#then again. i also am watching a 13 hour lore video (which is 1 of 3 btw) of my fav game so... you could say im a lore enjoyer 💀

[princekirijo]

I really wanna sit down and make a proper timeline of events for Captain AU, it would def make it easier to talk about stuff then

[andrewologist]

My Antisepticeye Theory

Notes

“Lore Seán” is Jack, and Seán is “real life Seán.”

While I tried to find as many videos as possible, most social media posts will be excluded. Many of the captions have since changed, bios and avatars have gone back to normal, and posts are buried deep. Many of them are irrelevant at this point.

So everything is easy to read, things originally in zalgo text will be bolded.

This is the longest post I’ve ever made. I’m so sorry. It’s all under the cut.

Some of this probably sucks. Feel free to prove me wrong.

It’s a long shot, but I’d love to hear @therealjacksepticeye‘s opinion on this stuff.

2016

May 1

Reading your comments #90

In a reading your comments video, someone asks “What do you think of antiseptic?” and Jack says “WHERE?! Don’t joke about that!”

While this is a joke, it’s also the first acknowledgement of Anti.

July 10

Welcome to the Game #2

Jackieboy Man’s first appearance.

August 11

Title: The Jacksepticeye Power Hour - Marvin’s Magic

Marvin the Magnificent’s first appearance.

September 15

Title: The Jacksepticeye Power Hour - Dr. Schneeplestein

Dr. Schneeplestein’s first appearance.

October 10

Anti’s first official appearance.

Title: THE START OF THE NIGHTMARE | Five Night at Freddy’s Sister Location #1

The bottom of the description reads “You’ve waited a long time, now I wake” and in the source code, one of the keywords is “snooping.” (I think that the keyword was added at a later date, but it is still significant)

The description suggests that Anti has been watching us for awhile, or at least knows that we created him. He’s calling us out in the source code, or maybe just observing.

A lot of this first video is Anti testing us, seeing how we react. He’s new at this point, so he doesn’t know much about the community and how we work.

October 13

Title: THEY HAVE AWOKEN | Five Night at Freddy’s Sister Location #2

Description says “follow the signs, release me.” In the source code, one of the keywords is “curious I see.”

Again, Anti is testing the waters, seeing what we do, how far we go for clues. He’s seeing if we obey him, if we are willing to “release” him out of pure curiosity.

When he says “release me” he’s asking us to follow him. Us believing in him/obeying him gives him power, which would help him escape.

As far as where he is trapped, I think that is Jack’s computer. This is why the face-cam can still glitch without Anti having a physical form. He’s manipulating the camera itself.

October 17

Title: BE THE BAT! | Batman Arkham VR

The whiteboard behind Jack says “I’M HERE.”

October 18

Title: SOMETHING INSIDE | Five Night at Freddy’s Sister Location #3

At 5:26, the glitch has Anti saying “I am near.” There is also multiple glitches that include Anti laughing.

In the description there is “I see you understand now, keep watching” and a keyword is “stronger.”

Anti has learned that we will still watch, even if it hurts Jack, because we are curious. This following has made him stronger.

Also in the description, there is a link to a video.

Title: SOON

In this video, there is general static, creepy music, and children laughing. Text that says “I’M HERE” shows up. The description says “Very good, you may be worthy” and Jack also left a comment that says “I’m glad I have your attention now.”

Anti now has the strength to make entire videos. He doesn’t have a physical form yet, but he is able to all of this from within in a computer. He has figured out how far we go for clues, and is taking full advantage of that.

The next video of the 18th also includes a small appearance.

Title: Temple of No!

At 11:10 Jack says “We all know about Anti don’t we?” and there is a slight glitch. This is important because it is a direct acknowledgment of Anti.

October 19

Tile: TOO MUCH WEIRD | Accounting (HTC Vive video)

Whiteboard reads “SOON.”

Title: PLEASE DON’T KILL ME | Hello Neighbor #2

9:45, the game glitches and then crashes, and Anti is seen in the face-cam.

The way Jack reacts to Anti messing with him is important. He almost pointedly ignores it/plays it off.

October 22

Title: MERGED TOGETHER | Five Night at Freddy’s Sister Location # 4

At 1:19, Jack complains that his eye is itching. This is the first time that Anti influences Jack’s body.

7:32, Anti says “I’m here.”

10:06, intense glitching, and then Jack slumps in his chair.

The end clip is Jack saying “I don’t feel so good.”

Description says “We are merged together now as one in Five Nights at Freddy’s Sister Location” and at the bottom it says “It’s almost time, I grow stronger.”

Jack becoming sick/weak happens after Anti says “I’m here.” This is implies that Anti has “merged together” with Jack, and is presenting as a virus.

Keywords, which were added in 2017, are “The doctor” and “can’t save.”

October 24

Title: SWIMMING IN POOP | Pipe Job (HTC Vive)

The end clip has Jack super close the the camera saying “Hi there, my name’s Jack” with a glitch after.

This glitch and the slight laugh he does suggests that this is Anti imitating Jack. Almost like he’s getting used to piloting his body.

October 26

Title: MEET THE YANGS | Guts and Glory #5

6:57, Jack coughs and there is a slight glitch. This suggests that Anti was the one to make Jack cough. He is making him sick.

October 28

Title: ALONE AND AFRAID | Layers of Fear #1

22:08, Anti laughs, and Jack acknowledges it. He says “The hell was that weird sound? Just came from my gully hole.” Again, he is pointedly ignoring Anti. He doesn’t say talk about it beyond this. More importantly, Anti is laughing through Jack.

The description says “It’s time to say goodbye” which emphasizes that Anti is taking over Jack’s body.

October 29

Title: SORE FROM LAUGHING | Stuntfest #2

2:19, there is a glitch when Jack coughs. Again, Anti is presenting as a virus.

So why is Anti presenting as a virus? Well, if he is a demon, then he is “possessing” Jack’s body. I think that the way he takes over his body is systematic. He takes over the immune system first so Jack is weaker and can’t fight back. Then he takes over the nervous system, which we will see in the following pieces of evidence. Simultaneously, he is a virus in Jack’s computer. He corrupts camera footage, crashes games, and screws up text.

October 30

Title: SCARIER THAN IT LOOKS | The Cubicle (HTC Vive)

White board says “DON’T WATCH.” This is generally out of character for Anti, who gains power from a following. So is it Anti who wrote this? While many people think it was Jack, I think it was Anti. He’s testing us and mocking us. He wants to see if we follow everything he says, or if we’re just curious enough to want to see what happens next. He knows that we are powerless.

3:47, Anti appears standing behind Jack. This is not an actual physical form. Instead, Anti is glitching the camera footage to make himself appear to be there. However, it is still significant that we see a full shot of what Anti looks like. He sees himself as a version of Jack.

7:24, the screen goes black and we hear “1, 2, Anti’s coming for you” and reversed audio of “and he’s dead.” This is Anti mocking us again, because he knows that we will continue to watch, even as Jack dies.

In the end clip, Anti stands in front of the camera saying “I have come” and when it switches back to normal, Jack looks genuinely scared and says “I could have sworn I just heard something.” Jack is really starting to notice that something is amiss.

The description says “Tomorrow ends him.”

Title: THE SIGNS ARE THERE | Layers of Fear #2

13:03, Jack talks about foreshadowing, and Anti glitches in to wink at us. Not a whole lot of significance, just one of the communities favorite gifs. ;)

The description says “It’s almost time.”

October 31

Title: SAY GOODBYE

Because there are so many glitches in this video, and because Anti is in a good chunk of it, I will only be discussing the parts that I find the most important.

4:21, Jack comments that the smell of the pumpkin isn’t making him feel good. There is intense glitching, and his nose starts bleeding. This is Anti affecting his immune/respiratory system. When he appears on screen after Jack leaves, that is him glitching the camera.

6:34, this glitch includes Jack twitching/yelling. It also has Anti reaching out and touching Jack. This is both aspects of Anti’s power shown at once. He is affecting Jack’s nervous system (rather severely), and the camera.

8:28, Jack hears banging/walking around in his apartment and walks off screen to investigate. Anti glitches himself in. The auditory allusion for Jack is Anti messing with his head, and for us it’s Anti messing with the audio.

10:37 starts Anti’s first major appearance. We all know what happens here, but my explanation is that Anti gained full control of Jack’s nervous system.

During this appearance we hear Jack say “help me” which means he is still alive, but is unable to escape and defeat Anti. Anti tells us “you could have stopped me, but you just watched as this happened.”

In the description it says “you wanted me so here I am.”

We all watched this video despite the warnings we were given, and Anti grew stronger because of this.

In the keywords, which were added in 2017, it says “I’m back” and “good puppet.”

To summarize 2016, Anti was brought into existence by the community. He grew stronger through that following. He infected Jack’s computer, then Jack himself. He presents as a virus because he attacks the immune system first. He eventually took over Jack’s body and trapped Jack in a place where he couldn’t fight back.

2017

January 25

Title: I’M SO SORRY | Detention #2

3:45, face-cam glitches and audio distorts as Jack reads “forgotten, or just too afraid to remember?” In this glitch, Anti is pointing at the camera, like he is accusing us.

The description says “forgotten, or just too afraid to remember.”

This phrase suggests that Jack has suppressed the events in October 2016.

February 4

Title: BROKEN INSIDE | Detention #3

There are two glitches in this video, but, more importantly, the description says “broken spirit, let me out” and one of the keywords is “antisepticeye.”

The fact that the description is in zalgo, and that a keyword is antisepticeye leads me to believe that Jack somehow found a temporary way to suppress Anti. This angered Anti, and he now wants to be let out again. Remember, all he has to do to get more strength is gain a following.

February 16

Title: BLOOD ON YOUR HANDS | Detention #4

The title itself is again pointing a finger at us for Jack’s defeat.

27:49, as Jack reads “memories are like a mirror, reflecting the true likeness of your soul” there are glitches and audio distortion. This is more of Anti blaming us and mocking us.

28:01, Jack reads “maybe you still want to forget, maybe you’re still afraid” in his Anti voice. Anti knows that he scared us and that we underestimated him.

The description reads “betrayal neglect mistake.” This can be taken as Anti saying we betrayed Jack by making the mistake of neglecting him. By neglecting him and paying attention to Anti, we gave Anti more power.

A keyword is “antisepticeye” again.

March 8

Title: ALWAYS WATCHING

At Jack’s Pax East panel, he played a video before he went on stage. As we all know, Anti appeared in this. Here are the things that I found important.

@broadway-of-life deciphered the beginning audio that was spliced together from previous videos as “Haha. Jack is dead. You’re too late.” I think Anti is bluffing. However, he did take over Jack’s body again.

“I’ve been here this entire time, keeping an eye on things.” This is significant because it confirms that Anti was never truly defeated, he was at least lurking in the background.

After Anti says “I’m always there, always watching” you can hear Jack say “help me” very faintly.

The description of the actual video says “you thought I was gone. Tried to replace me. I’m always here.” By “replace” he means that we tried to go back to Jack.

April 11

Title: The Jacksepticeye Power Hour - Chase Brody

This is Chase’s first appearance. In this video we learn that his wife, Stacy, left him, and that he has two kids.

June 12

Title: SPREADING THE SICKNESS | Epidemic

8:40, when Jack says “laughter is the best medicine for death” there is a glitch and Anti’s laughter.

June 24

Title: TRUST ME, I’M A DOCTOR | Bio Inc. Redemption #4

In the keywords, “cracks.”

July 31

Title: TOUGHER THAN EXPECTED | The Escapists 2 #2

Description says “need a doctor?”

August 3

Title: KILL JACKSEPTICEYE | Bio Inc Redemption

This video has the most individual glitches, so I will again only analyze the important parts.

0:36, Jack gets sick and runs off screen. Dr. Schneeplestein takes over the video. This confirms that Shneep knows who Jack is.

2:57, Schneep says that Jack has mood swings where he’s like “a completely different person.” This suggests that Anti and Jack inhabit the same body, and they alternate control.

4:20 (HA), Schneep confirms that he saved Chase’s life after his suicide attempt.

6:51, Schneep says that he ALMOST lost Jack once before. This further confirms that Anti didn’t actually kill Jack.

7:14, Schneep’s voice distorts as he says “system failure” and at 7:26 he says “once one goes down, they all go down.” This is more evidence for my theory that Anti takes over bodies systematically.

8:05, Schneep begins to acknowledge Anti’s existence. This makes him the most knowledgeable ego so far.

8:42, Anti’s appearance begins.

Anti says “they all follow me” and “we’ve always been in control.” This is basically Anti stating that he has control of all of the egos, and that he can get them to do whatever he wants. Furthermore, he calls them “my puppets.”

The description says “so concerned for your little boy, pay attention next time, who’s next?” and the keywords include the following “save him, virus, no, puppets, no strings on me.”

October 31

Title: The Jacksepticeye Power Hour - Jameson Jackson

This is JJ’s first appearance. However, the end of the video features an appearance from Anti. I actually do not believe JJ was ever good. He’s separate from Anti, but he was created by Anti.

Text appears during Anti’s appearance that says “still here, still watching, puppets, watching, smile” and JJ rips off his mustache while smiling.

November 22

Title: MEMORIES OF UNDERTALE | Heartbound

It is important to note that this is not an official appearance, but the audio distortion while Jack reads lines is really important. Here are the stand outs.

“I was like you once.”

“He’s not coming back. You did this.”

“What kind of person are you?” The original line is “What kind of person you are,” but Jack’s audio is glitched.

“You can’t stop me.”

“You’ll get your chance.”

December 17-18

Title: Overnight Watch

So this is one of the biggest events ever. I do not have a video of the full night, and therefore I cannot analyze it properly. If you have a video like this, please send it to me so I can update this section.

2018

May 4

Title: THE DOCTOR IS BACK | Gastric Bypass, Liposuction Surgery

18:56, Schneep bursts into the room and Jack says “Who are you?” This tells us that Jack doesn’t know who Schneep is, even though he saved Jack’s life.

May 5

Title: WATCH THIS WITH THE LIGHTS OFF | Stories Untold Chapter 1

“You are entering a realm that is unusual.” (See May 14)

22:06, Jack’s door opens behind him and he glitches into the TV.

May 6

Title: Barry Has A Secret

12:36, a first person sequence where Jack (or maybe Anti) catches us and presumably attacks us. My vote is that this is Anti catching us snooping. And we weren’t supposed to know that he’s back yet.

Title: THEY ARE LISTENING | Stories Untold Chapter 2

“This door leads to a place unknown to you before.” (See May 14)

30:29, floating cameras that look like eyes are watching the camera.

May 7

Title: THEY’RE HERE | Stories Untold Chapter 3

“You take a picture of a man. When you check the film, you realize the man is not in the picture.”

40:58, we hear “Jack. Jack. This is Chase. You need to wake up.” There is also morse code that translates to “where am I?” Obviously, Jack has been defeated once again by Anti. This happened during KJSE. However, Jack is unaware of his defeat this time.

May 8

Title: IT WAS ALL CONNECTED! | Stories Untold Chapter 4

“You see a man in front of you. This man looks strange, not like any man you have seen before. Suddenly, you realize you were looking in a mirror.” (See May 14)

45:07, Jack wakes up from a nightmare and says “I remember what he did to me.” This means that he either woke up from his coma, or just remembered what happened and is dreaming about it.

May 9

Title: Try to Fall Asleep!

3:33, Marvin is seen in the TV static.

11:15, Marvin is in the static.

11:20, “Jack you have to” in static. This statement mimics Chase’s from Stories Untold Chapter 3. 

11:42, Jack’s lighting turns red.

16:41, JJ in static after Jack says “can a doctor revive me?” This is JJ mocking Jack.

17:34, Marvin in static. These appearances are Marvin attempting to get through to Jack.

May 11

Title: TIE - A Game About Depression

In this video, the most important thing is that Chase confirms the fact that Jack is currently in a coma. 

“Foreshadowing” is a keyword. Not sure what to do with this. It could just relate to the game.

May 14

Title: Dark Silence

“You are entering a realm which is unusual” Chase is seen walking through hallways, confused and lost. There are lots of strange sounds.

“This door leads to a place unknown to you before” Chase obviously doesn’t know where he is.

“You see a man in front of you. This man looks strange, not like any man you have seen before. Suddenly, you realize you were looking in a mirror“ Chase sees Anti at the end of a hallway. He doesn’t know who he is, and is confused when Anti turns around. Chase sees himself at the end of the hallway. We know that it is Anti in Jack’s body, but Chase doesn’t.

In this sequence, we hear children crying and screaming. When Chase see’s Anti, he asks “Where are they? What do you want from me?”

At this point, we do not know the status of Chase’s kids. It is easy to assume that Anti took them.

The video ends with Anti running at Chase.

May 16

Title: EXPLORING AN ABANDONED HOSPITAL | Exiles

Jack wakes up confused and playing a game about being in a hospital. 

14:30, Jack’s eyes are bleeding and there’s whispering that is repeating “it’s all your fault, you did this.”

This video is Jack waking up after Chase’s disappearance. Anti comes after him again.

May 22

Title: I AM SO CREEPED OUT BY THIS! | First Winter

Two glitches with Jack bleeding out of his eyes.

26:02, there is a glitch as Jack says “let me out.” This is Jack asking to be let out again.

(Note: I am skipping Akinator and Transference. I do not find them important)

October 14

Title: 3 SCARY GAMES, 1 VIDEO #7

30:43, face-cam glitch and audio distortion as Jack says “time to take off the masks.”

Anti is tired of “playing pretend.”

October 22

Title: THIS GAME SCARED THE **** OUT OF ME | Watson-Scott Test #1

The end clip has Jack asking “are you playing a game right now?” In my opinion, this is Anti. He’s asking us if this is all a game to us, if we take him seriously or not.

December 1

Title: TIME IS BROKEN | Umfend

The title itself references a twitter bio of Jack’s on Halloween 2017 (JJ’s appearance).

End clip, Anti asks “do you remember?” Accompanied by a glitch. He’s mocking us once again.

December 16

Title: QUIT THE GAME TO WIN

Anti stares at the camera and comes off as unsettling and creepy with out a single glitch. His eye twitches in FUCKING MORSE CODE that says “Anti.” 

The end of the video has Anti saying “you passed the test, now let’s move onto the next phase” which tells us that Anti is toying with us again. He’s testing us further, because he already knows so much about us.

December 18

Title: Take Your Eyes Off The Screen

The title was originally “Simulacra Pipe Dreams.” Anti changed it.

The thumbnail had “2019″ in the corner very faintly. It has since changed.

By giving us a vague date, Anti has made us want him to appear, has made us excited to see him. He’s going to have a lot of power during his next appearance.

[lairofsentinel]

Rules: answer these 85 questions and tag 20 people

tagged by @bluegrumps​

(I’m not tagging people)

— what was your last…

1. drink: mate (counts? it’s a south American beverage. I'm an alcohol-free peson)

2. phone call: My doctor, to make an appointment

3. text message: One of my friends (he is like a brother to me)

4. song you listened to: Dubstep _ Instrumental Core - The Angels Among Demons

5. time you cried: a year and a half more or less. When my father died.

__ have you ever…

6. dated someone twice: No.

7. kissed someone and regretted it: I regretted the relationship, because she used me, but no. I liked kissing my partner in all my relationships. (Or you mean outside a relationship? Never did that)

8. been cheated on: Oh... god. Twice. My first relationship, and my second and most meaningful one. The feeling of not being enough is horrible when this keeps happening like a habit. I have this certainty that my relationships will end in that way, always. 

9. lost someone special: Who didn't?.

10. been depressed: Since teenage. Ups and downs.

11. gotten drunk and thrown up: Never

— fave colours

12. Black

13. Dark red

14. Brown

— in the last year have you…

15. made new friends: I guess I did. I think.

16. fallen out of love: No.

17. laughed until you cried: A couple of months ago. One of my friends is hilarious... he makes me laugh and cry at the same time.

18. found out someone was talking about you: No.

19. met someone who changed you: No. I changed because I had to pass an exam, and I acquired really good habits that I keep them.

20. found out who your friends are: No. I know long time ago.

21. kissed someone on your facebook friends list: What? no. How specific this one is

— general

22. how many of your facebook friends do you know irl: 70%. The rest are online friends. I hope I can meet them personally. Eventually.

23. do you have any pets: My dog. She is called Maia.

24. do you want to change your name: Please, yes. I wish so much to change it... but Law is so binary, that never considered that option for us.

25. what did you do for your last birthday: Nothing. I try to make everyone forget my birthday.

26. what time did you wake up today: 3.45 am. Ughhh.

27. what were you doing at midnight last night: Trying to sleep.

28. what is something you can’t wait for: Shadowhunters new episodes. And More Magnus Bane.

30. what are you listening to right now: The sound of the Void. Aka, silence.

31. have you ever talked to a person named tom: Never.

32. something that’s getting on your nerves: People full stopping in middle of the street just to watch their phones, while I'm walking super fast behind them, and bump them, and then they are upset. Like, Fucker!. You are the one in middle of the street watching if your useless social life means something to someone while you are burning my almost non existent free time that I have to waste in commuting! And YOU are the upset one!? FUCKER! (yeah, I get really an ass for that... because I'm all the fucking time bumping people doing this, and I spend more than 5 hours per day commuting and walking fast, trying not to waste MORE time than necessary. So, yeah, I become pretty a Golden asshole ever. But these assholes never use their brains to walk aside, stand in a corner, close to the wall, and THEN watch their phones.... Noooo, that's too much to ask)

33. most visited website: tumblr, facebook, email accounts.

34. hair colour: Dark brown. I want half of my kind-of-mohawk in red or blue... but never got the time to do ALL that work.... nou.

35. long or short hair: kind-of-Mohawk. More like Banehawk :D

36. do you have a crush on someone: No. I think. I never know if I have crushes anyway.

37. what do you like about yourself: My self-discipline. Hell, that's the only thing that kicks me all the time when I'm getting down and down with my depression. I love it. It’s like a military voice in my head, repeating:  “Are you fuckign depressed? No, not on my sight, get up, go ahead, fucking hell, DO your things, there is not time for softie bullshit, you are not going to stay alive if you don’t move your ass, asshole”. 

38. want any piercings: Maybe?. I don't know if I want one in my lip. Really I don't know. They look awesome in others... in me, I don't know.

39. blood type: 0

40. nicknames: Maco, Mako.

41. relationship status: Single and nostalgic for things that I know I will never have again (I know, it sounds dramatic, but it's true)

42. sign: Taurus

43. pronouns: They, them. Or mixing the binaries.

44. fave tv show: Currently, Shadowhunters.

45. tattoos: None. I want one that follows the arms muscles, but I never found a nice design. Something like Zevran has in his face, but over the arms, playing with the form of muscles.

46. right or left handed: right

47: ever had surgery: No. Soon I will have my surgery for my wisdom tooth :(. Fucking tooth.

48. piercings: Both ears. Fucking society.

49. sport: Martial Arts.

50. vacation: it means days without commuting.

51. trainers: ??? Jeff Cavaliere?. I mean, I watch his videos on youtube, not that he is my trainer..... what the fuck?. Or you mean the shoes?. I like trainers/snickers. I also like these kind of military boots.

— more general

52. eating: A lot. And everything too healthy. Among the non-healthy ones, ice-cream.

53. drinking: Water

54. i’m about to watch: Shadowhunters, tomorrow. Lot of Warlock Lore! :D

55. waiting for: Shadowhunters. In long term, to find a place where to belong (probably it will  never happen). In long-long term: to realise I'm immortal, so I can destroy the capitalism with just my immortality and my evil plan. (hey, dreaming is free)

56. want: to stop my disphoria. This year has been, and keeps being a monster set free in my mind.

57. get married: No. Never. What for? For being cheated on?. No, thank you. haha.

58. career: Physicist. I also would like to be a writer.

— which is better

59. hugs or kisses: uh.... Both.

60. lips or eyes: Eyes

61. shorter or taller: eh?.

62. older or younger: EH? I like to wear old clothings.

63. nice arms or stomach:  …. this is getting gore.

64. hookup or relationships: Relationships.

65. troublemaker or hesitant: Eh?. I'm not getting this part.... what?. Can anyone explain how I should understand this?. Is this about sex? Because... I don't have a clue what a troublemaker sex would be...... and thinking on it makes me develop the weirdest ideas ever....

— have you ever

66. kissed a stranger: No.

67. drank hard liquor: No.

68.turned someone down: Yes. 

69. sex on first date: No.

70: broken someone’s heart: How would I know?. But probably no. I mean, my ex told me I broke her heart, but, hey.... you cheated on me, so, I think that doesn't count.

71. had your heart broken: Deeply. Beyond healing.

72. been arrested: No. But police always looks at me as if they want me to arrest.

73. cried when someone died: Of course.

74. fallen for a friend: Yes.

— do you believe in

75. yourself: Yes.

76. miracles: No.

77. love at first sight: No.

78. santa claus: Pft. No!.

79. angels: hahahha. No. Well, I believein Shadowhunter’s angels (hahaha, I’m totally rotten in this fandom by now....)

— misc

80. eye colour: Brown.

81. best friends name: Not writing them. But I can write 3 names.

82. favourite movie: No, it's not Shadowhunters’. That was a disgrace. I have many favourite movies... but if I reduce the list to my fave film in the last year.... I would say Die Welle: The Wave. German film related to fascist behaviour and ideology. Loved it.

83. favourite actor: I'm going to be super obvious here, and considering I have no idea about actors and actress in general, I will keep myself in my current well-known area: Harry Shum Jr.

84. favourite cartoon: Natsume, Or Hosou, Or so many films of Hayao Miyazaki, or Mushishi.... no, man. I can't choose. Anime has so many wonderful gems.

85. favourite teacher’s name: Carmen

Tagging: Any person who follows me, and read this whole thing is invited to do it, and tagging me back so I can read too. :D

[xmydaysinmilanx]

1 to 75 because why not xd

1. First console you’ve ever owned? PS12. First game you played? Possibly Tekken or Spider-Man for the PS13. Favorite childhood game? I cannot choose one!4. Longest consecutive hours you’ve played a game? I honestly have no idea. Maybe 6 hours approx as I would have dinner and bathroom breaks etc. 5. Game with the best soundtrack? I adore the soundtrack of Final Fantasy X but I think the 13 series was composed beautifully.6. An underrated game from within the last few years? The Jak series. Jak 2 and 3 are excellent games.Think of a hard edged Spyro combined with Grand Theft Auto and you get Jak 2/3. 7. Most disappointing game you’ve played? Final Fantasy 12. The visuals are astounding but I could not take to it at all.8. The game with the best atmosphere/scenery? 7 has a lot of potential in the remake. X has beautiful scenery with plenty of places I’d like to visit in game. I adore Macalania Woods!9. Last game you played? FF XIII. 10. Prefer PC or console? Console, never owned a desktop.11. Have you written any fanfic or made any fanart? Fanfic ‘ideas’ yes but have not branched out into the writing world yet.12. Most bizarre game you’ve ever played? Non strike me as being ‘bizarre.’ There are elements in FF 7 and 13 that are quite strange. Oh and Necron in FF9 - okay.13. Scariest game you’ve played? Abe’s Oddysee freaked me out, must say lol. 14. Do you watch playthroughs online? If I am really stuck on configuring strategy. 15. Favorite animal in a video game? Donald Duck, Kingdom Hearts series.16. The best year in gaming you’ve experienced? The 2001-2006 era. I was younger and so it feels more nostalgic. 17. Have a video game themed background or lockscreen? Of course.18. Worst game you’ve played? I find games such as Call of Duty quite the yawn fest.19. Hardest game you’ve ever played? Lightning Returns on normal mode is pretty challenging due to the time constraints. Also many of the enemies in XIII are tough nuts to crack. Not really sure though.20. Favorite publisher and/or developer? Square-Enix21. If you had to play one game for the rest of your life, what would it be? FF722. If you could turn one game into movie, which would it be? X would be an awesome film. 23. Favorite genre of video game? RPG24. Ever cried because of a video game? Which one(s)? Only one. The ending of XIII. Games do impact me emotionally but I just don’t necessarily cry over them.25. Proudest accomplishment in gaming? Training the golden chocobo in FF7, I managed to win a game of Blitzball (which I hate lol) ONCE by pure chance. Oh and Anima in X. I did pretty well in GTA Vice City come to think of it and I was only 12. 26. How often do you play online? Co-op? Never really played a game online but FF14 ARB intrigues me. 27. Have you gotten any friends into gaming? I do not believe so.28. Who got YOU into gaming? My mum’s boyfriend at the time introduced me to Spyro/Spider-Man games before gifting me X. I’ve been hooked since.29. Watch cutscenes or skip them? Watch unless it’s imperative to progress in the game. I’ll skip if I am re-doing a mission/boss and I can’t  be arsed to watch a scene over again. 30. On average, how long does it take you in the character creation screen? Very little time.31. Game with the best theme song? Kingdom Hearts Simple and Clean is a classic.32. Do you cosplay? I wish but I do not have the confidence.33. Favorite female npc? Maybe Yunalesca. Kinda hard to decide haha.34. Favorite male npc? Maybe Axel from the Kingdom Hearts series.35. Best protagonist? Cloud Strife although, it’s really hard to pick. I also admire Serah Farron and Lightning.36. Best antagonist? Sin/Jecht is pretty ‘up there’ isn’t he? I also love Sephiroth.37. Ever been made fun of for playing video games? Nope, only other things haha.38. Have you tried a game, hated it, then tried again, and loved it? FF XIII really bored me then I tried again a year down the line and have loved it since.39. Do you play for achievements/trophies? Nope.40. Favorite voice actor? David Gallagher (Riku), Adam Croasdell (Ignis), 41. Gone to a midnight release before? Nope.42. A game you will never forget (in a bad OR good way)? FF7.43. Favorite sidekick or companion? Ignis44. Do graphics matter? Nope.45. Do you like funny or more serious games? Elements of comedy and seriousness in one. 46. Always, sometimes, or never use subtitles? They’re always on.47. First person or Third person? Third.48. A game you’ve always wanted to play but have never gotten to it? FF14 A Realm Reborn. Oh, also World of Final Fantasy and some DLC’s for XIII-2.49. A game you haven’t played in forever, but want to replay? 7 but I always hold it off because I want my experience to be magical each time.51. First character you’ve had a crush on? Tidus.52. A game you will always stand behind, and support no matter what? FFXIII and 13-2.53. Your most immersive game? Eh none of note.54. A sequel you really want? FFXV-2 >_> Ignis as lead!55. How much time, on average, do you play in a week? Depends, sometimes none at all sometimes an hour or two 6 days a week lol56. Do you tell people irl that you play video games? Yep57. What is an overrated game you’ve played? FF8/FF9/FIFA/COD58. Ever have someone walk in on a sex scene between you and you LI? Nope59. A game you are looking forward to this year? Not sure if they’re out this year but KH3 and FF7 Remake!60. The game you are best at? Fairly good at X and 7.61. A game you know everything about? FFX/7/13/13-2/KH1/KH262. Would you want to work with video games when you are older? Voice acting lol63. What’s a game that has inspired you? They all have in their own way64. Describe your favorite video game using only three words? Nostalgic, Intriguing, Haunting.65. Any favorite screenshots of games? Check my page haha.66. Game with the yummiest looking food? FFXV - I’VE COME UP WITH A NEW RECIPEEEEHHH!67. Most violent game you’ve played? GTA lmao68. An older game that you’ve just recently gotten into? I’ve already played games over a decade old or more!69. Your first LI? Is it bad I am unsure what these initials stand for?70. Do you play any mobile games? Nah71. A game you can’t stop talking/thinking about at the moment? FFXV72. Have any guilty pleasure games? Not really guilty pleasures lol73. A game with the best fandom? FFXV and KH or sure74. Which game has the best lore? X75. Do you focus on main storyline/quest or do sidequests first?  I do all.

[fey-and-sudden-and-unholy]

Random Survey 1.

1. Do you have a nice yard? If so, do you spend a lot of time outside in it? If not, where do you go when you want to relax outdoors on nice days?

The new house did come with a yard, yes.  I don’t think the previous owners really knew what to do with it, though, as it’s pretty bare.  I’ve got plans for it, this spring, though!  We’re getting rid of the evergreen that had been planted right next to the garage, because that’s a dumb place to put a tree.  We have a huge side yard, so I want to plant a new one, there.  Maybe a cedar.  I dig cedars. I also want to plant lavender in the back yard, and maybe fox gloves, and put a smol gazebo-thing for a place to sit.  The roomies will have to clean it out a bit, though, as it’s currently full of their puppy’s poo, and I don’t fancy kneeling and digging around in it, when the time comes. 

2. Is there a group of friends that you used to hang out with but no longer do? Why don’t you hang out anymore and how do you feel about them now?

Sure, I’m sure everyone does.  There are friends I knew in school, who just faded away after I was no longer in school.  There were friends who proved toxic, who simply no longer exist to me.  There were friends who came with my husband and predictably (and thus painlessly) disappeared the moment he became my ex-husband.  A lot of people in life are temporary.  Most, in fact. 

3. Do your parents enjoy any of the things that you enjoy? Do you bond over these things?

I inherited about half my taste in music from my dad (classic rock, like the Beatles, Led Zeppelin, The Rolling Stones, etc.), so we bond over that.  Any time I discover a video of someone doing something awesome with a guitar, I’ll share it with him, and he was really impressed with 2Cellos.  Things like that.  When I was a kid, I bonded with my mom over hiking. We used to go to state parks and pick a creek and follow it back into the wilderness for hours, come back wet to the knees and muddy and sometimes vaguely hypothermic.  (Fuck ur namby pamby trails, ok?  City Folk...)  We don’t really bond over anything any more, though.  She’s turned too toxic for me to do anything but keep her at a safe distance.

4. Did you ever say or ask something that you assumed was a neutral subject, but the person you were talking to became offended and you had no idea why?

... Honey, you know what site this is, right..?  

5. What is the movie that you have waited the longest for/which film do you remember anticipating the most/are still anticipating?

I waited with bated breath for both Only Lovers Left Alive and Crimson Peak.  I’m really fond of Tom Hiddleston, so when I heard he was gonna a.) star in a vampire movie with Tilda Fucking Swinton, and b.) do a Gothic Romance directed by Guillermo del Toro, I was completely ecstatic on both counts.  I always get a little “oh yay!” moment when I pick up on the actors/directors I like doing something new, but in those instances in particular I was glued to the screen for any news until they came out.

6. Do you have any ideas for a story or movie you’re planning to write or you’d write if you got the time/had the talent? Please share a synopsis!

Oh dear lord...  So far as stories, there are so many, and I feel protective enough of the ones I’m actually working on to not wanna share a lot.  There’s an Epic Steampunk Fantasy I’ve been working on for like ten years (AKA The Goddamn Novel).  Since I’m giving that one a break until the ideas feel fresh again, I’m also working on one involving The Magic of Writing and a girl inheriting an outrageous fortune and being haunted by her awesome great great aunt, and there’s also faeries.  There’s about a thousand interconnected short stories I wanna do modernizing Changeling legends.  There’s a gothic fantasy about a pair of incestuous half-demon half-siblings who usurp their actually-worse father’s kingdom.  There’s... there’s just a lot I wanna do, ok?

If you want movie ideas, let me show you my book shelf, but god help you if you don’t respect the source material, okok.

7. Do you ever feel like anyone is “out of your league” or does that concept not make any sense to you? What do you do when you’re attracted to someone but find them out of your league?

I don’t think leagues exist.  I mean there are people who are Very Not Suited for one another, and sometimes it’s really obvious they’re not, but...   When I’m interested in someone, all I care about is whether the interest’s mutual.  If it is, then yay!  If it’s not, you lick your wounds and move on, or maybe you at least get a shiny new friend of out of it, which is pretty great, too.  You’ve just gotta talk to them and find out.

8. What is something that an interested guy/girl could comment about you, that would make you instantly open to them (e.g., “That book you’re reading is from my favorite author”)?

Instantly open... eeehhhhnnn *vague hand-wiggle*  I think I’ve got too many trust issues for that, really.  But similar tastes/interests/viewpoints is a big plus.  

9. Do you refer to yourself by any sort of fan nickname (Belieber, Little Monster, etc.)?

I’d classify myself as a phan. (Phantom of the Opera fan)  I don’t think any of my other fandoms actually have cutesy names.  Or, if they do I’m not involved enough with the social aspects of it to know.

10. Do you ever just get lazy and give up on your friendships?

When that’s possible, I think it probably shouldn’t actually be classified as a friendship.  Sounds more like an acquaintance, to me.  At which point, yeah.  

11. Is there a person in your life (maybe barely) that you feel in constant competition with (even just in your imagination)? Maybe you feel they are consistently outshining you.

No.  There are people I admire, and consider sort of role models.  But, as twee as it sounds, the only person I’m ever working to outshine is past!me.

12. If you are single, even if you are normally happily single, are there certain specific things you witness that make you wish you were in a relationship (e.g., people getting engaged)?

I am mostly happy single, but I miss having someone to cuddle with sometimes. So, little intimacies, I guess?  Romantic gestures just for their own sake, especially if the person has paid enough attention to their partner for it to be actually personal and not generic.  Or, people having intimate conversations, where they really obviously click and they’re just excited about each other.  I don’t feel jealous of people who get to do these things, but they do make me feel a little lonely.

13. What sort of situations make you feel most self-conscious or inadequate? Are there any people or places that just make you want to crawl into a hole? If you can’t think of anything specific, can you remember the last time (or any time) you felt this way?

Wasn’t our school system designed around creating instances like this...?

14. Out of all your usernames for websites, which one is your favorite? Do you use it for more than one site?

I like the one I have here.  It’s from a Dorothy Parker poem (one of the ones where she isn’t just trying to be flippant and clever, though I like those, too.)  Over on the only other site I really do much on, I go by sister_midnight, because David Bowie is one of those celebrities who I always kind of felt like was a beloved weird uncle I never actually got to meet. Also I like that song.

15. Are there any cities near you that you’re afraid to go to because of the crime rate or its other bad reputations?

I don’t think I’d want to be in parts of Indy after dark.  But honestly there are plenty of rural places and smaller towns around here I’d say that about, too.

16. If you went to camp as a kid, was it a pleasant experience? Do you think that all kids should be able to go to camp? If you didn’t go to camp, do you feel like you kind of missed out on something?

I got hustled off to Bible Camp, once.  I mostly didn’t bother protesting because it was something to do away from home, and my step-mother never respected me not wanting to go to church, so church-camp was the same sort of thing. It was kind of an alien situation, seeing as I hadn’t actually been Christian for about five years, by that point, but I was also used to it.  Plus, sometimes it’s just interesting what you can learn by letting people think what they want and just standing back and... watching them go.  I learned way more about what they were really like by doing that than by reading the Bible, that’s for certain.

17. Do you grandparents ever judge you or stick their heads in your business? If not, is there someone else in your life you dread seeing because of their unwanted input?

I was half raised by my grandparents after my parents divorced and my Dad moved back home, with me in tow.  They were never Catholic enough to do the church thing often, but by god they were Catholic enough to wanna use judgement and shame as a means of trying to browbeat you into who they thought you should be.  According to my father, the judgement started at conception, actually.  I was an accidental pregnancy, you see, and Grandma only stopped abusing him over it after he pointed out that abortion was always an option.

18. Have you ever spent the whole day (or multiple days) just looking up one thing on the internet (e.g., videos of your favorite band, how-to videos, quizzes, etc.)?

I studied faerie lore pretty much non-stop for like five years when I was a teen.

19. Would you ever go on a media fast (i.e., avoiding tv, movies, the internet, and magazines for a certain amount of time, in an attempt to become aware of how media makes you feel)? Do you think that sort of thing would benefit you?

Yeah, and actually I have found it beneficial in the past.  It’s good to take a break and unplug sometimes.

20. Are you happy with where you currently live? If not, what don’t you like about the area and do you plan on leaving?

I love the actual land, where I live.  We have some beautiful countryside, here.  But I don’t like the people, and would love to eventually move someplace more liberal.  I love New England, especially around Boston, and my best friend lives there. (Though I don’t think I’d want to live in the city.)  I’d like to poke at the West Coast, especially around Washington and see how that suits me.  And I adored Ireland, when I visited, so I wouldn’t write that off as an option either.  For now, though, here will do. I’m in a good situation to save up money and plot a permanent escape.

21. If someone told you that we live in a society that hates women, how would you respond?

Seems obvious to me.  Though, I do hold out a certain amount of hope for things to change for the better. We just need to build enough guillotines and put them to good use.

22. When was the last time you were on a boat? Whose boat was it, and what were you doing?

... I honestly can’t remember that last specific time.  o_0  Clearly I should fix this.

23. Have you ever been completely blindsided by a break-up or have you sort of felt all of your relationships deteriorating before they ended? If you would prefer not to answer, what is the last instance you can remember being totally blindsided by news you heard?

No, not really. Generally you can feel things starting to unravel.   

24. Can you remember the last thing you thought and subsequently thought, “wow, I really shouldn’t be thinking that”?

No.  Like Shakespeare said, thought is free.

25. If you ever think about getting married, what are some aspects of the wedding that you would like to see in a non-traditional manner (e.g., a different color dress or “partners” over “husband” and “wife”)?

I don’t do white clothes, wedding dress or otherwise.  As for the rest, if I bothered with a second wedding it would actually be for me, this time, so you can bet it wouldn’t be traditional.  Given that I couldn’t see myself choosing a traditional partner, I don’t imagine they’d mind.