#the animators knew the gays wouldnt be ready

[inukouga]

you know who we really should’ve seen with their hair down? SESSHOMARUS MOM

[princeanxious]

So, Anxceit but make it a human au and a rivals to lovers speedrun, these are my notes, lets go:

Virgil and Janus have a past from their parents trying to pit them against eachother despite trying to be bestfriends when they were kids and it translated into Virgil growing Taller and eventually intimidating the fuck out of Janus and Janus just never backing down as their short genuine friendship as kids turned into a toxic rivalry very quickly.

They never get full on violent but it's a very close thing, where Virgil has had instances of pushing past Janus and pinning Janus to walls when he says something scathing that hits too close to home(because he Knows they both know Both of their weaknesses so well, and is convinced Virgil will use them against Janus and does it first to avoid being hurt first)

It all comes to a head when theyre in senior year and finally starting to come to terms that they both fucking hate their parents for what they did to them and dont want the future their parents want for them, and realizing theyre gay and knowing their parents wont accept that just tops it all off.

(continued under the cut)

Well, maybe Janus is coping with is worse than Virgil is, still having some internalized homophobia left thats directed at Janus himself even if hes trained the rest of it out of himself, bc Virgil has a network of friends and support now and Janus doesnt, bc he forcibly isolated himself, and lashes out at Virgil possibly being gay too(which mightve hit /him/ too close to home as just Another Thing to compete with Virgil with)

And Virgil, not immediately understanding the situation but for once theyre alone with no one to pull him away from Jan so he just pins him to a wall with a threat about being real sick of Jans shit, being gay isn't wrong and he sure as he'll isnt going to take shit from /Janus/ about it, of all people

And Janus is caught tongue tied bc its the exact moment he realizes he Really Loves Virgil for being stronger than him (physically and mentally through all the shit theyve both gone through) and never knew how to cope with it, and their adrenaline is high, and it's the exact moment Janus realizes he doesn't give a shit about what his Parents think anymore and does something he hopes his future self won't regret.

"Fuck it, I'm already a disappointment to them," Is all Janus says to himself, not giving Virgil enough time to process it before grabbing Virge's jacket and pulling him down into a kiss.

Cue extremely heated mutual making out because Virgil is just Done trying to parce anything out at the moment and finally doing what he'd wanted to do for /years/. Despite the jabs and mutual toxicity, Virgil was able to see through the outside in just how much worse Janus had it as they grew up, understood his lashing out as a trapped animal that was never going to know safety until he escaped, and they other reason they had turned on eachother was because of their parents mutual effort to pit them against one another. He may not have loved Janus in that exact moment, but he was damn well ready to.

Eventually Virgil moves down Janus's neck, and bites down hard enough to mark and suck a noticable bruise into Janus's neck, because they both know Janus's parents are going to flip about it, "That's for all the years you were a dick,"

And then he oh so gently cups Janus's lost face and presses a much softer much sweeter kiss to Janus's lips, "and thats for all the same years that /I/ was a dick right back."

And then they stand there, tucked up against eachother against the wall, clinging to eachother in a desprate attempt to keep the fragile peace.

"Our parents are fucking awful." Jan says

"I could've told you that, but yeah. Welcome to club a la shitty parents, population: us." Virgil agrees.

"..I'm sorry. For all of it."

"I know you are. We'll figure it out. In the mean time, your coming with me to Pat's house, no choice in the matter. Its a safe space and we're gonna use it to talk about our.. ugh, *feelings.*" Virgil fakes an exaggerated look of disgust, but it falls away to a softer, indecernable look.

"Gross. But I wouldnt dream of fighting you on that even if i could," Janus snarks, tucking his head against the others chest.

"..Yes you would." Virgil smirks, leaning his head on Janus's.

"..Yes, I would. But only because I seem to *love* riling you up." Janus agrees, feeling lighter than he ever had in his life.

Virgil was going to have trouble explaining exactly Why his childhood rival was tucked into his lap, dressed in his favorite hoodie, and not snarking and cursing him out to Virgil's friends; but nothing was gonna compare to the absolute chaos that erupted when Virgil and Janus had glanced at eachother somepoint later down the timeline and leaned in to kiss eachother as casually and naturally as if theyd already been doing it for months.

It was certainly going to be a very long afternoon, but. It was also the day everything changed for the better, and they wouldnt have had it any other way.

[otterplusharchive]

rey! do you have any recs for kdramas? i have never watched any, but i like lovable characters and romance ? thank you in advance!

I DO IN FACT HAVE DRAMA RECS HII not all of these will be kdramas, but ill start with the kdramas ive watched and enjoyed and ill include all the warnings for them that i can remember off the top of my head and a brief synopsis for u!

kdramas-

1. weight lifting fairy kim bok joo

this was probably one of the first kdramas i saw people post about in like 2015 and i watched a little bit of it in 2016 but then only just got around to finishing it last year. the basic gist of it is its about a young sports college weight lifter, kim bok joo, centering around her navigating through her life and trying to figure out who she is and what she wants in life and what she wants to be. her romantic interest in the show is a swimmer and they have a sort of rivals to friends to lovers, he is SO in love with her and its adorable. i absolutely loved the side characters in this show theyre all so fun and kim bok joos best friends and weight lifting team are especially delightful. my main warning would be that this show addresses eating disorders and theres a lot of mention of both weight gain and weight loss, theres also a plot point early on where kim bok joo has a crush on her eventual love interests older brother but it gets resolved and the older brother literally goes "i didnt realize you had a crush on me and if i knew that i wouldnt have been so friendly with you, it would be completely innapropriate for us to be in a relationship". overall its a really sweet and emotional fun show but if you have issues with weight talk id skip this one

2. tale of the nine tailed

this one is really recent from last year and i didnt expect to be so hooked by it but boy howdy did i get attached to all the characters and the wild plot. it feels hard to explain the plot but basically a nine tailed fox named lee yeon is living in modern day seoul and is working for the underworld finding paranormal spirits/creatures/other rogue foxes that are causing havoc on the world, hes resigned himself to living this life while waiting for his girlfriend who died tragically 600 years ago to come back to life because he traded his status as a mountain god in order to ensure that her soul would one day be reincarnated. a plucky investigative journalist named nam ji ah figures out that hes not human and shenanagins ensue because she looks exactly like his dead girlfriend oooooo whatll happen. the plot beyond that gets really wild and its hard to explain and is easier to just watch. if u enjoy paranormal adventures this one is good. my one big complaint and issue with this is that the immortal mountain spirit meets his original girlfriend when shes a child and she continues to visit him off and on as she grows up which is Hm I Dont Like That! but thankfully the present time romance our female lead meets him when shes about 30 if im remembering right. also warnings for general fantasy violence, references to child abuse, animal death, and abandonment issues

3. extraordinary you

HUGE unreality warning for this. if you have issues with feeling unreal or have paranoia/delusions about not being a real person id avoid this one just because of its premise

ok i know i said tale of the nine tailed was a hard plot to explain but BOY extraordinary you is even HARDER to explain. because its so wild but so good. its about a girl who realizes that she is literally a side character in a comic book, and the story becomes her trying to change the story to save her character from dying but it becomes a lot more than that. the romance in this is literally tooth achingly sweet and the show itself is very pretty, i loved the side characters in this one and the show was engaging and interesting to watch it became really layered and meta. super reccomend this one honestly. my main issues/warnings that i can remember off the top of my head were just one character being the classic controlling boyfriend stereotype, bullying someone specifically for being poor, unreality like i mentioned before, and then at the very end there was this love interest for a side character who got reincarnated from a past piece of writing that they had been in and put in the comic but she was a student and he was the school cook which is weird but thankfully they like barely interact at all and theres no real romance he just like recognizes her and its barely a thing at the end of the show but its still weird

4. mystic pop up bar

big warning for suicide, sexual harrasment (which is framed as being bad and the guy whos harrassing the girl literally gets thrown off a roof)

i havent finished this one yet and thats mainly because im not emotionally ready because this one makes me soooo emotional. if you like found family this is a good one. its about a pop up bar run by a woman whos been tasked with solving the problems of a certain amount of people in order to atone for her crimes in the past before dying, shes able to enter the dreams of people and solve their issues using the information she gets in the dreams. paranormal shenanagins ensue, she acquires a son and a husband and it kills me its so fun and quirky and fun despite handling dark themes and peoples problems. also very sweet the found family murders me

5. kingdom (netflix original)

i literally am not going to be able to watch any other zombie media because kingdom and train to busan are the best pieces of zombie media ive ever seen. warnings for gore and violence and just general horror aspects.

i absolutely love this one its so thrilling and well done, i love the acting and the way that this show looks its absolutely gorgeous. a zombie plague breaks out in joseon period korea where the emperor has died and then was brought back to life by the queen and her father in a ploy to try and keep their family in political power, the crown prince must find answers. a lot more happens and its very dramatic and good i love the characters in this one

cdramas

1. the untamed. if you follow me and you havent watched the untamed im begging you to watch the untamed. literally one of the most beautiful stories ive experienced in my life i am not joking when i say i cried multiple times over it. the main characters are canonically gay in love and have a son together please watch the untamed. handles a lot of dark themes, heres a tw guide

2. the sleuth of the ming dynasty

this is another one i havent finished but its fun so far, very gay, found family, food, and solving murder mysteries during the ming dynasty

3. hikaru no go (also known as qi hun)

havent finished this one, there is some propaganda about hong kong in the first episode but as far as i know thats the only instance of something like that in the show

this ones about the game go and so far its very sweet and fun, local boy awakens a ghost who was a master of the game of go hundreds of years ago and eventually is persuaded to learn how to play go with the aid of the ghost. im really liking this one so far its very cute and i love the characters in it. if youve watched the untamed nie huaisangs actor ji li is in this one!

4. the legend of yunqian

this ones very short and on youtube, all the episodes are about 5 minutes long and its a lesbian time travel fantasy adventure with a happy ending! funny and cute

jdramas

1. cherry magic

please please please watch cherry magic. the premise sounds very much like a weird yaoi kind of thing but trust me on this. trust me. it is so heart warming and sweet and i was so emotional about it and the growth of the main character.

adachi gains the power to read peoples minds on his 30th birthday based off a urban legend that if youre a 30 year old virgin that youll become a wizard. after gaining this power he accidentally finds out that his extremely popular and handsome coworker has a crush on him, and shenanagins ensue along with adachi having blossoming feelings in return. this show was really refreshing in a lot of ways, adachi is a main character who like.. is unsure of himself and insecure in a very kind of realistic way, he closes himself off and is afraid to reach out to people and through the course of the show we see him slowly come out of his shell and realize that hes likeable and lovable and that people want to be around him and its so nice to see. my main complaint about this show is that i dont really like the background couple, but otherwise this is a very sweet and refreshing gay romance that has a happy ending!

some others that i myself havent seen but that ive seen people talk about a lot and that i want to watch eventually:

- the legend of fei (cdrama)

- the wolf (cdrama)

- gaurdian (cdrama, not the kdrama one called goblin)

- healer (kdrama, i did watch some of this one but it was in 2016 and i never finished it so i barely remember any of it but i do remember liking it)

- nobody knows (kdrama)

- its ok to not be ok (kdrama)

sorry this is so long but i hope youll be able to find a drama u enjoy!!

[taxevader42069]

i’m not sure i will ever get over pegoryu. like, to me at least, it’s kind of obvious ryuji was meant to have a romance route, at least in the early stages of writing. like yosuke, the way his relationship builds with the main character is heavily implied to have something else to it. the only difference is that with ryuji, we have nothing. no scrapped confession lines, no solid proof that he was meant to be a dateable character in the game. but even just in tropes, they fit under a ton of japanese romance stereotypes. there’s a point in the anime where ryuji is handing sae’s treasure to akira, but for just a few moments, their hands linger on each other’s. ryuji knows the plan is to get arrested and have akiren fake his death, but he’s stated in the game that he was worried akira wouldn’t make it. i think the scene was meant to demonstrate that ryuji believed in akiren despite his rational fears, but they already did that with his mannerisms. he said he knew their leader would make it, but sounded unsure. he wasn’t ready to say goodbye in any way but he pretended to have confidence so their plan would work, but even so, the animation adds this detail without prompting. i understand that this is a strange detail to linger on for this long, but i’ve always thought of this scene when i think of pegoryu. if you ask me, this probably isnt the best point to say “ryuji would confess here!” because he absolutely wouldnt. he wants their leader to be able to focus, he wants him to be safe more than anything. what i do think, though, is that this is a huge turning point for ryuji’s thoughts. everything leading up to that hand hold was more likely a buildup towards ryuji accepting his feelings himself. again, like yosuke, ryuji delivers a few lines implying that he’s weirded out by gay men, or that he wouldn’t really even consider a relationship with a guy, so it would obviously be a while before this himbo of a man accepts his own feelings. but upon understanding what he felt, i don’t think he felt trapped or upset. i think he would promise himself that as soon as akiren got out alive, he would confess to him.

now, the moment akira comes back to leblanc, you’ll notice that everyone is waiting for him. however, the first person to run up to their leader is ryuji. not only does he become the first person to approach akira, he gives him a big ol hug while he’s there. he says that he missed him, and he seems extremely relieved/ happy to see akira again altogether. this can easily be read as platonic, although it’s extremely doubtful ryuji would walk up to just whoever and give them a hug in the same manner he did akira. you never see him do this with anyone else in the game, he is ONLY this touchy with akira, and that’s highlited a few times. the game makes it very clear that only one person gets this treatment. this touchiness isnt just for one scene though, there are clear times where ryuji approaches akira unprompted, as if he just wants to be with him. the infamous bath house scene where ryuji leans on akira, to which akira says “don’t touch me,” (very flustered, might i add) and the treasure chest opening animation, where he keeps his hand on akita’s shoulder supportively the whole time, even giving him a little pat on the back.

speaking of being extremely touchy,, the valentine’s day short that nobody talks about. i know i just wrote a novel on how touchy ryuji is in the game, but this is a whole different BREED of touchy. there are points in this animation where ryuji smiles and holds akira’s hand, refers to akiren as “my renren!” and most importantly kisses akira. now, in all fairness? this short was really vague with what exactly happened. you ask ryuji if you’re his valentine, to which he provides an extremely clear “yes, yes of course,” before pausing and providing a much less confident “NOT!” you converse wirh ryuji for a while, and then it cuts to the attic. you can only see silhouettes of ryuji and akira through the window at this point, but they’re very clearly holding onto each other. their faces both lean towards each other, then the short is over. that’s it, that’s all the clarification we get. i’ve seen a lot of people argue that this was a hug, and usually i could agree. with a company like atlus, it’s a lot more likely that’s all it was. the one thing that leads me to believe otherwise is the fact that they didn’t let us see. if it was a hug, there’s nothing to censor, right? if they keep a kiss subtle, or if they’re able to make it subliminal, less people get pissed, everyone’s happy. EVERYONE EXCEPT ME BECAUSE THIS WAS BULLSHIT LET THEM KISS!!!!

regardless, touching back on the point where ryuji realizes his own feelings, there’s a scene during shido’s palace arc where ryuji calls the mc after everyone leaves his place. this is another scene everyone and their grandma has talked about, but i feel like i cannot drive this point home enough: this is the point where ryuji would have confessed if he hadn’t gotten too scared. he starts to say something, but he brushes it off with a “forget it,” and it’s never touched on again. am i going to say ryuji knew he would sacrifice himself if it came down to it and he wanted akiren to know in case that had to happen? yeah that’s. exactly what i’m going to say. in the end, i think his fear of ruining things outweighed his bravery, and so he hung up.

one of the BIGGEST points in the game that just drives home the idea that they’re romantically involved is at the very beginning. during the first palace ever, when akiren awakens to his persona, he does it to save ryuji. this might not seem like much, but considering the fact that most everyone else has an extreme driving reason to awaken to their persona, and akira’s is this kid he just met, i think that says a lot. DARE I SAY, they are literally soulmates. not only that, though, because akira is also partially responsible for ryuji’s awakening. i would argue it was ryuji’s anger at kamoshida for taking away the track team, or the fact that ryuji himself was about to be killed, but i believe that if that were the case, ryuji would have awoken to his persona at the same time akira did. there were extremely similar circumstances, and the opportunity was definitely there. but instead, it’s only when akira is on the ground and encourages him not to lose hope that he gets pissed enough to get his persona. they are each other’s reason to not let hope die. that’s it that’s the post

[yukiobeyme]

can i plssss get some trans man mc who's proudly feminine headcanons with the boys? like to where you wouldnt even think they were trans but they're comfortable with their presentation, you feel? (maybe some trans Levi and mammon maybe not who knows i dunno-)

I will admit this was a little bit of a challenge, but I wanted to take a shot at it. I looked up for reference and I relate a little because I still like feminine things, but I think I turn away from them because I find it harder to pass. So with a mix of research and some of my feelings I made these hc. Thank you for asking for these, because I tended to do an insecure occasionally secure masculine trans man, so yes let's do a trans man who is confident and doesn’t mind if he is feminine cause he still valid af. Article I looked at is

 Please let me know if any of these come off inaccurate, not LGBT friendly or can be perceived as offensive because that isn’t my goal. I’m totally open to having this conversation in the comments or privately. 

 Trans man mc who's proudly feminine

You are a transman

But you didn’t strive for masculinity

You adore being feminine

You sometimes bind but you were fine and comfortable with your chest

You didn’t feel the need to confide to people’s idea of what a man should look like

It was based on the culture of toxic masculinity anyways saying a man should be a ‘manly’ man all the freaking time. It was tiring.

You didn’t mind too much when people used the wrong pronouns, you gently corrected when you bothered but you were a man and you knew it, so it didn’t matter what others think

Lucifer:

Does have a puzzling and curious look

But completely accepts you for who you are

Asks question, being cautious to not overstep any boundaries

It was cute but also a little frustrating, but you knew he was just trying to be respectful

You finally told him that gender expression comes in a lot of different ways

Which he agreed to and then followed up with how you do it, how comfortable you were

You told him it took a few years and maybe occasionally on Earth it was hard because people are rude when they don’t understand. Like why not just be a lesbian, sometimes when you are frustrated or had enough you can get by as a gay trans man. But you came to terms with it and realized it didn’t matter what others thought. You were you and those who matter wouldn’t mind and those that mind didn’t matter

He totally gave you a small smile at that, he was really happy you felt that way and was just comfortable in your skin

He felt more comfortable to give you the occasional compliment

You would totally try and see if he wanted to test out a more feminine style simply because when he was stressed, he come and watch you do your makeup occasionally. He said your movements were really strong and confident it was relaxing.

Would never let you do it though. Except maybe one he asked about eye liner (Honestly I just want Lucifer in eyeliner tbh)

 Mammon:

Asked the most question, some borderline offensive and insensitive

But you knew it because he cared and wanted to understand

In Devildom gender wasn’t a big deal here

But Mammon knew Earth and it customizes so he was just genuinely curious

Especially how men where perceived or should act

But most of these came from a place of him being trans and did get how you could do it sometimes

Because Mammon was a model and was always desperate to ensure he passed and always looked like a manly man

Mammon couldn’t truly relate but he offered modeling experiences that he thought kinda relate

Which maybe they did maybe they didn’t

But you enjoyed spending time with him and learning more about him

He would totally shyly ask you to do his makeup, especially if you wanted to practice

Either practice a new technique, product, or look

Totally enjoys it even if he denies it

But he liked to spend time with you and he actually enjoyed some of the looks you created

He ends up asking you for eyeliner and mascara recommendations

Mammon still asked questions and liked having discussions with you

And pushes his own thoughts, feelings, and opinions

Allows himself to embrace a little more of his feminine side

But usually with a lot of encouragement from you

His was on edge when he first wore a makeup look out

It was natural but it would be noticeable to his brothers

Expecting to be teasing but only Asmodeus commented on it

Saying it looked lovely and brought out his eyes

Which after you went back behind clothes doors

Mammon would be on that high for a long time

Enjoyed to indulge himself more often

Even went as far as getting a modeling gig that allowed him to be more feminine

It was his favorite gig he had ever done and he said you being there made it that much better.

Leviathan:

Wasn’t able to contain his surprise

But was quickly stumbled through an apologize

Because he didn’t mind

If he doesn’t have anime or manga with Femme Trans Men/ didn’t already know of any, he did his research and found some for y’all to bond over

And he used it for some education purposes, but asked you if it was accurate or not

He would eventually ask of the problems you face

He would eventually come around and said he has played with this idea he could possibly non-binary, but he tended to see himself as more transmasculine/ trans man but just wasn’t sure. He just knew he hated the idea of just checking a box for his gender

He disclosed how he was he was envious of how confident you were in feminine things

You totally dragged him on a shopping trip

You bought him stuff he liked and kept it in your room so he wouldn’t feel insecure if his brothers say it.

You ended up getting him a flower crown (I’m so sorry I couldn’t resist)

But you hang out a lot more and bonded with each other over anime, manga and even makeup

Levi won’t let you do his makeup, but he enjoys watching you

He says it’s really calming

You helped him push his boundaries

And telling him it doesn’t make him less of a man by enjoying feminine things

He would tell you, you helped him a lot with confirming his identity but you would refuse to take credit

Saying all you did was encourage him and create a place where he faced no judgment.

 Satan:

You casually mentioned it to him while he was reading

He simply hummed in response

Until it seemed to register with him

He was really sweet but casually with it

He asked how much people’s opinions impacted you

You told him it might get to you sometimes but you were confident enough in your identity and appearance that at the end of the day it doesn’t matter

He ends going to one of his many stacks of books and pulled out a book before sitting down beside you

He tells you it from the Celestial Realm, but it contained information about Devildom

He flipped to a certain page and read it to you

That angels didn’t have genders and only adopted a gender when they presented themselves to humans

And then he was up again finding another people

About gender identity and expression

And how there are cultures that have similar ideas

It was really sweet honestly

He said he just wanted to make sure you felt valid and while he didn’t understand what it was like, he understood the concept and completely accepted it

Whenever there was an event that required dressed up

You would do your makeup in his bathroom

He would read to you

Totally gifted you makeup look books as well as magazines that had feminine male in them

Just small things that show he thinks about you.

Asmodeus:

Probably the most understanding

He loved embracing his feminine side, so he had a better idea than most of the brothers

Says he desperate needs more shopping trips with you

Does your makeup or asks you all the time to do it

He honestly just loves and adores it

Completely hypes you up all the time

Wants (he says it’s a need) fashion shows

But you also help him embrace a more feminine style as well

He would tell you about how he always wanted to try dresses, skirts, things that always seemed forbidden to him

While he might not wear it in public, whenever you were behind closed doors, he would occasionally wear one and do fashion shows for you

Then it was your turn to hype him up because you found out he was actually really insecure

 Beelzebub:

Beelz never questioned it,

Was your hype man

Thoroughly enjoyed watching you get ready

And seeing your style

Would totally buy you things once in a while

He stuck more towards jewelry instead of clothes

But they were still cute pieces and kind thoughts

You would incorporate every piece into your next day outfit

Beelz reaction was totally work it

You would talk about it sometimes

He would hype you up or comfort you if needed

But a lot of times you were okay, you knew when you looked good and you identify was valid regardless of what others think

Would occasionally ask questions but nothing to extreme

Definitely made sure you felt love and valid at all times

 Belphegor:

It was during lazy cuddling

Like he knew your name and how you presented yourself

But never gave it much thought

His eyes widen in surprise but went back to be somewhat shut

He told you it was all fine, all good

He made sure you felt valid and loved from his reaction

But in the moment, it didn’t go beyond that

Also lets you do makeup

Actually, you were dared to do his makeup while he was asleep

And you took the challenge

When he woke up he was annoyed at first

But later he told you, he actually liked how he looked

Eyeliner/smokey eye became a thing for him

You would talk a lot of what you thought/felt/ and your experiences

He just wanted to get to know you more and this seemed like to be an easy way to do so

[pwnyta]

ARE YA READY KIDS?!

Time for all my (non All Might) BNHA doodles. Lots of everything lots of sketchy lots of... Tokoyami...

UNDER THE CUT vvvv

Lets start off weak so when you see something better you can be like ‘wow what an improvement!!!‘

OjIida!!!

Dont listen to Iida when he says he can handle the scary movies. HES LYING.

But maybe Ojiro been knew and just wanted to cuddle?

Never lose track of your excitable boyfriend ever again!!!!

Ojiro cant lift his boyfriend but at least hes good to rest on.

He lost his game Iida! You animal.

The girls recognize Iida as best boy so he gets to come to their girls only hang outs. Hagakure is naked. Dont tell him that tho.

Iida tries to be a proper boy but when he sits properly his engines dig into his legs. His bfs are pretty ok with it tho.

Sleepy bfs after prom (or w/e the movie is doing)

Iida: This is the first one I caught!! IDK hes just so cute! And such a strange color for a Tangela!!!

Todo: .... He caught you.

Iida: This is my second Pokemon! He seems kind of cold but he’ll warm to you after a while!!!

Todo: YOU!!!! YOU SHOULD TEACH IT FIRE PUNCH AND ICE PUNCH!!! Iida: Thats a great Idea!

Iida: And this is my last one so far!!! Shes a special color too!!! Ocha: IIIIDDDAAAAA IS THAT ME?!!?!?

Iida: What’d you guys get!?

Now Iidas favs will find Poke-Iida... but where to start?!

Todoroki is rewarded for his bad manners....

Now for Tokoyami!!!!

Look either Kuroiro dresses in all black and looks like a full shadow all the time or he wears obnoxious colors to really stand out. I will believe nothing else.

Kuro, Toko and Dark Shadow band together to create a monster!!!!

Toko: Like this? Kuro: Yes perfect... now lets go freak everyone out! Shadow: YESSSSS!!!!!

Foiled again!!!

Aoyama and Tokoyami would be the worlds most extra relationship. Let these dramatic idiots be together. Id imagine them all grown up like Gomez and Morticia Adams... tell me you cant see that.

....I think I was trying to make a comic where Monoma is bein a dick but instead of being hilarious he hits a little too close and a little too hard... and actually hurts Tokoyamis feelings. 1-A doesnt fuck around if someones fucking with one of their own.

ShoTokoKou!!!

Toko has a hard time sleepin... even with his two big bfs.

Mineta, Kaminari and Sero: ehehehehe Shouji: ????? !!!!

Kaminari: EHEHE YA HAVE A NICE SLEEP!? YOU GUYS LOOK SUPER COZ------

Shouji: Do you have a problem with the way I choose to sleep with my boyfriends? Sero: CHOOSE?! Kami: IF WE KNEW IT WAS ON PURPOSE WE WOULDNT HAVE SAID ANYTHING!!! Mineta: ITS NOT FUNNY IF ITS ON PURPOSE!!!

Toko: ....??? What the hell is happening... Shouji: They woke you, huh....

3 fools who didnt really mean any real harm: ;;;;;----;;;;; SHOOOUUUJIIIIIII

Sato and Ojiro know better.

Iida, as always, is doin his best.

THE BEEF LIKES THE POULTRY.

Soft beaky boys.

Tokos the smallest of the spoopy kids... even adding Class Bs Kuroiro, Kamakiri, and Yanagi! Even adding Shinso!!!

Sometimes Toko is dramatic angsty... sometimes hes ‘I literally almost killed a bunch of my friends‘ angsty.

Tap your beaks together monster boys!!!!

I was makin a bunch of bird phrases/sayings/words and makin them ships... but I got lazy. Shoujis was ‘A bird in the hand‘ but I didnt like the way it was turning out so w/e. I like OchaTokos the best!

Small boys are awkward and have feelings at each other. More news at 11.

Ya know the eagle face meme... where Eagles only look cool from the side and look really sad and confused facing forward? LOL

Small boys cuddle.

Some TokOjiro... Ojiros pants hole reveals some Woodstock undies!!!

Sometimes Dark Shadow is clingy and jealous!!!!!

SPOOPY BOYS!!!!

SO SUPPORTIVE!!!!!

Mirio and Tamaki play together by a pond and Tamaki turns into whatever Mirio thinks is cool!

A SKETCHY COMIC I DIDNT HAVE THE PATIENCE TO FINISH!!!

M: Are you nervous!? T: Mirio... should we do this... M: Y-yes!! T:... You dont sound so sure...

M: .... I’ll talk to him first...

NE: Mirio.... tell me whats wrong... why are you upset? Who hurt you. Are you in trouble? M: /////sweating nervously NE: MIRIO!!! TELL ME.

M: I CAME HERE TO COME CLEAN ABOUT MY RELATIONSHIP WITH MY BOYFRIEND TAMAKI!!! I INTRODUCED HIM AS A FRIEND BEFORE BUT AFTER EVERYTHING THAT HAPPENED I WANT TO BE HONEST AND ALSO I LOVE HIM AND WANT TO MARRY HIM SO THERE!!! T: !!!!!!!!!!!!!! //facepalm x2

NE: .......... M: J-just be nice to him please.....

M: SIR PLEASE JUST GIVE ME A MOMENT.... Tamaki....

NE: >:\

M: Im sorry Tamaki... it just... all came out at once....  We can come back again later ok? We dont have to do it today... T: ...No I can do it...

M: Tamaki... T: For you! .... For you I can do it...

M: Really we can just come back later when hes had time to think about it... T: ...It means a lot to you so I--

NE: !!!!! M: SIR?! NE: Its sweet of you to face your fears for Mirio....

//Overly protective but supportive dad Nighteye.

KIRISHIDO!!!

Momos disguise was too cute on her!!!!

Everyone is a little bit gay for Momo.

Only respectable folks get to tell Momo how beautiful she is.

GlamRock wedding!!! Papa Jirou is crying while playing ‘ While My Guitar Gently Weeps‘ and mama Jirou rubs his back and tries to help him hide his tears so he looks cool in front of the guests.

Tsuyu didnt let anyone else have a chance at the bouquet! ITS HERS! AND SHES GONNA MARRY OCHAKO WITH IT!!! NO ONES GONNA STOP HER!

ANIMAL CROSSING!!! Its hard to make the frogs look.... not freaky...

I forgot these too~~~

Some DekAoyama.... I think someone requested Deku and Aoyama dancing at some point and I never fuckin finished it OH WELL

[littlelovelymemes]

✰  —  —  *  MORE POPULAR TEXT POST STARTERS

‘  when i figure out how to die without hurting my mom’s feelings it’s over for me, bitches  ’ ‘  420 stands for “4got 2 0pologize”  ’ ‘  all millennials do is commit minor felonies and be gay  ’ ‘  hoodies are one of the most powerful and underappreciated articles of clothing. cold? put on a hoodie. raining? put on a hoodie. no bra? put on a hoodie. nothing to wear? hoodie. cripplingly low self esteem? you already know. so versatile! so multifaceted!  ’ ‘  i thought christmas was like… next friday or something its in like 3 days fuck  ’ ‘  if you’re not in love with me by 00:00:00 jan 1 then just block me. i don’t need that kind of energy following me into the new year  ’ ‘  who needs ghosts? haunt your own house. wander around your own living room wailing and crying  ’ ‘  my kink is not opening messages and pretending theyre not there  ’ ‘  u know when ur growing out of phases and mindsets but u haven’t found where exactly ur shift in identity is going yet? that’s tonight’s mood  ’ ‘  me @ me: don’t start buddy don’t you dare  ’ ‘  there are people you haven’t met yet who will love you  ’ ‘  god knew what she was doing when she made bruno mars short if he had been tall he would be too powerful  ’ ‘  motivation? haven’t heard of her in years how she doin  ’ ‘  Do you think people with LED headlights know that everyone hates them? Like…really hates them in an oddly personal way? Do you think they know?  ’ ‘  and the final mood for 2017 is: you know those days where you’re like, this might as well happen?  ’ ‘  putting more importance into self care, spirituality, love and peace of mind. start with stretching and deep breathing.  ’ ‘  dont forget to tell someone you love that you love them, thank people who deserve to be thanked, be more patient on people having a hard time, be more considerate, understanding, and be kinder, always.  ’ ‘  do you think in the 1700s there were people who were like nah man Mozart’s a total sellout I only listen to peasants beating things with sticks it’s way more authentic  ’ ‘  2032 is gonna be my year just u wait  ’ ‘  I want a “I made a playlist for you” typa love  ’ ‘  @ 2018 the bar is literally so low  ’ ‘  Just because you don’t look like somebody who you think is attractive doesn’t mean you aren’t attractive. Flowers are pretty, but so are sunsets and they look nothing alike.  ’ ‘  i have a “why am i like this” moment at least five times a day  ’ ‘  very sad to hear about donald trump. nothing happened to him i’m just sad to hear about him  ’ ‘  *me, eyes wide open at 3am* what happened to chandler bing once he got to yemen  ’ ‘  tonight’s mood is the deep desire to be held close in a dimly lit room, covered in blankets while rain is softly falling outside  ’ ‘  do ya ever bring your pet up to a mirror and ur like “that you”  ’ ‘  i guess im just too fucking dumb to lucid dream. cant ever realize im in a dream, i’ll look around me like damn i’m in my old elementary school and my teeth are falling out and im naked? well shit guess this is my life now. got fooled by my subconscious again lads  ’ ‘  u ever get no sleep and the next day ur body functions like the tumblr app  ’ ‘  you ever wonder how many people you’re in the “we’re friends but i would kiss you if you asked” club with  ’ ‘  is anyone else just going through life like “yeah i just gotta get past this last difficult week and then it’s smooth sailing from there!” but like… every week  ’ ‘  The only thing toxic that you should still be in contact with is that song Britney Spears made, because that song is lit.  ’ ‘  imagine if you named your kid dad. just dad.  ’ ‘  take care of yourself, please. i don’t know what id do if anything happened to you.  ’ ‘ crazy how personal growth can make you let go of people you swore you couldn’t live without.  ’ ‘  im in no position to have high standards but it doesn’t stop me  ’ ‘  you can start over at anytime. your day is not ruined. your world is not over. take a deep breath. start over.  ’ ‘  I’m gonna have a bomb ass life and I know it cause I’ve suffered so much and I know that wasn’t for no reason  ’ ‘  you ever just get in bed and ur like yep this is where i’m meant to be  ’ ‘  an unstoppable force (my love of books) meets an unmovable object (my lack of a desire to actually read anything)  ’ ‘  i just have this persistent feeling of “i’m not doing enough” combined with “i don’t have the energy to do anything” and it just really fucking sucks  ’ ‘  sorry I haven’t replied to ur texts I’ve been overwhelmed by literally anything that’s ever happened or will happen  ’ ‘  me when i see a wild animal in a metropolitan area: reclaim your space, we are the invaders, retake what is yours  ’ ‘  no offense but money would solve literally every single one of my problems. like all of them. i dont have a single problem that money wouldnt immediately solve  ’ ‘  i am not enough and it’s eating me alive  ’ ‘  what do u mean “what have i been up to” … i’m out here ruining my own life as always bitch  ’ ‘  always remember that love will always come back to u. in a different form, different person, different hobby, different touch. but in any way, love will always come back.  ’ ‘  The struggle between me wanting to be successful and me wanting to lay in bed 24/7  ’ ‘  If you play “Feeling Myself” by Nicki Minaj and Beyoncé at exactly 11:58:50 pm on New Year’s Eve, Beyoncé will say “World Stop” in 2017 and “Carry On” in 2018.  ’ ‘  Self care is putting absurd amounts of parmesan cheese on your pasta  ’ ‘  you ever just like “wow that’s my voice? people listen to this clown on a daily basis?”  ’ ‘  ravioli ravioli give me a reason to live  ’ ‘  finally worked up the courage to tell the starbucks girl she was beautiful and i only puked twice  ’ ‘  do i wanna know??? no. but thank u monkey friends  ’ ‘  hey this is kinda ns.fw but i wann h*ld your h*nd  ’ ‘  talent: overthinking  ’ ‘  have you ever had that feeling that you really wanna workout to get a flat stomach… but you also just wanna eat pizza and watch netflix.  ’ ‘  if you google eyebrows are you eyebrowsing  ’ ‘  *skips tutorial* how the fuck do you play this game  ’ ‘  Literally heard a convo at the library where a guy was telling a girl that he’s an omega and the girl telling him that she’s a beta, and my mind just did not automatically connect the context to fraternity pledge classes at all and I just whispered to myself “what the fuck?? What the fuck??”  ’ ‘  my hands? ready to be held  ’ ‘  Catch These Hands! with your hands. we’re holding hands now. this is nice  ’ ‘  kinda weird that u can think about someone as much as u want and they have no idea  ’ ‘  physically, yes, i could fight a bird. but emotionally? imagine the toll  ’ ‘  I would rather wander around a store for 9 hours than ask an employee where something is and this I do not understand  ’ ‘  my childhood, or, as i like to call it, the general abyss with one or two memories attached to it   ’ ‘  i know ‘gay’ isn’t an emotion but let’s be real,,,,,,,,,it kind of is and i feel it 24/7  ’ ‘  babe get ready for a night on the town, i just found an old Subway gift card and there’s still $9.45 left on it  ’ ‘  just because the past didn’t turn out like you wanted it to, doesn’t mean your future can’t be better than you ever imagined  ’ ‘  i’m the person who’s 100% down for spontaneous adventures but also 100% down to lay in bed all day. i’m on both ends of the spectrum  ’ ‘  this year has changed me more than I ever thought it would.   ’ ‘  it’s ok to disappear for a lil while and get your shit together.  ’ ‘  if you wanna love me hmu  ’ ‘  calling me baby makes me so freakin weak  ’ ‘  i’m that one guy on spongebob always screaming about his leg  ’ ‘  remember to drink a fucking shit ton of water every miserable day of ur life  ’ ‘  i just want someone who’s excited to make out with me and text me all the time.  ’ ‘  never apologize for your giant dogs getting overexcited, if i get taken down by a 100 pound mass of fluff then that’s how i go.  ’ ‘  when i figure out how to die without hurting my mom’s feelings it’s over for me, bitches  ’ ‘  THIS GUY JUST ASKED ME WHAT MY NAME WAS AND I DIDNT UNDERSTAND WHAT HE SAID SO I SAID 4:45  ’ ‘  my blood is glow stick juice. thats why all my bones crack when i move.  ’ ‘  are cute dates and rough sex too much to ask for  ’ ‘  honestly, my goal in life is just to be a very warm person. i want to be as loving and as kind as i can be.  ’ ‘  just a small dumb bitch…. living in a lonely ditch  ’ ‘  you’re not selfish for wanting to be treated well  ’ ‘  when y'all fake conversations in your heads do you sometimes say random sentences out loud too? i was just tying my shoes and said very sternly and loudly “i DO know how ants work, fucker”  ’ ‘  true space facts: if u look up there it is  ’ ‘  anyone else bummed they have 2 sleep alone tonight and uh not in some1s arms  ’ ‘  how am i sensitive and a bitch at the same time  ’

[piggiechi]

i was having an episode that day, but regardless that was still very off and inconsiderate of me to say though now im thinkin back like.. I wonder whats so bad about drifting apart that she got so mad about it. Like even my antisocial ass doesnt get so bothered by it anymore. and i used to to absolutely BATSHIT when i thought i was losing my friends.

but my friend has like 1000 other friends and is super outgoing, so it confused me a lot ? if i was like her i wouldnt give a shit, bc she could always make more friends! People come and go, its normal. its reassuring too, imo

For me, most of my irl friendships are a result of circumstance, ie my friends felt bad for me because i had no friends, so they approached me and befriended me. so I have nothing in common with them and i cant be completely honest about my life with them either. Most particularly, i dont tell them about my sexuality, my school life, my interests, and my mental illness. its hard to connect with someone who you feel almost has a fake concept of who u are.. And especially about my sexuality and interests. i feel like our friendship wouldnt be the same if she knew those things about me. simply bc we are really different.

like...Im gay, closeted, and grew up pretending that anime characters were my friends. Shes straight and grew up with lots of real friends. its that sort of thing. its not that shes a bigot who would destroy me if i told her this stuff or anything, its just that i feel like itd change things too much.

i mean i value my friends' company and all. like we obviously care for each other on some level after being friends for 5 years. but it still trips me out why she got so mad that one time.

BUT I guess i dont understand, because in general i dont have the mental capacity to handle genuine relationships atm? honestly, my friendship with them is not how i imagine the ideal friendship to be. i get dependent on them easily and project on them a lot, and its not fair to them. So i need to get over my personal issues and my relationship with myself first

so ya... i guess thats why ive never had big problems with online friends? like its impossible for me to use them as a crutch. eg only taking classes bc theyre taking them. And also i can distance myself whenever i feel like im gonna go nuts. Irl thats very hard, especially in face to face conversations..

Once im ready and healthy, i hope i can talk to lots of people normally. even if i cant form super close relationships, i just wanna be comfortable having nice conversations with all types of people. I dont wanna be a toxic person to anyone either.

I dont think ill be talking to these same people next year. but i wanna be a more honest and better friend to whoever i meet next in my life.

[andystanberg]

~ still not gay ~

Word Count: 2 800

Genre: chat fic, coming out, coming to terms with sexuality, humour

Pairing(s): phan, tiny mention of kickthestickz

Warnings: swearing, so many spelling/grammar mistakes (all on purpose as it’s a chat fic), mentioned homophobia, sexual humour (not a lot)

Summary:

crabstickzzz has added PJ to the chat. PJ: what? dannyboy: chris and co. think im gay

A/N Shout out to the (formerly) ~ still not gay ~ chat, thanks for not believing I was straight. (Loosely based off my own unconventional coming out.)

AUGUST 12TH

dan is gay

crabstickzzz has added PJ to the chat.

PJ: what?

dannyboy: chris and co. think im gay

PJ: you are.

crabstickzzz: SUCK IT HOWELL

LouiseP: Chris, Dan clearly isn’t ready for blowjobs yet.

dannyboy: IM NOT GAY

PJ: sure.

crabstickzzz: wat about ur crush on phil

AmazingPhil: His what now

dannyboy: i dont have a crush on phil

PJ: sure.

dannyboy: im straight guys cmon

PJ has changed the chat name to dan is in denial and gay.

dannyboy: oh for fucks sake

dannyboy: seriously guys im 100% sure im straight

PJ: sure.

-

AUGUST 15TH

dan is in denial and gay

AmazingPhil: Why is the name always about Dan

LouiseP: This group chat is dedicated to whether or not Dan is gay. And memes.

crabstickzzz: thats all we talk about so theres no point in creating another

PJ: i’ve been in this group chat for two days and it’s true.

dannyboy: why does it matter what i am

crabstickzzz: bc u wont admit ur gay! we r teaching u to love and accept urself 4 who u r!!!

dannyboy: bullshit

AmazingPhil: Maybe we should lay off Dan a bit

dannyboy: thank you filip

AmazingPhil: Never mind please continue

dannyboy changed the chat name to i hate you all

-

Private chat between dannyboy and AmazingPhil.

AmazingPhil: You’re not mad, are you?

dannyboy: no

AmazingPhil: Sure?

dannyboy: its fine. theyre joking and having fun. i just dont get why they care so much about my sexuality though

AmazingPhil: Maybe Crabstickzzz and PJ have a crush on you and Louise is trying to wingman both???

dannyboy: yeah right. can you imagine?

AmazingPhil: You never know

dannyboy: for starters, nobody has, or ever had, or ever will have a crush on me, and secondly, crabstickzzz and pj are dating

AmazingPhil: WHAT? WHEN? HOW?

dannyboy: well i dont know for sure but cmon

AmazingPhil: Oh good. I thought I had missed their big reveal

AmazingPhil: Also don’t be so sure about the crush thing

dannyboy: what? who has a crush on me?!

dannyboy: PHIL LESTER ANSWER ME

-

NOVEMBER 20TH

i hate you all

dannyboy: GUYS OH MY GOD DID YOU SEE THE PIC ZAC EFRON JUST POSTED

LouiseP: Who’s Zack?

PJ: oh boy.

dannyboy: HOW DARE YOU! ZAC**** IS THE ACTOR OF TROY BOLTON AKA MY SPIRIT ANIMAL

AmazingPhil: I JUST SAW IT TOO HE LOOKS SO GOOD

dannyboy: I KNOW RIGHT?????

LouiseP: daNIEL

PJ: HAH KNEW IT.

dannyboy: what

crabstickzzz: ur not good at being straight, my friend

dannyboy: oh come on! i may be straight but im not BLIND!

PJ: sure.

dannyboy: phil back me up!

AmazingPhil: Dan has a point.

crabstickzzz: spoil sport

crabstickzzz has kicked AmazingPhil from the chat.

dannyboy: OI

LouiseP: Chris, add him back in.

crabstickzzz: fineeee only cause ur scary

crabstickzzz has added AmazingPhil to the chat.

dannyboy has changed the chat name to welcome back fil.

AmazingPhil has changed the chat name to chris sucks.

dannyboy: i second that

crabstickzzz: wat did i do???

PJ: you’re really asking yourself that?

-

NOVEMBER 25TH

chris sucks

LouiseP: It’s been five days are you all dea?

crabstickzzz: yep im so dea

LouiseP: Oh shut up, like you can talk.

PJ: he never stops talking. don’t encourage him, for my sake.

crabstickzzz: do not

AmazingPhil: Do too

PJ: do too.

dannyboy: do too

crabstickzzz: alright i get it

LouiseP: Do too.

LouiseP: Whoops.

crabstickzzz: watevr

crabstickzzz: so dan have u figured out that ur gay yet

dannyboy: for the last time, im like 99% sure im straight

PJ: that’s 1% less than last time.

crabstickzzz: progress!!!

dannyboy: no its just that if evan peters wanted to fuck me, i wouldnt say no

LouiseP: Hardly anyone would.

dannyboy: see? it doesnt prove anything

AmazingPhil: well…

dannyboy: I THOUGHT YOU WERE ON MY SIDE

PJ: welcome to the dark side.

AmazingPhil: I just go for whatever side is winning! Can’t blame a man for surviving

dannyboy: thats not the saying

AmazingPhil: It is now!

dannyboy: weve been over this! you cant steal sayings and try to change them

AmazingPhil: I just did

dannyboy: why am i friends with you

crabstickzzz: bc u like him

dannyboy changed the chat name to ~ still not gay ~.

PJ: sure.

LouiseP: You say that a lot.

PJ: it’s because it’s needed. if dan didn’t deny the blatantly obvious, i wouldn’t have to be sarcastic all the time.

crabstickzzz: dont lie to urself

-

NOVEMBER 27TH

~ still not gay~

dannyboy: oh my god oh m y god

AmazingPhil: What?!

dannyboy: fcukin evan peters in ahs

AmazingPhil: ARE YOU WATCHING WITHOUT ME

dannyboy: maybe…

AmazingPhil: BETRAYAL

crabstickzzz: gayyyyyy

dannyboy: fuck off let me have this chris

PJ: yeah chris, fuck off.

dannyboy: thanks pj

PJ: it’s okay. also...

dannyboy: what

PJ: gayyyyy.

AmazingPhil: Okay but Dan has a point

LouiseP: True!

dannyboy: phil and louise are my only friends

crabstickzzz: danyul they both like guys doesnt that say something

dannyboy: psh whatever

-

DECEMBER 25TH

~ still not gay ~

dannyboy: ugh im stuck with sucky wifi away from home :(

AmazingPhil: Aw! Does that mean no skype tonight?

dannyboy: im using my data rn and its so slow, skype would be a nightmare. sorry phil

AmazingPhil: I’ll see you when you get back, then.

dannyboy: yeah :)

crabstickzzz: ugh stop flirting

PJ: yeah, get your own chat.

LouiseP: I think it’s cute.

dannyboy: yeah okay im leaving

PJ: he didn’t deny the flirting part though.

-

JANUARY 1ST

~ still not gay ~

dannyboy: new years and no one to kiss wow what a surprise

AmazingPhil: My offer still stands ;)

LouiseP: WAIT, WHAT OFFER?!

crabstickzzz: yeah wat offer

PJ: is no one gonna..?

PJ: okay fine I guess I’ll have to do it.

PJ: gayyyyyyy

AmazingPhil: I wish

dannyboy: keep dreaming philly ;)

LouiseP: I ship it.

PJ: join the club.

dannyboy: can anybody read what the title of this chat is

crabstickzzz: we can we just dont care

PJ: the only reason no one has changed it is because of its irony.

-

JANUARY 12TH

Private chat between dannyboy and AmazingPhil

dannyboy: ahH EVAN PETERS

AmazingPhil: Dan are you sure you’re not gay

dannyboy: well i mean i have liked girls before so even if i did like guys i wouldnt be gay

AmazingPhil: Bi?

dannyboy: maybe idk

dannyboy: but anyway EVAN PETERS

-

JANUARY 16TH

~ still not gay ~

dannyboy: this chat is so quiet

AmazingPhil: For the first time in forever

dannyboy: did you literally just reference Frozen

LouiseP: What’s wrong with Frozen?!

AmazingPhil: Yeah Dan what’s wrong with Frozen

PJ: he probably thinks its gay lmao.

crabstickzzz: dans literally the epitome of no homo

dannyboy: wow what a big word you used there chris

dannyboy: do you even know what it means

dannyboy: also i’ll have you know i have proudly never said no homo

AmazingPhil: I’ve tested that ;)

PJ: WOAH WHAT DID PHIL JUST MAKE A DIRTY JOKE?

LouiseP: PHIL, I THOUGHT I RAISED YOU TO BE A GOOD CHILD.

crabstickzzz: DAN WHAT HAVE YOU DONE TO HIM

dannyboy: wouldnt you like to know

crabstickzzz: wht te h fcuk

PJ: … GAYYYYYYY.

LouiseP: I second that.

AmazingPhil: I hope that

dannyboy: that doesnt make sense

PJ: okay, straight boy, he meant ‘fil hopes you’re gay, as in attracted to boys, no “no homo”’.

dannyboy: im not an idiot

crabstickzzz: debateble

dannyboy: debatable* dumbass

-

JANUARY 30TH

~ still not gay ~

dannyboy: HAPPY BIRTHDAY PHIL MY BEST FRIEND

LouiseP: Happy birthday! Wow, January went by quickly.

dannyboy: yeah can you believe that Phil Lester created January and the world was so hyped for his birthday it sped up time

PJ: oh my god, guys, holy shit.

crabstickzzz: what

PJ: DAN DIDN’T TALK ABOUT HOW BIRTHDAYS ARE A STEP CLOSER TO DEATH. AM I ALIVE?

crabstickzzz: hoLY FUCK UR RIGHT

LouiseP: Dan, you feeling okay?

dannyboy: jeez sorry for wishing my friend a happy birthday

AmazingPhil: I thought it was sweet

crabstickzzz: yeah we get it u love each other

PJ: they’re so cute but so gross.

dannyboy: i dont like phil cmon guys

AmazingPhil: I thought we had something :( you even forgot to talk about the inevitability of death for me :((((

PJ: hey, at least he didn’t say he doesn’t like guys or reference the chat name.

-

FEBRUARY 3RD

~ still not gay ~

dannyboy: ugh people suck

AmazingPhil: What happened?

dannyboy: nothing

PJ: sure.

LouiseP: You can tell us, Dan.

crabstickzzz: as long as its not blackmail worthy bc in that case dont be so sure

LouiseP: Chris.

crabstickzzz: i was joking, ofc he can tell us

dannyboy: nvm, i said it was nothing

-

Private chat between dannyboy and AmazingPhil

AmazingPhil: Seriously what happened

dannyboy: one of my old friends from uni keeps asking me when im getting a girlfriend or making jokes about my lack of love life every time he sees me and im sick of it

AmazingPhil: You’ve complained about him before and it you never seemed too bothered

dannyboy: yeah well…

AmazingPhil: ?

dannyboy: i know it shouldnt bother me but this time when i tried to ignore all of his questions about getting a girlfriend or whatever he said “you’re gonna turn gay and be alone”

dannyboy: like i know gay isnt an insult but at the same time it bugs me? is that wrong?

AmazingPhil: I don’t think so. Maybe it was just that he said something like that in the first place

dannyboy: maybe… or like some internalised homophobia idk i feel shitty

dannyboy: im just so tired of everyone asking me when im gonna get a relationship

dannyboy: my mum has been making hints at it lately

AmazingPhil: I love your mum but everyone should back off

dannyboy: this is cheesy but you’re the best

AmazingPhil: No problem <3

dannyboy: <3

-

FEBRUARY 4TH

~ still not gay ~

dannyboy: youll all be happy to know that i almost accidentally kissed a guy today

crabstickzzz: o H YM GOD DANYUL WELCOME TO THE GAY SIDE

dannyboy: a l m o s t + a c c i d e n t a l l y

PJ: sure.

dannyboy: i thought you had stopped with the sarcastic sures

PJ: keep dreaming, howell.

crabstickzzz: shut up time for the important qs

crabstickzzz: was it fil

LouiseP: Please for the love of god let it be Phil.

AmazingPhil: Let what be me

dannyboy: they’re freaking out over the almost kiss

AmazingPhil: Oh! Sorry guys, it wasn’t me

crabstickzzz: NOOOOOOOOO

PJ: sure.

LouiseP: Liesssssssssssssss.

dannyboy: it was this cute guy who ive been friends with for a while and we were messing around and whispering in each others ears to waste time during some meeting that was probably important and i turned just as he was whispering something and our lips almost touched

dannyboy: we jumped back just in time

PJ: there was so much gay in that that I can’t even form a coherent reason as to why it was gay.

AmazingPhil: Can you believe that Dan cheated on me :(((((()(09()

crabstickzzz: CUTE GUY? WHISPERING IN EARS? HOWL U R GAY OK

PJ: good news, chris just said my reasons for me.

LouiseP: Who’s the lucky guy?

dannyboy: first of all, weve been over this. i know when someone is cute, guy or girl. second of all, we were whispering creepy stuff like “mayonnaise” to try and freak each other out and third of all, not telling because id know you guys would stalk him

AmazingPhil: I know who it is ;)

PJ: i bet it’s phil.

dannyboy: nope. i said CUTE guy

AmazingPhil: HEY!

dannyboy: kidding. but no, it wasnt phil

-

FEBRUARY 8TH

~ still not gay ~

LouiseP: Alright, for today we put a halt on the usual Dan is gay discourse.

dannyboy: thank you friend

PJ: why? did someone die?

crabstickzzz: BREAKING TRADITION IS NOT ALLWD!!!

LouiseP: Shush, let me talk about a cute guy I saw today.

LouiseP: Anyway how do I ask him out?

AmazingPhil: Wait until Valentines and anonymously get him a rose.

dannyboy: ask him out or let your feelings pile up and watch him inevitably move on because you’re too scared to make a move

PJ: talk to him on the internet until you become best friends and be gay oops i meant straight for each other.

crabstickzzz: love poems via mysterious skype calls no one gets to know the contents of

LouiseP: The last two are unrealistic. Who talks to a stranger on the internet??? Stanger danger!1!!1!

dannyboy: fil i think theyre picking on us

AmazingPhil: Fair enough

dannyboy: YOURE SUPPOSED TO BE ON MY SIDE

-

FEBRUARY 11TH

~ still not gay ~

dannyboy: i cant wait to get nothing on valentines

LouiseP: Same.

AmazingPhil: Same

PJ: same.

crabstickzzz: sam

crabstickzzz: samr*

crabstickzzz: SAME****

dannyboy: this chat is so depressing

dannyboy: also learn how to spell

crabstickzzz: np

crabstickzzz: no*

-

FEBRUARY 13TH

~ still not gay ~

dannyboy changed the chat name to ~ not gay, but bi ~

crabstickzzz: I KNEW IR

dannyboy: shush

crabstickzzz: I FCUKIGN KNEWS IT

dannyboy: you saw nothing

crabstickzzz: YOURE BI

dannyboy: i was right about not being gay though

crabstickzzz: BUT I KNEW YOU WERENT STRAIGHT

PJ: WOAH WOAH WAIT WHAT’S HAPPENIGN OH MT FGDPL.

LouiseP: PJ ISN’T USING FULL STOPS!!! HE’S BROKEN!

LouiseP: DAN, YOU’VE BROKEN ALL OF US!!!

dannyboy: I SAID I WAS 99% SURE I WAS STRAIGHT

crabstickzzz: I WAS RIGHT AND YOU WERE WRONG

dannyboy: NO YOU THOUGHT I WAS GAY

dannyboy: WE WERE ALL WRONG

PJ: S T I L L.

AmazingPhil: This is so amusing

LouiseP: WHY ISN’T PHIL JOINING OUR FREAKING OUT?!

dannyboy: … might have came out already yesterday maybe haha dont kill me

PJ: WHAT?

crabstickzzz: FUK U FIL AND DANYUL

LouiseP: AND YOU’RE ONLY TELLING US NOW??????

dannyboy: yeah well coming out to phil was the first time ive ever done it so it was a little emotionally exhausted and i shook so much that i needed to recharge

AmazingPhil: He was so nervous but I’m proud of him

PJ: yeah, same.

LouiseP: I second that!

crabstickzzz: I FUCKING NKEW TOU WERE GAY

AmazingPhil: I thought we had gotten past this bit

dannyboy: chris, read the new name. im still not gay, just extremely bi

crabstickzzz: sry but i cant believe ur finally coming out

LouiseP: If you don’t mind me asking, what made you realise you were bi?

dannyboy: it all started with this one guy in high school who was so fucking hot and i had like a teensy bit of a crush on him and omg he was so pretty and one time i saw him literally leaning against a wall with his hair messed up and i died

dannyboy: i thought it was a one-time thing and i wasnt really sure if it counted considering ive only ever been attracted to girls before that, but recently ive just come to terms with that and the other thing

crabstickzzz: WHICH IS

dannyboy: nnnnnnnothing

PJ: sure.

AmazingPhil: Ha you guys aren’t on best friend level, so of course you don’t know

crabstickzzz: r00d

dannyboy: dont worry he doesnt know either, hes just being a little shit

AmazingPhil: Love you too

LouiseP: Can you imagine how much we would’ve freaked out over Phil’s message in August?

PJ: seasons change and people do too, apparently.

-

FEBRUARY 14TH

~ not gay, but bi ~

dannyboy: [image attached] someone sent me this chocolate rose with a note saying “- Voldemort” i wonder who that could be??!?!?

PJ: yeah, can anyone think of a super pale nerd who likes Harry Potter almost as much as Dan does and knows where he lives??? I’m coming up blank!!!1!!

LouiseP: Awwww, that’s so sweet!

crabstickzzz: barf

AmazingPhil: Thanks Louise I spent 2 whole pounds on it

dannyboy: spending so much for his boyfriend ew sap stop wasting money

PJ: bOYFRIEND?

crabstickzzz: WAIT I THOUGHT U 2 WERE JUST BEING WEIRD AND PLATONIC COUPLEY LIKE U ALWAYS R AND UR TELLING ME UR DATING

AmazingPhil: It turns out that the “other thing” Dan mentioned was him liking me

dannyboy: and also staring at his lips whenever he talks to me and thinkingaboutkissingthemmaybehah

LouiseP: CONGRATS, GUYS!

PJ: this is like my OTP.

crabstickzzz: *teenage girl voice* OH MY GOD MY OTP

dannyboy: lets leave before they start being weird

AmazingPhil: They’re our friends, don’t worry so much

crabstickzzz: so like did your first kiss involve tongue or

AmazingPhil: Yeah, bye.

crabstickzzz: he didnt say no

LouiseP: cHRIS.

dannyboy: if you must know, it involved NONE OF YOUR BUSINESS

dannyboy has left the chat.

AmazingPhil has left the chat.

PJ: …there was definitely tongue.

LouiseP: Agreed.

[swearronchanel]

BETTER LATE THAN NEVER 6.07

AHHH OMG, I was out all day & Actually MISSED the NEW episode like wtfff?!!? it was TOrture!! & I literally had to delete twitter and Tumblr off my phone because the devil himself would’ve tempted me lmfao😭 I love spoilers but not when everyone has seen the episode but me! it’s okay though I had some rum chata to distract me lol, which is just rum and horchata which is the Hispanic version of Horlicks so, At least I was in the CtM Spirit 🙃

Anyway I’m finally getting to watch it so here we go ..

shit I’m so nervous and I haven’t pressed play

why is my heart beating so fast omg

i usually skip the intro but I’m legit not ready

PHYLLIS !! 💕

damn Vanessa already hinting at what’s to come

Baby Susan so precious omg!!

No lie one of the prettiest babies I’ve ever seen. I’ve seen lots of ugly babies and lots of cute babies, I’m qualified to judge.

“Courage and resilience will matter most of all” 😭😭ahh omg

My spirit animal and campion Phyllis deserves nothing but the best I’m not ready to see her hurt

SHELAGH GETTING EXAMINED 😭😭💕💕 MY HEART IS BURSTING & her belly is so big omg!

CRYING SHE STILL CANT BELIEVE ITS HAPPENING ME EITHER BBY 😭 like holy shit I’m still not over it.

But I’m going to binge series 6 with my mother when I’m home Saturday and can’t wait for her to watch because she wanted to see shelagh have a baby & also she doesn’t know what tf has happened 😭😭😂 it’s been a crazy series! She will be s h o o k

“I know I’m just not a very relaxed sort of person” SAME but BBY RELAX 😭💕

LOL I WOULDNT HAVE READ IT EITHER

That was a cute moment with Babs and Shelagh!! But still wish it was w/ Trixie though 🙁 also it didn’t seem like a “heart to heart”? was it supposed to or was I expecting too much

Aw Rhoda 💔

what a ignorant ass teacher though, I’ll  FIGHT HER REAL QUICK

BOY OR GIRL??? I REALLY WANT TO KNOW UGH WHAT IS BABY TURNER??!

ugh Shelagh and Patrick’s faces 😫 I hope they don’t feel guilty for having a baby

But also why does shelagh have to keep wearing the same things lol, I feel cheated of all the cute maternity looks she could’ve served instead

“Having to explain” poor Mrs Antoine UGH THAT MAKES ME SO ANGRY, THERE’S NOTHING TO BE EXPLAINED   I’m mixed, Hispanic and white not black and white but still my dad is tan & we’ve been places where people have given my parents the dirtiest looks and have heard a nasty comment or two & it BOILS MY BLOOD

Omg the Antoine boys are precious

TRIXIE 😍😍 my bby looks good!

PHYLLIS IN TROUSERS HELL YES

UM VALARIE CAN U NOT BE RACIST

I swear if she says anything more I’ll lose my shit

“No one can really choose who they fall in love with” BLESS U DEELS

Bless Phyllis for making sure those cubs don’t grow up to be as ignorant as their parents

“I surmise the puller of teeth is intended to admire it” SISTER MJ IS A GEM

LOL SISTER J WANTS HIM TO COME THROUGH

SISTER WINIFRED WITH ANOTHER PRICELESS FACE IM DEAD

A bassoon? Lmaoo what the actual fuck Tim

Oh it’s for girls ofc LOL give him a girlfriend already, I’d get such a kick out of it. & Patrick could make another dad joke and say like take a lesson from me I legit beat God over a woman’s heart

The Mullucks fam 😭

Patrick with Susan omg aww

Trixie looking like a b a b e I’m dead 😍

“You’ll look like you’re trying to hard” DELIA HAHA OMG SHE GETS LIKE ONE MIN OF SCREEN TIME BUT SHE ALWAYS HAS GOOD LINES

I need Trixie’s everything, no joke. HOW

But I’m dying my hair blonder this week don’t play

Ah my bby shelagh again 😍💕

I feel so sorry for Patrick like this wasn’t your fault

LMAO SISTER WINIFRED CANT CONCENTRATE IN COMPLINE  SHE IS ANNOYINGLY PRECIOUS

She’s scared to take her driving test aw 😂😂 same like I have my permit but I’m scared to fail the actual driving test

“Oh I have a soft spot for the Antoines” PHYLLIS TIENE UN GRAN COROZON 😭

Omg Mr and Mrs Antoine are so cute too, dios te bendiga 😰

Christopher being a flake wtf no me gusta

Sister W is in on the drama like Sister B was, am I right??

LMAO HER RUN

Prosthetics are so wild, my abuelo has a prosthetic leg and I was so interested when he first got it. But also I’m going to hell for being evil because I joke around way too much when he’s extra senile

“People call my kids hair frizzy, but I think it’s beautiful” MY HEART😭💔 literally my mom was the same with me. Defensive over my curls - even tho my hair is frizzy sometimes😭

The song though, took me a second to process but that’s my bby shelagh’s song ?? Ummm wut

lol sister Winifred hella late, let me guess this will make her want to drive?

this prosthetic place is so great wow omg

damn it Bernie

PHYLLIS LOVES THIS FAMILY AND I LOVE THEM ALL OMG 😭😭

GET THE RUM ! or I will lol

ah never mind

LOL SISTER W AGAIN & PHYLLIS SHAKING HER HEAD

the question is, does/has sister Winifred drink/drank ? she seems like a light weight

fuck is this when it’s gonna happen

I’M NOT READY DAMN IT

damn Bernie..

UGH MY HEART IS RACING IM SO ANXIOUS AND SCARED AHJXKWLXM

HOLY SHIT OMGGGG

THAT WAS SO HARD AHH OMGG

IM FUCKING SCREAMING

Phyllis is in shock o h m y g o d

I can’t process this either

OMG I CANT DEAL

PHYLLIS IS SOBBING, IM SOBBING WTFFFF OMGG 😭😰😰😰💔💔💔

MY FUCKING HEART

I DONT KNOW WHAT TO DO OMG

AW SISTER W ASWELL UGH WTF I SHOULDNT FEEL SO MUCH

LMAO OMG THANK U FOR COMIC RELIF

TIM SUCKS LMAO stick to the damn piano boy

PATRICK AND SHELAGH GIGGLING OMG MY HEART IS OKAY NOW 😭😭💕💕

SHELAGH AND PATRICK BEING SO CUTE IM CRYING

DAMN THALIDOMIDE

DAMN THAT CAR UGH  

DAMN IT ALL

LOW FUCKING BLOW BERNIE THAT WAS NOT HER FAULT

BABS TRYING TO COMFORT PHYLLIS  IM CRYING AGAIN

SHE IS SO HURT, I AM SO HURT, IM A BLOODY MESS OF TEARS. IM SOBER AND SAD NOW & THERE’S MASCARA In MY CONTACT LENS & MY 3yr OLD GREMLIN LITTLE COUSIN IS KICKING ME (lol he’s laying next to me)

AND CARRIE CRYING NOW OMGGG NO LENNY WONT DIE STOP

“That lovely gp of yours” lol does everyone have a crush on Dr Turner but me? Lol don’t come @ me pls I’m sorry I know people love him 😭😭 Im here for Christopher and Tom But He is handsome, just in an older man way Lmaoo guess it’s cause he could be my dad 😂 lol he’s older than my dad

I’d take him as a sugar daddy real quick though. I need my tuition paid and he is so sweet😏 😭😂

So it was a scarf, hmm I thought trixie was gonna find like stockings or something

“Not Hermès but something very like it” lol how does Trixie know what Hermès feels like on a nurses salary?

Valarie is on my nerves & she’s had like 2 mins of screen time Lmaoo I’ve liked her until this episode. I hope they don’t ruin her for me

“But I’m a member of the institute of advanced motorists”  UGH PHYLLIS IS A GEM WHO DOES NOT DESERVE THIS !! SHE IS THERE FOR EVERYONE ALWAYS, SHE ALWAYS DOES GOOD WHY MUST THIS HAPPEN TO HER?

Aw Sister Winifred

Oh Rhoda 💔💔she’s such a great mother

MY HEART, THEY WERE WALKING AWAY FROM BEING TEASED

BLAME THE RACISTS, IT IS ALWAYS A VALID BLAME

YES PHYLLIS IS A GOOD WOMAN! 😭😭

Tom trying to comfort Phyllis😭😭

“You’re fond of your meat, and our views on God and His existence are divergent to say the least, but we both follow vocations…. so if you caused harm to someone else, even inadvertently would it not make you question what everything in your life has come to stand for?” I’m c r y i n g

“I, a rational woman, have no one to question but myself” 😭💔

IM REALLY HURT

“Sometimes cheering people on the sidelines doesn’t help”

my bby killing it 😍

Why you being a flake Christopher? go ahead man tell her about your kid

BRUH YOU DONT TELL HER LIKE THAT LMAO

he’s divorced ah, thought it was out of wedlock. I don’t care though haha

NO DRINKS FOR TRIXIE, TELL HIM BBY.. in your own time of course 💕

BABY SUSAN SO PRECIOUS

Fred brought her car ugh And Phyllis is still so hurt as am I 💔

This lady is so sweet! I hope she and Rhoda become friends right now

DID SHE TAKE DISTIVAL TOO?

lol wait where are the Turners I miss them??

“.. and the words ‘Nonnatus house this is not a midwife speaking’ are most unlikely to reassure the caller” SISTER MJ!

YES SHE DID OMG. I need them to be best friends omg 💔😭

“Nothing was said, nothing was done” 💔💔

PHYLLIS LOOKING AT THE CAR

SISTER MJ IS GOING WITH HER MY HEART OMG

my heart my heart

aw the mullucks'😭 ofc IT WASNT YOUR FAULT!

SISTER MJ IS A GEM 💕😭 & PHYLLIS IS JUMPING BACK IN

TWO GEMS 😭💕 but also if this was the birth they meant that sister MJ was involved in ill be lowkey sad, but we shall see next week if she’s randomly with Shelagh when she delivers

Trixie serving more looks 😍

Aw my bby 💔does she tell him about her alcoholism at the end of this ?

Also what are we guessing about Valarie rn?? she has a secret? tragic backstory to be unlocked? what ? She gay?

Aw the mulluks’s again! All so sweet💕 & YES LYDIA BE FRIENDS

ugh Christopher looks good af😍 and that car yes

YES TRIXIE 😍 my girl looking good as well

SHE TOLD HIM 😭 IM CRYING IM SO PROUD 😭😭💕💕WHY DO I FEEL SO PROUD FOR A FICTIONAL CHARACTER??! I love her

Oh shit Patsy’s dad is dead. I assumed that was coming

Phyllis reassuring Delia awww

PHYLLIS BACK AT THE CUBS 😭 MY CHAMPION AND SPIRIT ANIMAL BOUNCING BACK

Lenny’s speech omg brb crying

The support group for thalidomide victims omg my heart

I was cryin before and now I’m crying more for this Irish lady

Omg side side side note there was this cute old interracial couple that seem like my parents in 20yrs in JFK yesterday that were so precious and sweet and we’re talking to me the whole time waiting at the gate & then there was this sweet Irish couple who were confused about the time difference and I helped them out and then when we landed they helped me out looking for my bag so now I have much more faith in humanity because usually the people in NYC airports are angry new yorkers who don’t care lol like me (jk)

“There’s no rule of life so simple or so true ..” 😭😢💔💖

Thank u Vanessa I’m so emotional, show me next week 

Bonus: next week

OMG PHYLLIS HUGGING SHELAGH OMGGG. I NEVER KNEW I NEEDED TO SEE THIS

PHYLLIS BETTER DELIVER THE BABY I KNOW I WANTED TRIXIE BUT IT DOESNT SEEN LIKELY AND SO INEED PHYLLIS (sister J too ofc?! She was barely in this past episode)

MY BBY SHELAGH’S TUMMY IS SO BIG IN HER UNIFORM OMG SHE’S SO PRECIOUS I LOVE HER I MISSED HER THIS PAST EPISODE

BUT OH MY GOD BABY TURNER IS COMING HOLY SHIT THIS IS HAPPENING THIS IS NOT A DRILL

HERE COMES THE PILL READY OR NOT #LETSGETIT1962

Lol oh shoot I didn’t take mine yesterday or today brb

AW DELIA

WHAT IS SIGNIFICANT ABOUT BABS SLEEPING I NEED TO KNOW

Lol idk why but even though I like Tom and Babs their relationship just doesn’t do anything for me😂😂 like I don’t give a shit? They’re cute but idk it doesn’t cut it. Like they’re just there and I’m like “aw ok”

OMG I CANT WAIT WHAT WILL HAPPEN ?! I NEED ANSWERS

I will die next week. For real. 

[patz254-blog]

Closet

I woke up that morning from a deep sleep and thought to myself “wow, what a crazy weekend that was!” . It took me a while to realize or more like accept that I had finally come out to my friends and my family who were very supportive and it felt liberating and as i thought to myself “i can finally be me” . I quickly got out of bed with a great deal of excitement as i would be starting a new phase of my life and get ready for college. I headed downstairs to have breakfast and was greeted by all my family memebers present on the dining table and we all had our breakfast as per normal talking about work, life and college. Things were finally feeling normal after the couple of years that I have had. I headed straight to college after and attended my classes and my first subject was biology , I sat beside my best friend and as always concentrated on on our gossip as per normal. We mostly talked about girls and who are the ones we fancied the most in class/college but this time it was more like who my friend fancied and we just got into an animated conversation about it and he wouldn't stop going on about it and when it was finally my turn to contribute in the conversation i said “hey ! dont you think that guy over there is cute,i am getting vibes he may be like me and like me too!” i saw my best friend’s reaction and he said “yeah sure maybe”  . I was a bit taken back because i expected more of a response from my best friend than just that but i let it slide without thinking about it too much. I met the gang after class for lunch and they all greeted me as per normal and we began to have our usual discussions about which teacher we like or whats happening in our campus. I felt something off as i could see no one was really standing next to me even though they were right infront of me. We had lunch and while we were in the middle of it a friend of mine had gotten a pink strawberry drink and he didnt feel as i would say “manly”enough to drink it so he passed it towards me and said “you might enjoy this more” and laughed with everyone.I let it slide, my pride was hurt but i decided to brush it off and just laughed along. Something felt off.. We played football that day later in the evening and I was made to be a goal keeper instead of my usual mid-field position as they said “it might be too rough for me” I began to wonder, “Is this because of my sexuality that they dont think it was manly enough for me to be in my usual position?” I decided t enjoy my game and carry on but I just couldn't shake the feeling everything has changed. I went home after the whole day thinking i might find some solace in my house but as soon i got home my parents were flipping the channels on their tv and I saw broke back mountain being played on the screen and i was sitting in the dining watching the movie, unaware that my parents didnt realise that i was watching with them and i heard my dad casually say “how can a man love another man in the exact same way? that is absolutely against nature” My dad knew I was gay and he still made that remark and i began to question myself “Is this really the same person who supported me since yesterday and he loved me regardless pf my orientation. I walked in to the living room and they shut the tv off and hoped that i didnt get any more influenced than i already am.and I was seriously hurt , my parents, my friends and even my best friend said “they are really happy for me” and they acted like i was a completely  fine. and  treated me so differently.  deep down I knew, the world accepted me on the face but i still felt like an outsiders was even close from the family. Everyone accepted the fact that they judged but it wouldnt stop with all the remarks of the car and thats when they Realized that yeah maybe i let myself be vulnerable and now here i am taking shots in the name of “making fun” . I realized you can only come and truly her you no matter what is going through and thats when i realized and asked a question for myself, “Am i truly free?”   and am i liberating as they saying”maybe it was a bad in dea to get back in the closet and now i sthink to myself “am i really free for from everything?”