#this time its doing my fav thing (/s) where the screen turns black i i have to hpld down the power button until it turns back on

[sleepingcatemojis]

guess whats happening again?

my phones ran out of storage and i can’t work on anything, so mojis might have to wait for a bit.

[goodwriterwithbadhabits]

Flight of the Little Bird: Three Months Later.

Previous | Master List 

Its the end! I know I said I’d have this up a few hours ago, but at least I finished it, right? (I’m still so sorry about the Late At Night series, I swear I’m still working on it.)

~~

“Dad, stop being mean to the bees.” Your laugh rings out across the large garden as you watch your father try to catch the bees buzzing around his tomatoes. “They’re friends.” 

“You wouldn’t say that if they were hornets.” He counters, adjusting the straw hat he was wearing. You both grin at his words, squinting due to the southern California sun. You had missed this place, with its sprawling land, the old adobe mansion your grandfather had bought so many decades ago, and even the bees that always returned to your father’s precious garden every summer. 

“Hornets are bastards, its different.” You point out, returning your attention to the pumpkins you were weeding. “How long do you think it’ll be until these babies are ready for the market?” You wonder, gently caressing the squash in front of you. 

“Not until early October at the earliest, we could sell them for Jack-o-lanterns” He informs you, finally leaving the bees alone to check his other garden inhabitants. “These cucumbers might be ready next week though.” 

“The bell peppers too,” You stand up, pointing to the section of garden he had set aside for his varied peppers. “We should check the mushrooms as well, I could make stuffed bell peppers and-”

“Honey!” Your mother’s voice has both of you looking back towards the house, and you can tell from the way she’s fiddling with her wedding ring that something is wrong. 

“What’s wrong, mom?” You call, and she immediately waves your concerns away. 

“Its nothing sweetie, I just need to talk to your father.” You don’t believe her, but still shrug it off anyway. You share a look with your old man, who’s clearly as confused as you are, “Don’t worry, we’re almost done weeding, I’ll finish up the pumpkins and go check the shrooms.” 

“Alright, thank you.” He tips his hat dramatically to you before following his wife inside the house. Weeding takes only a few minutes, so you find yourself meandering towards the front of the house to find the mushrooms before either of your parents have made it back outside. 

You wish they had come out to stop you.

The moment you round the side of the house, you’re met with two large black vans, a sight so familiar to you that for a moment you’re excited, wondering where you’re about to be whisked off next. Then, you remember. 

It had already been three months since you had left, and the boys hadn’t contacted you once, not even Mark, which hurt most of all. You had no doubt they probably hated you, so what were these vans doing here? Were you about to be kidnapped?

“Please, just hear us out.” A familiar voice begged. 

“Not a chance. If you had wanted to talk to her you should have called first, don’t think she’ll want to see you just because you showed up at her house.” Your mother argued, voice stern, a rare occurrence. Slowly the crowd of boys were backed out of the house, though none of them had noticed you yet. 

“Mom-” 

“Mark Tuan, don’t you dare “mom” me right now. You think you can just ghost my daughter for three months and I’ll welcome you back with open arms? It’s your fault she got her heart broken in the first place. If you think I’ll just forgive you in an instant-”

“Mom.” This time, it was you who called to her, making her stop and all of them looked over to you. Seeing you must have been a shock, the last time you had all been together you wore only designer clothes, stylish pants and dresses, things that screamed money. Now, you stood before them in dirty overalls and a work out tank top you had stolen from Jackson years ago. Your hat blocked the sun from your eyes, but you knew you looked tanner than before, having spent almost every day in the sunshine. 

“Oh honey, you were supposed to stay in the garden.” Your mom sighs, clearly distressed. 

“Mom, go inside.” 

“But-”

“Mom.” You say more firmly, finally tearing your gaze away from the boys to look at her. “I’m a big girl, I can handle my own problems. Go inside please.” She doesn’t say anything, just nods and turns around to head back inside. The moment the door closes, the boys surge forward, but your step backwards has them stopping. “Why are you here? My mom was right, you don’t make a single effort to contact me, and you just show up?”

“You really think you get to be upset right now?” Jinyoung asks. 

“Yes I do.” You retort immediately. “I apologized several times. I explained I was leaving the company but you were all still free to contact me, and none of you did. So yeah, I think I’m allowed to be upset.” 

“I’m sorry.” Mark pipes up, stepping forward to stand at the front of the group. “We were shitty friends, and I’m so sorry for that, but that isn’t why we’re here.”

“Then why are you here?” 

“We want you to come back, to come home.” Youngjae finally admits, voice small. There was no humor in your laugh as it bubbled up. 

“I am home.” You manage to say, throwing out your arms to gesture to the property. “Do you even understand why I left?” 

“Y/n.” JB tries to start but you stop him. 

“I left because your beloved Aghase turned on me and Jackson the moment they found out about us. They’ve always hated me. Every time I’ve been seen by them they spew nothing but hate and that takes a toll. I can’t do that anymore.” 

“They don’t hate you.” Mark almost yells. “And who cares if they do? We’ve spent three months trying to accept what you did but you didn’t think about how we would feel.” Mark was angry, a sight you had seen a few times, but had never been towards you. “You expected us to just forget about you, to move on. I have been your best friend for over two decades!” His heart broken shout made tears immediately spring into your eyes. “I would have understood backing away from the group, or even lying to the public about your relationship, but running away? That’s not like you.” 

“You didn’t try to stop me.” 

“Because I thought I would be okay!” He was crying now, and you felt about to but you tried your best not to let it break you completely. “I thought we would all be okay and I would just be upset for a while until I could see you again, but it wasn’t just me. Everyone has been upset, everyone has been hurt and it was your selfishness that did it!” 

“I did it for you, to protect you from those assholes who called themselves your fans!”

“That’s enough! Both of you!” Jackson interjects, stepping in between you. “You are both right, and both wrong.”

“Have you not been on social media at all since you got here?” Jinyoung asks casually, earning a shake of the head from you. 

“I didn’t want to see what the company said, or you guys.” You confess, letting out a deep sigh, trying not to burst into tears. 

“The boss wasn’t having it. He threatened to sue anyone who was defaming you, or spreading malicious comments.” Jinyoung explains, looking for something on his phone. “They published a post about you leaving, about how it was the fault of so many hateful comments, and that we would be taking an extended hiatus due to, how did he phrase it?” he pauses, trying to remember the words. 

“Stress and heartbreak from losing a dear friend.” Jackson says, refusing to look at you. “None of us wanted to keep going without you.”

“I told you, we couldn’t just forget about you.” JB pipes in, taking the phone from Jinyoung to show you. 

Comment from: @/wang-gaepark-gae:

What the hell is wrong with people? Jackson and Y/n should be allowed to date without everyone throwing a fit #justicefory/n

Comment from: @/y/n_protection_squad:

Her concepts were so cool! Who cares that they were dating, y’all just took the coolest production designer away from them! This is why we can’t have nice things. #justicefory/n

Comment from: @/wouldletbam_bam:

Does this mean we’re getting the person who did girlsgirlsgirls back? Cause I’ll find Y/n myself if that’s the case.

Comment from: @/notjae6: 

Even if you didn’t like their relationship, you didn’t have to ruin everything for everyone. You probably ruined her life #justicefory/n

Comment from: @/aghasefory/n:

Is this why Youngjae looked so sad in his last Vlive? Wait what about Mark? They were besties right? #justicefory/n

“Are they all-?”

“Most of them. Our fans really like you, and they love your work more.” Jinyoung explains. “They’ve trended the Justice for Y/n hashtag for almost three months, and they’ve been releasing their fav clips of you.”

“Wait, clips of me?” 

“Yup, people saw you a lot more than you think. You are the person we were closest to besides our managers.” Mark chuckles, wiping his eyes. 

“The boss already agreed to let you come back. He says he’ll make sure any malicious comments are met with legal action.” JB interjects, giving Jinyoung his phone back. 

“Why does it matter so much?” You almost huff, refusing to look at the boys, knowing it will make you start crying. 

“Because we could have lost you. Forever, permanently.” Jackson finally spoke up. “Mark told us about high school, and about the bridge.” Your heart rate increases drastically as you think back to that day, the day you almost died. 

“We’ve been so worried this whole time.” Mark begins. “So worried I would never get to see you again.” 

“So why didn’t you call?” 

“You said you wanted to leave, and we did our best to respect that.” JB explains, stepping forward, now not only as your friend, but as Got7’s leader. “So we are here to apologize, and to ask you, beg if we have to, to come home with us.” All seven of them drop into a 90 degree bow, each one apologizing at once. You glance towards the house, where your parents are pressed to the screen of the front window, listening to the whole conversation. Both of them nod vigorously, gesturing towards the boys. A small chuckle bubbles up from your chest as the tears start spilling onto your cheeks. 

“I’m so sorry, you guys.” You squeak out, making them slowly come upright, “I thought I was going to be okay, I thought you would just forget about me, and I’m so sorry. I shouldn’t have left.” Their faces erupt into grins, with Mark dashing forward to scoop you into a tight hug. The other boys join in a second later, squishing you at the center of the circle. “I really missed you guys.” You croak from where your face is squished into Jackson’s shoulder.

“We know.” Bambam grins, patting your head. 

“And now you're not allowed to leave.” You bring your head up, finally looking into Jackson’s eyes. 

“Deal.”

~~Tag List: 

@dreaming-hope25

@equesasprokishi

@rxbelprxyer

@destroyed-and-damned

[lillsxd]

stupid project

peter parker x reader 

requested: no

word count: 1999

hey guys give me notes on what i should fix so i can get better thanks 

_________________________________________________

what does life mean? what is living? i ask myself that everyday. why am i stuck in this crazy world? “y/n, y/n hello. earth to y/n” i hear snapping out of my thoughts “yes peter” i look over to him sitting in his desk tapping his pen to his mouth. “we have to get started on this paper” the nerdy friend of mine rolls his eyes and sitting back in his seat. i let out a sigh.”Pete i know but i dont wanna its stupid and annoying and” i stop and look at peter confused. He is looking behind me and back at me like there was a bug in my hair. i was about to say something as the blonde teacher slaps two detention notes on my and peters desk. as she walks away.

he whispers “really y/n again” this was the second time this week. “sorry lets get started” i reached for the instructions on peters desk and he stops me. “you know i could just do it later” he scratched the back of his neck. why would he say that. does he not think i can do this.  know this is our last grade of the year and peter dont believe in me  “no” i say with no emotion in my voice. “but y/n-” “no” i cut him off and snatch the paper from his hand and write down what i need to until i get cut off by the bell. i grab all my stuff together and leave as quick as i can before peter can say something to me.

why would he? as i walk down to the hallway to the bathroom to skip my last class i bump into his friends. “oh hey y/n” Ned says waving. i ignore him completely, trying to hold back my tears running to the bathroom locking the stall. he dont trust me. why am i reacting like this i should be mad i should just brush it off. the bathroom door opened and i lifted my feet up so no one sees me in here. “y/n are you in here” mj says. the footsteps get quiet as i dont respond, looking under the door i see her shoes. they are boots with little chains on them her shoelaces are mismatched and she knocks on my stall door. i dont answer looking around the stall. ‘school sucks’, ‘BLM’, ‘spider man is soooo hot’, were written on the stall wall with different handwriting and colors. “y/n are you okay” she knocked again. “im fine mj just ate something that messed up my stomach” i wiped my tears and pulled down my hair to fix it so my puffy eyes arnt noticeable.                                                                                                                                                                                                      As i put my feet down from the toilet about to unlock the door she slides a drawing under my stall. “i know thats not the reason that your in here maybe this will cheer you up, and y/n if you need anyone to talk to girl to girl call me my number is on the back. and if its peter i will kill him. i will let you be but for real text me i am here.” she says walking out of the gross bathroom. the door shuts and i grab the paper. It is a dawing of me and peter. it looks like it took months to finish and i flipped the paper over and it reveled her number. I've known peter for years we have always been the bestest of friends until he met mj and started to hang out more with them. ive been alone most of this school year. in the begging of the class he wouldn't talk to me or look at me or anything. it was like he forgot i existed. i got cut off from my thoughts as my phone lit up buzzing. i opened it to see peter texted me.

Pete: y/n are you okay?

Pete: please answer me

Pete: do you wanna come over and do this project after detention? we can listen to your fav music and watch movies afterwards?

my fingers tap out a message ‘no i dont want to i just wanna go home you dont even tr-’ no i shouldn't say that. i tap on the screen erasing the message i try again ‘sure Pete meet you by the buses’ i type out.looking at my screen for a minute. he will probably just bale on me like last time. so dont get my hopes up. my thumbs tap on the send button.

Pete: okay meet ya, are you coming in the next class?

my face gets all red. i forgot i had two classes with him how stupid ill just tell him im busy or something. ‘no i got called to the office for something dont tell teacher’ i type thinking it was a great excuse. i reach for my bag and grab out my sketch book and flip to an empty page. as my pencil sketched away the rest of the school day peter wad in class writing my notes for me until the bell rang.

After the bell rang i got out of the stall reaching for my bag of makeup going towards the mirror. I see black running down my face and fix it. i get out of the bathroom and start walking to the detention room. Maybe it wont be as bad i thought it would. “y/n over here” peter calls sitting in a empty desk patting a spot next to him i roll my eyes and walk twords him. “hey y/n” peter waves and i just nod and sit down. as the hour of detention goes by peter looks at me time to time seeing me draw something in my sketch book. “hey y/n” he whispers and pokes my arm. i look at him. “i have to do a quick thing before we head to my house okay so just wait for me” he says nervously. “ok” is all i say before the teacher looks at us. The rest of the time passes i get up to leave shoving my book into my bag and walking out to where the buses would usually be. i wait. putting headphones in i play Shawn mendes. listening to music waiting for peter.

As time goes by to 30 minutes to an hour to two hours to three. i get up from my sitting position. he ditched me again. i feel tears hit my cheeks as i start to walk home. walking turned into running hearing leaves crunching under my feet. music blasting in my ears. why. he is probably with mj or Ned. why do i trust him. why did he pick me for the project. why would he. tears getting stronger. running not home just anywhere. my feet taking me wherever they want until i reach the woods. there was smoke and pieces of metal everywhere. i wipe my face looking to see if anyone needs help. moving pieces of metal and wood and i see a blue and red piece of fabric from far away. i run to it..the person is  trapped under a big chunk of metal. “s-spider man?” i question. realizing its him the hero himself. he looks over and sees my puffy red face and coughs a little not being able to talk. i look at him more closely he is all beaten up and dirty. he has holes in his suit and some hair poking out of a rip on his head only revealing the color of his hair. “can you grab a pipe and lift up the metal please” he says trying to deepen his voice. “o-oh yes of course” i say grabbing a big pipe almost to heavy to pick up and shove it under the metal. i try to push it down but it wouldn't budge. so i stood on it and jump and as soon as it lifted a little he managed to push him self out.

“thank you ma’am that i have no clue who is at all” he says in his deep weird voice as he nervous laughs. i furrow my eyebrows and nod “sure Mr spider man who saves the world” i laugh copying his obviously fave voice. he just sits there in silence and i turn on my heals to walk away “wait” he says in a familiar voice “i mean wait” he cuts himself off in a deep voice. i stop and turn around waiting for him to continue. “who ever you are running from he will come back just give him time” he says in his deep voice and starts to limp away and lift his arm up and start swinging away. what was that about and what was that terrible voice. and why did he seem so familiar?

I start to walk home forgetting about peter. after hours i get home seeing no car in the drive way. “looks like its a late night for me” i say under my breathe unlocking the front door and stepping inside. i throw my backpack on the ground and take my shoes off. my body hurts but i still manage to get up the stairs and going to my room. as i lay down on my bed my phone rings. i look at it. ‘Pete’ it says buzzing in my hand i answer it

“what peter” i frown into the phone disappointed and sad.

“y/n i am so sorry i ditched you i was leaving and i got a call from my boss and i had to come in im-” i cut him off  “peter its okay down worry about it goodnight” i say about to hang up

“wait can i come over i can explain everything so much better” he says nervously “ i guess peter” i say hanging up. ten minutes has passed and i hear a knock at my door. i run down stairs and open it to see peter. he has a big coat on with black sweat pants. he has bruises all over his fave and cuts. i gasp and grab his face “ OH my god peter what happened are you ok let me clean you up” i say grabbing his hand bringing him towards the bathroom “y/n im ok its just a scratch” he said squeezing my hand softly. i stop “i swear if flash did this i will kill him.” clenched my jaw, opening the bathroom door and making him go in and i close the door behind me. “no y/n it wasn't him i promise but i do have to talk to you” he says grabbing the rubbing alcohol from my hands. “well what is it peter? if it was about ditching me we can talk about it later let me-” he cut me off by unzipping his jacket showing me his suit “y/n im spider man thats why ive been ditching you someone very dangerous was out there today you helped me get out from under scrap metal today y/n” he says pulling out his beated up mask from his jacket pocket and looked at me.

i was just standing there looking at him in shock. “y/n?” he says “you are spider man?” i say in shock “yeah im sorry i didn't show up after school and been treating you differently” he said holding my cheek “parker is spider man” i smile “ i knew it” i giggle “your man voice is funny” i say looking into his eyes. he leans in “y/n” he licks his lips and looking at your lips and back to your eyes. “hm” i say leaning in to where our lips are almost touching. He kisses me passionately as i kiss back holding onto him. i pull away for air and i say looking in his eyes smiling...

“ive always loved you parker”

[inspector-montoya-fox]

#5 - The Cold Heart of Hate

Setting: well that was fast... we make it to Russia, where we’re greeted to the evilest of evil lairs. when not dodging robo-falcons and burning boulders, the first mission acts as a tour and establishes the fact that we’re legit in a volcano. i don’t want to say that this is anticlimactic because the missions in this episode are truly hard, but there’s no hub to explore. instead, it’s a chain of missions that lead to the Clockwerk battle, and i guess that makes sense since there’s no time to waste, the stakes are high, etc. if you weren’t able to piece the clues together about Clockwerk’s identity up to this point, the missions do not help. unlike some of the game’s other episodes where the baddies’ personalities are reflected by the settings, Clockwerk remains a shadow up until the very end (and that’s kinda ironic when you think about how he has a huge fucking tower with his face on it). considering the absence of a main hub, the missions do a pretty good job in establishing the mood. we see the outside and inside of the volcano while controlling the van, and then Bentley’s hacking and Sly’s journey into the lab exhibit the level’s technological/ science-y aesthetic. on that note, let’s talk a bit about that lab. i’ve mentioned this before on my account but Cold Heart of Hate is a slave to the early platformer tradition of having an evil lab as the final stage. i don’t blame the game for that - here’s what’s weird though: if Clockwerk is so much larger than Sly, he couldn’t possibly fit into that lab. so... who works there? the robo-falcons? or is Clockwerk actually a ship for someone else? i uh *removes tin foil hat* ...... the huge Clockwerk tower is great for exposition, given that Clockwerk, although a rotting owl corpse stuffed inside a machine, has a huge ego. Sinking Peril is my favorite mission in the episode because it sets up the perfect atmosphere for the final bossfight. fighting the bird over its sinking tower of a replica not only ups the ante but also makes it feel even more satisfying when we finally get to drop it into the lava. lastly, i said Sunset Snake Eyes represented red and i kinda regret it now because that should have been orange and Cold Heart of Hate should have been red. welp! Cold Heart of Hate can be black. seems fitting.

Characters: i lied - the setting does reflect Clockwerk’s character in a very specific way: we’re literally inside a cottdamn volcano. tensions are brewing, the veil is about to be removed. Clockwerk is great. no, he’s more than great. he’s a satisfying and deserving final boss. he’s a maniacal, narcissistic, eGoMaNiAc that really gets under your skin when he keeps on pulling off the reveals. not ONLY has he killed Sly’s entire lineage, the QUEEN had the AUDACITY to stay alive for centuries! Clock-werk it baby! we have no choice but to STAN. the bitch is evil and that’s made crystal clear. his source of youth? hatred. the bird literally killed to remain healthy. and i’m glad he knows no shame because the monologue at the beginning of the bossfight is everything i ever wanted. i guess, Clockwerk has the shortest appearance in the game but still manages to make it impactful. whoever played the game during their childhood knows what i’m talking about - the music, the dialogue, the purple shooting cues: they all remain fresh in the head. the bossfight is the stuff of nightmares. Carmelita makes her final comeback in the perfect recipe for a climactic clash. she starts off as the damsel in distress that can’t be trusted because of her profession, but ultimately helps Sly take down Clockwerk. and i love that this is the beginning of Carmelita putting an end to Sly’s nemeses. her role is great here. yes, she’s the love interest that gets shamelessly left behind at the very end, but she’s the one that helps Sly get back his cain. actually, here’s something i’ve never thought of before: we make such a huge deal out of Carmelita being a playable character in Sly 3, that we all forgot she was playable in Sly 1 as well. i’m lowkey shocked. i don’t know how i overlooked this BUT ALSO shocked to just realise that in both Sly 1 and 3, Sly loses his cain (SP stuck to the original formula for final level suspense, i guess). and let me use that revelation to segue to Sly. he’s made it y’all!!! he’s finally here, ready to extract vengeance. and it shows. we might take his valour and chivalry for granted because this is the Sly we all know and love, but if this was your first time playing the game and somehow escaped all possible clichés by living under a rock your entire life, you’ll appreciate the raccoon’s persistence to save Carmelita. he didn’t have to do it, but he did it. let me praise Kevin Miller here for a sec, because without his voice-acting this would mean nothing. but it’s because of him that it means so much. when you finally beat Clockwerk and the cutscene starts playing and Sly says how he’s made it, it really feels like home, y’know? damn. also: Bentley and Murray finally come into the spotlight. i don’t want to go into detail because i’d rather talk about friendship in the cottdamn Themes section, but Cold Heart of Hate is what makes them true characters.

Themes: off the top of my head? legacy, revenge, friendship, love trumps hate, climax, heat, honour, the past, and many more. i’ll go with my favs because this deserves a post on its own. friendship goes hand-to-hand with love trumps hate because it’s represented by everyone that came out to support Sly. Bentley, Murray and Carmelita come through. they put their fears and differences aside and prevail to help Sly get to the top. they all play their roles, their motivation being love for the raccoon, and that comes into stark contrast with Clockwerk’s preachings. the age-old “good vs evil”. Clockwerk stayed alive by feeding on hatred and got his ass kicked by a group of friends and the love interest (not yet a woman on her own). it’s traditional and it works. similarly to Tide of Terror, the theme of heat ensures that the player is kept engaged. there’s no time to roam around, find clue-bottles, etc. the need to finish this as quickly as possible is enhanced by the volcano landscape and the high temperature. this is especially seen in Sinking Peril because of the rising lava. if you waste time you will literally get gobbled up. the lava encapsulates Sly’s progress and his temper as well. he’s burning inside, itching to finally get revenge (you’ll notice that Sly 1 has no operations and that presents the gang’s early days, Sly’s rash attitude and his persistence to just go up to the main baddie and fight). and the heat’s significance is ultimately shown when Clockwerk sinks into the lava. he doesn’t only get blown up - he “dies”, sinking into the volcano, deteriorating in the heat, showing how time is inescapable. there’s some karmic energy going on here, as Clockwerk cheated the Coopers of a normal death and in turn got served, showing that even if you find a way to stay alive it ultimately won’t work. i also want to touch on motifs, and the motif of technology is a nice one. it doesn’t only showcase Clockwerk’s genius, but it also allows for Bentley to go head-to-head with the owl. there’s something truly cyber about Cold Heart of Hate, but not in the traditional sense. like, the collapsing computer screens during Burning Rubber feel absurdly surreal, pushing the cyber-ness to its limits. i don’t even know anymore, i’m tired.

What I Like: hmmm... i like traversing Clockwerk’s lab. i love Sinking Peril. i love that the end cutscene gifted humanity with those Japanese Barbie Girl rainbow videos. there’s no room for likes and dislikes here, but favourite detail would definitely have to be Clockwerk’s health-bar animations during the bossfight, slowly turning from owl to computer brain thing. very reminiscent of a purple yak toy in a Cartoon Network show which i’m dying trying to remember. if anyone knows what i’m going on about lmk please.

What I Don’t Like: the lack of a hub to explore kinda irks me but i won’t say i don’t like it because i understand why they didn’t include one. instead, this spot goes to Murray’s driving and Bentley’s hacking. thematics aside, i literally do not want to replay Cold Heart of Hate because of the Murray section with the slime monsters. the controls continue to be clunky, the slime monsters are annoying and look like they have raisins for eyes. Bentley’s hacking isn’t as annoying, but it’s definitely frustrating. it’s a far cry from Sly 2 and 3′s hacking parts... yea.........

Quote: Perfection has no age...

[svynakee]

castlevania s3 thoughts

Well more like complaints. Although I do find it worth watching; maybe after S4 comes out, though. Because S3 is really just a fancy teaser for S4.

I really don’t like how Castlevania S3 felt like a waste of time (except for 30% which was very good). I mean yeah I watch shows to waste time in general but hear me out.

By the end of S3, it feels like nothing happened. The status quo is kept. There’s a lot of setup with a tenuous promise of S4 payoff. There might be growth, but really, everything feels more like the catalyst for growth to happen later. It’s like following your GPS and it says “You’ve arrived at your destination :)” but you find yourself at some dusty crossroads and there isn’t even a petrol station in sight.

That’s basically all I can say without spoilers. I have a lot more to say with spoilers. So-

If Castlevania S3 was divided into 4 basically unrelated stories (Styria, Lindenfeld, Isaac’s travels, Alucard’s castle), at least half of them ended up saying/contributing nothing to the overarching plot, setting and characterisation. It felt like an extended trailer. Action, twists, your favs making an appearance…then goodbye, screen fades to black, see you next season.

TLDR version: get rid of Isaac’s entire arc, develop Sumi and Taka or get rid of them, Lindenfeld sorely needed more focus, no need to change Styria but more Styria would be nice.

Compare to S1, which was also mostly setup for the plot resolution in S2. It didn’t feel like a waste of time. Why? Because of the threat of Dracula? I don’t think so. It’s because when we first meet Trevor, we’re presented with a very solid image of who he is. He’s alone, he’s purposeless, he doesn’t want to take up his family legacy. 3 episodes later and he’s got two “friends” and a clear goal to pursue. And he’s no longer a nameless drifter – he’s the last living Belmont, vampire hunter, returning to his ancestral home so he may arm himself to face Dracula.

Alucard

Alucard’s story was the worst offender in my opinion. We start with Alucard being alone and sad in his empty castle. We end with Alucard being alone and sad in his empty castle. While this could be an interesting start of darkness for the dhampir, the fact that we don’t really see the results make it an overall unsatisfying season. Suki and Taka contributed nothing. We learned almost nothing about them. Their motivations were frankly generic – they want to fight vampires? Well we already know people who do that. Their obsession with the castle’s engine? Goes nowhere. Their friendship with Alucard? Shallow, not really built on mutual points of interest. Then they die.

The truth is, Sumi and Taka were dealt a bad card to begin with – Alucard, to be exact. Because a ranged and close quarters fighter duo of vampire hunters has direct competition with the previous season’s S&T, Sypha and Trevor. Instead of giving them the time and development needed to grow apart, they seemed more like plot devices to get Alucard to where he needs to be in S4. Or just to prove he’s lonely and gullible. And a bottom.

I feel like there’s a lot of potential in this storyline. Perhaps Taka and Suki’s interest in the castle is more nefarious; maybe they were part of a bigger group. Their betrayal of Alucard could cause him to reconsider his father’s stance on humanity. As a stepping stone, I have no complaints about this storyline. But that’s because there’s nothing to say. Its impact all depends on S4 and S4 isn’t out yet. So, the entire thing just feels frustrating, a pointless distraction from the other storylines.

Isaac

Isaac should not have gotten as much screen time as he did, unless they actually did something useful with him. As much as I love his character (Casually putting Godbrand down? Instant fav.) his presence in S3 feels like pointless pandering. Because he spent all that time doing nothing.

We know who Isaac is, because of S2. We know what his motivations are: return to/avenge Dracula. We know his general worldview, the thing that makes him what he is – he has a low opinion of humanity, is highly disciplined and loyal to Dracula. And the thing is, NONE of these things change in S3. Instead we’re treated to Isaac repeatedly almost thinking humans are okay, then getting proven wrong when he tries to give them a chance, then killing everyone.

This is would serve a purpose if: Isaac was seen as ambivalent towards humanity or conflicted about condemning them in S1 (more like Hector, perhaps). Isaac was more like original Isaac, an unhinged sadist and being saved by Dracula starts him on a path to redemption which is repeatedly denied.

But no. Isaac is always shown to be calm, disciplined and set in his views. Having him go through this completely unchanged makes his character ‘arc’ a waste of time.

The problem is Isaac’s storyline also feels unnecessary plot-wise. Isaac finds humans disgusting and his power is to be a monster spawn point. The fact is, if Isaac shows up one day with a monster army and wants to kill humans, we don’t need an explanation for it. Isaac himself is the explanation. The only thing that needs resolving is ‘how did he get from the desert to bother the heroes’ and that can be solved by “I took a boat” or “I found a transportation mirror” or even “I used a night creature to carry me”. He can just tell us. It can be a shot of him travelling. Or a cheesy montage set to rock music I don’t care.

So the fact that character-wise Isaac is just going through a series of resets is made even more tedious when you realise that plot-wise he’s also been completely useless.

His big fight was fun, but it lacked emotional impact. The wizard wasn’t opposed to Isaac, either in terms of good/evil or ideologically. There was no catharsis to the wizard dying because we never knew those townspeople. Who got turned into night creatures anyway. By Isaac.

Belnades and Belmont (the dancing bear)

The Lindenfeld plot I would say has all the elements of an excellent story but needed more time. More focus. I hated S3’s style of constantly jumping between the four storylines, especially when one of them involved Isaac going through a banal cycle on another continent and the other had the Discount Belmont and Belnades.

In my opinion, Lindenfeld only suffered because there wasn’t enough focus to really build up the almost Lovecraft-esque mystery for Trevor and Sypha to investigate. Germain barely interacted with them, we only got his story via infodumping and a bad dream. Their relationship with the Judge didn’t feel deep enough that his ‘betrayal’ had impact (besides, it was bundled up with Alucard and Hector’s betrayals so there’s a bit of overexposure apathy). And it’s hard to be sympathetic towards townspeople when, for most of the series, townspeople are shit. Townspeople blamed Belmont for Dracula’s horde. Townspeople tattled on Lisa. Townspeople antagonise Isaac. Showing us 1 family eating dinner isn’t going to change that.

There was something of a start to an emotional arc where Trevor questions Sypha’s naiveté, his future with her, etc. which would have been stronger if it wasn’t just the start of an arc. Leaving them horrified at the truth of the Judge, the destruction of the town and their inability to prevent disaster is absolutely fine. But when it’s also paired with Isaac’s Are Humans Bad Merry-go-Round and Forever Alone Alucard, yet another “to be continued” ending instead of closure was frustrating.

Hector but not really

Hector, similar to Isaac and Alucard, starts and ends in the same place. I have no complaints about the Styria storyline though because Hector isn’t the character carrying this subplot. Lenore is.

Lenore starts out with a clear goal and obstacle to that goal. The other vampire sisters seem unconvinced that she can solve it, or that any of them can. Lenore succeeds despite these odds, proving her own strength, cunning and patience. She also shows how her way, the diplomat’s way, has the same value as Carmilla’s schemes, Striga’s military knowledge and Morana’s talent for governance. She has an arc. Sure, it’s a villain arc, but villains need them. S2 had Carmilla working against Dracula, putting her forces into place, manipulating the war council, stealing Hector to her side. S3 has Lenore.

Meanwhile, the Styria subplot also sets up the new villains for the heroes to face – cunning Carmilla, strong Striga, strategic Morana and manipulative Lenore. Along with Hector the army spawn point. We have the new location, Styria. We see the dynamic and power hierarchies of the new villains. We learn about their overarching goal and how they mean to achieve it. Lots of setup, even more than the other storylines, but it has a satisfying arc within it that means it gives closure.

If S3 was freed from Static Isaac and Sumi/Taka (who have expiry dates and arrived half stale), the Styria storyline could benefit from the extra time. Better establish the dynamic between the four sisters (as opposed to Striga-Morana, Lenore-Hector and then a little bit of Carmilla). Give Hector more time to show his emotions; his despair, his loneliness, his genuine desire to have a friend despite his better judgement.

Final thoughts and Season Finales

Overall, the strongest parts of S3 are bogged down by subplots that really didn’t deserve so much screen time. I question the editing style of constantly jumping between the storylines; it comes at the cost of emotional investment into each one. The finale is especially strange to me. Two fights and two sex scenes that clashed, broke tension and made it tough to respond emotionally. Isaac’s fight should’ve happened earlier, a mid-season spectacle that really doesn’t have emotional impact. Lenore’s manipulation and betrayal could have been a second-to-last episode thing. The heroes naturally deserve the prime spot of season finale; the disastrous end of that fight also sets up the gloomy tone of the ending.

Sumi and Taka can die whenever, however. I literally could not care less whether they tried to kill Alucard after sex or over dinner. I barely care about their reason for attempted murder. I don’t know what part they play in the grand scheme of things and I am not invested in them as individuals.

If the entire point of the arc was to prove that Alucard was a bottom, just have him absent the entire season and add a post-credits scene of him using a dildo. Then he accidentally smashes it with his vampire strength and cries on the floor.

[captain-aralias]

Fanfic year in review - 2019

yeah - i’m going to answer all these questions too. just watch me. 

List of Completed Fics this year:

Keep Calm (Carry On, S/B and ensemble, Teen, 69k)

Sex and Blood (Carry On, S/B, Explicit, 16k)

The Sound of Silence (Carry On, S/B, Teen, 10k)

Coming Up For Air (Carry On, S/B, Explicit, 4k)

Hang the Moon (Carry On, S/B and ensemble, Teen, 30k)

The sky isn’t black anymore (Carry On, S/B, Explicit, 9k)

This is fine (B7, B/A and ensemble, Teen, 4k)

Total: 7 fics, 142k words - making it one of my most prolific years ever in terms of word count! (even though i wrote about 30k of ‘keep calm’ last year, which would take the total down to a more reasonable level). 

i answer some questions about them below the cut... 

Best/worst title?

Keep Calm is the best title, for sure, as it’s a role reversal of ‘Carry On’. The only bad thing about this title is that i love role reversal fics and i can never use it again. also... i guess as i got to the end i started to think... ‘Should i bring out this theme of calmness...? is this even a theme????’ It was a bit distracting, essentially. 

worst title is ‘Sex and Blood’, which does what it says on the tin - can’t deny it. it’s supposed to be about how vampirism links the two things for baz, right? .... but i don’t like it. also - when people comment on it (thank you! please do comment on it! please keep reading it!) this stupid title that i wrote appears on my lock screen of my phone, which i just leave lying around at work. 

but i know - i did it to myself. i should have thought of a better title. 

Best/worst summary?

i don’t know if i already pointed this out on tumblr, but i noticed recently that all my ‘carry on’ fic summaries have a [Clause A - bad or good situation] but/or some other conjunction [Clause B - something happens that causes a fic to exist!] structure, except for ‘The Sound of Silence’. 

Even having realised that, I’ve still written a summary with the same turn for my as yet unnamed bodyswap fic... 

I think the best summary is probably ‘Keep Calm’. 

Worst summary - Coming Up for Air, but I was trying not to give spoilers for Wayward Son. and it’s a PWP.

Best/worst first line?

generally i love my first lines, and hate my last lines. 

i would say all of my 2019 first lines are indeed pretty good. ‘The sky isn’t black anymore’ is straight into being X-rated so i’m not going to quote it here in case that’s not your jam, but i like it a lot. 

i also like: There’s something wrong with Baz. (Sex and Blood). Obvious - but, it works.

i don’t not like any of them, even the really long rambling first line of ‘This is FIne’.

i will call out the first line of ‘Keep Calm’ though, because i spent ages trying to work out how to punctuate it, and i still don’t know what i should have done. it currently reads: The Mage is waiting for me, outside the door to Mummer’s House.

depending on when you read it, though (and i’m sure you didn’t notice) it may have had no comma (The Mage is waiting for me outside the door to Mummer’s House.) or it might have been a dash where the comma was, or even - gasp - a full stop (because rainbow likes to break sentences into fragments so that’s ok).

 i kept changing it. this may seem like a complete waste of time (and i think the right-right answer is that there shouldn’t be a break at all - no comma is correct), but i wanted the first sentence to FEEL like ‘the mage is waiting for me’ - the place is merely corroborative detail. the point is the mage is there, about to take simon away and change the plot. hence ... the punctuation.

Best/worst last line?

as i said - very few of my last lines are what i wanted. i have not mastered them at all. too often it’s just ‘this is where i ran out of story’. the worst is the ending to the ‘Sound of Silence’ where i literally resorted to ‘Carry On’ cliche to get out of it: And he kisses me.

it’s fine, it works - but i could have done better.

the actual ending line of ‘Hang the Moon’ is pretty good i think, but the pacing of that ending is all wrong. i’m much happier now i wrote a whole extra fic so the weight of everything ending isn’t on those final hundred words. 

the BEST last line i wrote... the one that actually really works (for me) is ‘Coming Up For Air’. And I feel like I can breathe again. 

Looking back, did you write more fics than you thought you would this year, less than you thought, or about what you predicted?

apparently i wrote a lot - which i probably wouldn’t have predicted last year, although by this time last year i’d written ‘the mage’s heir’ and the first half of ‘keep calm’, which did provide much of the wordcount for this year. so - i guess if i’d thought about it, it would have seemed plausible. 

first person helps me write long. and in b7 i learned to write long. 

i guess i’m surprised because it felt like i wasn’t writing that much in comparison to some people in the fandom (and i probably still didn’t in comparison!) and i wrote several long things rather than many short things, so the list is still pretty short despite being MANY words.... 

What pairing/genre/fandom did you write that you would never have predicted last year?

strange though it may be to say - i probably wouldn’t have predicted i’d write blake’s 7 this year. ‘never go back’ - that’s my motto. or rather ‘i can’t go back, my brain doesn’t work that way’. but good to have done it. 

What's your favourite story this year? Not the most popular, but the one that makes you the happiest.

hard to say. it’s a draw between ‘keep calm’, which i love because it did everything i wanted it to. and ‘hang the moon’, which is a collection of all my favourite tropes loosely disguised as a fic. 

they’re also the two longest - and i tend to like the long ones better for reasons i have gone into before.

Okay, NOW your most popular story.

it’s pretty much a tie between ‘keep calm’ and ‘sex and blood’ - and since ‘keep calm’ was many chapters long, is earlier, and much more heavily promoted by self and the big bang, i’m pretty sure that means ‘sex and blood’ is more popular over all. 

thank you fandom, for loving vampire porn as much as i do.

Story most underappreciated by the universe?

we all know (well, those of us who know what it is) that b7 is a tiny fandom, so with that in mind, i think ‘This is Fine’ is well appreciated! <3

the story that is (to me) surprisingly about half as popular as most things that i’ve written for ‘carry on’ is ‘Coming up for air’, which i have now re-linked for you in case you never read it.

it disproves the rule that shorter porny things will be more read (although obviously the vampire porn suggests the opposite). idk, i thought it would catch those who were in the post-wayward son crash, like i was. 

the other thing to say here is that it was still extremely appreciated - i mean, it’s got about 50 times as many kudos as any of my b7 things, and overall i would say it is a thing that is well received. i know i’m fortunate to be friends with people who re-blog my stuff and people who comment, and i (in turn) really appreciate THAT. 

so - it’s not a whine. just an observation

Story that could have been better?

i think i would have written ‘This is fine’ better if i’d written it five years ago. i definitely could have written a blake-travis mindlink to make the gods weep with its perfection ;) what a prompt.

i’ve talked about how i don’t rate the endings of ‘Sound of Silence’ or ‘Hang the Moon’ as well, so i think these could have been better. if only i was better at waiting.., and thinking of an ending. or just - if only i was better at endings. 

Sexiest story?

i think that’s the one that has the word ‘sex’ in the title. because vampires are sexy. and so is informed consent.

Saddest story?

sad?? what is this SAD? 

‘This is fine’ is quite sad given that it’s also about telepathic pornography. because we know everyone’s going to die soon. 

and ‘Sound of Silence’ isn’t sad, at least i don’t think it is - but Baz certainly is sad while it’s happening. 

Most fun?

i think ‘hang the moon’ is the most fun - because it has all the things that i like best happening in it. they fight some merwolves together, they go plate shopping, simon fights lots of people, fiona is there - it’s very fun.

Story with single sweetest moment?

hang the moon, probably. the bit with the moon. 

although i was thinking... surely i should talk about ‘keep calm’ a bit - isn’t it my equal fav? and i was thinking - what is the sweetest moment there... and the answer honestly is that i think the sweetest moment is the bit where the mage and simon are gardening together and simon doesn’t know if their relationship is doomed forever ... AND THEN the mage tells simon they can watch some VHSes of lucy next time simon comes back and they dont hug, but it is ... enough <3

I’M SORRY - I LOVE AWKWARD FATHER-SON RELATIONSHIPS BEING REDEEMED. 

Hardest story to write?

‘keep calm’ took me months and there were moments when i thought - fuck, this is not ending, and i hate not being able to talk to anyone about this because this fest is going on for months. and i was fortunate that i had the idea of emailing sharkmartini who i then did not know at all, and she was enthusiastic and getting that feedback made me think - ok, this is worth doing. i can finish this. 

but also - i started writing ‘sound of silence’ immediately after the ‘mage’s heir’ finished and i eventually published it over a year later. because the device i’d chosen meant that simon couldn’t say or do anything for most of the bloody story. and that meant that nothing happened, baz, thanks for nothing, and it was very hard to write.

and ‘This is fine’ - i must have written it in a few weeks. so it clearly wasn’t that hard. but in comparison to back when i (though i) knew everything that Avon would ever think or say... it was hard.

Easiest/most fun story to write?

Coming up for air was the easiest story. i haven’t written anything else in a day for this fandom, although it is something i’ve done before, back in the day. 

most of the others were also really fun to write, unless i put them in the ‘hardest story to write’ box. so, you know - about half. 

Did any stories shift your perceptions of the characters?

i started to write ‘no’, but that isn’t true. writing ‘The sky isn’t black anymore’ shifted my perception of the way that i’d written Baz in ‘Hang the Moon’ i.e. my own fic (how wanky is that?) 

most of the others are me putting things that i think about characters into words. so i did the thinking before, rather than during. 

Most overdue story?

i wanted to post ‘This is fine’ on Gauda Prime Day and didn’t :( but i know bunnacula said that was ok ;) so i think the most overdue was the one that took me over a year to finally bother finishing. 

Did you take any writing risks this year? What did you learn from them?

eeeeeer... 

yes, maybe. i would say writing a happy ending for simon in ‘keep calm’ where the happy ending is that he gets a better relationship with his father (see above) as well as getting to go out with baz (whose happy ending is also not just about simon, but mostly is) is a risk in a fandom where everyone hates the mage so much. 

and then i finally wrote my thing about how i think the mage is actually right about many things, and fiona is classist. what i haven’t ever said explicitly on tumblr, i don’t think (though i said it on LJ) is that another reason it is so much easier for me to be sympathetic towards the mage is that he literally is a version of roj blake (the main character of my old fandom and my personal fav). obviously the mage is a blake who is a bit more autistic and significantly further off the deep end on the ‘greater good’ scale than blake ever was. but blake even also dresses like robin hood and is from wales. i haven’t said this before because i feel like it cheapens my semi-championing off him/might make people who really can’t tolerate the mage think ‘wtf? is aralias mental? why does she like roj blake so much?’ to be fair - lots of people in b7 hated him too. 

ANYWAY. what i learned from that is - these are the stories i want to tell and no one got upset, so that is awesome and i shouldn’t be so worried about what people think before i know what people think. 

i also wrote vampire porn, but i didn’t consider that a risk. because i knew that sharkmartini would love it - and that was one person and that was enough. are we all going to write more vampire porn in 2020? i hope so.

This year's theme and the story that demonstrates it most:

good question but hard to answer. 

i think the theme is ...... possibly influenced by ‘wayward son’..... poor communication is bad; good communication is good. maybe? 

and the fic that most demonstrates this is one that i have the most problems with, and that’s ‘The Sound of Silence’ where simon literally can’t communicate for the first half of the fic. and then baz solves his own problem by saying ‘sorry’ and giving back simon’s voice. 

‘The sky isn’t black anymore’, which i really like but feel i haven’t talked about much (it’s an unproblematic fav!) feels very similar and in fact i struggled to make it less about communication/saying what you want than it kept wanting to be. because i was thinking - this isn’t the problem of the fic! the problem is that it’s all too fast, right? but actually - and here we come back to the learning about the characters - it was both. 

because baz is a character who doesn’t communicate. and, like simon in ‘sound of silence’, he was also shut out from the POV in ‘hang the moon’.

What are your fic writing goals for next year?

write more! i want to get my ‘wayward son’ bodyswap out the door before the end of february..... maybe even january, but february sounds very achievable.

i have to finish my zine fic and then lop about 2000 words out of it, probably. 

i want to write another epic thing that is also about politics and vampires. it’s the one where natasha is alive, as well as other things. the problem with this one is that while i know a lot about it, i dont know exactly what the arc is - and i’m bored of re-writing simon giving up his magic to fix the humdrum (which i did... once... but i guess that was too often). so i have to try and work out what the climax is if it isn’t that - and i like to know the ending before i start...... but. my goal is to figure these things out and then write it. 

vampire porn - obvs. 

aaaand - for all of us: i will run a remix! oh yes, i will run a remix. ‘carry on big bang’ (which i definitely won’t do, it’s too solitary for me and too slow, alas - even though i keep thinking ‘i could do my vampire thing! it’s long’. it’s got to be a no) and the zine are in the first half of the year....... and i’m busy and stuff. so i thought it was going to be in december - but now i’m probably going for sign ups in march, post in may. I LOVE REMIX. i’m excited already.

[macaroni-rascal]

Transcrip: Tessa and Scott PJ Kwong Interview

Transcript made from 2016 worlds interview with PJ Kwong, the full video is at the end of the transcript. I didn’t transcribe any of the names of the people who were asking questions and often just summarized what PJ was saying but stayed accurate with all the answers, except the ones we’ve heard before. 

For the every lovely Marcia ( @bivirtuealone ) and anyone else who is interested!

PJ: We are live with Tessa Virtue and Scott Moir

Scott: Hi! I never know when it’s flipped.

Tessa: Yeah! (laugh) It’s exciting, thanks for having us!

PJ: Thank you for doing it! Couple questions via Facebook, what are you guys most excited about for next year? Love you guys!

S: Oh! Well, love you too, first of all. (laugh) What are we most excited about for next year? There is so much! There is a lot we are looking forward to. It’s funny, little time away has really renewed our passion for figure skating. I think, to be honest, this is cliché, I’m really excited to get back and to train and to be an athlete again. We’ve spent a couple weeks with Marie France and Patrice already and their coaching is so fantastic and it just feels great to learn more about our sport. So that’s what I’m most excited about.

PJ: What would you guys say has been for favourite costume over the years?

Scott: Oh, that’s a good question.

T: Thanks for writing that in! I think my original Carmen dress with the long sleeves, the deep V, and the ruffles. My mom designed that and I’m not sure I appreciated it at the time but looking back at the detail I think it was perfect for the program.

S: My favourite costume was that Carmen was as well. I’m pretty lucky in my career, I liked a lot of my costumes but that black long sleeve Carmen one was just simple and everyone knows I like skating black so I was very happy with that.

T: It had a bit of mesh, I liked that.

S: Bit of mesh! Yeah.

PJ: Who doesn’t like a bit of illusion.

S: (He says “oh helloooo there” in a funny little accent)

PJ: What got you guys into skating.

T: (Tells story of grade 1 field trip, and wanting to be competitive)

S: (Tells story of getting tricked into it, couldn’t skate, mom was a skating coach, etc.)

PJ: What is the most challenging stunt you’ve ever performed and why?

S: We had a couple that never made it to competition.

T: Yeah! We spent months and months and months where I stood on Scott shoulders. I wasn’t a pair girl I wasn’t used to the height it was quite scary, trained only to realize it would have been illegal anyway.

S: Not even that cool.

T: Not that cool.

S: It was scary, you were just so much higher than usual.

T: Especially when I went to do the backflip off of you. (Just casually back flipping off of his shoulders on to the ice, fuck Tessa)

S: Yeah, I did the front flip while you did the back flip. (Tessa laugh)

PJ: Commenter says “Love your skating and good luck!”

T: That’s so nice!

S: That is so nice. We have such amazing support from Canadian fans and fans around the world, we’ve always felt pretty blessed but –

T: It’s nice to connect with people this way.

S: I didn’t think people would remember who we are to be honest, so. (Tessa laugh)

T: (they are drinking coffee) We are so casual with are coffees, is this okay?

PJ: Yes, are you kidding? Question for Tessa, but I want Scott to answer too. What is your favourite animal?

Both: OH!

T: I love elephants, I always have I love that they are very matriarchical and I’m very close to my mom and my sister, and my grandma, and if I ever got a tattoo I would get three elephants, three or four in a row, I’m just not bold enough.  

PJ: To signify you are your family?

T: Yeah, I love elephants.

PJ: They hurt, not elephants, tattoos.

T: Yeah, I’ll stay away.

S: I don’t even think I have a favourite animal.

Tessa says something about elephants, but we only hear PJ go “If you met my dog you’d love him! Then Scott replies to whatever Tessa said:

S: You really like elephants, that’s not something you just came up with, we’ve talked about this, probably too often.

T: HA! This is my favourite game to play with Scott, especially when we are in the car.

S: Oh my god, yeah (Tessa laughs) whatisit—inside the actors studio?

T: And I like fire away –

S: What’s your favourite sound?

T: I’ll sleep better at night knowing the answers to all those questions.

PJ: You are different kids, I want you to talk about being in the car on your way to training.

T: Oh gosh.

S: Yeah.

T: Our poor parents, I cannot believe they did that at 4am three or four times a week.

S: Our biggest concern was whether we’d stop at the Tim Hortons or the MacDonalds on the way home.

T: To get our hot chocolate. Well mostly on the way, on the drive – well Scott got me a Marvin the Martian body pillow which was ginormous—

S: Pretty cute for a little guy, gotta say.

T: And he’d have a pillow and we both put our pillows up and kinda go 1,2,3, and lean in towards each other and just sleep the entire car ride.

S: We were cute back then. We’ve changed. (Tessa laugh) I was thoughtful too, like a big body pillow? Tessa was like as big as the body pillow, literally.

PJ: Oh no! Someone is about to pass out from excitement, I’m assuming about you guys.

T: Oh wow! Don’t pass out. Stay with us, stay with us.

S:  Stay with us.

PJ: Scott, do you have any tattoos, if not what would you get?

S: I don’t have any tattoos. I always wanted (to Tessa) do you know what I’m gonna say?

T: I do (laughs)

S: I always wanted a picture of myself on my back like “smiling and giving finger guns – tessa is laughing) you know? So if I’m walking down the beach people are just like “heyyyyy’ I can do that from all angles. (mumbles) From Steve-O though, so can’t do it.

PJ: What do you think about Romeo and Juliet music?

S: We’ve worked on that for years!

T: Yeah.

S: We wanted to do that for years.

T: Yeah.

S: We were actually told at one point we were too old to be Romeo and Juliet. (Tessa’s face is hilarious here, a screen shot for you)

T: I think its just gorgeous music. And I think, we also talked about the idea of using that music but maybe portraying a different story line, why not? Because that music is gorgeous.

S: Mhm, so many great pieces there.

T: We’ll still – we’re working on that maybe, one time.

PJ: Kris Young wants to know do you have a favourite moment that doesn’t involve climbing?

S: Kris Young the singer?

T: (laughs) Kris Young the hockey coach. (Tessa sips coffee)

S: OH! (laughs) Did he say he has a favourite moment from Sochi?

PJ: That’s doesn’t involve climbing?

S: He was there! Very sneaky.

T: Nice try Kris, we’re not dishin’.

S: In the vault, buddy.

PJ: What your favourite ISU set pattern dance to do?

S: That is a good question.

PJ: Wanna know mine? Argentine tango?

S: Ohhhh, that’s one of my favourites.

T: Yeah, that one is fun.

S: I liked the arge (calls it “The Arge) – it was a good dance for us. Tessa’s favourite of all time is the Fiesta (tango fiesta) (T laughs)

PJ: Oh, did you do the arm cross in front, cross behind?

T: Yeah! (laughs) It’s good I’m a tango person cause I was gonna say the Romantica.

S: Yeah, there’s a lot of good ones. I do like the set pattern dances, especially for development but, I like the more complicated ones, waltzes, the newer ones, the golden, the Austrian, just more complicated and more fun to watch and do – so.

PJ: What’s your fav hockey team?

T: I mean we’re leafs fans, right?

S: Right. Babsy is king.

T: Especially with Mike there.

S: Babsy is KING! (Laughs) Oh, I almost spilled my coffee all over you.

PJ: What do you guys do for fun?

T: Oh good question.

S: LOTS!

T: Well, we just had a stint of a lot of fun things. Its been neat taking a step away from competition and trying new activities. Whether it was broadcasting like here with CBC or acting, or fashion. But for fun, in the summer we like to golf.

PJ: Are you good golfers?

S: She’s amazing. I was just going to say because no, I’m not good at all.

T: It’s a hard game that’s for sure.

PJ: We don’t have to worry about you switching sports just yet.

S: No.

PJ: Are you going to be doing more installments of the Scott and Tessa show?

S: (hilarious low incredulous laugh)

T: It’s funny they must be re-airing that because people are coming up to us and I think they think it’s happening right now.

S: Yeah, my grandpa called me really concerned the other day. (T laughs) I was in Toronto and I didn’t tell him cause I was supposed to be taking him to breakfast.

T: Oh that’s funny.

PJ: We love your grandpa by the way.

Both: He’s amazing.

T: None planned right now, no.

PJ: Would you guys ever throw the first pitch at a baseball game?

S: DID IT!

T: We did that, it was terrifying.

S: It was awesome, we’d do it again in a heartbeat.

T: I don’ think I’ve ever been so nervous.

PJ: Who got to throw it?

S: We both got to throw!

T: At the same time, yeah.

S: Tessa said that she didn’t wanna throw and I talked her into it, then she out threw me.

T: No, I didn’t! I had to practice with my brothers in the backyard so many times.

S: We talked and we talked and we were just like, “we are just gonna throw it nice and easy so it—just kind of lob’er in there.

T: We wanted unison.

S: Tessa just pulled back and let one go. It went in the dirt a little.

T: It wasn’t great, it wasn’t great.

PJ: People don’t realize it’s a long way to the pitchers mound.

T: Yes!

S: Its nerves.

T: I practiced on a much shorter distance I think, so it was really daunting to actually get up there.

S: If I could do it again, I’d go up on the hill and I’d kick the leg—do it all.

T: I’d want the catcher to give me the signal, spit a little bit, maybe put some tobacco in my mouth.

PJ: You wouldn’t spit!

S: She’d turn it into a dance move or something! Maybe they’ll have to ask us again.

PJ: Maybe you could throw Tessa?

(laughs)

S: We should have gone into The Goose and have her throw it in. (more laughs)

PJ: That would have been a great idea!

S: We’ll see. We’re creative.

PJ: No doubt about that. If not skating, what sport/activity would you have pursued?

T: Realistically I think I would have pursued dance—

S: For sure.

T: Or ballet. Now? If I were to switch sports, I’d love to be a tennis player. I’m a little short but—loved to play tennis.

S: We should go play.

T: Yeah, that’s next on my list. Let’s do that.

S: Okay, you’re on.

T: We’ll keep you posted on that match. (laughs)

PJ: What people don’t know, is the famous backyard Moir games. I want you to describe –

S: Oh yeah! The backyard games, man!

PJ: With the frisbee –

S: Frippet (sp?),  you know about Frippet. You’re impressive Peej. The Moirs, we are like a bbq backyard family, so we hang out on the back deck a lot. And pretty much anything you can do with one hand is a good game for you and we play this little bag with beanbags. It’s a lot of hours in the backyard. That’s what I would be, I would be a profession leisure sport player.

(I had to stop and laugh, some rural Canadian shit, one handed game so the other is free for your drink)

T: Lawn bowling.

S: Lawn bowling! Oh, that’s a real sport.

T: Oh that’s real, I don’t know why I said that.

S: I dunno, lawn bowlers out there.

Then he like makes a face and points at Tessa.

T: Sorry! I didn’t mean it, I really didn’t mean it.

S: Oopsies…Tessa Virtue’s first miss step ever, take note of that.

(Laughter)

PJ: And we were here to see it, and its live.

S: And it’s live, can’t be taken back. I can see the hate mail from the lawn bowlers now.

(laughter)

PJ: She’s just kidding honestly, send me the mail I’ll take care of it. What has been your funniest memory over your 18 year partnership?

S: Oh wow. You, we keep making funny memories. That’s what’s so great.

T: We had a car ride just last week where we laughed the entire time.

S: Yep. We had a dance party –

T: Dance party, yup.

S: And laughed – what is the funniest thing?

PHONE STARTS RINGING IN BACKGROUND

S: Oh! Who do you think that is?

PJ: That’s embarrassing.

(Tessa laughs)

S: At least its authentic.

PJ: Just pretend it’s a sound effect.

S: Do you want me to get it? I should get it.

T: It’s the lawn bowling association—(laughs)

S: Yeah, exactly! (laughs)

PJ: Scott, could you grab it, if you don’t mind? Cause if wont stop.

S: Yeah!

PJ: So Tessa, what is your funniest memory? Let’s see if Scott says “hello.”

T: Honestly that’s way too…--

S (off camera): Hello?

T: Oh, he’s answering now.

PJ: No one ever calls me!

S (off camera): She is not right now, could she call you back?

PJ: So what do you think of your funniest memory? And someone wants to now what that coffee is that you are holding.

T: Oh, americano.

(Scott mumbles stuff on the phone)

S: PEEJ!

PJ: So Scott, what happened?

S: Oh, they wanted to know if my wife was available. (Tessa dies laughing). “Is your wife Patricia available?” And no actually, she’s busy right now.

PJ: You heard it first here on CBC sports, we weren’t gonna be able to keep it secret forever.

(Then the audio cuts out of a few seconds, not sure what they say but when it comes back:)

PJ: Scott I’m going to make you feel the love too.

S: That’s okay, I love it when they are for her.

PJ: What is your favourite movie?

S: We watched it the other day.

T: The princess bride? I mean yeah, that’s just classic.

PJ: I know your favourite TV show cause we share it! Flight of the Conchords.

T: Flight of the Concords, yes.

S: What’s your favourite TV show now, though?

T: I just finished Broadchurch and that was so good, have you seen that? On BBC – check it out.

S: (mumbles something about Dowton Abbey)

T: Yeah, I can’t bring myself to watch the final episode. I haven’t finished the very end of Harry Potter either because that’s like, it’s never over, so I just don’t want it to end so I don’t know that I’ll watch the last Downton Abbey but I do love that one.

PJ: Makes me feel like I am saying goodbye to friends, make me sad.

S: I cry at the last episode of Friends all the time.

PJ: Who do you relate to, Scott on TV?

S: In television? No not really anybody. I actually thought Jim and Pam from the The Office were my friends for a while though. It’s kinda the same thing, they aren’t real people when it ended I thought they would be on the back deck one day hanging out with me. I get attached, that’s why I don’t watch too much.

PJ: When you retire, Scott please consider comedy. I find your commercial hilarious.

S: You know what?

T: I love that he’s become know from that commercial.

S: I don’t think I’m hilarious, but Tessa still laughs at my jokes and its been 18 years, so.

T: The question is why apparently.

PJ: Is there a new movie you haven’t seen yet that you would like to?

T: Anything that’s come out in the last several years, I can’t remember the last time—

PJ: I really wanna see My Big Fat Greek Wedding 2.

S: It kinda looked fun! Anything with a big family kinda brings ya right back.

(Small chat about Boston movies, and liking Boston, wanting to explore.)

PJ: Anything exciting coming up in the next few months?

S: Well, we have tour which is exciting, in April we do Japan, Switzerland on the way home, we get to visit our friend Lambiel.

(CUT OFF – Shot of PJ’s forehead and her apologizing for technical issues, then switch to vm.

S: What up! Are we on camera?

PJ: You are!

PJ: What is your favourite dance style.

T: Always lead with ballet, but now more contemporary.

PJ: Now you were in the national ballet, I saw pictures of you doing the Nutcracker, was that fun?

T: That was absolutely incredible, that had been a dream of mine, of course, growing up I wanted to take the stage with national ballet. I wasn’t expecting it to be in that capacity I was dressed up as a joker. It’s funny I messages Scott beforehand and I was like “I don’t do goofy – I’m not funny” and he would have been so good with it, but I was paired up with Ethan, a dancer, and we choreographed this whole little thing together it was so much fun and so thrilling.

PJ: Did you ever go up on pointe and can you still?

T: I haven’t tried. I did, yes, but I haven’t tried in many many years.

S: You should, I haven’t been on pointe.  

PJ: Who’s feet are stronger, skaters or ballet dancers?

S: Ballet dancers.

T: Ballet dancers, yeah. I think you lose a lot of the range when your foot is stuck in a boot. Skating trains the opposite muscles.

S: Dancers are tough too, like what is it 18 hours a day? Like obviously skating is crazy training but the dancer’s life, I don’t know how they do it. Just waiting all day, on call, its so demanding. I know that from all my dance experience.

PJ: Favourite dance style?

S: Me? Oh you know, I like switching it up, for me, as long as we keep it fresh I’m cool – like I can’t think of a style I don’t like. We are moving into a style—

Then the video cuts off completely.

[mdwatchestv]

Best Television (Of the Things I Watched) 2018

IndieWire's Liz Miller put together a staggering list of all the television shows that aired this year, excluding most reality and children's programming, to help narrow down top ten lists. If you would like to view it and despair, you may do so by clicking here.

Per her list there were o/a 554 shows on television this annum. Stare into the gaping void of that number, and let it, in turn, stare back into you. Of the television shows on this list, I have seen, at least one episode, of 136 of them. Although I am not a "professional" television "critic" who "gets paid" to give opinions, I am a "television professional" who also writes about it as an "amateur" "hobby". What I'm really trying to say here is that I have never seen an episode of The Americans.

But what I'm REALLY trying to say is that I watch a lot of TV, and work in TV, and love TV and have only seen 25% of the shows currently on television (and yes, I had to Google how to do that math). 25%! That's a quarter! That's an F- -, that is a paltry drip in this vast ocean of content. How is anyone supposed to keep up with that! The only thing I keep up with are the Kardashians, and that show isn't even included on the list of 554 shows!

And so with the disclaimer that any true distillation and subsequent ranking of the current landscape of television is, for all intents and purposes, impossible- I present to  you my picks for the best shows of 2018. Or perhaps more accurately ~*~my~*~ favorite shows, or the shows that brought me the most joy, or who managed to rise above the froth of the seething hoard of content, or shows I’d like you all to watch so we may talk about them. 

Killing Eve - BBC America

Okay so forget everything I just said about the insurmountable tv landscape and the inability to make an accurate judgement of quality, because Killing Eve was the BEST show this year. Watching this show, the latest outing from Phoebe Waller-Bridge, felt like suddenly finding out you've been holding your breath your entire life and finally filling your lungs. Killing Eve is the show I have always wanted to watch, and yet could never have previously imagined being possible. It is a spy thriller that maintains a heady tension, it's a pitch black comedy, it's a love story, it's violent, it's stylish, it's sexy, and it's unapologetically female. I could write an entire blog about this show in regards to women's spaces, sexuality, violence, and the female gaze but there WAS other television this year that I GUESS you want to read about. Real quick: the music was amazing, the clothes were amazing, Jodie Comer has shamed all other psychopath performances, and Sandra Oh held this whole jumble together with a deeply grounded yet intimately vulnerable performance and that shit AIN'T EASY Y'ALL. Also this is on Hulu now....so....

The Terror - AMC

I can say without question that The Terror is the most enjoyable show I've ever seen about men rotting to death on a boat. AMC did a terrible (lol) job of advertising this gem of a series based on an 800 page novel, which itself is based on a real (doomed) expedition to find the Northwest Passage. Yes, the The Terror is about all the ways men can die (many!), but it was also easily the most aesthetically beautiful series I watched this year. Sure, it was scary and there were zombie polar bears, but it also created a subtle unease as delicate as it was unsettling. The natural world is unforgiving and unknowable, but is it more dangerous than what lies in the hearts of men? (Free tagline for you AMC) Everyone slept on this show like they were dying of hypothermia.

Queer Eye - Netflix

Imagine you're you, and you've had a really rough couple of years. I mean, the news is terrible, the planet is dying, and you're never going to be a homeowner. The only thing that brings you joy is lying listlessly on your couch playing cooking games on your phone and trying to pretend that you don't have to haul your corporeal form to work tomorrow. Suddenly, there is a knock on your (over-priced apartment's) door. Who could be visiting you here, at such an hour? Who is there left in the world that cares? You pull on a bathrobe and shuffle over, opening the door and blinking owlishly into outside world. Before you are five beautifully appointed men, they have gifts, salsa, bomber jackets, soft-silken hair,  their energy is non-threatening. They join you on the couch and you cry in their toned arms for hours, for days, for weeks. For the first time in a long time you think maybe humanity is worth saving after all.

Sharp Objects - HBO

I have never fully boarded the Gillian Flynn train, my reaction to watching Gone Girl and reading Dark Places was "Oh...that's it?" So despite the creative heavy hitters (Marti Noxon, Marc-Jean Vallee, Amy Adams) attached, I had reservations about this HBO miniseries. On its surface Sharp Objects is another one of Flynn's lurid mysteries, but its on-screen adaptation created a fully realized world for this particular mystery to inhabit. A world that at turns felt stifling and magical, that oozed resentment, and pain, and fear. A world filled with women who had anger simmering under the skin, caught in their hands, trapped in their mouths. For once this wasn't a story where the twist was the final destination, but rather an inevitability of cruelty wrought on women by their world and by each other.

The Good Place - NBC

Everything on this list so far has been new series. Maybe that's because newness is more interesting, or maybe it's because goodness is hard to sustain. However everyone's favorite philosophy comedy just seems to be getting better and better the longer it goes on, continuing to invent itself from season to season, and even episode to episode.  The Good Place is the only show that can make you a fan of Blake Bortles and also a genuinely better person.

Okay those were my five best shows of the year and now I'm tired. Here are some rapid fire honorable mentions!!!!

Honorable Mentions:

Barry (HBO)- The season finale didn't stick the landing for me, but I can assure you Barry’s actor struggle was documentary-level. Cannot speak for hitman authenticity.....publicly...

GLOW S2 (Netflix) - Improving on the promise of its first season, GLOW can sometimes be a bit messy in delivery but I admire their go big or go home attitude. This season dealt with workplace sexual harassment, parenthood, the AIDs crisis, race, and even had time for a lesbian dream ballet and an anti-kidnapping PSA. Betty Gilpin forever.

Doctor Who (BBC America) - Jodie Whittaker is a sheer delight as the Doctor, and a breath of fresh air for the series. This new season has also taken the back-in-time episodes (always my fav) to a new level- I LEARNED STUFF.

Aggretsuko (Netflix) - Aggretsuko is a Sanrio anime about a red panda named Retsuko. She is 25, she works in an office for a sexist pig boss, she hates her life, and at night she sings death metal karaoke. She is....extremely relatable. Sam please watch this.

The Magicians S3 (SyFy)- I may be biased, but at the same time, I have always loved The Magicians. This is another rare show that gets better the longer it goes on, having carved out a strange little genre space with a tone all of its own. Within the forest of snappy quips and surly fantasy characters, is a beating heart and an ability to achieve real emotional catharsis.

The Haunting of Hill House (Netflix) - I said earlier this year that I had never found a television show truly scary, but this was before I had seen Haunting of Hill House.  I have not yet finished this show because it started giving me nightmares and I can only watch it in the light of day. That being said, the Bent-Neck Lady episode alone is such a tight, terrifying, piece of storytelling it deserves a shout out on this list. Also A+ kid casting, that shit is HARD. 

Brooklyn Nine-Nine (NBC) Probably the time I felt most alive this year were the harrowing  hours between Brooklyn 99's cancellation by Fox and subsequent saving by NBC. During that wretched purgatory it was decided by the internet that B99 was the Last Good and Pure Thing Left and its salvation would mark some sort of victory in the losing battle against the darkness that will  one day overtake us all. Luckily, the day was saved (no thanks to Fox), but the abyss still looms.

That's it! This is everything I thought was good on TV this year! If you thought something else was good, or you would like to shame me for something I did not watch, feel free to do so in the comments or on Twitter.  There are over 550 after all and I ABSOLUTELY DID NOT watch them all.

The television wheel begins inexorably turning again in a few scant weeks, so buckle up buttercups!!! If you read the blog this year, or are reading right now - thank you for your time! If you thought the writing was poor, at least I gave you some entertaining gifs. 

XO MD

[recommendedlisten]

It’s been awhile since Recommended Listen has done one of these, but back by popular (content) demand, the weekly Best of the Rest column has returned to highlight the rest of the week’s great music you should know. Leading into it, Massachusetts DIY scene favs Future Teens and Dump Him both tried to figure out ways to move forward while Big Thief are proving to be unstoppable with their creative genius. The return of Vivian Girls is arguably being enjoyed more so the second time around, Chelsea Wolfe’s natural instincts are giving us even more reasons to appreciate her dark art, and NYC post-punks Bodega continue to live up to the promise of being shiny new models. Meanwhile, Field Mouse succeeded at finding meaning in everything as modern punk scene cult hero Chris Faren searched for his within a screen. There’s a lot more to cover here, so let's get down to the music business.

Here’s the best of the rest from the week of August 11th, 2019…

Antagonize - Slip Death EP [Triple B Records]

The last time I saw Aaron Bedard, he was being showered in balloons and kids walking all over each others’ heads as part of the final bow of Bane, the seminal melodic hardcore band who very much helped make the New England hardcore scene what it is today. Bedard returned to the stage a year ago with a new band called Antagonize, and after throwing down some demos and promos, they’ve released their debut EP Slip Death on the great Boston hardcore label Triple B Records this past week (label leader Sam Yarmuth designed its cover art much like he did for the vinyl reissue of the 2001 Bane classic Give Blood.) Bedard’s intensity has not slowed down with the passing of time either. In fact, it’s become exponentially more confrontational as he and the band thrash through fast, visceral existentialist dread. Throw them on a bill with the likes of Fury, Fiddlehead, Turnstile, or any of the countless names coming out of the Triple B roster right now, and Antagonize -- and Bedard -- know exactly what the scene needs at this moment.

Slip Death by ANTAGONIZE

Charli XCX feat. Sky Ferreira - “Cross You Out” [Atlantic Records]

On September 13th, Charli XCX will release her long awaited “proper” third studio effort Charli. Between years of experimental EPs and one-off singles, it’s been awhile since we heard her target her vision for mass consumption with major label approal, and she’s bringing some of music’s most intriguing voices into the fold with her to get that across. We already heard her team with Lizzo on “Blame It On Your Love” and Christine and the Queens for “Gone”. Its latest preview “When You’re Not Around” is one for Twitter pop fandom, however, as it sees Charli XCX joining forces with Sky Ferreira on the A.G. Cook-produced track. The two artists have been heralded as pop music’s most underrated creators for the better part of this decade, so to hear Charli and Ferreira’s paths cross seamlessly into this digital slowburn as they put the collective shit they’ve dealt with personally over the years behind them is a fitting way for it to happen.

Code Orange - “Let Me In” [WWE Music]

At least weekend’s WWE Summerslam, rebooted horror heel Bray Wyatt returned after months of being kept off screen in action with a brand new character persona called the Fiend that saw him evolving from the creepy bayou cult leader of previous and into a psychotic children’s program host who turns into a deranged monster wearing a mask designed by horror film makeup legend Tom Savini. In helping get this new terrifying character’s image over with the crowd and viewers watching was Code Orange, one of the most exciting bands in hardcore and metal going right now, who reinterpreted Wyatt’s old theme “Live In Fear”, a sinister, swampy piece of occult rock originally recorded by Mark Crozier, under its new name “Let Me In” and making it into their own heavy pummeling likeness, adding layers of deeper darkness to Wyatt’s Fiend character in the process. This isn’t Code Orange Kids first foray in soundtracking WWE superstars' themes, as they backed Incendiary’s Brendan Gorrone live as goth anti-hero Aleister Black made his way to ring during NXT Takeover Brooklyn III. Now that Black is on the main roster, inevitably he will cross paths with the Fiend at some point, making you wonder where Code Orange's loyalty will lie...

The Highwomen - “Highwomen” [Low Country Sound / Elektra Records]

The Highwomen -- a.k.a. the country songwriting supergroup of Brandi Carlile, Maren Morris, Amanda Shires, and Natalie Hemby -- are one of the most exciting things to happen to country music this year. On September 6th, they will release their eponymous debut album, and to date, the foursome have proven themselves quickly to be working flawlessly as a well-woven collective where nothing remotely resembling an ego outshine the other in its first coupling of singles “Redesigning Women” and “Crowded Table”. It’s latest is a goosebump-inducing sunset song that hears each member sharing a piece of the narrative that tell a greater story about their ability to overcome all and any hurdle. “We are the daughters of the silent generations / You send our hearts to die alone in foreign nations,” their voices collect in its final moments. “They may return to us as tiny drops of rain / But we will still remain/ And we’ll come back again and again and again.

Miranda Lambert - “Bluebird” [RCA Nashville / Vanner Records]

Beyond the Highwomen, Miranda Lambert is now joining the highly anticipated of new Nashville releases with her seventh studio effort Wildcard, due out on November 1st. Her last effort was the excellently crafted post-divorce catharsis The Weight of These Wings, but judging by the sounds of WIldcard’s first single “Bluebird”, Lambert is getting back to her old high jinks of sorry not sorry whip-smart lyricism and folding them into cool, flawless country-pop. “And if the house just keeps on winning / I got a wildcard up on my sleeve / And  if love keeps giving me lemons / I'll just mix 'em in my drink,” goes its chorus. Lambert’s undefeated streak will likely continue with this as well as her tour behind the LP, which sees her bringing along her Pistol Annies sisters, Maren Morris, and Ashley McBridge along for the ride on select dates for her Roadside Guitars and Pink Guitars tour, kicking off in September.

Octo Octa - “Can You See Me?” [T4T LUV NRG]

Back in July, Octo Octa, the electronic dance outlet of Maya Bouldry-Morrison, dropped “Spin Girl, Let’s Activate”, the leadoff single from her forthcoming third album Resonant Body, set for release on September 6th. The listen was fully in motion with a bright luminosity radiating from with Bouldry-Morrison she says was inspired after a year of tremendous change and personal growth. That expanded energy extends even further in its subsequent listen “Can You See Me?” in which she allows emotions to overflow onto the soundboard through an empath in samples vocals and a cosmic tidal of synth arpeggios running through whichever cracks in its constant break beats they can find. It’s invigorating, and both as a measure of her art and being, there’s really no avoiding Octa Octa’s presence being made known here.

(Sandy) Alex G - “Southern Sky” / “Near” [Domino Records]

Rocket was a very special album in the prolific catalog of (Sandy) Alex G, though it wouldn’t be a surprise if the experimental indie pop wunderkind’s new album House of Sugar, set for release on September 13th, bests it in its own way. So far, we’ve heard the warped and rickety storytale standout “Gretel” and the earnest ode to a friend and place passed on “Hope”, and this past week, he introduced two more in “Southern Sky” and “Near”. The former, which includes an animated video by frequent visual collaborator Elliot Bech, is a country-stained sigh featuring Emily Yacina that hits a similar backwoods bliss that “Bobby” did two years ago, while the latter retreats to pinbacked repetition, wonky loops and samples that warp the canvas with Alex Giannascoli’s signature smeared fingerprints. (Sandy) Alex G will also be touring extensively behind the effort starting this October, with dates featuring the likes of Tomberlin, ARTHUR and Corey Flood.

Taylor Swift - “Lover” [Republic Records]

The last we heard of Taylor Swift was her divisive post-pop call-out Reputation, and with its tinge of industrial bangers and stadium-translating success, it’s safe to say it aged better than what anyone expected upon release. Her new album Lover is on the way next week, and so far, two of its early singles have been absolute dogshit while the other was just so-so. In the streaming era, it comes no surprise that there will be 18 tracks total on the album, which means there’s bound to be some duds. Hopefully they’re more like it’s title track, though. Jack Antonoff seems to be one of the few people who knows what to do with making Swift sound like a breath of fresh air in spite of her missteps in this lash-batting late night bar crawler that is the Jekyll to Swifty’s drunken Hyde. She really could have reverted full-on back to country-pop and easily gotten away with it...

Queen of Jeans - “Only Obvious to You” [Topshelf Records]

The surprises within Queen of Jeans’ sound are unraveling themselves quickly, but in subtle gestures leading up to the dreamy Philly indie-pop band’s release next week of their sophomore effort If you’re not afraid, I’m not afraid. So far, they’ve delivered a devastating blow to the ego in doo-wop form with "U R My Guy” and searched for a way out of a dead end relationship on “All the Same”. “Only Obvious to You” steps away from pastel lights and balloon grandeur, leaving plenty of room fordark space in between two warm bodies for the distance to hit hard. “Love will fuck you over hard,” Miriam Devora repeatedly reminds herself in the listen’s closing moments, and in the listen’s video shot at Philly Pride, they want to do their community a solid by letting it be known that no matter how you love, pain is pain, and your feelings are valid, too. This autumn, they’ll be mending broken hearts on the road alongside tourmates From Indian Lakes.

Whitney - “Used to Be Lonely” [Secretly Canadian]

Someone in Whitney’s camp had to have intentionally planned to have the Chicago country soul duo’s sophomore effort Forever Turned Around be released at the final breaths of summer and the cusp of autumn’s cupping season on August 30th, because “Used to Be Lonely” is the kind of listen that tugs at the heartstrings of both the, uh, lonely and not so lonely, in a way that will make those with someone feel warm gratitude to have someone by their side, and those who don’t romanticize about the day it happens to them. Its accompanying visuals, directed by Austin Vesely, are on point just as well, as it captures a budding romance developing at the kind of midwestern country fair in a small town you’d hit up some weekend in September when you could use a slice of simplicity in your life of how even the most humble moments can feel extraordinary if you’re sharing them with the right person. If not, Whitney will bring it to you when they roll through your city this autumn.

[icharchivist]

perso-rant underneath and at first i intended it to be more light hearted but welp cant dive into myself without digging the bad stuff so just ignore this as rambling.

(idk if the cut works on mobile so as usual blacklist #ichapersonal to skip it , its quite long)

its night and im noisy and all but yknow part of the reason m/lb is such a healing show for me and i rewatch it every couple of days?

i cry everytime M.arinette's family is on screen pretty badly bc i get so envious all the time. i hate my shitty family (and often can relate to A.drien's ressentment) so just seeing such a /healthy/ family being often shown litterally brings me to tears. im like C.hat in the animan episode when he stares at the family picture with a sweet smile (another detail that stupidly make me cry who allowed th i s)

like. i dont relate to A.drien's relation to his family but some of the emotional effects is often a moment of "welp. mood." and being kinda sad /for him/ even if i can feel it for myself too. but then with M.arinette's family everytime they get to be on screen i realize how happy this sort of dynamic makes me and it makes me /so envious/.

like my mom is an artist and an excellent cook but she always barred those interests from me bc it was /hers/ and it was for /her ego/ and this attitude just killed every curiosity i had and remplaced it with a complete unability to care.

i used to bake as a kid but my mom was always shutting down everything i was doing, and if i was asking for help or recieps she would just tell le "it's a secret just watch " and never letting me know tf she was doing so i stopped lmao. everytime ive tried meals since it was only for myself and with a hard mocking from family and mom saying she had a better recieps and i should just let her do so i dont even try it often. (moreeven now that the kitchen is opened to the living room and they're super judgemental when im in it)

i was messing with drawings and paints in her workshop when i was a kid but she would always point out flaws and take my tools to correct it without telling nor showing me how and it killed it, it took me until my 14yo to start doing mindless doodles and then my breakdown when i was about 20 to seriously try back to draw and do art and try different tools (until my right hand made it impossible for me to hold a tool and the failure still feels yknow)

i wanted to sew things and make clothes (at the time for my dolls) but my mom was never letting me touch the tools (that we HAD since not only she made clothes but her mom actually had a fabrique shop. like. right next door. i think it became part of my mom's trauma hating her mom and refusing us to connect with her, more so with what happened when i was 7 and we lost contact with them but still, the damn irony. and i cant remember if my grandma ever let me close her sewing material but i was a damn kid after all) so this is another thing i didnt pursue

i wanted to pick up music (piano mostly) bc my uncle is a musician but my parents never wanted to invest in that because they already gave a piano to my sister (that i wasnt allowed to use) so ye that was dropped lmao

and i started to write when i was about 11 and it was that /one thing/ i didnt need help for from anyone, completely self taught, with my own ways and tools, and my parents were always dismissive of it, never listening to me, always telling me it wasnt important, that i should focus on something else, and after other circumstances that added to that i dropped writting around my 17/18yo and it had been painful to even try to write again since.(i came back to writing around my 20yo a bit before my breakdown but after it happened it started to die out and i felt exhausted and stopped after a few months and since then i've never been able to pick up writing again ay.)

(and im not touching the obsessive elements bc like- the fact she does it for her crush makes it different, but the sort of things she does? taking pictures and putting them everywhere in her room when she hyperfixates, making overcomplicated schedules and such? i litteraly do that with fiction. i made a freaking timeline for this show. i am currently working on organizing codex from d.a and an approval guide for christ sake. and im not talking about my multiple fandom shrines in my room and the fact i legit have one for m/lb made from pictures found on merchs.

or also the fact i have a lot of passions i'd love to share and seeing M. play video games with her dad for exemple makes me so bitter when all i get is backhanded insults from my parents when i bring it up.)

So sometimes i see M. and part of me is just in awe, loving everything about her. the other part of me tho... i feel... a bit robbed? like she's such a creative kid, she's incredible and she inspires me everyday, and i cant help but think how i would have adored her when i was a kid. (im not even kidding, as a kid i requested my mom a costume of black cat for h.alloween and a l.adybug costume for the carnaval. i have pictures of that at my dad's place sadly it kills me. also my room when i was a kid used to be covered with l.adybug stickers like. HELL my mom doesnt care about my interests but last year she bought me a M/LB winter callendar (bc its been years i was mentioning i wanted one, a selfish whim but oh well) and i had a huge double take bc i was certain she didnt remember me talking about this show- and she did not. when i asked her why, she legit told me "because she reminded me of you as a kid with your pigtails your obsession for l.adybugs". like!! i cant even stress how kid!me would have adored this show and especially LB./M.) (the pigtails too this time i have proofs around there i used to carry them all the time until i was bullied for it at school. (bullying at school instead of good friends also adds to the difference in question tbh lmao))

there is something so... weird into seeing the parts of yourself that you cut yourself from in a character, and see that the main difference is because of how the family (and bullies) treated those elements so drastically differently.

my family was always neglectful but differently than A.. the things i relate to with him is how he specifically still holds on hope that his father will do better at least just for one day and his reaction when he's left down saying he's just used to it. and like normal, not every kind of abuse are the same and all but i still relate enough to feel sad.

but M. is always a whiplash of feelings like i could have been this sort of girl in a better environment.

at 13/14yo she was already making stuff up, baking, designing clothes, doing art, she was doing so many things, even forgetting the superhero part. she was being happy being a creator at her pace and with encouragement. at 13/14yo i was starting to show concerning signs of d.epression because i was trying to handle my parents's divorces and the multiple trials that followed that /i/ had to handle by finding middle grounds, allowing some of my father's blackmail to avoid worse, and by litterally having to collect infos from mails everytime to prove against some of his arguments to the judges. and my sister refusing to talk to us for a year, which caused us basically to feel very bad thinking of the eldest sister who ran away from home, and having to handle my father's harrasment and emotional abuse of constantly belittling me (fuck this was the age he legit told me i would probably end up a p.rostitute so ye!!! fuck that!!!) andd the fact my mom was also falling apart from all of it on me and i was always supposed to cheer her up while i was having a hard time in a new school and new environment away from the very few friends i had and again feeling abandonned by my sister which freaking sucks after already had suffered that from our eldest one.

but M. makes me cry every. goddam. rewatch. its like maybe the ultimate wish fufilling story of just how i would have loved my family to be. of how i think i could have turned up.

and that realization hits so badly everytime.

there's a thing with my hyperfixations where i'll always find a way to tie it back to my traumas. i dont know if im pulling straws, or if the things are there. for having watched m.lb when it came out unfazed and only got hit with that realization upon rewatching- i feel it was more me realizing "there is something there that is touching me more than before" and having an introspection to get it.

and i think the difference is that- before my breakdown the characters and stories i related to where the eternal optimistic-yet-damaged "never give up!" type of characters. When things started to go downhill to my breakdown and since then the fictions that talked to me the most were all dealing with guilt coming from toxic environment that werent your fault per se but you pierceved that way. my way to relate were to characters who felt deeply connected to their guilt (peak being c.loud of f.f7 that even topped it with the deadly skin disease making him lose will to live (because ye that happened. still hate to watch out for that so ye), and memories issues, you would have told me at 13yo when i first watched that movie that this would be what i would relate to him about 7 years later i would have laughed at your face.), which translated with pushing people away and self destructing habits.

and i know i watched m.lb the first time around that time, when i was 20/21. and that may be why i didnt feel that. that my concerns were too elsewhere to realize that. That i was too focalized on how i felt like i failed by suddenly breaking under the pressure, having all the things i've kept burried kicking me out at once, and that i couldnt afford to be a burden to anyone. and it translated with me loving characters like that because in most cases their friends ended up reminding them of what was important - and sometimes just getting frustrated about your fav being as dumb as it forces you to pull yourself back together lmao. not always working but it was there.

now im 23. i cut ties with my father for about 3/4 years now, with all the shitty things that ensued out of the last trial where he sued me and his still-happening harrasment (sometimes silly sometimes scary). My mom and step dad are suffocating me more and more everyday. my health had become so disastrous i cant even manage to go school or find a job. And more than ever im frustrated and angry.

and i think it may be a shown of recovery? perhaps linked to therapy? of while i still have guilt of falling apart- /they/ are the reason i fell apart. and I'm yet to have proper apologizes for it. i grew furious at my family. of how much i feel robbed.

lately im so angry at everything i lost, was taken of, stolen childhood all of that- because of my parents, mainly. (hell even the bullying at school - in primary school it apparently started bc of gossips about why my eldest sister ran away from home, and in middle school it was first bc my parents insisted on sending me to private school where i was an outcast. which then had me truly embrassing the outcast persona that had made it impossible for me to be at peace in the two others middle schools i went to. highschool saved my social life tbh).

i think it's therapy and recovery that is making me shift the blame and feel so angry at them. so bitter. and suddenly i see in an innocent kid show a "what could have been". same starting personality, different people to channel this.

and this is. frustrating.

but it makes me love it even more. idk if its driving anything else than ressentment but at least for the time of an episode I'm in a bubble of a.lternative universe where i can forget about my life and feel satisfied at once.

like finding a piece of myself that i deliberately broke and burried to never think about it again, and realize far later how it missed to the whole, and how damaged this piece is now, but still is.

and there is something incredibly healing about that. i would never have thought there would be this much healing out of this anger and yet satisfaction. what a strange feeling.

fiction is funny that way. the things people can get out of it to deal with their own psyche are so different one person to the next.

it's just so weird for me to go from "i relate to the horrors this character went through" to "and fuck those horrors. let me think about what could have been if this didnt happen."

even moreso knowing i had this piece of fiction before and didnt approach it that way. there's a time and a mindset for everything. apparently now was the best mindset for me huh

.......

so ye apparently i cant like something like a normal person and have to go on about how it connects to my deeply rooted traumas lmao.

anyway it's been eating me up for weeks now and it's 4:45am i have absolutly no impulse holding me back. if you sat through this piece of work im sorry. just needed it to get it out of my chest.

i'll go back to hugging my cheap-yet-lifesaving c.laire's l.adybug pillow now

good night o/

[thedarklightwithinus]

Another Life | Two

A/N; WOW! What did I do to deserve all this love? This started as a request and it’s turn into so much more... I decided to do a little something with Max as I love her character! Max and Dustin are my fav’s from the kids.

Summary; When her mother’s work gets in the way, just how will Y/N cope with trying to figure out what to do. Not my gif.

Pairing; Billy Hargrove x Reader

Words; 2K??? Wow.

Part One | Part Three | Part Four

The silent treatment in which Y/N was receiving from Billy was intense. After muttering that his dad was going to kill him, he stared blankly at her for a few moments before leaving. He had not spoken to her since that moment. Though she herself had not tried to approach or talk to him in any way, she had noticed he seemed to be everywhere she went within Hawkins High.   Whether she be exiting her car in the school parking lot or retrieving her belongings from her locker, he was always there, watching. It didn't take her long to notice his presence. She had also noticed that many of the students seemed to walk a little farther away from her and not once had she been accidentally nudged on her way to class.   The days passed by, turning into weeks. Due to her mother being a midwife and having influence in the hospital, she had gotten her daughter a date for her first scan. Though ultra-sounds were not commonly used, her mother had insured Y/N that it was perfectly fine and no harm would come to her baby.   The morning of the scan, Y/N had fallen out with her mother. Though she had tried her hardest not to feel let down, she couldn't help but feel that way. Miss Y/L/N had all but stated that she would be there for Y/N and attend the scan with her. However, she had been called out to the nursing home a town over due to one of her patients health.   "This is important!" Y/N had exclaimed from her spot at the kitchen table. "You promised I wouldn't be doing this alone!"  

"I know I did, sweetie..." Her mother sighed, grabbing her bag from the table and throwing her coat on. "But Mrs. Whittle is a fragile lady. If I'm being honest, I don't think she'll make it through the day. Why can't you ask a friend to go with you?"   "Because I haven't told anyone!" Y/N called out as her mother made her way to the back door.   "I'm really sorry!"   With that said, her mother had left the house. Y/N knew she was being a little insensitive. Though she had never met this Mrs. Whittle, she most probably had a family who were sat around her, hoping she survived. No longer than half an hour later did Y/N find herself sat in her black Ford Thunderbird, outside the last house she had thought she'd end up at that day. Billy Hargrove's. She had already told him about the pregnancy and look how that had turned out? She was by no means about to tell anyone else.   Though he heart was beating abnormally fast, she plucked up the courage and swung the door to her car open before exiting and closing the doors behind her. Pulling her coat tighter around her, she made the short walk up the path to the small porch before knocking on the front door gently.   At first, no one answered. She was slightly praying no one was home and she'd just have to go home and tell her mother she had missed the appointment. However, luck had not been good to her lately. The front door was pulled open while Y/N sighed deeply.   It was a child. Well, more of a teenager really. Y/N had been expecting Billy to wrench the door open but instead a red-headed girl had pulled the door halfway open and poking her head out. The girl raised a brow at Y/N who smiled softly.  "Max, right?"   "Uh... Y/N? You're a friend of Mike's sister."   "Yeah, I am... I was just wondering if Billy was in?" Y/N asked, trying to keep a small smile on her face.   "He went out this morning." Max informed her, pointing to the driveway where Y/N frowned. Was she really thing stupid? The boy went nowhere without his car.   "Oh, right." Y/N nodded, looking back at Max before giving her another smile. "Sorry to bother you... Have a nice day, Max." She spun around, making her way back down the path towards her car.   She should have known to check for his car. When had he ever been apart from it? It took him everywhere and anywhere he wanted to go.   "Are you okay?" Max called out, causing Y/N to stop and glance back at her. "Billy's a dumb ass and I'm sorry if he's done anything, I know what he's like... Did you need anything? Maybe I could help?"   "I'm fine." Y/N told her, smiling for effect before she raised her own brow at Max. "Shouldn't you be out with friends? It's the weekend."   "I'm not welcomed by all of the group." Max informed her, sighing for dramatic effect. "They think I'm trying to take someone else's place."   "Oh..." Y/N felt bad for the redhead. By no means was it fair that she was treated as an outcast by anyone. She had not been in Hawkins for longer than a year and she was already being treated as if she was here to overtake someone's place. Maybe it was because she related to the girl slightly, but Y/N couldn't help offering. "If you're not busy... I could use a friend right now?"   "So you're not okay?" Max asked, moving to the side as though inviting Y/N in. "I knew it!"   "No... But I will be." Y/N told her before nodding to her car. "I've got an appointment at the hospital, could use a hand to hold.   "Just let me get my shoes!" Max almost shouted, spinning and running through her house. 

"Is that an actual baby?" Max asked the midwife in awe.   The car ride to the hospital had been one of the most awkward and strangest conversation Y/N had ever had in her life. She had not woken up that morning with the intent to have a conversation about the baby growing inside her with its father's thirteen-year-old step-sister.   However, Max had taken it well. She understood the Importance of keeping it to herself and knew that Y/N really didn't want it getting out. Max's bright blue eyes began to sparkle as she told Y/N of her love for babies which shocked her slightly as Max did not seem like the type of girl to like babies.   "It sure is!" The midwife replied, chuckling at the enthusiastic girl who leaned close to the monitor.   Though the picture was by no means great, A baby was defiantly growing within Y/N and in that moment, she knew it was for real. Her baby was real and she loved it unconditionally.   "The baby is growing perfectly." The midwife informed Y/N who let out a breath of air. "Heartbeat is steady... It looks to me as if you're carrying one baby." Y/N frowned slightly, she hadn't even thought of there being more than one child. "I'm just going to write down the measurements and print your picture and then you're done."   "Is it a boy or girl?" Max asked, tilting her head at funny angles in order to take in the baby from every perspective.   "Well, it's too early to tell." The midwife told her, writing the measurement onto her clipboard before moving to a beat-up printer that sat in the corner of the room. "With the next appointment, we will know."   "Will you tell me?" Max asked Y/N quickly. "What it is?"   "Of course." Y/N replied, chuckling at the girl's enthusiasm. She was suddenly happy that she had invited the red head along.   "Here we go." The midwife handed two pictures over before smiling and escorting the pair out of the room.   Max and Y/N followed after the nurse, looking down at the pictures in awe. It was much clearer to see when the picture was still and not moving on a screen. The black of the picture forced the white and greys to enhance themselves which showed the pair the outline of the baby.   Once they had made it back to the car, Y/N started the engine. She took a deep breath and looked at Max from the corner of her eye. "Thank you."   "Your welcome, Y/N." Max grinned before frowning slightly. "I know it's not my place to ask you this... But you came to my house for Billy. I know the two of you don't hang out and since you were going to the hospital... Is it his?"   "Mhm."   "Wow..." Max whispered. "He never told us... But then again he doesn't really tell us crap."   "It's okay." Y/N smiled softly. "If he wants to carry on the way he is, I don’t need him."   "You have me!" Max was quick to point out, grinning brightly at the fact that she could help.   "I know." Y/N replied, plucking one of the pictures up and handing it to her. "Here."  

To say thanks, Y/N had taken Max out for a bite to eat. They had sat opposite each other in a small booth to the back of the diner, talking about anything and everything. From school to home life to friends and towards the end, Billy.   However, all good things come to an end as Y/N had decided it was time to get Max home. Her parents had no idea where she was and she didn't want to worry them.   "Promise we can hang out again?" Max asked as the pair sat in the driveway of Y/N car that sat a little down the road from Max's house due to the other cars lining the street.   "Course we can!" Y/N exclaimed, grinning at the girl as she exited the car.   Max followed and the pair walked up the street towards the house, muttering about the things the could do. The pair were rudely interrupted when a car came speeding down the road, music blaring as it came to a stop next to them.   Y/N sighed deeply, pulling her coat tightly around her as she took a glance at the car. The all to familiar blue Camaro was parked beside them, a glaring blue eyes Billy staring Max down. "You little shit."   "Hey!" Y/N exclaimed, moving forward as she stoped in front of Max slightly. "Talk to her again like that and I'll make sure you're eating your balls for the rest of your days!"   "Where have you been?" Billy demanded, ignoring Y/N as he glared Max down. "I've been driving all over this piece of shit town trying to find your ass! Even had to speak to those little friends of yours!"   "If you've hurt them I'l-"   "She was with me." Y/N interrupted, raising a brow as though daring Billy to speak to her the same way he had done Max.   "Get your ass inside." Billy grumbled, never once looking away from Y/N.   Max grumbled as she said a soft goodbye to Y/N before stomping her way up to her front door. Billy waited for her to be out of sight before exiting his car and glaring at Y/N slightly. "Why was she with you?"   "I had an appointment at the hospital and didn't want to go alone." Y/N muttered, avoiding looking in those piercing blues. "So you asked a thirteen-year-old instead of me?"   "I didn’t think you'd want to go!" Y/N exclaimed, frowning as she sighed deeply. "Believe it or not, I came here this morning to ask you but Max said you were out... I didn't want to go alone and she seemed like the only person around. She's mature for her age, Billy. She's a cool kid... You haven't spoken a word to me since I told you so why start now?"   "Bit hard not to when you turn up here." Billy told her, pointing to his house as he tried to keep his voice down.   "I was taking Max home." Y/N told him, narrowing her eyes. "You didn't have to stop and talk to me!"   "I'll come to yours tonight."   "Wha-"   "I'll come to yours tonight." Billy hissed, watching his house closely. Y/N went to turn around but Billy stopped her, putting his hands on her shoulders and forcing her to face him. "Go... We'll talk later."   "Okay..."

[nenesleepyhead]

Original/blank post here

answers to

⚰️ horror movie ask game 🔪

a nightmare on elm street: top 5 fav songs rn?

Stabbing in the dark, thanks god it’s Friday, IT is the end, animals (these four by Ice Nine Kills) and the last one the Ukrainian Eurovision 2021’s entry Shum by Go_A

hellraiser: do u have any tattoos/piercings? do u want any?

Double no on that, I like them on others but simply I can’t envision myself with them

the texas chainsaw massacre: what’s ur favorite food?

Fruits and anything with mushrooms or sweets :3

my bloody valentine: are u in a relationship/do u have a crush?

Nope and nope, I’m single and happy right now

scream: what’s ur favorite movie?

A tie between Freddy vs Jason, Halloween (1978) and Wrong Turn 4

carrie: if u could have any superpower, what would u pick?

Regenerative/healing powers for sure, especially since I bump often on forniture and it’s very useful in general ✨

the shining: do u prefer warm weather or cold weather?

Cold weather, I can always put other clothes on to feel warmer but I can’t skin myself if it’s too hot

us: if u could change one thing about urself, what would it be?

My body build I’ll say the height it’s alright but I’m always struggling trying to loose some weight uff 🤔

jaws: what’s something u wish u were good at?

I really don’t know what to write, maybe being good at NOT procrastinating 🤔

hereditary: do u drink, smoke, or do drugs?

Absolutely not, for smoke and alcohol I don’t even like the smell so I never wanted to try them, and if in some food there’s alcohol I spit it out since I can’t stand the taste, (when people gift my family with chocolate I always double check if there’s alcohol in them) and drugs never seen the appeal or such so never tried them either but that’s me what other people do it’s up to them u.u

nosferatu: do u have a lot of friends?

Just a few but they are all great friends and that’s what matters u.u

friday the 13th: do u believe in astrology?

On some degree yes

child’s play: have u ever committed a crime? what was it? *adjusts wire* if not, would u ever commit a crime?

Nah and I don’t plan on committing any

frankenstein: what’s ur favorite website?

A tie between Tumblr and Instagram but just because are the one I use the most

suspiria: what’s ur favorite book?

Sabriel, the first of a trilogy and its as good as unknown

re-animator: are u neat or messy?

Neat and messy, neat with works relate things but my bedroom desk is a mess, all the rest of my things are super neat and my computer it’s full of folders just to be able to easily found anything

the ring: if u could visit/live anywhere in the world, where would u?

I would keep living here in Switzerland but I want visit Scotland, Ireland and Japan :3 🏴󠁧󠁢󠁳󠁣󠁴󠁿🇮🇪🇯🇵

midsommar: show ur lock screen + home screen!

I draw myself my Lock Screen and my Home Screen it’s a fan art I found years ago of one of my all time favourite manga character, Nakano Makoto from Kyou kare ore wa!! (Unfortunately I don’t remember the name of the artist nor I could find it but if you know who made it let me know so I can credit them properly :3)

halloween: what’s ur favorite holiday?

I’ll say Hollywood even tho here we don’t celebrate it, I just love the vibes and the various decorations

silence of the lambs: what’s something ur looking forward to?

I’m always looking forward to go out and eat sushi with my friend or just have a movie night with them at my place :3

the exorcist: are u religious?

Nope I’m an atheist even tho my mum is a Christian (even tho she don’t practice it) but yeah I mean religion it’s not a big deal in my family my father just don’t care. Plus from my mum family we probably would have been called witches since it’s a common thing for the women of the family to “have the gift”, being good with tarot cards, having premonitory dreams and so on u.u (aka I’m proud to have inherited those ability)

paranormal activity: do u believe in ghosts/demons/aliens/magic/anything paranormal?

Sure I live with a couple of ghosts and like written above it’s quite a normal thing in my family (from my mum’s part)

saw: give a controversial opinion >:3

Eh not really my thing plus I don’t know what to say .-.

alice, sweet alice: what would u describe ur style as?

Dark-ish but I wear mostly large and comfy t-shirts with things i like on them (music bands, characters, games, or so) with skinny black jeans, but depending on the mood of the day I can be more punk-ish or more goth-ish

the fly: what is ur biggest fear?

Height u.u it’s the only fear I got

the evil dead: do u have any weird/obscure interests?

Research demonology and those kind of things

the vvitch: what’s ur favorite historical time period? (without the old-timey bigotry)

Victorian u.u love the dresses and the art style and just the vibe of it but especially the clothes 👀✨💙

psycho: do u collect anything, or want to? if so, what?

Action figures and stones as onix, ruby, and so on

night of the living dead: what’s ur fav hobby?

Writing, reading, drawing and sewing

the blair witch project: what’s ur biggest pet peeve?

Bad table manners for sure it’s just a thing I can’t stand

alien: what character do u relate to a lot?

I’ll say Jason, I love to live near the nature and being left alone to relax and chill and I don’t talk so much. And I’m very shy with new people irl

invasion of the bodysnatchers: how do u think ppl see u? how do u see urself?

Others probably see me as a shy short weird woman. I see myself as a chill person who enjoy the company of her friends

house: do u have any pets? do u want any?

Yup a cat who I love my old boy Kira 💙

the thing: what’s ur job? (or dream job if u don’t work?)

A freelance Illustrator but right now it’s so difficult for me to find work offers here in Switzerland .-.

final destination: what’s something everyone else hates, but u love?

In my family/friend group: things horror’s related

rosemary’s baby: what’s something everyone else loves, but u hate?

In my family (my sisters and mother, not really my father) romance movie, I can’t stand those movies (if the love story it’s just marginal it’s okay but if it’s what the plot is all about I just can’t, I would die of boredom)

[hiraethtae]

BTS Fic Rec | part 1

**- fav ***- amazing fics i love

see you through the screen by FlaminkoMage ***

There was Taehyung, a popular internet blogger, and there was Jeongguk, one of the most famous idols in Korea.

AU where Taehyung manages to befriend his favorite singer without even knowing it.

note: it’s ongoing! ( no smut, slow burn )

#Taehyung\jungkook

min yoongi, the park jimin stan by lovelivesinthedream 

Min Yoongi is a few things: college student, amateur music producer, composer, lyricist, and part-time cashier. Min Yoongi is not a fanboy for idol groups. No way.

At least not until he sees BTS perform for the first time and is instantly captivated by Park Jimin.

note: it’s ongoing! ( no smut, fluff )

#yoongi\jimin

Before I Fall by riinkuun (corporalrin) **

Jimin isn't all too fond of the popular idol group, BTS. Okay, so he knows most of their songs and even has a favorite member. And he might have memorized at least one piece of choreography for one of their songs. He would really like them more if it weren't for the notorious douche bag of the group, Jungkook, weren't in it. However, when he and Taehyung get a chance to meet up with the idol group, Jimin gains some unwanted attention from a certain someone he'd rather have no involvement with.

note: completed! ( enemies to lovers, fluff, every fangirls dream )

#jimin\jungkook

all because of you by xxdevilishxx for chunshi **

jeongguk frowns, ruffling his own hair, and whispers, "even if you’re j-hope in front of the fans, you don’t have to play that part in front of the rest of us. i like hobi hyung a lot, but i like hoseokie hyung even more.”

(based off festa 2016 where the anonymous letter for hoseok stated how sometimes he made the members uncomfortable by being too happy and excited)

note: oneshot ( one of my most fav fics because i’ve never read anything like it. pure and sweet. wished it was longer tho ;3; )

#jhope\jungkook

I Want You To Be My Night by TheOrgasmicSeke 

The Big Bad Wolf may be big, but he's really not all that bad. He's more like an over sized puppy who just wants to be loved.

note: oneshot! ( jungkook is the cutest werewolf and yoongi is a caring person )

#yoongi\jungkook

그 손을 내밀어줘, Save Me by TheHalesNyx **

That’s when Min Yoongi, self-declared ‘simple man’, turned the corner onto his street, mid-yawn, his breath escaping with a small squeak he’d never admit he made, when he collided into another body, and his ‘simple man’ life was thrown into chaos.

In which Jungkook is angry, nearly a high school drop out, and alone, and Yoongi is an adult who is struggling, and somehow, they find someone to save them in each other.

note: completed! ( has the same vibe like ‘i want you to be my night’ but this whole fic just made me have faith in humanity again )

#yoongi\jungkook

the moon and the stars (are nothing without you) by wowoashley (orphan_account) 

based off of Real Events that happened to me the other day. i ended up screaming to siobhandestele about it and they told me to write a fic about it. and the word moderation does not exist in my vocabulary so :) based off the prompt: "Taekook college AU! The college tour guide raved about the uni's friendly atmosphere and amicable student body, but wanted a high five from a cute student and all he got was a glare"

note: completed! ( cute & funny, I really enjoyed this one. jungkook is hella awkward and tae is personality goals. seokjin isnt the nicest chara here so be warned )

#taehyung\jungkook

The World by RoseFangedLion  ***

They say if you go and put your ear to the Heart of the World for long enough you'll hear the name of your soulmate whispered out in its heartbeat. But Yoongi fell asleep on that thing almost every night and he had never heard a word. Not that he's bitter or anything...and his bitterness certainly doesn't drive him to leaving his comfortable home to go out adventuring as a mail currier or anything...not at all. That said there is a distinct possibility that Yoongi is more sarcasm than human.

note: completed! ( This fic is on a completely differnt level then any other fic i have ever read. World building, amazing story line, amazing imagination and just the whole idea. Yoongi’s character here is absolutely stunning and the plot twist at the end had me sighing wistfully. i highly recommend you guys to read this fic it’s highly underrated )

#yoongi\taehyung

preorder bonus by abdicar 

Jimin is a lesser known streamer who works at a video game store during the day. He’s pretty happy with his routine and his small audience, at least until famous youtuber AgustD decides to take an interest in his channel.

Thankfully, he’s too busy developing a crush on Yoongi, one of the store’s new regulars, to worry about it.

[aka the gamer and streamer/youtuber au nobody asked for]

note: oneshot! ( aka a really cute fic. really liked the concept. highly recommended )

#yoongi\jimin

The Songbird and the Sea by MissterMaia ***

In a world where dominance of the sea is an endless battle between pirates and mariners, Park Jimin is content living in his little village on a small, uninteresting island by the eastern mainland. He wants nothing to do with the bloodshed of good and evil, the heartless killing of both innocents and condemned, the constant establishment and disruption of order. What he wants is peace, to live his life in the same town he was born in, to spend his days in the beautiful forest, and to use the powers of his Blessed Rune to nurture the home he loves so dearly.

But when his island is attacked by pirates, Jimin will have no other choice than to do as they command and leave all thoughts of peace behind in favor of boarding the Agust, a pirate ship captained by the infamous Min Yoongi, Black Fox of the East.

note: ONGOING BUT ALMOST FINISHED! ( enemies to lovers, slow burn. amazing world building. plot and characters, i bloody love this fic, if i can quote it like a novel i will. it’s absolutely breathtaking with amazing unique concept just like ‘the world’ fic and i highly recommend you guys read it!!!)

#yoongi\jimin

refrigerator humming, chewing gum and instant karma by locks

Taehyung sets the flowers down on the dining table, plucking the card off the little holder. "Dearest Taehyung, just wanted you to know that I'm thinking about you. I hope you're thinking about me too. Love--" he pauses and squints before cocking an eyebrow and pursing his lips. "Hyung, why is the boss of your little boy band gang professing his love for me?"

Yoongi drops the noodles on the floor with a loud curse as he burns his hand.

Or, Taehyung's been trying his hardest to avoid Yoongi's criminal life for a long ass time, but a cute kid and his infuriating father keep pulling him deeper into the mix.

note: completed! ( THIS FIC OMGOD, it’s funny, it’s cute, it got me squealing here people! taehyung is great with kids, jungkook is hella smooth, this shiz has explicit sexual content and gang story oml it’s good people! also taehyung scares people i bloody love his character here! )

#taehyung\jungkook

white balance by sasireun ***

Yoongi brings his camera along to the event without thinking much about it, but Jimin really is too cute to resist photographing.

(Alternate-reality where Yoongi becomes a Jimin fansite master.)

note: oneshot! ( god i loved this concept so much! if any of you have more fics like this send me a message! it’s well written and cute and i wish it would continue )

#yoongi\jimin

Blow Me Like Your French Horn by ohdizzy for jiminiminiminie ***

In which Jimin undergoes a transformation from Cinnamon Roll to Sinnamon Roll and Jeongguk is a little too competitive, a little too tsundere, and a little bit too moony-eyed for his own good.

(A tale of red converses, sandpit wrestling, shitty best friends a little too obsessed with playing Cupid, emotional constipation, existential crises, and that one body roll Jimin does that makes Jeongguk re-evaluate his life)

“i see that you adore playing your loud ass trumpet at random moments in the middle of the night, well fyi i happen to be a master at the French horn so fuck u i challenge you to a brass off” AU

note: completed! ( this damn fic had me wheezing continously across this storyline. jungkook is a tsundere and good is this story amazing, highly recomended if you want to have  agood day it will certainly bring up your mood. also the bloody fic name i cannot- )

#jungkook\jimin

King of the Library, Knight of His Trade by madigraye 

Moral of the story? Don't fuck with Jeon Jungkook or else you'll end up ruining your perfect attendance to chase his coattails.

note: oneshot! (Taehyungs character here reminds me of the tae from ‘the moon and the stars (are nothing without you)’ fic and i really liked his character there so hell yeah. a funny chain of misfortune keep tae meeting kook and it left me cackling)

#jungkook\taehyung

Constraint by Harlot ***

Jungkook is young and he is more acquainted with confusion and poor-decision-making than he’d like to admit. Despite being only 19 years old, he sometimes argues that he’s been through and seen some shit. He is never sure where he’s going to end up and he’s not entirely sure what kind of future is waiting for him. He is often not sure of a lot but he is certain—absolutely certain—that he’s not gay. Alternatively, a story in which Jungkook meets Park Jimin and doesn't like him whatsoever. There's just something about him... there's just so much about him. Jungkook really can't stand him. In fact, he can't stand him so much he can't quite seem to get him off of his mind.

note: oneshot! (This story is bloody real to me. Awesome characterization, about the same level like the world and the s&s. Jungkook’s character development is amazing and jimins character is hella strong. I love this story. Please read it. No matter how painful it is)

#jungkook\jimin

Six Impossible Things Before Breakfast by Kavbj 

Taehyung has magic in his veins and Jungkook's determined not to let it kill him.

note: completed! ( The fisrt BTS fic i ever read. really original, well written, can be confusing at times but i really liked the concept and taehyungs character)

#jungkook\taehyung