#tinybruised

[tinybruised]

wish starving wasn't the most boring thing in the world, you've gotta stay so busy to distract yourself but like, im a boring ass person lol ive got nothing going on

[gabapentinblues]

journal update 3.26.2025

somehow it became aries season without me even realizing, maybe it really is time for a new beginning. would love to experience some change.

i ate a small breakfast today and two spicy potato soft tacos and like three bites of cheesecake. feeling good bc i at least know that ive consumed the least calories of everyone i had lunch with. still really on my weightloss mission.

not sure how the rest of the day will go. going to just try to have a very small dinner, hopefully something with veggies and a cup of hot tea. need to remember that hunger means its working and just hope for a lower number in the morning.

im back to being completely disordered and posting about it on here. i made a new ed sideblog and im transitioning my main into a gore and smut blog, not that anyone will really notice, but my new blog is @tinybruised

didn't sleep in super late actually today, had my coffee, feeling pretty meh. i need to put clothes away and journal and email abt my w2's and look into an iop for myself. lots to do. i think maybe i can do it.

i spent the morning writing nasty smut lol. posted it on ao3 and hoping for some hits and comments, but we'll see. i requested a community on here too but idek if its still active. i really hope it is. just indulging in my guiltiest of pleasures rn.

been really in the writing mood, maybe i'll come up with a consistent story to update on.

my fps are moving soon and they will be wanting me to visit but im not even really thinking about that.

im more worried that i need to get a job, that im spending too long wasting away doing nothing, but i dont know what to do instead. i just feel guilty for enjoying myself.

[rosheruuu]

What dpi do you have your canvas set to when you draw?

300 ! i’ve never changed it bc I’ve been advised not to but  I also don’t know what it does lmao

[drawkill]

Is Wonder human?

Yet another mystery.

I guess you guys will just have to keep reading Die Wonder and find out.

[softjminies-moved]

finally updating my bday page with the messages that are still sitting in my inbox! (from a month ago oops! sorry!)

@keithkogana, @tinybruised, @hinamie + @leviackermsn

you’ve all been added! <3333

[tinybruised]

putting my clothes away and it's triggering me so bad, like i'm too fat to wear basically all of it, I'm so uncomfortable all the time, i'm like violently suicidal over it

[tinybruised]

i just have to keep trying, i can't give up on myself, i need to see change this month

[tinybruised]

every morning all i can think of is how much weight i could have lost by now

[tinybruised]

food means nothing to me, it doesn't bring me joy, i avoid it at all costs

[tinybruised]

literally at this rate in going to be fat forever, like sure it's nice to go to the store and come back w a pint of ben and jerrys for me as like a surprise or whatever but no one understands how frustrating, triggering and upsetting it is for me

[tinybruised]

im in control of everything i eat, im so good at saying no

[tinybruised]

back to starving fr

[tinybruised]

june is going to be my month of figuring it out, how to be consistent again, what works best, im not giving up, then july, august and september are going to be months of drastic change🌸

[tinybruised]

going to keep posting every day, logging what i eat, and remembering what i'm focused on

[tinybruised]

🌸things i miss about my old body🌸

visible collarbones/ribs in chest

biceps smaller than elbow joints

visible spine and ribs

THIGH GAP

FLAT CHEST

veins in my hands

much smaller stomach

my clothes used to be loose

sharper jawline

slimmer fingers

i swear i had clearer skin??

no upper arm fat

no back rolls

HIPBONES

[tinybruised]

drafted a post w all my triggering pics, i think ill probably just keep it for myself tho