#the what if scenario basically being:

[mercuryislove]

55k words into this writing exercise that was only intended to be at most 2k words........

[merakiui]

what if jade was actually more of a perv than Floyd and Azul combined underneath that (⁠ ⁠◜⁠‿⁠◝⁠ ⁠) façade

This is exactly how I see him!!!! He's such a freak!!!!!! Even more so than Floyd and Azul. In terms of shamelessness, I like to imagine Jade is at the very top spot. He's just so,,,, depraved. The type of man to shamelessly sport an erection while you're lecturing him about how annoying he is or something degrading like that, and he just stands there like (˶ᵔ ᵕ ᵔ˶) and waits for you to notice LOL. I also just think things like erections in human form aren't something embarrassing for Jade and, by that extension, Floyd because it's something they aren't used to dealing with in mer form and they just don't understand why it's such a big deal if people see because, as Floyd will note, "everyone's got junk, so who cares?" Azul gets flustered over things like that because 1) he's easy to fluster and 2) he wants to actually blend in with human society and not be labeled a pervert right away like a certain pair of eels. ^^;;;

Part of me wants to push the Jade is a feet guy agenda because his dorm groovy is so,,,,, T_T but then I feel like that makes sense for Jade to be the one with the foot/leg fetish??? He's spent all of his life playing the "normal" twin or the "responsible" twin because that's how he was always told apart from Floyd. He's much too calculated to just let loose like Floyd does and he has an image to uphold, so he probably just masks all of his perverted behaviors so well you'll never know. But then he does things like offering to shine your shoes or tie your laces or something silly like that and he's hopelessly hard the entire time. You can't even kick him in his dick because there's a 100% chance he'll just enjoy it. T_T you tell him to go die and he's fanning himself like wooooo teehee :3c it's suddenly so hot in here...

Jade knows exactly what he's doing. He is so down bad for you, too. You could tell him you'll die before you ever go out with him and he just becomes even more invested in playing this long, impossible game of waiting. I like to think he gets creative and humorous with his attempts at flirting. Maybe this makes him look a little pathetic, but is that not part of his charms? That, or it's just another artfully crafted façade meant to hide a much more coy demeanor.

He has a list of things he wants to accomplish with you and within the top five is probably a footjob. You kicked him in his ankles after he showed you the list (complete with a handwritten note asking you if you'd help him study anatomy later), and he had to excuse himself to the bathroom to deal with personal issues. :) your violence is just more fuel for his fantasies.

[trentcrimminallybeautiful]

i think the diamond dogs should play improv games just bc it would amuse me, an ex theater kid, specifically

[pkmoth]

having swap au thoughts. *slaps roof of claus* there's so much mental illness in this guy. im gonna blow up everyone in the room and then myself

[thedroloisms]

What’s really frustrating is seeing people say “Tommy should’ve known”/“How did Tommy NOT know about his behavior” and it’s just not something you say? Ever? It’s like asking Shelby how she didn’t see the warning signs. When you’re deep in it— when you’re THAT close to someone— you’re going to not see the red flags that someone on the outside might be able to see. Tommy’s an immature guy and he fucked over Dream, yes. However he’s probably reeling over the realization his “big brother” abused someone.

god, for sure. ive also seen people talk about how "if you saw him manipulating you and your friends why didn't you SAY ANYTHING!!!" and it's just ... i'm sorry uh. do you guys not. understand. like there's a power dynamic? there's a power dynamic here people. that's ,,, part of how manipulation in this manner works. like, i know people are saying this because they don't like the person in question, and while i'm not exactly their biggest fan either, being a shitty person doesn't prevent you from being a victim, and vice versa. like, just because you might not like this person or think that they're a shitty person bc of various reasons doesn't make victim blaming suddenly okay, you know.

[codacheetah]

I keep thinking of how I want to taxonomize Siffrin and Loop bc it feels significant to me that Loop and Siffrin both have inherently diverged from the same Traveler Mold they came from. But because I am like a 7 year old I keep sagely nodding to myself going "ah yes... just like mega mewtwo"

[watermelonsloth]

Naruto Incorrect Quotes But They Aren’t Funny Part 1

Hashirama: Do you really hate me that much?!

Tobirama: How could I hate you?! I don’t-! I don’t even know who you are anymore! You just left me! You left me all alone! We used to be best friends! I wanted to be just like you! So… when father started preparing you to be clan head, it made me want to learn leadership too…

Hashirama: Leader-? What does my position have to do with any of this?

Tobirama: Father never wanted to teach me! He was only ever interested in his eldest! So when you got bored and ditched me to play at that dumb river, I had to man up for you!

Hashirama: …

Tobirama: He did everything he could to get me to quit. To prove I wasn’t good enough. But I hung in there hoping you’d come back, so we could be like we were. I tried to make it all seem so important so you’d realize what you’d be missing. But you just shut me out! All you cared about was your stupid friend!

Hashirama: Hey, that’s not fair, dad was the one who kept us separate-

Tobirama: OH DONT GIVE ME THAT BULLSHIT! You didn’t even try to fight him on it! Since we started this village all I’ve seen you do is fight for what you care about!

Tobirama: …So what…? Was it me…? Was I just not worth the effort…? We used to be so close. But maybe that was all in my head. So how dare you accuse me of hating you WHEN YOU CLEARLY NEVER GAVE A SHIT ABOUT ME!

Hashirama: …I had no idea…

Tobirama: …

Tobirama: …Just leave me alone. You’ve had enough practice.

—•—

Next

[mxwhore]

learned a very valuable lesson today

[waywardsalt]

im thinking about possession aftereffects that linebeck experiences immediately after the events of phantom hourglass, so here are bullet points i have down for my own ideas

he’s out cold for roughly five days after the fight. he’s conscious for a bit after being freed, but it doesn’t take long for him to collapse once he’s transported back to the great sea. link finds him when he reaches his ship to see him again (he takes a lifeboat or w/e from tetras ship its a whole thing and not the point) and ends up having to take care of him for those five-ish days.

while he’s out cold, he develops a bad fever, and has a good few physical injures from being possessed; all of his wounds from being possessed manifest as burns, the worst wounds bring cauterized and mostly closed, while smaller ones are still open wounds. the largest wound is a large burn covering most of his back, which is cauterized by the time he passes out, and then there are smaller, still open burns on his upper arms and legs. (the smaller wounds are manageable by link when he follows some medical instructions, [there are some medical books on the ship] the larger one is also manageable, but takes a lot longer to properly heal).

(link asks tetra and her crew to stick around for a while to keep linebeck stabilized while he’s unconscious. when linebeck wakes up, tetra and her crew are good to leave because then linebeck can better report what’s going on, and knows how to handle injuries).

linebeck’s fever persists after he wakes up, and he experiences… pretty much every fever symptom, with especially bad chills and full-body aches. the aches are really bad for the first few days after he wakes up, he’s extremely physically weak and shaky for a while, too. that weakness and shakiness get better with time, but he doesnt go entirely back to normal without actually moving around and doing things to build that strength back up.

he’s delirious and struggles to stay awake for those first few conscious days, too, which makes that weakness and shakiness worse; he struggles to eat and drink water, and struggles to string together thoughts or words to talk to link, and both of them figure out pretty quickly that they’ll have to wait a bit longer before so much as an attempt to coax him out of bed can be made.

beyond existing problems with food, linebeck struggles to keep anything down while he recovers, and becomes ill pretty much every time after he eats anything, so a bucket is kept near his bed. with water, he obviously needs to drink a lot of it considering that he’s feverish, injured, and vomiting frequently, but while he’s sick he has a bit of an irrational fear of water (along with an irrational fear of air and the wind, which makes him hesitant to go outside while he’s sick).

he’s generally pretty irritable, which isn’t particularly new, but it makes him prone to refusing help with certain things. he’s less irritable when tired and just resting. he’s also especially nervous, and despite the overall fatigue, he struggles to sleep for very long while he’s sick, and as said before, is often delirious and even confused when things are bad.

along with the other difficulties eating, linebeck has a hard time swallowing for a bit, and salivates a lot more than normal while he’s sick. he is soooo fucking dehydrated the whole time and that really doesn’t help.

while the weakness and shakiness stays for the entire time he’s sick and even a bit afterwards, for the first few days after he wakes up he’s stiff and also experiences some muscle spasms and numbness in his limbs, and has a hard time keeping his balance the first few times he gets out of bed.

once the sickness clears up fully, linebeck has to still be careful with the scar on his back; it’s sensitive to touch for a while and hurts when exposed to the sun or air for too long and when he stretches his back too far, but eventually just reaches the point where it’s a bit sensitive but is otherwise just a large scar.

obviously he’s also going through the wringer in an emotional and mental illness sense too but those would require a whole new bullet point list.

[luna7822]

congradulations assholes

u all finally got that stupid ass victory that u ppl so lovingly beg for absolutely no reason other than just to find more petty excuses to boost ur ego and outright splat any other ppl from different teams on site as if any of u dont know how to play like fair for once in ur pathetic fucking life and admittingly i do feel bad for shiver too since she actually had smth that i could agree with for once (vanilla aside) and that u assholes pretty much decided to be absolute jerks throughout the whole damn thing all cuz im on her team as if splatfests and final/seasonalfests in general were never meant to be taken srsly in the first place and overall to any stupid ass stans/spawn campers out there i wish u all a very happy go fuck urself for basically never giving me a fair fucking chance for once whatsoever and for honestly being the worst fucking idol f**base to ever exist in general so yeah

[beatriceportinari]

Different anon, but now I gotta know what your Ideal Izuna fic would be haha

Hiiiiiii great question.... the hard part abt izuna is that he isn't really a character and when he is he is better dead. so if you want him making sense in your story he's either kind of a different person (wass route) or a ghost (spider lily route). otherwise he si just hanging out in the background awkwardly bc he shouldn't be there!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Now as someone acutely aware of this and also not a writer (your humble servant) it is hard for me to say what he /should/ be doing in fics. A ghost would be nice (hi ed). Canon route where his story is told by someone else (preferrable in a way he would hate <3) is good too. Posession is nice as well! I read one where he was posessing sasuke that i was ultimately not too convinced by but the premise is good. Perhaps he could posess a sword like that shisui fic I mentionned... wouldn't that be nice a prized Konoha heirloom that's actually Izuna. Stuck there.

[hella1975]

just full force threw a shoe at my sister's face and when my mum got me alone after she was like 'you shouldn't clobber her. but i get it' 😭

[scarycranegame]

>be me

>get new follower

>hellyes.wav

>look at their profile

>they're very obviously an antishipper

feelsbadman

[minakoaiinos]

Twitter getting obsessed with conspiracy theories about where redacted is makes me feel so fucking terrible when there is so much worse going on that people are literally begging you to pay attention to but instead you want to focus on scenarios you made up in your head and play true crime detective

[r-biter]

az for the character bingo. your relationship w him fascinates me

Put gently, i need him dead, but he IS like the most interestingly weird person in the IC likely.

[sableprince]

got a prompt for some ria/jazzmine angst, but jazzmine's slapstick comedy armor (its like plot armor but dumber) is too powerful. i guess the only girlfriend the grim reaper should have is an unkillable one.