#theres a lot of people i should thank but not enough space

[vivitheanimaxen]

Emberfish!!! Au!!!! It's so good!

Theres something FISHY going up in this au....... Ahah

Anyways i don't really know what to ask i just want to say i love it nd i appreciate you. Its great

Oh yeah, so here are some questions: how social merpeople are is based on dolphins, right? Are the pods always only 3 people? Do you think merpeople can survive alone or in a sort of close knit "village" with others? They should be able to hunt, right?

Thank you!! There is something fishy going on, i'm glad you've noticed ;)

How social mer are is actually based off of both dolphins and humans. I've found that people underestimate just how social we are as human beings, and how, if you are put in an environment that requires you to work together with a group to survive, natural selection tends to hone those more social instincts. And on top of that, being alone in the vast ocean where sometimes it's hard to tell up from down and day from night can drive a mer mad if they don't have SOMEONE to talk to. Mer find it a lot easier to end up in situations that are sensory depriving. And for a species hardwired to be on alert at all times? That sort of thing takes it's toll.

It's also a little bit taken from space aus and "humans are weird/earth is space australia" stuff I've seen and really enjoyed over the years. Especially with Martyn's thoughts on 'mer will pod-bond with anything that gives them enough attention.' it's essentially the mer version of pack-bonding for humans, and how we tend to build relationships with any sort of animals we can feasibly keep as a pet, and even inanimate objects.

A pods of around 7-15 mer is considered the normal size for a pod, and is typically the size for a stable 'family' pod. A family pod is usually from 1-3 mating pairs, along with their children, and perhaps a few other friends or younger mer from other pods who are courting or become friends with their children.

The minimum for a pod is 3, because otherwise that's just a pair, and from 3-7 mer is considered a small pod. I've gone over this before in other asks, but as mer grow up, it's not uncommon for teenage mer to leave their family pods (sometimes alone, if there's another pod they can join right away, but more typically in pairs or trios of siblings or pod-mates) and strike out on their own. These younger mer will often form friend based pods (like Grian's pod or like the NHO pod that Etho and Bdubs belonged to before they left and met Tango), which are pretty unstable until the mer fully mature, and often end up becoming new family pods as romance blooms, yadda yadda yadda birds and the bees.

Not always, though, as we see with both the 'bet' pod (Bdubs, Etho, nd Tango) and Grian's pod. Etho, Bdubs, and Tango could join up with another pod if they wanted to, they just don't.

Anything bigger than roughly 15 members is considered a 'large' pod. There tend to be fewer of these, and they tend to be more migratory because of their larger draw on the resources around them. Large pods also tend to be more unstable as different smaller pods can join or leave depending on the time of year and the specific migratory path, and teen mer who have left the family pod where they grew up might join or leave whenever. They due tend to be great sources of gossip and general knowledge and skills, though, due to the many members and because they have more hands to do the work they can get more specialized in what they know. They also tend to have more well established migration paths, and normally there's a more stable extended family in a large pod that acts as the 'backbone' and leadership, so to speak. They tend to function like more like close knit little villages, rather than small family groups.

The hivemind pod (lead by Doc) is a very unique outlier in this, being completely stationary, and having roughly 50 members at any given time. They're basically trying to create mer agriculture, and are already a major trading center.

While lone mer can survive on their own, especially as adults, it is very very hard and very very stressful. Most don't do it unless they have to, because of how dangerous the ocean can be. Hunting in general is difficult, and mer need meat in their diets to support their high metabolisms. They can survive off of foraging alone, but clams and other shellfish can be hard to get into without the right strength or tools, and mer can't survive off of only plants in the long run.

When one wrong move can net you an injury that might impede your ability to hunt, and you're alone? That mer is basically shark chum unless they are either very lucky or can find someone to help. A mer alone lives on a kinfe's edge. Most simply choose the safer option to be in a pod.

[spiderh0rse]

took a short break from Freeman's Mind to go and watch Mind of Ryan, and in short order, Arlen's Mind. Decided to take notes on these too, while I was at it, thanks in large part to @prinnamon having done the same! This is all of my notes on Mind of Ryan, Arlen's will be out in short enough order.

e1

singing :> casually in a public location, so he probably doesn't care if he's heard doing so

his usual parking lot isn't often crowded

sandwich... Steal it, Ryan. You'll need the energy in the coming days.

didn't sleep well. NO ONE in mindverse sleeps well.

his usual lot is usually Empty.

enjoys the idea of pissing people off with his parking location

almost forgot to lock his car

wears his lab coat all the time. He thinks it's cool, it's cozy, I get it.

used to live in Michigan. Power grid for his town tanked by a raccoon once

laughs at someone menaced by his car alarm

unbothered by power issues

likes soda. Or at least isn't unhappy with it

laughs off someone overreacting to a minor inconvenience

shares a living space with Barney. Probably lives on-site, then? Barney's tram in to work goes from the dorms to his station. The car is weird, then, unless theres no tram to Ryan's usual spot.

Barney sleeps heavily or simply was exhausted. I like that this explains his being late, a bit.

opens double doors dramatically

bit of a flat affect. My autism senses are tingling

his college wasn't air conditioned :( Black Mesa is, though!

having his eyes out would Suck

very sarcastic

at least two miles above AnMat, he claims. Very interesting, as you can easily see the sky on your way into AnMat in Half Life. Understandable exaggeration.

unwilling to pay for a helicopter ride out to Black Mesa. The car ride had to be MISERABLE.

Barney likes safety!

Colleague.

laughs nervously when people are annoyed in his general area

clapping and shouting at Barney usually wakes him up

vaults over a desk for the purpose of politely disposing of his trash. unbothered by someone admonishing him. vaults back out

"I'm not in a rush" your Tram is in Eight Minutes

e2

cards... in the dark. silly.

yeah why IS that guard wearing an HEV suit

works in Sector G, as a robotics engineer

missed his train :(

thinks himself to be the youngest scientist in the building. Despite knowing Barney, who considers Gordon a friend. Interesting!

LIKES DR GREEN. MAN WITH GOOD TASTE

will definitely be late. Usually isn't, but worries over what'll be done because he's late.

let the man have his break

thinks some rooms are just needlessly large

doesn't call the VOX the VOX

gets a tad rude when someone asks after something that has just been answered

even while openly panicking, doesn't emote too much vocally

not sure how to act in this situation but does try to get Out of the tram serving as a barrier between him and the bullsquid

snaps at someone shooting at the thing, for whatever reason

e3

just had cpr performed on him. If his chest hurts that's probably because his RIBS are BROKEN. Headache is likely the Head Injury That Knocked Him Out

unconcerned by the blood around him

gman sighting,, LEAVE RYAN ALONE

feels like he Should be panicking but ultimately Isn't.

hates roaches :( respects them but doesn't like them

ignores strange noise. Ryan would survive a horror movie

gman i promise you don't want to hire this guy (lying)

not jazzed at dusty/bloody vent but doesn't complain overmuch about the cleanliness

points out that the vents are cold. Makes sense, he was just out driving not too long ago, perceptually

smoke in the vents! Coughing fit at very little smoke!

seems uncurious about a pistol in the vents, and is pretty cheery about laying hands on it

"yessirre"

"hi rat :)"

focused on his labcoat getting dirty. I can commiserate. That's his favourite bit of clothing if he's always wearing it.

does startle easily, but doesn't linger on awful things

decent ability to climb

jokes about dangerous torrent of water being a waterslide and walks around it with very little hesitation

only sounds mildly stressed when he falls into it

doesn't like freezing water. L

end card!!!! :D original art!!!

e4

Makes an odd analogy about the building being alive

Overall unconcerned about a bunch of mutilated humanoids, other than thinking them unfriendly and to be avoided

Wants some manner of weapon. Gets hit in the face by a headcrab and bemoans the lack further

Continues nervous laughter. Would rather be hallucinating than actually be near a gargantuar.

Considers his "happy place" to be facts about the Tau cannon. Spits those facts out in an effort to ignore all the headcrab zombies

He works on the Tau cannon! Or does so often enough to be able to alter its functionality

Has his own lab? May simply share a lab space with others but consider it his

Ignores horror over a corpse in favour of the bulletproof vest right next to it. Also searches the body for a gun. Pragmatic.

Considers his luck poor

A tad sarcastic when he's able to be

Content to swing a crowbar around like a baseball bat

Emotes the most vocally he has all series when complaining about being in pain

Feels wrong to kill the zombies. Decides he won't.

Jumps a gap, barely clears it, and does that with no hesitation or comment.

Seems to be right handed in the official art. I'd be interested to see if there's a Mindverse character that's left handed.

e5

His flashlight is a shake-to-charge sort

Vocally distressed at seeing a barnacle eat someone

Despite that, jokes about the eaten man's death

His lab is in the biology department, but he remains uninterested in biology

Takes off the vest with no hesitation. Very decisive man.

Continues to laugh when barely avoiding death

Electrical issues are a common occurrence at Black Mesa

Unbothered by taking a Snickers bar off of a dead man

Thinks first of a pizza when hungry

Keeps taking head injuries.

Reconsiders his initial reaction to some Thing, and rephrases by running and yelling.

Has to catch his breath after running from it

e6

Had to live in a storage unit for a while. His his bed behind a stack of boxes. The unit proper was always miserably cold.

Hates the idea of beating the zombies to death, but thinks he could shoot them.

Doesn't want to leave an injured man behind. Accepts the logic presented to him, though.

Continues to avoid killing things when he can avoid doing so

Carries on ignoring any bodies unless he thinks they have something to offer him

Doesn't care overmuch about the aliens.

The alarm that goes off here, and throughout all of Unforseen Consequences, is an alert of structural damage.

Hasn't been running for any of this. He isn't used to physical exertion.

Once tried to hack the announcement system for April Fool's. Failed. Impressed a guard is able to manage it

Takes a shotgun despite weight concerns, on account of it being a shotgun

Has clearance level four

Kills someone on accident. Promptly starts thinking in loops

e6.5

Has two opened cans of Squirt next to his laptop.

Bought a laptop on May 17, 1995, while in college/university.

Has no regrets about buying a laptop worth half his student debt. (Prin adjusted this for inflation and discovered that his laptop is around $3000, nowadays.)

e7

The framing of the opening shot suggests Ryan has been sitting quietly for some time, thinking about having killed someone.

His model is also very nice.

Attempting to rationalize the manslaughter away

He does have his phone on hand.

Injures his leg in an elevator crash

Panics while in a dangerous situation, but calms down pretty much immediately afterwards

Worried he's sustaining hearing damage, but holds priority at not dying

His bones audibly creak when he lands a jump. Complains about it, but doesn't sound like he's in pain

Likes that nothing can follow him into an air vent

Practically flies up the ladder, makes no mention of his leg bothering him on it

Just happy to be alive.

Accepts he has to leave people behind if he wants to survive this, and isn't happy about it

His phone, a Nokia, accepts calls by payment plan.

Todd Arlen has just called him. I've yet to watch Arlen's Mind, so this doesn't mean much to me, yet.

Todd has escaped Black Mesa, and seems surprised that Ryan hasn't. I'd say this suggests Ryan has lost substantial amounts of time to his assorted head injuries.

Silent when he hears he's at risk of being on-site when a nuke is dropped on the facility. Brushes it off when Todd asks after him.

Calls Todd by his last name primarily.

Outraged and afraid about the nuke.

Believes he's going to die.

Overall! the autism headcanons are primed for this guy. i like how much he seems to react to everything happening around him with around the same level of mild nervousness. unfortunately he is running around with broken ribs and later an injured leg that he KEEPS PUTTING WEIGHT ON. shakes him violently. please be careful i understand you have no better options right now but at least brace against a wall

[kasaneteto]

so today has really sucked ive just been sitting around randomly crying all day. i haven’t really been able to eat anything or do much of anything. just sat around scrolling or watching shit. wish my new boss would send me my schedule so i can motivate myself to get back into a routine.

im ok tho. ive been thinking a lot about me and finn (thank you hazel for our talk i love yew 🫶) and reminding myself why i needed to break up with them both for them & for myself. but at the same time wishing i could have made it work. but there’s just no way, we needed space. we still need space. last night is evidence enough of that. but nobody makes me feel comfortable like they do. nobody makes me feel loved and appreciated like they do.

the thing ive been thinking about is how understood they made me feel. im not sure we can perfectly understand each other. it’s tricky because something i love about finn is their unique perspective on literally everything. theres nobody on this earth who thinks like finn does. but at the same time… sometimes i just don’t get them & they don’t get me. it can be really frustrating sometimes. they make assumptions about my behavior a lot, & maybe i make assumptions about theirs too but im not sure.

for example i was talking to them about something awkward i did recently and when i told them something i had said they were like “devin……. you should NOT have said that…… you’re trying so hard to be normal that you’re being really not normal” and it really stung that they said that because like… im not trying to be normal at all. i know that what i said & did was super abnormal. i don’t care about whether or not the things i do are normal anymore. i did it because i was being true to myself. so for them to say that im “trying so hard to be normal” that its having the opposite effect was like… idk. in that moment it made me feel like they didnt understand me at all. but seeing it from their perspective… maybe thats how they live around other people… because i know they worry a lot about what other people think and are worried about people thinking theyre weird. it makes me worry for them & their self esteem.

but anyways. they’re all ive been thinking about all day and its been impossible to not feel like ive made a mistake by ending our relationship. i know theres someone out there who would love me as much as finn but will i be able to love them as much as i love finn? i just dont know. its hard to picture. but i have to remind myself why i ended it. we were bringing out the worst in each other and holding each other back. maybe it could work again in the future but it wasnt working now. i have to remind myself. it wasn’t working.

so idk. hopefully ill start this new job soon & it’ll be great and i’ll be able to find out what i want. because i still can’t even tell if im monogamous or not 😭

[queenie-says-free-palestine]

Hi! I came across your blog and wanted to offload some feelings, I hope you don't mind.

I've been kinda aware of the situation in Palestine for a few years now (However I am sure that there is A LOT more I don't know) I'm from Western Europe, I'm sure you're aware of how little concern there was and is for Palestinian here. My stomach just dropped when I turned on the news this past weekend. The first thing I saw was the Israeli president proclaiming war. I felt horrified, I knew that whatever Hamas had done, the Palestinian people would be punished for it. It's terrible what happened to the Israeli people, of course, but the entire western world doesn't seem to acknowledge, accept or even care about the fact that those in Palestine are living in an 'Apartheid system'

I've seen videos of kids being 'roughed up' by Israeli military, old people forced from homes they've lived in for generations. They have been suffering for decades like this. Why is it okay for them to be treated like this? Because they're brown? Muslim? I'm sorry if that's a controversial thing to say, but I can't think of any other reason for it. It is both heartbreaking and infuriating.

I wish the western world just cared, if only a little bit. We have been bombarded with 'Israel the victim' narrative, there is some reporting about what they are doing to Gaza (cutting aid etc) and it's generating a little sympathy but not enough to change the overall narrative. Those who publicly support 'Free Palestine' are painted as antisemitic at best, a terrorist sympathizer at worst.

I'm sick of it!

Forgive me if I've got anything wrong here, but this is the opinion I've come to from what I've seen/read. Feel free to correct me.

Thanks for letting me vent.

sorry, i meant to reply to this when you sent it but ive been so busy 😭😭

im glad you feel that my blog is a safe space to vent :) and no worries, im fine w you feeling the need to spill all this. if anything im somewhat honored you chose my blog !

i will be expanding on some notes you said, but trigger warning for graphic depictions of violence. also notable that if people will get triggered at the very ideas of these things, at seeing them as words or on screens, then imagine those who face this in their every day lives, who have faced this every day for decades. you can choose not to read and not get triggered and move on. they dont have a choice.

the first thing id mention is that you mention how the condemnation is "why is it okay for them to be treated like this? because theyre brown? muslim?" and as a brown muslim, yes this is exactly why its okay for them to be treated like this. the west has made it clear for decades that muslims are terrorists or plane hijackers or bombers and they should be disciplined and indoctrinated, and arabs are either oil money bilionaires or robbers or sex objects who live in tents and dont use cars because they have camels. thats why white ukrainians are defending themselves but brown palestinians are terrorists

but also keep in mind that minorities such as arab christians are just as threatened, especially due to a lack of awareness about the fact that theres actually a large number of christians in arabia, and the christian communities in the middle east are some of the oldest in the world, with the ones in palestine able to date back to the birth of the church. in fact, arab christians are almost condemned more than arab muslims because people tend to blow them off because theyre arab christian and somewhat alien to other people.

not to mention that people have the nerve to say palestinians should die bc the majority are muslims and want to kill infidels and queers. what of the queer palestinians? im friends with palestinians irl and two of them are queer. are they excused from the massacre but their families should die? and its sad that this next sentence might be controversial, but even homophobes dont deserve to be slaughtered. yes, i said it.

next, this is smth that angers me, not what you said, but the fact that its so unknown. youve seen videos of "kids being 'roughed up' by israeli military, old people forced from homes theyve lived in for generations". i promise you, anon, this is the tip of the iceberg. scroll far enough, esp on twitter under the hashtag #freepalestine. the things ive seen will stay with me forever. the things youll see if you look far enough, i promise, you wont be able to comprehend how people who witness this every day can still have the will to live.

if you scroll far enough, youll see videos of women screaming in pain as they watch their homes getting bulldozed. youll see a video of a hearing impaired palestinian girl running, only to get hit in the face w a stun grenade. shes only eleven years old. youll see videos of a boy, only about six, eyes wide and staring off, silent as the person holding the camera urges him to speak and shakes him. youll see a father crying over his sons body after finding it among the dead. youll see a boy running through a crowd, screaming and crying for his dad, only to find his fathers corpse being held up by the people in front. youll find people being pulled out from rubble. youll find a boy pointing at his little sister and saying "look at the blood on her feet." youll see videos of people being held hostage in al aqsa mosque, the third holiest site in islam, by the idf. they did nothing but pray. youll see a man holding a dead fetus, saying that its mother was killed. youll see a father vlogging what life is like in gaza, he buys gifts for his daughters for eid but they keep hiding under pillows thinking that theyre going to get bombed and he has to reassure them and hug them. he died a few days later. youll see two children being held by an idf soldier as they cry and swear they havent done anything. youll see a palestinian girl gesturing towards destroyed buildings behind her and saying "you see all of this. what do you expect me to do, fix it? im only ten." youll see a woman talking about how her two and a half year old son, who was shot by israeli soldiers, was loved by everyone and he loved everyone. youll see a group of men in the middle of prayer, refusing to stop even when they hear israeli missiles hitting. they flinch but they dont stop praying. 

and what of the incidents that didnt get recorded? these are just from the last decade or so. what of the sixty five years before that? this is what i call terrorism. the hijabi on your flight is not a terrorist. the zionists who tells people to leave the land they grew up in, the land their ancestors grew up in? THATS who the the terrorist here.

and even those who dont get killed are terrorized. there are people who have to sign in with checkpoints any time they enter or leave their own home. theyre arrested by the idf for no reason and interrogated for hours.

i would also like to add a point. palestinians arent punished for hamas's crimes. palestinians are punished for being palestinians. people could argue that "oh, israels trying to attack hamas, the civilians are collateral damage, thats inevitable in war!!!"

bull. shit.

okay fine, lets assume that, ethically speaking, its morally just to level all of gaza with the aim of exterminating hamas. lets assume that its not morally questionable to do so, and lets assume that it doesnt violate international law. let me steal the argument of bassem youssef from when he debated w piers morgan:

lets assume hamas doesnt exist. lets assume theres a world where hamas doesnt exist in palestine, and lets call this world the west bank. ... whats the excuse for killing palestinians in the west bank?

(he said smth of the sort, im not sure these were his exact words)

why would you kill palestinians in the west bank, where there isnt hamas, and say that its "collateral damage" from a war w hamas? its thinly veiled racism, i promise you

the slightly more fortunate news is that the world seems to be waking up. there are protests, even in the west, in support of palestine. al jazeera news has an article abt places that have held protests in solidarity w palestine (the link is here) and a lot of them are in western/european countries. even jews are protesting, i remember seeing a video (its kinda old tho maybe two years old ??) of a jewish guy saying "we are embarassed of whats happening in the state of israel, in the jewish name" and that palestinians "shouldnt give up the struggle" (the video is here)

unfortunately, where i live, no protests can be held, but maybe if theres any near you, anon, you can show some love by attending :) and if there arent then you can simply donate (only if you can, obviously)

sorry this ramble is so long hahaha its just that your ask allowed me to let out some bottled up feelings of my own

[charleslebatman]

hi bestie!

i have been thinking for sometime if i should send this or not but i decided to do it.

i saw all the alexandra twitter likes when people find out her account and before she deleted it; and i remember thinking "humm theres A LOT to unpack here"

first of all - her oldests twitter likes (from 2019 that i think that was when she created it) were the problematic ones that you have the screenshots of. I agree with everything you said about it and you, who is directly affected by that law, have every right to be mad and angry with her. - im not gonna defend her on this. in the same time frame she also liked a tweet from a very weird account but the content was fine (they were talking about the importance of different cultures in society) - and i checked at the time and she didnt follow the account so 🤷🏼‍♀️.

but i have to said it to be totally fair: her other likes (from 2021- 2023) are so different from the problematic ones . Like, it shows a totally different view about the world and politics. I remember she liked tweets heavily criticizing piers morgan and the way he talks about meghan markle and antiracist suff . and yes she liked tweets about the war (ukraine and afghanistan) but the tweets weren't making fun of it (like so many people said) - in my perception it was about the dirty politics and the powerfull people and countries interests behind it (and i 100% agree with them tbh) i don't have any screenshots of it so i can't prove what im saying but istg that i have no reason to lie about it and its mostly based in my own opinions its ok if people desagree.

and in the middle of it she also liked stuff about ecole du louvre - so i think that was the turning point for her. it is common for people to go through certain changes in ideals and conceptions when they go to college. you mature and start to see things with another mentality. so maybe she changed?

idk, it is like you and other besties said before - she is a rich and privileged girl so -im disappointed but not surprised - that she liked some problematic stuff and if she changed thats good for her.

we can talk about more about it if you feel like it (because i know its not a easy subject for you and i don't wanna push it too much).

anyways, thanks for creating a safe space that everyone can share their opinnions, bestie :) 😶‍🌫️

Sincerely, I don't care if her other likes are true or not. I've seen enough with this retirement law. I could talk for hours about the consequences. About how it's enough to show that she's not as kind and gentle as we're led to believe.

How it disgusts me to see someone liking the very first one on l’Echo de la Boucle, but I'm also going to annoy people. It's not just political opinions, she's making fun through this like of people who are going to kill themselves at work and of women for whom this law is very sexist.

The first tweet said, "working more will make you younger" basically. Even the rich unionists were against this law. It's the first time that so many unions were in agreement. There were real scenes worthy of war. Perhaps other French people will tell you I'm exaggerating, except that we tend to take a lot of things in a humorous tone to put things into perspective.

I'm quite surprised that so few talk about it. I guess because it's related to Charles and it's hard to imagine him dating someone like that. I've said it many times, I love Charles but he's no angel or saint.

Plus, thanks bestie I’m glad to learn you’re feeling safe here. ❤️

[stamplerfag]

things im too cowardly to say off anon

am so glad i found ur tumblr again after your got sussed

your dndads art on twitter is what introduced me to the series and piqued my interest enough that when i saw it mentioned one (1) time on tumblr i was like "oh yeah i should check that out" and fell in deep

i looooooove ur willy takes, willy's one of my favorite characters in the series and i nod to your opinons

willyscary is absolutely my dndads otp and seeing you post about em had me doing a little run around in my room, fucking love those two. yes be horrible to your step-granddaughter. manipulate her harder. did you know that he canonically says "you can call me daddy" to her and she canonically jacked off the day she met him. im not joking the sauce is Rich and Delicious

stamplerfreaks AND oakfreaks unite

YOUU. IM GLAD YOU FOUND ME TOO IT WAS. perhaps not wise of me to post my art here. shame. im looking at it as a chance to restart my shit, anyhow..... (ill find somewhere to host everything eventually -__-)

that makes me so happy to hear?? i have a few persistent people to thank for getting me into podcast as well and every time i think about it in retrospect im like "oh my god im so glad i followed through, this thing is my heart and soul." lifechanging, no joke. continue to spread the gospel...... i need more perverts to talk abt dadson w........

WILLYHEADS RISE UP‼️‼️ UMM. HES SO. the fact that he affects me as much as he does is deeply embarrassing. genuinely genuinely obsessed. there are NOT enough of us. i could go on forever if i was allowed. (if you ever have anything else to say abt him please im begging.....) he fucking sucks so much dude i need to suck him off.

i am so fucking. im chomping at the bit to read more willyscary transcripts.... its so fucking textbook and delicious.... theres some part of me thats paranoid abt something s2 related taking up too much space in my brain, like thats a betrayal somehow, (and tbh every time i read about them i. get so excited it makes me manic. this relationship was designed in a lab to make me violently horny) but fucking. the two things that you just said are actually making me incredibly. fluttery about it and i dont even. know what to do oh god VGHHHFJJNGN!!!!! imkicking my feet & squealing !!!!. ive been meaning to draw them i promise........ whenever i feel motivated... i need him to cum on her tits (and many. and a lot of other things aswell)

OAKFREAK STAMPLERFREAK I SEE NO DIFFERENCE...... LOVE IS LOVE... WE GOTTA STICK TOGETHER....... 💋 PLEASE youre always welcome to bring your takes here !!!!!!!!

[foxfairy06]

ok this might be a long one but theres something specific i see most transmeds say that i dont understand

so. obviously a lot of transmeds are anti-nonbinary, so thanks for not being one of those types! however, i take issue with the idea that you can only be nonbinary if youre dysphoric

assuming "nonbinary" just as, like, an alternative to male/female (simplifying nb identity for the sake of argument), why would someone need to have body dysphoria? social dysphoria around names/titles/pronouns is one thing, but needing physical dysphoria seems inconsistent

like. say you have "Sean", an AFAB nonbinary person. Sean is dysphoric and wants a flat chest and the effects of testosterone.

and you also have "Charlie", an AMAB nonbinary person. Charlie has exactly the same sense of gender as Sean does, including how they want to look. As such, Charlie is non-dysphoric, as they already have a flat chest and a deep voice/beard/etc

if you need dysphoria to be nonbinary, why should Charlie be excluded from the label when their gender is the same as Sean's?

I'm aware that, for some, socisl dysphoria is enough to "count" as trans. But the majority of (allegedly) nonbinary inclusive transmeds claim that body dysphoria is required (and ive been here since 2012 - ive spoken to a LOT of transmeds)

to me, it feels like transmed ideology waters down nonbinary identity, even those of the nonbinary people they claim to accept, for the sake of trying to find a reason people are trans. paradoxically, it feels like they see nb people as man-lite/woman-lite, while still denying that someone can identify as nonbinary men or nonbinary women.

sorry its so long lol, this has just bothered me for a long time and im yet to get an internally consistent answer

The issue is because we believe there are binary bodies, and a male body is not nonbinary. In order to be dysphoric for a nonbinary body, using agender or nullsex as an example, you would want an androgynous voice, an AMAB enby might use estrogen, and AFAB enby might use testosterone. Yes, an AFAB might want top surgery, and an AMAB wouldn't, but they're both just as binary, because transition isn't limited to top dysphoria. Charlie, unless he experiences a strong dysphoria regarding his self social perception, which is based not on gender roles, but how you perceive others to perceive you in relation to your sex, would not be nonbinary, they would be cis. Nonbinary isn't an "alternative identity", it's just an existence that doesn't meet one of the poles of the binary based gender spectrum, which is based in a series of sexual traits.

I'd also like to point out that supporting enban isn't at all rare among transmedicalists, it just depends on the source. Most nonradical transmed consider excluding enben a radical belief. r/transmedical is an example of a radical space and r/truscum is not, for example.

[loversj0y]

im crying over techno again (this is long and sad im sorry)

i miss him so much man. i hope he knows how much he did for all of us. ive been rewatching old wilbur videos and seeing him in them brings me so much bittersweet joy. he meant so much to all of us. i hope he knows the ways he changed us.

he was my final push to start streaming. i was inconsolable the night he died. the week after i kept thinking about how long i’d pushed off the idea because i simply didn’t think i had the time. something about losing someone that you even just perceive as being close to you gives such a shift in perspective that i figured at that point it’d be stupid not to. and the thing is, he was so incredibly supportive. of every last one of us. he always supported the people in his community.

its a big thing in my life honestly to live in his memory. usually people say stuff like that in a negative connotation but i dont think its negative. i hold his memory close to me as a reminder of the things that ive lost. and its a comfort in a sense to let his deadpan mockery push me to be better and to do things i might fear doing.

he has a space on my ofrienda. i pray to him in the same way i pray to all the family i have lost because even without knowing him personally, he welcomed us all enough to allow me to feel like there was a family with him when my own felt incendiary and volatile.

i think about the fact that lovejoy is playing a festival with the killers. its a festival im incredibly excited to go to, but on nights like this when im crying over a lost brother i never had, i feel saddened in knowing how much he would have loved to have seen it. i think he will be there, watching. but the feeling wont be the same. i think of how wilbur must feel. knowing that he’s playing a festival with the same band that he’s not only loved, but that he shared his love for with techno, to the point that it made such a strong lasting impression on techno. i hope he knows how proud techno is of him. i hope that if he stays to watch the killers perform, he feels techno with him. because i know he’ll be there.

i have a lot of thoughts on how much he meant to me, to all of us, and im kind of just pouring them out in a stream not unlike the tears that wont seem to stop tonight. if i can be honest, ive been avoiding a lot of stuff related to techno. i took a step back from everything as a whole because it hurt too much and i didnt know what to make of it, not really. i keep finding myself mourning how little time i got to have as an active techno watcher, given how recently i joined the fandom and such, but i also know i should rather feel thankful for every second that i got to have. i find myself avoiding a lot of mentions of technodad still. he’s lovely and he means so much to all of us, just like his son, but i cant help but feel my chest reopen each time i hear him speak about his son. ive seen the feeling of watching a person you love mourn a family member who was taken too young personally. ive seen it in my own family with my cousin, and it all feels so heavy. i know there is this narrative of being thankful for the time we had with a person. but i still consistently find myself balanced on the precipice of anger and acceptance. i dont struggle with bargaining or depression, let alone denial. i know hes gone. i know nothing will change that. but i also will never be content in feeling appreciative of the time we had because we could have had more time. even if it was just a. second more. it wouldnt change things but maybe it would ease the ache in my heart as i think on all of the people who loved him who will live past him, myself included.

i keep coming back to the song life worth missing by car seat headrest. i cant quite explain where i find the parallels but i feel it in this delicate balance that i find in the song. theres this delicate balance between grieving and losing yourself in grief and im not that sure that ive found it. for a control freak, one of the things that always has hurt me is my lack of control in death. i cant change it. and all i can control is the way to cope but i simply dont know how to do that. and the temperamental part in my head is the battle i find myself fighting because i know how he wouldnt want this. he wouldnt want the heavy grief but i dont know how to not feel it. i find myself feeling the heavy grief or essentially nothing at all.

and theres quiet, kind moments throughout it all. when i think maybe i can hold his memory and move with it. but those moments dont last long. but they mean more than any other part of this whole process. when i hear him in my head, making fun of me for not putting myself out there. when i feel him supporting me as i feel unstable and shaky. regardless of your thoughts on religion or my own, i know that he is there. whether it is real or it is in my head, both are substantial enough to give me faith. and isnt that religion in and of itself?

i know that all the things we wanted him to know, about how he changed us, how much he meant to us, all of it. i know that he knows them. but i still am allowed to mourn that we never got to feel him know them. am i allowed?

i think im allowed. i think he’d allow it. i think he’d understand.

because when i feel whatever sense might lie in my convoluted ideas of religion and my strong sense of morality, i know one thing above all.

that he understands.

[steviecrowdude]

Im starting to get followers now! Yaay!

I do want to lay some stuff out though, to potentially set in stone expectations for followers.

I reblog whatever i see that i wanna reblog. I may forget to tag things, but i try to if i have enough energy and it really needs tagging. This includes memes and funny stuff, but also just stuff i find important.

I am a trans man. Binary trans man (edit: to yall at least, behind the curtain I'm fuckin around with gender). No connection to womanhood other than the fact i dont publicly pass. He/him. If theres anyone out there who decides to come here and try and tell me im a sad woman or something, no. You dont know me, i know myself. Welcome to my blog.

I dont do that trans gatekeeping stuff. You fuck with gender? Ya trans (if you want. We also love gnc people here. Also you dont need to id as trans.) Neopronouns and xenogenders are amazing, and contradictory labels are cool as shit. I feel sad i need to clarify that but i do want to.

Im also Aroace and sex repulsed, dont know about the romance repulsed part, but it sounds right. What those things mean to me are private to me.

If you dont have sex, me too dude hell yeah. If you do? Hell yeah dude have fun. I want people to be happy and safe (whatever that means to you) and if youre consenting to it, then i cant think of anything better. (All that to say, dont fuckin, use sex repulsed people to be antikink or something, like c'mon)

Oh, im also autistic, and i have a medley of other mental stuff and neurodivergencies that i have yet to be diagnosed with.

Edit: im also definitely chronically ill in some way so i reblog about physically disabled stuff too

Im gonna reblog things that have to do with that stuff.

I also reblog things i think are important, such as bipoc rights and safety, disabled rights, intersex rights and queer rights in general, safety for everyone, religious freedom and human rights. (Im white, dyadic, and nonreligious, so do tell me if i reblog something thats iffy. Ill be happy to delete it.)

Edit as of January 9th 2024: i feel like i should clarify just because of the rise in antisemitism in the us especially; i dont tolerate that type of stuff. If your support of palestine and people in gaza comes at the cost of your support for jewish people you can leave cuz i dont wanna interact with you. I will advocate for the people in gaza being killed and attempt to uplift their voices, but i will not tolerate antisemitism in the same breath.

Like i mentioned before, if i reblog something and someone following me feels like its fucked up, ill delete it.

I mostly reblog memes and things i find funny.

A lot.

I dont tend to interact with fandom spaces much. But i do enjoy the funny from fandoms, and i reblog fandom content.

Thank you for reading :)

[impunkster-syndrome]

hi wait

I wrote out all the stuff I remember about pluralhub's cult-like behaviors

if you're comfy with it can you PLEASE elaborate because while i sort of just. joined and then let it sit in my serverslist, id like to leave immediately if theres shit like THAT going on there

thank you regardless of whether you end up elaborating or not!

It was mostly me doing this for a server I am on that is not affiliated. I recognized a few members from The Garden and we started talking about it.

I want to add as a disclaimer that many groups will have these traits to a lesser degree. What matters is the impact and reason for doing so. I do think that people do not always set out to create controlling groups, but they can become harmful over time.

I took all criteria from this link right here, so refer to that as I go down the list.

Using this to take a look at pluralhub, and here's what I see:

Behavior control-

12 - Which I think is fair to say is pretty common with how for example the theory of structural dissociation was immediately considered "not how systems work" when it may apply for some because of the guy behind it. In that environment, it was really a "You have to believe the same as everyone else" kind of thing.

13 - Really applies to the "All anti-endos are inherently malicious and out to get you" mentality. This lead to stuff like people who even were friendly to anti-endos getting regarded with scorn.

Information control-

1 - Since a lot of resources were misrepresented and even criticism was intentionally misrepresented. Stereotyping of DID and how much amnesia and what types were enough to count.

2 - Is a big one. There were a handful of known resources widely shared and people were often discouraged from other perspectives. SophieInWonderland was a big blog that was circulated that did often misrepresent critics as well.

4 - With how people are known to get banned for stuff in non-partnered servers.

5 - See one as well, sort of had a "Approved information" thing unofficially. It'd be the same reasons every time. The Harvard thoughtform study, the single bhuddist who said they don't find it appropriative, etc. The anti-endo who pointed out that "tulpa" language is culturally appropriative was discredited for being anti-endo and the points were never truly engaged with in a non-defensive way in the wider plural community as well.

6 - With sources and system information being used against people, like "problematic" fictives, the BeeFox situation (That one is a lot more complex but should have been handled better and not as public from what I know of it), the encouragement of spying and reporting non-hub activity to the hub for bans.

Thought control-

1 - In most spaces you have to prove you're good enough for hub rules and they at times require external socials as proof. The forms for verification can be intrusive.

2 - For things like pressuring "problematic" introjects to change or disavow their source, as well as anyone with memory barriers or amnesia being pushed to get a diagnosis despite the ableism that can come with that

3 - A lot of stereotyping to stop complex conversations, like how common DID stereotyping was.

4 - Questioning -genic stances frequently got you outcasted or sort of unofficially watched.

5 - I sort of count it? Encouraging of introjects of other server members, how quick people would hand over thoughtform resources, the meme that kept giving people new headmates by being an infohazard

6 - Staff are known to lie and misrepresent situations that make the hub look bad, Grey Skies' history of trying to shut down any criticism of the hub itself and the community

8 - Anything critical of the hub was mocked or ignored

9 - Same as 8

10 - Major problem with this and anti-endos. Anti-endos were made out to be either stupid or inherently in the wrong due to their stance, so any points were discarded as "Oh they're anti-endo." The community very frequently poisons the well to try to discredit anyone with different information or stances.

11 - Sort of? it was very centric on "we don't know much about the brain so anything can happen" and I do count that as being able to alter that perception.

Emotional control-

1 - Yes, so often. Any idea of "This person in-sys is causing too much harm and dormancy is not enough" is seen as bad as outerworld murder or if someone chooses to not exist anymore that is a bad thing.

3 - Problems with server atmosphere are always blamed on members

4 - Mostly in situations like 1 but also for not agreeing with server staff, not rejecting a "problematic" source, etc

5 - The "Anyone who is anti-endo is out to get you" idea, the spying, and how you would get cut off from all hub friends if you got banned and most will likely not contact you

6 - Actually happened with us multiple times, usually when someone's system doesn't function like other systems "should" or when questioning the norm

8 - You will lose all your friends and connections in the hub and for a while you were out of the plural community entirely due to how small syscord is. For the start, PH was the first known big hub with no competition until Multiplicity Database came around.

The Garden and high control of the hub in general practically traumatized us into not remembering that.

[poopyballz28]

Kozue Matsumoto Idol AU

This idea has been brewing in my tiny little monkey brain for AGES I love her so much

also sorry i wrote so much i have a lot to say

• She started off obsessing over Hatsune Miku and girl groups, absolutely falling in love with the bubbly type of music and dance styles. She would write demo lyrics in her little pink notebook during school instead of paying attention. She already spaces off during class most of the time and writing down lyrics she thinks are nice really eases her.

• I see her making her own music in her room, instead of just singing something pre-made from a record label. She was super nervous posting her stuff online, but to her surprise one of her songs goes totally viral. The pressure of so much support is incredibly overwhelming for her, but inside she's super happy.

• Her music is also really unique as well. Her lyrics always consist of things in her life she wants to rise up upon, I.E her social anxiety, confidence issues, etc. She puts her whole soul into her music and because of that, it really resonates with people. She garnered a huge and dedicated fanbase for her meaningful music and beautiful vocal performances.

• She was really scared to do live shows, super self conscious about her dancing and just generally showing her face. She knew she wanted to do it though, the thought of singing and dancing to her own music in front of an audience of people who love her traced her thoughts daily, but her anxiety was always a step ahead of her.

• Baki was actually the one who motivated her to do lives. She would vent to him about how embarrassed she was, and how she was afraid of messing up and letting her fans down. He said if they were really her fans, they would support her no matter what. He completely showered her with the confidence she needed and she ended up having her first live show. It was an overwhelming success!

• She's absolutely in love with her idol outfits. Theres never a circumstance where she can wear such fluffy and cute outfits normally, so having a reason to wear such adorable outfits puts her in a super joyful mood. She loves twirling and dancing in them with all her heart. She literally jitters with excitement. (shes so cute oh my GAH)

• She always gets a little nervous before concerts, her anxiety still creeps up on her. Not only is she afraid she may mess up and let everyone down, but she's afraid that one day she'll fall out of style, and people will stop liking her and enjoying her music. Baki is always there to comfort and motivate her though. She couldn't thank him enough for how much he helped her through everything.

• Her performance during live shows are always top notch quality. Her delicate and smooth beautiful voice fills everyone in the venue with butterflies. Her super cute way of dancing and clever choreography she adds throughout could make anyone fall in love with her and what she does. She puts her entire being into every one of her shows, never missing a beat. Her fans see how much effort she puts into her lives and music and praise her up and down for it. (as they should)

• She tends to cry during shows a lot, thanks to all the support from all of her fans. She profusely thanks everyone at her shows for coming to see her perform. Even during meet and greets she's super compassionate. She always gives out hugs and thanks them for everything. She tends to get really emotional whenever she's told how much her music has helped someone too. Knowing her music means so much to other people as much as it means to her, makes her wanna cry.

• She makes all of her merch and live shows super cheap priced, she doesn't do it for the money after all (despite what a manager might tell her) Thanks to her kind attitude, she's completely unproblematic and has little to no haters. Baki may not be very tech savy, but he'll always be the first to defend Kozue when he sees a hate comment on one of her videos. Kozue is really sensitive to hate, tending to question if she's really good at what she does when she sees any, but luckily Baki's always there to show her how much she really matters. (supportive boyfriend hours)

• She's super awkward during photo shoots and stuff. She's embarrassed that she may look silly and doesn't exactly know what to do half the time. Despite how she feels about her nervousness, her fans absolutely adore it. They think she's so undeniably cute for every little awkward thing that she does.

• She begins having little to no confidence in herself, often doubting if she's truly good enough and if she should keep going. But she remarkably forms into a woman who really believes in what she's doing, someone who wants to bring smiles to peoples faces for as long as she lives. She'll confidently chase that dream for as long as it takes, and ultimately get stronger in the process.

I may make a cute little fic abt this too 🤔 perhaps 🧐

[rubberduckyrye]

Just wanted to throw a quick thank you for showing me kindness in this whole thing despite the fact we might not agree on some things! It's refreshing.

Oh hi there! Sorry for the late reply, I have the most abysmal sleep schedule known to man

And really, it's no issue. I am going to suggest that you do your own research into things like fictionkins when you're removed enough from the whole Flowerfell thing and in a better place to be more open minded to learn more about it, but really that's my only gripe. I think you need space first to heal and recover before I can expect you to do that, however, so as long as you're not going and attacking people for being fictionkin, I don't think theres much else I can or should ask for.

Aside from that, I never believe anything without proof. Sanei's counter accusations have only testimony as far as I'm aware, so I'm not going to dismiss them--but to treat them as the undeniable truth would be foolish until there is evidence.

I do hope things settle down, regardless. It sounds like the whole thing with Flowerfell was a huge mess that hurt a lot of people, and the creator hurt a lot of people on top of that.

Take it easy. If you feel up for it, show evidence for your side to the story. It'll be all right.

[smolsammichowo]

Time for a stupid 4 am long post that I’d usually vomit out on twitter but I can type out more shit on tumblr :O

Well uh,

To everyone who has recently followed me on here who is NOT from my Twitter or anywhere else that I linked my tumblr on and just found me from somewhere,

Thanks for following me & also  Sorry for me constantly screaming about random bullshit such as 

- Minecraft Stuff / Minecraft content / Minecraft stream lore / minecraft streamers 

- (note , while I’m not a fan of dream, I have no problem if you are a fan of dream. Just as long as you are kind to others & are kind to me. That should just be common sense really though. ) 

Pro wrestling (Ive mainly talked about AEW & WWE but I do like stuff such as Impact, NJPW, Lucha Underground, Dragon Gate, and a few others! Feel free to dm me some other pro wrestling stuff that you think I’d like too ! ) 

- (note - favorite pro wrestler is a guy named Pac. Gonna confuse the shit out of minecraft people given theres a content creator named Pac as well in the minecraft content creator space lmao. Though the pro wrestler calls himself BASTARD pac as well so I can just call the wrestler BastardPac to not confuse y’all lol ) 

Anime (if I list the animes I like this list would become a fucking dictionary)

Genshin (Tumblr seems SO SO SO SO CALM compared to Twitter , BLESS YOU ALL ) 

Pokemon (seems like a lot of you have followed me from either minecraft or this! Hello! Im doing a pokedex project but i keep redoing it as I keep feeling self concious about my art ; v ; ) 

- Top 5 favorite pokemon not in order are Chikorita, Togekiss, Alolan Raichu,  Koraidon, & Reuniclus

Splatoon (got into the game this year and its like a drug to me now. I adore the paintbrush weapon even though the reef bow is the one Im closest to getting a 5 star on as that one is the money maker ) 

Roblox ( A middle school thing that never left me. Im 23 still playing it. Though its how I made my online persona that is kinda my fursona)

Furry stuff  (o hey speaking of that stuff)

MLP ( Funny enough this ties into above as this was the butterfly effect of me finding the fanbase because of a dumb fanfiction about pinkiepie being hannable lector & making horse cupcakes. ) 

Typing dumb shit at 3 - 4 am in the morning SUCH AS THIS . 

Anyhow I need to stop procrastinating and get a piece of art Ive been working on since yesterday night done. 

Love y’all, just wanted to post a little bit about myself to people who dont really know about me that thought it was a good idea to follow me. 

[looking-cool-joker]

I watched half of Skinamarink and I have a lot to say on it.

Can’t understand what is happening or what they are saying

11:36 Scenes last for too long without ANYTHING happening

11:56: Things seem to just happen for no reason or any way to understand what is happening

12:50 whos Kevin?? I think I only saw one child, so if theres two, why didn’t you show both???

14:18 Dark scenes and Hallways the movie :/

15:44 Weird suspense doesn’t make a movie scary, you need more than that.

17:44 Is the dad dead or??? They don’t explain anything!!! I’m almost twenty minutes in, give me something!!!!!!

20:30 Are the lights going to suddenly turn off?

20:39 Kinda

21:07 I get they’re kids, but why is the dialogue so spaced out :((

22:20 this really is the movie huh. re: 14:18

23:23: SOUNDS DON’T MAKE A MOVIE SCARY OR ENTICING, ITS JUST SOUNDS, DARK ROOMS AND HALLWAYS THE MOVIE.

24:25 Oh yeah, also “Dad” the movie

24:58 Left for an hour because I was tired of this movie, the entire screen is black, what is happening.

25:43 I’m getting tired of lights suddenly turning off and revealing a dark hallway

25:52: oh look actual people, haven’t seen that in a while.

26:16 Theres just audio from the TV playing as people go in and out of a dark room. How is this scary? Or honestly just enjoyable?

27:19 You can tell this movie was made in eight days (derogatory)

28:08 Alright, I’m tired of the audio being too quiet/incoherent so thank god for subtitles, secondly, “Why is mom crying?” Well why does this movie not explain anything

It is so infuriating, I get having a loose story but come on??? This movie sucks so badly, why was this even made I hate every second of this, its just nothing.

29:21 LOUD NOISES DON’T MAKE A MOVIE SCARY OH MY GOD STOP BEING QUIET AND THEN BE SO LOUD ITS NOT SCARY ITS ANNOYING.

32:36 LMAO THE TOILET JUST APPEARED AND ITS SUPPOSED TO BE SCARY. This movie is making me lose my head.

32:40 Nvm its gone again

32:49 I may sound like a broken record but theres just, not enough happening to justify long scenes. Dialogue is sparse, which could be an okay thing, when you are looking at either a white wall or a pitch black room, its just so slow. Two minutes feel like an hour, and whats worse is that the story is so hard to understand, it doesn’t even feel like a story.

Its just kids saying “Dad” or Kevin repeating Kaylees name, which maybe they will actually say something of importance, but its just tiring.

32:55: STOP HAVING JUMPSCARES THEY JUST FAIL AT SCARING ME.

34:08 And I’m tired of the grain effect, and I hate the static, it’d be fine IF SOMETHING WAS HAPPENING TO DISTRACT ME FROM THE HEADACHE IM GETTING FROM HEARING IT

35:31 re: 32:55 and 29:21

38:20 dont you just love a dark room with someones legs being abled to be seen and thats just the scene, nothing more???

38:32 OH LOOKEE ANOTHER HALLWAY THATS DARK.

38:47 We all love a filtered voice :)

41:24 “I can’t see anything” Neither can I

43:33 I wish this was anything else, I would rather be watching Mandela Catalogue rn, at least its somewhat scary and I can parse whats happening.

45:56: It really isn’t a good sign that theres an hour of this movie left and I’m think about ditching it, this isn’t fun, this isn’t scary, this isn’t interesting. It sucks so badly, when I say I want to watch anything else I mean it. I WANT TO WATCH ALADDIN 2019 OVER THIS, THAT IS HOW BAD IT IS

47:20 re: 35:31

49:27 So whats with the dad, why should i care about the kids, why should I care about the mother. Why should I care about this movie? They don’t give me anything, stuff just happens, dad was there now hes not, kid fell down the stairs nvm he’s fine now, mom tells them to close their eyes she disappears.

What does it mean, I don’t think it means anything, I think this story is too vague, to a point where I don’t think there is one. Focusing on legos doesn’t help me parse anything. It doesn’t help. Looking at a TV playing old cartoons doesn’t give me anything, them moving a couch DOESNT GIVE ME ANYTHING.

I understand that abstract art is well.. Abstract, but this is just, pointless. There is no story, or at least they don’t want to show me the story, they want to show me kids calling out for their dad who may or may not be missing.

But thats the thing, I know nothing, BECAUSE THIS MOVIE TELLS ME NOTHING

The cinematography isn’t even good for crying out loud! Its boring, its the same five angles in different rooms. And again I’m tired of the static and the grain.

It feels like a worse P.T, but thats an insult to even compare it to a Hideo Kojima work.

51:41 This movie likes to pretend its building up suspense, but the suspense is “Whens the next loud noise” or possibly even “Whens the next the audio will cut out?” Its not scary, it’ll never be scary.

This is around half of the movie, It won’t get any better so I’ve heard and I hate it. I’m leaving it here. But I’ll watch the final scene

1:37:26 Finally they changed the color, instead of the color black its dark red, such an improvement :)

1:38:37 Pitch Black with a face in the static, vaguely creepy but, It just sucks because the rest sucks

1:38:45 “Go To Sleep” Shut up with your stupid Jeff The Killer cliches.

Final thoughts: Complete waste of my time and one of the worst movies I’ve watched. 0/10

[girl4pay]

Hi ! feel free 2 ignore.

i’m a nanny and my 3 yr old today threw a tantrum where she ended up biting and scratching me and pulling out a chunk of my hair. she’s not usually like this and it was pretty shocking. if one of your kiddos did this, what would you do to like, discourage such violence in the future but also support the kiddo? i didnt know what to do i just told her firmly that she wasnt allowed to hurt people and gave her some space and she calmed down a bit after a while.

omg first of all i’m sorry that happened! i think when it comes out of nowhere and feels so shocking it’s really hard to deal w! tbh what you did sounds a lot like what i would do. the thing w violent tantrums esp at the age you’re talking about is they are inevitable. like you can do all the soft transition periods and emotional validation in the world (and you should!) but violent tantrums are still going to happen bcus age 2-4 is when kids are figuring out that they have the ability be violent intentionally in reaction to their emotional experience. so theres things you can do generally overall to make them secure in their power and agency that they don’t feel the need to exercise violence bcus they’ve learned they can use their words and know they’ll be listened to and respected, and then there’s things you can do in the moment to convey the same.

in general w tantrums i try to stay about 1.5-3 feet away from the kid. far enough they don’t feel threatened, close enough they don’t feel abandoned. i think it helps to treat it as routine - level voice, observational remarks. offer them familiar things like a favorite toy or a pillow (not something that will hurt when thrown lmao). if you’re in a place you think is making the tantrum worse (loud, overwhelming, whatever) explain this to them and offer them a this or that choice on how you can move (‘you can hold my hand or walk alone, we can go to the bathroom or move outside’ etc) unless the kid is physically unsafe do not move them against their will - being ignored and made to feel impotent is like, surefire recipe for escalation. yes this means you might have to be uncomfortable and feel judged in a public space unfortunately. if they are physicaly unsafe, narrate that. ‘i know you’re upset. i know you don’t want to be touched right now. i had to move us because xyz. i’m putting you down now and i won’t touch you anymore.’ i have found quietly humming a song that’s familiar to them like twinkle twinkle, wheels on the bus, classroom type songs is grounding and makes them aware you’re present with them without stressing them out.

once the tantrum has escalated to violence, its really important to remember that rn is not the time to be like teaching lessons. keeping it simple is best. “(kids name), i understand you are feeling angry/upset. (violent action) is not an appropriate reaction and i need you to stop” thank them for listening when they do stop. don’t bring moral judgements or appeals to empathy into it. i find it helps to loosely hold both their hands - like, put my pointer finger under their hand and hold it there w my thumb so it’s like they’re holding my hand instead of the other way around lmao? idk but it works. it’s grounding and it brings them back out of their heads. if they struggle against it, say something like ‘i’m holding your hand because you were doing x. are you ready to stop doing x?” if they say yes let them go and move back away again.

AFTER the tantrum is a really important time i think and when its most likely you’ll be able to convey like a lesson about violence. i’ll literally do like a postmatch breakdown w them and talking it out, usually while doing another activity like coloring or a walk or something. ‘earlier you were very overwhelmed. i noticed when you were feeling that way, you did xyz. did you feel better or worse when i did abc? i’m proud of you for using your words/asking for time to yourself/whatever. when i feel angry/sad/whatever, sometimes i want to (violent action) did you feel like that too?’ in general just connecting with them, bringing things to their attention. depending on the kid three might be a little young for them to fully focus on this. if their attention starts drifting let it happen. you don’t want this to feel punitive, it needs to be a space where they can express themselves and understand that their experiences are normal. don’t force an apology, and if they do apologize thank + forgive them. the last thing i think can help is when you are feeling frustrated or angry, you can acknowledge it and then draw attention to what you’re doing in reaction or as a result of that feeling!

[katharine-hepburn]

do you think it would be a good idea for the show to take the book route and have daneil end up with marius by the end? do you have any thoughts on their relationship?

thank you for the incredibly interesting question!! im gonna kinda try to work out my thoughts as i type:

i think it really depends on a lot of things. well actually first of all lets back up. i do think daniel and armand are back together by the end of the books. both textual evidence wise (go girl give us one sentence!!) and bc my sappy heart cannot handle an alternative. so ill kinda answer the question of do i think the show should have them…get together? cohabitate? shack up??

i guess ill get into my answer for the second part and say that i dont think it’s like a permanent relationship for either of them. no matter what one thinks the exact nature of their relationship was. i do think daniel (no one could possibly care about spoiling books theyll never read right) needs a safe space to get back on an even keel but that there isnt a lot drawing him to marius besides that. i mean think about what daniel likes and what excites him. and even for marius like okay sure he could probably stick with the same mentee or whatever for a long time because that makes him feel good but is that really what would be most fulfilling? im like. fine that they were hanging out for so long and who knows fucking sucking being in love like all these vampires are (but okay kinda insanely funny for two of the blonds to get together. like.) it helped daniel uncrazy and im glad h had someone there for him when armand couldnt be but i am never gonna be super into a relationship between one of my most and one of my least favorite characters in the series.

as for the show, theres a lot to consider. would they put this right after the queen of the damned plot? how? what would the circumstances of old man resigned to his fate daniel being turned be? if not right then, right before they do prince lestat? are they gonna get that far? are they going to do all the books as discreet seasons and are they going to be largely faithful? is there anyone on earth who would want that? but then how much will we know about marius by then? only what we know from lestat and from marius’ own actions in the timeline of the show? daniel being old definitely makes for some fun possibilities! but i just dont know if itll be necessary for them to come together or if there will be enough space in the narrative for that. maybe it’s all just a passing mention, but i think thatll be disappointing for a lot of people who have already been very disappointed (see the one sentence thing).

i think it really depends on what marius is like in the show and what daniel needs, to sum up. im not against it because it makes a certain kind of sense in the books and is also a certain kind of fucked up (what if the two people you care about most in the world have spent more time together than they have with you? and i mean then theres also louis and lestat who armand also cares about and also prioritize each other most of the time…anyway we dont need to get too upset over armand rn always time for that later. but also daniel having a positive relationship with marius could be a strain on his relationship with armand which is very interesting). i definitely could do without it, though! fuck marius!