#this isnt worth posting actually

[birdricks]

the final phrase of my last sentence / hangs in the air, sounding stupider and stupider

[mastersoftheair]

on the point of including black people in the show (or any period show), a lot of the outrage can sometimes come across as performative to me. it's one thing to feel upset about how little screentime black characters get compared to white characters (a valid criticism, believe me, I Know! give me an hour and i could talk your ear off about how this constantly annoys me as a black person who's damned to enjoy period pieces), but it's another to Only get upset while not actually creating content for said black characters, Especially when fandom (not just hbo war, but in general) is famous for taking Extremely minor characters and creating entire worlds with them, to the point where you wouldn't know they're minor characters at all until you check out the source yourself. richard macon, alexander jefferson, and robert daniels each have only 20 or less posts about them (at the time of publishing this post). in my own fandom experience (within fandoms both big and small and old and new, whatever), i've seen more content (posts, art pieces, analyses, fics, etc) made for minor white characters in less than a mere week's time (it's not a competiton lol i'm just giving a perspective here). so idk. obviously, there's nothing anyone here can do about a show that's already been filmed and released. we got what we got. thas it. at least in the great wide world of fandom, you can actually do something about it, turning the big into small. there's precedent for that. otherwise it just feels like complaining for the sake of complaining

[kookidough]

analysing vance hopper because he lives in my head 24/7 !

tw for like. literally everything the black phone covers!!!!!!

also there's some special effects gore rather far down in the post idk just i feel like i should warn you just in case

okay so before anyones like "but bee!!!! he only had 6 minutes of screen time in a 102 minute long movie!!!!! he was only on screen for 5.8% of the movie!!!!!" and to that i say i Know it was a real tragedy so a lot of this will be built on personal interpretation and subtext and stuff said behind the scenes and whatnot

so firstly i wanna rot about what his childhood/upbringing might've been like..... i havent quite decided on something definitive but i think we can take one look at his character and realise that is glaringly obvious he had a bad childhood, in one interview the actor that plays him (brady hepner) says "the background i had set up for vance is that the reason he was the way he was is his home life was fairly difficult, you know maybe his dad was either not there for him or he wasn't supportive, maybe he was fairly abusive, and so that creates a hair trigger sense of rage in vance" hair trigger meaning his patience is literally as thin as a strand of hair it does Not take a lot for him to snap

there more to it after that which i'll get into soon but yea thats the gist of it it's clear he had absent/neglectful/abusive parents and that would certainly contribute to why he's so angry all the time, maybe acting so explosive was the only way to get his parents' attention, either good or bad, so he just internalised that. obviously rage and anger issues like vance's lead to violence (not in all cases but in his case it does) and i think a neglectful and abusive upbringing would obviously expose him to more violence than a normal childhood would, therefore normalising it and desensitising him to it, whether he's seeing it play out in his own home and/or on television or something like that (because i doubt his parents would be the kind to monitor what content he's viewing)

i feel like he has little control over his life and that only adds to his anger, which in his case leads to a fight when his buttons are pushed too many times. i think he probably takes great pride in being the toughest in town and whatnot and winning fights and being perceived as strong and scary is good to him and helps him regain control/power, something he doesnt have at home. the rest of the quote from the interview i mentioned earlier states "this pinball machine could have been the only thing that he has in his heart that's like, good, like 'holy cow i did this, i set the score,' so when someone comes along and messes it up for him, it takes away the only thing that he has. i think that that's when he switches to a 'now you're gonna pay for that'"

similar to what i said about fighting, the pinball machine and his high score is something he has control over and its an important part of his reputation/image like. hes literally pinball vance ! and the whole thing about that high score being the "only thing he has in his heart that's good" implies that hes. well. pretty shit at everything else, which is pretty much canon if you remember that gwen said vance was held back twice in school. makes me think that while he's not the brightest in school he's certainly street smart

moving onto ermmmmm him getting kidnapped era because im sure youre wondering "well bee if he's so street smart then why did he get kidnapped" so may i raise two theories (this is. literally all i got and its not even concrete, me and my friend gray (@staggersz) tried to figure out how this could even happen and this is the most plausible thing we've got. so shoutout to him real quick he has had to deal with me being unnormal about vance for like a year and a half thanks king couldnt have done all this without my rotting buddy)

so either he got taken by surprise (most likely option) or vance's trust was gained first via getting given quarters at the pinball machine and small talk and shit like that but this is unlikely because i feel like it'd take a loooooong time for someone like vance to trust a some random stranger adult man when he clearly has issues with trusting and respecting people older than him and people with authority (e.g. cops, his parents, or school officials) so yea being taken by surprise would probably be the most realistic option, i always see people on tiktok being like "how did the grabber kidnap vance hes so strong!!!!" dude its a 15 year old boy against like. a 45 year old man who's already claimed two lives its really not gonna be a fair fight here

before i get into the next part i wanna quickly address a theory i absolutely Hate and it is so easily disproven and that is the theory that vance is the grabber's son or is related to him in some other way and i see it Far too often on tiktok and i HATE it. from what ive seen this all stems from his dream sequence where he kicks open the fence to albert's house and, presumably, goes inside after being dropped off by the police after the grab n go fight. idk if some people just straight up didnt realise this but clearly in real life he is going to his Own House??? in the dream it's only albert's house because this is how he chooses to show gwen the house she's trying to find her brother in, the house that he himself was killed in??? i hate the theory i hate it sm

the dream sequence itself is interesting though as the ghosts seem to only be able to conjure up what theyve seen in real life (like how bruce can picture the outside of the house and show that to gwen but the house number is all flipped and not right beause he doesnt know it) so vance being able to picture the house and the number and the gate and every detail would imply that hes seen it before, but im going to explain that away as either he got out once before like with finney's failed escape attempt, or the house is most likely on the route he walks to school or the grab n go or something and he hasnt actually been there prior to being kidnapped

mini rant over now onto being kidnapped i guess, so i used the missing posters to try and estimate a timeline of how long each ghost boy would've been in the basement for (although the missing posters are notoriously unreliable for details such as looks/height/age/etc, the dates seem to all line up). so we know the order is griffin, billy, vance, bruce, robin, finney, right?? if we use the poster date then billy was taken on may 4th, 1976, a month and two days after griffin was taken (april 2nd 1976). vance was taken on september 23rd 1977, almost a full year later (stay with me im going somewhere with this), and after that bruce was taken on july 18th 1978, again almost a full year later

its established in the movie that the grabber stalks his victims before he takes them (canon because we literally see the van watching finney and gwen as they walk home from school early on in the movie) but we dont know how long he does this for since griffin/billy and robin/finney were taken such short distances apart and then the others were taken such long distances apart, also it's possible he could stalk his next victim while the previous one is still alive, etc etc lots of confusing factors, but if i've done the maths right then the absolute maximum time vance could've spent down there is 9 months and 25 days, or 298 days, so erm . let that sink in !

howeverrrr in the movie gwen states that vance went missing "last spring" and september is definitely not in spring, meaning he could've been down there for a year or even longer. an explanation or excuse i could think of for the movie and the missing poster saying different things (other than the missing posters being known for some areas being wildly inaccurate) is that maybe he was taken in spring but wasnt labelled as officially missing until september, when he was properly linked to griffin and billy's similar disappearances and the mysterious grabber? i can imagine it'd be very easy for law enforcement, especially in the 70s, to dismiss someone like vance as a runaway until they get solid evidence that he was taken. idk though thats just my personal excuse / angsty headcanon for the difference in information

not sure what exactly killed him but we do hear from vance himself that "he took his time with me" so it was probably blood loss from a variety of injuries, if we look at him in his ghost scenes we can see his hair is absolutely covered in blood which indicates head injury, he clearly has a broken nose and bruising around his eyes as a result of it, he has these deep cuts on his abdomen area (apologies for the image quality but i believe they're like. sfx pieces you would wear under clothing)

and he also has just like. minor bruising (like the fingerprints on his arm) and other random blood splatters on his face and neck (assuming the blood down his neck comes from wherever he was bleeding on his head) so Yeah overall very unpleasant way to die obviously

okay now the part thats actually in the movie and it only took me 13 paragraphs to get here: vance as a ghost!! first thing i wanna point out is appearance wise i just want to say that when he's a ghost he's missing his choker and that fact Pains me. anyway personality-wise i feel like being violently murdered has, understandably, kicked his rage up to like. the highest level it could possibly go. he's insanely snarky and downright rude to finney on the phone, showing no empathy to the fact that finney is literally in the exact situation he was in

i feel like the whole "this is the nightmare end of your pathetic little life" and "if you knew what you had coming, you'd be fucking terrified" thing is definitely to scare finney on purpose and to get him to do something, vance might as well have just told him he's never going home cuz thats how it came across LMAOO, it is startling though because vance is clearly speaking from experience, that he was literally fucking terrified, and he is warning finney in his own weird way

the thing i think sets vance apart from the other ghosts is that while he does help finney, he does it for a different reason than they do. the other ghosts want finney to escape, to get out, to be free, to live, but personally i dont think vance cares about that. the only thing he wants is for albert shaw to be dead, for someone to seek vengeance, to do what vance couldn't. vance doesn't care if it's bruce or robin or finney or whatever boy could've come after that, he doesnt care as long as that man gets what he deserves after what he put vance through, and i see this through the scene at the end of vance's call where finney thanks him for his help and vance says, and i quote, "helping you? this isn't about you, fuck him! and apologies for being repetitive but to me it just literally proves that to vance, this isnt about finney or his escape, its just about revenge

we dont get to find out what happens to the ghosts once the credits have rolled, and i dont think we quite know enough about tbp's version of ghosts to guess what theyre up to, but i have a few theories :3 maybe theyre no longer bound to those two houses and they can now go anywhere they want in town? or maybe since their shared goal of stopping albert has been achieved, the ghosts can finally pass on to whatever is waiting for them next. i dont think vance would be content to pass on that quickly or easily as anger lingers, but i hope he'd be able to let go of it eventually, and hey we might find out in the sequel. i pray it mentions him cuz i will just die if it doesnt

sometimes, ok thats a lie, frequently i think about an au where he survived or escaped or whatever but ohhhh boy this post is already a train wreck so that au would deserve its own essay of a post :3 if u actually genuinely read this far then Wtf thanks for reading the ramblings of an absolute madman, only pure delusion could get like 20 paragraphs about a guy with 6 minutes screentime but hey thats how i roll, thanks again to my pal gray for letting me rot and thank u to my other pal ana for also enduring all this rot

hope u enjoyed my interpretation of vance hopper im going to crawl in a hole now and probably brainrot some more, thanks again for ur time :3

[obihoe]

i think its so crazy the way having power as a shinobi always seems to be such a double edged sword on naruto. like on one hand, u need it, its a tool for survival and it earns u respect from ur peers. but on the other .. it can also lead to the exact opposite. if u have too much power it can lead (or contribute) to isolation and becoming ostracized from ur community bc it makes people fearful of u .. this is applicable to madara i think and to naruto and gaara as well. madara isnt ostracized only bc of his power, it is also his lack of skill in forming bonds bc he has trust problems but his power is a major contributing factor. he is feared for his power (but also admired) and the more he gets isolated, the more he starts building his own identity around it as well and starts thinking its the only thing valuable abt himself. naruto as well is feared for his power as a jinchuuriki even tho he is also a bit of a special case since its only the grownups that know abt this so his peers ... they ostracize him for the opposite thing. he's a failure at the academy and a difficult learner so he gets no respect. it is only when he starts gaining more power (or controlling it better) and using it for the sake of the village that he gets everyone's respect and acknowledgement. he's a hero even all of a sudden. but gaara is an even more extreme case. gaara is also a jinchuuriki and he's ostracized for it to such an extent that he does not get to build bonds at all and in a bit similar fashion to madara starts self-identifying only over his power. both him and madara end up consumed by their power but while madara decides to use it for the sake of saving the world, gaara just fully decides to just live for himself, fight for himself and love only himself ... madara also becomes a bit self-absorbed but its not something he does purposefully i think. gaara just goes, well, everyone fears me and despises me anyway, so i might as well give them a reason. my only purpose in this world is to kill ... i have no other reason to live. i forgot where i was going with this but .. something something isolation, objectification and dehumanization from others on account of ur power and it leads to the person internalizing it and seeing themselves also as either below or above being human .. madara perceives himself to be above it, he develops a god complex and comes to think that he is the messiah who will solve the world's problems (with power) and gaara seems to perceive himself to be beneath it .. as a tool and a servant. both to his village and to the bloodthirsty voices he hears in his head.

[foxgirltail]

Palworld critiques are looking more and more like Tumblr call-out posts they're all like

Long, drawn out, effective non-issue with several sources/instances

Another non-issue

This one is actually of substance and should be the main point, but it's buried by minor issues of little consequence

Another non-issue

[nerosdayinanime]

"BECAUSE YOURE WORTH SOMETHING!" "THEN I DONT WANT TO BE WORTH SOMETHING! AND ESPECIALLY NOT TO YOU!" "WHATS THAT SUPPOSED TO MEAN!?" "EXACTLY WHAT I FUCKING SAID!" Giyuu stared down at him, contempt rising in his expression- but Sabito could feel the hurt behind the anger, both boiling over into a moment of shock. Pain bloomed on his cheek as his head was knocked sideways, he snarled and struck back- yelling vaguely filled his ears aside the pounding of his own heart. His throat hurt though he couldnt hear his own screaming over the adrenaline and tension, it-  ..it hurt. His cheek, forehead, he could taste blood- but what hurt the most was seeing the same on Giyuu. That he was inflicting. The same pain in his eyes he knew his own echoed. All of it a desperate plea, their bared teeth and glares wavering for a moment.

--

"What happened to Tomioka-san and Urokodaki-san?" "They got in a fight." "They did..? Why are they holding hands?" "They get upset when they fight." "Uwaa.... Thats so cute!" "I dont think Urokodaki-san's busted lip is very cute, nor Tomioka's black eye, Kanroji-san." "Ah!! I didn't mean it like that!-" 

(Sabito gently smoothed his thumb over previously bloodied knuckles, since patched up and cleaned. He felt Giyuu's hand tighten around his own, resolved and firm. He huffed a sigh and rested his head in his other hand, the ache subsiding.)

[jesse-cosay]

Wanted to draw vent art and this wasn't what I meant to make at ALL. Lake getting pulled into a mirror maybe(?)

[frankiistein]

i should find people to promote breadavota to because who else will ship the funny little jpegs together. should i appeal to the para and transid communities cuz i just realized that the story having "living" as a legal and social status instead of a strictly biological one and chronicles the different ways characters who identify as one or the other approach "transitioning" is very transid fitting. and paras because at least three of the characters canonically are paras and they aren't evil people for it (they're evil for unrelated reasons /lh)

ft the cast that hits all of the "rly stigmatized identifications" bingo (going to put only canon here, none of my hc's)

bread the mc a doll who tries to transition from non-living to living, she's a collective of 46 "breadlings" and can modify her body based on their own internal body parts. she hates the laws

jacques, loveless schizospec/pd haver objectophile/teratophile dollkin (?) who also identifies as being literally dead. he hates the laws

has some kind of dyadic/commited but non romantic relationship with:

media, a zoophile/erotophonophile who is also like transliving and most of his arc seems to be his internalized shame for all of these because it goes against his reputation as his species's most "ethical" role model which is a title he probably got after usurping god and eating her eye. he wrote the laws. also he hates the laws

reception who considers themself a single person but routinely presents as three people at once (which the rest of their species finds weird). they hate the laws

bon/scarecrow, a demon force-transitioned into becoming "living" before getting exiled when they fail at assimilating into society and curse the nation's records of their years being forced into an entertainment industry. they hate the laws

bien. who loves his dad bon. in all senses of the word (hes my favorite blorbo). okay hes too repressed to hate anything

idk how to describe sar i just need everyone to look at sar at all times. sar makes one's own laws

special mention for vara a snarky ai who is programmed is to split fictives of people she hates apparently /lh

she hates the laws

also just look at the art :3 so pretty

the story truly has it all. blood and gore. toxic doomed yaoi. discussions of disability. speculation on sociocultural constructs of love. being "living" used as an analogy for being an entity worthy of love and being part of society. more toxic doomed yaoi. read breadcomics today

[guideaus]

i do think its really weird how thoughtlessly people will share an offensive joke on here, assuming its meant to be ironic, just because they saw it on their dash from someone theyre following. idk how many times ive seen the url/icon of the op of a post have a dogwhistle, the post is suspicious, but it somehow trends bc queer ppl on here inexplicably think its an innocent joke and a day later a much less popular post goes around informing ppl that the op is a neonazi or smth. it might be a ~chronically online~ thing to check the op, or even catch bad vibes, but i just think its strange

[benevolentscars]

made a Nausicaa skin for minecraft :)

[just-aro]

aphobes choose the weirdest shit to get mad at I swear

[slaythespire]

GUARDS!!!! hes posting abt it again

[shapeshyft]

Hey you don't know me but I see you every now and then on my dash and I really enjoy your posts. Now I saw your apology post for not being that active.

Probably it doesn't matter to hear this from me because again we don't know eachother and we never wrote together. But I still wanted to tell you: Don't feel bad for taking care of yourself. Don't feel bad for taking it slow and easy and to take breaks when you need them. You deserve it! And you deserve people around you who support you and help you feel save and comfortable enough to just say I'm off for a while see you when I'm back. Everyone who doesn't support you in this or who make you feel bad for taking care of yourself doesn't deserve you around them.

You don't own anyone but yourself.

So now I tell you too: Take care of yourself

...God, the worst part of being vulnerable on the timeline is opening myself up to genuine compliments, understanding of the human condition, and camaraderie. This sucks. Can I be super honest with you, babe? This sucks so much for me, I can't accurately portray how hard of a time I'm having reading and re-reading this nice message you've sent me.

YES, FROM A NON-EMOTIONALLY SCARRED PERSPECTIVE, YOU'RE RIGHT! I, and a vast majority of others on this website, need to separate a 'want' to add to the creative stream from their lists of 'needs' when they log in. I know, I know, i know! There's no good can come from being harsh on yourself, or even from sitting down and making a post apologizing for being harsh on yourself. I know.

But, and I think this is a very salient point on my side of this argument, shut the hell your mouth!

[trainingdummyrabbit]

Hey, I know you're a Projmoon fan, I guess I'm curious because I'm at an impasse on what to do rn, did you play through the entirety of Lobotomy Corporation, did you just skip it entirely for Ruina, or did you read a summary/watch a cutscene compilation or let's play/something else? And what would you recommend as an approach? I've tried playing through Lobcorp but it's just extremely tedious and I'm considering skipping it to get to something I think I'll like more (Ruina)

oh!! ok my answer is a little bit complicated tbh; bc i havent. played any of the series at all. WAHAHA

what i personally did was um. attempt to watch an incomplete lobcorp lp ==> couple months radio silence ==> watched one (1) day of gameplay from a friend (for one boss fight specifically) ==> got recc'd summaries i slowly watched thru ==> couple months radio silence. ==> watched someone else's (actually complete) lp ==> (rabbit hole'd) summaries again.

um. dont do that. JSNBGKHDBK

im not gonna act like i Know how t tackle a series like this (since it took me like 4 circles around to Actually Commit to it (and also im kind of. new. here)) BUT from my personal opinion of the series and how it carries itself, i CAN recc at least Some order of something.

TRY to play Lobcorp! which i can kinda see is already done on your end. its something i Super want to try but absolutely know i wont finish SKJFNKDJF;; the main draw of PLAYING lobcorp is the struggle. it Sucks! its Long and Tedious and the game HATES you... and that's the point! it's plot relevant. it's an experience i didnt get to feel, but can so painfully just Understand by merit of watching someone else do it, only skipping about occasionally. tl;dr: the game loop is Telling A Story, Dragging You In-- THAT is the draw in insisting folks play it. it genuinely makes the... everything... hit that much harder. Once youve given it your best, dont feel ashamed to look for someone who's Done It! (i hear a lot of folks havent completed lobcorp themselves, so ✌) DONT UM . SKIP IT COMPLETELY THOUGH ruina is literally a Direct Sequel to it. i think it does a good enough job at introducing the setting on its own, but i am GRABBING YOU this shit will hit fucking DIFFERENT if you Understand. also its a lovely game worth looking at and appreciating bc GOD what a fucking experience those last few days are. i do not cry that easily to stuff like this but OUGH. AUGH. H

Wonderlab??? its a webcomic thats heavily reccommended you read through, but due to um. circumstances . it doesnt seem t be feasible atm. however, there IS a synopsis up thats pretty darn good! wonderlab, iirc, isn't directly plot relevant, but DOES introduce certain important concepts for ruina. however, it's not Mandatory, as ruina Also explains these things. as far as i know, its just a fun lil kickass story in the universe taking place between series you can look at if you want :)

Play Ruina! or watch, i guess. again, i watched an lp and it kicked the shit out of me emotionally (affectionate) so honestly do what you will here, i suppose.

honestly though, these are both super fucking long-ass and ridiculously heavy games so you're probably gonna be here a while. it took me like two weeks of committed watch time t look into Properly, and that was even when i started skipping straight to cutscenes at the latter half. embrace that! i cant stop you, but id heavily reccommend at the very least watching through the gameplay loop for a good chunk of the time-- giving the story that space really hammers home the... Everything. heavily heavily recc letting it Have that space.

for ruina specifically though, definitely at least watch through the beginning and ending legs of every fight-- and at least a solid chunk of every boss fight. if you're intent on skipping round gameplay loops like i did, imean. watch the boss fights watch the boss fights these fuckers do NOT play around. i cannot applaud these games' soundtracks enough and i wont say anything but trust me trust me trust me.

ANYWAY. here's the stuff that was recc'd to me, personally! if you wanna give watching through the series a go! :]

Lobcorp LP: [x] (Commentated+Completed! I couldn't find any no-commentary ones that were finished, but honestly for its gameplay loop it Helps. Blind on his end, but he does genuinely really like the series so i give it a thumbs up ✌) Ruina LP: [x] (Same guy :] also completed!) Lobcorp SUMMARY: [x] (Brief, but a good opener+summary!) Wonderlab SUMMARY: [x] (It Sure Is Wonderlab!!) Ruina SUMMARY: [x] [x] (Actually incomplete, but goes pretty well in depth and is easy to watch+absorb.) Alt SUMMARY: [x] (Consists of both parts of the duology! I haven't actually watched it in a while so i don't exactly remember much t say about it, but it sure is on my list!)

[savethepinecones]

tomorrows the day im gonna fold all my laundry. like for real this time

[origamiyoda]

time for another night of not drawing and watching VODS from 2 years ago.