#the lip bite. um okay miss bella swan

[gordonsicedcoffee]

LEIGH WHANNELL as DAVID CRUSH (2013) dir. Malik Bader

[xetswan]

Youngest Shadow- Confirming Us

One | two | three | four | five | six | seven

Bella stands by me, getting herself ready for what she’s about to do. It’s the end of the school day and I suck in a deep breath for her. I can not believe she’s actually going through with this.

She starts walking towards the Cullen’s. She makes eye contact with Edward and he immediately gets the message but Rosalie grabs his arm. Bella already disappeared in the trees that bordered the school property. Rosalie says something to him but Alice shakes her head and removes her hand, also speaking. I obviously can’t hear them from here.

Biting the dead skin off my bottom lip nervously I try my best not to cough. Of course I’m still sick, not as bad as yesterday but still up there. Just without the fever.

I watch Edward finally get away from his foster siblings and go to my sister. It feels like my breathing has been shortened. I have a feeling he won’t do anything to her but there’s always a thought in the back of my mind.

“Hey, you okay?” I turn and it was just Angela. “Hm?” I raise a brow. “Oh I was just asking if you’re okay. Since you were pretty sick yesterday.” She smiles, putting her hand on my back causing me to shutter. “I’m better, still sick.” I look away to cough. Her touch makes my chest squeeze and I don’t notice the two staring at me from across the lawn. Or at least I act like I don’t.

“Aw, I’m sorry.” She pouts moving her hand to my shoulder and I nervously laugh. “It’s okay, did you find your prom dress?” I change the subject, her eyes light up in response. “Yes I did. Did you? I wasn’t able to ask since you were so bad yesterday.” She takes her hand back and I felt like a corset was being taken off and I could actually breathe again. “Ah, that’s amazing. I don’t know if I’m going.” I shrug.

She takes my hand and that one feeling comes back. “You have to it will be so fun. And since we don’t have Bella coming we need at least one Swan sister to come.” She tries to convince me. That sentence throws me the wrong way though, I know she didn’t intend it to but I don’t know.

“We could even match colors. My dress is like light pink.”

“I mean if you’d like me to I will.” I tell her with a small smile. “Light pink is such a good choice.” Another voice rings to my right side and both of us jump from the person. I mentally curse once I see who it is. “Oh, um… thank you Alice.” Angela grins at the other girl as I glare at her.

“So, [Name] how’d you sleep last night?” She turns to me and my lips press together angrily. Angela seems confused.

“What an odd question to ask.” I say through my teeth.

“Really? I just wanted to make sure it was nice since Jasper and I left before you woke up.” She sweetly says, my eyes widen.

“I slept fine.” I roll my eyes.

“That’s good! Angela? That’s your name right? I’m going to steal [Name] here for a second.” She doesn’t even let the girl answer nor give me the chance to deny. Taking my arm and dragging me away. I look back at Angela apologetically.

She waves me goodbye, furrowing her eyebrows as she was just as confused as me.

We get into a car where I’m in the backseat, Jasper was in the driver seat. “What was that!?” I pull away from her, my face scrunched with anger.

“Shh.” She tells me and I grunt as I push myself backwards on the seat. “Is this a fucking AA or something? Here to tell each other secrets?” I cross my arms.

“Why are you so mad at us, darling?” Jasper turns to look at me.

“Why are you so obsessed with me?” I rebuttal.

“Well, you obviously know what we are is that your reason?” He ignores what I had just said. “No I’m just- I’m confused!” I exclaim.

“You’re both together, in a relationship. Immortal I might add that I am not. What do you want from me?”

Their gazes soften. “[Name], you’re our missing piece. You’re ours. You have been for years we only now found you.” Alice tells, still smiling. I think back to my dream.

Their missing piece…

“You still aren’t answering me correctly. Give me an explanation, a good one that doesn’t sound like you’re crazy!” I exasperated.

“I’m some missing piece, whatever! But why me? You don’t know me!” I hold myself trying not to get emotional from how overwhelmed I feel.

“We know more than you think, love.” Jasper says, i glance over to him, motioning for him to keep talking.

“We’ve had this feeling for years, we knew you as humans, [Name]. Years and years ago. You’re the one who would get through our fingers. Your past lives have popped up. And they will continue to do so until you fall for us. You won’t remember until you-“ he cuts himself off, Alice’s eyes bored onto me. “You won’t remember.”

I sit there for a minute in complete silence.

Then I start laughing. “Okay I played into this for a little bit. I actually believed it, I believed my sister too! Is this some sort of prank or something?” I shake my head. “This is good, really. You had me. But knock it off.” I go to open the door but it won’t open.

“Hey, let me out.” I play with the handle and the two just sit there. “I said let me out.” I order, now using to hands.

“[Name],” Alice goes to touch me but I go up against the door. “Don’t touch me.” I smack her away from me and a shock goes through my arm. I gasp not only from how cold she is, even though I already know she is. But something actually shocked me. Not a normal metal shock but like a taser went through my arm.

“We’re telling the truth.” Jasper says lowly, I just scoff.

“Okay, sure and I’m a fucking werewolf. Do you know how crazy this sounds!?” I throw my hands into the air.

“Yes, yes we know.” Alice sadly replied.

“I want proof.” I simply say. “I want to see the speed shit or whatever.”

They look between each other, nodding.

“We can do that but we have to go to an excluded place. Do you trust us enough?” Alice asks me. I sit there for a moment.

“Sure.”

“We need a yes if we leave this parking lot.”

I roll my eyes, “yes.”

And in a quick notion we’re on the road, exhilarating passed the speed limits.

I grip onto the handle above me.

Then we come to a stop, we’re in the forest. “We gotta do some walking.” Jasper warns me, I just nod.

He finally unlocks the child lock he had put on and I get out. I leave my backpack inside the vehicle. Alice and Jasper stand next to me on either side. We start up on this hike trail. We walk in silence. None of us tried to start up a conversation.

“Watch your step.” Jasper warns me and even with that warning I somehow trip. Luckily I don’t fall. My face warms up in embarrassment. They don’t say anything, don’t even crack a smirk or anything. Sort of making me feel better about it.

Then Jasper starts going off trail and I stop in place. “What are you doing?”

“Excluded place, remember, Darling?” Jasper reminds me, I look around trying to think of a way to get out of this. “Right.” I whisper, realizing there isn’t going to be one. I buried my own grave here.

“I’ll be right behind you to make sure you don’t fall.” Alice tells me, trying to reassure me.

I don’t acknowledge what she said, just following Jasper.

It was long until we get to this small spot. “No one’s around.” Alice tells Jasper who nods shortly.

My nerves start rising, I play with the sleeves of my sweater.

“Okay do you have anything else to ask?” Jasper asks and I shake my head. “Just do the speed shit.” I tell trying not to sound panicked but that doesn’t work.

He snickers and Alice stands next to him. Then he’s gone and I feel a tap on my shoulder. When I turned he was gone again. I look straight and Alice was gone too. A tap on my back this time and they’re both behind me. I squint at them and then Jasper is gone again. Now hanging on a tree branch.

Alice grins.

He jumps down, it was a high branch so I gasp. Almost going to run to him but he stands with perfect posture.

“Do you believe it now?” Alice teases me, my mouth opens to speak but nothing comes out. “I… I um”

“Are you scared?” Jasper questions me, going back next to his lover.

“Would you be in my position?”

The two laugh. “Yeah, we would.” Alice sighs.

“Well, oddly enough I’m not. I want to know more.” I tell them.

And for the next few days that’s what we do. I learn more about them.

Barely passing by Bella but we both subconsciously knew that each other got our answers.

And with learning about them came.. loving them. Both of them. I never thought I’d be with two people- vampires?

I guess no one thinks they will be with a vampire.

I knew I’d be in a relationship no one would understand in my family. Like being with a woman most likely. But in this odd polyamory love affair I would’ve never guessed.

They were gentle with me. Like a doll.

“Jasper usually has trouble around humans. That’s why he kind of looks like he’s in pain. But with you. It’s like you’re one of us. We still have to treat you with fragile care. Nonetheless you’re made for us.” Alice grins, holding my hand as we walked together on that same trail. Jasper had to help Rosalie and Emmett with something so he couldn’t join us today.

“Do you think there’s something with my blood?” I look at her and she gives me a confused look. “What do you mean?”

“Well you guys drink blood. What’s so different about mine?”

She breaks out into a small laugh. “Nothings different it’s just how we are with you. It’s been like that in all of your lifetimes. It’s how we know it’s you. Well we normally know because you always look the same. Same first name too.” She explains, my mouth going into the form of an ‘o’.

“You’re cute.” She gently bumps into me.

And no matter how many times I ask them about my past lives, about how I acted they never answered.

Always saying “you’ll find out when you do.”

It was very frustrating.

“I can see into the future, visions. I can see what a persons up to at this very moment. The future can change though. It’s not always accurate.” Alice tells me and I raise an eyebrow.

“Did you know about Bella and your brother before they came about?” I tilt my head.

“Sort of. I didn’t want to pry.” She says. “Can you do anything special?” I turn to Jasper.

“I can manipulate your emotions. Sort of like an empathetic person. I feel your emotion instead of you.” He explains.

I tilt my head, wanting to know more.

“How come you didn’t do that to me when I was angry with you guys?”

“I didn’t want to have this relationship based off of me manipulating you. I wanted you to feel everything, think for yourself. Make your choice. You’re worth waiting a million years for.” He takes me hand like Alice is but takes it up and kisses it.

I smile to myself, glancing down at the ground.

“We want you to come over and meet everyone.” Alice suddenly says.

“Your sister will be there too.” She adds.

I blink a few times, my chest tightening. “Uh… are you sure?”

“Of course.” Jasper chimes in.

And I felt like throwing up.

The thought of meeting their family made my heart thump quicker than normal.

“Okay… I’ll do it if my sister is there.”

“Great, we will pick you up tomorrow.”

Today I brought my motorcycle myself this time. So I drove home myself. And getting there Jacob and Billy stood outside talking to my dad. Well Billy sat in the car as Jacob was going to get out. I’m guessing to take out the wheelchair.

Getting off my bike, I take my helmet off as I walked over to them. “Hey, squirt!” My dad shouts over to me and I wave.

“Hey guys!” I smile. Jacob comes over and pulls me into a hug. Billy was a bit standoffish but he smiles and greets me as well.

Jacob walks away and goes to set up the wheelchair, Billy gets himself up to sit in it.

That’s when Bella gets dropped off by Edward, Billy and him make eye contact and Billy seemed nervous.

Okay this chapter is a little shorter than normal. I had some things happen so I’ve been busy. But I’m hoping to have two chapters out on Sunday.

And a few requests done.

[iamtwilighttrash]

My Breaking Dawn

*warnings: mention of sex, minor cursing  

(Stephenie Meyer owns this series and it’s characters)

Chapter Two

Jacob dropped me back home at 7:30. The sky had begun to change from overcast blue to a muted pink, and together we watched from my small front porch as the sunset blossomed.

“You have fun tonight, Bells. I mean it. I’ll see you tomorrow!” He was eager to go to the Bachelor Party— I could see the anticipation shining in his eyes. He turned to rush off but I gripped his sleeve, stopping him in his tracks.

“Our last normal human day and I don’t even get a hug goodnight? Asshole.” Thoroughly chastised, he grinned and ducked his head before swooping me up in a crushing bear hug.

“Sorry, Bella. Love you like crazy.” I laughed when, at last, I was able to breathe again.

“Love you too, Jake. Get outta here you crazy wolf,” I teased, sticking my tongue out. He rolled his eyes but jogged to his bike. I was barely inside the house when the engine roared to life and he was tearing down the street.

“Was that Jake?” My dad’s voice, so close, startled me so much that I nearly jumped through my skin.

“Agh! Dad!” Charlie, soda in hand, leaned against the entryway to the kitchen and patted my head as I scowled at him. “Why are you still home?” He had made arrangements to stay over at Billy’s so that my party could take place at our house; Alice had nearly hugged him off his feet when he’d grudgingly agreed. 

“Sorry, Bells,” he said gruffly. “I just wanted to make sure that you got here safe, wasn’t tryin’ to give you a heart attack.” There was a little smile peeking on the corner of his mouth. I rolled my eyes, but felt deeply touched by the notion that he had wanted to make sure I made it safely.

“It’s okay. Yeah, that was Jake. He swung by the Cullens earlier to, er, spend time with me before I...got married.” But it was so much more than that. Soon, I would no longer be human. Neither Jake nor I knew what the future would hold after I was turned. 

“Well, I hope you too had a nice time. I know you promised me this before, but I just wanted to make sure that tonight-” 

“No drinking, no strippers, no damage?” I teased. Charlie reddened, all too easy to embarrass, and I giggled in passing as I veered towards to fridge. It was dinnertime for the human. Imagining that in Edward’s voice made me smile bigger in remembrance, and then blush at the thought of what was soon to come. Silly, silly girl. Ruled by your hormones. After rummaging through the fridge, I turned to assemble a grilled cheese and tomato soup. Comfort food. Comfort food for the fear of my wedding, but also to ease the anxiety of the party Alice was about to subject me too. Charlie watched me as I methodically sliced cheese, oiled a pan, and butter bread. 

“Do ya think you could make me one of those to go?” I flashed him a grin. 

“Going to miss having me around to cook?” 

“A little.” He seated himself at the table. The realization hit me hard; this was it. This was the last time I would be human, eating dinner with my father in his shabby kitchen. I would no longer be able to hug him without wanting to kill him. 

My dad, my biggest supporter, and he would have to fear for his life around me.

“Bells, what’s the matter?” The tomato soup was started to scald to the pan. I quickly moved to stir it. 

 “Just nervous.” With my back turned, I hoped he could accept the lie. 

“Bella.” The firmness made me turn to look at him, our eyes locked. “I know I might not have acted the right way, you know, when you first told me. But I...” Both of our cheeks were on fire. The pregnancy accusation. “I want you to know that I’m happy you’re marrying Edward. When I see you look at each other, well,” he got a sad look on his face, and swiped a hand through his hair, “I remember how I used to feel when I looked at your mom.” My vision blurred through surprised tears. “Me and your mom didn’t work out, but I know what it feels to be in love. And you’re not like me, Bells, or her. You’re strong, and determined, and if you and Edward have a problem you’ll fight to fix it. He’s different too. I can tell...well, aside from when I almost killed him for running off... that he’s going to be a good man to you. I just wanted you to know that.”

I walked over, bent down to hug him tight. I had not spent enough time hugging Charlie; I knew that now that my human life would soon be over. But, I resolved to not feel guilt, and instead served up our grilled cheese, listened to my father talk about his day, and spent a few precious last moments with someone I loved. 

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Angela threw her pillow towards Alice in disbelief, shocked but giggling at the question. Alice feigned an OUCH! at the pillow’s impact, and cast me a sly wink. I was flushing just as hard as Angela, and the question hadn’t even been directed towards me. 

“Alice! So not fair to put me on the spot like!” 

“Asking if you and your long-time boyfriend have had sex is not an unfair question! It’s a Bachelorette party!” Rosalie let out a little laugh as well, and Leah smirked from her perch on the arm of my love-seat. 

“Agh, alright. Yes. We have.” Everyone let out a girlish squeal of excitement. I was a little shocked; was I the only virgin I knew besides Edward? Not that virginity mattered much to me, but it was still a little surprising. I was no prude, and I fully accepted that people in high school had a lot of sex; I had heard all of the almost comical story of Jessica  losing her virginity to Mike, which Edward had complained about to me in his car after school-- The details were so much worse in her head, love. You have no idea how lucky you are. -- but I still had not heard about Angela and Ben. 

“How was it? When was it?” 

“About a month ago. And it was,” she gave us a lewd eyebrow wiggle, “phenomenal.” All of the other girls, myself included, let out obnoxiously loud laughs. “But enough about me. Bella.” Oh no. I knew it was coming. “What about you and Edward?” 

“Ah...well...we both decided to wait. Until after...marriage.” I had struggled for a moment, fumbling on the words. I thought that my skin was ablaze. 

“Oh man, I don’t know how you guys managed!” Alice teased. I gave her a look. Angela gripped my hand.

“Does that mean that tomorrow...the honeymoon...” As my cheeks darkened and I bobbed my head in a shy nod, Angela smiled. “That’s so romantic!”

“Nervous?” asked Rosalie. Her gentle fingers were busy braiding Leah’s shoulder-length hair, but both of them gave me their full attention. Leah was flipping through the pages of an old magazine that my dad kept on the coffee table. I knew she would rather be out in the woods, out with her pack, but the fact that she chose to be with me made my lips curl on their own accord.

“Rose...” I scolded, half-serious. She gave me an innocent look. I sighed, taking a sip of the soda to my left. The carbonation had all but evaporated, but the liquid soothed the dryness of my tongue. Soon, human food would mean nothing to me. I indulged in another watered down sip. “I guess...” I looked around. These were my friends. I had to stop being so embarrassed about sex when I was the one who had begged Edward to have it. “Yes. Yes, I’m nervous.”

“Don’t be,” said Leah. There was always a bite to her tone but I knew she meant the words with kindness.

“Yeah, Bella,” Alice scooted over to give me a one-armed hug; as always, the coolness of her body settled me. “You’ll be okay. I’ve packed some...um...helpful things in your suitcase.” The blush came rushing back with a vengeance. Angela guffawed into the crook of her elbow. Rosalie smirked, tying of Leah’s braids skillfully.

“Oh my God, Alice!”

“Oh, don’t panic Bella!” My almost-sister-in-law nudged me. “I can almost be certain you’ll thank me later.” The wink almost pushed me over the edge.

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It was hours later, alone in my own bed, that the true gravity of my situation hit me. I was about to be married woman, say goodbye to my human family and friends, lose my virginity, and become a vampire. Isabella Swan was being shredded to pieces and rebuilt: Bella Cullen. Beautiful, hopefully graceful, and bloodthirsty Bella Cullen, who could wrestle with mountain lions and play baseball during thunder storms and race werewolves. Newborn Bella Cullen, who would have bright red eyes and uncontrollable thirst.

Was I ready to say goodbye to Isabella Swan? Was I ready to walk away from my parents and Angela and possibly even Jacob?

On my desk, I could just make out the photograph of Edward and I that we had taken over summer. Even with my dull human senses, his beauty stood out in the darkness. My heart thumped.

Yes. Yes, I was ready. For an eternity with him, there was nothing I wouldn’t do.

[volturialice]

and thou art distant in Humanity

welcome to an edbella thing feat. vampire!bella and human!edward and a bookstore. it’s @cullen-collective‘s birthday request! title from Isabella, or the Pot of Basil by John Keats. 

rating: gen 

pairings: bella swan/edward cullen

length: 1.4k words 

part 1/2 

        Bella has never minded being alone. It’s being alone among other people she can’t seem to handle.

   This time it was Emmett’s fault, of course. Things often are. Sometimes Bella wonders whether the whole bear incident was as entirely unprovoked as her brother claims, because his ability to attract trouble is every bit as formidable as her own.

   Usually, it’s fine. It’s not as if you can get into too much trouble as an immortal, indestructible vampire. At least Emmett has just enough sense not to cross the Volturi or pick a fight with another coven. And he has Rose to keep him in line.

    And content as she is with solitude, sometimes Bella wonders what that would be like. She loves her family, but it would be nice to have someone who was all hers. Someone to hunt with, talk with, share with, spend eternity with. The usual stuff.

    And yes, all right, someone to have sex with. It’s awkward, having to sequester herself in the library all night every night until the others zip downstairs at dawn, all giggly and handsy or mellow and blissed out. Bella’s library is probably the most well-stocked and beautiful one in the country, but sometimes it feels more like a self-imposed prison than an escape. Still, she makes the best of it. Lonely cell or cozy burrow, it’s her space.

    Which is why it feels like such an affront when Emmett trespasses. Most of the time, Bella doesn’t mind being the perfect victim for his pranks—just stuffy enough to get offended, just cool enough to forgive. But Emmett can’t always tell when he crosses a line. Bella hides hurt feelings so well that probably no one can, except maybe Jasper. She doesn’t know why it’s so hard to admit when she’s been hurt—maybe some buried thing from her human life, an enduring desire to please everyone all the time, to never be a burden. That sounds about right for a girl from 1918.

    So she doesn’t say anything to Emmett about the ruined copy of Little Women. What would be the point? It’s not as if she can’t replace it. They’re billionaires, for crying out loud. She swallows back the little twinge of grief, the voice that protests, Renée bought me that book in 1909, a birthday present, we read it aloud to each other on summer evenings by the open window—and accepts the post-it note Alice hands her, with the address of the closest used bookstore—Masen’s Books—in elegant, looping scrawl.

    Bella should check it out, anyway. It’s always the first place she goes whenever they move to a new town. A way of getting her bearings. She loves the old-book smells, the quiet shuffling of feet and pages, the way the towering shelves seem to swallow up sound and make her feel like the only person on Earth—insulated, small, safe. Most of all she loves the link to the past, the tangible history in her hands when she picks up an old volume that someone else might have loved, once.

    Masen’s Books is about as close as Bella will ever get to being in heaven. Its two labyrinthine stories are divided into careful subsections, so many genres and special interests competing for attention that Bella almost doesn’t know where to start. She finds Little Women immediately—not a 1909 edition, but 1929 isn’t too bad, and at least it’s a sturdy copy, with its simple teal-blue binding in pretty good condition for something nearly as old as she is.

    But why stop there? There’s so much to look at. Anthologies and literary criticism, philosophy and religion, books in a host of other languages—French, Spanish, German, Vietnamese—and even a section of antique travel guides. Esme would love the Baedekers.

    She’s flipping through an Icelandic translation of Pride and Prejudice when she hears the human approach. Even after all these years of living the charade, Bella still has to remind herself not to look up until it’s appropriate, until she hears his polite cough.

    It’s a boy, probably somewhere in his late teens or early twenties, with glasses and an untidy mop of bronze hair. Bella watches his green eyes widen as he takes in her appearance. So much for dressing down and blending in today.

    “Um. Pardon me, miss, but I just wanted to let you know that we closed five minutes ago,” he stammers. Bella bites back her smile. He’s blushing. It’s kind of cute. (She ignores the stirrings of thirst low in her throat.)

    “I’m sorry—I lost track of time.” She explains. A quick scan with her senses tells her she’s the only customer left—how embarrassing. This poor kid probably wants to lock up and go home, and here she is, head in the clouds, forcing him to stay late.

    “It’s fine,” insists the boy. “I don’t mean to rush you. I just didn’t want you to be alarmed that the door is locked.”

    “No, no, I won’t keep you any longer. I’ll just pay for these, if that’s okay,” says Bella, feeling the odd urge to blush herself. Is he always so accommodating, or is he making an exception for the pretty stranger?

    “Of course. It’s, um, right over here.”

    Bella follows him to the register, the one area of the shop she hasn’t explored yet. Now she sees her folly—she should have started here. There’s a great glass-encased shelf behind the cash wrap, locked, full of what look like the oldest and best-preserved volumes in the store. All the special, exceptional books must be here—a store this meticulously curated is bound to have some signed copies, a few first editions. Just looking at the ornate spines and gilded pages sends a shiver of greedy excitement down Bella’s spine. She’ll have to come back sometime for a closer examination.

    The human boy rings up her purchase. Bella likes the way he packs her books into the bag—gingerly, as though each one is a rare exotic fruit he and mustn’t allow them to bruise. He slides a bright green flier into the cover of Little Women.

    “Your shop is beautiful,” offers Bella as she hands him her credit card.

    “Oh, thanks.” He fumbles the credit card swipe, tries again. “It’s my parents’ shop, really,” he admits, eyes downcast as if it’s crucial that he watch the machine print her receipt. His eyelashes are the same red-bronze color as his hair. “I just help out Tuesday through Friday, and run some of the programs.”

    “Programs?”

    “Book clubs, mainly. They’re all listed on the flier.” He tucks Bella’s receipt into the bag. “I’m Edward Masen, by the way.”

    “Bella Cullen,” says Bella. She bites her lip and holds in a wince as she takes his proffered hand. It’s always a little disappointing to watch humans flinch from her cold skin.

    But Edward doesn’t flinch. “Is that short for Isabella?” he asks, passing her the bag of books.

    “Yes,” says Bella, letting her arm sag as if it’s heavy. “But no one’s called me that in a century.” She grins at her little joke, and though Edward can’t possibly understand what’s so funny, he smiles crookedly back.

    When Bella gets home and opens Little Women, the flier almost falls out. It’s such a lurid shade of neon that she has to stop herself from comparing it to the calm, sea-glass hue of Edward’s eyes. What a strange, errant thought.

    The list includes a study group and four different book clubs. Bella’s eyes are drawn to the last one:

New this fall!

Come read and discuss Romantic poetry

Thursday evenings from 6-8

BYO refreshments

    She thinks of the well-worn copy of Keats’  Realms of Gold, and Other Works that has never left the end table in her bed-less bedroom, and of the time she tried to discuss it with Carlisle and was interrupted by Emmett and Jasper crashing through two walls and a dining table. It’s a stark contrast with the memory of Edward, handling each of her books with fastidious care.

    Maybe it would be nice to have a reason to leave the house once in a while (the high school charade definitely doesn’t count.) And maybe it would be nice to hear some new people’s opinions. Maybe a book club is exactly what she needs.

[madelinecoffee]

On Her Own Ch. 2

Summary: 10 years into being a vampire on her own Bella meets Esme at the bookstore where she works, and Esme brings her home hoping Bella will choose to join their family. A/N: Oh my gosh the fact that people are reading this story has blown me away. If you reblogged it or let me know you liked it thank you, I literally am just writing this because I enjoy it. But you people telling me you like it means the world. Here you go another chapter  Words: 2149 Previous Chapters: Ch. 1

Jasper and Esme had made sure that no one tried to sidetrack Bella as she told the Cullen’s her story, Edward had when Bella said she grew up in Forks. And the poor girl was frightened, she was already so nervous about telling them and trying to answer Edward’s question was hard. Jasper smirked as he thought of her emotions; this young vampire was definitely smitten with his brother.

“My dad the police chief, he was quiet and strong and had a great mustache.” Bella smiled at the memory, “He was great, he was busy but he always made time for me. He used to take me fishing with him, even though I’d just read it was special. He and my mom, René fought a lot. She had wanted to leave when I was a baby but I don’t think she was responsibility enough to care for a baby” Bella sighed and Rosalie spoke up.

“What do you mean she wasn’t responsible enough for a baby? You were her child she should’ve wanted to care for you.” Rosalie sounded confused and slightly angry

“She was forgetful, my dad did all the bills and that stuff. If he didn’t I would’ve had to. Once I was about 8 I started taking over the cooking and the cleaning. I think my mom thought I liked it, but I just did it because she didn’t seem to want to.” Bella gave a tiny smile, “I’m quiet the people pleaser, my dad always told me I didn’t have to cook or clean or any of the house work. But I know he appreciated it. Mom just went off doing whatever was her thing for that day.”

Esme spoke up, “What do you mean sweetie?”

Bella tried not to preen at the name, “She was forgetful and really just a free spirit. Her and my dad fought a lot.  She was always wanting to leave Forks and go somewhere else, but he couldn’t leave he was the chief. Honestly I don’t think she understood me at all, she was loud and spunky and always making friends and talking to people. She always wanted to change or do something different. She was convinced I should go blonde.  I didn’t like any of that stuff. I was more like my dad, he was thoughtful and he just knew things. He used to call me Bells.” Her lip trembled, “I miss him.”

Jasper tried to ease the pain she was feeling but she brushed him off and continued, “After I got out of high school he had a heart-attack unexpectedly and died. I was a wreck for the year after, between me and my mom I was the adult so I was grieving while dealing with her grieving. I was paying bills and planning his funereal and trying to figure out what I wanted to do next with my life. And it was just doing it all.”

Alice spoke up, “Oh Bella that’s horrible!”

Bella shrugged, “Its just how it is.” But Alice huffed in irritation, “I tried to work through it I got his badge number and Chief Swan tattooed on my side so he’d always be close to my heart. And he always will be now.”

Bella bit her lip and took a calming breath; she hated talking about her change but that’s where she was in her story.

“So I was about to turn 20, I was gearing up to take community college classes because I just didn’t know what I wanted to do. Some of the guys form La Push and I had gone camping when it happened. The man had long hair and his mate had bright red hair, he said-said he had never smelled anything so good. Apparently the legends are true because after he bite me Jacob went full wolf and tore him to shreds, but the red-head got away. Sometimes I worry she’ll find me and that she blames me for taking her mate. But I mostly try not to think about it.” Bella drew in a shaky breath.

“Jacob knew what was happening, and he stayed with me while I burned. It was easy to leave Forks after that. Rene had been dating this man named Phil and had been staying with him. I just left her a note saying I needed to be away from Forks. And I took the important things with me.”

Carlisle spoke, “And that was it? You’re still legally alive?”

Bella nodded, “Um, yeah. It’s helped because Charlie left me his pension.”

Esme spoke next, “There was never any word from your mother?”

Bella felt her lib quivering overwhelmed with the compassion of Esme’s tone, “No I haven’t. I still have the same number, same email. She knows how to contact me. I guess it’s just easier to pretend that me and Charlie never happened.” Venom started to fill her eyes and Esme was by her in an instant as was Alice pushing Edward off the love seat.  Esme pulled Bella into her arms as she cried and Alice rubbed her back.

It took a few minuets for Bella to calm down; she wiped her eyes on her sleeves. “That’s why I don’t think I’m meant for a family. My own mom doesn’t even want me.”

Rosalie spoke with such venom Bella cowered into Esme, “Well your mother’s an idiot. What I wouldn’t give to have a child and here she is with one and she doesn’t even acknowledge your existence!”

Esme started stroking Bella’s hair, which seemed to sooth Bella who slumped against Esme. “It’s not fair that any of that happened to you Bella, and it’s no doubt that you’ve done very well on your own. But we’d still love to have you as part of our family.” Everyone nodded.

“Yeah Bella, Edward here can’t be the odd one out forever!” Emmett bolstered

“Emmett!” Edward sputtered

Bella sniffled, “You’d really want me?”

Carlisle spoke, “Bella, both me and Esme see the rest of our coven as our kids and we would love it if you’d be our daughter too.”

Bella bit her lip and snuggled further into Esme’s loving embrace, “I’m not sure”

Esme spoke up, “That’s okay sweetie. Why don’t you spend the weekend with us and see what you think okay?”

Bella nodded, “Okay but I’ll have to run by my place to get some clothes.”

Alice burst up, “I have a whole closet already set up for you! And I know you don’t like fashion. But there’s some soft t-shirts and sweaters, and everything is in your size.”

Bella turned away from Esme to hug Alice, “Thank you Alice, no one’s ever bought me anything like that before.”

Alice chuckled, “Well you better get used to it! I’m quiet good at the stock market and you need someone to take care of you for a change!”

Bella could feel that shopping for Bella was what Alice really wanted so she smiled and tightened her hug.

--

After the rest of the family had dispersed around the house, Esme and Alice lead Bella up to what would be her room. She was intrigued with the rest of the Cullen and she admitted to herself, she was attracted to Edward and wanted to get to know him. But he made her nervous, as did Emmett and Jasper. They both looked like they rarely lost a fight. And Bella had her fair share of run-ins with some not so friendly nomads. She felt more comfortable with Esme for now, and Alice was kind as well.

Esme held her hand as she led her up the stairs at a human pace, Bella was grateful for Esme holding her hand. It made her feel grounded, and although she was a grown-up. She was almost 30 for god’s sake! She still needed a mother though; she wanted to be part of this family. She was just afraid.

They walked into a room with windows facing the forest, and a queen bed against the wall.

“We’ll obviously decorate it however you want Bella, but we figured this could be your space. We’ll get you some book cases, I know you’ll need them” Esme listed off

Alice clapped her hands, “Oh this will be such fun! We haven’t decorated a new room in forever! I’ll get my laptop and we can start ordering!” She was out and back in a flash. “And Bella, your part of our family that means our money is yours. Don’t worry about the prices, it’s okay!”

The girls settled on Bella’s new bed as they decided on some bookcases and a cozy chair, and some decals for the wall. They got Bella new sheets that Alice said were really soft and a large comforter for the bed that had star designs on it.

Esme spoke up as they were finishing, “Even if you decide against being part of our family, you can always stay with us.” Esme kissed her head and Bella felt herself sagging against the women and she embraced her.

Esme spoke softly, “Do you want to go to bed sweetie?” She felt Bella nod against her, “I have some pajamas that should fit you. Give me a second okay.” Bella didn’t want her to let go; she hadn’t realized just how much she missed someone caring for her. But she nodded and let go, but she didn’t need to worry Esme was back in a flash with a large button up nightshirt. “Its really soft and it should cover all the necessary parts “We’ll let you get changed, okay?”

Bella slipped into the nightshirt, it was very comfortable. She’d have to ask Esme where she got it. She took out her braid and brushed her fingers through her hair to loosen it.

She stepped out of her room and ran straight into Edward chest where Edward let out an ‘ope’.

“I’m so sorry Edward! I was too in my head I guess” Bella smiled up at him, she hadn’t realized just how tall he was and that hair of his added another bit of height.

“Don’t worry Bella, I was in wrapped up in my thoughts too.” Edward smiled down at her, “You look really pretty by the way. I know you’re just going to bed, but yeah you look nice.”

Bella knew she’d be as red as a tomato if she was human, instead she bit her lip and tried to use her hair to hide her face but Edward pushed it behind her hair. “Don’t be embarrassed Bella, I could compliment you a thousand times and it wouldn’t bother me in the slightest.”

“Thank you, I was just trying to find Esme to say goodnight.”

Edward smiled kindly, “She’s just down the stairs she was just letting us talk. But I’ll let you go goodnight lovely Bella”

“Goodnight Edward”

When Bella bounded down the stairs she had to smile at the scene, Esme was tucked into Carslie’s side reading a book while he read his own. Alice and Rose were designing something together on an i-pad, and Bella had a supsision it had to do with her as alice kept glancing her way. Emmett and Jasper were playing some video game together and they all seemed perfectly content. Her non-beating heart hurt for a moment with want, she desperately wanted to be part of this family but she wasn’t sure if she could be.

Before she could get too lost in her own thoughts Esme stood up noticing Bella. “Are you headed up to bed Bella?” When she nodded, Esme came towards her, “Wonderful I’ll come tuck you in” Bella felt vemon pool her in eyes again, what it would have been like to have a mother who tucked her in at night.

“Headed to bed already Bella?” Emmett said aloud pausing the game him and Jasper were playing, “Don’t you want to help me kick Jasper’s butt?” Bella giggled but shook her head. And one by one she was embraced by the Cullen family, each wishing her a good nights sleep and telling her the nightshirt suited her and that she looked cute.

Esme held her hand as she brought up stairs and help the think comforter open so Bella could climb in, and sat by Bella’s side for a moment stroking her hair.

“I really hope you decided to stay Bella, I’d love you to be my daughter.” Esme told her softly before kissing her head as Bella nodded to overcome by emotion to respond with her words, “Edward is across the hall if you need anything in the night, and we’re all a shout away if you need anything. I love you sweetie.”

With that Bella slipped into the most comforted sleep she had, well ever, knowing the house was filled with people who just wanted her to be part of their family. Maybe she could stay.