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There’s just no way that Aaron would want to dress up and wear makeup. He’s the least camp guy I know.
05-Jan-2018
#robron#robert sugden#aaron dingle#blue puffer jacket#grey striped jumper#the birthday party aaron had zero interest in#without robert not there#robert playing cyrano to the pointless one#the polittless one shows his true colors#Leeds festival tickets#which they still didn’t go to did they?#indie music#nme mags#sing-along 😬#robert taking his ring off 😭#no he WON’T know aaron better than robert#20180105#robron episodes 2018
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the things that make up a life (FINAL)
Summary: Hotch helps Jessica move Roy into her apartment. It doesn't go well, and he's supposed to fly to Chicago to celebrate Fran's birthday afterward. (Coda to 10x20 & 10x21 because combining them makes for pain.)
Warnings: for this chapter? we just have some tears and ice cream.
Pairings: Hotch/Morgan
Words: 3.3k
Notes: Did you see this coming? Huh? Huh? DID YOU? I didn't think so. :) I'm sorry, I am the actual worst. I hope you don't hate me too much.
Read on AO3: the things that make up a life
**
“Come pick up the cake with me,” Derek said, pulling on a pair of jeans. Aaron stretched stiff muscles, pointing his toes and wincing at the ache in his lower back. Moving that recliner would eat at him for days. “The bakery is only a few blocks away.” In Derek speak, that meant at least a mile, maybe more. He wasn't sure Derek knew what “a few” really meant, it was used as a gently worded trick too often. Still, Aaron had nothing better to do with his day and he woke up without the intense pounding in his head so he'd like to see how far he could ride that.
He hummed his response, a noise that Derek knew was as good as a yes (or at least not a no) before pulling the blanket up over his head and closing his eyes in staunch protest of being awake. The bed was warm and soft, far too good a place to vacate if he didn't really have to. And he was on vacation, even if it was only for two days and even if he wasn't handling things well...he didn't have to get up. It didn't take long before he felt Derek's weight on top of him, legs straddling his midsection while his hands rooted around for a hold to pull the blankets back by. Aaron held firm, tucked himself in tight and smiled.
“Ten more minutes,” he moaned, curling his legs beneath Derek who was laying with his full weight against Aaron's body now.
“No way,” was the response. “We gotta be at the bakery by 11.”
“It's barely 9...” Aaron muttered from beneath the blankets, knowing he'd caught Derek in his “a few” lie. “How long do you think it'll take to walk a few blocks?”
It was Derek's turn to hum, knowing he'd been caught. Still, he dug in. “Up.”
Aaron wasn't sure that the bakery even existed, they seemed to walk so far. Winding through residential streets, beneath looming train tracks, watching Jack jump from the curb to the street and back again. He skipped cracks and waved at dogs on leashes, completely in a world of his own while his fathers walked at a slightly quickened pace a way behind him. Aaron thought Derek intended to talk, the way he kept careful distance between them and Jack...talk about his distressing state of mind, a topic Aaron had no interest in discussing but he would do it if Derek asked. He never said a word. He just walked close, bumped shoulders intentionally at least once per block, a playful smile following it up hoping to drag one out of Aaron as well.
He hadn't thought of Roy or Jessica yet, not in any substantial way, and the tears he'd decided to associate with that photo of Sean were a distant memory. His headache had come back, but that hadn't surprised him, and he intended to medicate himself as soon as they came back so the family party that afternoon wouldn't be ground zero of another melt-down. It was so unlike him, unable to trust himself or his defense mechanisms. His shields were down, and he wasn't even sure they were under repair yet. There was some part of him that wasn't certain it had anything to do with Peter Lewis, but then he couldn't source another point of origin so he clung to it...and in that same way, he was able to convince himself he could simply wait it out and go back to his comfortable baseline.
“Is this bakery actually in Chicago?” Aaron asked, and Derek gave him a sly look out of the corner of his eye and paused in front of an ice cream parlor. The building looked old, the dusty pale turquoise and red stripes on the awning looked about thirty years past their best by date. It was more powder blue and pink, but Aaron could tell that wasn't how it had started. He had the feeling that roller skates and malted milkshakes had been a regular thing at one point. Or at least teenagers and school dances.
“This is the spot,” Derek announced, leaning forward to open the door and tugging Jack by his shirt collar to toss him inside before he kept wandering down the street. Tiny bells over the door announced their arrival. A small man in an apron and glasses came teetering out from some back room and smiled beneath a bushy mustache.
“Derek Morgan!” The voice was deep and rich, it hardly looked like it could possibly come from the man behind the counter. “When your mama told me you'd be coming by with your family to pick up the cake, I couldn't believe it. Been what...fifteen? Twenty years since I last saw you. A family! Never thought you'd settle down.”
“I wouldn't say I've settled down,” Derek said with mock offense and Aaron hung back in the doorway watching the way Jack was eyeing the selection of packed ice cream tubs. The kid flew it at complete ease with the world, leaned against a red vinyl topped stool and stared hard at the icy sweets. “Would you say I've settled down?” He turned to Aaron who looked like a deer in headlights all wide eyes. The word family was rattling around in his foggy skull.
“Don't think that's possible.” Aaron smirked, trying to play as cool as he could but he knew it was a poor replica of cool. In truth, Derek was about as domestic as a golden retriever, but Aaron couldn't imagine a time when Derek hadn't been in all honesty. Sure, he liked to have his fun, he liked to have no strings attached dates and club nights, he liked to party, but it was all an act. He was always looking for quiet nights and someone to be his little spoon, someone who would make him breakfast and teach him how to use the coffee machine he owned but was mostly just ornamental. There was a time that Aaron thought he might be the only person outside of his immediate family that actually knew the real Derek, the fuzzy socks and morning breath and can fix your faulty wiring or leaky pipes but doesn't know how to program his DVR Derek. He liked it that way.
“Here,” Derek said, breaking Aaron from the hazy daydream he'd slipped into. Unaware how long he'd been away, he glanced down at his hands before taking the small sugar cone topped with a pillowy swirl of vanilla soft serve and then over at Jack whose cone was considerably larger and fuller, looked like Rocky Road topped with gummy bears. “You good?”
“Yeah,” he said, wrinkling his nose. Derek hefted the huge sheet cake into his arms and licked at his own cone, one that seemed identical to Aaron's except his had chocolate and vanilla swirled together and was topped with brightly colored sprinkles. The ice cream cone of a boisterous child, not a grown man. “I'm good.” Good enough anyway. He wasn't bad and that had to count for something.
The walk back felt quicker, probably because of the ice cream melting over their hands. It wasn't exactly hot out but it was warm enough that ice cream didn't hold up. Aaron licked some of his soft serve off of his knuckles and realized he was eating his much too slowly, Jack had already taken his mound of ice cream down into his cone and Derek's was long gone. It really was a couple of blocks; Derek had just insisted on taking the long way and maybe Aaron couldn't blame him. It had forced him out of his head, watching Jack closely as he skipped along up ahead, listening to the birds and the traffic and the trains.
“Hey Jack, run this cake in to the freezer so it doesn't melt, we'll be in in a minute okay buddy?” Derek handed Jack, who was licking the ice cream from his fingers as he crunched the last bite of his waffle cone, the whole cake and nodded toward the door. Like they were speaking in some secret code, Jack grabbed the cake and ran inside without a word of protest. Aaron's sensors, foggy as they may have been, were throwing out weak signals of alert.
“What's up?” he asked, nibbling at the edge of his soggy sugar cone more than a little nervously. Derek's face erupted in a wolfish grin and he stepped closer. Almost too close.
“There are about a million better times I could do this,” he began softly, slipping one hand into his pocket and fishing around. The item his fingers slipped up against had been in the pocket of every pair of pants he'd worn over the last few months, pushed deep and waiting patiently against his thigh. “And I've passed up some of them already. Told myself I'd know the right time...maybe it wouldn't be the most romantic or the most story worthy time, but it would be right.”
“Derek,” Aaron protested, the cone freezing and damp under his fingertips. He felt the throbbing in his forehead again.
“I swear to God if you ruin this moment right now,” Derek muttered, one hand taking Aaron's in its grip. It was the hand from his pocket, and Aaron felt the sudden weight of something small and cold, undoubtedly metal against his palm. He stopped breathing, he was certain of that. “Don't think about it.”
He didn't say a word. There was no question to answer, Derek wasn't asking anything. He was making a statement that they both knew had been answered a long time ago. Now it was just punctuated by a band of gold that Aaron knew without a doubt had belonged to Derek's father, his wedding band. Both late and great, he'd heard through the years, a man so loving and so good that Derek could have turned out the way he had after having him for so little a time. It was heavy, thick, flecked with tiny nicks and dents. It wasn't new, and the way Derek slipped it into his hand felt weighted with more than just his own promises.
That the ring, now pressed and burning into his palm, belonged to Derek's father meant many things. First, this was not only premeditated, but it was done with Fran's consent. She had to have kept in a jewelry box or a safe, somewhere secret for the right time just like Roy was doing for Jack, just like he was also doing for Jack. And then the second sure thing hit him, Jack's face when he took the cake. He knew. Maybe Derek had been old-fashioned enough to ask Jack's permission. The look in Derek's eye was foxy, mischievous, he wouldn't put anything past him. Maybe the ice cream man had his own part to play. There was a conspiracy here.
In any case, he knew one solid truth: that it was not a question and Derek requested no answer. Their life was the answer. Aaron held the ring against his palm and blinked hard against the familiar sting of tears. “Not Derek Morgan settling down...” he croaked in a voice that barely resembled his own, and Derek let out a boisterous laugh. The kind that crinkled his eyes and opened his mouth wide. The kind that exuded pure joy and made Aaron's legs feel weak.
“Derek Morgan settled down a long time ago, buddy.”
He didn't put it on his finger, not immediately and Derek made no move to do it for him. That wasn't on his agenda. At one point he'd romanticized the bended knee, slipping a ring onto Aaron's finger, rose petals or a jumbotron at a Bulls game...the whole ordeal but when he'd realized this long weekend was going to be the time, and then when he'd seen the way Aaron showed up he let go of it all. The ring was the part that mattered, the anchor to this life, the reminder that Roy and Haley could always be important but they were his past and this...Derek and Fran and Jack, this was his present and with the ring in his hand, they would be a solid fixture of his future.
It wasn't until they slipped quietly inside and Derek pulled him into the front room that he became aware that he was breathing again. It was quick, too labored, but there was breath. It was a start. Derek stood them in front of the mantle that was littered with framed photos of Derek and Desiree and Sarah as children, the kinds of photos that you knew if you opened the frames there would be a stack of ten more just like the top one in varying years, each with a different colored background and a school appropriate smile. Aaron had always wondered at Derek's smile, how charming and easy it looked even while he was experiencing some of the worst of humanity. He felt Derek's chin on his shoulder, arms locked around his waist and settled into the embrace with his eyes locked a little too long on Derek's police academy graduation photo, how like his father he looked. How proud of his accomplishment, following in his father's footsteps, how Fran must have wept with both joy and fear. Her love was overwhelmingly poured over this crowded mantel. His eyes trailed over the pile of frames, the mantel of a mother proud of her family, over photos from her wedding to Derek's father, happy smiling youth excited for the life they were starting together. Roy's home had looked like this once, and he'd been a part of it. Roy had his senior portrait framed beside Haley's, beside their wedding photo, beside the day Jack was born. Letting himself sink into that was brief, so brief because his eyes caught on something he hadn't expected.
Jack's smile. Jack's most recent school photo, there beside her wedding photo. It was pressed tight against the glass, and he knew without examining further that there were more behind it...Derek had been sending her the photos every year. Next to that sat a candid photo of Aaron and Derek standing beside one another, shoulder to shoulder, at a summer barbecue in Derek's backyard. Derek's 40th birthday, they'd gone all out. Flown most of his family out, put them up at a posh hotel, done fancy dinners and the whole nine yards. A week of celebration culminating in a sweltering July afternoon drinking beer and grilling in their backyard. It didn't fit with the theme of the posed photos, but it was there, and they were smiling. Huge grins.
“You know what that is?” Derek asked, squeezing Aaron a little tighter the moment he realized Aaron had seen it. Not that he'd intended it necessarily, the photo had been there for months, it was there the last time they'd visited but Aaron clearly hadn't paid it much attention or noticed it at all. “That's love. We love you. My whole huge, obnoxious family that will be here in less than an hour took you and Jack into the fold and you're just part of it now whether you like it or not. You may be idiot Hotchners, but you're also Morgans now.”
What he meant, in barely veiled terms, was fuck Roy and his pictures of Sean smiling. Fuck Roy and his scrubbed photo albums and his poison words. Aaron couldn't agree with the sentiment, but he did appreciate it, the way it calmed the beast in his chest. He was crying again but that was neither surprising nor unwarranted. Derek was laying it on a little thick for his fragile state of mind.
Aaron put the ring on his finger in time for the party but his breathing still hadn't returned to normal and his headache was back in full force. It felt like being trapped right at the start of a panic attack, that moment of dread when you realized you were about to fall into the pit and there was nothing you could do to stop it, you'd already passed the point of no return. Things were good and he was happy but he didn't know what to do with it. Nothing here changed what he was going to head home to – Roy still hated him, Roy still lived with Jessica, and she was still mad at him for things he wasn't going to change. There was nothing that would make him suddenly decide to tell Roy what he thought, or how he felt, it simply wasn't going to happen and she would have to come to terms with that. He hated to think about the possibility that she couldn't but it was right there, throbbing in his temples.
“You should call her,” Derek said, sliding up beside Aaron while he watched Jack playing with his cousins in the backyard. He hadn't realized he'd gone away again while he stood silently, the loud party swirling around him. More people than should have been in the home were packed against each other laughing and sharing stories and celebrating Fran and her deep love for her huge family. “Call Jess. Go outside and call her, then come inside and let me show off how damn domesticated I am. You owe me.”
“I do?” Aaron asked, smirking. Derek grinned.
“You know you do.”
His conversation with Jessica was quiet. She wasn't sure what to say, he didn't know how to say what he was thinking, they were at a stalemate. Finally she caved. “I'm not mad at you, Aaron.”
“You have every right to be,” he said softly, and she could barely hear him over the roar of the train behind the house. Over the backyard it rumbled and he paced the cement patio, trying to hear her. “I know what I did.”
“You're not responsible for what happened, Aaron. Yeah, your job put her at risk but I'm not stupid enough to think that you had anything to do with it. God Aaron. He tried to kill you, he put you in the hospital. Serial killers don't exactly subscribe to logic...that mad man chose you, that wasn't your fault. I would never...”
“Jess.”
“No, Aaron, dammit. Listen to me.” She went into a full rant, her words flying at him faster than he could absorb them though he didn't miss the feeling behind them. She was desperately clinging to her intense love for him, over and over proclaiming that not once had she blamed him for what happened even if she understood the logic behind it. She ranted, threw her emotions at him as fast as she could, much faster than he could take them. She'd already laid into Derek with all of it and somehow, as rehearsed as it sounded, he knew it. Didn't mind much. Them talking behind his back meant he had to talk less.
“Derek proposed to me,” he broke in during a quiet moment of contemplation, and she laughed. He didn't like the sound of it. Another layer to Derek's deception...she'd known too. He probably asked her permission, that wouldn't surprise him in the least. Old fashioned fool.
“No he didn't,” she spat and he could see the look on her face even from so many hundreds of miles away. “He just gave you a physical reminder that you're already in it up to your eyeballs with him. You idiot. You can be so thick sometimes.” She was crying. He could hear it thick in her voice. “You said yes right?” She laughed through her tears and it made his throat feel tight.
“I suppose,” he replied. “He didn't really ask.”
“How can someone so brilliant be so stupid?”
He smiled and felt the hot sting of tears on his own cheeks now. He couldn't believe he still had any tears left to cry. “Will you pick us up from the airport tomorrow?”
“Maybe.”
It was good enough. More than. Aaron balled up his fist inside of his pocket and ran his thumb along the thick gold band around his finger.
Just making sure it was real. He didn't think he'd ever get over that.
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#aaron hotchner#derek morgan#jack hotchner#jessica brooks#roy brooks#criminal minds#hotchgan#mortch#fanfiction
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Survey #267
“you can take my heart, you can take my breath - when you pry it from my cold, dead chest.”
When did you last talk to the last person you kissed? Last night. Do you think people have any misconceptions about you? Oh, I'm positively certain. What’s something you wish you could understand better? There are a great many things, but the first that came to mind are certain political/moral beliefs that I REALLY do want to understand, but I just don't. When was the last time you cried really, really hard? About a week back when I woke up shrieking and sobbing from a nightmare about Dad. Have you ever injected a drug? No. How many people have you liked in the past 5 months? I've been COnfuFSSeD!!!!!! Are you currently in a relationship? Nope. Probably for the better. Have you ever touched a dead body? Animals, yes. I may have at an open-casket wake, but idr. I was young. Ever played Grand Theft Auto? Nope, but oh man, good memories of those stupid games with my neighbor back when I was younger... He loved that game just to fuck around, and I liked watching. Then Jacob and Jason played it together at the apartment a lot, and those are warm memories, too. The last male you spoke to … is he attractive? That would be my 3-year-old nephew, so it'd be fucking weird to call him that. He's one handsome little boy, though. We all know he's gonna be a lady killer one day. If your ex called right now, would you answer? Yeah. Is there a dictionary on your bookshelf? I don't even have a bookshelf. Do you have any pet names for the person you love/like? Not anymore. Who was the last person you had a serious conversation with? What is your honest opinion of that person? Mom. I love her to death. Who was the first person you dated? What is your honest opinion of that person? Aaron was my puppy-dog love, and I have not the slightest clue what he's up to now, but I have faith he's kept that good head of his. Ever fallen in the shower? I've passed out while getting *out* of it. I've slipped a number of times too, but not truly fallen. Do you think that things will get better? For me, I genuinely don't know. Ever been to a bonfire party? Yes, by my cousins' friend's pool for a b-day party. It was cool. Their house was fuckin' wild. Movie theater inside and all. Is your dad bald? Just about. His head is just mostly shaved. Have you ever slept at a member of the opposite sex’s house? I mean yeah, all the time when we were together. Have you ever hooked up with someone to hurt someone else? Wow, no. I don't do "hook-ups" anyway. Do any of your relatives actually pinch your cheeks when they see you? No. Have you ever made a member of the opposite sex cry? Ugh, yeah. Do you know the last person you kissed's parents? Yes, I adore them. Do they like you? I think so. Name a couple things you can cook. ... Literally just scrambled eggs, if you mean something pretty much from scratch. Well, I could probably still do pasta if I read the box. Who was there to help you last time you were puking? My mom. I am absolutely terrified of vomiting, so she's kind enough to somehow manage to stand in there with me and talk to me. Are there any boxes of tissues in your room? What’s the design on it? No. Are you in high school? When are you done? No. I graduated in 2014. Are you embarrassed to say if you’re a virgin or not? More like confused and awkward, because I genuinely DON'T know for sure. Have you ever met someone you thought you’d be with forever? It was "certainty" to me. That's partially why the breakup was so traumatizing. I MEAN IT when I say my brain couldn't even fathom the idea. It was "impossible." It simply couldn't happen. Then it did. ^Where are you two now? We haven't spoken in three years. Has your best friend ever been in love? Yes. What was the last magazine you bought? I've never been a magazine person. Will the last person you kissed get you anything for your next birthday? *shrugs* Do you think Family Guy is funny or just stupid? It can be both. Have you ever stayed with someone who treated you like shit just because you liked them so much? NO SIR-EE. You'd never see me stay with someone who treated me badly. Would you date someone all your friends and family hate? If I REALLY liked them, but if everyone hated that person, I would seriously consider why that is. Are you already looking forward to your wedding? Ha ha, not really, in most ways. Like, I hate getting all fancy and such. Have you ever spit on someone? No. Would you rather cuddle or make out? I MEAN, that depends on the mood??? Has your best friend ever been cheated on? No. Do you text with one hand or with both? Both. Are your parents left or right-handed? Right, to my knowledge? What was the last photo you took of? Something on FB I wanted to show to Sara. What topic always interests you and you will never tire of? C R Y P T I D Z Are you more or less tolerant than the average person? If you mean of varying beliefs, stuff like that, definitely more. If someone were to rate your life, what film certificate would it receive? PG-13 or R, idk. Actually, probably R for all they profanity lmaooo. Do you mind eating cold fries or are they disgusting? Ewww. What song makes you cry? What about it makes you cry? I physically cannot listen to "Stairway to Heaven" by Led Zeppelin because of Jason joking at prom that the music sucked and we could dance to something like that, then once he took me home, I played it from my iPod over his car speakers and we danced in the headlights of his truck and it all felt like a fairy-tale. I'm emotional just typing it and it makes my stomach hurt, so moving on. If you could remake a movie, which movie would it be? Silent Hill: Revelation. As a fanatic over the series, I enjoyed it decently, but, objectively, it sucked and was ALL over the place. How about if you could rewrite a book's ending, which one? Why? I don't think I'd change any. Maybe a clearer answer to The Handmaid's Tale, but it's still g. What colour hair does your sibling(s) have? Brown, except Misty and Katie. Theirs is black. What gemstone would you like on your wedding ring? A dragon's breath opal or rose gold would be gorgeous. What are you looking forward to in the near future? We're throwing my little sister a surprise graduation party at our older sis's house. Thanks to the quarantine, her senior graduation isn't *actually* happening, so. How is life going for you, anyway? Be honest. IT KINDA S U CKS!!!!!! What time did you get changed this morning? I haven't changed out of my pj's. I almost never do (besides obviously after a shower) because I have nowhere to go, like ever. Have you met somebody that you want to spend the rest of your life with? Yeah. Have you ever dressed up as a Disney character? Which one? Maybe as a kid? Have you ever played chess? If so, are you good at it? I’ve never played it. If I wanted to buy you a chocolate bar, what kind should I NOT get? Ew, Snickers. Of all your close friends, who have you known the longest? Sara. What was the last song you heard, that made you feel emotional? Hm. Maybe "Disguise" by Motionless In White. I wonder all the time if that's how Jason felt. Plus it's his favorite band, so that's a double whammy. When was the last time you took a selfie? Maybe about a month ago. As a child, did you ever have any scented gel pens or markers? Oh, I remember those! Yes. Name an alcoholic beverage that you dislike. Hell, most that I've tried. I hate strong stuff. Can you recall the last time you were on a dancefloor? When I was shooting someone's wedding last year. Do you own any color-changing mood jewellery? No, I have zero faith in those. What was the last thing you heated up in your microwave? Ummm pizza rolls, I think. What was the last flavor of ice cream you had? Moose tracks. Do you have an online game that you play often? I play World of Warcraft daily, and I enjoy the Dragons of Atlantis app a few times a day. I was into it when it was still a game on an actual website, and I more recently downloaded it on my phone. What’s your favorite cookie? Soft chocolate chip... yum. How long would you have to date someone for before moving in together? I think this depends very much on the relationship, BUT LIKE, definitely not TOO quickly because you need to test the endurance of the relationship. I'd at the very least give it a year and seriously consider how healthy the relationship is. Moving in with each other shouldn't be an impulsive "this is working great omg I love him/her let's do this!!!!". What's your favorite kind of sushi? N/A How much was the last bill that you paid? I've never paid a bill... wow, that's sad. What was the cause of the worst low point you've had in your life? A very abrupt, traumatic breakup. What are some of your favorite types of cheeses? Really just American. When did you last feel like your privacy was invaded? I'm not sure. Do your parents volunteer anywhere? No. Do you own more than 50 books? I have my Warriors books stocked somewhere. Probably in the attic. Do you have a bachelor's degree? Bitch I wish. How old were you when you became financially independent from your parents? I'm 24 and still aren't independent. Does your kitchen have an island? No. Have you ever bought or sold something on Facebook Marketplace? No. Do you know anyone famous enough to have their own Wikipedia page? No. What was the last appointment you had? With my psychiatrist over the phone because yeah quarantine. Why did you last feel like crying? I woke up from yet another nightmare. I'm so, so tired of them. They make me dread sleep. Do you keep your friends secrets/private information to yourself? If it truly is private, yes, and secrets, absolutely. What negative quality do your friends bring up the most? "I... don’t think I’d like to be friends with people who have a habit of bringing up 'negative' things about me." <<<< This. Do you often "jump" to conclusions? ONLY ALWAYS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! What about the world do you wish you never found out? Christ, there's a lot. For some reason, the first thing that came to mind is the dogmeat trade in Korea. A girl in my first semester did a presentation on it, and just... wow. I never had the slightest clue it was a thing. Does the sight of blood make you feel sick? No. Does someone's background affect whether you'll be friends with them or not? Well, yeah. I'm not gonna be friends with a rapist or something. How about their religious background? Depends on if they push that shit on me or not, as well as things they believe. If someone admitted cheating in a past relationship of theirs, would you trust them? NNNNNNNNNOPE. Do you drink tea and/or coffee every day? There are so many tea/coffee questions in surveys... and no. I don't like either. Did you ever want to be a cook as a kid? No. Do you wish that magic was real? Well, it depends on what the magic is. Do you prefer fire or ice? Fire is cooler. Do you rap along with rap songs? No. When happy, do you become more talkative? WAY MORE. Bowling or sailing? Why? Never sailed before, but bowling is fun. Especially with the lights off but all the neon and signs lit up. Do you prefer sitting in the front or back of a car? THE FRONT!!!!!!!!! Sitting shotgun and being able to control the music is everyTHIIIIIIIIIIIING. How about in a train? On the bus? I don't really have a preference here. Do you care about politics? I should... Are you offended easily by non-politically correct language? No, honestly. Do you think the censors/fcc go a bit too far or are just right? Definitel too far. Have you ever taken a martial art? Which one(s)? No. Do you know anyone who is scared of you? No. I am so unintimidating. Do you like watermelon? Not really, no. Can you remember the month of your first kiss? April or May, p sure. What do you think is the most interesting thing about you? Uh. I dunno, man. Do you have a photo album? Mom has tons. What was your biggest fear as a child? Thunderstorms. I was fucking terrified. Can you remember all your past teachers' names? The majority. Do you find people taller than you intimidating? Generally tall men do, but not always. What's your favorite thing about your country? We have a lot of freedom. What's your least favourite thing about your country? We're greedy as fuck. What websites do you have bookmarked? I have a few on my personal laptop, which I don't have access to now so can't recall well. What TV show scared you as a kid? Courage the Cowardly Dog... though I watched it anyway lmao. What is one thing you regret having done or not done in your life? There's a lot. Let's not focus on it. Which parent do you identify with the most? I guess Mom. What embarrasses you the most in front of other people? laskdjflawe admitting I RP is almost ENTIRELY IMPOSSIBLE to others, especially in-person. If you had to choose one thing you were most passionate about, what would it be and why? Politics, 'cuz that's shit that seriously matters and affects the world. Who are you most envious of—real or fictional—and why? Probably an old friend who's an award-winning, quite successful photographer here in the state. She's shot fashion and model stuff professionally. She's absolutely gorgeous, does the coolest stuff... What’s the saddest song you’ve ever heard? Good Lord, I know so many. "UR A WOMAN NOW" by Otep is one, then there's "Terrible Things" by Mayday Parade, "Cancer" by My Chemical Romance... wow, I'm so surprised they're not just rushing to me. How about the sweetest song? Biiiiiih "Here For You" by Ozzy Osbourne laskdjfk;awe Do you know how to play dominoes? No. What food will you absolutely not, under any circumstances, eat? Exotic/endangered animal meat. What is one thing you’re embarrassed to admit you want to try? Uhhh I'm really not sure. Which famous person would you like to be BFFs with? Shane Dawson is MEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE. Is there something you wish you had said sorry for but never did? Many things.
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There are too many interesting things in the concert ask that I wanna answer so I’m doing them all. :^D
How many concerts have you been to? 28 so far.
Have you been to any festivals? Not any proper ones. I guess Paganfest was technically a festival, and same with Heavy Metal Heart, but they were small and indoors so idk.
Which artist/band have you seen the most live? Korpiklaani.
First concert you went to? My Chemical Romance.
Last concert you went to? Heavy Metal Heart 11 Day 2 (Winterthroned, Brymir, and Korpiklaani)
What is your next concert? Ensiferum.
Which artists/bands would you love to see live? Bands I wanna see again: Children of Bodom, Wintersun, Ensiferum, Korpiklaani (always), ALESTORM, BILLY TALENT, Iron Maiden, Nightwish, Arkona. Bands/Musicians I wanna see, period: AC/DC, Lady Gaga, Blackpink, Dalriada, Marina and the Diamonds, Nicki Minaj, The Pretty Reckless, WARMEN, That Poppy. And as I’ve said, I would have loved to see Michael Jackson, 2NE1, My Chemical Romance, Norther with Petri, Enska with Jari, and Tokio Hotel in the Scream or Humanoid era. Actually even Zimmer 483 era woulda been awesome.
The farthest you’ve traveled to go to a concert? Ehh... idk whether Guelph to Toronto or my current home town to Helsinki is a longer trip. The former took longer, but that could be coz of the bus route. I’m too lazy to look it up. Point is, I haven’t traveled very far at all for a concert.
Best opening act you’ve seen? Winterthroned wasn’t technically an opening act but they’re the only ones who come to mind. Eluveitie was pretty good, I guess. I liked them better live than I do otherwise (they opened for Bodom the first time I saw them).
Worst opening act you’ve seen? Whatever bands opened for Billy Talent the first time I saw them. I’ve never been a screamo fan, my dudes, and those headache-enducers did not help that fact.
Have you met any bands/artists at a concert? Not AT the concert, but afterwards, I’ve met all of Korpiklaani, Chris from Alestorm, Olli and Tuomas from Turisas, Masha and Vladimir from Arkona, and, if we’re counting the listening party, Teemu and Jukka from Wintersun.
What’s one thing you have to bring to a concert? Money to buy merch.
What’s the most you’ve paid for a ticket? $78 (Canadian) for the Trans-Siberian Orchestra. (Side note: I looked through my tickets for this question and I’m dying @ the prices I’ve paid for shows there holy fuck metal bands have spoiled me..........)
Best concert you’ve been to? Most concerts I’ve been to have been AWESOME, but my first show will always stand out because it was the first, and it was my favourite band, and it was at the height of my love for them, and I still refer to it as a spiritual experience coz, well, that’s what it felt like. I’ve never felt such a connection to a crowd since, I’ve never had music touch my heart that way since, I’ve never felt that passion and whirlwind of emotion and sheer awe since.
Worst concert you’ve been to? Honestly, probably the first time I saw Children of Bodom. Not because the band or set-up was bad or anything, but because I got pulled down into the pit,grabbed by assorted people, a drunk man put practically all his weight on me and tried to kiss me??? and I had to punch him to get away, I got separated from the people I was with, and I ended up having to spend the whole show near the back, not even able to see the band. And this is literally all I remember from the show!! What songs did they play? What antics did they get up to? HELL IF I KNOW!!
Have you been in a social media post an artist posted after a show? YEAH, since moving back to Finland and making sure to be in the front as often as possible I’ve found myself in loads of after-show pics on Facebook. :D Also, when I saw Ensiferum and Finntroll in Canada, I was mentioned in a Finnish newspaper in Toronto coz they could see my Finnish flag. B) Not social media, but still cool.
Funniest concert memory? The singer of Winterthroned asked if we wanted to hear a joke and we were like YEAH and he was like it’s a bad one and I yelled EVEN BETTER and he applauded me and told the joke: “What does it say at the bottom of a Swedish swimming pool? ... Smoking Prohibited.” ... which I found hilarious for some reason. And the whole thing was so random I was just like lolwat. There are probably funnier things I’ve seen but this is so recent it’s the first thing that came to mind.
Do you buy your tickets as soon as they go on sale, after, or the day of? As soon as possible if it’s a band I love, maybe later if I’m not sure whether I want to/can go, but I never the day of, I don’t wanna risk it being sold out.
Have you ever been noticed by an artist at a concert? Hahaa, yeah. The Finnish flag got me noticed at the Ensiferum and Finntroll show by almost everyone in both bands. I was also front-and-center the first time I saw Korpiklaani at a tiny club in Toronto, so it was kinda hard not to get noticed. I also kinda tugged on Jonne’s hair to get his attention, whoops. I apologized after the show, though. :^D And at Paganfest I was also front-and-center and when Alestorm was setting up I got a fist-bump from Chris!
Have you met any internet friends at a concert? Not yet... :0c
Which concert that you’ve been to has had the best stage setup/production? Trans-Siberian Orchestra’s set-up was pretty boss. MCR’s was definitely impressive when they were touring for the Black Parade, too. I don’t usually pay that much attention to that, since it’s rarely a big deal at the shows I go to. :P
Have you ever caught a guitar pick, drumstick, got a setlist, etc.? I got Finntroll’s setlist when I saw them, and I’ve got picks from Korpiklaani, My Chemical Romance, and Wintersun. Also, when I saw Billy Talent in Finland, I CAUGHT AARON’S DRUMSTICK, but so did the 3 girls to my left, and since they were all there together, they won the tug-of-war. :(
Favorite concert venue? The Opera House in Toronto became a fast fave, and in Helsinki it’s Nosturi, followed by Virgin Oil Co., followed by The Circus.
Least favorite concert venue? The Sound Academy in Toronto annoys me for some reason. Also don’t really like Kaapelitehdas in Helsinki, but I’ve only been there once. I think it’s coz they’re both kinda inconveniently situated, and something about the layout, especially Kaapelitehdas.
Which do you prefer: indoor or outdoor concerts? Indoor.
Which do you prefer: clubs, theaters, arenas, or stadiums? Clubs.
Have you ever missed school or work to go to a concert? LMAO YES. Or, well, when I worked, I’d make sure to book that day or weekend off well in advance, but school? Lol, I was an excellent student, I can miss a day or an afternoon no problem.
Have you ever been surprised with tickets from someone? My mom got me a Billy Talent ticket for my 17th(?) birthday, but other than that, nope, I’m usually the one surprising others with tickets.
Who do you enjoy going to concerts with? Ehh, I’m used to going to concerts alone, so it kinda throws me off when I’ve gone with someone. It’s not bad, it’s just weird. Different. I haven’t gone to shows with anyone one person enough to answer this.
General admission or seated concerts? General admission.
Have you been to multiple dates for one tour? No. :(
Have you been to concerts 2 or more days in a row? No. :(
Have you ever received free tickets from a contest or an artist’s crew? Nope.
Have you been front row and/or back row for a concert? I always strive to be at the front, though sometimes (first time seeing Bodom, last time seeing MCR, only time seeing Stam1na) I started out in the front and either got forced to the back or had to shove my way there lest I have a panic attack and die or something.
Have you ever gotten sick, bruised, or broken a bone after a concert? I’ve probably caught a cold from waiting outside in below-zero temperatures wearing jeans, a tshirt, and a hoodie (ain’t nobody got time for coat check). And of course I’ve found mystery bruises. No broken bones, though.
Have you ever had surprise guests at a concert you attended? Jon Gallant from Billy Talent appeared on stage during the opening band’s set the last time I saw MCR. That was awesome. I knew the bands were friends, but I never saw that coming. :D
Did you start listening to an opening act after you saw them in concert? I really liked what little I heard of Valkeat, who opened for Wintersun. I also liked Winterthroned, though as I said, they weren’t technically an opening act. Both are on my “listen to more of” list.
What’s the latest you’ve got home from a concert? Whenever I went to concerts in Toronto, I’d have to crash at my dad’s place in Richmond Hill and then get home a.s.a.p. the next day if I had school or work, so... latest getting to my dad’s was probably 6:30 to 7:00 in the morning, and if we’re counting actually getting home then like... 11:00 to noon the next day? Haha.
When is the earliest you’ve arrived to a venue for a concert? 8 hours before doors.
Have you seen your favorite artist in concert? Yep, but I’d love to see them more!! Alas, I cannot, as they have broken up.
Longest you’ve waited in line for a concert? 8 hours. In rain and snow. Without a jacket or gloves. #YOLO
Have you ever attended a concert alone? Almost exclusively.
What’s the best part of a concert in your opinion?
Have you ever heard/seen an artist soundcheck before their show? Nope.
What’s the biggest venue you’ve been to a concert at? The Air Canada Center or the Molson Amphitheater. Not sure which one’s bigger.
What’s the smallest venue you’ve been to a concert at? Mod Club, the place in Toronto where I first saw Korpiklaani.
Have you ever had side stage seats? No.
Which venue have you been to the most concerts at? Nosturi, maybe?
Do you post a lot about a concert you’ve attended on social media or very little? I post pictures and might tell a story or two. :^D
Has a concert or tour you were planning on going to got cancelled? No.
Have you seen a band in concert before a member left the band / they broke up? My Chemical Romance for BOTH -- I saw them before Bob Bryar left and after, and obvs before they broke up altogether. Saw C.o.B twice before the Roope debacle, too. And I’m not sure about this, but is Aaron not touring with Billy Talent anymore? Oh, and I’ve seen Ensiferum before Emmi left. Well, other than that I’m not sure about line-up changes and whatnot.
Favorite song you’ve heard live? Probably “Famous Last Words” and “It’s Not a Fashion Statement, It’s a Fucking Deathwish” by MCR.
Have you ever seen an artist/band play an album in full? My Chemical Romance played The Black Parade in full and came back and did a bunch of songs from the previous two albums.
Which artist would you refuse to see in concert? Uh. Anyone I don’t like?? Idk, there are some artists where I probably wouldn’t buy a ticket myself, but if someone wanted to take me, I’d go. It’s hard to think of specific bands/artists I would refuse to see. You couldn’t pay me enough to go to, like, a grindcore show or some screamo shit or techno/DM/whatever you call that nonsense my brother listens to. Oh, and obviously NSBM is completely out of the question.
What’s the craziest thing a fan has done at a concert you’ve been to? Crowd-surfing/stage-diving. I remember at Paganfest while Turisas was on security barely had to do anything, Warlord had that shit under control, he’d just toss bitches back into the crowd.
Which venue(s) would you love to go to for a concert? My favourites...? There aren’t really any special venues I’m dying to see, lmao.
Have you ever been to a concert at a venue that no longer exists? Not that I know of.
Have you ever lost something/got something stolen at a concert? I lost my bus ticket home at an MCR show which fucking sucked coz I was super low on money to begin with and I had to buy a new one using my Finland Fund. >.>
Have people made fun of you or laughed because of how you were acting at a concert? Ehh, one time I covered my nose coz someone behind me was smoking weed and the smell makes me nauseous and I kinda didn’t wanna throw up or pass out, and my boyfriend at the time got all huffy and annoyed and was like “grow up” and I said “you grow up” and rushed off and people laughed a bit, but more like in a “daaamn u fucked up” way imo.
Have you ever been kicked out of a concert? Nope.
Has an artist thrown or spit water on you? Nope.
Have you ever seen a security guard dance to a song at a concert? No.
Have you seen any acts you don’t like at a concert? Huntress and Ex Deo at Paganfest. -_-
Have you ever passed out or thrown up at a concert? No, thank the gods.
Have you seen any artists in concerts that you don’t like anymore? Nope!
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Bill Gates isn't interested in space exploration and doesn't like Elizabeth Warren's wealth tax: Here are 5 highlights from the billionaire's DealBook interview
Bill Gates isn't interested in space exploration and doesn't like Elizabeth Warren's wealth tax: Here are 5 highlights from the billionaire's DealBook interview http://bit.ly/2PXPefw
Bill Gates had a wide-ranging discussion with The New York Times' Andrew Ross Sorkin at the DealBook Conference in New York City on November 7.
When asked if he shared Jeff Bezos' interest in space, Gates told Sorkin, "[Bezos] can have it."
Gates also said his children tease him for not being tech-savvy enough because he prefers to communicate by email.
Visit Business Insider's homepage for more stories.
Bill Gates isn't interested in space or juggling iPhone apps to communicate.
These are just two of the thoughts the billionaire shared in a wide-ranging discussion with New York Times reporter Andrew Ross Sorkin at the DealBook Conference on November 7. The day-long conference brought together Airbnb CEO Brain Chesky, Uber CEO Dara Khosrowshahi, Hillary Clinton, Kim Kardashian West, Kris Jenner, Goop founder Gwyneth Paltrow, and others to discuss the intersection of business and policy at Jazz at Lincoln Center in New York City.
Here are five highlights from the Gates interview.
1. Bill Gates thinks billionaires should pay higher taxes
However, Gates said he isn't a supporter of the wealth taxes proposed by Democratic presidential candidates.
"I happen to believe something in the middle [of the two parties]," Gates said. "I think you can make the estate tax higher; you could even take people who have sat on huge gains for say ten years, and say okay, you should create a taxation event there. I think just by treating capital income the same as labor income, that goes a very long distance, so I'm all for super progressive tax systems."
Warren's wealth tax would cost Gates an additional $6 billion in taxes annually, Sorkin said during the interview. Gates said he's already "paid more than anyone in taxes," totaling more than $10 billion in his lifetime.
Other ultra-wealthy Americans including George Soros and Abigail Disney have lobbied for a moderate wealth tax and cited Warren's proposal as an example, Business Insider previously reported.
Hillary Clinton, who was interviewed by Sorkin later in the day, also expressed support for a high estate tax, saying that a wealth tax would be "too disruptive," and that she "couldn't see" how it would work. While the idea of using a wealth tax to solve America's inequality problem has gained traction in recent years, proposals have been hampered by questions over the effectiveness and the constitutionality of such a tax, Business Insider previously reported.
2. Gates is more interested in solving malnutrition than exploring space
When asked by Sorkin if he was interested in space exploration, Gates replied, "No." When Sorkin alluded to Jeff Bezos' plan for space colonization, Gates interrupted to say, "He can have it."
Gates said he has talked about space exploration with Bezos, and that he "read a lot of science fiction but I guess not as much as [Bezos and Elon Musk] did." Business Insider previously reported that Bezos' space exploration plan was heavily influenced by a 1976 book he read in high school that proposed connecting the Earth and the moon via a series of enormous, cylindrical tubes.
Sorkin asked Gates why he isn't interested in space, to which Gates responded: "Because malnutrition is so much more impactful. You know HIV is more impactful, malaria is more impactful.
3. Gates thought Warren Buffett played a "parasitic" game before they became friends
"I didn't even want to meet Warren," Gates told Sorkin, "because I thought, 'Hey, this guy buys and sells [companies],' and so he found imperfections in terms of markets — that's not value-added to society, that's a zero-sum game that is almost parasitic. That was my view before I met him."
The pair has since gone on to share a 28-year friendship, Business Insider's Shana Lebowitz previously reported. Gates was even introduced at the conference as "Warren Buffett's best friend."
4. Gates believed "billions of dollars" would come from his meetings with Jeffrey Epstein
"I made a mistake in judgment in thinking those discussions would go to global health," Gates said. "That money never appeared."
A New York Times investigation published in October found that Gates met with Epstein multiple times after Epstein's conviction in 2011, including at least three meetings at Epstein's Manhattan townhouse. Following the publication of that story, a spokesperson for Gates said Gates regretted the association, but Gates himself hadn't publicly addressed it until Wednesday afternoon, Business Insider's Aaron Holmes reported.
"I gave him the benefit of my association," Gates said.
5. Gates said he's too "large-screen oriented" for his kids
"I have kids that think I don't see the world in a modern enough way, including even some technology things they use," Gates said while explaining that he is a normal parent who washes dishes and takes his kids to school. Gates has three children: Jennifer (23), Rory (20), and Phoebe (17).
"I'm not as phone-centric as they are," Gates said. "I mean, I have to tell myself, 'Oh I've got to check Instagram because my youngest daughter likes to communicate there,' I have to check WhatsApp because another child likes to communicate through that. It's like, oh my God, I have to do all this? But you know, if I forget to do it, then it's like, 'Wow, you're not paying attention to my life.'"
When it comes to communication, Gates said he prefers emails.
SEE ALSO: Bill Gates blames anti-trust lawsuit for Microsoft's big miss on mobile: 'Instead of using Android today, you would be using Windows Mobile'
DON'T MISS: Bill Gates is celebrating his 64th birthday today in a 20-year-old hat. Here's how he spends his $108 billion fortune, from a luxury-car collection to incredible real estate.
Join the conversation about this story »
NOW WATCH: Traditional Japanese swords can take over 18 months to create — here's what makes them so special
Tech via SAI http://bit.ly/2ZZpEbV November 7, 2019 at 04:11PM
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better without you
Why did you close the door the last time you closed one? i realized that keeping the door open was pointless, nothing will ever change. Stripes or polka dots? Stripes. Do you care if people touch you when they’re talking to you? nah I'm italian, it shows that they're interested What is your gender? female. Do you think that people think its obvious? Yeah i mean lololol
How long did your last date last? about an hour or so. he had to be up early to work the next morning. Is your favorite color within 10 feet of you? nopeeee Highlight of your day? getting an extra punch on my donut tour card. Would you rather be on a boat or a plane? yacht
Can you tell when girls (or guys) have eyeliner on? da Can you cook? Yep. How high is your ceiling? no clue, like 7ft Whats the worst job you can think of? hooker Do you swear a lot? every damn day Does the last person you texted have an O in their name? 2. first and last Is everything working in your house? I'm gonna assume so Would you rather have a pool or a trampoline? Pool for sure. Does pop give you energy? No. not even close TV show you love with a passion? criminal minds. Do you think you learned anything from the worst night of your life? that i am stronger than i think
Perfect age to get married? 26. soon someone cuff me, I'm running out of time Is it safe to say you own over 20 pairs of shoes? 110% Name a career path that women are known for taking. nurse Favorite type of cookie? sugar cookie from potbelly’s A quality you look for in choosing a significant other? tall. What would I find if I looked in your pocket? Nothing.
What was your first word? ball A musical instrument you wouldnt mind learning how to play? piano. Last time you went to 7-eleven? pride, to get an icee A fast food restaurant that you hate with a passion? wendys Does everyone in your family have a job? da. Going anywhere this weekend? i work a yoga event saturday then going out downtown chi. sunday i work a craft beer festival in lincoln park. Is your room ever clean? every day What does it mean when you're being quiet? thats I'm annoyed Last person you had a face to face conversation with? grandpa Wheres your phone? on the table next to me Do you know the difference between your and you’re? Yes How late did you stay up last night? I went to bed around 1 Anyone you’re ready to kill? stevan because he won't answer my snaps. Do you need to get a tan? 110% hence why i got a tanning membership at the gym What do you want? to get my own apartment. Favorite TV show as a kid? out of the box
Whats a show that you absolutely refuse to watch? bob’s burgers How many times have you been in love? looking back on it, twice Go camping or go to a party? party hard. Do you remember how old you were when you started swearing? 12 How many years older than you would you date someone? 6 What was the last thing you pinky swore on? I don’t remembert. Would you consider yourself a nice person? Yes. Are there a lot of mirrors in your house? Probably a typical amount. Has there ever been a serial killer in your house? Not that I’m aware of… Do you know anyone who looks like Adam Sandler? No. True or false: Glee is annoying. I never saw an episode. Last thing you cooked? tacos. Do you use slang often? Some I guess Wear glasses? when needed
About how old was the last person that hit on you? 24 What color are your headphones? black like my soul Would you make a good teacher? Why? Nope.i get annoyed with stupid people Dont you hate those commercials that try too hard? I don’t like any commercials. Is the fan on? No. Any special reason why you're taking this survey? waiting to see if stevan shows up and i finished all my work What does the last text message you sent say? "forget about it”- taylor
Your friend needs you to run to the store to get a pregnancy test. Do you? yesss Do you log out on facebook when you leave the site? No. What color are your underwear? blue How short are your nails? long af Do you like the opposite sex to be dominant or you the one in control? dominant Favorite holiday? Christmas. If I asked you to point to Ohio on a map of the US do you think you could? probs Youre locked in a room with spiders. Do you have an issue? ew yea Do you wear your most expensive item of clothing often? nah Do you eat a lot of food? Sometimes.
Have your parents ever tried to control your relationship? They tried, i should’ve listened Have you ever had to give someone directions before? Yeah Speaking of which, are you good at understanding driving directions? hahaha nah How many people do you text daily? maritza, taylor, lexi, stevan, aaron, nada, my dad Do you play any instruments? Which instruments do you play? Guitar though I haven’t been played in a while Is there anyone who you call by their last name? brooks and brownie What did you do on your last birthday? blacked out Which of the Seven Deadly Sins do you commit the most? no idea Has anyone ever told you that you’re incapable of whispering? every day
What is your least favorite subject in school? psych Have you ever been involved in a custody battle before? No Do you know a couple who constantly sucks on each other’s face? da, its gross When was the last time you watched a YouTube video? the other night Have you ever babysat a newborn baby before? yeah it blows When was the last time you held someone’s hand? Yesterday. How many meals have you eaten today, so far? 2 Do you think it’s stupid for people to call others “hot?” Uh. i mean like no? Do you personally think Wikipedia is a reliable source? It obviously isn’t. Have you ever shopped at Wet Seal before? Did you like it? once, it sucked. Do you care about spending money if it’s someone else’s money? depends What is your favorite Disney movie of all time? cinderella When you were a child, did you ever want to become a wizard/witch? No Would you rather have hardwood floors or carpet? Hardwood. Who was the last person you yelled at? Why? maritza. she was annoying me As a kid, did you ever go to camp? No. Have you ever made out in a movie theater before? Yeah. Are you currently trying to learn to play any instrument? No. When was the last time you went somewhere you thought was haunted? maritza’s house so today Who was the last person to compliment you? aaron How old were you when you got to go on your first date? 13 Would you call your parents over-protective or under-protective? depends Did your parents ever let you play in the pits of those multicolored balls? yeah ha Have any of your siblings ever had a crush on your significant other? Lol no. Are you the jealous type? No. When was the last time you felt like you were high on life? last weekend at volleywood Do you know someone who cares about themselves more than their child? yesss Do you still watch cartoons on television? no What do you usually order at Taco Bell, if you go there? 3 soft shell tacos, cheese, meat, lettuce Is there anyone currently annoying you? stevan. Do you have freckles? A few. How many dogs do you have, if any at all? 100
Have you ever witnessed someone being beaten up? Yeah. Do you think biting is weird or sexy? It can be sexy. Would you rather be called hot or beautiful? Beautiful. Have you ever had a pet turtle before? No. Do you still sleep with your parents when you’re scared sometimes? i don't even live with my parents Have you ever met someone with two different color eyes? ya Have you ever felt like someone was following you? yes What color shirt are you wearing at the moment? nude Do you enjoy going school shopping? i did. I'm done with school Do you think Pug dogs are adorable or just plain ugly? ass ugly Have you ever met someone who completely resembled their pet? No What was the worst substance you’ve spilled on yourself before? blood Have you ever made out with more than one person in one night? hahahahahaha Do you think there is a soulmate out there for everyone? I don’t believe in soulmates, nor do I think everyone wants one.
Do you like short or long surveys the best? Somewhere in the 30-50 question range. Have you ever bought fake money and tried to make it pass for real? No. Are your siblings nice the majority of the time? Yes. Do you freak out when a thunderstorm comes along? No How often do you shower? Every day Have you ever had to sell something for a school fundraiser? yeah How many sodas do you usually drink in one day? Zero. Have you ever met someone who was completely weird all-around? Yep. Do you ever watch any soap operas? No. Have you ever met someone who was mean to everyone? I guess. Do you usually have a low tolerance for pain or high tolerance? I have a high tolerance. Would you rather eat or sleep? sleep Are you one of those die hard Twilight or Harry Potter fans? neither Do your parents ever force you to talk to your grandparents? i live with them, so i have to talk to them Do you think long surveys are boring or entertaining? It depends on the questions in them. Have you ever learned that someone had lied to you all along? Yeah. Have you ever wanted to be a lawyer? yea Have you ever had to bail someone out of jail before? No. Is there anyone in your immediate family who was adopted? No Do you know anyone who doesn’t have any common sense? lexi When was the last time you bought something? today i got donuts and bubble tea Do you think you look anything like your parents? my mom What are your plans for this weekend? I already answered this. What color is your significant other’s hair? single
Have you ever applied for a job at Walmart before? no i have an education Would you ever become a foster parent? no. Are you ashamed of anyone in your family? haaahhaha Would rather talk to someone on a landline or a cell phone? facetime Has anyone ever given you a psychiatric assessment? yeah What is your favorite amusement park? 6 flags Did you ever have braces? Yes. What is cuter: kisses on the forehead of the cheek? forehead Do you believe in evolution or creation? Evolution. Would you rather take a bath or a shower? Why or why not? Shower. Does it bother you when people touch your personal items? no. When was the last time you did something sexual? Last weekend Do you collect anything? What? pins. shot glasses. boy’s souls Are you better at hand-drawing things or painting? I have no artistic talent. Have either of your parents ever called you a failure before? No. Have you ever suspected someone of cheating on you? Yeah and I was right. When you get married, will you convert your last name? sure Are your parents divorced, married or separated? Married. Has someone ever left a relationship with you for someone else? da What’s the most painful thing you’ve ever experienced? an abusive relationship When was the last time you went shoe shopping? couple days ago Are you a part of any clubs at your school, if you still go to school? pi theta alumni Do you know someone who wears a wig? casey but she's black and its a weave sooooooo What is your best friend’s last name? bolyard When was the last time you cried? For what reason? today, rocco got so scared of a firework and he took off running, poor dog. What is your favorite shop to go to at the mall? forever21. What time do you usually go to bed on the weekends? 5am Have you ever considered suicide? no Have you ever been raped before? Yeah Would you ever consider becoming a marine biologist? yea. Did you carry a lunchbox as a child? yea What is your favorite ‘sweet’ to eat? candy candy Are you someone who usually eats when you’re bored? Now and then. Have you ever eaten your way through a breakup? No. Who was the last person you texted? lexi Do you usually buy popcorn when you eat at the movie theater? Maybe half the time. Did you sleep alone or with someone last night? Alone. What kind of dressing do you eat on your salad, if any? honey mustard Are you someone who constantly likes to wear hats? yes, dad cps Have you ever seen a Lifetime movie that relates to your life? probs What is your Myspace URL? What year is this? Are you someone who likes to wear dresses more than pants? in the summer. Have you ever dated someone who was way overprotective of you? hahaha yea, it was disgusting What was the last thing you touched besides your keyboard? my phone When was the last time you witnessed a fist fight? end of school Do you know anyone who lives in the state of California? yes
Are you waiting for a text right now? uh huh fuckin stevan Is it your summer vacation right now? i mean no i graduated and am an adult so Do you like traveling? Yes. I wish I could do it more often and farther afield. What color are the walls of the room you’re in right now? white Do you still make mix cds? No. Are you eating or drinking anything right now? nope
Do you go to church regularly? no, I'd burn Who’s your best friend? tay bae Are you determined? About some things
Are you always looking for/in a relationship, or do you like being single? i like being single but its time to find someone Ever had your heart broken? Yeah. Even broken someone else’s heart? Yeah. Are you confident? yeah. When’s the last time you smiled? Earlier. Are you tan? No.
Any big plans for today/tonight? supposed to meet trent for drinks What’s the background on your computer? my cousins and i from christmas
Do you have days where you just want to listen to sad songs? Yeah. Don’t you hate when your plans fall through? yssss Ever maxed out a credit card? all the time How old are you? 22 Who’s the last person you kissed? i don't want to answer Are you hoping they will also be the next person you kiss? lol no Do you ever actually go on dates? i have one tonight.
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Survey #213
"there's a voice in my head, says i'm better off dead, but if i sing along a little fucking louder to a happy song, i'll be all right."
Are there popsicles in your freezer right now? No. Ice cream? No. Is there a lamp in your bedroom? Well, two heat lamps for Kaiju and Venus. Would you prefer eating jello or pudding? Pudding. After washing your hair, do you put any products in it? No. Last time you ate a salad? Yikes, it's been a long time... Can you name 2 books of the Bible? Uhhh Luke and Revelations? Do people usually think your brother is handsome? I don't know, I haven't lived with him since I was a kid, and he doesn't live in my state. So we don't know the same people. Have you ever crawled thru a vent? Not to my memory. Are there toothpicks in your kitchen? They're in the bathroom. How many living grandparents do you have? One. Do you eat more than 3 meals a day? No; I don't even always have three. Do you know how old your house is? I believe it was made in the '70s. Do you think you have great potential for success? Meh. Have you applied any lipstick, chapstick, gloss, etc to your lips today? No. Would you rather have tan or pale skin color? Pale. Sometimes I hate it, but I like it more overall. Especially when you're a goth at heart know what I'm sayin'. Last time you entered a high school? Probably my sister's graduation. Last time you rode a bike? It's been years, dude. Probably not since high school. Do you drink your water from the tap? You couldn't pay me to. Our water is technically clean, we've had it tested, but dead serious, the hot water smells like rotten eggs. I'm pretty sure Mom said it's something about the salt content in the pipes. But nevertheless, mind over matter would nooot work. Is there any kind of design on your socks? I'm not wearing socks. Have you ever had an ice cream cake for your birthday? No, I'm not a fan. Do you use dryer sheets? Yes. Do you like Subway? Yeah. What was your worst mistake in your life? Letting a guy become god, the entire universe, and more to me. Is this year the best year of your life? Oh, hunny- Is there someone in your life you wish you never met? I don't think so. Did you sleep well last night? I never do. I always wake up at least once. What’s the last song you heard? "Happy Song" by Bring Me The Horizon is on repeat. What is your favorite line from a TV show? I don't have a clue. Any current family issues? No. Who is the last friend you spent time with outside of school? Summer and I talked for a while at my niece's b-day party a few days back. What do you think of your mother? Your father? Your siblings (if there are any)? I love them. There's one sister I don't know so can't really say anything on her, then I do have another sister who, if I can assume via Facebook interactions, can't be too fond of me. But I could be mistaken with my habit of said assuming... Who/What is one person/thing that had the biggest impact on your life? Who: Jason. What: my mental health. What is the biggest problem in your life right now? How isolated I am and void of purpose I feel. What is one band that you find yourself going back to again and again? You mean like, stop liking but then get back into? None, I think. Have you ever had a crush on someone of the same gender as you? Yes. Have you ever kissed someone of the same gender as you? Yes. Do you and your dad get along? Yes. What’s the longest amount of time you’ve ever kept a goldfish alive for? Idk. Can you see your purse right now? Yes. Are you wearing any perfume? What kind? No. Are there products in your hair? No. Have you ever eaten cat food? I don't think so, though I wouldn't be surprised as a kid. How many pets do you have? Six. Do you actually like them? All but my sister's dog. I can't stand him. Do you have one best friend who is always there for you? My girlfriend. Do you wear skirts a lot? I never do. I hate my legs. Do you basically live in jeans? I have zero jeans. Do you wear sweatpants a lot? Not really; if I'm not in pjs, I'm usually in dance or yoga pants. How many pairs of jeans do you think you have? Zero. Do you like hoodies? Yeah. Big ones or the form fitting kind? Bigger ones. Did you ever actually have a rubber duck? I think I did. Are you one of those people who claim to live with no regrets? I go back and forth, lol. But no, I have regrets. Do you love your computer? It's got a few issues, but yeah. Do friends or family come first? Family of the heart, anyway. Us sharing blood doesn't mean shit to me, honestly. What’s your lucky number? I don't believe in "lucky" numbers. Who were the last 5 people you spoke to? I'll include via technology because otherwise I have no clue. Mom, Sara, Emma, and two women interested in adopting Kaiju. Do you have the same password for everything? No. Do you get shy around the person you like? Sometimes. What color is your phone? Dark navy. Do you prefer pens or pencils? Pencils. Do you like peanut butter? Yes. If you could live forever, would you? Hell no. Do you talk in your sleep? A lot. What was the last thing you regretted? Probably depression binge-eating something. Are you any good at cutting hair? Never tried. Do you like your yearbook picture this year? N/A What was the last YouTube video to make you laugh? Ummm there was something last night, but idr what. Do you like tomatoes? No. Do you have a pool? I wish. How would you describe your style? Too poor and lazy to be a goth so dresses in whatever is at the top of my drawer tbh lmao. Do you still talk to any of your exes? One. Have you ever been arrested? No. What was the last thing you watched on TV? I don't watch TV by my own volition anymore and there's not even a TV in my room, so... I really don't know. Do you have a tan? Even the Irish are ashamed of me. What was your most embarrassing moment? Who knows. I'm so easily humiliated and affected by it that I can remember times I've been even remotely embarrassed as far back as pre-k. Do you fall for people fast? No. Do you tell your parents everything? No. Are you quick to judge? Depends. Not generally. When was the last time you crawled through a window? I have zero clue. Are you scared of spiders? Most, yes. What would you do if the doctor told you that you were pregnant? Have a full-blown panic attack despite that being physically impossible. Do you plan on moving within the next year? It'd be nice, but I estimate it'll be around two more years. Have you been to a baby shower? Yeah. How many cars can fit in your driveway? Hm. A few, since the parking area behind the house is decently-sized. Are you taller than your mom? No. Are you a cuddler? Yes. Sleep on your back or stomach? My stomach/upper torso kinda to the side. Think of the last time you were angry. Why were you angry? I don't remember. Though I know I was mad recently. How long has it been since you had sex? Almost four years. Who was the last person to call you babe? Sara. Last reason you went to the ER? My sister got in a car wreck. Have you ever taken pictures in a photo booth? Yeah. When was the last time you shaved your legs? It's been maaaany months. What facial cleanser do you use? Biore. Do you use a blowdryer? No. If someone wanted to know what you smelt like, what should they smell? Dogs and cats lmao. Have you ever cheated on the significant other that you have now? No. For that one week a month, do you hate being a woman? Still rather be a woman. Favorite underwear brand? Idk. Last thing you bought at the mall? A book. Do your parents like your boyfriend/girlfriend? Yes. What if an ex asked to be back in your life? Aaron: We've never had issues, we just drifted apart. It'd be weird for him to ask that, but I mean, sure? Juan: I don't know. Probably not. Jason: I REALLY don't know. We could probably be friends at a distance. Tyler: No, I think. Girt: He's still in my life. If you’re on a laptop, how much charge does it have right now? It's charging and only tells me the minutes until it's at full charge. Last gift you received? I don't know. Lesson you recently learned? I absolutely cannot work in a busy environment. What is your favorite condiment to go with french fries? Probably ketchup. What is a field of study that is of your interest? Zoology. What do you have a habit of doing when engaging in a conversation with someone? Thinking too hard on what the appropriate amount of eye contact is. Have you ever laid in a hammock? Yeah. What time of day do you feel mostly at peace? Morning. How has the weather been treating you lately? It's way too fucking hot and humid. Have you ever lost a pet in a tragic way? How did you cope? We've had numerous cats be hit by cars. It was always sad, but I mean, I got through it. Especially as I was just a kid and didn't quite fathom how serious death was, nor did any cats I was SUPER attached to die that way. What can you go a day without doing? Going outside. What can’t you go a day without doing? Using some form of technology. Talking to Sara. Who do you spend most of your time with? No one. I'm usually alone. Do you have a favorite classical composer? No. What type of quality is a must-have in a friend? A caring heart. Have you ever eaten a zucchini? A fried one that was sliced into chips. What type of art would you hang up in your room? Dark art or fandom-related stuff. What goes good with a nice cold glass of milk? Oreos omggggg. What fruit is too sweet to you? None, I think? How much money did your last vacation cost? I don't even remember my last vacation. Have you ever taken a physics class? Yeah. What are your thoughts on celebrity idolization and ‘fangirling/fanboying?’ Oh boy, I can't talk shit here for obvious reasons lmao. What is the messiest area in your home? I'm not sure... I haven't been in my sister's old room in forever, and I can't remember if it's empty or not. If it is empty - hell, even if it isn't -, the answer's probably the laundry room. Who was the last person you called? My mom. What’s your favorite computer game genre? Horror is my favorite game genre period. Do you have any exes your parents never liked? No. Well, Mom had mixed feelings about Juan, but so did I. She didn't not like him, though. Do you take public transportation to work? N/A. Public transport doesn't even come here. What extracurricular activities did you do when you were growing up? Soccer for one season (I hated it), softball, basketball, briefly cheerleading, and dance. Has anything unusual happened to you recently? Idk. I don't think so. Do you like chicken korma? I have no clue what that is. What was the last type of tea you drank? I never drink tea; I hate it. Have you ever been severely mentally ill? Yes. Where is the most interesting place you could go that’s within day-trip distance from your house? Stealing previous answer: Washington D.C. Do you ever rearrange your furniture? No. Have you received financial help from your parents in the past 5 years? Lol I'm still financially dependent on them. Are you a fast or a slow eater? I am an extremely fast eater. I'm not messy or anything, I just, eat how I feel is normal? Just chew until you've done so enough to swallow. What room(s) of your house did you last vacuum? Mine. How old were you when you had your first relationship? My first "real" relationship started at 15. I had a middle school bf for just like... a month or so, but that was all puppy-dog love. Why did your last relationship end? I verified that I didn't like him romantically, and I also found I was just too guarded. In our four months of dating, I got no closer to him than I was from the start. I wasn't ready to date a guy again. What was the last thing you purchased from a small local business? No idea. Is there anyone in your family/household whom you frequently argue with? No. Do you live in a high cost-of-living area? No. Have you ever used chewing tobacco? Ew, no. Do you ever feel like someone would be disappointed to see your body or are you comfortable with your body enough where you don’t think that? I fucking hate my body and I'm sure anyone else would too. What is your favorite flavor of Monster? I don't like Monster. Do you follow your head or your heart? Both, I guess. It depends. How do you act under pressure? Did somebody say PANIC?!?!?!?! Do you ever call people just to hear the sound of their voice? No. Do you ever look back at your yearbooks? No. It'd probably depress me. Have you ever ran from the police? No. Have you ever written on someone’s face in your yearbook? Ha ha yeah, back as a kid... Are you double jointed? No. Who was the last person to yell at you? Mom. What is your favorite stuffed animal that you own? My first stuffed meerkat I named after Zaphod from MM. Or my moose Brownie. Do you have any trophies? Somewhere. Do you work out? No. What grade are you in? I’m not in school. Do you like screamo music? No. Let me hear words, please. If I learn the lyrics, I can /sometimes/ enjoy the song, though. What does your wallet look like? It's rectangular with a Harley Quinn design. Do you have any hickeys on you? No. Is weed a drug? *Technically*, by definition, yes Who’s the first person you turn to when you need a shoulder to cry on? Mom or Sara. Would you cheat on someone for revenge? Or if they wouldn’t find out? No, that's fucking stupid. If you got pregnant right now, would you keep the baby? If I was, God forbid, raped, I don't think I could. If I had unprotected sex willingly, I truly think pregnancy would traumatize me, but I'd probably go through with it and put it up for adoption. I'd want to take responsibility for my actions. Does your family have a secret? No. Are you prejudice against any groups of people? No. If someone gave you a houseplant, would you keep it? Yeah, to be nice. That fella wouldn't live long, though. When/where are you most likely to sing? In the car. Are there any exercises that you do regularly? I'm trying to get in the habit of planking every day since it works out your whole body. Would you ever wish to explore a cave? HELL YES!!!! If you had a son right now, what would you name him? Probably Damien. Who names their son after a Markiplier character? Me. But real talk, I like the name. Do you own a desktop or a laptop? A laptop. Have you kissed more than three guys this year? I haven't kissed any guys. Who’s with you? Mom's on the couch outside my door. Can you use chopsticks? I highly doubt it, especially because I have tremors. When did you last go to an amusement park? Oh, wow. I actually think this was shortly before Jason and I broke up. So 2015. Are there certain things that can’t be joked about with you? Don't you fucking dare joke about rape, retardation, suicide, or self-harm. What would you do if you had a baby with the last person you kissed? We're both females. We can't. Your phone is ringing. It’s your ex. What do you say? I don't have any of my exes' numbers, so I'd answer it and say "hello?". Are any of your texts in your inbox locked? A couple from Sara. If there were no letters on the keys on your keyboard, could you still type? Yes; I don't look at the keyboard when I type. Have you ever dated someone longer than a year? Twice now. Do you currently have a scar? I have a lot. Have you ever seen somebody get shot? No. You have $5 and need to buy snacks at a petrol station. What do you buy? I mean, it depends on what I'm up for. Usually Reese's or something sour. If you were reincarnated as a sea creature, what would you want to be? Probably a dolphin. What do you order most off the internet? Clothes. Describe the last time you were injured? So I have this awful habit of tearing my fingernails when they get long, and I peeled it way too short. Rock concert or symphony? Y'all know I'm picking rock. What is the wallpaper of your mobile phone? Mark and Chica, and my home screen is Sara and me. Most recent movie you’ve watched at the cinema? Detective Pikachu. Name an actor/actress you’ve had the hots for? Jason Momoa. My straight side is certainly still there, friends. What’s your favorite kind of cake? Red velvet. Do you untie your shoes when you take them off? No. Have you ever eaten snow? Yeah. Have you ever done ballet? No. Do you listen to classical music? No. Do you watch Spongebob? I don't watch TV period. Do people consider you intelligent? Those in my life seem stuck on high school me, when I was really smart. I don't think I am anymore. What curse word do you use the most? "Fuck," oops. Would you ever date someone covered in tattoos? Well yeah, I'm probably gonna BE that person one day, lmao. What’s the way people most often mispronounce any part of your name? It's impossible to mispronounce my name... The only thing that sometimes happens is my name is misspelled.
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