#then he wakes up in a boat with three dudes he doesn't know that are allegedly on their way to save another girl ge doesn't know either

[mike-milkyway]

A One Piece au where everything is the same but Sanji's germa programing worked since the start and little by little the straw hats getting through him.

[paragonrobits]

Talk to the people that fight the monsters in the dark, skulking in the alleys no one remembers and hiding behind suits and smiling faces in the expensive buildings, they'll tell you stories. They say there's a city block that doesn't belong to the city anymore.

Don't make trouble for the people there. The unspoken statement is that the people there aren't... exactly human anymore. They used to be. But there's worse things in the dark then men with the hearts of wolves or undying monsters that drink the blood of the living; worse than patchwork men that spread disaster in their wake and don't understand why. Sometimes, a terrible mystery ensnares someone, trapping them in promises and story and lies, and drags them away.

What comes back isn't human anymore. It's still a person, though. They reason and understand things, same as the humans they were, once. You leave them alone, the local Union rep says. They're no harm to no one, as long as you don't bring trouble to them.

Don't rat to them, you get warned. If someone who looks too good to be true comes around sniffing for their addresses, you just smile and nod and say you never heard a damn thing. Don't rat them out. Because the people in that place will know, and they'll find you, and your family. You try to throw them back into hell, they'll return the favor three times over.

But it goes both ways; if you watch out for them, mind your business and keep their secrets, they'll help you out.

The Union rep tells you a short little story; he says that most of the time, the people in that city block look the same as you or me. There might be a few signs; a girl with teeth unnaturally sharp and pointy, or a man who knocks on wood and it makes a noise like HE'S made of wood. But if things are going normal, you won't see what they really look like, just a kind of magical mask that hides them. But they got their fancy tricks, and they know all about escaping bad situations.

So if you do your part in the deal, they'll help you out. Pretty much anything; a single mother went down to them after some bad business with her ex came up and her kids went missing. Well, she talked to Pop Hammerfist, the big ol' dude that looks like someone carved a tree into a man. Her ex was on the news in the hospital a few days after, yelling about the trees following him, and her kids were back home safe and sound, and with the ex having already signed a few agreements to pay his damn alimony already.

Or a little boy with a missing cat came up to them and asked for help. If any of the real hunters or Union folk had heard about it, they would have stopped him, but the people in the city block didn't turn him away. They nodded, and listened, a few hours later came back with the little boy's cat, safe and purring up a storm. You help them out, they help you out; I hear that kid tells 'em stuff he heard. 'Spose there's a lesson in that. We're all in this together, long as we don't tear the boat down with us in it.

Reminds me of a story about the lady who brought the cat in, in fact. A big lady; has to go to special shops to get clothes that fit. Weird shiny teeth, too, with the weirdest damn braces I ever saw, if those are braces. You hear some funny stories about her, that when she comes knocking the whole floor shakes, but she couldn't be a sweeter lady. Nice to kids, loves cats, always help out. If she's got the weird habit of speaking in rhyme before she says anything else, well, we all got our promises, I guess.

Well, a while back, we had a Slasher. Yeah; the thing that happens when a Hunter goes bad, or someone just gets too much of a taste for murder. Killing opens up a soul, and some part of us leaks out, or something else gets in. This particular fellow liked to call himself a real genius; a real nasty piece of work that liked making elaborate death traps and leaving people to die. Well, we worked out he was there when they started finding the bodies, and by that point he'd already gotten the Big Lady.

...Yeah, that's the name of that lady I mentioned. Long story.

Well, we found what was left of him, and his death traps. The whole place was smashed to pieces by something big. Big and helliciously strong, I'd say. It was like the set of those torture horror movies got hit by a storm. And they found the guy, or. What was left of him. Looked like a wild animal had bit him up, or a jaguar.

Well, from what we heard, he got her all right. But she might have been a bit more than he bargained for. I'm not sure exactly what she did to him, but they were cleaning his blood and bone off the wall for weeks. They said his skull looked like something real strong had just slugged him, so hard he sorta splashed. Don't make me draw you a picture, pal.

But, yeah. Funny thing is, they said the fist mark was so big you'd need a person the size of an elephant to throw that kind of punch. And we kept seeing cats around the area. Really, really big cats.

..You remember about promises. You keep 'em with the city block folk, because they got all kinds of things keeping promises to them.

What happened to the Big Lady, you ask? Oh, she's still around. Helps out the local Union cell now and then. Good hand if you need brute force.

She don't much like having to handle anything that's got too much iron in it; steel is fine, but not real iron. She saws its an allergy.

...Yeah, I know how it sounds. But we got our funny ways, and she keeps her promises, so keep your nose out of it, yeah?

[cbs-scorpion-coffee-shop]

Ok, hear me out:

Kratos, after the events of the Valhalla DLC, is sleeping peacefully in his home, until someone knocks on his door.

"I didn't know who else to go to." says Thor.

Thor, who had ascended to a higher existence after being killed by his father, rejected that existence and decided to live another live. He wanted to be better for his family, but he didn't want to return to them the way he was. He wanted to change first. So he went to the one person who knew how.

Kratos tells Thor about his past and he realizes that if Kratos can change then so can he.

"You kid is lucky." Thor says. "I hope mine can be as lucky as yours one day."

Kratos decides to take him to Valhalla as a start. An opportunity provided to Thor by Odin's betrayal.

Kratos goes to Lunda in the realm between realms and gets a mace and shield for Thor like the ones Modi had. On his way out of the house, Ratatoskr asks Kratos for a favor and says he'll reward him with materials. Kratos asks for another reward instead. For bitter squirrel to be Thor's partner in Valhalla. Kratos believed the similarities between them would make Thor feel at ease.

Kratos, Mimir and Thor, with much conversation between the three on the boat, go to the same shore and after much trouble, convince Freya to help them and not tell anyone. Especially Sif and Thrud.

"Well, at least with Odin gone, there's no one for him to serve. We could make good use of-" Freya says

"No." Kratos cuts her off. "He is Odin's monster no longer, and he will not be ours. To help us or not is your choice."

Freya sighs "I'm only doing it for you, you know."

"Thank you, Freya."

"Of course."

Thor, with bitter as a partner, tackles Valhalla.

Many obstacles stand in his way: The fact that he simply isn't a disciplined warrior, but a fat dude swinging a hammer, and the new weapons are something he isn't used to. The years of trauma inflicted on him by Odin. The death of his mother which he blames himself for. His refusal to embrace the Johtunar part of himself. His refusal to think and feel.

He tries and fails for many months. He lives with Kratos and Mimir and they get to know eachother better. He has Kratos train him, and eventually, with the help of Kratos, Mimir, Tyr, Freya and surprisingly bitter who turned out to be a better companion for Thor than Kratos could ever for, Thor manages to come to terms with his past, and finally battles Tyr and wins.

However, as soon as he peeks at what's behind the door, he quits. He decides that he doesn't wanna try anymore. Everyone else is wondering why, but Kratos knows why. He knows what's behind that door, or rather who.

Modi.

Killing his son. Thor could could never come to terms with that. It took Kratos over a hundred years to heal from that.

He goes to the spot where Modi died to remember his son. He looks above, and he is caught by the last thing he wished to be caught by.

Jormungandur.

He battles it, but due to not having his hammer, and the poison being his weakness, he loses and is knocked unconscious.

He wakes up a bed, wrapped in bandages. It wasn't Kratos's home, or any he'd ever known. The little boy sitting on the edge of the bed greets him. He has red hair darker than his and doesn't look older than three winters. His mother, a dwarf woman, tends to Thor and tells him that her husband saved him and to rest while her husband hunts for food. He tries to decline and just leave, but he can barely walk two steps.

Thor complies, and stays in bed.

He finds out that he is in a magical forest. Those unwanted and shunned by their own people come here to escape. Some dwarves, some giants, some Aseir, Vanir and many others, and that the forest is hidden by her husband's magic, and that he insisted on bringing him here.

Bedridden Thor occasionally talks to the boy and bonds with him. He finds out that the boy has giant blood in him, and works out that his father is a giant or at least has giant blood. No wonder his father never wanted to meet him.

The GiantSlayer he was would strike fear in any giant. He was nowhere near being better. His progress didn't matter to these people. but then why did he save him? That didn't matter as well. As soon as he gets better, he's leaving. It's better this way.

One day, he woke up at sunrise and found that no one was home. He found that he could walk and decided to just leave. He made his way through the forest, but it was a labyrinth. He found himself lost. It must be the father's magic. The excited laughter of the boy playing with his father and mother echoed through the forest. He wanted to thank them and say goodbye to the boy. He followed their voices. The boy was playing hide and seek with his father. It sounded like the boy was the seeker and his father was winning.

The father's voice was familiar. His heart grew heavy as he got closer to the source of the voice.

"It can't be." He whispered to himself.

He reached them, and the sight of the father struck him like a thousand lightning bolts.

Modi.

-Think I should continue this fic?

[criticalrolo]

i INSTANTLY need to know more about cormorant da-ge

im sticking nie mingjue in a house by the river run by two lesbians with their younger siblings so he can make friends with some birds and be wildly overprotective of the kids to his hearts content

anyway here's what's going on to get NMJ sent to the seaside for his health like a jane austen character

JGS is making noises about how much more convenient his life would be if someone would Rid Him Of This Turbulent Sect Leader, Henry II style, and JGY has the idea to try out this cool new composition called the Song of Turmoil

Except he's never tried to kill someone with the Song of Turmoil before, and apparently those songs are powerful enough to kill people within three notes if played by a master! and this is a Modified Version that could conceivably do... Anything

So the first time he decides to try out the song. well. instead of a slow poison he's got a half-dead da-ge spitting blood on the floor 50% of the way into a qi deviation

PANIC. drag his sworn brother to the Koi Tower Basement to see if your half-baked stygian tiger amulet can do anything

the song is still in NMJ's head causing problems so he works out a plan with XY to try to just. erase the song and the memory of that afternoon. see if that does the trick

NMJ wakes up and says what the fuck. where am i. who are you

FUCK SHIT FUCK okay. we're going into crisis mode since we obviously can't send an amnesiac da-ge back to Qinghe when we were SUPPOSED to be doing medical care

Xue Yang go dump this guy in a river to get him as far away from here as possible while JGY does some DAMAGE control to make it look like NMJ left Lanling like expected and possibly disappeared on the way back home

1 terrible trip down the river later, local Yunping fisherman's cormorants find a body in the weeds. he fishes the biggest dude he's ever seen out of the water and OOPS this guy is still alive!! good thing his sister's "very good friend who shares a room with her and is raising a child with her" is the town's doctor!

Cue frantic life saving scene where eventually This Guy wakes up and tells them he doesn't remember anything about himself or his life. oh no he must have fallen off a boat somewhere and hit his head really hard :(

Doesn't even know his own name. He's pretty sure he can remember being called Da-ge by someone though

They'd feel bad if they just set this guy wandering off with literally Nothing to go on in the world. plus he can reach the top shelves in their house without having to get a chair

He can stay with them if he helps with the farm animals, learns how to fish, and helps out the family business. And even though his meridians are all fucked up he's got a little bit of cultivation ability so he can help their daughter build up her golden core. He's pretty good at this training thing!

They've got nine cormorants named after the Nine Sons of the Dragon. Baxia the cormorant is fucking obsessed with Da-ge for whatever reason

Domestic life continues with Da-ge out on a boat during the day and helping the cultivators out with developing their golden cores, training they normally wouldn't really have access to

One day the doctor says her cousin is coming to visit! she hasn't seen her since the end of the Sunshot campaign and she's excited to reconnect with her. oh look here she comes!! hi luo quinyang it's been forever since we've seen you!!

POV: you are Mianmian, you left the cultivation world a year ago and you're traveling around as a rogue cultivator now. You visit your cousin. Fucking Chifeng-Zun is in her front yard. He's been presumed dead for the last year. what the actual fuck do you do

meanwhile JGY is desperately trying to convince NHS back in Qinghe to accept that his brother is dead for his own sake <3 for his own closure so he can lead the sect in his brother's memory <3 please god stop looking into this <3

NHS: "haha yeah you're probably right sang-ge. anyway im going to go look into all of our historical records to see how i can get access to Dead People's Spirits to Find Their Bodies and maybe this will lead to me bringing my dead necromancer friend back from the dead. xoxo"

anyway eventually they reunite and it's a whole debacle. this is actually a v long way for me to make NMJ and mianmian accidental friends because I think it would be funny

[joylinda-hawks]

That ballad again. Jianghu has only been at peace for a few years, but the Five Lakes Alliance wants to regain power and unfairly dominate Jianghu. WOH, episode 2, part 3. ZZS walks the streets of Yue. While crossing another bridge, he hears a rhyme song sung by children. The children sing that you will be there. he chased me and I will chase you, there is a legend in Jianghu. The water of the Five Lakes accumulates all over the world, and they still deserve to dominate Jianghu. ZZS listens to a rhyme song and the children run ahead laughing. ZZS says in his mind that this ballad has appeared again. He adds that there has been peace in Jianghu for several years, and the Five Lakes Alliance wants to regain power. ZZS claims that they do not deserve it and a disaster will occur. ZZS is approaching the place where the boat of one of the carriers is moored. The elderly man is sleeping. ZZS wakes him up by knocking off his hat. The carrier asks who is there again, calls ZZS a mean child and asks what he is doing. He accuses ZZS of not seeing that he is sleeping. ZZS behaves as if it did not hear what the carrier said. He asks if he's free and if he could give him a ride. The carrier says yes. And ZZS declares that he wants to go to the Mirror Lake Manor. The ferryman demands three pieces of silver and asks if ZZZ wants to sail. ZZS agrees. The surprised carrier gets up, calls ZZS an idiot and claims that for this price he could travel twenty times. ZZS responds that the carrier quoted the price and he agreed to it. So they came to an agreement and it is not in the carrier's interest for ZZS to be a fool. The carrier claims that ZZS is crazy because he looks like he is dying, and asks ZZS if he has bad intentions and wants to cheat him. He tells ZZS to leave because he won't give him a ride anywhere. The carrier lies backwards on the place where he was lying. Finally, he tells ZZS to disappear. A voice is heard from the other end of the channel, it's WKX, who claims that if it were intended for them, ZZS would not have been rejected. WKX asks why ZZS forces the carrier to give a ride if he is not asked for it. If ZZS doesn't mind, it can sail with WKX. ZZS sees a luxury boat in the distance. The surprised carrier gets up and asks WKX what he is doing, calling him a buffoon and asking what he is planning, because he wants to steal his customer. The carrier claims that WKX does not know the "first come, first served" principle and recommends that ZZS come on board. Surprised, ZZS asks if he can come in and when he is sure that he can, he gets into the boat. ZZS tells WKX see you later and says that if fate allows, they will meet again. The carrier tells ZZS to hurry up. WKX bows and tells ZZS not to worry about his journey, because one day WKX will finally welcome him. As ZZS leaves, GX asks WKX who exactly this Sick Dude is. WKX responds that the person who is looking. ZZS doesn't know yet that he's the one who aroused the strange man's interest, so after thinking about it, he calmly thinks that spending time in the ZCL sect would be a good choice. He thinks he'll get a meal and a place to sleep there before you continue your journey. ZZS doesn't even think about the rhyme for long, but his conversation with the carrier is interesting. ZZS has money for the journey, so it agrees to the given amount without hesitation, and the carrier only agrees when WKX submits proposals. ZZS responding to WKX does not know that he is giving him an invitation to the split for ZZS. ZZH is extremely charming here as the hobo ZZS, and GJ does everything to arouse the other man's interest.

[starryqueen-18]

The Little Siren Sister (Parody of The Little Mermaid)

here's another of my fairytale paper Mario parodies I wrote long ago on amino, enjoy! (Slight Warning, this following story may probably contain unsettling themes, please read at your own risk)

Once Upon a land of magic and darkness, long live three witches, that's right THREE witches, one of them was named Vivian,

Vivian: hello.

The Second one is a small and old one is Beldam,

Beldam: Greetings- HEY I'M NOT OLD

dude, you look like the other mother from coraline, except, she is Taller, but she have a long nose but not that long.

Beldam: *grumbles*

And finally, the third one is the Wario wannabe, Marilyn.

Marilyn: ....who's Wario?

Anyways, Vivian, who used to be like her sisters but now had a different sight, one day, Vivian went out of her world to spy on a man, a plum shaped plumber named Mario, who was hanging out with his brother, a thinny green plumber named Luigi.

Mario: HEY I HEARD THAT!!! AND I'M NOT FAT I'M JUST BIG BONE!!!!!

Luigi: *snickers*

Mario: I HEARD THAT!!!!!!!!

hehe, so mario, luigi and their friends, are having a party on....A CRUISE SHIP! there was music pumping, feasts of food being eaten, jacuzzi's bubbling and all the ladies.

Koopa: LADIES *swoops in between the girls and speaks in a handsome voice*  heya, you ladies, wanna have a drink?

Ladies: *slaps Koopa*

I feel bad for Koopa... not! haha! 

Vivian: *gazes at the cruise ship* man, I wish I can go to the cruise ship, but my sister refuse to let me *sighs*

but as she was about to have a dream sequence, a horrid storm swallowed the sea in darkness, the boat was waving back and forth as the waves started to rock around.

Olivia: AAAAHHHHHHH

Luigi: EVERYONE HANG ON!!!

Goomba: ugh, why did even have to eat the egg salad with mayonaise? *pukes on the ocean*

Mario: MAMA MIA!

Peach: *gasp* MARIO!

Luigi: Brother! hang on!!!!

Mario: *slips and fells off the boat*

Vivian: *gasps* oh no!

So Vivian rushed out to save the fat plumber who is struggling to swim due to the fatness-

Mario: HEY! I'M NOT FA- *sinking*

Vivian: *gasps* Mario! *dives in*

Vivian kept swimming and swimming deep until finally...she saved him.. and reached for the beach.

Vivian: *lays him on the sand* ...is he ok?

*shrugs*

Vivian: ...wow, it's him, it's actually him, I can't believe it.

Mario: .........

Vivian: hmm.

I wonder if the man has any coins in his pockets.

Vivian: what?

you never know, I mean he might be a millionare.

Mario: *coughs*

Vivian: he's awake.

Mario: *wakes up* ?

Vivian: .....hi

Luigi and peach: Mario!

Vivian: uh crud *retreats back*\

Luigi: brother, are you ok?

Mario: yeah, I think so.

AH DANG IT!!! you guys just ruined the moment!

Mario: what moment?

nevermind, so Vivian went back to her world with the siren sisters.

Beldam: *looking at the mirror* hmmm

Marilyn: you been looking at that mirror for hours.

Beldam: Marilyn, I don't look...old, am I?

Marilyn: ...uh...well?

Vivian: *comes in* hey guys-

Beldam: VIVIAN! WHERE WERE YOU I'VE BEEN CALLING YOU ON YOUR PHONE EVERY SINCE!!

Vivian: .wait..we have cell phones?

Beldam: well, yeah didn't you know?

Marilyn: we have these weird cell phones appeared unexpectedly in our pockets

Vivian: we don't have cell phones.

Beldam: doesn't matter, I got a question.

Vivian: what is it?

Beldam: ...........Am I Old?

VIvian: um.....

tell the truth Vivian, you know it's obvious.

Beldam: well?

Vivian: uh....

Marilyn: *doing sign language saying, no don't say it, it'll end bad*

Vivian: uh...yes?

Marilyn: *facepalms*

*makes some cricket noises*

Beldam: ....*instant crying* AAHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

geez did that really hit ya?

Beldam: OH THE HUMANITY!!!!! I'M GROWING OLD!!

Vivian: uh, Beldam, do you think it's ok if I can-

Beldam: NO! NO WAY ARE YOU GOING TO THE HUMAN WORLD!! 

Vivian: but they aren't that bad.

Beldam: I was gonna let you go but you insulted me!

by saying you're old?

Beldam: MIND YOUR OWN BUSINESS NARRATOR LADY!!!

uh, this is my business, I'm the narrator!

Beldam: WHAT EVER, VIVIAN I FORBID YOU FROM GOING WITH MARIO!

what the heck, she just met him

Beldam: DON'T CARE, NOW IF YOU EXCUSE ME, I'LL BE IN MY ROOM CRYING THROUGH MY LIFE!

because you're old?

Beldam: Oh be *back crack* AH my back!

HA see you are getting old!

Beldam: *growls and goes to her room*

Marilyn: *sighs* sorry Vi. *goes to her room*

Vivian: *sighs and leaves* aw man, I really wanna see that plumber again, but how? I would do anything for a miracle! Anything!

but just then, as she said that, some thunder and light started to spazz around, either the weather man reported a thunder storm on a wednesdays or...it's the calling, the eerie sinister calling of-

Dimentio: ME!!!!!!!

Dooplis: *also here* and me, AH WHY DO I HAVE TO BE AN EEL! CAN'T I JUST BE LIKE A PARTNER OR SOMETHING?!

you are the partner, it's just that the partner's the eel.

Dooplis: wha? I don't understand the point of thi-

MOVING ON!

Dimentio: did I heard you say, you want to visit the world of the hero Mario?

Vivian: uh...yeah? do you know how?

Dimentio: well of course I do, I am Dimentio, the master of magic, master of solutions and master of DISTRUC- *que disk scratch* uh, I mean Dreams, Come with me! *uses teleport magic to le teleporte outta here*

And so they arrived! at their lair, of brilliance and excellent magic!

*The place looks like it was trashed*

Dooplis: welcome to our humble lair

Vivian: huh looks like this place has been bankrupt.

well... I had to pay the bail for the origami twins.

Vivian: what?

yeah, you see Olly was littering confetti to make a trail home, epic fail. so now, we don't have any coins left to afford an epic n cool sea witch lair.

Vivian: oh, wait, I heard Bowser's in jail.

oh yeah, uh..it's a long story, *ahem* moving on!

Dimentio: So, you want to see Mario yes?

Vivian: uh, yeah?

Dimentio: well fear not, for I have just the thing! *goes to an old chest thing and founds the ingreadients, he then goes to an old cooking pot*

So Dimentio get the ingredients ready, turned on the cook pot and place the ingredients in, the flames hissed as the water plops out of the pot, gushing out like a knock off version of a volcano. Thunder Parks on the very room! *makes thunder noises*

Vivian: seriously?

I couldn't afford sound effects.

Dimentio: *finishes the spell* and done, it is finished!

Vivian: perfect!

Dimentio: but you need to give me something in return.

Vivian: and that is...

Dimentio: your voice.

Vivian: my voice? how am I suppose to talk to mario with no voice?

Dooplis: Come on kid, you have your looks the pretty....uh...mouth? sorry I literally can't tell if your hat burried in your eyes.

Vivian: it's fine.

Dimentio: alright enough talk, let's get this scene over with. *pulls out his cell phone* Ok kid, all you have to do is sing while I record your voice.

Vivian: .....I was hoping some sort of magic stuff like in that one movie.

Dimentio: yeah but we really don't have the budget for the magic effects neither the music stuff so we have to deal with that for now.

Vivian: I don't know about this

Dooplis: Ugh just hurry up and sing already!!!

Yeah! I got a cute cookie run fanfiction to read!!!

Vivian: *sighs* fine, but what should I sing?

DImentio: I don't know any song!

Sing My Lullaby from Lion King 2!

Dimentio, Dooplis and Vivian: NO!

Aw :(

Dooplis: just sing random notes

Vivian: ok...*sings a song*

Dimentio: *records*

Dooplis: *checking youtube*

Dimentio: and done!

Vivian: oh cool, hold on, aren't I not suppose to talk?

Dimentio: uh, hello budget problems! but fear not, we shall do a bet, if you can go through a day without a single word....I will let you go on free with mario along with that paper mario origami king game, you were on about.

Vivian: SWEET!

Dimentio: but If you talk or sing....you'll belong to me...FOREVER!!! and 100 bucks.

Vivian: Deal!

So after the bet was sealed Vivian took the spell that was cast by Dimentio, I wish there's gonna be some anime transformation scene going on but, there's budget soo let's just skip that where she have became a human and went to the mushroom kingdom.

Vivian: .... *sees Mario*

Mario: ? *sees Vivian* Oh hello there, what's your name?

Vivian: *was about to speak but then realized she can't speak because of the bet, so she have to write her name on the ground*

Mario: oh, Vivian, nice to meet you Vivian.

Vivian: *smiles*

Mario: so wanna hang out?

Vivian: *nods*

the two hold hands and walked off to the kingdom town.

*Meanwhile*

Marilyn: ugh will come out of there Beldam, you've been locked in there for hours, I really need to use the toilet.

Beldam: SILENCE! 

Marilyn: dude it's age you can't stop age from going forward! *sighs*

Beldam: *comes out wearing makeup*

AH GEEZ! 

Dimentio and Dooplis: hey guys- *sees Beldam and started to scream* 

Beldam: >:(

Marilyn: what are you guys doing here anyway?

Dimentio: oh we're here to tell you......that there's a sweet new update on cookie run kingdom!

Marilyn; wow, really?!

Beldam: that's amazing!!

Dimentio: yeah..Oh and Vivian went off to the mushroom kingdom, after I gave her the human spell.

Beldam and Marylin: WHAT?!

Beldam: THERE'S A POTION THAT CAN MAKE YOU BEAUTIFUL?! GRR THAT'S IT VIVIAN IS SO IN TROUBLE!!!!!!!! FOR INSULTING ME AND CALLING ME OLD!

Marylin: uh what about the mario part?

Beldam: eh Mario is no big deal I got my life he's got his, NOW LET'S GOT FIND VIVIAN!!!!!!!!!! after a game of cookie run kingdom

*the peeps agreed and play on their cell phones*

meanwhile, well since it's just romance and it's gonna take forever and wanna finish this story real quick, I'm gonna just skip to night where they were dancing.

Vivian: >w<

Mario; Vivian, listen I know it's been very long time, but I wanna ask you something....*pulls out a friendship ring* will you be my bff forever?

Vivian:..........................OMG YES YES!!!!!

*Me making thunder sounds*

Mario: huh?

sorry budget problems.

Dimentio: haha! you lost the bet!

Mario; bet? what bet?

Dimentio: Vivian was not suppose to speak for the whole day or else she belongs to me, and she now owe me bucks! ROBUX!

Vivian: back off man, those are my robux!!!!

Dimentio: *grabs Vivian* SWIPE! SEEYA! *about to swim off with her but was suddenly went roblox oofed by Beldam and Marilyn* wha the?!

Vivian: I'm saved!

Beldam: you are in big trouble, missy, 

Vivian: I can explain-

Beldam: HOW DARE YOU USE THE HUMAN POTION AND DIDN'T SHARE ME SOME?!

Vivian: huh?

Beldam: I wasn't really mad that you for seeing mario, I'm just mad because you didn't share me the potion and called me old,

which you are.

Beldam: HUSH NARRATOR LADY!!!! anyways, have fun Vivian, I'ma go knit some scarfs and play some cookie run kingdom.

Marylin: eh, I'm gone too see ya *follows Beldam*

welp, that went sorta well, I'm just gonna finish off here, and so Mario and Vivian are officially BFFS Best Friend Forever and they all live Happily Ever After.

The End......until next Fairytale!

Don't be Downie! Stay Kawaiii!!!!! >w<

bye <3

[blight-flower]

Need help with a story title

So basically, I'm making a fic where Wind gets yeeted off a ship during a storm and dreams about beloved figures in the Chain's lives. Especially a certain blue ball of light.

But when he wakes up, he doesn't remember who he is, where he is and why the hell his right eye and arm are corrupted. He ends up in Wild's Hyrule (Post ToTK) and the Champion offers to help him. Yada yada story details and stuff and they somehow meet all the figures in Wind's dream. That's all I got. Oh btw main villain is Ghirahim... For some reason. Idk I just thought about it but it might be plot relevant later.

Here's the writing I've gotten down so far:

Thunder raged on as I tried my best to raise the mainsail. The goddess damned thing got jammed because a certain Four didn’t oil the halyard properly. Two years may not seem a lot to you, but to me? And the adventures I’ve gotten because of a red boat and an indomitable will? 

That earned me all the sailing experience that the seven seas has to offer. And this storm was not normal. Not only was this the strongest I have ever encountered, but the amount of monsters we’ve spotted in the past few hours alone just puts the fish in the can for me. 

“Legend! Can you get me the oil from the storage below deck!? There should be-” Blegh, a gulp of salt water in my mouth. “There should be loads of oil from the previous crew!” 

Legend, the sarcastic adventuring veteran, can only reply with more questions as he desperately tries to bail all the water from the deck. “Why do you need it sailor!? ‘Rule, Four and I are clearly busy here!”

“Exactly my point! If I could do the job tiny failed to do, then maybe I could hoist the sail and play Wind’s Requiem to get us out of this place!” 

The veteran nods and immediately drops his bucket. Meanwhile leaving a confused Hyrule and Four, two of the shortest members in a group of nine, to double the muscle and work even harder. 

I got a clear view of the monster filled sea before me. If only this was my Hyrule, I would’ve killed those monsters lickety split, but the weather and the old man won’t let me out of this ship unless my goal was to drown. Especially since his wife and newborn were onboard. 

No way in hell would he let anyone die in front of them. I struggled to unjam the rusty halyard as the bailing efforts proved to be for nothing. Sky and my best friend Wars were busy helping him fix any possible leaks below and Twilight… He’s just not in good shape right now. 

*CRASH* A huge wave clashed against the starboard hull, flinging anything that isn’t bolted or permanently attached to the deck. Which unfortunately included me. Sweet Hylia I feel like I’m flying! But not in a good way. 

Seeing my helpless body being tossed into the ocean, Hyrule, the golden heart guy he is, ditches his bucket and immediately rushes over and grabs my hand at the cost of fumbling into the ocean as well. I love you ‘Rule but at least try to think before you act in dangerous situations.

Luckily, Four is able to grab him in turn. His short height won’t do him any good though. “Guys, help! Wind and Hyrule are gonna get thrown overboard! I can’t hold on much longer!” 

On que, a line of similar looking blonde dudes came rushing out. It’s always helpful to have a couple of guys who share your real name as allies. Wars was the first to tug on the smith’s body, but even he was having a hard time. Sky and Legend followed suit. 

Only two of us weren’t here, or three if you count the Champion. He’s been gone for a year now. Not that we can do anything about it. Flora needed his help, of course we can’t object to any business in Wild’s Hyrule. But still… I miss him. His cooking especially, I don’t even know how we survived this long without getting food poisoning. 

“Sweet goddesses, his hand is slipping!” Oh no. I turned to see that my hand is really slipping from Rule’s. I tried to tighten my grasp but it’s no use. Another huge wave came crashing on the other side of the ship, launching me upwards and sementing my fate.

I lose Hyrule’s hand and begin to fall into the sea. So this is it huh? The last thing I will ever see are storm clouds and the worried faces of those who I call my family. And the last thing they will see of me… Desperately reaching out my hand in the hopes that someone will save me. 

Yet another to add to their long list of losses. That much I know. It’s weird but I feel a smile creeping up my face as I vanish beneath the waves. 

“NO!” Wars’ cry is the last thing I hear before everything… goes… black… 

How long has it been since I last woke up? Was it hours? Days? Or maybe even weeks? One thing is for certain though, I’m not where I used to be. This place feels ethereal, glowing. Is it a temple of sorts? Doesn’t look like any of the ones I’ve been to at least. 

A couple of stone archways dotted around the place all willy-nilly, as if the builders forgot to consult a blueprint or whatever. The ground below me doesn’t look like ground at all. It looks like glass with a bunch of weird glowing swirls and tear shaped markings.

[ms-demeanor]

Your Mother-in-law is wiser than you know.

Fiat currencies come and go, but gold and silver stay valuable.

If some catastrophe happens, and you and your family wake up to realise that you've all been transported to ancient Babylon, or the Persian Empire, or the Roman Republic, or Medieval England, or Ming Dynasty China, your credit cards and your bitcoin and your bank notes with Illuminati symbols on them will be useless.

Gold and silver? Melt them down and sell them, you'll immediately be able to trade with the locals.

It's a smoky day in the postapocalypse. The fires never really stop, but there were a lot of masks thrown away during the pandemic, so most people have gotten used to raking through landfills and sanitizing their finds in the weak red sunlight. But breathing smoke through three layers of paper is draining and so is clearing the toxic soot off your skin when you make it back inside a filtered building.

It's hard to get by - it's Southern California, after all, and it was never meant to support a population this size. The water-deaths that happened in the first three months weren't enough to relieve the barely-functional grid, and power has been down for two years. There's nobody left to clear the cars that ran out of gas on the way out of town, so the only way to leave is on foot, and then where would you go? Nevada and Arizona don't have water either, the 5 is a warzone, and it's a long, long way to Oregon and you might get killed at the border if you make it that far.

Sometimes you dream about taking your bike down to the beach and finding a sailboat bobbing in the surf. You dream that you know how to sail. You dream that you brought enough food for the journey North when you took a day trip to collect clams in the surf. You dream that your friends are with you, and that you push the boat into the waves and make it all the way to Washington with good weather and clear skies and nobody else you love dying.

But you're not at the beach, and there is no boat, and you can't sail anyway. It's a smoky day in the postapocalypse and you've got a cut on your leg that has turned a worrying color.

The Goldline Station closest to your house has become a kind of weekend market. It's hard to walk along the freeways, and dangerous, but the train tracks are pretty clear. If you're lucky, sometimes you can even get on a hand car and ride for a while if what you need isn't at the local station. But you know the drugstore guy is always in the same shaded parking space by the dry fountain.

Drugstore Guy used to work at a drugstore. He figured out what was going on before anyone else at his store did, and filled his truck with everything that would fit, grateful that he'd brought his truck with the camper shell instead of his wife's Prius. He managed to grab enough stock that lots of people around here survived things that people two towns over didn't. He even grabbed the stock of vaccines, and has managed to amass enough in trade that he's still got a refrigerator with full vials. You don't want to know what a TDaP shot costs these days, and are grateful that you had a tetanus shot a month before everything went to shit.

The parking spot never has a lot of customers around it because Drugstore Guy doesn't need volume. What the parking spot DOES always have is three huge dudes with very big guns chatting with their boss, sitting around a big cooler in beat-up beach chairs.

All of them perk up as you ride over. The huge dudes are very still and very hostile, but Drugstore Guy is smiling at you, his eyes crinkled above is brand-new, never-used masks. You hop off your bike and lay it down behind you, the missing kickstand is an embarrassing liability with these men watching you.

"Hey," you say quietly, walking closer. "You got a Z-pak?"

"Sure," says Drugstore Guy. "But I don't think you can afford it. How about some penicillin?"

You shrug. "Allergic."

Drugstore guy nods. "That's rough. I've got penicillin like candy. I don't have many Z-paks."

You shift nervously from foot to foot. The wound on your leg throbs, reminding you of how far an angry red color had spread around it when you put a bandage on it before coming here.

"Z-paks don't last forever," you say. "You got any that are expired? I think I've got enough for that."

He laughs. "They're all expired. I still think you can't afford it." He looks behind you. "People who can buy my stuff don't ride broken bikes."

You shrug again. "It's not broken, I just didn't want to trade for another. Maybe I'm a little lazy, but I'm not cheap."

"Alright," Drugstore Guy says. "What've you got."

You take your backpack off slowly. You know the big guys have seen the revolver you've got holstered against your ribs, but everybody at the market has a gun. You're not worried about them seeing it, you don't want them to think you're going for it. You dig into the pocket that was resting against your sweaty shirt, the safest place to keep anything valuable you're carrying. The plastic container you come up with is about the size of a playing card, and the silver dollar inside of it flashes in the sun. You pass it over for Drugstore Guy to examine.

The look he gives you, with what you can see of his face, can only be described as pitying. "I don't know if you know this, kiddo," he says, "but US Legal Tender really doesn't mean much these days."

You shake your head. The fact that it's a dollar isn't important. "It's silver. It's real. One ounce of silver, more than 99 percent pure."

Drugstore guy looks at the coin in his hand and back to you, and back to the coin. "Even if it is 99 percent pure," he says, "which you can't prove, what the fuck am I supposed to do with silver?"

It's hot and smoky and your leg is burning and his question throws you for a loop.

"It's silver," you say. "You know. Silver."

"Buddy, I can't eat silver," Drugstore guy says. "And neither can anybody else around here. Who would I even spend this with?"

You're sweating, and your head hurts. "I've got gold too," you say. You hadn't planned on blurting it out like that. You didn't want to use it, and had hoped the price wouldn't get that high. "Real gold. 24 karat. A half-ounce bar. It was worth two thousand dollars before."

"Yeah?" Drugstore guy says, "And what's it worth now?"

You laugh, weakly. "A Z-pak, I hope."

"Nope," he says, and holds the silver dollar out for you to take. "What else you got?"

You're swaying a little. You don't take the coin back. "I - I've got some platinum and palladium, but you'd have to meet me-" you stammer.

Drugstore guy is looking at you like he's worried now. Like maybe whatever you've got is catching. "Do I look like I've got a use for platinum or palladium? Do I look like I need to make a bunch of high-end electronics today?"

"It - it's a store of value," you answer. "Precious metals have been used in ancient Babylon and Persia and the Roman republic and in Medieval England and Ming Dynasty China. It's - it's gold."

One of the big guys leans forward on his elbows, looking at you over his sunglasses. He looks a little more sympathetic than is boss does right now. "Do you have any eggs?"

"What?" You say. This whole excursion is beginning to feel more and more surreal.

"Jay's right," Drugstore guy says. "I could let a Z-pak go for two dozen eggs. "Or how about bullets? What caliber is your little pea-shooter there?"

"It's a .38," you say, "I don't - I don't have any eggs. Or bullets to spare." God knows that's true, you've got what's in the gun and you haven't even seen an egg in a year.

"Iodine? Bleach?" Another guard says. "How about hand-sewing needles? Or beeswax?"

"Coffee," you say, out of nowhere. You have four cans in an insulated bin in your garage. "I've got a can of French roast. Still sealed."

"Well now," Drugstore Guy sits back in his chair, cheerful again. "That is worth a Z-Pak. Is it on you?"

Drugstore guy agrees to give you half the first dose from the Z-Pak and to hold onto the silver dollar as collateral while you ride home to get the coffee and bring it back to the market.

You're feeling pretty worn out by the time you make the trade. Drugstore guy passes you the cardboard packet of antibiotics and the dollar coin at the same time.

"Are you all on your own, kid?"

"Maybe," you say, defensive. "Why?"

"Because in spite of the mercenary nature of this exchange I am actually concerned about the well-being of my community and someone who shows up to trade with gold when they've got coffee seems like someone who could use a little help. We have a cookout on Sundays - it's bring what you can, eat if you can't - and there's a few people who meet up at the library on Wednesdays to do a skills exchange. If you've made it this long surely you've got some skills that got you here, and clearly you could stand to learn a few more."

Your mouth drops open behind your mask and all that you can think to say is "How does anyone know what day it is anymore?"

Drugstore Guy beams at you, and hands you a flier. It's not printed, but stamped. There's a map to a park and a promise of free, clean water to all who attend. "You ask. Today's Sunday. Dinner's at six."

~~~~~~~~~~~

All of which is to say, Human Pet Guy, that there is very little you could do that would endear you to me *less* than tell me that I should listen more to my mother in law, who thinks that bigfoot is going to steal her grandchildren, about apocalypse survival scenarios. It is also to say that if you think that a silver dollar is going to be worth much more than a bitcoin in an actual survival situation you are Significantly More Wrong Than You Think.

The thing that metal hoarders don't understand is that while, yes, fiat currency is an arbitrary agreement to exchange paper at an artificially set value *so is the use of metal as a tool of exchange.* The amount that a silver penny was worth in medieval England was arbitrarily set because the *intrinsic* value of precious metals is pretty far removed from most people's daily lives so sometimes a piece of silver is going to be worth a lot less to someone than the twelve loaves of bread that the king had decreed *AND* because in all of the examples you listed counterfeiting was a huge problem in SPITE of being in a relatively high-trust situation, by which I mean that in situations where you have a well-formed society of people who trust one another and a rule of law and courts where people could redress wrongs you STILL had problems trusting the purity of the precious metals you were offered as currency and that isn't something that gets any better when you're dealing with people who are fighting over who gets to be the Ayatollah of Rock and Rolla.

So yeah this may be an issue of me out-crazying you because I'm not coming at this from a perspective of "fiat currency is good" I'm coming at this from a perspective of "precious metals are actually pretty worthless as a survival strategy if you're anticipating a society in which people will shoot you to take your diesel so start a compost pile, learn how to mend clothes, keep chickens, grow vegetables, and load ammo if that's the society you're worried about."

[poemmynerdicous]

"16 WAYS ON HOW TO KEEP A MAN"

So you feel like you found the one; he sends butterflies and dragons in your stomach whenever he's around. He calls you beautiful every single second. But for how long? Will you be able to keep him that way? Yes sister, above all reasons, you are responsible, to make him stay. How to? Here are 16 proven and tested ways on HOW TO KEEP A MAN:

1.MAKE SURE YOU HAVE A MAN TO KEEP.

What I mean by this is that make sure you are keeping a "MAN"; someone who's matured enough to have a life-long commitment with you and not just a "BOY" who will have tantrums as much as you also have yours too. So girl, find a man that you'll share your toothpaste in the morning, will dine with you in mid-day, watch movies with you in the night and make wishes with you at 11:11; not someone who's just willing to share bedsheets and bed with you  (y'all know what I mean).

2. MAKE SURE HE'S WILLING TO STAY IN THE FIRST PLACE. Ironic isn't it? As much as the title of this article is concerned, these ways is to help you keep a man. But honey, the old saying goes like this "You can never keep someone who doesn't want to be kept." Make sure that he is very much sincere and inlove with you to make these things work. If this step is not applicable nor not the case with your man, then proceed to number three.

3. ASK HIS ACTIONS IF HE WANTS TO BE KEPT OR WILLING TO BE KEPT THROUGHOUT THE PROCESS.

Finding a man who'll stay is a diamond in the rough nowadays. There are even situations that you can't even have just one, even just one man to consider your own or be your "make-believe" right man because instances, looks and money won't allow you to have one. LMAO. So girl, make sure that if you have a man that you want to spend your life with, his actions says that he wants to be kept or even if he doesn't want to, for the time being, he'll eventually want to stay and see your drooling face in the morning when you wake up as husband and wife one day. Actions speaks louder than words dear. Besides, no toothbrush nor mouthwash will ever prevent a man's lips from lying so better yet make him prove it through actions and sincere efforts.

4. KNOW WHAT HE LIKES AND WHAT HE DOESN'T : A MUST.

It's has always been one of the first step in a long term relationships, may it be friendly or romantic type of relationship. Knowing what he likes and what he doesn't, assure you that you will never go wrong in you choices and actions when it comes to the man of your life. The food he likes, the colors he prefer, the perfume he uses, and even the music he likes. By then, you'll be able to choose easily what to give him in special days and occasions or whenever you feel like giving something that he'll surely like.

4. COOK HIM GOOD FOOD.

Yeah, I know... I know this sounds cliche but hey, it always works sis. The best way to a man's heart is through his stomach. If a woman cooks good food, she will not only make her man stay, but will morelike to win the hearts of the family of his partner too.

5. COMPLIMENT HIS EFFORTS AND PHYSICAL APPEARANCE.

It isn't only us girls who wants to be complimented and to be told we are beautiful; men also want to hear from us about what we think about how they look, how his work and efforts are appreciated and how much you like him near you. Simple words like, "I like your shirt", "You smell good", or even "Thank you, Handsome" will definitely melt the macho man inside him.

6. SPEND QUALITY TIME WITH HIM.

It's always given that time is bound to be one of the most important components of long lasting relationships. In men's perspective, they are more likely to stay with a woman who knows how to value time and balance it with work, personal life and of course, time for him. Go out on a date with him, watch movies with him, and do things the two of you enjoys the most.

7. NEVER EVER MAKE YOUR MAN JEALOUS.

For women, we are entitled to be too paranoid at times, thinking that every single girls around our Babe is a threat. But honey, jealousy is different in men. When they're jealous, they tend to keep it as much as they could for the sake of they're manliness. If he says never go out with men he doesn't like the vibes of or men who acts weird around you, just listen to him and do it. So always be observant towards his actions so you'll be able to know if he being a "jelly-oh-jealous" baby. Well, he's a man too. He knows when another man has different intentions because he's been there too; before your relationship ever existed.

8. GIVE HIM TOKENS OF LOVE AND GIFTS SPECIALLY IN SPECIAL OCCASIONS.

Men are definitely not showy most of the time. He will never tell you that he likes the shirt you two ran across the department store nor tell you he wants a birthday present on his birthday. But believe me, he's the happiest when you give him gifts or simple tokens of love. It makes him feel loved and important. I mean, after all his efforts and love, he deserves presents too.

9. KNOW THE BOUNDARIES OF BEING A "GIRLFRIEND" AND A "MOTHER".

Darling, believe me when I say that men feels irritated when their woman act like a "Nagging Mom". You can't go nag all day like a cringey mom that nags at his son 24/7(well that's what most mom's do. LOL). He already have a mom, what he needs is a loving girlfriend.

10. BE NOT TOO TIGHT NOR TOO LOOSE.

What were you thinking when you read this one? Well, whatever may it be, what I mean here is that never ever make your man feel suffocated nor being neglected. Allow each other to have a social life, be with their friends and give a "ME" time for each other. A good amount of air to breathe and waves to feel in a relationship keeps the boat sailing properly.

11. NEVER EVER SLEEP ON BIG FIGHTS AND CONFLICTS.

A small hole in a relationship will eventually grow over time if not resolved right away. Usually, a man compromises the argument just for the sake of fixing everything. But it can never be always like that. It doesn't matter who started the fight, it doesn't matter who's wrong and who's right, because what matters is that you guys know how to say sorry and swallow both of your pride to fix everything. Your man may not tell it to you directly whenever you fight, but it hurts him when he see's you cry.

12. EXERT SOME EFFORT TO LOOK GOOD FOR HIM.

Even though our man tells us that we always look pretty with or without anything in our faces but hey, there's no harm in exerting extra efforts in putting on makeups, spraying perfume and wearing nice dress when you're around him. This is not to actually make you change yourself to someone else or put on heavy, scandalous makeups and clothes just to please him. But the mere fact that he sees that you still try your best to look good for him make him feel that you are still excited to see him and have a good impression from him.

13. TALK ABOUT FUTURE PLANS WITH HIM AND MAKE IT HAPPEN TOGETHER.

Making plans and picturing yourself together for the next years is one of the sweetest thoughts in relationships. Talking about your future with him like your future house, your future kids and other plans in life, will make him see like you are really into him and that you are really committed to end up being with him for the rest of your lives. But of course, your plans together should also be put into actions. Imagine, you two, looking back to those days when you guys are just sketching your dream home then you eventually have one, with your kids with it and still the unconditional love for each other that makes your house, a HOME.

14. NEVER BRING UP YOUR EXES IN THE PICTURE.

Remember this girls, never ever bring up exes in the picture especially when you guys are quarrelling. Never compare him to your exes nor tell him to just go back to her peacocks before. Don't compare him to your exes as if they did better than he does. Well, because if they did, you wouldn't call them exes now, would you?

15. ALWAYS RESPECT EACH OTHERS' FEELINGS, THOUGHTS, AND DECISIONS.

You can never avoid arguments with each other. Knowing that us, women, are usually more sensitive than men, we ought to start arguments; sometimes even the petty things could even up being a huge argument whenever we feel like quarreling with our partner. But beyond any arguments, beyond any doubts and conflicts between the two of you, never ever disrespect each others' feelings. Of course that includes not doing anything that will void your commitment with each other, hurt each others' feelings, tell lies and anything above the sun that can disrespect each others' feelings (in short,don't date nor see another dudes when you're dating a man already, Hun). Respect his personal space if he asks for it. If you want your man to respect you and your feelings, give him it to him too.

16. ABOVE ALL WAYS TO KEEP YOUR MAN:

"TRUST AND LOVE HIM WITH ALL THE CELLS IN YOUR BODY, YOUR MIND, YOUR SOUL AND YOUR HEART."

Sis, believe me when I say trusting him will make him stay. Just like how you like him to trust you. Trusting him will make him see how mature your relationship is, how strong your foundation became, how much you really love him and remind why he loved you in the first place. Trusting him, is loving him. Sure, he could make you cry or will not buy that bag you really wanted, but honey, no man is perfect. So are you. He'll be wrong, he'll commit mistakes, but when the moment he sees you still believe in him and you still trust him despite of his imperfections, he'll think that he will never ever need another woman rather than you.

Being the woman, gives us privileges in relationships, yes. But let us never forget that in a healthy commitment, it will always be give and take. You guys have to assist each other to grow better together and always think that your love for each other is stronger than all the doubts in the world (stronger that Thanos with all the infinity stones with him). So step up your game and prove him that you too, is a diamond in the rough, worthy to be kept with his arms a lifetime~

pctto: WeHeartIt. com

[sicklylittlesnowflake]

Can you write a riverdale sickfic where Archie wakes up with a really upset stomach and doesn't want to go to school but his dad doesn't believe him and makes him go anyway and Archie is having to throw up between blocks & eventually goes to the nurse to get to go home? Thanks!

(Hey anon! Thanks for the prompt! I love me some Fred interaction!! And I love me some shoehorning in Reggie!! Can you guys tell I love Reggie //whoops. Sorry this ones a little more on the ficlet side!! I’ve been writing lengthier, heavier fics so this one was a good refresher!!)

Fred had been pretty suspicious of Archie this morning for a multitude of reasons.

For one, Archie had been coming home extra late recently and had been sneaking out. When Fred came in to get Archie’s trash while he was at school he found unfinished homework, meaning he didn’t have his homework at school. Finally, he had bumped into Alice last night and said Betty was stressing over some Science test which Archie was definitely not studying for because he was playing his guitar.

So when Archie walked in the kitchen today telling him he didn’t want to go to school because he was sick, he didn’t believe him.

“Archie, I’m not having this anymore,” Fred said firmly.

“What, dad?! I don’t understand how you can’t see that I’m sick?” Archie asked, completely bewildered.

“Don’t think I haven’t noticed you slacking off with your school work, leaving your homework—unfinished, mind you, coming home late and sneaking out, despite having to study for this huge test Alice told me you have..”

Archie looked furious and upset, “Fine! I’ll go dad. It’s good to see how much you know me.“

The red head grabbed his bag in anger and stormed out of the house, leaving Fred shocked.

"Archie!” Fred called, making his way to the door to see his son stomping away. He watched him leave, trying to ignore the doubt beginning to build in his stomach.

Archie couldn’t even make it three minutes without his stomach flipping out on him and beginning to heave. He rushed to the nearest bush and hurled, retching the contents of his stomach into the plant.

He felt awful. He felt awful because of how sick he felt, but also awful because his own father wouldn’t believe him. He felt awful because he was angry at himself, wishing he had just been more responsible this week so his father wouldn’t have doubted him.

Archie had been out with the Bulldogs last night for one of the member’s birthday, which was weird because they never spoke, and had been eating at a diner at the south side that he had never seen before.

Of course, Archie had no qualms against the south side, his best friend hailed from there. The south side got a bad rap, and while they did inexcusable things, so did the people at the north and the south always got the blame. He had been opening his eyes quite recently after uncovering the truth about Jason Blossom’s death.

However, his stomach did have qualms against the south side because apparently it did not like the food it digested the previous night. He had felt a little odd as he snuck back home, and went to bed, figuring that he was just stuffed.

Boy, was he wrong though. This morning he woke up, his stomach churning and whirling around. He felt like he was on a boat during a storm, rocking and hurling him around. He had managed to make it into the bathroom before heaving and retching last night’s dinner.

With a pounding headache, Archie went downstairs to his dad, feeling sick as a dog. When Archie was sick, he loved affection and attention, and to be doted on. Usually, it was given to him, so when Fred refused him it was a shock to his miserable system and he was furious.

As Archie finished, still feeling quite queasy and light-headed, he began to drag his zombie like body over to school. However, he barely made it to the next block before he felt liquid begin to rise up his throat and he was running over to another bush and retching yet again. He coughed and spluttered. He gagged at the disgusting, bitter taste left in his mouth and made a mental note of getting some gum and water from one of the vending machines.

This process of retching at each end of blocks kept repeating itself. He’d find himself about to enter a new one when his stomach churned and he’d be heaving, gagging and he’d hurl into a bush again. He quickly run out of things to throw up, and ended up vomiting bile. The process burned his throat.

Eventually, he made it to school and he forced his weak body into the school’s doors and into the hall.

As he made his sickly, ghost-like presence known to Riverdale High, he could see people’s reactions. He was met with looks of shock, surprise, concern, and he was just glad none of the looks belonged to any of his friends. Honestly, if they found him at this state and ask him what was wrong he’d start crying. Archie wasn’t one to conceal his emotions, and often confided in Jughead, who was always there for him no matter what, but he had a gut feeling he knew he wasn’t very rational and he’d just worry the kid unnecessarily.

Archie dragged himself to his locker, and struggled to get his combo due to a splitting headache and clammy hands. His stomach was flipping and he felt so queasy, trying to conceal his gags and tiny dry heaves. He fanned himself lightly, and wiped his clammy hands on his pants. Speaking of clammy, he was sweating immensely, like he had just gone to Football practice.

Speaking of Football practice, a loud voice filled with life and energy that Archie would kill for in his weak body rung out across the hall. The voice was crisp and clear amongst the hustle bustle and blurred chatter of the various students.

“Yo Andrews!” Reggie called, a wide, sparkling grin on his face.

Archie groaned softly to himself, not wanting to deal with this Star Boy’s snarky comments and attitude. In a way, Jughead was the same, but Archie never found Jughead something he didn’t want to deal with, and Archie began to wonder what the real difference was, and in his fevered mind he couldn’t find it.

As soon as Reggie was at the side of his locker, leaning against the locker next to him, seriously rattling it in the process, Archie gagged, dry heaving and clamping his hands around his mouth just in case anything came out of it.

Reggie’s egotistical and overly confident grin faded instantaneously, his features being taken over by worry and concern. Some sort of mental block in Reggie prevented him from being too soft, and honestly that would make Archie even more uncomfortable he would genuinely throw up.

“Woah, Andrews. I’m sure you don’t find me that gross?” Reggie commented, no actual trace of spite or meanness in his tone, his whole voice laced with worry.

Archie then took off, sprinting to the closest bathroom, unable to keep it in any longer. Each step he took caused his head to pound and throb, making him dizzy and even more queasy, threatening the sick to just burst out then and there.

Reggie had ran after him the second he took off, momentarily forgetting about this Cool Boy facade he had been putting on for the rest of the school. He had caught up no problem, seeing as Archie’s agility had been greatly compromised from this illness.

Archie burst into the thankfully empty bathroom and kicked open a stall, before retching into the toilet. Reggie stood a few feet behind him, trying not to be a dick and understand that Archie couldn’t help it, but it didn’t mean Reggie didn’t find it disgusting!

“Uh..you..okay, man?” He asked awkwardly. This was an awkward situation indeed; for one Archie was throwing up everywhere, he seriously was scared of vomit, and it was weird for both of them for Reggie to be showing his softer side.

Archie looked at him then jerked back to the toilet and continued to wretch. It was seriously hurting his throat, burning it raw and hurting his stomach. His muscles tensed and cramped uncomfortably and he put his hands to his stomach with the pain as he continued to heave and retch. He was absolutely miserable.

Reggie put his metal barriers aside, caring way more about Archie than any facade or fear he may have and approached the ginger and crouched down next to him, rubbing his back as he continued to throw up into the toilet. Once Archie was done, the bells rang.

“We’re going to be late,” Archie croaked weakly.

“Nope, I am. You’re not–you are going to the nurses and going home,” Reggie instructed firmly.

“C'mon,” Reggie coaxed gently, wrapping one strong arm around the redhead’s waist and helped him stand up. He supported him as they wobbled over to the Nurse’s office. Archie was too weak to argue and Reggie’s tone left no room for argument.

“You’re going to be late.”

“When am I not? Besides, this time, I’ll have a heroic excuse!”

“No! Reggie–..god..never mind, it’s fine, just..”

“..It’s because Jones is in my class and you don’t want me worrying him, huh?”

Archie was silent.

“It’s cool bro, don’t worry about it. But you know, he’s going to find out about it anyway, and he won’t be happy.”

Reggie didn’t press any further because by the look on Archie’s face he was content with that.

“Thanks for bringing him in, Mr Mantle,” the Nurse said politely, her face completely shifting as she met Archie’s eyes.

“And you shouldn’t have come in in the first place! Silly child!” She scolded lightly.“

"Get back to class, Mr Mantle,” The nurse commanded, before dialing for Fred and leaving to the side.

Archie managed a smile, “Reggie, thanks for this. I..it means a lot.”

Reggie managed a smile, different to his overly confident one, softer, genuine, “You ain’t heavy, Andrews.”

“Right back at ya, dude.”

He left, a smile on his face. The nurse returned shortly after, “Your dad will be here soon, Mr Andrews.”

Archie couldn’t help but roll his eyes a little, still very much annoyed with the events that played out earlier this morning.

Fred Andrews walked in about 10 minutes later, looking very flustered and concerned.

He nodded at something the nurse was saying and made his way over to the bed Archie was sitting at.

He looked genuinely so guilty and upset, “..Archie..”

Archie looked up at him and acknowledged his presence, arms still crossed and lowkey sulking. He got up and started walking with Fred out the door, an arm protectively clutching his stomach.

Fred looked so guilty he didn’t even know what to say, and stayed in an agonising silence as the two made their way over to the truck.

Archie climbed onto the truck and leaned his head against the window, his headache worsening.

“I should have believed you,” Fred said quietly.

“Yeah, you should’ve,” Archie spat out bitterly, not sure if he was genuinely that angry or if he was under the influence of his headache.

“I know. I’m not here to defend myself, I’m accepting I’m totally in the wrong and as your father..I should’ve noticed. You’re my son, Archie. I’m so sorry,” Fred apologised.

Archie didn’t reply.

Fred sighed, “I’m..really not good at this, huh? Maybe..”

Fred didn’t have to finish his sentence; Archie knew what he meant. He knew deep down his dad felt like Mary was a lot better at parenting, and that deep down he thought Archie was better off with her.

“Dad..” Archie finally replied, softer, he lifted himself off the window and shifted towards Fred’s shoulder, leaning against him. His father’s warmth was comforting and much better than any window.

Fred smiled softly, sparing a sneaky glance at his son, his gaze filled with love. He put his free hand on his shoulder, comfortingly rubbing it. They’d be home soon and he could make it up to him.