#this post brought to you by the fact i keep randomly forgetting & remembering different of these points throughout the day XD

[thatfriendlyanon]

big big day tomorrow!! including but not limited toooo:

first day of napowrimo*

one of my best friend's birthdays

probably gonna make a post on instagram announcing my release date + showing off my book cover???

expecting two items in the mail !!!

*national poetry writing month: where you write a poem a day in april

[werezmastarbucks]

xenia

honeymoon masterlist

word count: 2851

warnings: mentions of parental abuse

music: damsel in distress by neck deep, beautiful stranger by halsey

You did shots that night.

Xenia has been one of the stops on your ridiculously meticulous search through Ohio. One mention that one of Kai’s grandmothers might be buried here somewhere, and that she was a siphoner, too, which is a rare, and you stopped in Xenia, digging up every inch of the earth.

In fact, at some point, as you lived on in this weird world, systematic search has grown into a kind of manic entertainment.

You took everything to extremes. Searching for the grave, that might have answers and magical solutions, you basically unearthed the whole cemetery, because Kai said that maybe somebody wanted to hide his nana’s body, because she was a shameful accident, being a siphoner and all that. And that random guess got stuck in your heads, turning you into paranoid diggers. Really, you were just keeping yourselves busy. Doing the things you would never normally do in your usual life. Why would you walk around a town, digging the ground randomly, and putting so much effort in it? After a couple of days of incredible stamina fueled work, Xenia looked like it’s been ravaged by gigantic moles. Then Parker remembered. She has never been to Xenia, she lived, and died in Cincinnati.

And that’s why you were doing shots.

You invented a reverse never have I ever game which was called nobody has ever. The point was to think of all the things other people never did for you, and the luckier one had to drink, but obviously, pretty soon the game turned dark.

You found this nice house on the Creek Green Street that overlooked an old alley with a post office that must have been about sevety years old. You wondered how it survived the tornado.

The kitchen was big, and the table, square and made of very thick, nice looking wood, consumed the soft golden lights of the evening. Although your shoulders were hurting you almost to the point of whining, since no matter how many days you dug, your body wouldn’t get stronger, you made a salad. Kai cooked up a myriad of snacks, and they were all piling up on the table in a colorful, tasty mess. It felt like you were both drunk from work and the absurdity of your chore even before you opened up the bottle.

“Nobody has ever”, he said, narrowing his eyes, “hit me in the throat with a tennis ball”.

You shook your head slowly. The shots rested on the table. You were leaning against the table, one foot under you, and listened to music and your joints singing the mournful song of pain. Kai was rubbing his chin musingly. Days in Xenia were very warm - unlike in all other towns. That was amazing to you. Without the people, and the hurry, you could concentrate on the world itself and actually found every location had its own smell, temperature, color. Once you got out, you’d never be the same.

“Nobody has ever cut my hair while I was sleeping”.

Kai nodded responsibly and downed his shot. You raised your brows.

“Oh, I was way too agitated, and never liked scissors near my face. Mom always cut my hair while I was asleep. I was ugly when I was little. One more reason”, he shrugged, “to be hating on lil Malachai”.

You hummed.

“Nobody has ever said they loved me”, he continued, gravely.

Air got stuck in your throat.

You swayed in your place.

“Come on. Not ever?”

“Nah”.

You took your shot and thought, who actually said that to you, except your mother. People usually said it in a friendly way. You couldn’t count how many times Elena said she loved you, and it didn’t mean much at the end of the day.

“Not even in a casual way, like, oh my god, you like Metallica, too? I love you!”

Kai chuckled.

“I don’t like Metallica”.

“Jesus. Okay. You wanna go hardcore. Nobody has ever chose me over everything and everybody else”, you offered.

Kai smirked and took his shot, and then reached for the bottle again.

“How? How come? And they never said they love you? Who?”

“I have learnt to manipulate people into choosing me over everything else. That’s how I keep sane, ha”, he noted. You frowned.

“Who was it?”

He looked at you with surprise.

“You. You chose me over everything else in your life when you decided to spend an eternity here with me. That was pretty nice of you. Cheers”, and he drunk again, forgetting he had already done his shot. You could feel the blood flowing to your face.

“I did it because I thought Damon would stop. I didn’t expect him to send me here”.

Kai shrugged, as if saying, it wasn’t really his problem Damon was a piece of shit.

“And why did you mainpulate me into it?”

Bold of him to assume he had manipulated you into liking him, but his way of thinking is different.

“Because I like you. I wanted you to stick with me. You’re the only person who doesn’t make me feel like a burden”, he replied with a lot of importance. He was a little tipsy.

You sighed heavily.

“Nobody has ever buried me under the ground in a drain pipe”, he ogled.

“Mm-hmm”.

He grinned as you drank.

“By the way, after that, when I made a scene (because I was sixteen) about Damon not killing the love of his life over me, Katherine called me a delusional teenager. God I hate that bitch”.

“Katherine Pierce never infuriated me because I never met her”, he put it.

“It’s not your turn”, but you drank anyway, “Nobody has ever called me an abomination”.

He saluted you with his shot.

“Nobody has ever made me his door boy”.

Shot.

“Nobody has ever took away my natural right of being the leader of my coven”.

Shot.

Your right shoulder stang you with annoying pain, and you glanced at the clock. Midnight would come in a couple of minutes. You always started drinking just before midnight because the change of the day brought you back to sobriety, and you could go on and drink the same amount again without feeling bad in the morning.

As the midnight struck, you suddenly found yourself sitting so close to Kai your foreheads were touching.

You both straightened up and looked at the time. He stretched his neck.

“Were we drunk-confessing our mutual respect for each other?” you asked.

“Think so”, he pulled a bowl of salad to himself and started eating, without forgetting to fill the shots again.

“Happy birthday”.

You clincked your tiny glasses together, and the game went on.

“Nobody has ever cooked for me”, he said.

You downed your shot thinking about how fabulous it is, to have your own chef who is also in love with you.

At the same second, you wondered if he has ever thought about poisoning you, just for the sake of it.

“I have hard time believing it. You’ve made it to twenty-two, which meant your parents cooked for you”.

“We had lots of kids in the house. We always had to eat all together”, Kai shook his head, “if you were late to the table, you had to starve. Besides, I started cooking for myself pretty early”.

“Okay. Nobody has ever locked me up in the basement”.

He was so good at this game, taking his losing drinks like a champ, like a very diligent student. As his adam’s apple went down, you gasped.

“Oh, wait. Spit it out! Spit it out. I recalled. I’ve been locked up in basements plenty of times, it was just... more like... a dungeon”.

“In the Salvatore house?” he asked, displeased.

“Yeah. And once, in the Lockwood mansion. Damon was raging then. We got stuck and...”

“Whatever”.

You licked your lips and shut up, seeing the familiar irritated spark in his eyes. Kai hated Damon at this point; for sending him away; for being not his type of person; but most importantly, for the fact you still lingered on the memories of him.

Gradually, you started running out of ideas, drunk again, and it was barely past one in the morning.

Kai at least was constantly eating, while you just drank, so you now had a hard time focusing on one thing, your thoughts drifting apart like ripples on the water. You looked at his white wrists, his knees hopping lightly as he bounced to the music, and tried to think of something.

“Nobody has ever... ever...” you puffed. Kai smiled. “Ever stood over me at night, watching me sleep”.

“Yes, I have”.

You didn’t get it at first.

“What?”

“I have”, he repeated.

“Oh, you mean... of course, I mean, back in the outer world”.

He nodded, like it was just a tiny misunderstanding about the size of a cheesburger he’s ordering.

“Oh, yeah, yeah. I was in your house at night before we got here”.

“What?!” you snapped.

All your body moved you towards him to slap him on the head, but out of instinct, the unkillable, fundamental instinct that kicked in when he was around, you took his head, let your palms slide down to his neck, as you hugged him.

“Kai, why would you do that?”

“I don’t know, I just wanted to see what you look like when you’re not around me”, he said simply. You could feel his mouth moving against your hair close to your ear. “What you look like when you stare at yourself in the mirror. What you do when nobody’s watching”.

You shut your eyes with embarrassment, your brain trying to recall all the things you did alone back in your house one hundred years ago.

“Oh god...”

“What you smell like when you’re just out of shower. You know, stuff like that”.

“God, this is so embarrassing”.

He laughed out with amusement.

You pulled away and took his head, covering his ears with your plams. His face swayed in front of you a little, as you muttered,

“You have to promise me something, Parker”.

“Okay”, he said carefully.

He could’ve said, of course! because you knew him. You knew how he pretends to be this enthusiastic person. Who is only serving you. But he was real right then, at that moment, looking you in your drunk eye, really considering what you’re about to ask. He could’ve said of course! and not mean it. But he said okay, ruffling up like a ferret, and you loved him at that moment.

“Once we get out, don’t stalk other girls”.

His face moved with laughter he contained inside.

“Why would I do that?”

You thought of that wretched universe full of good-looking girls, and all their different shapes and colors, the way they smell and how gracious they are, and felt scared of losing him for the first time.

“They’re all so pretty, and I... just don’t. Do whatever you can to...”

“You don’t think you’re pretty?” he asked in his are you dumb tone. “You’re a solid eight”.

You have lived enough to feel all kinds of wonders when intoxicated. You’ve sang, blacked out, stumbled, yelled, fought and slept when drunk, and now the very logical reaction followed, which you have also experienced many times.

You started sobbing.

“Eight”, you put your hand to your face, cradling yourself, and consoling yourself immediately.

Kai’s face went almost pale with shock. Then he started giggling uncontrollably, reaching his arms for you.

“I’m joking! Hey, I’m joking”.

He couldn’t start laughing.

“What are you upset about? I’m just fooling with you”.

“I’ve always been an eight!” you cried out, suddenly.

“For your information, eight is fantastic!”

“Katherine has always been a ten”, you finished solemnly, drowning in the pleasure of digging into your deepest wells of insecurity.

Kai froze.

“Don’t tell me you’re thinking about Damon right now. I swear to fuck, I’ll break your neck”.

You tilted your head miserably, letting the tears stream down your face in a dramatic fashion.

“Aaaahhh”.

“Y/N...”

“Damon has made me think that I’m a fool for ever thinking somebody can be into me”, you said quietly. You could feel his hand on the base of your neck. As your hot tears dripped down, heating the perfume on your skin, his grab tightened lightly. He didn’t know how to hold tenderly, it was always half-clutching with Kai. With time, you came to realize it was so reassuring you felt the safest when his hands were around your throat. Whether it was playful or menacing depended on his mood.

“Let me rain on your self-pitying parade”, he murmured, “okay? My parents made me think I didn’t deserve to breathe even. Pretty natural, don’t you think? Everyone has their right to have air in their lungs”.

You looked at him. Kai was being serious. You wiped your cheek with the back of your hand, and his face softened a little.

“But my dad decided I wasn’t worth even that”.

“What are you saying?”

“Once I was sitting in the bath, when I was about five. That was the time you start getting your magic and learn how to control it. That was the time the whole coven found out I don’t have it. That Jo is useless, too, because I’m a siphoner. So one night, when I was in the bath”, he repeated, like he was trying to hypnotize you, “he came in, and...” he looked away, blinking several times. “I remember, he was wearing this dark green shirt. Green is the color of the coven. He held my head under water”.

There was a short break between two songs, and when the next one came in, blasting sounds, you shivered uncomfortably.

“He decided he’d spare himself and everybody else the headache. That’s why I don’t like water much and barely ever go near it. And now you taught me how to swim”.

“How did you survive?” you whispered.

“My mom barged in and pulled him away. I don’t know how she knew. Maybe it was her motherly instinct. She used to have that one for me long time ago”.

The tears welled up on you, pressure pushing on the sides of your skull. You took him, kissing his face, kissing his mouth, as Kai leaned in, quiet, and just let you dote on him. You held him tight, trying to kiss the memories out, begging him to forget.

“I’m okay. Hey, I’m fine. It was a long time ago, and he’s dead. And I’m alive. And I have you”.

You were so drunk, falling apart at the seams like a badly sewn jacket, that he had to hold you so that you didn’t fall off the chair. Hangover was guaranteed.

“Let’s just go... let’s go to bed”, you whispered, your face against his. “You can do whatever you want”.

Kai smiled. His eyes glinted in a familiar way. This kitchen, the house, it all grew on you. The way he held you, you didn’t even know if your feet touched the floor.

“Whatever I want?” he asked.

“Whatever you want”, you echoed.

He put your body onto the couch, and you could feel he moves your limbs a little, and then the weight of his body was next to you.

Fifteen minutes later, you pulled the covers down, and turned towards the light, and saw the TV shining through the blackness of the room.

Kai was watching Lethal Weapon on VHS and cuddling against you.

You inhaled, feeling he room spinning. The light stang your eyes, so you rolled back away and pressed your face into him, into the darkness.

The next time you woke up it was already dark.

You moved a little just to know where you are, and indicated his arms around you. Comfort settled down immediately, but the insane temperatures of his dozing body was too much, so you tried to kick the cover down to your feet. Kai lifted one of his arms unwillingly. It was still deep dark outside the window, and the old post office must have been standing there in complete fright.

“How many parts have you watched?”

“Three”, he said sleepily. You considered whether you were thirsty enough to try and go to the kitchen. Decided it wasn’t worth it. Your face felt a bit swollen with tears, but you felt comfortably tired. You wouldn’t leave this couch even if somebody lit it on fire.

“It’s not true, by the way”, he said.

“Huh?”

“My dad never tried to drown me”.

You rolled your eyes without opening them up.

“Wha...”

“I made it up, I was just trying to make you feel better”.

“You moron. You unbelievable moron, you...”

“You really have to stop calling me names, it hurts”.

“Douchebag. Why... Kai, you told me you weren’t a liar”.

He did something resembling a shrug. You felt his knee between yours, and slid your arm onto his back.

“You made me a liar. You’re changing me”, he mumbled, “I’m changing here with you. I can feel it”.

[heyimtavia]

THE POST FINALE HENRY DANGER OPINIONS TAG:

Hey party people! Sorry I’ve been a bit out of the loop. Due to what’s going on in the world, adulting sorta got in the way and I have to DVR the final episode. No one tagged me, but I just wanted to add my two cents since this is officially the end and this is a really cute tag.

1. Who was your overall favorite member of Team Danger and why?

Charlotte hands down. She was brilliant, sassy and just a great friend to Henry no matter what. She’s one of the main reasons why I decided to tune into the show. I saw a lot of myself in her. I was once that little smart black girl that no one listened too. But it’s okay though, but that GLOW UP is real! I know from experience lol.

2. Who was your favorite non-team danger character and why?

Y'all know I love Fran the security guard. She should’ve gotten more air time. I just think she’s hilarious! I’d loved to see her try to wrestle a dolphin any day!

3. Who was your favorite villain and why?

Dr. Minyak & Nurse Cohort. I just gotta respect his hustle. Other than Rex and Rick Twitler, I feel like he’s the only everyday villain who always came close to defeating Captain Man & Kid Danger. He always had unique plans; from capturing and brain-altering Charlotte to taking Piper and the man fan hostage, he was always creative. Plus I love his little temper tantrums he sometimes throws. 

4. What were your top five favorite Henry Danger episodes of all time and why?

1) All time Fav would go to The Great Cactus Con. From the dopeyness of how everyone can do a backflip instead of Ray. How Charlotte gets to show off her fashion design skills. How Piper unofficially works with Team Danger. Plus I love the cute romantic bit between Jasper and Patina. 2) Rumblr- That whole episode was just comedy gold for me. They should’ve brought Kyle back for the finale and had him show up at kid danger’s funeral  3) I dream of Danger - Its Char’s episode. I like how it alluded to Charlotte’s dream might come true but it doesn’t. However, I don’t like how they just moved on like the episode never happened even when Jasper thinks that char likes him. 4) Flabber Gassed- I love that char got to show off her fighting skills and how happy Jasper was to be a superhero. 5) Holey Moley- I straight up die for laughter every time I see that episode. I love how Henry kept saying, “oh look, a downside.” I feel like that episode would have been a sketch on All That or the Amanda Show. It just felt like good ole Nickelodeon comedy.

5. What were your top five least favorite Henry Danger episodes of all time and why?

1) Henry’s Birthday- Call me a diva, but if anyone treated me like that on my birthday, the party is OVER! 2) Captain Makini (I think that's what it’s called). Sorry, I'm not really a fan of Frankie Grande and though he was great for the musical, I really don’t think he needed a second episode. 3) Meet Cute Crush- I’m sorry, anything involving Piper is just physical and emotionally draining. All that girl does is yell. Thank u, next. 4) Sick & Wired- Because I got sick and tired of Ray’s shenanigans. 5) JAM Session- Now Piper isn’t my favorite character, but how that girl was manipulated all over a bet was just stupid and disrespectful.

6. What was your favorite running gag and why?

1) Fran’s line, “There’s only one in the whole world, and we got it!” Swellview must be a fun, mysterious place that always gets amazing things lol. 2) When everyone says “Click” before hanging up their phone. I find it funny because I’m pretty sure the kids had never owned a flip phone in their lives.

7. What was your favorite one-off throw away gag and why?

When shwoz referenced his song from the musical when he said, “Science, science, science, I’ve said this already.” I think he said this in Theranos boot. And also the grammar fights and how grammar rules don’t apply to Charlotte lol.

8. What episode, which character and which duo made you laugh the most?

I think Holey Moley & Rumblr both made me laugh the most. Those were great episodes. Jasper would have to be the funniest. That boy says the darndest things lol. Hensper. Because of how Henry loved Jasper’s mustache and wanted to get one too. And when Jasper and Henry were both “Dude. Bro. Dude. Bro. DUDE!” Over the Patina situation and Charlotte had to break them up.

9. What episode, which character and which duo made you the most emotional?

I think it was Second episode of the finale episodes, when Henry was freaking out at the end because he was alone and Rex had sent Ray A Million and one years into the past. The fact that he literally had to think like all of his friends because obviously that’s what he was used to, everyone being there to help figure out a plan and keep swellview safe. And the fact that for that moment he was kid danger and all alone was really scary for him.

10. How would you rank each season from 1 to 5, one being the best and five being the worst?

I would rank season 5 as 1. It overall had great episodes and delved into different genres and fun tv and movie tropes. It made it a joy to watch, though some episodes leading towards the end didn’t quite catch me. Season 4 would be like a high 4 but not exactly a 5. Season 3 was sorta Meh to me. So maybe a #.  Season 2 would be a 4 and season 1 would be like a 4 because it was a the beginning to a great show and was still working out the kinks a bit.

11. Who was your favorite duo in the show (romantic or non-romantic)?

Chenry 100%. The friendship that those two have is great! Now I must say, I hate that Nick was still posting about them on their youtube page for clout knowing that it wasn’t gonna happen. I felt like they did that just so people would watch the final episodes. I was gonna watch regardless, but really Nick? Really?

12. What was your favorite Henry and Ray moment/episode?

The bro song! Plus I love that it kept getting referenced after the musical as well.

13. What was your favorite Chenry moment/episode?

 When Char was controlling  Henry in flabber gassed, she made him jump up and down while clapping! I love that even shwoz joined in too lol. And when Henry was concerned about her after she ate bad meat from the auto snacker.

14. What was your favorite Hensper moment/episode?

The mustache scene from Grand Theft Otto, “dude if I had one, I’d be Man Danger!”

15. What was your favorite Chensper moment/episode?

This also kinda includes Ray but when they were all stealing Joss Ross’s gift from her birthday party and they were just casually leaving. And how Jasper kept saying, “It’s not stealing if it’s from a criminal.” Plus I like the episode when Hen and Char have to pretend to date just to see if Jasper would keep their secret. The boy poured a whole bowl of pees down his shirt lmaoooo!!

16. If you could go back and change one element of the show, what would it be?

 Have Ray grow up and stop fawning over Henry’s mom. It was just plain creepy! Oh and put some respect on my girl Charlotte’s name.

17. If you could say one thing to each main character in the pilot, what would it be?

Life isn’t always about one day getting a statue, (I’m looking at YOU Captain Man). Crime-fighting is fun and being a sidekick could literally every kid’s dream. But don’t forget to be a kid. Hangout with your friends, go to school, go on dates. Do the whole growing up thing. But at the end of the day, you have to do what’s best for you.

18. If you could say one thing to each main character in the finale, what would it be?

Thank you for sharing your lives with me and I am so so sooo proud of you all! 

19. Were you satisfied with the finale? What part was your favorite and what part was your least favorite?

 Honestly, I think it was okay for what it was. My fav part was when Jasper literally had to carry Char out of the mancave because she refused to leave Henry behind. I love that they decided to stick together. They did leave a lot of storylines open. I thought Joss Moss would be revealed as the real Mob boss. I thought Rick Twitler would regain his memory. Where the heck is Gooch? Caitlin? Chenry (for obvious reasons). I'm just spitballing here. Was it good? Yes. could it have been better? Hell yes.

20. What would your ideal Henry danger spin off look like?

 Charlotte and Henry have powers and Jasper can fight! Dystopia. That was the spin-off that I wanted! I don’t really care about the new kids as much. They’re college-aged too? Just imagine the shenanigans they would get into! But we need to kick the Charlotte hating writer off the staff though. Can The CW pick this show up?

21. Where do you personally see the characters 10 years from now? What are they doing, who are they with, where are they in their lives - what do you think happened to them? Most importantly, are they happy?

 I honestly haven’t thought about it. But I believe no matter what they do or where they may end up, they will be happy. They’ll probably always be a team.

22. What was your favorite part of the show and why did it initially draw you in?

It became an escape from my normal adult life. (I’m saying like I’m old. I’m only 23.) I randomly flipped it on one day, I can't remember what episode it was, but from then on, I was hooked. I used to watch it a while back, but I fell off, but at that moment on time, it was easy for me to fall right back into it.

23. What was your favourite part of the fandom and why did it initially draw you in?

The friends I’ve made, the people have met! They are the best out of all the fandoms I’m a part of. I’ve been on tumblr for years and never had I have a group of people be so nice, supportive and just incorporate me into things. I love you guys so much!

24. Describe your overall emotions/feelings regarding the show being over and the show in general, looking back on it as a whole, with one quote from the show.

It’s a bittersweet feeling. I hate to see it go. But all good things must come to an end. But I guess there’s nothing better to say than, “Feels Good.”

25. If you were able to add one scene in the finale, what would you add?

 I don’t know honestly. Maybe we could have seen him reunite with his friends and family. Especially Charlotte and Jasper, Afterall, they probably thought that their best friend was dead for all they knew.

26. Favorite outfit/hair style?

 Charlotte’s Date outfit with Jack Swagger. Sis was rockin that romper. Also when Jasper and Charlotte were helper bunnies! Those outfits were hilarious and cute.

27.Least favorite character?

I'm sorry but Piper. She was worse than the whole annoying little sister trope. I swear all ash did was yell through most of the seasons and then they gave this chick a driver’s license, I mean what?? Plus i think her reaction to finding out Henry was kid danger was better in Broken Armed and Dangerous, than in twisted sister. 

28. What is question you would like to ask the writers/ producers?

Im tagging @adorkable-blackgirl @chenoahchantel

[wwounu]

mafia!jeonghan “YOON” #11

↻ masterlist — intro￤s.coups￤yoon￤hong￤wen￤hoshi￤jeon￤woozi￤dk￤kim￤xu￤boo￤chwe￤lee

traitor

member of Venor Unit

his role is more of a spy, however jeonghan likes the term ‘traitor’ more than anything

there are many rumours about him

only a handful have been picked to be debunked as true or false

for years he’s still been rumoured whether or not hes a member of seventeen

surprise surprise, he is

and the story of how he was recruited was one he’d never forget

because who would forget his missing nineteen-year old childhood friend climbing up to the top of his penthouse, at 1:27 in the morning, and suddenly break and walk into your bedroom like it’s no big deal?

in other words, he wasn’t pleased to see his dearest seungcheol

his friend was talking about all sorts of nonsense the moment he startled awake: japan, gangs, tattoos,, bad haircuts,,, poisoned ice cream??

this wasnt the seungcheol he remembered

so with mixed feelings, jeonghan told seungcheol to crash on his bed while jeonghan would take the couch and asking seungcheol to take a shower because he looked like he came back from a fight with a shark

when morning came seungcheol was trying to explain jeonghan about the wonderful complicated world of mafia business

but jeonghan had none of it — it sounded unreal

on top of that he was more fussed over seungcheol leaving for two years and not telling his own friend about it

with all this anger building inside him, mainly due to the stress of trying to get his head around this whole... thing, he told seungcheol to leave and go back home

seungcheol gave a look at him, a hard look, before he sighed and stormed out of the place

jeonghan didnt miss the small ‘no one ever stops to listen to someone like me’ under seungcheol’s breath

and never in their friendship they brought light upon their many differences, so it kinda tugged on jeonghan’s heartstrings

it saddened him knowing he didn’t give the welcome his friend wanted but at the time he thought he was in the right

then for the next two weeks, seungcheol was desperately trying to get jeonghan to join his ‘mafia’

(mafia in asteriks, because jeonghan wasn’t having any of his bullshit)

through messages, messy letters, he even received a collection post-it notes stuck around his penthouse without traces of who did this even though he fully knew well who it was 

and that night jeonghan was paranoid that seungcheol would randomly break in again

then the desperation for help stopped for the next month

although jeonghan did enjoy the attention from his best friend and wanted to continue this ‘fun’ game, he began to grow concerned

his best friend disappeared without a trace. again.

the cope was harder to deal with this time, because the insignificant thought about seungcheol truly being a mafia boss was becoming the host of his nightmares

you best believed the utter shock on his face when he saw seungcheol sat beside his door around midnight

hood up, dirty head to toe and one nasty cut on his lip and cheek

jeonghan was supposed to go to a party, but that priority was ignored straight away

he takes seungcheol in, aiding the cuts before doing anything else

as jeonghan would expect from the man, seven year old seungcheol would be screaming ugly noises with snot running down along his tears

but this other seungcheol didn’t flinch at the pressure of the alcohol touching his skin, and looked in every direction to avoid jeonghan

that — thankfully — hadn’t changed

seungcheol always payed attention to his surroundings when he doesnt want to be in a situation. it happened a lot with his father

so jeonghan asks why he looks like shit

and all the anxieties rush to his brain as the thought of his lash of anger to seungcheol caused the latter to end up like this

questions like when did he last eat?, where did he stay?, did i do this?

but seungcheol started explaining himself

something about these high schoolers ganging up on a sixteen year old in their school because of his looks, seungcheol stood up for this said ‘sixteen year old’ and found the four-against-one fight fair play until they brought out knives and seungcheol was like youve got to be kidding me

and suddenly, one thing led to another and the sixteen year old lit a tree on fire???? and he lifted a stray branch, took out a lighter, then lit it before storming to the high schoolers with a maniac-like look on his face

and the kid was then gone as he chased the high schoolers away

seungcheol had never been more confused

but he had to get out as there was still the,,, burning tree there,,,,,,

and when he finished his story, he paused, falling silent again and sort of bitterly saying ‘sorry, half of the things i say sound unbelievable now’

and jeonghan is a bit offended but he wasn’t going to push seungcheol away yet again

so jeonghan tells him that he believes him and at first seungcheol kept arguing that he’s bluffing for his sake

surprised, jeonghan reassures him again and again to get it through seungcheol’s head that he’s going to join him because he’s going through a hard time, anyone can see that

remaining silent, seungcheol nods before he manages out a thanks

they apologise and forgive each other, and later that night seungcheol tells everything — and i mean everything — about his family and the mafia

it was a heavy night for seungcheol

which brings us to today

since jeonghan was born into a rich family, it made seungcheol’s job way more easier than it was as jeonghan had higher class connections with others while his friend kept lowkey

he can have news alerted to him quickly like updates on parties, social events, scandals, some juicy affairs here and there, all that corrupt high-society crap

and he gets the odd word about some mafias in korea, making it his duty to report all of it back to seungcheol

with seungcheol’s command, he does whatever he instructs him to do, which is to spy on any updates of the situation

hence why he’s always out at fancy social-events

its truly a bore though. he’d rather sleep in

you may think he’s just acting naive most of the time — but he’s listening to every word and every moment he can sink in all around him

the highlight of the night is when everyone gets drunk, which is the perfect time to hear their dark secrets and use his sweet-talk

effortlessly finds a way to manipulate his way to invite himself and seventeen, who’d he’d call associates, to any banquet whenever he senses dirty work will commence

his pretty-boy looks usually do the trick ‘seventeen’s pretty boy’, the group calls him

makes the time to take care of the member’s schedules and invitations to these places, even going to the extent to make replica invitations

creates a plan of how the members enter so that they wouldn’t be seen together and raise eyebrows

particularly during these events, other suspicious men try to keep a close eye on jeonghan due to the rumours of his relation to the seventeen mafia

yet they’re wasting their time because he’s never in one place and socialises with many people

often when he strays on his own, he explores the area and wanders from room after room to find anything else valuable

normally reports to wonwoo what he finds through an earpiece

‘i found a diary’

‘youre going to open it arent you’

‘risqué, she keeps a taser and a ton of money in her lingerie set’

‘dont take the money’

‘wasnt going to’

‘jeonghan drop the roll of money right now’

‘... fine’

‘okay’

‘i took the taser instead!’

did i mention that he needs to ‘borrow’ a belonging as his souvenir for the places he visits

and because of junhui, he has semi-mastered the skill to hide all evidence

also pretty much hates it when he’s rushed, needs to take his tiem with everything (excluding when they’re in grave danger then that’s different)

mouth runs a lot so when he really needs information to be spilt, he exposes other lowkey scandals to get the information he needs

this is where he gets his traitor title from

if he’s framed as a traitor, he turns the tables around and either puts the blame on someone else or on the person calling him a traitor

he’s grown up in this corrupt class and knows all the dirty ins and outs of it

when he feels like he’s being interrogated to spill information, he takes control of the conversation and does subtle things like asking for things usually pouting when doing so or complimenting on one thing before discussing something completely off topic

he can never expose seventeen and will never expose them even if he’s dying 

another off-topic fact, he calls people babe a lot

mainly because it makes people feel a certain way, but its jeonghan’s self-acclaimed magic word

that word does things

is also a part of A Team, but due to the fact jeonghan is always busy, they dont work together as often as they used to

looking at soonyoung, wonwoo and jeonghan, you wouldn’t think of them to be that close but they’ve had history

out of all of seventeen, he’s the weakest in terms of weaponry since he’s basically just a informant to seventeen

therefore his choice of weapon are usually used by the closest thing to him

prefers glass as his choice of weapon if he had to choose, so because of this minghao frequently gives him smashed wine bottles for jeonghan’s use

a bit of a brat

but seventeen never mentions it

loves seeing people beg in front of him, especially when theyre desperate

this might be because he likes attention on him

teasing and poking fun at them gives him the greatest joy, it leaves him so satisfied but also wanting more

normally after difficult jobs done by the whole group, when Perficio Unit are clearing up the last of the evidence and killing the last of their suffering enemies, jeonghan skips in to take a wonder around too

Perficio Unit let him because its jeonghan

blood is soaked everywhere, many men are on the floor, some dead, possibly not, and their fancy suits all ruined while the four males finishing the job play jazz music on blast as they take care of the remains

just another job for seventeen

and jeonghan inspects each face, making sure the fear is their eyes while theyre slowly dying from blood loss. if they arent, then jeonghan pulls a gun out of his pocket and points it at them, getting the reaction he wants

(the gun was full of blanks anyway, what’s there to be scared about??)

decides to steal a wristwatch from one of the men and gets told off by the unit because they now have to get rid of jeonghan’s dirty fingerprints for stealing the accessory

loves it even more when Perficio Unit are in the middle of an interrogation (on most occasions they lead the questioning) back in their hideout and pops down to see how their ever-so suffering victim is hanging in there

generally summoned down if 1. wonwoo is busy or 2. they need the victim to speak a bit more

jeonghan doesn’t play once he comes down — but its inevitable that he’ll make sure that he gets the satisfaction that he wants from the person held captive

will stay until theyre sweating and crying in a mix of blood and tears and they are begging in front of his feet while tied up. he wont stop the torture unless the person confesses truthfully to what Perficio Unit ask and feel numb around their whole body that it hurts

uses the taser he stole in addition to let the pain sink in even more, also decorated the taser to have stickers of a halo and wings to look like an angel

when they get the answer they want, it’s a job well done for jeonghan

and when the victim thinks its all over, jeonghan sweetly grins one last time to them, turning foot because, really, he cannot do anything to the poor soul

he shrugs and walks, searching in his back pocket for a gun a filled one this time, twirling it around his fingers before handing it to one of the unit members

without skipping a beat, he smiles, whispering ‘enjoy’ and leaving them to do their job

needs the members as much as the members needs him

a perfect balance

“Somebody said it means imperfection and danger”

[idio-cies]

Broadsword Scene Breakdown

I had to, I’m sorry, I love this scene too much. And in honour of Lance’s birthday tomorrow. No one asked for this but oh well!

Also loads of people are doubting Lance’s Altean Broadsword will come back and I’m over here wanting to dish out hope for you all with analysing this shit, so here we go!!! :D

I’ll try and keep things just to one point, so I’ll just keep to the analysing of the cinematography ;)

People pointed out that this scene is a slight reference to 0102 training drill. 

And that’s totally right. There’s just a slight different algorithm on it that means Lance won’t fall into a hole if he’s hit. It shows you his loneliness, but also, he actually does need help and protection in this scenario (to be a team that has your back)- it was what was meant to teach them in that simulation. So that’s why it’s like that here. 

The rest lies under the cut:

Something that intrigues me is that Allura witnesses this whole scene. Technically, upon coming into the training room we are looking through her eyes but then she is completely taken out until her voice is heard later and she is revealed. Also it’s just cool staging to have us see the doors open.

It attracts your attention, like curtains pulling back. See how all the lines lead to Lance at the end as well. 

It’s a visual aid for the viewers to draw all of our attention to something. The thing is Lance isn’t in the centre of the room? As in he’s right at the back and it puts across the idea that he’s in a corner. Doors opening simply means that someone is entering his space. The ending of this scene explains why this is Allura.

It then keeps to close-ups/mid-shots of Lance this keeps us focused on him, so we can see his expressions etc. We see Lance not having much luck in using his Rifle. We also get angered expressions. Okay, I know he’s training and that can just be a default because of focusing etc, but he audible is getting angry as well and it seems to throw him off.

He is missing them. They are fast and they’re small and there’s a multiple of them. Plus, they are incessant, they won’t wait for him to line up a shot and with his Rifle Lance is basically just firing randomly at the air.

It’s annoying, but I couldn’t find a GIF, but you get the gist. Lance rolls out of the way of a shot and I can’t stress this enough, but he changes his bayard from a rifle into a sniper with ease. 

We knew he could change it from 0306 as it opens with him being the sniper in the shadows:

Though it was never acknowledged in the show. 

Slightly relevant, but anyways; I remember seeing a post ages ago about the paladins and their bayards when they form into weapons. Saying how they all still keep the form of the bayard even as the weapon. You see this especially with Pidge’s and Keith’s weapons. But even Lance’s rifle and Hunk’s canon still keep the shape of the bayard as handles. Allura’s whip does too, but the Sniper doesn’t really. It can’t really, It’s too slim. Well the Broadsword even more so doesn’t retain the shape of the bayard. Even when Zarkon and Lotor handled the Black bayard, it retained something reminiscent of the bayard shape. I just thought this was so interesting! Plus, if anyone else knows what post I’m on about, and can find it, please tag it/send it to me!!! 

Anyways, the fact that Lance is able to change his bayard easily like that suggests that it’s a natural thing; he does this often. It’s a shame that we don’t see it more, but anyways. I think this links to his growth though. The fact that he can change the bayard and in the way that he does means something. Also being the only paladin to do so outside of Zarkon and Lotor is... interesting. And Lotor wasn’t even a paladin!

There’s actually a vignette on this shot which is really weird considering nothing needs to be isolated since Lance is in your face, either way, it’s a close up, It’s intruding. You can really see his focus and agitation really.

This is really cool that we get to see through his eyes. The fact that there’s an extreme close-up going into this creates more interaction with the viewers and the character. Also, I have a feeling that because it’s through Lance’s eyes and it slows down, it shows you how concentrated he is.

Things “slow-down” and the sniper locks onto one of the drones and he is successful in taking it down. To slow down this like they did just really embellishes just how fucking awesome this scene is, again, a feature that is meant to draw your attention. It also adds to the emotional intensity that the scene holds. The whole point of slow-motion is that it basically just elongates whatever we are meant think is awesome/cool/key. They use slow motion a lot in this scene in particular. 

To expand upon the idea of Lance being focuse/concentrated, it’s the same thing you take away with this scene:

You see him/hear him take in a deep breath before shooting (where it then goes into slow mo) and it really does let you know that Lance has a lot of patience and focus; he has skill. Though, arguably in 0210 it was a situation that held a lot of weight, it was much more intense. That’s also what held us on edge. They elongated that and brought so much attention to the fact that Lance was successful in making that shot and he goes away like it was nothing. It was great. Lance had only one chance and Slav was someone that was a huge part of the operation. In the Broadsword scene, Lance is only up against drones in the comfort of the castle. That’s nothing in comparison. Both scenes are fucking awesome though and really do show you his skill. Also Lance had his Sniper lock down on a target, whereas in 0210 he had none of that, that was all him, he had no help and he was under so much pressure.

Anyways, sorry.

The thing is, with doing this, Lance is way too slow. He literally watches the drone fall and roll across the floor before almost being hit. He needs to be a lot faster and not wait to see whether it was actually demolished...

Again, no luck. The drones are becoming more demanding. He needs protection and he doesn’t have the time to lock onto a target. Also he needs two hands to hold the Sniper, just like with his Rifle, it’s not like a handgun where you can use one or two hands to be steady and on target. It makes him vulnerable and he needs a shield. 

Honestly, Lance can be really shit in protecting himself. The worst offender has to be in 0304:

You can see how far forward and central he is, he actual goes  a little more to the right (his left) so Keith is central. But look. Allura, Keith and Pidge have their shields up, Hunk is close to an alcove, so is Sven and Slav on the other side. Lance is completely open, not even realising that this is a T junction. 

He was completely exposed and he was stunned in his spot when he was about to be blown to smithereens, probably.

But yeah, I think Lance must forget that he needs a shield. I mean, he could have done something that Hunk and Keith ended up doing:

I mean, they actually replace where he was so it’s noticeable and acts like a “spot the difference”.

Anyway. The point is Lance either needed someone else there to give him protection or just a different weapon.

You can tell Lance is getting angry in this scene though...

He audibly grunts and you can just tell by his face. He can’t shoot back because he needs cover and a proper lock on a target to get one.

We all know what happens next. I’ll show you the GIF’s because I want people to pay close attention to his expressions, then I’ll expand upon it with stills.

I mean, you get the cool extreme close-up again. This is gives us an interaction, It’s kinda uncomfortably close if you will, but you see the bayard start to glow/change and all you see is Lance’s eyes snap open into action as things slow down again *chills*

This one doesn’t really need stills, but upon re-watching and really taking this all in under a critical eye, I got the feeling that this eye snap was like an awakening, he knew what he was doing, the rest of what I’m about to point out will help explain that thesis, even if he wasn’t fully aware.

Right so first look at this:

I know, it’s rather quick and people are probably going to think I’m mental, but trust me! This is art guys, I mean look at his eyes, the bayard is still fucking glowing with the change and he has already cut a drone! It slows down on this still anyway. But man his eyes!!! They sorta get framed by the drone he just cut but damn!! It shows you that this is something that he is not doing tentatively, this is within him; dare I say, natural?

Then it gets to a normal close up where we see his eyes roll around. This is what gets me, he pauses for a brief moment, but it’s like “what the fuck just happened?” but it hasn’t fully sunk in because he was still taking in his surroundings, it’s why we get the roll of the eye as he looks around and changes his position; carrying on and putting away his shield. Also, it’s the only shot we get that’s relatively eye-level, but even then it’s like (if there was a camera there) is below his eye-level.

He cuts a couple more, but look at this. I shit you not, this is his expression whilst he’s shopping up these drones.

He is completely and utterly baffled, yet he is still carrying on. He looks like he’s just ripped his trousers or something 😂😂. It’s like his body was just working on his own; he had no control. Then he continues to be fucking awesome!:

 *This bit here... I saw a post the other day a post about how both Keith and Lance are ambidextrous. I was like “I know Keith is, but Lance isn’t, is he?” Bitch! This scene kinda confirms that*

He blinks and continues to admire it. It doesn’t retract or reform back into the rifle or sniper. Indicating that this wasn’t a one time thing/default or something of that nature, even when he goes slack with it whilst talking to Allura. 

I can’t get over his expressions though. That one with it still changing and the cut drone framing his eyes is so fucking badass. That shit came to him naturally, no two ways about it. That badass slow-mo cut with framing his narrowed eyes coupled with him then being like he just crapped himself though still being badass is not something that he was intently concentrating on like he was with his gun. It’s so weird though. Why would they give the impression that Lance wielding a sword was something he was a natural at? Why did it happen to be the same variation of a weapon that Keith wields? I understand the significance of it, but why play that he is naturally gifted with this sort of thing when it’s Keith’s thing which Keith just seemed to be a natural at too- just like Keith’s piloting?

Anyway. This scene shot here:

It’s a very low shot, the closer he gets to the screen, the more obvious it is, but this bit is framed from below and it’s meant to make you feel intimidated. Also, I’m no expert in this sort of thing, but I don’t think Lance’s stances in all of this scene are far off. He’s not wobbling or anything, he even makes cute little “heee-yas” as well as he swipes his sword.

Yeah, anyways. They made this part of the scene look way too awesome for it not to resonate/be something that will come up later. Also the context.

So why I know the significance of Lance being a natural? Because Lance strives for everything that he does, his facade, for the people he loves, his ambition, piloting etc etc. His insecurities put him in a place where he feels like he doesn’t amount to anything, because he’s always searching for his “thing” yet, he doesn’t realise that he’s the whole package. He is the “jack-of-all-trades”. This makes him even more so. Everything you get from this entire scene is natural. That, I think, is what it was meant to be. The fact that the bayard changes from Rifle to Sniper with ease, then for the Sniper to then change into the Broadsword on it’s own volition, but acting like it had awoken something in Lance and for him to continue and not fail, in comparison to him missing with the gun. I like how after every upgrade, he didn’t fail either, it’s a reference to growth/his growth. 

Wielding a sword is a completely different set of skills to handling a gun. Swords are more about movements. To me, they are also more elegant than a gun which comes across as threatening in any scenario. I looked up the symbolism of swords and it was neatly compacted into this list: Aggression, Protection, Courage, Strength, Action, Unity, Justice, Leadership, Decision, Duplicity. Guns were a much harder thing for me to find and it was a completely different story. It was mostly: Fear, Protection, Anger/Aggression, Power, Control.  Don’t get me wrong, both weapons can both strike fear, it’s just the symbolism's of swords goes wwaaaaayyyyy back, whereas guns are a rather modern invention.

Anyways. I just thought some of those things were interesting to note. Also the fact that under the Christianity section of the symbolism of swords, it was going on about the Archangel Micheal, and how his sword is sometimes depicted to be flaming, it blocked the gates of Eden so only the purest of heart could walk through. symbolising truth, purity and equanimity. He also had that paired with scales, which is a wacky coincidence because Lance keeps a level head about things/tries to keep a balance, you see this play out when he talks to Allura in the very next bit.

Anyway. Now the frame is at eye-level. A comfortable level.

Allura then comes on screen/makes herself known. She steps up next to him, explaining what it is; an Altean Broadsword, one like her father wielded. And then the framing goes to so it is placed above them, at a higher angle. The fact that the sword is the thing that is in the foreground makes it seem a little intimidating, or of importance.

This is where I further put in the notion about Lance actually knowing how he did that.

He says “I have no idea how I did this” and Allura replies with “I think your bayard has shown you what we’ve all been noticing. You have greatness within”- God bless you Allura. 

She turns her head when she said “You have greatness within” with this expression, she really means it. His face doesn’t even look like he’s listening to her, he looks worried. Lance isn’t looking at her and in response he says “I don’t think Shiro has noticed” and his face and head drops. It does the opposite to what that comment was meant to give.

Is it me, or does this frame emphasise how much taller Lance looks as opposed to Allura or is that just me? Anyway, the close-up means that the attention goes fully to their expressions compared to them admiring the Broadsword which we have our attention on at this point also.

Allura agrees that Shiro had been quite difficult of late and she turns away herself.

“Camera” change so we get a full shot of them, at a higher angle again.

She actually closes herself off. We don’t see her fold her arms but she has them folded now and even steps her feet together to gain more distance. Having a full shot of this as well gets through to us their relationship and she steps to the side, making more space.

Lance then puts in his views. “You guys are under a lot of pressure. Having Lotor around doesn’t help.” and she continues about how fighting the Galra may have been easier than working with them. “Camera” change again with Lance leaning into the frame as well showing that he is making himself known to her, basically so he’s in her line of vision as well as ours.

“You both have the coalitions best interest at heart. Don’t forget that. Shiro isn’t the enemy”- oh how wrong you were... But this is also what Lance was trying to tell Shiro when he got yelled at.

“Shiro, we’re all on the same side here-”

For Lance, that was the overall arc for him throughout the entirety of this episode.

“You’re right. I need to stay focused on the big picture” Low-angled shot, looking at Allura. It shows her vulnerability. 

“Thank you Lance” eye-level shot, meaning they’re on common ground; it’s comfortable.

“Talking with you has actually made me feel better” 

“What do you mean actually?

They have a cute little giggle. Thing is about this is that Lance helps Allura out more than Allura helping Lance out. It’s strange because either Lance is so deep in self-loathing that a compliment from Allura of all people won’t make him feel better, or he prefers actions rather than words, or maybe a bit of both.

It is undeniably cute that Allura and Lance are laughing like they are. It’s such a nice, natural sight to see. It just gives you a look in of how much they have grown as friends. But also the “What do you mean “actually”?” Is like, so sweet because it’s something that Lance would probably actually like validation on, that he does give out good advice and it’s nice to see him laugh about it in that way, although it is a little sad in the grand scheme of things. 

Look at that face. It’s so precious. But mid-shot a.k.a social shot. Make sense.

Was it me or was anybody else expecting him to blush in this scene? I mean, to be honest, he doesn’t really smile either, he’s practically turned into a statue.

Then we get Low-angle again, making Allura look intimidating. The shot we have here would also most likely be what Lance would see, so it’s like looking through his eyes. He looks up to Allura still, more than Allura sees Lance as an equal. The dynamic we see from S3 onwards with them. Also, the bayard retracts under Allura’s touch, it brings finality to the scene. Plus what she says “Oh, and Lance, if you are going to try to control a sword this powerful... you’re going to need to work on your stance”. That sentence alone suggests that Lance will use it again/will train with it again. In fact, the theme of control runs through piloting Red and also when Lance provides as Keith’s stability. I think Lance is up for that challenge. 

This interaction with Lance and Allura could have easily have crossed a line into romance. I think the biggest one where it veered off was when Allura told him that he had greatness within. She could have said “I” instead of “we” when talking about what they have all been noticing, also, in response to that, he could have smiled back at her with a fond look himself, but he doesn’t. Then, the fact that Allura continues to close herself off could come across like she was trying something and it didn’t work, but it was evident that she closed herself off because the situation with her and Shiro with Lotor was serious business and she didn’t like being at odds. Then again with her tripping Lance, again it could have come across as her trying something, and the music is the same as with the cute mice stuff, but then changes to the equivalent of the pitiful failure music when Allura trips him. Plus, like I said, Lance could have blushed in response, though the closeness does leave him rigid, but he doesn’t seem to smile either, it’s a weird sort of straight face. It’s probably the “What’s happening? Can’t compute” face. But yeah, you get the gist.

Going back to this:

It symbolises/indicates that Allura is looking at Lance under his facade. She lets herself in. It’s slightly different to what has been used with Keith and Lance though. Allura letting herself in explains a lot actually, because it shows that she’s looked past his facade and really does see him for who he is. She thanks him and takes his words. They leave a mark for her and build her up. She, like Keith (and probably Shiro) know what Lance gives to the team. Then to match that with it ending with this:

and how I explained what that put across about Lance looking up to her. It makes complete and utter sense. Allura has seen Lance as an equal ever since 0302 where he doubted himself and Red called for him, it was one of those moments where she accepted that she won’t be a complete copy of her father (she is still learning this). From then on really she has seen/knows Lance’s mind-set sometimes being a good one (0303) and also valuing/listening to his words of advice and/or encouragement like she does here, in 0406 and in 0606. Lance on the other hand still looks up to her. Whether he really did let he go in that scene in 0606 I don’t exactly know, but Lance is slowly getting there to realising he doesn’t have a chance romantically with her, but he did give her and himself some dignity in 0302 when he let his childish pursuit of her go with the “passing the baton” scene.

To conclude. This scene, especially with the way it ended and the whole scene of him actually using the Broadsword is too powerful to but that aside. You don’t draw that much attention to something like this if it wasn’t coming up later. It was way too cool, and it would be over-emphasised; anti-climactic. Not to mention it’s linked to his growth. His growth with Allura, with Shiro and also just being a paladin/the person he is. Also, it would be an absolute robbery if we didn’t see Keith’s reaction to this😂😂. I assume it to be one of startlement; close to that in 0306 when he made that fucking iconic shocked expression to then go on and lay on a fond smile. 

I do have loads more to say on this scene because it goes everywhere but I will leave it here because it will be way too long. Hey, maybe I’ll do parts or something if people are interested. I’ve just been trying to cut down on how much I write...

Anyway, hope you enjoyed, and I hope this brings back some hope for some people who wanted to see the Broadsword again :D

Later paladudes ;)

[little-chimchim]

Shut Up N’Let Me Go- Part 1

Rating: PG-13

Word Count: 2688

Genre: Cheating au! Secret relationship au! angst, fluff, smut (My standard) 

Pairing: Taeyang x Reader

A/N: Hello there and welcome to my brand new series. I know it’s not a monsta x series, but my sf9 boys need love too. I was honestly inspired by two things for this series; my “You’re In Love With Another Member post” and the song Shut Up N’Let Me Go by SF9 (My favorite song by them) I actually love this so far so I hope you guys do too. Love you all - Kay

Part 2

You knew becoming Taeyang’s dance partner was going to be a bad idea. You were a trained professional and dancing was what you did daily, but becoming Taeyang’s solo stage partner was another story.

You wanted to refuse at first, claim that you were too busy with other routines for other artists. But of course, your all too caring boyfriend, Inseong, had convinced you to help his best friend out.

So that’s where you were now, in the group’s practice room, dancing along to the music in Taeyang’s arms. Halfway through, Taeyang stopped the music to think of what he should put in next. You sat down on the cold wooden floor, catching your breath from the hours of practice.

Taeyang looked behind him and smiled softly. “Thank you again for helping me out, Y/N. It’s my first solo performance and I wasn’t sure who else to ask to help me.” He said happily as he played around with the music on his phone.

You had always liked Taeyang. When you first started dating Inseong about a year ago he had been one of the shier ones around you. Unlike members like Dawon and Jaeyoon, who welcomed you with open arms and fawned over you just as much as Inseong did.

“She’s like a little sister!” Jaeyoon had cooed as he brought you into a large hug. Soon after, Dawon had joined him. This was the first memory you had of the group. They were all so caring and never made you feel out of place as the only girlfriend in their close knit group. Whereas Jaeyoon and Dawon had been completely brotherly and caring, other members like Taeyang and Hwiyoung were a bit shy in the beginning.

But as the months went on, you were able to become close with every member, even Taeyang. Being friends with him as his friend’s girlfriend and becoming his dance partner were two different things. You danced with dozens of groups and stars, in fact, that’s how you met Inseong. But something about having to be so close to Taeyang’s body had set you off slightly.

Taeyang set down his phone down and walked to the middle of the studio. You pushed yourself off the ground and stood by him. He snaked his arm around your waist and waited for the music to start. At the start of the song he bent you down, you had to arch your back as his face moved closer to yours.

It was a slow and rhythmic start of the song. An orchestral beat played in the background as the beat started to speed up. At the sound of the drop the two of you snapped up and started your dance.

His dancing was mesmerizing. It was so fluid and graceful that being his partner was made easy. He knew exactly what he needed to do to captivate the audience. He put your hands on the top of your hips lightly and pulled you closer to his body. His breath tickled your neck from behind as the two of you swayed in time to the music.

By the end of the song you two were in the same position as you were in the very beginning. The room was filled with silence, besides the haltered breathing you both were doing. His face was entirely too close to yours but it seemed as if he wasn’t quite ready to pull away. He took a steady breath and quickly pecked your lips before pulling away quickly.

He let you go and turned around towards the music player at the speed of lightning. He held his lips, his face turning a bright red. He grabbed his phone and shoved it in his pocket before looking back at you shyly.

You felt your lips. Your fingertips ghosted the surface of your lips as you stood there in shock. You locked eyes with him. He bowed his head and walked closer to you. “I’m so sorry, Y/N, I don’t know what I was thinking. Oh my God I’m a horrible person. I’m so s-” You placed your hands on his head and lifted his face towards yours.

If he was a horrible person, you were worse.

For a brief second, Inseong didn’t cross your mind. You pressed your lips against Taeyang’s. This wasn’t a peck, far from it. He put his hands on the small of your back and held you tightly. You put your own hands on the back of his neck to bring him closer.

You hungrily moved your lips against each other’s, hardly breaking apart to catch your breath. Not until Taeyang’s ringtone blared through the studio did the two of you finally pull away from each other, red faced and breathless.

Taeyang pulled his phone out of his pocket and looked at the caller ID. “It’s Inseong,” he whispered to you. You heart dropped as visions of your boyfriend flooded your head. You nodded your head and pulled your hands through your hair. “Answer it,” you told him.

Taeyang nodded and cleared his throat before answering his cell. “Hey Inseong.” Taeyang nodded his head while Inseong was talking. “Okay, we’ll be over in a few. See you.” The blond man pushed his phone back into his pocket and sighed.

He threw his head back and grabbed onto it tightly. “He wants us to come to dinner with the rest of the group in a few minutes.” He groaned. Taeyang brought his head back down and stared at you.

You were on the ground, legs crossed and looking to the ground blankly. He came down to sit across from you, staying silent and contemplating what just happened. “We can’t do that ever again. We can’t speak of it either,” You finally said, still too shocked to move.

Taeyang nodded his head in agreement. “Whatever that was, it can’t be repeated. We can’t do that to Inseong.” He whispered before getting up from the ground. You agreed and followed him.

You didn’t want to see your boyfriend. You were too afraid of your own guilty conscience.

You spent every second you had that night at Inseong’s side, becoming as doting and loving as possible. It was the least you could do. Throughout the night, you would give Taeyang small side glances, only to see him staring back at you. You would pull your eyes away instantly and put all of your attention back onto Inseong, your loving boyfriend.

You decided to stay the night at the dorm, just so you could spend more time with Inseong. You felt horrible and dirty, whatever came over you to kiss Taeyang was a mystery. You could still feel his lips on yours, and in horrible turn of events; you craved for the feeling once more.

You tried your best to shake the thoughts away. You avoided Taeyang like the plague inside the dorm. You believed he did the same because the second everyone came home, he fled to his room without saying anything.

Eventually, as you were cuddled up next to Inseong, watching movies on his phone did you finally rid your mind of thoughts about Taeyang. You remembered how Inseong made you feel, even while you two were purely wrapped up in blankets while watching a horrible rom com.

He was the one you loved and you hated yourself for doing something that could possibly ruin that.

You woke up in the middle of the night, your throat dry beyond belief. You wiggled yourself out of Inseong’s hold and got up from the bed. You pulled your sweatshirt tighter to you as you made your way through the cold hall of the dorm. You walked into the kitchen and stared at the clock on the stove. 3:48 it read in bright green numbers. You sighed and pulled a glass from the cabinet.

“Shouldn’t you be sleeping?” Said a voice that you would never forget. You dropped the glass on the ground. You turned around and glared at Taeyang, who was sitting at the table in the dark, on his phone.

You bent down to the floor and started to pick up the glass pieces. He had startled you when he decided to randomly pop out of nowhere in the middle of the night. Taeyang walked over to you and decided to help you out with the glass.

You picked one up and it cut your finger. You recoiled your hand back and dropped the larger pieces you were holding. You held your hand and saw the a small stream of blood started to run down your arm. Taeyang’s eyes grew wide. He got up quickly and grabbed your hand and brought it to the sink.

“Keep it there,” He said calmly, though you could hear a hint of worry in his voice. He reached over and tugged at a piece of paper towel. Taeyang turned off the water and carefully wrapped your hand in the towel.

You looked up to him and he smiled brightly. “You worry me, Y/N.” He grinned but his grinned faltered as he stared ever more closely at you. You watched his eyes move from yours to your lips then back to your eyes. He still held onto your hand, applying a soft amount of pressure on it to keep it from bleeding.

“I feel the strongest urge to kiss you again,” He whispered, even though he knew that no one could hear him. You hated this. You hated how in a day, he went from your boyfriend’s best friend to someone you felt like you needed. It wasn’t supposed to be like that, not in the slightest. You wished Inseong never told you to work with Taeyang, maybe this would have never happened. You were feeling way too many things to make sense of.

Though you did know one thing, you wanted to kiss him just as badly.

He leaned in, as did you. But you both pulled away quicker than light when you heard the soft padding of a pair of footsteps down the hall. Inseong rounded the corner and saw you near the counter, clutching your hand. Taeyang was on the other side of the kitchen, bent down and acting as if he were picking up the glass on the floor.

Inseong rushed over to you and looked at the cut on your hand. “I woke up because I heard a loud noise,” He said as he carefully looked at the gash. “What happened?” He asked the two of you. He wasn’t suspicious, but the loud thumping in your chest should have given it away.

“I came down to get some water and Taeyang scared me.” You told him, which was the truth. Inseong looked behind him to Taeyang and shook his head. “You’re okay, right? Do I need to take you to get stitches?” His voice grew worried and frantic.

You shook your head and placed a gentle hand on your boyfriend’s cheek. “I’m fine, let’s get back to bed.” You whispered to him. Inseong smiled and picked you up bridal style. “Inseong, what are you doing?” You yelped. He chuckled and started walking.

“The injured girl gets special treatment,” he poked at you. You smiled but quickly looked back to Taeyang, who was looking at the two of you, his arms crossed and a frown on his face.

You had danced with dozens of idols before and none of them had affected you this badly. You were in the dance studio, drying off your face from a few hours of practice. You were currently working with another group for their comeback stage. On top of working with Taeyang, you were also assigned to work with this group, which you were grateful for.

Anything to take your mind away from Taeyang was your new favorite activity. You had slowly distanced yourself from Taeyang and the rest of the group, claiming that you were “too busy with work,” to come visit. They understood completely, considering what they did for a living.

You had avoided them at all costs, at least you tried to. At the end of your dance practice, you had gotten a few unexpected visitors. Inseong and Taeyang walked into the studio, water bottles in hand. “Y/N!” Inseong called, he waved for you to come to him. You smiled and walked over to Inseong, who handed you the water bottle and flung his arm around your shoulders.

Taeyang didn’t say a word to the two of you, he only handed you a second water bottle and nodded, giving you a pursed lip smile. You looked away and stared up at Inseong, careful not to make eye contact with the blond.

“We came to see you,” Taeyang said quietly. He shoved his hands into his pockets and looked to the ground. Inseong nodded and smiled. “Taeyang and I were both in the studio and we wanted to see if you would like to get something to eat after this.”

You brought the towel back up to your face and wiped the remaining amount of sweat off of it. “Sure, let me get changed and I’ll be right out.” You said but Inseong had other ideas. “Actually, I would like to see the routine you and Taeyang have been working on. You’ve spent so much time working on it and I just want to see it before you perform it.”

You looked at Taeyang, whose eyes seemed to grow bigger at the mention of it. You both nodded your heads slowly, agreeing with Inseong. “Yeah...I guess we could do that.” You said. Inseong beamed happily and stuck up two thumbs. “Great! You guys can stay here. I forgot my wallet at the dorm. I’ll only be like ten minutes.” He put down his thumbs and quickly made his way out of the studio.

Taeyang made his way to you, but stood a few feet away. “You’ve been avoiding us,” He said, his hands still in his pockets.” You looked around the now empty studio and then back to him. “Who said I was,” You didn’t understand why you didn’t think he would notice.

Taeyang shrugged his broad shoulders. “Let’s call it lover’s intuition.” He smirked. He took his hands out of his pockets, now crossing his arms. You rolled your eyes, “We’re not lovers in any way shape or form.” You told him. He unfurled his arms and grabbed your wrist. He spun you around so you would be caught up in his arms. “Who says we can’t be.” He whispered in your ear.

You turned beet red, your heart pulsating quickly. You moved away from his grip and hit his arm. He laughed and doubled over. “You should have seen your face, Y/N! You freaked out.” Once you realized what he did, you smacked his arm again. This time more than once.

“You’re an asshole Yoo Taeyang!” You snapped at him.

He only laughed and flashed a toothy grin at you, but that slowly faded when the air became tense. “You don’t have to be afraid of seeing me, Y/N. I’m not going to kiss you again.” He said to you lowly. You only shook your head and ran your hands through your hair. “I’m not afraid of you, Taeyang. I’m afraid of the fact that I loved it. That’s what I’m afraid of, that if Inseong isn’t around, that I won’t be able to control myself.”

“Then what’s keeping you from doing so? If it’s just physical, why not go for it?”

His words edged you on and in moments, you were locking lips with him. Everything with Taeyang had moved so quickly. One moment you were dancing with him, innocently and in love with Inseong. Now, as the sexual frustration between the two of you built up, you didn’t have a clue where it was going. Or who will be hurt because of it.

But for now, as Taeyang had you pinned to a wall, kissing your neck, you were in complete bliss. That is, until the door opened to the studio.

[akiharashizuka]

Yu-Gi-Oh Vrains episode 30 thoughts

Doorway to the Abyss

That looks like some nightmare fuel. Guess it has something to do with Kogami’s plan.

The interesting part is Yūsaku and Ai being able to feel that thing. 

I wanted to avoid using the same screenshot as the one containing the title, but it’s the first time we see Kitamura talking with the chess pieces (only Bishop actually). So, it turns out that his duelist AIs are responsible for purging the accounts of Genome, Baira and Faust. Huh. I always thought it was some kind of program that automatically activated once they had lost. Or did something to betray the organization. Well, I guess those AIs can be useful for cleaning up the remnants of Hanoi.

Of course, it wouldn’t be Kitamura if something wouldn’t happen right after he bragged xD This guy’s reactions are always funny.

Now I’m 100% sure that the character we saw at the end of the last episode was Revolver. Because it is the same as this guy. Same outfit, same silver hair, same triangle mark on the hand (which can be see a bit later). And now we get to hear his voice, which is the same as Revolver’s. It may be a bit hard to tell, since it sounds softer, but I’m positive it’s the same. Let’s not forget the location. It was introduced in a recap episode, but it’s still relevant because we found out that nearby there is the house where Revolver lives. Also, at that time, it was revealed that he bought a hotdog from Kusanagi. And, in this episode, Kusanagi talks with this silver-haired character like he is a regular customer. 

I guess the discussion is also somewhat important. Revolver tells Kusanagi that it’s the last time he comes there. This might have something to do with his plan. If it succeeds, then he has no reason to be around, probably. 

Ai as a mascot...Ok, here I don’t agree with the translation. The word Kusanagi used to describe him means lenient, or, in this context, I think it’s supposed to be easy-going and careless, maybe even lazy. Definitely not “lame”. Though, I can see why these traits can be considered lame. That would also explain Ai’s reaction. He would show some annoyance if he was called “lame”, but here he is confused, because he doesn’t think of himself as lenient.

I like that they are expecting something to happen, now that the Another incident is over and everything has returned to normal. It was almost too easy. Yūsaku and Ai feeling something whenever that core is moving (I guess) also might be a reason. 

Hmm, Ai has brought up the Link sense before, if my memory serves well. I don’t remember the exact episode, but I’m pretty sure it was in the first 10. However, again, if my memory is right, it wasn’t a very good time to discuss stuff. But now, one of them could have asked for more details...Either way, I’ve been thinking that Link sense is a side effect to the Lost Incident and, possibly, all 6 children have that. 

I’m assuming the treasure Emma wants to search for is exactly the reason why SOL is making preparations. I liked when Akira asked for a discount xD heck, he deserves at least 50% off for bringing the info.

Also, I like the location. 

Revolver feels responsible for what happened to these 3. Which seems to fuel his wish to make the plan succeed. Whatever it is, is doesn’t seem safe at all, considering he mentioned something about putting his life on the line. 

Interesting that Specter said that they don’t know Playmaker’s identity, considering what revolver did in the previous episode. I guess he kept it to himself, for some reason. 

It seems Kusanagi did some upgrades to his system. and this already attentions him that something is wrong with Link Vrains. Obviously, Yūsaku decides to go, since it might have something to do with Revolver.

Then, there’s Ai who isn’t very willing to go. Taking into account the previous episodes, I have a hard time believing him xD

After Yūsaku’s log-in sequence, they show Emma’s arrival. I must say, that was a pretty smart transition.

They sure get quite creative with the programs. I never expected fireflies as some of of search program. 

I’m guessing the reason why Yūsaku lost his balance  because his Link sense is stronger in Link Vrains. Which makes sense. 

There’s something that caught my attention in this dialogue. Emma clearly is aware that she’s putting herself in danger, but she’s willing to do so to get the treasure. I don’t think she’s being reckless. She definitely has the skills. And probably faced dangerous situations before which helped her gain experience. I’d like to know more about that. I’ve mentioned before that I want to see a backstory for her, mainly why she decided to become a treasure hunter, and now I’d like to add how she managed to become one.

I also liked the reason Yūsaku gave for following her. Their goals are different: Emma wants data for money, while Yūsaku believes it has something to do with Hanoi, which is the group he is taking revenge on. So, he can’t really leave it to her. He has to solve the mystery on his own. 

Plus, she’s definitely gonna charge him a lot for the info.

Ok, Emma played it smart. She could have said from the start that she wants to go right, but that would be too suspicious. So, she asks the others what to do. Which doesn’t raise suspicion. st least at first. She probably anticipated that someone will propose a game. Specifically Ai, since I think Yūsaku would have just picked a path...maybe.

The thing that could raise suspicion is that she made the rules of the game. And she also used her own cards. Having that friendly conversation with Ai could have been some kind of diversion.

Of course, she used a dummy deck. I don’t even see a reason for Emma to have this card in her deck. Well, I’m not an expert on the card game, so I might be wrong. It doesn’t fit her aesthetics either.

It was funny how the scene played, with Ai’s dramatic Destiny Draw (Gx reference btw), only to make that disappointed face after seeing Fake Trap xD I don’t think this card was chosen randomly, so I checked its page on the wiki and found out why on the scroll is written “suka”. It can translate to  "Sucker!" in Japanese. I’ve personally never heard of that...It doesn’t even sound like the word “sucker”. I’m a bit doubtful, but I’ll take it. It does fit the current situation really well, after all xD

Later edit: I found this after almost finishing the post. Good thing I hadn't published it. So, I discovered that in Japan, a loss on scratch lottery tickets is called “suka”. Which explains a lot. Emma also told Ai “It was a suka” . This is a more word by word translation. The original was  “You failed”. Yūsaku’s line also mentions it: “That deck was most likely filled with suka”. It was translated as “That deck was full of bad cards.” Technically, neither of the translations are wrong. And they do keep the meaning of the word. If I have a problem with this is that they made Yūsaku’s line seem so direct, while he uses a word that expresses a guess. That’s why I added that “most likely”. But I’m nitpicking now >_>

I feel like her refusing to draw (pretty sure all of the cards didn’t have a very appealing artwork anyway), plus the moment she chose to go right happened kind of fast. It’s like she rushed to leave these two behind and find her treasure. and that might be one of the reasons Yūsaku saw right through her act.

Hmm, I’m not sure if Yūsaku really went left, or decided to follow Emma. He guessed that she cheated, so he should have thought that she had a reason to do so. Which means that there is something on the patch she chose. The most logical answer is to also go right, but keep some distance. But he doesn’t seem like he did that...

Either way, what on earth is that thing?! O_O Does it have anything to do with the unnecessary data? Is it guarding the sewers? And the thing I’d like to know the most is who programmed it: SOL or Hanoi. I don’t think any of these questions will get answered, but I can hope...

After showing off some athletic skills and neat tools (kind wish the knife looked more like a kunai, since I always thought her outfit resembled a ninja costume), Emma finally gets to the prepossessing factory. And finds that core-thing, which seems to be consuming quite a lot of energy. If I understood that well. 

I so want to know what that thing actually does.

Meanwhile, the fireflies detect something else, which turns out to be Revolver. That was one amazing entrance, not to mention kind of eerie and intimidating. I liked how the light from the fireflies kept flashing on and off.

Emma’s act this time was plain obvious. at least to me it seemed like that. She was also collecting those fireflies, so yeah. she doesn’t look all that lost xD Of course, Revolver didn’t buy it. 

Interestingly, nothing Revolver did was out of expectation for Emma. Except for the fact that she couldn’t log out. But even so, she doesn’t seem all that intimidated by him. She might be scared, but not enough to visibly affect her.

This is quite an interesting match-up and I’m looking forward to see how it plays out. My money is on Revolver, because his win will advance the plot and also it will make him credible as a villain/antagonist.

[finalproblem]

Willing Suspension

So, six months later... *cough*

Fans have had a lot of issues with alleged inconsistencies in Sherlock Series 4--especially The Final Problem. Some I agree with, many I don’t, and others I’m undecided on or just don’t care about.

But there is one issue that, to my mind, carries more weight than any of the others.

It starts with the “missing glass” scene.

But note that I said my issue starts with this scene. It’s not the scene itself.

Sure, I know lots of people didn’t like that Sherlock Holmes, the most observant man in the world, didn’t notice there was no glass. It was even the first thing someone who’s had zero contact with fandom and had never discussed the show with me before brought up as a complaint when the episode unexpectedly came up as a conversation topic soon after it aired.

And I get why people have issues with the scene, I do.

But for me personally... meh. 🤷 I don’t mind it. The question of how Eurus had the glass taken away before her brother arrived is easily covered by the fact that she controlled the entire prison staff. And Sherlock’s writers have long since set up the idea that Sherlock gets worse at thinking when he becomes emotional, a trait that can be reasonably supported with ACD canon:

He never spoke of the softer passions, save with a gibe and a sneer. They were admirable things for the observer—excellent for drawing the veil from men's motives and actions. But for the trained reasoner to admit such intrusions into his own delicate and finely adjusted temperament was to introduce a distracting factor which might throw a doubt upon all his mental results. Grit in a sensitive instrument, or a crack in one of his own high-power lenses, would not be more disturbing than a strong emotion in a nature such as his.

Meeting your long-forgotten sister in a secret island prison counts as a situation likely to generate strong emotion, I think.

So, sure. Why not. I’ll go with it and let them off the hook regarding whether Sherlock should’ve felt Eurus’ breath, noticed the violin sound wasn’t just coming through the speakers, etc. I honestly found the no glass reveal entertaining, and it’s not as if the whole thing was impossible.

Well...

Maybe not the whole thing.

Even if I stand ready and willing to cut them all the slack in the world in terms of Sherlock having an observational breakdown, there’s still one problem.

Eurus: Do you see how it was done? I know you like explanations. Sherlock: Signs, you suspended the signs.

There are six signs in Eurus’ cell. Each of the three big “panes of glass” has a a sign in the lower center that reads “MAINTAIN DISTANCE OF THREE FEET” and a sign in the upper right that reads “ELEPHANT GLASS / SHOCK PROOF.”

The sign layout may be slightly easier to see in this screenshot from Jim’s visit, though of course the real glass wall was still in place then:

Once the glass wall is gone, the Elephant Glass signs (and no, that’s not a real brand, and I’m still not sure why I saw people insisting it was after the episode aired) are easy to explain.

The Elephant Glass signs are suspended by attaching one end to the window frame. Easy peasy. (And probably why it’s the thing we see at the end of Sherlock’s sign deduction--that’s what sticks in your head.)

But the Maintain Distance sign?

Here’s more of what we see when Sherlock “figures it out”:

You may not have noticed because they showed it very quickly before cutting to the clearly-attached Elephant Glass sign, but this sucker isn’t “suspended” at all.

It’s just floating in mid-air.

Defying the laws of physics.

That, my friends, is impossible.

And that’s the part I have an issue with.

“Who cares? It’s just a TV show. It’s not real anyway.”

Here’s the thing.

I gladly will--and have--let all kinds of things go on this show because it is just a TV show. People who think Series 4 was the first time Sherlock has included elements that don’t make a ton of sense frankly haven’t been paying much attention.

BUT.

There’s “TV impossible,” and then there’s impossible-impossible.

To illustrate with another example from Series 4:

In The Six Thatchers, Mary jumped into the path of a bullet to save Sherlock.

That is not a thing. You cannot do that. It defies the laws of physics to have time to get in the way of a bullet you’ve seen fired at close range.

That said, while I have very strong opinions on what the Actual Deal With Mary’s Death was, her miracle leap has never been a thing that bothered me.

Because even though you can’t do that in real life, people do it all the damn time on TV.

So I don’t care why the writers deployed that trope. I’m willing to accept it as the trope it is and move on.

Compare that to the magical, anti-gravity sign.

There is no magical, anti-gravity sign trope that gets pulled out in detective stories (or stories about detectives, if you prefer) on a regular basis. And there’s a reason for that.

I’d like to call my next witness:

Collider: Are you surprised that people seem to always want to know about the possibility of a cross-over between Doctor Who and Sherlock?

STEVEN MOFFAT: That’s a question that I get asked so often, and I can’t keep answering it. It’s all right for Doctor Who. That’s fine. But it would change Sherlock’s life, if he met the Doctor and knew that time travel was possible. He’d have to factor that into every crime he solved.

Good answer, Steven. That is the Right Answer. Sherlock Holmes can’t meet the Doctor and go on an adventure in space and time because it would permanently alter Sherlock’s ability to do logic-based detective work.

Think about what happens to the show if we accept that Shit Can Randomly Float Now.

“But how did the robbers get twelve tons of gold out of the bank while it was surrounded by police?”

“Obvious. They levitated it through the hole they cut in the ceiling.”

“Oh, right, I keep forgetting that Shit Can Randomly Float Now.”

“You murdered your husband by cutting his parachute cords.”

“Look, I admit I cut the chute. But if he didn’t want to die he should’ve just deactivated the power of gravity before hitting the ground. I didn’t murder him--it was clearly suicide.”

“Fair enough. You’re free to go.”

“So how did someone manage to kill her in this room that was locked from the inside?”

“I dunno. Wizards, probably? Who cares. We don’t have rules anymore.”

Even if the audience is willing to handwave all kinds of cheesy tropes and plot holes because it’s TV, there is a point in a show like this where a line is crossed and logic fundamentally breaks down.

You cannae change the laws of physics. Or at least not that much.

“Okay, but is the sign really not suspended by anything?”

It’s really not.

First of all, remember that completely invisible support structures are simply a different type of impossible. So that’s out or we’d just be getting to the same problem in a different way.

...turned out to be a visible man with a visible knife. Because things can’t be invisible according to the rules of this particular fictional universe.

Second, when Eurus leapt from her cell to attack Sherlock, we can very briefly see she knocked the sign down (bottom right):

And there’s no hint of any kind of support system going down with it.

About 30 seconds into Series 4 bonus content Behind 221B: The Final Problem, you can see them filming this moment.

And if you watch them filming the moment Eurus made her jump, it looks like Sian was basically given a loose sign to toss aside.

“Wait, I saw a YouTube video--”

The one where they said the floating sign was only an Indiana Jones style optical illusion? I saw that, too. But they got it wrong.

The “leap of faith” illusion in Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade (video here) relied completely on making sure the observer--Indy--stood in only one spot with only one angle of view.

If Indy had been able to move right or left from his starting position before taking the leap, the optical illusion would’ve been ruined.

But Eurus didn’t make Sherlock stand in one place the whole time. In fact, she asked him to go all the way to the far left side of her cell to retrieve the violin. (Note the floating sign on the right edge of the image below.)

If it’d been a perspective illusion, that would’ve ruined it.

Also, all the behind the scenes & rehearsal images make it even clearer this wasn’t set up as an optical illusion / perspective trick:

The signs were all exactly where we thought they were.

Speaking of behind the scenes...

So how did they do it? If it’s impossible for signs to float in midair, how did Sherlock’s crew make it look like they were hovering?

As you can see from the images above as well as Production Designer Arwel Wyn Jones’ current Twitter header...

...the Maintain Distance signs were all on stands that were erased by an effects team in post-production.

(If you look closely at some of Arwel’s photos, there was also fishing line or wire being used to support the top corners of signs part of the time. Seems like that may’ve been more of a “please don’t knock our important set pieces out of place during rehearsals but we’ll take this down while we’re actually filming” measure, but if not they obviously erased it from the final footage as well.)

“Look, the writers are just lazy. They probably came up with an idea that sounded cool and didn’t realize it made no sense.”

Ehhhh... Even if I’m willing to entertain that notion to a certain degree, it only goes so far because of the multiple layers of people involved in planning and executing the special effect. Even simplifying quite a bit, we have to account for this making it through at least three layers.

Layer 1: The writers--both Moffat and Gatiss on this episode. Personally I think it’s unlikely they wrote this into the script with zero concept of how they wanted it to work, but sure. For the sake of argument we’ll say they just thought it would be good TV and didn’t care how it would work. But they still had to hand the script over to...

Layer 2: The production design team. Arwel and company needed to go through the script with a fine-toothed comb to work out what they needed to build and what it should look like. Did they see the part about suspended signs and decide, “Well, if the writers didn’t spell out how this works we’re going to have to assume it’s magic gravity powers”? No, of course they didn’t. For a number of reasons, not least of which being because you need to have extra budget discussions with the producers before you decide to call in...

Layer 3: The post-production effects team. They would’ve worked with the people making the set to decide how best to set things up so the support stands for the signs could be erased later. Do we really think there was no point in these discussions when one of them asked, “Okay, if we’re taking the support stands out digitally, are we adding in something to replace them? Because you know signs can’t really float, right?”

And like I said, that’s a very simplified version. In reality, there were actually way more layers of people involved. Not limited to but certainly including the dozen or so people who we know were standing by watching as these scenes were rehearsed and filmed.

You don’t need to be an expert in anything but real life to notice the problem. An intern who’s primarily in charge of coffee runs knows enough to work out the issue here and ask the question: “But how are they suspended?”

I know it’s popular to accuse Sherlock’s writers of being clueless. But even if that were true, how many other perfectly reasonable adults are you willing to say forgot that gravity exists?

The team as a whole didn’t get through making this scene without realizing what they were doing. No way.

“Maybe they just did it because they wanted the glass to be missing and there was no other way they could’ve had it happen.”

But there were other ways to handle this. Here, I’ll give you three relatively simple and low-budget alternatives right now.

Alternative 1--The Fix:

There’s something simple they could’ve done that would make the whole anti-gravity problem not exist, while still getting to do the “gasp! missing glass!” moment.

Arwel clearly thought through the design of this sign before they manufactured it. He styled it so all of the letters touch the border. If he hadn’t, we’d also need to wonder how Eurus got each individual letter to float.

And like I said earlier, the Elephant Glass sign is a-okay. It’s attached to the window frame, so there’s nothing impossible there.

All they needed to do was combine these two approaches and they would’ve been fine.

UK safety rules require markings (“manifestations”) to be placed on glass walls so that people know there’s glass there and don’t walk right into it and hurt themselves. This usually takes the form of frosted glass dots, squares, or stripes, though more elaborate designs are also an option.

If you’ve never noticed before, now that I’ve mentioned it you’ll probably start seeing these frosted glass markings all over Sherlock. Often because they’re shooting in real-world locations that have to follow the safety rules:

But the production designers add them to sets they style or build, too, presumably for a sense of realism. For example, here’s the prison governor's office from The Final Problem:

And they custom-designed the large frosted stripe we saw at St. Caedwalla’s in His Last Vow to include the hospital logo they’d invented:

So Arwel is completely aware of the option of designing a custom glass stripe that goes from edge to edge in a window frame...

And hopefully by now you see where I’m going with this.

If they’d just treated the Maintain Distance sign more like a custom glass safety marking, they’d have no physics problem. Add some stripey extensions to the sides. Or do something more elaborate and work the prison logo into the design. It doesn’t matter, as long as all parts of the design are connected to each other and the ends of the sign connect to the sides of the window frame.

This change would have virtually no impact on the story. The only difference would be Eurus potentially knocking down a larger sign when she leapt out of the cell to attack Sherlock, but that’s only on screen for a fraction of a second as-is.

And to be totally clear before someone tries to argue the point, no, I’m not saying secret government prisons would be required to follow typical health and safety rules for their glass cell walls. I’m just saying that people are subconsciously used to those rules, and the production designers could’ve used that expectation to their advantage to design a trick that would be possible in the real world.

(Also, if anyone should appreciate the value of safety markings on glass walls, it should be Sherlock’s crew.)

Alternative 2--The Cheat:

At this point in the post, I’m sure someone is already screaming at me through the internet: “Invisible thread! Eurus used invisible thread like in a magic trick!”

If you’re not that screaming person, here’s a little background info. Invisible thread is a tool used by magicians to make small objects appear to levitate.

Invisible thread isn’t actually invisible, it’s just very thin and therefore hard to see when the lighting and background are right.

If you were trying to pull off Eurus’ trick for real, I think there would be a lot of problems with using invisible thread to suspend the signs. You’d have to not reveal the thread via the scene’s lighting changes, it would have to be equally invisible whether seen against the dark walls of the cell or Eurus’ pure white outfit, you’d probably have to construct a whole web of the stuff to support the weight of the signs, even if you got the signs to stay up it would still be hard to keep them perfectly still, etc.

So I don’t consider invisible thread an actual fix for the problem the same way as I do Alternative 1 above.

But that doesn’t mean I wouldn’t accept it as a cheat.

And it would’ve been so simple for them to do. Just show some fishing line or whatever holding the Maintain Distance sign up when you do the zoom in for the “you suspended the signs” reveal. Or even easier, show some snapped clear thread hanging off of the sign after Eurus knocks it down. Either of those could’ve been done as practical effects for pennies.

Invisible thread still wouldn’t be a great solution to the “how,” but for me it would at least be better than anti-gravity and enough to get to a point where I could say, “screw it, they tried.”

Alternative 3--The "Pay No Attention to That Man Behind the Curtain”:

Look, I’m not kidding when I say there’s a lot I can handwave and ignore.

This is the least-good alternative, but if they’d simply not gone out of their way to draw attention to this problem it would still be better than nothing.

They didn’t have to have Eurus ask if Sherlock knew how she’d done it and point out how nice explanations are. They didn’t have to include closeup shots of a very clearly un-suspended sign that blatantly contradicted Sherlock’s explanation.

Just... don’t.

Don’t do that.

Yes, it might mean not giving a firm answer to the question of “how,” but since that answer was a lie anyway who cares?

It would at least look less like they were trying to get caught. Because as it stands...

“But WHY?! Why would they do this to us?”

I feel ya.

I feel ya like whoa.

And obviously I can’t give you a definitive answer to this one, because I’m not in the showrunners’ heads.

But the thing that keeps coming back to me is a Sherlock Holmes quote. The one that may be his most famous piece of advice.

It is an old maxim of mine that when you have excluded the impossible, whatever remains, however improbable, must be the truth.

If an anti-gravity sign is impossible and can’t happen, then what remains is... it didn’t.

If the writers, FOR WHATEVER REASON, decided they wanted to end Series 4 with a wild fantasy sequence but, FOR WHATEVER REASON, didn’t want to come right out and say this is all imaginary / a dream / whatever... They’d have a problem when it was time for Series 5.

If they came back for the next episode and said “that last ending was all a dream, but we totally planned it the whole time” who would believe them? Since they had to keep most of what happened in the ending at least in the range of TV-plausible to disguise the imaginariness, it would come off as them having written a weird ending that wasn’t very well-received and trying to retcon it after the fact.

But if they slipped in one thing that’s not just improbable, not just an over-the-top version of a common unrealistic trope, something that’s straight up impossible-impossible... They could at least say, “Look at this right here. It was an anti-gravity sign. That’s clearly impossible. And we even drew attention to it with the dialogue. We did plan for this to be an imaginary sequence the whole time, and we told you but you didn’t listen.”

I mean, they’d still get yelled at.

And tons of people still wouldn’t believe them.

But it would at least be a stronger starting position when it was time to begin unraveling the fantasy.

“It doesn’t make sense, Sherlock, because it’s not real.”

“So you think all of Series 4 is fake?”

Nope.

I don’t even think the whole episode is fake.

I’m aware “everything’s fake” has emerged as the single most popular Sherlock theory post-Series 4. And, as always, I feel everyone has a right to their own fan theories. But considering it took me six months to start writing this post and over a week of barely fitting in a few moments here and there to finish it, I hope you’ll accept that lack of time is just one of several reasons I’m not really interested in debating the “everything’s fake” theory with anyone. I’ll just be over here trying to squeeze in time to write about the things I believe or think are interesting, and you do you. Cool? Cool.

Here’s where I think the borders of fakeness lie.

The events of the “missing glass” scene affect everything that comes after it, until the end of the episode. So I think Sherlock and John running out of Rathbone Place is the end border of fake. (I count the girl on the plane sequence from the start of the episode as part of this chunk, too, since it chronologically “happened” after the missing glass scene. But we know that’s fake no matter what, so hopefully I don’t have to make an argument as to why.)

To figure out where the fakeness started, I look back for the most obvious break point. Directly before the missing glass scene, we had the boys hijacking a boat and sneaking into Sherrinford. If everything that followed at Sherrinford was fake, I think those parts are probably fake as well.

Step back once more and you get... Hey, the part where John and Sherlock make it through an explosion and a leap from an upstairs floor without so much as a twisted ankle. That seems like a good break point. We’ll label that the beginning border of fake. (Which means the patience grenade detonation is where the true wait for the rest of the story began.)

Yes, weird stuff happened at Mycroft’s house before that, but nothing impossible. If Sherlock’s effects team can make paintings bleed, so can Sherlock the character.

And yes, it probably means Mycroft was at least partially lying about Sherrinford and Eurus’ backstory in 221B, but they already gave us a hint about that one.

Meanwhile, if everything from this:

To this:

was fake, that conveniently does a lot of cleanup on some of the sketchiest parts of this episode.

No more questions about how John and Sherlock were fine after the explosion even though they totally overshot the awning Mark Gatiss later claimed they landed on. (And if they did get hurt before switching to fantasyland, that could explain the weird running hospital theme, too.) No more wondering about Eurus’ mind control, which was pushing the limits of even TV-plausible. It doesn’t matter that the method Sherlock used to solve Eurus’ song puzzle was totally borked, because it didn’t happen anyway. It’s no longer contradictory for Eurus to have sent a bomb that could’ve killed Sherlock when she was so desperate for him to survive to finish her plan later, because the second part didn’t happen. And so on.

Sure, saying this portion of Series 4 and this portion alone was fake doesn’t fix all the remaining weirdness from the previous two episodes. But in my opinion, it doesn’t need to. “Fake” isn’t the only way to fix things. I think the writers have left themselves room to clear the rest up with a combination of the audience having been presented with true-but-incomplete information along with characters lying, being tricked, or having other forms of mental lapses. (There’s a freaking memory drug in play, for goodness sake.)

[And I guess here it might be worth reminding everyone for the gazillionth time (never works) that I’m not a shipper (though I don’t care if / what others ship) so there are certain things I’m not trying to “fix” and will not be discussing in future posts. And if everyone could please hold off on asking me what I think of shippy “evidence” and/or yelling at me for making everything about my nonexistent ship, that’d be really super. Thanks.]

“But I don’t want there to have been a big fake sequence. I’d rather have the ending we got.”

Fair enough. Whether you don’t like this whole idea because it feels like a waste of time to give most of an episode over to unreality, or because you were happy with the ending (or even just some of the Sherrinford moments) we got and you don’t want that wiped away... I hear you. That’s fine with me.

And if they never make more episodes, it won’t even matter.

In the meantime, you can just think of my posts as being like someone writing an alternate universe fanfic you don’t care for and ignore it.

Bonus track!

There’s something else Moffat and Gatiss might--MIGHT--have snuck in to support their “of course this is fake, Shit Can’t Randomly Float Now” escape hatch.

Remember when Mycroft said this?

Eurus was “beyond Newton.”

Isaac Newton is known for doing and discovering many, many things. (Including sticking a bodkin in his eye to learn how it works, which could’ve inspired the story of young Eurus using a knife to see how her muscles worked.)

But if you had to name the thing Newton is most famous for, the thing the average person would be most likely to name if you asked what Isaac Newton discovered, it’s gotta be gravity.

The BBC iWonder page on him is even titled “Isaac Newton: The man who discovered gravity.”

He did way more than that, but it’s the shorthand most people know.

Newton = gravity.

We’re told Eurus is beyond Newton... and then when she designs her missing glass trick, she’s all

And as a possible bonus-bonus, the story about Newton discovering gravity is probably so famous because it’s been mythologized in the form of a story about Newton’s revelations being sparked when he saw an apple fall from a tree.

The fallen apple has become a go-to symbol for Newton’s gravity theories. 

When the Royal Mail celebrated Newton on stamps, one of them was an apple.

Buy an Isaac Newton bobblehead, and he’s got an apple at his feet.

You get the idea.

At the start of the episode, one of the first things that catches plane!Eurus’ attention is...

...that the flight attendant has collapsed in the aisle, and dropped several apples.

Maybe UK airlines are super into healthy snacks and give out whole apples all the time, choking hazards and leaving passengers with sticky cores to shove into seatback pockets be damned.

But I’m just saying.

[Before anyone asks: I do have many more thoughts and notes about Series 4 I’d like to write up eventually. Some of those will probably (hopefully?) clarify some topics I didn’t get into very deeply in this post. But like I posted after Series 4 aired, my new rule for myself is that I’m going to take my sweet time doing it. So it’ll happen when it happens. It is what it is.]

[catladychelsea]

First for Everything

Pairing: Otabek x Yuri 

Rating: Mature, Sexual Content

Summary:

"Yuri was never one to care about relationships. About having firsts with someone. Skating was his priority and that was what he loved to focus on. It’s what he was born to do. That was until a certain 18 year old, now 19 year old, Kazakh man with an undercut entered his life and became his very first real friend. And then everything changed."

Yuri looks back to all of the firsts he's shared with Otabek.

Yuri was never one to care about relationships. About having firsts with someone. Skating was his priority and that was what he loved to focus on. It’s what he was born to do. That was until a certain 18-year-old, now 20-year-old, Kazakh man with an undercut entered his life and became his very first real friend. And then everything changed.

Falling in love with his best friend was never Yuri’s intention but it had happened. It scared Yuri at first. Not having any experience or knowledge of this new feeling petrified him. The only person he truly loved was his grandfather. And while he has people he can tolerate being around and that are his acquaintances, he most certainly does not love them.

But that was then and this is now. Yuri had managed to get himself a boyfriend. A very attractive boyfriend to say the least. Not only was he good looking but also a very caring, genuine man. Yuri knows he isn’t the easiest person to deal with but Otabek his whole personality seemed to have changed. And Otabek likes him for who he is.

Yuri’s mind is clouded with thoughts of his incredibly handsome boyfriend as he gets pounded into the mattress, sweat rolling off of his body. They are finally taking their relationship to the next level after many rounds of fingering and prepping Yuri for something thicker and longer than just fingers. Though he will admit, fingers felt very nice. And though he was extremely nervous, the nerves melted away the second Otabek started touching him. Being completely naked meant being completely vulnerable but with Otabek it didn’t matter. He would trust him with his life if he had to.

It definitely isn’t as painful as he originally thought but it isn’t entirely pleasant either. Though like his boyfriend had mentioned, after doing much research, it may take a few times before becoming pleasurable. But it’s perfect and he would’t change anything. Because it’s him and Otabek taking the plunge together into something new and he wouldn’t have it any other way.

There are so many firsts that him and Otabek had accomplished together. Something both boys were incredibly proud of. Sometimes he still can’t believe everything that had happened. It seemed surreal to him.

Otabek was Yuri’s first crush and vice versa. It was embarrassing and he hates to admit it but at one point he even had to ask advice from a certain Katsudon about love and he left cursing, grumbling under his breath how gross him and Viktor were. Even his own grandpa could see that something was different. Yuri never opened up to anyone and was usually rude and loud mouthed until meeting the Kazakh man. What was even more surprising was when one day Otabek randomly asked him on a date. Words were fumbled and the usually calm, collected Otabek was actually embarrassed. It was probably the cutest expression he had seen on him and he will never forget it.

Their first date was something to remember. The dark haired man had shown up with flowers and a stuffed tiger toy, knowing how much Yuri loved felines. Clearly he was nervous and didn’t know what to do. The toy stayed with him constantly and is still currently with him, and he took it everywhere. Even taking pictures with it while traveling and posting them to his Instagram. Their first date was a simple one. They had dinner and Otabek took him on a tour of the city on his motorcycle. Everything looked so much nicer on the back of a bike. It was a simple date, but both were immensely happy. The date ended without a kiss as neither knew how to bring that up but it was slightly chilly and while walking, both reached for the other’s hand. It was the first time Yuri had ever held hands with someone besides family members.

A few dates after that, Yuri had enough. He knew the other man was taking his time and didn’t want to move too quickly but Yuri has always been known for being impatient. “Are you going to kiss me or not?” He remembers the look on Otabek’s face and he wished he had taken a picture. It was a reminder of how he had asked him to be his friend while in Barcelona just as the sun was setting. Red and orange hues filled the sky. The two alone in a seemingly romantic setting. Looking back it almost seemed like a scene out of a love movie. Their first kiss was very awkward and uncoordinated but both were so happy that their lips were finally touching. That night, Yuri had lost count how many times they actually kissed and he couldn’t remember a time in his life when he was that happy. It was a cold night and the two held each other tightly as their lips melted together in an attempt to keep warm.

The first time they had to part ways while being in a relationship was incredibly difficult for both of them. While Yuri knew that time apart could possibly strengthen their relationship, it still depressed him to no ends. Even being on the ice was not enough. They had kept in touch non-stop, texting each other constantly, which had annoyed his rink mates. Yuri had even convinced Otabek to download snapchat. He missed the physical part, though. The two ended up having multiple Skype dates, which was extremely awkward for both at first but they eventually figured it out and even watched movies together, silently longing to be together once again. One day while practicing a particularly tough routine, Yuri ended up falling down on the ice, landing on his butt. Collapsing backwards onto the ice, he let out a groan of frustration. A familiar voice calling his name brought him out of his miserable state and he remembers how fast he flew into his boyfriends arms. Yuri hates crying in front of people, but that day he did not care. All he cared about was that his boyfriend was there. He didn't even yell at the people aww-ing at them in the background.

And now here they were. Sharing another beautiful first together. Their bodies finally connecting and the feeling of their souls becoming one as well. Before dating Otabek, if someone had asked him if he believed in soul mates he would have laughed and called it stupid. Now he wants to believe in it.

“Yuratchka?” The familiar deep voice brings Yuri out of his reminiscing over past events and back into the present. Green eyes meet brown and a wave of emotion bubbles in his chest.

“Hm?” A pleased sigh slips from his parted lips as pleasure courses throughout his body.

“What are you thinking about? You look deep in thought…” Otabek's movements come to a halt and he raises a hand to run through sweaty blonde hair, catching a few tangles.

“About you. About us.” Yuri grabs his lovers hand, placing kisses against his knuckles, palms, everywhere his lips can reach. The other hand runs up his chest, feeling his heart hammering against his chest and a beautiful pink tint dusts Otabek’s cheeks. As much as he loves when his boyfriend pampers him and makes his heart flutter, there’s nothing he loves more than reciprocating and in turn watching the Kazakh’s reactions.

“Yura…” Their lips meet in the gentlest kiss, both pouring all of their love into it. A faint salty taste of sweat coats their lips but neither care. Impatient limbs wrap around the body above him, pulling him down so their sweat covered bodies are meshed together. Not being able to tell where one body starts and where one ends.

“Beka, move.” Heels dig into Otabek’s lower back and he wastes no time before picking up the pace again. Only a moment later is Yuri’s body wracked with pleasure, the familiar spot inside him being struck causing him to arch his back right off of the bed. Legs tighten around his hips in a desperate attempt to get him deeper. The noises escaping Otabek's lips only turn him on more and the fact he can make him feel that good boasts Yuri's confidence greatly. Fingers dig into the strong back above him and he knows there will most likely be marks but he's sure his lover will wear them proudly.

Yuri is looking forward to what the future holds between the two skating lovers. While being apart, long distance relationship being necessary for them, is tough, he knows that no matter how far apart they are, they belong together and nothing can ever separate them. Yuri might not have had a lot of experience prior to his relationship with Otabek but he doesn’t care, he doesn’t need it. All he needs is Otabek. Plus there are so many more firsts they have yet to experience yet and Yuri cannot wait.

The two reach their climax together and Yuri can’t help but press a chaste kiss on the flushed cheek beside him while he attempts to catch his breath. The body on top of him is heavy but he doesn't complain, even if it is sticky between them. The warmth is a welcomed sensation.

“Yura, Мен сені жақсы көремін.” The words are whispered into his ear, causing goosebumps to cover his entire body.

There is a brief moment of silence between the two, their laboured breathing the only noise in the room. Yuri tosses his head back, smiling widely and he wonders if it's okay to be this happy.

“Я тоже тебя люблю.”

....

Hi! I’m back to writing! (kind of) So this is my very first fic for the Yuri on Ice fandom. I do apologize if they don't seem in character. Honestly I watched the series only once and don't remember all of the specific details, so I really didn't want to put many in and be wrong. I do LOVE OtaYuri, though. Such a fantastic ship.

God, this literally has nothing to do with skating in it. It is ALL fluff and sap. I hope you all like that :')

Please do go easy on me! This is my first time writing this ship and I'm super nervous to even post this. Please do point out any spelling/grammar errors. I check my fics over SO much, but we all miss small mistakes at some point, right?

Not quite sure if I'll write any other OtaYuri fanfics but I'll consider it. Especially if someone wants to collab with me and can help me with more details!

I didn't know if I should italicize the past events. If you guys think it would make it easier to read, please do let me know~

I'm always open for constructive criticism, but please no hate. Like I said, it's my first time with this ship.

If you enjoy the ship, come join me on Twitter!! I’m ALWAYS screaming about them: 

https://twitter.com/catlady_chelsea

Enjoy!

[trishgibsontx]

if you have recently and repeatedly been hurt, disappointed or betrayed, I have good news for you

photo by Jennifer Santaniello; logo by Shamona Stokes

if you have recently and repeatedly been hurt, disappointed or betrayed, I have good news for you.

in a nutshell: you are going places, and you are being reminded LOUDLY of exactly who, what and where is NOT supposed to come with you.

if you are anything like me, you love to share. you love to uplift. you love to give props to others for no reason or personal gain. you just have a lot to give. and although this is a wonderful quality, as I mention in my last post, there is something MAJOR that must be incorporated into this quality and way of living and that is called: discernment. without this, we simply can not and will not succeed.

over and over and over again, I have had my mind blown by people and situations that I had the best of hopes for. who I only had hope for. who I saw only the good in. and over and over and over again, after I have gotten over the initial disappointment in learning that no, not everyone has something to GIVE (therefore they take — but really, actually end up with nothing in the end), I have seen WHY the hurt, disappointment or betrayal occurred…and this has ALWAYS – without a doubt – been PROTECTION…

I’ve written repeatedly about how rejection is protection. years ago when I was doing some TV and film gigs both in front of and behind the camera, I was continually betrayed and stolen from — by mentors, and by assistants I hired. it was heart-breaking. I was randomly fired from a bread-and-butter full-time gig TV show because I “ate before the director”. without harping on it, I will say, that what I experienced was absolutely atrocious in many cases in entertainment. and after consistently going within and asking what MY problem was, I was always astounded to ultimately understand that I was being protected. from Hollywood ROT (do you remember 2017?), from many things. I understood quickly that the best way to discern the quality of a person aka energy, is to first understand whether or not they have anything to give from their CORE. and I’m not talking about people who are in NEED and therefore feign that they have something to give — in fact, people who are in need from their CORE, can be very dangerous. I’ve learned that through my practice. some people “loved” me — glorified me — until I “met their needs”. until they leeched off of my former patient list. until they could no longer tolerate the fact that I exist because they suddenly felt inferior as they now considered me competition. and imagine that. after spending hours and days and weeks and months helping someone from the depths of your heart (this finally inspired me, by the way, to stop making pro bono offerings to people months and years after the fact/initial meeting — it wasn’t sustainable for my health, or for the greater good even). the fact is, I didn’t always know who everyone was to me in this life, before and even during my healing work, because I met them in NEED. we can only do our best and see where the chips fall. such is the game of life. so then what about when we meet someone who is NOT in need? THIS my friends, “not in need”, is actually the time to fully and completely discern someone. when someone does not need anything from you, it is actually easiest to discern who and what they are (“Character is how you treat those who can do nothing for you“). in all of my so-called disappointments, I experienced such only with those who had nothing and will never have something to give. they are not full to begin with. and then some people are full, they are just broken. but there is a difference. and I continue to learn the difference! it is not easy. it’s not a tangible set of criteria that clues us in on this state of being or making of a person. and as we speed into 2020, unsustainable energy (i.e. robbed energy from others) implodes within those who can not / will not / refuse to give to themselves on a fundamental level.

when we are hurt in some way, it can mean one thing and one thing ONLY: our future is bright, and we must remember the hurt we feel, enough to not repeat it – to not include or give to the same energy that just robbed us in xyz way. (by the way, all things return to original source, eventually – there is NOTHING that anyone can ever, ever take from you – do not worry if this has happened to you. it has happened to me tens of thousands of times and I have always recalled what is mine, eventually). the problem is, we cling to the pain — bypassing the glaring lesson behind that which produces pain, which is there only to show us our next steps and upcoming blessings.  it is paramount that we transmute the pain, but we must not forget its imprint — for we will otherwise repeat the lesson. again. and again. and again.

so to the good part. the very pain of disappointment is a poignant signal for you, once you can move beyond the emotional aspects of being a live human being. this poignant signal is no doubt success. forward movement. we don’t move forward when we walk around with the same beliefs and baggage (and we don’t know the baggage we have, until we see the carnage of its actual destruction). some of us move very quickly in life, always weathering a storm. some of us never move through life, as we cling to others and outdated systems that don’t work so that we don’t have to “feel”. but if we dare risk having something to give and having it taken, by being willing to learn, AND FEEL, we effectively also “risk” success (yes that’s an oxymoron by the way). things fall apart so completely so that we may not repeat that choice or pattern again. and then we begin to move into our physical destiny…

never in my life has someone hurt me or betrayed me who I would ever, in any way shape or form, want to include in my future. I am grateful for the hurt or disappointment or betrayal because without it, I would have carried them on my journey. because I constantly make myself vulnerable and I won’t stop, I am forever susceptible. I often see beyond everyone else’s next steps and probabilities, knowing what will happen…but if I were to do that for myself without fail, I would cease to have any point in living as a human being. and so I repeatedly walk into the fire. with a lot to give. and as I give, that which belongs close to me is filtered. the more I “lose” or hurt, the clearer the picture of my actual blessings becomes. it’s always a paradox.

I have a strong purpose in this life. I’ve known it since the day I was born. I recall thinking, as a baby in my crib, “oh my gosh. this is going to take FOREVER!”. I always knew I was planted here for something unchartered, but I had no control over how it would unfold. all I could do, ever, was follow my joy and embrace vulnerability full force. in doing so, I have learned infinite lessons which I am constantly refining…

my personal lesson, and disappointing to my psyche quite frankly, has been repeatedly “yes, you can and you will and you are supposed to do this alone”. I think perhaps part of me has not wanted to be alone on my journey. and another part of me has so much to share and give, that I want to see others in their own joy with my very best wishes and inspiration for them. and so I then try to include others on ideas and exposure which they have simply not earned, because they have not come close to making themselves vulnerable to the tests or personal honesty which is required to be included or have such. it’s just the way it goes. when we have not walked the fire, the gold at the end of that path is totally unsustainable and it will disappear. so, I have had to learn that any personal weakness of mine (such as my frequent feeling of loneliness on my Maverick path) as well as my HUGE desire to constantly GIVE to and uplift others, is my crux. there have been endless lessons along these lines and I look forward to mastering one at a time to move on to the next level in the video game, as my friend and former patient so eloquently says here!

much like my eBooklet5, we are attacked because we are brilliant. no one hurts someone they don’t fear or envy. life doesn’t work that way. I’ve heard from many I’ve worked with (who have called to book remote sessions — yes, this is the main way you can work with me again — pending availability) lately and more so than ever, about “things falling apart”. well, the first words out of my mouth are usually, “congratulations! you are going somewhere”. I want you to know this, if you are feeling isolated right now. I want you to know how many times I’ve been hurt or betrayed or disappointed as a direct result of giving, only because I was being brought to greener pastures and I was carrying baggage yet could not identify that baggage. it can be hard to identify baggage when we see through unconditional eyes. one thing I teach in my sessions is discernment for people who truly see spirit before they see human, therefore frequently missing the mark in correct discernment. it is something we keep improving upon, and the Universe always works with us to help us.

the best way to know that great things ahead are through your hurts, betrayals and disappointments. I’m serious. use this as your gage to feel supported by the Universe with a direct message that you are being prepared for your next steps. being victimized is not to be confused with being a victim — I subscribe to none of that and I have been victimized more frequently than almost anyone I have ever met (I would say it’s embarrassing but I’ve crossed that threshold thankfully). being victimized or taken from is hurtful, but it is supposed to be so that we can conquer our human condition and find the badge of honor to take with us on our next steps. and yes, I am talking about significant hurts, disappointments and betrayals here — not little ones. if you can imagine it, I’m talking about it. and also yes, sometimes truth is stranger than fiction. it is in my life, at least!

for those of you who don’t resonate with this post or haven’t read my blog from the beginning, you will see what I mean at some point if we are still connected in the ethers. there is a reason why I time stamp everything. there is a reason that some of my blog posts / early blog posts seem cryptic to some. there is a much bigger picture that is being formed, and this is just my story — and the story of thousands I’ve had the pleasure to work with.

happy full moon coming tomorrow. I send and wish for you the ability to see your hurts, disappointments and betrayals as an opportunity for powerful next steps. as you sit and feel very alone, remember that when “everyone” is doing the same things, saying the same things, thinking or feeling the same way, there is something wrong. maybe there is actually something right with you. I wish for you to define yourself by your ability to see what is actually being provided for you, through being taken from.

The post if you have recently and repeatedly been hurt, disappointed or betrayed, I have good news for you appeared first on © The Medical Intuitive Blog by Healing Elaine®: Bridging the Gap Between Medical & Spiritual™.

from Trisha Gibson https://www.healingelaine.com/2018/11/22/if-you-have-recently-and-repeatedly-been-hurt-disappointed-or-betrayed-i-have-good-news-for-you/

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Trader Joe’s Newest Products in 2018, Reviewed

New Post has been published on http://kitchengadgetsreviews.com/trader-joes-newest-products-in-2018-reviewed/

Trader Joe’s Newest Products in 2018, Reviewed

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Trader Joe’s has it all figured out. The new products, they just keep coming. We’re on a hare-brained mission to try every new product at TJ’s in 2018. Trying. A noble pursuit, a “good use of time,” “what is this, an ad?”, call it what you will. New this week—Valentines gummies, coconut clusters of fun, pretty good chicken sausage, and more.

Organic Oven Roasted Turkey Breast, $4.99These floppy shingles of roasted turkey are a lunch meat staple, though I’ve never tried to bind two pieces of paper with them. Instead, I roll them with sliced Swiss cheese and dip them in mustard like the grown adult person with an expired license I am. A subtle, roasted flavor elevates the turkey from its natural state of taste (soggy meat Kleenex) to a whisper of Thanksgiving leftovers. Good product. Reliable sandwich material. Real meat. Gluten-free. Protein. Precisely circular. Not salami.

Gummy Xs & Os, $2.99In time for Valentine’s Day, we have a big bag of gummies. The ”natural flavors” flavor reminds me of rosé–supposedly grapefruit, strawberry, and mixed berry—but they all blend together to me in the way you’re pretty sure gummy bears are different flavors for different colors but are they, really?? All I know is that the Xs taste better than Os. The big downside–sorry, gummy enthusiasts—is that the texture is too soft. Like that moment you’re making out with your Valentine and finally come to terms with the fact that he’s a body pillow named Ted. Gummies need a little bit of chew, some struggle, a reminder that it’s not gonna be easy all the time. A nice metaphor for love if you ask me.

Electric Buzz Coffee Cups, $5.49I drink coffee the old-fashioned way—by pouring off-boiling water into a filter directly in my mouth—so I enlisted a guest reviewer for these TJ branded K-cups that are supposedly EXTRA CAFFEINATED! “It’s no special cup of mud,” texted my friend Keith, a man who puts plastic cups in a machine expecting roasted bean juice to come out. BA’s Alex Delany described these coffee pods like he does beer, ridiculously: “It tastes like someone walked across your tongue with brand new dad sneakers on. Rubber soles.” Did he really need to offend all of dadkind like that? Probably yes.

Organic Sweet Italian Chicken Sausage, $5.99Like many chicken sausages, it tastes like chicken sausage. Throw in some garlic powder and basil particles and poof, Italian. Out of the package, they have a slimy smooth, bouncy hot dog texture because the casing has been removed. I don’t get how this works, but I‘ll try anything once. A sweet, kind cashier with a striking resemblance to my Uncle Manny (RIP) said he loves to make sausage and peppers with them, so that’s what I did. I mean, we’re practically family. The sausages are smaller side, more the size of Ball Park Franks, and crisp up in the pan as intended. Two people in my household ate the entire package of five links, dipping each bite in mustard and trying to find something more meaningful to say about something as mundane as chicken sausage. Notes of peppercorn tingle the tastebuds. Solidly Not Bad.

Coconut Sesame Seed Clusters, $1.99These are little shards that aren’t quite granola and yet aren’t anything else. Purgatory snacks! They’re crunchy pieces of toasted coconut covered in sesame seeds, sealed together with coconut sugar and tapioca syrup. Okay so they’re candy. Serving suggestions include: casually eating out of a hollowed coconut shell, on ice cream, but more likely, by the handful until you read the nutrition facts and realize the bag is empty but hey, at least they’re gluten-free? If this isn’t impulse purchase material, I don’t know what is.

Previously

The Week of January 22

Churro Bites, $2.49The only thing these churro bites share in common with hot-off-the-oil churros is a coating of cinnamon sugar. Other than that, these crunchy nuggets are their own category of cookie-chip. They have a near-velvet outer texture, the combination of shiny hardened butter and sandy sugar, like when you dropped a doughnut hole at the beach but ate it anyway, because seagulls. (Because you’re a monster). Sort of like giant Corn Pops, rolled cinnamon sugar. I won’t even begin to describe what they visually resemble (😺 💩). The cashier at TJ’s looked at the nutritional details and then slowly raised her eyes to mine. Me: “These are not good for you.” Her: “Then why are you buying two?”

Gluten Free Oat Cranberry Flaxseed Cookies, $2.99As a general life principle, you should never trust a cookie with more than three names. These gluten-free-oat-cranberry-flaxseed-cookies seem to think that they can trick us into believing they’re some kind of health food but we know, ohhhh we KNOW. These are cookies. With plenty of butter and sugar. Because of that, I have some great news: They taste like cookies! Like a very good grocery store oatmeal raisin cookie, with a surprisingly soft and chewy texture (I see you, molasses and rice flour.) They crumble a little, but then again who doesn’t in this current political climate? Still not sure what a flaxseed is, but I’m already starting to see definition in my abs.

Thai Green Curry Simmer Sauce, $1.99This so-called simmer sauce is the pale minty green of my grandmother’s bathroom walls, with much more flavor (and a lot less lead!). Even though a simple green curry is easy to make, at this price, it costs the same as just the can of coconut milk, and there’s Kaffir lime peel in here. It’s fragrant with lemongrass and ginger, and super creamy, a little sweet—overall, delicious. You cook some protein or veg, add the sauce, serve over noodles/rice. What does this sauce have in common with a certain presidential marriage? There’s absolutely no heat. BYO-chile if you need to spice it up.

Tahini, Pepita & Apricot Slaw Kit, $3.99Inside one plastic bag you get four more little plastic bags! It’s like a Russian nesting salad of environmental doom. Or something. The slaw is a combination of veggies from the aisle-land of misfit produce. Spiky broccoli stems. Faded carrots the color of construction cones abandoned by the highway. The curly split ends from a kale haircut. Cabbage. Unfortunately the dressing, a sweet honey tahini (try this one!), which is pretty good, can’t mask the musty taste of the veg. The pepita and apricot sprinkles are a nice idea, but like hoping the 14 throw pillows on your couch hide all of the cat hair, they can only do so much.

Previously

The Week of January 8

Photo by Chelsie Craig

Frosted Sugar Cookies, $2.99Trader Joe’s imitation of Lofthouse’s iconic packaged cookies is the best thing they’ve brought to the new year. The freakishly smooth, delightfully underbaked sugar cookie is topped with frosting and randomly distributed purple-pink sprinkles. Whoever was in charge of sprinkles appears to have sneezed them out, some gather along the edges, holding on for dear frosting life.

But they really did it. It’s mythic, and it dissolves into dust the second it touches your saliva. The minute you bite into it, you forget it was ever there. And it’s everything you’ve missed since the last time you had one, stoned at 10 p.m. in Kroger with your middle school friends who’ve all had babies on Facebook by now. It’s a cookie that will send you back in time, in memory, in a sugar-induced nostalgia nap.

Photo by Chelsie Craig

Cocoa Almond Cashew Beverage, $2.29Who doesn’t love a beverage? AKA the FDA-approved term for milks that aren’t milk. Remember milk? Pause to pour out some beverage in the memory of milk. Those days are over.

This incredibly silky not-milk is chocolaty and sweet, with a vaguely nutty aftertaste, like a burp after too many bar peanuts. The creamy texture, thanks to the beautiful food science that is locust bean gum and other emulsifiers, ends on a near slimy note, reminiscent of the inside of the cardboard chocolate milk carton. It would be nice in a banana smoothie, heated as faux cocoa, mixed into iced coffee, or given as a bribe to children who have never known the cult of cow.

Photo by Chelsie Craig

Italian Marinara Sauce with Barolo Wine, $3.49Have you ever spooned straight marinara sauce into your mouth? It’s acidic and sweet, smooth save for the little toenails of tomato skin here and there. The saltiness left my chapped lips burning and tingling, like I’d exfoliated them with French fries. The addition of Barolo seems to say, “I know wines other than red,” while the black-and-gold Deco packaging suggests a Gatsby-themed party at the Olive Garden. It tasted like pretty good pizza sauce. Sign me up.

Organic Fruit and Seed Granola, $3.69These little clusters of organic seeds, held together by plasticky tasting tapioca syrup, are nuggets of health. I think. No pesky oats here, just seed bombs that I imagine are only slightly larger than what well-fed pigeons expel. The sharp and crunchy texture is appealing to parents who bring healthy snacks to the movies. They’re also the perfect snack for mindful eaters, as you will mindfully spend every bite doing tongue yoga to get chia seeds out of your molar fillings from the 90s. There are surprise bites of sweetened dried cranberries that will make you exclaim, “SUGAR, for MEEEE?” Somehow you will eat the whole bag.

Stay tuned for more, next week.

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New Post has been published on Alienation

New Post has been published on https://alienation.biz/falling-interest-fees-tilt-the-balance-greater-in-favour-of-fairness-investment/

Falling interest fees tilt the balance greater in favour of fairness investment

Investors are increasingly more forced to choose from a proliferation of funding options. They additionally need to address contradictory recommendation on how to achieve their financial desires and the way to invest the savings they have got collected all through their lifetime. If you recollect that there are more than 7000 mutual budget available inside the United States by myself, and hundreds of insurance products international, making the choice as a way to fulfill them ever after is daunting, to mention the least.

No marvel humans so frequently ask the instead preferred query: Which funding is best? The first a part of the solution is straightforward: No single investment is ‘the pleasant’ under all occasions for all investors. Personal instances, dreams and exclusive human beings’s wishes vary, as do the traits of various investments. Secondly, one asset magnificence’s power in sure occasions may be some other’s weak spot. It is consequently essential to examine investments according to applicable standards. The art is to find the precise funding for each goal and need.

The following are the maximum vital criteria:

the purpose of the funding the chance the investor can cope with liquidity required taxability of the investment the period until the financial aim is reached last but no longer least, the fee of the investment. THE GOAL

Goals determine the traits sought in an funding. You will be in a function to pick the maximum appropriate funding simplest if you have determined to your brief-, medium- and long-time period desires. The following accepted goals are generally worried:

Emergency fund

Emergency fund cash have to be easily available while wanted, and the price of the fund should be same to approximately six months’ profits. Money market budget are excellent for this cause. While these price range do now not perform plenty higher than inflation, their advantage is that capital is stored and is without problems handy.

If you have already got a ready emergency fund overlaying extra than six months’ income, you could remember a extra competitive mutual fund

Capital safety

If your primary goal is capital protection, you may must be satisfied with a decrease growth price on the funding. Those above 50 are typically recommended to be conservative in their funding method. While this could for the maximum element be sound recommendation, you should also preserve an eye fixed on the chance of inflation, in order that the purchasing electricity of your cash does no longer depreciate. It is not the nominal value of the capital that must be included, but the inflation-adjusted one. At an annual inflation rate of 6%, $1 million today will purchase the same as $174 110 in 30 years’ time. A 50 yr-vintage with $1 million could consequently need to lower his dwelling preferred extensively if he best keeps the $1 million until he turned into eighty.

Conservative investments like those listed above ought to form the normal foundation for supplying an profits. Because of inflation risk, investments have to be established as a way to as a minimum keep up with inflation. This method that at least a percent of the investment source imparting the earnings ought to be made from other asset training like property and fairness mutual price range. The percentage could differ in step with person and economic circumstances.

Investors fortunate enough to have their simple finances provided for through a conservative fund could do not forget increasing their income with commercial property funds and tax-loose profits from dividends paid out with the aid of listed stocks.

Capital increase

If an investor’s primary purpose is to acquire capital boom, the actual fee of return need to be better than inflation. This implies greater hazard to capital in the brief term. Investors aiming at capital increase need to not be worried, as they will achieve the rewards within a long time.

The history of fairness charges over the past 100 years proves equity investments to be the exceptional performer, accompanied by belongings. This does now not mean you should buy either of those investments blindfolded. Wait till the excellent stocks in that you are interested are trading at cheaper price ranges.

RISK

The investment with a records of the very best increase isn’t always always the only to pick. The Standard Bank’s Gold Fund accelerated by way of 178% during the duration 13 August 2001 – 24 May 2002 (284 days). Judging only by the increase of the fund at some point of this era, it carried out surprisingly well. But would it be the right investment for a retiree? During the 805 days following this, the identical fund skilled a negative increase fee of forty four%! The hassle with an funding that decreases with the aid of this percentage is that it will now not reach its preceding top by means of increasing once more by 44%. This is due to the fact the growth this time will take region from a decrease base, so in truth the funding could ought to increase through about 80%.

LIQUIDITY

Hard property like Persian carpets, works of art and antique furnishings may be precise investments within a long time, but regrettably, they are not very liquid. The same is proper of certain stocks in smaller organizations. Money market funds, however, are very liquid, but the returns might not always be as good as those from different investments. The need to liquidise the investment quickly is consequently additionally a criterion to recollect while evaluating investments.

TAXABILITY

The taxability of an investment has a massive effect on its fee to the investor. When comparing the returns on exclusive investments, the go back after tax has been deducted ought to be used. The investor must usually ask what is going to be left in his pocket after tax deduction.

PERIOD

Conservative investments with no capability for high returns are suitable for shorter durations, even as investment-targets with longer time horizons aspire to accomplishing better returns. Money marketplace finances are suitable for intervals of 1 or years. Income and conservative asset allocation finances for 3 or 4 years and flexible asset allocation funds, industrial property funds and cost fairness budget can be chosen for longer durations, dependent on the monetary and hobby cycle and the propensity of the investor to simply accept hazard.

COSTS

The fees concerned in an investment are generally such things as administrative cost and fee. The percentage of the expenses to the funding amount directly impacts the fee of the investment. Many of the currently available funding merchandise are structured in this sort of way that traders can negotiate the commission.

CONCLUSION

No funding approach blueprint is going to be perfect for anybody’s occasions. Investment opportunities have to therefore be tested significantly before any choice is made. It ought to also be kept in mind that there are exceptional corporations managing precise budget below the investment categories noted above. Some are more successfully managed than others. Investors have to consequently studies investments in addition to the managers very well earlier than investing. Otherwise, they might rent professional asset managers to do so on their behalf. Time spent figuring out the sort of investment you really need is time invested for your future economic well-being.

Dr. Manus Moolman has done full-size studies on the troubles of making an investment and wealth advent. He is devoted to assist all people, from laymen to professional buyers, to invest efficaciously and emerge as rich.

  Everything I Know About Investing I Learned In Court

  As part of my litigation exercise, I represent traders harmed via the misconduct of their stockbroker, investment advisor, or monetary planner. Some of those cases can be brought in a court; most are required to be arbitrated before the Financial Industry Regulatory Authority (FINRA). In both venue, but, a lot of these cases have common issues, which teach critical lessons about investing.

Wall Street Doesn’t Have a Crystal Ball

The financial enterprise spends hundreds of thousands of dollars convincing the making an investment public that it could predict with a few accuracy the destiny charge moves shares. We all understand that predicting the future is impossible, but when Wall Street breaks out its technical charts, graphs, and its exceptionally paid analysts discussing “P/E ratios,” “EBITDA,” “relative strength,” “quantitative analysis,” “momentum plays,” “valuation,” “trading techniques,” “market timing” and so on, it sounds as though they’ve found a window on the destiny. But the reality is that fee moves of stocks are unpredictable and random due to the fact inventory expenses react to information, which by way of definition is unpredictable and random. The resignation or indictment of a CEO, a product don’t forget, an “income sadness,” the failure of a brand new product to generate tremendous income, or an international crisis all will have an effect on inventory prices. These varieties of events are rarely anticipated and occur randomly.