#there was a lot of yelling during this rewatch

[jumpscaregoose]

I finished the Shaman King again

loserbrain thoughts under cut because it's me and shaman king and I am very Normal about it (also spoilers duh but you probably already know them all)

so ya boi rewatched shaman king this past month or so.

realized I'd never actually done that (I'd rewatched it with friends or went through my favourite episodes but I'd never went through it again start to finish). I told myself no skipsies but I broke that rule almost immediately and I did skip some parts (sorry episode eight you're just boring to me).

anyways my general thoughts

I appreciate this silly little ghost show more every time I watch it it's just really good. my enjoyment has not decreased in the slightest. found myself understanding some parts I thought were lackluster before because for like a year I was a dumbass and didn't get that It's a Metaphor, You Idiot. the text literally spells out "this is a metaphor for a person's mindset and strength of will" like every 3 seconds and I just. ignored it I guess??? turns out a lot of stuff makes more sense if you look at it less like smashing two action figures together and more as mushy brain stuff. who could have ever possibly guessed that (not past me). thought it was overall very very good and its lackluster parts (random aliens a la midichlorians I'm looking at you) were made up for by its great parts (basically everything else).

went into the last episode to try and iron out my thoughts on the ending (went from hating it on my first watch to tolerating it on subsequent watches) and I think it is consistently decent. could have used some more episodes and is just really confusing if you're not a pathetic loser nerd who can Well Actually it. I like it a lil bit. thought I'd reconciled my feelings about renmei to "my god that could have been so good we were ROBBED if they'd explained how this HAPPENED it would have been SO GOOD" but now it's "the same thing as before except I'm angry and yelling now" because it's true renmei could have been great and I mourn the loss of that every day. episode 51 remains the best episode (despite the midichlorian aliens) purely for the hao awakening scene. episode 50 is fun because major character revelation 2 episodes before the end and I think that's Neat (affectionate).

telling you all that one time a while back I watched the Bear Episode and wanted to fact check if there would actually be bears there and I asked my friends who live in Colorado and they thought I didn't think bears lived in Colorado.

FINALLY figured out all the symbolism behind the training in hell arc. have had a theory that the scenery represented Funky Brain Stuff™ but just. couldn't. understand. joco's part. sat down and thought about it for a bit and realized I forgot that the themes of Dante's Divine Comedy (Rodin's Gates of Hell is there and all) where the same as those happening for that part of the story and focused on the floating islands for eight months like an idiot. should probably make another post with my interpretations of hell stuff because I'm fairly confident I get it and also it's cool.

appreciate hao even more after this rewatch he's an excellent antagonist and also my precious meow meow. will not elaborate go read this.

ost does funky stuff with leitmotif sometimes but also I like it

generally forgot that I actually like quite a bit of early shaman king. my brain defaulted to episode six is fantastic and forgot about the rest. it's very nostalgic to me which is weird because I first watched it last year but it's true don't fight me I'll win.

top ten episodes for me are 51, 40, 6, 15, 45, 9, 50, 47, 27, 2 (most favourite first, with no bias towards anyone at ALL).

shaman king really good me really likey

might actually watch the 2001 version if pleaded with (it is my archnemesis)

[clairewritesandrambles]

Currently watching Twisters with headphones and subtitles (as it should be experienced). If you had a hard time hearing some of the quieter dialogue like me, here is a list of little details I didn't notice the first time:

Scott's driver tells to Boone to blow him when the Tornado Wranglers arrive at the first gas station.

Ben telling Tyler to keep his eyes on the road when he is staring at Kate as she and Javi pass them.

As Boone is hanging out the window loading rockets, he sings 'Dead End Road' by Jellyroll and then when the camera pans out he yells "SING IT BEN!" (Honestly this rewatch caught a lot of background dialogue for him, made me love Boone even more).

The cause of the broken trigger during the second tornado is melted chocolate and Tyler is lecturing Boone about eating chocolate in the truck.

In the background after the Stillwater tornado you can see the StormPAR guys digging the truck out of the wreck of the motel. (Still find it hilarious that it survived, considering we see a - slightly smaller - truck get sucked straight into the tornado in the same area).

Scott 100% calls Riggs his uncle. I already was pretty sure that was what he said, but subtitles confirmed it.

You can barely hear the dialogue, but the entire time during the EF5 that hits El Reno Scott is the one talking in the truck with Javi. It's all super quiet because of the music and sound of the tornado, but throughout the entire thing it is Scott who is showing fear and Javi is the calmer one (while still being realistic for the scene). I think it just adds an interesting take on how calm he is later and wanting to go back to the tornado. Maybe a bit of a pride thing?

Not so much something that I *just* noticed, but I find the inconsistency with Tyler's truck damage at the end hilarious. The thing just got rolled by an EF5 and a few days later (StormPAR truck is still covered in mud, so it can't be a big time gap) it seems fine at the airport. I can totally see him being the type of guy who would absolutely run it to the mechanic as soon as possible, that is HIS BABY.

This has been Live Watching with Claire.

[girlbeyondthegrave]

I Watched Beetlejuice Beetlejuice a Third Time: More Things I Noticed

Here’s my previous list for those that haven’t read it. Enjoy!

A lot of people on this post I made thought that the dog in the MacArthur Park sequence was Taco from the Ghosthouse segment where Beetlejuice appears in the audience. I am sad to report this is not the case. Taco is a chihuahua, and the dog that appears is more of a terrier. However, some people on Reddit wonder if the dog is the one that ran out in front of the Maitlands’ car and killed them. I haven’t rewatched the first movie yet to check.

When Beetlejuice stitches Lydia’s mouth shut, she’s more exasperated than afraid. She literally tries to yell, “COME ON!”

Beetlejuice looks so offended on Lydia’s behalf when Rory calls her codependent. Like, “Is he serious right now? Get him, babe!”

Beetlejuice appearing before Delia can finish summoning him furthers the eavesdropping theory I made in my earlier post, and if we go off that theory, we can explain by Beetlejuice wasn’t that bothered by being summoned away at the wedding. He’s overheard Lydia’s desire to take her relationships slow and her reluctance to marriage. (Which is most definitely because of him and the fact that the last living person she loved tragically died—even if their relationship was over before that point.)

In the film, Beetlejuice is the ONLY person that agrees to help Delia find Charles, which we see her do at the end of the movie. This means that Beetlejuice kept his word and helped Delia, and he didn’t keep her away from Charles after the wedding fell through.

“MacArthur Park” plays when the studio intros roll, during the wedding sequence, and the end credits—three times when we have three different iterations of Beetlejuice and Lydia’s dynamic, fun fact. This is meant to be their song, and although the song is about a doomed relationship, this part sticks out to me: “After all the loves of my life / You’ll still be the one.” It doesn’t matter if Beetlejuice gets the timing right. It doesn’t matter if Lydia marries him. He considers her “the one.” He’s always going to wait for her, as conveyed by “Right Here Waiting.”

Astrid opens pages about violation 699 and summoning sandworms via trapdoors. I understand that was meant to “foreshadow” later events and explain why she knew how to do those things, but the terms for 699 are barely on-screen, so it’s hard to catch the part where it lays out how bringing Lydia illegally into the afterlife makes her contract null and void.

When Delores appears at the church, there’s a huge gust of wind, and the Handbook moves, but NOTHING ELSE MOVES with that precision until Delores moves Lydia away from the altar. This is kind of a stretch, but I personally think it’s possible that Beetlejuice saw Delores, and he purposefully sent the book in Astrid’s direction. If we go off my eavesdropping theory, he clearly knows Astrid is a smart girl. Plus, he stopped her from getting to the book earlier, so he knows it’s a threat.

When Beetlejuice has a dramatic entrance or exit, it’s very intentional. He does a whole dramatic couple’s therapy bit for Lydia and Rory. He does the earthquake through the model with a slow rise from the smoke. But we’ve also seen him appear in straightforward ways, too, like how he appears randomly to spook Delia. Beetlejuice controls his entrances and exits, and so his dramatic exit at the end is intentional. He allows Lydia to send him away. He makes a big show of it. Lydia has been manipulated by Rory for years. He’s tried to control her and stifle her. When Beetlejuice lets Lydia send him away and makes a big show of it, he’s demonstrating the amount of control he’s giving to Lydia. He goes because SHE wants him to, not because he can’t stop her from saying his name.

(Editing to say that this post confirms the dog is Tim’s dog.)

[aimseytv]

this isnt an ask just a ramble i needed to get out about au sunship, i've never had tumblr before and im running on little sleep so this isnt going to be very coherent

But like the parallel between when guqqie felt guilty about getting aimsey to lie because they didn’t want acho to see them differently/yell at them vs aimsey getting angry that guqqie told michella about what hera did because aimsey didn’t want anyone to see guqqie negatively and yell at her (i can’t phrase things right) THESE SCENCES ARENT SIMILAR BUT THEY REMIND ME OF EACHOTHER SO MUCH LIKE KIND OF FORESHADOWING??

AIMSEY SAYING

“other people’s opinions… aren’t something we can control, ….. you need to not worry about what other people think of me…”

Guqqie “people shouldn’t judge you based on one action… i just want people to see that your good”

“…i just don’t think you should be so worried about the way people are gonna perceive me because at the end of the day their thoughts don’t really matter” 

and guqqie being like “they matter to me i want everyone to like you cause your great” 

“as long as you like me then i’m okay”

And this scene isn’t made like a very big deal but like it does matter obviously and then later after mr. loverman (before they see guqqs for the first time) aimsey doesn’t think guqqs likes it anymore and so like they feel like what everyone else always thought of him guqqie also thinks of him now (“youre just a demon”)

and then during the wall scene when aimsey is like did you tell michella and guqqies like yeah and aimseys upset because like 

“i didn’t want people to see you in the wrong way, guqqie!” 

“that’s not up to you!”

“yes it is! …..  i didn’t want people to see you the same way they saw me! i didn’t want it. i didn’t want it anymore. and i just didn’t want people to start making up these things and painting you in a terrible light-

people expect these things of me and they expect me to be this bad thing and i just didn’t want that to happen to you. i just didn’t want it ok…

if i told people that you beat me do you genuinely think people would just look at you and they would think that everything’s ok? No, they wouldn’t guqqie! they would see you differently. and i didn’t want that okay! i just didn’t want that! i just wanted things to be okay…”

so we’ve kind of known this whole time that aimsey really does care about what others think of him but they didn’t quite let on to it when guqqie was talking to her about it but during the wall scene we really see how much others seeing aimsey in a negative light has affected it and how much he’s been hurt by it to the point where they’re genuinely terrified of guqqie also having to go through that!! and just!!! They announcement has made me rewatch a lot of the vods/the ausunshipduo movie and im brain rotting about them but no one I know will listen to me ramble so i just needed this to go somewhere (sorry) ive reread this to see if it makes sense but my eyes hurt so idk if it does or not (im so sorry)

this is so sweet i read the entire thing :) glad you love ausmp gamer

[wandamaximoffsbadgirl]

Healing Bonds

Yelena Belova x Fem!Reader, Natasha Romanoff x Fem!Reader(Past)

Summary: You find Yelena after Natasha, your ex-lover, has passed and you feel like it's your duty to keep Yelena close. What happens though when feelings rise up for the blonde Russian?

Word Count: 3.2K

Warnings: Lots of angst and hurt

A/N: So This idea had come to me after rewatching Endgame, Black Widow, and Hawkeye so here you go.

The first time you met Yelena Belova wasn't until after her sister and your ex-lover, Natasha Romanoff, died. Natasha had always talked about Yelena and how much she loved her. You cried when you first laid eyes on Yelena. The two looked nothing alike, and you were thankful for that because you don't think you could look at her if she did.

When you told Yelena who you were to Natasha, she cried, wishing for a million different scenarios in which her sister was still here with them, and all you could do was hug Yelena, which earned you a handful of punches. You learned quickly that Yelena could be a very violent person when dealing with certain emotions. The first time it happened, you let it. You let her get her aggression out.

"It's not fair! You had so much time with her! You got to be happy with her! Me? I got a mission that almost got us killed after 20 years of silence!" She yelled, and you just held her tighter. "I'm sorry, Yelena," You whispered over and over and over.

In those moments, as her fists collided with your body, you could feel the pain in her words. It wasn't just about Natasha's death; it was about the years lost, the missions that tore them apart, and the void left by the silence between them. You understood Yelena's anger, even if it was directed at you. It wasn’t as if she could direct it at the person she wanted to.

As the punches subsided, she finally collapsed into your arms, exhausted from the emotional storm that had consumed her. You sat there in silence for a while, the weight of Natasha's absence hanging heavily between the two of you. The room felt colder, emptier, and you couldn't shake the guilt that gnawed at you.

"I wish she had more time with you too, Yelena," You said softly, your words barely audible. Yelena didn't respond, but her grip on you tightened, seeking solace in your shared grief.

In the aftermath of that turbulent encounter, the two of you began a journey of healing together. You were bound by the love you had both lost, and as the two of you navigated the tangled web of emotions, a new connection formed. A connection born out of pain, but one that held the promise of understanding and, perhaps, even redemption in the face of the losses you both endured in the wake of the Snap and beyond.

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You ended up taking Yelena home with you, offering her a permanent place by your side. She continued going on missions, which you had expected. The first time she left without telling you, and there was no note. You thought you'd lost her forever, sitting on the back porch in the summer evening air, your Y/H/C hair whipping around you as silent tears fell.

You didn't hear her come in, not until she was next to you did you notice her presence. "Why are you crying?" Her accent, thick and familiar, filled your ears as you grabbed her, pulling her in tightly, close, your heart hammering in your chest. "I thought I'd lost you too... don't... don't fucking do that again, Yelena!" You yelled at her, your voice trembling as tears flowed freely.

Yelena's expression softened as she held you, understanding the fear that gripped you during her absence. "I had to go. It was a last-minute mission, and I didn't want to wake you," she explained, her words a mix of apology and reassurance.

"It doesn't matter. Just... just tell me next time, please," You pleaded, your grip on her not loosening. The relief of having her back overwhelmed the anger that had fueled your outburst.

Yelena nodded, pressing a gentle kiss to the top of your head. "I promise. I'm sorry for making you worry," she said, her voice soothing. The two of you stayed there, entwined on the porch, the summer breeze carrying away the tension that had momentarily fractured your newfound connection.

From that day forward, Yelena kept her promise. She would leave for her missions, but not without a word or a note, ensuring that you wouldn't have to endure the heart-wrenching uncertainty of her absence again. In the quiet moments between her departures and returns, your bond deepened, and the scars of your shared losses began to heal, one mission at a time.

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You decided to form a company a little over a year after Natasha died, the weight of her absence still heavy in your heart. Standing at her grave, you whispered into the wind, "I'm going to start a company. I don't want to be an Avenger anymore. Not without you, but I can help others. I know I can." The breeze felt like Natasha's touch, a comforting caress that seemed to echo her approval.

"Yelena and I have been living together for six months now, Tasha. She's exactly as you described. A spitfire and a brat at times. I don't know if you can forgive me or not when I say this, but I could see myself with her. She's my type, a power bottom with a bratty side." You chuckled as the wind picked up. "Okay okay... I understand, only if she moves first," You whispered, as if seeking Natasha's consent in the elements around you.

Your company started up with few hiccups. You planned on making a business out of seeking out people with powers and talents that could be considered Avengers, teaming them up with a manager. Eventually, you aimed to expand to other countries, each with its own headquarters. The goal was to create a network of skilled individuals, ready to defend against threats on a global scale.

You envisioned a world where those of you left in America could stay here unless faced with a Thanos-level threat, something you fervently hoped would never happen again. The legacy of the Avengers would live on through this new venture, a tribute to Natasha and a commitment to protecting a world that had lost so much but still held the potential for hope and resilience.

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You come home to find Yelena sitting on the couch with a pot of mac & cheese covered in hot sauce, using a too-big spoon. "Y/N! I made mac & cheese! Would you like some?" she asks, and you’re too exhausted to yell at her. You sit next to her, taking the spoon and eating some. "How was your day?" she inquires.

"Stressful, Lena. More and more people are learning about my company, and we're getting more and more applications," You reply, leaning your head back against the couch, closing your eyes. You hear her set the pot down on the coffee table before she curls up against your side. "Anything I can do?" she asks.

You remind yourself of the promise you made to Natasha. "Whatever you think sounds good. You've known me for over a year now, Lena. What is it that you think I want? What will make me feel better?" You don't open your eyes or look at her. you’re testing her, and she knows it.

You feel her shift off the couch, and you clench your fists. She's never going to make the first move as you fiddle with the band on your ring finger—the one you haven't taken off since Natasha gave it to you.

Yelena returns with a blanket, draping it over both of you. "How about a movie night? We can just relax and take a break from all the chaos," she suggests, her voice soft. It's a simple gesture, but the warmth of her presence and the consideration behind her words start to ease the tension within you.

You nod, finally opening your eyes to meet hers. "Yeah, that sounds good, Lena," you admit, a small smile playing on your lips. Maybe in that moment, amidst the mac & cheese, the too-big spoon, and the movie night proposal, you found a way to let go, even if just for a little while.

Yelena picks the movie while you change into pajamas, a tank top and shorts. You notice her eyes on your body, but choose to ignore it for the time being as you make popcorn and pour us some vodka sprites. Carrying the drinks and popcorn over, Yelena has picked out John Wick. You can’t help but chuckle at the choice as you settle back into the couch. Yelena moves closer, fitting into you like a puzzle piece as she takes your left arm and wrap it around her shoulders. You simply smile at the gesture, sipping on your drink and eating popcorn as the movie plays out.

About halfway through the movie, you feel Yelena absent-mindedly playing with the band Natasha had given you. She's engrossed in the movie, and you watch her, finding her reactions more enthralling than the movie at this point. It's a subtle touch, her fingers tracing the contours of the ring on your finger, and you can't help but be drawn to the way she navigates the emotions tied to Natasha's memory.

As the scenes of John Wick unfold on the screen, you lean your head against Yelena's, savoring the comfort of the moment. Her actions speak louder than any words, and in the quiet intimacy of that movie night, you start to understand that healing doesn't always come from grand gestures or elaborate plans. Sometimes, it's found in the simplicity of sharing a movie, a drink, and the touch of someone who cares. And in those stolen glances and unspoken connections, you find a new layer of solace, a fragile bridge between the past and the potential for a future where happiness is not just a memory but a living, breathing reality.

You whisper in Yelena's ear, "Tasha gave me the ring." Yelena is pulled from the movie, looking down at your hand that she's been playing with. "It was a promise ring. She got it for me in Budapest. Saying when things settled down, she'd do the whole down on one knee, and we'd have this beautiful wedding where she'd wear a black dress instead of a white one. Everyone would be there, and we'd go back to Budapest for our honeymoon. When we'd come back, we'd ask for a safe house where we could just live quietly between missions..."

You don't realize you’re crying until Yelena is wiping the tears from your face. "I'm sorry... I didn't... I'm ruining movie night, aren't I?" You choke on your own sobs, but Yelena just pulls you against her, hugging you tightly. "No, you haven't ruined anything, Y/N. It's okay."

You hold onto her, shifting slightly until she's in your lap, once again feeling like a puzzle piece as we bury our faces into each other's necks. "If you had gotten married, I hope she would have come found me to be her maid of honor... though I don't know how good I'd be at that," Yelena admits.

In that vulnerable moment, amidst the shared pain and unspoken understanding, Yelena's admission brings a bittersweet smile to your face. The weight of Natasha's absence still lingers, but in Yelena's presence, you find a different kind of strength—a strength born out of shared grief, compassion, and the subtle promise of moving forward, even if it's one tear-streaked movie night at a time.

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Yelena wakes you up, gently calling your name and crawling onto your bed. "Y/N... Y/N..." She speaks softly, shaking your arm lightly. In your half-awake form, you turn to face her, pulling her into a tight embrace, her face against your chest. You can smell her shampoo, pomegranates, and make a noise of content. "Y/N, I have to go," Yelena whispers.

"No," You refuse, not letting her go. In fact, you hold her a little tighter. "Yes, I must. The widows need me," she insists.

"I really don't want you to go... I worry so much every time you go out that door. I know you're the world's greatest assassin, but so was Natasha before you," You confess. Yelena cups your cheeks. "I'll come back. I promise."

Natasha said those exact words too. You feel the tears in your eyes, spilling over before I have a chance to stop them. They're down your cheeks and running over her fingers. "I know words mean very little. I know Nat said similar words. I'm not leaving, though. I'll come back. It's just freeing more widows that have been found. That's all. It's safe. I promise. None of them come close to my skills."

Yelena wipes your tears and assures you that she'll come back. You know you have to let her go. "Please just come back safe, Lena. Please," You lean your forehead against hers. "I can't do this without you," You finally confess.

"I'll come back. I'll always come back. You can't get rid of me, not anymore. You're too deep into this," Yelena tells you, and you look at her, searching her face. "Lena..." Gods, you want to kiss her so badly just to show her how much you need her, but you promised Tasha...

Yelena leans in, kissing your cheek, almost reaching your lips. It's the first time she's ever kissed you in any way. "I'll be back. A few days, that's all," she reassures, placing another kiss on your cheek before she leaves. She looks at you one last time with a smile before heading out, leaving you there, curled up into a ball and crying. Now, you definitely couldn’t lose her.

The weight of her absence already looms large, and the brief touch of her lips on your cheek lingers like a promise in the air. As you try to gather yourself, the echoes of Yelena's words and the warmth of her fleeting kiss become the anchor in the storm of your fears. You know you must trust her, just as Natasha had asked you to trust her own choices.

In the solitude of your room, you cling to the hope that Yelena will return, that the few days she's away won't stretch into an eternity. The scent of pomegranates still lingers in the air, a reminder of her presence, and you find solace in the belief that your connection, however fragile, will endure the challenges that lie ahead.

"Please tell me you'll count that as the first move, Tasha?" You ask, directing your words to the air as you look at the ring on your finger. There's a moment of silent contemplation, a silent conversation with a memory.

Then, you get up and get dressed, facing the day with a mix of vulnerability and determination. The echoes of Yelena's departure still resonate in your mind, but as you glance at the ring, you find a subtle strength. The journey ahead may be uncertain, but in that quiet acknowledgment, you feel the weight of a promise made, a connection forged, and a future that holds the potential for healing and new beginnings.

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"Yelena kissed my cheek; she almost kissed my lips, actually," You run your fingers across your cheek and the corner of your lip. "She had to go on a mission, and she told me the same words you did before you left me forever. I broke down. I seem to do that quite a bit with her now." You’re looking at Natasha's grave. It has been two years now since she left. "Tasha, I know we had our plans, and I will never forget them, but I want to move on... I need to, and in order to do that..." You pull the ring off your finger, twisting it between your fingers. "I need to give this back to you, darling." You’re trying not to choke on your tears as they flow freely down your face. You wrap it up in a little cloth, a red one, and bury it just a little ways down. "Please be happy for me, darling. You know she'll always treat me right." You are full-blown crying as you kiss her gravestone and head back home, hoping Yelena is finally home.

As you walk away, the weight of the past feels a bit lighter, as if the act of returning the ring is a step towards embracing the future. The pain is still there, the memories still vivid, but in the tears and the quiet goodbye, there's a sense of release and a tentative hope for what lies ahead. You head back home, your heart heavy but with a flicker of anticipation, hoping Yelena's absence will soon be replaced by her comforting presence.

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When Yelena comes back home, she finds you crying on the floor. She picks you up into her arms and holds you as you sob. When you finally come to from your crying session and register that she's back, you cup her cheeks and slam your lips against hers a little rougher than you intend. You soften up a bit when you realize how rough you truly were.

"You're back..." you whisper against her lips.

"I told you I'd be back," she whispers back, grabbing the back of your neck and pulling you back in. The two of you kiss, hungry and passionate, as if she's been waiting all her life for this moment. In the embrace of her arms, the pain of the past and the uncertainty of the future momentarily fade away. There's only the warmth of the present and the promise of a new chapter, where healing and love can coexist, a testament to the resilience of the heart after weathering the storms of loss.

"Yelena..." You pull back, leaning your forehead on hers.

"I've been waiting forever for that," Yelena admits.

"I know you were grieving, so I just wanted to be here for you, and I was never sure if I should act on my feelings," Yelena tells you, and you give her a soft, quick kiss this time.

"I talked with Tasha about it and promised I wouldn't make the first move," Yelena laughs. "When was this?" she questions.

"A year ago at her grave. You were on a mission, and I went to visit her just before starting up the Avengers company. I told her about how I was falling for you and to not hate me for it. The wind whipped around me, and so I promised I wouldn't make the first move. When you kissed my cheek before leaving, I took that as you making the first move. I visited Natasha yesterday and told her about it and gave back her ring. I left it with her so that I could move forward," You explain, feeling a mixture of vulnerability and relief.

Yelena brushes her thumbs against your tear-stained cheeks and listens to your words. "I promise I'll live up to your expectations. I'll do everything I can to do right by you, Y/F/N," she says, and you chuckle at the use of your full name.

"I know you will, and so does Natasha. I don't think I could be in better hands than yours, Lena," You say, feeling a sense of acceptance and hope for the future. The weight of grief begins to lift, replaced by the promise of a new chapter, and the knowledge that love, even after loss, has the power to mend and rebuild.

[lovely-keii]

being their sibling

characters: tsukishima kei, oikawa tooru, suna rintarou

a/n: i write a fic every time i rewatch hq LOL sorry ik i said im abandoning this blog buuuut…happy bday to this blog!! (repost from 1/5 because tags broke :(( )

part 1

TSUKISHIMA KEI

looks out for you, but he can’t help that hes so emotionally constipated :’( he tries to give you advice because he genuinely is concerned for you but just is unable to word anything properly. see: “you need to stop talking to that person, you’re being a pushover,” but he just wants you to realize you’re letting people walk all over you.

god forbid he has to comfort you because hes the wrong brother for that - you’re definitely in better hands with akiteru. he might walk in on you crying and contemplate if he’ll even say anything or just ignore it flat out, or he’ll say something like “don’t cry, you look stupid.” if you cry more, he’ll end up swallowing his pride and sitting next to you. he’ll groan and reluctantly, “fine, spill it.”

other than that, he’s going to be a sneaky little prick. definitely the type to take revenge on you if you annoy him. you eat the last piece of chocolate he was saving and suddenly you find your charger hidden deep under your bed. also loves to take things without your permission. “why? i’m just using it, it’s not like you need it now.”

if someone picks a fight with you, he’ll be quick to extract you from the situation before saying something ruder and harsher than usual to the person. and if you tell him you like someone from his team, he’s going to look at you like you’re crazy. “are you insane?!” he’s honestly more bewildered than upset. doesn’t let you anywhere near the gym. he can make an exception for yamaguchi though. “at least it’s not hinata…or worse, kageyama.”

OIKAWA TOORU

your life is never boring with this guy as your brother. you’re literally being dragged everywhere, practices, shopping, team events… you’re like “i’m not even part of the team.” he goes “we can fix that!” and the next day you find out that you’re the manager for the boys’ volleyball team. huh, wonder how that happened.

oh my god, he MILKS you being his manager. “hold my drink, my fans are calling.” “y/n get my towel please.” you’re absolutely seething at the power trip that this guy is on. eventually, you start doing all that for his other team members and not for him, and he gets so whiney. “y/n you’ll get big ugly iwaizumi a towel but not your own sweet brother?!” that earns him a spike to the head from iwaizumi.

he tells you all the gossip about the school, because believe me, he knows A LOT of things. he’ll do his skin care while he forces you to listen to his gossip, cue him getting mad if you try to leave. everyone realizes why you two are siblings when you two walk down the halls and pull the exact same faces at the people he’s told you about in his gossip.

he makes you his little scapegoat for his fangirls. “oh, you want my number? you’ll have to ask y/n for that, they keep my phone with them during practice!” (you dont) “now, why don’t you girls hand all these gifts to my lovely sibling for me?” (you almost immediately chuck them at his face when you see him) but you know the best way to get back at him? when he sees you even slightly conversing with ushijima or kageyama, all hell breaks loose.

SUNA RINTAROU

the devil if the devil was your brother. he takes the ugliest pictures of you, when you’re asleep, when you’re yelling, when you’re crying over a movie. he also loves to send you pictures of animals and send a “look at you in this picture, so cute”. he also takes your things without asking and never returns it, you’ll just find it in his bag one day.

he also is one to order you around, and it drives you mad. “pass me the remote, y/n.” “but it’s nearer to you.” “i’ll tell mom that you-” // “y/n get me a drink from the vending machine.” “why would i do that” “remember when you snuck out and i-” // “get my bag too when you get yours.” “no.” “what i post that one picture of you when you’re about to sneeze-”

but he’s always looking out for you. when creeps try to approach you, he’s quick to react by shooting them a nasty glare. he’s a silent kind of care. standing behind you on elevators, walking on the outer side of the sidewalk, staying up late til you come home and just telling you he just couldnt sleep. little do you know, it’s something he’s always done even as a kid. putting more food on your lunch box, holding the corner of tables when you pick something up so you don’t hit your head, returning your things that are sprawled around the house to your room so you don’t lose them.

and if he ever finds you crying over some guy, he sighs and sits down next to you. “why’re you crying over an idiot?” he then makes snappy insults at the expense of the guy, making you laugh. “see? you look better like that. now stop crying and let me get some sleep.” he closes the light and shuts the door on his way out.

[cerebralisis]

Has Taylor been drawing connections to Barbie’s journey from Barbieland into the real world?

I rewatched Barbie a few days ago after streaming the Amsterdam N3 show and found some interesting parallels, particularly the scene where Barbie and Ken go through the transportation sequence.

Like Barbie and Ken, Taylor and Travis started their journey by setting off in the getaway car (a rather loud hint at how this whole thing is gonna end). Since then, Taylor has played Getaway Car twice - once in Melbourne mashed up with August and The Other Side of the Door, and again in Edinburgh mashed up with The Bolter - three more songs that reference cars.

Next, Barbie and Ken ride in the boat. I’m sure by now that most of us have seen the Taylor-Travis pap-walk on their way to a boat ride - with the chessboard sweater and the not-so-subtle AO3 shot in the background making everyone question if this is just a fanfic. Taylor also played the “murder mashup” which includes a song referencing a boating license and another song used in a movie where they boat through the marshes of North Carolina.

From the boat, Barbie and Ken move onto the rocket ship. This is substantially more challenging for them to recreate, but I did notice that there were a hefty amount of spaceship/rocket references throughout June. Most notably: a new merch drop featuring the Down Bad spaceship and lyrics; a TikTok from Ice Spice where she’s reading the WSJ issue featuring Karlie Kloss as a “Rocket Woman” that’s “suiting up at Spacex;” Kam yelling out “bolt ya rocket” during WANEGBT; and a timely insta post from Travis promoting the Accelerator Rocket Pop energy drink (while wearing a Ken wig?)

After that, Barbie and Ken ride bikes through a scene set with windmills in the background, which heavily implies the Netherlands. This is what caught my attention because - while Taylor was in the Netherlands for Amsterdam N3 - she sang imgonnagetyouback, which of course has the line about smashing up your bike. She then sits down at the piano and says “I mentioned bikes, and man do you love bikes in Amsterdam! You just see a bike rack with 3,000 bikes on it.” Then, Travis was papped riding a bike out in Amsterdam. All of this happened only a week after Travis told us on his podcast that he suggested riding out on stage on one of the Blank Space bikes (before Taylor came up with the idea to make him a circus handler instead).

Next in the sequence are a camper, snowmobile, and rollerblades, so we will have to keep an eye out and see if there are any related hints.

It wouldn’t be the first Barbie reference that Taylor has made. In addition to all her Ken lyrics, I’m convinced that Peter references the Barbie movie with the line: “I hoped you’d return with your feet on the ground, tell me all that you’ve learned.” To me this feels a lot like Barbie choosing the Birkenstock over the high heel so she can go to the real world and learn the secrets of the universe. Especially when contrasted with “in stilettos for miles” when Taylor is lamenting her misery during I Can Do It With a Broken Heart, as if she’s stuck in Barbieland.

What do you think? Am I just cherry-picking or does the transportation sequence seem like an intentional countdown? Given the themes of the Barbie movie, the connections are hard to miss.

[nytehavyn-circle]

My previous post set me on the course for this one:

There's one major thing I love about the TV show 'Castle.' One dynamic that is rarely seen in TV shows/movies of today...

Castle's family gets along.

They love each other. They aren't afraid to say it or show it.

Alexis gets along with her father, and he gets along with her. There's none of that stupid 'teenage angst' that's seen in almost every tv show. Alexis doesn't walk around saying 'You just wouldn't understand!' to Castle, she isn't unnecessarily mean to him, she doesn't ignore him, she doesn't roll her eyes at him, and she doesn't start fights with him. And she's never accused him on not loving her. She has never questioned her father, Richard Castle's, love for her. Because she knows she's loved. She gets along with Martha, her grandmother. They talk, they 'scheme,' they enjoy each other's company. They rarely fight or argue - they talk to one another. And Alexis listens to her father - for the most part. She knows what she can actually get away with and what she can't. She knows when she can't push the envelope. And when she screws up, she knows she did.

Castle loves his daughter and his mother. And they get along. Yes, granted, there's a little friction between Martha and Castle, but that's usually only because of Martha's tendency to be a little extra. But Castle still loves her, and she still loves him. They don't always say it, but it can be seen in action and deed, if not always words. They rarely fight - they argue a lot, but, once again, that's due to Martha's ability to be a little 'extra.' And, once again, Castle and his mother, Martha, talk. When it comes to Alexis, Castle tries to be a friend, but he's not afraid to be a father. The reason he rarely punishes Alexis is because he raised Alexis so well, that she doesn't often screw up. But Castle does call her out for it when she does. And she does the same to him - especially when he oversteps, even as a parent. But he allows her to set her own boundaries for herself, while still obeying him.

The Caste/Rodgers family loves each other. They don't often fight or argue, they don't yell and scream at one another, they don't name-call. They talk, they get along. They call each other out on their bullshit without getting mean. They are the antithesis to the redundant, typical TV family we're usually presented with.

I will ALWAYS love the Castle/Rodgers family dynamic because it's such a breath of fresh air from 'regular' TV families. Even during my rewatches of the show, I find myself enjoying watching the family interact, because of how they interact.

Does the family have problems? Of course they do, they're a family. But instead of losing their shit with each other, they talk through those problems.

And that's the key - they talk.

[pencileraser1]

things i noticed/thoughts about most recent rewatches of dps (plus laserdisk deleted scenes):

whenever theres a group scene i've started watching the characters that the story isn't focusing on to see what they do and i've been having a fun time with that. pitts and cameron specifically seem to almost always be doing something interesting in the background.

hopkins!!!! my favorite minor character who somehow got character development despite having like 2 lines!!!! the last guy to stand on the desk but he did it!!!

sometimes i do like to think about what the rest of the students thought about the dead poets society, esp in alternate timeline neil lives dps keeps meeting universe. like yeah theres this guy in their class whose one of the most credited students in the school and we think he maybe started a cult. idk though. but that group runs out into the woods every few days to do god knows what and one of them keeps talking about "dead poets honor" whatever that means and holy shit welton star student neil perry started a cult.

i watched the movie with headphones. and maybe it's because ive seen this movie Far too many times and mabe i'm listening too hard but it was Really obvious sometimes when audio was added in post production. llke in the sweaty toothed madman scene when you can hear laughing and to be fair the camera is behind their heads. but it does Not look like anyone's laughing. my favorite is at the end of the phone call to chris scene where knox is like i'm gonna seize the day!! and runs up the stairs and the poets are cheering him on and neil is sort of yelling "carpe!!!!" and i could be wrong but i'm like 75% certain that the person singing is Also rsl so now neil is just speaking two times at once somehow. anyways it didn't ruin the experience for me or anything it was maybe just a little bit funny to notice but very sorry if this did ruin anyone's viewing.

people talk a lot about how rsl and ethan hawke really made their characters what they are but i have to add dylan kussman to that list. I get the impression that older versions of the movie didn't really give as much depth to cameron and watching dylan kussmans performance is like. he Knew who his character was so fucking well and it shows!! like the deleted scene of them getting clubs assigned. like i could tell So Much about cameron from that scene

for how little she actually appeared, there is an emphasis put on the fact that neil's mom smokes pretty frequently. and i think that's interesting considering neil is one of two poets shown actively smoking. neil's mom doesn't appear for very long in the movie but during that time it definitely seems like the movie is intentionally making parallels between the two, particularly in the last argument with neil's father. neil and his mother are both sitting for almost the whole time, which contrasts with his father who is standing. they are both almost powerless in this scene. they stand up at almost the same time. anyways there's a couple different possibilities for what this could mean? that i've though of? 1. to show that neil's mother is in a similar situation to the one neil is in in regards to neil's father and 2. maybe a stretch here but the theory that neil inherited his mental illness at least partially from his mother. i'm pretty sure 1 was fully intentional on the directors part, not entirely sure about 2 though

unmanned flying desket scene: it's probably cause he and ethan wrote the scene themselves but the way rsl talks in this scene feels more like the way he talks in general than the rest of the script. like briefly neil perry is talking in rsl's voice. one of my absolute favorite scenes though the sarcastic dialogue is so good.

the light of knowledge at the first shot of the film vs. todd standing on his desk at the last shot of the film paralel

[the-nysh]

Rewatching Trigun's 98anime (subs this time, being used to the eng dub) since I was curious to note the characters' shifting pronoun usage.

For reference, Stampede Vash always uses the softer, more humble, modest, boyish 'boku' - as expected (like Trimax Vash), even after his glow up in ep12, he still regards himself the same way. While Knives (Nai) exclusively uses the harder, more assertive, masculine 'ore'...ever since he was a little baby, which immediately differentiates them apart, but is...extremely (lmao) edgy of him.

But in the 98anime? Oh my god, it's all flipped around and completely different! Which quite interestingly reveals a lot of contextual nuances to many characters, and quite frankly rewatching in Japanese trying to catch all these things only thoroughly kicked my ass throwing in so many difficult-to-understand, unexpected curveballs; I'm both shook and humbled by what I've heard!

Because 98 Knives refers to himself as 'boku' O____O;; even during his most 'villainous' lines yelling at Vash too. Him having that casual but 'polite' poised dissonance in his voice comes off extremely unnerving;;; when he speaks of horrible things thru such an 'innocent' self-perception like that. (Even Legato uses 'boku' like him! Same in Stampede.) Damn I'm disturbed. He and Vash notably both used 'boku' when they were kids, but Knives in particular never really stopped saying that from their childhoods, so that says a lot about him. (His "did you just shoot me [boku]!?" comes off very uncannily childlike. No wonder Vash freaked out in guilt.)

But 98 Vash? Whoa, he requires a whole damn essay flips around ALL the time, interchangeably using BOTH! :O Often switching pronouns between 'ore' & 'boku' within the same episode, or even as quickly as every other sentence, even towards the same person. Depending on the immediate context/topic of what he's saying and the emphasis on how he's saying it. Via all his posturing, which 'persona' he switches into, his familiarity/humbleness/honesty/trust--even hostility towards certain people, and his mood's silly vs seriousness levels. Often reflective of how determined/confrontational/casual he is vs being walled off (masking) to openly repentant, lost or distressed too - but not always! It's Extremely inconsistent fascinating but confusing!!! Because there's no....fixed 'rules' to his usage. For ex he'll often use 'ore' casually within his own internal monologues to his more bombastic public self-introductions, or even when he's at his most serious in private moments about grave matters, like settling his past during his scar scene with Meryl. Even Eriks!Vash still uses 'ore' when confessing his guilt to Wolfwood about the Fifth Moon! So there feels to be a general preference for using 'ore' when he (internally and externally, both in casual and serious contexts) needs to show his 'determination' - aka being the man (the ideal 'Vash'?) he wants to become.

But then he'll flip around using 'boku' for some of his most exasperatingly fake ✨playful✨ bits when he's kidding and messing around in mock courtesy (bonus: he even uses 'watashi' as a joke for his ridiculously long 'formal' name introduction to Wolfwood).....AND 'boku' will be used for his most sincere humble (polite) conversations back with family members he knows at Home, and when he connects back to his childhood with Rem in his dreams. The Diablo ep is a good example: he uses 'ore' throughout the ep until he reverts to 'boku' after speaking to Rem deciding not to kill, and that humbling shift, like to that of a lost younger boy, makes so much sense. The shift happens again when Eriks!Vash thinks about Rem feeling just as lost: "what should I [boku] do?" And after the tragic incident at Home when he's depressed and masking himself behind his glasses, while quietly reflecting to Wolfwood with a reproachful, "Everyone who touches me [boku] dies." ...Before immediately changing back to 'ore' in the next sentence firming his resolve to face Knives.

But in general it really depends and you have to listen hard (pay close attention) to hear how much contextual teasing, sincerity, irony, genuine respect, or...humbling self-reproach and self-depreciation he uses. Indicative towards how much (or how poorly) he internally regards himself and how he externally presents himself to others, because it changes. All the time. His personal pronouns aren't fixed! ...Basically, I'm just as confused as Meryl (and it really makes narrative sense why she's so confused by him), not knowing which 'persona' is the real him! x'D

...Oh but a really good moment, in ep24 when Meryl pleads at him to be honest with her for once about all the tragedies, he uses 'boku' explaining everything to her about Knives. That's....really good. :O Like umm...him using 'ore' before with her (in the scar scene) kind of erected a subtle barrier when he refused to elaborate further, but using 'boku' so sincerely for her request.....like it..extends her the same humble level of courtesy/trust he'd use towards the 'family' he loves back at Home (+Rem)....but it's so loaded, cause he's being honest but still...distant telling her why he's better off alone. :')) Man...(the aaangst) Oooooh, but then ep25 is very telling too, cause he's mentally lost for the whole ep, always using 'boku' so anguished and self-deprecatingly....until Meryl saves him and he gives her his softest genuine 'boku' yet, after he recovers back to himself donning the red coat again, thanking and assuring her he'll be alright. :'D (Hooray~) Before internally switching back to 'ore' on his final quest setting out alone for Knives. Ep26: he still keeps that distinct assertive 'ore' in front of Knives "I [ore] will survive!" and 'boku' for Rem: "I [boku] will continue to believe in you, but will look to my own [jibun] words for guidance." :')) (Bonus: 'jibun' is added when he philosophically thinks in terms of 'oneself'/'myself' from now on.)

Bonus nuance: while younger Vash may have dependently followed Knives' lead around--back when they both used 'boku' together, older (current) Vash--using 'ore' with him, feels like he's grown to assume the role as the more independent, responsible older brother now, when he finally understands how to put Rem's last words to 'take care of Knives' into practice. :'))

So tl;dr: Vash tends to have a casual leaning preference for using 'ore' in most situations both private and public, but especially for whenever he asserts his determination involving Knives with a confrontational edge. 'Boku' is used exclusively (politely, with genuine deference & care) towards extended family members he loves (like Rem, Brad, Doc, and eventually.....Meryl; using the softest 'boku' towards her I've ever heard. ;.;) And for whenever he humbles himself in distress, feeling lost in turmoil or self-reproach. But it's not set in stone! Since both pronouns can be used sincerely or ironically in jest, for whenever he's feeling silly or playing a bit (donning a mask), easily switching depending on presentation or context too. 98 Vash simply does what he wants! While Meryl screams in confused exasperation!

As for 98 Meryl, she often uses the book-standard, more formal/professional 'watashi' when introducing herself (Stampede Meryl too), and her speech patterns are typically very polite and pleasant to listen to (with many lovely 'desu-wa' sentence finishers.) ...Until she changes to the informal, more feminine 'atashi.' Ex: when screaming at Milly to let her go (to Vash) as the city blew up during the Fifth Moon incident. The raw sincerity in her voice for that change is so...🥺 of her. Note, cause most other girls - from Rem, Milly, younger kids like Lina, to older (but youthful) grandma characters all informally use 'atashi.' So for Meryl to drop her usual formalities when her honest feelings come out ("I [atashi] need to go there!" - to the epicenter where Vash is) means a lot. :')) ...Ah! Cause she slips to 'atashi' again in ep25, in front of Vash (while he uses 'boku' at his most mentally lost and openly wounded state) at his bedside. o///o Oh my... Using 'atashi' again while crying to Milly in regret that she couldn't confess anything yet to Vash on his sendoff. So yes, Meryl's feminine 'atashi' side shows whenever she expresses her honest feelings. :'3

Now 98 Wolfwood is a special case, cause he speaks primarily in Kansai dialect, which is extremely hard for me to understand what he's saying in modified/shortened slang all the time. (Compared to say, Meryl who speaks very cleanly and polite.) I've heard him use 'ore' when offering kids food, the more rural/casual form 'oira' when confessing his turmoil to Milly at his most vulnerable, 'uchi' when talking about 'our orphanage,' 'washi' (the 'old man' form of watashi) when speaking in more formal/aged terms of 'God', to the slang form 'wai' (he casually prefers this one a lot, and Stampede Wolfwood uses 'wai' too, esp when introducing himself to new people, for most of the few eps he's even in, and it makes him sound like...way older than he actually is?) to even 'jibun' when talking about himself with distance in flashbacks. The impression he gives off is like that of someone who's come from a rural/street kid (orphan) background...but who speaks like a chill elder now?? who's aged far too soon for his years. That's my best interpretation of what's happening. (His slang 'wai' even slurs to sound like 'oira,' almost like 'wai-ra' sometimes; gah it's really hard for me to discern, I'm sorry.) Bonus: he teasingly calls Milly 'my honey' in english, while she playfully answers him back with the pronounced 'a-na-ta' (dear), so they def have an inside thing going on. Bottom line, he's very complicated *bangs head on desk* and his accent is too unfamiliar/beyond my meager course level to fully grasp! :'D

To sum up (to the best of my hearing comprehension):

Stampede Vash: always boku, modest and unassuming towards everyone 98 Vash: BOTH ore & boku; not fixed. Casual preference for ore vs more humble courtesy using boku, but it's extremely context/mood/persona dependent, since he can mask & switch for jokes. Has a serious confrontational/determined edge using ore vs Knives--as if Vash becomes the older brother here, but always reserves the softer boku towards Rem and the found family he loves Stampede Knives: always ore, ever since he was a baby; so much edge 98 Knives: boku, coming off unnervingly childlike vs Vash's ore Meryl (both): watashi, but changes to atashi (98) when her honest feelings towards Vash show Wolfwood (both, Kansai dialect): primarily wai, but can use many other forms Legato (both): boku Roberto: ore Milly: atashi, but can mask using watashi when she's not fine Rem: atashi (98) & watashi (Stampede) Stampede Luida: watashi, but atashi when casual with teen Vash Brad (both): ore Dr. Conrad: watashi Stampede Elendira: watashi Stampede Zazie: boku

Now besides the animes, since Trimax is a whole other overwhelming complicated beast, and since I don't have access to check (nor would I even be able to easily read/understand) the Japanese raws, I'd be VERY interested in someone's investigation and breakdown into the manga's pronouns, especially for Trimax Vash, since I've heard that beyond 'boku,' he shifts and evolves throughout his journey too, possibly ending on a very soft wizened, matured 'watashi' that I'd love to hear more!

[sturniozo]

I was rewatching videos and had a fic idea. What if you and Chris made a plan to surprise nick and Matt by coming to LA and in the video where Chris makes the joke about someone hiding in the back of the car during the video nick goes to check and you are sitting back there and then cute stuff that follows it

Someone In The Backseat

I really love this idea lol. Sorry it’s short, I didn’t want to go watch the video since I’m in the middle of studying, but I wanted to write this one so badly!

Not proofread

masterlist

When Chris came up with the idea to fly me to LA to surprise my best friends, I was excited. But I should have known, being Chris, he had a different idea of a “surprise”

So here I am, hiding in the back of the van, waiting for my queue. The plan was to scare Nick and Matt during the car video they’re filming. It’s been almost thirty minutes since Chris had me hide in the back of the van. I had to suffer the drive to their spot hiding here as well. But it’s all worth it. I missed my best friends so much.

“And if there’s someone in the back?” Chris laughs. Nick gasps and immediately turns around.

“Don’t say shit like that!” He laugh nervously. Nick leans closer to check and I take my chance to sit up, causing both Nick and Matt to scream as well while Chris laughs. “Oh my god! Y/n!” Nicks yells and lightly hits my arm. I continue laughing as I climb into the backseat with Nick.

“Before you some at me, it was all Chris’s idea!” I say, still laughing.

Matt laughs “yeah I can tell, it has Chris written all over it.”

After filming the video, Matt drives us to a Sonic to get food and we sit in the van I the parking lot, laughing and talking.

“It really scared the shit out of Matt! He looked like he actually shit himself!” Chris laughs loudly and bounces around in his seat.

“It’s not that funny.” Matt mumbles.

“C’mon, it was funny. Right y/n?” Chris turns to me.

“Nicks reaction was funnier! I thought he was gonna swing at me!” I laugh.

“My flight or fight response is set to fight.” Nick says.

Needless to say, Chris’s idea was a success.

[rubywithecat]

hey! you are not writing for aot boys anymore??? :(( i used to wait for your hc they were the best!! if you are still writing for them, can you make aot boys and when their s/o makes them laugh?? (specially the jaegers brother huhhuhu)

Hihi! Omg im so glad that u like my hcs and thanks a lottt for loving them. It means a lot to me <3 T-T

And yess I’ll still write about AoT and I was even rewatching it during these days coincidently Loll

~AoT boys when their s/o makes them laugh~

-Eren-

U were humming ur fav song when he came into the kitchen. “What’s for dinner?” He asked as he hugged u from behind and kissed u. “It’s ur fav ramen, Eren” U answered, kissing him back. “My brother Zeke is also joining dinner tonight is that ok?” He asked as he helped you. “It’s fine I made a lot” u answered.

“Here are the servings. Zeke, help urself any drink u like it’s in refrigerator” u said as u joined the dinner table and he nodded. “What’s for dessert, love?” Eren asked taking a bite of his food. U looked at him and then smirked. “Well the dessert ur getting is me” U teased and winked at him. Zeke almost threw up his food and Eren got so shy that his cheek became red but he couldn’t help himself smiling so hard about it, then he coughed in embarrassment.

He dragged u to the kitchen counter and passionately kissed u. “Right in front of my brother?” He said. “Yeah? I did make u laugh right?” U said innocently. “U r going to regret it, love” He smirked.

-Reiner-

It’s rainy season and at Marley camp, u and other warriors have to train despite the heavy rain. U put on the raincoat and walked to training session with ur friends. “The rain isn’t stopping since the morning” Annie complained. “But I like rain” Berthold replied. “But not the heavy rain, Berthold. It makes us harder for outdoor practice” U said.

Reiner was already there and he was waiting for you guys under roof, arm crossed and standing position. “How’s ur way of coming here?” He teased as u removed ur raincoat. U sided eyed him and sarcastically said “It’s so good that I’m so wet right now” u said without thinking other meaning and the realized it and quickly yelled. “No no that’s not what I meant!” U look so cute for him being all shy. Reiner busted out in laughter. “Hey Reiner u dirty mind!!” U yelled. “Uh? I’m not the one who said I’m wet” he teased again which makes u blush even more.

-Porco-

Everybody partying hard after tough mission and u are at 2 shots now. “Let’s play truth or dare” Reiner suggested and others cheered him up. “Whatever” Porco said, annoyed as he smoked his cigarette. “Come on Porco! It’s gonna be fun!” U persuaded him. “Please” U gave him cute eyes and he finally agreed.

“Truth or dare?” Pieck asked u. “I’m going with dare” u said confidently. “Well, I dare u to say a cheesy pickup line to Galliard” she said, setting u up. It would be so embarrassing normally but ur vodka shots make u over confident. U grabbed Porco shirt’s collar and whispered into his ears. “Hey Mr.Jaw titan, don’t look down on me cuz i would look so good underneath you”. He smiled and then laughed so hard. “What did she say?” Zeke asked loudly. “Shut the fck up I’m not telling u” Porco replied.

The next day, u couldn’t even look at Porco face cuz of embarrassment. He would laugh about it and find it cute. “Hey how did u sleep last night huh?” He asked. “Fine I guess” u said awkwardly. He suddenly pinned u to the wall and u thought he was gonna kiss u but he just looked at u closely and smirked. “Mr Jaw titan was a smooth line” he teased.

-Zeke-

He was having a hard day but still make time for the date. He agreed to go look sunset with u even tho he has stress about his work on unfinished project, he pretended like it’s nth and doesn’t wanna make u feel like a burden to him cuz ur not.

“Zeke look at there” u pointed to somewhere and when he tilted his head, u sneaked a kiss on cheek suddenly. He was surprised but he smiled at u and u can tell it makes his day a lot better. “U little sneak” he said as he grabbed ur neck and kissed passionately back. “U could have said so if u want it” he smirked and u giggled. “I can make ur stress is away, trust me?” U teased him, bitting ur lips.

-Levi-

U made a bet with Connie and Sasha that they owe u a drink if u could make ur captain laugh. At first, u tried with all the humors but he got all serious and as a result, u got punished by having to clean the window.

It’s nearly night time and u were still cleaning the windows. “I think he’s being so heartless” u told to Sasha as u wiped the window with anger. “Well, U shouldn’t have accepted the challenge” Sasha said, helping u. “Yeah I’m regretting that now Sasha” U sighed and suddenly yelled as u saw Levi behind u as u turned to get water. “Captain! Didn’t see u there hahaha” u said awkwardly. “Who were u telling that is heatless?” “We were talking about….umm… Jean” U looked at Sasha, asking for help. “Yeah yeah Jean was… acting so mean…” she played along. “R u sure? I thought that kid was talking about me” he asked her and looking suspiciously at u. U smiled confidently but dying inside. “Why would I say such thing to our handsome and hot captain?” U said dramatically, looking at him with puppy eyes. He looked at u back for a sec and he can’t help but let out a little laugh. “Stop messing with me kid” he replied. U can even see him blush.

-Erwin-

It was a formal meeting and u had to follow Erwin as his personal assistant. U had to wear heels and formal tight dress which is really uncomfortable for u.

After meeting, u thought everyone left so, u took off ur heels and swore. “Fck that hurts! How did those women stayed all fine with these fcking shoes!” U were talking to urself. Then u looked aside and saw Erwin was there. “Ah— im so sorry sir! Since when did u come back?” U apologized immediately. “Don’t wear it if it’s uncomfortable for u” He gave u a new pair of shoes. “I brought this for u” he said as he helped u wear the slippers. “Sir u don’t have to! Thank u so much!” U said as he finished. U stood up “Omg this is so amazing! Ur the best Captain!” U said and it made him laugh. “I’m glad u like that” he replied.

[reyalvr]

Hi! I've had this idea simmering for a bit - could you possibly do an angsty enemies-to-lovers Aonung x fem Sully reader where they're veryyyy much enemies but during the demon ship battle, either one of reader's close friends/family members (could be neteyam or someone else) is dying and they ask aonung to not let reader look. She's freaking out and losing it and he's just trying to comfort her, hug her, calm her down, etc. Hope this isn't too specific - do with it what you wish :) tysm

ASHES ON FIRE.

୨⎯ in which peace is luxury that you cannot afford.  ⎯୧

genre┊ angst, slight e2l & comfort, one-shot

pairing┊ao’nung x fem-sully!reader (? help), a little (lot) bit of brother!neteyam & fem-sully!reader as well

wordcount┊2.9k

warnings┊major movie spoilers, death 

author’s note┊ finally doing this request! i’ve been wanting to write it for a while now but i was so focused on ITMOIA <//3 hope i did this justice, anon! i had to rewatch the demon ship scene a couple times so i could stay true to the story, so apologies if i messed up a bit on the prompt you gave me T^T.

song recs ┊ na'vi attack, the bug collector.

The sky people say that ignorance is strength. That if you were numb enough to your surroundings, nothing would be able to break you; that nothing would matter so long as you didn’t feel anything. 

They were wrong.

It had all happened so fast – all of you riding out the moment you realized that your siblings were in danger, the war party attacking the RDA the second Payakan had seized the demon ship. Against your father’s orders, you had jumped on your ikran as fast as you could, flying all the way to Three Brother’s Rocks. 

You had no plan, only focused on saving your family. You soared swiftly through the clouds, drawing your bow each time you came in contact with an enemy ship. You had lost count of how many times you had shot something into the sea – it didn’t matter to you anymore. 

Chaos had struck all around you; everywhere you turned, you saw war. The Great Balance wasn’t present here, this was a place of loss. You yelled as you narrowly missed the shots fired from a gunship, and you retaliated by shooting an arrow into its propellers.

You were running on pure adrenaline, your mind clouded with only one thought: save your siblings. It was a recurring voice in the back of your head, and it seemed to jolt you back into focus every time you felt your nerves start to calm down. You hissed as you flew near the water now, aiming for any of the boats that shot at the clan. 

For a split second you were able to catch a glimpse of yourself in the water. You were terrifying. Your eyes had gone completely wide, pupils so constricted to the point where they were almost gone. The sneer on your lips didn’t aid in making you look less terrorizing; you were absolutely feral.

You didn’t linger on your appearance for too long, though,  as you had come in contact with one of the avatars, their bullets slightly grazing your shoulder. You yelped as you banked hard in order to get away from them, your adrenaline the only thing stopping you from feeling any immediate pain. 

It stung, bad, as you drew your bow, aiming directly for their heart. You let go without a moment’s hesitation, watching as the demon slid off of his ikran and into the water. You yelled in fury, your mind still unable to process your recent actions. 

Your ears perked up at the sound of rapid gunfire to your side, your eyes growing even wider as you recognized the electric blue colors of your mother’s ikran. You turned sharply, almost hitting the side of the ship as you willed your banshee to get to your mother’s position. 

“Mom!” You yelled, bow drawn as you aimed for another one of the demons. 

Her head turned instantly at the sound of your voice, her face blanketed in fear and worry. She had no time to scold you for being on the battleground, her attention concentrated on ambushing the sky people. 

You watched as your arrow soared straight into the avatar’s chest, his limp body plunging into the water like bait. The pain in your shoulder had started to make itself known again, yet you pushed forward in battle. You weren’t gonna let a minor injury get in the way of your rescue mission. 

Though, your streak of undefeated shots had to be ended sooner or later. You hadn’t seen the boat from underneath you, and they landed a shot to your ikran’s leg. You heard her screech, and the both of you rapidly barreled into the ocean. 

“[Y/N]!” You heard your mother yell before you were surrounded by water. 

Your ikran, though injured, had been able to pull herself out of the water and fly to safety. You quickly followed, gasping for air as you swam to the surface. You didn’t waste any time in finding land, and you moved fast in order to get cover. 

You were vulnerable now to the enemy’s attacks, no longer having the advantage of being in the air or wielding a bow. You leaned against the rocks, looking out for gunships while simultaneously catching your breath. The weight of fatigue was starting to hit you now, and you feared that your body would soon succumb to the exertion you had put yourself through. 

The battle prayer to Eywa rang in your head, the words of the Great Mother slowly pushing you to move forward. Tirea oeyä maway livu, Ma Eywa. Calm my spirit, Eywa.

You groaned, your eyes closed as you forced yourself to stand. All hope was not lost, as in the distance you spotted the familiar dark blue of your sister’s skin. You called for an ilu and dove quickly, swimming as fast as you could to Kiri and the others. 

“Kiri!” You yelled as you neared them, your heart pounding in relief. 

She turned, her eyes recognizing you as soon as she saw you. “Sister!” 

Your reunion with her would not be now, however, as an ikran had plucked her up right in front of you before you’d even been able to wrap your arms around her. You yelled, your voice nearly going hoarse, and whatever tiredness your body felt was soon melted away by the bubbling rage within you. 

“No!” You screamed, and you moved to chase after her but were stopped by an iron grip around your arm.

You hissed as you turned to face whoever was stopping you from saving your sister. Ao’nung pulled you in, his eyes scanning over your face as he tried to tell you to fall back. You stood now on the remnants of a destroyed boat, though you would much rather be on your way to hunt whoever had stolen your sister from you. 

“Let me go!” You yelled at the Metkayinan boy, your other hand coming up to yank his hold off of you. “I need to get to the demon ship, now!”

“And let you die?” He argued back. “No, I won’t allow it.”

“Who the hell do you think you are?” You spat, your tone as venomous as your stare. “Who are you to decide that for me?”

“That does not matter! I will not let you go in there unarmed!” He fought back, both of his hands now gripping your forearms. 

You hissed at him again, your body on the brink of lashing out. Was he out of his mind? Your siblings were in danger, now more than ever. He could not keep you here, you weren’t going to allow it. You thrashed, exerting yourself to the max as you tried to free yourself from his hold. 

“[Y/N], please,” Rotxo spoke up, his expression filled with concern. “Ao’nung is right, it is too dangerous for you to go in there alone!”

“I do not care!” You roared. “Kiri was just taken, right before our eyes! If I do not get to her now she could die! What don’t you understand about that?”

They flinched at your voice, and that gave you the opportunity to finally free yourself from Ao’nung. Your head whipped in his direction, your glare shooting daggers into his skull. He moved to grab you again, but you were swift in avoiding his movements. You were about to jump back into the water and swim to the demon ship before you caught sight of someone from your peripheral. 

You turned, your breath hitching as you watched your brothers hastily guide an ilu to a desolate island. You didn’t have to say another word before the three of you swam hurriedly to them, your legs burning as you forced yourself to move faster. 

You climbed up the rocks, not caring if your knees and palms were scrapped by the jagged edges. You opened your mouth to call out to them, but stopped as soon as you registered the scene in front of you. Your heart dropped, and you could feel yourself shake as emotion after emotion overwhelmed your body.

On the ground lay Neteyam, his body jerking as he fought to maintain his breath. There was a scarlet wound on his chest, blood continuously leaking out of him as Lo’ak did his best to stop it from flowing any further. You nearly lost balance as you dropped down, holding your brother’s head away from the hard rock and onto your lap.

“What happened?” You demanded, your eyes frantically examining his current state. “What happened?”

“‘Was shot,” Neteyam murmured, the action clearly taking a toll on him. 

“Shut up, damnit,” You hissed at him, your tone fluctuating from anger to concern to fear. “Do not exert yourself for Eywa’s sake!” 

“We went back for Spider,” Lo’ak said to you as he continued to put pressure on your brother’s wound. “Neteyam he- he got,” 

He was panicking now, his breath coming in short. You were trying your best to remain sane, though the situation you were in only aided in making you feel worse. Your sisters were being held hostage by those demons, and now your worst fear had suddenly come to life. 

Your mouth went dry as you tried to focus, your ears ringing from the forced concentration. You couldn’t think straight, and the inconsistent beat of your heart was preventing you from doing anything precisely. Somewhere in the distance you heard your mother and father, their cries of panic suddenly filling the grief-stricken atmosphere. 

You had no time to acknowledge them though, as you were solely focused on Neteyam’s condition. There was blood – so much blood that you started to feel lightheaded from the sight. Your hands had come up behind his back, your palms covering the exit point of his wound. 

The sky above you was grey, the bright blues no longer gracing Awa’atlu. Eclipse was near, and the smoke around you had only added to the lifelessness of the Great Mother’s land. Your brother still struggled to maintain his breath, his pupils dilating more and more the harder he tried to remain conscious. 

You couldn’t think, you couldn’t speak. Your body was operating on auto-pilot, your mind blocking out as many distractions as it could. You hung your head low, feeling hot tears starting to form. You prayed every prayer to Eywa, begging her to spare your brother. It could not be his time yet; it would be too cruel. 

Your father’s hand came up to cup your brother’s face, and you had never seen him more broken in your entire life. Neteyam was begging now, begging to go home. Your real home. Home to the fortress of the Omatikaya, home to the forests of Eywa, home to his family. 

“I know, I know,” You father breathed out, the pain in his heart spreading to his expression. “It’s okay, we’re going home.”

Neteyam looked around him now, his eyes darting from one person to another. His gaze landed on you before he spoke up, his voice so weak that it broke your heart.

“Dad, I,” He finally let out. 

You waited for him to finish his sentence. You waited for what felt like an eternity. You waited and waited and waited. But his reply never came, only the deathly silence of loss filling his being. You didn’t want to believe it. It was not right, this loss. 

You blinked slowly, your breath so slow that it felt like someone had knocked you over. Your mind had registered Neteyam’s death almost instantly, but your heart – oh Eywa, your heart. Your heart was heavy, filled with so much sorrow that it nearly broke you. 

Your world had shifted the moment your brother passed, and it felt wrong. Neteyam’s spirit was with the Great Mother now; you couldn’t battle anyone for his soul back, couldn’t bargain with any Tsahik for more time. He was gone. 

Your mother wailed the moment she realized your brother had passed, and her screams of agony pierced your heart the same way his death had. You felt your shoulder slump, your hands slipping from your brother’s back as you no longer tried to stop the bleeding. 

Your auto-pilot had been switched then, the reality of your world crashing in on you. You felt like you were about to break, like you were about to shatter into a million pieces. Your head was spinning, so much to the point where you nearly fell as you slightly backed away from your brother’s lifeless body. 

Your sweet, beautiful, kind-hearted big brother was gone. You felt like you were a child again, waiting for Neteyam to tell you that this was all just a nightmare. Eclipse had finally set, the world around you going dark as the fires continued to blaze. 

Your family was frantic now, your father trying to get your mother to stay strong, Lo’ak disassociating from the world around him. You cried then, cried like you would never be able to cry again. You placed your forehead against your brother’s cold one, your screams scratching your throat. 

You cried out for Neteyam, cried out for your mighty brother. He was the glue that held your family together, and without him you didn’t know how any of you would be able to live on. The others just watched over you as you sobbed, their eyes so full of pity. 

You didn’t care if they saw you as weak now, you were hurting so badly. May Eywa never let them experience this kind of loss, because you could feel a piece of you dying alongside your brother the longer you continued to cry. You felt a pair of hands come up on your shoulders, and you tried to push them away with whatever might you had left in you. 

“[Y/N],” You heard Ao’nung say, his calloused hands still gentle with you as you continued to break down. “[Y/N] you must rest.”

You lifted your head, finally seeing that your family, as well as Spider, had disappeared. You looked at Tsireya, and the look in her eyes had told you everything you needed to know. Stay here, please, her gaze said. 

You took a deep breath in, and it felt like you were breathing again for the first time. You wanted to go against whatever orders your father had told them to give you, but you knew that acting rashly would only worsen things for you. So you stayed, glued to your brother’s side as you mourned your loss.

Ao’nung had not left your side either, his worriedness for your wellbeing keeping him attentive. You couldn’t tell if he was doing this to help your father or if he was doing this to keep you from going insane, but still it gave you a sense of comfort – however cruel it might be to long for it during this time. 

He didn’t say anything to you, only rubbing your shoulders to keep you grounded and aware. If this had been any other situation, you would have already distanced yourself from him. You and Ao’nung weren’t friends, though you weren’t exactly horrible towards each other either. Either way, you didn’t feel the urge to yell at him to go away; instead his presence soothed you, slowly getting you to calm your nerves. 

You leaned into him, and he took you in with open arms. Though your heart was still heavy, your body had seeked the warmth that it desperately needed. He matched his breathing with yours, aiding to quell the tensenes of your body. 

You watched as Tsireya and Rotxo tried to clean up whatever they could off of your brother’s body, their movements light and gentle. You held his cold hand, your hands coming up to close his eyes. He looked peaceful now, as if he were just resting.

You would have believed so, had it not been for his dried blood on your hands. Your bottom lip quivered, and you closed your eyes once more as you fought to stay composed. 

You felt Ao’nung’s thumb rubbing circles on your arm, his other hand clasped around your free hand. This was an intimate gesture between mated people, you knew, but you didn’t care. His comfort gave you an escape from the harsh realities of life. You felt yourself drifting off, your body too tired to remain awake. 

“Sleep if you want to,” Ao’nung whispered. “You and your brother are safe here.”

You sniffled slightly as you nodded your head, your eyes heavy from crying. “I must pray over him first. I must protect him this one last time.”

He only nodded, still keeping his arms around you as you brought Neteyam’s hand up to your heart. 

“Oel ngati kameie, ma tsmukan, ulte ngaru seiyi irayo. Ngari hu Eywa salew tirea, tokx 'ì'awn slu Na'viyä hapxì.” You said in a hushed tone, the others bowing their heads as you recited the death prayer.

I see you, brother, and I thank you. Your spirit will run with Eywa, while your body will remain and become part of the People.

You leaned back into Ao’nung, your hand finally clasping around his as well. You squeezed his hand, tilting your head slightly to look at him. You closed your eyes, bowing your head to him. 

“I see you.” You whispered. 

He held you closer, his voice the last thing you heard before slumber had taken over your body. “I see you.”

reyalvr © 2023 ... do not repost, alter, or steal my work.

tags┊@chunghaaaa, @kiris-wife, @8resa, @avatarkv, @urlocalkeemawearingartist

[pinkcrocss]

On Andre...

So, I've been picking up on a lot of negative feelings towards Andre within the fandom (some warranted, some unwarranted in my opinion). And I think it comes down to two things:

-Andre is probably one of the least developed of the core group in terms of writing.

-Andre's actor (Chance Perdomo) has some problematic views irl.

I want to focus on the first point however, cuz I'm interested in the character not the actor (Patrick Schwarzeneggar and Claudia Dumit also support Isreal, so I'm choosing to focus my feelings on characters, not the actors if I want to enjoy this show at all).

When I first watched Gen V (before the hyper fixation had kicked in), Chance's performance had been one of my least favourites. I didn't like the weird voice he was doing (turns out he was Brit doing a pretty decent attempt at an "American Jock" type accent) and I thought the actor kept doing a lot of awkward stammers and tics that didn't feel in line with the character (I assumed, that's just how the actor was irl). That is until I watched a cast interview and I learned 2 things:

He is a Brit.

He's actually a very smooth and clear speaker. Which means those mannerisms were an intentional choice by the actor.

Later, once the hyperfixation had truly set in, I was watching a boatload of cast interviews, when I caught a comment underneath one of those videos that totally changed my view of that character and performance during my 4th (maybe 5th) rewatch.

You know how each of the core group's abilities hurts them in some way and thus works as an allegory for some form of personal issue that they are overcoming? i.e.

Marie -> Cutting/Self Harm

Emma -> Eating Disorders

Cate -> Consent

Jordan -> Gender Identity/dysphoria

For a while, I don't really see how Andre's abilities could serve as an allegory for anything. like, yes later on we learn that his powers will cause him damage over time, but that kind of seemed ham-fisted at the last minute, and not really connected to his ability to bend metal.

But back to that one Youtube comment. I can't remember word for word the comment, but to paraphrase, essentially:

The commentor spoke about how they connected to Andre's character a lot because when they were in college, they had developed an auto-immune disease that essentially made them chronically ill.

They talked about being unable to keep up with their peers, while they were supposed to be in their prime physical years, and how much that taxed on their mental health. Constantly feeling left out, constantly self-medicating, and the chronic pain that they just had to grin and bear.

And as soon as I read that, everything I didn't quite understand/connect with in Andre's character suddenly made sense.

What is one of Andre's core personality traits in the group? He's the stoner.

From episode one, there's a scene of him doing drugs in every episode. Cate is constantly asking him if he's high... he's self medicating.

The slow way he talks, the constant blinking and squeezing his face (note the scene when he's yelling at Tek Knight, or after he takes that first hit from Sam, or after he stops the helicopter)... he's in pain.

So many tics and nuances in his behaviour that I initially wrote off, was actually a much more nuanced performance from Chance Perdomo.

And it all coalesces in that final scene when Andre is at Vought tower and learns of his dad's diagnosis. His powers are slowly killing him, making him weaker (like an auto-immune disease. the body attacking itself).

And the doctor asks him if he ever feels light-headed? has he noticed any uncontrollable tics? Andre is hesitant, almost like he's in denial. But you look back at his actions/behaviour throughout the show, and he's been showcasing both those things.

Finally, the scene with the helicopter. Where it's more or less confirmed that Andre's powers are doing to him, exactly what his dad's powers did. I've seen people very critical of that scene. Saying things like, Oh! He's all of a sudden being affected by the use of his powers, but we hadn't seen that previously (which I disagree) and how it seemed "too convenient".

But keep in mind, stopping a decelerating helicopter is the biggest feat of Andre's abilities we'd seen so far in the show. Of course it's going to take a bigger toll on him than all the other times (not to mention he was in pretty big emotional distress. His dad, Cate's betrayal, an attack on the school...). Stress exacerbates illnesses.

The other critique I've seen is, why are Andre's abilities having this affect now? He's supposed to be in his 20s, but his dad made it all the way to his 40s/50s before it was detected... and that's a fair question. I have some theories:

Like certain genetic illnesses, this issue is hereditary. It's not Impossible, that Andre just inherited a stronger ability than his father, and thus stronger blowback on himself.

Andre's chronic drug use might be a chicken or egg situation. Where maybe his chronic drug use exacerbated the damage his abilities were causing him, and as a result he started self-medicating with more drugs, causing a continues cycle of him increasing the damage to himself.

His dad has been shown to have a very stubborn personality (note how he refused to acknowledge when Andre revealed to him the damage their powers were causing them). Perhaps, he had started feeling the symptoms around the same age Andre had, but just kept ignoring it and pushing through up until he reached his limit in his 40s/50s.

Some other reason that writer's haven't revealed yet. The show has been renewed for a second season, and it's obvious these characters have been set up to be integral to the overarching storyline of the boys as a whole. It's entirely possible that there is more potential development for Andre's character in the future, and I think it's fair to give the writers leeway to explore that.

All in all, I just wanted to get my thoughts out about this, and maybe see how everyone else views Andre's character. He seems to be one of the least discussed in the core group, and I feel like his character has a lot of room for more development in the future if the writers approach it correctly.

[respectthepetty]

Pride Petty Watch (SOTUS) 1/5

The crowd picked two blacklisted shows for me to watch during Pride, which were Love in the Air and The Untamed, and so even though I finished the first, I've stalled on the second, and it's all because of the beast named SOTUS. I watched this show when it aired in 2016, but I don't remember any of it. All I remember is that I'm very mad at it, yet this was the wild card show that was unlocked during the voting, so instead of fearing this show so much that I cannot bring myself to finish The Untamed, I'm going straight to the big boss, and fighting this demon NOW!

It's me and the gear in a battle until the very end, and even though I cannot remember a single thing about this show, as soon as I pressed play, all the hate in my body rose to the surface, so I already know this is going to be a ~journey~

First and foremost, I'm going to give this show and Krist a compliment because I HATE Arthit, which is exactly what I should be doing in the first episode. He is 🎶The Worst🎶 and he leans all the way into it. He snarls. He yells. He forces a girl to give him her number through mere power dynamics and sexism, and this isn't just 2024-me thinking this. 2016-me knows that this character is written well because the worst thing Arthit can think of doing to another man is making him say he is gay.

Then to casually whisper in that man's ear that he could find him a skirt to wear . . .

Arthit really is the epitome of the homophobe-to-homo character and I can't believe that it worked in 2016 since I feel that was late for a character like this to still be a love interest, yet it's still working so well in 2024 because here I am, pissed, pressed, and ready to fuck him up for being the douchiest bro in this damn cafeteria. It's refreshing how much I'm allowed to hate him.

Because even the way he screams Kongpob's name with his student ID every fucking two seconds is setting me off.

And I'm very disappointed in BL Land for only ONE video existing of him screaming Kongpob's name, and it's only the times from the first half of the first episode. Thanks, OP, but we are slacking!

But, honestly, if I had a boy who looked up at me like this every time I screamed his name, I'd probably be a lot worse than Arthit. You know, instigating fights and hands on me or something like that.

And now I'm questioning this series because if these two would just choke each other out then kiss, I would be fully for it and enjoying all my snacks along the way. I'd be fine with Kongpob telling the entire room he would make Arthit his bitch, but Kongpob instead says he'll make Arthit his wife, and . . . the vibe is not as kinky as I need it to be to support all that is being thrown at me from these two.

Which is why I'm heavily shipping Kongpob with M! Kongpob got in trouble for having two books, one which was M's, and had to say he liked men. Now, they are drunk at this table with homophobe Arthit and the hazers are staring them down while Kongpob is just holding M's face.

But let me actually rewatch this show instead of reflecting on how GMMTV messed this enemies AND lovers premise up twice (looking at you, Dangerous Romance) because right now, this show is trying to make me believe the girls would not wave hello to a babyface Off.

Once again, back to the actual rewatch, and because I don't remember a thing about this, I don't know if Wad is good or bad, but him busting out this move when Prem told him to apologize was equivalent to an older white Southern Christian woman telling someone to have a blessed day, so I felt that shade through the screen!

And I'm not victim-blaming, but I do actually think Kongpob and Arthit are trying to push each buttons to see who will break first and fuck (up) the other one because this is not a sane answer to "why did you stay?" when the possibility of the hazers physically harming someone is extremely high.

I only see my Kongpob and M ship now because when Arthit asked if anyone knew M, Kongpob immediately stood up and knew his entire life story. I have known my best friends for decades, and I still could not recite half of that information. Kongpob, what are the heterosexual reasons for you know any of this information about M?

JAN!

Once again, Arthit is 🎶The Fucking Worst🎶 because instead of just taking his L, he made Kongpob say everyone's damn name, then ripped up May's name tag, only to scold Kongpob for giving her his, and now the kids are passing out from his ridiculous physical activities! As a member of a Greek-letter organization who was hazed because that was the culture of the time period, Arthit is being soooooo messy!

Hear me out - Kongpob and M would be so good together! Arthit is the antagonist. Kongpob is the protagonist who meets a sweet quiet boy on his first day of orientation. He helps the sweet quiet boy come out of his shell and watches over him. He cares for him. THEY FALL IN LOVE!

But instead I'm getting a love interest who nominated Kongpob because he knows he is cute, yet can't admit it because ~internalized homophobia~ Ryan from The OC would have never treated Seth this way, and they were in the early 2000s. What is your excuse, Arthit?! The show wants me to hate you, and for that, I'm thankful.

But I could never hate Minnie! Arthit came up quick like he was protecting the boys from Minnie being a predator, but Minnie would NEVER! I could never fear Minnie with the bisexual scarf? And now MDL is telling me the actor has only acted in one other series and that series is Deep Night. Gold star resume, and I truly mean that.

Look at them. LOOK AT THEM! Tell me they don't look good together. Tell me they wouldn't have wrecked every other ship. This is why I need GMMTV to let these MEN (no longer boys) kiss their homies. Kongpob x M. Singto x New. I ship it.

*punching walls and ripping doors off hinges* Kongpob gets kicked out the group and the FIRST one to stand up for him is the boy he loves (it's canon to me and IDGAF what the story's gotta say about it). Quiet and sweet M finds his voice just so he can ask to have Kongpob back. THEY ARE IN LOVE!

Arthit is wildin' out here trying to gaslight Kongpob with this bullshit of "if you keep helping out your friends, then they'll never stand on their own." Sir, you wanna fuck Kongpob so bad, you look stupid.

AND KONGPOB SAYS IT!

I cannot stress enough how kinky this is and could have been if 2016 BL Land was allowed to lean into this because Kongpob has already established through his actions that he likes showing up for the punishments, and here he says the quiet part very loudly - Arthit likes punishing him.

Taking a break from the kink to point out that GMMTV was always going to get My Love Mix-Up because in 2016, May's friend said that "In Japan, if you write down the name of your crush on an eraser and use it, that person will love you"

Then we have May asking for an eraser and keeping it just so she can write Kongpob's name on it. But who gets upset about it? M! Because he loves Kongpob and I'm not accepting that he likes May just like Atom realized he liked a boy instead of girl eight years later. M loves Kongpob. That is my truth!

And here comes the kink lite again! Kongpob could leave. He doesn't have to take this verbal abuse from Arthit. He doesn't have to eat that damn spicy ass plate of food. He doesn't have to finish it either because Arthit gets up and leaves, yet HE DOES! Because he likes this treatment. This makes sense if it's sadomasochism, and that will guide me through these next couple of episodes.

Because the decision to make Arthit the one who likes pink milk is a choice, and now I want an entire TED Talk on how Arthit is probably the most well done homophobic bully with internationalized homophobia falling in love with the boy he is bullying.

Because, joke's on him, the guy he falls for is into that kind of shit.

And all of this happens so we can end with Kongpob getting pink milk for himself after he finished an entire spicy meal that he didn't need to since he enjoys being punished should make me so happy, but the show is trying to lighten Arthit's behavior by having him pay for the bill (and get the freshmen food, and having been hazed himself, and blah blah blah) instead of just letting the toxicito be toxic and Kongpob being into it.

I never thought I'd write this, but I don't want Arthit to be tamed. I want him to be so much worse.

[voylitscope]

I have been feeling sick for the past couple of days. So, while fevered and with cold medicine in my system, I rewatched the Cap trilogy one night and then the Avengers movies as if they were a trilogy on the next. (There are three of them if you don't watch Endgame!) I also wrote down nearly 5,000 words of, honestly, unhinged thoughts about the Cap trilogy and another just over 3,000 about the Avengers movies while I watched.

And many of these words are me repeatedly, often in capslock, saying, at relevant points, that either a) Steve is the actual cutest, b) Steve is correct about everything at all times, c) Bucky did nothing wrong and deserves none of this, or d)it is still astounding to me that lines like, "Even when I had nothing, I had Bucky,'" are actually canon. Which, you know, was incredibly valid of my fevered self.

But, rereading all of those words now that I'm a bit more coherent, I thought this note I made during CA:TFA was especially correct and valid:

No one in the HISTORY OF FILM has ever refused to Not Die unless the Other Person with them Also Did Not Die, with the sheer force and will and determination of Bucky Barnes. "No, I will NOT survive this without you!" Bucky yelled, and it was the very most ardently that type of line had ever been delivered in all of cinema.

And I know we talk about that a lot, but I feel like we could always stand to talk about it more, honestly. I feel like we should maybe never stop talking about it.

I also made this note during CA:CW, and I think my fevered, tired, multiple hours-into movie-watching, self had a point here that we could also talk about more often:

Okay BUT: Vision becoming so distracted by Wanda he makes a mistake in targeting is meant to be read as romantic re: Vision and Wanda. This is clearly intended canon. So, okay. Sure. Steve (in this same movie!) becoming distracted by Bucky's mere mention and missing clocking that bomb in Lagos, is, then, by that same logic ___?