#the obligation to create stuff for school/job

[electraslight]

how do you create such a large quantity of art? it’s honestly incredible—

first off- do not attempt to replicate my output of art. it would be very bad for you to push yourself to create the amount of art i do with the level of effort i put into it, and i dont want anyone to see my work and think 'hmmm this level of output is sustainable and healthy'

i am disabled and stuck at home all day every day, that's why i make so much. i can only make this much because i can't do anything else, and i am constantly frusturated with the process. I love to draw and make art but if you are a normal person with a job or school or a social life you will not be able to love it because it will ruin your life. there's never an obligation to 'put out' a lot of art, and its not something you should value. make things and put your time into them out of passion, not just to fill up a portfolio. enjoy my stuff but know i am an exception to the rule. take care of yourself

[ambrossart]

just reread your Dancing With Myself series again and really wanna hear you talk more about Eddie and the reader soooo…..

do you have any headcannons for Eddie or his and the reader’s relationship? or any other characters relationships with the reader like Chrissy, Jason, or any one in Hellfire, Dustin included? maybe even Steve since you have that side story coming one day. I have some but I’d love to hear yours!

Sorry this took me so long to finish. It was hard to decide what to use and what to save for future fics. Plus I just never know what to write for these. 😅

So I’m gonna use this post to share random stuff that probably won’t ever get incorporated into the actual series (and if it does, it’s no big deal if it gets spoiled now).

So, without further ado…

Welcome to the Dancing with Myself Trivia Dump!

(This is going to be pretty long, so get comfortable.)

Reader & Eddie (feat. Wayne)

They’re virtually inseparable over the summer, like to the point where it’s kind of obnoxious. (Gareth is the only one who ever complains, though… and to be fair, Gareth complains about everything.)

Basically, whenever the reader isn’t with Chrissy, she’s with Eddie. They’re seriously committed to spending as much time together as possible before the reader goes to college.

They spend a fair amount of time hanging out in Eddie’s room. Eddie might be playing guitar or working on a campaign, while the reader’s usually lying on his bed with a book or a comic or something. Doing their own thing, together.

She practically lives at the Munson trailer. Wayne literally has to force her to go home every once in a while:

“Hey, when was the last time you checked in with your folks?” “Hmm, what day is it?” “Wednesday.” “No, I mean what day of the month is it?” “… Go home.”

Wayne acts like her constant presence annoys him, but honestly, he loves having her around. He used to feel so guilty for leaving Eddie home alone all the time. It’s nice that he finally has someone to keep him company. It gives Wayne a sense of closure.

They still eat breakfast together several times a week. She has her own coffee mug and everything, which Wayne picked out specially for her.

Anyway, she and Eddie still hang out at the Hideout regularly. It’s their home away from home.

When she’s not watching Corroded Coffin perform, she’s usually annoying Cliff at the bar.

Eventually, she expresses an interest in bartending. Cliff (after receiving some encouragement from his partner, Cleo) reluctantly agrees to teach her the basics and later offers her a part-time job.

She bartends there every summer and during holiday breaks from school.

On the nights she bartends, Eddie’s allowed to add two more songs to his setlist. The reader often manages to haggle him an extra song or two.

Of course, the catch is… she gets to pick the songs. And you know she’s always going to choose Journey.

Yeah, Eddie has the entire Journey discography memorized before the end of the summer. It’s torture, but he does it for her.

In case it wasn’t already obvious, Eddie and the reader are not breaking up once the reader goes to college.

The distance creates some problems for them, sure, but they always work through them.

This is supposed to be a comfort series, after all. Nothing bad happens here.

I don’t know if these two will go the route of marriage and kids. I won’t completely rule it out, but I don’t think it’s something either of them is dying to do, if that makes sense. Like their lives won’t feel empty if they don’t have kids.

I could, however, totally see them buying The Hideout if Cliff ever decides to sell it. 👀

★ Bonus Trivia ★

Eddie genuinely had no romantic intentions when he went into the girls’ restroom at prom. It was more of a moral obligation than anything. Eddie was just gonna pop in for a bit, make sure she’s okay, clear his conscience, and then bail.

But the longer he stayed, the more he talked to her… yeah, he was hooked after that.

I think Eddie also saw it as an opportunity to get some closure. He saw it as his last chance to talk to her, to really talk to her, before they both graduate and never see each other again.

Needless to say, it went a lot better than he expected.

Hellfire

Out of respect for the other party members, the reader does not participate in the majority of their sessions.

It’s not that she doesn’t want to. She just knows her presence will distract Eddie from the game, and that wouldn’t be fair—to Eddie or to anyone else. She understands what this game means to everyone. She doesn’t want to ruin it.

She does sit in on special occasions, though, and when she does, she and Eddie kinda get sucked into their own little world. It’s similar to when they were kids, but now there’s all this weird sexual tension that makes everyone else feel a little uncomfortable.

But hey, the reader can’t really help it. Eddie’s geeky side is way too attractive to her. 🤷🏻‍♀️

She gets along with the party well enough. Gareth still isn’t her biggest fan, but he can’t deny that she makes Eddie happy, so… he tolerates her as much as he can.

They still bicker constantly, though.

Dustin is kind of like a permanent third wheel. He tends to interrupt a lot of Eddie and the reader’s more intimate moments. They all do it, honestly, but Dustin is by far the worst offender.

Romantic night in? Well, guess who decides to drop by for a surprise visit?

Usually, Eddie brushes it off, but sometimes, especially if he’s really… worked up, Eddie loses his patience a little.

He has to unplug his phone a lot, and it doesn’t take long for his friends to figure out what that means.

Dustin is the last one to catch on. Gareth clues him in.

When Scottie finally gets released from prison, he joins the party as well. He’s shocked and thrilled by how much Hellfire has grown since he and Eddie founded it.

At first, there’s a bit of a power struggle over who’s the DM. Ultimately, they decided to take turns.

They, of course, eventually replay Scottie’s infamous campaign. Having the extra members makes it twice as much fun and chaotic as the first run.

Naturally, Eddie and the reader find this very nostalgic and spend most of their time shamelessly flirting with each other.

And the reader is very tempted to betray Eddie and sacrifice him a second time, just for the hell of it. As the moment gets closer and closer, she seriously debates it for a good five minutes.

Would that be mean?

He probably wouldn’t get that mad, right?

Anyway… the reader, Jeff, and Grant end up going to the same college. This didn’t happen on purpose. It was just a fun little coincidence.

Their school does have a D&D club, with a very charismatic DM, who just happens to be the frontman of a moderately successful rock band (not metal, though, think more like folk rock). He’s like Eddie Munson 2.0.

I could definitely see Eddie getting a little jealous over this, especially if the reader ever expresses any kind of (completely platonic) admiration toward him and his abilities as a DM or musician.

He’s not a jealous or possessive person, but things like that do make him feel a little insecure.

Wait, there might actually be a story here. I’m gonna write this one down.

Corroded Coffin

Scottie rejoins the band once he’s out of prison, so they finally get their lead singer back.

Technically, Scottie’s vocal talents have not improved in the slightest, but he has a certain tone that just… works. Plus he’s got good looks and incredible stage presence, so it all balances out in the end.

Eventually, Gareth, Jeff, and Grant leave the band to pursue their own academic and professional interests. The band was more of a fun hobby for them, not something they wanted to make a career out of.

Eddie and Scottie stay on, recruit some new members, and start taking the band a lot more seriously.

Their efforts pay off in the end. While they never become worldwide famous, they do carve out a decent fanbase for themselves.

The reader is very supportive and proud of the band’s success, but it does come with some serious drawbacks.

Eddie’s gone a lot. He has a lot of female fans now, which makes the reader feel very insecure.

Whatever progress she was making with her anxiety... well, that's out the window now.

Honestly, this is probably the closest they'll ever get to breaking up. And maybe they even do break up temporarily, for like a month or two.

It’s not that she doesn’t trust Eddie. The situation just makes her very uncomfortable and she has a lot of self-sabotaging, intrusive thoughts—thoughts that she unintentionally projects on Eddie.

And Scottie is definitely the kind of person who would encourage groupies and stuff like that. He never got a lot of attention from girls in high school, so you know he’s gonna be taking advantage of that now.

Eddie’s 100% about the music. Scottie's more about the fame.

Okay, I’m gonna end this section now because it’s bringing up too many new ideas.

Chrissy and Jason

The reader’s family treats Chrissy like their second daughter. They absolutely adore her.

Who wouldn’t? Chrissy’s an angel. I mean, look at this little cutie pie.

Chrissy, for her part, feels more at home with the reader’s family than she does with her own family. The difference is like night and day. She can completely be herself around them.

I know so far, Chrissy’s been playing the more supportive role in the friendship, but it’s really 50–50 with them. They alternate between moments of weakness and strength.

For example, there was a time when Chrissy was in a really dark headspace and seriously struggling with her ED. I’m not going to go into detail about it because I don’t want to risk triggering anyone, but it got really scary at times. Thankfully, Chrissy’s come a long way since then, and the reader played a huge part in that.

The reader really dotes on Chrissy. She showers her with a lot of compliments and affection. Gives her a lot of random, cutesy nicknames.

They both do this, honestly, but I think Chrissy gets a little more flustered by it, especially in public.

(I know a lot of people headcanon Chrissy as a closeted bisexual woman, and I'm fully on board with that. Just saying.)

This was touched on in the main story, but Chrissy very much feels like an imposter. She doesn’t understand why she’s so popular, or why people even like her. In her opinion, the reader should be the popular one. She’s the funnier one, the smarter one, the prettier one… so why was Chrissy chosen over her? What’s so special about her? She’s always felt this way, even as a little kid.

As a lot of people already suspected, Chrissy does know about the reader’s childhood crush on Jason, and she felt really guilty about dating Jason after that. Felt like she kind of stole him from her.

That’s part of the reason why it took them so long to start dating even though they’d been aware of each other’s feelings for a while. Chrissy was very hesitant to pursue a relationship with Jason at the risk of hurting her best friend’s feelings.

(Just for the record, Jason was also fully aware of the reader’s feelings and was equally conflicted about dating Chrissy.)

There are times, even as recently as prom, when Chrissy thinks Jason would be happier if he was dating the reader instead of her. She sees their playful (almost flirty) banter and realizes that Jason doesn’t act that way with anyone else, not even with her. That’s their special thing. And it makes her feel a little insecure.

Honestly, that whole dynamic is a little unconventional. In fact, I wouldn’t be surprised if some students suspect there’s some kind of throuple situation going on.

Let me put it this way: nobody batted an eye when the three of them showed up at prom together.

The boundaries between them get so blurry, especially for Jason.

I’m not saying there’s anything inappropriate going on. Absolutely not.

Obviously, Jason loves Chrissy and would never in a million years even think about cheating on her (least of all with her best friend). It’s just… he’s known the reader so long and spends so much time with her, sometimes it feels like he’s dating her too—at least on an emotional level—and he has to catch himself and remind himself that she’s not his girlfriend.

Maybe that's why he seems a little extra hostile toward Eddie.

Like I said, it’s a little weird.

Speaking of Jason, Chrissy and Jason do break up at some point after graduation.

Nothing dramatic. The two just want different things in life.

Jason wants that white picket fence. Marriage. Kids. Everything. And I think Chrissy would rather focus on herself for a while and then put most of her energy into helping others, especially teenage girls like herself.

She and the reader never fall out of touch, though.

They talk on the phone almost every day. See each other whenever they can. They're never too busy for each other.

Misc.

Nancy Wheeler

Well, since the reader lives on the same street as the Wheelers, it's entirely possible that the reader and Nancy occasionally played together as kids. I wouldn't say they're particularly close, though.

Honestly, she's probably closer to Barb than she is to Nancy. I feel like they would relate to each other.

Robin Buckley

Robin and the reader used to be band buddies back in the day.

That’s right, the reader used to be in band. I’ll leave her instrument up to you.

Now, I wouldn’t say she and Robin were Chrissy-level close, but they were nearly that close. They hung out before and after every rehearsal. They sat next to each other on the bus. Roomed together during band trips. You get the idea.

Robin was very upset when the reader quit unexpectedly. She thought she had done something wrong.

(Now, it's my personal headcanon that Robin developed a teeny tiny crush on the reader, and she thought maybe she had inadvertently overstepped and made the reader feel uncomfortable— and that's why the reader quit band. But you don't have to subscribe to my nonsense.)

In reality, the reader quit band because she didn't want to participate in the individual recital at the end of the year. Every student was required to perform a solo in front of the class, and the reader noped right out.

Now things are awkward between her and Robin.

Steve Harrington

While Steve was a student at Hawkins High, he and the reader didn't interact much at all. Maybe they saw each other in the hallway, but that's about it.

That changed after Steve started working at Family Video.

Now they interact on a weekly basis. She's one of Steve's regular customers. Every Saturday, like clockwork, she shows up looking for a new horror movie to watch over the weekend.

Over time, he came to understand her movie preferences very, very well.

That, as you'll see in the upcoming short story, makes Eddie feel a little jealous and suspicious.

Is there something else going on there?

—

Okay, I think I've rambled on long enough.

Hopefully, you got some entertainment out of this because I certainly did. And I came up with some new story ideas too, so... win-win.

Thank you for reading! ❤️

[not-your-bro]

do you have any ud hcs? It could be anything idc

ooh, free rein! sure sure. josh + chris are def the characters i most frequently rotate in my mind, so some stuff about them off the top of my head...

josh

film studies major. i must admit i don't adhere to the psych major he's given in canon, though director/producer roles aren't my first choice for him either. he goes all-in on tangible stuff for his prank, so i put him in the practical effects arena.

artist in his spare time, but big surprise he's cagey about it. like, chris sees josh's sketchbook in josh's room all the time, but he's never actually looked inside.

with both movie sfx + art, josh is practical > digital, and he only dips into digital effects or art when he absolutely needs to. i just think he's a tactile sort of guy who prefers to make things with his hands, so creating on a screen alone doesn't give him the same satisfaction.

on social media in that he has accounts, but they're sporadically active at best. he can be slow to respond to texts/dms and his responses can be short, which gives off the impression that he's disengaged or bored. he isn't, he just doesn't want to be on his phone.

this is a longstanding hc of mine that i've absolutely mentioned before, but: designed hannah's butterfly tattoo! didn't really understand why, he was like you know your tattoo artist can do one for you, right. but she insisted, and he obliged.

gay as fuck. realized young, came out young, very comfortable. as demonstrated by the fact that, much to everyone's annoyance, he wears shirts that say shit like 'employee of the month at the dick sucking factory' in public.

chris

ok, so i've reached the point where the chris in my mind looks different enough that i get a little jumpscared when i see him in-game LMAO. i hc him both taller and heavier. he's gotta be at least 6 ft. and a chris hartley who's thin is no chris hartley at all. not to me.

does not come from money, like lower middle class. i have two totally different hcs about his family that both feel real to me: one is that he's an only child, his parents divorced when he was a kid (old enough to understand, but not quite a teenager), and he lives with his mom. the other is that his parents are not divorced, and he has a big family - lots of siblings. i've been going with the former in my fic lately, but both work for me. the constant is that his family's economic situation is more precarious than most people in the friend group, and family trips with (and funded by) the washingtons were his primary vacations.

has adhd. i find 'always on his phone bc he just loooves technology' less interesting than 'always on his phone bc he has existing attention problems.' this went undiagnosed for a while, and his performance in school suffered for it.

speaking of, he is not all-around school smart. like, emily may have strengths and weaknesses (even if she'd never admit them), but she can swing As across the board. chris cannot. he's getting good grades in classes that interest him or cater to his solution-oriented brain, but he's terrible in any class where there's no right answer. english, art - he does not get it. love him to death but his media literacy is Bad

bi as fuck, but it was a journey. thought he was straight for a long time, dismissing any attraction to men as a 'who hasn't had gay thoughts' kind of thing. i think it took him a while to come to terms with it bc he had a lot of internalized shit to work through. if a friend came out as bi, he'd have been like cool 👍 but him? surely not! he got there eventually though.

wowee this is long. as a lil bonus hc for another character, i'll add that i don't think jess went to college - i think she went to a hair/beauty school. she loves what a social job it is, getting to chit chat with clients all day, and like josh, she does best when she's working with her hands.

[n3mesi5]

not so Study Sunday (26-1-25)

So a little bit of n3mesi5 related activity report.

A little refresher: Study Sundays is more of my obligation to myself and to my passion to create stories by documenting the stuff that I have learned so others and myself can learn from what I make.

if I didn't make a study sunday or make a post explaining why, I'm probably dealing with something serious in my life.

But anyways, Study Sundays is POSTPONED for today. Even though I find them to be not educational as I expect them to be, writing them still takes a lot of time and energy. I really want to make something that people will find entertaining to read or not really boring as a school textbook, which I'm yet to perfect.

1. Organizing and resting (again)

As of now, I spent my day to organize my materials and take a good rest from my little internet ventures, since I want to have a healthy relationship with my little internet career.

2. I joined a indie studio

Good news, I joined an indie studio. Bad news, I'm not getting paid. But that doesn't mean this opportunity is bad for me. I've been working as an advisor for the team, maintaining a sort of a distant relationship since I don't know if they're taking it seriously or it's gonna be a childish gimmick that burns out quick. This sunday, our second meeting began and I finally see the commitment I'm looking for. The lead dev is watching his crew very closely and even doing a good "team checkup" by asking questions for each member personally and privately to discover problems, ideas and even ways to improve his studio. I made it sound basic but he's going above and beyond and my words cannot express it. But still, He is doing an amazing job, beyond my expectations. So I decided to commit as well, so I'll be drawing AND writing for them.

3. Mandatory Art dump

Sometimes I'm not comfortable sharing some of my works even though they look amazing, so they'd be part of Study Sundays to show some of my less proud work to people that will appreciate them more than I have.

4. Preparing essentials

I finally finished setting up my paypal and making a Ko-Fi account. Someday I'll be confident to do commissions but I need to see if I can draw a variety of characters and have a consistent technique.

5. Thank you for reading

Study sundays are really special to me and youre watching my little story grow and I'm happy that you are part of it. For me to know that you read this, please comment your favorite drink. Mine's grape juice!

[beardedmrbean]

Former Spokane NAACP President Nkechi Diallo — better known as Rachel Dolezal, a white woman who identified as Black — has been fired from a teaching gig in Arizona.

Dolezal, 46, was employed as an after-school instructor with the Catalina Foothills School District in Tucson, but lost her job at Sunrise Drive Elementary after local news station KVOA revealed she had posted explicit content to an OnlyFans page.

"We only learned of Ms. Nkechi Diallo's Only Fans social media posts yesterday afternoon. Her posts are contrary to our district's ‘Use of Social Media by District Employees’ policy (attached) and our staff ethics policy. She is no longer employed by the Catalina Foothills School District," Julie Farbarik, the district's director of alumni & community relations, told KVOA on Wednesday.

Dolezal made national headlines in 2015 after her claims of being an African-American were debunked by her own parents, who said she had Czech, German and Swedish ancestry. She resigned as head of her local NAACP chapter in Spokane, Wash., amid the controversy and was dismissed from her position as an instructor for Africana studies at Eastern Washington University.

‘TRANSRACIAL’ RACHEL DOLEZAL WHINES THAT SHE CAN'T GET A JOB

She was also ousted from Spokane's volunteer police ombudsman commission amid allegations that she acted improperly and violated government rules, the Guardian reported.

In 2019, Dolezal reached a settlement with the state of Washington, which had accused her of welfare fraud. She was required to pay restitution and complete 120 hours of community service.

Dolezal was still claiming to be Black as recently as 2021 when she told the "Tamron Hall" show in an interview that she had been unable to secure a job. She said she's "always identified racially as human" but she's found "more of a home in Black culture and the Black community." 

"I’m still the same person I was in May of 2015, I’m still doing the work, I’m still pressing forward, but it has been really tough for sure," she said at the time.

She launched her OnlyFans page later that year, offering content including "Monday Motivation = Gym/Fitness/Squats N Other Stuff" followed by "Wednesday WorkDay = Hair-chair Conversations with my clients + HairTutorials" and "Friday Unwind: I bring the Art, you bring the wine/drinks. Watch me create & discuss my art," the New York Post reported.

But in the years since, Dolezal has posted explicit content on her OnlyFans page, which KVOA reported was shared on public websites. 

NKECHI DIALLO, AKA RACHEL DOLEZAL, REACHES SETTLEMENT IN WELFARE FRAUD CASE

Sunrise Drive Elementary Principal Julie Farbarik emailed parents Wednesday confirming that Dolezal is no longer employed by the school, KVOA reported.

"Yesterday afternoon, we received information that a Sunrise Drive employee had an Only Fans account, which had content that was contrary to our district's staff social media use and ethics policies. That person is no longer employed by the Catalina Foothills School District," the email stated.

"We are committed to maintaining a learning environment where our presence on social media is consistent with our professional obligations."

The Catalina Foothills School District did not immediately respond to a request for comment.

[2nerd4this]

Rating jobs I've done at an Elementary School in the last 2 years but it progressively gets more unhinged

1-on-1 aid to a Kindergartner: 6/10 I worked with two different students last year and they were both really amazing, but I was severely underpaid and overworked (learned later I was legally obligated to a 15 minute break every day... that did not happen).

Classroom aid in 3rd Grade: 10/10 I loved, loved, loved the teacher I worked with, and it was such a welcome break in my day.

Social Work Intern: 9/10 What I'm doing currently. My supervisors are all really amazing and I'm learning a lot but it can be anxiety inducing

Substitute 1-on-1 aid: -1000/10 Imagine you show up one day to an Elementary school and they tell you that you are responsible for a high-needs kid, but don't tell you his name, schedule, teachers name, accommodations... and he's non-communicative. That only happened once but other similar experiences were also not enjoyable

Substitute Classroom Aid: 8/10 Honestly I do very little in this position, beyond keeping an eye on a few kids and working with small groups on projects and stuff. Lots of fun and not stressful, but honestly a bit boring

Susbstitute Gen Ed Teacher: 4/10 All over the place in quality of the experience and completely dependent on the room I am in (especially grade level). I am not assertive enough for the older kids, but the younger ones are alright

Substitute Resource Teacher: 9/10 I love working in small groups, and making those kids excited about what we are learning.

Substitute Early Childhood Intervention Teacher: 100/10 There's a maximum Student-Teacher ratio of 2:1 in each room, and the kids all have high needs, so I get to know them really well in a short amount of time. They are the cutest human beings on the planet

Breakfast Supervisor: 8/10 I had to get to work 20 minutes earlier but I got to spend the morning inside instead of on the playground and the cafeteria cooks were all so nice

Recess Monitor: 6/10 Lots of fun usually, but the weather was miserable. I was out there for 90+ minutes every day, sometimes by myself, often with 50+ students

Impromptu IT Assistant: 9/10 The cafeteria workers and Kindergarten teachers quickly learned that I was mildly adept in technology (I knew to turn it off and back on again) so I would be pulled from classrooms to come fix computers randomly throughout the day

Emergency Animal Handler: 15/10 Bird with a broken wing on the playground? Yeah I'll move it so the kids don't kill it. Bunnies created a nest below the slide? Yeah I'll create a barricade so the kids don't bother them. Said baby bunnies got stuck on top of slide? Give me a bucket and I'll move them back to their nest at 8 in the morning

Random Task Person: 9/10 List of things I did when my 1-on-1 was absent/in individual instruction: set up book fair, blew up a bouncy house, hung up posters, tore down decorations, laminated a billion things, made endless copies, played kickball with 3rd graders, and my personal favorite... built a cardboard box castle

[corviids]

Hey, you are kinda my inspiration, so i do wanna ask some things... if you do work, how do you manage your time in social life, creator and work? Like, I can't seem to organize myself to write or draw :(

And my schedule its going to be free around 5pm and 10pm, and i get overwheelmed, my job system sucks in my country

aw thank you anon !!

i’m not sure how great of advice i can give because i totally relate to how you feel. i think what works for best is keeping items on me that allow me to scribble down inspiration when it strikes. for example, while i’m at work, i also keep a small notebook on me to write/draw ideas to go back to when i have a chance. i won’t lie, i don’t really organize myself that much. creating things doesn’t need to be controlled so let yourself do when you feel like it. when it comes to balancing things, don’t put pressure on yourself. my average work/school day is from 7am-3pm on a normal day so i basically make sure i have all my obligations done before i sit down to do other stuff so i don’t get overwhelmed.

in all honesty, i don’t think there’s a secret to it. it’s completely normal to feel overwhelmed at times but somethings i do to help manage that feeling is: making sure all my daily tasks are completed, disconnect for a bit, allow yourself “me days”, give yourself deadlines and try to hold yourself to them but don’t feel bad if you can’t

i’m sorry if this isn’t very helpful i’m not the best at giving advice ;—; but i wish you luck anon and i’m always here if you need it <33

[2005noroithecurse]

i won't delete that fic entirely bc of the ppl who told me how much they enjoy it & hope one day I'll finish it. I just hope u understand it'll take a while after this, im not exaggerating saying that reading that comment was devastating for me. i write bc i have a lot of love for the source material & the overall community. plus there's a lot of beauty in posting ur thoughts & finding ppl who are like !!! and forming friendships with both other writers & readers. but that will come to an end if people don't stop doing things that crush fandom creators, most pressingly the use of AI. first it was artists being disrespected & having their cultivated skills dismissed bc "well if i tell this program what i want I'll get it in under a half hour when a commission costs money & i have to wait". the natural progression was writers next, just like artistic skill literary skill (even fanfic) is cultivated over time. nobody starts out as some savant, everyone works hard on the things they share here. and it's because they work hard that sometimes stuff doesn't get updated as fast as maybe you'd like, plus ppl on here have lives they have jobs they have families they have school they have obligations. idk I guess im just begging ppl to have even a scrap of patience & respect for the ppl creating the stuff u like on here before it all disappears completely

[curiousorigins]

Yeah, I had this whole period of a few years where I was working a near full time retail job, going to college (over full time via credit hours) and commuting around an hour-2 hours each way depending on when in that period and if I happened to get my favorite bus driver. (he shaved a full 20-40 minutes off of my 2 transfers commute.) Pretty much I had time for nothing especially when you factored in that I get motion sick, so I couldn't manage to do homework on the bus (I could at best manage audio language tapes... as that talk to text stuff was bad then and I have audio processing issues) and I wasn't sleeping well. (I've fallen asleep in a moving vehicle twice in my life for longer than 2 minutes. Once after a full 2 weeks of not sleeping for about 5 minutes (according to friend who was driving) and another on the bus during this period. And yes I was awoken because the bus returned to the bus service garage.) and had to actively play rock music (complete with an audio effects CD on shuffle which was the surprising boon to my playlists. I will never create a Mix CD/Playlist without random animal noises and sirens again.) in order to prevent myself from falling asleep in public and leaving my body to the whims of strangers around me.

So funny thing about this period of my life... whether due to the lack of calories. (no required meal plan as part of tuition as I was commuting to school and thus college not obligated to prevent student starvation. However it was a community college and thus real awesome at providing free food opportunities to those willing to follow their nose/rumors of free food with enough free time between classes to indulge.) lack of sleep, financial stress (I mostly save a few minor grants self-funded my schooling... ending with less than $1,500 debt my final semester despite going to college in the U.S. [highly recommend community colleges. However don't do this. I almost died so many times. I got an ulcer that led to 2 weeks of internal bleeding and missed 2 weeks of work and like 10 years+ fearing many foods. Getting a loan in this case would have been smarter. Yes even with how student loans are.] my grades also couldn't keep up and I lost any academic related funding as well. Including eventually the student loans. I pretty much had a major mental health crisis on top of very horrible health crisises... that for a period at up approximately 6 hours of my none-free-time but actual doing homework/studying/relaxing [If I ever had a chance] time. Don't do it.

Anyways I learned to eat one handed. We were raised in a set the table and use utensils with the proper hand etc household... so yeah for me this was a college-age learned skill. I learned to scarf down (already had to a degree. God bless ovrcrowded public schools where) ANYTHING in less than 10 minutes provided I was hungry enough. To eat (sort of neatly) when walking. To chug 44oz of water etc in about 5 minutes. (My job consisted of unloading trucks in lack of climate control in near one of the hottest places on earth for 3 months of the year. Funny thing, also near the coldest for near the same period of time annually. And I was always at risk of passing out from dehydration. I literally hardly peed during this period because I was sweating enough to keep up with the minimal gallon of water/sport's drink etc I was drinking per day.)

I also had started getting into art and social media. (I actually briefly was making minor waves.) and the only time I had to draw consisted of my breaks and meal breaks at work (because again I got motion sick in moving vehicles). I was drawing, inking, and painting in watercolor 25 days a month, completing an average of 25-40 paintings during that month. Work was the main area where I had wiggle room to socialize, so I was often, drawing/painting in the breakroom while stuffing my face with as many calories as possible (I was unloading trucks and at the height of my families' weirdly high metabolism) while talking. So I was penciling/drawing/finalizing an average of 10-15 minutes (while eating), inking in 5-10 minutes and painting in 15-25 minutes/day. (While eating). Oh and because there literally wasn't a schedule where I could possibly eat a meal at home 5-6 days/week; I also developed absolute zero shame to munching whereever I was, no matter what was going on (though little kid me was ahead of the curve because PBS used to broadcast surgeries on Sundays and I was fascinated. And would have my lunch/dinner watching them and only once they were wiggling around intestines while I was eating spaghetti and had a bad brain sensory visual textural experience. Otherwise I was good to go.) [as an aside, this includes that poor person who was 'pregnant' for a few decades, via the rare ectopic pregnancy that doesn't cause a patient to go septic, who's surgery ended up being broadcast on PBS for some reason... I would assume exploitation to pay for the surgery itself. That's called

(Trigger warning for link above: Many examples of very late term incomplete pregnancies that are identifiably human fetuses that are not compatible with life. Stopped living often decades before they might have been born had the embroyos implanted elsewhere. Frozen in gestation. Images within that could be disturbing to those mourning a miscarriage, actively pregnant, suffering infertility issues etc. Please do use your best judgement and do not click the link above if you're not in a place where one could take their time, energy etc to emotionally deal with such a disturbance.)

But yeah I can eat in pretty any condition. Not super cleanly... mostly because I don't care. My Dad hates going out to eat with me and has to remind me that I won't have successful dates (while I'm not interested in dating anyone) because of how I eat. While I say, "Might as well eat like a pig on the first date, not that there will be dates. Because this how I eat. If they can't stomach it. Then I'm saving us both some hassle." And quickly too. I can't manage to hold my breath while swimming/diving or do that weird pushing breath out to prevent water in your nose thing. But I can breath while I'm actively drinking and eating. I can also eat while talking while not telegraphing that I have food in my mouth via sound or sight.

Those are just some of the few unintended skills I ended up developing, perfecting out of genuine necessity and survival. And no, I don't ever want to live like that again. I respect myself too much to out myself through it. Of course when I decided I'd take commissions at conventions while selling my art, these are skills that I started to purposefully develop.

Jobs don’t always limit the skills you learn to the job itself. For instance, when I worked at Red Robin, they’d offer 30 minutes for an unpaid lunch, or 15 if you wanted to get paid the whole time. If you think that’s extremely shitty join the club.

As a result of wanting money I got really good at eating quickly so I could use my break to read or relax. I’ve always been a fast eater but when I worked there I learned how to eat an entire burger and fries in under five minute while keeping up a conversation. This is not advisable for good digestion, eat slow and chew your food.

There’s a balance to not talking with your mouth full and eating extremely quickly and it was a regularly used skill for years. When I worked at a sex shop I bragged about it once to a coworker.

She watched me with a timer going after I told her about it and we got burgers. I chatted with her the whole time. I was done in four minutes forty seconds.

Afterward she looked haunted and commented, “It was like watching a snake unhinge it’s jaw but you never talked with food in your mouth!”

More recently my beloved and I were catching up with a friend over lunch. I had a sandwich while they’d gotten falafel plates. We were having a lovely chat but after I finished a story our friend said, “I don’t want your food to go cold while you talk!”

I was surprised. I’d been deliberately talking more so she could eat. I turned to show her my empty sandwich box. Both she and my beloved were stunned. It was like I’d performed a magic trick and made my sandwich disappear because neither had even noticed me demolishing it like a snake unhinging it’s jaw.

[beaubambabey]

I literally feel like I can't breathe and I don't know what to do anymore. All I know is I feel like I want to die. Like, seriously genuinely die not the everyday suicidal jokey "lol my life sux" shit I do

My life is over its fucking over and I'm never gonna be able to get out of this situation unless I die

My dad lost his job at the start of the year. I agreed to try and find a higher paying job to help out. That didn't pan out. I tried to do two jobs. Hated every second I was at the other jobs. Quit them. Couldn't get the hours I had prior to searching for a new job back. Didn't know what to say to my boss because all that was in my head was my dad telling me how I needed to get a better job. At least I had a fucking job.

Both my parents have been disparaging the part time jobs I've worked while living with them. They complain about everything, from it being "too far away" (it's less than 10 miles away) to how much I get paid (minimum wage but it's increased. And is much higher than the national average even though the cost of living here is astronomical) to what I bring home (food I want to eat and store in the house/smells/attitude). I wouldn't be working these part time jobs if they'd helped me make college work better for me. Or, if my mom's story (casually dropped years ago, no way to get the truth out of her because I don't know if she's ever told the truth about anything) about how she could've put me on medication as a child, I would've actually gotten a college degree by now.

They say they're proud of me but it always feels superficial. My brother has a master's degree and a good job. I never moved out and have credit card debt.

They complain that I never show them my art, but then when I try to open myself up they either brush me off or completely change the subject.

I don't have a place in this house. I am seen but not heard. I'm a child and will always be a child but at least I'm making them money, huh.

When I was a child I wanted to dance. Not Indian dance, like my mom did. Jazz dance. Tap dance. I loved dancing, and it made me happy. My mom hated that she was paying money for something that wasn't helping me lose weight. Hated that she was paying for something that wouldnt make me into a tiny version of her. I quit dance to focus on acting, because at least I wouldn't need to be skinny and act, right? But then I quit acting to focus on school. I barely graduated high school, and most of it was because my dad screamed me through writing essays for school. "We loved you so much and wanted you to do everything" You didn't love me. You don't love me, you love the idea of me and abhor the creature you created and can't face this reality. To this day, I can't bring myself to write anything academic without self-harming.

If I wasnt going to act or dance, I thought fine art could be something. I drew, I honed my craft, I learned, I studied. It used to be something I was passionate about. I fucked up along the way. I can't let myself pretend that I finish things. I delude myself into thinking I can do so much that when reality hits and I'm suddenly locked in mental loops that leave me stuck I've already fucked up and let people down. I lost the passion for art during lockdown. Less because of circumstances, more because I fucked up and fucked over other people. The obligations to those people and righting those wrongs held me back from drawing, because I couldn't allow myself to move forward without finishing out those obligations. And yet, it took me so long to find the wherewithal to get it done that years had gone by. Being diagnosed with ADHD was too little too late. I should've either been given Ritalin as a child or euthanized.

I tried streaming again in the hopes it would motivate me to draw more. Hoping I could design some new stuff to put on my store. It did help, while it lasted. My internet was shit the entire time I tried, so I gave up since the only time I had the energy to stream was the same time my parents were watching shit on streaming services. I only learned a few days ago that we don't even have unlimited streaming bandwidth and everything I've been doing has just cost my family more money.

Maybe I shouldn't have taken a vacation. Maybe I should've just worked through the month. Maybe I never should have even thought about having fun. Maybe I should never have fun or give myself a break. Maybe that would work for them. Maybe they want to wring me out of every cent I make. If I can't afford to eat food that I actually want to eat then I'll eat less and get skinny. If I can't afford to do anything then I'll never leave. If I can't afford to leave then I'll keep making money for them.

I want to jump out of this fucking window that they never bothered putting a screen on. Maybe if they found my body in the dirt on the side of the house rotting in the freezing cold with the neighbor's lemons it would knock some sense into them. Nothing I've ever done or said ever has. To them, I'm just some little retard child they brought into the world and kept as proof that they're capable.

There is no joy or passion in my heart anymore. Everything is a desperate delusion to escape this hell I live in. I'm a burden to myself and others. I will never be free.

[life-in-the-monster-haus]

I was perhaps a little too harsh on Teala’s design. Maybe because I had been waiting to see her for such a long time (since Toralei’s diary!) also for some reason I thought she was yellow (IDK man)

I’m a little unimpressed.

HOWEVER! She’s cute, I like her cool toned make up & I REALLY like her nose! Monster High criminally underuses the Aquiline Nose, if I recall correctly only G1 Twyla & the Create-A-Monster Witch used that type of nose in their doll sculpt… out of like 80+ dolls that’s not a great average for a nose shape that’s pretty common in real people.

I’m so very bored with the constant barrage of upturned button noses.

Her outfit is fine. I realize they are bound by the camps uniform t-shirt but I like her gladiator sandals & her skirt (shorts? skort!?) with the medallions.

Mx. Polygeist is BEAUTIFUL to behold! Their design is 👌🏽 not extremely unique, their colors aren’t that far off from G1 Spectra (another ghost character) but the way they are used is effective!

Monster High continues to knock it out of the park with gorgeous nonbinaries AND they’re a Teacher / Camp Counselor! An Adult! I can’t tell y’all how important it is to see adult nonbinary rep. There’s this narrative in society that the nonbinary identity is just some phase teenagers go through and while Monster High is set in High School so all the characters are teenagers I’m grateful they managed to put an educator in the mix (in the Mx if you will).

Their make up! Nail polish! The eyelashes! The calculator garter! I am shook! Despite my overwhelming hatred of math I might have to draw them.

If I’m going to complain about the designs I dislike I should also sing the praises of the ones I do & Mx. Polygeist is truly stunning. I’m very sad they’re a one shot character at a summer camp because Monster High (the school) needs them, I’m sure it would be a great comfort to Frankie & the other gender non-conforming monsters to have a nonbinary adult on the staff they can trust to talk about stuff the cis teachers may not understand.

…Shade & Gloom though…

These are the most uninspired designs I’ve ever seen, that’s including fan designs because if it was possible for Mattel to sue itself for copyright infringement of its own characters they could & they would win.

But these were made by an industry professional! Who was paid! And I assume SOMEONE from Mattel vetted these designs so they went past multiple people & everyone was like “looks good!👍🏽”

There’s no way this was an accident this HAS to be intentional! Like the creative team was like “Draculaura isn’t in this comic so we HAVE to put pink vampires in it SOMEWHERE because we are contractually obligated to put a pink vampire in every Monster High media”

That is the only explanation I’ll accept for why Shade & Gloom look like this.

Their split dye is even on the same SIDE as Draculaura’s - I can’t. AND Shade has pigtails which is Draculaura’s whole “thing” like she’s a one off comic book character- you’re not bound by the rules of doll production where the dolls MUST have “long brushable hair” she could have had a pixie cut or a bun or a politically incorrect Afro- I’ll accept ANYTHING other than pig tails on this pink vampire character!

Gloom isn’t any better. He doesn’t get a pass because he’s a boy who wears eyeshadow. I understand twins gotta twin but the only thing separating him from his sister is that his earrings are black while hers are white.

If I sound upset it’s because I am. I’m a character designer by trade struggling to find jobs but here’s someone who had a job (my DREAM job) & they absolutely phoned it in. No attempt was made.

We deserve better for Pride.

One of the things I love about Monster High are the incredible character designs.

But for some reason that doesn’t translate to the comics because allegedly these are new characters but all I’m seeing is Streakless Frankie and Skinny G3 Draculaura & Valentine from this years Pride comic.

These 2 from last years Pride Comic are cute though.

[prettycoolducks]

Posting at 1am bc it's a silly little comic I made by the light of my phone but I think it would be funny if Charles and Noir were forced to interact with a tween

[venusiangguk]

hiii! I just finished reading 'idealisations concerning real life relations' and I am in tears. happy & sad tears. this is definitely in my top 5 fics overall and I am in love with it. your writing style is so beautifully crafted and flows so easily. it was extremely enjoyable to read. I love the moral of the story; how realistic it is and applies to real life circumstances which is why I believe that it feels so personal.

I adore the characterisations of both of them but am absolutely fuming at jk. obviously, it was your intention to portray him as an asshole which I think you achieved pretty successfully considering that myself and many others have mutual feelings towards him. & that ending... whew!!!

thank you so much for all of the hard work and dedication you spent on writing this beauty of a story, taking time out of your personal life to share such a heart-wrenching piece. it is greatly appreciated and I will be supporting you until the end! truthfully, I was not going to read it based on the reviews and I didn't know if I was ready to experience the pain n heartbreak. but I'm very happy that I did read it. I feel for oc, I really do. I can understand how others are mad at oc though. despite how naive she was, I'm still team oc /.\ mainly because I hate jks guts 😁😁

you have a passion for writing which is evident in your pieces. you're skilful at writing and I can't wait to read your other pieces as well as any other future pieces you release (if you choose to do so of course, am in no way trying to pressure you into writing, considering how long this work is!) have a good day or night, depending what time it is for you lmao. and get a good, restful break!! you deserve it <3 (sorry for how long this is, just wanted to voice my appreciation for this masterpiece.)

wow thank you for such an in depth message <3 im so happy you gave it a chance and liked it despite it being so angsty!! i really tried to make it at least semi realistic (for ff lmao) so it means a lot that u were able to take that away from the story !!they both had their flaws for sure but i understand why jk takes the heat lol i’ll get back to writing soon, just taking a lil breather before starting something! thank u for looking forward to it :)

[polsocmartikhoras]

They better watch themselves see it's very weird but so much of stuff works because of public perception

If it comes out that effectively the state can infinitely indict on almost poor evidence it's going to lead to a cry for reform because if rich powerful white guys can basically get spam locked

By a legal maneuver and this is considered perfectly fine to do out in public for the purpose of the one election almost everyone actually pays attention to?

That effectively they are saying that this is a form of abuse of the law that we illegalize and want to keep doing

It's not an action that we can take that might be abused but we do not so it's not necessarily to take it away

It's something that is abused and It arranged to be abused to take away

Sort of like how when it suddenly came out that a School to prison pipeline started jailing a lot of Midwestern white kids that suddenly people kind of well woke up to the fact that yes put over policing and tough on crime policies are basically a form of State sake sanction torture

Or if you don't believe that at the very least much like when suddenly the primary face of addiction switched from black people in the inner city to white people everywhere going on math suddenly the emphasis on oh wait it's a medical If you got a lot more traction

Whether this was a chicken or the egg situation that doesn't change the fact that it very much altered the character and acceptance on the war on drugs and how we both prosecute and perceive it

That and yes this was a deliberate instance of pharmaceutical companies pressuring doctors in order to create a scope of drug addicts

Long with the massive fast and much more widespread growing economic depression then followed by the abuse and as such seeing something that was often dismissed as an excuse at such a large and obvious scale that people had to admit that the argument Had way too much merit to simply be dismissed and should at the very least be factored in to how we deal with drugs as a societal issue

And as such much more mainstream and accepted legalization of soft drugs and an emphasis on recovery as opposed 2 one strike and you're forever in the felon zone where you cannot get out

They are effectively making the same problem by using the apparatus of state and law enforcement against Trump like this unless they can get some very valid follow through

More importantly even if they win I'm gonna be a little suspicious if for some reason the crimes they actually nail him on don't give cause for investigation for anyone else and despite the white spread Practice that must be in place for some bizarre reason only he needs to be prosecuted

See the Epstein case oh no by the way I totally believe he killed himself people who are facing less than life and prison for child trafficking attempt suicide what's they are arrested

This is such a known factor that it's why even if you're being held in holding for maybe a night

For the crime of voidering they'll take away your shoe strings and a bunch of other stuff

To prevent both fights and self-harm

The fact that he was a key figure in a massive upper class human trafficking and child exploitation case and he was allowed enough freedom to kill himself is very much the incompetence on Display for me

Simply put he very much would have been obliged and likely wanting to kill himself but it should have been the job of anybody that was holding him to make sure that never happened and yet it did

And because of the handling of that case almost everyone suspects all of the elites of society of either being his clients or not caring about his victims or caring more about punishing or hurting the lower class criminals the people who exploit others they have by this miss handling made it clear that there is one group of people and another and they feel the protection and power of a legal institution

Or some have just come to absolutely despise the federal law enforcement apparatus and believe that it cannot be trusted and must be depiwered in every way shape or form

It's not blue lives matter versus all cops are b******* it's keep the local sheriff but get rid of the feds versus Get rid of the pigs but make sure I can still call in the big guns in order to get everybody to behave for me

Why is everybody trying to turn admission into the equivalent of an internet forum with unaccountable moderators? Who they believe are going to be the best people?

All this because we didn't elect a woman God sakes folks you interrupt the femme Dom fans one time!

In case you're just checking in, here's the scoreboard:

INDICTMENTS 3 (so far), IMPEACHMENTS 2

[aaronhotchswife]

BABYSITTING AT HOTCH'S

A/N : This one shot is settled in season 7 (because even if every seasons Hotch does something to me, this one is🧎🏻‍♀️) and even if I absolutely ADORE Beth, for the purpose of the story she's not in a relationship with Aaron 🫶🏼

TW : smut, dom Hotch/sub reader, chocking, a nal fingering, unprotected sex (pls be careful)

-------

"No, it's alright. I'll find someone. Yes, thank you. Have a good evening too."

Aaron hung up the phone, sighing.

"Everything ok Hotch ?" you asked, as you enter his office.

"Ah yes. I have a meeting for budget tonight and Jess can't babysit Jack so I need to find someone. Don't worry about that. What's going on ?"

"I have these files for you." you responded, hanging him the files. "You know, if it could help you, I can watch Jack tonight."

"I can't let you do that. It's Friday night, you probably have plans."

"C'mon Hotch. You know how Jack and I like each other. And even if I am a woman in my 20s, everything Friday nights I just want to go home and watch Netflix, especially with the weeks we have." you laughed slightly.

"I get that." he chuckled. "Are you sure ? I mean, I would like that but I don't want you to feel obligated."

"I would be happy to help." you said to him, a soft smile on your lips.

"It's settled then. Do you think you could go pick him up at school ? I'll call them to let him know."

"No problem, sir."

You knew Jack since a couple years now. He always liked you and everytime he went to the BAU he was always happy to draw at your desk and your drawer was filled with his masterpieces. It was nice to hang out with him, talking about his school drama and honestly spending a friday night with a kid was in your opinion, a lot better than spending it with Tinder dates. So spending your Friday night with him wasn't a chore at all.

-------

"Hey Jack! You know that your Dad's triathlon is soon right ? What would you think if we make him signs ?" you told Jack, while he was washing his hands.

"Oh yes!!! It's such a good idea !"

"Great! Where do you guys keep the crafting stuff?"

Jack took your hand and showed you a drawer in his bedroom with colored pencils and glitters and all. You took all that you guys going to need and walked downstairs to the kitchen. You spend most of the night helping Jack creating his banner, only stopping to cook dinner. He helped you cleaning the kitchen before taking his bath and asking you for a bedtime story.

"And they lived happily ever after." you read softly, before closing the book.

Jack was peacefully sleeping, still holding onto your arm. You left a sweet kiss of his forehead, wishing him good night before going downstairs to wait for Hotch.

-------

When Aaron came home later that night, he walked to the living room where he found you asleep on the couch, a blanket draped to your body, hair in your face, Before he could stop himself, his eyes trailed the expanse of skin that you’d left exposed. He never realized how beautiful you look, especially in that dimed light, so peacefully sleeping. He tried to do as little noise as possible as he walked towards you, replacing your hair behind your ear. He decided to go look on Jack, telling himself he'll wake you up after. He was sleeping serenely, his Star Wars night light illuminating the room. He wished him a good night buddy before closing the door. When Aaron saw you again, you were in the same position, breathing evenly. He tried whispering your name but nothing could make you move. Not knowing what got into him, he took you bridal style in his arms, carefully, for you to not wake up and he walked towards to guest bedroom, where you'll be a lot more comfortable. He didn't want to wake you up, sleep was important especially with your job and you look so peaceful that waking you up was not a option. In the guest bedroom, he tucked you in, hesitating before leaving a light kiss on your forehead and wished you good night, before closing the door. He suprised himself with a feeling in his stomach from the way you were laid in one of his bed, beautifully sleeping.

You woke up the next morning in a room you didn't know. With the smell of the bed sheets, you realize you probably fell asleep at Hotch's house but the fact the you're in a bed is something you can't remember. You got up, streching your arms and yawning before going downstairs to the kitchen. You see Jack watching cartoons and Aaron in the kitchen, making coffee.

"Good morning." you said, shyly.

"Hey, good morning. I'm sorry, you fell asleep on the couch and I didn't want to wake you up, so I put you in the bed instead. For you to be more comfortable you know...Hope it was ok." he responded timidly.

"Oh. Yeah, yeah. Sorry I didn't want to fell asleep. Rough week." you chuckled, a bit suprised by his answer. "How was your meeting ?"

"Well, you know how the superiors are." he said, smiling softly. "Want coffee?"

"Yes please, that would be great."

"There you go." he grins, handing you a cup of coffee. You smiled, taking your first sip. "So Jack wants pancake for breakfast, do you want to eat with us ? I mean it's Saturday, we don't have work to do...yet." he tells you.

You were a bit taken aback by his proposition. Not that you didn't want to eat with them but eating breakfast at your boss's house seemed like a weird idea. But it was Saturday and pancakes couldn't hurt and you kinda wanted to spend more time with him.

The three of you sat at the table, Jack speaking about what he wanted to do today. The weather wasn't really on your side, rain falling hard outside. It was a bit too domestic for you to be sitting at the table with your hot boss and his child. But you didn't know that Aaron felt the same. You seemed to noticed that he looked more relaxed when Jack is there, his usual frown on his face not visible, making jokes and being all paternal. It was weird seeing him like that. Of course you see Jack often but it's always at work so you never had the chance to see him really being a father.

"Dad, can we watch a movie today ?" Jack asked, his mouth full of pancakes.

"Of course buddy, what would you wanna watch?"

"Mmmh, The Little Mermaid ! Can Y/N watch it with us dad ?"

You almost chocked on your sip when you heard Jack asking that. Hotch seemed clearly taken aback with his demand as you.

"Well, if she wants, I mean, do you want to ?" Hotch asks, looking at you.

"Well, The Little Mermaid was one of my favourite movie when I was younger so why not. As long as I'm not interrupting."

"It was ?!" Jack asked, amazed. "Dad looks like Prince Eric don't you think?"

"Hahaha, yeah I can see it." you responded, looking at Aaron, his cheeks getting red.

After breakfast you help Hotch cleaning the kitchen while Jack was playing Lego, waiting for the two of you to be ready for the movie. The thunder outside made the ambiance cozy as you sat on the sofa. Aaron joined, sitting next to Jack who was happy to cuddle his father.

Even if you loved The Little Mermaid and knew the movie by heart, watching movies during the day wasn't really doing it for you. Especially after eating, the chances of you falling asleep were high. Hotch seemed to notice that as you fell asleep right on his shoulder. He didn't dare to move, you looking too cute your head on his shoulder.

"Y/N." Aaron murmured, shaking you a little. "The movie's over."

"Aaron." you said, sleepily.

The use of his first name was unusual for you. Always calling him Hotch or sir or boss, but never Aaron. The feeling he had in his stomach the night before was back and he couldn't push it away.

"Where's Jack?"

"JJ's house. Henri called for a playdate." Hotch answered, his eyes in yours.

He couldn't help but look at you, all shy on his sofa. Your cheeks getting red, your eyes in his and slowly looking down to his lips. You always knew he was beautiful, always looking at him at work, at his features. But you never knew he looked that beautiful, dressing normally, in his living room, so close one another. Before you knew it, your lips were on his, tasting the sweet taste of pancakes and the dry taste of his coffee. The kiss was soft, rather inquisitive, both of your lips learning each others. When you both back off to take a breath, you gazed up at him, flustered, a small shy smile on your lips.

"You are so pretty." Aaron murmured, his forehead on yours.

"So are you." you said chuckling a little.

He chuckled slightly, not believing he was kissing you, leaving a couple of kisses on your forehead, down to your jaw before going back to your mouth. The kiss was more heated and his hands quickly found their way to your hips, pressing them slightly. This action made a moan come out your mouth and Aaron couldn't help himself from bitting your lower lips.

"Come here." he murmured, pointing his lap.

You did as asked, grinding yourself on him, feeling him getting hard. His mouth moved to your neck, nibbling on your sweet spot near your ear.

"Want to continue this in the bedroom ? I mean, if you want of course." he asked, his lips on your ear.

You follow him in his bedroom, anticipating what's going to happen. Hotch pushed you gently on the bed before hovering you, his lips on your jaw and his hands on your hips. Grinding himself a little on you, he moved his mouth to your collarbone, sucking on your skin. Your hands found their way on his back, tucking on his shirt to take it off.

"Do you really want to do this?" he asked, his eyes in yours.

"I do. Please."

"How do you wanna do it ?"

"I want you to do everything you want to me Aaron."

His hand went between your legs, grabbing the place where you wanted him the most. You could feel yourself being wet, cyprine making it's way to your thighs. He helped you take off his shirt and yours, his eyes going down on your breast covered in your lace emerald bra. Your chest was raising up and down, your hands cupping his face. Aaron kept his eyes in yours before kissing down your chest, unclipping your bra, moving his lips to the hem of your jeans. He looked at you, as if he was asking for permission. You nodded slightly, wanting him to put his mouth down there already.

"Words baby."

"Yes please Aaron."

He took off your pants, kissing your stomach before kissing down your thighs, pushing them apart slowly. He left a kiss on your panties, your respiration becoming more and more rapid. He pulled your panties aside, licking a long strip from your folds. You moaned, hands gripping his hair. He then placed his lips against your folds, nibbling against your clit. He pushed one finger in, then two, your hips rocking against his mouth, wanting more. Sucking your clit, he lifted your legs on his shoulders, weighting your torso down on the bed with one hand on your lower stomach. Your moans were becoming more and more loud and you knew you would be cumming soon. Aaron knew it too because his mouth left your core to leave small kisses near your hips.

"On your knees." he ordered.

You did as asked, unzipping his pants before taking off his boxers. You told yourself he was big but not that big. You gasp in suprise, making Aaron chuckled.

"What's going on sweetheart ? Too big for you ? You're gonna open your mouth and make it fit like a good girl."

You nodded, approaching your lips to his member but he stopped yourself, tucking of your hair.

"When I speak I want an answer. Are you gonna suck my dick like a good girl?"

"Yes."

"Yes who?" he asked, his hands putting your hair in a make shift ponytail.

"Yes sir."

You kissed his balls, moving your lips to his member, keeping eye contact with him. You sucked on his head before taking him all in your mouth, his head going deep into your throat making you gag. He pushed your head slightly, making back and forth movements. Salive coming out your mouth, your mascara running down your cheeks.

"Fuck. You look so pretty on your knees for me. I'm gonna cum and you're gonna swallow everything alright ?"

You took his dick out of your mouth to answer him, crying a yes sir before taking him back in your mouth. His respiration was twitching and you could hear him groaned, his cock twitching in your mouth. A hot substance making it's way down your throat. You stuck your tongue out to proved to him that you swallowed everything.

"Go on the bed, on your hands and knees."

Positioning yourself on all four, you almost screamed when his hand slapped your ass, hearing Aaron chuckled at your reaction. His fingers runned down your pussy, his mouth finding it's way between your folds again. You couldn't help but moaned, the sensation being too good.

"I want to put my mouth and my fingers everywhere, in all your holes. Would you be okay with that?" he asked, fingers in your pussy.

"Yes sir."

Without you saying more, he put his tongue on your asshole, licking it.

"Gonna make it nice and ready for my thumb, right sweetheart ?"

You couldn't talk, only responding by a moan. The feeling of his tongue down there was so good, better than anything you had before. You felt his thumb running near your asshole before entering you. You couldn't help but make a muffled pleasure scream, rocking your ass on his finger. His thumb in your ass and his tongue in your pussy was a combination you could only dreamed about.

"Mmmh, you taste so good, like I imagined it."

This did it for you, hearing him say he imagined doing these things to you. Before you knew it, you came on in mouth and fingers.

"Oh my baby made a mess. She will help cleaning that right ?" he said, his fingers on your lips making you open your mouth to suck on his fingers. He kissed you, his tongue fighting for dominance. His lips moved to your ear, murmuring sweet things to you.

"I'll fuck you good baby, and you're gonna take all of me in you. I'll fuck you until you become a mess in your boss's bed."

His hands reached your ass, spreading your thighs slightly before pushing himself in you. He was so big and you let out a cry. His fingers brushed your hair, letting you time to adjust yourself to his size. He kissed your ear, before thrusting slowly.

"Is this alright love ? I'm not too rough on you ?" he murmured in your ear.

The way he was dominating but at the same thing caring for you to feel safe was something that could create butterflies in your stomach.

"It's good Aaron. You make me feel so good, I promise."

You heard his chuckled slighty, still thrusting slowly into you.

"Harder."

"Beg for it."

"Please sir, I need you to fuck me harder please."

He didn't need more than that for him to thrust harder, his balls punching against your pussy. Both of your were moaning and your moans became louder when his fingers found their way to your clit, pinching it. His thrust were becoming sloppier each time and the familiar knot in your stomach was back.

"I'm gonna fill you up." you heard him say, one of his hand grabbing your throat, squeezing it softly. His other hand grabbed your nipple, pinching it. Your fingers found their way to your clit, finishing the job he first started. A few moments later, you felt the hot substance in your core, cumming at the same time.

Aaron fell next to you, his hand tracing little circles on your shoulders.

"Thank you for that." you looked up to him, shyly.

The confidence you had during your sexy moment was now gone and you couldn't help but feel shy, even if he just fucked the hell out of you.

"I've been dreaming of doing that for a long time." he smiled, his fingers brushing your hair behing your ear.

"What does that mean for us ?"

"What do you mean?" he frowned.

"Well at work...and in real life."

"Well, at work we could sign some papers but for starters what would you say if I asked you out on a date first ?"

You blushed, kissing his nose before agreeing.

"But first I want another round, soft this time." you murmured.

[oonajaeadira]

Hello! Absolutely no obligation at all to answer this, you just seem really lovely and approachable. Any words of advice you would be willing to share for someone who sort of just arrived here accidentally because they are chronically behind the times and didn’t realize there was a bandwagon and is now utterly terrified to interact anywhere in the fandom lest they make a problem worse and/or get lumped in with the portion of the bandwagon that is…erm, overboard and a bit scary?

(Which isn’t to say you or anyone else is being intimidating on purpose of course. Everyone seems lovely, the anxiety is just REALLY committed to winning this round.)

(Second add-on before I forget, your writing is absolutely bloody brilliant by the way. Thank you for sharing it with us!)

Hello you lovely, lovely, lovely human. <3

Breathe and stick close, honeybee. This is a good corner of the fandom....at least from where I'm sitting.

To be totally honest, I know that there's a lot of horror in the fandom, but I've actually not seen a lot of it with my own eyes. That's because when I landed here, I basically just kinda sat and observed folks for a hot second, started writing, and let friendlies come to me. If someone or the mutuals they would interact with seemed like a lot of drama, I mainly steered clear. My best friends here mostly approached me and were kind and gentle and funny and respectful to the man we all love. And because of that, I've pretty much just curated a really lovely corner of the fandom for myself.

As someone who deals with anxiety and depression though, I get you. Coming into a place where there are SO MANY of fans and cliques and strong friendships feels intimidating...like starting at a new school/job. There's really no short answer though. Like anything else, settling in and finding your folks and your path takes a little time.

You seem to be doing alright so far though...you marked me as someone safe to approach. So your powers of observation are working! Good start! 😄

But nobody's going to assume you're one of the scary ones right off the bat. Being kind and offering up a bouquet of niceness (like you did in your ask) opens the door up real quick.

So my question for you is...where do you want to live in this fandom? Are you a fic writer? A gif maker? An artist? A reader? A reblogger? If one of the first three, then start creating, kitkat! Learn how to tag your stuff and those who love it will find you! If you're a reader, I guarantee the fastest way to spread goodwill and make artists start to recognize your callsign and appreciate you is by reblogging and commenting on their work. I can't emphasize that enough--creators don't get paid for their work here. They share their creations in exchange for interaction and community. They want to scream joyfully about the fandom with other fans. Please, for the love of Pedro, come scream with us!

And that, my friend is what you bring to the table.

That's all you have to do. Openly share joy. Do it by sharing your art/stories/talents or by sharing the work of others and your love of it. And if you happen to share your joy with someone but don't receive it back from them, then you've found someone who may not be worthy of your collection of the fairest folk. That's okay. There are a hundred more who will acknowledge your joy. Turn around and you'll walk right into them around here.

But if you have anxiety, it's okay to go slow. Starting on anon is good, helps you get some practice in before you're ready for your debut. Just remember what my buddy @insomniamamma says..."the anon button is not for hate. It's for horny and embarrassed about it."

You'll get over the embarrassment soon enough once you realize we're all pretty horny (including sappily horny for fluff and romance) around here. Don't judge yourself for it. We sure won't!

Post some joy. Reblog some work with an "I love this!" Join in an ask game. All of those are loved around here.

And do it on your own terms. Take the time you need.

Nobody's gonna think you're one of the overwhelming ones, love. They'll just think you're one of the thirsty ones. And that's nothing to be ashamed of once you realize that you're no different from everyone else in your new favorite corner of the fandom.

(gif by damerondjarin)