#this is also half the size it actually is bc it wouldn't have been able to be uploaded on tunglr........

[lucifer-kane]

Adrift in seas with a violet dawn Where meaning dies in mazes long And waves ascend with bones and teeth You twist and turn beg for relief

[mezzy303]

The new one piece chapter has me spiraling sdjkfshf so here's a theory that crossed my mind and is becoming more plausible the more I think about it

Spoilers (obviously) under the cut

The tl;dr is: What if the world of One Piece has always had rising sea levels/sinking land? What if these natural events happen in an 800 year cycle? What if there was way more land (like the real world) before the formation of the World Govt?

I'm not gonna get into the details of why that is bc that is a different mind boggling discussion and it isn't really important here. But if there's always been that threat, it would explain so much about the Void Century and the True History.

As many people have already pointed out, the threat of the world sinking into the ocean explains why Noah was needed. It's a giant ship half the size of Fishmen Island that was meant to be raised to the surface, likely for the inevitable future where there's virtually no land above water. It could be that threat never happened at the end of the Void Century so Noah wasn't needed, but what if it did happen? This would suggest a huge event happened that caused sea levels to rise 800 years ago.

This ties into my next point, that the Great Kingdom was part of land that is now underwater. We've already seen that there's underwater ruins from Jinbe's cover story where Wadatsumi was throwing ruins onto an island, one such ruin being a poneglyph, meaning that kingdom (maybe the land that island was once part of) was either part of the Great Kingdom itself or allied with it. So it wouldn't be a stretch to consider that the Great Kingdom is also currently below the ocean. It would also have made it easier for the World Govt to completely erase the Kingdom from existence, since it was already underwater and inaccessible to most people other than Fishmen. I can't recall if any ruins that are Void Century old have been canonically shown, which would mean either they've been completely destroyed with nothing left, or the areas have been continuously lived in and renovated, or they're in the ocean and the majority of structures currently on land is younger than the Void Century AKA people moved to higher lands when sea levels rose. It could be all the above too! If the Great Kingdom was at risk of sinking, then Noah might have been meant to carry their displaced citizens.

If those during the Void Century knew sea levels would soon rise, it might have been the reason for all the turmoil that started the Great War. Conflicts over limited resources, about who will live and who will die, general fear and anxiety, things like that. The 20 kingdoms that eventually formed the World Govt might have been suspicious about how the Great Kingdom was using their resources and went to war with them. Maybe they were threatened by how much power the Great Kingdom had as they prepared for the natural disaster (ie. the ancient weapons and Noah; from what we know from Egghead, technology was incredibly advanced at the time). Maybe it was just all boiled down to wanting control over a terrifying situation.

If the land sinking into the ocean is a natural phenomenon, then Joy Boy's apology to the Fishmen and mentioning of his return would mean that the event would happen again. Maybe it happens in an 800 year cycle, which explains why Joy Boy (and those sea kings in the Fishmen Arc) knew that Noah was still needed and how he knew exactly when he'd return. It also explains why Rayleigh warned that if he told Robin about the Void Century when the Strawhats first arrived at Sabaody, she "wouldn't be able to do anything about it as she was then." I think I've always assumed this had to do with the formation of the World Govt and how to dismantle it, but it might actually be about how the world is sinking and through following the poneglyphs, one would find the way to save those in danger of being displaced. The Ohara scholars had discovered this, and now Vegapunk is continuing their legacy by making this info public.

And as I'm writing this, I'm realizing that if sea levels rise/land sinks in an 800 year cycle, this might be the "true history" of the world, or at least part of it considering Joy Boy's story made the Roger's Pirates laugh. But it certainly is important and relevant as the wikia site describes! But why would the World Govt try to hide this? I'm not entirely sure. Maybe for the sake of having control over information and thus having power over the world, but there could be so many other reasons. There's hints throughout the story that suggest they're still preparing for a world with almost no land though, such as the Tequila Wolf bridge that's supposed to connect islands together, and the fact that the founding monarchs moved their families to Mary Geoise on the Red Line. Law also stated in Punk Hazard that the Govt has been researching growth hormones to turn humans into giant soldiers, and they've been doing this for centuries. It's possible that the research was really for the capability to walk through parts of the ocean when there's no longer any land above water.

Anyway my brain is fried thinking about all these things lol. There's so many other factors to consider but I'll save that for a later time when I get more sleep sjdkfhsdk

[seraphsfire]

New kitties update!

Hello everybody meet one of my new toddlers, Jade! I'm excited to tell you guys all about them!

She was a little shy but completely imprinted on me within the first 12 hours or so from first meeting her ;-; she has a lot of personality similarities with Xeno, she loves pets and scratches, will walk on everything, and follows me everywhere except when she is napping underneath my bed. She even sleeps next to me at night already ;-; She has no teeth bc she has like a thousand allergies and was allergic to her own tooth plaque and got sick from it so she had to have all her teeth taken out ;-; she also has dermatitis because she had fleas at one point and was allergic to the fleas and patches of her fur fell out ;-;

but i've been putting olive oil on her food and giving her plenty of hydration so after only one day her skin is already barely flaky anymore, she's itching less, and her coat feels silkier.

She's the most beautiful, sweet little goblin doll baby, her eyes are this stunning grayish-green that i've never seen in a cat before and when she's in good lighting (and holding still, which is also difficult to get her to do lol) I will take closer pictures of her.

I'm exhausted but my anxiety and depression have gone down drastically from being able to pet her, feeling her purring next to me when I sleep, and hearing her eating in the mornings.

My other child is still working on feeling comfortable in the house, he was a feral cat so I am slowly socializing him and I haven't gotten to pet him yet or look at him closely because he's been hiding under the bed. But today when I put my hand under the bed with treats in it, he ate them out of my hand and didn't run away, and has been coming into the kitchen when Jade and i are hanging out a few feet away on the couch, and actually walked up when i was sitting down just now to look at me, so he's making huge progress after only a day for a kitty that was so terrified of everything that they actually put him on anxiety medication skdfsdhgdhg

He's so beautiful too, he's a cream point medium haired siamese mix, he's huge and a similar width to Xeno but has a more angular face and is a lot Longer (almost twice the size of Jade lol). I named him Sunfyre after a GoT dragon because he does look fiery and kind of like a dragon too, and so I can call him Sunny for short.

I was so worried because I wasn't able to separate them at all since my bed is huge and Sunny wouldn't come out, and they did yowl and fight a little bit with each other last night but actually otherwise they're not aggressive or fearful of each other at all and will walk by each other calmly as long as they have at least a foot and a half of space. I've been telling Jade she can't be mean to her new roommate and has to give him space because it's his house too lol.

I miss xeno so much and it does still feel like i'm babysitting somebody else's kitties but I can't wait to give them a happy, calm, and loving space to live in.

One of you donated $20 that really helped a lot, and I have a commission too! I am still taking commissions, please let me know your budget and I'll tell you what kind of art piece I can do for the amount! I'm open to almost anything. Thank you guys for all your financial support, I would not have been able to afford them otherwise so soon after all of Xeno's medical bills. I wasn't planning on getting more kitties so soon but I just saw their little faces and I knew they needed me even though my heart is still broken.

Also of course battling extreme exhaustion just from everything this past month really, the new babies have been keeping me up because I'm trying to do things periodically so they acclimate well. You guys can still donate if you want but you have been so generous so I don't want to keep clogging up ppls dashes with desperate donation posts if it's not an immediate emergency. I would much rather do a commission for you! I can work with any budget, even a few dollars ^^

I'm working on two larger pieces right now so it will be a few weeks for something big but I could get a few doodles for smaller budgets done soon-ish if that is something you're interested in!

You can pray/ send good thoughts and energy that I will get a job soon so I can give them a good life, and that their conjunctivitis from being in the shelter will clear up soon without having to traumatize them with a vet visit so soon after getting them used to so many new scary things.

Anyway, thank you. Love you all. One day if i ever get enough $ i really do hope to pay back your generosity, it's really helped me believe in the goodness of strangers again. and just mentally that is something that has been such a huge thing to experience after all the trauma and death i've been dealing with for like 4 years now.

For now I hope paying you back in kitty pictures will do!

[aphantasia-culture]

just found this account and as a community starved aphantasiac (i made a whole ass post about it on my blog sometime last month i think) i was so excited to see people having conversations about it here!

i'm a generally creative person and love DnD, so i'm sure i will inevitably send in future asks about how aphantasia affects me in those regards but like, omg the driving directions thing in your topic suggestion post—like, that and having a shitty autobiographical memory have probably been the biggest issues for me in trying to navigate the world while having aphantasia.

i've lived in the same city my entire life (except for college), and i can't tell you where jack or shit is. spoken directions mean nothing to me. i know how to get to like, five places from my childhood home without google maps and that's it, and most of those are walkable distances with only one or two turns. the other ones, i could not actually give you the directions to unless i'm on the road. it literally took me until months after getting my driver's license to realize that two grocery stores i'd been going to for literally a decade were right across the street from each other and also just a block from a strip mall that's just a block from my great grandma's house—and when i excitedly shared this revelation with my parents, they teased me about it because yeah, obviously those places are all close together, how have you never noticed that before?

not being able to form mental maps made me so self conscious growing up, like, a friend's parent would try to take me home from an event and i couldn't tell them how to get to my house even though every other kid could direct the parents to their house, and it crushed my little perfectionist heart that i was so bad at something everyone else did so easily? and then i found out about aphantasia and while thinking about it one day i was like, oh, i'm not actually stupid, i'm just operating at a severe disadvantage in this arena! i literally cannot access the cheat code everyone else uses to make this so easy! it was such a huge relief 😮‍💨

i could probably go on but this is already a very long ask. if you have similar struggles and want to just bitch about them with someone for awhile, my inbox is open! :)

Yesssssss send all the DND asks. Struggling to explain what I needed help with to be able to play DND is part of the reason I created this blog.

I can't drive any newish places without a GPS, and I've been in and out of this area my whole life. I can't even get to the library without gps even tho I've been there before, bc it is surrounded by one way streets and that is just too much for me to keep track of mentally.

I've lost appointments to new places bc they didn't have a map of their college campus size facilities, and no matter what I said, they couldn't understand that Google maps wouldn't be enough.

I had the worst meltdown I've had in years just trying to vote, back in August, bc of how convoluted the organization of voting places is. I ended up wandering around in 3 different places all across town for almost 2 hours only to end up at a place that was 5-6 blocks from my apartment.

I am constantly surprised at how close things are together. Like everything is separate in my mind. Like unless they have the same street on their address, or I have to regularly go to both on the same trip, I will not make the connection.

I have a sneaking suspicion that many of my family has aphantasia but I'll probably never tell them bc that would mean talking to them again.

But like probably almost half, bc it was just common sense that certain people could not be trusted with finding their way anywhere, and so would be at least 20 minutes late to everything. These family members would be described as

"they couldn't find their way out of a paper bag. the light at the end of the tunnel would confuse them as to which way was out"

So yeah, I'm starved for aphantasia community too.

[starcrossedjedis]

Genuine question, apologies if I missed where it would be answered already: what is Catelyn Baratheon's ancestry, as in how is she capable of bonding with a dragon? Is it like far back Targ blood through her mother's family? Or, I know Rhaenys and Borros are related but I didn't think HE/his descendants have any Targ ancestry directly? Unless I'm just having a total derp moment rn lol. I love that she goes against her family and everything she knows bc she supports Rhaenyra as the named heir! She and Jace look cute

Hey,

thank you for sending me this 🥰

There's actually three (two and a half, really) possible answers to this 🤗

1. Orys Baratheon really was Aegon the Conqueror's bastard brother, thus making house Baratheon Valyrian by default. And with the whole "the seed is strong" stint they got going this is still Valyrian enough to be able to go claim a dragon.

2. Catelyn is a stubborn little thing who wants to do her part and is made all the more determined by Jace flat out for I ding her to take part in the Sowing. So she steals away into the caves as it is happening and bonds with Kairax, a she dragon the colour of the stormy sky over her home, that isn't part if the Sowing, because she is young and barely grown enough to be mounted.

But Catelyn herself is a petite thing too, so the dragon's size doesn't really factor with her. She also spent her formative years around dragon riders and the boys always used to take the Baratheon girls to the Dragonpit with them. And while this only server to cement her sisters fear of the beasts, for Catelyn is was quite the opposite, which left her a lot more comfortable around them than probably most outsiders.

She also caught a few snippets of Valyrian here and there - not a lot, as we see Jace himself doesn't really speak it, but I imagine that they all know what they need to speak with their dragon's much like any other rider would speak to their horse.

eg. "it's alright... hush... well done... come here..."

So wether it is a drop of true Valyrian blood somewhere in her veins or if she just profits from her adolescent dragon's curiosity and surprisingly gentile nature, in the midst of the Sowing Catelyn emerges from the caves on Kairax's back.

(Also - answer 2 1/2 - this my fic and my OC and I wanted her to have a dragon, so she gets one xD)

She is so elated and proud, but soon realises that this act of defiance also serves to further anger Baela, because Rhaena is still without a dragon and while she is still holding out hope to hatch an egg of her own, Kairax had been kept aside to be hers by Daemon and her sister.

So when Jace dies, Baela wastes no time to make it known that her betrothed's mistress is no longer welcome at Dragonstone and is expected to leave - without the dragon she "stole"...

And on that last bit, I love how Catelyn mirrors her mother's story in how they both so firmly held on to their childhood dream and idea of love against what the world was throwing at them.

Sadly for Catelyn though, her dream was never headed towards a happy ending and it's hard for her to get over knowing that even if Jace had lived, he wouldn't have chosen her and all she truly lost was the memory of a boy she loved and an uncertain, unhappy future as his mistress.

She broke with her family and all she's left with now is a broken heart and a ruined reputation...

[adelaidedrubman]

you're enemies, but there's tension, and you can feel your enemy's fingers trace down your body... you allow them to explore, and when your enemy pulls away, worried they've gone to far, you place their hand back on your body for the usual suspects 😌

thank you raven <3 and also thank you amanda <3 @scungilliwoman bc i decided to combine these since they are both perfect for classic "ooooh nooo i have to treat my enemy's injuries i guess..." scenario.

word count: 2.8k

pairing: john x jestiny

warnings: some steaminess with like one line of potential real nsfw. some references to violence (including between the clowns themselves) and injuries. some references to wildfire events, so mild spoiler warning (nothing detailed) for anyone not caught up. john's headspace. jessie's shirts.

The first thing John is able to put together, blinking eyes open to will away the residual blur of his vision, rubbing at his lids to chase away the sparks that dance, obscuring his surroundings, is that he's in a bunker — all sparsely furnished metal and concrete, and lumpy mattress beneath him, which was truly the first discernable sign he wasn't waking up in his own bed. The second thing he's able to put together, which is much more concerning, is that it isn't his bunker, the layout of the room that finally comes into focus entirely unfamiliar and lacking any of the Project's markings along the walls, no signs of the faithful.

And the third thing he finally sees clearly is that not only is the room not shared with his faithful, it is shared with the infernal deputy, that short crop of copper standing out as one of the few pops of color in the dim and drab surroundings. And that's what makes him finally sit up properly, feeling his muscles complain at the movement.

The rustling of the sheets seems to draw her attention, making her turn around, pulling the plastic medical pan she'd been filling with her to hold propped at her cocked hip as she glanced over to him. Further assessment of the situation didn't inspire any additional optimism as he took in her full form, the standard t-shirt bearing an obnoxiously loud graphic design (this one in particular appeared to be the silhouette of a downward curved fishing pole with line pulled beneath blue ripples, but he frankly wouldn't have bothered to try to make out what the screaming yellow bubble letters actually said even if the effort didn't make pain crack through his skull), unburdened of its sleeves and tucked into denim, but this time with the troubling addition of his favorite silk shirt speckled with blood and tied around her waist, and a loop of leather hanging around her neck to disappear beneath her collar that — gripping with panic at his own bare throat and chest — he quickly realized was the key to his Gate.

Jessie merely gave a crooked closed mouth smile in response to his show of panic, stepping towards his bedside.

“Good, you're not dead,” she remarked in a dull monotone, not sounding particularly glad at all.

“Where am I?” he asked, croaking the words slightly as he cleared his throat, tasting a hint of copper as he did.

“Bunker,” she snorted plainly, taking a seat on the small sliver of the twin sized bed available to her. “Not sure whose, half the fuckers 'round here got one in their backyard. Ducked into the first one I could find, away from the gunfire.”

“Gunfire?” he questioned in follow up, closing his eyes to recall flashes of explosives and the hot, smoky smell of gunpowder. “Is it here?” he asked with a nervous rise. “Is it The Collapse?”

“Is it the — Gotta be goddamn kidding me...” she grumbled, throwing her hands in the air a bit in irritation. “No, John, it's not the fucking Collapse, it's never gonna be the fucking Collapse!” She slapped her hands against her knee, gave an annoyed huff. “It's just the baseline level of civil uprising you fuckers have incited, so we got a little fuckin' skirmish going on topside incident to that as per fucking usual,” she complained, that shrill screech of hers igniting the darts of pain shooting through his head. “Except this time, by the grace of god, you took a nice little tumble out of that pretty plane of yours, and didn't deploy your parachute too good either.”

He rubbed along his aching temples. He remembered now, the sight of the Affirmation hurtling toward the ground in front of him, fumbling for the cord of his parachute, not catching nearly enough wind to slow himself as much as he needed before hitting the ground, the hard impact of the earth felt in his ankles as his legs gave out. He bent and moved them now, with no difficulty besides the stabbing pain, to ensure they weren't fully broken, at least.

“Now, how many fingers am I holding up?” she asked, moving a peace sign back and forth towards his face.

“Two,” he groaned, the quick movement of her hand making him a little queasy.

“Good,” she acknowledged, dropping only her index to join the fingers folded under her thumb while the other remained extended. “How many am I holding up now?”

“One,” he hissed, sneering at her childish dramatics. “And given the obvious hostility, may I ask if there's a reason I'm not dead now?”

“Bad luck, I guess,” she answered with a shrug. “Didn't hit the ground quite hard enough. Now, can you tell me what my shirt says?”

He focuses his eyes on the text in instinctive acquiescence, then unfocuses them just as quickly when it shoots pain through his sockets and he remembers that he doesn't have to listen to her.

“You know what I actually meant,” he snaps, trying to narrow his eyelids to mimic a glare despite his inability to focus his pupils to properly shoot daggers. “Why didn't you kill me?”

“Gonna need you to read the shirt for me, John,” she deflected, pulling it taut to better display the text. “Gotta see if you got a serious concussion or just a bad headache.”

“I need to know why I'm here,” he responded snidely, bunching hands in the thin, scratchy bed linens.

“I'll answer you if you try to read the fuckin' shirt for me,” she grumbled, returning a proper glare.

He sighed, made an arduous effort to focus his eyes again, feeling a sharp ache behind them as he forced them to train onto the tacky font next to the graphic of a downward arched fishing pole.

“‘I love it when she bends over,’” he spat out, packing each word with appropriate disgust. He'd always thought she'd really worn those awful things just to get a rise out of him.

“Good job,” she chimed, finally some real inflection in her voice that wasn't annoyance. “Guess your head ain't so bad.”

“And my answer?” he pressed, irritated. “As to why you dragged me down here instead of killing me?”

She shrugged, grabbing a cloth and spray bottle from the tray she’d sat behind her. “Not really a lot of honor in killing you when you’re already out cold,” she said casually. “Pretty empty victory.”

“Then why didn’t you leave it for someone else to do? Or simply leave me there?” he continued to pry.

“C’mon, John,” she sighed with a little pinch of her brows, twisting the nozzle of the bottle she held. “We’ve always dealt with each other with a certain level of sportsmanship, haven’t we?”

We. He hung his hazy head on the weight of that simple phrasing. There always had been a them — hadn’t there? Something separate from their respective sides, as guilty as that made him feel at times, because the Project was his entire self. But there was also a them, he hadn’t just imagined that, after all. A small part of him that merged to something different, an unspoken —

“Fuck!” he cried out, stinging pain singeing along the exposed skin of his stomach as she sprayed antiseptic along it, violently jolting him from his thoughtful musings on her choice in pronouns. His vision had been so unfocused already that he couldn’t tell if tears were blurring his eyes, as she rubbed her little cloth along raw skin, finally placing a bandage over it. “Warn me next time!” he spat at her, curling in on himself a little.

She simply shrugged, keeping her eyes pointed below his gaze, at his torso. He could endure the pain, if she’d just had the decency to let him know first, so he could properly brace himself and retreat into his thoughts. And what had he been thinking about again? Ah, yes.

“But why this?” he questioned, briefly looking down at the antiseptic she sprayed at a scrape along his chest this time. “Why drag me down here, treat my wounds?” He thinks if she says ‘sportsmanship’ or ‘honor’ again, he might use what little he has left of his physical energy to strangle her.

She scoffs, irritated, sprays another burst of the stinging disinfectant along his shoulder, scrubs it with the rag a little harder than the spot before, as if to try to drive him off track again. Nice try, he thought spitefully. If anything the pain was centering, focusing, now that he expected it.

“You were in a really bad way,” she explained, flat and under her breath. “I wasn't about to abandon you.” She placed a final bandage on him in punctuation to the statement, shifting back a little to look for any spots she missed.

That was an answer, but not one that made John feel any less angry, because it stung like a taunt. I wasn’t about to abandon you. It seemed pointed, it seemed mocking. Because she was always mocking, wasn’t she? And always frustratingly insightful, too — she’d know the alluring, comforting warmth that would make swell in his chest, the promise of not being abandoned. And how dare she.

He was considering saying that aloud, shouting some form of ‘how dare you’ in her face, when she placed fingertips back to his chest, seeming to consider an older wound there, a little more healed, and the little furrow of her brow derailed his train of thought again. She seemed to be trying to calculate its recency, likely determining if it needed treatment as well, perhaps wondering if she gave it to him (she didn’t, an improperly restrained sinner lashed out during a confession, a few days ago).

She seemed to have come to the conclusion herself that it wasn’t in need of immediate treatment, and that it wasn’t her doing, as she lifted her fingertips from the particular wound to find and take stock of the fully healed scars she was responsible for — a few on his sides, another on his shoulder blade. And he guessed from the immediacy with which her fingers found the particular spots that she remembered giving them to him, although seeing him unclothed for the first time, she might be surprised to find that they joined an entire canvas of scar tissue.

But she didn't just touch along the scars, either, dipping her fingers between two knots at his shoulder to ghost along a sample of smooth skin instead, trailing along the muscles of his chest in consideration, dipping to trace along his sides, and he shifted his arms back to allow access, because it felt so good to finally be exposed like this to her. He spent so much time exposing others, and using his own hands, it felt so good having someone use theirs to explore the outline of his bare body like this, seeing everything and still wanting to touch and touch and touch.

Except she didn't. She stopped touching, with a sharp little intake of breath, and that hard to decipher burning inside him leaned towards fury again, because she probably recoiled in disgust (even though she’s never done that, she’s pounced and gnashed and clawed in retaliation but never really recoiled, not from him) and she surely regretted touching him at all, helping him at all. But he willed his vision to focus again, only just realizing his eyes had closed to savor the sensation of her touch, and those wide ambers of hers looked more scared than disgusted, those panicked doe eyes he only saw on rare occasions, and there was a dusting of pink along her cheeks.

“Sorry,” she muttered, averting those shaky eyes to glare at her own hands, using them to toss the medical supplies strewn along the bed back into the pan. “Should be all good, at least on the outside, can’t rule out internal bleeding, god willing.”

She dropped the package of band-aids she held as his hand darted out to circle around her wrist, pull her in closer to him in the same motion he pressed her hand back to his chest, drawing in a deep breath, letting her feel it against her palm with the heave of his chest before he leaned in towards her, shifting his legs a little to situate her in his lap.

“I’ve wanted you to touch me for so long,” he murmured to her, letting the deep breath he’d taken out in warm whispers against her face. He did, he did. And it couldn’t be that wrong, could it? To want to be touched, adored, just for a moment? He moved his other hand to splay her fingers along their place resting at his chest. “Wanted to do this the first time you ever touched me,” he continued, encouraged her hand to caress him again, finally wrapping his arms around her waist. “Wanted to pull you over the table to me, kiss you then. Brother Daniel and whoever else was watching be damned.”

She snorted in laugher at that, relaxing into her place on his lap, one hand exploring his chest as the other ghosted along his back. “Well you didn’t, did ya?” she whispered against his lips.

“No, I didn’t,” he responded, lips brushing hers as he spoke. “What wasted time.”

She hummed and nodded in response, leaning forward to press their lips together properly, hand on his back shifting higher to wrap around his shoulders as the one at his front trailed lower and lower, until it played absentmindedly at the firm, twitching muscles just beneath his belly button. Only upon feeling her touch linger maddeningly close to the waistband of his briefs did he fully process he wore nothing but underwear covered with paper thin sheets, and she could certainly feel how rigid he was anyways, so there was really no harm in circling a hand around her wrist again, pulling her hand further down to push aside the covers and slip beneath elastic.

But she bit into his lip with a surprised yelp the second she made contact with the part of him that truly needed to be touched — which frankly he wouldn’t have minded — if she hadn’t also jerked her hand back, making him give a little whine against her mouth as he felt that bitter sting of rejection.

“You don’t want it?” he ground out, a little too accusatory, probably, but his control was slipping in more ways than one.

“I — Yes. No. Not now,” she stuttered out. “Not when you’ve just gotten the shit beat out of you.”

He tried to glare, but with the pounding still in his head he knew it probably came off as more of a pout instead, all protruding bottom lip without the venomous stare he needed to really sell it. “I’m fine,” he hissed.

“Your head’s still fucked up, if nothing else,” she said decidedly, slinking away from him again, pacing along concrete, towards the exit ladder. “Not gonna fuck you when your mind’s not right.”

Not when his mind's not right. So there was a chance when it was, then? “Are you leaving?” he huffed.

She looked up at the vaulted door in consideration. “No,” she answered, looking down but still not back at him. “Better to wait until the morning, when all the dust has settled.”

“You could at least come back to bed and hold me, then,” he reasoned, allowing himself to lay back. It was a humiliating thing to ask for, but his head was apparently fucked up, according to her, so it shouldn’t matter. “I could be bleeding internally, as you said. I could be dead by tomorrow. It would be nice to die with some human contact, at least.”

She jerked her head to give him a questioning look, but he simply closed his tired eyes to the sight, hearing her sigh a moment later.

“Mmm, no promises,” he sighed, wrapping an arm around to pull her closer as he feels his consciousness begin to fade. In that moment, he almost wished it was finally the arrival of the Collapse, and they’d be locked there together — just them — wrong as that was to hope for. And tomorrow, he won’t hope for it. Tomorrow he’ll try to stealthily slip his key from around her neck while she still sleeps and sneak out with her none the wiser. Tomorrow, he’ll blame all this on the fact he must have been concussed or in shock, and forget the incident. Or maybe, if they are still stuck there, tomorrow he’ll convince her of the opposite, that his head isn’t ‘fucked up’ and he won’t shatter to pieces if she makes love to him properly, then blame that on the shock day after next, adjusting the schedule just a bit.

“Fine,” she grumbled, followed by footsteps, and he felt movement at his side as she gently pushed him over to climb in beside him, pressed tight against him in the cramped space of the bunk. He kept his eyes closed, but he could feel hair tickling along his arm, and her breath falling at his chest, and a toned arm draping over his stomach. “But if you do die, you better not haunt me.”

But for now, drifting off to sleep, it just feels good to be touched.

[hollyhomburg]

What about pregnancy in packtan? Would Namjoon being the first to get the reader pregnant since is the pack alpha or maybe another one, like Jungkook? (you know, since is the golden maknae i can see him acing even in this) Or maybe one of the beta? Could another omega get her pregnant or they status wouldn't permit it? How would they react if the first pregnancy it's not with Namjoon? I think it's they would be happy but at the same time a bit anxious bc of it?

okay so! this might come as a little bit of sadness to everyone- but I don’t think vikingverse reader ever has pups of her own or at least has a really hard time getting pregnant. Not to the fault of the others honestly- they try very very hard to get her pregnant once she decides that she wants a pup. By this point, I think that Seokjin and jimin have started to have their own pups too. Seokjin is the first one to get pregnant, by namjoon with twins too! an alpha boy and an alpha girl. Seokjin already with his second child on the way and jimin with a newborn little girl, a beta, that keeps all of you up. 

I think Seokjin and jimin are a little worried, tiptoeing around you with their children even though you’re like- so so loving with them, especially Seokjin’s little one who only ever wants to sit in your lap and eat dandelions, you love them like they were your own, you really do- but sometimes you see the way that the others are with their baby bumps.

You see jungkook giggling with seokjin’s daughter, “appa appa! wanna ride on appas shoulders!” how careful and loving they are- and it’s not like they’re not that way with you but- you want that- at least once. 

you get into an argument about it- the others Certain Somethings wrong, and you unwilling to admit that you’re jealous, that you're sad, that you want what you can’t have. and like you always do when you get sad- you run to the woods, sinking into its familiar arms like an old friend. it’s late into the evening, not quite sunset but edging there when you happen upon a whimpering in the underbrush. 

you’re stunned a little, when you see a small wolf pup sniffing around, growling at a flower before it playfully lunges and nips at it- the pup must not be more than a week old and it’s terribly small.  one of it’s siblings trundle though the underbrush and you realize- oh- it must be the runt, it’s so much smaller, so little and chubby, barely half the size as its sibling. 

it’s then that you hear a deep rumbling growl, right behind you, and turn face to face with their mother. 

so basically, she ends up stealing the little runt of the litter and fighting off the mother wolf, knowing that like- the runt will likely die anyways and when you turn up to the packhouse with a little furry thing tucked under your arm nozeing under your neck and a bleeding bite mark on your forearm, yoongi literally wants to slap some sense into you- but somehow, he can’t find it in himself to actually be angry, especially when he sees you smiling down at the baby wolf. 

you name the pup ‘little dove’, after her soft little whines and small cooing noises she makes when she curls up in your lap, and though it’s faced with no small amount of ire from the rest of them. “I didn’t think that you’d actually bring a wolf pup back to us” the moment they insinuate that a wild animal might not be the best addition to your little family- they’re met with a glare from you, “i practically was a wild animal- and you still let me stay” “you needed training though,” jimin gets a little cuff on the back of the head for that. 

little dove ends up being quite the addition to your pack, toddling after seokjin’s male child- her best friend, you can often find the two of them curled up in front of the fire. she’ll lick the face of anyone that would pick her up, and sits with her head on top of your feet at mealtimes, sometimes going over to nuzzle into hoseok’s lap for scraps of whatever they’re eating, the oldest alpha never able to resist spoiling her with rubs and food and anything the little one wants. 

As she ages she ends up becoming something of a guard wolf for you, following you no matter where you go and sleeping either in the main room or in some corner of the packhouse that is soft and warm. you’ll take her out with you to walk in the woods to collect herbs and she even carries your basket for you in her mouth. she’s so intelligent- sometimes you think she should even be able to shift- honestly, it wouldn’t surprise you if one day she did. 

needless to say- when you actually do get pregnant- after many years of trying, little dove won’t let any alpha not in your pack touch your stomach. and when the triplets are born, yes Triplets, damn Jungkook and his excessive fertility, because the first one born, is definitely his with those deep brown eyes. you think all of them will be jungkook’s, but next comes your little alpha with hoseok’s red hair, and then a tiny omega boy that smells so heavily of namjoon you can’t deny that he’s his. the little boy is so small you never want to put him down. 

you think something elce might be afoot- something weird that happened with your heat, because how else could each of your pups smell like a different alpha? you don’t question it too much, because after so many years of trying you’re just- happy to have them all (and i think that secretly- her being on the contraceptive herb for so long probably fucked up her reproductive system a little which is why she had the triplets) little dove is your best helper, always comes to get you in the infirmary when one of them starts to stir, nudging at your elbow and Whining low tugging on the edge of your skirt in the direction of the basket where they all sleep. 

and sometimes though it's hard for namjoon to trust the wild animal, he can’t deny that it makes him feel better- especially once the pups start to get older enough to want to explore on their own. it helps Also, because the pack ends up having a fair amount of pups too, too many for all of you to keep an eye on. there are namjoon and Seokjin’s alpha twins, Jimin’s little omega girl, then a little beta girl by Seokjin and yoongi, a beta pup by jimin and Taehyung, bringing the total pups to a grand total of eight. And always, Little dove will follow them, even once defending them from a pack of coyotes. 

she also keeps the younger pups in line, sometimes- your whole family ends up going out to walk by the shore, and Seokjins little ones will be bounding Across the rocks, be about to slip and fall into the water before her mouth clamps down on the back of his shirt.  keeping the young one from dropping three feet into the sea. everyone sort of watches with bated breath as she carefully pivots and releases him back onto the rocks. “good girl” Seokjin praises, coming forward to hug around little dove’s neck. his son in hand.

it’s kind of super sweet- the way she’ll always growl whenever one of them strays too far or does something stupid and dangerous. sometimes, when all of the pups are sprawled out in front of the fire after a long day, the others will see little dove carefully licking at their faces and their hair and comment wryly that maybe little dove thinks that they’re her pups. 

Unfortunately, as the lifespan of grey wolves is only 6-8 years she can’t live forever. she dies soon after you have your own pups, and you can’t help but feel that she stayed alive long enough to make sure you weren't alone. you always think of her as your first pup.

(also I think that for omegas- it’s not quite as uncommon or as deadly for them to have twins/triplets as it would have been for actual Vikings. at first, the others are little worried especially when it becomes clear that she’s pregnant with more than one pup, but they have some experience with Seokjin so they mostly just keep like- a really really close eye on her)

[procrastinatingfeminist]

I've been sucked into the 911 fandom without having watched the show (I am having flashbacks to Firefly, that's how that started, too), so the time has finally come to remedy that. I have two days off plus the weekend, let's see how far I will be able to dive in.

What is hilarious though, is that I know plenty of things that happen in the show from all the fanfic I have already read. And so far the first season looks like a completely different show than the one that I have read about.

- Buck actually does start out as a very annoying bro type character. I got the impression he was slated for a woobie niche right off the bat. He wasn't.

- While the therapy session is seriously fucked up, I have say the way he asked her if she is the one who friended him on Facebook... does sound somewhat manipulative. Also interesting, that this was the one and only therapy session we have seen. Did she refer him to another doctor? Did he stop therapy once he got his dick wet? Did he get only one session covered by the department? So many questions, absolutely no answers. And honestly, it doesn't make Buck look good.

- For all that fanfic writers love to dump on Abby, like the majority of fandom often does with female love interests in the way of their ship, the only reason Buck turned even a bet likeable at the end of season 1 was because of Abby. She was the character development he badly needed. (Though the way she just disappeared on him is justifiably self-serving. Still, I do believe that she was real with him up to the episode with their second date. That is the moment their romance started fizzling out. There are ways to write about it without turning her into an absolutely heartless bitch).

- I think I wore similar kind of frames as Abby up to fourteenth birthday. Those look so dated. Everyone told me how unfashionable my glasses looked. It's real: everything comes back again.

- Everyone who has a family member that is dependent on specialized care deserves someone like Carla. I wouldn't have loved if my mom had someone from homecare service to help her with my grandma that was at least half as helpful and nice as Carla. Instead of whatever the fuck useless twats she had to rely on.

- What the hell is Chimney's problem? Aren't the guys supposed to be good friends? Like, Buck is Chim's little bro? I can't see anything good-natured in their relationship - or more like the good-natured bit is one-sided. Must be the chip on Chim's shoulder that is the size of the moon that is hiding all his affection for Buck. Chim is an asshole and a bully and I don't like him. Even if Buck comes with his own shitload of problems, he could have just as well kept professional distance, but these constant cutting barbs and barely checked envy and jealousy are so damn annoying.

- I thought the rebar thing was some fan writers idea of spitballing emergencies. I am shook to find out that it is really canon. This sound so fake, I always thought it was the least believable part of any fic.

- Isn't Buck supposed to have some super broad but arcane knowledge? Knowing some pretty weird stuff in weird detail? Haven't seen that in canon just yet. Only thing special about him is that he doesn't have some of the normal hangups.

- Best characters so far: Athena and Hen. Even the cheating arc doesn't diminish how good written Hen is. Instead of unlikeable it makes her more human and relatable. (Also, the actress is so breathtakingly beautiful). Athena ... is just Athena. If I start writing why I like Athena, she will need her own post.

- Goddamn that scene with the handcuffs and sex date had me in stitches. Such brilliant writing.

- Makes me wonder though how insulated she is as a cop against consequences with that 'skanky hoe' thing. That was so not okay, and she still got mad bc she had to file paperwork for a couple days instead of roaming the streets???

- Don't get me wrong, I love Bobby's backstory. But I really think that if he fucked up this badly, that no fire department would touch him anymore; lest give him a job as the captain at the station. The insurance alone would shoot through the roof and make him unemployable. Any asshole that wants to sue the dept and finds out about his history is gonna see dollar signs. That said - his character makes a sad sort of sense. Another piece of brilliant writing.

- In conclusion: if I only had watched season one and only seen the impressions of the show based on tumblr posts I would be wondering what the hell everyone is smoking who likes Buck and Chimney and hates Abby; and wonder where all the other firefighters and paramedics at the station are because we see almost exclusively Buck, Hen, Bobby and parttime Chim. I get that the reason is budgetary constraints but I think the only time we see something approaching the full shift is Chims party. Where was the rest of the station with the plane crash? What about the wedding? Are there at least some people they are familar with on the scene?