#the next mutation

[theblorboscalledtheturtles]

joining the fandom 30 years late

[snackugaki]

part 1 

did I have to cut it there? yes. why? because I’m p-e-t-t-y, I’m petty all the time  ♪ ♫ 

but also, the image cap boo

the tags cannot contain my full power some of my really good tags got eaten by the tag limit and they’re grudges I keep in a little pile in my heart

did this silly little fan comic get away from me? ...YES

was I gonna originally stop it there? also yes but you know... I love being snide and petty but after catching covid like a week ago I’m not gonna bring any bad juju with me into next year if I can help it

I forgot how fucking neon the coloring got for awhile in the archie comics

im cryin g this was supposed to be a short’n sentimental’n sweet comic and now look at me, i played myself

look, Venus has waited a quarter of a century, she earned this

i think... what tickles me most about Venus after coming back to TMNT fandom via Rise, is that from what I can see (on tumblr), the kids love her. they love her and make versions of her in the series that came after the 90s. i look at their bios, some weren’t even born when Next Mutation was airing. (and as far as I can tell, Next Mutation didn’t really get much syndicated airtime if any) ...and they still love her. hurt me in my old little heartguts. it’s mostly my generation of tmnt fans who express distaste for her... but the new fans, they love her, they include her in their aus, they make a place for her in their childhood series. hoo h oo giv give me a moment..

if I could pop back into 1998 and tell little 13 year old snackugaki that Venus would be back, I would. all I had were Trini Kwan and Venus de Milo (not ONLY them, just for the purpose of this post) as a fighty, angry little girl. 

all my childhood idols who could fight were calm, level-headed characters who could just happen to throw a villain through a wall if they really needed to. if it wasn’t for them who knows where baby snacku fite meh! gaki would be today. going up against Rhonda Rousey for the championship belt idk, who can accurately estimate the magnitude of childhood influences, not this bitch

if you’re also in PST and wondering why I typed up this post at goddamn 3am then we’re both insomniacs, you didn’t see me, stop snitching

EDIT: I KNEW IT, SOME OF THE TAGS GOT EATEN! HATEFUL! HATEFUL TUMBLR LIMITATIONS! ahhhhh it’s whatevs

[tmntismdoodls]

yippee and yahoo

used a reference used by @adorkastock for the pose :3

[mcmadcanvas]

i know a lot of current fans came into tmnt through rise, but i wanna know, which was your tmnt baby?

[lotus-duckies]

i like that raph's gender is motorcycle girlie

[whattraintracks]

1. Watching His Favorite Movie - every iteration I've ever seen

My headcanons based on vibes and thrown together in the middle of the night

1987 Raphael

becomes the most annoying person you’ve ever watched a movie with 

ever 

has seen this movie ten dozen times, can and will quote it by heart 

would rather make fun of everything in said movie, witty one-liners galore 

all the snacks which he chews obnoxiously and loudly 

1990s Raph 

as background noise to literally anything 

once he saw it and decided yep this is my favorite he never sat down to watch it again 

he's got things to do and ain’t nobody got time to sit down and watch a movie they’ve already seen 

just has it playing while he works out or cleans his sai or does chores or whatever 

but if someone tries to turn it off he will get pissed, he was paying attention thank you very much and that was the best part 

TNM Raph 

on his own, he either gets super into it or just passes out halfway through 

with some else, he must make them understand why this is in fact the greatest movie of all time 

the kinda guy that goes wait wait wait here’s the best part and gets mad when you don’t react correctly to his favorite scenes 

the guys hate him for it because they’ve all seen this movie a million times 

but Venus has not! and he takes full advantage of that fact 

2003 Raph 

is pretty thoughtful and quiet about it 

mostly because he likes to pull it out when he’s having a low-energy day or just feeling nostalgic 

must be doing something mindless simultaneously: knitting, eating, I don’t know, laundry?

is also super insightful about it, can and will dissect the plot 

hums the soundtrack to himself for the rest of the day 

2007 Raph 

prefers to watch with at least one other person so he can ✨ discuss ✨

always uses closed captions

loves the IDEA of sneaking into theaters to see it but can’t stand watching it straight through 

frequently pauses and rewinds, especially loves extended cuts and commentaries 

will get sidetracked halfway through by video essays and online debates courtesy of Donnie

2012 Raph 

his level of enjoyment is directly proportional to the amount of scoffing 

even alone actually, it's not just a tough guy act 

it's like when you know something is objectively awful but you unironically love it anyway 

if someone misreads this as dislike or disinterest and suggests turning it off they will be threatened within an inch of their life 

hates interruptions cannot stand people who talk while watching his movie and gets really frustrated when he can’t finish watching it in one sitting 

Rise Raph 

DO NOT GET NEAR HIM 

the closest available object and/or person will become his personal teddy bear for the duration of any scene that makes him emotional 

otherwise he’s reenacting the entire thing, as a one-man show or with his siblings 

definitely knows it by heart and all of the trivia 

particularly all the obscure actors and stunt people 

M&M Raph 

so loud, oh my wow, both him and whatever device he’s watching on 

reacts every time like it’s the first time he’s seen it 

especially loses his mind if he notices something he never has before 

talks about it for hours afterwards 

will subconsciously adopt all the catchphrases and verbal quirks 

[bulbabutt]

I’m the wrong person to ask to be objective about next mutation because every night when I can see the planet Venus in the sky I blow it a kiss because I am think abt her

[jebbabunga]

She holds a special place in my heart😿

+ the next mutation venuses in background

[snackugaki-jestsjapesjokes]

i am consumed with the urge to collect them all, preferably across all iterations but my ass don't know 03 or 12 like that and my memory of 87 is too rusty, h elp

[hotheadedhero]

Does anyone here remember that weird tv series called The Next Mutation? I remember owning a set of four episodes on vhs when I was a kid

The memory of it came to me in a fever-induced dream

And I'd like to go back to forgetting about its existence

Even they look mad about their place in this world

[theblorboscalledtheturtles]

you've been visited by the money Leo. You don't get any money if you reblog tho but just look at this guy

[lycanthropthy]

would anyone be interested in my nine page google document that compiles all existing TMNT media chronologically into a checklist for your completionist convinience and pleasure

edit: here (x)

[ilovebeinaturtle]

Hello fellow Mikey fans and followers or any TMNT fan show see this

[whattraintracks]

16. Dance Competition - The Next Mutation

In this essay, I will perform a totally impartial review of select TNM episodes to prove Raph could win a dance competition.

Dancing - "Turtles' Night Out"

Remember when Mikey threw a costume party rave to raise money for endangered animals? No? Probably for the best. All you need to know is that Mikey hosts an all-night rave and makes the other turtles help him with it. They even dance, so let's judge them for it. I mean, on it.

Mikey is a simple but good dancer. Follows the beat well enough and goes with the flow. Mostly simple arm moves, some recognisable stuff, all well executed. I gather he has the most dance experience of the five. And! He does all this while DJing. Could be interesting to watch him show off.

Venus does not dance. Does carry Mace. Good for her.

Leo's moves mostly consist of shadowboxing, kicking, and whatnot. Tries to dance like a normal person and just looks awkward. Bless his heart, he does not know what to do with his limbs. One gal does compliment his moves, though, and they dance together.

Donnie, at first, seems to know what he's doing but also ends up pseudo-fighting or maybe doing aerobics. And he just keeps kicking. There are casualties. Despite this, the ladies are very impressed by him, and he and Leo perform a fun move together, finishing with a classic high foot.

Last but not least, Raph, The Bouncer (his words, he’s so silly I love him). He bops, sways, and hums along to the music, triple threat. Does very little actual dancing, but since this is March for Raph, we should let him win anyway.

Kidding. We obviously don't have enough data to determine he's the winner, so let's score them all out of four here and do the same for their skateboarding and sparring skills.

Scores: Mikey 4/4, Donnie 3/4, Leo 2/4, Raph 1/4, Venus 0/4

Skateboarding - "Unchain My Heart, Part 1"

This is an activity that contains skills related to dancing, right? Yes? Maybe? Alright. Leo and Raph stand out to me as the better skateboarders. Raph trumps Leo because his tricks are cooler, and his lines are funnier. Mikey does well, but not as many tricks as Leo and Raph, who also get more airtime. Venus likely has much less experience than the guys but holds her own. Donnie is dead last since he only stands on his remote-controlled skateboard. Skilled engineer? Yes. Skilled skateboarder? Apparently not.

Scores: Raph 4/4, Leo 3/4, Mikey 2/4, Venus 1/4, Donnie 0/4

Sparring - "Sewer Crash," "Like Brothers," and "Truth or Consequences"

Let's narrow this down to one-on-one spars with Raph, just because.

Raph and Donnie: The particular spar I'm thinking about might be unfair to Donnie, who is being hypnotised at night and not sleeping, but it’s less sparring and more showing off anyway. Raph looks very cool in this scene. Point to Raph.

Raph and Mikey: Raph pretty casually blocks Mikey's attacks and quickly gets him in a hold. Point to Raph.

Raph and Leo: So evenly matched they can fight all day without a definitive winner. Leo is victorious in one episode because he is sufficiently pissed off and spiteful. Raph, in other episodes, overwhelms him with pure strength. Solid tie.

Raph and Venus: She can and does kick his butt, but he's quick to return the favor. He has better technique and more experience that she makes up for with unorthodox methods and magic. Tie.

Scores: Raph 4/4, Leo 4/4, Venus 4/4, Donnie 2/4, Mikey 2/4

Outcomes

After formally and scientifically analysing random scenes with absolutely no bias toward a certain turtle, I've determined the following outcomes for a dance competition. In third place, with 5 points each, we have the ever-lovable Donnie and Venus. Mikey takes second with 8 points, probably lower than he could be because he's too busy daydreaming about what abominations he could be whipping up in the kitchen. And with 9 points, Raph would win . . . and tie with Leo. Tough tortillas, bud. Even in a hypothetical competition rigged in your favor, you're still stuck with him.

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Bonus: silly photos of them on a rank podium.

[jack-enbyfold]

All the 5th turtles are good!

Slash is COMPLEX

Jennika is BEAUTIFUL

Tokka

Venus is TRYING HER BEST

[galacticghostly]

I love The Next Mutation actually