#there are some heavy stuff in here

[erigold13261]

What was/is Team Sayu and Neon J’s childhood like? (Is it bad) (most likely bad) (is it any different in canon and FRAU)

The Sayu Crew's childhoods are relatively the same with just some minor changes to choices, Remi has some major changes because of Eve. Neon's childhood is vastly different from OG to FRAU.

But uh, for the most part they are not good. Please read the trigger warning. Also it's really long.

[Trigger warning for abuse(financial, physical, emotional), transphobia, homophobia, fatphobia, hate crimes/murder, eating disorders, forced unnecessary medical surgery (mention of lobotomies), ableism, suicide/suicidal thoughts, alcohol/drug use, underage drinking, drunk driving/car crash]

OG Tila and Sofa have relatively the same childhoods as their FRAU counterparts.

Tila's family put her into singing classes at a young age and pushed her to keep her voice up in the hopes she will make it big as a singer. She obviously does because of Sayu, but shortly before that her family finds out she is a lesbian. OG Tila was able to run away from her family and get emancipated from them when the Crew signed up with NSR thanks to Eve's help. FRAU Tila though never had a connection to Eve through Remi, so she (and the others) were never emancipated. So now her family basically take her money as compensation for a "disgrace" of a daughter (there are no real laws to this because she is a minor in their care, so they technically have a right to take her money). Tila is too afraid of her parents to really fight back or say anything and is terrified of them trying to force a guy into her life if she starts trying to date other girls so she just focuses on work.

Sofa's family was always pushing them to lose weight and try to look better or be "healthier" even though their weight was never a problem and didn't impact their health. The constant belittling and comparing of their body caused them to isolate and start delving into computers where they learned they liked programing and editing videos. Which just made their family even more judgmental of them. They sorta accepted Sofa for coming out as nonbinary, but they kept making remarks like "no one will ever take your gender seriously when you look like that" (basically saying only skinny people are nonbinary, which is not true at all). Sofa honestly thought a lot about ending their life, especially when being forced to exercise to the point of throwing up sometimes.

Once the Crew was formed and they joined NSR, OG Sofa was able to get away from their family and learn how to love their body the way it is. They even started exercising more out of enjoyment with Dodo than being forced to. Unfortunately for FRAU Sofa, they were still stuck with their family. Who hired personal trainers for Sofa with their own NSR money along with restricted their allowance and food intake (basically starving Sofa) to try and make them skinnier. Sofa ended up developing an eating disorder and started forcing themselves to puke to try and satisfy their family just so they would leave them alone. Sofa's family even started suggesting cosmetic surgery to try and "fix" Sofa's body for them, but thankfully Sofa has enough power to flat out deny those suggestions.

Dodo was never a talkative child even though he could respond physically to people perfectly fine. He was developing perfectly fine except for being non-verbal. His parents put him into speech therapy classes and tried to force him to talk, which he did end up doing even though he would get severe panic attacks out in public and have meltdowns that only further annoyed his parents. OG Dodo's parents ended up following the advice of someone who told them to enroll Dodo into sign language classes. They did but refused to learn sign languag, making Dodo still talk or at the very least write down what he was trying to say. It got to the point that Dodo just stopped trying to communicate with his parents (or anyone really) at all. It also didn't help that Dodo was into wearing dresses and skirt along with dancing. His parents tried to force him to stop but thankfully by the time they saw this part of Dodo he was joining the Sayu Crew and was able to leave his family.

FRAU Dodo was the same up until his parents' taking someone's advice. Instead of putting him in sign language classes he was forced to get a surgery for a new voice because his parents thought his voice was wrong. It didn't help Dodo to voluntarily keep talking, but it did give his parents the ability to guilt him into talking since they "spent so much money trying to fix him" that he just forced himself to talk. Especially once he overheard them thinking about doing another surgery on his brain to see if that would "fix" him. It was technically easier for him to physically talk but the mental aspect of it just really hurt Dodo. By the time he joined the Crew he was too afraid to ever truly express himself because his parents were willing to basically lobotomize Dodo in the hopes of getting rid of anything they deemed abnormal.

Remi's story is the most different out of the Crew compared from OG to FRAU. Both Remis' fathers had Eve with one woman and then Remi with another. OG Remi lived with his parents with Eve coming to visit her father almost every weekend and some holidays (she was 12 when he was born). The two were able to grow a pretty good relationship, especially when Remi started showing signs of liking art like Eve. Once Eve went off to college she saw less of Remi but was still a supporter for him. Once Remi joined NSR he also came out as trans to friends and family, which his mother heavily disapproved of and tried to kick Remi out while his dad was trying to tell Remi that he wasn't a guy. Thankfully Eve was able to help him out, made sure he got away from that environment, and even helped the rest of the Crew get away from their toxic families. She set them up in a big apartment and helped each of them get situated into their new lives.

FRAU Remi on the other hand did not have Eve to help him. Eve only ever came around on very select holidays. She only saw Remi like once or twice a year, and when she visited she was basically being forced to go which only soured her mood and made it difficult for the two of them to form any kind of meaningful bond. Once she left for college Remi never saw her again until he joined NSR, other than, you know, seeing her on the TV which pushed him to try and follow her footsteps. So he worked very hard to try and hone his artistic skills to try and be a graphic designer for NSR. His parents told him to not hold his breath because he won't make it far considering Eve is so much better than him and he shouldn't be looking for handouts from his half-sister (which he wasn't, he just wanted to follow her footsteps).

Once he became friends with the Crew and they made Sayu, they were able to join NSR but not get away from their families. Remi tried coming out as trans, but quickly realized that was a mistake as his parents disapproved and even tried to hit him. They almost forced him to quit NSR because it was "obvious that the fame was messing with Remi's head" but Remi was able to persuade his parents (with money) to let him keep working and stay with his friends. He even promised to never talk about being trans again and admitted he was a girl and would never try to be a guy. That was the only way he was able to still stay onboard as Sayu's lead designer. Thankfully the Crew respects Remi but they've had a few close calls of almost using masculine pronouns for him while in the presence of his family.

For Neon J, his childhood and life basically hinges off of one decision he decided to make which drastically changes the outcome of his and many other people's lives. Firstly though, let me talk about his life in both OG and FRAU before the change.

Neon used to have an older brother (by a few years, maybe 3) who he looked up to. They were very close and did everything together. As they grew up, his brother started showing interest in boys. The parents disapproved and would yell and scream at Neon's brother. They would belittle and embarrass him for years, making his life a living hell and trying (but failing) to get Neon to join in on hurting his brother. They were trying to "force the gay out" of Neon's brother. It all boiled over to the point that Neon found his brother dead in the closet after coming home from dance practice one day. His brother had killed himself from years of abuse and self hatred. Everyone was devastated. Even the parents because in their eyes, they were just doing what they could to "fix" their son.

As both OG and FRAU Neon started to become teenagers, they started to realize they liked girls. Both were obviously terrified to even try and talk to their parents, but this is where the change takes place.

OG Neon hid this side from his parents. Pushing them away and never opening up to them (they had suspicions but never really found out). He let his anger for himself and his parents fill him. Taking it out on other students who messed with him or his small group of friends. He started going out with his friends more, partying and drinking to try and mask the pain he was feeling. Experimenting with different substances and people. Even racking up a reputation for being a whore in his school. While all of this was happening, he was also making music with his friends, to the point they were able to go to a Lights Up audition as 15-16 year olds. They lost, and were humiliated by the judges only triggering Neon's anger more.

He ended up in a fight with his parents about his behavior where he stormed out of the house and picked his friends up in a car (his or his parents', doesn't matter). The group went out drinking and partying, trying to forget their worries and pain. Only for Neon to swerve while driving and hit a tree. Two of his friends died that night, and another was put into a coma. He was the only one to not be severely hurt (his chest was all torn up from his seat belt, but he was alive). After recovering, his parents were able to settle things behind the scenes with the other families (who were not as angry as they should have been since they could not give two shits about their kids, one family was even happy to be rid of their burden). Neon ended up just leaving his family at 16, dropping out of high school, and going to work as an apprentice toy maker until he decided to join the navy. He would never talk to his parents again, but he would tell his wife Martha about them and she would go to them out of desperation years after their divorce to escape an abusive relationship.

For FRAU Neon J, instead of hiding himself away from his parents, he decided to just tell them he liked women, but he also liked men! He came out because he didn't think he could ever fully hide this part of himself and was afraid to make things worse if he got caught later on. And his parents... they accepted him. As best as they could, they accepted Neon because they did not want to lose another child and regretted what they did to his brother. They saw this as a second chance to do what was right and support their kid. Because of this, Neon never pushed himself heavily into rock/music as an outlet and so he and his friends never went to the Light Up audition. They never started drinking or doing drugs because there was a safe place for all of them now. If any of Neon's friends needed a place to stay for the night, they had him and his family.

On the night that OG Neon and his parents had a fight and went out partying, FRAU Neon was home with his parents. He had declined an invitation to go out with his friends so he could work on homework, or some music, or dance, just something that kept him in that night. And the next day he woke to the television talking about a hate crime that killed a lot of people at a local gay club. Neon's friends were out there that night and were some of the victims of the attack. None of them survived and Neon felt distraught at the fact he could have offered them to come over to his house that night and possibly save them from this horrible fate.

In the end, FRAU Neon went on with his life, leaving home when he graduated high school and went to work as a candy maker. He dabbled in toy making a bit, and fixed machines that he worked with. He also ended up getting top surgery at some point (OG Neon's car accident gave him a make-shift top surgery that the surgeons had to clean up. They were going to reconstruct his breast but Neon never got that far into the healing process). He joined the navy a year or two after OG Neon. He still keeps in touch with his parents at times (less so after building 1010 and joining NSR), so does Martha as she had met them during their marriage and they still see her as a daughter-in-law even after the divorce.

[So yeah. That is "basically" the differences. Neon's life has such a high importance on the story of NSR. Just him not going to the Lights Up Audition with his friends is what leads to Tatiana being the way she is. And probably why the Sayu Crew's family is the way they are, as FRAU Neon joining the navy later actually leads to an extra year or two of wartime.]

[squinkoblinko]

Heavy commission I finally finished up!

[paintedcrows]

Human Bill! I wanna put him in a microwave

Bonus-ish: Really liked the flats on this one!

[suntails]

⚔️🐬

[softpine]

she's looking especially sacrificial lamb today 🥩

[god-i-hope-so]

Hmmm Tommy and Buck get ambushed by some gang members who want their car. They try to talk their way out of it but they end up being kidnapped by the gang.

Tommy switches to full military mode because this is about survival now and protecting Buck. But he also knows Buck is not a damsel in distress and he trusts him to play his part in whatever they will have to do to survive.

And because angst is one of my favorite food: Buck intentionally kills for the first time, for survival. It's a new trauma but it also puts many things into perspective in his life, especially regarding his past.

[gracefireheart]

Made a little fanfic about how Heavy and Medic's first interaction in my TF2 x Beastars AU went down.

If you don't know what Beastars is, I recommend watching at least a little of the anime to get a feel for it (tho' some of the things I mention in the fic will reference certain things that's shown in season 2, so be warned ig). It's on Netflix, but you can also just pirate it if you don't have a subscription. You didn't hear it from me tho' :)

Anyways, onto the fanfic below the keep reading line. It's over 3k words long, and 'cause of that (and how I don't have an a03 account), I'll just use pics instead for what I wrote in order to not go over the character limit :]

[aprofessionalwithoutstandards]

Thinking abt tf2's comedy writing and character dynamics bear with me... all three canon "pairs" of characters - Medic and Heavy, Soldier, and Demo, Sniper and Spy - have a similar dynamic, a wacky comedic character and a more "straight-man" type of character. Medic and Heavy are probably the example of this people are most familiar with reading and writing this way, but I can argue the case for the other two too! Medic probably does the most absurd things out of any tf2 character, while Heavy is considered one of the most down-to-earth members of the cast and serves to "ground" Medic in reality a little bit; the best example of this in the main comic is, of course, the baboon pregnancy bit, and I would also consider all their dialogue in Meet the Medic to be very representative of this dynamic. People tend to characterize Demo as basically like. "Soldier 2" which I think is slightly accurate but not completely representative of him! While Demo is a very Big personality, very memorable, very bombastic (lol), he DEFINITELY works to ground Soldier if only in that he's actually smart. In the main comic, we see this when Demo is reassuring Soldier he won't be fooled by his civilian disguise, and in the update comics I think this is best shown in the WAR! comic, where Demo has his life together and has a nice ass house and is taking care of his mom n everything, while Soldier is living in the dark surrounded by army surplus tomato soup and boxes from The Rib Place. Now I know Sniper and Spy are going to be a hard sell, because Sniper is not as outwardly Wacky or Silly a character as Medic or Soldier, however he's pretty obviously grounded by Spy in the same way Heavy and Demo ground their partners. Spy is so uptight he's basically begging to be a comedic straight-man, and his repeated displays of disgust towards Sniper's more outlandish and comedic behavior gives him that outlet. Jarate is the most obvious example of this being their dynamic, but I also think the part in the comic where Spy is exceedingly disgusted by Sniper's nudity and yet refuses to give up his very expensive suit jacket counts towards this (in general, having a clothed character react strongly to a naked character's nudity is what keeps the repeated use of nudity in the tf2 comics funny, imo). Theirs is a liiiittle bit different tho, since in the process of "grounding" Sniper, Spy is also performing one of his own signature jokes (thinking he's hot fuckin shit when he's really no better shakes than anyone else in his situation)

[tootditoot]

How a Ship having passed the Line was driven by storms to the cold Country towards the South Pole; and how from thence she made her course to the tropical Latitude of the Great Pacific Ocean; and of the strange things that befell; and in what manner the Ancyent Marinere came back to his own Country.

—Samuel Taylor Coleridge, “The Rime of the Ancient Mariner”

Here's this version with a little pirate on the prow!

[robo-dino-puppy]

horizon forbidden west | erend 32/?

[swinging-stars-from-satellites]

actually I think the thing about being a youth leader is that 25% of it is teaching about God, 25% is playing fun games, and more than that though 50% of it is making a safe space for kids to be. not to try and make them believe, not so they'll be open or anything. just. a 100% no stakes, safe place for them to just BE. whatever else comes after that. and I don't just mean physically safe, two-adults-in-the-room-at-all-times, et cetera. I mean emotionally safe. I mean not hitting them over the head with scripture, not trying to help them feel better or any particular way. just... a no-judgment, emotionally safe place to exist as kids.

[icewindandboringhorror]

sometimes looking at like Self Help Strategies lists for the symptoms I'm having is always just like:

thing that I already do

thing I have tried 10 times

thing I already do

thing that I don't have the money to do

thing I already do

thing I've been doing since I was 10yrs old to no avail

thing that is impossible given my situation

thing that doesn't apply to me

thing that I already do

thing I have already tried

hrmm, oh wait, maybe finally- OH, yeah.. okay. thing that I already do but it was just phrased slightly differently

thing I have already done

[g8d]

tfw everyone in the system has like vaaastly different ideas about what reality fundamentally is and what it means to be

[doomstarmagician]

Well, what an honor it’s been to be of service to you all. If you like sentient stars who have lived for far too long, but can’t quite take death’s hand just yet, or if you like ancient guardian spirits who have seen the worst of the worst and continue to move forward, or if you just like anomalies and enigmas who linger and lurk like a reaper, a manifestation of due accountability, then by all means… come to me.

[doubleedgemode]

that post u made about A.B.A regarding her classic GG quotes is so interesting I had no idea she said that! I haven’t played the earlier games, would u happen to have screenshots of where she says that or where I might be able to see some of her classic/unused quotes ? I just like having that stuff on hand lol. Thank you!

Thanks to you, anon, for making me revisit the screenshots, and sure thing! I'm gonna link the page, keep in mind it's super meaty and covers a lot of characters so ctrl F search will be your best friend to find specific character/quotes :)

I found them in this big quote compilation in guiltygear.ru, click the sentence to go there. (Kudos to @/solradguy's big gg neo.cities archival efforts making me find the page)... BUT before anything, important DISCLAIMERS❗:

1. Some of the quotes in general can get kind of explicit or with double entendres so uh keep that in mind.

2. Something I just learnt after going to find you the translations, it's to keep in mind their author: See, this is better explained in the aforementioned ne.ocities archival, but a lot of the site's translations were made by someone who, without going too much into detail, is... a controversial member of the community, who is known for putting a good bunch of misconceptions and mistakes into their translations. (Also they have, in my opinion, unsavory and even problematic takes about the franchise. Don't try to argue with them, just block, per proper net etiquette) I don't know japanese so I don't know if this quote index suffers from that so in the end, we'll have to take all this quote info with a huge grain of salt.

Keeping all this in mind, this is already probably a wordier answer than you expected BUT since we are at it, I'll ramble about some A.B.A quotes (in no order) that I found interesting about the topic under the cut, if you want to read that.

First and third quotes in this picture are pretty self explanatory about this part of her character. The vs Faust intro... Man, that looks straight out of her strive song. Dunno if they pulled inspiration from that, but it seems even in the classic days they had a pretty clear idea of part of A.B.A's story being existing and thriving in her own unique way.. Which makes me kind of emotional for some reason ;_;

These were NOT unused as far as I can tell, but obviously do correct me if wrong!

I find it fascinating how much of clear glimpses these are are into her law obsession (more on that specific one later) and believing herself to be a high class person and looking above "lower classes" shoulders.

Some of these aren't exclusively about the aforementioned topics but they mention her cooking god knows what creatures (like in that one infamous xxac ending) and just.. being a scared, pathetic individual at heart. Sigh.

There are probably more examples of all this but this post needs to end sometime today.😭 So, returning to her law thing being an obsession in capital letters, look at her ingame overdrives:

But before that, the elephant in the room: People's observations of her instakill looking pretty taxing to her to perform and even making a berserk Paracelsus look like even he thinks this goes too far are not far from the truth. "I might not recover this time... Dying!!!" What else can I say, that's just sad.. and very interesting lorewise about the toll of this kind of summonings. Yeah, people noticed that in strive, she can summon the same exact door as in her insta with no struggle (or at least not the same level for sure) indicates her power or skill have improved which is so so fascinating.. Anyways. Back to the law thing. We've always had a huge sign under our noses: Her saying Evidence in her overdrives. While sure it can be evidence in a more general meaning, like proving facts or something, it does call to LEGAL evidence, too

...Maybe that was super obvious for everybodh but I'm afraid to admit I didn't connect the dots til now haha 😅

I cannot access my xxacp copy right now to see if her saying shouko during her overdrives is correct, but were we to take this as truth and also trust a japanese language study site as solid because. Again I have zero knowledge of japanese... According to Nihongoclassroom..

It can be used in a legal setting.

And with this we can neatly wrap this up... Tdlr I guess she's living up to her creator being a mansion owner (which isn't precisely cheap) and it gets so interesting and double edged (HAH) if you believe her classic games was as self aware while doing this and fooling herself as strive A.B.A is.

AND she has or had a HUGE interest in law (and if u allow me to reach mayyybe morality too?). While probably not as core to her as her key thing, she sure has told the audience almost as much as it.

[cursezoroark]

he has a constant :3 which i think is very charming

(@aaronieros for rq, i went over little doodle cause i got ideas)