#this literally just exists to entertain me

[cat-dragoness]

Reading Castle in the Air out loud to my housemates (pt. 1/?):

(I was going to do one of these for Howl's Moving Castle but forgot and now I can't remember all of my thoughts. Oh well. The main thing I do remember is: If you're thinking of reading HMC out loud, do it.)

My housemates haven't read this book before. I have. This will be entertaining :)

Me: "Just to warn you, this story will start with a completely different cast than HMC had." The housemates: "But what happened to Howl?" Me: "… You'll find out." The housemates: *assorted noises of disappointment*

The flowery, "insults thinly veiled as compliments" manner of talking in that book is so much fun to read aloud. I'm probably making everyone sound more sarcastic than they're actually supposed to sound. But that's fine, because it's fun!

There is an assortment of sighing and groaning over Flower-in-the-Night. To be fair, I forgot how cheesy they kind of are.

I mean, they meet and immediately are in love. Or at least Abdullah is. It might take Flower-in-the-Night until the second night to fall in love (being slightly hung up on her uncertainty that Abdullah is a man at all). I'm not actually going to take issue with this, because I don't want to take issue with it, but it literally takes them twenty-four hours to decide to get married, only a couple of which they even spend together.

On that note though, the housemates found the whole "Flower-in-the-Night doesn't think Abdullah is a man" thing hilarious, which means I found it hilarious.

"But where's Howl?"

Aaaaand everything goes wrong and the housemates are loving it.

(This is about the point when Housemate #3 (who has been less involved in the reading shenanigans) walked in with zero context for any of what was going on, and started looking very concerned.)

Housemates are solidly convinced that Howl is the Ochinstan prince to whom Flower-in-the-Night is betrothed (because of the mention of "the princes of Ochinstan are very hard to pin down"), and I am dying. I'm also refusing to tell them anything about how correct they are (or aren't).

The housemates: "But wait, Howl's married already. [This was the only thing I did tell them, back when we started the book.] He must be lying; he doesn't actually want to marry Flower-in-the-Night." I am still dying.

Also we got to the part where Abdullah is challenging the Sultan to just kill him now (knowing that he won't), and that's where Housemate #2 (who has been a fan of HMC, both movie and book, for some years and is the more vocal about Howl's current absence) declared that she loves this book. I feel accomplished.

That is a great part of the book, though, which I had kind of forgotten about. Abdullah's not challenging Fate (yet), but he is setting the tone for that to come up later.

Abdullah: *realizes the carpet responds well to compliments*. Housemate #2: "He's talking to it like it's Calcifer!" Me: *hurriedly keeps reading before I can start snickering*

The genie: "[The soldier] appeals to me. He shines with dishonesty." The housemates: *gasp* "It's Howl!"

Some time later, while the genie is whining over something: "Maybe the genie is Howl?"

Honestly, they are extremely eager for someone to turn out to be Howl, and it's hilarious.

It's also even more funny for me, because there are so many hints about who everyone is, but also there's like five million side comments that just make you think of Howl. I haven't read this book in long enough that I forgot just how many there are.

Housemate #1: "Wait, the soldier doesn't have a name?"

Which is true, and I technically remembered that, and I want to come up with reasons why that could have tipped the reader off to the soldier being more than he seems, but it's not quite coming together right now.

Current running theory is that Midnight is actually Flower-in-the-Night, since Midnight is obviously more sentient than an average cat. I am refusing to confirm or deny anything.

[peribirb]

sick to bastard death of myself if I'm being honest

[monty-glasses-roxy]

Okay so that AU based on Plex History stuff and the song the Horse and the Infant from Epic the Musical?

It's a medieval fantasy style AU, with magic, gods, kingdoms, and fucked monarchies. Bonnie is the prince of a kingdom who becomes friends with Roxy, a wolf from a northern town in the middle of nowhere. He and his father are considered very close to the gods and have been visited and guided by them many a time before. Meanwhile, Roxy was found nearly dead on a riverbank when she was a very small puppy and was adopted by Music Man. She was raised like her siblings (the Minis) by Music Man and the local community, is the best horse racer in the Northern regions and has nothing to do with the known gods ever outside of her regular education.

They meet at Roxy's first horse race in the South that just so happens to be in Bonnie's kingdom and the one he's also competing in. While all the other competitors recognise Bonnie either by name or face, Roxy doesn't have a god damn clue who this guy is and that throws Bonnie so off guard that they end up being friends.

However, since winning the race, Roxy has started to be visited in her dreams by a green, rabbit-looking god. He tells her very little she understands and honestly she doesn't care about this guy at all or what this "destiny" bullshit he keeps going on about is. Bonnie on the other hand, is receiving a few vague warnings not to trust his new friend, but don't exactly tell him why so he's not really sure what to make of it. But... well his father has been acting a bit weird lately... like he's afraid of something, almost seeming paranoid about some sort of attack on the kingdom... Weird...

So anyway, he hangs out with Roxy some more! I'm not sure how to approach the next part of the plot as there's a lot of options here, but basically, he goes on a trip with Roxy and their mutual friends to a kingdom his father defeated when he was little. They also find out what kind of atrocities he and his men committed there and what the fuck that has to do with Roxy, which, if you know the song I'm talking about you can probably make a pretty good guess where I'm going with this. Oh and also the place is crazy haunted and the ghosts all have it out for Bonnie specifically.

For those that don't know the song, the gods (Glitchtrap/Afton/Whoever) pressured and manipulated Bonnie's father into killing the baby of the royals he'd just killed in war. Except in this case, they didn't check the baby puppy was actually fucking dead before they moved on and forgot about her... until she showed up again in the kingdom they like fucking with the most. And makes friends with her would-be murderer's son with seemingly absolutely no knowledge of any of this shit.

But uhhh yeah this is basically a story about gods playing dolls with mortals and the consequences that has on them. And Old Man Consequences is there. He gets to be very cool here.

[exileorexodus]

Today on Shen’s hot takes: today, rivalsduo, and dream (as like. just a guy. )

Look man I’m mentally incapable of seeing a mf as just a mf. All content creators are literally just guys, holding them on “can do no wrong” idolization puritan pedestals is just a gambit set to fail. I loved techno dearly but I didn’t think he was a literal godsent angel and icon of perfect role-modeling who has never made mistakes or fallacies in his entire life, dude was also literally just a guy (with the wisdom to avoid any possible controversies. ) I like the content that came from their dynamic and that spawned in the fanbase because of it, and I enjoy consuming that media.

like yeah some creators fare better than others in terms of internet moral upstanding, but that’s just how life goes in general. Tell me you’ve never handled a real life dispute without telling me that you’ve never handled a real life dispute.

Also this is my official “I’ve fallen to goldenboys duo propaganda” post, I’m in it for the fanon content, not the ccs (although I’m fond of both of them, they just never make content together, and I don’t expect them to.)

[bunny-heels]

its still straight up wild to me that theres aspects of racism in Alan Wake 2.

the fact that Thornton and Mulligan were gonna pin the murder on two black young adults that came from the city that just happened to be there at the worst time, Saga having to assure them that she's not gonna let them be thrown in jail for something they clearly didn't do, the manuscript page that describes that their plan was ruined because Saga is leading the investigation and "people like them always stick together".

the worst part of it is not knowing if they were always like that or if they started acting like that because of what Scratch was doing to the story. if they were like that before the events of the game that would mean they've always just been racist, but if they're like that cause of Scratch then, well, that's not really surprising considering he's just the fucking Devil. of course he would use shit like race against a competent black woman who knows what she's talking about.

[anarcho-masochist]

Okay, I thought this was universal but maybe my last three therapists were right that it is not:

Is it normal for boredom to be truly unbearable?

As in, worse than anything else, would rather get eviscerated while fully conscious, will do anything to escape it which might actually include suicide if no satisfactory options are available?

[omarwolaeth]

thinking 'bout how the lads interact with what the bracelets represent, especially in their decks

[twilightarcade]

that clone thang

waves at you. Hi welcome to the post where I answer the clone question but don't really have a fun linear way of doing it so it ends up being as many words as my brain allows

[really fucking long warning]

anyways this question is reallyreally interesting and actually something I never think about despite the nature of it?? Like it's sorta one of those things that gets joked about or referenced a bunch but it's never actively on my mind. I think one of the major decision points for me would be whether they have the same memories as me, the same feelings, the same thought process, etc or if they're just some sorta guy that looks like me. I'm assuming it's the first but the latter is. Interesting at the least.

I said last time I would kill them which. Isn't anything I could morally justify in any way whatsoever. It's not from a place of fear or hate towards that guy in particular. It's not like "oh no I don't want a clone what time to kill him" it's more like,, yk. I think I would have more difficulty killing an exact clone of me, memories and all because that's such a dick thing to do?? I would hate to die so. They would presumably hate to die.? But there's also that mutual. Morbid curiosity I suppose. WHICH this whole thing is really generally dark and not on theme with this blog in general I guess but idk suck it up or whatever for now.

I would hate to kill someone in general actually, I don't condone murder, shockingly enough. Which this whole. Whatever. Opens up an argument about how I don't have the,, right? To kill my clone. Which I don't. I think he knows that though. I also know that. If we got into a? Legitimate fight. I don't know who would win. Obviously yes I should say me because I'm so cool and the original but that just goes back to the superiority thing don't you think? We're literally the same person and most of my actions outlined here is just some sorta. Mean.

Famously, I am not a fighter, not according to my dad at least. But that's just because I'm not? Running around and getting into fights?? I think if I jumped myself I could kill him. Or even just. Had a knife. I don't think we would fight though,? I think us killing each other or one of us could be arranged relatively peacefully. If that makes any sense.

I think if they were just an empty shell, some sorta guy that I don't know inhabiting my form, I would kill them. Without much thought behind it. Not out of hate for them, more out of hate for myself

back to less. Murderous thoughts, I think it would be incredibly comforting having someone I could like. Talk to. Assuming it's just. Me but not me. I could talk to them about absolutely anything! And they would get it! They would nod their heads and go mhm I know what you're talking about. I think in that respect we could be really good friends but that's not even really... friendship,? And even in terms of being comforting that's really limited because it's still just. Me. I'm still stuck with myself even if he does happen to be outside of my own mind. And I hate it and hate it and hate how as I'm going over all this I'm sitting here thinking "he would get it" because he's me!!! Of course he would get it.! Out of everyone on the goddamn earth if anyone was to get if of COURSE it would be myself!!! And it sickens me because there's still no further outside connection. I can talk to myself all day long but in the end does that really get me anywhere?? Does anything get resolved??? Like the whole thing with therapists and such is that you get an outside perspective on your problems or whatever and that's an INCREDIBLY inside perspective. i don't know.

getting away from that trainwreck because I'm trying oh so hard to get away from negatives here I think if like. I ignored all of that. We could be good friends. Maybe. I sort of hate the idea of having like? A reflection of myself? Some Guy that's not me yet still me. But in this ideal imaginative world, we could be good friends. We could bring each other up and all the good stuff. But at the end of the day I can't really escape the fact that.. it's me...?

I don't think I could live with that. I think we should walk away and never talk to each other again. I think the fact that there's some guy who's just. Me. Out there, somewhere would haunt me and eat away at me. In the perfect world we would be great friends! Do all that stereotypical "I have a clone time to make them do work for me" type stuff but in a loving caring relationship type way! But it's not really a perfect world and I'm not really a perfect person either and I would kill some guy that looks like myself just for the hell of it because I'm a dick I guess?????? I hate it and I'm a terrible person for it and i would not admit this in a court of law but oh my god!!!! I WISH I could just sum it up to one of the the generic responses but I CANT. I want me dead and I think I would also want me dead and it's some sorta terrible cycle till someone dies. Maybe it would be fine. Maybe I'm over thinking it. Maybe he wouldnt think too hard about it. But since he's me it probably would.? I sure would over think the implications of me being a clone of someone just look at me now! Documenting my delusions online. In a tumblr dot com post. We would be great friends if not for the horrors. I think we should vivisect each other.

[the-trans-dragon]

What if they didn't put ads every 3 posts. Three posts between ads, literally. Not even counting the ad for Tumblr Live.

Also what if tumblr didn't know what city Im in. I do not want my location tracked or stored anywhere unless I give explicit ongoing permission, like with my GPS app that I allow to track me only when the app is open, and then it deletes the data (allegedly) when I stop giving permission.

[naquey]

the... the world isn't ready for some visceral knowledge. the... the world isn't ready... not ready to hear THAT ALL OF YOUR FAVORITE CHARACTERS ARE OCS SO ITS PRACTICALLY HARMLESS TO MAKE AN OC TO SHIP WITH THEM OR AN X READER FIC

[arrowpunk]

Pro-tip: If you treat me with basic dignity and respect as a human being I will literally not have any issues with you.

[calamitynull]

*taps mic* *lean in* opinions on trans hunter? 👀

ok so this is a bit of a difficult one so i apologise if it gets longwinded because i do want to try and be as clear as possible but TL;DR: because of my heavily fanon interpretation of hunter, i worry about contributing to the fetishization of transmen

the long version:

Preface no. 1: i am not trying to say that trans men cant be subs

Preface no. 2: i am not trying to say that personality necessarily has an influence on sexual role preferences 

BUT.

the previous fandom i was in (arcane) did this funny thing where they tied [Being A Sub] to [Being A Trans Man] like it was some kind of absolute package deal, and they did this on a character who had no canon basis for it. people were literally changing his personality to be more submissive alongside their trans headcanon. it was as if by way of being trans he also had to be a sub, and that was just the way it was. i hope i dont have to explain how weird that is.

my worry here goes like this: specifically in regards to a headcanon that has no canon basis (woefully, pillow princess!hunter came to me in a vision and exclusively exists in my head separate from the show) i worry that, like with arcane, attempting to impose both at the same time onto a character such as hunter (preface 2 but points at arcane phenomena) it implies that i think being a sub and being a transman goes hand-in-hand, which i very much don't want people to think as that is fetishization. 

i Do like trans headcanons, and i Do like the idea of trans hunter, but simultaneously i feel like it meshes weirdly with all the pillow princess talk n the shit i get up to on this blog because of what happened with arcane viktor / [exaggeratedly subby transmen when theyre not like that in the show at all] (preface 2 but points at arcane phenomena), and i dont want to contribute to a similar sort of deal here. that being said if you have ideas that bypass all these worries and pitfalls im all ears

[jesterbots]

aiba knowing about my new name felt like some kind of evil wizard trick

[inkskinned]

i got rickrolled today but it didn't work because i have adblocker installed, so youtube just told me i violated the terms of service. yesterday i was trying to edit a picture as a joke for my girlfriend, and google made me check a box to prove i'm human because i wasn't "searching normally".

it isn't just that capitalism is killing fun and whimsy, it is that any element of entertainment or joy is being fed upon by this mosquito body, one that will suck you dry at any vulnerability.

do you want to meet new friends in your city? download this app, visit our website, sign up for our email list. pay for this class on making a terrarium, on candlemaking, on cooking. it will be 90 dollars a session. you can go to group fitness, but only under our specific gym membership. solve the puzzle, sign up for our puzzle-of-the-month-club. what is a club if not just a paid opportunity - you are all paying for the same thing, which makes you a community.

but you're like me, i know it - you're careful, you try the library meetings and the stuff at the local school and all of that. the problem is that you kind of want really specific opportunities that used to exist. you are so grateful for libraries and the publicly-funded things: they are, however, an exception - and everything they have, they've fought tooth-and-nail to protect. you read a headline about how in many other states, libraries have virtually nothing left.

do you want to meet up with your friends afterwards? gift your friends the discord app. you can choose to go to a cafe (buy a coffee, at least), a bar (money, alcohol) or you can all stay in and catch a movie (streaming) or you can all stay in bed (rent. don't get me started) and scream (noise complaint. ticket at least).

you want to read a new book, but the book has to have 124 buzzwords from tiktok readers that are, like, weirdly horny. you can purchase this audiobook on audible! your podcast isn't on spotify, it's on its own server, pay for a different site. fuck, at least you're supporting artists you like. the art museum just raised their ticket price. once, they had a temporary exhibit that acknowledged that ~85% of their permanent art galleries were from cis white men, and that they had thousands of works by women (even famous women, like frida! georgia o'keefe!) just rotting in their basement. that exhibit lasted for 3 months and then they put everything away again.

walmart proudly supports this strip of land by the street! here are some flowers with wilting leaves. its employees have to pay out-of-pocket for their uniforms. my friend once got fined by the city because she organized a community pick-up of the riverfront, which was technically private property.

no, you cannot afford to take that dance class, neither can i. by the way - i'm a teacher. i'm absolutely not saying "educators shouldn't be paid fairly." i'm saying that when i taught classes, renting a studio went from 20 bucks an hour to 180 in the span of 6 months. no significant changes to the studio were made, except they now list the place as updated and friendly. the heat still doesn't work in the building. i have literally never seen the landlord who ignores my emails. recently they've been renting it out at night as an "unusual nightclub; a once-in-a-lifetime close-knit party." they spent some of those 180 dollars on LEDs and called it renovating. the high heels they invite in have been ruining the marley.

do you want to experience the old internet? do you want to play flash games or get back the temporary joy of club penguin? you can, you just need to pay for it. i have a weird, neurodivergent obsession with occasionally checking in to watch the downfall and NFT-ification of neopets. if i'm honest with you all - i never got into webkins, my family didn't have the money to buy me a pointless elephant. people forget that "being poor" can mean literally "if i buy you that toy, i can't afford rent."

you and i don't have time to make good food, and we don't have the budget for it. we are not gonna be able to host dinner parties, we're not made of money, kid. do you want some kind of 3rd space? a space that isn't home or work or school? you could try being online, but - what places actually exist for you? tiktok counts as social media because you see other people on it, not because they actually talk to you.

there was a local winter tradition of sledding down the hill at my school. kids would use pizza boxes and jackets and whatever worked, howling and laughing. back in september, they made a big announcement that this time, rules were changing, and everyone must pay 10 dollars to participate. when im not scared shitless, i kind of appreciate the environmental irony - it hasn't gone below 40. so much for snow & joyriding.

i saw a bulletin for a local dogwalking group and, nervous about making a good first impression, showed up early. the first guy there grimaced at me. "sorry," he said. "there's a 30-dollar buy-in fee." i thought he was joking. wait. for what? the group doesn't offer anything except friendship and people with whom to walk around the city.

he didn't know the answer. just shrugged at me. "you know," he said. "these days, everything costs money."

[niallsblckgirlfriend]

Would love to feel for once like I’m worth a friendship 😭

[star-mum]

my parents just spontaneously invited their friends over like theres no oNE ELSE IN THE HOUSE ?????