#the grip this woman has on me

[the-drow-fucker]

Orin dancing in the Sharess Caress

[akaika]

This took me almost a month to finish...

[wqxianvents]

// CONTAINS COMMENTARY AND PICTURES OF TEARS OF THEMIS NEW EVENT: “ENDURING LIGHT.”

This is only the Prologue section I talk about in this one, aha and I ALRWDY HAVE SM TO TALK ABTR

first of all, another group event of course, you love to see it and they’re being dorks but in a cooler way already 💃 also btw happy new year!! hope it’s been treating y’all well already :]<3

okay so i’m going into this event basically being sus of everyone at this point LMAO, i don’t even trust our boys tbh - anything could happen and i’m excited! everytime there’s a big event i always am like “ugh… not another one i have to drain energy into and it isn’t even that interesting” (respectfully). like the last one on the train? i didn’t really care much about it, the only things that interested me were nxx being all up on eachother (exaggerating)

basically i prepare myself to be disappointed, which might sound messed up but tbh the events have only been hittin recently (for me) because of the fact that they’re not having nxx be at eachother’s throats lol. (not saying the past ones weren’t good though and that none of the recent ones were a miss bc again, i didnt fully enjoy the train event)

this one already had me though 😭 got me gagged, the ui is so fucking cool - the card system?? the OUTFITS make me wanna CHOMP my phone (esp luke’s… smth- smth abt it is just. hm, delectable). also baby davis always appearing is so cute his little “hello, miss… uh, i mean, little boss!” LMAO that is my son!!!

ANYGAYS we always have to start off with Marius talking about something going on ‘round town, intended to invite his lovely lady but of course the boys have to interrupt and say hey, where is our invitation??? 🤗 you love to see it

jxjddh “i didn’t ask you guys” LMFAO HE IS SO DONEEE - artem, vyn: “oh really? let me hit you with this comeback. give me my invitation.”, like why are they so angy ARENT YALL RICH? GET YOUR OWN INVITATION 😭😭 i just adore the difference here though like, luke is the one purely excited here and not just “oh, aha, trying to get alone with rosa? how about: no.” but vyn is like 😭 “okay, shit, thanks for the invitation, marius.”

ARTEM MINDING HIS OWN BUSINESS BY HIS COMPUTER AND DECIDING TO INSERT HIMSELF INTO THE CONVERSATIONNN. they’re silly billies.

of course we needed our typical marluke banner 🥺

“Without us, who would you team up with?” did he just call marius friendless or can i also mix that with delulu poly nxx and add a hint of, “bitch who else are you planning to invite? we are RIGHT here” LMFAO

“Luke, are things at work slow lately?” 😭😭😭 i have tears in my eyes u were gonna invite him anyway shut up

i want a group event where the guys don’t butt in just to see if marius invites them anyway HAAHSJS like he just has the stuff ready for the boys just in case they butt in again, but one time they don’t and he’s just confused 😭

kicking my feet, he loves them all dearly. they’re my babies, my lil ol family!!

ANYWAYS… we’re here. Li Hotel 🤨 && again, the wayyy i was entranced with everything omg obsessed obsessed. BY THE WAY i already suspect that the letter-friend is reporter pearce 🤨🤨 don’t ask me for proper reasoning besides the fact that they reveal the letter-friend is a guy LMAO

&& shares the same life goal (wanting to travel around the world) as little boss 😔💜 but who knows…

alright last two things ✨ nxx boys lowkey teasing rosa by being in character HAHAHDJ (NOT ME POSTING THE WEONG PICTURE AND MAKING MYSELF SAD)

same, rosa, same 😭 (and the invitation card?? zoo wee mama- the way that marius was the only one who kept his eyes on rosa thoughhj hejeejnffk GRRR. okay sorry. NAUR and the luke stare 😔 marluke strikes my heart once again!!! WHY IS VYN ALL THE WAY UP THERE BTW)

anyways. last but not least, this isn’t technically apart of the prologue but it’s when Davis takes you on a little tour as always to show you the event and there is one part where you can have discussions with the boys. you click on luke by default but the first conversation option you have, he talks about this:

&& this actually made me tear up pretty bad 😭 then i had a whiplash and went “OHH THE FUCKING CARD” LMFAOO,, LIKE WHY WOULD HYV DO THIS TO ME 😞 i love the parallels luke always has with his au cards though ugh, makes me depressed in the right way(??)

like his birthday card (the name is itching my brain, i can’t remember) and in his bday event there was a mirror and sword (i believe) that appeared 😔 now this… sobbing throwing up, do NOT TOUCH ME

ARE YOU TELLING ME HE ACTUALLY DIES IN THE CARD STOOFPFPFDB??? THAT HE DOESN’T SAY HE LOVES HER? WHAT IS THIS. punching the floor. DO THEY ALL DIE? I THOUGHT ARTEM AT LEAST LIVES…. AM I MIXING UP CARDS…. see what this event is doing to me already 😔

ojay. i’m done here, had to write the thoughts out brrr, imma go finish reading the event now 🌚 toodles (unless u can read the vyn spoiler below)

HUGE CARD SPOILERS BELOW: VYN [MEDIEVAL SUSPENSE]

OHHbajdhd and adding on why I’m not trusting anyone - even our boys - in this event is because this event reminds me too much of a card that Vyn has. A group of folks in this card are acting and Vyn’s character ended up being the killer. I won’t leave my thoughts on the card but this is why I’m sus of everyone 😔

[androxys]

I read Madeline Miller’s Galatea on my lunch break today, and I want to give it a re-read and then post some more thoughts about it, but I just want to say one quick thing. Within the opening pages of the short story, I could not help but think over and over of Perkins’ The Yellow Wallpaper, and I’ve been thinking about the difference in what liberation--if that is the word to be used--is portrayed as for these two women.

[iactuallykissedsharawheeler]

"i wonder if my crush knows i like her?"

me when she's speaking, breathing, and existing in any proximity to me:

[cleoselene]

CAUSE THERE WERE PAGES TURNED WITH THE BRIDGES BURNED, EVERYTHING YOU LOSE IS A STEP YOU TAKE, SO MAKE THE FRIENDSHIP BRACELETS, TAKE THE MOMENT AND TASTE IT, YOU GOT NO REASON TO BE AFRAID

[everythingmp3]

being adult Vans controversially young gf headcanons

(sfw + nsfw)

I’ve had this in my drafts for a while and thought I’d just put it out there in honor of those new pics of her that surfaced earlier! some things were alluded to/mentioned in my fics for her, I just wrote down whatever came to mind, this is purely for fun, so here u go <3

sfw:

she was definitely nervous as hell during your first date, like to a degree where she almost felt sick because she was so into you. which you used to your advantage: touching her hand during the conversation and batting your eyelashes at her, tilting your head and smiling, all of it, so you could watch her get increasingly flustered

in general you have her wrapped around your finger, she’s utterly defenseless against the effect you have on her and she can’t deny that she loves it, how weak you make her feel

there is a distinct best friend dynamic that only adds to your compatibility as lovers, whenever something crazy or funny happens to you during the day you always think "i can´t wait to tell her about this later”, you could talk for hours on end and still have things to say to each other

she constantly makes fun of you for being on your phone too much. whenever she catches you sitting somewhere scrolling aimlessly she teases the fuck out of you for it, she’ll make you show her your screen time to say shit like “do you see that? 5 hours down the drain”

she does not get off on the age gap, it just happened to be larger, but you love to joke about it to piss her off.. like when she tells you a story from ten years ago and you drop a casual “while you were doing that, I was still in school”, and she usually shuts it down with a “stop! that’s horrible!” but secretly she enjoys it when you mess with her

she is not obvious with her jealousy, sometimes she even enjoys seeing women flirt with you (when it´s not too obnoxious), she likes showing you off but! what makes her absolutely livid is when a woman close to her age has the audacity to do it��younger women are fine but if some older woman eyes you up and down it´s over. she gives them the death stare and pulls you closer or kisses you

and men. let’s just say any man who has the guts to stare at you or hit on you when she´s there is leaving that interaction scarred for life (not literally but spiritually for sure)

your favorite random act of affection is kissing her her face. you take advantage of the fact that she doesn’t wear makeup up and kiss her cheeks or temple or nose whenever you feel like it; her go to affectionate thing is pulling you close from behind and just holding you like that for a few seconds, her head resting on your shoulder

Van is tough, she usually keeps her cool, but the one thing that makes her panic is seeing you in physical pain, especially when you cry or god forbid sob in front of her. it shatters her heart because she wants to fix it immediately and hates knowing that she can’t just magically take the pain away from you, but she knows exactly how to comfort you, holding you and tending to you with patience

you’re always her number one priority. if you’re having a rough day she’ll close the store early so she can go upstairs with you and comfort you, she won’t even let you protest bc it’s not a discussion to her, in general she takes it very seriously when you’re going through depressive moods, she’s a silly person but that humor vanishes when she senses that you’re actually not doing well

over the years her ptsd has gotten better but it’s still there in some ways, and one thing that she noticed is that her nightmares became way less frequent since you started sleeping in the same bed. and even when she does have them, they’re much easier to bear when she wakes up and sees you laying there next to her. in general you both opened up to each other a lot about issues you never told anyone about before

she became your personal chauffeur very quickly after you started dating (even if you have your own car, doesn´t matter), she likes the chivalry of it, so if you´re at a friend´s place and it’s gotten late or you leave a concert late at night, you won´t have to walk or take public transport or an uber bc she will be there, waiting down the street to pick you up <3

cinema dates, obviously. and I think you definitely discuss the films you saw all the way home afterwards and get wrapped up in heated discussions when you have differing opinions, when you like certain actors that the other person doesn´t, etc. (her getting kinda jealous when you think that an actress close to her age is hot, you asking her “be honest, would you?” about the younger ones. or if you both find someone hot you joke about inviting them to be your third)

I think being with a younger partner whom she feels protective over would make her more romantic, she´d catch herself saying things like "my sweet angel" or "my heart" to you in a dreamy tone and think what the fuck did I just call her... because she´s not used to being so dramatic with her affection but you love it bc it´s clearly very genuine

after a while of dating you convinced her to let you be big spoon sometimes and you love it, just burying your face in her neck, wrapping your arms around her and dozing off like that.

she’s a hugeee baby when she’s sick, whenever she catches a light cold she acts like she’s on the brink of death (and maybe she plays it up a little bc she likes when you coddle her and give her all of your attention)

even though she’s older than you, she’s definitely not much more mature and it’s kinda funny to you that someone over 40 has the vibe of a teenager at times and you make sure to tease her about it (like her atrocious eating habits that slowly got better once you started seeing each other)

you hang around the store sometimes, helping her out here and there, keeping her company, and you loveee how jealous some regular customers of hers get who clearly have a crush on her. you make a point of calling her “babe” or “my love” or other terms of endearment in front of them, kissing her, touching her, and just watching them pretend they aren´t bothered by it

it makes sense to me that her love of vintage film stuff also extends to photography, so I’m sure she has a film camera that she takes with her whenever you go out together, especially when you’re in nature or in a different city (she sneakily takes beautiful candids of you bc she knows you’d tell her to stop if she put the camera right in your face too often)

you´re the kind of couple that silently judges other people with just a shared look, whenever someone acts a fool around you, you just grin at each other while suppressing the multitude of jokes you both could come up with in the moment, saving them for later when you can debrief and laugh

you’re a very domestic couple, you love going out for dinner etc. but you definitely enjoy being homebodies together, nothing is better to you than coming home to each other after a long day and spending the rest of the evening on the couch or in bed together <3 (she loves when you fall asleep with your head in her lap, something about it is so endearing to her)

you sometimes introduce her to some lesbian pop culture bc she’s so out of the loop and she usually pretends like she doesnt care for it but then a few days later you catch her watching the film or listening to the song that you recommended to her

I also think she might “ironically” watch lesbian dating shows with you and develop some very strong opinions once she gets into it, she’d be so serious about it and you’d end up watching her while she watches the TV bc her reactions are more entertaining to you (you’d also probably have to explain a good amount of slang to her that the contestants use, her turning to you and asking things like what the fuck is a “situationship?”)

you’re a huge gift giver with her her! whenever you see a shirt in a store that she might like you just get it, same with little things like her favorite flowers or preferred drinks, you always think of her even when she’s not with you and it’s one of the things that makes her feel deeply loved by you

she´s obsessed with your scent. almost in a primal way, she can´t get enough.. a big reason of why she lets you steal all of her clothes is so that they end up smelling like you (she also definitely has a thing for perfume/cologne, she loves when the scent lingers on her bedsheets or when she hugs you and smells it, it’s addictive to her)

you got into the habit of tracing her scars whenever she’s sitting close and talking to you and it always makes her melt, feeling your fingertips on her cheek, it’s impossible for her to feel less attractive bc of the scars in those moments

nsfw: 

submissive. cannot emphasize this enough. there is nothing dominant about Van, yes she can take charge and be aggressive, but even when she tops, she does not want to make you bend to her will, her priority is always to give you what you need she’s not the mean dom type, wrong address

any order you give is immediately taken. nothing is more gratifying to her than feeling like she´s giving you exactly what you need and more. exceeding expectations is her goal, always, so the nights where you cum multiple times are her favorite

she´s definitely into being overpowered/dominated. with an age difference I think the contrast of you being younger but manhandling her is unbearably hot to her, it drives her insane, she loves when you grab her all over or tear her clothes off or push her up against furniture/walls, when you mess her hair up and get all over her, when you kiss her so hard she has trouble breathing, I think deep down that´s all she really wants: to be wanted violently.

dirty talk. she loves whispering sweet things to you during sex because she knows that her voice gets to you every time, it’s a sure way for her to gain the upper hand, to talk to you while she’s pleasing you

tits person through and through. Van knows what she likes and she will never ever get tired of grabbing your tits when you’re making out or kissing/sucking them during sex, or just admiring them when you’re getting undressed or showering together

her other favorite part of your physique is your back. her hands always find their way under your shirt when you´re sitting or standing next to her, she loves caressing you and running her hand up and down your spine, during sex she also loves having her hands on your lower back when the position allows her to

definitely loves switching! she knows she´s gotten good at pleasing over the years and she loves to show off and make you feel good, but sometimes nothing turns her on more than seeing you get that look that tells her she’s about to be devoured.

morning sex. she’s an early riser and loves the soft, slow kind of intimacy that you share during those early hours- she loves it when you’re still half asleep while she goes down on you or touches you all over, gently, to wake you up, she looves how endearing you look/sound in those moments

period sex. she loves giving you head when you’re on your period bc it helps you with the pain and she secretly loves the primal feeling of it, makes her feel deeply connected to you (callback to her writing i love u on Tais arm, shes never been scared of blood)

high sex. I think Van definitely dabbles in weed and I think she loves how being high heightens all the sensations, so I can see you getting high together and just feeling each other up for hours, losing track of time, lazy slow sex that relaxes you, lots of laughing/giggling in between

degradation. nothing crazy, but it does turn her on when you get a bit mean with it, when you tease her about being too good for her, too young, etc. when you make her feel a bit pathetic, it is impossible for her not to feel hot all over when you playfully make her feel inferior bc deep down she does take pride in it, that she got you even though she feels like you´re a bit out of her league

definitely loves missionary, the intimacy of it, kissing while fucking is her thing, for the same reason she loves sitting upright when you ride her, kissing your neck, holding you tight, chest to chest, she’s definitely intense with it, needs to have that deep emotional component to really lose herself

hair pulling. anything to do with her hair is an easy way to get her to do whatever you want, in bed but not just there, and you love it, always running your hands through her hair when you hug or kiss. (nothing makes her fall asleep faster than feeling your fingertips on her scalp unless it turns her on too much and you have to finish what you started by targeting her one obvious weak spot)

finger sucking. once you figured that one out you were relentless about it, sometimes when she touches your face you instinctively open your mouth for her and it drives her insane

she´s sensitive as hell. her skin, her erogenous zones, all of it. it´s endearing to you how easy it is to get her aroused, sometimes accidentally brushing her nipples through her shirt leaves her having to recover for a few seconds, kissing her neck makes her lose her train of thought immediately, a hand on her thigh makes her wince, you love warmer seasons with her because of this, touching her exposed skin out in public to get her riled up before you go home

on that note I think she definitely needs to recover for at least a few minutes after an orgasm before she can go again because it’s that intense for her

also, overstimulation. to put it plainly: I think every once in a while she just wants to be fucked senseless by you. Van is prone to overthinking and worrying, so I think it is exactly what she needs sometimes, for you to tend to her needs until her mind is blank and she can only concentrate on you, how good you´re making her feel. and to you it´s deeply pleasing to see her lose herself to your touch, it’s fun for you to see just how far you can push her (which is pretty far. she´d let you do whatever you want in those moments)

big into sensuality! sometimes making out and feeling you press down on her fully clothed, grinding against her, the heavy breathing and heat of it all, is enough for her to feel satisfied; she likes getting worked up without always having it lead to sex, I can also see her being into edging (both on the receiving and giving end)

the only “violence” she indulges in during sex is leaving/receiving marks, anything like choking or or slapping you with too much force is out of the question, hard No for her, she´d rather let you do it to her.

on that note: biting. it really turns her on when you get possessive and bite her, her neck, her shoulders, her thighs during sex (she loves when she takes her clothes off and finds random bite marks) but even outside of the bedroom she loves when you randomly use teeth when you´re kissing her, or when you´re sitting together and you get the random urge to lightly bite her arm, sometimes she lovingly calls you her little vampire/animal

public sex. for example out in nature when it´s clear that nobody else is around (I mean, she’s had some practice with sex in the woods..)

she never got into toys on her own but one time when she was over at your place you swatted her hand away from your bedside drawer, which made her curious about what exactly it is that you use to masturbate - which lead to her using your vibrator on you and loving it, just holding it in place while watching you come undone (maybe it became part of your sex life, using it on each other or together)

lots of spontaneity, sometimes when you spend a Sunday inside in bed you might fuck a few times a day, other times when you´re tired and have a lot to do you might go a few days without it, it´s all very relaxed and intuitive 

she is obsessed with your moans. it´s the hottest thing in the world to her, sometimes she only wants to fuck to hear the sounds you make.

she´s never been into porn (if anything she can appreciate a good old vintage playboy) but! sometimes you watch a film that has a surprisingly good lesbian sex scene and forget about the film the second the scene is over because you got too turned on perhaps you end up recreating what you just saw

I could probably go on but I will leave it you to imagine more for her <3 (also I say gf but that´s just my perspective, this could all easily apply to a nonbinary reader too)

[rizzzcat]

My beautiful anarchist who did nothing wrong and is probably on a wanted poster.

[onlygingercats-crayon]

hey dogs. im coming back after faking a hiatus. i tried to leave this fucking website but after two days I caved in and checked the alyx vance tag oh my god

i cant live life without her i cant alyx help me im gping to another year of highschool hold my ahd help me help me dont leav me where alyx

and then i figured out theres a wearable tiger skull in half life alyx

[esmes]

i'm not gonna lie to y'all... i am not the same person i was before i noticed these little moments :'''''''''(

[ilikedetectives]

[wowiezowiebaby]

Sorry for drawing her so much it will happen again

[sneckoil]

idk what it is that blue zircon from steven universe did to me specifically

[shopcat]

omfg people really need to calm the fuck down about people disliking some characters like it's not always a deep seated prejudice or an inability to empathise it's because we are human beings with our own experiences and normal biases and fictional characters are not real and it doesn't matter if you don't like them for pretty much any reason at all and doesn't make you suddenly x just because the character is y it just means you don't like them. obviously other indications of actual prejudice or a repeated pattern mean something else entirely but you can just dislike a character because get this they're a character and not a real person. you can dislike real people too even it's almost like we've got free will. please oh please can we get out of the torture chamber together.

[clementinesmustyhat]

i love jane so much y’all it’s not even funny