#this is literally the first digital art I’ve done with a tablet which feels insane

[darngosh-art]

Petition to make them feral again

[archadianskies]

Whumptober Day 23

Exhaustion + Sleep Deprivation  → part of the MT-RK900

Whumptober Masterlist | 23/31 of RK900 short stories ↳ on Ao3

Tags:  Post-Pacifist Best Ending x Exhaustion x Sleep Deprivation

{Character sheet + bonus art here, and here. }

It starts small, starts as barely noticeable symptoms that can easily be mistaken for something else. Nothing is easily mistaken to him, nothing is ever dismissed casually, not when he deals with people’s lives on a daily basis. That includes the lives of his colleagues too, and today, specifically, it involves the lives of his human colleagues.

“Dr Fitzpatrick, you are exhibiting the initial signs of influenza.” He tells his senior, the Director of the trauma unit and his attending leader for the shift. “It is best to take precautionary measures and time off to recuperate whilst removing yourself from possibly infecting others.”

“What?” She blinks at him, brows creased and lips pursed in a frown. “It’s been a long shift, that’s all.” He says nothing, though his expression must say a lot because her frown deepens. “You’re sure?”

“With adequate care you will recover much quicker and stop the spread amongst our colleagues, than if you were to continue working and possibly, quite rapidly, infect others.” Ronan says evenly. “Influenza season is already underway, we are treating more and more patients everyday and we have had three deaths already.”

She gives him a long hard look, searching his face for some sort of reaction before she sighs tiredly. “Are there others on the team you think might have it?”

“There are four possible nurses, one clerk, and two registrars also exhibiting early signs.” Ronan informs her and she groans into her hand, rubbing her temples. 

“It’s not up to me to give others time off, you know.”

“I know. But you can speak to the right staff, and I can give them my findings.” He nods.

“We’re run off our feet already, and you’re rostered at Jericho for the next three days!”

“I can change that. Androids are not susceptible to influenza, and aside from the cold weather affecting some of the older models, we weather winter well.” He glances at the door. “If you can help arrange it, I will stay on for the week and use mainly a team mostly made up of the other android nurses here, minimising the risk of infection amongst the staff.”

“Ronan, you- that’s insane! No one can work an entire week, especially not in trauma!”

“No human can, but I am not human.” Ronan reminds her gently, and he knows she is tired and she knows he is counting on this. She relents, shoulders sagging.

“Four days. Not seven. Four, and I will aim to be back by then.” She points her finger at him accusingly. “Don’t you dare take on more than you can handle. You’re the best trauma surgeon I’ve ever worked with, so god help me if you run yourself ragged because you’re too damn nice!”

* 

So it begins. After careful negotiations the ration rises from five human nurses for every one android nurse, to two humans per one android. Ronan assigns various amounts of memory in his processing core to take over the clerical duties, and the E.D. phone is now answered by an ST300 temporarily stepping in from reception. This means she can answer the call and feed the information directly onto his HUD for ease of triaging. He keeps patient charts in a digital folder, and medication schedules, and theatre bookings.

He utilises programming that would normally be used for listing mission objectives and keeping tabs on the status of other soldiers in his battalion, for good instead, for saving lives and managing their care. At the seventieth hour mark, one of the android nurses pass him a bottle of thirium and he drains it, belatedly realising his levels are below optimum given how fast he is burning through it due to the high number of processes he is running. No matter. He will continue.

 At the eightieth hour, he receives a concerned message from Simon while he is operating on a stabbing victim. The knife penetrated into the victim’s small bowel and it is a race against time to repair the damage. He manages to send Simon a quick reassuring message that yes he is fine, but will not be able to come home for some time yet. Dr Fitzpatrick had said four days but he knows it will not be four days. He will need longer because the humans will need longer. It is alright. He is an RK900, CyberLife’s latest cutting edge android. He can manage.

As predicted, Dr Fitzpatrick does not return after four days. No matter. Ronan powers on, temporarily rotating out the last of the human nurses as a precautionary measure as a surge of new influenza patients floods the hospital. Humans are woefully unprepared for the season due to a lot of factors, be they socio-economic or just plain ignorance. There was a pandemic his father lived through, with many wild tales of humans simply ignoring even the basic, primitive safety measures attempted. It does not surprise Ronan to see so many victims this season either, given all that Hank has told him about those ‘unprecedented times’. 

There is no time to stand under the charging bay downlights. There has been a shooting and there are multiple victims en route to the hospital. And hours before that, there had been a multi vehicle crash on the highway. And hours before that, there was a case of food poisoning at a children’s party which meant Ronan had to call the paediatric registrar for extra help. There is never a good time, and so he has to be conservative about power usage to ensure he can still handle the workload safely. 

“Your hair is white.” One of the nurses whisper to him as they’re scrubbing up for yet another surgery. Ah. His stress levels must be high. He hasn’t checked- he turned off his notifications ten hours ago. 

“I am functioning adequately. It is only cosmetic.” He reassures them with words, and he’s glad there’s a mask over his mouth because he hasn’t quite mastered how to give reassuring smiles to match. 

“You’ve been on call for five days, nearly six now.” They’re brows crease in concern and beneath their mask Ronan knows they are frowning. “You’ve given all of us an hour break every eight hours to ensure we have enough time to charge adequately. You’ve done this for all android staff except yourself!”

“There is no other android qualified for surgery.” He reminds them, flicking through the patient’s stats and passing them on to the surgical team. “So I cannot rest.”

On the first surgery on his sixth consecutive day as the trauma surgeon on call, Ronan finds that the bulbs in the surgical downlights have been replaced with UV charging lights. The same nurse who raised concerns earlier gives him a somewhat stern, no-nonsense look.

“So you can charge while you operate.” A compromise, he realises, and a very kind one too. He gets to work, and he feels the tension unwind from his shoulders, his battery core soaking up the charge as the lights bear down on him. It’s not quite stasis, not quite reprieve from the onslaught of duties, but it’s close.

**

“Simon?” Dr Anthea looks up from her tablet, blinking in surprise as the Jericho leader stands in the doorway of her office. “What can I do for you?”

“Ronan is still at Detroit Metro.” The PL600 chews his bottom lip, wringing his hands together anxiously. “It’s been six whole days straight and he stopped answering my messages on the fourth day.”

“Yes he’s temporarily removed himself from our roster to manage Detroit Metro ED while the human staff recover from the flu.” She sighs, shaking her head. “He’s very much like you, you know: he’ll work himself ragged for the sake of others.” Not quite the answer Simon hopes to hear, she’s sure, but it’s the one she’s giving because she’s right. She’s heard the tales from Professor Joshua. She knows during Jericho’s early stage, Simon nearly died keeping everyone safe and functioning. 

“I just- I’ve left so many messages at reception and though the receptionist assures me she’s passed them on, I can’t help but feel like he literally won’t stop unless he’s physically unable to keep working.” Simon gives her a pained look to which she can only reply with a cocked brow.

“Like you, Simon?”

“Well- alright, yes, like me!” Simon huffs, and it coaxes a laugh from her as the PL600 looks torn between embarrassment and determination. “You are the only android surgeon still qualified to work at human hospitals. To work at that human hospital.” He says it quietly, with caution, because they both know that was a different part of her life. Not an unpleasant one, definitely not, given she deviated out of empathy, out of kindness, but still a different chapter now put behind her. She has the qualifications because she never bothered to give them up like the other medroids. Sentimentality, perhaps, because Detroit Metro had been her home for so very long and to still see a valid ID badge gives her a little spark of joy whenever she opens her drawer. 

“Please?” Simon of the Jericho Four is pleading with her and she knows she cannot deny him a single thing, lovely and courageous and prone to martyrdom as he is.

*

It’s been eight days, twice the number of days she thought she’d need, but she’s feeling strong and healthy and definitely not weighed down by any symptoms anymore. Damn that android and his perceptive, persuasive ways. She both hates and loves how he’d been right, and yes he’s been running an incredibly tight ship here in her absence, though she wonders which other staff he’s rostered on to replace him because obviously he hasn’t been working the entire eight days straight. Right? Surely not. Obviously not. She warned him she’d be Very Cross if he worked more than four days. 

“Nicola?” She turns at the voice and there, right there is Medroid Anthea. The surgeon she shoved into an ambulance with as many android nurses as she could find when racing through the unit after that horrible announcement androids had to be surrendered to the police. Not on her watch, no damn way. 

“Anthea.” She smiles, though a little puzzled. “What are you doing here?”

“Well, you’ve worn my best surgeon down to his bones here so I’m coming back as a favour, just so he gets rest.” There’s a pause as she lets that sink in.

“Are you telling me Ronan’s been here the entire time?! All eight days?!” She nearly explodes with anger and Anthea cocks a perfectly arched brow in that gesture she hasn’t realised she’s missed seeing so much. They made such a great team.

“Why do you sound like you didn’t know this?”

“Because I didn’t! I’ve been on sick leave, recovering from the flu! Oh that boy, honestly!”

“Simon’s here to drag him home, and I’m here for his shift.” Anthea smiles as she clips her ID onto her scrubs. “Just like old times?”

She’s smiling so hard her cheeks ache. “Yeah. Just like old times.”

* 

Simon can’t even stay angry with him. The anger just seeps out of him the moment he sees how exhausted Ronan looks, his hair stark white meaning his stress levels are at their peak given the weather isn’t cold enough to activate his tundra camouflage. He’d demanded his stats and the RK900 had given them with great embarrassment and Simon realised he’d been so very close to just shutting down to conserve what pitiful charge he had left. Honestly.

“You’re mad at me.” Ronan says quietly as Simon ushers him inside the apartment.

“I was.” Simon hangs up their coats before wrapping his arms around his waist and pressing his cheek to his chest. “Couldn’t stay mad, though. I know why you did it.”

“I had to help.”

“I know, love. I know.” Simon sighs, looking up at him fondly. “Because you’re a good, kind person and a wonderful colleague.”

Ronan says nothing, only offers a small smile before leaning down to bump his nose against his fondly.

“Right.” Simon declares with a nod, stepping back, grabbing his wrist and tugging him to their bedroom. “I’m putting you under the lights for a six hour charge and you are not leaving the bed a second earlier.”

“Yes, doctor.” Ronan smiles tiredly, pausing only to press their lips together in quiet gratitude before he lays down and closes his eyes. 

[creamybeemovie69]

Bc @clanwarrior-tumbly made a sappy post about Shawn x Anti I now gotta do my own cuz they’re adorable and soft and I love them

They literally first started talking bc Shawn has incredible aim due to having really steady hands and anti walked in on him throwing darts and a picture of Joey Drew

Anti respects the fact that Shawn will always put JJ first

Anti’s polyamorous panromantic/ Pansexual and Shawn’s a poly gay boi

Good lORD the gay jokes between these two

They have nights were they just sit on the bed drawing

This doesn’t bc Anti can’t draw

But he’s trying

Really hard

They’re both very bad tempered but Shawn definitely takes the crown

After they overcome their stubbornness and temper moments they’re actually pretty chill around eachother

Only Anti knows about Shawn collapsing and stuff when JJ was younger and Shawn made him promise not to tell JJ

After Henry got all the others out of the studio him, Shawn, Thomas and Allison were the only ones that knew what happened

So Wally wasn’t aware that him and Shawn weren’t technically together anymore

Shawn has to explain to Wally what happened, and as much as it hurt them both they figured there’d be better off this way, as Shawn couldn’t find it in him to deal with the fact that Wally doesnt remember what happened afterwards

It hurt Anti a lot because Shawn grew even more distant from him then, and he thought he wanted to be with Wally more than him, but it was really because Shawn was scared to get so attached again, as everyone he loves seems to leave him

Travis ran away, his mum died, JJ, Jack Hunter and William went off to war, celine and Damien went to Canada and then he lost Thomas, Grant, Lacie and Wally in the studio and it seemed to only then click with him that he really couldn’t keep anything good

Anti isn’t good with words, so (ironically, the guy who can’t talk) JJ had to explain to him that he’s got him, Thomas and Lacie back now, and that he was scared of a relationship with Wally, which is why it took so long for them to get ‘married’ and why they didn’t get to do all the stuff they wanted to do when they had the time

That’s when Shawn finally takes off his wedding ring

Anti is surprisingly cuddly? Shawn prefers his space so it kind of results in Shawn’s hand on his shoulder and Anti cuddling up to it in ridiculous ways when they sleep

Anti just kind of picks Shawn up and puts him down whenever he feels like it, just because he can and it’s funny picking up someone twice your size effortlessly. Ask JJ. He does it too.

I’ve mentioned before that literally all the Flynn’s (and one Jackson) are ridiculously tall and all well above 6 foot. Trevor was 6.5, Travis was 6.10, Shawn’s 6.7 and JJ’s 6.4

Very very tol bois

(Anti loves it bc he gets piggy backs and gets carried everywhere and definitely has a size kink)

Shawn’s not really as old fashioned as JJ’s for some reason, despite Shawn being a 20s boi and JJ being a 30s-40s boi

I mean like he doesn’t get modern technology (which is great because his bfs a glitch) and really the only one he gets is a digital drawing tablet because he practically drooled over the idea of not running out of art supplies and he still balls to the wall talks in all forms of indecipherable 20s slang but he’s not really traditional, so things like PDA and their first time weren’t really as awkward as Anti thought they’d be

Despite Shawn not really making plushies anymore Anti still has a shit ton of plushies Shawn’s made

They don’t argue? They kind of got past that bit at the beginning

Although Anti still has a hard time dealing with Shawn’s constant nightmares, episodes, etc. Bc JJ’s the only one who can calm him down from them

He’s not really jealous, but he hates the fact that he can’t help Shawn when he gets like that. He’s still grateful someone can though

Shawn actively seeks Anti out afterwards though

They didn’t really sleep in the same bed for a while because JJ and Shawn shared a bed for so long

Anti’s a slacker. Any task he gets is done quickly and he’s done a half arsed job of it, so the fact that Shawn’s a workaholic drives him insane

He doesn’t understand until Shawn explains the whole “yeah I pretty much died for JJ when I was 18” situation and he figured out it’s more a bad habit than a need to get things done

Anti will not leave the room in the morning until he looks gorgeous. He just won’t have it. So Shawn walking out the room in a half buttoned dress shirt and paint stained slacks with no attempt to comb his hair drives him n u t s

JJ and Anti rant about Shawn’s lack of presentability

He doesn’t know it bc I mean he can’t hear anything but Shawn has a really pretty singing voice that Anti adores

Anti only ever hears it if he’s standing outside the door listening to him sing while he works or when he sings in sleep, so he purposefully stays up to hear it most nights

Late night conversations don’t happen because Shawn hasn’t spoken the language since he was 9 yet still struggles holding a sentence in English not Irish.

He also talks in his sleep, but again it’s in Irish so Anti doesn’t understand it

It still results in Anti answering back like “really?” “Sounds interesting” “what happened then?” And things like that and he normally gets a response

Sometimes Anti has random moments were he apologises over and over and over about what he did to JJ in his power hour to Shawn but Shawn’s not good with words so he’s like “are you fucking serious? It’s JJ, if he cared that much, he’d break everything that’s breakable in your body and then some.” And Anti’s like “oh shit yeah” and that’s it

I made no attempt at keeping this short and I don’t care :)

[vaporwavepan]

2018: a review.

Holy

Shitsticks.

I--I SURVIVED 2018?!?!

Wh A--

Anyway, seriously! This year has been literally insane. I have gone through hell and back this year, I have struggled with my depression, major art block, and just a lot of stress. BUT, there has been far many more pluses in this year that far outweigh such negativity. Let's start through the most memorable things from some of the months in this year:

January 2018:

In the beginning of January, I had met people through a roleplay server, I gained friends, and lost some as I moved on. A little later, I then had joined a JSE server where I made all new friends! I then also joined another server which leads to....

February 2018:

In February, I started interacting with more people in said new server, and I reuinited with a familiar face in the process (the one who would become my bf, the love of my life), and he actually became my best friend. And someone who I would start to confide in a lot and bond with practically 24/7. I would also eventually become a dev member of one of the best teams @power-of-friends-games and help work on the JSE fangame Septiscape!!!!

March 2018:

This was the month I had made my very first ARG called Taken, and this would also be the month that I would eventually confess to my said Best friend. And of course, he said yes!

April 2018-July 2018:

The next months from April through July would be tough, at this time, a falling out would happen, but through all of that, I found more of myself, and I recovered from a lot of stress and depression and most importantly; I had my friends right there with me and I got even closer to a lot of my friends.

August 2018:

This was the month that my boyfriend and I got right back together, and it was the most amazing feeling in the whole universe. And it was the month we were both definitely a lot better. This month was my bitch and I loved it!

September 2018-December 2018:

These months until December were still bumpy, but mostly amazing. Nothing huge or grand happened except this month in December, I am now able to finally start making my own game with my own dev team, and I am able to do digital art like never before thanks to the gift of my new drawing tablet ^^

But overall..now I run an amazing JSE server @jse-community-and-friends-server

I have all my friends by my side, new friends and old friends!

And of course..I have my most amazing boyfriend that I could EVER ask for @gridhorizon who I am so happy and grateful for. I am so excited I get to walk into 2019 with someone who has done nothing but supported me and brought absolute joy and happiness into my life despite the fact that I struggled a lot this year too. Baby, if you're reading this, I love you with all of my entire soul! Let's kick 2019's Ass :3c

and I just...I can't believe I've made it..

HELL YEAH BOIS

[celticbotanart]

SO I GOT THIS QUESTION ON MY SEA WITCH VIDEO, AND SINCE I’VE BEEN RECEIVING QUESTIONS LIKE THIS A LOT, I THOUGHT IT WOULD BE IMPORTANT TO SHARE MY ANSWERS HERE AS WELL. Question: " it's a shame how I want to be a an artist and I cant even draw this good and I don't even know or have all the tools... I just don't feel like I'm ever going to be an artist. Any tips?? how come I don't have all the tools?? I only have like 10... how many years have you be been drawing in paint tool sai??? I'm only 15, and did you take classes or are self-taught???? srry for a the questions ... I'm just trying to find hope and motivation 😔“ 

*** Well, first of all, that mentality  of "I'll never be a good artist" mindset has to go away. Being good at art is rarely about someone's natural skill and much more about years and years of practice. I didn't even dream I would be able to paint such a portrait when I was 15 myself (I am 27 now, so you can already see where I am going with this). So please, don't think it is "shameful" you can't draw like that yet when I didn't draw like that when I was your age, lol. Some teens can paint and draw insanely good - examples: Kiwi Byrd, Tamberella, Sara Teppes, they aren't teens anymore but they are currently like 19 or 20 and they've been posting art for years now. They are exceptions or they simply perceive/absorb art skills  differently, but you can see they are ALWAYS drawing and posting something, from a sketch to a full painting, they are always producing art, which of course, speeds their improvement a lot. I will ALWAYS show and link this to people, because more than anything I want to de-romanticize and un-mistify this idea that art is 1- easy (it is not, no matter what it may seem or how some people might be quicker to learn it, it is still hard to learn new tecniques and styles and to study art) and 2- that art is absolutely impossible to improve: THIS IS MY IMPROVEMENT MEME CHART THAT COVERS FROM 2003 to 2016.  As you can see, at your age I literally drew some anime-style characters and fanarts, most based out of something else (like the Amy Lee manga portrait, it was referenced on one of Amy's most famous promo pictures). I only started with digital art when I was sixteen and only got a tablet pen (a Wacom Bamboo Fun small) three years later when I was 19. Tools are helpful, but when you are a beginner, they don't really matter to be quite honest. I mastered watercolors  by constantly practicing with the cheapest, worst quality watercolors and nankin ink you can ever imagine from the age of 14. They were literally school / tools for children quality. That Amy Lee I mentioned earlier on my chart was all done with ballpoint pen. And to this day, ballpoint pens are one of my absolute favorite materials do draw with because they are cheap, simple and we can achieve awesome effects and textures with them. They were all done recently with only common ballpoint pens: 

If your foundations aren't good in drawing, your art won't look good no matter how many tools you have and no matter how expensive they are, the art will still look bad. If you can make wonders with cheap-ass materials, you will be fine in any situation. If you have 10 tools (I guess they are commons stuff like pens, pencils, colored pencils?) you already have a very good start. I've been drawing on Paint Tool SAI since 2009, which means this year will be 8 years of using the software. 

This was literally my first attempt on Paint Tool SAI, in 2009:

This was one of my latest paintings with the same software, made last month:

On the other hand, I still use a Bamboo Pen small tablet, which is a good one but far from what you would call "the best" tablet; again, remember what I said up there - try to work with what you have in your hands. Sometimes upgrades will have to be necessary for you to improve, for example, you can't improve at playing the violin if your violin is a cheap/beginner violin because in that skill, the quality of the instrument counts a lot for the quality of sound you will get. Art supplies work more or less the same way, but unlike the violin, it is not a deal breaker if you have cheaper stuff or if the quality is inferior.  I've taken a few classes / attended a few fast courses because these are super expensive here in Brazil where I live. But I was once an apprentice of this dude who had a painting studio near where I live. It last only a few months, I had to stop attending due to many reasons, oil paintings not really being one of the easiest materials to deal with being one of them, BUT I still learned a great deal on traditional painting which I use to this very day on my digital art. Another tip would be exactly that - try watching traditional oil painting videos, they have great techniques and tips that can easily be applied on digital (my favorite is Andrew Tischler's channel, his videos are dynamic and his technique is insanely good). Observing old paintings that you might like also help a lot (my favorite painter is by far William Bouguereau, I've been observing his art since 2009, and I try to apply what I see in his works on mine). 

However, I would say I am mostly self taught - and by that I mean I read and watched a ridiculous amount of tutorials online, from deviantart and on youtube, and whenever I see a tutorial I stop to at least take a look. Don't judge tutorials by the quality of the art being presented in it, I've learned A LOT about SAI by reading tutorials and watching speedpaints on YT of what would be considered "bad anime art" or just "weaboo anime art". Since learning art can be tough and you can get really unmotivated and bored, draw whatever you want: fanarts, OC's, animals, landscapes, it doesnt matter as long as you like it. You can see on my improvement chart that 90% of stuff in there is fanart. It has its cons (for example, people can take the longest time to recognize your original art or not pay attention to it at all, like it still happens to me) but it definitely has its pros as well.  Also, I am very good at drawing faces and characters (hence this only took me 3h to paint, i've been painting faces since ever and they are one of my favorite things to paint), but I am extremely bad at drawing and painting backgrounds. They can come out looking nice, but I still can't paint just anything (for example, I can paint a forest decently, but I can't paint a city scape with buildings and such). My backgrounds are often very limited, simple and / or just suggested (like in my recent "Goblin" video, the forest behind him is only suggested, but it is enough to convey the message). I should practice more on BG's, but I don't lol. So don't be like me on that, haha. Long story short: - art is hard and takes a long time to learn and to improve, it is completely normal to take time to improve; - don't be fooled by the illusion of expensive art supplies = good art. Work with what you have at hands, try different tools and  supplies and see what suits you the best; - read read read read read tutorials and watch as many YT speedpaints and tutorials you can. Even if they are long, even if they seem they won't add you anything new or good. - draw a lot, and draw what you enjoy. I hope this was somehow helpful!