Almost done replying to comments on AO3 and then I'll start working through all the asks and messages here!
In other news, I responded like a dog with a whistle when someone said, 'Where are you, pasta?' at the store. Presumably they were looking for lowercase pasta, and not uppercase Pasta, but I still got a weird look before I mumbled and wandered off.
I'm also currently watching one of my old fandoms (the one that got me back into writing fanfic which eventually led to TRT, ironically) eat itself alive after a trailer dropped for the new game and the response was... divisive. So Imma just bunker down here in the Daredevil fandom and on my peaceful feed and hide from that for a while. But that led to this hilarious exchange with a friend:
'So are you going to dust off your old AO3 account and write for *old game fandom* again?'
'are you kidding? I have Daredevil moss on me. I'm a part of the Marvel fic ecosystem now. At best I'll pop a root over to wiggle around in the Pedro Pascal section of forest, but that's it.'
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People have written way more scathing and intelligent takedowns on how Jill Stein is a grifter interested in scraping money from gullible people but the part that always takes me out when she inevitably resurfaces every US Presidential Election is how all her surrogates will tut tut you for voting democrat like a Sucker, dont you know voting is a scam, before immediately turning around and doing the same "If we just all vote for her everything will be fine immediately I prommy you just gotta all believe and vote" thing the quote unquote Gullible Libs do
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props to myself i have been somewhat consistently posting art for the past month after my long hiatus and im having fun with it so im giving myself a pat on the back
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Was tagged by @oceancamp to post my current five favorite songs! (They should invent a stages-of-grief-esque model that encompasses and accurately describes both types of anguish I had to go through making this list - the one of limiting myself to only five songs, and the one of trying to put as little videogame music on here as possible so that I don't end up looking like an absolute goddamn geek, which... I am... Oh well!)
Thank you so much for tagging me - here are the songs!
Heaven Pierce Her - War Without Reason
Tatsuro Yamashita - Love Space
This specific arrangement of Death And Republic + Meet Again
Winger - Junkyard Dog (Tears On Stone)
The Protomen - Light Up The Night
Is it courtesy to tag other people after you've been tagged in a post like this? If that's the case, I'll tag @spiralled-fury, @solradguy, @swamppossum, @five-by-five, @northstarring, @ineedmoredragons and @tbonechessor!
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? Brother asked me to feed his hamster when he goes on holiday and like. He moved out. Yknow? Like. The only way for me to get to his house is either to walk like 40 minutes since he's too close for a different train station or get driven there and if im being driven then why wouldn't the driver just do it
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If you had to pick a Seb/Omi fic of yours thats your favourite, which would it be? (I love all of them but I was wondering your own opinion 💚)
The way I've thought about this so many times and still struggle to pick 😩 but thank you lovie ! I'm stoked that you like my writing enough to enjoy all of my raunchy ramblings 💕
I think for Sebastian it's a tie between The Hypothesis and To the Victor Go the Spoils. I have a soft spot for my first contribution to the fandom, but I also had a ton of fun writing the latter :))
For Ominis I think I can safely say Secrets is my favorite ! I was half bald by the time I finished it because of how much hair I ripped out trying to write it, but the final result was worth the stress LMAO
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Thinkin about gender and spirituality
Preface: I don't have a real point to this. I just remembered you can basically post anything to tumblr.
My ex-mother in law said something to me the first time we met.
"I've never understood queer relationships. You need the masculine and the feminine to balance eachother out... But I suppose that's why gays tend to have one masculine partner and one feminine partner."
This woman was a huge name in the druidic community of the UK. She is polyamorous. She told me that she remembered past lives and regularly saw the dead, animal and human. But she couldn't wrap her head around the idea of something outside of heteronormativity.
And she wasn't the only one in my life like that. I was basically raised a little heathen but I still grew up white in the US. Christian overtones policed my thinking and the thinking of those who influenced me. Most of my non-male partners have been feminine in their gender expression, and in turn I acted more and more masculine. I tried to fit a role based on expectations rather then what I (or even my partners) wanted.
Now I'm with someone I expect will be for life. They are 'masc' in that they are Butch. Not divorced from their womanhood even if they do not embrace that part of themselves the way someone who really enjoyed more 'typical' femininity would. Meanwhile I just bought two skirts for the first time since middleschool and I'm becoming even more comfortable with the term 'agender'.
I'm still a spiritual person, more now then when I knew and had access to people with connections in the 'neo pagan' movements. And yet every fucking time I see people talking about spirituality I still see people stumble over the ideas of the 'masculine' and the 'feminine' in nature.
My ex-MIL also said once that I should be careful not to anthropomorphize things. That my experience with a specific tree feeling safe when I was a child in need was probably just me projecting.
On this one thing, I actually agree with her. We project a lot of bullshit onto the natural world. And onto ourselves. Especially in the spiritual community. What is masculine about the sun? What is feminine about the moon? Nothing. They are objects in space with mass and gravity. Why would that make them any less magical? They still have a huge impact on our lives. The sun's impact is generally more overt. The moon's is more subtle. We can talk about these things in how they relate to us, I don't think that's unreasonable. You can't experience the world except from your own perceptions. The sun is hot and brings life but also can cause damage and death. The moon and night is cold but gives us the tides which effects us just as much but usually in ways we either live far from or don't directly think about/see.
The problem really comes in, I think, from how we don't just say 'the sun is masculine and the moon is feminine' it's how that inevitably leads us to imposing that duality onto people. People pose anthropomorphized ideas onto things that are not human and in turn try to use it as a mirror or a measuring stick to hold up against themselves or other humans. And not all cultures even believed these things or have lines drawn this strongly, I know. But I can only talk from the experience I've lived. The presence of strict ideals that specifically Christian-fascism (current and historic) have given us are so pervasive in people like me that they go completely unquestioned. Every book I read, including my ex-MIL's did nothing to question it, and in many cases actively reinforced it.
It's really no wonder that there is a fast and ugly pipeline of 'witch' to 'right-wing' if the people who position themselves as outside the mainstream culture are still just recreating it in the spaces they make.
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