#then your show shouldn’t be or perhaps naturally isn’t “brother centric”

[castielmacleod]

It’s beyond agonising that like. Later spn seasons would have Cas absent for a string of episodes, so the show could do some salmondean case episodes (apparently the core of the show, though my eyes glazed over through most of them). And that in and of itself is whatever, except then the writers would BLAME Cas’ absence from these intentionally Casless episodes on CAS. And so you sit through all these salmondean episodes of middling to poor quality and then the next time you see your beloved side character Castiel, well guess what. Dean is fucking pissed at him for “disappearing” and is given free rein to yell, guilt trip, and act like Cas has to ask his permission to do anything or go anywhere. Never in my life have I seen a show NARRATIVELY PUNISH a regular recurring character for the crime of being recurring. I can’t emphasise enough that Cas was for external reasons deliberately kept out of the episodes that internal characters would then blame him for not being in. It is insanity inducing.

And it’s one more thing that makes it so clear that spn SHOULD have been allowed to naturally evolve into an ensemble show, because frankly it DOESN’T make sense for Cas to just leave sometimes and there is really absolutely nothing conducive about essentially writing him off and into the show multiple times a season just so it can have its precious brothers-only episodes. And I mean Cas is only the most obvious and most heavily punished example of this, but they also did it to Crowley (literally billed as a regular same as Cas through s9-12), Mary (punished horribly for it tbh, by both the narrative and the fans), and Kevin (and he was usually off on the RUN or being held captive or something horrid like that). And the thing is!! Other characters and brothers episodes don’t even have to be mutually exclusive! How devastating would it be, really, if a salmondean centric episode happened to start with “we’re heading out to xyz, bye Cas” and end with “hey everyone, we’re back”???

I just think this show could have been vastly improved if recurring characters could have been treated as like, assets to the storytelling, and not as objects to get out of the way as quickly as possible so the focus can temporarily go back to the brothers. Lol.

[sapphia]

alright so i don’t write fanfiction anymore and i haven’t even really been in this fandom for years, but if i was writing supernatural, here’s how the destiel thing would have played out: 

they gay plotline would happen about season 9-11, pacing wise. cas and dean are close and have a shared bond, and know each other pretty well at this point, but things haven’t started getting repetitive yet plot wise. the season big bad is irrelevant because lets be honest they’re all pretty much the same. 

dean and cas have spent their time in purgatory together, and i’d move the purgatory reveal flashbacks from season 15 into season 8 alongside the normal flashbacks. 

you have your usual series opener in episode one with the massive conflict semi-resolving but also setting up the season’s big bad. at this point in episode one, cas sacrifices himself for dean specifically, but also helping advance the “mission” - however, while one of them had to die to keep the other alive so the job could be finished, it could have been either of them, not necessarily cas.

this of course spawns a bit of emotional angst, with dean being hit pretty hard by cas’s death. there’s a hint that his reaction is more emotion extreme than say, bobby or jo’s death, but still a bit less than if sam had died - and also notably takes it harder than sam. this sets up the fact that cas is more than just a tag along to dean. 

cas will be brought back about episode 4 (method irrelevant), and there’ll be an emotional reveal, but nothing too out of the ordinary. everyone’s just happy to see him alive again. there’ll be dialogue specific to dean and cas, of course, but just your generic “glad you’re back/what happened while i was away” catch up

episode 5 will have no destiel content, but there will be a minor male character who sort of flirts with dean. dean doesn’t reciprocate, and is flustered, but also doesn’t reject him (perhaps because he’s flustered), setting the stage for dean-is-not-straight-and-has-repressed-bi-feelings, but this is pretty minor and easily overlooked. sam witnesses this moment.

in episode 7, you’ll have a cas/dean centric ep, where they go off and investigate either by themselves or in a way that has sam occupied and away from them for a lot of the episode. they have a mini confrontation early/mid episode where dean says cas shouldn’t have sacrificed himself, that they could have found another way, that cas should have been the one to complete the mission and dean to die. 

cas’s response here will hint at his thoughts in 15x18 regarding what dean’s done for him, but much briefer. he implies that he’d rather dean had lived; dean is a good man, and cas sort of “owes” him this because dean has helped him find his humanity. he doesn’t confess his love or anything, but the implication that cas feels love (of some sort) because of knowing dean is definitely there. 

dean should be a little uncomfortable at the raw emotions of this scene, and pulls back, though castiel will remain earnest and completely unbothered by dean’s difficulty dealing with what he’s saying

the episode continues, and the hunt goes as normal, but towards the end, dean gets injured (head or face wound). cas heals him easily, but there is a moment that lingers a little too long, with cas’s hand on dean’s face. dean is a part of it - he feels it too - but it freaks him out and he ends the moment, pretending it didn’t happen. they carry on packing up/continuing the hunt/whatever they were doing before, but the final shot of the scene is dean looking at cas and wondering - what the hell was that? 

this is going to be played out pretty slow over the series, so in between the core relationship developing episodes there’ll be normal monster of the week episodes with just your normal amount of destiel subtext. the episode following cas and dean’s moment, for example, (episode 8 and 9) will be your average sam/dean/cas hunt with nothing more than a couple of small moments between cas and dean where cas is perhaps a little too intense and dean pulls away, or there’s an awkwardness between them, especially from dean’s side. episode 10 doesn’t have cas in it at all,  because dean has made an excuse to separate himself from cas - i.e. dean jumps at the opportunity to give cas a task that means he’ll be hunting separately to him and sam

episode 11 will be a sam/dean hunt, but in the middle of the episode they find a clue/information that they need cas’s help trying to decode. sam suggests praying for cas to show up, and dean says well go ahead then. sam doesn’t make a fuss about dean not doing it himself (though he may be a bit surprised) and he prays to cas - but nothing happens. dean sighs and rolls his eyes, and says “cas, you there? we need some help” and cas appears. 

sam is (sort of) mock offended that cas comes when dean calls and not him, and cas says that he was busy and would have heard sam eventually if he’d tried praying again later, but dean has an easier time breaking through via prayer than sam (ala the “dean and i share a more profound bond” moment in season 5(?i think). like then, sam is mock offended, but isn’t really surprised. dean is keen to move the conversation past this and get cas’s help with the hunt, which cas provides, and cas decides to stick around to help fight the episode’s monster. 

the episode facilitates a scene where cas and sam are left alone on the hunt with some downtime to talk (perhaps because dean is avoiding cas) and sam brings it up, a bit curious - does cas hear dean better because cas pulled him from hell? cas admits he isn’t sure exactly what the reason is - perhaps it also has something to do with the way dean has affected him as a person. he finds that despite himself, he cares for dean more deeply than anyone else - and his feelings remain unchanged by the fact that dean seems to be avoiding him right now. but he finishes by saying he can’t help that his thoughts are more attuned to dean at all times, and that he finds himself thinking of him far too often, which probably leads to dean’s prayers finding him easier than other people’s. 

sam is pretty shocked/surprised at this - it sounds like cas is saying he’s in love with his brother. cas doesn’t confirm this explicitly, but sort of agrees, saying something along the lines of “that is a possibility”, as though he’s not quite sure. 

sam’s still processing this - can angels even fall in love? cas assures him that they can (maybe gives an example of another angel this has happened to) though it doesn’t happen often and has never really ended well. 

the scene ends either a bit awkwardly, with sam still being “oh my god what is going on” and castiel being earnest and sort of oblivious to sam’s shock, or with an attempt at lightheartedness from sam. the episode continues as normal, though sam now gets to hunt with dean and castiel with the new secret knowledge that one of them is in love with the other one and the other one probably doesn’t know. but he doesn’t really know what to do with that information, so he does nothing, just observes. 

episode 13 has no cas in it again, and it’s a sam/dean hunt. but here’s where it gets interesting - the monster is preying on men at a gay bar. 

the hunt they’re on has people going missing who have recently frequented the bar. one of the bartenders there is obviously gay, and flirts with dean a little bit during their initial questioning, even giving him his number at the end, which throws dean. sam sees the end of this interaction and notes it with amusement. 

they continue investigating - clues (or another disappearance) lead back to the gay bar, so they decide they have to check it out again. when there, they spot the same bar-tender again, and sam makes a joking comment that dean will probably get more out of him than sam will, so dean better go talk to him. dean does, and manages to be a bit more casual now he’s not as taken off-guard. dean gets the information out of him that he needs, but the conversation also hits more casual/personal territory - come comments are about what it’s like doing the job dean does, etc. dean might make a cryptic comment that hints about the supernatural nature of their work, not that the bartender would pick up on it, and answers in a way that’s both true to dean’s actual life but could be mistaken as being a thing an fbi agent would say. the bartender is less flirty during this conversation, but when he does make flirty comments, dean takes it much better and continues the conversation easily, and despite himself dean finds himself warming up to this guy. 

the hunt continues. in the early scenes, when sam and dean roll into town, dean will see two guys heavily making out outside the club, and looks away (in a prudish/not wanting to watch someone’s PDA sort of way). later in the episode, either right before the climax or right after, there will be a moment where dean sees another moment of PDA between two guys (possibly more of a sweeter scene, like holding hands, or canoodling), and dean watches for a moment, somewhat longingly. the episode won’t address it, but this is his moment where internally he starts wondering if maybe he wants that. 

the episode heads towards the conclusion when the monster takes another victim - and lo and behold, it’s our bartender. but dean and sam are getting close to finding it, and they hunt it to it’s lair. sam deals with the monster while dean rescues the bartender. it’s a generic rescue scene, and dean is very compassionate and reassuring, and the bartender is quite freaked out, as to be expected. the wrap up scene, where they take him home/back to his car/wherever, has him asking dean about what else is out there, and dean is honest - there are lots of creatures that lurk in the dark. but hopefully the bartender won’t see any more of them. if he does, here’s dean’s card - call him and dean will come. the bartender makes a joke about using it for a booty-call/to get a date with dean, and dean jokes back in a way that rebuffs that, but in a light and friendly manner. 

the series continues. there is one more dean/sam hunt and then a dean/sam/cas hunt. dean seems a little but more at ease with cas during this.

in episode 16, dean gets a call from the bartender. he picks up the phone and makes a joke about how this wasn’t supposed to be used for booty calls - before turning serious at the bartender’s answer. something is going down in that town again, and he wants dean to come check it out. dean promises he’s on his way and hangs up. 

sam is ready to go with dean, but dean tells him he’s going to go on his own. sam is surprised, but lets him. 

dean goes to the bartender’s town and investigates. something is going down, and this time the bar tender helps him along the way. there is an easy chemistry between the two of them, the sort of familiarity characters have when meeting dean and sam for the second or third time rather than the first. the bartender assists in the investigation, so is around dean a lot, and flirts with him on occasion. in contrast the previous episode, dean is much more at ease with it, he even flirts back a little at one point. but it could still all be in good fun - it doesn’t have to imply anything. 

3/4 of the way through the episode, before they go after and kill the monster, there is a slow/waiting/resting scene where dean and the bartender have the opportunity to just chat. they talk about the monster/hunting/the lifestyle a wee bit - and dean shows him something about the monster on the laptop, or in a book, or gives him a weapon and shows him how to use it - whatever it is, they get physically close for some reason. the bartender makes another flirtatious comment, and dean isn’t too sure how to respond this time. the bartender shrugs it off - it’s just some fun, he knows dean’s straight, it’s fine. 

dean’s mind is racing a hundred miles a minute, and he’s feeling an absolute cascade of emotions. maybe, he croaks out, maybe he isn’t as straight as you might think.

it’s pretty clear where this is going lol. they have a moment, they kiss, idk maybe they have sex, maybe it’s implied or left ambiguous. camera cuts away. 

when we come back to them, the plot has accelerated and it’s time to go after the monster (immediately, right now, before anyone can talk about what just happened). they hunt the monster, dean does the bulk of the work but there’s a crucial moment where bartender saves dean, mirroring the way dean saved him in his first appearance and allowing dean to finish the monster off. 

the wrap up/goodbye scene is a bit awkward, both not too sure where they stand, but there is a moment where dean admits that he liked what happened between them. but it’s pretty obvious it can’t continue - dean has to keep hunting, and the bartender is not here for that life - he likes all his limbs attached. they keep the door open though about seeing each other in future - maybe a comment about where dean’s based, and the bartender says he’s heading through that way in a month or so, maybe he can pop in and say hi, and dean agrees. 

dean goes back to the bunker, reconnects with sam who’s wrapped up his b-plot. dean is deliberately vague about the case details, and sam gets the feeling something’s off. then dean gets a call, and he takes it - but he’s squirrelly about it. 

sam’s suspicious and is worried something is really wrong. he follows dean and listens to his call - he hears dean say “hey [bartender]”, and the conversation that follows, which basically boils down to - the bartender is actually going to be in dean’s area next week instead, it turns out, maybe they could catch up, and dean says sure, but his brother is around, and dean hasn’t exactly told him about what happened or come out to him, so they have to be a bit on the downlow. he doesn’t want to seem sleazy, but maybe they could get a hotel room? cut to sam, looking pretty surprised lmao and sort of creeping away quietly, feeling bad for eavesdropping on such a personal conversation and now processing the fact that his brother is (he thinks) gay. 

ep 17 is a week later and  dean and sam are called to a case miles away - right when the bartender is supposed to visit. dean takes a private call where he regretfully tells the bartender he’s not going to be around - they won’t be able to catch up this time. this secretive behaviour reminds sam (and the audience) of dean’s secret. 

sam sort of spends the whole episode waiting for dean to come out to him, which doesn’t happen because this is still really new to dean and he’s not sure he’s ready for it. it’d be kinda fun/funny if they were fucking around with some sort of truth goddess or something, but regardless there’ll be opportunities for sam to poke dean about general things he might not be saying. sam also drops a couple of massive hints that he thinks gay people are awesome which dean obliviously ignores (or maybe starts cluing into towards the end of the episode). 

but by the time they’ve defeated whatever it is they’re hunting, dean still hasn’t said anything about being gay so while they’re in the impala diving home, sam’s like “you know, if you were gay, i’d be okay with it” and dean’s like “yeah i’m not gay” and sams like “I heard you on the phone with bartender, sounded pretty gay” and dean’s like “okay yeah we banged. but i’m not gay, i’m bi” and sams like “woah. and you never said anything?” and dean talks about how it’s sort of been coming on for a while now but he’s been trying to ignore it because he didn’t think he was that person, or maybe how there was something with a guy a long time ago but he repressed it, etc etc. and sams like “well that’s cool and you’re still my big brother, i still love you, that’s never going to change” yada yada and there’s an awesome emotional scene and they drive off into the sunset. 

BUT we still have the cas/dean plotline to wrap up in the last few episodes. sam know knows cas loves dean and dean’s bi but doesn’t know if dean loves cas and also doesn’t want to say anything in case he shouldn’t. but also wonders whether he should because it seems like dean might have feelings for cas, so as we head towards the final episodes sam keeps trying to push cas and dean into situations alone together but it’s not working very well, although they’re obviously really fucking close and sam can see just how much dean loves cas and cas loves dean but neither of them can actually see it, and eventually (like, one episode from the finale) cas says something implying quite obviously that he has feelings for dean and then leaves and dean’s totally oblivious and sam is practically banging his head against a brick wall out of frustration and just caves and is like “you know cas is in love with you, right?” and deans like “no” and sam is like “well he is. he told me” and dean’s like “whaaaaat” 

but there’s no time for dean to like, talk to cas about this, only a small amount of time where he processes his feelings for him (maybe like one scene together a but a third character is there the whole time, so dean can think about what sam told him, but can’t say anything to cas) and then the finale is really kicking off, and they’re fighting whatever the big bad is, and again there’s comes this point where someone has to sacrifice themselves and this time dean’s like “no cas i told you earlier, i don’t want you sacrificing yourself, this time it’s my turn” and cas is says “no let me, i want to do this” and dean’s like “yeah but i don’t want you to because i love you” and does the thing that should kill him

except at the last minute something else happens which stops that (sam like kills the big bad by taking it by surprise or something) and so dean doesn’t die (maybe he’s a bit injured though and cas has to heal him) and cas goes to him and there’s a very emotional scene where they elaborate on the love confession and kiss each other and sam’s like “i can’t believe a month ago i thought these men were straight”. 

and because this is supernatural something immediately goes wrong and by killing this big bad they’ve actually triggered the rising of the next big bad so there’s your plot for the next season you’re welcome, but hey now they’re gay together you’re welcome SPN writers please pay me to reboot your series in the way dean deserved. 

[d-criss-news]

Darren Criss acts as playwright when he writes songs. He’s far more confident, and certainly more vulnerable, when he allows himself to play the part. In such a way, songwriting opens up a whole new world that pulses with untapped potential. So much of what he has accomplished in 15 years resides in his willingness to expose himself to what his imagination and intuition have in store. He steps into a playwright’s shoes with considerable ease (just look at his resume), and always one to put on plenty of bravado, especially during our Zoom face-to-face, it’s the natural order of things.

“As I get older and write more and more songs, I really recognize that I’ve always preferred to write for another context other than my own,” Criss tells American Songwriter. He speaks with a cool intensity, gesturing emphatically to accentuate a sentence, and when you let him go, he’s like the Energizer Bunny 一 “I can tell by just how quiet you already are that you’re fucked,” he jokes at the start of our video chat. But he remains just as engaged and focused when listening.

He soaks in the world, taking astute notes about behavior and emotional traits he can later use in song. His storytelling, though, arrives already in character, fully formed portraits he can then relay to the world. It’s not that he can’t be vulnerable, like such greats as Randy Newman, Tom Waits, and Rufus Wainwright, who have all embroidered their work with deeply personal observations, it just doesn’t feel as comfortable. “I’ve always really admired the great songwriters of the world who are extremely introspective and can put their heart and soul on the chopping block,” he muses. “That’s a vulnerability that I think is so majestic. I’ve never had access to it. I’m not mad about it. It’s just good to know what your deal is.”

Criss’ strengths lie in his ability to braid his own experiences, as charmed as they might be, into wild, goofy fantasies. In the case of his new series “Royalties,” now streaming on Quibi, he walks a fine line between pointed commentary on the music industry, from menial songwriting sessions to constantly chasing down the next smash, and oddball comedy that is unequivocally fun. Plotted with long-standing friends and collaborators Matt and Nick Lang, co-founders of Team StarKid, created during their University of Michigan days (circa 2009), the show’s conceptual nucleus dates back more than a decade.

If “Royalties” (starring Criss and Kether Donohue) feels familiar, that’s because it is. The 10-episode show ─ boasting a smorgasbord of delightful guest stars, including Mark Hammill, Georgia King, Julianna Hough, Sabrina Carpenter, and Lil Rel Howery ─ captures the very essence of a little known web series called “Little White Lie.” Mid-summer 2009, Team StarKid uploaded the shoddy, low budget production onto YouTube, and its scrappy tale of amateur musicians seeking fame and fortune quickly found its audience, coming on the heels of “A Very Potter Musical,” co-written with and starring Criss. Little did the trio know, those initial endeavors laid the groundwork for a lifetime of creative genius.

“It’s a full circle moment,” says Criss, 33, zooming from his Los Angeles home, which he shares with his wife Mia. He’s fresh-faced and zestful in talking about the new project. 11 years separate the two series, but their connective thematic tissues remain striking. “Royalties” is far more polished, the obvious natural progression in so much time, and where “Little White Lie” soaked in soapy melodrama, the former analyzes the ins and outs of the music world through more thoughtful writing, better defined (and performed) characters, and hookier original tunes.

“Royalties” follows Sara (Donohue) and Pierce (Criss), two struggling songwriters in Los Angeles, through various career exploits and pursuits. The pilot, titled “Just That Good,” features an outlandish performance from Rufus Wainwright as a major player in dance-pop music, kickstarting the absurdity of Criss’ perfectly-heightened reality. As our two main characters stumble their way between songwriting sessions, finally uncovering hit single potential while eating a hot dog, Criss offers a glimpse into the oft-unappreciated art of songwriting.

In his own songwriting career ─ from 2010’s self-released Human EP and a deal with Columbia Records (with whom a project never materialized) to 2017’s Homework EP and Computer Games’ debut, Lost Boys Life, (a collaboration with his brother Chuck) ─ he’s learned a thing or two about the process. Something about sitting in a room with someone you’ve never met before always rang a little funny to him.

“You meet a stranger, and you have to be creative, vulnerable, and open. It’s speed-dating, essentially. It’s a different episode every time you pull it off or not. All the big songwriters will tell you all these crazy war stories. Everyone has a wacky story from songwriting,” he says. “I slowly realized I may ─ I can’t flatter myself, there are tons of creative people who are songwriters ─ have prerequisites to just put the two together [TV and music]. I’ve worked enough in television as an actor and creator. I can connect the dots. I had dual citizenship where I felt like it was really time for me to go forth with this show.”

But a packed professional life pushed the idea to the backburner.

Between six seasons of “Glee” (playing Blaine Anderson, a Warbler and lover to Chris Colfer’s Kurt Hummel), starring in “Hedwig and the Angry Inch” on Broadway, and creating Elsie Fest, a one-day outdoor festival celebrating songs of the stage and screen, he never had the time. “I was lucky enough to be busy,” he says. “As Team StarKid’s star was continuing to rise with me being separate from it, I was trying to think of a way to get involved again with songwriting.”

At one point, “Glee” had officially wrapped and his Broadway run was finished. It appeared “Royalties” may finally get its day in the sun. “I went to Chicago for a work pilgrimage with the Langs. We had a few days, and we put all our ideas on the map: every musical, feature film, show, graphic novel, and animated series we’ve ever thought of,” he says. “A lot of them were from the Langs; they were just things I was interested in as a producer or actor. We looked at all of them and made a top three.”

“Royalties” obviously made the cut.

Fast forward several years, Gail Berman’s SideCar, a production company under FOX Entertainment, was looking to produce a music show. Those early conversations, beginning at an otherwise random LA party, showed great promise in airlifting the concept from novel idea to discernible reality. Things quickly stalled, however, as they often do in Hollywood, but Criss had at least spoken his dreams into the universe.

“I finally had an outlet to put it into gear. It wasn’t until two to three years after that that things really locked in. We eventually made shorts and made a pilot presentation. We showed it to people, and it wasn’t until Quibi started making their presence known that making something seemed really appealing,” he says. “As a creator, they’re very creator-centric. They’re not a studio. They’re a platform. They are licensing IP much like when a label licenses an indie band’s album after the fact.”

Quibi has drawn severe ire over the last few months, perhaps because there is a “Wild Westness” to it, Criss says. “I think that makes some people nervous. Being my first foray into something of this kind, Quibi felt like a natural partner for us. If this had been a network or cable show, we would’ve molded it to be whatever it was.”

Format-wise, “Royalties” works best as bite-sized vignettes, charming hijinks through the boardroom and beyond, and serves as a direct response to a sea of music shows, from “Nashville” and “Empire” to “Smash.” “Those shows were bigger, more melodramatic looks at the inside base of our world. I’ve always been a goofball, and I just wanted to take the piss out of it,” he says. “This show isn’t about songwriting. It’s about songwriters… but a very wacky look at them.”

“30 Rock,” a scripted comedy loosely based around “Saturday Night Live,” in which the focus predominantly resides around the characters, rather than the business itself, was also on his mind. “It’s about the interconnectivity of the people and characters. As much of the insider knowledge that I wanted to put into our show, at the end of the day, you just want to make a fun, funny show that’s relatable to people who know nothing about songwriting and who shouldn’t have to know anything.”

Throughout 10 episodes, Criss culls the “musicality, fun, and humor” of Fountains of Wayne’s Adam Schlesinger and Max Martin, two of his biggest songwriting heroes, and covers as many genres as possible, from K-Pop to rap-caviar and classic country. While zip-lining between formats, the songs fully rely on a sturdy storytelling foundation ─ only then can Criss drape the music around the characters and their respective trajectories. “I wanted to do something where I could use all the muscles I like to flex at once, instead of compartmentalizing them,” he says. “I really love writing songs for a narrative, not necessarily for myself. I thrive a little more when I have parameters, characters, and a story to tell.”

Bonnie McKee, one of today’s greatest pop architects, takes centerstage, too, with an episode called “Kick Your Shoes Off,” in which she plays a bizarro version of herself. “She has her own story, and I’ve always been fascinated by it,” says Criss, who took her out to lunch one day to tell her about it. Initially, the singer-songwriter, known for penning hits for Katy Perry, Taio Cruz, and Britney Spears, would anchor the entire show, but it soon became apparent she would simply star in her own gloriously zany episode.

In one of the show’s standout scenes, Pierce and Sara sit in on a label meeting with McKee’s character and are tasked with writing a future hit. But they quickly learn how many cooks are in the kitchen at any given moment. Everyone from senior level executives to publicists and contracted consultants have an opinion about the artist’s music. One individual urges her to experiment, while another begs not to alienate her loyal fanbase, and then a third advises her to chronicle the entire history of music itself ─ all within three minutes or so. It’s absurd, and that’s the point. “Everyone’s been in that meeting, whether you’re in marketing or any creative discussion that has to be made on a corporate level by committee. It’s the inevitable, comedic contradictions and dissociations from not only rationality but feasibility.”

Criss also draws upon his own major label days, having signed with Sony/Columbia right off the set of “Glee,” as well as second-hand accounts from close friends. “There are so many artists, particularly young artists, who famously get chewed up and spat out by the label system,” he says. “There’s a lot of sour tastes in a lot of people’s mouths from being ‘mistreated’ by a label. I have a lot of friends who’ve had very unfortunate experiences.”

“I was really lucky. I didn’t have that. I have nothing but wonderful things to say,” he quickly adds.“It wasn’t a full-on drop or anything. I was acting, and I was spreading myself really thin. It’s a record label’s job to make product, and I was doing it piecemeal here and there. I would shoot a season [of ‘Glee’] and then do a play. I was doing too many things. I didn’t have it in me at the time to do music. I had written a few songs I thought were… fine.”

Both Criss and the label came to the same conclusion: perhaps this professional relationship just wasn’t a good fit. They parted ways, and he harbors no ill-will. In fact, he remains close friends with many folks from that time. So, it seems, a show like “Royalties” satisfies his deep hunger to make music and write songs ─ and do it totally on his own terms.

“I still say I want to put out music, and fans have been very vocal about that. I feel very fortunate they’re still interested at all,” he says. “That passion for making music really does come out in stuff like [this show].”

“Royalties” is Darren Criss at his most playful, daring, and offbeat. It’s the culmination of everything he has tirelessly worked toward over the last decade and a half. Under pressure with a limited filming schedule, he hits on all cylinders with a soundtrack, released on Republic Records, that sticks in the brain like all good pop music should do. And it would not have been the same had he, alongside Matt and Nick Lang, not formed Team StarKid 11 years ago.

Truth be told, it all began with a “Little White Lie.”

[subasekabang]

the things that make you, break you

Rating: T Word Count: 8,174 Pairings/Characters: Rhyme centric; Beat, Neku, Shiki, Joshua, and Hanekoma all are there in varying amounts. Warnings: Canon typical violence, death, and trauma. Summary: And how do you fill in the gaps for things you have forgotten? How do you start anew?

( Sometimes, God just happens to be listening to your pleas, unluckily enough )

Partners: Harmonika, Scivious

Author’s Note: Apologies for a very incomplete fic here, life got in the way, but I tried! I had a lot of fun participating nonetheless, and I’m very happy for the opportunity to write this fic. I’ll have a cleaner version up on ao3 after the bang ( and hopefully finished soon afterwards )!

Darkness. Light. Warmth. Brisk. Rhyme has some sense of awareness in the state of limbo she is in, somewhere between life and death.

And then she is alive again, they all are. It is perhaps not so much a miracle, because hadn’t they all hoped— dreamed, as one might say— that they would survive the Reapers’ Game? Should they have even expected to make it back?

And yet, they are here. She is back, and she is not. She is here, and except—

Except, except— there is something missing. There is something wrong.

She does not feel alive, not truly. At what cost is she still here, she wonders; at what cost is she allowed to be alive.

( You feel like you have forgotten what being alive feels like )

She does not ask, for she knows no one would be able to give her an answer.

–

She wonders if any of them had actually thought about what they’d do in the aftermath.

After all, for seven days, all they needed to know how to do is survive.

( And then seven days again, and again— )

They have survived, so now they must live through the fallout; in ways, it is more and less severe than they expect it to be.

At home, things are mostly the same: Beat does not see eye to eye with their parents, and even if they do not care about him, they do care about her, so they argue— she is present, more often than not, and his eyes will dart over to her, and if things escalate, well— at the very least, he does not take to storming out of the house to resolve the conflict.

It goes unsaid, but Rhyme has always been a perceptive child, and that is no less true when it comes to her brother; she notices the barely present flinch when Beat sees her watching, the flash of pain that flickers in his expression. The smell of asphalt, the sound of tires—

The way her body goes limp and hits the pavement.

And of course, she cannot blame him for holding onto that guilt still, fresh in their minds; he has had to live with the consequences of that more vividly than she has had to. So in turn, she cannot take complete fault with him for wanting to avoid repeating the past, despite his… issues with their parents.

She does wish he could find a reason to want to try to change things, for his own sake, and not for her; find a reason for things that don’t revolve around her, but—

One step at a time.

Sometimes though, sometimes she ends up wondering why it is that thinking about his reasons leaves her chest feeling so hollow. Even as the younger sibling, you have always bearded the burden of responsibility, heavy on your shoulders; so this too, this new emptiness is buried under all that weight. She smiles at him encouragingly when he asks about it and doesn’t say a thing otherwise.

–

That is probably where the problem lies, really.

None of them really want to talk about the issues that plague them. There is the unspoken knowledge that no one escaped unscathed— physically, they are fine, but they all have some ghosts that haunts them. A choice that was or wasn’t made.

A phantom feeling that lingers in their bones.

She shouldn’t be the one to play psychiatrist here, she cannot judge them on what they should or shouldn’t do, is or isn’t healthy. Sometimes they need a little bit of a push, though, and Rhyme realizes that part of the problem is with her; she does not miss the way Beat’s gaze lingers on her and the way Shiki watches her while she changes the subject. Specifically, that none of them want to speak about it around her—and who is to blame them for  feeling that way? Who wants to speak about what they saw around a child who seems to have gotten away without an issue? Who wants to talk about their issues with someone who did not experience the same thing?

She prods where she can and leaves herself out of the picture when she does, and if that means they are able to work on healing in her absence, then she cannot ask for anything more.

She smiles and bears the weight on her shoulders in silence, even as the gaps of what she is missing spreads ever further.

–

Her memories are a mess.

There are parts of the game that she can remember vividly, clear as day; that, if she were to be asked, she could recount in great detail. And then there are parts that she cannot recall so well, just bits and pieces and flashes of things that might have happened— that Rhyme cannot find it in herself to ask about because she does not want to disrupt the status quo, and perhaps it is better off if they are left thinking that she does not quite remember everything.

No, that is perhaps not all it is; perhaps it is because she is uncertain how Beat would react if she was to bridge this gap, but she does not want to give him an extra thing to worry over. That is not the way things are meant to be between them; little sister looks out for elder brother, so she will be selfishly selfless and keep these things to herself.

At what point, then, does her warm smile become less genuine and more of a forced act? At what point does her picture of innocence become a false image?

( You cannot pinpoint the moment where it began to reflect the emptiness eating you up on the inside )

–

Surprisingly, or perhaps completely unsurprisingly, he is the one to bring up that one week.

It is just the two of them, of course, as it is many a day; brother and sister are not often far apart. She knows these days, it is with a tinge of protectiveness, trying to make up for what he didn’t before, and—

“Your ice cream is meltin’, yo.” Train of thought broken, her gaze turns down to her hand— yikes, he really wasn’t kidding, huh. She munches on the cone so she can enjoy what she has while it lasts, salvage the remains of this sad puddle of cream and pulls a napkin from her pocket to clean up. Both of them are oddly quiet today, she realizes; and while it might not be too unusual for her, it certainly is for Beat, and watches her brother curiously.

“Rhymes?” There it is. She hums in acknowledgement, giving him her full attention ( which isn’t to say she usually gives him anything less than that, but given how easily distracted she’s been today, she makes sure she gives him nothing less than that ). “I’m… real sorry sis.”

That’s not particularly new to hear; there had been a lot of apologies when they’d first gotten back, for that sentiment to have lingered shouldn’t be surprising. Still, her brows raise a little, expression. “That’s, uh… I don’t know what you’re apologizing for?”

“I wanted to get it all back for ya— all your dreams ‘nd stuffs. I feel like I letcha down big time.” His head hangs a little and she frowns, opens her mouth to begin to speak, but he continues before she gets a chance to say anything. “But I’m gonna help you, I swear. I dunno how, but we’ll work on it togetha.”

And see, it’s not like she had not realized it before, and even if Beat has not noticed, it wasn’t like she has not been making her own efforts to fill in the gaps; but it is easier said than done, and there is something equal parts helpful and hurtful hearing him put it into words, knowing that even he’s realized there’s an issue. And maybe it’s because she has tried tackling all this on her own, Rhyme would like to stay hopeful, so she smiles and agrees with him, even if it doesn’t change a thing. “Sure, practice makes perfect, right?”

It doesn’t. It doesn’t, and everything stays the same. The empty feeling lingers, and she wonders how far that feeling can spread before the mirror will shatter.

And she remembers, she remembers—

–

Is it okay to just watch?

She has never been the most persistent, showed the most resistance— she might not just yield to things mindlessly, not quite that submissive, but it has never really hurt her to be complacent.

Rhyme remembers a conversation during the game, about dreams; her sentiments then match her ones now, that she will keep moving forward and surely, she will find something to fill the emptiness. Holds onto that distant hope that things will work themselves out.

She watches Beat and wonders if it is okay to do just that, watch as the distance between them grows until she can barely see him.

( One day, Rhyme thinks, no matter how much she tries, no matter how far she runs—she won’t be able to close that distance. That is life, and that is natural.

The thought still hurts to think about ).

–

“Rhyme,” A low murmur of her name catches her off guard— her head jerks up a little and she catches herself, a smile tugging at her lips as she sees the other. She does not even get the chance to greet Neku however, as he cuts her off with a gesture for her to follow him. Rhyme does so, but cannot help but feel like a child about to be scolded, the way he leads her away— enough that they have a little privacy, but still close enough so they are not out of seeing distance of the others. She’s not certain what he wants to talk about, and he does not seem to know where to start; she cannot prompt him in any way, instead settles for letting him speak when he’s ready and waits patiently.

“…How have you been?” He speaks after a moment, and her eyes crinkle a little at the edges at how awkwardly he speaks; even after all this time, Neku still struggles a bit with communicating. She is not close with him like he is with the others, so it is hard to read him completely— but they are not strangers and she can read him well enough, for the most part, to understand him.

“Fine. I’ve finally finished up the summer homework.” She fiddles with the end of her sleeves absentmindedly, wondering if there was anything in particular he was trying to get out of her, racking her mind to think if there was anything else worth mentioning. “Has Beat mentioned things have been getting better at home? It’s not much, but… I think he’s a little scared of getting his hopes up, you know? It’s never going to be a perfect situation, but it’s bearable.”

“He is?” Neku seems surprised by what she has to say, brows furrowing. “No, that wasn’t what I— listen. You’re usually the… capable one, compared to Beat so… I’m not sure if his worrying is more or less than what should be warranted, but you are worrying him. I think Shiki’s worried about you too.”

She’s not sure how to feel about his assessment of her; and she really isn’t surprised to hear this, she would have to be pretty oblivious to be unaware that there wasn’t worries, even if this is the first she’s hearing about it. Especially on Beat’s part, because he does worry, of course, and that’s part of why she loves her brother as much as she does, and it wouldn’t be like him to not worry, but— “And you too?” She can fill in some of the gaps of what he is trying to say, though she feels like she’s still missing part of the bigger picture here.

“I just—” A flash of guilt briefly his face. “It’s weird to see them mope. You didn’t— you don’t deserve to have to deal with it, but try to talk to him, if you can?”

“Yeah.” She speaks softly, back to that feeling of a child being chided, almost a bit shamefaced. “Yeah, I’ll try. I didn’t mean to… worry everyone.”

“Good.” He speaks, but his attention isn’t entirely on her, fiddling with his phone. A nervous tick he’s picked up from after the game, she’s almost certain. “And if you can’t talk to him, just find some way of getting it all out…? He might be upset if you’re keeping something from him, but I think he’d prioritize you feeling better over that.”

He might be a little more than upset, Rhyme corrects him silently. Beat is protective, not malicious— he would probably be upset, but not purposefully doing so to harm her. Regardless, she murmurs her assent, chewing on her lips for a moment before she speaks. “Hey, Neku, do you…” A long pause follows her words, it is not so much that she does not want to seem vulnerable, she is fine with that.

( No, child; perhaps it is that you have been so strong for so long that you no longer know how to be weak ).

“…Do you have a dream?”

“Do I?” Neku looks somewhere between startled and awkward now that the question has been turned to him, brows furrowed. “Sure. Maybe if you had asked me before…” Pause, a waving hand gesture “—Everything happened, I might’ve said no, maybe would have told you something vaguely related to art, but… I think it was hard to come out of that without some aspiration. Live for the future, you know?”

“Mm, I..” Rhyme wants to speak— say something, anything, the words on the tip of her tongue, but the words are so hard to form that they stick and are hard to be forced out.

I’m not sure if I remember what it’s like. I don’t know if I can anymore.

“Rhymes, Phones!” Beat’s voice cuts in, loud and clear; causes both of their heads to snap up and puts a firm end to any further conversation. “C’mon! Shiki says we’re gonna be late if you two keeps slakin’ behind like this.”

“Coming!” She shouts back, to placate him; spares Neku a brief glance. “We should probably listen, before Beat decides he needs to come over here and drag us along instead.”

“Wait, Rhyme—” He speaks when she turns away, and she turns back to give him a serene smile.

“Don’t worry.” Although, as an afterthought, she thinks those words might only spark more concern, so she hurries to finish her sentence. “Everything always works out fine.”

She’s not entirely sure if either one of them completely believe that.

But she’d like to, and for now that’s good enough.

–

Come to WildKat.

Wednesday. Noon.

Don’t be late.

–

It reads kind of like a mission mail, unknown sender and all.

There is no threat of erasure, but she feels like there might be some underlying threat in there, somewhere. Like an imprint.

Still, she has no reason to not go— well, no, that’s not true. Rhyme has several reasons not to go, if she’s being honest, given the rather cryptic manner of the message; but she only remembers hearing ( mostly ) positive things in relation to WildKat and its owner, even if she lacks much to place her own judgement. She figures she should be safe in going along with it, she trusts her own gut instincts.

She considers asking for a second opinion, but then she might end up with someone else tagging along, and while she had not been told either way, she has a feeling she is meant to attend this… meeting ( if you could call it that ) alone. And so she does.

Though, at the last minute, she does reconsider it, because she really doesn’t care for lying to Beat. But in the end, she trusts that everything will be all right and tells him that she’s running out for an errand, that she’ll see him later.

He trusts her, of course— because she can do no wrong in anyone’s mind— and though she can tell he would like to tag along, he lets her go off on her own with a brief ruffle of her hair.

She feels a little worse about it all after that, but they both have their fair share of secrets in the end

And technically speaking, she is not lying, she really does have some errands she needs to take care of, just they are few and short enough that she can take care of them beforehand, and can at least make sure she won’t head home empty handed.

The shop is empty, notably, she cannot find a sign that indicates whether it is open or not; but since a quick test shows that the door is open, she enters, hesitantly— a scrap of paper lies with a cup at the counter, and she scoops up both objects in her hands for further inspection.

Be back soon. In the meanwhile, why don’t you relax? Enjoy the moment with a nice drink. It should be to your liking.

She sniffs at the cup curiously, and, well— unsurprisingly, it smells good, so she goes ahead and takes a seat at a table and sips at the cup. Cocoa, still surprisingly warm, a hint of cream and cinnamon: it is almost exactly the way she prefers it, and as odd as that is, it is somewhat comforting for her, sips on the mug in silence while she waits.

After a while, the silence starts to get to her, and in need of a good distraction, Rhyme pulls out her phone and begins to fiddle with it. It is not so much the silence, but the fact that she is alone in a somewhat unfamiliar setting, along with several other factors that leave her perhaps a little unsettled; her fingers hover over her contacts, tentatively, considering if she should make a call ( and to who, at that ).

And then, as quick as that, things change. It is akin to feeling in the air, though she cannot spot anything different when her head turns— no, but it is in the sharp pain that causes her phone to fall from her hand and leaves breathless. It is a feeling like static noise, for a moment, there is a vivid memory that she cannot remember being hers, but it must be; familiar, like one she’s seen in her dream, because her brother is there, and Neku—

Something brushing against her hand grounds her, and her eyes focus on a figure in front of her as the pain lingers to a sting in the back of her mind. They have never met, formally speaking, but she knows him, of course. Well, knows of Joshua, anyhow; the bits and pieces that she has heard.

( Specifically, the very, very not so good things that she has heard, because she has had it drilled into her that she should she ever meet Shibuya’s Composer, she should not trust him, and that Neku is very wrong to still trust him, as Beat would say. Neku’s side of the story is more personal, one that she does not quite know, but she would like to think that his judgement is fair enough )

“My apologies. You do have quite a high imagination, don’t you?” He says, as if she would know the answer to that; stares at him, a little lost for a moment. “Still, yours is less than Neku’s. The frequency’s not supposed to be as bad in the RG. Better now?” For as condescending as he sounds, she gets the feeling that he’s at least somewhat sincere in what he says.

Regardless, her smile is mostly genuine as she shakes her head, fingers curling around her cooling cup as a comfort. “I-It’s fine, really… it’s not everyday that just anyone gets to meet with the Composer, right?”

“For most people? No.” A wry smile, a tilt of his head as he observes her. “That said, I don’t care for too much small talk. Let’s get to the point, shall we?”

She nods, though truthfully, she is not entirely sure what this is about.

“You are having a hard time adjusting, hm?” A thoughtful murmur, like he’s musing over something.

“Adjusting to what?” Again, Rhyme is not certain what he is talking about—which is almost frightening, if she thinks about it, since she should know herself best; regardless, while she might have an inkling, its best to not be a presumptuous.

“To being alive again— of course, it is debatable if Players are really dead, but in your case… well, only to be expected dear; we don’t often see people back without an entry fee, and we do that for a reason.” A frown. “Then again, given your situation, I can’t really blame you for not getting the full purpose that the game is meant to serve.”

“I…” She pauses to ponder her words, a little startled by the turn in subject: some part of her, she thinks, had hoped for this from the start, when she saw who it was to greet her here. “Is it hopeless, then? Am I meant to… move on, I suppose?”

“That’s really up to you.” He speaks, nonchalant shrug. “The fee has never meant to serve as a punishment, but for self-reflection. Most of those who come to participate in the Reapers’ Game, amongst other common qualities, are those who can serve a purpose, show worth; thus, in allowing them the chance to reflect, they can earn themselves a second chance. Those who don’t survive likely would not show enough potential, and there is no loss in them not getting back their entry fee. In your case, well— had you not sacrificed yourself then, you both surely would have made it through the week.” A briefly stop, expression playful; for a moment, Joshua seems much more human. “Your brother, in any case, perhaps could have served to learn more from all of this, don’t you think?”

That jab makes her giggle a little, even if she feels a little bad laughing at Beat when he’s absent; feet swinging out a little from her seat, a little more at ease than she had moments ago. “So then… there’s still something I need to learn?” That’s not so much an unwelcome thing to hear— she can at least take action, in that case. Besides, its not as if she thinks she doesn’t still have things to learn, heavy weight of responsibilities on her shoulders lift momentarily, reminds her that she is still a child in some aspects.

“Are you interested in learning about what you’ve lost?” Expression of mirth, a particular gleam in his eyes, and instinctively she shrinks back when he leans forward.

“How…? What does that entail?” She is timid, a little fearful, and rightfully so, all things considered— for a short moment, she is reminded of her brother’s warnings— but she is intrigued all the same, and does not shy away completely from the prospect.

“I can show you.” All-knowing Cheshire cat smiles, lips pull back to bare teeth; Peter Pan offers an immortal childhood in Neverland in the palm of his hand, held out in offer. “Shall we play a game?”

The weights on her shoulders stop her from lifting her arm, to escape away into the unknown; she feels so heavy with the burden on her shoulders, childhood that she has forgotten. Deep breath—

She shakes off her responsibilities and places a hand in his, accepts invite to be stolen away to Wonderland.

( A certain person smiles behind a cup of coffee. “Couldn’t have waited long enough for me to get back, Josh? Well, your call.” )

–

She wakes up alone.

Rhyme pushes herself up from the ground and takes a long look around— Spain Hill, she quickly gathers by the sharp scent wafting past her. Brows furrow slightly as she tries to figure out why she’s here, but draws a blank: rather, the last thing she recalls is dying, but something doesn’t completely add up. Distantly, she can hear a muffled yell, vaguely like someone shouting a name; blurs into the background noise of everyday life on the streets, but—

( She is struck with the thought that her brother must be worried sick about her. She wonders if he is around here too, given that she’d been running after him, hadn’t she? )

She can recall dying, but, well; her thoughts do not get the chance to get much further than that, a quiet chirping alert sounding from her phone gains her attention. Flipping over her phone, she scans the message; barely has time to make sense of the words when there’s a sting in her hand and, innately, some part of her knows and understands what she needs to do. Form a pact. Complete missions. Simple, however—

“Watch out!” A voice calls out to her, and she glances up from her phone in time to realize Noise have begun to surround her. Not great, but if she darts left she can probably escape. She’ll take her chances.

And just in time too, apparently; she is scooped up as she dives out of the way of a frog— startled, she peers up at her savior as her fingers grasp for a steady hold. “Gotcha! You ‘kay?” He peers down from beneath his beanie, and despite the rough look this stranger has, she cannot help but feel safe like this; some part of her innately trusts him.

 “Yeah. Thanks for saving me.” She feels like she can breathe a little easier now, though her eyes keep watching for any Noise. “Let me properly introduce myself; my name is Rhyme. It’s nice to meet you.”

( There is one memory from the game she can recall with complete clarity )

“Le’s be partners. I mean, we don’t got a lotta time to waste, y’know?” He blurts his words so suddenly and without hesitation that it makes her smile a little, clings to the safety that he brings.

“Sure.”

–

When she comes to, she is moving— being moved, that is. A low murmur from somewhere nearby cuts through the muddled buzz that is her consciousness right now; does her best to seem unconscious while she listens in to the conversation and tries to figure out things.

“— and besides, I can’t just do that, Neku. It’s Eri’s birthday we’re talking about! She’s my best friend.” Shiki. So she’s still in Shibuya, then?

“Glad to hear we’re just chopped liver.” A grumble, and Rhyme can imagine that Neku’s probably just shrugged in response. “Listen, you asked for suggestions, I offered. I was just following the directions you gave, so don’t complain.”

“I was hoping you might be a little more optimistic. Lighten up a bit!” She sighs, and she must’ve moved because Shiki suddenly sounds much closer to her than before, and she does her best to mask the slight wince that follows. “You okay, Beat? Do you need a break from carrying her?”

“Nah, not even. If anythin’, kid could stand to gain a few pounds.” And her brother is the last to speak— though his presence had been a foregone conclusion in her mind, she did not expect to be carried by anyone else. And yet, there is a sense of unfamiliarity in referring to her: does he not know her? Is this what the Composer meant by a game?

Conversation has continued on without her, though she has tuned it out while she ponders her situation, beneath her, he shifts his hold on her; a little more awake now, Rhyme now realizes that she’s been carried on his back, and her fingers dig in a little where her arms have been haphazardly slung over his shoulders. “Yo, you ‘wake, kiddo?”

Ah, jig’s up. She hums a soft acknowledgement, lifting her head up slightly. “You can put me down now.”

“Don’t count on it. We found you passed out by Hachiko. Like, no one else seemed to notice? Anyways, I don’t think Beat’s letting you go just yet.” Beat sputters protests at Shiki’s statements ( a very loud “Stop embarrassing me” is shouted ): even as strangers, her brother is the same as always. Rhyme giggles a little at their antics, resting her head back down as she makes sure her thanks is heard; admittedly, whatever had caused her to pass out in the first place was tiring her body. Which is to say, she remembers meeting with Joshua, but she doesn’t exactly know how she got here; which might be besides the point, honestly. She shuts her eyes and listens to Shiki, Neku, and Beat bicker, bites her tongue from joining in.

( Even here, she’s the odd one out, isn’t she? )

It’s fine though, she’ll use the time to glean what she can from their conversation; which is very little, truthfully speaking. Everyone seems mostly the same as she knows them, and yet, there feels something distinctively different about the people here in a way she can’t quite name. It probably doesn’t make a difference, isn’t something of her immediate concern; considers what she needs to do here instead. Unfortunately, she’s still a bit lost in that regard, and clarification does not seem to be coming anytime soon; though maybe she’ll have an opportunity to check her phone soon and she can pray that there’s something there. She doesn’t realize when it’s gone quiet, just that suddenly there are two less voices, and Beat’s repositioning his grip on her again. “Hey, you still awake, or didja fall asleep on me?”

“Asleep.” She murmurs, just to be cheeky, tapping at his arms as she pushes herself up. “I can walk from here.”

Beat seems to consider protesting for a moment before thinking better of it, crouching down a bit as he lets her hop off. “Lemme at least walk back home with ya. It’s getting late.” She peers up towards the sky and he’s right, so she’s inclined to agree, except…

That’s a bit of a problem, really. During the Reapers’ Game, that had never been an issue since besides the factors of how the game worked, people couldn’t see them anyways. Here, however…

She doesn’t have a home to go to. Which means her first manner of business is somehow getting him to leave her be— by convincing him, or some other manner of being.

“I’ll be okay! It’s not… it’s not that far from here.” If she can convince him, that’ll be easiest; though admittedly this might not be the most convincing approach. “Besides, won’t your parents mind if you’re out too late?” It’s definitely already past dinner time, and if she knows what their parents are like, then…

He makes a face at that comment. “Nah. ‘Sides, if you don’t live that far ways, then it’ll be a quick trip anyways.”

Ah. She should have predicted that, honestly. “No, really, it’s okay… I’m fine on my own.”

A scowl. “No way. Tha’s just… it’d be totally uncool of me to let ya go on your own.”

“But…” But she can’t let him, there are no words for her to say, so she falls silent, head hangs low as she screws her eyes shut. Think; she’s always had a good plan when the going gets tough ( but admittedly, life has just generally been rough lately, but she still needs something better to do ). Neither of them say a thing, before finally, he seems to give in, patience runs out quick as he lets out a growl and—

Eyes snap open with a startled gasp as her hand is pulled and she very nearly stumbles over her feet trying to keep up the sudden pace he has set. Bewildered, she stares up at him; though in hindsight, she should not be that surprised— leave it to Beat to do what she least predicts. “We’re gonna get dinner. And then you’re gonna tell me what your deal is, ‘kay?” A pause, and then he glances back at her. “And introductions, it’s gettin’ old real quick just calling you kid.”

“M’kay.” Voice barely more than a whisper, she ignores the sting of grateful tears that have gathered in the corner of her eyes— she’s not that much of a child, anymore; no reason she should be crying over something as small as this. “My name is Rhyme. It’s… it’s nice to meet you.”

( Nice to meet someone she practically knows by heart, anyways )

If that means anything to him, she cannot tell, since he turns back to looking ahead of them. “Rhyme. Cool, cool. I’m Beat.” He keeps to his word and doesn’t press her further for the time being, and she’s grateful for that; focuses on the firm, yet gentle grip on her hand as they take the familiar route to Ramen Don, uses the time to figure out what story she’s going to make up… or at least, figure out one that’ll be convincing enough to fool him, which shouldn’t be too hard, if she knows him nearly as well as she knows her own brother.

They sit up at the bar, where they are greeted by Master Chef Ken ( okay, that’s what she’s always called him growing up, anyways, moving on )— so far, same old same here too. Her feet dangle from the stool as she seats herself, and she pretends to peer over the menu in contemplation. “Pops! The usual Tonkotsu Ramen for me, extra noodles. Tell me when you know what you want?”

“Tonkotsu for me too. Please.” She murmurs, putting away the menu.

“Two tonkotsu ramen, coming right up.” Ken disappears towards the back, leaving the two of them alone again.

“So you’re a fan of the classic meat? Or are you just not that picky?” He asks, and she half shrugs in response.

“A little of both. My brother’s favorite is tonkotsu too… so it’s what I’m used to.” It’s odd speaking about Beat like he’s not right here with her, but that’s for the best, it’d be even weirder otherwise.

“You have a brother? Older or younger?”

“Older. It’s just us two.” She has to bite back a small laugh at the irony of this.

“Some older brotha’ he is, letting you runs ‘round like this unsupervised.” He grumbles, squinting at her. “Ain’tcha like, eight..? How old’s you anyways?”

She pouts a little, but it is in good nature; naturally, it is reinvent of the bantering she is used to between them. “I’m twelve, jeez. I’m not that young.”

“Still young enough that ya shouldn’t be outs on your own, pipsqueak.” He elbows her none too gently, but she had already braced herself for such and doesn’t tilt too far off her seat. “Wha’s so good about a brother who doesn’ keep his lil’ sis safe?”

“He keeps me plenty safe.” Rhyme disagrees; almost too safe, sometimes, she could argue. “Besides, he’s my brother. Why wouldn’t I love him? He’s… sweet.” Sure, not without his own flaws, and they certainly don’t always see eye to eye— but that doesn’t mean she loves Beat any less. Certainly not enough of a reason for her to speak ill of him; the thought of complaining about her brother to his double seems wrong, anyhow.

“Wha’ever, I still have some choice words to say when we getcha home.” He huffs, a pinch of annoyance in his expression— head lifts up, a sniff of the air. “Food’s commin’.” Like some sort of sixth sense, he is indeed correct, as their bowls are brought out to them, though Rhyme’s pretty sure he probably could just hear them finish cooking.

She’s barely finished uttering a quiet thanks for her food, while Beat has already begun to dig into his dish; she bites back a soft giggle, how very much like him.

( Ah. This is no good. It’s been barely, what? A few hours? She is not quite homesick, per say, but missing her brother wasn’t something she’d factored into being an issue— then again, how was she supposed to expect this? Well, no: she probably should’ve known whatever she agreed to with the Composer would’ve been unexpected )

She realizes she’s probably being too quiet and picks up her chopsticks to start eating before she raises any suspicion on his part. Rich broth, well cooked noodles; this is the taste of home, a familiar comfort for this troubled moment in time. There is a brief moment, where her hand moves almost instinctively before she catches herself— habits kick in easily when her mind thinks she is in the same place, with the same person. She is used to bequeathing the meat chunks in her soup to her brother and pilfering some of the noodles from his dish in exchange; but that would be weird action coming from a stranger, and she hangs her head with an embarrassed flush of her cheeks. Again, grateful that he is too busy eating to note any of this, and focuses on actually eating this time, lest her food goes cold.

Beside her, Beat makes a noise of satisfaction when he’s finished eating; leaning on one arm as he observes her. “You shouldn’t put your elbows on the table.” She murmurs after thoroughly chewing a mouthful of noodles. “It’s bad manners.”

“So what? It ain’t in my style to care ‘bout what other people think, yo.” Though he does seem to consider her words and lifts his arm from the countertop; straightening his back. Nothing else is said on the topic, the only noise is other patrons in the shop and the quiet slurp as she eats. She pushes her bowl away when she finishes, murmurs a quick thanks as she pats at her pockets. She should have her wallet on her still, since she’d gone shopping with it this morning…

“What’cha doing?” She stops when he speaks, expression like a deer in the headlights.

“Paying…?” Rhyme says slowly, like it is a perfectly normal and acceptable thing to be doing.

“Stop that, ain’t gonna make a kid for your meal. What kinda messed up world do ya live in?” He pulls out his own wallet, producing the correct amount of change for their meal— she wants to protest, but knows it will do her no good, stifles her feelings and drops her hand; a brief moment, she is briefly reminded of the weight on her shoulders. And then she breathes out, shakes it off, and waves farewell to Ken as she follows Beat out of the shop.

They walk for a bit, because he does not press her to speak, and she doesn’t really know where to start, but she does want to, because they made a deal, and also because even if he’s not her brother, she still doesn’t like hiding things from him. But she can’t tell him the truth, that much was obvious from the start, so she’ll go through with the made-up story like she planned.

Or at least, that had been the plan, but then her mind went and blurted out something else altogether. “I— I’m lost.” Well, that’s not quite a lie. She certainly feels lost, at the very least. “Well, n-not exactly lost, but… I can’t go home right now.”

“How come?” He asks, prods the subject; because he is Beat, she knows it is equal parts out of concern, and out of impatience. Though really, she needs that extra prod right now, if she’s to be honest.

“It’s… complicated.” Particularly because she doesn’t know what exactly she’s supposed to be doing— getting from this. “I just have to wait until I can go home.” There is some truth to that: wait, and do some things, probably. It is just a matter of what she has to do.

“…So you don’t got no place to go, yo. Tha’s messed up.” He says after a moment, and— glad you’re following along, Beat. She nods, the quiet beginnings of an apology dripping from her lips before he shushes her. “Don’chu dare apologize ‘cause I asked in the first place. It’s aight man, think I’ve got an idea. You up for a walk?”

She doesn’t really have many options at the moment, and then there’s the fact that, innately, she trusts him, she will always trust Beat; despite the fact that there may be some flaw in this ‘idea’ of his, she lets him lead the way. After a while she gets an inkling that she knows where they’re going, and it’s admittedly a decent one, even if her reasoning is a different reason than his.

Beat pushes the door open to WildKat like it’s his front door, drags her inside without waiting for any cue that the shop was even open. “Yo, H-Man! You here?”

“No need t’ yell. You’re gonna scare customers one of these days.” Calm voice chides, WildKat’s owner stands there before them. Even back home, she had never met Mr. Hanekoma, so she has no frame of reference of what to expect, for once, a fact that is somewhat refreshing. “This your cousin or somethin’?” Uncomfortably, Rhyme pointedly avoids his gaze, takes a sudden interest in the tiled floor. That just hits a little too close to home right now for her to want to acknowledge— rather, cannot acknowledge, really.

Thankfully, Beat had either missed what he said, or has opted to ignore it, swinging his arm around her shoulders. “H-Man’s cool, Rhyme; relax. You can trust him, trust me. This is Rhyme, by the way, Mr. H. She don’t gots a place right now, so I thought you might be cool with lettin’ her hang here for a while.”

“Do I look like a place for strays to you?” He gripes, and Beat must’ve given him some kind of look, because he follows that up with a sharp laugh. “Aw— don’t give me that look, kid; I was joking. You really thought I was gonna say no? C’mon, I’m not nearly that cruel. You’ll just owe me a favor for this.” Her gaze finally snaps away from the tiles upon hearing that.

“But you cruel enough ta make me owe you one? You drive a hard bargain, but—”

“Th-That’s not necessary. I can— I’ll help out while I’m here to make up for it.” Granted, she probably would have offered to do so anyhow— it’s the least she could do— but especially because Rhyme doesn’t want her presence to be any more of a bother than it’s already been.

“Oh?” For the first time, his gaze really seems to settle on her; peering at her from over the rim of his glasses. “Could maybe stand to learn a thin’ or two from her, Skulls.”

“Naw. Beat wouldn’t be Beat if he did.” She can hear him sputter a little when she speaks and smiles at the hand that settles on her head; does not notice a distant pair of eyes watching the pair of them.

“Fair point. Anyways, you can leave her wit’ me. Hope ya don’t mind the couch, lil’ missy.”

“It’s more than fine, thank you.” A table would have been acceptable, honestly; shoulders sag with relief.

Beat ( not so ) gently slaps her back. “See? Toldja you could trust ‘im.”

“Aight children, say goodnight. One of ya needs to get home before curfew hits.”

“It’s not that late, H-Man.” Beat looks a little put out; but, after a moment’s hesitation, he complies— either he must really respects Hanekoma, or doesn’t want to push his luck tonight. Maybe a little of both, plus depending on their parents; she can only wonder what that relation is like, here. “’kay. I’ll swing by sometime tomorrow, aight?”

“You— you will?” She curses herself for slipping up a little, doesn’t mean to seem so surprised; but they are supposed to be strangers, so its excusable, at least.

“Course. It’s a promise, yo.” He bumps is hand against hers, pinky to pinky— then raises his hand in farewell. “See ya, H-Man.”

“Get going, kid.” It’s said in a kindly manner, she thinks; curious if that is usually characteristic of him to do so, but does not get long to ponder that thought because he turns towards her. “Let’s get you settled for the night, kid.”

–

It’s hard to distinguish between what are her memories and what are not sometimes, when bits and pieces of it comes to her in her sleep. Sometimes it is easy to tell what is real, in the exaggerated manner of certain things.

Sometimes, things feel too real to not be at least somewhat rooted in reality, like a hand tightly clasped around her and—

She starts awake, eyes snap open, and she stares up at the ceiling tiredly for a long moment before rolling over on the couch. Even here, she cannot escape nightmares.

( When she was a much younger, younger child; when faced with a nightmare, it had not been her parents she’d ran to, but straight to the comfort of her brother’s bed. For so long, he had stood as a paragon of a protector, so even at the slightest problem she’d run to him, and then—

And then—

Little girl grew up, and stopped running to him for every little thing.

Sometimes, she wishes she could go back to being that child again and talk about the dreams that haunt her. She’s sure Beat would still comfort her, the same way he always has ).

Her hands graze over her neck, like she can still feel a phantom ghost of a touch there, and— she shudders; she supposes that she’s not getting back to sleep quite yet. She gets up from the couch to grab a glass of water, give her something to distract herself with. She walks quietly, does not want to disturb the peace of the night; intrude on a place she doesn’t belong to. She has already been assured to make herself at home, but even reaching into a cupboard feels odd— she’ll probably apologize for intruding in the morning.

Glass in hand, Rhyme turns around— very nearly loses grasp on her glass as she comes face to face with a figure lounging on the countertop. Almost screams, actually; if it were not for the hand slapped over her mouth that makes her a little more aware of her actions.

Oh, right— Mr. Hanekoma had mentioned something about having someone else around, huh? Probably shouldn’t be that surprised. Then again, Joshua was just hanging out there in the dark, so her alarm might be justified, all things considered. Anyways.

“Didn’t mean to startle you. You’re Rhyme, right? I’m Joshua.” Serene smile, all too knowing; though she is fairly certain that this is not the Joshua that she familiar with.

“Right. It’s nice to meet you…?” She wonders if it’d be rude of her to start edging away now.

“I’ve got a message for you. From the me that you know, if that makes sense to you.” It does, if not raises some ( slightly unrelated ) questions, but she figures that must be the Composer’s privilege. She gestures for him to continue speaking, and he crosses his legs. “There are no set terms to this game. This is for your benefit, so you are to find the answer to your dilemma on your own. That’s it. We will be watching, as he says.”

Who is this ‘we’, she wonders— the two of them? “And you?”

“Just the messenger, dear.” He hums, though there’s a certain look in his eyes, and she considers the fact that she probably shouldn’t take what he says at face value.

“Is that all…?” Part of her feels like that can’t be it, given all the warnings she has heard about him before, and part of her feels like there should be something else she has to say; but he simply smiles at her, so she opts to take her leave before she regrets staying and returns to the couch.

So, there are no rules to this game. She mulls over this revelation, fingers tapping against glass mug. But she’s supposed to figure it out on her own terms? That might… take longer than she expected. And watching, her progress will be watched? If she had not been through the reaper’s game before, she might feel upset over this thought; but as she is not, if anything, it is reassuring.

…Still, she needs to get a plan together if she wants this to go well. She sighs, head tilting up to stare up at the ceiling.

It’s going to be a long night.

[yoyoplisetsky]

hi! a lot of you are new since the last time i did this, so here’s a quick rundown of what you’re about to read: i do a weekly rec list of all of the fics that i’ve read/enjoyed and all of what i’ve written, with a short review of each one, to let everyone appreciate what i appreciate. basically, a roundup for me to see that i’ve been writing, and an appreciation post for so many authors in the fandom. it’s been a while bc i got busy with shit bang/reverse bang, so this is one for the whole month - after this one, though, i’m going back to weekly/bi-weekly ones depending on how busy i am. always always always please send me fic recs bc i want to appreciate everyone’s favorites, and everyone to appreciate mine. so here we go! 

please remember to leave a kudos/comment on these if you enjoy them - authors thrive on praise.

(Some Of) What I Read This Month (Mid July-Late August 2017)

story of my life - vodkawrites - @vodkawrites​ - There are 3,140,000 results on Google Search for why you should meet your idol. Meeting your idol could allow you to tell them personally how much they mean to you and can inspire you to be more like your idol. / However, there are 20,300,000 reasons why you shouldn't meet your idol. / Or; AU where Victor is a famous author and Yuuri is his biggest fan. (Super cute story where Viktor is a famous author who writes about figure skating and Yuuri is a World Champion figure skater but VIktor doesn’t know)

Open At The Touch - kiaronna - @kiaronna​ -  Maybe Nishigori got ahold of a lock of Viktor's hair, and some Polyjuice potion. Maybe it's all an elaborate prank. With this as his only reasonable explanation, he steps forward, snags Viktor by his robes and tugs him in. / "Nishigori," he says in Japanese, "this prank isn't funny. Your English is better than when I left, though." / "Ah," says the fake Viktor Nikiforov in English, voice dipping, and is he blushing? "What was that?" / "Maybe I got hit in the head by a Bludger," Yuuri muses. Viktor's smile grows ever wider, tightening at the edges. "Maybe I never came home from my international Quidditch competition. Maybe I'm lying in the hospital right now, hallucinating." / There has to be an explanation, mystical and magical or medical, for the best Seeker in the Quidditch world showing up at his door; something besides his portrait, which won't stop talking to Yuuri anyway. (Ahhh an amazing hp au with them both as quidditch players and viktor showing up to train viktor - the stuff with the portrait is one of the favorite things i’ve ever read in an hp au)

Blog About It - Dawn on ICE (Dawn_Blossom) - @dawnonice​ - Victor creates a blog where he posts about his husband, skating, and his husband's skating. Only, shockingly, it turns out that saying he's "literally Victor Nikiforov" on tumblr does absolutely nothing to convince anybody of his identity, even though he was never trying to hide it in the first place. (I, too, claim to be literally Viktor Nikiforov, but unfortunately am not. A super cute take on a social media fic - which is one of my favorite tropes)

Five Times Yuuri Did Something He Regretted With Victor - liliths - @mckkachins​ - —and one exception. / "Extend," Victor said, so Yuuri extended his arms a bit further. / "Stretch," Victor said, so Yuuri stretched his free leg out a bit further. / "Jump," Victor said, and Yuuri never had to ask "how high?" / "Yuuri, eat this flaming-hot chili pepper that I bought from the market," Victor said, and the first thing that came out of his mouth was the tea he had been drinking. / Yuuri and Victor-centric, in which Yuuri makes questionable life decisions with humorous outcomes and with Victor by his side. Oneshot. (a precious and hilarious fic about them coming to live with each other. i’m in love with their love)

“sleep with” is a stupid idiom - seventhstar - @pencilwalla​ - In one universe, Viktor asks Yuuri to sleep with him on his first night in Hasetsu and gets rejected. / In another, he doesn't. This happens instead. (we all know i’m weak for nuri’s writing, but this story is exceptional. read the other in the series too - i laughed. poor, sweet yuuri)

Surrogate - rougeandtonic - (unsure of tumblr, please tell me if you know) - In which Yuuri is broke and jobless and carrying a baby for retired figure skater Victor Nikiforov, Victor is intent on breaking every one of their surrogacy agency's rules, and Phichit tries really, really hard to be a voice of reason. (one of my first dives into a/b/o fic - it’s a trope i usually avoid, but this fic has a fun premise, and i’m excited it was linked to me. i’m looking forwad to more)

...or it didn’t happen - Lady_Ganesh - (tumblr unknown, please tell me if you know) - The morning after the banquet, Yuuri wakes up to a hangover, a few fuzzy memories of the previous night and the realization that he sent some guy dickpics last night...and had gotten one back. / Cyrillic guy seemed nice. Friendly. Somebody he might have wanted to hang out with, if things had been different. / Yuuri hoped he hadn't pretended the guy was Victor Nikiforov or something stupid like that. When he got that drunk, all bets were off. (ahhh a great take on what could have happened at the banquet)

Raison d'Être - cutesudon (vityanikiforova) - @cutesudon / @vityanikiforova - 1. reason or justification for existence; the thing that is most important to someone or something; the sole or ultimate purpose of someone. / President Nikiforov of Russia has a few weaknesses: premium rye vodka, an attention span of 30 minutes, and a torrid love affair with the Japanese Prime Minister. (mmm, yes. this is a very good fic. i’m looking forward to the rest of the verse, there’s some great stuff coming)

Matched - DefiantDreams - @gia-comeatme - If three men are all in love with each other, in how many ways can there be a couple? / (Hint: Polyamory.) / Or: / Chris and Yuuri match on Tinder, but they're both in love with Victor Nikiforov (and Victor Nikiforov is in love with them). (SO I MIGHT NOT HAVE READ THE FINISHED VERSION OF THIS YET but i betaed for it and it is a simply amazing fic, you really really need to read it.)

On Online and Offline Love - AlexWSpark - @alexwspark - Gaming/Streaming AU: In which Yuuri and Victor are gamers, head over heels for each other, and hoping to one day come face-to-face. Of course, when two whipped, adorable fluff-balls are involved, shenanigans ensue... / Mature rating only applies to the final chapter. Chapter titles are taken from the Final Fantasy 9 soundtrack <3 (look, i know legit nothing about gaming but i heard some great stuff about this fic and was not disappointed. it was amazing)

Misconceptions and Truths About Vampires - glassteacup - (tumblr unknown, please tell me if you know) - Yuuri and Phichit have been living in Detroit for the past five years. Yuuri gives lessons at the local rink and has a new student. Featuring - Yuuri is terrible at being a vampire, Phichit is an amazing best friend, and Viktor is bedazzling like the sun. / Yuuri pokes at his dinner, toppling the neatly piled tower of raw beef on the third try. / Phichit reaches across the table and swats his fork hand. “Stop playing with your food.” / Yuuri sets his mouth in a straight line. “I’m not playing,” he grouses. There’s only so much steak tartare one can eat three times a day. / Phichit rolls his eyes and returns to his phone, finger flicking at the screen rapidly. He's probably busy with ordering "delivery" on one of his apps. Yuuri wisely keeps his mouth shut except for opening it in between shoving in forkfuls of food. (i read a lot of vampire aus recently and this one was hilarious. a very different take on it, and i love itI)

when the ice melts in the snow (that’s when you’ll love me) - lilithiumwords - @amberstarfight - Katsuki Yuuri is the worst incubus in the Underworld. Viktor Nikiforov is his human target. (so i might have reread this entire fic with the newest update, but, you know, that’s fine. it’s such a fun demon au with so much mythology woven in. i love it.)

Falling For Your Charms - Reiya - @kazliin - Professor Katsuki’s crush on Professor Nikiforov is supposed to be a great secret. / So naturally, the whole school knows (i need to convince all of no one in this fandom that kaz is a genius, but this fic is so fluffy and soft. i love the take on an hp au that doesn’t have them as students. i’m so excited to see what comes next ^-^)

boy next door - wingchestr - @softboyyuuri / @yuurispasteldildo - “Hi, welcome to the Green Bean,” Yuuri says, in the way that’s become something of a joke between them. “What can I get for you today?” / In which Viktor buys way too much coffee from the cute barista at the coffeeshop on the corner, and Yuuri has a terrible crush that Viktor never, ever needs to know about, and somehow it all works out in the end. (like i said, i’m incredibly new to enjoying a/b/o dynamics, but this one is amazingly soft. i love it so far)

Twingenuity - Caeseria - @caeseria - Victor arrives in Hasetsu, completely unaware that Yuuri has an identical, overly affectionate, twin brother. The resulting temptation might actually kill him before he gets Yuuri to the GPF like he promised. (you all know i have a yuuri/viktor/yuuri thing, and this is a different take on that trope, but i love it so much. i started the fic months ago but got distracted and left it behind, and i just finished it right before the last few chapters went up. koji is probably my favorite oc in the entire fandom)

“Be My Sex Coach, Victor!” - lucycamui - @lucycamui - Yuuri Katsuki has always been his own worst critic, and a series of unfortunate short-lived relationships has him convinced that he flubs things more in the bedroom than out on the ice. So, of course it would turn out that the ridiculously charming Russian he's matched with online is a pornstar. / But perhaps, a 'professional opinion' is exactly what Yuuri needs... (”Oh, the pornstar au updated!” is not something that I thought I would yell excitedly, but yet here I am. This fic is written so wonderfully and has a perfect mix of humor and smut that i just,,, i adore this fic so much. I’m so glad i gave it a shot.)

Sympathy for the Devil - Mythmaker - @catamight - “…Are you telling me, that becoming a creature of the night has cured my anxiety?” he hissed, glaring at the wall so he wouldn’t glare at Phichit. For a brief moment, he thought he saw a flash of red reflect off nearby surfaces. / His friend actually had the gall to start laughing, and it sounded a tad hysterical. / -- / Yuuri Katsuki lost his dog, lost his ability to place higher than 6th at the Sochi Grand Prix final, and lost his pride when Viktor Nikiforov didn't know who he was. After the night of the banquet, he also loses something else. Something kind of important. / Something like his mortality. (Viktor has barely even come into play in this au yet and I still love it. It’s such a fun vampire au and Phichit is the Best and I love him him.)

(Some Of) What I Wrote This Month (Mid July-Late August 2017)

a picture’s worth a thousand words - Yuuri woke up that morning with 3 things: a hangover that rivaled all his past hangovers put together, all of his blankets and pillows and, apparently, clothing strewn on the floor, and a picture of him and Viktor Nikiforov that made him look even more like a stalker as his phone background. (Or: The canon divergent au where Yuuri takes a bunch of selfies with Viktor at the banquet but deletes them all)

desserts is stressed spelled backwards - Viktor was an insomniac who was lured to the door of his mysterious neighbor who liked to bake at night. One night, when Viktor took his dog out for a walk, he smelled cookies and left a note on his neighbor’s door saying how good it smelled... (My reverse bang fic! check out this art and this art)

call of the wild - After his failure at the Grand Prix Final in Sochi, Yuuri goes home, but home isn't back to Hasetsu. Home is the sea, where Yuuri lives as a siren, who feels as though he's a failure to his family because he's yet to place a successful Call on a mortal. It reaches Yuuri that Viktor Nikiforov has shown up in Hasetsu to coach Yuuri, and Yuuri doesn't understand why, and doesn't feel worthy. He's not even human, but for some reason, Viktor has chosen to coach him. Nonetheless he goes back to shore. / For some strange reason, Viktor Nikiforov seems unbelievably attracted to Yuuri. / (Or: The canon divergent au where Yuuri is a siren.) (My shit bang fic!! Check out the art)