#thing absolutely did not help. but est left to keep doing the epic and he left tinnudir for awhile and she hasn't seen him since

[aurore-parle-de-ses-idees]

🖊️ for Est?

est :D

she needs to figure out that she's mostly just dps, and That's Fine, Actually. she can do a little healing (story wise anyway lol. when i go raiding she mostly heals), but she's not really good at it. she doesn't take naturally to it and she never really studied it either, and she tries to make up for that with stubbornness and nothing else, which doesn't always work out. she'll jump into healing when she's panicking sometimes- and sometimes it is admittedly necessary to go about things that way- and she'll go around offering it after a fight or something bc she feels like she's obligated to bc she can (and sometimes also bc it's pretty much the only thing she can do at all), but it's still very much not her Thing; a far cry from her storm affinity

some of her trying to like. fill every role at once was an offshoot of how much time she's spent just on her own, traveling and adventuring and, most recently, Being The PC lol. even when she works with other people for a bit, it hasn't often been long-term nor in groups where she can safely just let someone else handle it entirely

[red-dyed-sarumane]

what are some cool games u have played? dont matter if u mentioned before. tell me again tell me again :D

uhh hmm.

well okami is my all time favorite the art & the music & the message/story are all just incredible theres not a single time ive finished it i havent cried. i absolutely adore ryoshima coast ive spent so many hours just running around there to listen to music. which fun fact for u i only know about this game bc in about 6th grade i picked up okamiden bc i thought the little doggy was cute & was like fine i'll play as this boy if i get a cool dog and u cannot imagine how excited i was to find out u DID play as the little dog. i was SOOOOO obsessed literally my exact thoughts were 'if issun is ammy's celestial envoy then i am going to be chibis' i have a metric fuck ton of fan art i did at the time bc i thought it was quote "the epic-est game for ds ever" also cried every time i finished it. i was 13 so i didnt know what "being down bad" was but do know i was as obsessed with kurow as i was with d-ne later and now tenshi not a single irl friend was unaware i was in love with him. also fun fact for u bc at the same time i was also getting super into vocaloid i was so convinced my vocap name would end up as chibiP to the point i named myself that in pkmn x chibiP after chibiterasu of course. please enjoy my banger old art which is not even a fraction of my output

yume nikki is my next favorite game specifically the og that changed my brain chemistry as a kid. i adore that game so much its hard to put it into words. its just so unlike anything else. there is absolutely nothing in the game that can directly harm u theres no real health meter theres no way to die during the main play the absolute worst that will ever happen is u get stuck or woken up. in a horror game. which is already just amazing. and the whole horror aspect just plays on something i dont think is often done as well in many other things. ur alone. u wander and wander thru worlds that loop and connect and seemingly have nothing to do with each other. theres no dialogue; talking to npcs just gets u a noise or animation at best. ur entirely alone with just urself. its all dreams so u know everything is of madotsuki's own creation, another layer to the all u have is urself feeling. the art is just unusual i cant even say any of it on its own is in anyway scary. the whole thing shouldnt be scary and yet every time i start wandering in a world i cant help but feel unease. amazing 10/10 no other game will ever have what this gave me.

everyone knows i play pkmn the best is still pmd sky that also rewired my brain i still cant play it without crying.

its been a long time since i was really just playing it as the chapters released & got translated but 1bitheart is so so so important to me too. i dont kin for multiple reasons but if i did nanashi would be my first choice. like- without saying that to her i got my one irl friend to play once & when she saw how nanashi was she turned to me and went "this is just you" hes very important to me even now. absolutely loved the whole friendship sim & the story & its twists & the endings & their implications left me in shambles at 1 am on a school night. my fave charas are nanashi enri & saaya btw. i should replay this.

i also love the etrian odyssey series i love the character portraits (esp with the more recent games' color customization) i LOVE the dungeon art & i think all the monster designs are so cool. adore the whole make ur own map aspect keeps me so entertained to take a step & look around & chart all the walls & path ways. unfortunately i fucking suck at every single one i am not very good at strategy games so i end up stuck at or before the 3rd stratum. but thats okay its still fun to me.

the other one i'll talk about at length is spirit of the north another game i loved the art of. u play as a fox & get a partner spirit fox & i just love it SOOOO much. its also a game with 0 dialogue but theres A Lot going on it if u care to follow along & explore & dig into details & the game play is also pretty fun to me. this is the one game i started learning the speedrun btw thats also a very fun way to play it but ABSOLUTELY play it as intended first it has so much to offer

aaaand special mentions to omori, oneshot, witch's house, mermaid swamp, corpse party, & limbus company

[bellamyblake]

I dont wanna be mean but I Have been rewatching lately and I realized that Clarke's live is tragic it is but Bellamy's more Fucked up

in many ways i agree with this mostly because i’ve been thinking about it since he died a lot. 

and yes i do think clarke’s life is very tragic but what i do think also happened to her is that the SL itself punished her unnicessarily especially in the last season, in ways that...if you count all of eliza’s scenes, about 80% of them are her crying and it honestly got very very exhausting. even to watch. as good as she is and she is great, it gets repetitive. she sells it but you start wondering gd why?? you become indifferent at some point to it all.

that aside, i do agree because of a few major points.

bellamy’s never had a happy childhood. 

of course we don’t know what his life was like before O.ctavia was born. i like to think that maybe there was a glimpse of hope there. i think and hope too that bob wanted his filipino heritige respect though it never was but in my headcanon land he had a filipino dad who loved him dearly and who died tragically after which things went very wrong. but i believe he was loved dearly. 

yet canon and the writers i think tried to instill the idea that aurora slept with random men so neither his nor o’s father are known. however i do believe aurora must’ve loved him a lot when he was born and i think he was a mama’s boy before O was born and everything concentrated solely on her.

so yes, he’s had a very unhappy childhood. a childhood marked by mostly FEAR and that is no way for a child to live and whilst Clarke has had a tragic life we have seen her past and we know she had a family-a dad and a mom, a father who loved her dearly, she was clearly a dada’s girl, the apple of his eye, he understood her, they were connected, which is why she sees him so often in memories or when she is in situations where she almost *dies*. and as complicated as her relationship with her mother is, it’s clear abby’s love for her is very strong even if their relationship was strained by Jake’s passing.

so clarke had a family, she lived in Alpha where we know conditions were better and she was best friend with the chancellor’s son. i’d say up to the point where her father died things were probably pretty rosy.

meanwhile bellamy became a parent more or less at the age of seven. a child was placed in his hands in the way a mother passes a newborn to her husband, and he becomes responsible for a life that technically-

is not allowed to exist.

just let that whole part sink in cause that’s the tragedy of him.

he lived in absolute fear of the worst happening.  forced to become a guard so he could protect her, share rations with his forbidden sister so she could live and help his mother out.

then his worst fear happened.

because of HIMSELF!

the one moment he dared reach for happiness it was taken from him. and it killed his mom who he clearly loves very much and locked his sister who we know he loves beyond himself.

a year of absolutely lonliness, guilt-rideness and pain passes.

then he goes to earth and his sister who’s finally free decides to have a life of her own and split like every child does at some point, from her family. be free because she’s been locked up all her life and he’s left..confused?? doing irrational things, trying to control what he no longer can control.

trying to hold on to love.

because in all the pain and suffering he did have a family-his mom and his sister.

but now it’s gone.

then he grows to love and care for the 100. for clarke.

and he goes into a mountain to save them.

but instead ends up committing genocide.

meanwhile his sister runs off with a grounder (which...i have thoughts on o’s love life but i wont go there now).

and then he’s left alone by the one person he still had in his life. and let’s be real i love the blakes but they were never truly resolved. they came close to it in season 6 but it wasn’t truly done well. so i think it’s fair to say that from the moment he touches the ground, even though he does it for his sister-

he loses her.

and he only has clarke left.

but clarke leaves.

so he’s loveless, empty, broken and absolutely destroyed by the fact that he killed a mountain full of people some of whom were good and tried to save them.

he’s destroyed inside.

and then on and on-the pike manipulation, the massacre, more guilt, more pain. the death wave and a weightless loseless fight that bears no meaning but he tries he tries he goddamn tries

though he doesn’t know why, surely not for himself. for O? for clarke? for the others? for his people?

what is there left for him to do.

aurora blake raised no suiciders. no losers. he can’t kill himself as much as death seems alluring.

what i find the saddest is that he has no real love in his life. yes he has clarke and yes we know they were written as romantic but it was never canon canon so he doesn’t have this great epic love story that all the other characters have-clarke with L, o with Lincoln, raven with f/nn, jasper with maya, monty with harper, lastly john with emori which i think was the best written one.

and that is the tragedy indeed. 

because he IS the character who is the MOST heart even at his *head*-est and yet he is denied love. he’s denied a great love story (again bellarke-aside here). he is DENIED his heart being loved the way it loves, he is denied the gentleness of a soft, kind, filled with extremes-ups and downs, or even challenges, love.

he’s denied it.

the heart is denied love.

i don’t count e/cho. im sorry but that just as clarke killing him was done purely out of spite. there was no real love there, no emotion, no romance. it was a time jump relationship just like his one with gina. he’s REFUSED a great love story. 

he has it with clarke. but he’s denied actually going there too. 

i find it sad because love spills out of him in waves, all of himself he gives out, all of his softness kindness, even his flaws, he lets out in the open and says this is me, i am not ashamed of myself. i may hate myself but i love. 

and there’s no one to love him back.

and then in the end of course im saddest because we’ve seen the craziest shit on earth and he’s still denied understanding from his friends. but i wont go there because it hurts too much.

so yes clarke lost a lot. she lost L and she lost madi in a way and she lost her dad and her mom. but she’s had happiness in her life, she’s had a family, she’s had great love, she’s even had the cutesy teenage drama romance with f/nn and then a good love and then yes death and pain. she is separated from her friends, she is punished unnecessarily like he is too.

but she’s known it.

and she’s known the peace from those 6 years on earth. peace he craved and strived towards in the end. she’s had that with madi. whilst he’s spent that punishing himself over leaving her behind and once again trying to keep their people together in her abscence to honor her.

i’m sure he’s had happy moments. maybe glimpses. like bob said, glimpses of peace. maybe he’s had glimpses of happiness too. when he was baby boy and his mom picked him from his crib or his dad carried him arround or when he carried O around and talked to her. or when he was hugged by clarke.

but he should’ve had more. 

he deserved more. 

[ruined-rp]

Hello Luna and welcome to New Orleans, the city of The Damned. Thank you so much for applying, you have been successful for the role of Elena Gilbert. Welcome to the family, but for now it’s time to get down to business…

Head on over to the New Member Checklist, careful not to go down any dark alleys, it’s not safe here.

OUT OF CHARACTER:

Name: Luna

Pronouns: She/Her

Age: 22

Timezone/Country: EST/USA

Triggers: RFP

Activity Level: 8 I would count my activity level at a high 8 because I am currently on my summer break and classes do not begin for me until late August. Even though I know I would be able to continue my activity because I am not currently taking a job between classes this semester. I’ve been a rp’er for around +11 years now so I have a pretty good handle on how to balance RP and IRL.

How Did You Hear About Us: I was just searching through the TVD RP + TO RP tags and found an ad for this RPG. I really liked the layout and the combo of three big tv shows. I’ve never been in a RPG where it also featured TW RP and wanted to try it.

Anything Else?: I’m excited to start writing if I’m accepted!

DESIRED CHARACTER:

Desired Character: Elena Gilbert

Why This Character?: I chose to RP as Elena because I always admired her spunk and dedication to her family. I adored watching through the series, through the smiles and tears and frustrating character twists. She’s so human. So naive and young and unsure in a world where someone could kill her in a blink. She takes it head on for her friends, for her brother, and in the memory of the parents she lost. And even the changes she goes through, i.e. turning into a vampire, she learns to live with the best of it and work on the worst of it.

Any FC Changes?: Nope!

Ships/Anti-ships: Here’s the age old question: Stelena or Delena? I’d definitely say throughout the series I was 80% Stelena shipper. During certain points I began to find myself leaning towards Delena a bit more, but that was very much towards the end. Each ship had their ups and downs but I’ll always love that ‘epic love’ the two had. When it comes to a character that isn’t named Salvatore, Elena would definitely fall for the kindhearted do gooder. She wants and needs more light in her world so someone who can be a positive influence would definitely be the path she walks down.

Headcanons: W: There was a time that simply writing the letter W felt like it knocked the air out of Elena’s chest. W, w, w. ‘Say it,’ she’d force herself. ‘Wickery Bridge.’ A girl who lived and breathed every moment of her life in her journal was defeated by the letter W. It began a word that never meant anything more than a way in and out of town, but now was like a brand on her heart. There were pages of just the letter following the crash and funeral. W.. W.. Wick. No, scratched out. Slowly but surely, the word Wickery Bridge was written down. “My parents died on Wickery Bridge.” BREAKUP: Following the days Elena broke up with her high school sweetheart, Love Song by Sara Bareilles played on the radio nonstop. At first, it absolutely annoyed her. How upbeat it was while she was nothing but bummed out. Every station played it eventually, she couldn’t run and walking was getting annoying when she had to carry so much biology homework home. Eventually, she gave in one night on the way home from cheer practice and gave the song a listen. She thought about seeing her ex-sweetheart on the field catching passes while Caroline barked out orders in her peppy voice. After awhile she stopped changing it. Fingers slowly started tapping on the wheel, her head followed suit. Humming turned into full blown rocking out with her hair going everywhere and a huge smile on her face. One night her and Bonnie were dancing and singing in Elena’s car when she took the next line. “I’m not gonna write you to stay. If your heart is nowhere in it, I don’t want it for a minute!” Unfortunately, he and some friends were walking to their cars. Ouch. ICE CREAM: As little girls, Caroline coordinated the flavors the three of them would eat. Strawberry for Bonnie, Vanilla for Caroline, and Chocolate for Elena. The three would have Neapolitan ice cream for every single birthday from ages 5 to 15. Luckily, it was their favorites already but Caroline liked to take the credit for it. In secret though, Elena would get a mint chocolate chip. She never got it in front of the other girls, not even wanting the smallest little thing to disappoint Caroline and their familiar dynamic.

Please Provide At Least One: Moodboard & Playlist

CHARACTER QUESTIONNAIRE:

How Does Your Character Feel About The Peace Treaty?: Elena is entirely for the treaty. Her life has been thrown upside down ever since she found out that those she loves most are Supernatural; Bonnie and Caroline, Witch and Vampire, respectively. If there are rules set in place, that she may or may not be very naive about, she believes it can help protect them. She also thinks it might help her friends in more ways than just protecting them. Perhaps it will help them with control and staying out of bad situations brought on by their new nature.

Slice of Life: ‘Dear Diary..’ Elena’s day must always start with a journal entry unless she’s overslept and is running late to classes at NOU. She always sits to the left of Bonnie with Caroline on the right in class, listening to what gossip Caroline has at the time trickle down to her. Pay attention, absorb information, hold back the occasional giggle as Bonnie makes a comment at their professors horrible toupee. Elena always makes sure to enjoy every laugh, breath, smile given and received. Life is difference once you’ve lost people, you appreciate it more. And she very much appreciates the mundane even more now that it’s less and less prevalent in her life. Following classes is a bit of relaxing in the grass on campus, either alone or with her two best friends as usual. Work comes at night in the form of a waitress at Rousseau’s, walking there with fellow employee Cami O’Connell. She helps keep the weird ones at bay while Elena gets her footing there. She tries with all her might to close her eyes and picture the Grill back in Mystic Falls but she knows there’s far worse here than just the regular drinkers back in Virginia.  

What is Your Character’s Greatest Fear? How Does This Affect Your Character?: What’s a greatest fear that’s already come true? The life of Elena Gilbert. Fear never goes away– it grows, transforms. First it was her parents, extensions of her heart ripped away. That was a living nightmare. Once grieving packed up and left ( or does it? do we ever stop grieving or does it go away for awhile? ) she latched onto the last extension of her heart, Jeremy. She began to have nightmares of losing him as well, wishing more than nothing to crawl into bed and hold her little brother tight and never let go. Elena often wonders if this is what it’s like to be a parent, often seeing Jeremy as a mixture of her little brother and someone who she needs to protect and take care of as a parent would do. Thus, her new greatest fear is losing him. But just beneath the surface, just barely hiding, is a fear that is so buried it’s almost forgotten about. Almost. Elena fears losing herself along the way. Who will care for Jeremy? Who will take care of Caroline while she’s transitioning and adjusting? Who will bring Bonnie down to earth when she gets too carried away with spells? She anchors herself to who she is by holding onto those around her so tightly that she might be suffocating them as well.

SAMPLE: RFP