#the new item SLAPPED btw it's now my new favorite

[teathattast]

Full rest day ✅

Try new item from my favorite restaurant ✅

Iced Green tea ✅

Grocery shopping ✅

Be grateful for my besties ✅

Crave romance ✅

Focus on what I have, not what I don't ✅

Be patient with my process ✅

[goldengoddess]

being married to kaz brekker headcanons

request: hi! could you do being married to kaz brekker headcanons? i absolutely love your writing btw!

a/n: omg thank u so much! and yes!! domestic kaz i absolutely love this he deserves this happy ending 

no one would ever expect that being married to kaz brekker would be easy

they’d expect constant threats

mortal danger

constant illegal activity

and they’d only be partially correct

being married to kaz brekker was like getting a new adventure every day

and sometimes that adventure wasn’t illegal

a lot of the times it was though

sometimes the adventure was taking a walk through a forest and reaching a meadow filled with sunflowers

kaz would hold your hand

finally at ease, away from the business of ketterdam

he’d lead you through the maze of flowers until you found a clearing

and then the two of you would sit in the sun for hours

talking about anything or sitting silently in each other’s company

because you two were married and there was nothing more important than the other

there was no underlying plan kaz needed to figure out

there was just you and the smell of the grass

“you are it for me” he would say to you and to the flowers

after you first got married, the two of you stayed in ketterdam

you’d bought an apartment away from the slat and the crow club, because it was meant to be a new space for the two of you

you lived right next to the best coffee shop in town

so whichever of the two of you woke up first would make the short trek to the shop and pick up your regular orders

always a tall black coffee for kaz

mornings were blissful

regulars at a coffee shop

the quiet of your own space

the smiles the two of you could share privately

but then the perfect bubble would be broken

and kaz would jump head first into the dangerous streets of the city

and he’d almost always come back hurt or annoyed or in a foul mood

which usually meant he’d distance himself in fear of taking it out on you

this almost never worked because you’d gotten pretty used to dealing with kaz in a way that left the two of you happy

and you’d annoy him with random facts about your day until he’d talk to you

“and then this afternoon i was talking to nina about-”

“okay okay y/n please let’s talk about something else no more nina stories, i know too much about her as it is”

so even though ketterdam was your home and kaz’s

after a few years the two of you moved to the country side, only an hour from ketterdam but still far enough away that it felt like your own little world

kaz would make a weekly trip to the city to check on things but you were his priority

finding peace for once was his priority

you and kaz had known each other for years

so even though some days physical contact was hard, you had helped him get to a place that touching was normal between the two of you

the best thing about married life was waking up next to kaz

being able to turn around in the morning and wake up to his face

his arm thrown over your waist

his mouth slightly parted

and you’d wait until the woke up to see him realize you were next to him and see how his smile took over his face

“it’s creepy that you watch me sleep y/n”

“i can’t help it, my husband it gorgeous”

living together

being married to each other

obviously came with bickering

little fights about leaving the door unlocked

or forgetting to add toilet paper to the grocery list

but those fights ended in mumbled apologizes and frantic kisses and lots and lots of giggling into each other’s mouths

both of you had a bad habit of fidgeting with your wedding rings

the matching gold bands were a total comfort item for the two of you

every time you were anxious you twisted it around your finger until kaz came and held your hands still

and every time kaz watched you do something totally mundane that made him fall in love all over again he’d rub the wedding band as a reminder of how lucky he got

inside the bands, the others initials were carved in

but in your band the words ‘yours forever” were also added

even though the two of you now lived your happy domestic lives

trying out new cake recipes and having lazy sundays together

kaz brekker was still the dirty hands you had fallen in love with back at the barrel

and sometimes he needed to get his hands dirty

once every couple of months he’d come back to the house

his lip torn and his limp worse then usual, his shirt covered in what you prayed was someone else’s blood

you’d sit him on the counter and stand between his legs, disinfecting any cuts

“sorry” he’d mumble

as if he had anything to be sorry for

“you have nothing to be sorry for. i love all versions and parts of you. as long as you come back home in one piece you don’t have to apologize to me ever”

kaz still couldn’t understand how you were able to love the version of him that did anything to survive

being married comes with certain questions

those questions mostly coming from jesper fahey himself

“so, kaz, y/n, the favorite couple of ketterdam, when can we expect little kaz’s running around?”

wylan would slap his own forehead in utter disappointment of his husbands inappropriate questions

the two of them had a little girl they had adopted a few years back

and you loved her to death

and though kaz was much more reluctant to hold the little girl and kiss her

you’d once heard him telling her that he would hurt anyone that ever threatened her

he was her uncle and godfather after all

you always blushed at jesper’s questions about children

brushing off the comment

not bringing it up again

but one night, after spending the day with wylan and jesper

kaz whispered, “we could be parents”

you turned to him ready to find a ‘just kidding’ look on his face

but he had been staring at the ceiling

total seriousness 

“do you want to be a dad?”

he had nodded his head, still not looking at you

“then you’ll be a dad”

his head had snapped your way and his smile made everything the two of you had ever suffered through worth it

“i want a son” he had laughed into the crook of your neck after showering your face with kisses

you scoffed teasingly, “and if i want a girl?”

being married to kaz was beautiful

and even though kaz couldn’t see it

this is what he deserved

this peace and domestic happiness

and the promise of a future with you

[whatifyoulivelikethat]

heated, m | jjk

pairing(s): jungkook x reader

summary: An (innocent?) conversation about D/s dynamics accidentally leads to you confessing that you think about your childhood best friend while getting off. To your childhood best friend, Jeon Jungkook. Erm. This is after he told you that you would be “an awful sub”, btw.

warnings: rated M (18+) for language, discussions about adult topics; reader is bisexual; smut (fem reader, dry humping, fingering, [tiny bit] m-receiving oral, penetrative sex); fluffy af; non-idol!AU; F2L; softdom!Jungkook x softbrat!reader; you kind of have a forearm kink and you never let Jungkook have his lovey-dovey moment, whoops

MMA 2020 ‘ON’ Jungkook? Yeah. That one.

--

“I could never be a sub.”

You clicked rapidly as you spoke, mashing the right button on your mouse. It was quite loud, paired with your mechanical keyboard.

“Why not?”

The music coming from Jeon Jungkook’s smartphone was a rhythm game, nearly as loud as you, since he was grunting angrily at it. It was very obvious when he missed a beat.

“I can’t imagine that being me, you know?”

You, on the other hand, were on your computer, playing with the new items in League of Legends from the latest patch. Using the practice tool, you had loaded up your favorite champion, Jhin, the Virtuoso, and messed with various builds, trying to find the best combination. So far, Lethality was feeling pretty good.

“Like why would I ever let my pleasure be handled by someone else?” you mused, reading the high damage numbers of each shot. Oh, the fourth shot felt nice. “That sounds stupid.”

Jungkook rolled over on your bed, growling in his throat as the level ended. He restarted it, trying to get a better score. “Maybe people like to let go sometimes. You know, not always be in control.”

You snorted. “I could never trust someone else with my body.”

“You got an alien body or something?”

“Shut up, Jungkook.”

“No.”

“Fine.”

“Anyway,” Jungkook continued, ignoring your outburst. “I didn’t ask if you could be a sub, I just asked what you thought of domination and submission as a dynamic in general.”

You shrugged, trying to see if you could do Baron alone. Welp, you needed lifesteal, of course. “I mean, I’ve tried it in various situations. I was never the sub.”

“Kinky.”

“Shut up, Jungkook.”

“No.” Jungkook suddenly sat up, excited that he achieved a higher score. “Look, look. I got ninety-eight.”

You craned your head to look at his phone screen. “Why isn’t it one hundred? You’re a disgrace to this family.”

He bopped you on the nose with his phone. “If I was part of your family, your family would be even more dysfunctional than it is now.”

You rubbed your nose and looked up at him. “How much gel did you use in your hair? You look like a wet dog.”

Jungkook’s eyebrows went up and he touched his long black hair. “It’s not crunchy though.” He grabbed your hand and lowered his head, placing your palm on his slicked back hair. “See?”

You pulled your hand back, staring at your palm. “Still feels weird though. I call sorcery.”

He shrugged, creaking the black leather jacket he was wearing. He wore a black t-shirt under it. The black jeans he had been wearing were on your bed, swapped for the black joggers he kept at your place. You weren’t really sure why he left the jacket on. Maybe he was cold or something. It was pretty cold in your apartment. You were wearing fleece green pajamas with Pikachu all over them.

“You want me to turn the heat up?” you said, gesturing to his jacket.

Jungkook looked down at his chest. “Eh. It’s fine. Saves you money.”

You shrugged, getting up from your chair, leaving the League client open. “You’re only staying a little while, right? Party to go to and all that?”

Jungkook followed you as you left your room. “Told you it was cancelled, so I was just going to sleep over. No reason to go back home.”

You turned around, walking backwards. “When did you say it was cancelled?”

Jungkook raised his dark eyebrows. “Literally when I walked in your apartment.”

“Hah.”

You turned back around and went to your fridge, grabbing an aloe juice. Jungkook went to your water kettle, hunting for hot chocolate among your tea packets.

“You’d make an awful sub anyway,” Jungkook said, returning to the original subject as he filled the kettle with water from your filtered sink faucet. “Like, probably the fucking worst.”

You took a large swig and glared at him. “Alright, first of all, you wouldn’t even–”

“You’re terrible with authority.”

You paused. “Okay, true.”

“You’re angry, twenty-four, seven.”

You walked up to him and slapped him in his very hard pecs. He gestured at his chest, as if to indicate, exhibit A.

“And you’re super uptight.”

“I am not uptight.”

“Control freak.”

“That’s–”

Jungkook turned around and placed the kettle on its stand. You swooped in with a Pikachu-themed kitchen towel and wiped the excess water away, scowling. Jungkook raised his eyebrows at you, brown eyes laughing.

“That’s literally a safety hazard!” you exclaimed, waving the towel at him.

Jungkook rolled his eyes and pressed the button to start heating the water. “Haven’t you ever just… not freaked out over every little thing? Done something spontaneous and stupid?”

You placed the kitchen towel back in its proper place. “No, because that would be spontaneous and stupid, Jeon Jungkook.”

He leaned against the counter, watching you perfectly fold the towel into three parts and hang it on the rail. He scratched his nose, shaking his head. “You should be more like me.”

“Having the police called on you because you were standing on a lawn chair tooting a party horn at four in the morning?”

“That was one time! Stop bringing it up,” Jungkook groaned.

You raised your hands in innocence. “Well, I was the one called to pick you up because you literally couldn’t remember any other number and I was very disturbed on New Year’s Eve, where I should have been peacefully sleeping and not hauling your drunk ass across town.”

Jungkook sighed exaggeratedly. “I’m sorry, okay? I won’t drink that much again. Jimin made me do shots–”

“You always blame Park Jimin,” you interjected, smiling. “Jimin’s the kind of guy who only wears clothes to take them off.”

“Well, it gets him laid, so I guess it’s working.”

The kettle whistled noisily, cutting through the conversation. You took a sip from your aloe juice as Jungkook grabbed a mug from your cupboard and poured the hot chocolate powder into it.

“You want some milk?”

He looked up. “You have milk?”

You went to the fridge and took out a small carton. “Because you said you were coming.”

“Aw, what a sweetie.”

“Shut up, Jungkook.”

“No.”

That’s how it was with you two. Growing up together was the same conversation over and over of you constantly saying shut up and Jungkook always replying with no. If both your dads hadn’t been such good friends, you probably wouldn’t have been able to tolerate him. Since they were, you were forced to, which turned out to be okay, since it turned out you had similar interests in games and such. It drifted apart a bit when you two entered high school, but you two reconnected once university started.

The dysfunctionality Jungkook was referring to was your two older sisters, who both got pregnant out of wedlock and thus caused a lot of tension between them, your parents, and you, the one who hadn’t actually done that yet. And you were trying to keep it that way.

Jungkook poured half-water and half-milk, stirring it with a silver spoon he found in your drawer. You lived alone, having gotten a full scholarship to be able to pay for tuition, meals, and part of a small apartment. Your parents paid for the rest – another point of strain between you and your sisters. That’s why you kept your grades up and rarely went out.

“When was the last time you fucked a guy?”

You sucked the inside of your cheek. “Dunno. Maybe two years ago.”

Jungkook raised his eyebrows and took a long sip. “So, only girls, huh?”

You tilted your head and sighed. “They don’t get you pregnant.”

“Neither does a condom.”

“That’s a ninety-eight percent chance, not one hundred.”

He licked the excess off his pink lips. He looked like he wanted to say something, but reconsidered, taking another sip before replying. “You don’t miss dick?”

“I mean, a dildo is a dick.”

Jungkook nearly spat out his hot chocolate. You snatched your Pikachu towel again and threatened him with it. He raised a hand, coughing.

“A dildo is not a dick,” he hacked out. “You insult me.”

“Hmph.” You turned back around and placed the Pikachu towel back in its place, making sure the graphic was perfectly centered.

“You tell your parents?”

You narrowed your eyes. ‘Why the fuck would I tell my parents that I fuck girls instead of guys to avoid getting pregnant?”

He shrugged. “Give them peace of mind?”

“You think too highly of the generation before us.”

Jungkook gave you a weird look. “So… you’re just using them?”

“No.” You paused. “Okay, maybe a little, but it’s not because they’re girls. I guess I haven’t found someone who understands me yet.”

He took a long, noisy sip of hot chocolate. You narrowed your eyes at him.

“No one can understand you if you only fuck once and drop them.”

“Wouldn’t you fucking know,” you replied irritably.

“Now, I fuck multiple times before I realize it’s not going to work out,” Jungkook countered.

You shoved your bottle of aloe juice back into your fridge. Suddenly, you weren’t thirsty anymore.

“Is that the only reason?”

You closed the fridge door.

“Reason for what?”

“Is fear of pregnancy the only reason you fuck girls?”

“I don’t know!” you shouted, throwing your hands up. You spun around, blowing hot air. “I don’t fucking know why I do it, Jungkook. I don’t know why I load up dating apps to only hook up with girls, I don’t know why I don’t try to get into relationships with them, I don’t know what is wrong with me and why I can’t give anyone a chance and I don’t know why you pop up in my head every time I try to fucking masturbate! It is annoying and I do not like it, so I try to get off with someone else!”

Your chest was heaving with exertion and annoyance, hand curled onto a fist and planted on your kitchen counter, glaring at the space past Jungkook’s head, muscle twitching in your cheek. Your heart was beating so fast it didn’t feel real.

Silence.

“Fuck you, Jungkook.”

And then you turned around, stalking back to your bedroom.

Or would have, if you didn’t hear the clink of the mug touching the kitchen counter and Jungkook grabbing your upper arm, yanking you back, slamming you against his muscular body. You hissed, staring into his chest.

“Let me go.”

“Hold on a second.” You watched Jungkook take a deep breath, his toned, tan skin rising and falling. The silver necklace on his collarbones flashed as he breathed. “Just hold on a damn second.”

Your eyes were on the low neckline of his black shirt. It felt weird being close to him. Not that you two haven’t been physically close, because you had. But it had never been like this. Since you realized he wouldn’t leave your mind every time you tried to masturbate. Since you started looking to other people to push him out. Since you were sure that it was not just a passing thought, not just your brain playing tricks on you. And being this close to him now, you understood.

And it scared you.

“You cannot dump all that on me and expect me not to react,” Jungkook said quietly.

“Shut up, Jungkook.”

“No,” he snapped. He grabbed both your upper arms and shook you violently, making you jerk your head up to blink at him. Jungkook furrowed his brows, his dark eyes glaring at you, jaw clenched tightly. “I will not shut up. Why should I shut up? I should shut you up.”

And then he kissed you.

Your eyes widened. Jungkook’s pink lips were on you. You. On your lips, pressed firmly against them, gripping you so tight you were losing feeling in your arms. You tore back, stumbling, touching your lips, shoulders shaking, not sure why your heart was beating out of your chest, not sure why your lips tingled and wanted more, not sure why Jungkook slowly opening his eyes and flickering to you made your knees knock together uncomfortably.

“What are you doing?” you sputtered. “You don’t even… what…?”

“I’m kissing you,” he growled, walking up to you and pinning you against the counter. “I’m fucking kissing you because you want me to.”

“I don’t…”

“Just shut up, please.”

And then Jungkook kissed you again, harder this time, pressing you against the kitchen counter, hands coming up and taking you by the waist, pulling you to him and his leather jacket, him and his black shirt, breathing your name into your lips, your hands grabbing his t-shirt and yanking him to you, gasping into his mouth. And you wanted to say, no, no, you weren’t supposed to know, but it was too late because you were shoving his leather jacket off, grasping his shoulders, fingers pressing into his hard muscles, sliding down his biceps.

You yanked your head back and his hand came up to grab it back, kissing you more, more, tongue licking your lips, hissing your name, grinding his hips against yours. Your hand came up in between you two, stopping him, stopping him and his insatiable lips.

“You have to s-say–” You moaned, feeling him harden against your fleece pajamas. “You have to say it.”

“Say what?” Jungkook muttered impatiently, kissing your hand, speaking into your palm.

“Say you’re okay with it,” you gritted out as he rolled his crotch into yours.

“Obviously I’m okay with it,” he grumbled. “Why else am I humping you in your kitchen?”

“You said I’m a c-control freak,” you groaned, throwing your head back as Jungkook slid his hands down to your ass and squeezed it, grinding against you.

“You are,” he grunted. “You can’t let go, you can’t enjoy yourself, you can’t even tell me you like me so I can fucking fuck you already, instead of me cancelling my parties so I can spend time laying on your bed and staring at you playing video games wondering when you’re going to fucking notice that I want to bang you.”

“What?” you replied breathlessly.

Jungkook rolled his eyes. “You’re so busy controlling your own life that you don’t even notice the people around you anymore.”

“What?” you repeated again as Jungkook hoisted you up by your ass and began to walk, forcing you to grab him by the shoulders and stare down his right arm, the fully tattooed one with flowers and script and the tiny circle with angry slits for eyes and a frown on the inside of his elbow, the one Jungkook said was for you and you had slapped him in the chest and told him to shut up.

“Let me take over for once,” he mumbled, placing his chin on your shoulder and nudging you with his head and his non-crispy but still not quite soft dark hair.

“You said I would be an awful sub.”

Jungkook dumped you on the bed, shooing you upwards. You didn’t move, frowning at him. He sighed dramatically.

“You would. You are,” he corrected, planting a hand on your chest and pushing you down, bouncing you against your Pikachu bedsheets. He sandwiched your arms at your sides and straddled your torso. The bed bowed far too low and you almost slid off. Hurriedly, you scooted upwards and Jungkook followed, unbothered.

“You said I’m terrible with authority.”

Jungkook wrestled your arms back down and pinned them with his strong thighs. “You are.”

“You said I’m angry, twenty-four, seven.”

He cocked his head, slowly unbuttoning your pajama shirt. “Still true.”

“And you said I’m uptight,” you added ruefully, pouting.

Jungkook shrugged, reaching in between his legs to unbutton he last few ones. “I’ll fuck it out of you.”

“Jungkook!”

“What?”

He paused, towering above you, eyebrow raised. His black hair curled around his ears, against his silver hoops and base of his neck. His dark eyes pierced down at you, tiny mole under his lips clearly visible from this position. You could see the bottom of his sharp chin, the black t-shirt clinging to his chest, the shape of his tan arms, one tattooed, one not, from below.

“Y-you’re pinching my right arm…”

Jungkook looked down, moving his left leg. “Sorry.”

You winced, pulling out your left arm to rub the other. He tapped your forearm impatiently with his finger.

“You’re ruining the moment,” he scolded.

“You ruined it by bruising me,” you shot back, backing up to your pillows on your elbows, grimacing as you soothed your arm.

“I’m going to bruise you more if you keep being a little brat,” Jungkook growled, following you on hands and knees, the neckline of his t-shirt hanging down, revealing way too much of his skin. Your eyes widened and you slipped, a white plush Poro bonking you in the head. He grabbed it and tossed it aside, the poor guy rolling on the floor.

“That’s very rude,” you muttered, but he was over your body now, breathing hard, staring down your now open shirt and the curve of your breasts into your black bra.

“Why do you get hotter every year?”

You raised an eyebrow. “I… don’t?”

Jungkook shoved the sides of your pajama shirt apart impatiently, reaching under your back and pinching the bra clasp, undoing it with one hand.

“Yes, you do,” he exhaled hotly. “Every year you get prettier and prettier and it pisses me off so much that I have to work out to look half as good as you.”

You felt your ears and cheeks get hot. “Well… you do look very, erm, good.”

“You’re very convincing,” Jungkook chuckled darkly, pushing your bra up and sucking in his lower lip as he revealed your hard, quivering nipples.

Your eyes shifted away from his hungry eyes. “I, uh… am very wet.”

A single, perfectly shaped eyebrow ticked. “Show me.”

“Um…”

He lifted himself off you, pointing down.

“Show me,” Jungkook commanded.

You tried to move your arms and found them tangled in your clothes. You frowned and shrugged out of your pajama shirt, chucking it and your bra aside, before gripping the waistband of your green fleece pants. You hesitated and looked back at Jungkook, who just flapped his hand downwards, giving you a neutral expression.

You puffed your cheeks and raised your hips, yanking your pants and panties down your thighs. You had to bend your legs a bit to fully take them off since Jungkook’s knees were on the outside of your thighs.

Now you were fully naked in front of your childhood best friend. And he was still fully clothed.

“Er, aren’t you going to–”

Jungkook cut you off. “You still haven’t shown me.”

You blinked at him. “What do you want me to do, become a fucking pretzel?”

Jungkook shrugged. “Any way you can prove to me you’re wet.”

You narrowed your eyes. “Fucking…” You bent your right leg and slid it up between his thighs, brushing against his sweatpants and feeling his hard-on for a hot second before you jammed your leg into your chest and lifted it out, pressing your thigh against your torso and raising your calf into the air. You turned your head to the left, letting out an exasperated huff.

“There. You see it?”

Shit, this position was embarrassing for some reason. You could feel cold air on your dripping pussy. Maybe he couldn’t see or something. You lifted your right arm to wrap around your thigh, pressing it down against your breasts since Jungkook wasn’t saying anything.

“That was the sexiest thing I’ve ever seen in my life,” Jungkook breathed.

“Okay, going to put my leg do–”

You gasped, suddenly feeling Jungkook’s fingertips touch your heated core, smearing your juices around the lips, his hot breath against your ear as he touched you. You shuddered as he stroked your folds, your name on his lips, his lips kissing your ear.

“Had to touch you,” he whispered against your neck, tone desperate. “I’m sorry, I just had to touch that beautiful pussy, all wet and slopping for me.”

Your eyelids fluttered as his middle finger found your clit, pressing on it. “J-Jungkook… That’s my…”

He chuckled deep in his throat. “Yeah? That’s your what?”

Slow, lazy circles, pushing it around, moan leaving your lips. “My c-clit…”

“Want me to touch it?” Jungkook purred. “Want me to handle your pleasure?”

But he as already touching it, nursing the sensitive bundle of nerves and rousing your lust, igniting it and setting it on fire.

“Y-yes…”

He kissed down your neck, whispering softly, licking your collarbones. “You trust me? You trust me with this pretty, perfect, hot, sexy, fuckable body?”

You arched your neck, giving him more access as he ran his pink lips all over, rubbing your clit, mouth on your throat. Your whole body shook, hips rolling into his finger.

“Y-yes…”

His breath so electrifying that you could barely focus, barely speak as Jungkook’s other hand came up behind your head, long fingers burying into your hair, holding tight, so tight it almost hurt, teeth nipping at your skin.

“Want to mark you,” he mumbled. “Want to give you a big fat hickey you can’t explain, want to bruise you so bad you’ll be staring at it for weeks, thinking about my lips on you, remembering my teeth gave you that.”

He pressed another finger to your clit, increasing the pace, and all you could do was hiss out a yes, a burning yes, a pleading yes, please, Jungkook, whining as his teeth sank into the spot where your shoulder and neck connected, sucking hard, his tongue licking away the prickling pain. His hips rolled into your thigh, his hard cock pressing against you, straining against his pants.

Jungkook moaned into your skin, so hot, so intense, rubbing your aching clit faster, harder, more urgently. Sucking and humping your leg as the feeling of his teeth and his fingers overwhelmed you, one hand clutching his shirt and one hand curled into your sheets as your thighs shook, trying to close but unable to because Jungkook was so strong, so there, so overpowering that you could only lay there and take it, take it as his name poured out of you in a breathless wail, throwing your head back as you felt your pussy clench around nothing, your juices becoming slicker, thicker, the scent of your orgasm staining the air.

He shoved the two fingers inside you and unlatched his mouth, moaning with you as he felt you squeeze his fingers, pumping you in long, slow strokes, all the way to his knuckles. You whimpered, tightening your core and Jungkook moaned again, eyes closed, his hair in disarray as you fucked his hand, clamping your hands on his right forearm, gasping at the feel of his muscle. Pussy throbbing around his fingers, hips meeting his knuckles over and over.

His eyes opened, watching your fuck yourself with his hand, an almost bored expression on his features, but you didn’t care because you felt him flex his fingers and his arm, telling you to continue, telling you he liked it.

“I thought you were going to let me do it.” Jungkook’s voice was low, trying to stay even despite his shallow breathing. “Have to control everything, don’t you?”

You caught your lower lip in your teeth, eyes moving to his face, his handsome, angular face with his black hair curled around his forehead and his cocked eyebrow, smirk on his lips.

“I’m not in control,” you panted. “Your forearm is…”

Jungkook flexed it under your hand and you moaned pathetically, breath hitching.

His smirk grew wider.

“It’s getting you off touching it.”

You swallowed, close, so close and Jungkook was taunting you and for some reason you couldn’t tell him to shut up, because he kept tensing his arm and it was so fucking hot that you really were going to orgasm.

“Say it,” he purred, breathing your name. “Tell me you like my forearm.”

Your eyes shifted down to his arm in your hands, the tiny angry face tattoo in his inner elbow frowning at you.

“I fucking love it, Jungkook,” you gasped. “Fuck, I love your delicious, sexy-as-fuck forearms.”

He grinned and began to thrust his fingers into you, fast, so fast you couldn’t even fathom how he could be that fast like a fucking vibrator, sending torrents of pleasure through you and his arm was so hard and his skin so soft that your eyes rolled back into your head, moaning his name far too loud. Jungkook placed a hand over your mouth and you screamed into it, liquid gushing down your thighs, but he didn’t stop, he kept going until you felt it again, pussy throbbing, back-to-back, eyelids fluttering, nails digging into his arm as the crescendo slammed into you, taking your breath and senses away, lost only in the feeling of Jungkook’s secure presence above you.

He slowed, breathing hard. Gently, carefully pulling his fingers out of your pulsating pussy, gasping as he removed his hand. You vaguely heard Jungkook place his fingers in his mouth, sighing wantonly at your taste.

“You taste so good,” he whispered around his fingers. “Fuck, so sweet and thick and delicious.”

Your brain could not compute what the fuck was happening. Did Jungkook just give you three mind-blowing orgasms in a row after you exploded at him and admitted to thinking about him while masturbating?

Holy shit.

He pressed his face into your hair, inhaling your scent.

You swallowed thickly.

“Jungkook, do you, ah… want something too?” you asked quietly.

You heard him snicker. “If I take my clothes off, I’m going to want to put my dick in you.”

“… I’m cool with that.”

“I thought a dildo was the same as a dick?”

You cleared your throat. “Ah… Well, I didn’t think you’d want to put a dick in me.”

Jungkook laughed. “If I had five dicks, I’d put them all in you.”

“Erm… mathematically speaking, that doesn’t really work…”

“Shut up.”

Jungkook sat up, looking down at you with a smile. The same smile he always had, but a little different now, because he didn’t have to hide his attraction to you anymore.

“You really let me put it in you?”

You narrowed your eyes. “With a ninety-eight percent chance, only.”

His smile became mischievous. “That’s not one hundred percent.”

You puffed your cheeks.

“I’ll take the two percent chance for you and only you, Jungkook.”

He grinned and turned around, throwing himself to the end of the bed where his jeans were barely holding on. Fishing through the pockets, retrieving the foil packet from the back pocket. You blinked at him.

“How long has that been–”

Jungkook gave you a silencing look. “I bring a new one every time I come over, in hopes you become drunk enough to sit on my dick.”

You blinked at him. “What.” Not a question, just you stating it.

“Because you’re paranoid.”

You frowned. “I’m not–”

He launched himself over the bed and silenced you with a kiss, deep and longing. You leaned into it, breathing softly, tongue against his, pressing back against him. Jungkook drew back slowly, thumb on your cheek. Eyes looking into yours, careful and tender.

“I don’t want you to worry,” he said against your lips. “I’ll do anything you want. I know it’s not easy for you. I know you’re not ready for the million babies I want from you.”

“I can’t have a million babies. It’s not scientifically possible,” you interjected.

Jungkook narrowed his eyes. “Can you just let me have one romantic moment?”

“Erm, sorry.”

“You want me to have a damn vasectomy or something? Because I’ll fucking do it. That shit’s reversible.”

“No, that kind of requires more time and I’m pretty horny for your dick right now. Condom will do.”

He sighed, rolling his eyes. “You are a shitty sub.”

“I will do better after I’ve had the dick.”

Jungkook straightened and yanked his black t-shirt over his head. “No, you won’t.”

Your eyes roamed over his toned chest. Damn, he was ripped. Maybe he was insecure about you being hot or something, but you were certainly benefiting. “You never know?”

Jungkook sent you a pained look and pressed a hand to your chest, shoving you back into your bed. “I’ve known you way too long to believe those words coming out of your mouth.”

You were going to reply, but he ran his hand over your chest, inhaling sharply as he brushed against your nipples. He ran his fingers over them, squeezing a little. You whined, trying to get more, but Jungkook pressed his palm down on your breast, breathing hard.

“Listen, woman, I’m about to explode in my damn underwear. Stop sounding so sexy this instant.”

Your eyes found his, pupils blown wide, lips pursed, and jaw tight. Your lips parted a little, tongue peeking out, a soft moan of his name emitting from your throat. You saw a muscle in his eyebrow twitch. He looked like he wanted to throttle you, at least a little bit.

You grinned.

Jungkook narrowed his eyes.

“You are lucky you’re cute,” he muttered. “And lucky I want to be in this pussy more than I want to be alive.”

“Don’t you ne–”

Jungkook planted his hand on your mouth. “The only words I want to hear out of you are, “Fuck me harder” or my own name, you got that?” he snarled, pressing his hand into your face for emphasis.

You nodded quickly.

He sighed, almost in relief, and yanked his pants and underwear down, wincing. There was a large wet spot on his boxer briefs, strings of pre-cum clinging as he pushed it down his muscular thighs.

“You made me a giant mess,” he muttered, eyes flickering up to you. “What do you have to say?”

You blinked at him and gave him a thumbs up.

He grinned. “You do know how to listen.”

In truth, you couldn’t say anything because you were breathlessly staring at Jungkook’s thick cock, red head glistening with pre-cum, dripping everywhere. You slid down quickly, startling him, and wrapped your lips around the head, moaning as his strong taste invaded your mouth. He hissed, gritting his teeth as your tongue swiped around, licking his length all over, feeling the veins and contours, memorizing them.

“F-fuck,” he gasped. “You wanted to clean me up that bad?”

Your eyes traveled up his abs, his pecs, his neck, to his face, giving him your best imploring look. He smirked, placing a hand on your forehead, and gradually, with great effort, pulled out of your tight mouth. Tight because you sucked in your cheeks, not wanting to let him go, but Jungkook was stronger than you. You frowned, but he shooed you away.

“I allowed it this one time. Now back to your spot.”

You backed up, tsking as you watched him roll down the condom, groaning as it covered him.

“I’m actually glad I have this fucking condom,” Jungkook muttered, glaring at you.

You couldn’t say anything, so you spread your legs. His eyes dropped down and he bit his lower lip, crawling to you, grabbing your thighs. Placing himself right in front of your soaked entrance, staring down at your pussy as he guided himself, sinking into you.

“Holy fuck,” he gasped, squeezing his eyes shut.

You moaned, feeling Jungkook’s cock stretch you out, so different from a silicone dildo or multiple fingers, because it was Jeon Jungkook praying for air as you clenched around his length, his cries of pleasure as he rocked his hips into you. Those long nights with your vibrator and his Instagram open on your phone were incomparable to his cock molding to your walls, his hard hips finally hitting your thighs, all the way in, and it was so good that you throbbed around him, shuddering.

“J-Jungkook…” you pleaded.

“I know,” he panted, hands gripping your knees tight. “I know, but give me a second to appreciate this pussy, holy fuck.”

He jerked his cock inside you and you cried out, definitely crushing your sheets, but Pikachu had seen a lot by now and there was only going to be more.

Jungkook finally began to slide out and push back in, groaning, starting slow and deep because quite frankly he needed to last more than five seconds and your pussy was not letting up. You had too much control over your vaginal muscles and he was too into you to not be hugely turned on by it, shoving your legs up higher so he could go deeper, feel more of you surround him and massage his length.

“H-harder…” you whimpered. “Please, Jungkook, fuck me harder…”

And how could Jungkook say no to that? Begging so perfectly, with just the right amount of desperation, and you didn’t even know it was driving him insane, because he knew normally you were so wound up, always worrying about being perfect, always worrying about doing the right thing, but now you were unraveling on his cock as he bent down and put more force into it, pounded you harder, watching the ecstasy in your eyes, your mouth opening and tongue peeking out, hot breath in his face. Knuckles white as you clutched the sheets, pleasure radiating up his length as you came with a cry, his name, his name on those perfect lips, lips he always watched with envy, wondering who had them, wondering who was so lucky to capture them.

And now it was just him, just him and you, and his hips slapping into your hips, pussy nearly choking his cock, but it felt so good, so fucking euphoric as you fucked him back, raising your hips to meet his, loud, wet, and lewd, probably causing a ruckus next door. But neither of you cared, your names mixing together, your eyes staring to Jungkook’s piercing brown ones, hot pleasure radiating up your stomach, your chest, to your head and there was no one else.

No one else but Jungkook’s name tumbling out of your mouth as the wave soared into you, pussy spasming as you came again, unsure at what number it was, but it was the one Jungkook wasn’t prepared for and he groaned, smacking into you one last time before you felt his cock throb and pulse against your walls, spilling into the condom. You gasped at the feeling, clenching around him, his right hand reaching over to grasp yours and hold it tightly, intertwining your fingers.

“W-wow…” you whispered breathlessly. “Nice cock.”

Jungkook burst out laughing. “You’re unbelievable.” He reached down and gingerly felt around in your dripping folds, finding the end of the condom and pulling out carefully.

“Fuck. It’s so much,” he gulped, brows knitted in worry.

You waved a hand. “It’s fine. I finished my period yesterday. Likelihood of you getting me pregnant is pretty low.”

Jungkook jerked his head towards you.

“Why the fuck didn’t you say that sooner?” he roared, slapping your leg. “I was scared shitless over here!”

You placed your hands over your ears. “So loud. Shut up, Jungkook.”

“No!”

--

masterpost

[undead-merman]

I saw your siren simeon headcanons (loved them btw) how about some of Siren!Mammon?

Thank you. And thank my editor they're going through the stockpile I have at an amazing pace.

🧜‍♂️Siren Mammon🧜‍♂️ as a yandere GN- Reader SFW

Appearance

Like other Sirens he’s unnaturally beautiful outside of the waters of the ocean. His sun kissed skin glowing in the sun’s light and without a flaw. His hair reminds you of fluffy clouds. His whole body screams of a perfect summer’s day.

His tail is a perfect match to his eyes. Going from a dark and deep ocean blue from his hips to a cyan like malachite and perfect golden yellow at the tip. His Caudal fin is in the traditional fork shape that many would picture mermaids to have, though much wider. His other fins are more feathered like having what looks like layers at different lengths.

And just like other siren’s this glamor melts away when he gets too excited or he’s gotten his hands on some treasure or some poor sailor. His perfect teeth become jagged and serrated, thorned fins and dangerously webbed claws are revealed. His beautiful colors melt away and become dark and muted like the clouds of a storm.

Lulling Ships and Sailors to Their Doom

Unlike others siren’s melodies which they craft as they grow older, his are not like a lullaby but a song of desire and want. The lyrics change to fit the greed of any who hear it, but all who hear it can’t help but push their friends off the ship to keep everything to themselves. He’ll make fights break out amongst the crew as his song sweeps over everyone until it leads to the ship sinking from the fights. He enjoys the bickering.

When all the chaos is over he collects from the sunken ship any kind of wealth or coveted item as well as some personal treasures. He cares more about the gold and gems they leave behind more than the meal he gets from the crew.

His top priority is bringing his loot back to his den, which is just a mile or two away from a busy pier. He likes to be closer to humans, the closer they are the less work he has to do swimming back and forth. There’s also the plus of finding dropped items from clumsy travelers. He’s found dozens of gold watches, diamond earrings, and many kinds of coins from all around the globe.

Every once in a while he’ll get into a slump where he wishes he could show off his collection. He doesn’t know why he gets like this and it frustrates him a lot. He’ll end up tossing a gem back into the pile and slap his tail angrily on the ground. He just wants to enjoy his treasure.

Spending Time with You

When he first met you by chance and you had no greed in your soul for him to draw upon he was floored, pissed even. He couldn’t believe this! He grabbed you and dragged you back to his den, almost drowning you. He tried everything to get his song to work on you and nothing he did worked. You were the first human to ever resist something like that.

Then anger turned to fascination! How rare was it for a human like yourself to resist a siren’s song! This had to be the rarest treasure in the world and not only that but you could talk back! Even cooler! And from then on his days revolved around getting to know this new treasure of his.

You’ve already seen his true form so he won’t exactly hide it but he knows humans are scared by monsters so he keeps up the glamor if it makes you more comfortable. But if you do not mind his form he would be thrilled.

He shows off all of his collections to you and tells you stories of how he got them. Bragging about how he was able to hypnotize ships filled with hundred if not thousands. Sometimes it seems like he’s exaggerating the numbers to get you to be more impressed, but if you ever bring it up he’ll get all angry like a child and flop his tail while all bright red.

He’ll ask to hear some of the places you’ve seen, how you grew up, and just silly experiences you’ve encountered. He’ll pick up on everything you say trying to figure out how you became so resistant to his song. But after learning your interests he’ll bring you nice things that you like, trying to bring your favorite food if he can, or neat things with your favorite color. He’s not trying to impress you, he just knows you like it and thought it would be nice to give it to you since he kind of stole you.

Ever since he’s added you to his collection he doesn’t get frustrated anymore and even enjoys your company more than those shiny rocks now. Sometimes he wonders if you somehow managed to charm him to get him to think like that. When you laugh or smile his heart seems to beat faster. And he doesn’t plan on letting that go anytime soon.

Dark Tendencies

He just found something amazing and he doesn’t plan on letting that go, ever. You make him feel secure and make everything okay with just a smile. He refuses to let anyone else have such a treasure. He’ll make sure it’s impossible for you to leave his den keeping you trapped and forced to rely on him.

You can scream or yell all you want. He'll remind you that despite being so close to a human settlement there's no way of being found so just accept it and let him take care of everything. He’ll bring as much tasty food as you could need and bring you warm clothes he found. He just wants you to need him like he needs you.

Humans or other siren’s are just in the way of your happiness. He’s proactively hunting down anything within a certain distance of his den so they don’t even get the chance to see you, hear you, or even smell you. He’ll tear and shred anything to pieces. He’ll make sure to clean up as quickly as he can before coming home and asking for a welcome home hug.

If you don’t indulge him with your cute smiles or your warm hands petting him he’ll throw a fit and sulk in the water staring at you until you do. Slowly decreasing the food he gives you until you snuggle him or indulge him. He pesters you the whole time too, asking if you're ready to give up and just give him what he wants.

Misc Stuff

He absolutely adores your hands and loves how warm they are compared to him and the cold ocean around him. He acts like a cat sometimes and pushes his face into your warm hands for head pats and will shout at you all flustered if you were to mention it, but it wouldn’t stop him from doing it.

He’ll sleep wrapped around you, he enjoys your smooth body compared to his rough and thorny body. He makes sure to put a soft towel against him so he doesn’t jab you as he sleeps. He sleeps on the shore for you but always has to go back to the water after he wakes up since he feels all dry.

Mammon has a lot of treasures from around the world and mythical items thought to have been lost forever but he’s not even aware of what they are. He just tosses them into a pile. He simply likes the shiniest and flashiest items.

[hangezoeenthusiast]

Minecraft

m!reader

pronouns:he/him

fluff

person: sapnap (im not going to use his real name, since he is uncomfy with people using it)

words: 1530

warnings: cursing, yelling

you were at sapnap's house on his bed, watching him stream and play minecraft. he was trying to speedrun minecraft. "hey babe, what'cha doing?" he asked. "just watching you." you replied.

"you wanna come over here?"

"but what about the face cam."

"chat could give less of a shit, or i too."

"ok then babe, let me just get some water."

you went to the kitchen to get a glass of water, then went back to the room. you grabbed one of sapnap's extra chairs and sat next to him. "hey chat, how you doing." chat spammed y/n so many times, you could barely see anything else in there.

"hey my boyfriend, how you doing." a dono said

"im doing good y/nismyboyfriend, good name btw, how are you?"

"heyyyy, your MY boyfriend." sapnap whined. "it's ok baby, im yours and your mine." chat spammed simp, then sapnap buried his head in your heck. "y/nn, make chat stop bullying me." "chat stop bullying my WONDERFUL boyfriend." you emphasized.

after that little situation, you just sat in your chair, zoned out, and just watched. "babe, hey babe, baby are you ok?" sapnap asked. you jumped at the sound of his voice, "sorry, i zoned out, what were you saying." "damn, im not that important to you then that you zoned out." sapnap pouted. "oh shut up you big baby."

"excuse me, don't make me fight you bitch." "sapnap, do you realize i took karate as a kid right?" "that was years ago." "so sapnap, i can still beat your ass with a blindfold." he looked shocked and amazed at the same time. "ok then." he said shyly.

you looked content (like this face 😏), "so what you needed sapnap?' "oh yeahhh, do you want to play minecraft on here?" you were absolutely shit at minecraft, you already tried once, you weren't going to try again. (flashback to the conversation you had with sapnap the first time you ever played minecraft)

"sapnap, how do you move on this thing, this is so complicated" "it's just because your a boomer y/nnn, here, its wasd." "EXCUSE ME SIR IM NOT A BOOMER, APOLOGIZE RIGHT NOW." "NO I WON'T APOLOGIZE, YOU APOLOGIZE." "WHY DO I HAVE TO SAY SORRY, YOU'RE THE ONE WHO WRONGED ME." "AHHHHHH" you guys are so weird :/ /j

"no, im not, im shit at it, you made fun of me plenty of times, no, no times infinity." "come on baby, that was what, like 1 time." "YEAH, ONE TIME TO MANY." "pwease, for me." he whispered. you looked at his pouty face and didn't crack (MOMMA DIDNT RAISE NO SOFTY /j). "ok then, but the second you make fun of me, i will beat you up so bad that-" sapnap interrupted you, "THANK YOU SO MUCH BABE, but i wont guarantee that i won't make fun of you." he got up, put you in his chair, and standed behind you. "now y/n, the last time you played, you sucked absolute balls, so NOW i will guide you through everything, yaknow, be your sensei." you made a straight face, and looked behind you, seeing him look at you as well.

you had a staring contest. both eyes were locked, eyes squinting, trying to withstand the others. his blinked first, "YES I WON, WHAT'CHA GONNA DO SNAPCHAT, WHAT'CHA GONNA DO?"

"just forget everything that happened in the last 10 seconds, let's do this thing." he guided you towards everything, like moving around, crafting, fighting zombies and skeletons, and even breaking blocks. you were doing fairly well, but there was one, no two, no three things you absolutely sucked shit at that you HAD to master. one was mlg watering, two was building a nether portal, and the last was fighting the ender dragon.

you goal was to beat the game and make new records ;), well, you did, but not without some challenges.

1. mlg water

you crafted a bucket and went to the nearest river/sea. you filled up the water bucket. "hey sapnap, what do we do next?" "next, my darling y/n, we shalt try to mlg." "so what do we do?" "we first, tower up." you pulled out your stacks of blocks, and stacked all the way up to the sky. "so what do i do next?"

"so pull out your water bucket, and then when you almost hit the ground, place the water on you." you jumped of the tower, and failed mlg. it was so ridiculously bad, that goddamn satan wouldn't let you in hell for that little stunt. "NOOO, WHAT THE FUCK, I PLACED IT BELOW ME." "You didn't do it good enough." "SHUT THE FUCK UP SAPNAP."

2. nether portal

obviously if you failed mlg, you would SUCK at making nether portals. "since you fucking sucked at mlg, lets try making a nether portal, it's kinda easier, but still hard. so what you do is make that shape there" "oh no, do it there." "nooo y/n, you're doing it wrong, do it that way."

you made a nether portal, but you obviously messed up, there was cobblestone everywhere. you pickaxed it, but that didn't come with a good thing. "NOOOO, FUCK, WHY WAS THERE LAVA." yeah, that's right, under the cobblestone was lava, and you fell in it, barely salvaging any of your items. well that attempt went horribly

3. ender dragon

after getting to the nether, getting blaze rods and converting them into blaze powder, trading with hoglins to get ender pearls, not having enough ender pearls from the hoglins, killing endermen and dying from them while getting ender pearls, crafting eye of enders, finding the stronghold, placing the eye of enders in the stronghold frame, while dying along the way, you finally got into the end.

finally all this suffering and mocking from sapnap would end, and you would finally beat the game. but, obviously, with you having little to no minecraft skills, it came with A BUNCH of problems, like destroying the crystals, making sure you wouldn't anger endermen, avoiding the dragon of dealing damage to you, and flying into the void.

1. destroying the crystals

sapnap ordered you, "use your bow to destroy the crystals." you aren't and weren't no minecraft god, so you couldn't destroy all the crystals, but you did one of them tho 👍

so he gave you another try, to use blocks to climb the side of the pillars, and destroy the crystals that way. you died, to put it shortly and bluntly. "AHHHH," you screamed. you got exploded by the crystals. that happened with EVERY. SINGLE. CRYSTAL you happened to try to destroy.

but eventually, you destroyed all the crystals.

2. endermen

after you destroyed the crystals, you had the task off not angering the endermen by eye contact. that went horribly wrong. sapnap had the courage to tell you that you couldn't look them in the eyes, and that you would anger them if you would. "WHY ARE THEY CHASING ME," you shouted. "y/nn calm down, just kill the ones that are angry at you."

"WHAT DO YOU MEAN, ALMOST ALL OF THEM ARE CHASING ME." you overaggerated. "no, it's almost 3 dude, just kill them."

you killed them, and then you had the task of the dragon.

3. the dragon dealing damage

sapnap took control of shooting the dragon in the air with the bow and arrows. when the dragon would come down to the middle, you would hit their head (im doing the enderdragon as nonbinary, yaknow, they are a lesbian, nonbinary lesbians are vaild :D).

4. the void

the last thing you had trouble with in the end was the void. the darkless pit that leads to nothing except death. the dragon was throwing you around like a little puppet, you doing nothing except being flung around the place. "FUCK, FUCK YOU DRAGON," you screeched. the dragon was getting on your last nerve.

after all the trouble,and death, you finally beat the dragon. "YESSS, YESS, FUCK YOUR DRAGON, SUCK ON MY 10 IINCH DICK." sapnap cheered you on through your little victory speech. "bye chat, imma stop streaming now, since it has been 6 hours, we need to go to sleep." "bye, chat, love you guys."

you and sapnap ended the stream, feeling exhausted. you went to do your skin care routine, and found sapnap waiting for you in bed. "how was the stream y/n, did you enjoy it?" "yeah, i enjoyed it, only the dying part i hated."

"it's ok, babe, we can try it another time, maybe next time you won't die as much, at least you made a new record."

"what record sap?"

"the record of dying the most in minecraft." you slapped him around his head, not finding his joke funny. "hey, don't hit me, i'm fragile."

"sorry you big baby." you responded. you both got under the blanket, and snuggled (i don't know why, but the word snuggled is enchanting), huddling together, and basking in each others warmth. even if you died 4,234 times in minecraft, at least you had your favorite person at your side while doing it.

[starcloaked]

🌻 <3

terraria time !! my favorite interest atm i’ll tell you abt the lore <3

i’ve liked terraria on and off for a long time but i’ve only recently gotten back into it w the final (maybe they say that every single time they make one) update n like holy shit!! even though you’re most likely only supposed to view the game through a boss fighting world destroying badass block game moment it’s very fun to try and piece together what is happening in this strange little world.

the main reason i like terraria much more than minecraft (other than well. you know) is the fact that there are real human npcs with direct personalities you can make houses for and talk to in the game!! they are not super fleshed out and most have a strictly vendor/gameplay purpose but i would be lying if i said i didn’t read their quotes page 2 times every day. we’re friends i know they’re video game characters but we know each other and have sleepovers on the weekends :] unfortunately the creators are a bit iffy and they fit into stereotypes so it’s important to recognize that but they’re very cool

oh wait um lore!! so there are two evils in the world depending on world generation, corruption and crimson. i always play in the corruption because . big worm boss and i love the music + the crimson is scary but Anyways they’re a way to violently enforce the balance between good and evil in the world, plagues that spread and overtake forests and deserts to the eventual destruction of them. many years ago, uhh cthulhu?? the squid guy from like a completely other series of lore’s writing? yeah that guy got blasted by some dryads and forced to back down temporarily w their power

so now some destructive big terror guy’s assorted body parts are wandering around, wreaking minor havoc as the god slowly regains his powers to smite the world once again. so you’ve gotta umm... not let that happen and instead fight his like. eye and bones and brain and spine and then some guy at the very end called moon lord who may be related to him but maybe not? and there are also these assorted bosses such as the queen bee and plantera (her boss theme slaps btw) who don’t seem to be directly related to him but when you defeat plantera the spread of corruption/crimson slows down so is she connected to the world evils in some way?? also there’s a whole biome after you defeat the wall of flesh (??? yeah i don’t know either) that is supposed to be the complete embodiment of purity. but it’s full of unicorns and fae and glowing pink men who drop the rarest fucking item in the GAME (0.2 percent. god .) and is ruled by a cruel empress who in the daytime can kill you in one shot no matter what

i think the most confusing but oh so very fun character-wise is that to summon the . the wall yeah you have to throw the guy you spawn in the world with, your guide who leads you through the world n gives you tips and hints, into lava in actual hell?? the creators have sort of confirmed that he IS the world guardian (oh yeah. so ol mr brick wall is a guardian of the world and after you kill him the hallow and corruption fight for who becomes the new guardian i think?? fun) but the games internal lore directly conflicts with that soooo . not sure but him being secretly a primordial demon is funny i think

also there’s a guy in a bird mask later on that’s the second to last final boss. just some guy wearing a plague doctor mask and robe and casting evil wizard spells i think if i asked him politely even he would steal my gender as if it were a soul. put it in davy jones locker idk i’m not picky...

OH and i think my favorite one of the funny npcs is the zoologist. first of all there’s no going wrong with a fox girl but second she’s just nice and spunky :] prime bestie material she tells you about funny little creatures you find in the world with cute lil quotes and sells you town pets it’s adorable. i think all the npcs have a group chat where they roast me like i’m in thr truman show and my life saving the world is reality tv

here are some ducks closing statement um fun game i wish p*d**p** never played it and the creators stayed off reddit and it makes me lose slight control and make me go apeshit. like any good game should <3

[cruddyborderlandstheories]

Debuff Zane Build

i am tired of not seeing this build in all the zane build videos i watch so im sharing it here because its stupid fun bc u run fast and kill faster. it’s not meta, but its fun as fuck and u have a lot of damage and survivability with it. I’ve completed M4 Slaughter Shaft with it- haven’t tried on M10 yet but i have faith. p.s its 4 am pls have mercy if there’s spelling mistakes.

what ur gonna need is a band of sitorak, zheitseiv’s eruption, a seein’ dead, and the piss grenade. everything else is fair game, whatever u want. try to get it to have the sntl cryo anoint bc good. but u must have the 4 main items for this to work perfectly (it also somewhat works with a low level Frozen Heart bc best shield in the game but you will die a lot more)

also i need a fucking name for this build help

oh god oh fuck i forgot i was playing through the handsome jackpot dlc again

oki im ready to party

this is my current loadout

sometimes i switch the reg Q-System for a kaoson or a nighthawkin if i need ammo (OP QSystem is... OP but not as fun as a tracking grenade QSystem so i don’t care for it) and maybe the brainstormer for a reflux if many shielded enemies (i prefer the brainstormer over the reflux atm. so try for a brainstormer!!)

3rd slot, that’s a monarch which used to be a dictator b4 it got a straight upgrade. I actually don’t use the bipod unless im in a boss fight and don’t need to move fast. usually violent momentum and violent violence cover the dps loss

ur first 3 gun slots honestly don’t matter much. I have my reasons for using them, but you can use whatever u want i think, so long as its a strong weapon (bc unfortunately a lot of weapons are not scaled for m10). u dont HAVE to use the monarch or the Q system or the brainstormer. I recommend them, cuz theyre fun, but u don’t gotta if u wanna swap em out for a a kaoson or a yellowcake or a sandhawk or smth

the last gun is my zheitsev’s eruption. This bad boy, when u reload, shoots out homing balls of debuffery. So every enemy that gets hit with these gets a debuff. I have tried this with the needler but I prefer Zheitsev’s bc it can hit more enemies and once and takes less time. this gun only goes to Blane (ur clone). 

for the skill trees we have no points in under cover even tho brainfreeze is the best skill in the gaaaaame

explanations: 

really the hitman tree is p self explanatory, u wanna go fast as fuck boiii. My band of sitorak does not have the +15 movespeed while zoomer is active anoint (it has the break shield amp anoint, which is p okay. want movespeed, but a nice human from the reddit gave me this sitorak so i didn’t have to farm). u want drone delivery bc Blane will NOT be throwing grenades. If you try to make him throw grenades with the seein’ dead he will ONLY throw grenades and never fire his gun, meaning he’ll never reload. it’s a nightmare. anyway. u want the piss grenade (ideally with the +25% damage on thrown anoint). im not looking forward to regrinding this when they finally mayhem buff grenades.

we put one point into playing dirty because we want those extra shots and honestly with the amount of times seein’ dead can proc ur kill skills you’ll have it more often than not

we also have points in good misfortune for that sweet sweet uptime (which btw can be infinite using the brainstormer/reflux bc it is essentially a redistributor without the need for ur barrier) the monarch/dictator also does it justice

for Blane u DON’T WANT praemuntis. we want blane reloading as often as gotdamn possible. now unfortunately my seein’ dead gave me a +weapon mag size roll (im actually not sure if this affects blane, but im assuming it does) but it does have the amazing +5 donnybrook so I’m taking it anyway. I am so not looking forward to regrinding a good class mod when they finally release action skill buffs for them. i cri. i actually hear 3 points in donnybrook and 2 in violent violence is p good (or 1 in violent violence 1 in playin dirty) so maybe grinding won’t be so bad. maybe i’ll finally get a +weapon damage roll

u can grab 1 point in ducttape mod and put 4 points into borrowed time if you want. it doesn’t really matter. i current have 5 in borrowed time and 3 in pocket full of grenades (for some reason??? usually i only put 2 in.). U can do that and use those extra points for either ducttape mod or more points in playing dirty. 

u NEED quick breather. This skill has a STUPID interaction with the band of sitorak shield because of how quickly it recharges. I’m talking, the instant you swap with Blane, you have full shields and so does he. It’s dumb, I love it. Use it to get out of trouble.

so im probably gonna need to explain why i have 3 points in trick of the light: im a cryo slut. That’s it. put those wherever you want, just make sure you can get Double Barrel. i’ve seen builds where people actually go for brainfreeze, i might try that next time i respec.

Double barrel will make it so blane can use the zheitsev’s eruption and debuff your enemies for you. it’s worth it.

so the augments u want are these:

SCHADENFREUDE. because band of sitorak has such a tiny capacity, ur shield is constantly up. If its not, it’s constantly breaking from full capacity. this does have a fun effect with the amp shield break anoint, but mainly i like it for the 25% damage buff whenever it breaks. its a tradeoff for damage, ur constantly swapping between max shields and more damage, so its actually p constant survivability and damage over the long run.

i grab doppelbanger bc blane sometimes gets stuck in the floor and/or i don’t feel like running all the way back. i wouldn’t recommend getting which one’s real or digital distribution only bc u want him alive as much as possible. u can also get binary system instead of doppelbanger, its up to you

for Zoomer u want bad dose for the movement speed and (sometimes) static field (only if the enemies have shields). this is so if blane goes down or he isn’t taking damage, zoomer can refill ur shields. if the enemies won’t have shields usually i grab winter’s drone or boomsday depending on how i feel.

im actually gonna try to see if i can’t grab brain freeze. hang on. i know trick of the light is frowned upon for most people so lemme just respec. (im sorry i just love the vibes it gives me it’s like HAHA you thought that was me? no!!! boop. and then they’re ice sculptures and man i love h2o i wish emma had frozen more people the only people she really freezes are Greg and Miriam and honestly she doesn’t even kill Greg smh. (Greg is dr denman’s assistant. greg is highkey god.) I do like what she did to Mirami, the fucking implications that YES these teenage girls ARE powerful enough to instakill people, they just don’t out of the kindness of their hearts. Rikki was badass that episode too. actually i love the episode where rikki almost boils a dude alive for making a fool of her with ILLEGAL F I S H and burns people using steam from a pipe. rikki is my favorite mermaid- she knew what was u p. I wish mako mermaids was as badass as h2o was. and the cartoon. god imagine the cartoon violence. sigh. let them use their op superpowers to be SUPERHEROES. like in h2o au i have baron flynt puppeteer people to their deaths from Thor bc he has cleo’s powers like why couldn’t she do that to someone. Like dr denman “lmao bye bitch” or even charlotte (who imho wasn’t bad until cleo started being rude to her. cleo was 100% at fault that season). it wouldn’t have killed her!!! ... instantly. probably. ive never seen avatar in full but i did watch the blood bending episode as a child and as i understand it that’s frowned upon but hey. CAN BELLA TURN PEOPLE INTO JELLY?? harry potter 🅱oneless arms... my god.)

anyway, respeccing. 

there goes all my money. rip.

so i think im gonna have to live with the slower reload speed (sob) but yes u can in fact get brain freeze with this build. lemme show...

so ye in the event u just can’t live without freezing people (i know the feeling) feel free to do this. imma play with this for a bit and see if i can live with slower reload. I actually depend on the 100% cryo with zoomer active for all my cryo damage. i also use an ice breaker so they freeze fairly easy (but only on mobs. on bosses u want the snowdrift or something else)

this build isn’t really meta and u might have trouble doing a solo run of true takedown on m10... bc its true takedown on m10, but honestly it’s fun as F U C K. you CAN do it, but it’s not no thoughts head empty like barrier-redistrubutor/yellowcake zane can be so u gotta be on TOP of ur SHIT. i love it. running around killing stuff. it’s fun. i also love teleporting. it’s my FAVORITE THING. I STILL GET GIDDY OVER IT BECAUSE IT’S SO FUN. ask my friends, they will tell you, sometimes i’ll just start gushing over how much fun it is to teleport even though i’ve played zane since release. just. GFDGHKJGDFK so much fun. i just... b o o p. god i love this game. i took a break to play assassin’s creed odyssey (fun sneaky beaky game, pretty awful dialogue) so DAMN i missed this. 

here’s a link to a video I took on athenas (my favorite area to run. it’s this game’s bloodshot stronghold!) this is the playlist i listen to while playing Zane. i keep swapping songs during play bc sometimes they don’t fit my vibe or i get tired of them lol (spotify control is hooked to my 4th and 5th mouse buttons so i don’t have to stop playing) i forgot where my shock sandhawk was in my inventory, is what i use to demolish traunt. i was so scared i threw it in my bank earlier on sanc-iii lol (also yes i still slap blane’s ass. it’s to encourage him to kill)

and here’s a link to the save + everything I had on me at the moment (including the stuff i picked up in the vid in case u want it lol) cuz im lazy and don’t feel like clearing out my inventory. some of these are only m4-9. which ones? it is a mystery. you’ll know when the new update releases ;) (no but actually im so hype for mayhem level on the item cards. finally. FINALLY!!!)

why is this video taking so long to upload. hynnnggggg

oh god is that the sun

[bugsnchats]

ML Theory time: Battle-ready!

I was thinking about Chloe and how she pulled some serious moves on Maruya! and im like ..HOW? How is she suddenly good at fighting baddies? 

Now WE all know that the Miraculous grant their user enhanced abilities e.g Agility, speed... and protects them from environmental hazards and obstacles e.g. Ondine, Startrain, Frozer...but despite all this help that doesn't account for the fact that they keep on par with superpowered Akumas and a few battles with Hawkmoth directly. (BTW Gabriel is in this same boat, so is Nathalie!). 

So here is my head fic of how our Miracu-team and Baddies keep themselves battle-ready!  

Marinette: After she accepted her fate as being the new Ladybug, she is often watching youtube videos of fighters and martial artists. Alt: When it's movie time with the Dupain-Chengs, Marinette always wants to watch Bruce Lee Movies...

Ex: Sabrine knows yoga (see Instagram) and may be taught Marinette some Tai chi moves as well. 

Adrien: (too easy) in addition to the fencing Adrien has been going to self-defense classes with his Mom since he was a tot. 

Alya: Definitely picked up moves from Nora. if Alya grew up similar to me, she’s been play fighting with her siblings since forever. Slap boxing may not have phased Nora but with enhanced strength, that slap will sting! EX: Imagine Rena Rouge slapping them akumas right out of their items. Plus don't tell me that Flute aint a beat-down stick~

Nino: He and Chris watch The Avengers ALL THE TIME. Avengers: Endgame is Chris’ favorite movie and he loves playing Captian America vs Thanos with his brother. Nino is often using Chris’ toy shied as a frisbee. 

Chloe: (the thought process that started it all.) Yes, she’s been doing Ballet FOREVER. but maybe she makes Sabrina watch old Ti-bo vids to laugh at the losers who did that back in the early 2000′s but is secretly taking notes. Alt: Jean-Pierre host an aerobics class at the hotel. Chloe hates sweating but likes to watch the classes. 

Gabriel: Emilie encourages him to go to SD classes with her (after all they are a famous power couple) but he stopped to focus more on the business after Adrien was born. (Adrien took his place as her exercise buddy when he got older).

Nathalie: She did months of research before accepting the job ofter from Gabriel. Plus once she realized that she would mainly be part of Adrien’s care team, She knew that she had to take some classes on non-lethal restraint to keep all those crazy teenage girls off of Adrien!! 

[justoneday-namjoonii]

JK  (I’m stalling...)

A/n: ok so I made this for myself because i mean the gif was too good not to use for something, it’s random. I’m legit trying to stall for midnight circus. Happy December btw🎄🎄🎄

Let’s go to the mall they said, we all need new winter outfits they said—so I tagged along to the never ending shopping crusade. Of course you decided to binge watch your favorite series last night and as a result of that you were dead tired. So, on the 5th store you stopped to get a cinnamon sugar soft pretzel with cream cheese and a drink. You purchased your clothes and took them to the car so you wouldn’t have to lug them all over the mall. So there you sat, slowing becoming part of the bench you sat on.

“Hey.” 

He came into your line of vision and you cringed—why must he come on the only day you decided to come to the mall. “How did you find me...” You relaxed back into your seat and he grabbed a piece of your pretzel, popping it into his mouth.

“I wasn’t looking for you, this is sheer coincidence.” He sighed, making himself comfortable right beside you. “What’re you doing here, you’re at the mall by yourself?”

“No,” You retorted, “are you?” 

“Nah, my mom is getting decorations for her little party thing.” He sighed. “I’m just tagging along.”

“Okay, so why aren’t you with her?”

“Got bored.” He grabbed another one of your pretzels and you scooted to the corner of the bench. 

“Unless you want your fingers dislocated one by one, I suggest you stop.” You threatened—if he wasn’t such a disgustingly little spawn of satan-child you might just share with him.

“Grr,” He mocked, standing to his feet and fluffing his hair, “calm down. She wants me to get a nice shirt for the party, help me pick one.” He grabbed your arm and started pulling you towards the store.

“WH- Why are you pulling me?!” You yanked against him and he had to audacity to laugh. “Jungkook, stop I’m-”

“She said I needed a women's eye to see if it looks good, I don’t know why, I have great taste.” you couldn’t argue with him on that. “You have nothing else to do, so come on.” You just followed him, deciding you’d go with him anyway—at least this would be entertaining.

He walked into the storefront and surveyed the land, you didn’t have time for his extra behind, you needed to get this finished and leave.

“Just pick a section.” You interrupted his train of thought, he just blew you off going off in the right and you followed behind him.

You thought shopping with your friends was exhausting, this child was picky—extremely picky.

“What about this one?-” You held up the eighth shirt.

“Too green, that green isn’t my color.” He mumbled, fumbling through the racks with an intense focused look. “Look for more neutral colors, like blues, white, black, red, nothing too bright...” It was crazy how he could switch like this—one minute he’s harassing you, the next he’s acting like innocence is all he’s ever known. 

“That’s the eighth shirt you’ve rejected.” You were irritated. “I’m leaving.” Of course you weren’t really leaving but even if you were he wasn’t gonna let you.

“I’ll pick, you evaluate.” That was fair enough.

“Fine.” You found a little stool near the shoe isle and you stationed there. He skimmed through the racks with intent to find the perfect item, you wished that item would just throw itself at him. Unbeknownst to you, he was watching you fondly, your eyes would follow some people in the store and also him. He had to admit, he was glad to see you, after all that’s happened he was sure you’d bow to never speak to him, but here you are—it was nice.

“Ooo, I like this” He pulled out nice top and held it up to himself in the mirror. “Baby, what’d you think?”

“Um, it’s a nice shirt.” You cocked your head to the side and tried to envision what it would look like on but you weren’t sure. “But I don’t know. Try it on, then I’ll decide.”

“Okay.” He began to unbutton his shirt and soon it was off and in your hands.

“What are you doing?!” You exclaimed, looking around to make sure no one was watching. “You can’t change out here.” You frowned at the fact that he found your protests against it amusing.

“Don't care.” He slipped the shirt on and you had to admit, he looked good. “What'd you think? You like it?” He knew you did, he just wanted to hear you say it.

“Yes, I like it, now go into the dressing room.” You quipped and he only smirked.

“Come here and feel how it fits.” That had to be the most obvious invitation to touch him and you harshly declined.

“Put your clothes back on and go in the changing room!” You hissed, trying not to be too loud, there were other costumers in the store.

“Go in with me.” You didn’t know if that was a question or a statement—either way your answer was no.

“No.” You snorted, was he serious? Did he really think that was going to happen here? In a store full of people that could catch you two in the same stall.

“If you don’t I’ll just embarrass you...” He threatened.

“Embarrass me? How?” His hand went straight for the rack of skimpy undergarments.

He opened his big mouth so those around could here him. “Oh but honey, I already bought you a pair, don’t you need clothes other than pant-” You instantly shot up and shoved him.

“Stop it!” You slapped his arm lightly. “I’ll go in with you, geez...”

He smiled from ear to ear and everything was annoying from there. You sat in the dressing room, shielding your eyes.

“Open your eyes.” He was wearing a different pair of shoes and a new pants. “Gosh, how do you resist me.” He sighed.

“I just do. It looks really nice your mom will like it.” You smiled as he posed in the mirror.

 Ring. Ring. Your phone was buzzing and you put it to your ear.

“Hello?”

“Where are you? We’re going by the food court.” Your friend spoke with a worried tone.

“In one of the stores, I’m coming now, see you guys.” And you hung up—you were saved by the ring tone.

“Welp, I gotta go.” You stood and and waited for him to move from the door. “Jungkook-”

He pressed a gentle kiss to your lips, not really forcing you to do anything—he just wanted to feel your soft skin again. You squirmed, trying to get away at first but you quickly found yourself resting your hand on his forearm—he’s missed this and to be honest you did too. “I didn’t think I’d miss it but I did...” He mumbled, finally pulling away from you with a little smirk. “I miss that baby, I bet you do to...”

You sighed. “Bye Kook-”

He grabbed your wrist. “Will you call me? I swear if you don’t I’m coming to your house for an explanation.”

“Yeah, maybe.” You smiled sweetly before leaving him in that dressing room alone—that maybe was definitely a yes. No mattter how hard you tried to stay away from him, fate always intertwined your paths.

[elsa-of-arrendelle]

If Destiel shippers are allowed to post why they ship Destiel, I am allowed to say why I don’t.

I’ll point out that, yes, I’m religious. I’m a Christian of the LDS church and I believe that marriage and sexual relations should be between a man and a woman. But that’s not the big reason I don’t ship Destiel (Heck, I think Cecil and Carlos are *neat* and freaking adorable). 

I don’t ship Destiel because of what it cancels from the characters, the healthiness of the proposed relationship, and the effect it’s had on the fandom over the years.

Destiel is a ship that began as a fanon ship and still is. The biggest promotion is fans on tumblr, the lip-service and stories are written by fans, the scenes are either drawn by or edited from available sources by fans. The writers clearly have no intent of making it canon and the actors (mainly Jensen cause he’s tired of the constant peppering) have said that Destiel does not exist in the show.

The character-destroying reasons I don’t ship Destiel:

There is a canonically straight man who watches soap operas, cleans, cooks, has worn pink satin panties, drinks flavored water, listens to kids, show empathy, cries, is unafraid to show affection to his male friends and family, mother-hens his friends and family, and listens to his own moral code. It bashes so many stereotypes it makes me want to cry of happiness. Turning Dean Bi changes “breaking useless gender roles and stereotypes” to “Oh, well yeah, he’s gay so that makes sense now.” and degrades how revolutionary his character already is against mainstream media.

There’s also an angel who doesn’t care about sexuality more than a person’s actions (a slap to Westboro Baptists) with no personal reasons for it other than his conscience. He is sweet and kind but can also be awe-inspiring and ruthless against his enemies. Has immense power but tries to use it to help people, even in small acts of service which takes down the idea that abilities are only useful if they’re out beating up bad guys over doing what you can no matter how small.

And I refuse to ignore Sam because he is not going to be demoted to a cheerleader for Destiel. Sam is kind, passionate, and endures immense hardships and is just as valid as Dean or Cas. He is his own powerhouse and while I’m certain that he supports his brother being happy and healthy in any relationship that Dean might choose, he shouldn’t be ignored or downsized as a character to make way for a new romance plot which will inevitably happen because guys, this is tv land. It always happens.

Meg. Megstiel was actually canon. Yet, during the same time that people were still trying to make it Destiel. Meg was literally making out with Cas and it was not one-sided. I have seen more romance - proper, healthy romance, mind you - and positive character development between these two than between Dean and Cas. Castiel would compliment her poetically and she had her pet-name for him and would fuss over him and cared for him when Dean didn’t because the Winchesters had their own problems to deal with.

^^^ Related to this but Destiel shippers have actually stolen a lot from Megstiel which is just messed up. The Pizza Man was based on Megstiel. The idea of having a “unicorn” is from Megstiel. Could you please use your own cliche’s in your fanfics and headcanons??? You can’t think of any that you have on your own?? That’s messed up. If you can’t write a story without stealing a competing ship’s motifs to pass as your own, you probably shouldn’t be writing and should be researching your own dang ship instead.

Dean and Castiel’s relationship would be toxic, in case you didn’t notice. It very nearly is right now. Cas is not and never will be Dean’s top priority. He’s still a priority for sure, but he’s not Sam. A healthy relationship has either each other on equal standing whether their first priority is each other or God. Goals, real-time emotions, or anything else too changeable are easily toppled. The reason Dean and Lisa worked out for a year was because Sam was not an option for Dean to prioritize anymore but the second he came back, the relationship started (sadly) to fall apart and Dean lost that stability. Unless Sam is also Cas’ #1 priority, their relationship is going to capsize faster than the Titanic without interference from Balthazar.

Not to mention, when Dean is stressed about losing Sam/failing the world/problems, he dishes out on Castiel. Cas is a strange character in that he is so old and has so much knowledge but he’s simultaneously like a child for the first several seasons because he’s missing so much social development. Two emotionally unbalanced factors in a relationship either balance each other out perfectly or they go up like a nuclear reactor. Sometimes it’s immediate and other times it builds up, but Dean and Cas initially clash and still clash on many major decisions. They don’t balance each other, they make the other alarmed by their unpredictability and recklessness.

Dean does care about Cas, but he’s not used to him or expressing concern to anyone beyond Sam, John, and Bobby. He’s bad at expressing negative feelings in an okay way. I’m not going to be the anti-shipper who paints Dean as some kind of abusive monster cause I love Dean and they twist him out of context too, but Dean has said some hurtful things and failed on the supportive front for Cas several times because Cas is not his main priority. Similarly, Cas has shown no interest in becoming a human, he enjoys human interaction and helping humans. He’s not some Ariel out to be ‘part of our world’ and S12 had him taking up Joshua on the deal to allow him back into Heaven. They have their own goals and those goals do not align in a way that gives room for a relationship. In short, their relationship will hurt each other, not support each other.

The fact that other characters refer to them as a couple is obsolete. If anyone has ever referred to you and someone else you know as an item, you understand that other people’s feelings on your emotions do not create a relationship, your individual feelings do. So that is not ‘proof’.

Something I want to point out to the fandom:

These are like the 3 most aggresively sexualized moments that the fandom has to work with when it comes to hardcore shipping over fluff. Usually these images are followed by fics of making out passionately after these moments. Fans have turned these moments into ‘magical’ events that scream UST and drama.

But I need you to understand something so listen up.

In each of these moments... DEAN IS FREAKING TERRIFIED. 

#1 +2. Castiel warning Dean to show him respect... because he brought Dean out of Hell and could throw him back in and Dean at this point is most definitely not close to coping with the trauma of those 40 years. He’s threatening him with his biggest trigger right here.

How Romantic. Sparks are flying, guys.

#3. Castiel is literally beating up Dean in an alleyway while yelling at him that he’s being selfish and weak and ignoring Cas’ sacrifices. By the end of this, Dean believes that Cas is just going to kill him.    Awwwwww...

#4. The angels have just been exposed at villians and Dean has yelled at Cas to make a decision. Several hours later, Cas appears and slams Dean into the wall and Dean is completely lost and alarmed by this and is unaware of what side Cas has chosen until after a moment of waiting for something to happen.

All of these moments have Dean afraid and/or believing that he is probably going to die. STOP TRYING TO TURN FEAR INTO AROUSAL. That is some serious rape-culture logic and it is messed up. It’s not “kinky”, it’s not “sexy”, it’s fear. If you can’t tell the difference, go see a psychologist.

Okay. Moving past that, the fandom has a lot of issues to deal with when it comes to context and character intent. Most of the scenes ‘supporting’ Destiel are regular pictures taken at a moment with 0 context provided. Others are gifs where something else is actually going on but it looks flirty when there aren’t words so it goes. Most shippers will also confess to not being very big Destiel shippers before they got into the fanfic because it changes their perspective and makes them look for a notice things that aren’t meant to be that way. I read some Bela/Dean stories and found myself shipping them for a while when I used to be die-hard Lisa or Jo.

Also worth mentioning: The argument of Cas being a “multi-dimensional wavelength of celestial intent and therefore isn’t really gay so there’s not a problem” is a double-edged sword with the fact that Castiel has never been with anyone not female (or even human btw it was a reaper and almost Hannah and Meg), but you’re also backspacing over the idea that if it was canon it would be a gay ship so... there goes the side opting for LGBTQA representation...what is your goal with that?

I don’t ship it because I’m tired of great characters being simplified, of great relationships being ignored, of made-up images and quotes being spread as though they were true, of looking up Supernatural and being hit by a wave of Destiel headcanons, of people insulting my favorite actors for both refusing to approve of the relationship and for trying not to shut down the relationship, of the level of tin-hatting required to insist that a character is bi because of the color shirt that they wear, and for people tagging every post - no matter how unrelated - as “Destiel”, I’m sick of it all. 

Spamming is the biggest reasons for Anti-Destiel blogs. Tagging everything with your ship name makes anyone who doesn’t ship it want to scream and hate you. This is not how you gain support.

I’m personally just very sick of feeling like I’m not really a part of this fandom because I don’t ship Destiel. But a lot of fans don’t. A lot of fans aren’t on tumblr, they don’t read your fanfic, they don’t consider Cas and Dean to be a couple, they just watch and like the show. That’s kinda what being a fan is. Making everything on Supernatural about Destiel is how you lose support for the show and the fandom.

Shipping despite this is fine. You want to, go for it. It won’t change the show that I enjoy, but please remember that not everyone will ship what you ship and spamming them or harassing them is pointless and rude.

[lalka-laski]

1. It’s Thursday at noon, where are you usually? I’ve actually been off work on Thursdays lately, so at that time of day I’m usually home getting ready for the day or doing chores or something. 

2. Who are the last people to send you a text message? Ryan 

3. What brand of shampoo is in your shower right now? Biolage. It’s the kind that my mom’s hairdresser used for her growing up so it has a very comforting, nostalgic smell to me! 

4. What are you listening to right now? Not a thing 

5. Do you watch MTV anymore? I don’t have cable. And I wouldn’t even if I did. Ok, that’s not true. I’d still watch some Jersey Shore... 

6. You need a new pair of jeans, what store do you go to first? Buckle has been my go-to for jeans lately. Although I do also like Aeropostale for jeggings. 

7. How do you feel about your hair? I just answered this in a previous survey. My hair is garbage right now! 

8. What time do you wake up for school? I’m not in school anymore. 

9. What movie is in your DVD player? How old is this survey? DVDs are obsolete now, man. 

10. Last two numbers in your phone number? I’m too lazy to check

11. Who’s in your house? I’m not home currently but Glenn is

12. What side of the bed do you sleep on? The left side, although I usually end up in the middle. Much to Glenn’s dismay.

13. Do you like roller coasters? I loved them as a kid but my tolerance for them has all but diminished with age. I’m too anxious now!

14. What magazine(s) do you look at the most? I used to be a magazine FIEND but I hardly read them anymore. For some reason, my office gets Cosmo delivered monthly and I like to skim through it sometimes before tossing it.  15. What kind of car do you drive? I don’t!

16. What do you think about gay marriage? Well I’m not a complete trash person so I support it fully. 

17. What do your pants look like? They’re slip-on jeggings with tummy control. 

18. Do you own an iPod? I haven’t in ages. I don’t even know what I did with the one I used to own

19. What kind of cologne/perfume do you wear? I’m not much of a perfume-y person but like scented lotions and LIGHT body sprays. My favorite scents are Bath & Body Works Lavender Cedarwood or Honolulu Sun. I’ve also been wearing this pink apple scent from Victoria’s Secret lately that smells pretty good! 

20. What are your plans for Saturday? It is Saturday! I’m at work till about 12 and then I want to get some cleaning and chores done at home. And then Glenn & I are gonna take a trip to Barnes & Noble like old times, although seating areas still aren’t available yet so it’ll be a bit of a sad time.

21. What is the dumbest thing you have ever done with your cellphone? Dropped it in the toilet. I’ve dropped it numerous other places too but the toilet was probably the worst of it. 

22. Does mind over matter work for you? I’m working on CBT techniques! I can certainly see how they’re effective. 

23. Are you paranoid? Extremely. 

24. What was the last thing you were invited to? I have a wedding invitation coming in the mail any day now. Very excited about that!

25. What item should never be shared? A FUCKING TOOTHBRUSH. I just recently learned that some of my friends share toothbrushes with their spouses and I want to vomit just thinking about it. 

26. Have you ever sat all the way through Gone With the Wind? I’ve never tried to. Though it’s been making headlines lately for its racial themes so maybe it’s a movie I oughtta watch. 

27. When was the last time you were up all night? Last week 

28. Does drinking alcohol make you act more like your true self? I get more daydreamy and more lost in my head. Which I guess is my truest self so... yeah.

29. Where is your favorite place? My bed

30. Do you ever think about marriage? I sure do! Glenn & I have very serious plans for it. That will likely be happening sooner than I think... 

31. Do you sleep with a fan on? Every night. And lately we’ve been doubling up with an oscillating fan and the ceiling fan 

32. What is the best thing about winter? I love the magic of the first snowfall, I love the holiday season, I love the cozy food. There’s lots to love! 

33. Have you ever been truly in love? I currently am. And what a feeling it is!

34. How many states have you been to where all you saw was the airport? 2-3?

35. Are you currently planning a trip? My godmother just booked our cottage for August and I’m PRAYING my work schedule will allow me to go. 

36. How many plants are in your home? Several fake ones and then one succulent and one aloe plant that is on its last legs. I’ve never had a green thumb!

37. Have you ever googled a name and found somebody? Yeah?

38. What is your favorite possession? My baby blanket, my childhood teddy bear, my Claddagh ring, my promise ring. 

39. What makes you feel like you are young again? Piggybacking off my previous answer, I’ll say my baby blanket and my teddy bear. His name’s Lemonade, btw! 

40. Do you ever type “kik” instead of “lol”? Ya know it doesn’t happen so much anymore 41. Do you know how to play chess? Not even slightly and I have no desire to learn

42. What are you worrying about right now? Ehh, let’s not go there. 

43. Are you picky? With food? Not at all. With people? Yes. 

44. You have one wish, what would it be? A life free from anxiety & insecurity  45. Where were you at 11:45 PM today? It hasn’t happened yet! 

46. Ever talked to someone that was high? Mhm

47. How tall is the person you like? Shorter or taller? He’s roughly my height. Some days he’s a teeny bit taller though.

48. Sent last message to? My college friends groupchat 

49. Last person you left comment for? I think it was on the business page for my sister’s workplace

50. Do you have a Facebook? Yep yep

52. Last person you were in the car with besides your family? Glenn 

53. Do you own a polo? I used to own several when I worked at Starbucks, but I burned them in a bonfire on my last day. Freedom!

54. Are you currently frustrated with a boy? Nah, I’ve got a good one

55. Are you excited for winter? I like winter but I want to enjoy my summer & fall first!

56. If it was free and it would work perfectly, would you get plastic surgery? I sure would. I got a list of procedures I’d get...

57. Have you ever slapped someone in the face? Yep... 

58. Have you ever been called prince or princess? Yes :) Glenn calls me princess frequently. 

59. Do you go to a gym? No but maybe I should start. Not even for the physical benefits but mostly the mental ones.

60. Do you like your body? I’ve dropped a lot of weight in the past few months so I certainly feel more comfortable lately. But I’m still only halfway to my goal. 

61. What do you hear right now? Just the sound of my own typing 

62. Who was the last person to tell you “I love you”? Glenn this morning

63. If you had to change your eye color, would you? What would it be? I actually like my eye color. I might opt for a more vibrant green shade if I could choose but mostly I like them as is. 

64. Last thing you wrote your name on? A sheet of paper a few minutes ago 

65. What do you want for Christmas? That’s too far away to even consider!

66. Does it snow where you live? It’s pretty much what we’re known for here

67. Where did you get the pants you’re wearing right now? Kohl’s 

68. When is the next time you will see your grandma? I honestly don’t know. Her and my grandpa live in assisted living and all those facilities have been locked down due to Covid. And they show no signs of reopening soon

69. Do you wear makeup every day? I’m too lazy for that 

70. What is it tomorrow? Sunday Funday (actually Sunday laundry & grocery shop day. Still....fun?)