#this probably looks like ass sorry i'm not great at perspective + i only noticed it was the 8th tomorrow a bit ago

[autistickaitovocaloid]

happy holistar day (eve) everybirdy

[summerdazed]

Hi, how are you doing? Uh, this is my first time asking so I'm a bit embarrassed. But if you have the time and energy can you write relationship headcannons on sushi and bird if their S/O is South Asian (or just a foreigner in general). Thanks and please take care of yourself!

Oooh I like this request! However, I’m sorry but I will not be writing a South Asian S/O because I really don’t want to offend anyone. So these will be from a foreigner’s perspective with some American things thrown in since that’s the thing I’m most familiar with. If you just don’t like it at all feel free to request something else and I’ll try again!

244 and Seongjoon with a foreigner S/O

244

Honestly I can only think of three places you ever run into this man and those are on a run, wherever the hell he gets his animals from, or maybe buying cosmetics. Either way, he’s going to take note of you but you’ll probably have to keep coming around or do something to catch his interest.

You’re going to think I’m lame and cheesy but I love it when future lovers have their first meeting by running into each other. So, birdie here is probably best case scenario for that though it might annoy him slightly. But hey it gives you a chance to ask him for coffee or something!

Anyway, probably interested in where you’re from and your culture not just because he probably does something like a background check on you but just because.

He’s pretty busy but would definitely celebrate a holiday or something with you if you asked. In return would show you some things specific to Korea but I don’t really see him as going out of his way to do that. If you ask though he will.

Presents. Ask for it and it’s probably yours. Especially if it’s makeup or pretty clothes. He likes it when you dress up for him what can I say?

Imagine if his cute little bird liked you better than him? Hilarious. One of the few times you see a negative expression on his face. I doubt you’ll know anything about the XJ Company but let’s say you go on a date to Sushi’s restaurant and the bird is on your shoulder or something when you walk in. Sushi obviously going to notice and mentions something to 244 much to his ire

If he doesn’t like your skincare and makeup routine he’s buying you new products and changing it whether you like it or not. Probably makes you sit through lessons so you know what you’re doing. Lmao I had a funny thought! He makes you run through your new routine then grades you at the end

I mean I know he’s rich and successful but are you sure you want to take this man home to visit your parents? If so you better just have them fly to you. All expenses paid by your lovely boyfriend of course.

Obviously is going to make a great impression regardless because he already has multiple masks to wear for work so what’s another one to impress your family?

Now here’s a fun little thought I had. Now he probably keeps you away from whatever work he’s doing for one reason or another. Let’s say though that you start putting two and two together and start snooping. Granted, I doubt this bitch has a paper trail but don’t be surprised when he turns on you after he finds out. And you can honestly kiss your home county and family goodbye cause you ain’t seeing it again

Anyway, overall 7/10. And don’t come for me cause I love this man but he’s only going to be interested where you came from and all the things like that to a certain extent. 10/10 cause he’s sexy as hell and my type

Seongjoon

After the last chapter this last chapter, I have seen him in a new light and have converted into a shark simp. That being said I apologize if these are short or seem off.

What do you know he’s a foreigner too! You, however, won’t know that. Most likely anyway.

Let’s say you went to K-star and met him there. To catch his eye you would have to act the complete opposite from his many adoring fans. So let me set the stage, you and your friend went to go see their favorite newtuber in person. You thought that really the only reason he’s famous is because he’s pretty and we’re being very vocal about it. Now fish boy probably just ignore you at first but if you kept it up he would eventually say something. And that’s how mommy and daddy met-

Okay so I’m sorry to break it to you but he wouldn’t care that much about where your from. Would definitely jot it down cause it sounds like he records and has records of everything.

Would begrudgingly celebrate holidays. Please for the love of god force this man into an ugly ass Christmas sweater and take a picture. Of course he’d make you delete it but that’s why you don’t clean out your recently deleted folder

Best person to share a bed with. Such a pretty sleeper and doesn’t hog blankets. Two problems though. Man is a fucking furnace and sometimes takes up too much room. That’s when you just shrug off the blankets and lay on top of him or you’re either going to be on the floor or smushed

Tbh this man probably smells like fish so I hope you like seafood bby no I will not elaborate further

Doesn’t let you cook. Ever. Why would you even need to when you have a sexy chef boyfriend that can take off his shirt if you ask nicely

Best partner to take home to mom and dad. I mean look at him. He’s perfect and will make sure everything goes perfectly

I could see him flying to your home to meet your parents. Especially to reenforce that he is a good boyfriend and great husband material

I don’t think it would happen very often and you two would have to be extremely close but he sometimes lets you play with his hair and tells you little slivers of his past

Overall 8/10. Hot and mostly well mannered

————

So uh I really don’t know how to feel about these but I hope they’re long enough and you like them dear anon

[ackermanshoe]

Edited lmao: warning this is kinda pointless and alot of farfetched theory and a veryyy long post please read at your own risk 🤡

Edit again: my analysis when I started it 1 month ago: 👩‍💼🖨️📇✒️🖋️✏️

My post now: 🤡🤡🤡🕯️🕯️🤡

Edit: I started writing this like ages ago but I don't see my own point with this writting and I'm editing it after reading @nini14 's Ackerman breaking the cycle analysis and I feel like both of these go hand in hand. So without further ado:

Triangles

Let's see as we all are made aware that aot significantly revolves around trios of friends such as the following :

Although these are the main trios that is noticeable, other trios can be made out by taking some characters from their original trios to make trios based on looks / character and dynamics. And this is where my argument comes in with this trio:

Their dynamic has always been mother father and son. Now let me explain, idk if anyone has heard about the drama triangle but here

These terms can be applied to MLE trio, Levi being the persecutor, Mikasa is the rescuer and the victim being Eren. In the first 3 seasons at least, Eren was being taken away and his decisions constently put him in danger, Levi being the persecutor who always gives Eren what he deserves for being a pain the ass and Mikasa being the rescuer always siding with Eren and protecting him no matter what. Do you see it?

This is Mikasa to a T.

The following is an example of the dad being the rescuer and the son "junior" being a victim, and much like Eren, could possibly refuse the hand that is helping him.

So that being said now that we have an understanding of their dynamics in the relationship, let's get back to understanding a triangle. Did you know triangles are one of the strongest shape because it has three sides that rely on each other hence shifting their energies on to each side and it makes the perfect shape for a bridge, architectures favourite. Why am I tell you this?

Because these dynamics that every trio is made up of in aot is because they have strong relationships.

Someone mentioned isayama loves putting move triangles and I couldn't help but agree, look at how many times he has placed Eren historia and an angry Mikasa? And subtly he has always ( to me at least) hinted the love triangle between Levi Mikasa and Eren, outside of their father-mother-son dynamic. Personally this makes sense to me the most, fueled by mikasa's dream. A choice was there to make and she unknowingly chose Levi.

Now this brings me to the death of all the trios Levi has been part of, from Isabel & Farlan to hanjo & Erwin to where we are now. Our situation before S4 was EMA+Levi = 4 people but we all know that a square isn't as strong as a triangle so something shifted. Eren, even with him in it Armin and him were more connected as for Levi and Mikasa as a pair it was more obvious. Especially in the conversation EMA had in that stare place as depicted on @gilly-bj 's analysis on similarities between rivamika and Mika's parents. Not only was Mikasa placed directly next to Levi although being feets apart in reality but her lines "another conversation only you two understand" it. Visually and verbally divided Mikasa from Eren and Armin and connected her to Levi. Both alone.

Yet another triangle placed by isayama intentionally or not is Armin Mikasa and Levi.

Because a triangle represents the process of recycle and reuse it also represent the cycle of life, an on going thing that doesn't stop, a history that repeats itself. And going back to Ackerman finally breaking this cycle of tragic fate, will they?

The fact that the whole manga series start at chapter 0 is very suspicious in it self. Why does it isyamaa? A 0, a circle that comes back around? A 0 which represents both the ending and the beginning? Why is the 1st chapter called "to you, 2000 years from now"? ( That's such a fucking impactful chapter name gives me chills )

Before my theory start I just wanna add that the story started from a narrative perspective makes me wanna believe in rivamika even more. Did eldians share the same fate in 2000 years? Who knows, but I know for sure Erens and mikasa's dynamic as the impulsive hotheaded doer and their protective calm but strong friend thinker will continue forever just like the never ending triangles.

I forgot all these ppls names on chaoter 0 so PLS bare with me.

The main dude who heavily resembles Mikasa even tho he is a man, has a incredible power just like the Ackerman's as a human AND he can shift into a titan???? Last time I checked weren't Ackerman's the bio product of titans? Remember is science is on a ongoing journey and forever progressing towards the impossible ;)

Hmmm

The little girl who resembles Gabi, who has the same dynamic as Eren, the girl also looks up to his inhumanly powers, a little too much alike Eren's idolisation of Levi ( and looking up to Mikasa's strength I think )?

Lastly, chapter 0 makes me believe it was set in the future. Look at the buildings, 2 story buildings I don't remember seeing buildings like this in the pre time skip era have you? I could be wrong tho.

If Isayama is as smart as we think he is then he might have related this chapter to the whole plot of aot. 🤷 Or it could mean something. And here's where my theory comes in and it may not be the most favourable for eldians. Let me start with the good part tho, the guy who looked like Mikasa is could be a descendant from the Ackerman clan, but he isn't half and half like Mikasa and Levi, he's full blooded. Which might be why he has the power to shift ( idk this kinda don't make sense since Mikasa and Levi can't buy hush )

So let's say rivamika got married had a family they always wanted and had the peaceful life and 2000 years from then this guy^ existed. Oddly familiar to great great great grammakasa 💀💀.

The cycle never ended for eldians, the whole world could still be mad at them for Erens action and has the prejudice against them for a long time. And the fact that they can shift is never going to change even 2000 years in the future. And the guy ( omg I keep calling him the guy cause I literally can not be bothered figuring out his name ) who lives in a far more developed society with richer civilization within the wall. It could be possible that Ymir or someone erased the eldians memories ONCE AGAIN after the rumbling ended. Because Mikasa levi weren't effected they probably were excused and got to live as they pleased. This dude is also the reason why I believe isayama does not consider the Ackerman's as side characters at all. In the end the story might have actually started with them, alluding to "the ending is just the beginning" as said by kingsama himself. ( Wtf am I saying lol )

So yeah in conclusion as I said yes story is weirdly really influenced by a large amount of triangles and loops. And yes ackerman probably would break the cycle of death after all living through hell fighting hell all for what? If not recreating into a heaven, giving it new life. I do believe in rivamika living the life they are destined for with each other but eldians fate might just be too tragic for me to see them as truly free people who gets to roam around outside the walls as they please.

I guess my point is that everything that goes around will come around, that will bring good karma for the Ackerman's and maybe a repeation of the past for the rest of the world. 😩😩 I think I fully somehow believe Eren is gone for good. Unless isayama draws him waking up from a long dream on his bed then 💀👀👀 I will throw myself away.

Thank you for reading 💞 once again I'm so sorry this post isn't as good as I'd like it to be I am sleep deprived right now and it isn't worded as well as of like it to be. But hope my delulu ness was enjoyable at least. ✌️💀

[queerrambles]

Hello. I'm writing a story with a genderfluid character and wanted to ask if you have some advice about how to do it correctly? (I already love Alex Fierro but don't feel ready to write this yet)

Hello, and I am so sorry for not answering sooner! Tumblr is weird and didn't show me this ask.

All I can tell you is my own experience with genderfluidity as a genderfluid person. But before I begin, I would just like to let you know that every genderfluid person experiences their fluidity differently, and that it is probably a good idea for you to ask several different genderfluid people for advice just to get a good idea of what it's like.

First I'm going to tell you some things I liked about the way Rick Riordan wrote Alex and some things I think he could've done better. (I am going to alternate several times between using he/him and she/her for Alex since he has specifically said in the book not to use they/them)

I absolutely loved Alex Fierro as a character. I read that trilogy a couple years before I figured out that I was genderfluid, and it was a great introduction for me. I thought it was so cool that Alex could change genders and shapeshift and he very quickly became my favorite character. I loved that she was never afraid to let people know when her gender had changed. I loved that the other characters in the book were accepting of him. He is still my favorite character from all of the Riordanverse.

However, looking at her now from the perspective of a genderfluid person instead of a cis girl, I have identified many flaws in the way Alex was portrayed. First of all, Alex falls into the genderfluid/nonbinary stereotype of being a shapeshifter. And while I love shapeshifters (mainly because I've always dreamed of being one), portraying all genderfluid/nonbinary people as shapeshifters can make it seem like genderfluid people can't actually exist in real life, because no one can be a shapeshifter. I, personally, would love to see more genderfluid characters who cannot shapeshift, and who are just ordinary people (or at least ordinary in the context of the story).

Another thing that bothered me a bit with Alex's portrayal was that she always knew exactly what gender she was. I often do not have any idea what my current gender is, and I've noticed that I'm far from the only genderfluid person who has trouble identifying what gender they are at the moment.

Okay, now to move on from Alex because this post is starting to get long and I still have to give my actual advice.

So, writing a genderfluid person will probably be hard, especially for someone with a static (unchanging) gender. The first thing you should know is that some genderfluid people are fluid between many genders, and some are only fluid between 2 or 3. Looking at the different types of genderfluid (such as genderfaun, genderdoe, genderflor, etc.) can be helpful. Do you want your genderfluid character to only be fluid between masculine and nonbinary genders? Or only between the binary genders (male and female)? Or maybe they're like me and fluid between many genders, including feminine, masculine, and nonbinary genders?

Another thing that I would do in writing a genderfluid person is to please not make them a shapeshifter. I would love to see more genderfluid people like me who can't do mystical shapeshifting shit. Don't let your genderfluid character fall into that stereotype because literally the only genderfluid characters I can think of off the top of my head are all shapeshifters of some sort and I just. Really want normal ass genderfluid characters (but magic is still cool and good if you're going for a fantasy world).

Also, please please please have your genderfluid character sometimes have no idea what their gender is. Story time: When I came out to my friend she asked what gender I currently was and what pronouns I was currently using and. I literally had no idea. None. So please have your genderfluid character sometimes be clueless about what gender they currently are.

I'm tired and it's like 2 am so I'm going to wrap up. I may reblog in the morning with more tips so watch out for that. Anyway my parting advice is to remember that genderfluid people are literally just people. We're all extremely different, just like the average person is very different from another person. So keep that in mind!

And, I would also like to thank you for writing genderfluid representation. It makes me so happy and I'm also really glad that you're asking a genderfluid person for his advice (hey I finally figured out my gender today!)

As always, if anyone else has any advice to give, feel free to add your thoughts in either a comment or reblog. And happy writing, anon!

[roseabelle21]

No. 1

Requested by: @mirukobecomingbothered​

I might have gotten carried away with the headcanon, I'm sorry! 🥺🥺 I added a few twists of my own and I hope it reached your expectations. I hope you like it! ♥️♥️♥️

Pairings: Hitoshi Shinsou x reader, Katsuki Bakugou x reader

Status: Unedited

Genre: Fluff with a tiny weeny bit of angst.

Quick Background:

An outcast because of a 'villainous' quirk? Check.

Do you have friends? Not sure if you can call them your friends when they are all blithering idiots who want to mess with the spirits.

Does everyone think that you will be a villain someday? Every time.

Is everyone afraid of you because you look like you've been dead for the past five years but still walking above ground? Absolutely!

When do people see your cat do they automatically think that you are a witch? Yes, but more like a demon in disguise.

You shrugged them off, your quirk might be on the freaky and terrifying side but it is powerful.

Contrary to popular belief, ghosts are nice, most of the time. Maybe a bit clingy and attention seeker towards you since you are the only one who can see and hear them.

They are a nice company to be around. Most of them.

There was a time you used to hate your quirk, there never seems to be a privacy when you see those supernatural things.

You see things you wish you couldn't, things that can go beyond your imagination.

Everyone thinks the worst in you, and there are days when they get to you.

When that happens, the ghosts always have your back.

You try your best to prove them wrong, and when you got into UA and placed top 5 in the sports festival, some perspective changed, and some called you a freak.

Though they are all wimps since they can't say it directly in your face or around your friends, especially your boyfriend.

Lord knows what'll happen when someone talks shit about you around them.

They probably met Jesus soon after.

Shinsou Hitoshi

Straight off the bat, your favourite date, past time, and other couple activities are sleeping.

Him catching up on his well-deserved sleep and you calm your mind from everything.

Nothing in between.

Naps in the couch, beside the window, your rooms, maybe beside the window in the common room after stargazing.

You have to pry this headcanon from my cold dead hands.

This sleepy boi understands the pain and suffering you go through the best, especially since he's been there.

Both of you start as acquaintances.

You met him when your cat decided to give you a heart attack by running off to who knows where and not coming back for h o u r s.

It freaked you out since staying out late is unlikely of your lazy ass cat.

Despite your fatigue from training, you rushed outside to find them.

You didn't have to look for too long, you found them at the park accompanied by an Einstein inspired purple-haired guy with a UA uniform.

You let out a breath of relief, it didn't last long as anger bubbled up in your chest.

Yelling out their name that startled not only your cat and the guy, but the rest of the people at the park as well.

Shinso stared at you scolding your cat whilst bringing them in your arms.

Amused and curious at the same time.

Thinking that you took that TikTok meme "I'm alive but I'm dead" a little too far.

A chuckle that left his lips and your glare started a long interesting talk.

Both of you started eating lunch together at school with the Dekusquad.

A few teasing looks from Uraraka when he sat down beside you and greeted you before anyone else.

They started inviting him to your hangouts outside of the school and study dates.

It happened almost every day once he transferred from class 1-A.

A month after that Uraraka and Kaminari started teasing the both of you.

It confused you when they made a big deal about you and Shinsou spending more time with each other than the rest of the class.

It only confused you further when Shinsou started blushing every time you look at him or even go anywhere near him.

He finally confessed to you when both of you got stuck in the closet playing 7 Minutes In Heaven.

It was hard to listen to him because of the endless teasing of your ghost friends.

They approved of him the moment he talked and looked at you like a normal human being.

Shinsou as a friend was protective of you, knowing all of the nasty looks and what people say about you because of something uncontrollable.

And now that you're his girlfriend? Oh boy, haters can run but they can't hide.

He is the most chill person you will ever meet.

But once you decided to talk shit about his girl, just pray my dude.

Or beg for mercy.

If they are one in a million lucky ones, it might work.

But they're not so.

Not even Aizawa can stop him, cause he will turn blind eye.

Nobody talks shit to any of his children students and stay alive to tell the tale.

The both of you are his prodigies, they know nothing of the hard work you both put in your training with him.

You and your boyfriend are the best in stealth missions and gathering information.

You use your friends to gather information undetectable and Shinsou tricking the villains to brainwash them.

In short, you guys are the power couple of Class 1-A and everyone agrees.

A force to be reckoned with.

Besides, no one can pull off the cosplay of Morticia and Gomez Addams better than both of you can.

You rely on each other when times get rough and needed reassurance.

Being each other's rock to hold on and find comfort in.

Shinsou will wrap his arms around you as you spill everything to him.

Reassuring you that you are his hero, muttering sweet things in your ear, stroking your hair to calm you down, and humming you to sleep.

He knows what it feels like to hate something that is apart of you.

And he tries his best to make you see the best in the worst you think of yourself.

Everything about you is beautiful, nothing that is apart of you is worth hating.

Honestly, you couldn't wish for anyone better to be your significant other.

They can call you anything they want, but you will always be an angel in his eyes.

All of them can keep talking, and he finds great pleasure once they see your true power and find themselves speechless.

"That's my girl."

Bakugou Katsuki:

Not gonna lie, he will probably think that you are a zombie or somewhat related to them.

From the moment you walked through the door, slouched back, droopy red eyes, panda-like eye bags underneath, paper white skin that is unhealthy to look at, he was certain that you are going to collapse at any given moment. 

He scoffed, wondering how the hell you managed to get into UA, let alone the Hero class.

Were you even in the right class or are you just that tired to not see that huge ass sign at the door?

Either way, he didn't care.

So long as you don't stand in his way from being the best, which is highly unlikely to happen in his eyes.

So imagine his shock when you managed to score higher than him in the Physical Assessment Test.

What in the hell?

"Hey, freak bitch! How the hell did you score higher than me?! What are you playing at?!"

Kirishima immediately held him back and apologized profusely to you. 

Bakugou's anger at you only increased when you only stared at him blankly before rolling your eyes and walked away. 

Throughout the rest of the day, whenever he tries to call you or even go near you, he finds himself tripping over nothing or his things randomly dropping.

To say it freaks him out will be an understatement.  

However, that didn't stop him from pestering you. 

Constantly asking yelling- at you demanding your quirk and challenging you for a fight.

You're nonchalant response and sassy remarks only ticked him off.

The two on two activity was useless since you did nothing and Todoroki handled the rest. 

Cue the USJ incident and he is finally satisfied when he saw your quirk at first hand. 

Skeletons rising from the ground and villains mysteriously flying away from you when they get too close to you. 

He immediately put everything together and he is ecstatic. 

An unusual quirk but powerful nonetheless. 

Katsuki finds himself watching you in the classroom and during training. 

Finding your quirk nothing short of weird and curiosity of finding out how you use it is eating him alive.

Sometimes, he catches you talking to yourself and it only makes him more curious. 

And think that you are crazy.

The moment you agreed to challenge him was the beginning of your friendship.

He overheard a few girls that you went to school with talking about your hideous appearance and quirk when walking towards the school for training.

A slight twinge in his heart when he saw you, although your face didn't reveal anything, your eyes sure did. 

He dragged you by the arm to go faster and reassured you in his blunt way.

After that training with Bakugou became a routine.

The Bakusquad saw you both walking out of the park.

You declined their offer of going out saying that you have something to do and Bakugou just saying that he's not interested in going. 

So the teasing of when both of you will make it official happens every. Single. Day.

Be it weekends or weekdays. 

They will not stop their teasing even if they are on the verge of death.

Your bond with Katsuki strengthened when you came to rescue him from the villains and when he failed the Provisional License exams.

You were the first one to notice his change and the first and only one to confront him. 

He was shocked.

He thought he had it hidden well but not to you. 

At first, he was hesitant to tell you anything. But one hug from you and his walls came crashing down.

After that incident, you came to each other to open up.

You told him how you hate your quirk sometimes. Seeing things that gives you nightmares and paranoia.

In a short but somewhat sweet way, he told you about how those fears make you a stronger person. Physically and mentally.

He's by your side no matter what happens, he won't let you go through this alone.

To further emphasize it, he gave you a one arm hug.

He asked you out a few weeks later, quietly and all blushy face which was the first for him. 

Of course you said yes.

You both agreed to keep your relationship a secret from everyone until Halloween where - much to everyone's surprise- he joined in.

The real icing on the cake was when they saw you both in a cliche couple, Harley Quinn and Joker.

Mina and Kirishima were the first ones to realize and Denki being the last.

You are practically inseparable after you relieved your relationship. 

Anyone who talks badly about you and your quirk won't last long in the face of the earth.

Katsuki Bakugou is already explosive enough as he is, and you decided to talk shit about the love of his life?

Girl/Boy bye.

I hope you crossed everything off your bucket list cause the last thing you will see and hear is the sound of his explosions.

He once asked you about what your spirits think of him.

You were silent for a while before you replied, "I don't think you wanna know."

You know he won't stop there, he kept pestering you, again and again, every chance he gets to ask. 

Annoyed you told him.

"They think you are a crusty pomeranian and they find you amusing since it's a miracle that you still have your voice after al those yelling."

They like annoying him, whenever you both are alone, they whisper things to you that'll get you to giggle and he'll angrily question what they were talking about.

Making his things fall or mess with his hair. 

They like him for you.

As long as he keeps you safe and happy, they'll keep him safe and sound.

From the villains and the bad spirits. 

Random:

You have the perfect quirk to scare the living hell of your friends and family during Halloween season.

Who are you to deny the advantages of it. 😏😏😏

Various crosses and other blessed items by the priest litter around your room to keep the spirits away.

[quillquiver]

Feel free not to answer I just wanted to say I think the whole approach to "season 16" is very much so an age thing. I PROMISE that's not me calling you old lol I just mean a lot of people who are super into it are in their late teens/early 20s and a lot of the people who are super not into it are late twenties/thirties/whatever. I say this as someone in their early twenties having a blast. I think it might have something to do with how fandom/the ways fans interact with the works is evolving, like me and a bunch of us were on spn tumblr as 13/14/15-year-olds and grew up with that old tumblr energy that invited this sort of mania, whereas people who were older at the time or had been in other fandom spaces before didn't really participate in that. I think a lot of us are very self aware and "tinhat" because it's legitimately fun for us. I'm not criticizing you at all because I totally get what you're feeling, your posts on it just made me think a lot about this.

No, this is great! I am definitely from a different generation of fans - and I’ve noticed a divide in age as well. I guess I’m just curious how people have the energy? Or is it that things aren’t taken so personally?

For context: when I started in fandom, it was something that had an element of seriousness and responsibility because it had to be - it wasn’t something talked about, and you didn’t flaunt yourself because you didn’t want to drawn attention to yourself or the community for legitimate fear of getting your shit taken down and being slapped with a lawsuit. I started at the very, very end of that, and because it was hard to find, and because there was community responsibility involved, there was a code of conduct that had to be learned and adhered to. So like, being a fan is serious to me, and it’s an important part of my identity.

I have been in SPN fandom for the better part of a decade, and on tumblr for longer than that. So I know that energy! It’s great! I just feel that it’s shifted from motivating fanworks to encouraging this weird grief spiral, where everyone constantly seems to be angry and upset, and then couch those emotions in social justice in order to legitimize them - when, to my mind, feeling them should be legitimizing enough! Fucking revel in your emotions, this is a space built to process them, specifically. We made a space for ourselves to do that.

I guess I feel like a lot of engagement in fandom just feels very high stakes now, when it used to be this really nice, low-stakes environment way more conducive to relaxation. Sure, there would be serious drama that would kick up every now and then, but it was never sustained like this. I saw posts of people who seemed to be legitimately upset there was no new drama from the KoC podcast - and I’m confused, because before 15x18, drama was something we all generally agreed to try and avoid. Or at least, we knew exactly who was wont to create it and steered clear if that wasn’t our thing.

But this is everywhere. I’m not kidding; I have probably unfollowed more people than I ever have because I’m trying to get my dash somewhere back to normal and nothing is working. Almost every other post across my dash involves some kind of academic theory or willingly buys into network conspiracy--Jensen’s silence is sexy, but given the atmosphere in the fandom right now, is anyone actually surprised he or Misha haven’t spoken up? No one knows what their NDAs look like, and if it were me, I’d keep my trap shut out of sheer self-preservation. 

And like, I love tinhatting. I have been cockles a cockles tinhatter for a long-ass time and I enjoy the hell out of it. But - and I’m definitely gonna sound old here - I feel like there’s an element of respect, not only for the cast, but honestly, mostly for the community at large, that seems to have been obliterated in the SPN renaissance. I think that because lots of young folks grew up at a time where fandom was generally widely accepted, and now are being catered to, and they have forgotten that this is an actual community, and that what one person does reflects on all of us. Tagging the cast in shippy posts? A big no-no. Because I can tell you right now that the person you’re tagging might see your username and think of you as an individual, but you are part of a community that has been Perceived for a long-time, and your behaviour reflects on alllllll of us. 

And last thing, I swear, but like. The posts. The posts that just say the same thing in different words: from different blogs, from the same blogs, all with this air of manic self-importance that ratchets my anxiety up to 11.... what is with that??? These things rack up hundreds of notes and I am mystified because not only have we covered this years ago, we covered this last week and the post is dated 30mins ago. There’s this obsession with being right and finding the truth and being smart and just rehashing that over and over and it’s exhausting to me. 

And I know I am currently coming off as an old fart who’s complaining about young people and screaming get off my lawn but I am genuinely curious: Is it that I just take things very personally? Is it that everything rolls off you loyal s16 followers? How the hell do you have the energy for this? Don’t you want to process your grief? Are you grieving? How do you interact with works? Like, how, from your perspective, is that changing? 

These are legitimate questions, and this was very long, so if you’re reading this I’m sorry. 

[morphedphaseblog]

The starless sea by Erin Morgenstern

Goodreads version

The introduction

This is just to warn everyone that I'm not a literature student, an English major nor a native English speaker, so I'm sorry in advance if this is a jumbled mess. I tend to ramble a lot but I've really tried to keep this as short as possible. (Short meaning a little bit over two thousand words for one review, I've never written a review this long.) I wrote this for self indulgence and for my lovely book club @readerbookclub

The first impression

This book pleasantly surprised me, it was like a very long dream that you don't want to wake up from. The moment I finished it I wished that I hadn't because I couldn't part from it just yet. It would feel almost like cheating, I wanted the intertwined stories to continue and for me to remain in its trance, lost in the beautiful writing and bizarre world.

I will be the first to admit that when someone says the story is written almost poem-like, in prose, and similar, I will immediately think of meaningless quotes that are there just to look pretty. Characters saying things just to sound deep, frilly writing that leads nowhere, and dragged on descriptions that had no place being that long and boring. Those are the first things I think of when I'm confronted with someone explaining those kinds of books to me, and that's completely my fault. This book was none of that, it was captivating from the first page to the last.

"There is a pirate in the basement. (The pirate is a metaphor but also still a person.) "

I can tell you, when I first read this, on the first goddamn page, I was hooked. This book has a strong bizzare sort of setting, one that almost reminds me of Neil Gaiman, distinctively Neverwhere with its underground society and twisted perceptions of reality, and yet this book stands out on its own as an individual. It's definitely a unique book, one that I'm still hesitant to part from.

The writing

This book has a very unique writing style, one that is extremely consistent throughout the book. There's nothing I hate more than an inconsistent writing style that changes without a reason. The author plays around with words and describes things simply yet poetically. There were only maybe two instances where I thought the writing was a bit pretentious, but ultimately the good outweighs the bad.

I don't know what exactly it is, but I will try and explain through the next few quotes:

"The book is mis-shelved in the fiction section, even though the majority of it is true and the rest is true enough"

(This really gives you the sense of vague foreshadowing in the book, where even though the description tells you sweet sorrows is mostly true you don't realise how true it actually is. I never saw the fact that the characters in that book would be actual people that interact with our main characters. Plus the writing is really pretty)

"It's binding has been cracked a handful of times, once a professor even perused the first few pages and intended to come back to it but forgot about it instead."

(Is it just me but these small detailed descriptions really give you a sense of real world happenings and that the story is really set in the real world. You can imagine people passing their fingers over the spine of the book before glancing around and getting distracted with something else. The professor taking it into his hands and skimming it but ultimately forgetting all about it later, and finally Zachary reading the whole book from top to bottom.)

"His dark hair is grading at the temples, framing a face that would be called handsome if the word rugged or unconventionally were attached to it."

(Now I'm in love with this kind of mental visual, it's fun and it almost plays with your expectations. I just really like small things like these, they immediately make my reading extremely entertaining.)

"Someone in the corner is dressed as a highly recognizable author or, Zachary thinks as he gets a closer look, it might be that highly recognizable author."

(Again as before, this is the kind of writing I like. It plays with your imaginary visuals of what's happening and making them ten times more fun, especially when we confirm a bit later that that had indeed been that highly recognizable author.)

"He walks over bones he mistakes for dust and nothingness he mistakes for bones."

(Yet another example of those fun visuals, I didn't even realise how many of these I had marked until I had to go through them for this review. I just adore this writing style.)

I have so many more of these so here are just a few more to really make this review even longer:

"A portrait of a young man in a coat with a great many buttons but the buttons are all tiny clocks, from the collar to the cuffs, each reading different times."

"His face is so much more than hair and eye colour, she wonders why books do not describe the curves of noses or the length of the eyelashes. She studies the shape of his lips. Perhaps a face is too complicated to capture in words."

"There are dozens of giant statues. Some figures have animal heads and others have list their heads entirely. They are listed throughout the space in a way that looks so organic that Zachary would not be surprised if they moved, or perhaps they are moving, very, very slowly."

"The figure in the chair is carved from snow and ice. As her gown cascades down around the chair the ripples in the fabric become waves, and within waves there are ships and sailors and sea monsters and then the sea within her gown is lost in the drifting snow."

"Allegra watches him with studied interest from the other end of the table, the way one watches a tiger in a zoo or possibly the way the tiger watches the tourists."

"It sounds strange and empty now, in her head. Rhyme can hear the hum of the past stories though they are low and quiet, the stories always calm once they have been written down whether they are past stories or present stories or future stories.

It is the absence of the high-pitched stories of the future that is the most strange. There is the thrum of what will pass in the next few minutes buzzing in her ears- so faint compared to the tales layered upon tales that she once heard- and then nothing. Then this place will have no more tales to tell." .

(Probably one of my favourites, it really highlights everything I like about this style of writing.)

Another kind of writing style I noticed in the book was an abundance of making things literally feel alive, giving human emotions to objects, personification. I don't come across this too often in other books, and when it happens it isn't repeated as often in that same book,since it tends to get old, but as we have already learned Erin Morgenstern never makes this boring. She plays around with this and never seems to stop, adding another layer to her writing cake. I love how she gives these characteristics to even the smallest of crevices hidden in shadows, something just people wouldn't even think of.

"He takes his torch and explores the shadows, away from the doors and the tent, among jagged crystals and forgotten architecture. He carries the light into places long unfamiliar with illumination that accept it like a half-remembered dream."

"Outside the inn the wind howls, confused by this turn of events. (The wind does not like to be confused. Confusion ruins it's sense of direction and direction is everything to the wind.)"

"The wind howls after him as he leaves in fear of what is to come, but a mortal cannot understand the wishes of the wind no matter how loud it cries and so these final warnings go unheeded."

"If the sword could sigh with relief as it is taken from its scabbard it would, for it has been lost and found so many times before and it knows this time will be the last."

One more thing that caught my eye in the writing was also the composition, where we technically start with in medias Res. We find out by the end of the book that everything that has happened was one big ass story wrapped in stories and overlapped with other stories. So Zachary literally comes in not even in the middle of the story, but at the very end that has been overdue for quite some time. This makes for a very interesting storyline as all the other storylines intertwine into eachother, it makes for an even more interesting read as our MC comes in only when the plot is at its end, tipping over the very edge.

(I also got the feeling that the entire book is almost told through the perspective of the story, if that makes any sense whatsoever. It's almost like the story, that is bound together like the most complicated twister game, is alive and is smiling over our characters smugly waiting for everything to run its course. Like an omnipresent god, that's at least the vibe I got reading the book. )

The world building

Now in my opinion the world building goes hand in hand with the writing in this book. Every detail I mentioned before builds the atmosphere and the base of all the world building in this book. The way the plot is written is written also contributes to the world building, as all the stories overlap and meet at the very end. The looping plot line is actually my number one favourite thing in the entire book.

There isn't that much to say except 'what the hell is going on?' in the best way possible, to the world building, because as confusing as it can be it's amazing to read and I think that it's one of my favourite aspects of the book.

The Characters

Now is time for the weakest part of the book, its characters, who even though I think are amazing, are definitely flatter than everything else in the book.

In my opinion most characters personalities I just can't pinpoint, and even though this personally doesn't take away from my enjoyment too much, I know a lot of people love well defined character personalities.

For some characters I can understand the constant change in character, like Mirabel, whose multiple lifetimes make it so it makes sense why her personalities overlap and make little sense. She constantly felt a bit inconsistent to me, but again I personally didn't think it ruined the book.

The most well developed personalities I could feel were Kat and the keeper, and at times Dorian. Zachary is a weird gray area for me, because even though I loved his character, I can't really tell who he is besides the son of the fortuneteller. I think that most of the character building was sacrificed to make the plot and the world feel alive. As I said before, it feels like the omnipresent god and the world is more developed than any of the characters personalities.

I usually love marking all 'character moments' where I feel like I can understand what kind of person the character is, their sense of humour, friendship, socializing, thinking and so on. But I found myself marking basically nothing of that kind in this book, just the beautiful descriptions of the world. The story was just more alive than the characters in it.

I liked all the romances even though they all lacked some depth, but the fairytale style writing of the romance definitely made them extremely enjoyable. If it weren't for the fairytale vibe all the romance would have been just flat, and I  wouldn’t be invested at all.

The Conclusion

I wouldn't reccomend this book for everyone, as I think great many people wouldn't be fans of the writing, and so the lack of character depth wouldn't help either and there would be no good to outweigh the bad. I truly think this book is a perfect 4 starts but to me personally it is 5 stars. I am just such a big fan of the looping storyline, I still haven't gotten over that. To finish it all off here are a few extra quotes that I liked:

"No one takes responsibility. Everyone assumes someone else will do it, so no one does."

"It is critical to steep the tests in ignorance to result in uncorrupted responses."

"They all have similar elements, though. All stories do, no matter what form they take. Something was, and then something changed. Change is what a story is, after all."

[lalesath-blog]

In the post Vnc vs Pandora Hearts, you said the all the PH characters felt "whole" I'm planning on making a novel of some sort and want to know what you mean by "whole" can you give me like a long-ass paragraph of what is whole and what is not? Or what is it that made you feel the characters were "whole"? Thank you!😘

Oh dear lord, anon. Okay. Before we start, let me just tack on a disclaimer saying that… where as I believe most of what I’m about to say is generally accepted/“fact” some things may undoubtedly be or sound more subjective. So just keep in mind that this is my own perspective on the matter. Also: PANDORA HEARTS SPOILERS (since I assume you’ve read it?)

This is kind of a … tricky thing to answer. Saying “they should feel like a real person” is unhelpfully vague. Not to mention, plenty of real people are decidedly shallow;;

Achieving realistic characters starts with knowing them as the writer. Really knowing them. Knowing where they grew up. What their first pet was. What they eat as comfort food. What their “mindless” habits are. How many nicknames they’ve had. How many nicknames still remain. The feeling they get when they think of the nickname they haven’t heard spoken for 6 years because the only person who ever used it walked out of their life…. Obviously I just mean to say that you should KNOW your characters. Even seemingly trivial details. I’m not saying you have to know what color nail polish your character wears on Wednesdays, but getting a grasp on little things can shed a little light on personality quirks/habits that will make your character more nuanced.

Lots of little details tend to form tangible, meaningful results. Combine that with some original plot details and voilà~ Example: Knowing Sharon is very much into romance content gives some insight into how easily flustered and excitable she gets even regarding her interactions with Break. How she reacts to Alice’s curiosity and her kiss with Oz. She’s a romantic. In more than one sense. Which means she’s also going to be insecure about her body not developing… which ties into a plot detail about legal contracts.

—-Another really obvious thing… is that they need to grow. Develop. And despite popular belief, this development doesn’t have to be positive. There simply has to be a discernible process of getting from point A to point B. Sometimes this is more subtle (especially with secondary characters). And sometimes this is abrupt… but there always has to be meaning to it.

Example: Something I really, really loved… not to break anyone’s heart again… was Elliot’s flip. He was adamantly against self-sacrifice in the beginning of the manga. He tore into Oz, trying to communicate that that way of thinking was harmful/disrespectful to the people he cared about. And how that kind of thinking was inherently selfish/self-righteous and would only hurt the people he claimed to love… And Oz trying to claim that it would be FOR them.

Cut to Elliot choosing to sacrifice his own life to “end the nightmare” (so to speak)… and even to save Oz the burden of having to kill him.“I’m sorry, Leo.”

(I’m not crying… You’re crying).

—-In general though, I think being able to make your reader feel sympathy or EMPATHY for your characters is extremely important. ESPECIALLY when it comes to antagonists, imo. There’s nothing worse than a flat villain. If you don’t care about the source causing your protagonist to struggle, you can’t really take the story seriously, you know? And I cared about every damn character in PH. No matter which side they were leaning towards at any given time.

And characters should engage the reader. Cause them to think. Always. If you have someone questioning their own morality, you’ve hit god tier (Psycho Pass and Code Geass hit me hard with this). Make your characters convince me. All of them. Of everything. If I can’t be convinced they’re right, I at least need to understand. Which usually means delving into multiple layers of emotions. Example:–What does Vincent Want?Vince Wants to Erase His Existence For GilBecause He Wants Gil To Be HappyBecause Gil Never Abandoned Him–Why would he think Gil should abandon him?Because he was a child of misfortune born to parents who abandoned him/them and he felt he was nothing but a burden on his brother.–Why is he willing to go as far as killing himself?Because, due to the above, he never had a sense of self-worth in the first place… and the further trauma/guilt he sustained after the tragedy of sablier made it all the worse.

~~~Multiple Layers & Repeating Patterns~~~ Makes him feel super real, doesn’t it?And sure, Vincent comes across as an asshole a lot of the time… especially early on. But did I cry over his feelings for Gil and when he hugged Ada? You bet I did. Not to mention, I had Echo’s perspective of him as well. Which is another important detail. Characters adding more dimensions to each other through their various povs. 

Aaand now to the super obvious. Characters should have both negative/positive bits. Protagonists generally lean WAY TOO FAR onto the positive side (for me)… minus their one (1) hang-up. Which is usually a simple, easily explainable complex. Like the overly generic [UNDERDOG] issue…. ANYWAY.

People have flaws. People have insecurities. People have bad habits and different ways of reacting to conflict. Different reasons for acting the way they do. Make sure you know them. Example:Leo, for instance, comes across as being subdued. But he’s more volatile than Elliot. Why does he present as subdued? Because in their context, Elliot’s fire tends to put his out. How does Leo confront conflict? By literally letting someone else take control from him while he tries to ignore it. He’s been an escapist his entire life. Hair in his eyes. Glasses that block his vision. Books to distract himself with. Etc. It’s a reoccurring theme with Leo even in his day-to-day demeanor… which means it was important to know from the get-go.

And to cont. from a bit above… everyone also has bits of light. Even a sociopath. Maybe you create a sociopathic serial killer who, every Thursday, leaves a homeless boy a bag of take-out in the alley behind the restaurant the killer and his ex used to visit… before he killed them. The boy had seen him do it, yet hadn’t screamed or alerted anyone. And now your killer practices this sentimental ritual that he doesn’t understand. Maybe, by the end, he forms his own understanding.I think making the reader feel curious never hurts. Make them form questions they want answers to. Even little ones. If I never wonder about ANYTHING, there’s probably not enough detail. I’m not even saying there have to be definitive answers just… I want to notice things. Like why is break always eating candy? Does he actually like sweet things? He didn’t SEEM the type in the past? Is it just to compensate for his former personality? Is it because of Shelly? Is it a shout-out to Emily? Like with the doll? Did he used to smoke? Also he doesn’t drink??? Why? 

Really good characters? It’s like looking at them through a prism. By the end, you’ve seem them in a dozen shades of light. Example:

—-Xerxes Break:The MentorThe Loyal ServantThe Protector/The KnightThe Serial KillerThe VictimThe Wild CardThe Suicide RiskThe Comic Relief The BAMFThe Needy ChildThe Cold, Near-RecluseThe Brother FigureThe Partner  The Unhinged ClownThe [Tragic] HeroEtc.

He’s played dozens of roles on his own and through his relationships with other characters. Some of which are exceedingly different.

When you really get down to it, I think I personally also love the characters in PH so much because I can find something to relate to in all of them.Whether it be Lacie’s otherworldy dissociation, Leo’s escapist tendencies, Sharon’s drunken queen play, Oswald’s bluntness, or Vincent’s self-worth issues… I just. They feel like so much more? From their quirks & hobbies (Ada’s what… VOODOO room? hahaha/the trio of book nerds/Break and his doll… and his candy/Alice and being a massive carnivore/Gil smoking to emulate Oscar… and being afraid of cats/Elliot secretly ADORING cats but not wanting to admit it;;). To their contradictions. Their incorrect views on themselves. And on each other. The various self-realizations. The great dialogue. Just… asdfghjkl

ARGH. It’s SO hard to explain. Just. Characters are more than their goals and their easily definable trope traits. They’re more than their role in the story they’re in and that should come across.