#they've invaded every part of my life

[a-dumb-sarcastic-bisexual]

More random Nimona headcanons

Bal is one of those people who isn’t allergic to anything except one random medication that no one uses 

Ambrosius calls him a lucky bastard every time it’s brought up because he’s allergic to everything 

His allergy list is at least three pages long and he doesn’t remember a single thing on that list 

Whenever they go out to eat Bal has to remind him “No you can’t eat that it has olives” “Not that either love it’s got lemon” and so on 

Most of his allergic reactions are pretty tame so he’ll eat it anyway

And it gives Bal and Nimona so much fucking anxiety 

One time Bal walked in on Nimona chasing Ambrosius around the kitchen yelling “Spit out the carrots Nemesis you don’t even like them that much!!” 

Whenever he eats alone he refers to it as a game of Russian roulette 

Bal refers to it as the reason he has high blood pressure

Because Bal and Ambrosius grew up in the limelight (for very different reasons) there are a million pictures of them through the years 

And they use those videos to bully the hell out of each other 

Bal can quote the video from the beginning of the movie not because it was an important moment in his childhood 

But because Ambrosius will quote it at the most random times throughout the day

Bal will do something small like kill a bug or chase out an animal that Nimona brought in

And he’ll hear Ambrosius mumble “I’m here to slay monsters and protect our kingdom”

He was a little worried Nimona would react badly to this habit but he started joining in 

One time he killed a spider and Ambrosius asks “Are you slaying monsters moonbeam?” Nimona yells from the other room “I’m so proud of him he’s truly protecting our kingdom” 

There are a million photos of baby Ambrosius on the internet 

And Bal made a PowerPoint presentation ranking their cuteness factor out of 10 (100 was the lowest score he got and it was a picture of him with the ugliest bowl cut you’ve ever seen)

And made Ambrosius sit through it 

That was the most loved and mortified he had felt in a long time

Nimona uses low-quality pictures of them as reaction photos 

There have been times when Nimona asks “Can we eat out tonight” and Bal tells her no and she sends him this 

He’ll text back “Is that my fucking wanted poster?!” 

She asked Ambrosius if there was any ice cream left and he said no he expected her to call him and complain he didn’t expect this 

He calls her yelling “When the fuck did that happen?!” 

And she hangs up immediately to let Bal deal with it

[nonbinaryspy]

Meta: Elincia's Trolley Problems

Elincia's arc comes into sharpest relief when you consider both PoR and RD together. From living a sheltered life as a secret princess, to watching her parents get killed as her country is invaded, to eventually rising to the challenge of her unexpected role as queen, she has to deal with important decisions at every turn. Every action she takes is out of love for Crimea's people and a desire to secure them safe and happy lives. But what happens when she has to choose between the life of a loved one and the future of the overall populace? Both PoR and RD test this with narrative beats that form a perfect mirror, ultimately reflecting Elincia's development.

Path of Radiance

Throughout PoR, Elincia has been separated from her usual support network, particularly her retainers. After returning to Crimea, she finally finds them—however, in chapter 24, before she is able to reunite with Geoffrey, he is left behind to fend off Daein troupes so that Elincia can escape. Elincia is naturally horrified.

Bastian: Geoffrey's acting as a decoy. You must continue on this road to the southwest. Lucia: So the enemy's found us, eh? Lucia: Nothing to do about it but change course. I'll lead you to another hiding place. Elincia: Wh-what are you saying, Lucia? We must help Geoffrey! Bastian? Lucia: Luck was not with us, Princess. We have no choice. We'll have to abandon our companions in Castle Delbray. Elincia: No!! We will not!! Geoffrey and the others have survived so much already... I will not abandon them! Lucia: Princess, please understand. If we could do so without danger to you, we would gladly risk our lives to go back. Elincia: We cannot do this! Please, Lucia! We must go to the castle! ...Bastian! You must not do this thing! Bastian: Geoffrey is a knight. In the name of our friend's honor, Princess, you must escape. Elincia: No... No! They've survived this long! They're alive! NO!!!

When Ike gives her the chance to instead save Geoffrey, she affirms that this is what she wants.

Elincia: Yes. I don't want... I don't want anyone else to be sacrificed.

Lucia and Bastian respect her wishes and agree to help Geoffrey, at which point she is able to get her feelings across.

Elincia: Because the two of you think to put me above all else, you say you will sacrifice your lives for me. Yet... Even if I'm able to borrow of Ike's strength and win back Crimea... If the cost of that victory is the lives of the two of you, I shall never smile again. And joy? Never again would that emotion fill my heart...

Elincia is a leader, but she's also a person—one who never asked for this role. Until recently, she has not had to make decisions that would affect the future of a whole country, as opposed to only living within her personal sphere. In fact, the main political decision made re: her life—the decision to keep her birth secret—was made for her. She has already lost her parents and, as far as she knows, her beloved uncle.

Since then, her choices have all been for the sake of Crimea. In reality, she has had little choice in how to go about that goal, considering she has been fleeing for her life while at the whims of Begnion politics. Being able to return to Crimea and reunite with her retainers is the first time she has been running toward, rather than away, from something, and still part of that goal is being held from her reach. Nothing will stop her from working hard for Crimea, but individual losses will still give her permanent grief. So here, she finally takes a stand against the choices other people try to make for her, and insists on protecting her loved ones and regaining some of what she lost.

What happens next depends on the player, but considering her retainers are alive in RD, the duology's canon here is that they all survive this fight. Due to Elincia getting her feelings across, her loved ones are saved, and the campaign continues.

After this experience, the cost of individual lives in war is hammered home, and Elincia decides it's not enough to order others to keep her retainers safe. Regaining her inherited pegasus and sword, she takes to the field despite the mixed feelings of her retainers.

Elincia: Even though I'm dressed like this, I have no experience, and do not expect to fight as well as the rest of you. But…this constant waiting behind and doing nothing…it sets my heart beating with such unease I fear it may burst. Even if I cannot fight, I could use a staff to heal the wounded. If I could save just one soldier, it would mean so much to me.

This quote shows her resolve and compassion, but it also shows that she still lacks experience and confidence, especially when it comes to conflict. Despite being trained in swordplay, she instead emphasizes her ability to heal, and sets a fairly low bar for what her contribution will mean. Although, given that this plot demonstrates the importance of saving an individual life, maybe I shouldn't call it a low bar. Either way, at this point, there is still plenty of room for her to grow and change, and RD will challenge her to due so.

Radiant Dawn

Part two of Radiant Dawn focuses on Ludveck attempting to usurp Elincia's throne by stirring up reactionary attitudes toward her policies, specifically with regards to her alliance with Gallia, to threaten civil war and pressure her into giving up her throne. Because she fears the conflict that could come out of taking direct action against a noble, and because his followers are also citizens of Crimea for whom she feels responsible, she approaches the situation carefully. Ludveck takes advantage of this hesitance to eventually kidnap Lucia.

Once again, one of the Delbray siblings is in peril, and this time, as Crimea's queen, Elincia does not need to convince anyone to save her. Instead, she takes to the field herself. As with PoR, she had not immediately done so—in this case, because of the delicacy the situation called for. But with Lucia's life at risk and Ludveck's forces at Elincia's door, she decides the time for delicacy is past.

Elincia: “Lucia… Lucia, I’m sorry. Somehow, I promise you… I will save you!” ... Elincia: “…Very well. I must prepare as well. I had hoped this day would never come… Amiti, the treasured blade of House Crimea, will awaken from its long slumber.”

Unlike in PoR, rather than focusing on her healing ability, she mentions Amiti. She no longer needs to make disclaimers or doubt the importance of her role commanding the field. The wording of "I had hoped this day would never come" and "awaken from its long slumber" emphasize that she has already been through the horrors of war once, and never wanted to again. She despises violence, but she is resigned to doing what she must.

Despite holding out against Ludveck's forces and throwing him in the dungeon, she is not able to do anything about his trump card. With Lucia as hostage, he tries to use her life as a bargaining chip for his release, as well as the country. After the incident in PoR, where her retainers saw their own lives as disposable, she convinced them to realize how valuable they were to her. So with the Delbray siblings' situations reversed, Geoffrey now asks Elincia to save Lucia.

Geoffrey: “…Your Majesty, you can’t… You have to let me do something about this.” Elincia: “…” Geoffrey: “Lucia would willingly die fighting for her country, I know… But you have to help her, Elincia. If you were in her position, she would surely do the same. Please, just give the word.”

Again, Elincia is at the point where she is taking action herself instead of entreating others. Rather than order him to do anything, Elincia visits Ludveck in what is one of the most defining scenes of her arc. The non-extended version is below as I think it gets the point across quite well, but there are more dialogue beats in the extended version.

Ludveck: “Queen Elincia, you’re so naive. Cold and callous decisions are sometimes required of a nation’s ruler. …I was testing you. We all wanted to know if our queen would have the power to stop a civil war.” Ludveck: “But, no, you were too hesitant and too concerned about harming the people… Now look what has happened. The rule of Crimea cannot be kept in your hands! Please, Your Majesty! You must abdicate and cede the crown to me!” Ludveck: “And considering Lady Lucia’s life is on the line, you haven’t much choice. Now, let’s have you free me from this prison cell, and then we can discuss any further details…” Elincia: “I don’t think so.” Ludveck: “What?! Are you truly willing to sacrifice Lady Lucia?!” Elincia: “…Lord Ludveck, all your dissatisfaction and misgivings about me are well founded. However, do you realize how many lives you’ve simply thrown away?! Strength without compassion does not a ruler make. You care nothing for the people, sir. You cloak your desire to rule with pretty speeches, but it is petty avarice nonetheless!” Ludveck: “…So this is how it shall be? Very well… But Lady Lucia cannot be spared without my order.” Elincia: “Allowing you to plant the seeds of rebellion and play havoc with the lives of my people is a failure for which I must answer. But I will see Crimea through this trial. I will give my people the future they deserve, no matter the cost.”

Ludveck patronizes Elincia for her compassion while pretending he has the citizens' best interests at heart, but Elincia doesn't bow to his demands. She maintains her compassion along with her resolve. However, no matter how caring someone is, the fact of the matter is that decisions that help even a great deal of people still come with consequences. Elincia realizes this, and is prepared to make that sacrifice while taking responsibility—even though, as she said in PoR, she "shall never smile again."

In the beginning of PoR, Elincia lost almost everything in one fell swoop. When she was finally reunited with her retainers, the thought of sacrificing even one of them was unbearable, even if it could potentially have derailed her goal to retake her country from an invading tyrant. Now, though, she is in a position of greater power, and she is fully aware of the responsibility that comes with it. Compared to PoR, where she was so often at the mercy of others, the only thing tying her hands now is the threat to Lucia. Of course, Lucia is immensely important to her, but after spending three years working to rebuild Crimea, nothing can convince her to let it again fall to ruin under another power-hungry leader.

Thankfully, Lucia's life and Elincia's smiles are saved, thanks to Bastian secretly calling in the Greil Mercenaries. Despite her resolve, Elincia's conflicting priorities are still apparent, as in the extended version (translation on Serenes Forest provided below) she expresses wonder at her decision. As for her retainers, though their feelings on how she should handle such situations have shifted over time, they don't begrudge her decision.

Elincia: “…When Lucia was captured… It was as if I lost my other half. Even now, seeing her by my side, I feel so strange… Wondering how, at that time, I could make the decision to abandon her…” Lucia: “Lady Elincia…” Elincia: “Still… If the same scenario occurred… I believe I would make the same decision. Lucia’s life is important, but it’s not on the same scale as protecting the country. As the Queen of Crimea, I must accomplish my duty to the country foremost.” Lucia: “Of course. Seeing Lady Elincia being able to make this decision, it truly makes me happy. As if I would hate you.” Geoffrey: “My thoughts exactly.” Elincia: “Lucia, Geoffrey… I value your lives more than even my own. But it’s my duty to protect this country, even if that means losing you. I’ve learned a lot from all of this. I hope to keep them out of harm’s way, and I’ll never make the same mistakes again.”

By the end of this section, the bulk of Elincia's arc is complete. She has decided what matters to her and what she will do as queen when put into high-pressure situations. She resolves the situation by deciding to be openly harsh in punishing Ludveck's followers despite the fact that it will gain ire toward her, as refusing to do so before gave him the opening he needed. She has decided to be uncompromising in the face of reactionary politics. Not everyone in Crimea will agree with her decisions, but those closest to her will never waver in their loyalty, to the extent that they are both willing to live and die for her. It's no wonder that, as her epilogue says, "Her reign was remembered as a golden age."

Conclusion

Because I touched on the topic of Elincia's agency and how she maneuvers within the limits of it, I want to give a brief shout-out to her actions in part three. She is Gallia's ally and does not want any more bloodshed in her lands. However, due to Begnion exercising its imperial power, she cannot fully stop its army from entering her lands in pursuit of the laguz alliance. The action she ultimately takes, dropping her weapon in between the opposing armies and essentially daring them to murder a queen of a country with whom they're both allied, all without betraying her own nonviolent ideals, is an unparalleled power move.

Getting back to Elincia's trolley problems, what I find interesting is that though Elincia's decisions are different in PoR and RD, neither game condemns her for her choices. She cares for both the mass of strangers that comprise her kingdom and the loved ones who she's spent her life beside. Her situation in each game is different, so she handles each situation differently in ways that make sense given her roles, pressures, and motivations.

FE in general, and Tellius in particular, asks the characters and players to care about the fates of individual lives as well as whole worlds. Both PoR and RD present the question of what someone would or should do when these personal and political goals conflict, without giving one black-and-white answer. Elincia's arc is just one impactful example of this.

As for me, I'm not gonna lie—though Elincia doesn't have the option to reset the game whenever someone dies, I probably always will.

[thatlittleegyptologist]

Are we still clowning on the anons trying to tell you how awful living in Europe is? Because I (a USian) saw them spouting nonsense and was like 'Those who live in glass houses should not throw stones'. Several communities there do not have access to safe drinking water at all. Texas's insistence on building their own electric grid incompatible with the rest of the country's meant that about 246 died in the 2021 winter storm. I'm trying to move to the land of bones because the US? YIKES

The US is not without its problems infrastructure wise, yes. I don't think any country is in all honesty.

Though, I think I should address how anon seemed to be getting wires crossed about the situation in Europe:

Most homes here are maybe 100 years old at most, some 150 ish, but most only 40-70 years (something something rebuilding after two world wars). Of course, you get ones built earlier that people still live in. I've known several people in my life who lived in 16th century built homes with thatched roofs. My own home is about 60 years old.

'The buildings are crumbling' yeah, they're old...so they will. But they're not falling down so there's no issue. We make repairs!

Despite their age they do have all the mod cons! Yes, including the 16th century farm houses! You see with continuous settlement people repair and renovate the existing homes, so over the years things like electricity/central heating/plumbing etc have been added.

That said, depending on when stuff like electricity and plumbing was installed it can fail. Anon said that anecdotally a socket had blown. This could be due down to age. However, it can also be down to an american adapter being the wrong voltage for the european plug socket. That tends to make them short out. I've had two american friends at uni who had plug sockets short out on them when arriving in the UK because they used the wrong voltage adapters. Nothing to do with the wiring. Mostly to do with no checking voltage requirements. I've had to do the same when holidaying on the continent. If I take the wrong one I'm gonna damage something.

While central heating and air con are in abundance in Europe, not everyone needs air con. In Northern Europe, before climate change, we experience cold winters but mild summers so our homes needed good central heating and thick walls to keep the heat in. Which they have! However, now climate change is upon us...imagine living in a house where the walls are thick and trap heat but it's 40c outside and you don't have air con still because it's still too expensive a thing to install for 3 weeks use a year at best. That's why anon has seen Europeans complaining about being too hot. The temperatures are record breaking high, and because it's not normal for it to be like that we don't have air con. Southern Europe, where it's much warmer, is where homes more regularly have air con. Pretty much every commercial building, regardless of location or age, has some sort of air conditioning and central heating system.

The 'europeans don't have central heating' probably comes from the posts about how most of us are going to freeze to death this winter due to fuel prices/shortages. We have central heating, we just can't afford to put it on. Thanks to Pusheen (fameux dictateur Russe) invading Ukraine, gas prices in Europe have gone through the roof. In the winter I used to pay £75 for gas and electric per month. Now, I pay £120 for gas alone. I live alone. My consumption is less (I halved the time I have the heating on to save money so it's -3c and I only have the heating on 2 hours a day). Many more people are in a worse off state than me. They can't afford to heat their homes at all. Add in inflation, which has pushed food prices sky high, recession, and stagnant wages, and people are dying from not being able to put the heating on. They've got it anon, but they can't afford to use it and also eat.

Moving to the 'move somewhere without bones' part of it all. Europeans are fine digging up bones and mosaics. Happens all the time, I've no idea why anon thinks we'd need to move or why we'd be mad about it. It's our history! Part of continuously living in an area for centuries means that inevitably when you dig down for foundations you're gonna find bones. That's where the Archaeologists come in! Laws here dictate that an archaeological survey must be conducted on any build site, so that if there is something there it can be properly recorded! This is so we don't end up with what we currently have where it's like 'nope no idea what's down there' and the surprise is a WWII bomb or a roman cemetery, or even a plague pit.

Actually that last one is one I've experienced. When I was looking into archaeology as a degree I went to a dig site for a new shopping centre where they'd discovered victorian ruins, a medieval abbey destroyed by Henry VIII, and a plague pit all on the same site. An absolutely wild time. These guys had to be moved or secured before the actual building work could commence. You can still go down and see the plague pit if you know the right people because the building was built in a way that preserved it.

Anyway, the digging of graves is where everyone seems to get funny with regards to archaeology. They'll accuse archeologists of grave robbing or disturbing the dead and that's so far from the truth it's unreal.

Firstly, there's so much paperwork involved when remains are found. So much. 90% of the time archaeologists don't even deal with human remains because we're digging up buildings instead. I don't know why people seem to think 99% of our work is with the dead. It's not. After finding remains, then we have to decide what is safe for them. If we can leave them in situ we will. You excavate, analyse, record the find, and then cover them back up. People seem to think we're getting to the grave site and then removing everything to keep in a box. That's only done if the remains are in danger from the construction or agriculture that's being performed there. It's a choice between saving a person's remains, or letting them get destroyed by construction work. Which do you think is more respectful in that scenario?

We don't make that decision lightly either. So many elements are factored into the decision, including the safety of the site (will someone come along and steal for the antiquities black market? See: Egypt and the reasons mummies are moved to storage when found.) and how best to keep this person's dignity. We don't want to smash through remains with bulldozers and concrete. Where we can, like that famous McDonald's in Italy with the body in the floor, we keep them in situ so they do remain in their graves. In the UK, recently, there was a huge mosaic uncovered in a field by a farmer. Archaeologists excavated it, recorded it, took a load of photos, didn't disclose the precise location, covered it back up, and then told everyone 6 months after it has been discovered just to preserve the site.

Most archaeological finds were discovered months before the public even knew about them in order to preserve the site and not get illegal traffickers trying to make money off things (again, the reason mummies in Egypt are moved to museums. it's for their safety not because no one wants them to be in their graves). We want these people and artefacts to rest in peace as much as you do. Believe it or not Archaeologists do care about the people and places they are tasked with uncovering and protecting. Sometimes you've got to move those bones because if you don't someone who doesn't care for anything but making a quick profit will dig that site and sell what they find.

Often it's a race between archaeologists discovering sites and therefore affording them security from getting disturbed, and traffickers digging in locations they know something might be and selling what they find to some rich bastard where it'll never see the light of day.

TL;DR: Europe isn't living in the Middle Ages, we're suffering from climate change and soaring fuel/food prices, and Archaeologists perform a vital job that isn't about grave robbing but about preserving and protecting the past from traffickers and giving those dead we do come across a voice in the present.

[autistichalsin]

I'm really fucking tired.

All I wanted was a space to obsess over a fictional man, who brought me a ton of healing, in peace.

This group has made it their mission to chase not only me away, but anyone associated with me. They called me a rape fetishizer for writing CNC fic. They called me a pedophile for making an omega Halsin headcanon. They called me a self-hating lesbian/lesbophobic for saying it's TERFy to demonize queer male sexuality. They mocked my abuse by my mom, and when called on it, laughed that I deserved it for saying how Mint's actions remind me of her sometimes. They accused me of retraumatizing myself because of the fic I wrote, when THEY were the ones who retraumatized me by causing me to have a flashback to my mom abusing me. They accused me of absolutely vile things, and today they questioned if I even was "really" abused because of the fic I wrote. They repeatedly mocked my special interests and then got offended and played victim when I said this was ableist. They've sent suicide bait to me and my friends.

They've harassed others: they harassed a bi SH fan for asking them to stop saying it was icky to ship her with men until she left the fandom, they harassed someone who made a mod to turn Scratch into Astarion so they could see the animations (even calling this person as bad as Cazador), they harassed someone for making a headcanon about Astarion dancing with Tav, they harassed a lesbian who herself headcanons Karlach as a lesbian and doesn't like Karlach/Dammon but explained why others do, they harassed my friend Mish for saying she was okay with me writing CNC, they sent suicide bait to another friend of mine and said she deserved to get raped so she would sympathize with Mint, causing her to have a mental breakdown and have to go to the hospital for 24 hours, and every time someone pushes back against them, this group weaponizes their identity by saying that person is bigoted against their identity- while ignoring (at best) the marginalized identities that person has, or at worst, furthering oppression against them (I.E. their repeated ableist comments, including one of them snarling at another user about "enjoying your grippy sock vacation")

And despite all these vile things this group of people have done, people are still believing them and sending more harassment to myself and my friends in their defense.

I'm fucking tired.

I'm tired of defending myself. I'm tired of losing people I considered friends to their lies. I'm tired of having my inbox invaded by these vile people.

They are wearing at my mental health and this already made me relapse on one of my addictive behaviors and I am fighting really hard not to do the other one. I'm tired. I loved this fandom and I loved contributing my ideas. I get so many messages from people saying I made them feel seen or made them connect to Halsin's character, and getting a message from a survivor that my posts gave them the words they were lacking for what happened to them and they were able to work through it in counseling was honestly one of the best things to ever happen to me. I really don't want to lose that. Ever. But I can't keep doing this.

I'm not bigoted to my own identity. I don't hurt people. I don't fetishize rape. I'm tired of being a broken record and not being believed because that group is so good at fragilizing themselves. I can't do it anymore.

I just wanted to share my thoughts about a fictional bear man because it made me happy and so many parts of him gave me courage. I wanted to give up cynicism like he did. I wanted to find his strength to take care of people.

But I am honestly very close to regretting ever joining this fandom. I have gained so much from it, it helped my mental health immensely, but this shit has put me in an even WORSE place mentally than i was before I joined.

I don't know what to do. I'm just tired of the way, no matter how much I epitomize "living your best life" I get treatment from these people that I honestly wouldn't wish on my worst enemy.

I have a lot of painful feelings right now and I don't know what to do anymore. It just hurts and I think everyone would be better off if I'd never made this blog to begin with.

[noir-fem]

PREFACE: this is just MY OPINION on some takes I've seen. This is meant to call out some team black fans who take things way too far and bully people, but I will not condone any kind of bullying or harassment in the comments. We can disagree, we can discuss our disagreements, but what we're not gonna do is bully or threaten people, okay?

Okay.

That being said, this is a friendly reminder that the Targaryens invaded a land that WAS NOT THEIRS then proceeded to take the things that they believed they had a divine right to through force and violence (aka their dragons, which are a metaphor for the weapons of mass destruction used in real wars). This is literally a metaphor for colonizers. GRRM wrote the dance of dragons as an anti-war commentary and made it clear that the Targaryens thinking that they're a divine race who are entitled to do whatever they want at the expense of the common man is a HORRIBLE WAY OF THINKING and this has gone completely over some of yall's heads.

Look, you can like whatever characters you wanna like for whatever reason! Nobody in HOTD is truly a good person, so there's no point in real people fighting with each other over it. But I'm tired of watching team black fans who justify their choice by saying this very thing proceed to bully and harass not only team green fans, but even the team green ACTORS because they don't like what the CHARACTERS did. Like, what happened to all of them being bad people?? And why call REAL people names, harass them, and even threaten them just because of what these FICTIONAL CHARACTERS did????

If it truly doesn't matter who you support because "they're all bad people", then why are you harassing REAL PEOPLE just because they don't like the same war criminals you do? "Both sides do bad things", so what moral high ground do you have over team green fans? One person on here said that some of y'all act like you're actually part of House Targaryen and it's true! If the Targaryens were real people who actually did these things, y'all defending them so staunchly would be worrying to say the least!

I love Aemond as a character, and I can understand his motivation for killing Luke, but I'll never defend him killing Luke because at the end of the day, children getting killed is unexcusable NO MATTER WHAT. I don't want to watch anything horrible happen to Rhaenyra's children any more than I want to watch Blood and Cheese happen to Helaena and her children. I love team green because I think they're interesting characters that I see a lot of myself in and I think that their actions make sense for the time period and circumstances they live in. However, I also look at their actions through a modern lens and would never condone some of the things they've done in real life.

Posting this bc I'm tired of seeing team green fans get called hypocrites while the people who claim to be feminists/progressives worship characters who represent the TOTAL OPPOSITE of feminism without a second thought. I'm tired of seeing certain fans make shitty takes saying that Alicent doing bad things "wouldn't be a problem if she would just own up to it!!", when team black fans go out of their way to justify Blood and Cheese and every other bad thing that their favs do.

Once again, keep the comments civil! if you start bullying or threatening people you're getting blocked and reported :)

[cacklefrendly]

At this point i want to hear all of your gin and vodka hc cause we need more of them also cause youre art is AMAZING

OH ANON I WILL TAKE ANY EXCUSE TO PREACH THE GOOD WORD OF THE VESPER COCKTAIL

but first listen hey just. jsut listen to me.

have you considered the inherent vulnerability of standing next to someone who could happily kill you in a hundred different ways and trusting that they won't. of always being on guard for a knife in your back but knowing that there is exactly One Person who stands behind you who'd never raise that blade.

because my friends. that is Gin and Vodka.

ok these is in no particular order buuut here are some HCs that i work from as a baseline for rotating them both in my head:

Both of them are in their early 40s, and joined the Black Organization at about the same time. Gin joined from the criminal side of things, while Vodka joined as a legit office worker. They started working together a few years in.

They are SO GOOD at non-verbal communication. They've completely changed mission plans on-the-spot multiple times, all with a couple of glances and nods.

Vodka fell for Gin YEARS before the events of canon but there is no world in which he makes the first move. Initially his silence was because "i would rather not risk pissing off my Murder-Boss who would maybe react by Murdering Me" but he's stayed silent because. Well. He's honestly happy with their relationship as-is. He can see how much Gin trusts him, values that immensely, and reciprocates it. They live together, for god's sake. It's not a romantic thing, sure, and sometimes Vodka wishes it was, but he cherishes what they have more than anything. ...meanwhile Gin is demi-romantic and very autistic and straight-up does not realize that he's in love with Vodka. he'll figure it out. eventually.

If you want to compare them to dogs (and i very much DO), then Gin is a Borzoi (sighthound) and Vodka is a Clumber Spaniel (flushing dog). Vodka scares targets into running and Gin chases them down.

Vodka runs hot and Gin runs cold. They achieve thermal equilibrium when they cuddle!! But it usually means the car's temperature is set way too hot for Vodka.

Gin is well aware that he's a vicious person in every aspect of his life, but he's waaaay past the point where he tries to hide it. Vodka likes his viciousness. Gin likes that Vodka likes his viciousness. They're both freaks and should be together to keep them from mauling the public.

I like to think that their canon height difference is an artifact of the show being Detective Conan — it's part of Conan's view of the world. Gin’s the one who attacked him as Shinichi, the one who keeps coming the closest to finding Conan out, the one who's more cruel and ruthless. Vodka ticks all those boxes too, yeah, but Gin is the one who Conan's actually scared of. So, from Conan's perspective, we see Gin as super frigging tall. He looms over everything, he's untouchable — while Vodka’s just Some Guy who looks pathetic and kinda meek when standing next to Gin. In reality — AKA, according to how i draw them — Gin and Vodka are the same height. Taller than Vodka’s canon height, but shorter than Gin’s. (Technically Gin is, like, an inch or two shorter, but it's such an insignificant difference that their hats and shoes make them the same.)

An outside observer would think that Gin takes everything Vodka offers and gives nothing in return, but that's not true. It's just that he shows affection like a large cat: with mauled corpses and by invading Vodka's personal space. He also does stuff like 'lets Vodka drive his very expensive and hard-to-get car' and 'respects Vodka's take on situations' and 'keeps falling asleep on Vodka' and—

They spar. Sometimes, those spars are all-out. During those spars, Gin tends to bite. A lot! There's blood. Vodka is okay with being his chew-toy. A little too okay with it. You could go so far as to say he's eager. In Gin's defense, if you're fighting for your life you have got to take any opening you can. There is no defense for Vodka.

Theoretically, if Kaitou KID were to disguise as Gin, then Vodka "My Main Love Language Is Learning Other's Mannerisms" BlackOrg would clock him in minutes. He wouldn't say anything immediately, but he spends too much time working with Gin to fall for that shit. If Kaitou KID were to disguise as Vodka, then Gin "My Main Love Language Is Letting My Guard Down" BlackOrg wouldn't realize something was up unless KID stood directly next to him — at which point Gin would switch to his second Love Language, Murder.

The first song Vodka ever sang to Gin was Hallelujah. Someday, it will be the last song he ever sings to Gin.

The first time they met was technically way back when Vodka was working for one of the B.Org's fronts and not in on the illegal stuff yet. His immediate superior, Syrah, was killed by Gin — who was going by a different codename at the time, Kina Lillet. Vodka was bringing paperwork to Syrah's office but heard the tail end of some yelling and the sounds of a struggle. When Kina walked out looking Suspiciously Casual wearing all black and generally looking Scary As Shit he decided that he was not getting payed enough to die for that company. Kina asked "how much did you hear" and Vodka replied "i mind my damn business, sir, so frankly i didn't hear shit" and went on his way to figure out an alibi. (They met formally a couple years later, as Gin and Vodka. Gin recognized Vodka but Vodka didn't recognize Gin.)

[chloecherrysip]

Hey.....remember when I said I wasn't gonna go see the Mario movie in theaters again? WHAT IF, HYPOTHETICALLY, THAT WAS A FLATOUT LIE AND I WENT AGAIN EARLIER TODAY???

AND what if I had more thoughts to share somehow, even though I could have sworn I was tapped out and would never do another longform post like this?? Wouldn't that be so very silly of me????

WELL, FUNNY THING

LOOK, I just really wanted to get out of the house and there was a showing in 3D five minutes away from me and I hadn't seen it in 3D! I have seen maybe ONE movie in 3D in my whole life and it was several years ago so I'm not too used to what that's like - and honestly, the effect is pretty cool! Maybe I'm easy to please but I liked the way the rain/ocean spray/ice in the beginning/etc actually seemed like it was in the air around me! (Also, I got a legitimate jolt when the Dry Bones popped out of the ground, I just didn't expect it to seem so CLOSE lololol)

Also, it was pretty delightful that we are several weeks into this movie's release and there was still someone dressed up fully as Mario in the theatre who walked by me. I love people! :D

I am at the point where just NINTENDO'S OPENING LOGO ANIMATION makes me emotional, with Mario and Luigi together and Luigi hopping playfully on Mario's head before running off with Mario jumping after him. They're just the LITTLE RETRO SPRITES and still!!! Brothers!!!!!!!!

During this viewing, I got really into thinking about the lore of the movie!universe specifically and the history of Bowser and his and Peach's conflict. My main question: what is UP with that castle in the Dark Lands? From the brief glimpse we get of the inside, it looks pretty abandoned with stuff littered all over the ground, not like Bowser just left it to go on his crusade. And yet, everyone talks about the Dark Lands as though that is where Bowser currently is and it's also where he lives when he's NOT in a floating airship. Maybe he abandoned that smaller castle years ago and the airship is actually his new and improved castle and it was a part of the Dark Lands before Kamek/magic in general just lifted it into the air at some point? But then why are there Shy Guys actively living in and/or patrolling the old castle still??? HMM

Also, Bowser says he had to spend YEARS searching for the super star! That's a lot of time!!! Have the penguins hidden it away from everyone all this time just to keep it safe? Has Peach known about it all along/done anything to help protect it herself? Is there only one star in existence? Does it regenerate after being used and if so, how long does that take??? I like thinking about all these little details, haha.

ALSO x 2, I'm just interested in Bowser and Peach's interactions before the movie in general. Bowser mentions that they've been "sworn enemies" for quite some time and the way he says "Princess Peach! Brave as ever!" just feels like something you say to someone you've spoken with before/have a little familiarity with that ISN'T just creepy spying/pining from afar, lol. Has Bowser tried to invade in the past? I almost wonder if, in the beginning, Peach was her charitable self who tried very hard to reason with him/strike up a peace treaty but it's just always gone wrong or she's VERY MUCH MISREAD all attempts at flirting on Bowser's part or she has just seen too much evidence of him being cruel/willing to kill to get what he wants in the process and that's why she's like "nah fam we're gonna annihilate this monster and leave not a trace behind, i'm DONE with all that peace stuff" now. She is NOT HAVING IT any longer and honestly? I respect that. Bowser is the worst.

(Slightly related: someone remind me that once I'm done with my fic, I need to go into more detail about another alternative movie scenario I've been thinking about where Mario is able to get rid of the Bomber Bill without the Brooklyn stuff ever happening and a furious Bowser grabs both Peach and Luigi (because every time I'm reminded that they never pay off Bowser's threat to use Luigi to hurt Mario, I become a little more insane) and flees in a smaller airship back to the Dark Lands with Mario & company in hot pursuit, and it's basically a more traditional Mario game finale but maybe there's BOWSER BACKSTORY regarding the Dark Lands castle and also Peach & Luigi being kidnapped together lets them bond and eventually become Breakout Buddies and look, it would be a fun time and I want to flesh it out more, OK)

This movie has GOT to come out on digital soon because I NEED to gif so many things (and I don't want to use camrips!!!) and one of those things is every instance of Mario awkwardly waving hello to strangers. HE DOES IT LIKE 5-6 TIMES, HE DOESN'T KNOW WHAT ELSE TO DO. IT'S SO CUTE

Also, I love that Mario calls Cranky Kong "sir" when agreeing to the DK fight. THE MOST POLITE MAN IN THE WORLDDDD

I adore how genuinely touched Mario seems by Peach saying that him not knowing when to quit is a great thing. His little, gentle "thanks" in return makes my heart SOFT. Just makes me think about the vibe of him being the "impulsive" son, the "troublemaker" son in the family and how people like his dad have maybe been tough on him about that quality, and for Peach to just be so excited and look so HAPPY at the concept is so surprising to him -maybe she's the first person outside of Luigi to act like that!

me to me: you have seen this SO many times, do NOT tear up again when Mario sees the commercial on the cracked TV!!!

also me to me: CAN'T HEAR YOU, ALREADY TEARING UP

Also forever emotional about the fact that Mario and Luigi have absolutely NO context for what the star is or what it can do when they decide to grab it together - Peach told Mario to go for it, and that's ALL the information available. But the manhole cover is melting and Bowser's flames are literal seconds away from engulfing them. And even so, they're not afraid, because they're together again and whatever happens next, they'll face hand in hand, side by side, and it's that trust, that unbreakable bond that truly makes them invincible at the end of the day, and DON'T MIND ME, I'LL JUST SOFTLY WEEP OVER HERE

LUIGI WIPING A HAPPY TEAR AWAY AS HE AND MARIO HOLD ONTO EACH OTHER AT THE VERY END ;_______; HE MUST FEEL SO RELIEVED ;_______; PROTECT HIM ALWAYS

I made myself laugh as I was leaving the theater by thinking about the person that had to write that newspaper article at the end about what happened. What must that article read like???? How would you ever begin to be able to describe the events that took place here without sounding like an insane person???? Are the people who didn't see it in person reading this like "uhhhh is this April Fool's Day???" I WOULD HAVE THAT REACTION. I DON'T ENVY THAT PERSON'S POSITION lolol

[remcycl333]

https://remcycl333.tumblr.com/post/695306258871451648/plus-the-reason-so-many-people-after-void-success

Okay sorry in advance for how long this is or if I went too far but this is ridiculous.

People like this piss me off (the post with the person who said they don't believe anyone's void success stories) even though they themselves want to go into the void😂 these are the same people who probably won't ever get what they want because they're so close minded, the ONLY reason someone wouldn't get scared of living that dream life after finally having it in the 3D is because oh yea the whole point of persisting in you already having your desire also comes along with the feeling of normalcy with that desire, so of fucking course someone won't be scared when they enter the void and wake up with a new gender or new this or that, BECAUSE THEY PREPARED THEMSELVES FOR IT(literally going into the void or affirming to go into the void itself is preparing you for everything you desire to come to fruition physically), and the same with affirming/persisting and waking up with everything you desire, they knew they have their desire and literally for MOST success stories I've heard, they don't get scared because they're in their dream life why tf would they be scared? They're in their dream life!! Most of them cry, get excited, overwhelmed and it's literally in MOST STORIES.

Imagine throwing ignorant bullshit around just because "tHeRes nO wAy MiLiOns of pEoPle aRE tElLinG tHe tRutH" because you think they're not fucking scared enough. Also the part where they all that shit about how people should react a certain way, another bullshit thing, I'm sorry but it doesn't take a lot for someone to realize there are millions of people in this entire world and not every single damn person is gonna have the reaction you expect from them. People don't even need the void to wake up with everything they've desired, they affirm and persist and the 3D conforms to their true reality(the one they desire) and many people have woken up with that as well. The same kind of person they are is like those anons who say "where's your proof of you manifesting that? May I ask you to invade your privacy so that you can prove something to me that I can just prove to myself by doing exactly what you have always been saying to do?" (Can you see the sarcasm I hope so).

Anyway thank you for coming to this ted talk I just got so pissed after reading so much ignorance in one post, it had enough ignorance for 20 posts honestly.

no like literally couldn't have said it better myself!!! why would you be scared if you literally purposefully entered the void and then affirmed KNOWING YOU WOULD WAKE UP SOMEWHERE NEW?? like huh??? and like you said, you don't even have to go to the void to manifest that! you could wake up somewhere new without affirming!!

it is just so absurd to me to make a law of assumption blog and use it to shit on the law of assumption and other people who have successfully manifested? and they always say "well im allowed to share my opinions!" literally what do you gain from calling people liars and sending young people who rely on manifesting to get them out of harmful situations into a panic? all because you haven't been able to get into the void yourself?? like why dedicate your time to running a manifestation blog when you clearly don't even believe in manifestation?

[purposefully-lost]

From a transcript of Drew Reimes' podcast By the Day, interviewing Alexander Prescott:

D: So, after all of that, I have one more question for you. Why now?

A: Why now?

D: The book. It's been 20 years, almost to the day, since Jonathan died. You could've told the truth 20 years ago, or-

A: I would've been arrested 20 years ago.

D: Or you could've carried it to the grave. Gone down in history as the man who killed Jack Rabbit. You were an inspiration for a long time, you know. The victim who killed his killer.

A: I wasn't the first. Or the last.

D: Certainly not, but one of the most notorious. So why tell this story right now, when it would ruin your reputation and drag you back into the spotlight? That's a big question on everyone's minds, I think.

There's a long pause, broken only by Alex clearing his throat.

A: I don't think you're gonna like the answer.

D: I haven't liked any of your answers.

Alex laughs abruptly at that.

A: I guess.. I could lie to you, and say that I had good intentions in telling this story now. I could tell you that I- I wanted to humanize him because no good can come from forgetting that bad people are still human, right? Is that what you'd want to hear?

D: Ideally, but that's not what you're going to say.

A: No, it isn't.

He pauses again.

A: I wrote that book because... I don't know. I think in some way I just wrote it for him, and only him. ..You have to understand, Jack died when he was 31 years old. That's young, but that's also three decades. Three decades of his life, and I don't know that anyone ever loved him before I did.

D: There might've been someone.

A: There wasn't. He would've told me about them. And yet for the one year that I knew him.. I didn't tell him. I sure as hell don't think I showed him. So that's what the book is.

D: A love letter?

A: As much it can be.

D: That still doesn't answer the question. Why wait so long to write it?

A: For 20 years, the world's most exploitative journalists and documentarians and true crime TV shows have pulled apart Jack's life. They've invaded all of it, they've ripped up his cabin, they've broken into his childhood home and exposed every part of the records on his crime. And yet they still didn't have the facts right. Someone told me once, just a few years ago, that they'd recently learned of an obscure detail about the case. A dead bunny had been at the original crime scene, they said, right there with all the Bakers. Is it any wonder, then? Jack started like they all do, he tortured animals. And everyone pats themselves on the back for figuring it out, for digging into the psyche of Jonathan Stone. It's such bullshit.

A: Jack was a good kid. I firmly believe that. Even as an adult, with everything in his head all fucked up, he loved animals. He loved music. He was out there all alone for half of his life, with all his missing pieces, and he built a home he loved. He took care of it, he kept himself clean. There was a good man in there somewhere.

D: Some would think that's an awful thing to say.

A: Is it? Jack wasn't an inherently bad man. What happened, what he did, didn't start with him. I was tired of the narrative getting twisted and I was tired of being seen as some kind of strong, relentless survivor because I'd killed the man I loved. I shot Jack as a mercy. It's the biggest regret of my life. I was ready for someone, anyone else, to see the person I knew. I can't give Jack the love he'd needed for his whole life. But I can clear up the facts, at least. I owe him so much more than that.

Another long pause.

D: Well, I think that's all I've got time for. Thank you for coming on the show, Alex. It's been a very interesting discussion. Honestly, I might be interested in having you back sometime.

A: Maybe. Thanks for having me.

[dregbourne]

headcanon : comparing sylas to irelia.

i think sylas' voice lines in game really remind me of my first impression of irelia, the raw anger of it all. they're both rightfully angry at the people who have wronged them, and they both use violence in order to get their way. sylas' time spent working for the mageseekers and then in prison has absolutely irrevocably changed him. considering his life, his radicalized way of thinking is honestly understandable.

his hatred for the ruling class for failing not only him but all other mages in demacia, for the mageseekers who imprison and torture innocent men and women... not to mention the children; it's so startlingly similar to how irelia hates every noxian for what they've done to her personally as well as her homeland. when facing a noxian in battle, the calm and composed leader is completely replaced by a wrathful woman who's bringing down the wrath of the gods upon her enemies. to her, in every noxian she sees an invader, a savage and war-hungry soldier who'd happily kill children and burn down every ionian household to fuel their bloodlust.

beyond their anger, there's also how both of them are hated by their own countrymen. sylas on a much larger scale of course, but irelia was once a part of the navori brotherhood; who chose to turn her back on them after they became millitant towards fellow countrymen who didn't believe in their vision for ionia — he's feared and hated by demacians ( rightfully so for the destruction he did cause ) but sylas is far too grown and tired to really even care about that.

anyways, this has been a pretty rambly post but please don't dismiss sylas as just an angry and evil guy because as much as he is morally grey. i don't intend to compromise on that in my writing, and i'd like to explore his character and all the different aspects of it. he is angry because of the horrors he's seen and at the unfair system that has crushed so many mages like himself underfoot. he's loud and violent because if he isn't... nothing will change. a systemic issue like the one that faces mages within demacia, it won't go away because of a few ' nice mages ' becoming trusted, because he's seen what happens to them first hand. also, i'll put some voice line comparison under the cut because this post is getting long enough.

bold : sylas italics : irelia

" see the remnants of my bondage, and know you can be free! " " cast off your shackles! "

" swine and sheep. that's all they are. " " i've never killed a person… just a lot of noxians. "

" conflict brings truth... eventually. " " peace must sometimes be bought with blood. "

" they can't hang us all! " " they didn't kill us all. "

" do not allow them peace! " " give them no foothold! "

" whatever they bring, i'll match it. " " careful — i hit back. "

" rise up, brothers and sisters! " " keep your form! move as one! "

" no more kings! no more queens! no more mageseekers! it all ends now! " " take out their necks! the heads will follow. "

[hekateinhell]

Hello! I left a comment on OH saying I have headcanons in the shower about it (seriously this fic hants me) and you asked me to share so here is one of the many that invade my mind. I hope it's okay. In my head they grow old together (I'm an optimist) and they're wrinkly and grey but still so very besotted. They look at each other with love and desire which creeps and awe in equal mesure the young one in their life. 1/2

Family and friends learns quickly that you can't visit unannounced because grandpa's are still fucking in the middle of the day (night is for sleeping they're old and tired). A hip replacement won't stop them THEY'RE IN LOVE. Once again thank you for this wonderful story 2/2

Hi! ❤️ Yay, of course it's okay - I'm always so happy to hear people's thoughts on my fics!! Words of my words, headcanons of my headcanons 🥹 (lmao omg jk okay I'll stop)

I love this so much! They're old and grey and still obsessed with each other! 😭 Part of what's especially fun for me with this AU is that I get to explore them both getting older — even though OH!Daniel is currently younger than QotD!Daniel, RIP.

I eluded to that a bit in the snippet I shared, but I just think it's so beautiful to imagine loving someone long enough that you can chart the passage of time on their face and body and fucking love it because you've been there the whole time! It's your shared story!

And also just because we never see Armand as a fully grown and developed adult, I like to think about what he'd be like in his 20s, 30s, 40s, so on. And what would his long-lasting relationships look like as they all evolve and go through life together at the same pace? 🥹

I just want them to buy groceries, pay bills, make soups and casseroles, and cuddle on the couch in between getting up to the kinkiest shit because they're GGG (good, giving, and game!) 🤧

Picture them helping each other around the house: Armand helping Daniel in and out of the shower after that hip replacement; Daniel organizing Armand's pill box for him every Sunday because after fifty years together he's picked up on some of his more obsessive tendencies; Armand getting frustrated when not even Daniel can explain the latest tech to him; all the evidence of the life they've lived together in their photo albums and on the walls and in the revolving door of people coming and going (and catching an eyeful of Armand half under the afghan over Daniel's lap in front of the 5 o'clock news... it's what they get for not knocking!).

[emcant]

I think I figured out what I was trying to talk about last night:

I'm really, really nervous about being deliberately misinterpreted. (...she said, to the internet. I'm aware of the irony, but I feel pretty safe in this corner of it.) That's my folks to a t, and once they've made up their minds, there's no discussion of what I actually meant. The worst kind of echo chamber: nuance is not permitted, and only one opinion is allowed. Fear of that gets my goat every time, and always has.

At its mildest, C-PTSD still means turning over the scary time from 20 years ago; part of you got stuck there, after all. I don't know why this particular one stood out, as this was how all of my creative work went:

When the US invaded Iraq, I drew probably the best piece I've ever done: as realistic a rose as a middle schooler could manage, in the American flag colors, with a huge black scissors cutting it from the stem. I turned it in for some assignment and got a good grade so I put it on my wall. I can't emphasize enough how good this thing looked - I really surprised myself.

Anyway, I was also in therapy for what we thought was depression at the time, and there was a specific day on which we'd discuss what my mom could change to help me. I didn't have time to see it, but at some point, she pulled my rose off my wall and used it to derail the meeting. Obviously nothing was working; why did I make a poster about SH and keep it in my room? It's not even remotely about SH, I tried to protest, but she made it clear she'd shut down.

Even now, I'm kind of nervous about how the therapist interpreted that. It's classic My POS Mom, and as an adult I can see exactly what she was doing: power plays. But like. Was there SH inherent in the drawing if I didn't mean to put it there?

And does it matter?

I live a pretty open life now, but there's a lot right under my surface. I think I ultimately do want people prodding at it; I'd do the same anyway. I don't have shame about who I am anymore (and never should have), and haven't considered myself a creator since coming around on that. This feels familiar, but it really is all brand new.

[hxvemxnd]

┏(‘▀_▀’)ノ♬♪

// As promised, the queue'd post about the actual hive of the swarm!

// First thing's first - it's fucking GIANT. It doesn't span the whole planet, but firstly it's significantly deep and secondly w i d e. The tunnels run miles, there are dozens of 'rooms' for new larvae, food, and of course a graveyard like most hives. A lot more of the swarm is found here than on the surface, especially during the day. For some of the species living here, they never evolved to handle the heat of the dual suns with no shade. For others, it's simply Zazie needing a break. A lot of the hive is there for protection too!

// Protection from what though, you may ask? Well - Zazie is the planet, but Zazie is NOT every single bug spider worm CREATURE that you see. No, in fact the hive is particular about who they let into their underground paradise. Even creatures of the same species may not be of hive, and that's due to things like aggression and overall benefit to the planet. Creatures with adaptations that would threaten the survival of others within the hive are often outcasted or never accepted in, and creatures that are overly abundant sometimes the hive just... Doesn't have the resources to care for so many. So, sometimes there are rogue invaders who seek to take the precious resources of the collective and swarm.

// Now let's talk resources. Zazie works for the planet essentially, so their job in return for the power she gives is to keep precious and vital species alive. This doesn't just include animals though!! No man's land wasn't always a wasteland after all - that took time and overuse of resources (which led to the planet requiring a form to act through which led to Zazie is my cliffnotes bc like last time this isn't something i've thought out an awful lot). Zazie is a conservationist at their core, so their hive naturally hosts for plants who couldn't adapt to live in the heat! Water collects in the hive after rainfalls and allows moss flowers and even some spots of grass to grow!

// Now again, just like the creatures that inhabit the swarm and are native to the planet, while some of these plants may look similar to those on earth or have similar properties, they are indeed native to the planet for one very big reason. Zazie can't get the plants that were a part of SEEDS won't grow in no sunlight. No, the plants that grow within the hive are adapted to live in darkness over centuries of cultivation. They are bioluminescent and give the only light source within the hive. But it is plush, dark shades of blue and purple with gentle light blue specks that glow. These grow some food for the colony, but mostly are just Zazie's attempt to preserve what was for a future that may eventually allow the return of these species.

// Now by normal means, digging down to the depth that you hope to reach a tunnel within the hive is... DEEP deep. And by the time you'd reach it, you're more likely to have been eaten by a worm. This is subject to change depending on my RP partner, but the only one's who have potentially seen the hive and live to tell the tale are definitely Knives, but also potentially Legato. It's extremely precious to Zazie - not to mention not really great for eyes used to living in the sun - so if they take you there it's a HUGE sign of trust from the collective. It's also incredibly noisy there, considering the sheer volume of insects alone that live in its tunnels.

// Finally there's a point that's been floating in my head that felt like it fit better here than my other post just because I mentioned the graveyard - but it's awkward to insert in this in a chronological sense that might make it flow. Zazie and the swarm as a whole were based from just a few colonies of insects in their early years. As such, death to them is just an opportunity for more life - and they've seen it this way for centuries before humans. Empathy and emotions taught to them by humans have made this since complicated and messy, but the 'graveyard' is less grave and more mushroom farm - because that which dies can give new life to those around it. I know there's a very specific leafcutter ant colony that does this, but I can't think of the species at the moment. BUT. Zazie tends towards this way of thinking - and anyone precious to them is liable to get dragged from their human grave and put into this. Some insects (like flies) will also eat from corpses here. It's not the most pleasant thing to think about as a human, but I think as a colony based initially from insects it makes sense that this is the way Zazie chooses to deal with death!

// Once more, thank you for coming to my TED talk! No my headcanon posts will likely never be short, and yes this could have been far more concise... But that's why y'all love me yeah~?

[thelittlepalmtree]

I reread the chronicles of narnia over break and...wow is it christian. I do actually like the style which I have seen in other books like Coraline and The Tale of Desperaux. It also has that charm that I think we associate with modern fairytales. It seems perfect for your mother to read to you before bed which is exactly how I first experienced the series.

But now, as an adult, it feels so...simple. The sexism is insane. Not only in little jibes about girls not fighting, but also the strong stance against co-ed schools. And of course what happens to Susan is criminal she loses all of her family in one train crash and they literally laugh at her in heaven and basically imply she deserved it for wearing lipstick. Beyond the sexism, there's a strong stance for corporal punishment and having bibles at school. Of course there's the Calormen which on the audiobook all the readers tried very hard to avoid calling "color men" as that is essentially their prime feature. The implication being that these men are not human because if they were, they'd have every right to rule Narnia as much as the other characters, right? Although I suppose you could say the same for Archenland which is essentially the canada of Narnia world.

And let us not gloss over the strange relationship to imperialism. Narnia is not a land of men but it is a land for a man to rule? But of course, only if he is white and a follower of "Aslan" right? And of course, only outsiders are allowed any real part in the story. The only time the actual inhabitants of Narnia try to break away from their lion bases foreign theocracy, they are treated as dumb and stupid.

It's disheartening really that a series I loved so much as a child is one I would be uncomfortable reading to a child today. I don't even dislike the children so much it feel more like they've been taken in by a cult. Which, honestly, they have.

I still like a lot of elements of the series, but I wonder if it didn't actually damage my faith in some way. I have always been a faithless person. I never really believed in Santa Claus or God and so when I realized I didn't have to pretend to believe in them, I felt relieved. Even now, I practice wicca but I see it more as a therapeutic practice than a religious one. And the core tenant of wicca is "take what resonates and leave the rest", meaning I don't have to agree to something I don’t believe. I wonder if living in a home where there was no forgiveness for confessions of petty crimes and no warmth and a real fear of violence whether physical or psychological was so different from the world of Narnia that everything seemed like a fantasy. And the evil witches seemed more sensible. I wonder if CS Lewis could have understood a child like me, who wanted desperately to be like Lucy Pevensie but who grew into someone a bit more like Susan and even a little like Jadis. I just can't forsake my life on earth to care for a fantasy I have no promise of reaching. And was it Aslan that made the children good and kind and honest, or would it be better for them to have always been those things, for no other reason than that all children have that possibility? I wish the story had not gotten so pedantic, that the bad guys were not all invading brown men and powerful women, and non-believers. I wish that the people of the story were actually allowed to grow into people, and that a happy ending for them did not leave a person behind because she refused to be a child forever.

I don't know, obviously I have a lot of thoughts on the series. I think if I met Lewis, he wouldn't have liked me much, sadly. I am glad I reread the series, and it wasn't unenjoyable, it was just a little disappointing.

[coolblackmetal666]

(Fair warning that this post will be very unhinged and mentally ill and I'm aware that I'm maybe doing something bad here but wathever my brain is going to explode idc)

One of the only joys in my life right now (if not my only joy) is reading this new book I just bought that is just hilarious and sweet. I saw it in a bookstore when I went to Malmö for my lazer hair removal. It was called "the sisters", was on prominent display and I was immediately drawn to it for some reason.

It's like primarily about these three sisters and their relationship to each other, and when I saw the book cover with their faces and that title, my brain immediately like went "oh cool, clearly written by a woman", for some reason. Then I read the fucking name on the book and it was one of the most famous male authors in sweden, and I immediately kind of went "what the fuck is he an egg"?

Anyways, I bought the book and the structure thus far is that every other chapter is about the sisters from their perspective and every other chapter is about the author insert, and like in chapter four, it was like...

Like it was this whole entire chapter about how his dad forced him to get a haircut because he thought his long hair made him look too much like a girl and how traumatic the whole experience of getting his hair cut off was and like, look, idk, I'm kind of in an unhinged mental place right now, so it's probably nothing, but I'm grasping at reality for anything to hold onto so that I don't die, and it really feels like this is a book where someone in their middle age is for the first time exploring parts of themselves that they've never gotten to explore before, and that is like really, really comforting.

Like, I'm so deep in my internalised transphobia right now that if I read anything by a cis women about like, female friendship and relationship, my brain would kind of go like "this isn't for you, you're an invader, you can read but don't ever DARE identify with these characters because you're nothing like them and you don't share their experiences and don't think for a second that you do, because you don't".

So like, having this outlet for like female relationships and sisterhood in my life that I don't feel guilty about has been like, really, really good for me. I don't want the book to end.

(I wish I had a more sisterly relationship with my actual little sister, but I'm afraid that ship has sailed long ago and we've drifted too far apart. We still like each other, but I don't feel like we know each other and haven't in a long time and I don't want to be pushy in trying to rekindle that relationship, so the actual result is that I don't do it at all, which is one of the big griefs in my life. I should have been helping her with makeup and have had all sorts of talks with her growing up, but I couldn't, and I feel like I'm a failure of a big sister because of that, idk.)

[chicken-invaders-4-cheatsr9]

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