#the Choi family dynamics are fascinating to me

[bluemoonpunch]

Relationship Reading for Choi San and Jung Wooyoung - Tarot Reading

[This reading covers the relationship dynamic between Choi San and Jung Wooyoung on a subconscious and energetic level. This particular reading can cover romantic, platonic, and familial relationships and is designed to put a connection between two people into perspective, showcasing what is gained from the relationship and what the highest potential of the connection is. I used The Linestrider’s Journey Tarot for this reading. This spread is an original design by me. This reading lasted less than 1 hour.]

Reading Performed: July 4, 2024

Posted: July 13, 2024

Back in November/December of 2023, I had random hyperfixation on ATEEZ for a solid month or so — I heard Bouncy and it was all downhill from there. My dumb ass, as always, started reading in on their energy and there were some interesting things that came through the first time I watched the MV for Bouncy, and came to find out, I did readings on a couple of the members back in 2018 and some of that same energy was coming through. It was really interesting because I recognized it, saw it so clearly, and then found out I wrote about the exact same imagery years ago. That led to me SPIRALING and basically breaking down the entire group's current state, purpose, past lives, bla bla bla, the whole thing. Like, I was going to write a 50-page report on all of it because it was genuinely fascinating what was coming through and how it was seemingly showing up in their personal development and work now.

Depression and physical health issues hit, so I never did write anything, but I saw some really, really, really interesting stuff for San and Wooyoung that suggests an isolated lifetime centered on healing and protection that stems from issues that arose in a past life where Wooyoung would have been on his own due to necessary soul development that was needed in order to occupy the same space as San on a higher level. Quite literally, it looked like they were just casually fucking around on Earth for centuries, popped out, and realized they couldn’t go where they wanted to go together without Wooyoung’s soul experiencing more development, so they threw him back in on his own in a hyper-compressed incarnation cycle and things just didn't go well.

That lifetime, which was actually an incarnation cycle of three lifetimes back to back, ended up being quite negative and left “scars” on the souls of everyone involved. I really could write a whole other thing about all of this, I have a ridiculous amount of notes on it because out of everyone, they have the most interestingly deep soul connection I have ever seen out of all the readings I have ever done. Like, they are literally here to do nothing else but heal Wooyoung’s soul and balance energy — balancing energy and healing seems to be the group’s collective “purpose,” although they seem to have given themselves this purpose. They are not, as I’ve seen it, “on the roster,” but are to be influential, especially as individuals.

For San and Wooyoung, when I first watched the video I was like, oh they definitely have some vibes together, don’t they? And then I found out that San is a Cancer and Wooyoung is a Sagittarius. I have, FOR YEARSSSS, wanted to analyze a pair made up of a Cancer and Sagittarius because I’ve always found their reflective energies together to be so interesting. You have Cancer, Cardinal Water, Firery Water, boiling water, a spewing geyser, and Sagittarius, Mutable Fire, Watery Fire, flowing fire, an erupting volcano. They’re quite literally the SAME energies, visually they line up, they just erupt from different spaces. Fire and Water are the most difficult elements to balance, but Cancer and Sagittarius have an inherent balance within them between Water and Fire, although it can make them a bit temperamental and sensitive.

To me, it always felt like a Cancer and Sagittarius would simply have to hate each other until there was just one split second where they both happened to “erupt” at the same time, express something from within at the same time, and suddenly they’re like, “oh, you’re me, i’m you” and then it’s just best friends forever. And that’s basically what I saw between them when looking at their energetic connections now within this lifetime.

For the sake of not getting too wild off the bat, I will just focus on what came through in this reading alone, but if anyone is interested, I will GLADLY unload all of what I have for ATEEZ down the line.

Overall Energy

As expected, Healing and Regeneration are at the head of the overall energy between them. Healing and protection are extremely strong links for them that are rooted in the soul. So deeply rooted that this may feel more instinctual for them at this point than emotional or mental. Healing represents the energy, while Regeneration marks where and how that energy is being used. It gives me the sense of the souls re-expanding after experiencing a few downfalls, especially on Wooyoung’s side where, as I mentioned, he has acquired some pretty deep soul scars from past lifetimes.

Discovery (Mercury in Sagittarius) and the Lunar Eclipse both give this incredible sense of conscious level expansion to match with the expansion of their souls. They could explore spiritual things together, or discuss personal philosophy with each other. This is very focused between the two of them and gives me the sense of them being able to holds a “birs’s eye view” when they ponder things together, as if their vision becomes clearer through the other, allowing them to understand themselves, each other, and the world much easier when they seek it out together.

The Queen of Cups at the end there grounds a lot of this energy into a more physical and conscious place, but still highlights the strong soul connection and suggests tightly woven emotional bonds as well. One of the keywords with this card is “devotion” which suits them well on all levels of connection.

Before we get to the main reading, I just want to point out how INSANE it is that the mirrored state of their souls showed up in this reading so clearly. I really do want to do a deepdive post on them at some point because everything that I’ve seen for them has honestly blown my mind, and their cards here just add to that.

San’s Projection: Ten of Wands (rev.) Wooyoung’s Projection: Ten of Swords (rev.)

This set marks the energy that San and Wooyoung individually project into their relationship with each other. This is purely an energetic projection and may not reflect emotional or mental connections. Here, San is projecting the reversed Ten of Wands while Wooyoung is projecting the reversed Ten of Swords. These are the “bad 10s” in tarot, both holding quite a lot of pain, frustration and even death in their upright positions. There may be a display here of conflict between the soul and the conscious level aspects as both of these cards essentially are in denial of themselves, but seemingly for the sake of each other.

Tens mark the end, and when reversed, that end is being denied or something isn’t being brought to completion. On San’s end, the focus is on Wands, Fire, energy, and matters of the body, while Wooyoung’s focuses on Swords, Air, thoughts and communication, and matters of the mind. It displays a set dynamic where San is the body and Wooyoung is the mind, which is somewhat similar to what I saw of their souls in a state before they started incarnating on Earth. On a conscious and physical level, this settles more as physical and mental burdens they both share partially being withheld from the other.

Essentially, it’s like the reversed state of these cards came by two hands. For example, if San is feeling physically unwell he may hide it from Wooyoung to not worry him, but Wooyoung may also be someone he wants to be around when he’s not feeling well. Therefore there could be a kind of secret nurturing where sometimes they have to ask each other or very directly express their negative states to each other, and other times they can care for each other without much talking at all. So, in some aspects, they reverse their own cards, and in others, they reverse each other. Either way, they will never get to a breaking point, they will never hit a physical or mental “rock bottom” so long as they have the other to balance them.

To explain the cards more, the Ten of Wands, when upright, traditionally features someone carrying a lot of sticks (Wands/Fire/Energy) towards a destination that is quite far away in the background of the image. In the Rider-Waite deck, the man in the image is shown to really be struggling, hunched over with his face buried in the sticks as he tries to keep hold of them. In the image in this deck, it’s shown as a young girl who has collapsed on the ground with a bag of sticks on her back as she stares at her destination in the background.

It’s physical overwhelm or overexertion that puts a lot of strain on the body. This card can have a positive side to it as it can suggest that whatever overwhelming or strenuous situation you are in right now may come to an end soon, but when it is reversed, it’s more so allowing yourself to drop those sticks and take a breather. This can be positive as you can catch your breath and regain some energy, but in other situations, reversals here could line up with someone giving up just before they’re about to hit their finish line.

For San, I really feel this in a literal way where there is overexertion on the body, or a tendency to overdo physical activity, especially in a stressed state, and either for Wooyoung’s sake, or with the help of Wooyoung, he pulls that energy down, grounds himself, and sort of tempers his own Fire. It’s making me think of someone who would work out quite hard for hours, and then finish up with a grounding meditation. I will say that San’s soul, where it stems from, is a very high place, his energy is very high frequency and with that, it can be quite hard to hold that energy in the body. A lot of movement or bodily focus is necessary for him to stay grounded, so this may be connected to that as well.

The Ten of Swords, when upright, traditionally shows a man lying dead on a shoreline with ten swords in his back. In the background, we can see the sky either clearing or gathering in a storm, and the sun either rising or setting in the background. As Swords relate to Air energy, thoughts and communication, logic, and harsh reality, the Ten of Swords marks an undeniable end, one you can’t alleviate or run from. This can have a lot to do with anxiety and depression, as well as negative self-image if you can imagine the swords as your own thoughts and the body as yourself.

As I’ve seen in past explorations with them, both in past lives (and out-of-body lives) and the current lifetime, Wooyoung seems to have quite a bit of mental weight to him, but it’s not necessarily observational, as in it’s not so much that he’s thinking a lot, it’s like he takes in a lot of what is around him, what he hears, what he sees, and he holds onto it. The image of the Ten of Swords here in this deck is more so accurate to what I feel for Wooyoung.

In the image, a deer (I think) is shown to have been shot by many arrows and is twisted in pain. Those arrows could be equated to the words and actions of other people that Wooyoung carries with him. This can reflect his soul state with the soul scarring, as well as his current state where there does seem to be some sensitivity and maybe some personal insecurity to him.

They hide from each other a little bit, they hide this stress from each other, but at the same time it’s kind of impossible to do such a thing when they are so closely linked that you could argue they may be able to read each other's minds. They hide these states from each other, but at the same time, they each help the other to maintain and balance these quite heavy energies and keep them from ever reaching a true breaking point.

How San Sees Wooyoung: Nine of Cups + Ace of Cups How Wooyoung Sees San: Ace of Pentacles + Nine of Pentacles

This was the most insane part of the reading for me. The mirrored Tens already had me like O.O, and then this shit came out and I was like, what the fuck am I even supposed to do with this??

This set covers how, based on the current state and their projections, they see each other within their relationship. San sees Wooyoung as the Nine of Cups and the Ace of Cups, while Wooyoung sees San as the Nine of Pentacles and Ace of Pentacles. I find it interesting that while they are “hiding” their Tens from each other, they actively acknowledge and seem to praise each other at their peaks with these Nines. What’s even more fun is that in these suits, Cups and Pentacles, the Tens are some of the most positive cards in the deck, and with these Aces here, it almost feels like they look at each other as if they have the ingredients to make the Ten of Pentacles and the Ten of Cups — Ace (1) + Nine.

Here, they also seem to really acknowledge each other as a counterpart, someone they balance with, or someone who has what they are missing. Wooyoung, who may experience a bit more emotional and mental turmoil, looks to San as this space of stability and support, a strong foundation based in Earth energy with the Pentacles. There’s an admiration through the Nine of Pentacles for how independent he is and how well he is able to accomplish what he sets out to do. San, who seems to be a bit more physically oriented for the sake of staying grounded, sees Wooyoung as this flowing energy, seeing him as having more Water to him. A strong, open sensitivity that he finds fulfilling and relaxing. There’s an appreciation here for creativity and fluidity as well.

My favorite thing about this, is that as they acknowledge each other as counterparts through these energies, they are essentially blending Earth and Water energy. Similar to Water and Fire, Water and Earth can be a bit tricky to mix as you can destabilize Earth with Water, or dry out and absorb Water with Earth. In its perfect balance, however, as it is displayed here with these mirrored energies, Water and Earth come together to create clay. Something, energy, that can be shaped and molded at will into anything. Combining that with an element of balance between Divine Masculine energy on San’s side and Divine Feminine energy on Wooyoung’s side, you basically have two people who, when working together, are a magic wand away from being The Magician, a master manifestor.

In other words, anything they create together or work on together where they can focus on each other could be considered magic in the sense that they would have quite a lot of ease in bringing their visions to life while working together.

Current State of The Relationship: The Lovers Highest Potential: Ten of Pentacles

Here, The Lovers came out to represent the current state of their relationship, while the Ten of Pentacles popped out to showcase the highest potential of their relationship going forward. I put them together because what it looks like to me is that the Lovers represent the soul connection while the Ten of Pentacles represent that soul connection being completely integrated into the physical and conscious levels. They’re already there pretty much, perhaps that’s the significance of the Nines and Aces combos, but this suggests that they’re supposed to get to that higher state and integrate more of those higher aspects.

In one of the many readings I did for them, I did see, especially for San as his soul is quite BIG energetically speaking, that there were multiple stages of soul integration that he would experience in this lifetime that would be marked by alterations of the body — found out a bit later that he did bulk up quite a bit over the last few years, so I assume, especially when it comes to the need to ground into the physical through the actual body, that this is reflective of that. Wooyoung doesn’t have as much to integrate, but his soul is still occupying a much higher state than he is right now on a conscious level. The integration for Wooyoung may be noticeable in drastic changes regarding self-perception, self-esteem, and how he operates or expresses himself artistically.

As this entire lifetime is very self-focused (focused on each other) for the two of them, specifically in the realm of healing Wooyoung and progressing his soul a bit more so that he can join San out of body on a more well-matched level, it makes sense that potentially the Ten of Pentacles here marks, in its entirety, the completion of this lifetime with all that they set out to do being accomplished. The current state of The Lovers implies personal alignment, but in this context, reflects their deep soul unity and recognition of each other as soul counterparts (the term "soulmate" doesn’t quite capture how significant this connection actually is).

The Lovers, on a soul level, based on the traditional Rider-Waite image, showcases personal inner alignment of the layers of consciousness — conscious, subconscious, unconscious — through the images of Adam, Eve, and the Angel Raphael. Adam represents the conscious mind that looks to Eve, the receptive, intuitive subconscious, who looks to the Higher Self, the higher unconscious mind represented by the Angel.

In addition to that, Adam and Eve stand in as representatives of the Divine Feminine and Divine Masculine as Eve, the force of Life, stands in front of a flourishing tree and Adam, the force of destruction or deconstruction, stands in front of a burning tree. When they are in balance, Life and Death dance happily, but if Adam looks away from Eve, if the Divine Masculine loses sight of the Divine Feminine, it loses connection to its own soul, stagnates, and becomes destructive toward the surrounding environment. If Eve disconnects from either side, she can become destructive toward herself.

The Lovers card in this deck here shows San and Wooyoung as these counterparts, Divine Masculine and Divine Feminine, being in perfect sync with each other, implying that within themselves they hold that personal alignment, and are able to meet each other on all levels. This is what makes soul integration possible for them and is what is fueling the soul healing that Wooyoung is experiencing in this lifetime.

*More readings at bluemoonpunch.com!

[halotolerant]

Dear Yuletide Writer 2022

Dear Yuletide Writer

Thank you for writing for me! I am delighted you share my enjoyment of one of these tiny fandoms, congratulations on your taste :D 

ETA: Mods have asked for us to explicitly state this year if we would like treats: I LIKE TREATS :D

I have rambled about each one to give you a starting point, please write what you feel moved to write. I am very into stories about relationships - platonic, romantic, sexual and all the overlaps. I definitely enjoy an E rated fic but I’m always there for the characters first and foremost. 

&TEAM

Any

Having watched ‘I-LAND’ about a year late, I was fascinated by the contestants and the narratives woven around them. I definitely left with a vested interest in what was next. And then, excitement, K, Taki, Nicholas and EJ in this mysterious project that turned into &Audition and then &Team! I loved &Audition and Fuma crept up on me (as, as far as I can tell, he did on the producers, given his total lack of presence in ‘Final Countdown’) to become my favourite, so I was delighted when he made the cut. 

I would quite like something that stays more or less in ‘canon’ as in the formation of the band and their idol trainee careers, but clearly there’s a practically canonical werewolf situation going on here and I think that’s fascinating too. Also cool with omegaverse especially as it relates to ~dynamics.  

I’ve requested ‘Any’ and I would like fic for any of these guys, ideally about how they relate to each other rather than just about one of them, and I’m also up for all the ship combos, to whatever degree of heat you’d like to bring. Welcome to bring in the other members too but I’d rather not have ship fic with Jo, Harua, Taki, Maki or Yuma for any of these guys. You can bring in ENHYPEN members if you like especially in regard to I-LAND.

DNWs: Death, suicide/sucidal ideation, self-harm, non-con 

Some thoughts/squee/vague prompts if it helps:

DEBUT FEELS, PACK FEELS, FOUND FAMILY FEELS :D

how much older K and Fuma are than most debuters

K and Fuma in general processing being older/leadership and how they interact

Extrovert Nicholas and Introvert EJ

the way Nicholas looks after everyone

the journey from I-LAND to &Audition & second chances

Nicholas and Fuma’s amazing choreography

K and Fuma’s choreography (and Fuma MADE HIMSELF INTO A CHAIR for K in the final???)

Fuma helping EJ with the ‘Blue Hour’ group

Settling in as the new band  

IN THE SOOP: Friendcation RPF

Park Hyungsik

Park Seojoon

Wooga squad! This whole series just blows my mind, like, one day Kim Taehyung is like ‘I miss my buds, I know, I’ll ask my management to just commission us a reality TV fixed camera series at 3 days notice and we’ll all go snuggle in matching logo pyjamas’… I loved the vibe of the show - THERE WAS ONLY ONE BED - the cooking, the Park Seojoon-is-mathyung thing, the tender wistful talk about how their lives are going and the different ways they’re finding happiness, the general affection and cosy pleasures. 

I would love something either set in the IN THE SOOP timeframe/setting or in the wider history of these guys. My knowledge of them is, I will admit, limited to a certain amount of Hwarang behind-the-scenes and this show, so I am not going to nitpick or factcheck any details you want to invent about their lives - plus this is RPF, it’s all invented! I don’t know or care if either of them has a real life partner and for ship fic let’s say they don’t. I really dig their dynamic, especially in relation to their characters’ dynamic on Hwarang which was supposed to be rivals and came off way more like pissy yearning :D I would also be totally up for squad OT5 poly, or shipping either of these two with some/all other members of the squad, and I love Choi Minho so if you want to bring him in on the Hwarang connection be my guest. 

DNWs: Death, suicide/sucidal ideation, self-harm, non-con 

Some thoughts/squee/vague prompts if it helps:

Just total domestic vibes in the vacation home. Cooking, washing, snuggling, maybe dreaming about living together or how they can’t

THERE WAS ONLY ONE BED

Something something muscle kink

Hyungsik’s singing voice

Did the crush begin on the Hwarang set? 

All the hours spent chatting over video game comms

SNUGGLING FOR WARMTH

Old Fashion Cupcake 

Nozue Sanae

Togawa Minoru

This show was SO GORGEOUS. I’ve watched a fair few ‘BL’ and I just loved that this was about older characters with full lives, making discoveries about themselves and finding happiness. THE DEEP EROTICISM OF SOMEONE WHO MAKES YOU JOYFUL \o/ It was so sweet and also had moments that were so hot (when Togawa put his fingers in Nozue’s mouth, my god). Clearly they were only allowed 1 kiss on screen and frankly, dear author, I just want more of their happily ever after, anything and everything that entails. 

DNWs: Death, suicide/sucidal ideation, self-harm, non-con 

Some thoughts/squee/vague prompts if it helps:

First times - ALL OF THEM, first for the intimacies but also for the grocery shopping together, the holidays, the moving into the same apartment, the holding hands (somewhere safe) in public 

Queerness and identity discovery in a joyful way 

Backstories - who have they been with before? How does that compare? How do they feel about each other’s pasts? How do they discover it?

More little domestic daily pleasures

Curtain fic, honestly 

[minhoinator]

By My Side, A Hogwarts AU (21/75)

promises kept -  “Nervous?”

Minho stopped fidgeting for a second, his hands folding in his lap as he looked over at Mom. He was about to answer her, but then a voice called out over the intercom: “Stockport, arriving in five minutes. Stockport, arriving in five minutes.” 

“Is that his train?”

master list // AO3 // AFF // first year - muggle-born, sorted, first day, homesick, hallowe’en, deck the halls, possibilities, belonging, exceedingly acceptable, return to king’s cross - second year - diagonally, taking flight, ten points, all that glitters, holly jolly, push and pull, shooting stars, special treat, sleepover, promises made 

@lockandminkey @minhosbowties @sapphicshawol @artfulkey @shinyexo  @posygal  @bumkeyko  @usuallydreamin  @taespoon-of-sugar (if anyone else wants to be tagged in this, just let me know!)

* - * - *

“Nervous?”

Minho stopped fidgeting for a second, his hands folding in his lap as he looked over at Mom. He was about to answer her, but then a voice called out over the intercom: “Stockport, arriving in five minutes. Stockport, arriving in five minutes.”

“Is that his train?” he asked as he bounded off the bench and weaved through the crowd to the screen displaying the train numbers and their arrival times.

The click of Mom’s heels followed him, her arm draping over his shoulders. “0525, that’s his train, right?” Minho nodded, taking a deep breath and letting it out slowly. Kibum would be arriving at Platform 10, should they go there and wait for him to get off the train? “Let’s go back and wait for him on the bench, all right?”

“But…” He turned to watch as she started to walk away. Did Kibum know his way around Muggle train stations? Would he even know where to look for them? While her back was still turned, Minho darted up the steps and ran down the crowded corridor toward Platform 10.

Once he found it, he bounced on the balls of his feet, freezing on his tiptoes when the train pulled up to the platform, the brakes screeching as it came to a stop. Minho grinned when he spotted Kibum peering through the window, returning his wave happily. The other passengers poured out of the doors and on to the platform. It took a while for Kibum to make an appearance in the doorway. He bolted to him once he did, smiling up at him as he stepped down onto the platform.

Minho hugged him as soon as both of his feet were on the ground. “Hey, buddy,” Kibum said, patting his back until Minho let him go. “Where’re your parents?”

“Dad and Minseok are at practice and Mom is waiting on one of the benches.” He gestured to the patched-up satchel hanging at Kibum’s side. “Do we need to go get your luggage?”

“Nope. This is it.”

“Huh.” Kibum laughed as he started following the rest of the passengers off the platform, Minho following him immediately. “Yeah, let’s go find Mom.”

* - * - *

The drive home from the train station was...oddly tense. Kibum tugged on the seatbelt, pulling it away from his neck and slipping it over his head. Minho glanced back at him from his spot in the front seat, offering him a small smile, and looked like he was about to say something. But, a strange jingle started to play, and his attention snapped back over to his mom.

He held his hand out, taking the thin pink device she handed him and flipped it open before he held it up to his ear. “Hey, Dad!” He paused, laughing after a second. “You’re using dad’s phone, stupid, of course I’m gonna think you’re Dad!”

Mrs. Choi smacked Minho’s arm lightly. “Be nice to your brother.”

“You didn’t hear h -- hmm? Okay...okay...yeah...okay, bye.” Minho closed the thin pink thing and slipped it back into his mom’s purse. “Practice is running a little late so you don’t have to have dinner ready until 8.”

She let out a long sigh and Kibum leaned over a little to see the time on the car radio. Damn it, it was only 4:30, but he was already hungry -- he and Grandma usually ate early. As if on cue, his stomach growled and Minho glanced back at him. He glanced between Kibum and his mom, his expression a little weird. Kibum’s brow furrowed when Minho looked back at his mom with a smile.

“What if we got pizza and they got something on the way home?”

“I don’t know.”

“You like pizza, right, Kibum?”

“Uh...” Minho looked back at him and Mrs. Choi met his eyes in the rearview mirror. “I’ve never had it, I don’t think.”

Both of their eyes widened, and Mrs. Choi changed lanes quickly. “Get my phone and text your father.” Minho nodded and grabbed the pink thing from her purse, flipping it open again. “Tell him that they can either have leftover pizza or they can pick something up on the way home.” She met Kibum’s eyes through the mirror again. “I’m sure you’ll love it.”

Kibum smiled at her before she looked back at the road. Soon, they pulled into a parking lot for a place called Croma. They followed Mrs. Choi inside, both peering over her shoulder as she ordered them two pizzas -- a margarita and an Americana, he thought she said -- as well as some garlic bread sticks and salads.

“Grandma grows garlic around the house,” Kibum said as they headed over to the semi-populated waiting area. “Like, all around the house. We use it, of course, for cooking and, like, potions and stuff, but it’s mostly there to keep vampires away.”

Minho’s eyes widened and he started to say something, but they were both quickly shushed by Mrs. Choi. Kibum frowned, glancing around at the curious Muggles in the waiting area. Something dinged inside her purse, and she pulled out the pink thing, ignoring them for a moment.

Minho cleared his throat, leaning toward Kibum to whisper, “When we’re around...other people...we probably shouldn’t talk about...that stuff.”

Kibum glanced past him to his mother, who was still focused on the pink thing. “Even around your family?”

“Uhh...”

“Really?”

“It’s okay sometimes, and Minseok is usually okay with it, but...sorry, I should have mentioned it earlier.”

“It’s okay.” An awkward sort of silence stretched between them, broken when one of the people in the waiting area was called up to get their pizza. “Am I gonna be in trouble?”

Minho laughed. “No, I don’t think so.” He chuckled again before he sobered. “Just be sure not to say anything in front of my dad, because then you might be.”

“Choi!”

They hurried after Mrs. Choi as she made her way back up to the counter. She handed the two pizza boxes to Minho and the foil bag of breadsticks and the salads to Kibum. “Go ahead and sit in the back seat, honey,” she said when they reached the car. Minho slid the pizza into the middle of back seat before he hopped inside. “We’ll be home in ten minutes.”

Kibum thought he had been hungry before, but the smell wafting up from the pizza and the garlic bread was nearly torturous. When his stomach growled loudly again, Minho looked over at him, his eyes alit with silent laughter. He continued to talk to his mom about whatever they were talking about while he slowly unrolled the top of the breadsticks bag. With a finger on his lips, he passed one to Kibum, who ate it quietly and quickly, savoring it as much as he could on the way home.

Prism Lane was quite similar in appearances to Juliette Boulevard, with the small, matching houses and the cobblestone lanes leading to the brightly colored doors. One of the differences, Kibum noticed, were the gardens.

Here, they were pristine, with prim little rose bushes or orchids or carnations lining the homes. Back in Nottingham, however, Kibum knew that at least seven of the other residents were witches and wizards, since some of the kids were also at Hogwarts. The gardens back home were teaming with different plants, to make potions and poultices and salves, or to cook with, since they did not often go to Muggle grocery stores.

They pulled into the driveway and followed her into the house. It was nice and homey, in its own way, but not cozy like Grandma’s house. The walls were painted a cool gray with touches of blue and green accented in the art and the plants. Even though he had only seen the entrance, it seemed oddly clean, compared to Grandma’s house.

“Put the pizza on the counter before you show Kibum to your room, all right?”

“Yes, ma’am,” Minho said, kicking off his shoes and holding the pizza boxes in his arms out to Kibum. “Put those here. I’ll go set them down. Just wait here?” Kibum set the bag of breadsticks and salads on top of the pizza boxes and watched as Minho glided across the hardwood floor to the swinging kitchen door. He reappeared a second later and hurried to put his shoes on top of the cubby by the door. “You can put yours next to mine.”

He set his shoes beside Minho’s and followed him upstairs to his room. “What...”

“Hmm?” Kibum pointed to the bed floating on the floor. “Oh, that’s our air mattress. We had it from when Jinki or Taemin or any of Minseok’s friends would sleep over.”

“Oh.” Tentatively, Kibum sat down on the end.

“I think there’s a hole in it, so we’ll have to blow it up every night.”

“Blow...it up?”

Minho snorted. “Like, with air?” He propped his feet up on the air mattress, jostling Kibum where he sat. Kibum rolled his eyes and started to glare at Minho when they heard a cupboard slam shut downstairs. “Oh, we should hurry,” Minho said, already hopping over the air mattress and reaching for his bedroom door. “We don’t want the pizza to get cold.”

Thankfully, they made it in time. The pizza was...deliciously hot and cheesy and Kibum wondered why the hell he had been deprived of it for so long.

They needed this at Hogwarts.

He was about to ask Minho to suggest it to Sookey when they got back to school, but Mr. Choi and Minseok walked through the door. Mrs. Choi got up to greet them and Kibum glanced at Minho, who set his fork down with a sigh as he looked to the dining room doorway. Kibum sucked the red sauce off his thumb and followed his gaze.

“Hey, Min...” Minseok said as soon as he stepped into the kitchen, grabbing a plate and a couple slices of pizza before he looked up and locked eyes with Kibum. “Hi, I’m -- “

“Minseok, I know. I’m -- “

“Kibum. I know, too.” He slid into the seat across from Minho, glancing between the two of them. “Do you talk about me at school, Min?”

“Occasionally,” he said before he stuffed another bite of pizza into his mouth.

“Only good things.”

Kibum struggled to keep his amusement from showing and Minho kept eating to keep his mouth full. Minseok squinted. “I don’t believe you.” Minho started to laugh, but all three of them quieted with Mr. and Mrs. Choi walked back into the kitchen.

“So,” Mr. Choi said, taking his seat at the head of the table while Mrs. Choi fixed him a plate. “You’re the famous Kibum.”

He spared a quick glance at Minho. The tips of his ears, as well as his cheeks, were a bright red as he stared pointedly at the table. “I don’t know about famous, sir, but yes.”

Minseok snickered, stopping when Mr. Choi cleared his throat. They all started eating after a second of awkward silence. Mr. and Mrs. Choi filled each other in about their days while the boys ate. Once Kibum was full, Minho stopped eating and cleared their plates from the table. Kibum followed him into the kitchen, rinsing the plates when Minho washed them and set them on a towel to dry. They washed the other plates too after Minseok brought them in.

Once the water was drained, Minho led him upstairs, away from the sounds from the other room downstairs. “What was that?” he whispered as they climbed the stairs.

“Dad is probably just watching football on TV. Do you wanna shower before bed?”

“Sure.”

“Okay, grab your stuff and I’ll show you how it works”

It didn’t take Kibum long to shower, and soon he was tucked between his blankets. Minho flicked off the light, accidentally bumping into the air mattress on his way to bed. “Sorry.”

“It’s okay.” Beside him, there came a creak and a sigh, and Kibum glanced over to see that Minho had settled into bed. He stared at his silhouette for a second before he looked up at the stars on the ceiling. "Are...”

“Hmm?”

“Are those in constellations?”

Minho hummed his assent. “I tried, at least.”

“You did a good job.” There came a delayed thanks from the shadows to his right, a hint of a smile coloring Minho’s voice. “So,” Minho’s head turned on his pillow. “What have you told your family about me?” He glanced up when Minho turned on his side to face him.

“Everything, I guess.”

Kibum pulled his blankets up over his shoulder as looked at Minho. The moonlight softly lit the top of his head, the bridge of his nose, and the tips of his fingers peeking out from under his blanket. His face was still cloaked in shadow, but Kibum could feel his eyes on him. Kibum blinked, and the moonlight seemed to fade, if only slightly. “What -- “ he cleared his throat when his voice cracked. “What do you mean by ‘I guess’?”

Minho sighed, his fingers twitching around his blanket. “Everything I could remember, I guess. Like, how you helped me learn English in first year, and then again after my concussion.” He stretched a little as he yawned. “About that one time you almost fell through the lake. When you got sick but wouldn’t admit it...”

“I wasn’t sick. it was allergies.”

“Listen, Bummie, Pomfrey agreed with me so shush.”

“Whatever.” Kibum smiled, warmth blooming in his chest. He wrapped his arms around his pillow, hugging it. “What else?”

Minho yawned again. “I don’t know. Can’t remember. Mom does like you though, I think.”

Kibum’s brow furrowed. “Really?” It didn't necessarily seem like it.

He nodded against his pillow. “Something about...about liking that she knows that...there’s someone at school who cares about me...I think...” His voice grew quieter and quieter until it dropped off completely. Kibum listened to his steady breathing for a moment before he rolled onto his back.

It took him a little while to start to drift off -- being in a strange bed and all. Once he did, however, his throat became increasingly dry. Soon, he was wide awake because of it. With a quiet groan, he sat up, wrapping his blanket around him as he slowly got out of bed and shuffled to the door.

There was a light still on downstairs, stopping Kibum in his tracks. Was it just a nightlight or was someone still up? No, someone was still up, he could hear their voice. He started to descend the stairs, freezing when one of the steps creaked under his foot.

The voices quieted for a second, and a shadow passed over the open kitchen door before they spoke again. “It’s not like he’ll be here much longer,” Mrs. Choi said, her voice sounding like a tired sigh. “It’s just until the end of the week. And it’s not like you’ll be here often.”

Kibum slowly sat down on the step, wrapping his arms around himself. “I don’t want Minseok here either, then, you know, just in case. I’ll take him with me to work.”

“Of course.” Silence stretched between them for a moment. “He is Minho’s friend...I don’t think he’d do anything to harm us.”

“I guess.”

Kibum jumped when a hand grabbed his shoulder. He turned, expecting to see Minho behind him, but found Minseok instead. He gestured behind him, and crept back to his room, Kibum quietly following. He closed the door and flipped on the light once Kibum was inside.

“How much did you hear?” Minseok asked as he walked past him on his way to his bed.

Did he know? Kibum stared at him for a moment, searching his expression for any sort of clues. “Not much, but enough.”

“Yeah.” Minseok rubbed his hands over his face, sighing heavily.

“Is that why he always takes you with him to practice? Because of Minho?” When Minseok didn’t respond right away, Kibum went on. “Like, I know they were talking about me, but it sounds like what happened here last summer.”

Minseok looked up at him, his brow furrowing. “Minho told you about that?” More or less...Kibum nodded. “I think it is, even if Dad won’t admit it.”

Kibum let out a disdained huff before he sank to the floor, crossing his legs beneath him. “What the hell for?”

“I think, well, I think Dad is just, like, struggling with the idea that one of his sons is a wizard. It doesn’t help that Minho refuses to do magic to prove that he actually is a wizard -- “

“That’s against the law for us, though.”

“Right, that’s what he said.” Minseok sighed again. “I think just the fact -- that he’s magical -- really freaked Dad out...He doesn’t talk to me about it, but I’ve heard him say stuff to Mom when they think I can’t hear them.”

Kibum couldn’t help but ask, “What sort of stuff?”

Minseok started to speak, but quickly closed his mouth and averted his gaze, shaking his head. “I don’t remember.”

His hands fisted in his blankets, tugging it a little tighter around himself. “What do you think?” Kibum’s jaw clenched when Minseok met his eyes again. “About Minho? What do you think?”

“I don’t think he’s a freak, if that’s what you’re asking. Like not at all.” Kibum started to relax a little bit. “I wish I could go with him and see all the cool stuff he tells me about, but...yeah.”

Kibum nodded. He seemed nice enough and supportive of Minho, which was good. If Minho’s stories about Minseok were to be believed, he basically hung the sun in the sky. “I...I’m glad he has you to come home to.”

“And I’m glad you’re there for him at school.”

Kibum gave him a small smile before he stood and headed for the door. “Going to practice with your dad tomorrow?”

“Probably. Maybe.” Minseok smiled back. “I might try to stay home.”

“Okay.” Kibum closed the door behind him, tiptoeing down the hall to Minho’s room, his previous thirst forgotten. Carefully and quietly, he crept back into his bed and rolled on his side to face Minho. His hand laid limply off the bed, his thumb twitching occasionally.

It wasn’t fair.

It wasn’t fair that someone as sweet and kind and giving as Minho would have to come home to...to parents who can’t seem to accept a major part of who he was. He already knew this visit was going to be different when they started to plan it last year, but he wasn’t expecting this. He glanced past the tips of Minho’s fingers to where his face was hidden by the night.  

“I know you’re asleep, buddy,” Kibum whispered. “But I want you to know that I’ll always be there for you. No matter what. I’ve got your back like you’ve got mine.” He glanced back at his hand, and after a second of thought, he hooked their pinkies together. “I promise.”

* - * - *

In the haze of early morning, Minho’s only warning was a slight clink. By the time his eyes had barely started to open, it was too late.

Ice cold water, followed by the ice cubes themselves, poured onto his neck and back. Minho’s eyes squeezed shut before he launched himself out of bed, tripping over the empty air mattress and falling onto the floor.

Looking up, he saw Minseok standing over his bed, drinking the rest of the water from the glass.

“Breakfast is ready.” He cackled and ran out the door when Minho threw his cleat at him. “Hurry up!” he called from the hall, his heavy footsteps thundering down the stairs.

Grumbling to himself, Minho took off his soaked shirt and tossed it into his hamper. He was about to go downstairs in just his shorts, but then he looked back at the empty air mattress. He could feel his face heat up as he looked around for a shirt of some kind, finding and pulling on one of his many hoodies and heading out the door. Before he went downstairs, however, he hurried to the bathroom, combing his hair into place with his fingers.

“Good morning!” he said as he walked through the doorway and into the kitchen.

Kibum looked up from the table, smiling brightly at him. “Morning!”

The TV was on in the living room, but Minho couldn’t tell what was playing. He scooped some slightly burnt scrambled eggs and a couple slices of bacon from the discarded pans around the kitchen and grabbed two of the frozen waffles from the toaster. “Where’s Mom?”

Kibum shrugged, and Minseok answered from the other room. “Dad took her out for breakfast!”

“Ahh.” Kibum was pouring him a glass of orange juice, and he slid it in front of the seat beside him as Minho came into the dining room. “Sleep okay?”

“Mmhm.” He took a sip of his own juice, his brow furrowing. “So I know that this isn’t pumpkin juice but it kinda looks like it and I’m each time I take a drink I’m surprised.” Minho almost snorted scrambled eggs out of his nose and Kibum patted his back as he coughed. “It wasn’t that funny.”

“It’s not you,” Minseok said as he went through the dining room to the kitchen. “He’s super giggly in the morning.”

“Oh really?”

Both of them turned to him, and Minho’s face felt like it was trying to spontaneously combust. “Leave me alone,” he muttered, trying not to laugh, as he gathered his plate and glass and tried to go hide in the living room. Oh great, Minseok had been watching Shrek...that never made him laugh. Minho situated himself in Dad’s armchair and continued eating his breakfast as Donkey tried to get out of Dragon’s clutches.

Kibum followed him into the room, stopping dead in his tracks as he stared at the TV. “What’s that?”

“You’ve never seen Shrek?” When Kibum shook his head, Minho scrambled for the remote, starting it all the way over. He hummed along to All-Star, and glanced over at Kibum. “This is the song the team listens to before a game.”

“Oh...”

Kibum sat in rapt attention of the movie, not even looking away from the screen when Mom and Dad got home. Minho started to get out of Dad’s chair when he walked into the living room, but he gestured for him to stay put. “Ready to go?” he asked Minseok.

“Can I stay home today?” Minho’s eyes widened as his gaze flicked from Dad to Minseok. “It’s not like I do much of anything when I’m there.”

“But you’re learning the entire time. How are you going to make it as a football player if you don’t learn from the professionals?”

Minho glanced back at Kibum, to check if his attention had shifted from Shrek to the conversation, but it hadn’t.

“It’s just one day. Is one day really gonna make that much of a difference?”

Dad’s jaw tightened and he met Minho’s eyes, seemingly surprised to find him watching. Minho quickly turned back to the TV, lounging as casually as possible in the armchair. “I’ll be late,” he said, kissing Mom’s cheek before he left the room.

In his peripheral vision, Minho saw Minseok visibly relax. When Dad’s car puttered away outside, Minho glanced over at his brother, smiling when he looked back.

Minho -- and Minseok, when he didn’t go with dad to work -- spent the next several days showing Kibum as many Muggle things as possible. It took him a couple of hours to get the hang of how to play video games, but he seemed to prefer to sit back and watch while Minho played.

Unsurprisingly, football, much like Quidditch, was not one of his interests, but he still joined them when he and Minseok went outside to pass the ball around the yard. He sat on the ground, picking at the grass while he chatted with Minho and Minseok. Sometimes, Minho got too involved in their discussion that he forgot to pass the ball back.

One afternoon, when Kibum went inside for a minute to make himself some tea, Minseok called him over. “What’s up with you?”

Minho frowned, confused. “What do you mean?”

“You’re acting like the guys do at school when the girls come to watch us play.” Minho blinked, averting his eyes when his face started to heat up. “It’s only Kibum.”

“I know.”

Minseok lightly kicked the ball back and forth before he kicked it up with his toe. He caught it and tossed it against Minho’s chest, who then caught it. “Pass it back,” he said, gesturing for him to return to his spot across the yard.

Minho started walking back, looking up when the sliding glass door opened and Kibum stepped out, a mug in hand.

One Muggle activity that Kibum really did seem to enjoy was watching TV, specifically movies. The Chois had never really had that big of a movie collection, but Mom had a soft spot for Studio Ghibli movies, so they had a bunch of those. After they had watched Howl’s Moving Castle, Kibum wanted to watch them all, and Minho was more than happy to oblige him.

One night, as they were trying to fall asleep, Kibum whispered, “You know what? I think Miyasaki is a wizard.”

Minho smiled as he glanced over at Kibum’s silhouette. “I think you’re right.”

Most nights, after Mom and Dad thought they had all gone to bed, Minseok would come into Minho’s room and he would ask them questions about Hogwarts and they would regale him with stories about their experience so far. It was nice for him to be able to talk freely about school at home, but it was also fun to watch Kibum get to talk about it, too.

His eyes would light up with each new question that Minseok had for them, and his voice got really fast as he tried to pack as much information -- relative to the question or not -- into each of his answers.

Had Kibum always had dimples? They seemed to be showing up more and more as his visit continued and he felt more comfortable with Minseok...maybe Minho just didn’t notice before.

“Minho, is something wrong?”

“Hm, what?” He blinked, meeting Kibum’s eye as the dimple on his cheek disappeared.

Kibum snorted and Minseok laughed. “You’ve just been staring at me.”

“Sorry, I, uh, I was trying to remember the, uh, wand motions for the spell you were referring to.”

“Petrificus Totalus?”

Sure. Whatever.

Kibum grabbed a licorice wand from the pile of candy he got out of his satchel and did the motion, and Minho nodded, taking the licorice from him and eating it with a grin when Kibum rolled his eyes.

On Kibum’s last night in the Choi household, Minho and Kibum decided to share some Bertie Bott’s beans with Minseok, but not tell him the secret. Kibum poured the entire box into his hand, dividing them evenly between the three of them. He passed Minho’s his with a quick wink.

“Oh, these are just jelly beans,” Minseok said, popping one into his mouth.

When he did not react right away, Minho let out a pent-up breath. “Yeah,” Kibum said as he nonchalantly picked through his. “I didn’t know you guys had them, too.”

Minseok scoffed. “Where’d you think you guys got the idea from?” he asked as he popped a mottled brown bean in his mouth. Dirt...Minho bit his lip to keep from laughing. Minseok grimaced as he chewed and shivered as he swallowed before he grabbed a bright green one. Vomit. Minho saw Kibum start to look toward him and he made himself turn away. “What the fuck?” he sputtered, spitting out the remnants for the bean.

All three were laughing so hard that Dad had to come upstairs to tell them to quiet down and go to bed. After Minseok left the room, they could hear him brushing his teeth for five straight minutes. Both Minho and Kibum couldn’t stop giggling, especially after Minho tried to sober himself enough to say, “It’s not that funny.”

Morning came all too soon, unfortunately.

It wasn’t even nine in the morning by the time Mom had he and Kibum out the door and on the way to the train station. It was stupid to be sad that he wouldn’t be around the house anymore. It had only been a week, but Minho had grown rather accustomed to being with Kibum night and day.

His room would feel so empty, now.

“Got all your stuff?” Mom asked Kibum, who nodded.

All three of them piled out of the car and headed inside, Minho and Kibum hanging back while Mom paid for his ticket with the money Grandma sent.

“I’m gonna miss you,” Minho wanted to say, but he held his tongue. Instead, he clasped his hands behind his back, knocking shoulders with Kibum and grinning when he acted affronted. “I’m coming over in two weeks, right?”

“That’s the plan, so I certainly hope so.” Kibum’s smiled dimmed slightly when Mom started back toward them, handing Kibum his ticket. “Thank you for letting me stay with you, Mrs. Choi.”

“You’re welcome, Kibum. It was no trouble at all.”

He nodded, glancing between the two of them before he waved goodbye to Minho with a dimpled smile. As Kibum started to walk away, Mom’s arm rested across Minho’s shoulder, and she guided him toward the exit. He looked back for one last glimpse of Kibum, but he was already gone.

* - * - *

“Do you think we’ll make it in time?”

Kibum’s grip tightened on the handle as the Knight Bus made a rapid turn around a corner. He and Grandma had set out for Nottingham Station about five minutes ago, which was about twenty minutes later than they were expecting. Mrs. Prue, one of their neighbors, came over to get a couple pinches of powdered unicorn horn from Grandma’s store and the two ended up talking for much longer than Kibum would have liked.

Minho’s train was supposed to be in at noon, and it was ten till that when Grandma hailed the Knight Bus.

“I’m sure we will, sweetheart. And if not, it’s not the end of the world.”

He pouted a little as he peeked outside at the blur of the passing scenery. The bus stopped three more times -- either to let passengers off or on -- before they reached Nottingham Station. Once it came to a stop, Grandma grabbed Kibum’s sleeve before he could bolt for the exit. “Why don’t you go get him and come right back? That way we don’t have to wait for the bus again.”

“Yes, ma’am.” She stood, following him to the door so she could speak to the driver and the shrunken head and ask them to wait for a moment.

Once his feet hit the pavement, Kibum took off toward the entrance, scanning the crowd once he was inside. He was about to call out for Minho, but then he saw him coming out of the restroom. He waved with he spotted Kibum, jogging around people to meet him by the door.

“Hey,” Minho said once he reached him, his voice a little breathless.

“Hi.” He grinned and Kibum couldn’t help but follow suit, but before he got too distracted -- “We gotta go, the bus is waiting.”

“Oh, shit, okay.” He followed Kibum out the door, running across the sidewalk to where the Knight Bus sat idling.

“Took ya long enough!” the shrunken head said when they hurried up the steps.

Minho gasped, grabbing the back of Kibum’s shirt as he stared open-mouthed at the shrunken head. Kibum pulled him along before the head could say anything sarcastic, leading him to where Grandma sat on one of the only bolted down seats on the entire bus. He set his backpack down on the ground before he greeted her with a hug.

“How have you been, darling?” she asked as he sat beside her -- on a non-bolted down seat. Kibum suppressed a smile as he held onto the strap before them.

“Good. What about you, Grandma?”

Any possible conversation from Minho died when the bus jolted forward, swerving madly around in the Muggle traffic on its way out of the Nottingham Station parking lot. By the time they reached home, Minho was clinging to the closest bar for dear life. “Come on, buddy,” Kibum said with a laugh, patting his arm to remind Minho to let go.

They helped Grandma inside and Minho dropped his backpack at the door as he slipped off his shoes, staring at the inside of Kibum’s home with bright-eyed amazement.

The walls were painted a rich mustard, but ivy from the potted plants in the living room crept along the walls and the ceiling, twisting around the banister leading upstairs. Handwoven rugs lined the hall, and Kibum followed him down to the kitchen, both sitting at the counter as Grandma put a kettle on.

“Your house feels like the common room!”

She smiled at Minho as she started making three teabags. “That’s what Kibum said.”

Kibum’s eyes widened when Minho stiffened beside him. He cleared his throat. “When did Jjong’s mom say he’d be done with his guitar lessons?”

“Not sure. I think she said 1 o’clock. Need something, dear?” Kibum glanced over at Minho, who was staring at the icebox.

“I’m really thirsty.” She nodded and moved to get him a glass and fill it from the sink next to the icebox. He drank it in one drink, swallowing thickly. “Would you like more?” she asked as the kettle started to sing.

“I can get it.” He hopped off the chair and went around the counter to pour himself another glass. “Oh, hey, that’s us!” Minho gestured to the polaroids posted on the icebox. He sipped the water and inspected the pictures as Grandma poured their tea behind him. His hand froze in front of one -- at this distance, Kibum couldn’t tell which on it was -- and when Grandma had set their tea on the counter, it was gone and Minho was back in his seat.

Minho started at the sound of the phone ringing, which was rather loud compared to the sound of his mom’s cell phone. Grandma was quick to answer it. “Oh, Sandra, hello!”

Really? Mrs. Prue again? Sighing, Kibum looked over at Minho. “This’ll take a while.”

“Can we take the tea to your room?”

“Oh, yeah! Grab your stuff and I’ll show you where it is.”

Minho followed Kibum to his room, closing the door behind him as soon as he stepped inside. “So, this is it,” Kibum said, gesturing to the small room.

It was a little smaller than Minho’s bedroom, or maybe it just felt that way with how much more stuff Kibum had stuffed in his room. Grandma had charmed the bed to stretch to a queen size, so they could share it instead of making Minho sleep on the very uncomfortable couch downstairs. All along the walls hung the many polaroids from their first two years at school, as well as prints from around the world that Mom took for work. He glanced back at Minho to see his reaction, but found him staring at the polaroid in his hands.

Kibum’s heart sank. If it was the one he took from off the icebox... “I can explain.”

Minho met his eyes, his mouth twisted in a sort of frown. He moved past him to the bed, dropping his backpack at the foot before he sat down. When he tossed the polaroid to the side, Kibum joined him on the bed, picking up the picture. Yup, it was his favorite from his stay in the Hufflepuff dorm, when he was bugging Minho in the common room while he was reading.

“I thought you said you weren’t gonna show her any of these,” he said, his voice quiet.

“I...wasn’t planning on it, but...”

“But, what? You couldn’t help it?”

Kibum’s brow furrowed. “Don’t take that tone with me, you don’t understand.”

“Really? I don’t?”

“You’re family aren’t...” He stopped, shutting his mouth quickly. The door downstairs opened and closed, both of them distracted by the noise. Kibum went to his closet door, opening it and nodding for Minho to get inside. His brow furrowed in utter confusion but he stepped inside and Kibum followed him in, mostly closing the door behind him. “I just don’t want us to be overheard.”

“Mm.” For a moment, the only sound in the closet was their quiet breathing, but Minho soon broke the silence. “I know I’m just a Muggle-born -- “

Kibum squeezed his eyes shut. “Minho, I didn’t mean -- “

“ -- so I don’t understand what it means to be a legacy or whatever at Hogwarts, but I do know you.” Kibum opened his eyes, meeting Minho’s gaze. “It’s gotta be eating you up inside, not being truthful with her. How much longer are you gonna put yourself through this...this stress?”

"I...don't know." Sighing, Kibum shook his head. “You...you won’t tell her this week, will you?”

“Of course not.” Kibum slumped back, his head knocking back against the wall. “It’s not my secret to tell. I won’t mention it again once we step outside the closet.”

“Thank you. And Min?” He glanced at him, his eyebrows raising in question. “I’m sorry for even implying that...because you’re Muggle-born...you...”

Minho’s expression softened. “It’s okay, Bummie, I know you didn’t mean it like that.” He opened his arms and pulled Kibum into a hug. “Are we good?” he mumbled into Kibum’s shoulder.

“Yea -- “

Both froze when Kibum’s bedroom door opened. “Ki?” Oh, it was only Jonghyun. “Grandma said you guys would be up...here...” He opened the ajar closet door, looking up at both of them in bewilderment. “What the hell are you guys doing?”

Slowly, Minho dropped his arms from around Kibum and Kibum took a step back. Minho shrugged and shook his head while Kibum said, “You mean you don’t often hug your friends in closets?”

Jonghyun snorted. “Well, I mean, yeah,” he said as he stepped inside the closet to give Kibum and then Minho a quick hug. “So, what's up, guys?”

* - * - *

Minho felt sort of stupid, now.

He had been quite nervous -- and he kept it from Kibum -- about seeing Jonghyun again. They had only seen each other for maybe ten whole minutes last summer, and, yeah they had gotten along for those ten minutes, but he was here for a full week.

Being greeted with a warm smile and hug? Almost totally eradicated his nervousness, which was a relief. After about a minute of him talking about his music lesson, his eyes widened. “Oh my god, I forgot! Follow me!”

Minho glanced at Kibum, who looked equally confused, and they both followed him downstairs and out the door. Jonghyun had the backyard gate open and closed it behind them. “What are we doing, Jj -- “

“Wait, wait!” He called out behind him, and ran through the back door.

“What do you think it is?” Minho whispered.

“Could be either really good or really stupid. Last time it was a kazoo he found in the street.” Minho couldn’t help but laugh. It wasn’t long before Jonghyun rejoin them outside, a gray and black speckled puppy writhing in his arms in an effort to lick his chin. Kibum gasped, hurrying to meet him and pet the puppy’s head with the tips of her fingers. “I love him.”

“Her.”

“Her. What’s her name?”

“Byulroo.“

Kibum frowned. “Why call her that? It seems rude.”

"We found her in a box on the side of the read on the way home from my lesson. Mom said something like: ‘Oh, that’s really not good,’ and she sorta yipped after that so that’s what I decided to name her.”

Minho held his hand still as she licked his fingers. “She’s so cute.”

“Isn’t she?” Jonghyun grinned up at him before looking back at Byulroo. “You’re so precious. I love you so much.” He cleared his throat, his voice switching from baby-talk to back to normal. “What are we doing today?”

Both Minho and Jonghyun looked at Kibum. “Not sure, but Mom will be home soon and we’re planning on going to Diagon Alley because I need new robes.” He glanced between them. “Other than that, I don’t know.”

“Mind if I come with?”

Kibum looked over at Minho, who gave him the slightest nod. “Sure, if you want, I don’t mind.”

It didn’t take long before Kibum’s mom came home. She found them rather easily, as all three were...loudly giddy at Byulroo’s -- or Roo, as Jonghyun had nicknamed her -- presence. The tiny puppy was soon safely inside with Jonghyun’s mom and sister and the boys were all tucked into the back seat of Kibum’s mom’s car.

On the way to The Leaky Cauldron, Minho and Kibum silently agreed to torment Jonghyun, who had the misfortune of sitting in the middle of the back seat. Kibum kept poking his side, nodding for Minho to do the same after a moment. By the time they reached the pub, Jonghyun had trapped both of their hands in his, tightening his grip when either of them tried to make a move against him.

The lanes between the shops of Diagon Alley were bustling with the back to school crowd, so the boys huddled behind Mrs. Kim as she led them to Madam Malkin’s. When she stepped inside, Kibum turned to them. “Hey, if you want to wait with me, that’s fine, but if you want to look around that’s fine, too.”

Jonghyun patted Minho’s back. “We’ll look around.”

“Meet us at Fortescue’s, I think.”

“Will do.” Kibum nodded, turning around and heading inside. “Do you have all of your school shopping done?” Jonghyun asked once the door swung shut.

“Yeah, Mom and I came once we got the list.”

“Ah.” Both were quiet for a moment. For Minho’s part, he was feeling slightly awkward at being alone with Jonghyun for the first time. It was probably the same for Jonghyun. He stepped back from the stairs as Jonghyun descended them.

“Do...do you miss Hogwarts?” Minho asked as they started walking down the lane.

“Well,” Jonghyun said, drawing out the word. “Yes and no. I wish I could be there with you two because I feel like that’d be so much fun. And I really got along well with Flitwick -- my head of house.”

“Oh, right! Kibum mentioned that you were in Ravenclaw.”

Jonghyun smiled fondly. “Yeah. But I really like Beauxbatons, too. And since I’ve been there longer, it feels more like home than Hogwarts does.”

“Have you learned any French?”

“Oui,” he said with a quick wink, and Minho grinned, turning to hide his slight blush. “My new house is Merprin, which is basically the equivilent of Ravenclaw over there.”

Jonghyun answered any questions Minho had about the differences between the schools as they walked in and out of shops, not paying much mind to which shops they walked into. Much to both their surprise, they were soon assaulted by an overwhelming concoction of perfumes and incense.

“Oh god,” Jonghyun muttered and Minho sneezed twice before the left the shop. “So, that reminds me...one time PJ -- PIerre, one of the roommates I mentioned -- decided to douse Vincent’s pillow in his sister’s perfume.”

“Oh no...”

“Yeah, our room stunk for days, it was bad.”

“I can imagine. One time,” he held back a laugh at the memory. “One time Taemin, one of my friends back in Korea, came to school with a mustache drawn on his face in permanent marker. His older brother did it when he was sleeping.”

“Did he know?”

“Not until second period.”

“Oh my god. Wait...” he stopped, grabbing the sleeve of Minho’s shirt to make him stop, too. “That gives me an idea.” He explained on his way to the ice cream parlor, but it sounded like all they would need to prank Kibum one of these nights was some of Sodam’s new lipstick. “You like chocolate?” Minho nodded, and Jonghyun stepped inside as he gestured for him to wait outside.

Minho settled into one of the chairs, letting out a sigh as he watched the crowd. He spotted Travis and Tanner going into the broomstick shop, but they didn’t see him.

It was nice getting to know Jonghyun. Based on all of Kibum’s stories, he almost sure that he would like him a lot, but he was happy and even relieved that that was turning out to be the case. He searched the lane and soon found Madam Malkin’s shop. As much fun as he was having with Jonghyun, he was looking forward to Kibum’s return.

“Here you go!” Minho looked up at the sound of Jonghyun’s sing-song voice, smiling when he saw the proffered chocolate milkshake.

“Thanks.” Jonghyun sat across from him, sipping happily at his own strawberry milkshake while Minho pulled his straw out and licked the whipped cream off of it before sticking it back in. He glanced over at Jonghyun when he felt his eyes on him, his expression surprisingly sober. “What is it?”

“There’s, uh, something I want to say...and...now that I know you a little better, I think I can.” Minho gulped, dread settling in his chest. Jonghyun continued. “I don’t know how much Kibum has told you about his...well, I don’t want to call it ‘his past’ because that sounds a little weird but that’s what it is. Anyways, I don’t know how much he’s said, but it hasn’t exactly been easy for him.”

“Right.”

“Like,” he paused to drink more of his shake, “He’s moved around a lot and because of that it’s hard for him to keep whatever friendships had. You won’t tell him I told you this -- “ Minho shook his head. “ -- but when he found out that I would be in France during the school year because of my parents' divorce, he cried. Several times, I think.”

“Oh, no...”

“He tried to keep it from me, but the day before I left, he was helping me pack and he started to tear up when he asked me to remember to write to him. Grandma says he has problems with feeling abandoned.”

Minho looked down at his straw before he took a long sip. Maybe that was part of why he kept lying to Grandma about being in Slytherin...because he thought she’d abandon him. It would make sense.

“I’m saying all that to, well, thank you, I guess.”

“Thank me?”

“For being such a great friend to him. God, I can’t tell you how many goddamn letters I’ve gotten where he’s telling me about all the stupid stuff you two do together.” Both of them chuckled, and Minho kept sipping his shake. “He deserves only the best, so I’m glad he has you.”

“And you.”

“Yes, well, that goes without saying.” Minho almost spit his milkshake out and Jonghyun laughed loudly, turning the heads of the people walking into the ice cream parlor.

“What’s so funny?” Kibum asked, Minho jumping at his seemingly sudden reappearance. When neither Minho nor Jonghyun answered immediately, he gestured for Minho to pass him his shake. “Did you guys have fun?” he asked in between sips.

Jonghyun met Minho’s eyes with a smile. “Yeah, we did.”

When they got home, Jonghyun left them to go back to his house. Grandma had dinner practically ready by the time they stepped inside, and Kibum joined her in the kitchen to get the dishes to set the table. Minho straightened his and Kibum’s shoes by the door before he hurried to help him.

Each meal Grandma made during Minho’s visit either reminded him of being back in Korea or being back at Hogwarts.

In the days that followed, Minho and Kibum -- and sometimes Jonghyun -- helped Grandma tend to her backyard garden. The first time Minho saw it, he stood on the porch in awe for a second before Kibum pulled him along with a laugh. It almost looked as though one of the greenhouses at school had been transplanted here in Nottingham.

Apparently, Grandma supplied ingredients to the apothecary in Diagon Alley, which is why Mrs. Prue was over as often as she was since she was one of the healers on staff there.

There were plants there that Minho didn’t recognize, but luckily Grandma sat out on the porch, very much willing to answer any questions he or Kibum may have had while she knitted. Somedays, she let them be, leaving at the appearance of Mrs. Kim.

One day, when Jonghyun was over to help them, Grandma and Mrs. Kim were about to leave. “Don’t do anything I wouldn’t do,” she told them with a wink.

All three of them nodded, but Kibum waited until the door was closed behind her to say, “Sprout told me a lot of stories. We have more leeway than you might think.”

After dinner most nights, Minho and Kibum took turns showering before they went to bed. Once the lights were out and they were tucked in, they discussed the coming year and how excited they were about the prospect of having different choices for electives.

“I’m thinking about taking Muggle Studies,” Kibum said one night, and Minho hummed in response. “What, don’t you think it’ll be interesting?”

“I mean, probably, but what would I learn from that?”

“True.” He glanced over to where Kibum laid but saw only darkness. “I mean, I guess we don’t have to take the same electives. At least one, I think, if you want.”

“Divination?”

Kibum snorted. “That works. Which other one do you want to take?”

“My dad said I had to take Arithmancy, since that’s the closest one to math which makes it practical.”

“Hm. Good luck with that.”

Minho chuckled. “Thanks.”

One of the nights, closer to the end of Minho’s visit, Jonghyun invited them over to have a camp out in his backyard, complete with the Muggle treats s’mores -- “That’s what they’re called, right?” Minho nodded, amused. Jonghyun’s mom, the other Mrs. Kim, trapped a flame in a jar for them to roast their marshmallows with before she left them to their own devices.

Once the s'mores were eaten and the flame was extinguished, they laid huddled together, reading their fortunes in the stars through the clear ceiling of Jonghyun’s tent. They started out sort of serious, but it soon turned into them concocting the wildest stories for each other just to make the others laugh.

Kibum was the first to fall asleep, his head lolling over to rest on Minho’s shoulder. Minho froze, glancing up at Jonghyun when he pulled a tube of lipstick out of his shorts pocket. He continued to hold still for several minutes, to make sure that Kibum really was asleep, before he nodded. Jonghyun drew all over Kibum’s face as gently as he could, so as to not wake him up, before he passed it over to Minho.

“Your turn.”

Red was streaked all over Kibum’s face, his lips smeared into a terrifying smile. To be quite honest, there really wasn’t anywhere else to draw. Except...Minho carefully uncapped the lipstick with one hand and drew a small circle on the tip of Kibum’s nose.

“Perfect.”

When morning came, Minho was woken to a pillow hitting him in the face. Kibum stood over him, his face and hands stained red in an attempted to clean off the lipstick. The pillow in his hands poised to hit him again. And hit him again it did when Minho burst out laughing.

“It was...Jonghyun’s idea!” he yelled between smacks.

“You swear?”

“I promise.”

Kibum started to turn away, but paused. “Did you draw any of it?”

Minho’s eyes widened and he pointed to the tip of his nose. He half-yelled, half-laughed when Kibum hit him with the pillow again before he ran back inside. Minho quickly wrapped himself up in his blanket, shuffling after him into the house to help him.

Or Jonghyun.

He hadn’t decided yet.

* - * - *

Heat, as well as the smells of pumpkin and warm spices, radiated from the kitchen. Kibum wiped away the sweat on his brow, internally reminding himself that his current discomfort would be worth it, in the end.

It was Minho’s last full day there, so Grandma was giving him a first-hand lesson on how she makes pumpkin pasties.

Kibum turned the page of his book, humming to himself. Really, he wasn’t all that focused on the book -- the page was nothing but a blur of black and white -- he was just trying to distract himself. Looking away from the book and into the kitchen, he saw a very concentrated Minho rolling out the dough, flour dusted across his chin and cheeks and hair.

He smiled to himself as he tried to refocus on his book, only to be distracted again by the front door opening and closing.

Jonghyun dropped into the armchair across from him, the discarded copies of a week’s worth of Daily Prophet’s crinkling beneath him. “Wanna do something?”

“Nah, I’m reading.”

Jonghyun glanced down at the book, smirking. “It’s upside down, genius.”

Kibum blushed to the tips of his ears as he flipped the book right side up. “Don’t you have Roo to play with?”

“Mom took her to get shots or something.”

There came a clatter from the kitchen, and Kibum looked over to find just Grandma standing there. Minho popped up a second later, rolling pin in hand. “Maybe you should just roll it out,” he said.

“No, honey, you’ve got to learn this for yourself.”

Kibum glanced back at Jonghyun before focusing on his book again, only to do a double take and stare at him. His chin was resting on his hands, and he let out a long sigh with a dreamy sort of smile as he fluttered his eyelashes at Kibum.

He blinked once, twice, before he lowered his voice to a whisper. “What the...fuck are you doing?”

“What? Is this not how friends look at each other? With soft adoration?”

Kibum’s face was ablaze, he knew it and he knew Jonghyun could see it, judging by his growing smile. “Soft adoration? Did you learn that in your creative writing class?”

“Maybe so. Doesn’t make it not true for you, though.” Kibum rolled his eyes and went back to re-reading the same sentence for the fifth time.

He made it through a full two pages by the time the pumpkin pasties were ready to eat. Minho brought one in for them both and waited anxiously for them to eat theirs. Kibum ate his quickly, despite it being too warm, savoring it as much as he could.

“This turned out really good. Good job, Min,” Jonghyun said before he directed a pointed stare at Kibum.

“Yeah,” Kibum said, clearing his throat. “Really good.”

Minho beamed at them both, and Kibum looked back down at his book with a sigh.

The next day dawned too soon, taking Minho away on the early morning train. Kibum stared out the window of the Knight Bus. “See you soon!” Minho had said when he let him go before he started to walk away.

“Yeah, in five weeks.”

Minho turned back around, his smile reaching his eyes. “That’s still soon.”

Kibum imagined the blur of the scenery was the train that Minho was on, and he couldn’t help but wish that they lived a little closer. Regardless, school would be here before he knew it, so he might as well enjoy the rest of summer while it lasted.

* - * - *

A/N: Guess what today is?? It's a year since I posted the very first chapter of this fic! Which is crazy to think about. Anyways, I hope you enjoyed the chapter ^^

[katierosefun]

oh golly gee, somehow january has already flown by (happy first month of 2022!), so we’re back with a wrap-up on whatever the heckity heck i consumed over the past month. my break went on a bit longer than it did in past years, so i had plenty of time to watch and read more stuff than i usually would...so hold onto your hats!: 

kdrama: 

happiness 

i started this show in december, stopped watching because of finals, then finished it during my last two weeks of winter break...and absolutely adored it. basically, this show is about sae bom (han hyo joo) getting fake-married to her friend yi hyun (park hyung sik). both work in different branches of the police force (sae bom as specialized police, yi  hyun as a detective), and they get fake-married in order to live in an apartment...except not everything is at seems. basically, there’s something new breaking out--tentatively called “madman’s rabies”, but really...guys, this is a zombie story. 

and yet. take it from me, someone who’s terrified of zombies (like. for some people, ghosts scare the living fuck out of them. for me? it’s zombies), this show is so much more than a zombie story. there’s fake marriage, yes, and there’s also found family, and also just overall what does it mean to be happy? and so what the fuck did we learn from covid anyways? and also all the wonderful messages about social class that we like from a survival story. 

god. ugh. this show just hit all the marks. the romance was so...i enjoyed it so much more than i thought i would, and the found family dynamic was so!!!! (god.....god sae bom can you be my big sister please) also, just like...i was so fascinated by how this show discussed covid? i actually didn’t think i’d want to watch a show that was set so closely near the pandemic, and yet...the theme of the chaos in the pandemic alongside...a zombie story...was so well done and cleverly thoughtful that i was able to watch it and feel like i was watching a real story about coping with the traumas and fears that we are unfortunately still going through today, esp. with omicron numbers going up. 

basically...i rather enjoyed this show. it’s only 12 episodes long, but weirdly, the episodes feel incredibly short, and just. overall. a very satisfying show. 

our beloved summer 

man...i haven’t watched a kdrama in primarily pastel-y/washed out/soft colors in so goddamn long, i almost forgot they existed. admittedly, i’ve watched quite a few darker korean dramas for the last few months, so i think a part of me was actually relieved to watch something that wasn’t about murder or death or zombies or the like. i watched this show while it was airing, and to be honest, i didn’t think much of it at first, but like a lot of viewers, i wound up feeling a lot of bittersweet things regarding the story. 

basically, this show is about old sweethearts yeon su (kim da mi) and ung (choi woo shik), who only started dating after being paired up together for a documentary project. now, a few years after their rather miserable breakup, they are to be in yet another documentary together as a “ten years later” sort of project. of course, now they’re at both pretty different paths: ung is now an artist, and yeon su works in a company. on paper, i think they’re both pretty successful, even despite their own challenges--but they are also both absolutely miserable, and as you might guess it, it’s because they both rather terribly miss each other. 

i really didn’t expect to actually like this drama? i like both actors, but i didn’t know that after months of really heavy and fast-paced plots, i wouldn’t know how to handle something that’s more centered on real life . . . and yet funnily enough, that was the charm of the show because even though i’m nowhere near the same place in life as our characters, the emotions were very real. i dunno how many people relate to the feeling of the one that got away or feeling still rather hung up on someone they once deeply, deeply loved--but this show was kind of a soothing balm for those feelings. very charming, very real, complete with all the slow bittersweet-resentful-but-still-loving feelings that you might expect from a show like this. if you want something soft but also something to pluck at the heartstrings, this is the show. 

all of us are dead 

i hate zombies so much, so i don’t know why i watched two zombie things in one month, but i did. 

anyways, this show is based on the webtoon of the same name--and even though i heard the webtoon’s much better and that there are significant differences from the webtoon itself, i personally thought this show was . . . hm, well, i had mixed feelings for this show. i think that in terms of zombie flicks, it’s fantastic bc it’s got the gore, the very real fear, and this themes about well, what do we do with / about kids anyways? and we have to stay hopeful and friends are important were done decently. (other themes . . . not so much, in my opinion.) 

but basically, this show is about a high school being ground zero of a zombie outbreak. there’s a pretty big cast, all of them filled with relatively new actors (which is so exciting, i can tell some of these kids are going to grow into incredibly big stars, if this series isn’t already kinda launching them into that path)--and despite my personal issues with some of them, i did like them, mostly because they were all trying so hard to live. like, idk about you guys, but i feel like if i were in their position, i would have just turned into a zombie right then and there. but like! they were trying so hard, whether it was in the act of fending off zombies or comforting each other around a campfire. seriously, i adored those moments the most. 

overall, i think this show is something that people who really love zombie stories for the horror might enjoy. there’s some frustrating plot points, and there’s some even more frustrating characters (not just in the “oh, they’re the worst” kind of way, but more like in the “? ? ? what’s their point?” kind of way), but ? ? ? y’know, it was fun to watch. (however, massive trigger warnings for implied s*xual assault, h*zing, su*cide, gore . . . there’s so much of it, and some of the gore stuff especially gets kinda brutal.)

tv shows: 

the haunting of hill house 

you know. . .i started this show in december and paused it for a while because my headspace wasn’t really able to handle the themes at that point, but around middle january, i picked up this show again and i am very glad that i did. not just because i felt like my mental health was better, but also because i thought . . . while the first half of the show was brutal (which was also what i watched during december), the second half of the show was . . . god. no words to describe how beautiful it was and how it really nailed the overarching theme of the show and how once again i am hit with the idea of horror and ghost stories as love stories and healing and god oh god 

but anyways. i. i feel like i’m late to this train but for those who don’t know, this show is about the crain family and a terrible tragedy that happened to them while the parents were trying to fix up the old hill house. now the crain siblings are all adults, but they’re still plagued by the trauma of that one horrific night and the strange happenings of the house--and it takes off from there. 

god. this show . . . i really can’t go too deep into this show without feeling like i might get perceived, but it was so beautiful and so compelling and so wonderful to me in terms of what it means to really live and also what it means to be a family, and how sometimes being a family is so complicated and messy and painful, but there is also something really lovely and sometimes there is happiness and joy and also there really is something unique about sibling bonds and also there is something so heartwrenching about loving someone who might slowly be falling apart before your eyes and oh god oh god oh god. i finished this show after i got my booster shot, and i cried so hard my fever respiked, so that should . . . that should give you an idea of the emotions i was going through. a solid show. 1000/10 would recommend, i even think i like it better than bly manor, which is saying something.

movies: 

okay....so i tried to watch this back in december, and i got through maybe 80% of it before going “you know what? now would be a fantastic time to chop of my hair with safety scissors. why not. why not!” and then proceeded to do so. because that’s kinda how this special makes you feel. (and not just bc of bo burnham’s long hair. just like. in general. desire to do something within your control.) 

that said! i really . . . is enjoyed the right word? i definitely thought inside was good, in that it really captures the whole . . . mood these days. or at least, my mood. it’s understandable why this special appealed to so many people when it first came out, when everyone was still trying to get used to the first few months of the pandemic. 

if i’m about to be honest, now that we’re officially in 2022, i suppose . . . seeing this comedy special really just made me. sit for a while and contemplate the state of the world. truly the epitome of “ha ahahaa . . .  the world is . . . not great right now but here’s some funny songs to go with it! :)” which. you know. you know. that said, my favorite songs are probably content, comedy, welcome to the internet...and look who’s inside again, all eyes on me, goodbye. (basically. the whole tracklist is fantastic.) 

given this comedy special was released . . . almost two years ago (huh) . . .i would be surprised if others hadn’t already watched this, but! i do recommend it--just maybe. make sure your head’s in a marginally okay place right now lol

the tale of princess kaguya 

i watched this right after watching inside, which was a really good idea because this was one of those movies that reminded me that, as the movie suggests, we are born to truly live. 

for those who aren’t quite as familiar with this studio ghibli movie, the tale of princess kaguya is based off the japanese folk tale the tale of the bamboo cutter. in this movie, a bamboo cutter finds a little child in a flower. this child grows quickly to become the most beautiful in the land, and given her funny “birth”, the bamboo cutter is convinced she was sent from the heavens to become the princess. i won’t go too much into detail with the plot other than that, because i feel like this is one of those movies that you should really go in blind--just as you should with quite a lot of studio ghibli movies, honestly. 

that said: i adored this movie. the only studio ghibli movie i’ve actually watched fully is spirited away and the secret world of arrietty, and i’m trying to remedy that. i initially chose this movie because it looked like it was just beautifully animated (and it is! look at this gorgeous frame!), and ofc, i came for the animation but stayed for the genuinely beautiful, fairytale-esque storytelling, the lovable protagonist kayuga, and the themes about sorrow, parent-child relationships, and what it means to truly live. what a good movie. stellar. i cried, just as i expected. 

the world of us 

you know when you stumble across a movie, show, book, whatever that is very good but also hits a little way too close to home? and so you finish it and feel empty but also healed but also just kind of like. someone patted you on the head and saw you for who you were and you feel a little terrified but also this bittersweet knowledge of being known? because that was how the world of us was to me. 

basically, this movie is about a young girl named sun (choi soo in), who’s an outcast in her school. then a new girl named jia (seol hye in) moves to the town, and she becomes quick friends with sun. for one blissful summer, they’re closer than close in the way that all childhood friends are. but then the school year starts again, and jia becomes quickly sucked in with the popular girls of the class, effectively leaving sun alone again. what ensues is mostly a lot of the bitter, very childhood-typical-esque passive aggressive bullying that would make any formerly bullied child want to crawl under the covers. overall though, it’s . . . such a touching movie. don’t be fooled by the pastels--this movie doesn’t pull back the punches on the hard-hitting themes of friendship and adolescence and all the saddest, messiest things that come with that. 

anyways. ‘tis a good movie. i felt so much during the first 30 minutes, and the next 60 minutes were somehow even better and more feels-y. 1000/10 recommend, and if you were a former bullied kid/had scarily similar experiences with sun, also be prepared to feel a lot of compassion for kids who are just Going Through It. 

joan’s galaxy 

i mean, technically, joan’s galaxy is a television episode, but it’s about an hour long and it’s a part of an anthology series, so i’m going to call this a movie. but basically, joan’s galaxy is about a world in which some people can live up to 100 years, while others can live up to 30 years because of a fine dust disaster. one day, a young woman who might have been able to live for 100 years learns that she’s actually one of those types who can only live up to 30 years. she winds up meeting someone with this same condition, and they bond over the course of about 50 minutes. 

this was just one of those rather simple, but rather lovely films that made me feel satisfied. it was a sweet love story more than anything else, and it made me feel a bit bittersweet towards the end, but oh...what it means to love someone, even if only for a brief moment. 

kiki’s delivery service 

you ever just watch a movie about burnout and suddenly feel better? because yeah. for those who don’t know, this movie follows the little witch kiki, who, now at 13 years old, is off to fly to some new city so that she can  become the local witch. she winds up starting a delivery service, and the movie kind of takes off from there and explores how she navigates her new life. 

y’know, as a kid, i could never finish this movie because i would always get stumped right around seeing kiki unable to fly/being terrified of losing her witch powers. even though i knew studio ghibli movies mostly had happy endings, something about that scene just always unsettled me. but this time, i finally finished the movie, and i’m very glad i did, because y’know. this movie really said that sometimes you just need to rest before finding your magic/spirit again, and that’s so touching. highly recommend. a really stellar studio ghibli movie, i think everyone should watch this at least once in their lives. 

what a man wants 

. . . the things i watch for shin ha kyun. the things i watch for shin ha kyun--and the things shin ha kyun makes me watch--

well. anyways. this movie is about two married couples who live (. . . together, i think? or like their houses are connected i think) and how the men are cheating on their wives. it’s all very much so a comedy, with some pretty . . . idk how to describe it? some of the twists were actually rather funny, and i actually laughed a bit in the hahaa!! that’s what you get, stupid cheater! 

you know, kinda iffy premise aside though, i weirdly liked this movie? like. it was funny but funny in the “oh dude you’re just digging yourself an even deeper grave and you deserve absolutely every bit of it” kind of way. also funny in the “oh geez y’all suck and i’m going to watch this trainwreck of your life and laugh” kinda way. maybe funny in like . . . reverse midsummer night’s dream kinda way? (idk where that comparison came from, but it makes sense in my head lol) 

tbh, would i recommend this movie? uh. idk. not really? i mean, i kinda liked the conclusion of the movie--kinda--and i thought there was some lesson and some takeaway in the movie (ie. don’t cheat on your partner! at the end of the day, you need to remember who you actually like/love!), but i also feel like if i didn’t already like shin ha kyun and song ji hyo, then i would have never gotten through this movie. so, i’ll leave it at that! 

the prince of egypt

maybe cheating because i’ve watched this movie many times before, but man . . . i was listening to this while waiting for an email from a law school i applied to back in november, and needless to say, i was incredibly stressed out. so i dunno. i decided to watch this movie because you know, there’s something incredibly significant about hearing how can you tell where your value lies and there can be miracles when you believe and i suppose i’ve just been feeling very down lately. so this movie was . . . a really beautiful reminder to me that it’s so impossible to judge the value of your life through only the present moment--and i suppose, as someone who’s religious myself, this movie really deeply moved me, and i kind of remembered through this movie oh, that’s what’s comforting about my own faith, even if i’ve felt angry and distanced from it these days. but you know, i think the creators of this movie were brilliant in making this movie so touching for people of the 3 main faiths that are aware of this story (judaism, christianity, islam) . . . like, oh. idk. i have more thoughts but i’ll write them down later.

music: 

to the island by ahn ye eun

oh my god. i just love ahn ye eun’s voice so much. i was already familiar with some of her past songs, most notably night flower and chaanggwi, but then this month, she also released haechi (which made me go insane...beyond evil fans know why), and so i decided to go into her ep which was released last year...and i regret not knowing about this ep sooner, because it was so beautiful? for those who aren’t aware, ahn ye eun is an incredibly unique korean indie songwriter and singer for specifically for how she comes from the very traditional korean music scene. her use of traditional korean instruments, as well as her incredibly unique voice, has been used for a number of saeguk (historical) dramas, and it’s easy to see why--she’s just so good at capturing so many emotions and also bringing in a musical vocal tradition that isn’t mainstream at all. 

even if you don’t understand korean, i highly recommend you give her songs a listen. i would recommend night flower and haechi first, just because those are my favorites--but this whole ep is such a gem. (or, if you’re just looking for incredibly emotional music to listen to without getting caught up in the lyrics, ahn ye eun is def. worth checking out too. i love this woman, and i can’t stop refreshing her spotify page to see if she’s releasing anything new.) 

the man upstairs by robyn hitchcock

you know, the first time i ever heard robyn hitchcock was through the ghost in you when i first watched amazon prime’s the wilds. and anyways, i dunno why (maybe nostalgia for that time), i decided to give the whole album a listen because i needed something quiet in the background . . . and oh man. oh man, this album was so great. it really is all quiet music, very minimalist with cello and acoustic guitar and vocals, but they make me feel very happy. my favorites are still totally the ghost in you and san francisco patrol. 

this empty northern atmosphere by gregory alan isakov

like the man upstairs, this album is incredibly quiet, although i would say gregory alan isakov—at least in this album—is more in the folk tradition than robyn hitchcock (who i would say is more singer-songwriter than folksy? although those genres kinda mix). but anyways, gosh. i adored this album. i got into it originally because i adore if i go, i’m goin’, which was the last song playing in the haunting of hill house. i found that the entire album is just as lovely, with really beautiful, homey sounds and comforting lyrics and just like. you ever feel like the sun’s rising or quietly summer-setting when you’re listening to music? because this is the type of music you play when the sun’s rising or when it’s summer and you just hear cicadas and you see fireflies buzzing above your head and you watch pink clouds roll by and this music would be playing in your head and you roll over on your side to reach for your sibling or your lover or your mom or whatever. that’s the kind of music in this album, and i adore it.

allegiance

you know, i had no idea this musical even existed until i heard it mentioned in a moth story by annie tan called “drumstick, please!. tan mentioned it as one of the only (if not the only) broadway musical featuring asian americans (her specific words being “people who look like me”), and so i gave it a whole listen immediately after. guys, i cried at least 3 or 4 times while listening to this relatively short musical (about an hour of songs). 

so even though i haven’t actually watched the musical, i think that, judging by the songs, it’s about a japanese-american family during japanese internment back in world war ii. for those who aren’t aware of this point in history, basically after the japanese bombed pearl harbor in hawaii, president roosevelt executed order 9006 on feb 19, 1942, effectively putting largely japanese americans into camps. it’s a bit of history americans don’t really like to acknowledge or go too into detail--but the trauma of that one bit of history still has impacts on so many japanese-american families today, and this musical really kinda goes into that. even though i’m not japanese-american myself, i did very strongly relate to this unspoken urge to present myself as American As Possible so that White Americans Could Accept Me or At Least Tolerate My Existence--which i think is a pretty common thread for lots of americans who come from immigrant families. so like. all the characters felt real and sympathetic, and by the end of the musical, you kinda come to the conclusion that a) family is important and b) dude, it fucking sucks that american society is structured in a way that it makes its immigrant children turn their backs against their own families. overall a stunning musical, really lovely. my favorite track probably has to be higher and how can you go?, which made me cry way too many tears.

[theadusa]

All the dramas I’ve watched in 2020

These are all the dramas that I watched in 2020, with some review there should be NO Spoilers. I think I watched a lot more than usual probably because what else am I supposed to do between school and quarantine. So this is gonna be a long one...

Crash Landing on You (Lee Jung-hyo, 2019-2020)

Main Leads: Hyun Bin and Son Ye-jin

Episodes: 16, 70 to 110 Minutes 

Thoughts: I enjoyed this drama, and it was a good one to start 2020 with. I thought it was a perfect blend of romance, comedy, heartfelt, found family, action, and some tragedy. I would highly recommend it, especially for those who are new to Kdramas. Also fun fact this is my first Hyun Bin drama. Rating: Fun and adorable

Tale of Nokdu (Kim Dong-hwi, 2019)

Main Leads: Jang Dong Yoon and Kim So Hyun

Episodes: 32, 35 minutes

Thoughts: I actually started watching this when it was airing but I stopped around episode 13 because of my busy schedule and finished it in the new year. I adore the main couple, the romance, comedy, the found family, and the women center story. I thought it shined the brightest when it was focused on the group and its funny and warm moments but once it got too political it kinda fell flat. I loved the ending, however. Also, I really like Jang Dong Young as an actor, I saw him in Solomon’s Perjury (2016) and Mr. Sunshine (2018) and I loved how he played Nok Du too. Rating: I love a women’s only widow village

I’ll Find You When The Weather is Nice (Han Ji-seung, 2020)

Main Leads: Seo Kang Joon and Park Min Young

Episodes: 16, 60 minutes 

Thoughts: I really liked this drama, probably one of my favorites this year. As you will notice I enjoy quieter and more slow-burn stories. Also, I am a fan of Park Min Young she tends to pick more interesting and strong-willed female roles, so it is really enjoyable to watch.  Rating: makes me want to own a book store.

King: The Eternal Monarch (Kim Eun-sook, 2020)

Main Leads: Lee Min Ho and Kim Go Eun

Episodes: 16, 70 Minutes

Thoughts: Confession; I am actually not the biggest fan of Lee Min Ho, nothing against him I just hate rich bratty characters and he tends to play them. However, I surprisingly really liked his character, he wasn’t a rich brat he actually was likable. I also really like Kim Go Eun, she is actually one of the main reasons why I watched and also with all the hype around it. Woo Do Hwan, who I have always liked, stole the whole show, however. I didn’t hate it like a lot of people, I really liked the characters, I liked the romance and the action. Also, Lee Min Ho and Kim Go Eun’s hugs were absolutely fabulous. It wasn’t my favorite and there were too many product placements, but I don’t think it was the worst drama this year. Rating: Lukewarm 

A Piece of your mind (Lee Sang-yeob, 2020)

Main Leads: Jung Hae In and Chae Soo Bin

Episodes: 12, 70 minutes

Thoughts: I actually really liked this drama despite the low views, again I’m big on slow burn stories and character focus. I believe the episodes were cut from 16 to 12 I don’t know exactly why maybe because of the Pandemic or due to viewership or a mixture of both. Despite its being cut short I really liked the ending, and I thought the two leads were sweet. Rating: Wish we had more time to develop the characters.

Its Okay not to be Okay (Park Shin Woo, 2020) 

Main Leads: Kim Soo Hyun and Seo Yea Ji and Oh Jung Se 

Episodes: 16, 70 to 85 minutes

Thoughts: Out of all the dramas I talked the most about this one. I have always been a fan of Seo Yea Ji since Save Me (2017) and Lawless Lawyer (2018) and I am happy to see her getting more recognition because of this role. The entire cast was amazing and I think I cried every episode. Such a good and heart-wrenching drama which is why I chose to watch it before work every time. Rating: I would let Seo Yea Ji stab me with a knife anytime.

Mystic Pop up bar (Jeon Chang-geun, 2020) 

Main Leads: Hwang Jung Eum and Yook Sung Jae and Choi Won Young

Episodes: 12, 70 minutes

Thoughts: I actually watched this while I was watching Its Okay Not to Be Okay and it was a nice balance to it because this was more of a found family story with less heartbreaking moments. Though it did have its share of heartbreak. I really liked all the characters and their relationship. Also, I am a sucker for bureaucratic fantasy/ magic, and kdramas are so good at it. Rating: I wish it was 16 episodes. 

When the Camila Bloom (Cha Yeong Hoon, 2019) 

Main Leads: Gong Hyo Jin and Kang Ha Neul

Episodes: 20, 63 to 75 minutes

Thoughts: I liked the story overall, the romance was cute and the mystery was interesting but I thought the family expectations was the best part of the story. This was not my favorite drama, but it was enjoyable and heartfelt. I watched it right after It's Okay Not to Be Okay and while I was watching Flower of Evil (2020) which probably is why I was so underwhelmed by it. Rating: Sweet romance and adorable found family.

Flower of Evil (Kim Cheol Kyu, 2020) 

Main Leads: Lee Joon Gi and Moon Chae Won

Episode:16, 70 minutes

Thoughts: This was my favorite drama of this year. I went into this drama not thinking much of it, and I mainly watched it as a post drama blues drama. It was an action and thriller which I mainly don’t get attached to plus I am a huge fan of Lee Joon Gi. I should have known better, I cared so much about all the characters, the acting phenomenal, also every time they showed their hands I cried. This drama left me shriveled and empty inside. Rating: Lee Joon Gi will literally kill me one day. 

Put Your Head On My Shoulders (Zhu Dongning, 2019) 

Main Leads: Xing Fei and Lin Yi 

Episodes: 24, 40 to 45 minutes

Thoughts: This is the first Chinese drama on this list. I thought it was cute, I liked the couple and thought it was alright. I started to dislike the male lead later in the series but it was overall fine. It was basic and sweet with very little drama. Rating: It did its job.

The School Nurse Files ( Lee Kyoung Mi, 2020)

Main Leads: Jung Yu Mi and Nam Joo Hyuk

Episodes: 6,  45 to 57 minutes

Thoughts: This is probably my second favorite drama. I couldn’t tell what happened in the drama but I loved it. I thought it was weird and fascinating, and just so magical. I loved the children and just how the whole school was just off its rocker. I also think that Nam Joo Hyuk does really well in serious roles, and I thought he did a really good job here. Rating: 1 jelly heart.  

Mr. Heart (Park Sun Jae, 2020) 

Main Leads: Cheon Seung Ho and Lee Se Jin

Episodes: 8, 11 Minutes

Thoughts: This was 8 episodes of start fluff and I adored it. Apparently, it is apart of a BL series by Park Sun Jae and there is a movie version that I haven’t watched. If you want to destress and watch just fluff this is the show for you. Rating: If it is any sweeter I would be going to the dentist. 

You are My Destiny ( Ding Ying Zhou, 2020) 

Main Leads: Xing Zhao Lin  and Liang Jie

Episodes: 36, 45 minutes

Thoughts: I hated this drama, I thought it was the worst thing ever. I don’t know why I even watched all 36 episodes. Apparently, it is a remake of a popular 2008 Twaniese drama Fated to Love You and there is a Korean remake of it as well. I have watched neither of them, so I was brand new to this story. I hated, despised the male lead. He was whiny, entitled, and an asshole. The only good part of the drama was the male and female lead actually had a lot of chemistry, unfortunately, they are playing awful characters. Rating: This was made in 2020???

First Romance (Ding Pei, 2020) 

Main Leads: Wan Peng and Riley Wang

Episodes: 24, 45 Minutes

Thoughts: This is another Chinese drama. Similar to Mr. Heart (2020) this show was super fluffy. I really liked the main couple they seem to respect each other and they both had adorable crushes on each other. I loved the whole dumb jock and dumb artist dynamic it was so funny. Rating: Cute!!! 

Lost Romance ( Eri Hao, 2020) 

Main Leads: Marcus Chang and Vivian Sung

Episodes: 20, 70 minutes 

Thoughts: This is the only Twainese drama on this list. I think I liked this drama, I actually only remember very little of this drama. I like the CEO in the real world more than the book world, and I also really liked the female lead except she lowkey stalked the CEO like that was not okay. Rating: I think I liked it???

When We Were Young ( Deng Ke, Liu Guo Hui, 2018)

Main Leads: Neo Hou and Wan Peng and Gala Zhang and Pan Mei and Ye Marcus Li

Episodes: 24, 45 minutes

Thoughts: I really liked this film, I loved all the characters and thought it was all very heartfelt. I cried like a baby, and Hua Biao was such a touching and relatable character. And the whole grandma story hit so close to home. Rating: Made me cry like a baby.

Moment of 18 ( Sim Na Yeon, 2019)

Main Leads: Ong Seong Wu and Kim Hyang Gi

Episodes: 16, 70 minutes

Thoughts: I really liked this drama, and I thought the romance was so cute. I also really liked the relationship between the moms and was sad that the rich mom was a bitch and ruined the friendship. I also wasn’t a big fan of the ending, but I loved the rest of it. Rating: The main lead is part of a boy group because he had a random singing moment. 

Perfect and Casual ( Li Shuang, 2020) 

Main Leads: Miles Wei and Xu Ruo Han

Episodes: 24, 45 minutes

Thoughts: This is another Chinese drama on this list. I’m pretty sure it's considered an Idol drama so that sets your expectations. I really liked this drama a lot, I am a big fan of contract marriages and I thought the leads were so cute together. Also, this is the first contract marriage drama where the leads don’t break up which I like. A lot of the drama came from outside of the relationship. Rating: You can’t analyze love.

Le Coup De Foudre ( Wang Zhi, 2019) 

Main Leads: Janice Wu and Zhang Yujian

Episodes: 35, 45 minutes

Thoughts: My favorite Chinese drama on this list. I loved this drama, I thought it was sweet and simple and the main couple was so realistic. Unpopular opinion I disliked the second couple and the best friend I thought she was annoying and brattish. However, I adore the main couple and their relationship. Rating: Realistic sweet romance. 

More Than Friends ( Choi Sung Bum, 2020)

Main Leads: Ong Seong Wu and Shin Ye Eun

Episodes: 16, 70 minutes

Thoughts: I enjoyed the overall story and characters. I loved the group and their relationships. Also, Young-Hee made me cry, and her relationship with Hyun Jae was so sweet. The main leads were also sweet, and I related a lot to Lee So. I just didn’t like the back and forth. Rating: How many times can we break up in a drama. 

Be With You ( Zhou Miao, 2020) 

Main Leads: Ji Xiao Bing and Zhang Ya-Qin

Episodes: 24, 45 minutes

Thoughts: This is the last Chinese drama I watched this year. It was alright, the romance was sweet, I really like the female lead, and the male lead was nice to look at. It was okay. Also, the second couple was so ??? She was his boss, enemy, and older than him, what?? Rating: Sometimes you need to fall in love to be creative. 

Moon Lovers: Scarlet Heart Ryeo ( Kim Kyu Tae, 2016) 

Main Leads: Lee Joon Gi and Lee Ji Eun (IU) 

Episodes: 20, 60 minutes

Thoughts: I know I am really late watching this, but I finally did. I went in knowing this would hurt me and Lee Joon Gi already scared me this year ( damn this man) so I was fully prepared. I really wasn’t,  it so much. (SPOIlERS) When Wang Eun and Park Soon Deok died I sob like a baby (SPOILER ENDING). It took me a long time to finish this show because its heart so much, like it physically hurt me. The show was really good, and heartbreaking, and the ending stabs me in the heart 20 times. Rating: Lee Joon Gi is trying to kill me with tears. 

Persona ( Lee Kyoung Mi, Yim Pil Sung, Jeon Go Woon, and Kim Jong Kwan, 2019) 

Main Leads: Lee Ji Eun (IU) 

Episodes: 4, 19 to 27

Thoughts: This is a collection of mini-films by directors. 4 separate stories are starring Lee Ji Eun. I thought all of them good, especially “ Kiss Burn” and “Walking at Night.” There isn’t much else to this, more than it is an artistic display of filmmaking. Rating: Hipster Kdrama

Come and Hug Me ( Choi Joon-bae, 2018) 

Main Leads: Jang Ki-Yong and Jin Ki-Joo

Episodes: 32, 35 minutes

Thoughts: I actually just finished this show today. I really liked it, I thought it was both sweet and heartwarming/wrenching. I hated that one journalist and the public like why are they blaming a victim. I didn’t watch it with my full mind because I’ve been distracted lately, but I did enjoy it. Rating: another cute but sad couple. 

Movies I watched this year: 

Spell Bound ( Hwang In Ho, 2011)

Main Cast: Son Ye Jin and Lee Min Ki

Running Time: 114 Minutes

Thoughts: I watched this at like 12 am after a bad day and it was cute. I love RomCom fantasy, which I think Korean media does really well. I don’t know what else to say except it is a really cute romance. Rating: Is it the ghost or the butterflies

The Host ( Bong Joon Ho, 2006)

Main Cast: Song Kang Ho and Byun Hee Bong and Park Hae Il and Bae Doona and Go, Ah Sung

Running Time: 119

Thoughts: This film I had to actually watch for class. It was a really good film which is expected from Bong Joon Ho. I love monster films and I thought this was a good rendition of this film. Also, The monster was so cool especially from 2006. I thought it was heartbreaking, stirring, and so beautifully shot. Rating: Oscar-worthy Direction 

Little Forest ( Yim Soon-rye, 2018) 

Main Cast: Kim Tae Ri  and Ryu Jun Yeol and Moon So Ri and Jin Ki Joo

Running Time: 103 minutes

Thoughts: I really, really liked this film. It reminded me so much of I’ll Find You When The Weather is Nice (2020) that I thought that it was based on this film but it isn’t. I have watched this film 3 times since October and every time I watch it have made bread. I really just love everything about this film, how quiet it is, the cinematography, the acting, just everything. Rating: Three loaves of bread. 

Always ( Song Il Gon, 2011)

Main Cast: So Ji Sub and Han Hyo Joo

Running Time: 106 Minutes

Thoughts: I thought it was okay, I watched it while I was knitting so I was distracted a bit. But I thought the couple was sweet, and the characters were interesting. Rating: It's Okay.

       Currently watching 

True Beauty ( Kim Sang-hyeop, 2020-) 

Main Cast: Moon Ga Young and Cha Eun Woo and Hwang In Yeop

Episodes: 16, 70 minutes 

Thoughts: This is currently an ongoing series that is actually really popular. Apparently, it is based on a webtoon, which I haven’t read. I like it so far, I always liked Moon Ga Young and I think she is a great actress. She plays Im Ju Kyung in a likable and insecure way, instead of someone annoying which could easily happen. I will be continuing watching. Rating so far: Okey dokey yo.

Live On ( Kim Sang-woo, 2020-) 

Main Cast: Jung Da Bin and Hwang Min Hyun

Episodes: 8?, 60 Minutes

Thoughts: I really Like this show. The main couple is sweet and supportive. I really like the female lead, I like that she is cold and kinda quiet, but with a sweet spot if you are not a dick. I really like the main relationship conflict comes from friendship instead of romance, I think it makes the show more interesting. Rating: I want to Join a Broadcast group.  

On My List: 

I actually don’t have anything else on my list so if anyone has recommendations please tell me. I am thinking about watching Mr. Queen ( 2020) because I really like Shin Hye Sun. I also want to watch Sweet Home (2020) the Netflix series. But please recommend me some dramas!!!

This is such a long list, and I had fun doing it and going back over all the dramas. I hope everyone has a good New year and that we will have many more good dramas in 2021!

[tanz-der-salome]

Dear Yuletide writer,

Thank you so much for taking on my request! This is my very first Yuletide fic exchange, so I'm very excited. I hope this letter finds you well and that Yuletide is a welcome distraction for all the mess that is the world as of right now.

Onto the stories, where I’d like to say that first and foremost I enjoy when my stories are a bit dark as I tend to like rather morally grey up to downright villainous characters. I appreciate a happy ending, but they’re not essential for me to enjoy a story. I’m happy with whichever rating from G to E, although I do prefer there being some plot alongside the porn, should there be porn. I’d be overjoyed with the ships I mentioned

Things I like in a fic (gen):

Character study and/or reflection on a character’s motivations

Dialogue!

Unreliable narrators

Dysfunctional family/sibling relationships

Manipulation and mindgames

Power imbalances

Violence

Hurt & Comfort

Canon Divergence AUs

Pre-canon / backstories

Non-linear story telling

Characters being repressed

Codependency

Dark humour

Enemies or Rivals-to-lovers

Obsession (be it one-sided or mutual)

Outsider POV

Ships and Smut:

Belligerent and/or Unresolved Sexual Tension

One-sided attraction/lust (especially if it ends up not being one-sided)

Kissing everywhere but on the mouth when two characters have a sexually charged but otherwise complicated relationship and kissing on the lips would be crossing a line (I hope that’s somewhat understandable)

D/s dynamics

Awkward, weird sex

When F/M, a focus on female pleasure

Non-penetrative sex (penetrative is fine as well!)

Possessive sex

Spontaneous sex

Phone sex

Dirty talk

Humiliation

Non-con/dub-con

Sibling incest

Forbidden pleasures

Infidelity and the guilt that comes with it from the cheater

Jealousy

Do Not Wants:

Mundane AUs especially in period dramas and/or futuristic settings

Overt fluff

A/B/O

Unrequested sex changes to canon characters

Crossovers

Time Travel

Reincarnation

Requests:

1. Vincenzo - Jang Han-seo, Jang Jun-woo | Jang Han-seok, Choi Myung-hee

I chose Jang Han Seo, Jang Han Seok, and Choi Myung Hee because as someone who finds herself always fascinated with the antagonists (even if Han Seo does switch sides later on, and you may include Han Seung-hyuk since he’s also a part of the squad), I would love to read something about the Babel & Wusang "””family”””.

I’ll be happy with any potential ship constellation between the characters, with a slight preference towards Jangcest, Han-seok x Myung-hee, Han-seo/Seung-hyuk, and Seung-hyuk/Myung-hee. If you go for Jangcest, I’d only request that Han-seo is at least 15 or 16.

Prompts:

Pre-Canon AU for the Jang brothers set around the time where their father was ill.

Post-Canon where all of them survive and have to navigate their lives after the fall of the Babel Group

2. Ready Player One (2018 movie) - Nolan Sorrento, F’nale Zandor

As a villain enthusiast, both Sorrento and F'nale were characters that immediately caught my interest when watching the film, and when I found out that Andy Weir had written a fanfic called "Lacero" with Sorrento as the central character, which then was met with enthusiasm by the writer of the Ready Player One novel, I really wanted to read more about him. F'nale as a tough-as-nails henchwoman made me wish for more of her, especially since she is an original character in the movie and there’s plenty of chance to expand on her.

Ship-wise, I do like the scenario of them having mad tension that might get resolved, with both of them wrestling for control but not wanting to give in to the other.

Potential prompts:

How F’nale came to work for IOI, whether she was recruited by Nolan or approached him

Them plotting to take over the world find the Egg and at the same time trying to play against each other while knowing the other is a valuable ally

F’nale having aspirations to get rid of Nolan but still playing the part of the somewhat loyal henchwoman

3. HBO Rome (2005) - Octavia of the Julii, Gaius Julius Caesar Octavianus | Octavian | Emperor Augustus

Octavia and Octavian/Augustus were pretty much my favourite characters in the entire show, the Julii as a whole are so wonderfully messed up and I would love to read something centred on the siblings, although Atia, Caesar, and arguably Mark Antony, Livia, and Servilia can also be featured. Should you go for the platonic route, I’d still ask you to not ignore the canon events.

Potential prompts:

Post-canon where Octavia remains a close ally and adviser to Augustus

Outsider POV where someone else considers how close they are (and the rumours of them having once been lovers)

4. Succession (TV) - Kendall Roy, Shiv Roy

I do love the relationship between Ken and Shiv, and arguably what got me properly hooked to them was the scene between them in Season 2 where Shiv confronts her brother about why he stopped going after Logan. I won’t lie when I say that I also ship them very hard, especially with Shiv being the only one around whom Ken is openly vulnerable, and now in S3 him trying to get her on his team, but again, shippy dynamics need not necessarily be brought in if you’re uncomfortable with writing it.

If you chose to go for the ship: feel free to make it as messy, weird, and nasty as you like!

Potential prompts:

Backstory on them and their younger years! Roman can be included in that, along with Connor, Logan, and Caroline

As of now, this is AU-ish, but it might become canon: Shiv chooses to back up Kendall in his war against Logan and we get to see Team KendallSiobhan in all of its power duo glory.

[takatoshinishimura]

Swamps by Ryūnosuke Akutagawa

translated by Ryan Choi

Swamp I

On a rainy afternoon, at an art exhibition at the Academy Hall, I discovered a miniature oil painting in the corner of one of the rear galleries. To say that I discovered it is not an understatement—the painting was shoddily framed and hung out of sight in the worst possible light as if meant to be forgotten or shunned. It was called “The Swamp,” and its style was as unfamiliar to me as the artist’s name. Perhaps because the work was minute in size and the subject matter superficially clichéd with its imagery of floods, thickening mud, wild foliage and the like, I saw no one stop in front of it, much less even begin to appreciate what a remarkable achievement that it was: the artist, for one, used no green on the plants; the common reeds, poplars, and figs were a viscous yellow that was textured like wet wall plaster. At first, I couldn’t decide if the painting represented the artist’s perception as it was, or if it was a kind of caricature of it. I admired his nuances of line and shade, and became convinced that the painting could only have been done by someone with a visionary eye: it had frightening power, but one that revealed itself only by degrees. I was entranced by the foreground mud, the intricate yellows of the plants, feeling myself inside the scene, ankle deep in smooth dense mud, the sounds of my treading feet. In this modestly sized oil, the unknown artist demonstrated a command of nature on par with the canonical greats. Of all the paintings on display that rainy afternoon, some by the most celebrated masters of our time, none approached the eminence of “The Swamp.”

“You’re his number one fan,” a voice announced with sarcastic intimacy, and a hand clapped on my shoulder, shaking me from the sanctum of my thoughts. I turned toward the man, and recognized him as the art critic for one of the papers. I had spoken with him on a few occasions and had never cared for him.

“What’s so special about it?” the critic said, pointing at the swamp with the tip of his manicured beard. He wore on his spry body a brown suit cut to figure in a style that was ubiquitous at the time, and he conducted himself snobbishly, with the calculated grace of a man who believes in his infallibility. I addressed him with extreme reluctance.

“It’s a masterpiece,” I said.

“A masterpiece? It’s interesting, I’ll concede that.”

He erupted in laughter. I could see his belly punching the inside of his shirt. Some people glared at us, thinking that we were a pair, which magnified my antipathy.

“It’s a fascinating story, since it’s the only painting in the exhibition that’s not by a member of the Academy. The artist used to come in all the time and pester the office about showing his work. No one took him seriously of course, and then one day he stopped coming and everyone forgot about him until his family began showing up in his place with his paintings in tow, making the same request. And their persistence paid off, the Academy finally relented and accepted this one, whatever their motives, as long as the family didn’t mind it hanging back here.”

“Is the artist dead?”

“Dead when he was living.”

“What do you mean?” I said, more curious now than miffed.

“He went mad, haven’t you heard?”

“He was mad when he did this painting?”

“Obviously yes.” The volume of his voice had spiked.

“No sound mind paints colors this detached from reality. But we disagree. You say this painting is a masterpiece. For me that’s perplexing.”

He chuckled pompously. He seemed to think that I was ashamed of not knowing the backstory of the work, and more so he tried to exploit my ignorance by imposing his viewpoint on me. But his words were ineffectual. I was arrested with wonder again by the swamp, and my vision of the artist as a petulant man, tormented by anxieties and an exquisite eye for the light.

The critic rested his case, sharpening his look of self-belief, “The man went mad by attrition, from his inability to get the images from his head onto the canvas. Say what you like, but this is the nature of the work that you prize.”

His lame assessment was the artist’s only recompense from the establishment for a work that had cost his sanity. I peered further into the swamp, and had a feeling again of unsettling clarity, seeing there the turbid waters and skies, the common reeds, poplars, and figs textured like pulpy yellow mud, and as dynamic as nature itself.

I looked at the critic and repeated myself.

“It’s a masterpiece.”

April 1919

Ryūnosuke Akutagawa (1892-1927), born in Tokyo, Japan, was the author of more than 350 works of fiction and non-fiction. Japan’s premier literary award for emerging writers, the Akutagawa Prize, is named after him.

Ryan Choi lives in Honolulu, Hawaiʻi, where he was born and raised. His work appears in New England Review, Harper’s, BOMB, New York Tyrant, The Yale Review,and elsewhere.

https://tinhouse.com/swamps/

[you-did-well-my-love]

Drama Review: The K2

This is not Healer. This is not a fluffy romance; this is a political thriller with a romantic sideplot. If you go in expecting Healer 2.0, like I saw many people did, you will be disappointed.

Y’ALL IT’S BEEN SO LONG I FORGOT HOW I FORMAT MY DRAMA REVIEWS THIS IS SO BAD

Rating: 4/5

OST: I love it, it really did well setting the tone. Same Day is a jam. Yoona’s Amazing Grace is beautiful. And omg going back and checking the artist list after getting into Knowing Bros - HOLY SHIT MIN KYUNG HOON IS ON THE OST - Anyway, the music really suited the drama.

Genre: Melodrama

Synopsis:  Kim Je Ha is a former soldier for hire. He is also called K2. He is hired as a bodyguard by Choi Yoo Jin. Yoo Jin is the wife of a presidential candidate and the daughter of a chaebol family. Meanwhile, Ko An Na is the secret daughter of the presidential hopeful. She is also a recluse. (source: mydramalist)

Trigger Warning: Suicide

Thoughts/Review:

Disclaimer - I apologize for how scattered this review will be. 95% of this will be copied and pasted from the notes I took on my phone while watching.

To start, this was one of my most anticipated dramas of 2016. I honestly don’t think I followed a dramas filming and teaser releases as intensely as I did for The K2. However, the anticipation was entirely for Ji Chang Wook, I admittedly went in with low expectations because of Yoona.

I’ll quickly say that those low expectations were shamed right in the beginning and I was very impressed by Yoona’s acting. The role suited her well.

So right away the drama starts off pretty dark. Like the opening scene is a child praying, so you know shit is about to go down.

Said child then discovers their dead mother. You know that trope. The mother’s death is one of the central mysteries/conflicts in the drama.

I’m going to trust the notes in my phone because I honestly don’t remember the beginning at all, but I wrote: “Very strong start. They laid out everything for you, ‘these are our characters, this is the conflict,’ but still kept secrets for that air of mystery” why do i try to sound sophisticated

The first few episodes are set-up. They delve into the pasts of our leads and what made shaped their current personalities.

I was impressed with the PTSD; I think this is the first drama I’ve watched where someone had it. However, I didn’t like that his pain was all over a girl. They just suddenly threw her in without any foreshadowing. It would have been more flooring if he was distressed over losing his comrades.

Continuing on with the characters, I thought they were all fascinating. I couldn’t tell who was the bad guy and who was the good guy. I don’t think there were good guys (with the exception of Anna), everyone had some sort of darkness in them. They did a lot of “the enemy of my enemy is my friend” kind of stuff. Like at first I thought Yoo Jin was the bad guy, but I found myself kind of rooting for her. And Se Joon (Anna’s dad) was an ass, but he seemed protective of Anna.

The plot didn’t go the way I expected it to.

Like, Yoo Jin was so well-developed. Usually female antagonists are cold-stone bitches, but she was so emotional. It was a really nice change to see.

The dynamic between her and Je Ha was so FASCINATING. Like I still stand by my opinion that she was crazy, but it was so unique that it really compels you to keep watching.

Ji Chang Wook was great like always. He expresses emotions on his face so well it’s crazy! Plus he does this thing when he does kiss scenes where he gets really close to the girl’s face before he kisses her and it makes my heart flutter like crazy my gosh. I loved his vulnerability with Anna.

And like, there was this scene that I saw a thousand times before the drama aired because it was literally in EVERY teaser, but I still got chills when I saw it in the drama because it was just that good.

I really liked Anna’s character. She was so pure, but had so much pain. And I thought it was interesting how hard she tried to run and how desperate she was to see her dad. She was motivated to get her answers, and while her methods were a bit naive, it can be understood from the way she was raised. While some people did, I personally didn’t see her relationship with Je Ha as insta-love partly because she was so focused on her dad which I appreciated.

They were cute together. I wrote that about twelve times throughout my notes.

I feel like all of the actors were so good; they bounced off of each others’ energy really well and had phenomenal chemistry with each other.

And I loved the bond Je Ha formed with the other JSS guys, it was the cutest thing. I just about died when the guy got all giddy at Je Ha calling him “hyung” it was so adorable.

And that brilliant spin on the classic shower scene XD

I do have a couple of complaints:

I already mentioned one: Jeha’s past lover. The story was weak, and in my opinion kind of unbelievable. The way they introduced it randomly in episode 3 was just so ineffective.

The product placement was absolutely freaking ridiculous

My biggest pet peeve: sometimes it felt like Yoona was there because she was Yoona. Anna was such an interesting character, but they didn’t do much with her for the beginning of the drama. And like the entire plot was supposed to center around her, but they left her out so much. The writers spent too much time focusing on his revenge and the politics that Je Ha’s supposed “reason for living” was tossed to the side. This is really what killed some of the enjoyment for me, and why the drama isn’t rated a 5. There were plot things the writers could have and should have done differently

Also, I still don’t understand what was on the flash drive and what Kumar Gate was

However, I loved the cinematography. It was absolutely stunning. The wide-shots of the scenery were gorgeous, and old churches are my architectural weakness. I loved how Anna was almost always in a light colored dress or nightgown in the beginning; it gave her a very haunting and ghostly feel which was really symbolic for her character.

The action scenes were great, which was no surprised considering the lengths they went to to shoot them.

And lastly, I loved the ending. And what I mean by that is the structure. I LOVE how the final battle was stretched out over two episodes, and they didn’t try to squeeze everything into one. Not only was it such a relief, but it was really satisfying. 

Content too; the betrayal, manipulation, and revealing of answers were really well done.

If they did the entire drama the way they did the last episode, The K2 would probably have made my favorites list. 

~~~

I’m not gonna proof-read this before posting, oh dear lol

Finished 11/12/16