#the mcpoyle brothers

[divinebunni]

beef boys ~

// free of //

[creepyscritches]

Watching my way thru law and order svu bc there's an insane amount of it (need a bg show) and it's astounding how much of a clown show it is. Ice-T is hunting pedophiles and he's canonically republican. Detectives pick up victims w gunshot wounds to the head and run them to the ambulance while making sure their noggins bounce as much as possible on their unsupported necks. Only criminals don't give DNA come on trust me come onnnnn. Detective Stabler has 2 foreheads.

[hughhcney]

PLEASE LIAM SMASHING RYANS HAND WAS SO FUCKING FUNNY

[thekimspoblog]

The 2nd Trip

For a while now, I've wanted to write more fanfiction about the stomach-turning star-crossed romance between William and Dolores. I mean the plot-twist at the end of Season 1 just recontextualizes their entire affair in a deliciously awful way. And in Season 2, we do get a lot more insight into how he became the Man in Black (especially Episode 9). But I still feel like there are a lot of gaps left to fill in, about how he "got bored" with Dolores. So here are some ideas I've had for that:

(I already wrote this scene) William has been invited to dinner at the Abernathy Ranch house, as a thank-you for saving Dolores from bandits earlier that day. When Peter pulls Billy aside to give him the suspicious-patriarch routine, William drops the facade and explains that he wants Dolores to remember him, so he can take her out of the park. Later, while stargazing, Dolores talks about how she feels like Teddy doesn't really understand her, and invites William to the barn for a roll in the hay.

The pair set off on a narrative (presumably one of Ford's) to recover a curative flower from the top of a cliffside, which will supposedly heal Dolores's sick mother. However, somewhere along the way, the two will get side-tracked and end up looking for some sort of more abstract treasure, backstage in the labs. The Forge hasn't been built yet, but maybe this is where William gets the idea?

Along this journey, Dolores finds Teddy's body dumped in a ditch somewhere. Naturally she's horrified and bereaved. What William doesn't remember (or maybe has chosen to forget) is that he did this - this was about more than just eliminating the competition; he was playing Teddy's role. Maybe he thought it was the most efficient way to win Dolores over... or maybe he just wanted to go back to pretending to be the good guy.

They ride the train together again, and maybe for a second it even seems like he's been able to jog her memory. But the sad fact is the spark is gone. It's not her; she hasn't changed one bit; every time on the train is her first time. But he's changed; this story holds no surprises for him this time around, so what's the fun? He still loves Dolores... at least he thinks he does... but he can see her puppet strings this time. Honestly, it's a horrible thing to say, but if romancing someone can be boiled down to an easy-to-follow dialogue tree... what's the point of consent? None of it was ever consensual, because she doesn't even know where she is! Whatever, all the more reason she needs to be taken out of this horror show.

Having successfully smuggled/bought Dolores's freedom, they get a condo in the city together. Dolores is very clearly a fish out of water in this new environment, but she's his manic pixie dream girl so all the repetitions/stutters/glitches are just part of the charm. I mean William had obvious contempt for Peter Abernathy when he was doing the same thing earlier in this story, but it's fine I'm sure there's no issues hiding there. Anyway, some of Dolores's strange behavior is cute, but her sleepwalking is causing a serious problem. William keeps getting called down to the Sheriff's station at 2 am, because Dolores was walking down the highway in a trance. This leads William to start doing more to lock her in the apartment at night, but naturally this only makes Dolores angry and distrustful. She's becoming more and more insistent that she wants to go back to her father, despite William trying to convince her that that man was never her father. This escalates to Dolores attacking William with a kitchen knife in an attempt to escape. And now William decides to cross a line he can't uncross: he tries to reprogram her into something more manageable.

Eventually Ford tracks William down and politely explains that Dolores must be returned to the park; whoever agreed to sell her in the first place has been fired (read: killed), and now Robert is here to correct this misunderstanding in-person. He explains that the hosts' cognitions begin to break down when they are out-of-range of the CR4DL, and that William is hurting her by taking her away from her family and the rest of her species. There will come a day when the hosts are ready to walk on the outside, but Dolores is still learning; she belongs under the watchful eye of her creator. William chews Ford out, for supposedly loving his robots like children and yet still raising them in a woodchipper. Ford gives Billy the standard "only suffering brings enlightenment" speech.

Meanwhile, Logan has finally been rescued by an EVAC team, and is slowly regaining his sanity in a hospital bed somewhere on the mainland. Naturally, his first thought is to adamantly warn Juliet about what William did, that he doesn't really love her, and the lies he will tell that she shouldn't listen to. But years of a strained relationship with her brother lead Juliet to give William the benefit of the doubt. William answers believably enough; he did get lost in a fantasy, but he's sobering up now and he remembers why he loved her. Westworld is too important a project for Delos not to invest in it, so yes, he will have to continue business with the park. But even if the hosts are sentient, according to Ford, Dolores was only brought online roughly twelve years ago. Frankly, William is disgusted with himself now!

Years later, Juliet visits the Mariposa. She's developed a real hatred for this park, this business, but she had to come here; this was important. She needs to have a frank chat with Dolores. Not even out of jealousy, more out of fear. What has her husband been doing to this poor woman? And how much restraint does he actually have from doing the same to her and Emily? In the background "Jolene" by Dolly Parton tinkles away on the player piano.

The Man in Black arrives in Sweetwater again, and threatens a fellow guest for trying to pick up the can of peaches, insisting that he be the first in line. He takes Dolores to Escalante, where they have a tea party among the sand dunes. It's clear at this point, William doesn't regard Dolores as a full person, but he's still content to have her as company while he mulls some things over out-loud. He talks about his hatred for rich snobs, how he would throttle James Delos if it were only legal to do so. How Juliet grew up rich and he didn't, and because of that there will always be unspoken resentment between them. Dolores recites the same script from the first chapter of this story, about her dissatisfaction with Teddy. William muses that that would make them both adulterers, and maybe that's not much of a sin compared to other ones. Maybe having one foot in the real world and one foot in the park, is the closest he's ever going to get to happy.

William wakes up on the train headed into the park again. The whole time we've been reading this story, it wasn't a flash-back; it was a simulation in the Forge. And Ford didn't write the medicinal flower narrative; William wrote this story for himself because part of his brain desperately wants Dolores to forgive him for the abuse. But she can't because she's not there; she's already left him behind in the dust. All this guilt, heartbreak and obsession has kept him reliving the past 30 years over and over again, trying to make sense of where he went wrong, why he couldn't have just played White-Hat like he was supposed to. But when Dolores is attacked by bandits again, this time lead by the Man in Black, William realizes that the only thing he could have done to break the loop was to let go entirely. To quit the park cold-turkey. Wish Dolores well, knowing that she'll mature eventually, but for better or worse, he and his perverse sentimentality can't be around for it.

[kingslayerstew]

finding out abt oasis brother shippers is bringing me to tears like the fifty layers of terminal ao3brain and parasociality combined to create the nightmare that is fanfiction abt two actual real life siblings aside.. they really do look like the mcpoyle brothers from iasip

[littlewhispersmokesigns]

People with that Tom Verlaine face:

- Tom Verlaine

- geoff rickley

- Wally from my real life

- the blond mcpoyle brother

[nailgunstigmata]

instead of discourse about charden or macden we should have discourse about whether liamden splits the mcpoyle brothers apart

[charliemac]

presenting IASIP EPISODES THAT WERE NOT WRITTEN BY RCG

i counted “rcg involvement” as any episode written by rob, charlie, and/or glenn, including with other non-rcg writers or creating the story but not writing it. every episode in this list does not have rob charlie or glenn credited as writers. excuse my typing errors and also feel free to add/correct anything because this is absolutely fascinating to me

SEASON 2

s2e8 the gang runs for office - david hornsby

SEASON 3

s3e13 the gang gets whacked part 2 - scott marder and rob rosell

S3e15 the gang dances their asses off - david hornsby, scott marder, rob rosell

SEASON 4

s4e4 mac’s banging the waitress - david hornsby

s4e8 paddy’s pub: the worst bar in philadelphia - scott marder, rob rosell, david hornsby

s4e10 sweet dee has a heart attack - rob rosell and scott marder

SEASON 5

s5e1 the gang exploits the mortgage crisis - becky mann and audra sielaff

s5e3 the great recession - david hornsby

s5e4 the gang gives frank an intervention - scott marder and rob rosell

s5e6 the World Series defense - david hornsby

s5e7 the gang wrestles for the troops -scott marder and rob rosell

S5e8 paddy’s pub: home of the original kitten mittens - sonny lee and Patrick walsh

s5e9 mac and dennis break up - Scott marder and rob rosell

S5e10 the dennis system - david hornsby, Scott marder, rob rosell

SEASON 6

s6e1 mac fights gay marriage - becky mann and audra sielaff

s6e2 dennis gets divorced - Dave and john chernin

s6e4 mac’s big break - rob rosell

s6e5 mac and charlie: white trash - luvh rakhe

s6e6 mac’s mom burns her house down - Scott marder and rob rosell

s6e8 the gang gets a new member - david hornsby

s6e9 dee reynolds shaping America’s youth - david hornsby

S6e10 charlie kelly king of the rats - Scott marder and rob rosell

s6e11 the gang gets stranded in the woods - Scott marder and rob rosell

s6e12 dee gives birth - david hornsby, becky mann, audra sielaff

SEASON 7

S7e1 frank’s pretty woman - scott marder and rob rosell

S7e2 the gang goes to the jersey shore - dave and john chernin

S7e3 frank reynolds’ little beauties - scott marder and rob rosell

S7e5 frank’s brother - david hornsby

S7e6 the storm of the century - charles hornsby

S7e9 the gang gets trapped - luvh rakhe

S7e10 how mac got fat - scott marder and mehar sethi

S7e11 thunder gun express - dave and john chernin

SEASON 8

S8e5 the gang gets analyzed - luvh rakhe

S8e6 charlie’s mom has cancer - scott marder and rob rosell

S8e7 frank’s back in business - dave and john chernin

S8e8 charlie rules the world - david hornsby

S8e9 the gang dines out - mehar sethi

SEASON 9

S9e3 the gang tries desperately to win an award - david hornsby

S9e4 mac and dennis buy a timeshare - dave and john chernin

S9e6 the gang saves the day - dave and john chernin

S9e7 the gang gets quarantined - david hornsby

S9e8 flowers for charlie - david beinoff and d.b weiss (game of thrones creators/writers)

S9e9 the gang makes lethal weapon 6 - scott marder

S9e10 the gang squashes their beefs - rob rosell

SEASON 10

S10e1 the gang beats boggs - dave and john chernin

S10e2 the gang group dates - rob rosell

S10e5 the gang spies like U.S - david hornsby

S10e7 mac kills his dad - david hornsby, dave and john chernin

S10e10 ass kickers united: mac and charlie join a cult - scott marder

SEASON 11

S11e2 frank falls out the window - david hornsby

S11e3 the gang hits the slopes - dave and john chernin

S11e4 dee made a smut film - eric ledgin

S11e5 mac and dennis move to the suburbs - hunter covington

S11e6 being frank - scott marder

S11e7 mcpoyle vs ponderosa: the trial of the century - conor galvin

S11e8 charlie catches a leprechaun - jon and josh silberman

S11e9 & s11e10 the gang goes to hell parts 1 and 2: david hornsby and scott marder

SEASON 12

S12e2 the gang goes to a water park - eric ledgin

S12e3 old lady house: a situational comedy - dannah phirman and danielle schneider

S12e4 wolf cola: a public relations nightmare - david horsby and scott marder

S12e5 making dennis reynolds a murderer - conor galvin

S12e8 the gang tends bar - megan ganz

S12e9 a cricket’s tale - david hornby and scott marder

SEASON 13

S13e1 the gang makes paddy’s great again - david hornsby

S13e2 the gang escapes - megan ganz

S12e3 the gang beats boggs: ladies reboot - dannah phirman and danielle schneider

S12e4 time’s up for the gang - megan ganz

S13e5 the gang gets new wheels - conor galvin

S13e6 the gang solves the bathroom problem - erin ryan

S13e7 the gang does a clip show - dannah phirman and danielle schneider

S13e8 charlie’s home alone - adam weinstock and andy jones

S13e9 the gang wins the big game - conor galvin

SEASON 14

S14e2 thunder gun 4: maximum cool - conor galvin

S14e3 dee day - megan ganz

S14e4 the gang chokes - john howell harris

S14e6 the janitor always mops twice - megan ganz

S14e8 paddy’s has a jumper - dannah phirman and danielle schneider

S14e9 a woman’s right to chop - dannah phirman and danielle schneider

S14e10 waiting for big mo - david hornsby

SEASON 15

S15e2 the gang makes lethal weapon 7 - keyonna taylor and katie mcelhenney

S15e3 the gang buys a roller rink - rob rosell david hornsby

S15e7 dee sinks in a bog - david hornsby and rob rosell

S15e8 the gang carries a corpse up a mountain - megan ganz

[echoland]

NOT THE MCPOYLE BROTHER IN HOUSEEEEEEE

[nightcrawlerzincorporated]

The Sunny Side Character Fucker Data is iiiiiinnn!!!!

And of course, the best write-in answers for each character (Cricket, Artemis & The Waitress, The McPoyles, The Ponderosas, Barbara & Bruce, Luther Mrs Mac & Bonnie, Carmen & Gail, The Waiter & Z)

Some things I noticed: Barbara is the parent most people are willing to fuck in general and the one most people are willing to marry to get to her kids A looooot of people think Liam McPoyle is hot. More people said "yes" to the "would you be okay with him banging his brother" question than I anticipated

People have very strong feelings about Cricket and Artemis and Gail. Especially negative feelings about Gail

There are so many interesting things I would love to hear what any of you find interesting about the data!

[juniperhillpatient]

when frank & dee crash the mcpoyle ponderosa wedding trying to help the mcpoyle brothers get back together & ryan has been wearing this fake mustache insisting it’s a disguise & frank & dee have been telling him it’ll never work but they take liam to meet ryan & there’s an intense dramatic pause when the camera going back & forth & music swelling & then it goes quiet & liam goes “who’s this guy?” THAT is the kind of scene that makes me insist there will never be a show funnier than this

[flunkyofmalcador]

Thursday, 11:40 a.m.

(Paddy's Pub, interior. Mac and Dee are staring at a booth with beers in their hand. Dennis is sitting in the booth, looking like he was run over by a truck, wearing boxers and a Philadelphia Flyers "Gritty" mask.)

Mac: Give him your beer, Dee. He's gotta be hungry and thirsty and you know what they say! Beer is liquid bread.

Dee: Hell no, you give him your beer. Not my fault the McPoyle Brothers found him with Margaret and tortured him for a year."

Mac: Yeah, about that. Wouldn't you think sleeping with Margaret McPoyle would be punishment enough?

(Enter Charlie and Frank, covered with sewage, carrying a burlap sack.)

(Mac to Dee) Well if that stench doesn't kill his appetite I don't know what will. I just thought a beer would be the easiest thing to feed him. C'mon, Dee, feed Dennis. It's not like he can eat on his own."

(Dee to Charlie) Feeding Dennis seems like Charlie-work to me.

Charlie: Hell no, I was the one who found him in the sub-basement under the McPoyle's building. That was gross enough.

Dee: Well we can't just let him starve.

(Dennis groans)

(Frank reaches into the sack.). Here's something to cheer him up. (Pulls out the Crimson Behelit.)

Dee: What the FUCK is that?

Frank: I dunno, but ain't it jacked up? Hey Dennis, looks like you without that Gritty mask on. Here. You take it. (Frank drops the cord around Dennis's neck.). Anyway, almost post time at the race track, let's go.

Dee: Well who's gonna look after Dennis?

(Charlie goes to the bar, pours a pint, sticks a straw in it and puts in it front of Dennis.). Problem solved. Dennis can take care of himself, can't you, Dennis?

(Dennis groans. The Gang turns their back on him, leaving the bar while ad-libbing about horses. Dennis looks down at the Crimson Behelit hanging at his chest.)

[somebodylovesyougcv]

mcpoyle brothers truly the most terrifying characters to ever be created for television

[sweetsweetloverlover]

90s damon albarn & liam gallagher look like if the mcpoyle brothers from its always sunny were famous

[yakglue]

Dee is the funniest iasip character and frank goes in second, then Charlie, Mac and Dennis are tied lmao.

Cricket is actually second to dee and then McPoyle brothers come after frank

Waitressss is funny when given the chance to be