#therapy session episode

[girl4music]

DIANE: “Wait. You were dressed…”

TRAVIS: “As Frank-N-Furter from ‘Rocky Horror Picture Show’”

DIANE:

*laughing*

“And you, you half-nelsoned him?”

TRAVIS: “Yeah, I mean, it wasn’t a big deal. I wrestled in high school, and that guy… I mean, men who beat women are just cowards. But, you know, it gave me a taste for the hero thing, I guess, and I never looked back.”

DIANE: “You did it again.”

TRAVIS: “Did what?”

DIANE: “You dismissed your own bravery. You are a straight-up hero in that story, Travis. How many people do you think would shoulder their way through a door instead of just calling the police? In drag, no less.”

TRAVIS: “She could have died if I waited for the police.”

DIANE: “Yeah, your friend didn’t go in.”

TRAVIS: “Damn it Janet? He didn’t wanna mess up his makeup.”

DIANE: “Travis, why is it so hard for you to acknowledge who you are? Who gave you so much shame to carry?”

TRAVIS: “I’m not ashamed.”

DIANE: “Right. You’re not ashamed. You’re just not all that brave. And then when you are brave, it’s not that you were brave, it’s that everyone else is a coward. Do you know how many men would like to try drag but can’t let themselves?”

TRAVIS: “It wasn’t drag. It was ‘Rocky Horror Picture Show’”

DIANE: “Do you know how few gay firefighters, gay cops, gay soldiers will ever come out of the closet? Do you know how few human beings will tackle men who are beating their wives? You are brave. You are fierce. And your pet rabbit is just a guy figuring things out. He’s not on your level. Doesn’t make him a monster. Doesn’t make him a coward. It makes you extraordinary.”

That’s exactly it. Travis does not own his bravery so he makes everyone else and everything else that isn’t at his level the coward. Well put, Diane. I wondered why he was going so hard on the new guy. The “Probie” as he kept calling him. I thought to myself “He can’t hate Dixon that bad that he also hates his son”, what gives?

I get it now Diane has put words to his complex.

He cannot own up to who he is not because he can’t be who he is. He has no problem there when every other gay man within a block’s distance from him can’t. It’s because he can’t own up to his own bravery. He feels shame that he is able to be braver than most.

It’s so awful that it took psychoanalysis to bring it out.

That others aren’t the cowardly weak villains.

It’s that he is the brave strong hero.

And he cannot own that.

God that’s awful.

[eva-birdman-art]

Now that the episode is up I can share my horrible vision

[imtoolazytoo]

“You can’t see this, but you have the cold, calculated demeanor of someone not to fuck with.”

[oatmealuv]

love for love’s sake carefully, and beautifully handled mental health. they didn’t sugar coat the depression myungha and yeowoon were experiencing.

a lot of times in bl we see characters going through hardships, but by the magic of love they’re better again or everything gets fixed. external love definitely plays a huge part in healing and being able to get through hard situations more swiftly, but it’s hardly ever the sole solution.

myungha getting a bf didn’t cure him, gaining friends didn’t cure him. he had two guys wrapped around his finger, his grandma was alive yet he still has low self worth. he’s someone that has been depressed for so long, has had deeply ingrained negative beliefs about himself that have kept him from ever being truly happy. he believes that nobody could ever love him, he can’t bother anybody with his problems because he’s a burden.

this is why depressed people isolate, they believe all of the things the depression is telling them and it is incredibly difficult to change that. it can take years to change the way you percieve yourself and the world, i think the buffs were the blockages in myungha’s perception. when yeowoon said “i love you” to him, there was an error message because deep in his soul he believes that as an impossibility. his buffs were because of his attempts to getting close to yeowoon, he saw it as a danger because getting close would mean that he would burden yeowoon.

myungha’s life was so so sad, poor guy was dealt such bad cards. his mom living happily without him as if he never existed served as proof of the negative things he’s been telling himself. realizing that you’re nothing to no one, that you’re hard to love or you’re too much is such a hard pill to swallow. it might not be objectively true, but if your mind believes it, then that’s all it takes to completely break your spirit. myungha kills himself because he sees no reason for his life, his mom abandoned him, his gf broke up with him, and his grandmother is dead. his reason for life is reliant on other people it isn’t an internal reason.

now when he’s in the game, he’s faced with the choice of who he loves more, yeowoon or his grandma. i think that they decide to make him choose between them because he can’t fathom receiving love from two people at once. it’s overwhelming, and terrifying for someone that has had limited quantities of love his whole life. his love for yeowoon is the truest love he’s ever felt besides his grandmother. yeowoon and myungha are equals, share a lot of similar life experiences, yeowoon opens up his heart and is ready to be there for him unconditionally. even when myungha refuses to share what he’s feeling, when he is actively breaking his heart, he is willing to change whatever it takes just to be around him. having someone show you that unconditional love is both incredible and so scary at the same time. that person is seeing you at your most vulnerable, at your worst and still choosing you.

myungha is used to self-abandonment, it’s all he knows. he felt like choosing yeowoon would mean choosing himself, and in turn would mean he is selfish and leaving is grandmother to die. if he chose his grandmother he would stick to his usual self, but yeowoon would possibly go back to how he was in the beginning and die. to him everything seems like a huge risk because he feels the weight of the world on his shoulders. of course in the game that really was the consequence, choose one life over another. but i think this show really did a great job at showing just how impossible choices can be when you’re depressed, how warped your point of view gets. but i couldn’t help to think what would’ve happened if he had chosen himself, maybe that’s what he was supposed to do.

[humanmorph]

therapy, huh

[legobiwan]

Malevolent 43

[lenny-zesty]

convinced my therapist to watch murder drones

[incorrecttowerofgodquotes]

[liliavalley]

that new malevolent episode rocked my shit so bad I keep switching in between a state of bewildered laughter and stunned horrified silence

[empty-blog-for-lurking]

I am still thinking about tmagp 2, did you know that ep was written specifically for me?

[castieldelamancha]

no but i really love the suit plot, because it's funny, but also because through it you can see stede finally finding his self confidence, he has found his oomph

[npdclaraoswald]

Was looking through the main tag for The Bright Sessions and saw a post complaining that all the characters use therapy speak. For a show for which the basic concept is that the characters are attending therapy

[vincentsleftear]

So. When do David and Kristin kiss. 😏.

[yay-depression]

bobby standing up to his abusive father sure is making me feel… emotions

[ifwallscouldtalk-atz]

At this point there's no turning back. I tried to convince myself that I cannot set my standards irl after Prapai and Payu but I just keep thinking about how much I would like to be with someone like them.

Am I completely doomed? I think, yes.

[gummywurm-gaming]

Me after watching thanks to them (toh special)