#theyre usually designed after sea animals usually

[gaumibear]

Octo and sea snakey🐙🐍

[monstrouslyobsessed]

some super quick ask answering!! you know the drill.

tw: sex-ual implications, links to n'sfw works, and references to gore

Oh, may I give a few recs? Not exactly the yandere ones, but monster ones – Nemu is a treasure, really! I loved monster design in Lustful Kitty Cat and Tanuki's Lover is rlly sweet xD If talking about more yandere side, A Gently Sea Monster and a Lonely Girl r kinda nice, but I'm not a fan of artstyle.

Hope u didn't mind it, have a nice day!

(here's links on that recs, pls ignore if this is too much x"D)

Few of Nemu works: Lustful kitty cat--- bato.to/series/101308/lustful-little-kitty-cat Kissing is a no-no--- bato.to/series/101223/kissing-is-a-no-no Love Marking(sequel to kissing is a no no)--- bato.to/series/105109/love-marking Pure wet love--- bato.to/series/98787/pure-wet-love Tanuki's Lover--- bato.to/series/105054/tanuki-s-lover-official --- A Gently Sea Monster and a Lonely Girl --- https://comiko.net/chapter/2044214

Again, have a nice day! —anonymous

ive read all of those!! good taste, nonnie <3 especially since ive lost couple links and i couldn’t find them again. tysm!!

note to the curious: all of these are not safe for work!! and a couple may contain noncon. proceed on your own discrete.

Lol don’t apologize, I knew it was gonna be fucked when I read the tags I just didn’t realize ppl were making hentai into psychological warfare nowadays haha —anonymous

yeah (good written) horror pron (as in with legit pron) would do that to ya, theyre not that common though, which is unfortunate as it’s a niche thing i wouldve loved to see more of. pretty rare to find a good / decent story with both horror and pron, more so with the character leads surviving in the end. you’ll find more of these in animation, but in the live action ones (which…i don’t usually browse for, tbh), it’s a huge hit or miss with mostly on the miss since what ive seen is literally just pron on the horror setting and that is it. :\

i do try and contribute to that niche however i can tho lol

Any thoughts on the upcoming FF7 Rebirth game? —anonymous

im broke and i don’t have ps5 :c but also, gimme my vinny boi. where is he.

I think your re-interpretation of the Krasue was cool. I don't see why it would be offensive. But I wonder, when reader saw him without his scarf, he ripped his torso out of the rest of his body? I didn't really understand. —anonymous

sorry nonnie! i tried to keep the story short so ive left out some details (my bad) and ive sorta kept that vague for the readers personal interpretation. i actually kinda imagined several ways the darling couldve caught him changing

i also mentioned that the neighbor also wears long sleeves and gloves, ya? so he was probably all ‘gross’ under his neck thus why he had to wear a scarf. the reader walked in on him ‘naked’.

i also paralleled the scarf to another less commonly known story, The Woman With the Ribbon Around Her Neck, in which if the ribbon is removed, the woman basically falls apart. you can assume that the scarf could potentially do the same, getting it removed would have the neighbor ‘falling’ apart, so to say. the reader walked on him ‘falling’ apart the seconds after he’d discarded his scarf to let his ‘skin’ breathe or whatever.

another way is that, he was hiding the scars you'd have commonly seen with the dead who’d undergone the autopsy, but the stitches couldn’t keep him ‘together’ well enough so he’d have to wear a scarf and everything else to hide the fact that he was basically a walking corpse slash a monster possessing a human skin. the reader walked on him and caught the sight of his abnormal stitches and the neighbor probably started overreacting upon seeing his darling and tore himself out of his body or something. idk.

those are just several possibilities though (i…actually liked them all and i couldn’t decide on which to implement), but all revolving around the fact that the neighbor obviously never wanted to show any bit of naked skin but his face for good reasons + the reader being oblivious / a bit pushy about it.

i actually tried to have the story to sound a little like a common myth to teach a lesson about being too curious / too trusting but idk if that came cross that clearly.

hope that explained some??

and ig im being a bit of worrywart. i never wanted to offend anyone over their cultural values, as their culture is an important part of who they are.

slowly chipping away at my inktober thing. no promises though, since its giving me a bit of trouble and having debates if its too long or not lol

also, yep, im shadowbanned. i'll be posting a bit more about that tonight. gonna try and appeal. sighs.

as always, my inbox is always open for whatever~!

[pretty-pink-seaslug]

THEYRE FINALLY FINISHED FOR THE LOVE OF GOD ITS OVER—

💸 Paper & Scissors 🔪

transparent designs under cut!

DEAR GOD IVE BEEN WORKING ON THIS LITERALLY SINCE SPLATOON3 TESTFIRE SPLATFEST WAS OVER,,, I THOUGHT THIS WOULD BE A FUN LITTLE PROJECT,,, IVE BEEN WORKING ON THIS FOR WHAT FELT LIKE 7 YEARS—

PAPER AND SCISSOR GIJINKAS BECAUSE IF SCISSOR COULDNT WIN I WANTED PAPER TO WIN SO BAD AND THAT SPLATFEST WAS SO RIGGED

❤️Design tidbits!💛

I made Scissor-sama’s design overall more sharp in comparison to Paper-sama’s being more flat (paper flat chest justice—)

Scissor has a hashtag tattoo’d on her hand because in music language it’s called a sharp note

Scissor is a sea slug because I wanted to give at least one of them horns—

The stripes on Scissor’s hair are meant to look like cuts and slashes

Both pigtails (and the bangs) have 3 tendrils respectively because Scissors is the 3rd team

Paper-sama (there is no yellow text color) has a leopard print pattern in her hair because when I looked up “yellow squid” it had a pattern kinda resembling leopard print (and also because animal print is the height of style fight me—)

The runes on Paper’s talismans (also talismans because paper) say “Two” and “Chop” (Chop because you chop down trees to make paper, and Two because it’s the 2nd team)

Paper has those piñata frills because those are usually made out of paper

She has cuffs at the start of her socks and gloves because they’re usually on office shirts, office shirts = you work at an office = you use a lot of paper (also they’re usually made from polyester and polyester feels like paper I hate polyester—)

Paper has a lot of jewelry because she has a lot of paper (money)

PAPER WAS SUPPOSED TO HAVE A NOSE RING LIKE THE PULL RING ON A CHAINSAW BUT I FORGOT TO TURN THE LAYER BACK ON,,,

Now for other design tidbits!

Scissor-sama has scissor blades for heels, meanwhile Paper-sama has razor blades on her jelly heels (I just chose jellies because they look pretty)

I chose the popsicle pattern background (shoutout ibisPaint assets 💖) because it’s red and yellow and ALSO because ✨global warming summer✨

I’ll be real I didn’t know what to do for the background I just didn’t want it to be one solid color—

The inklish says “Paper” and “Scissors” respectively 📄✂️

Since I started this after the testfire results went live, this piece took me roughly 12 days.

The light grey gradienting to normal grey is supposed to represent it being metallic,,, I tried my best,,,

K that’s everything, ty for reading if you did! I’ll reblog this post with extra detail shots because mobile tumblr sucks

[kindestegg]

Pspspspspsp ROMEO do you have any ocs 😳

HI!! yes i DO x3 i have a lot, for many different universes n stories... the most developed ones ive got are for some stories involving toons... tho i dont have a lot of new art for them, but i can give brief descriptions on what im developing!

the first story ive got in mind is a story called “razz and juliana into the dark sea” (kind of a working title but probs wont change it much). it follows the protagonists, razz and juliana, two brazilian kids who are best friends, as they end up activating and getting sucked into a portal for a strange underwater world hidden beneath the old ink factory that used to belong to juliana’s (presumed dead) grandfather.

razz is a VERY energetic kid, they embody the feeling like you could do anything as a child, and they often feel like they are a human cartoon. theyre also very curious and friendly, so when meeting and seeing new things in their journey, they will be the first to want to explore and say hello

juliana on the other hand is a very sweet and calm girl, and is more of the voice of reason between the two. when it comes to calming down razz shes usually the best one at the job, but that doesn’t mean she doesn’t enjoy their shenanigans, in fact she finds it very fun! she just hopes they can have fun without breaking stuff.

then there is “silly world!”, which tells the story of a girls journey into yet another world of cartoons, but with a much less friendly protagonist, who is also older.

the protag in question being nora, who is pulled out of detention after she stabbed a bully with her trusty scissors (weapon of choice) by a friendly character called veeveehead, who promises to bring her to a world that is much more fun. nora starts out rather annoyed at veeveehead’s shenanigans and really at this whole silly world shes pulled into, and ends up discovering some darker secrets. thankfully, the friendships she will build will help.

nora herself is a teenager, think around 15, shes very deadpan and has kind of a grim outlook, she is somewhat violent and is constantly alert to any danger that might come to her. you dont have to dig deep down to understand she is actually a good person though, shes just scared and hurting.

finally there is “the world is dead”, which follows five cartoon protagonists of different eras of animation brought together through some kind of scientific experiment to purge the world off of zombies by dancing and reminding their souls of happy times so their spirits can move on.

we have mimi the cat witch, from the 20-40s, a peppy little cat from the black and white cartoons, accompanied by her talking broom and wand.

then we have wally the weasel, from the 50s - early 70s, a fast talking criminal weasel who delights on stealing for himself and tripping up nature guards.

from the late 70s to the 80s, weve got paula pavon, the leader of a magical species of bird people who live in the clouds and sing and dance to neon lights to save the world from pollution.

the 90s to early 2000s is kool foxx, a cool rapper fox who loves to skate and has starred in his own video games! he is responsible and teaches kids safety in the coolest way possible.

and finally late 2000s to early 2010s is starla, an embassador of the earth who travels to space to keep a conflict between alien races from happening, and works as a great diplomat. she actually takes the role of the leader of the group, due to her determined personality and abilities to make such a group of unique creatures work together.

(i actually DO have art for them but damn its old ndfgjsdg but the designs are more or less the same as seen here)

[liquidstar]

10, 20, 30, 40, 50 teehee!

10. Introduce an OC with a complicated design?

Well… generally speaking i dont think i have very complex designs, maybe some more than others but theyre usually not super intricate! Though I think sometimes the more intricate parts of my designs end up being hair-thats-not-hair, because that’s a design trope I love to do. I can’t pinpoint one specific oc though, since it’s several!! Sorry 😅

20. Do any of your OCs sing? If they sing, care to share more details (headcanon voice, what kind of songs they like etc)?

I feel like most of my ocs are probably average at singing, usually it’s not something I feel the need to elaborate on except for characters whose whole thing is music! For example, Viscaria from the atheaverse bc her magic is based on which instruments she uses as a wand. And Lyre and Aoede from the polarisvese, bc their powers are lullaby (literally jigglypuff powers) and soundwave (rocking so hard on the guitar that it causes actual damage) so, again more music-themed characters lol.

30. Which one of your OCs would most likely have a secret stuffed animal collection?

Aster did as a kid and it has too much sentimental value to throw away so she kept them all and is really defensive about it because she has to keep up appearances as a cool former knight and current teacher (she cannot let her students know her embarrassing secrets bc theyre assholes and will bully her abt it)

40. Any fond memories linked to your characters? Feel free to share!

Oh i answered this one! heehee

50. Give me the good ol’ OC talk here. Talk about anything you want

Lets see…… oh! A while back i remember i posted a character based on a design that struck me in an ai anime girl generator, and i decided to actually use the character in the polarisverse!

I called her “blue” at the type, but i ended up naming her Ran, from the star named after the norse sea goddess. She’s 13 years old, she’s a runaway who ended up joining the guild after stowing away on Vela’s ship, and she sort of became their adopted daughter and first mate on her ship (which is a promotion from stowaway). Her power is short-distance teleportation, it may not get her fat but it’s accurate! And her weapon is a net gun. I’m not changing her design so she still does not have a mouth, she signs to talk and well, if she wants to eat she can just teleport the food like that one scene from drake and josh with “henry doheny” lol

[channieskzlove94]

at the top of my recipes list is japchae because i had a mildly scarring experience with a local restaurant and i still dont know what vegetable(?) i found in it but it very uncomfortable to not know what i was going to be consuming and the next one is mango sticky rice which is actually really simple but everyone in my house loved it when i ordered some from a thai food truck (it was so good, wed had it before? but this was from an authentic thai owned food truck and it showed)

block b is so good! honestly some of my favorite songs come from groups that are disbanded or pretty much there topp dogg? theyre everything imo, 4minute? everything and more, and i wish i had gotten into kpop earlier but i live in a terrible area to be encouraged to view outside cultures

i think my favorite historical drama is the untamed (its chinese) because music is so prevalent also its very fantasy and despite the forced censorship regarding the main relationship (theres a whole uncensored novel) its still very apparent to me that theyre in love and stuff which i deeply appreciate but its incredibly long so it really brought out the worst in my attention span issues, ive also started watching rookie historian and i really like it so far but im not that far into it :/ i really relate to being totally absorbed in a drama and stuff though, if something really spectacularly catches my attention (without being 50 episodes all being 45 minutes long) i really get sucked in and its like all over for anything else

only one of my geckos ever tries to bite? and its only very occasionally- we try to leave him alone for the most part because its after a lot of handling. one of our geckos is albino! shes super super pretty but were really super careful about lights and stuff because of her eyes- i obviously cant make your decision for you but if you decide to get something other than a rodent maybe check give/donate the items to your friend and the shelter? because there are things your friend probably wouldnt need like another cage (obviously assuming you dont think youll get another rodent in the future)

mugs are super fun! i have a couple of fun mugs i was given as gifts and my favorite one is a black one that turns into the skyrim opening scene as it gets hot! also i looked at the mugs you mentioned and theyre super cute! i like rocks and shells and stuff as souvenirs (legally obtained, i bought a gypsum rose once and my life will never be the same)

tbh i cant pick between coffee or tea. im a bit of a snob when it comes to individual roasts and sources or types of tea (especially when it comes to earl grey) i also cant pick between iced or hot for either- its all go its place :)

im excited for you to see my blog too! ive not had my kpop sideblog for the entire time ive been into kpop? but its packed full of so much stuff! i actually didnt have all that many friends on tumblr? im 19 though so it kinda died down quite a bit among people my age, like obviously people are still joining the site but i feel as though its not As Big if that makes sense? also smth smth conservative hicksville, ohio population: many

it sucks that you couldnt attend that particular lecture but you might be able to find other events similar to it hosted on youtube or other various sites

whats one place in the world you want to visit assuming unlimited funds, n health n stuff? it can be a monument or a museum or a country or a city and it doesnt have to be some place youve never been before either. i think id like to see the ocean i dont even care where i am as long as i can actually see the sea or maybe go back to marble head lighthouse (its on lake erie) even though im terrified of heights- i went for what i think was my eighth birthday and it was pretty great all things considered

the melatonin i took is starting to kick in extra hard right about now so im sorry if something is confusing but i really do gotta go-🌻

oooh japchae!!! yes i love japchae. i think if you find a good recipe and make sure you aren’t unfamiliar with any of the ingredients it should probably be delicious when you make it! i’ll definitely check out the untamed! that sounds super interesting. and since there’s a novel i might see if i could read it! i hope they have a translated version or i’m doomed haha.  i’m not sure the shelter would take my cage but i’ll definitely donate the other stuff if i decided to get anything other than another rodent! hamsters require a lot of room to run around and dig so i made a big cage for her. it’s a little janky since it’s homemade so i think they shelter would probably say thanks but no thanks haha.  i have a terrible fear of being bit after a traumatic childhood experience with a hamster that would let go of my hand. i’ve gotten better at it but anytime i meet new animal species it’s always the first thing on my mind.  the gypsum rose sounds and looks super cool! i did a quick google search. do you have a shelf where you keep them and display them? do you label them?  I feel you on the tumblr thing. i’m 26 and most of my friends are completely out of the tumblr space. i came from a really small town in pennsylvania so i completely understand the conservative hicksville struggle. i went to japan one summer between 9th and 10th grade and when i got back everyone that it was weird that i had even wanted to go there.  when i was like 10 my parents and I went to the Crayola museum and it was so much fun. i have such fond memories of walking around and learning about the crayons and i just thought it was all so fascinating. i’d love to go back there. i’ve never been to a lighthouse before so that would be a lot of fun! i’m not suuuuper terrified of heights unless it’s like really really high! 

your fear of heights reminds me of minho in the fandom tour episode where they go to nami island. it’s so cute how he makes IN help him over to get on the zipline.  melatonin always hits me so hard. when i wake up in the morning i feel like i got hit by a truck and i usually end up sleeping through my alarm.  if you could meet any person in the world who would it be? i mean obviously i want to meet kpop stars but i’d love to meet the film director wes anderson. I love the way he frames and designs his films and i love to learn more about his inspirations.

[grodyego]

alright folks we’re kickin off femslash february with my two Original Girls

some of u who’ve followed me for a good amount of time have probably seen pepper and annie before!! theyre my two oldest ocs who i still keep around and finally their Love and Story r revealed under the cut

pepper (the snaggle-toothed fish wonder up there) and annie (the lanky beauty queen) are 16 & 17 respectively !! a big chunk of their story revolves around their relationship as it develops all the way thru to the the kind of Underlying Story Arc about the world ending (we’ll get to that)

pepper is the only one of her species and is as u can expect generally very lonely bc of this. she lives in a cave by a lake full of nasty leviathan-like creatures that r locked in it pandora’s box style with her “uncle” who is just a big sea serpent monster. her n uncle’s job is to look over the lake and make sure no Bad People or Creatures try to work the whole situation to their nasty whims (which has happened before). pepper herself is super dedicated to this job even though she sucks and she hates it, she feels like the end of the world like... overwhelmingly outweighs her disdain 4 the whole thing. she’s very proud and hotheaded, and pretty, usually very high-energy too, but she is genuinely like... a very sweet & loyal person. she has a v big heart and tends to believe in the general Good in everyone n everything, and would never dream of hurting someone/something (who didnt deserve it or wasnt food). pepper likes collecting rad bones and rocks from the bottom of the lake, hot dogs, stories, drawing, and Adventure. she has bpd and is autistic !!

annie lives in a rlly nice neighborhood with her dad who is unbelievably flush with cash (which is how she can afford such nice clothes and makeup). she’s an absolute fashionista and is pretty popular at her highschool, which would set her up for the Mean Girl Queen Bee stereotype except she’s just like... a very cool, down to earth person. she genuinely polite and even helpful 2 everyone, and very sensible, earning her Mom Friend status purely by default... she takes a fencing class (which shes v into) and wants 2 be a fashion designer when she grows up. outside of that she likes baking and reading high fantasy novels. she has npd and is a trans girl

they meet when annie, after wondering Deep into the woods n running into some gnarly animals and getting chased into the lake (she cant swim) is saved from drowning by pepper, who puts her initial suspicion aside bc.... damn is she lonely........ and annie is so Nice she cant bring herself 2 even rlly scare her off. annie offers 2 take pepper to her house n get her some new clothes and hot food as thanks 4 saving her life and after a few wacky antics they become friends and then Girlfriends

[s-nnyd]

all of the ask me meme :) please stop talking about naruto

i think that was this one?

rose: what makes you feel beautiful?

man, hmm, when my hair falls just right and it looks like the hairstyle that could be used in like a romcom drama oh or when the sun starts to set because everythign just starts to feel like the right color and it makes it just about everything right

lace: how would you describe your best friend(s)?

complete idiots i love hanging out with

wish: what are your favourite memories?

oh fuck dude my favorite memories? okay so back in middle school when there was the open house and i signed up for one of the shifts i just stayed in ms. dean’s room and like it was raining and pouring and i was just kinda fooling around with some friends before our shifts started and like we ordered pizza and my goodness it was cold and wet as fuck but it was such a genuinely nice memory of just the feeling during that time also when were painting murals for  art ds like shit man that was like the time of my life and i genuinely get all these heartfelt feelings each time i think about it (oh oh oh oh and like mrs q said that like shes trying to make things work with walker about doing a mural inside the class and im like holy fuck please like im legit gonna cry if that happens) and although its super embarrassing just like all the times ive ever really had talks and hung out with mrs q like they were genuinely nice memories and esp friday too like she told me stories about the previous schools she went to and the types of students she had and i love hearing stuff like that and yesterday was truly enjoyable

heaven: describe your ideal date

hhhhhhhh okay okay okay okay so its raining out but we still were supposed to meet up and im standing outside with a cup of hot choco with extra whip cream just the way she likes it cause i wanted to get it for her and when she comes to meet me she also has a cup of hot choco with extra cocoa for me and its just the kinda heart and chest swelling kinda moment cause we both were thinking about each other and then we head over to watch the movies first something stupid yet enjoyable and after going to have some lunch at like a really good tofu house and then after going to an art museum and then ill say somethign cheesy like man im surprised you dont live here ‘why?’ cause youre a work of art  or you know whats the most beautiful piece of art out of this whole exhibit ‘ooo was it the ______ or the _____ one or maybe its the ______?” nah its you and thats the main commentary im making through out the whole exhibition and like after that we head over to my place and the rains still coming down my head on her lap and her fingers through my hair as watch a movie both of us has seen far too many times already that it this point its just for the sake of background noise and like we swap spots where shes on my lap now adn eventually she falls asleep i carry her to the bed and let her nap for a bit and she wakes up after a while and comes into the kitchen and im cooking fried rice at like 3 in the morning and its just lazy hugs and bad singing but all in all its just relaxing soothing loving and everything i really want

angel: what is your dream aesthetic?

oh man like okay have you seen that godzilla jacket that was floating around on tumblr for a while like like that specific aesthetic where its super cool stitching and japanese words that i can actually read for once OH OH OH or like just absolute artist like just paint splatters and charcoal and pastel that wont wash out and jean jackets with patches and just yeeeeeee

wings: list five things you love about yourself

hmmm i think my determination to always be improving, my loyalty, my ability to think from multiple angles of a situation, my creativity and the multitude of ideas that come as a result of it , and mmm prolly the fact that when i love someone or got a crush like more than anything id love to give them the absolute most like id give them the world if i could if it would make them happy and like they dont gotta accept my feelings or anything but jsut please dont reject my gifts like i just want you to be happy and i wanna see you smile and laugh and like even if this aint gonna turn anything im glad i got to love you and have this experience

marble: what do you look for in a partner?

oh man okay so like ive noticed that every single person ive ever had a crush on like  i dont necessarily got a type in the sense of like looks or anything like that cause they all look super different and there is no one “type” but like its a lot closer to a “type” as in a type of person like someone whos generally super open minded and caring and gentle someone who even though they dont believe so theyre changing and helping so so so so many people around them someone who has the best laugh that id do anything to hear and the prettiest eyes and the most amazing smile that id truly do anythign to see someone whos usually loved by many but even in close relations theyre extremely close heart to heart and very attentive someone whos got a great head on their shoulders and the mindset to keep moving forward and improve someone who rlly pushes the idea communication, trust, and honesty and like man theyre people with the most beautiful minds and hearts and like it ends up being a case where theyve got the most beautiful face too

velvet: describe your dream home

oh fuck dude i couldnt even talk about this for my project for japanese i cant do it here

pearl: what is your favourite: scent, flavour, sound, texture?

shit dude ive really gotta say that my favorite scent is prolly the art and the ceramics room like really its super calming my fave flavor would maybe be honey? (i just had a honey stick rn so) my favorite sound is the sound of my crush’s voice and laugh, fave texture has def gotta be my paint like fuck i love sticking my hand in that shit

sunlight: list five things you find to be beautiful

link, zelda, my crush, the specific color of cerulean blue, okay and oddly enough that scar thats on my leg from when i fell off my skateboard

cherry: what words of advice would you give to a stranger?

if you think someone’s got a cool shirt, pretty eyes, a nice laugh, the cutest button nose, a soothing voice, or is just in general attractive to you, just tell them like the smile on their face is worth a whole lot and i promise you that it could make their day

blush: describe your ideal future

oh fuck okay so its one where i got a like four big dogs (cause these are my faves), a samoyed a husky a german shepard and a pit bull, and im living in a nice decent place with my loved one i have a job either at one of the major animation studios or im working with a huge game company (preferably Nintendo so i can work on some loz games) and ive also got a seperate place thats a block or two away from my home and its my own personal studio a place that is just a whole floor dedicated to working on my art whether it be two dimensional traditional or digital and i also got a throwing wheel and a place to put my ceramics and ive made some movies and games that ive dedicated to mrs q and mrs y because theyve brought me so far in my art career and also played such a big role in my life in general and id love to make them proud and like honestly that soudns like the absolute shit to me

sea: what music, art and/or literature brings you peace?

hhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh man just seein loz fanart is the best but also like fuck dude like mmmmm when i see an art style i really love that has literally the best fuckign composition and color usage like fuck thats my shit like theres some specific ones that i dont know how to describe

wine: talk about something you are looking forward to

working on that mural if mrs q can make it through cause that is legit what i really wanna do like i fucking love working on murals oh oh oh also when we can finally order the new j shirts cause i finished the design and i really wanna see everyone wearing them im really proud of this year’s design aalsososoooooooo like im really excited to work on the next project for ceramics like were makign slab boxes and we can basically tell a story and do whatever the fuck we want with it and man im just so excited for that (wow i legit realized that like everything ive listed that is part of my dream or makes me excited or happy is like art related like wow)

honey: what do you do to relax?

i watch shitposts oh that or i talk to my cousin lynnette cause really shes super understanding and its really easy to talk to her

silk: describe your most recent dream

man i forgot the bulk of it but i think like it was one where i didnt finish my charcoal portrait or my coil pot in time and then i woke up in a cold sweat

matte: what is something you are proud of?

hmmmm at current im proud of the presents i gave to mrs y and mrs q cause it made the both of them really happy and like i really wanted to show them how thankful i am to them and like they genuinely liked the posters and the flowers

gloss: list ten songs you love right now

lmao shit uh

feelings - hayley kiyoko

maple - hayley kiyoko

redbone - childish gambino

forrest gump - frank ocean

shes so mean - matchbox twenty

perfect - ed sheeran

and legit just like all of the soundtracks for all the loz games

satin: what never fails to make you happy?

oh oh oh oh oh when i give a present to my crush or i do something nice for them and they just give me the biggest smile or the best laugh ive ever heard and theres just the crinkle at the corners of their eyes from smilign so hard and because theyre trying so hard to keep eye contact with me while but theyre laughing really hard and they can only keep one eye open and like just the genuineness of joy and all

opal: talk about your interests and passions

hhhhhhhh dude dude like mannnnnn like hhhhhh okay imma talk about loz for a sec and like i know i brought it up before but i love like so much okay like oot was my first time playing time playing any loz game and my lord it was the shit like the storyline the characters the graphics the sound track the quests and side characters liek everything really made it feel like so much mroe and like i feel so much for it like heres link growing up and hes like what around ten or so and hes got some friends and he finally gets his fairy and then his tree dad goes and dies right after telling him lmao sorry but you kinda gotta save the kingdom k bye and like this kid this kid literally knows jack shit about anything but he goes on and does it anyways he goes and helps zelda he goes and helps the people who are in trouble along the way and plays some rad ass tunes on his tiny lil ocarina of time while doing it and like even when he gets put into the future like he sitll has the mindset of a ten year old hes still as innocent and earnest and pure hearted as when he first started and like holy fuck dont get me started on sheik like shit sheik is so damn cool and like knowing that it was zelda all that time like fuck yeah zelda can kick ass fuck yeah zelda got muscles for days fuck yeah she can punt you across the kingdom and like at the end when she thanks him and sends him back and time so he can enjoy the lost time like shit dude i know zelda meant well and all but like hes experienced so much with and for her hes done so much give the kid a break and then even then navi in the end like leaves and then eveything continues in majoras mask and again hes in his ten year old body but now wiht the experiences and knowledge and basically memories from being seventeen like hes got so much mroe than what his body and mind should handle at this point and he wanders into the forest again all in search for an old friend to look for navi and like when he gets sent to termina after trying to chase after skull kid and like havign those nightmares witht he scrubs like hes gone through so much and i only want more for him and like he doesnt have to save termina he doesnt he doesnt need to do anything he can let termina get smooshed to smitherins by the moon for all the work hes already done for hyrule but he does it anyway and he rewinds time again and again and again and again so he can fix all of these problems for all of these people he does all of this to bring some sort of proper ending for these people who have the last three days of their lives the last three days before their deaths repeat over and over and over and over and over again and he saves them each and every time he rewinds time and he goes through all this shit i mean this ten year old mother fucker is doing olympic bakc flips and twirls and shit after oot like shit boi and then like oh myy gooddddd like damn botw like fuck dude that game means a whole lot to me like its lacking a lil bit in the presence of an evil and i mena i know its ganon and all but like shit i could ignore that motherfucker for all eternity if he wasnt being such a total asshat to zelda and like i mainly beat that motherfucker up just for zelda like for once in a game ive never wanted more to save her like they went so much into detail abotu her and like dude those memories thos cutscenes? like that shit made everythign and i truly love her she works so hard and shes held up to this image of being extremely spiritiually adept because of all her ancestors ebcause of all the other zeldas but she jsut cant she jsut cant do the same thing and so she tries in other ways she tries to udnerstand and get a grasp on sheikah and ancient tech so she can at least be prepared to stand against the calamity when it does come and like the champions all worry about her like the girl nearly got herself killed in the process of trying to awaken her so called spiritual powers and like dude finding out that in the beginning zelda legit hated links ass like they put so much mroe into her like she she hated seeing that he was a prodigy that he didnt have a single trouble in the world and then finally link speaks up and he tells her he talks to her about why he keeps quiet and like the two finally bond and like the two dorks love each other so much that it really does go beyond friendship and romance like they legit would die for each other that one time that zelda was this fucking close to getting her ass handed to her on a silver platter and link was beat the fuck up like he went to save her and then the time when link was basically on his death bed and a guardian was about to pulverize him zelda stood between him and the guardian this bitch wasnt even thinking about having her spiritual powers she was legit ready to die for him if it meant he could run away and get to safety and i mean luckily she her spiritual powers did come out but she legit realized it when she was so genuinely scared but chose to stand up cause she cared for him so much and like these two kids fight so much and have gone through a lot both on their own times and also together but like i love them so much no matter what timeline theyre in

kiss: what do you want from life right now?

my lord i want life to point me in the right direction tbqh or at least give me a mentor for some help like please ive been guiding and doing everything myself this whole time give me a break like after reading all the stories for lang and lit like it makes me feel so lost in what im doing like after catcher in the rye and playing the role of holden caulfield and denying that i fit any part of the role and then realizing how similar i was to him and then reading death of a salesman and relating to biff and reading raisin in the sun and relating to beneatha like shit i really felt lost like ive been talking about it with my therapist lately and like yeah i think i really need some direction or reassurance or a mentor or at least something in my life thats consistent cause right now im a complete mess

[vitalmindandbody]

Admissions Of A F* ckboy: I Donated To A Sperm Bank And It Was Such A Tour

Walking out of your accommodation with the intent to masturbate is an uneasy feeling.

Its uneasier knowing youll be doing so legally, safe from the handcuffs and stigma that follow the demoralizes whamming off in the subway.

I truly had to snicker at the believed to be the whole thought. There are loopholes everywhere in this nature, as long as you know how to find them. And here I was, swiping my MetroCard with a hop-skip in my pace and an attention toward one of those imaginary destinations you know is real, but hidden, crammed into metropolis like secrets.

The sperm bankwas a place that didnt merely examine fondly on masturbation, butit and would compensate you for it.

As far as loopholes croak, the sperm bank, just by prevailing, felt like a long overdue affirmation to my 12 -year-old self, who, I swear to God, would have ejected on his eggs every morning if he could.

Because no matter who he grows to be, every adult male comes from a squirming, semen-crazed cretin conducted around for years by the incorrect psyche. Its embarrassing on some stage, but real and inevitable and completely normal on another.

Its important to remember who you are and where you come from.

I hate my 12 -year-old self, but hes certainly good-for-nothing to be scared of, and he deserves some enjoy because it was all he required. So I channeled him as I skipped off the metro and into the shambolic normality of Lexington Avenue atnoon.

Walking against congestion, I weaved and swerved through the 401( k) combat: dejected investment categories, the wind blowing their ties up their cervixes; preppy, young go-getters, wearing purple on purpose; measured women around pantsuits onhands-free labels; bald managers indicating off every possible face spaces, windshields, the wind itself.

Everything steel, everything imposing, everything sculpted. Yet, somehow, everything also severely edgeless.

I often feel like an infiltrator in this field, whichfeelslike one large-scale savings account is built around Yes Men and 40 th-floor favors. Like me, all of them had1 2-year-old versions of themselves, but theyd all been thumped out of them, like boners tucked up in the waistbands of their own lives.

After split second of investigating their faces, their headaches were plain to read: These parties seemed entirely unaware of their close proximity to a biology lab that mostly doubled as a modern succor terminal. They involved a release.

I smiled at them from under sunglasses as I approached the labs build: a grey-haired monstrosity branded as country offices spa. Glass doorways discriminated the street from a lily-white, modern lobby.

A concierge buzzed me through without judgment.Instead, he grinned, too. That corroborated mine and redoubled as a tap on my 12 -year-old selfs shoulder, almost as if to allege: See buddy, you werent so bad after all.

For those who dont know, sperm banks( or cryobanks) accumulate and distribute donated bodily fluids and tissues to people who need such things. The broth is disproportionatelysemen, but also includes embryos, oocytes, ovarian tissue, testicular materials, and more.

Sperm tests are analyzed for effectivenes, condition, vitality and health and, if accepted, are frozen until a later date. Women interested in in vitro fertilization then re-examine stored tests, hand selecting characteristics theyd prefer in their child.

This establishes cryobanksthe ultimate Darwinian battlefield.

In vitro fertilization isnt uncommon, but its still comparatively uncommon, and given the size of the potential donor base, requirements are strict. Most banks wont accept a donor shorter than five foot seven, and overweight donors are generally repudiated. Some clinics admit only 1 percent of donor applicants.

Certain qualities are in higher request statistically. Mothers miss their children are derived from physicians more often than from taxi operators, for example. Theyd rather their babies not havecertain genetic fragilities, like a familial record of diabetes.

They likewise disproportionally crave semen of Italian genealogy, for whatever reason.

In vitro fertilization is commonly an upper class alternative, so it simply constitutes sense that such fathers would prefer donors with more white collar professions, backgrounds and appearances.

Basically, what that mean for dudes is: If you want to be a donor, you need to be towering, strong, fit for rearing and an admirable representation of traditional success.

Blue-eyed, spaghetti-loving intelligence surgeons who are somehow six-foot-four and free atnoonon aThursday thats the archetype. The world is, most donors are young men with flexible hours who could use the money. Like me.

I pressed the elevator button and squirmed anxiously as the doors closed, agitated to be acknowledged that my swimmers stacked up.

If you want to be a donor, “youve got to be” towering, strong, is suitable for raising and an admirable of traditional success. Blue-eyed, spaghetti-loving brain surgeons who are somehow six-foot-four and free at noon on a Thursday thats the archetype. The actuality is, most donors are young men with flexible hours who could use the currency. Like me.

The fourth floor opened to a tiled hallway lining two disconnected place infinites. The kind of fluorescent dawns youd see in a dentist officebathed the corridor, committing it a infertile look, like somehow this is only the test tube and you were already in it. A really strange meta/ horny combo ethos crowded the room.

And that was when I went past all the jizz decorations.

Thats right, jizz emblems. At the conclusion of its hallway, two glass entrances signaled the entryway to the donor part of the cryobank. Through the glass, it ogled not unlike your usual physicians bureau waiting room: portable chairs rowing a direction to a receptionist window, a non-functioning television hanging above apprehensive patients, publications, snacks.

But if you zoomedOUT and focused on the doors themselves, it suddenly became apparent this wasnt a typical clinic.

You know how a kindergarten teacher will print out unthreatening cartoons of swine, like a lion, and staple them to abulletin board? Its for medal, but its too supposed to help the minors informed about vowels, and lion has two vowels in it.

But they dont magazine out an image of a lion destroying a zebra carcass. They print out an image of him smiling, returning a thumbs up whatever.

Well, the glass openings of this clinic are decorated with similar epitomes of sperm. Earnestly. Animated blue swimmers glued to the doors accepted donors in what purposes as a disarmingly transparent salute and super-effective confirmation that, yes, theyre in the right place.

A printout speaking DONOR ENTRANCE sits scotched-taped between the imitation swimmers. The clinic literally shapes you walk through the sea to come in.

So, thats what I did.

They construct you fill out species. Lots of forms.

The booklet sat eight pages late in the clipboard. A heated, post-grad liberal character with a Lena Dunham haircut handed it to me at the receptionists desk, right before informing me I wouldnt be paid for this visit.

I accepted her as the woman whod answered my email inquiry and scheduled the visit. Donors are only paid after theyve been accepted, she spoke. Today was my trial run.

All right, I mentioned. I understand.

I sat down with my brand-new publication. The extend sheet was filled with foreground verse and capital letters.

PLEASE READ INSTRUCTIONS CAREFULLY.

WRITE CLEARLY AND LEGIBLYON ALL PAPERWORK.

WRITE TODAYS DATE ON EVERY PAGE WHERE DESIGNATED.

PRINT YOUR FULL LEGAL NAME AT THE BOTTOM OF EVERY PAGE.

PLEASE INITIAL AND DATE ANY CORRECTIONS THAT HAVE BEEN MADE.

Very ominous, all these directions. Exceedingly clinicalNot exactly an aphrodisiacal environment.

I flip-flop the page.

First, they want to know all your medical record, then all your genetic history, then all the medical record of your family.

Do you have any history of epilepsy, of hepatitis, of Zika, of this, of that? How many maternal uncles do you have? How many paternal aunts? Where did they come from? Where are they now?

Have “youve been” traveled out of the country? Where? Have you ever traveled in different countries? When? Where? Have you ever been incarcerated? Do you have sounds? Pages and pages of this.

Finally, you turn to a page that asks you to detail your sexual record. The questionnaire asks you how many sexual partners youve had in the past 12 months, then asks you to list them and gives youspaces to do so. Five.

Not merely do they expect me to recollect my sex partners, but they are leave room for five? Hilarious.

I literally burst into laughter.Good happen I was the only one waiting.

The questionnaire asks you how many sexual partners youve had in the past 12 months, then asks you to itemize them and gives you five spaces to do so. Five. Not exclusively do they expect me to remember my sexual marriages, but they are leave room for five? Hilarious. I literally burst into laughter.

Youre likewise asked to itemize what shield you used, every time, with each partner. It was an depleting exercise in reminiscence and defy that I ultimately succumbed to.

I couldnt help but lie on that portion. I only didnt know.

Shortly after, a man penetrated mid-3 0s, blue sweater, classy jeans, bald manager and whisker. He looked as if he could be coming from anywhere in New York.

Walking up to the receptionist, he removed a card from his pocket and swiped it against a card reader while in stride. The readers initiated a light-headed a opening guiding within the agency, unlocking it.

I mustered he was an active donor, a person who had already well underway screened. Active donors are frequently allowed to donate several times per week. Each season, they received about as much money as I do for these columns.

The man didnt look up or clear attention contact with anyone. He just marched in.

Because Im a dick, I made a document of the time.

Over the next fewminutes, I fucked up the forms multiple times while my blood sugar descended considerably and while, I reckon, Bald Man experienced himself.

I sided my completed application form to the Lena Dunham woman, was told to wait and then was handed them back by a cheery, unionized type who emerged from the back of the agency and put me more in the mood.

She had complicated brown seeings that bristled with this concoction of compassion and permission and you want to fuck me matter-of-factness. They almost became me guilty for being there, selling the future infants I could legitimately suppose establishing her.

This entire slouse needs to be filled in, she told me calmly.

I missed an entire division?

She smiled like I wasnt the first idiot, and wouldnt be the last.

I missed lunch, was my lame excuse.

Thats why we have snacks, she answered. Help yourself.

I hadnt discovered just how stunning a collecting of treats this waiting room offered popcorn, corn microchips, protein barrooms, granola rails, trail concoction, cheese scrabbles (!!).

Being the only one there, I decided to load up before Bald Man reemerged. I went to town, spraying crumbs all over the questionnaire, which was now asking me which street medications, if any, Id assimilated in the past two weeks. You mean besides cheese scrabbles?

I reverted the forms. Boss Lady approved them, eyeing the popcorn scraps on my upper cheek. She asked me a few more wonders, squinted suspiciously and asked me to sit again.

On the practice back to my chair, I find a portable refrigerator in the reces of the room. It was labeled DONOR REFRIGERATOR.

, I belief,

Boss Lady receded out of display, and “its just” me again. I had half a sentiment to openup the refrigerator and picture for myself when Bald Man rose again from the glass openings, his head down, never bursting his speed as he departed in a hurry.

I look back my watch. 11.5 hours. I thought.

Lena Dunham instructed me to walk through the glass openings to a back area where I would situate my test. She handed me an empty plastic beaker with a off-color name, a sticker with my figure on it.

After youve deposited your test, youll realise labelled go-carts in the hallway, she said. Youll leave your test there to be analyzed, and well advise you in a few days.

I nodded and saw my road down the passageway where four tiny quiz rooms waited, all exhaust. I chose the most significant one and looked at my watch.

The room was coated blood-red and nondescript. A single portable chair sat in the middle, next to an intent counter. A subside remained on the back wall below a clue, imploring patients to cleanse their hands.

Another sign informed that lubrication was available upon request. Another non-functioning video hung from the wall.( I acquire it was non-functioning; I didnt want to touch anything more than I had to .) A stack of Hustler Magazines weresprawled and weathered on the table.

I closed the door. I anticipated.

I grew up with Internet porn, never even considering magazine porn. Its kind of like the path millennials consider newspapers: pointless, burdensome remnants. But here it was, my only option.

I wondered if it would even work.

It did. I started to climbing. Unexpectedly, my original believe, the one that stumbled me as I moved out the door earlier in the day, came again.

I was going to uncovered myself in public, and by that, I represent outside of the privacy rights of my own home.

There wouldnt be repercussions. There would not be police. There was nothing indecent about this revelation, and thats a very strange notion to wrap your heading around, specially when so much blood is hastening from it.

Young guys are studied from such a young age to obscure their boners. Its a proficiency in survival education that evolves as they age, and as the stakes rise. We know instinctively they are important, “they il be” fragile, “they il be” cherished and used.

Not long after we start sprouting, we are told our erections are rude, they are wrong, they are even felon, and we spend the next 50 years or so stuffing them up into our waistbands in suspicion of being ostracized.

Much of a young mans adolescence is an education in abridging his erectings, harnessing them in an attempt to protect himself. So to sit there without dismay genuinely was a trip.

I giggled aloud and wondered if anyone could sound. While Im here, I guessed, I might as well enjoy it, so I clanged off some puns in my head.

I thought.

I snickered.

It all became too much. I looked at my watch. Six minutes killed. Thats more than enough time wasted.

I sat down, breath and unzipped.

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