#this is a monster and i need to upload it to ao3 soon because wow

[justsmilestuffhappens]

7 Free day [Songs]

F!ve Christmasses

<*buckle up*>

A Christmas that never was

A - Another Christmas, Another empty house, Another reason,There is no Santa Claus, May all your Christmasses be white,Though mine are blue, It's just another Christmas without you

Buck took another swig from his glass that matched his eyes. Not that he could notice that with how watery they were now.

Who was he to ask them to stay though?

The music station he'd landed on was ironically perfect for how he felt but horrible at the same time.

What was he supposed to have told them even if he did? 'Take me with you'?

Buck looked at a picture of Christopher and Eddie from when they went to the zoo together a while back.

A ding interrupted the song as he saw Eddie had sent a message to everyone. It was a picture of Christopher smiling on his back holding a snowball. How cute?

A drop of water fell upon his screen and for a second Buck thought it was his A.C. until he realized no it was him.

Where did the empty hole in his chest come from?

It was just another couple of days then things would go back to normal. Right?

Maddie and Chimney were on their honeymoon. Hen and Karen had their new child who was warming to them and Denny. Bobby and Athena had May back with them and Harry and were celebrating Michael's recovery.

When would he finally be able to do something about his feeling?

Buck took the bottle and before he could have a second thought downed the half that was left, straight into the sink. He wouldn't put Bobby through seeing him like this, had to stop it now before. Just before.

He grabbed some water and began his trek up the stairs letting the darkness claim the lower floor.

Sip after slow sip Buck got his eye's clearer. He sent a "hope you're having fun, give my little bud a hug for me please" before silencing his phone.

Feeling emotional drained even when he'd done was nothing but sit around and cry for a bit Buck settled into bed. His comforter welcomed him not like a warm hug but as a hollow one.

12:01 am. The clock read. "Merry Christmas." He whispered to no one.

In the morning he'd be fine. He'd shower get to work and go to the party he'd been invited to later. Alone.

But for now he just needed to sleep. To forget about how miserable he felt for a couple of hours.

It wasn't anyone's fault.

Why did they have to leave?

He missed them so much. Did they miss him too? He wished they'd come back as his thoughts drifted into sleep.

A Christmas that was meant to be

β - Feeling Christmas all around, And I'm trying to play it cool, but it's hard to focus when I see you walking around the room, let it snow, it's blasting now, but I won't get in the mood, I'm avoiding every mistletoe until in know, it's true love that he thinks of, so next Christmas, I'm not all alone, boy

"Where did all the mistletoe go?" Chimney asked Hen as they walked upstairs.

Buck was sitting with Eddie. This two day Christmas was looking to be a dull one.

No very close or exciting calls but they weren't complaining on this Christmas eve. They'd be home for a bit tomorrow but back in later on in the day.

"Yeah. I noticed that too. Did Bobby tell you anything about it?" Eddie asked looking back at Buck.

"Huh? No. Maybe we lost a few last year or they were getting old and falling apart." Buck shrugged while sipping some hot chocolate Bobby made earlier.

They wouldn't find where Buck had stashed them. Well not till after Boxing day and it'd be too late by then. No kiss grenades this holiday season.

Eddie got up to get himself a cup as Buck's eyes never left him. Hen and Chim may have seen him but they didn't say anything though however painful it was to watch.

"So buck, you coming with Maddie and me for Christmas or ya got other plans?" Chim asked from hiding his hand of cards from Hen.

"Yeah. Probably party hop. Think Eddie's gonna have his abuela over and said I was welcome to swing by. How 'bout y'all Hen?"

"We're going to Athena's to drop off some gifts and visit for a bit then it's a movie marathon while watching Denny play with the new stuff he gets this year."

Eddie came back to sit by Buck taking a good warm gulp.

"Mhm. It's no Abuela hot chocolate but Bobby made it pretty good." He hummed sitting closer as they watched a rerun on t.v..

The alarm blared as Bobby came out of his office.

"Snow machine buried a guy who was drunk on the job. We're closest, let's go."

Buck didn't plan for the others finding the mistletoe hidden under spare heat blankets in the storeroom when they got back.

"Weren't you the last one on cleanup duty?" Hen said looking at him from over the box.

"Oh! That's where they were. I must have came to get something and forgot. Good thing too with all the cold and flu going around really." Buck looked anywhere but at the team as Bobby took the box and placed it in his arms.

"Well it's a good thing we found them before Christmas was over huh? Why don't you go finishing hanging them like I told you to before and I'll get started on dinner." His words left no room for protest even if buck never would anyways.

When he was done putting up the box Eddie laughed at him. "What's so funny?" Buck had to ask.

"This your way of telling people to kiss your ass?" Eddie asked pointing behind Buck.

He felt the mistletoe he'd forgotten in his back pocket. "No. I'm just distracted I guess" buck shook his head.

"You feeling okay?" Eddie asked coming over to feel his forehead.

"Don't dad me. I won't hear the end of it from Bobby." He joked.

"Can't wait to be off so we can relax with mi Abuela and Christopher tomorrow man."

"Well we've only got a couple hours. With any luck we'll be out before the next big call."

As fate would have it buck jinxed them with a house fire from someone deep frying their turkey in the middle of their dinner at the firehouse."I'm sorry." Buck said as they were on their way.

"Not your fault the universe likes picking the worst time Buck." With the fire out they were able to go home.

Buck went to his and picked up some clothes before going to spend the night at Eddie's to Chris's surprise. It was a good Christmas.

"Mistletoe Buck" Christopher shouted as he came back with popcorn before they opened a gift at midnight.

Buck froze as Eddie kissed his cheek then continued into the living room.

He winked at buck but before he could ask they were fully into opening all their gifts except the ones that Abuela would be bringing over. Buck had to ask him later if that was a one time thing.

A Christmas that almost wasn't

− · − ·  / I'll find my way back home, And light up every tree, We will hang our stockings for you and one for me, 'Cause Santa called me to make sure I'm prepared, He said "Pack your bags and tell them You'll be there",

Buck could put up with anything for them, he would put up with everything for them. Once he was done he'd be coming home.

His dad's passing right now was like one final act of spite against them. Buck didn't care about their inheritance, or the house, or the cars. But responsibility fell on him with mom gone and Maddie in her current state.

At least one of them had to come and with Maddie pregnant he'd bit the bullet. He always would.

Their dad wasn't some monster, more so a ghost before he was even dead. Buck barely remembered much of the time they spent together.

He'd been here since the beginning of December. One week became two and a half and he was getting desperate. With the funeral already long passed and only the house left he was glad they'd been understanding of Maddie skyping for the reading the will.

It was lucky someone already wanted the house and the cars weren't something he'd wanted buck to have anyways.

Now all he had to do was get to the airport for the first flight from Hershey to Los Angeles.

A snowstorm chose two days before Christmas to stop Buck's in his tracks. He stayed at the airport praying that he'd make it home but doubtful with what the news said.

He eyed one of the cleaning staff messing with a Christmas tree as he was throwing away his water.

"Come on. Please. Why do you do this every year?" The young guy had muttered as he tried turning it on again.

"Need some help?" Buck asked coming over.

"No. Sorry sir. The tree's just being finicky." He checked the plugs but it wasn't working.

"Have you seen if any of the bulbs are loose?" Buck asked whilst looking at it.

"What?!"

"If people touch it while walking by they could have messed up a bulb. All it takes is one sometimes to mess up a whole string of lights."

Buck helped him look as within a minute bits were back alight. "Holy shit. Sorry I didn't mean to say that. You know your stuff mister."

Buck laughed. He couldn't be more than a couple years older than this guy.

"Yeah. We used to have people decorate our house a lot. You pick up on things even if it's just watching people work." With that Buck moved back to his seat.

He looked at his phone to see a new message. It was a picture of Christopher standing next to a hanging shelf on the wall where their stockings were. His was on the other side of Chris's opposite Eddie.

"We miss you. Can't wait for you to get back. Christopher says to make sure to tell you we love you." Buck reads as he holds his phone closer to his chest as if it's the last source of warmth in a frozen land.

"Just my luck. Snowstorm. I'll tell you as soon as we're about to leave. I'm coming back, one way or another."

Buck fell asleep somehow in those chairs after securing his bag and phone.

He woke to a person dressed as Santa shaking his shoulder. "What?" He said groggy.

"Shh." They covered their lips and beckoned Buck to follow. Buck's body was on autopilot as he followed.

Santa silently pointing at a single present under the tree. Buck hesitated to pick it up and read his name.

As Santa urged him to open it with a wave of his hand, Buck did so.

It was a little ceramic firefighter figurine that looked like him. The kind you put in a little village on a table.

Buck looked up from his hand but Santa was gone. The next thing he noticed was waking up to people talking.

"Flight 811 now boarding." Buck jumped up too quickly as he moved to get in line. With the snowstorm subsiding even for a while he hoped they'd make it out.

He felt around for the figurine but it wasn't anywhere as he looked to where he was seated.

After texting Eddie that he'd had the weirdest dream but he had to turn off his phone soon for the flight the plane took off.

Buck made it home for Christmas eve with a few hours left to spare.

He got to the house just before 11 to Eddie already opening the door pulling him inside for a kiss.

"God I missed you."

"I missed you too. Both of you."

"Christopher's asleep. Take a shower and let's sleep. He's gonna love seeing you in the morning Buck." Eddie brought his bag over to their room as Buck hopped in the shower.

Buck was already asleep in the bed once he'd dried off in only his towel.

Eddie shook his head getting boxer briefs on him so Christopher wouldn't be seeing him naked in the morning. In their rush he couldn't ask Buck about his dream but it didn't sound bad so it could wait.

Christopher was shaking buck awake shouting you're finally back it's Christmas it's Christmas buck! It was the best way to wake up.

"Presents!" Christopher said only for Eddie to correct him.

"Breakfast first?" He said.

"Breakfast can wait. I want to see Christopher open my gift. How about only one then a breakfast break. I'll start it while you and your dad pick one each." Buck suggested kissing both of them as he got up to start.

Christopher opened a new video game as Eddie picked a dress shirt wrapped around a new thermos. Buck was given a present as he placed the food on the table. Inside was a new wallet with a gift card for one of their favorite restaurants in it.

After they quickly finished their eggs Buck went to check his stocking and froze when he looked down at the same figurine from his dream.

"Hmm. That's cute. Hey look Christopher we got our own too." Eddie said beside buck pulling their stockings to spill them out.

"I had a dream about this?"

"Your psychic?" Eddie joked.

"I dreamed Santa gave me this at the airport but I lost it." Buck said still staring at it with wonder.

"Santa brought you back just like I asked him Buck."Christopher said hugging him.

"Aww. You know I'd come back Christopher. Even if it was late I'd come back for you two." Buck said looking up at Eddie.

A knock at the door had Eddie moving to let their guests in.

A Christmas that could be

Д - singing to the deer in the sky, singing as they jingle, jingle, jingle tonight, singing to the moon, set it free, you're the angel on the top of my tree, singing to the spirit above, sing your heart out with all of your love, Santa's coming for us,

Eddie watched as the Christmas lights danced on Buck's face while they wheeled into the park set up.

"So a Santa Claus went dark side and now we've got a Krampus slasher on the loose?" Buck asked Cap while they drew closer to the crowd.

"No. The police have a very naughty Santa. We've got a stabbing victim and some decorations that have become a hazard so we need to clear them as much we can to prevent more injuries." Bobby said coming to a stop with the mess in view. Chimney and Hen pulled up beside them as they hopped out.

Eddie saw why there was a problem with finding the Santa it was like a mini convention. It unsettled him that whoever it was could possibly get away with it.

Hen was treating the stabbing victim while Chimney looked to see if any other bystanders were hurt.

"Buck, Eddie, we're getting this metal reindeer off her. Ma'am stay still until its completely off and we have you looked at. It doesn't seem you were cut too bad but you should still let us treat you. 1. 2. 3." Bobby ordered as they lifted the heavy lawn ornament.

"I'm fine that fucking reindeer isn't gonna kill me."

"I'm glad to hear you're still in high spirits miss but please let us have a look at you."

Chimney came over to check her after putting a neck brace.

"So these things were stacked?" Eddie asked as he and Buck moved the deer away from it being in the way or people touching it.

"Has to be some funky welding sculpture. Must have broken off when they bumped it too hard while evil Santa ran for it." Buck surmised.

"Alright! Santa's who have given statements and shown I.D. you are free to go. If you have any information on the assailant please call the department." Athena shouted before she came over.

"Hi Athena. Did they give a disruption." Bobby asked as she hugged him before pulling away.

"Caucasian male, thirty to forty but he'd got a forearm tattoo of a rabbit and a birthmark on his neck so that's something." Athena gestured.

"Hopefully y'all find him before he hurts someone else." Buck said.

"You know it. Strangest thing is no one in the crowd saw where he ran to. They were too shocked trying to help the victim which while making it harder is worth it since one of them was pre-med and helped as much as they could."

Buck moved with Eddie to try getting more of the heavy decorations further from the walking path that they'd been shoved into.

After they pushed the original reindeer sculpture and some other large decorations Buck heard Eddie before he felt himself being punched in the back of his head. "Ow! What the fuck?"

In the next few seconds things moved too fast. Buck whirled around to defend himself.

Eddie ran back closer from where he'd been going to regroup waiting for buck to catch up.

The anti Santa was suddenly there and pissed off. Buck got a good right hook in before there was suddenly blood.

Everyone froze or at least buck did as he took in what he saw. Eddie was finally over and checking buck before turning to the bad Santa.

A metal angel tree topper had fallen and lodged into his arm with its trumpet?

"Don't pull it out! You need to get to a hospital then you're under arrest." Eddie told him while his anger seemed to deflate.

Buck looked past Eddie's shielding him with his body while rubbing his head.

"You're under arrest. We're gonna get you treated and booked sir." Athena said coming over as the Santa gave up.

With him in cuffs and his arm wrapped until he'd gets to the hospital in a second ambulance things were finally calm again.

"Buck keep the ice. Chimney says you don't have a concussion but you feel the slightest bit bad I expect to be told." Bobby said while they packed up what little gear they used.

"Hey Eddie. Santa Claus is coming to Ow!" Buck said inside the truck earning a shake of Eddie's head while Bobby radioed that was a strike for Buck having a concussion earning a groan of I can't make bad jokes?

Eddie wanted to hit him for joking but that would contradict his desire of wanting to see buck hurt. "He was in the box. Guy must be a contortionist." Eddie told buck which only earned a shocked gasp from buck and a quiet no way.

Once they were back in the station he was watching Buck like a hawk along with Bobby as they waited for Hen and Chim.

"You know the last time someone looked at me that hard we had sex" buck joked trying to lighten the mood.

"Like you could handle me, especially right now." Eddie scoffed.

"I don't have a concussion! And I can handle a lot of things, you'd be surprised. Haven't gotten any complaints yet." Buck puffed his chest and wiggled an eyebrow.

"I'm not looking for a one night stand though buck." Eddie regretted how that sounded.

"Who said it's gotta be one. I may not be buck 1.0 but I've got his experience. Just don't go for random hookups anymore." Buck came over.

"Are you just asking me out because you got hit in the head?" Eddie turned to look buck in the eye.

"Maybe that punch was the kick in my ass i needed to finally ask you what I've been too scared to."

"Ask me later, after you're all good. If you still feel like it."

"I will. I'll ask you a million times if I have to. I'm serious. I've been thinking about us for a while I just didn't want to risk anything"

"Good. I look forward to you asking me out at the Christmas party Bobby's hosting with Athena."

With that they went back to sitting around waiting for the next call. Hen and chimney joined as Bobby finished their late lunch.

Buck wasn't lying. He'd ask Eddie again tomorrow and have Hen say he didn't have a concussion too.

But for now he was content to sit here together. At least it was out in the open now and there was hope.

How Christmas should be

5 - I found, what I was looking for, a love that's meant for me, a heart that's mine completely, knocked me right off my feet, and this year I will fall, with no worries at all, 'Cause you are near and everything's clear, you're all I need, underneath the tree

Buck felt electrified like a living Christmas light. Today was the day he'd finally put it out there. He thought Eddie felt something too and it felt right.

Once they were off he'd confess that he'd slowly been falling deeper and deeper in love with his best friend. He had to find out if they could be more.

Their shift had been long with only one major call of kids breaking a fire hydrant and causing havoc with multiple injuries but not too bad that anyone would need to be hospitalized.

As buck was getting ready for the shift to end and to tell Eddie about them the alarm blared.

The shift in temperature had caused the ground to unsettle and a couple to slide off a cliff.

They'd gotten the first woman up but her girlfriend was further down.

Buck repelled lower to get her as Eddie was set to descend with the other girl safe above now.

Buck got a harness on her and they began pulling her up along side him when a large rock fell towards them.

Before buck could think of anything else he moved to shield her and took a hit to his helmet.

Eddie screamed his name as they continued to pull her up.

Buck looked to be okay as he followed behind her being taken into Eddie's guidance.

Once they were topside Eddie was asking if buck was okay while Bobby and hen took the other girl.

"I'm fine dude. My helmet took the most of-"

Before buck could finish he was tumbling. He didn't know if it was his adrenaline leaving him or his injury finally feeling so painful but he felt as Eddie got him before he could full hit the ground.

With his helmet off they could see the lump forming.

"Damn it. Thank God you're off the blood thinners finally." He couldn't tell who said it but guessed it was Eddie.

"We'll take him in ourselves. Hen, the girls are good right?" Bobby said as they moved him over to the ambo.

"They only had a few minor scrapes. Chim and I got him. You two can follow." They were at the hospital in a blur. So much for today being the day. His plan was ruined.

"It's just a mild concussion. You'll be fine. Stay with us Buck" chimney said besides him on the way.

"It's ruined."

"What's ruined?"

"I was gonna tell Eddie"

"Tell him what? You've still got time, "

"That I-"

"Buck. BUCK open your eyes! buck buddy no, stay awake man."

He woke to Maddie sitting next to him on her phone as the tv was quiet.

"Good. You're awake." She said looking over. "You gave us a little scare."

"What time is it?"

"It's 10 thirty. You've been in here for a good two hours. Doctor says you'll be fine but don't want you pushing yourself too soon."

"I'm ruining Christmas"

"No. Christmas is fine. You might be out if your next results are good. Even if you did have to stay here, it's not a problem for us to visit you here or wait a couple days for you to get out." Maddie put a comforting hand on him.

"Is Eddie okay?"

"Why wouldn't he be? He's safe at home with Christopher. Its a little late to visit but if we're still here he said he'd stop by tomorrow. You aren't in pain and you're talking fine. Hopefully those are good enough signs towards you getting out."

The doctor explained more. Buck could leave now but they would suggest he stay. However if he's careful and being watched by others she felt he would be fine.

With Buck signed out Maddie and him got to her place where Chimney was waiting with a late dinner. "Dude I'm starving." Buck said smelling the food.

"You're always hungry Buck. Figures with how big you are your body needs the extra energy" chimney said as buck looked over to see his bag and gifts from his place in the living room.

"I got your stuff from work then wrung by yours after. You'll get to do what you said tomorrow after you rest." Chimney said knowing smirk on his face.

"What did buck say earlier?"

"Nothing mads."

"That he-"

"I had a concussion! Wasn't I a patient? Isn't this a breach of trust or something?"

"He might have said he needed to tell Eddie something." Chimney said earning an exaggerated face.

"Is that why you asked if he was okay at the hospital?"

"There's no breach of trust if you brought it up to her buck. And from what we've seen, concussion or not you two are obvious to everyone but yourselves."

"You really do have a boy crush."

"Stop calling it that. Sure Eddie's attractive, and. I may like him more than a friend should." Buck quieted at the end.

"Don't tell him this but I've caught him checking you out before." Chimney said.

"What?"

"Maybe it's not so one sided Buck. Just talk to him." Maddie looked at him with understand.

After that awkward but supportive dinner and some good sleep they were up and ready for the get together with the others.

Everyone promised to open their gifts together before some of them had duty later in the day.

Buck took a gulp of eggnog as he waited for a chance to talk to Eddie face to face.

He came in with Christopher and they helped get the gifts from Eddie's truck.

Once the kids were gleefully playing with their newest toys buck took the chance.

"Can I talk to you outside for a second?"

"Sure buck. Let me get my jacket."

So they took to the front as the kids were in the back and in Harry's room.

"Yesterday I was planning to tell you something important."

"Hen might have told me."

"What?"

"She just said we needed to talk. You said so in the ambulance before we had to leave you to finish our shift then it was too late to take Christopher for only a half hour before he needed to be in bed."

"Yeah. That's okay. It would have been nice but I still got to see him and give him my gift today." Buck said. "But about that. I know we're friends. I know I might come off as straight but I-."

"You're not the only one."

Buck continued on needed to get this out before realizing what Eddie said.

"I've been into guys before, I just haven't been into many, not as quickly as I was into you. I want that for us. I know that it might be hard but I feel like we could have something."

"I think. No. I know I'm in love with you. I'm willing to try this but I don't want to lose you." Eddie said pulling buck closer.

"You won't. I'll always be here. Its where I want to be with you. I love you two, both of you."

"We need to talk about other things. I have to tell you stuff you deserve to know and the truth."

"I'm here. Whenever you're ready. Now or tomorrow but soon if it's important. As long as we're in this together we've got as much time as you need."

Buck finally did something he'd been thinking about doing for a while. He kissed Eddie the way he wanted. The way he deserved to be kissed. They stayed there with their foreheads connected breathing as the cold air blew.

"I can't believe they knew about us wanting this." Buck admitted still holding Eddie thinking about going back in.

"I can. We see the others every day and if I look back it's been like this for a while. I felt like this."

"Let's go inside. The kids are probably already back in. I want to play with Chris's new jeep. He said he loved it because it looks like mine."

Eddie grabbed Buck's hand and led him in. They were joined at the hip like usual the rest of the afternoon. Christopher was as happy as could be and they were too.

Buck felt like this was what he'd been looking for for so long. They'd work together to make this relationship last. He was in it and he knew Eddie was too. "You feeling good Buck?" Athena asked sitting next to him.

"Better than I've ever been." Buck told her with a smile and he meant it. "Merry Christmas Athena"

"Merry Christmas Buck." She hugged him as Christopher came over with his new drone.

"Cool bud. But you know your not supposed to play with it in doors right?"

"I know buck. Thank you for the jeep."

"Sure thing superman." Buck scooted over for Christopher to sit between Eddie and him. He felt warmth fill him as Eddie and him listened to what Harry and Denny showed Christopher and played with him earlier.

[skywardsoul]

Stories From the Sidelines: Chapter 2

Yeah believe it or not, I actually uploaded a second chapter to my Little Witch Academia fic that focuses on the background characters. Sure it’s almost been two years since chapter 1, better late than never right! Chapter 2 stars Sarah’s teammate Chloé and her one sided rivalry with Diana.

Read it on AO3: Here

Read it on FF.Net: Here

Unknown to most of its student body, there was a war raging in the halls of Luna Nova. A war being fought for honor, integrity, and the truth. The young witches that blissfully walked the campus may have been unaware of its importance, but for Chloé LeBlanc, it was her reality. The day would come when she would conquer this fight, when she would finally show her peers the truth! The day when she would prove to everyone, student and teacher alike, that she was a better witch than Diana Cavendish.

For the life of her Chloé could never understand just what everyone saw in Diana. She swore that she couldn’t go ten minutes without one of her brainwashed peers throwing out a “Wow Diana!,” or a “You’re so talented Diana!” So what she was good at a couple of spells? It’s not like she could pull off anything their teachers couldn’t! So what she was from a fancy noble family! As far as Chloé could tell there were several girls in her year with noble blood. Hell Chloé herself was from a long and historic magical lineage. The difference was she didn’t feel the need to flaunt it around like Diana did.

Every other word outta that snobbish brit’s mouth was about her dumb family. “The Cavendish family honor,” this and “My duty as a Cavendish,” that. And yet no one but her seemed to care. All the other girls, especially Barbra Parker and Hannah England, ate up that crap like it was a freaking ice cream sundae. They just loved to hear all about Diana’s dumb family history and her dumb realtives, and her dumb ancestorial connection to one of the olde nine witches. And Woodward knows that Diana was all too eager to tell them about it.

The LeBlanc family was just as storied and important as the Cavendish lineage, yet no one seemed to be chomping at the bit to ask Chloé about her history. For generations, witches of the LeBlanc name were crucial parts of the magical community. Her great great grandmother Belle was one of the founding members of the great mages library. Her great uncle Auguste revolutionized the magical culinary arts with his cooking. Even as recently as 16 years ago, her cousin Jean-Pierre helped to stop a dangerous drug trading coven. There was no shortage of excellent LeBlanc witches! Okay, yeah sure, her older sister Sherry might have gotten a bit too obsessed with that crazy motorcycle card game of hers, but that's hardly enough to erase the decades of impressive LeBlanc achievement. Didn’t seem to matter though, as these noble deeds meant nothing to the masses compared to Diana’s rambling.

The only other people who seemed to be immune to Diana’s annoying drivel was her teammate Sarah Bernhardt, and Sucy Manbavaran and Akko Kagari of the red team. Sarah was too much of a realist to get caught up in pointless hero worship, Chloé was pretty sure Sucy didn’t really care about anything, and Akko, poor, sweet, troublesome Akko, had convinced herself that Diana was her destined rival. A rivalry that the Japanese witch stood absolutely no chance in, but one that Chloé admired. Sure, She and Akko didn’t talk much, but Chloé saw her as a companion of sorts. The only other girl who was dying to see Diana get knocked down a peg.

And finally, after all this time, Chloé had found a way to make just that happen. A full proof plan that would once and for all prove herself to be a witch of equal, no, greater calibur than Diana Cavendish. Chloé grinned wickedly at the envelope she clutched to her chest. With her master piece in mind and her secret weapon in hand, Chloé proudly strode towards the peach team dorm. The last classes had just let out for the day, and the French girl was certain that both her teammates would already be back in their dorm. Not that she was eager to brag about her master plan or anything, Chloé just felt like talking to her friends was all. As she approached the door, Chloé’s suspicions were confirmed as she heard Sarah and Elfriede’s voices from within the room. With a confident smile on her face, Chloé threw open the door, just knowing her fellow peach team witches would be eager to listen to her magnum opus.

“I’m telling you El, that’s absolute nonsense,” Sarah said as she lay on her bed, looking up at the ceiling.

An annoyed grumble came from Elfriede who was sitting across the room on the bottom bunk of the bed she shared with Chloé.

“Oh what would you know about true love? Always looking at matters of the heart in black and white,” Elfriede retorted. The German witch had a book open on her lap. While Chloé couldn’t see the title from where she stood, she was certain it was probably another one of Elfriede’s trashy monster romance novels.

It was a sight that Chloé had gotten rather used to in her time at Luna Nova, as her teammates seemed to argue constantly like this. Elfriede would dream up some cheesy idealistic scene of love and confession and drama in her head, only to adamantly defend it when Sarah would ruthlessly point out how absurd it was. The arguments would never get mean spirited and they hardly ended in the two peach team members being genuinely upset with one another, but they did more often than not go on for a long time. Neither Elfriede nor Sarah was the backing down type, and as a result were more willing to waste an afternoon then admit they were being silly.

The fact that the two were in the midst of one such argument did not bode well for Chloé as neither had noticed her come in the door, and even worse, neither would be willing to hear about her awesome plan.

“All I’m saying is that true love is an unproven concept,” Sarah said, turning on her side to face Elfriede. “But you know what is a proven one?”

“What’s that?”

“Hunger. As soon as that lamia gets hungry, it doesn’t matter how ‘perfect for each other,’ they are. Goodbye lover boy or girl, you’re fucking dinner!” Sarah said, throwing up her hands for emphasis.

“Sarah!” Elfriede said with a huff. “You’re so morbid!”

“What? It’s the truth!”

“Ehem,” Chloé said with a cough, figuring now was as good a time as any to make her presence known.

Sarah and Elfriede both fell silent as they turned to look at Chloé.

“Oh hey Chloé,” Sarah said. “Didn’t see you come in. How long have you been standing there?”

Chloé walked forward and sat down at the desk the three shared.

“Long enough to know that you should cease this pointless argument before it becomes a whole ‘thing’,” She said with an air of authority. “And long enough to know that a certain team leader owe’s a coin to the swear jar.”

Sarah rolled her eyes and with a groan flopped onto her back.

“Seriously? I Didn’t even mean to! It just kinda slipped out.”

“Yes seriously,” Chloé said, grabbing the jar from its place on the desk and thrusting it towards Sarah.

The redhead grumbled under her breath as she sat up and dug for a coin in her pocket. Once the necessary penance was paid, Chloé put the jar down and turned to her roommates with a smile. It was time. Time for them to hear her plan.

“Girls, there’s something I would like to discuss with you.”

Chloé had only just said her first sentence when Sarah already let out another groan.

“What?” Chloé asked, somewhat put off.

“I know that face is what. It’s the ‘I’m gonna destroy Diana’ face.” Sarah said.

“I don’t have a ‘I’m gonna destroy Diana’ face!” Chloé retorted.

“Then what you have to tell us has nothing to do with Cavendish?”

“Well...not exactly…”

“See? I knew it,” Sarah said victoriously.

“You don’t understand Sarah!” Chloé said, excitedly shooting up from her chair. “This time it’s going to work! This time I’m going to show Diana what for!”

“That’s what you said about the swimsuit incident and we both know how that went,” Sarah said with a sigh.

Chloé’s response died in her throat as she felt her face heat up in embarrassment. Ah yes, the swimsuit incident. Not the LeBlanc family’s finest hour.

“This is different!” Chloé managed to say, blocking the embarrassing memory from her mind.

From behind her Elfriede joined Sarah in letting out a tired sigh.

“Do you really have to do all these schemes Chloé? Can’t you just try and get along with Diana?” the German girl questioned.

“Spoken like a true Cavendish apologist,” Chloé said with a ‘hmph’, crossing her arms.

“I’m not a ’Cavendish apologist,’ Chloé. That’s not even a thing. All I did was ask her for some help on the linguistics homework.”

“And that’s just how she lures you in!” Chloe said. “If you are truly loyal to the peach team and are not a Diana brain slave in the making, you’ll at least hear what I have to say.”

“Fine,” Elfriede said, resignation heavy in her voice. “Go ahead.”

“Sarah?” Chloé asked, whipping around to face her redheaded teammate.

Sarah gave her a frown, but relented all the same.

“Yeah go ahead. Regale us with your oh so clever plan.”

Chloé felt her heart race with excitement as her teammates gave her the all clear. They were clearly apprehensive at the moment but they’d surely change their tune once they heard her brilliance. Clearing her throat with a good cough, Chloé began her speech.

“Now, as you both know Diana Cavendish has garnered a rather annoying reputation as our grade’s, and perhaps the whole school’s, top witch. But do you know why that is?”

“Because she has an encyclopedic knowledge of all things magic?” Sarah said.

“No,” Chloé responded flatly.

“Is it because she’s dependable and is always there when her peers need her?” Elfriede asked innocently.

“No, wrong again,” Chloé said with a grumble.

“Oh, I know! It’s because she-”

“It’s because she supposedly gets top marks in all her classes!” Chloé said, cutting the German girl off.

“Well yeah,” Sarah said dryly. “She does get top marks in all her classes.”

Chloé couldn’t help but chuckle darkly at that. Oh how naive her team leader was.

“That’s where you’re wrong, my dear Sarah,” Chloé said with an evil grin. “For that is but an illusion, a lie that Diana has led the entire student body into believing. I, however, have seen the truth.”

“Which is…?” Elfriede asked tentatively.

“That Diana Cavendish has not, in fact received the best possible grades in all her classes, but has merely received them in most of her classes!” Chloé exclaimed.

A silent pause fell over the room. Sarah and Elfriede shared a look across the room before letting out a joint “huh?”

“Allow me to explain,” Chloé eagerly said, ignoring a groan from Sarah. “You see, last tuesday in potions class, while I was packing up our cauldron I noticed a certain British snob looking over the tests Professor Lukić had handed back to us.”

Chloé began to pace across the dorm room as she continued her story.

“Usually when Diana gets a test back, she simply nods her head before putting it away in her bag. Yet this time, this time was different,” Chloé said, ignoring Sarah’s interruption asking her how she knew exactly what Diana did with her tests.

“For whatever reason, Diana did not nod in confirmation when viewing this test, no she practically scoured at it. For on the top of that paper sat not the expected A+, no. The grade she had received was in fact...a B!” Chloé shouted.

Chloé whipped around to see her roommates' reaction. Neither had moved. They must have been reeling in shock at her revelation.

“A...B? That’s it?” Sarah asked

“Nay! It goes deeper!” Chloé responded. “You see I had to make sure I wasn’t mistaken, that I hadn’t been seeing things. Surely the oh so incredible Diana Cavendish hadn’t scored a grade not one, but three whole steps below an A+? But she had! And I have the proof!”

Chloé strode back to the desk and picked up the envelope she had been carrying earlier. It was time to deploy her secret weapon.

“Behold!” She said, opening the envelope and pulling out the paper within. “The record of Diana’s potions grades!”

“How on earth did you get that? Sarah asked somewhat worridley.

“I have my sources,” Chloé responded smugly.

“That sounds like an invasion of privacy Chloé,” Elfriede said.

“And kinda illegal,” Sarah added.

“Don’t get caught up in the details,” Chloé said, waving off her friend’s concerns. “Pay attention instead, to the truth!”

Chloé turned the grade sheet so that Sarah and Elfriede could see. Despite their misgivings, both girls leaned forward to read it.

“This page, this mere piece of paper is the key to toppling Diana! For it proves that not only did she indeed get a B on our last test, but that her class average is only a B+!! That’s right, not an A+, not a basic A, not even an A-, a humble B+.”

Chloé laughed wickedly as she threw the paper up in triumph. There! She had exposed the truth! Now both of her roommates were enlightened!

“Is...that it?” Sarah questioned.

Chloé stopped mid evil laugh to whip her attention back towards Sarah. This lukewarm reception was not the response she had been expecting.

“What do you mean is that it!? How is your mind not blown right now??” Chloé questioned angrily.

“Well, It’s just that, I don’t see how that’s a big deal?” Sarah said. Elfriede nodded in agreement.

“This seems pretty...normal?”

Impossible! Chloé could understand how a grounded person like Sarah could fail to see the bigger picture here but not Elfriede too!

“It’s not! Diana is supposed to be perfect! But here she is clearly achieving below perfect scores!”

“Everyone has something they aren’t good at Chloé,” Elfriede said. “It makes sense Diana would have a subject she struggles in too.”

“If you can even call a B+ average struggling,” Sarah added.

Chloé took a step back, wind knocked out of her sails. Clearly her teammates just couldn’t appreciate the gravity of her discovery.

“Hpmh. The two of you may not understand the opportunity at hand here, but that doesn’t mean I don’t.”

“And that opportunity is what exactly? Are you gonna go around the school screaming that Diana has a B in one subject?” Sarah asked.

“No! I’m not,” Chloé said. “If you must know, I will simply out perform her in potions class! When the school hears about how I, Chloé LeBlanc received a higher grade than Diana, they’ll realize that she’s just another witch. Just another girl in school, susceptible to normal grades just like the rest of us!”

Chloé crossed her arms and closed her eyes, a smug, satisfied smile on her face. A silence once again fell over the room until a nervous sound from Elfriede broke it.

“Uh, Chloé? Isn’t there something...wrong with your plan?” the German girl asked.

Chloé’s eyes flew open, and she turned to face Elfriede with a frown.

“Like what?” She asked.

“Like the fact that your shit at potions? Almost as shit as me?” Sarah said deadpan.

“Language!” Chloé retorted angrily, shoving the swear jar back in Sarah’s face.

Sarah starred her down with a frown as she dropped another coin into the jar.

“I am aware of my...lack of skills, when it comes to brewing potions. I know that I can’t beat Diana with luck alone,” Chloé explained. “But I have that covered! You see, I’m going to get a tutor, and under their tutelage, am going to work nonstop until I’m confident that I will achieve the A+ that Diana cannot!”

“That’s your big plan? To study?” Sarah asked incredulously. “That’s what you should be doing anyway for a class you suck at!!”

“You’re failing to see the bigger picture Sarah.”

“Oh yeah? Who are you gonna get to tutor you anyway? It’ll take a godd- er, gosh-darn genius to polish your skills.”

Chloé chuckled to herself smugly. “Oh don’t you worry about that Sarah. I’ve got my eyes on the best potion master in our grade!”

“Sucy Manbavaran?”

“The best approachable potion master in our grade!”

“Barsa McVinegar?” Elfriede asked.

“The very same!” Chloé responded.

“How exactly are you gonna get her to agree to tutor you?” Sarah asked drly.

“Oh please, Sarah, that’ll be easy. You may not know it, but me and Barsa are great friends. She loves me.”

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“Um, I don’t think that’s a good idea Chloé. I’m pretty busy after class these days, and I kinda...don’t like you?” Barsa said to a rather flabbergasted Chloé.

The day after having revealed her master plan to her teammates, Chloé had gone to talk to Barsa as soon as she could. She often frequented the potions lab after school and that was exactly where Chloé found her. The French witch wasted no time in asking Barsa for her help in being her potion tutor...only to be immediately shot down. Okay, so it was a possibility that she had exaggerated how close she and Barsa were to Sarah and Elfriede. In reality, they had barely interacted before Chloé had started this whole scheme of hers. Still, she couldn’t take no for an answer, not now! Not after coming so far! A LeBlanc wouldn’t give up so easily!

“Please Barsa! You have no idea what this means to me!” Chloé said, throwing herself down onto her knees. “I’m begging you! Just a few lessons after class. At least until our next test!”

Barsa shifted uncomfortably at Chloé’s sudden begging. Chloé took this as a sign that her pleading was starting to work. She had no qualms about keeping this up until Barsa cracked.

“I-I don’t know Chloé,” Barsa said, shifting her gaze to look anywhere besides the fairly pathetic witch in front of her. “I already made a mistake in helping you get that grade sheet outta Professor Lukić’s office. If she found out it was missing, I’d lose my job as her TA for sure! Hell, I could have gotten expelled.”

“Yes, I understand that was a big risk for you. Which is why I brought it back, as promised, unscathed!,” Chloé said, jumping back to her feet and handing the envelope containing said document back to Barsa eagerly.

Barsa hesitantly took the envelope, giving Chloé a sideways glance before checking the contents inside. Determining that the grade sheet was in fact unmarred and in one piece, Barsa let out a relieved sigh.

“See? Good as new!” Chloé said confidently. “Now you can slip it back in place of the decoy and no one will ever know it was missing. You see, I gave my word and a LeBlanc never breaks a deal.”

“Deal!? What ‘Deal,’? You blackmailed me into stealing it for you,” Barsa said angrily.

“Well blackmail is a bit of a harsh word, isn’t it?” Chloé said with a nervous laugh.

“You threatened to release pictures of me dressing up as Professor Lukić to the school paper. I’d say blackmail describes that perfectly.”

“Okay so I might have used some underhanded tactics, and for that I’m sorry. Truly I am,” Chloé said clasping her hands together. But that was then, and this was now. Surely you can overlook the past just this once? Isn’t our friendship strong enough for that?” Chloé said hopefully.

“Not really,” Barsa deadpanned in response. “and I’m pretty sure I don’t want to be your friend.”

Chloé gasped, somewhat scandalized. How could a girl with such a cute sounding voice speak such harsh words!?

Seeing Chloé’s shock as a chance to escape, Barsa quickly gathered her things, picked up her cauldron, and made for the door.

“Anyway, Bye Chloé. Good luck with...whatever it is you were doing, I guess.”

Chloé shook herself out of her surprise at these words. Barsa was trying to leave! Leave without agreeing to tutor her! Her window was closing, her plan was practically falling apart before her eyes. It was now or never! Gathering her courage, Chloé leapt at the fleeing form of the other girl, successfully clasping onto her leg. Barsa yelped at the sudden contact, and went totally red in face as she took in the scene Chloé had caused.

“Please Barsa! You’ve got to be my potions tutor!” The French girl begged.

“Just, a-ask another student!” Barsa said through her embarrassment as she continued to try and walk to the door, dragging Chloé with her.

“I can’t! My potion skills are dirt! If I try and learn from anyone but the best, my grade won’t improve enough,” Chloé retorted.

“If you want the best, then go ask Sucy. She’s even better at potion brewing than I am!”

“Ask Sucy Manbavaran for a favor? Do I look suicidal to you!?”

“Alright fine!” Barasa finally relented. “I’ll be your stupid tutor, just let go of me already! And stand up please! It’s embarrassing to see you clinging to me so pathetically like that!”

Completely missing the insult she had just received, Chloé could only hear an angelic choir as Barsa agreed to teach her. It worked! Diana’s destruction was one step closer! Oh she could see it now, the Diana Cavendish and all her brain dead worshipers standing dumbfounded as she, Chloé LeBlanc towered over her stupid ‘B’ with a perfect score!

Releasing Barsa from her grip, Chloé once again rose to her feet, composing herself with a polite cough.

“Thank you for agreeing to assist me Barsa, it’s much appreciated.”

“Yeah, yeah, sure whatever,” Barsa said flatly.

“Then I’ll meet you here after class, for let’s say, two hours or so? Starting tomorrow?” Chloé said, holding out her hand for Barsa to take.

“Ah ah ah, not so fast,” Barsa said, crossing her arms. “If I tutor you, what’s in it for me?”

What? In it for her? Chloé hadn’t expected for Barsa to ask for recompense. She hadn’t prepared a reward. In hindsight, that was probably a pretty big oversight on her part. Something was telling her that Barsa wouldn’t exactly take “the satisfaction of seeing Diana being beaten down,” as a fitting payment.

“Um, I’ll...do anything you ask?” Chloé offered with uncertainty.

“Anything, I ask?”

“Well, within a certain reason-”

“Okay bye Chloé,” Barsa said, turning for the door.

“Wait! Fine! Don’t go!” Chloé said, grabbing Barsa’s arm. “I promise, I’ll do anything that the might of the LeBlanc family name and fortune can achieve!”

For the first time since they started this conversation, Barsa seemed somewhat pleased.

“Okay Chloé, you’ve got yourself a deal,” Barsa said, turning back around to shake Chloé’s hand proper. “Meet me here everyday starting tomorrow as soon as class lets out, and don’t be late. I don’t want to spend more time doing this than I have to.

“Not to worry, Mrs. McVinegar! A LeBlanc is nothing if not punctual!”

“I’m not gonna be an easy teacher either. I can get a bit crazy when it comes to potions. You sure you still want me to teach you?”

Chloé felt her enthusiasm falter a bit at that. Well, it’s not like she expected this to be easy, right? Getting her potion skills up to snuff was always gonna be a bit of an ordeal. Besides, the harder fought the battle, the sweeter her inevitable victory over Diana would be, right? And no matter how ‘crazy,’ Barsa was about potions, she couldn’t be worse than trying to learn from someone like Sucy, right? There was no turning back now! She’d come too far.

“Yes, i’m sure!” Chloé answered confidently. “I’ll be the best student you’ll ever have!

“Sure, great,” Barsa said tiredly, finally leaving the potions lab.

Chloé watched her leave with a satisfied smirk on her face. Phase two of her master plan was complete, and she only had to beg a little! Diana’s demise was practically at hand and Chloé couldn’t be in higher spirits. Sure, Barsa had said that their tutoring sessions would be hard, but honestly, compared to the pain of living in Diana’s shadow, how bad could they be?

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Turns out, lessons with Barsa could be hell. No, actually Chloé was pretty sure Satan himself would want nothing to do with the punishment that Chloé had been enduring everyday after class for the last week and a half. Barsa had not been kidding when she said that she got crazy when it came to potions. It was like the normally passive girl morphed into a completely different person, one fueled solely by rage, and insulting others. Barsa had little to no patience for Chloé’s lack of skills, so rather than starting by reinforcing the basics of brewing, like Chloé had suggested, Barsa had decided to go with a more trial by fire kind of approach. This of course meant that she made a lot of mistakes, mistakes that Barsa didn’t take kindly to. It was like the orange haired girl took each and every fumble as some kind of personal affront to the art of potion brewing.

“And what exactly is that supposed to be?” Barsa had asked harshly, looking at Chloé’s attempt at making a panacea.

“Um, it’s a pa-”

“Because I know that you aren’t stupid enough to try and tell me that that pathetic excuse for sludge sitting in your cauldron is supposed to be a panacea,” Barsa said, slamming her hands on the table and leaning towards Chloé. “You aren’t stupid enough to do that, are you Chloé?”

Chloé could practically feel the venom dripping off of Barsa’s words.

“No! I’m not, Mrs. Barsa, uh sir!”

“Good. Then throw that trash down the drain and start again. From scratch.”

Seeing Chloé’s hesitance, Barsa slammed her hands down once again. “Well, what are you waiting for? An invitation!? Get brewing!”

“Yes ma’am!” Chloé said snapping to action.

And that was basically how all of Chloé’s tutoring sessions went, with her scared out of her skull as demon mode Barsa berated her. Still, as much as she didn’t want to admit it Barsa’s tutoring certainly seemed to produce results. It wasn’t long before potion mixtures and techniques were coming easier to Chloé. Now all that was left to do was see if the training paid off, which is exactly what Chloé currently found herself doing. As she sat there in potions class Friday afternoon Chloé found herself fighting to stay awake for what was probably the fifth time today. She may have been just a tad bit excited about destroying Diana’s perfect girl image and had been unable to fall asleep the night before. Nevertheless, she had pressed on throughout the day as any good LeBlanc would. She would not falter here! Not when she was so close to tasting victory!

After sitting through a class period that felt like it had lasted ages, Professor Lukić finally finished her lecture.

“That’s all we have time for today girls,” the old witch cronned. “I will see you next week.”

There was a general commotion as the witches in the room all began to stand and gather their things, clearly eager to leave the potions room and start their weekend. Chloé was not one of them, as she was starting to feel something that was probably akin to panic, just magnified times a hundred. What about the tests? They were supposed to get back their tests! Did Professor Lukić forget to grade them? Or worse, were they destroyed in some horrible unforeseen accident? Was all her hard work doomed to-

A hand shot up out of the corner of Chloé’s eye. She didn’t need to turn and look to know it was Diana’s. Chloé had long since memorized where her rival sat. Which was a totally normal thing to do, regardless of what Sarah thought. Professor Lukić took notice of Diana’s raised hand.

“Yes, miss Cavendish. What is it dear?”

Diana stood up from her seat.

“Forgive me Professor, but I believe you have forgotten to hand us back our previous test scores.”

A flash of recognition went across the old witches face before she turned back to her desk.

“Ah, right you are Diana. I know I have them here somewhere…”

A collective groan spread across the room as Diana sat back down in her seat. Obviously most of the class was not looking forward to getting their results. It was an open secret that potions was far from the most popular subject. A subpar grade in it being handed back to you was hardly the way any witch at Luna Nova wanted to start their weekend. Chloé couldn’t help but scoff. It was just like Diana to bring something like that up. Chloé bet she was the kind of kid in grade school that reminded the teacher to give homework. It baffled her to no end how Diana maintained all her fans when she pulled stunts like this. Of course, Chloé herself had also been eagerly awaiting her test results but that was neither here nor there.

Having seemingly found the graded tests, Professor Lukić turned back to the class. With a wave of her wand, the papers all began to float towards the seat of the respective students that owned them.

“Overall, you all did quite well. Even I have to admit that I’m impressed with some of the improvement I’ve seen since the last test.” Professor Lukić said. “With scores like these we might finally be able to get into some more dangerous and difficult brews.”

The professor cackled darkly as another wave of groans swept across the classroom. All of it however, was mere background noise to Chloé. The world around her practically fell away as she stared at the test in front of her...and the large A+ written on top in red ink. She’d done it! Actually really done it! She had sacrificed her pride and crawled through the trenches of potion brewing hell to get here, but she had reached her goal! The coveted A+ that even Diana Cavendish struggled to achieve! She had won! For the first time in the history in the halls of Luna Nova The LeBlanc name had reigned sup-

“Woah Diana! You did it!”

Suddenly Chloé felt herself being dragged harshly back to reality. With a speed that almost certainly wasn’t healthy for her neck Chloé turned to face Diana. The British girl had a small smile on her face, her test held in her hands, a large, red A+ adorned atop it. Chloé felt her jaw go slack. She blinked slowly in disbelief. How? How could Diana have gotten an A+ too? How!? Wasn’t this supposed to be her weak subject!? Chloé knew that the proud Cavendish could have never asked for help in her studies!

“See? I knew you’d get that A+”

Chloé hadn’t realized it before, but it was Akko who had spoken earlier, and who was now praising Diana. Wait a minute, since when in the hell was Akko friends with Diana!? It couldn’t be! Not only did she lose her chance at Diana’s destruction but had she also lost a (self-proclaimed) comrade in the battle against the Cavendish tyranny!? The Japanese girl was sitting awfully close to Diana, hell they were practically shoulder to shoulder. When Diana turned to address Akko, the smile on her face grew.

“Yes well Akko, It would appear you were right. Perhaps I was selling myself a little short,” Diana said. “Still, I couldn’t have done it without you.”

Wait a second that didn’t make sense. Akko was awful at potions. How could she have helped Diana-

“Thank you Sucy. Without your lessons my grade never would have gone up.”

The witch in question scoffed in response as she stood up from her seat and walked to the door. “Yeah yeah, whatever. Akko was never gonna stop bugging me if I didn’t help you. Not like you were a difficult person to teach anyways...”

“Don’t mind her Diana,” Akko said through a laugh as her fellow red teammate left the classroom. “I bet she’s just embarrassed with how sincere you were.”

“Oh, my bad. I didn’t mean to embarrass her. Should I not have thanked her so publicly?”

“Nah don’t worry about it. It’ll take more than that to rattle Sucy. Like one time, she…”

The sounds of Diana and Akko’s conversation faded as they too left the room. Chloé remained glued to her seat, her mouth still very much hanging open and her mind still very much blown. She didn’t know what to think anymore. Diana Cavendish and Atsuko Kagari, were friends. Not only that but the notoriously stubborn and prideful Diana had actually asked someone else to help her study. A someone that just so happened to be Sucy Manbavaran. The most unapproachable witch in the entirety of the school. Slowly, Chloé closed her mouth, and turned back to face forward in her seat. She glanced down at the A+ that sat on her paper. What had filled her with near elation only minutes ago now seemed like nothing more than a cheap consolation prize.

With all the force of the disappointment that now weighed on her shoulders, Chloé slammed her head onto her desk. What she had once thought as truths, were broken and what had once been hope, was now despair. She had no idea how this day could get any worse.

“Hey Chloé.” Barsa said as she walked up to the sulking witch.

Chloé didn’t give a response, but more of an acknowledging groan.

“I see you got the grade you wanted. Good for you, I guess.”

Chloé let out another groan. “Good for me? Yeah right. This is nothing now. Nothing but the promise of what could have been.”

Unfortunately Chloé’s words were muffled by the fact that her face was currently flat up against her desk. Barsa considered asking the French witch to repeat what she had said, but just shrugged in indifference instead.

“Yeah cool so you remember our deal right? I help you, you do whatever I ask.”

Chloé raised her head to look at the ginger witch.

“And what would that be?”

“There's gonna be a potion’s expo in town this weekend, but I can’t make it because I’m visiting my family,” Barsa explained. “I was planning on stocking up on some rare ingredients, ones that I won’t get another chance to get my hands on for a while. So you’re gonna go in my place.”

“Okay. So uh when is it?” Chloé asked tentatively.

Sure, Chloé wasn’t looking forward to this at all, but hey with the leadway she gave Barsa, the ginger witch could have asked for a lot worse. What’s one day out of her weekend?

“It starts tomorrow at 9 a.m and goes until Sunday night at 11:30 p.m. The lines can get pretty long, especially for the stuff I’m after, so you’re gonna have to get there early. Six in the morning should do it,” Barsa said.

She turned to take an envelope out of her pocket and handed it to a bewildered Chloé.

“Here. That’s your ticket. Be sure not to lose it. I’ve also got a list of the stuff I need written down in there too. Make sure you get them all, especially the petrified dragon vomit. That’s really important.”

Barsa patted Chloé on the shoulder and made her way towards the door.

“Okay have fun!”

And with that, she was gone. And so was Chloé’s weekend. Finally Chloé managed to find her way to her feet. She slowly gathered up her things and made to walk for the door. As she was contemplating whether throwing herself off of the new moon tower or drowning out by the cafeteria vestibule would be a more fitting end, Professor Lukić emerged from the ingredients store room at the front of the class.

“Oh, miss LeBlanc. You’re still here. Was there something you needed child?”

“No Professor. I was just leaving,” Chloé said dejectedly.

Professor Lukić raised an eyebrow at her student’s clearly downtrodden mood.

“What’s gotten into you girl? Why are you so mopey?” The professor asked.

Chloé cringed at the question. She didn’t exactly feel like explaining her entire ordeal to the old witch.

“It’s nothing professor, really. I’m fine,” she said, hoping her professor wouldn’t press further.

Lukić let out a huff. “If you say so. Still, try and smile a bit child. You did very well on your test. You’ve far exceeded what I thought you were capable of. I’m almost proud of you.”

Chloé blinked in surprise at that. It was practically as close as possible as one could get to receiving a compliment from the old potion master. Despite everything that had gone wrong today, Chloé couldn’t help but smile.

“Thank you professor. I’ll be sure to keep trying my best.”

And with that Chloé finally made her way out of the potions room. It might not have brought Diana to her knees, but suddenly her A+ didn’t feel so worthless.

[realfuurikuuri]

Chapters: 8/? Fandom: Mao Mao: Heroes of Pure Heart (Cartoon) Rating: Teen And Up Audiences

MissingArm!AU: When escaping the cave, it wasn't his tail that got crushed. In exchange for his innocence, he gained a sordid past. The Pure Heart Valley seemed like a good place to escape. To start a new life with a new family to forge a new identity. However, when the past rears its ugly head Mao Mao's forced to step up or be put down.

AN:  Ho boy, this chapter was longer than I expected (again) so this is again going to be split into two parts. So, the title won't make the most sense. I've been putting off uploading it for.... reasons. Regardless, this chapter has very little Mao Mao in it, instead I focused a bit more on comedy. I feel that we need some light-hearted fun after Mao Mao's nonsense. The song recommendation here is Queens of The Stone Age - Go With The Flow. As always, follow @spookylovesboba on Tumblr/twitter/youtube, and enjoy the chapter.

Direct Link to chapter 8 on AO3: XXXXX

What happened?

That was the only question in Badgerclops mind as he picked up the broken pieces of wood. Headquarters was a wreck. The front door had been smashed to pieces, along with a large part of the wall. The TV was broken, which sucks. What doubly sucked was that their couch, Sofia they called it, had fluff flowing like blood. The destruction went through the entire HQ. Not even the dojo was spared. Axes, maces, spears, swords, knives, and arrows sticking out of the walls and floors like the spines on a porcupine.  

And it was all on Badgerclops to clean it up. He didn’t even have Adorabat to help him. She wouldn’t leave Mao Mao’s side, besides, he didn’t want to bring a hyperactive 5-year-old to this tetanus factory. At least his metal hand couldn’t get splinters. It made gathering all the broken pieces of wood much easier. What wouldn’t be so easy was the repairs. The windows were broken, and duct tape might fix the sofa. Duct tape wouldn’t fix the broken equipment in the garage. He couldn’t even salvage any tapes because those were torn apart, too!

What the hell happened?

Badgerclops didn't have time to wonder because the monster alarm began blaring throughout the house. Fine by him, he hated cleaning up. He slid down the pole to the garage, hopping onto the aerocycle. It roared to life despite the damage. Riding the adrocycle alone, Badgerclops couldn’t help but think that it seemed… bigger. He ignored the feeling. Badgerclops revved the engines and slammed right into the garage. His face left a nice imprint on the metal shutters.

“Oh, come on! How did you manage to break the fucking garage, too!” he screamed, clutching his bloody nose.

He blasted a hole in the garage with his laser-cannon (he was going to need to fix the garage anyway) and rocketed towards the valley.

* * *

Badgerclops landed in the valley plaza. Sweetipies were in a panic, running around like chickens with no heads. Muffins was hiding in her bakery, Pinky was throwing bricks through the windows of said bakery. Pinky may be worse than smallpox, but he couldn’t cause this much chaos. At least, not often.

Badgerclops thoughts were cut short, quickly stepping out the way of a laser bolt that left a black stain on the ground.

“Fear me!” Orangusnake yelled, firing a laser tool at the valley. “The Ruby Pure Heart belongs to the Sky Pirates.”

Where’d he even get a piece of heavy artillery?

The entire group stood on one of the roofs with their laser cannon. While the piece of artillery was concerning what was sitting next to it made him open his right eye. The cybernetics zoomed-in, identifying Jǐngtì with a yellow danger outline. If he was half as strong as his father he’d be trouble. More worrisome was that fighting Jǐngtì could anger Mao Mao, and that man had earned his red danger outline.

Badgerclops didn’t think he’d be trouble. Jǐngtì looked less than thrilled. He sat down with his feet dangling over the edge, the purple bandana over his face as he looked off into the distance. Badgerclops hoped it stayed that way.

Badgerclops turned his hand into a megaphone. “Attention all Sky Pirates under the authority of the Pure Hart Sheriff, please kick yourselves out before we do it for you!”

“Like you have that authority! You aren’t the sheriff,” Orangusnake yelled back.

“What! Of course, I do. I’m the sheriff!”

“No. Mao Mao’s the sheriff. You’re just a… cop, I guess.”

“I can be the sheriff, too!”

“I don’t think you can.”

“Listen, I’m not gonna take this from someone who can’t tie their own shoes.”

“Actually,” Jǐngtì spoke up from the sidelines,” Orangusnake’s right. There is only one sheriff per county, which considering Mao Mao’s head law officer of this entire kingdom it would make more sense to call him police commissioner or maybe chief of police. While he is right in saying there can only be one sheriff, it doesn’t make sense to call Mao Mao a sheriff.”

Orangusnake raised an eyebrow,” where’d you even learn that?”

“Learned a lot of law stuff in prison, but fun facts about law enforcement doesn’t matter. We’re here to take the Ruby Pure Heart not shoot the shit with a cop,” said with a roll of his eyes.  

“Right, and their precious, little sheriff isn’t here to stop us!”

“That’s because he’s in the hospital,” Badgerclops answered.

“Oh, is he going to be okay?”

“Camille said he should be out in a week.”

“Tell him I wish him well.”

“You do know that your villains and he’s the sheriff, right?”

Orangusnake squinted his eyes. The gears in his head slowly turning as he realized the problem. “Uh… I hope he stays in the hospital?”

“Wow, going to say that you hope he stays in the hospital when his son is right there? That’s so mean. I think you owe him an apology,” Badgerclops said, exaggerating every expression with a thespian flare.

“Oh… I’m sorry.”

Jǐngtì rubbed his temples. “Orangusanke, for the love of God, don’t listen to the cop.”

“Okay, geez… don’t have to be so mean about it.”

While messing with them was fun Badgerclops figured it was time to move on. He charged his arm cannon and pointed it at the group. “Hey, Jǐngtì can you move to the right.”

“Fuck off.”

“...Hey Sky Pirates, can you move to the left?”

“Okay,” they said in unison.

As soon as they moved away from Jǐngtì Badgerclops took the shot. The blue energy blast taking them -and a sizeable chunk of the roof- flying over the horizon.

“What did I just say,” Jǐngtì screamed at the speck flying over the horizon.

“Give it a rest Daddy-Issues.”

“Yeah, I know. Banging my head against a brick wall," Jǐngtì muttered, "why aren’t they in prison?"

"They are surprisingly stubborn,"

“We’re okay,” was heard echoing over hills, right one cue.

Badgerclops gestured for Jǐngtì to come down. Jǐngtì simply gave him the middle finger. Badgerclops crossed his arms and gestured again. Jǐngtì turned away, refusing to look him in the eye, but Badgerlcops kept staring at him. The silence stretched on for five minutes before Jǐngtì relented with an exasperated sigh. He pushed himself off the roof, dropping to the ground with deceptive grace. He certainly was more dexterous than his mother, perhaps his father, too. Badgerclops’ cybernetics made note of that.

“What do you want,” he spat.

“Nothing, I just wanna check on you,” Badgerclops said in a white-lie.

Jǐngtì seemed to notice something was up. He cocked his head to the side and looked Badgerclops up and down, ear twitching while he thought, his paw dangerously close to that golden dagger. Was he going to attack?

Badgerclops jumped when Jǐngtì suddenly crossed his arms. “Why,” he asked.

“Cause your father would be devastated if anything happened to you.”

Another half-truth.

“Fine. What do you want to ask?”

“Nothing, just come with me,” Badgerclops said.

Jǐngtì gave him a dismissive wave of the paw but followed behind Badgerclops anyway.

First, Badgerclops had to do the normal formalities and procedures. He normally the official nonsense to Mao Mao. Shame the bootlicking stickler wasn’t here. First was the piece of artillery. Badgerclops could tell it was old and those idiots probably couldn’t modify any cannons the airship had. Could they?

“Hey, Daddy-Issues! Know where they got this?”

“In one of the trash piles at the junkyard.”

What the hell was this doing in the junkyard? Questions for later. Right now, he should take a page out of the SKy Pirates book and salvage the trash. Badgerclops went to work with his metal arm, disassembling it, quickly packing it up, and then tossing it all the way back to HQ. With any luck, he could use the parts to fix the garage.

Next was examining the damages. There was the torn roof which he’d blame the Sky Pirates, and that was about it for damages. Oh! And that soot mark on the ground. Badgerclops turned his hand into a hose to wash it off but stopped when he noticed something was off. The black spot wasn’t a scorch mark. It was a hole.

Badgerlcops kneeled down and peered into it. The hole was deep, dark, and dangerous. A hollow space under the plaza was a massive sinkhole risk. He was also sure that some sweetiepie would fall in sooner or later. He was fine with Pinky disappearing into the abyss, but God forbid anything happens to Muffins.

Badgerclops went to patch the hole when he heard Jǐngtì call out,” Hey, fat man.”

“Call me Badgerclops.” You rude little bastard.

“I refuse to believe that’s your actual name, but whatever. You know what this pink, disgusting thing is?”

“That’s just Pinky. Ignore him and he’ll go bother someone else.”

“It’s not the rhino. It's another pink, disgusting thing.”

“Please don’t describe our King like that?”

“I’m not talking about the lion, although he is also pink and disgusting.”

“Then what are you talking about?”

“Just see look over your shoulder.”

“What do you want me to… see..,” Badgerclops words droned off when he turned around.

A blob the size of a house sat in front of them. At least Jǐngtì was right to call it pink and disgusting.

“You know what this is?” Badgerclops asked.

“Why would I know? I got here last month, and I’ve spent most of that hanging with a group of idiots.”

“Just don’t mess with it,” Badgerclops said, taking a few steps to get a full picture of the creature.

It was pink, a semi-liquid, Newtonian fluid… What was Jǐngtì doing?

Jǐngtì stood next to the blob, staring back at Badgerlcops with petty defiance in his eyes. He reared back and kicked the blob as hard as he could. Badgerclops tensed up, expecting something to happen. The blob did nothing except shake like a mound of jello.

“Be careful! If you get hurt your father’s going to hold me responsible.”

“It’s always about my father-”

The blob lashed out. Landing a swift strike to the stomach that sent the boy sprawling across the pavement.

“Jǐngtì!”  

Badgerlcops rushed to Jǐngtì’s side, holding him in his arms. Is he okay? Badgerclops didn't know what to do. The kid made a strange hrrrk, hrrk, noise from the back of his throat. What was it? It couldn’t be good, right? Suddenly, Jǐngtì pushed away from Badgerclops. He stumbled to a stop before emptying the contents of his stomach all over the ground. When he was done vomiting Jǐngtì stumbled back, almost falling until Badgerclops caught him.

“Are you okay?”

“I’m fine,” Jǐngtì said even though the lie was as plain as the nose on his face.

Badgerclops lead Jǐngtì to a nearby bench for him to catch his breath. “How does this feel,” he said, kneeling down to gently touch the bruise on Jǐngtì’s stomach.

Jǐngtì winced in pain, which was enough of an answer. Badgerclops robotic eye revealed that the kid didn’t have any ruptured organs, but they were definitely bruised. He made a mental note to take him to Camille before remembering Mao Mao was there. What to do? What to do? He wasn’t going to leave without making sure Jǐngtì would be okay.

“Hey, Jǐngtì…,” Badgerclops said, looking up to see Jǐngtì wiping tears from his eyes.“You know, I don’t care if you cry, right?”

Jǐngtì waved Badgerclops away, making Badgerclops chuckled before he cleared his throat. “Hey, Jǐngtì uhh… do you need a place to stay? Cause your dad’s not going to be home, and I figure you need a place to stay.”

“Don’t you need to do something about the blob?”

“I’ll set up some tape around it and maybe it won’t hurt too many sweetipies.”

“It already ate the pink rhino thing.”

Badgerclops looked up to see that Jǐngtì was right. Pinky was floating in the mucus. Unfortunately, he wasn’t suffocating.

“Well, I’ll also give it a medal or something.”

“You can stand, right,” Badgerclops said, helping Jǐngtì to his feet.

Things have really gotten out of hand haven’t they, he thought to himself. Badgerclops wearily eyed Jǐngtì. He was a criminal; there was no dispute about that, but Jǐngtì needed someone to watch him, not arrest him. For the time being, at least.

[cowandcalf]

When you get this you have to answer with 5 things you like about yourself, publicly. Then, send this ask to 10 of your favourite followers. 💛

@halespecterwinchester Thank you a lot for your ask! Wow! This is so lovely of you and I always feel special to get them!

I apologize it took me so long to answer your ask but I’m so occupied with the task to put my story up on AO3. And I’m breathing only one air, filled with getting one chapter after another done, revise every single one again, and so on. It’s a hellish work, eats time like a freaking monster and I love it to pieces. So, my answer about five things I love about myself is very easy at the moment.

1. I’m disciplined as fuck. Fanfiction has this effect on me.

2. I don’t need much sleep at the moment. I develop superpowers...kind of.

3. I can eat and drink without knowing what I tasted but still feel stated afterward. I need those damn calories for the gearwheels of my brain.

4. I’m able to drink a lot of coffee without getting jittery. It keeps me alive and kicking to move on in my updates.

5. In spite of all the work and next to my hobby as a writer, I don’t lose my humor. I love what I do. I get a shit load of things done, every day because my reward is working on my story, updating chapters and moving forward. It’s freaking intense but I really enjoy it so much.

My beloved monster “Eyes As Blue As the Ocean” - Chapter 10 is uploaded. Soon chapter 11 is coming.

***

[likeawildthing]

Saving Kittens Thing

Bleeding heart James Potter does his level best to save seven cats from a terrible fate, but Lily Evans, his heartless monster fiancée, tries to thwart him at every turn.

ao3

week one.

Lily Evans to James Potter: no

James Potter: i haven’t asked a question.

Lily Potter: and yet

James Potter: but how did u know???

Lily Potter: your 762 cat pictures uploaded to the cloud james

James Potter: right.

James Potter: it’s just, hes been hanging around the office for the last two weeks…

Lily Evans: you don’t even like cats??

James Potter: but he likes me. 

Lily Evans: ...

James Potter: maybe I never liked them bc they were all assholes?

James Potter: chicken or egg, u know?

Lily Evans: amazing

Lily Evans: see u in a few

Lily Evans: no to cat. yes to takeout for stressing me out

James Potter: ur stressed? im marrying an unsupportive woman in 7 weeks??

Lily Evans: *kiss emoji* eggrolls.

James Potter: yes maam

James Potter to Lily Evans: but look at how CUTE he is

Lily Evans: no

James Potter: he likes milk

Lily Evans: impeachment song voice: no. no. no. no. no. nono. nononono.

James Potter: killjoy! 

Lily Evans: remember the squirrel

James Potter: that was one. time.

Lily Evans: and yet, i have veto power

James Potter: will u always have veto power? like for the next sixty five years?

Lily Evans: sixty four. you’re taking a year off my life.

James Potter: it wasn’t /that bad

Lily Evans: we had to call professionals in??? almost got kicked out??? our lease specifically and unequivocally forbids pets of any kind???

James Potter: technicality, yes, but as mum owns the building, pretty sure i could sway her w/ wedding leverage

Lily Evans: we are NOT having swans, geese, ducks, or other fowl at our wedding. so no leverage for u.

James Potter: killjoy!!!!!

week two.

James Potter to Lily Evans: he is a SHE

Lily Evans: …?

James Potter: THE CAT

Lily Evans: how do u

Lily Evans: nvnmd

James Potter: check ur snaps!!!

Lily Evans to James Potter: when u get home we need to talk abt appropriate things to snapchat.

Lily Evans: random example i’m pulling out of my arse: cats giving birth? 

Lily Evans: not appropriate!!

Lily Evans: also, are u under the bushes in front of your work?

James Potter: ITS JUST LIKE 101 DALMATIONS

James Potter: except cats!

James Potter: and six of them.

James Potter: seven including boots.

Lily Evans: boots?

James Potter: have u seen HER feet? boots.

James Potter: the Miracle of Life. 

James Potter: im transformed.

James Potter: i think i’m rethinking my position on kids                                    

Lily Evans: oh boy

Lily Evans to James Potter: babe. ur going to get fired for sending too many snapchats on work hours.

James Potter: my dad is the boss?

Lily Evans: he asked me to text sense into u. or to bribe u.

James Potter: rude.

James Potter: ...what kind of bribery

Lily Evans: not that kind

James Potter: just checking

week three.

James Potter to Lily Evans: ohmygodacrowtriedtokillmykittens

Lily Evans: 1. not ur kittens

Lily Evans: 2. crows are highly intelligent. i wouldn’t mess w/ it???

Lily Evans: prefer to marry u in one piece if possible

James Potter: whose side are u on??

Lily Evans: common sense

James Potter: do u know me at all???

Lily Evans to James Potter: was it u or my other fiancé who maxed out my library card limit

James Potter: yes. and mine. research for a work thing.

Lily Evans: How To Care For Feral Kittens. Protecting Your Wild Cat From Predators. Three Failsafe Methods for Domesticating A Feral Cat. Chicken Coop Construction. And like sixty kids books about cats??

Lily Evans: ??????????????????

James Potter: this IS technically a work thing, since its at work. 

Lily Evans: stretch, much? 

Lily Evans: cant believe remus let u check out 150 books.

James Potter: he is a Good, Supportive friend. and i have a LOT of free time this month. dad didnt want to stress me out. research is important, which you know! sixty kids books are to Read to the Kittens. good for development.

Lily Evans: ur dad took u off all projects bc he thought you’d be distracted w/ getting married.

James Potter: well im hyper-focused on this instead.

James Potter: and i can be! because we’re mostly done w/ planning, thanks to my gorgeous, intelligent, super efficient, soon-to-be wife. 

James Potter: and i love you.

Lily Evans: nice, but take a book back so i can rent mine. 

James Potter: im going to suggest you buy it on kindle, b/c its 2017??

Lily Evans: it’s the principle. reading is cathartic and an escape from my Many Stresses.

James Potter: gotta go. sirius just walked in w/ a work thing.

Lily Evans: well

week four.

Lily Evans to James Potter: pete told me ur trying to corral the cats into a paper box???

James Potter: traitor! did PETE ALSO TELL U its now crows, plural, and theyre trying to bait Boots out so they can get the kittens?

Lily Evans: he said that’s your story, yes

James Potter: it happened!

James Potter: and so i have to do this, for their safety and well-being.

James Potter: dad wouldn’t let me build a protective structure, so—

James Potter: im just—

Lily Evans: no.

James Potter: listenimgoingtobringthemallhome

James Potter: JUST until we can get them to a shelter 

Lily Evans: NO. james. u cant be the cat savior of the world??

James Potter: true, but i can be the cat savior of potter, inc.??

James Potter: or at least a foster cat dad.

Lily Evans: James. No. We both work 50 hour weeks and we are about to get married and we are about to go on honeymoon?????

James Potter: LILY. they need me. I need to save them.

Lily Evans: oh, babe. ur mom told me about the ducks.

James Potter: the ducks?

Lily Evans: when you were seven.

Lily Evans: is that what this is all about????

James Potter: sure?

James Potter: i mean…must be? i didn’t put two and two together, you know? but yeah. those ducks are, like, weighing really heavily on my…subconscious.

James Potter: i think if could all be resolved if u just give me like, 3 days

Lily Evans: 1

James Potter: 2

Lily Evans: deal

Lily Evans to James Potter: I saw ur ‘home sweet home’ Instagram btw

James Potter: stalker. come downstairs and see them.

Lily Evans: what took u four hours to get home?

James Potter: stopped by the vet to check them out. all looking great!

James Potter: and flea meds

James Potter: and vaccinations for boots

James Potter: aaaand the pet store to get a few necessities

Lily Evans to James Potter: sirius said he’d disown you if you adopted seven cats

James Potter: liar.

Lily Evans: worth a try

Lily Evans to James Potter: six matching kitten sweaters is NOT a necessity

James Potter: disagree

Lily Evans: three hundred pounds???

James Potter: will be much easier to rehome them w/ the proper supplies

Lily Evans: unbelievable.

James Potter: actually got some great deals, believe it or not.

James Potter: she was SO GOOD today. boots. she did not scratch me once and she put flea meds on her and shes all groomed and pretty.

James Potter: and LILY.

James Potter: come down and see them??? they need to meet their grandmum or theyll think you dont love them

Lily Evans: im allergic to cats?? and im not yet 22?

James Potter: u aren’t really allergic. and ur 104 in cat years.

Lily Evans: wow. im going to give u space tonight. the Sofa is yours.

Lily Evans: don’t get too cozy w/ them, potter.

James Potter: I think we know its too late for that, evans.

Lily Evans: veto. power.

James Potter to Lily Evans: ur really not coming down???

Lily Evans: one of us has to stay reasonable.

Lily Evans to James Potter: james. u cant just send me vids of drunk girls w/ a box of kittens

James Potter: can. did. will continue to.

James Potter: left ur fave wine on the stairs. drink some and come meet them??

James Potter: u could be the next youtube sensation.

Lily Evans: pass

Lily Evans: 39 hrs, btw.

James Potter to Lily Evans: did u order takeout just for u??? and are u home?? u didn’t go to work??

Lily Evans: working from home, yes. can u deliver to our room?

James Potter: why don’t u…come down and get it yourself.

Lily Evans: ill starve

James Potter: im coming

Lily Evans: 22 hrs 

James Potter: about that.

Lily Evans: james fleamont potter

James Potter: lil. im sorry. like i am in that we made a deal and I have to break it.

Lily Evans: JAMES FLEAMONT POTTER

James Potter: but im not in that im not sending them on the streets. i called ALL the shelters and they were all full! except for the no kill, which i wont do and neither will u, because im not marrying a heartless monster.

James Potter: and so were the cat fosters! apparently its peak cat shagging season or something???

James Potter: anyway i didn’t know and i did try and i AM sorry

Lily Evans: its ok.

James Potter: it is???

Lily Evans: well…I AM A REASONABLE PERSON but i am NOT heartless. we still cant keep them forever though!! i mean it!!!

Lily Evans: we can keep them until they’re ready to be rehomed tho. except they MUST be gone b4 the wedding.

James Potter: can we keep any of them???

Lily Evans: did u reread the lease?

James Potter: yes. they were very thorough, unfortunately. covered every loophole.

Lily Evans: two decades of being ur parents have trained them well

James Potter: come downstairs?????

Lily Evans: i have to stay strong

Lily Evans: ill bribe you to come upstairs tho

James Potter: ...what kind of bribery

Lily Evans: ;)

week five.

James Potter to Lily Evans: soooo....we have a responsible foster mum from the agency coming to look at my babies tonight

Lily Evans: Good. im tired of living upstairs and I Miss u

James Potter to Lily Evans: can u come home to work this afternoon???

Lily Evans: to clean? how messy have you been keeping it downstairs?

James Potter: pls. I’m the clean one of this power couple!!!!

Lily Evans: tru

James Potter: its about work. apparently im setting a bad example for taking 9 days for paternity leave when i’m about to go on honeymoon? and they need me for a presentation.

James Potter: point is. I HAVE to go back whether we (the cats, me) are ready or not.

Lily Evans: there’s a lot i could say to that babe, but i’ll refrain because I Love You.

Lily Evans: wont they be fine w/out you? or me? i’ve made it this far w/out meeting them.

James Potter: no! they need constant supervision. they’re actually quite the handful. who knew!

Lily Evans: omg

James Potter: Tabitha is due for her antibiotics dose at 3

Lily Evans: 1. uve named them. b. they’re on drugs???

James Potter: just Tabs. responsible fostering!!!

James Potter: we should really keep them until they’re old enough to be spayed and neutered, but I wont let them to go an irresponsible pet owner.

Lily Evans: god forbid

Lily Evans: OMYGOD u cannot just send me pictures of a baby kitten next to her antibiotics jar/??

James Potter: can and did

Lily Evans: if i fall in love w/ them, im never forgiving u

James Potter: thx babe. ill make it up to u.

Lily Evans: so many sexual favors, potter

James Potter: *wink emoji* *cat emoji*

Lily Evans: ew. bad combo

James Potter: yea

Lily Evans to James Potter: FUCK

Lily Evans: f.u.c.k.

James Potter: what happened?????

Lily Evans: FUCKKKKKKKKKK

James Potter: ARE THEY OKAY????

James Potter: also, are you ok

Lily Evans: they are fine. Just. Fine.

Lily Evans: I am not tho

James Potter: are u really allergic???

Lily Evans: only to common sense

James Potter: u fell in love, didn’t u

Lily Evans: NO

Lily Evans to James Potter: damn it. damn u. damn them, too.

Lily Evans: except not really

James Potter: it’s okay

Lily Evans: sorry for my derision and cynicism

Lily Evans: this wld only be better if i were drunk

James Potter: i guess you’ll never be internet famous babe

Lily Evans to James Potter: did u name the others???

James Potter: i left brown one. striped one. and w/ the heart on the nose for you

Lily Evans: yes i could tell because you MADE THEM COLLARS

James Potter: the one w/ the heart on the nose though

Lily Evans: SHE IS MY FAVORITE I LOVE HER

James Potter: can u really bear to part her from her siblings and mum???

Lily Evans: im not a Monster. of course not!

Lily Evans: but we’ll need a nanny???

Lily Evans: and a bigger flat.

James Potter: mum is thrilled actually. about grand-mumming it. not the flat.

James Potter: bad news: meant to tell u btw, she is ABSOLUTELY kicking us out.

James Potter: good news: may have a few house showings scheduled for us for next week, so

Lily Evans: did u knew this was going to happen to me???

James Potter: *kiss emoji*

Lily Evans: did u really even have a meeting at work???

James Potter: you’ll never know. give the babies a kiss me for me. ill grab takeout & be home soon.