#there arent any specific lines from this song that jump out

[strawberri-syrup]

hihi!!

maple syrup // the backseat lovers

Your purple sweater's sitting in my room I tried to wear it, but I knew that it would smell like you

[thrallsnpuppets]

Ramble

One of the stranger (but relevant) thoughts i have had within the last couple weeks pertains to my birth country, the US.

In the next few years, my husband and i may be given the opportunity to one day move countries for his work. To me this is great.

My husband is a humble, born and bred, small town Texan with an extreme work ethic and homebody life preferences so the prospect of picking up everything and moving thousands of miles away to an unknown land filled with unknown possibly hostile people is terrifying. He literally lives about 50 miles from where he was born and raised and has never been without his immediate family. And contrary to his upbringing, hes decently progressive.

I live in Texas with him. However, I was born 2000 miles away in California. Those of you who are unfmailiar with the states and the culture, crossing state lines is both changing climate and time zone. If we can rightly agree that countries like Portugal and Spain have their differences than we can agree that Texans and Californians have a butt load of cultural differences as well.

One thing that is consistent is the the conditioned sense of Nationalism on both a federal and state level. Both CA and TX like lording their superiority as a state over the other and will bail out on any accountability when it comes to federal matters.

So, encroaching on that mentality that was only spun off different due to dialect has given me a decent understanding of what i could expect in culture shock when moving.

There is a marginal language barrier between Texas and California most pertaining to the specifics of slang and grammatical usage. (I went to speech class as a child due to health issues so i sound odd in both states.) When californians get worked up their words are replaced with expressions that i can equate to real life emojis that are just over the top comical in many situations. Where as a worked up texan loses any sort of hard consonants and theybextend their vowels to the point of running their sentences into one great grumbly affectation that can be about as intimidating as a hackles-up cattle dog. Watching californians argue with texans over Facebook pales to what it looks like real life. The californians are dancing around making expressions and exaggerated movements while the texans stick their chin out with a snarl hanging on their sunburnt and chapped lips. (My mom is from New Jersey, throw a new jersian in with the two mentioned and both the Texan and the Californian clam up momentarily. Californians are loud but like a song bird. Texans are quiet like a resting steam engine. New Jersians... They have all the fan fare and volume of a crowded stadium.)

I greatly digressed. I was only trying to highlight differences in state to state culture and got wrapped up in my own imagery.

Point is, there are major differences and not just in dialect and composure. If anyone has been paying attention to politics, youd know that the states can be very outspoken about their epitomized policies.

I havent been out of the country (would love to if warfare isnt eminent) and these opportunities i will be given has given me time to consider that. My husbands job owns places around the world so i have quite a bit of locations to think about.

I have always wanted to tour so many countries in both hemispheres but i haven't ever thought about residency.

So, i have been bouncing these ideas and potential opportunities off some of my family members and friends. Somenof my friends love the idea of getting that opportunity and would jump at the chance of leaving their bumpkin texas hometown to find themselves on foreign coasts (except the combat vets. Most are happy to be home). While some of the older people have their very nation oriented opinions.

My mom (a moderate and conspiracy theorist from new jersey) wants to move with me if i end up in places like Germany or New Zealand or France or Ireland. My mother in law (avid trump supporter and die hard texan) has an axe to grind against most of the world.

Ive always wanted to see Germany, ireland, italy, places in east europe ya know, lands of my ancestry. And perhaps to get away from the Nationalistic ideals of the United States. I went to a private school up until about middle school and grew up with out having to recite the pledge of allegiance or honoring the national anthem. (I Was startled when everyone stood at once for the pledge of allegiance when i transferred to a public school) So my sense of nation is askewed and find myself speaking against the bipartisan policies and many legislatures much to my inlaws and extended family's chagrin.

If you have ever met a Trump supporter, then you understand that their sense of nationalism is the strongest (not in a good way). They Are the ones that say, "this is our country. This is our flag. This is our president. Deal with it." But they are also offended when you mention moving countries to not be a resident of the US (especially if you just mutter about Germany lol). Which makes no sense to me but they (and current politics or regimes) make barely any sense most of the time anyways. To me anyways...

Arent they the ones that scream at an immigrant to go back to their own country if they dont like the US? Rhetorical; answer is yes always.

I dont understand why I was attacked for relating to the sentiment of picking up everything and leaving the country in pursuit of a fruitful and fulfilling life even if is thousands of miles away.

I have done it before. Not changing countries... But I have bust through state lines with bare minimal possessions escaping what i experienced in my home state to find happiness in another. I have encountered extreme hostility just for being from one of 'those' states in the great state of Texas. I already have moved thousands of miles from everything i knew to be in an unfamiliar land amongst possibly hostile people.

Why cant i, again, say i dont like it here im going somewhere else? (Other than finances and unavailable opportunity at the moment) Why cant i move again? Else where? Far away?

I have never anticipated encountering such animosity for these desires until recently when nationalism became the predominant mindset of the people. Before that, i remember expressing my desire to see the world and being praised for having worldly aspirations.

Turns out, not many people (texan or californian or new jersian) like it when you say i dont like [state, US, politician, policy, etc.] So im leaving/supporting another. I know it seems blatant but i guess I was just naive.

Isnt leaving what you told me i should do if I don't like how it is? I want to be able to contribute to something and experience opportunity in a place that would allow for it and have the resources to maintain these solutions and goals.

Im not saying it is in any one place in particular im just saying it doesn't seem like its here where i am now. A bad situation. I will probably get the opportunity for improvement in the next coming years.

But im a "white american". Does this make a difference in my immigration status? In my residencies? In my opinions? In other people's opinions? Yes, it seems so...

Its why i cant blame people for leaving their homes and travelling thousands of miles away to find a better opportunity for themselves and their family.

I would jump at the chance too.

Go ahead. Call me names. I already get torn at for carrying sympathy for those who desire to leave and improve their lives. I share the same desires even if the reasons differ greatly.