxi being kobeni's first relationship and mixing that with her terrible anxiety, yeah, she's definitely gonna get jealous, she tries her best but she cant help herself. i think that quanxi's jealousy might come from her being slightly overprotective of kobeni and not wanting people to hurt her

quanxi is naturally big spoon but i don't think she's against being held every once in a while. kobeni needs to be held every night or she will cry

less so kobeni lending clothes and more so quanxi taking kobeni's stuff without permission and kobeni not saying anything

quanxi isn't against pet names but i don't think she'd really want to use them. kobeni wants to use them but feels too embarrassed

i feel like both of them are bad with words and physical intimacy so. i do think that quanxi is definitely better than kobeni when it comes to expressing her feelings. she could still work on showing love, but she's way better than kobeni when it comes to that stuff

quanxi would know that kobeni's crushing on her and would say nothing cause she wants to see if kobeni will have to guts to confess. i think that kobeni would confess first simply because she would get too nervous while talking to quanxi and start rambling and at one point she admits to crushing on quanxi

they both hate bugs, but i think that kobeni is scared of them while quanxi is just annoyed/angry with them

i mean kobeni canonically has a car and quanxi is a senior citizen so i doubt she can really be trusted on the road

kobeni seems like the kinda chick that would accidentally set a pb&j sandwich on fire (currently debating in my brain whether or not she can bake, i think it would be cute if she was a decent baker but an awful cook). quanxi had to take care of her 4 fiend girlfriends, she definitely knows how to cook, at least a little bit + shes been living forever so she's had plenty of time to learn

kobeni gets too nervous when it comes to pda. quanxi absolutely loves it though, she feels so happy whenever she kisses kobeni on the cheek in public and kobeni gets all blushy, she feels even happier when kobeni decides to kiss her on the cheek

kobeni doesn't like people talking to quanxi so she definitely gets a bit aggressive (she's still very anxious around people, but she's confident knowing that she could easily beat someone in a fight if they hit on quanxi). quanxi knows that kobeni has really bad anxiety and worries for her, she knows that kobeni can handle herself, but she still gets a bit scared for her

i mean quanxi was canonically in a relationship and is like a million years old so yk. i wouldnt be surprised if people asked kobeni out but she was too scared to ever start something

[rzyraffek]

Odd request, but could you mess around with slashers x gn/male partner who gets seasonal depression or it gets worse when the weather gets crummy? It's been raining for a while where I am and could go for a little comfort, haha.

Possibly Brahms or Billy Lenz? Or anyone else you really want to write.

Can do🌼 If anything here is not accurate please feel free to let me know i really dont want to offend anyone🌺

They/them partner with masculine features okay? Because it might get confusing to read when everyone has he/him pronouns i really hope that you dont mind i just know it wil get confusing

(Sfw) (Request open)

Billy Lenz👽

What you mean seasoned depresion? Doenst sound tasty? He does not belive in long words.🙄

At first he will think that his partner will just be sad for whole winter(or other season but Winter/Autumn is pretty common) which is upsetting because he loves winter. But when he finally understands what being depressed means, he will do his best to be useful

Even if they dont have Energy to leave bed/ do anything in hause, he will stay with them, at first he might talk but if they arent in mood for that he will just keep them company. Its his way of saing 'hey im here for you its gonna to be okay🌼'

He cant cook but if he sees that they were avoiding food latley or just not leaving their room for a while, he will bring them choco pudding

If his partner is cis-man and they grow a bread(and it gives them disphora) he will help them shave it. Like yeah Billy is silly chaotic goblin man but u seen him? Either he has testosterone level -5 or he knows how to shave

Also if they feel bab when weather is gloomy he will just cover the Windows? No Windows=no weather affecing them, easy😎😎😎 (thats billy saying that not me)

Overall 9/10 wont force them to talk to him and will give food

Brahms Heelshire

He knows what it is, but its still heartbreaking to see them like that

If depresion goes hard like hard to the point they cant leave the bed. You remeber how in every Brahms headcanons i mension that you have to help this guy take a Bath? Yep its reverse now. Now He takes care of them

I know that Brahms is a lil bebi boi lil shmol bebi men, but he can get mature if he wants to, he will bring them tea, headpats and warm words. He will probably avoid talking at first, but its because he feels like walking on minefild, NOT because of them being depresed, but because he knows that he sometimes gets angy at random stuff and he really desnt want to yell at them

Hes more happy to give them hugs and lay in bed with them (of couse if they want to)

He will try light up the mood with good dinner or a nice walk around the mansion.

Will spend more time with you, but if you need space he will understand

Overall 8/10 tries his best to light up the mood by being romantic gentleman. Will bring you tea -2 points for being british

Yautja (hes here only because i have funny ideas)

Wym mental health?? Season makes ur brain go not good?? I- my beloved we are on spaceship rn wym

The idea of depresion itself is pretty new for him, so they need to teach him

He will go 😨wym you sick in mind and theres no medicine? 😓aww man 😍 i guess I will stay by urside and help you with anythin u want😈

This guy will pick you up and carry you everywhere u need to be. U need to take a shower? Boom. You are hungry? Watch him speerun cook some pasta with salt and kechup (he has No clue how to food)

Will cuddle

Again if any of those make their partner uncomfortable he wpnt do it, those are just sugestions. Also I know that depresed people arent just little sad bolls without Energy to get out of bed. But he doesnt know that! He didnt know depresion exsisted till 3minutes ago!

6/10 acts like his lover is shmol sad Ball, and will baby them around

[psychewritesbs]

Been reading your opinions on the boy of all time megumi and can I just say firstly, thank you for being so good w words BC man you get his character so well and you're so good at getting into all the little details abt him that I can never properly describe to ppl, Like, the whole breaks the trope while following the trope thing?? YOU GOT THAT ALL SO CORRECT THATS EXACTLY IT IT'S ONE OF THE REASONS I LOVE HIS CHARACTER SM BC EVEN JUST RIGHT OFF THE BAT HE BREAKS THE USUAL STOIC BROODING CHARACTER TROPE(THE trope) BY ACTUALLY CONSTANTLY SHOWING although subtly THAT HE DOESNT HATE EVERYONE?? im getting way off track already i actually popped in here to just ask abt how you think the whole sukuna possessing megumi thing will all turn out?? I honestly feel like slapping myself for not seeing it coming tbh like they talked about the head of the six eyes and ten shadows battling it out to the death before and sukuna kept on hyping up megumi like they were so obviously setting that up there and I just. Denied. But I'm just asking BC personally I think that it would really show the final steps of growth for megumi's character if he is actually able to surprise sukuna, even for a little, and come back from the depths of where ever tf he is rn bc yk his whole issue w/ self worth and what he believes he's capable of and I just wanted to know what you think the best outcome for his character would be? Sorry this is such a mess I just have so many thoughts zooming around my brain and I'm trying to...make them make sense...

ITS THE MEGUMI LOVE!!!! Yessssss. Thank you for sending me Megumi love! I love getting Megumi love 🫶🏼.

Man, Megumi is just such a good character. Truly one of Gege's best. Everything he's done with him from how his character is based on the trope while also subverting the trope, to his backstory and his growth arc and how it's been executed... It's poetic justice.

I love Megumi so much, and any time I see someone hate on Megumi for really shallow or toxic reasons I just lose all faith in humanity. It's one thing to not care for him as a character and quite another to dislike him for being a "disappointing deuteragonist" because he's "weak", "hasn't had character development", and "did not master 10 Shadows"..................................................

Bruh...

ANYWAYS 😂 you see... this is the thing... I am trying really hard not to speculate about what might happen regarding Sukuna WHICH IS EXACTLY WHY I'M GOING TO SPECULATE BECAUSE I LOVE SUKUNA BUT FUCK SUKUNA!

ehem. More of me not being normal about Megumi under the cut.

Ok in all seriousness... with chapter 230 and how Sukuna forced Megumi to take the brunt hit of Unlimited Void, something shifted in me.

For some time I've been reluctant to make any predictions about Megumi coming out alive because I don't want to have preconceived expectations coloring my weekly reading experience, but mostly because, like Megumi, I have a tendency to bunt instead of swinging for the fence so as to not experience disappointment. Read this to mean I don't want to get my hopes up about Megumi surviving.

That is not to mention that I took Sukuna possessing Megumi's body personal. idk, something about seeing Megumi lose his agency felt both so wrong and yet so right on a metaphorical level. Wrong because DAMN YOU SUKUNA GO BACK TO YOUR BODY! and right because... as you said, Megumi had it coming both from a narrative and psychological perspective.

From then on, we just saw him sink deeper and deeper into learned helplessness and despair, culminating on this beautiful image of him in the fetal position.

Truly a reversal of ego back into the metaphorical mother (the unconscious) as though he was in the birth canal waiting for rebirth. And come to think of it, in the Japanese fandom, one of the more popular theories revolved around "birth" or something like that.

So with ch. 230, my hope for Megumi is renewed somehow. A lot of people think he's done for, especially after UV. But I'm on camp #this is going to backfire badly on both Gojo and Sukuna... or at least I hope it does.

So....

I'm just asking BC personally I think that it would really show the final steps of growth for megumi's character if he is actually able to surprise sukuna, even for a little

EXACTLY! And see, this is the thing, I don't want to see Megumi be saved by anyone other than himself. If Megumi is saved by others, then he didn't learn his lesson.

Basically, Megumi has taken Tsumiki's place as the Sleeping Beauty that is in need of rescuing. He's become a passive agent in his own life, which is exactly what gave Sukuna an opening.

If Gojo or Yuji, or anyone for that matter, comes in and saves Megumi without Megumi putting up a fight, then this whole growth process is metaphorically and literally aborted.

Like you, I personally think that this period could be a metaphorical gestational period for Megumi and I wonder if he's going to reach a tipping point where the anger he feels is stronger than the learned helplessness or something like that.

I just wanted to know what you think the best outcome for his character would be?

ALL THAT TO SAY THAT YES. Sukuna might be my other fave, but I am looking forward to either Megumi giving him a hard time or straight up beating the crap out of him.

Megumi has earned that privilege.

Right now, I am wondering how UV has affected Megumi's brain and what that will mean for his behavior. My hc is that his negative self-image is partly due to "reason". In other words, reason = his sense of self as the story he tells himself about himself.

But Megumi levels up because of imagination. Now that he's been hit by UV (I understand it's been 5 times?), how has being flooded with infinity affected the left (reason or logic, analytical) hemisphere of his brain?

Another idea I've been keeping quiet about is that part of the rebirth process involves moving through hell and up into heaven (a la Dante's Divine Comedy as a metaphor for a process of initiation or enlightenment). Megumi right now is sinking in hell as he comes face to face with inner evil.

So can we expect him to come back up? Will Beatrice make a cameo? I'm looking forward to whatever the cursed cat is cooking.

I just have so many thoughts zooming around my brain and I'm trying to...make them make sense...

ahaha, same tho.

Hey thanks again for the Megumi love, the kind comments, and for stopping by! Here's to hoping Gege does bring our boy back 🙌.

[thesimulacrasimp]

So yeah, here we go again! I just watched 3rd n 4th eps of hazbin hotel so, again, my thoghts abt it. Idk if i really need to put spoilers warning anymore, but ig ill do it just in case. As with previous post there will be some screenshots.

HAZBIN HOTEL EP 3-4 SPOILERS WARNING!

So tbh i dont have much to say about 3rd ep. Overall it was a really cute ep where everyone kinda got along. Also we met alot of new overlords (that one giant wolf girl was cool as hell) n got a few bop songs. I really like all new voices we got here. Also Velvette was killin in this ep, like slay queen!! Also i didnt know this girl (idk her name srry) was Carmillas (idk if spelled the name correctly--) daughter, that really suprised me.

Ok 4th ep... I have alot to say about it. First of all when that Angels moive started i was like: WTH S GOIN ON WHAT????? Then i thoght that its Angels dream (or nightmare-) n that wolf guy was representation of Valentino. N then when its all started i was like: Oh. I get it.

Speaking about Val, when all that fire started n he opened his wings, that was FUCKING BEAUTIFUL N I REALLY DIDNT EXPECT HIM TO HAVE ACTUAL WINGS, I WAS LIKE: :O I FOR REAL ALWAYS THOUGHT THAT WAS JUST A FUR COAT--- ok n thats literally the only good i can say about Val by now.

That one awful scene with Val n Angel was literally so scary... Ive never been in SA, ive never had such "experience" (and thank GOD for that), but i know that feeling of fear when you just in trap and you cant do anything, i know how that feels to be abused, when you just hiding in corner feeling so fucking scared that you gonna get beated up n yelled again, you KNOW that will happen and you just wait for it in terrify, you literally feel yourself like a little child who cant do anything, you want to share your problems to someone, just wanna cry to someone, but you cant and you need to pretend that everything is okay. I was so scared for Angel in that scene and i really felt it. And the way Angel tried to make Charlie leave before that all happened.. Yes, he definetly knew whats gonna happen n thats so scary...

Anyway OMG VOX HIIII!!!!!! :DDDD

BTW THE FACT THAT HES HOLDING VALS HAND LIKE HE WAS ABOUT TO KISS IT----- THIS SHIP IS TAKING OVER MY BRAIN PLS SEND HELP

Yeah, yknow what really strange thing about all that? Is the fact that Val s obviously a horrible person consindering all the things he done to Angel, but he is still an ENJOYABLE CHARACTER. Like- ofc that awful abusive scene was not enjoyable at all, but for some reason i just cant hate him!! I TRY BUT I JUST CANT N THATS SO WEIRD. probably its because i know its not a real person, its just a character but still-

Also (someone pls count how many times i used this word-) i really didnt expect to see an ACTUAL SEX SCENES IN THE SONG. Ig i shouldve expect it n i kinda did, but i still didnt-

Also this little scene made me fucking cry, for real. But not the fact that Angel crying made me cry, but his line: "If i end up broken, I wont be his favourite toy anymore. And maybe he'll let me go.."

I dont know why this exact line made me cry, but it did and i think this is awesome, because they really made me care for Angel, even tho, again, ive never experienced such feelings so i cant relate to that, but i still feel so bad for him.

Ok can we talk about that Husk was AN OVERLORD??? I WAS LIKE: WHAAAAATT????

And OF COURSE that one Husk n Angels song. You already know how i feel about it so im not even gonna talk bout it! SIKE‼️I WILL!!!!! THIS SONG IS SO FRICKIN CUTE, THE FACT THAT HUSK STARTED TO JOKINGLY (or maybe not jokingly-) SAYING THAT ANGEL IS A LOSER TO BRIGHT HIM UP IS ACTUALLY SO SMART! THEYRE BOTH SO CUTE TOGETHER SINGING AND HOLDING HANDS FOR A LITTLE TOO MUCH!!! AND THIS SONG IS MUSICALLY ALSO SO AMAZING, ITS LITERALLY MY STYLE OF SONGS, MAYBE MY NEW FAV SONG I CANT REALLY TELL RN! And the meaning of this song is really good too. Whatever is happening to you, unless youre not alone, everything is better!

Andddd everything is ended quite good and wholesome! They came to the hotel, Charlie apoligized and everything is good!!

soooo yeah! Thats it i guess! Im pretty sure im gonna edit it if i remember something else i wanted to say, but thats it by now!

My review/thoughts on eps 1-2

My review/thoughts on eps 5-6

My review/thoughts on eps 7-8