#unparentally

[caralara]

it's such a, idk, unfatherly thing... everyone knows you can't make a 6 year old kid sit and listen through an entire album and then ask for their opinion? it's such an unparental thing to do imo lmao

Sorry what? Y’all don’t have much knowledge about children, do ya💀 I could totally make my brother sit down and listen to music if i wanted to. Depends on how you get them excited about it. And it’s definitely not an unfatherly thing to do, da hekk. If he did it he probably did in a way that was child friendly, not like he would do it with us. Jesus. I totally would show my new album to my kid regardless of how old they are.

It seems like you don’t know much about kids?? Which 6 year old is willing to sit down 45+ minutes to listen to an album that’s very much not his taste? lmao yeah sure

Of course I was able to have my cousins or brother sit down when they were that age and show them a song, maybe 2 tops. But then the attention and interest is on the next thing.

And Freddie very clearly is an iPad baby, so the attention span is even shorter. Also you see what kind of music that family listens to and it deffo isn’t Louis‘ music

[vimbry]

gotta stop having dreams of media I can't watch. had one about a 70s-ish style action animation with a protagonist I can best describe as like, human m.ettaton? very tall, long hair, similar kind of expressions/demeanour. personality sorta like the basil take on s.herlock holmes, but slightly calmer. in his element being a boisterous and charismatic social butterfly, but in the respect he flitters to person to person. staying in his company for so long reveals how awkward he is at general conversation, even tho he does enjoy meeting/charming and listening to people.

he even had a watsonian sidekick, who I can't really describe visually, but was a competent though largely pessimistic and slightly pathetic person who would much rather be unbothered at home, but finds the protagonist and their lifestyle addicting. the ron s.toppable genre of partner. and just like the comparisons, they had a very overtly romantic chemistry. there is absolutely nothing about this guy that screams ideal match, but his sad wet eyes and abject misery has enraptured the protag (his own little meow meow lmao). they both find each other and their general outlooks on life equally intriguing and refeshing.

bc my brain Knows what it wants lmao, there was also small orphan sidekick (really is just basil again), whose relationship to the protagonist was a cordial, but upfront unparental "you can stick around, but don't get any ideas I'm not your parent or anything 🙄" with little moments and interactions of. hehe yes he is he likes themmm. they really should not be there none of this is safe. but they're having fun, so it's ok.

they were some kind of spy or vigilante-type group. pretty famous, because the plot was set at a small local convention themed around their exploits. people were cosplaying them, and it was one of those plots where a main antagonist had infiltrated the place in plain sight, but the costume qualities were so strong they couldn't tell which one was them.

[candyredmusings]

                                                An empty cradle remains -                                               They'll say I was a monster

[fireflyfish]

.

[bromomentum]

the funniest thing to me about imagining swindle and lockdown having two dumb clone sons is that they're literally the most unparental mechs in the galaxy.

[In the middle of the night] [Phone rings] Starscream: Mhhm... what is it? Swindle: HELP! THRUST STARTED TO STEAL ALL OF DIRGE’S STUFF AND THEY ARE DESTROYING THE PLACE, WHAT DO I DO??? Starscream: Welcome to seeker parenthood, glitch.

[tagthescullion]

Unpopular opinions: Frederick/Athena > Sally/Poseidon

Hades/Maria>>>>>>>>>> any other god/mortal ship...I’m not a fan of either the ones you mention bc they both involve an immortal shoving a kid onto a person who didn’t want them and then disappearing like the unparental cowards they are

Hades isn’t a good father by a long shot but it’s sort of implied he was much more present when the kids were young and he didn’t quite abandon maria

[faesystem]

okay so we've all heard of calling someone who's a good parental figure mom or dad by accident, right?

what if if when character a is doing something very unparental (yelling, maybe like training the other in combat, something fun like that), character b calls them mom/dad?

imagine

i m a g i n e

[parenting-flags]

Anaparental Flag

Anaparental: referring to a monopersonal/unipersonal family, wherefore a familial nucleus/entity consists of one person only. 

Similar to unparental and soloparental, but this could be also autoparental (self-parenting). Reminder this is socioaffective/socioaffectional/socioaffectionate not biological.

Anglophones uses more -parenting than -parental(ity)/-parenthood apparently, I’m leaving here some keywords: anaparenting, uniparenting, autoparenting, unparenting/nonparenting, soloparenting, monoparenting, solopersonal, autopersonal, socioparenting, socioparental.

Those terms are used in economics and juridically in some countries, however they don’t need to be institutionalized/constitutionalized/academicized for it to exist.

[scumbagmordremoth]

I don’t call me OCs my children bc then I look at Embla’s in game model and feel distinctly unparental feelings.

[agoddamn]

i want bryn and sigurd to be a happy couple together, , ,and maybe be like parents to master sobs im desperate for more parental figures

Sigurd’s bond lines are...rather unparental, haha.

You are the Master. I am the Servant. There is no room for anything more between us...is what I thought. ...But it seems like that wasn't the case.

Master, let me tell you once again. This sword, this body, it does not matter if you use everything I have as you please. You are a person worthy of this. You'd never misuse me.

Hard to say who makes a good parental figure...

[0ooi]

talking to my siblings and my dad is so hard. i love my siblings so much i would do anything for them. my brother was really struggling with online school and it was causing a lot of tension in the house and it made me feel like oh, thank god. it wasn't just me. but he just swapped over to a private school and is doing really well now and im so happy for him and the whole family seems really happy and perfect now. but that means that i was the problem the entire time before. the whole time i was living there i was just so unparentable and unlovable and horrible that i ruined the whole family just by existing there as myself. there isn't room for me. they closed the door on my way out. and yeah they like me now but they like me exclusively on their terms, at an arms distance. i don't know what's wrong with me. i tried so hard to bend myself into a shape they would accept and stayed quiet and they still never liked me then. so at a certain point i just decided to be myself and avoid them as much as possible because it's fucking unpleasant being around people who dislike you and criticize you constantly. idk my real issue was with my dad's wife. she was so genuinely cruel to me past age 14. it feels like my dad just kind of decided to throw me away for his new family, and he gets to visit this frankenstein experiment gone wrong on the island of lost toys out of guilt when he needs to. i feel so in between. i feel no where. i feel like i have no one. not my mom. not my dad. my siblings are perfect but they are literal children and i would never ask them to support me emotionally, and honestly they don't need to know about all this shit maybe even ever. it's just not their problem, they didn't do anything wrong. but fuck man. i feel so cast aside. it feels hollow. is it my fault? i think i did this. it was my choices. i fucked up my own life and they left because i was too much. they did not want me, and now i don't have a home. fuck. i just didnt develop correctly and they didnt know what to do so they threw up their hands and said get this fucking freak out of my house. i don't belong anywhere. maybe here. isolated in this fucking room away from anyone i can hurt.

[caralara]

What a stupid thing to say lmao the more he talks about the kid the more its obvious he is not a father-what six year old would listen to the whole album?

it really is... kinda weird. Like. why?? it's such a, idk, unfatherly thing... everyone knows you can't make a 6 year old kid sit and listen through an entire album and then ask for their opinion? it's such an unparental thing to do imo lmao

[forthencho-pacino]

The Intellectual’s Guide to Types of Parents

Angry Parent --> Parentarentino Scary Parent --> Pare(nt)normal  Smart Parent --> Parent-thesis Toxic Parent --> Parentula Void Parent --> Parent horizon MY Parent --> Parented Parent you can vibe with --> Parentable Parent you CAN’T vibe with --> Unparentable

[mostlygay-partlycloudy]

I was fundamentally unparentable. My dad was not around often but if he had been it wouldn’t have made any difference- I would have just been like ‘I’m going out for a cigarette’ and gone and like f*cked three dudes and smoked meth.

Sam Lansky Throwing Shade podcast

@throwingshadeshow

[mavwrekmarketing]

Media playback is unsupported on your device

Media caption‘Rob’: ‘My wife now shows the sort of symptoms of someone who’s suffered domestic abuse’

More than a quarter of adopted families are in crisis, according to a survey by the BBC and charity Adoption UK.

More than half of those surveyed reported living with a child who was violent, including being punched, kicked or threatened with knives.

More serious incidents included hospital visits and sexual assault.

Despite the challenges, most families said they were glad they adopted. Adoption UK said families needed skilled help and support.

Almost 3,000 subscribers to Adoption UK’s newsletter responded to the survey by BBC Radio 4’s File on 4 programme.

More than a quarter of families, when asked to describe their adoption, said they were facing serious challenges that impacted on the wider family, were at risk of breakdown or disruption, or had already been disrupted.

Almost a half said their adoption was “challenging but stable” and just over a quarter described it as “fulfilling and stable”.

‘We needed help’

Image copyright Empics

Jane knew adopting a little girl from care would not be easy, but nothing prepared her for what came next.

“She was developmentally delayed, so when she was three and a half, all the severe behaviour started to come out”, she said.

“She could be lovely one minute and very violent and aggressive the next.”

Jane, not her real name, and her husband said they asked their local authority for help, but it was not forthcoming.

“The whole time we were saying ‘we’re in trouble, she needs help; we need help.’ But getting anything was a struggle.”

As years went by, their daughter’s behaviour became more extreme. Her husband, Keith, found it difficult to manage.

“She became obsessed with blood,” he said. “She was self-harming and would write on the walls with her own blood. She would pull her own baby teeth out. We reached such a stage that our daughter had become unparentable – she was only six or seven. I couldn’t cope.”

In the end, Keith made the decision to send their daughter back to care. The couple say it was the most difficult decision of their lives.

“She’s in such turmoil, but her behaviour is not her fault,” Jane added.

“She needs help from professionals to make sense of what happened to her. You should be able to get that help.”

The family’s local authority would not comment on their case, but said they were committed to supporting all adoptive families throughout their journey and they “seek to learn lessons” when adoptions do break down.

Modern adoption

In the UK, around 5,500 children are adopted every year.

The majority of adoptions involve children over the age of one, siblings and children with disabilities, who have been taken into care.

Many have suffered trauma, neglect and abuse which can result in a range of complex developmental and psychological difficulties. Research suggests almost three quarters of adopted children have significant mental health problems of one kind or another.

Parents who deal with the fallout of these problems, say family life can be extremely difficult.

Image copyright iStock

Many parents described being punched, kicked or threatened with knives. But some reported more serious incidents, including hospital visits and sexual assault.

Dr Sue Armstrong Brown from Adoption UK said it was important not to demonise children.

“We’re talking about trauma-fuelled violence from children who will have witnessed the unthinkable in their early lives,” she said.

“Adoption is not a silver bullet. These children’s problems don’t just disappear overnight. Both adoptive parents and adopted children need skilled help and support.

“Despite the challenges, adopters are resilient and these results reinforce that adoption can work for the vast majority.”

File on 4: Adoption is broadcast on BBC Radio 4 on Tuesday 26th September at 20:00 BST. If you missed it you can catch up on the iPlayer.

Have you got something you want investigating? We want to hear from you. Email us.

Related Topics

Children

Adoption

Parenting

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[parenting-flags]

Unparented/Parentless Flag

Unparental/Nonparented/Nonparental (unparenthood/parentlessness): not having parents.