#voicelesslove

[loving-all-for-loki]

Voiceless Love: Chapter 2

Misunderstanding

Loki x reader, Bucky x reader

Word Count: 2782

Warnings: fluff, Jealous!Bucky, Bucky being soft

Tag List: @caffeineoverloadandstudying @zizzlekwum

“Nice to meet you, I’m Bucky.”

He raises his hand to shake yours while holding his metal arm back. Reluctantly, you take his hand, but your eyes do not leave his. Within the glimmer of your eyes, Bucky can still see fear. He can’t decide if it’s because you’re nervous and new, or if you still has the same beliefs of the people, that he’s a monster.

“I won’t hurt you, if that’s what you’re afraid of. I don’t know what you’ve heard about me from the news, but-”

He stops at the sight of you shaking her head no.

“Well, I’m glad you don’t believe them.”

You give him a gentle smile, but it’s more wide and full of life than the others have gotten.

“Are you not able to sleep either?”

You shake your head no. After pointing to your head, you carefully show Buck her hands. He takes them and notices how bad you are shaking.

“Anxiety?”

You nod your head.

“Do you mind if I give you a hug?”

You back up suddenly. The fear flows back into your eyes as you stumble over your own feet. Bucky takes a step back, wanting to say something, but not finding the words in the realization of your fear.

“I’m sorry.. I didn't- I didn’t mean to freak you out…”

You shake your head no. Grabbing the box of Cheez-its you found, you run back to your room. Bucky littles to the little pitter patter of your feet running down the hallways with the feeling of sadness and hurt. He didn’t mean to freak you out, but he misunderstood the openness.

Slowly, Bucky shuffles to your room to find your door still slightly open. Not wanting to ruin her privacy, he decides not to go in, but instead he whispers close to the door, “I’m sorry, again. I didn’t mean to make you uncomfortable.”

You sit on her bed, listening to the soft spoken soldier apologize.

The next morning Bucky wakes up on his warm sheets. The sun peeks through his shades as he stretches awake. He hears a paper sound when he stretches his arms out and notices a small little note fall from the side of his bed onto the wooden floors. Looking around, he notices his door slightly opened, like whoever had entered his room left in a rush.

Leaning over the bed, he picks up the paper and attempts to read the scribbled handwriting.

You didn’t make me uncomfortable, I’m just not used to touch

In his sleepy state, Bucky forgot about his interaction with you. Reading the paper reminds him and brings a smile to his face. If the way you write is similar to your voice, he’s sure you sound like a little mouse, but perfect. Your handwriting is so small and messy, it reminds him of when he learned to write in secondary school. Everything had to be in cursive since a lot of people didn’t write in print back then. Your handwriting is like a bad cursive practice.

After getting ready, Bucky heads his way out of his room into the main living room where people are trickling in. Natasha and Steve look straight out of the gym with how profusely they're sweating, while Wanda is making spirit dancers with her powers to impress Sam and Thor on the couch.

But Bucky’s eyes go straight to you sitting on the bar stool at the island, legs crossed, and hunched over a bowl of cereal. You have a set of dark green silk pajamas on. Out of all the outfits in the world, Bucky thinks your pajamas are the cutest he’s ever seen someone wear. He sits down to the right of you and watches your head move slowly up to look at him. He chuckles at you with the spoon shoved in your mouth as you look at him with big eyes. The corners of your mouth slowly rise until you have a slight smile on your face then you look away and shovel another spoon in your mouth.

“I read your note,” Bucky whispers. You look up with him, without the spoon in your mouth, “I’m glad I didn’t make you uncomfortable.

You smile and nod.

“I’ll be more aware of the touching thing.” Bucky watches your smile become wider which makes his heart jump. Who knew a small thing like you could make him feel small as well.

“Did you sleep well last night?”

Nods.

“I’m glad. I noticed last night you had a lot of your stuff unpacked. Are you getting settled?”

Nods.

“That’s good. Does it feel like home, yet?” He chuckles.

You shake your head no.

“I get that. It took me a while to feel completely comfortable here. I’ll be honest, Y/N, I still struggle with seeing it as home, so don’t feel too bad if you never see it like that.”

You look back up at Bucky and smile. Taking a pen out of your pajama pocket, you reach for Bucky’s opposite arm and take his palm. At this point, most of the other avengers are looking over at the pair, giving each other quizzical looks.

“Since when did these two become friends? It’s only been a day.” Natasha asks.

“I have no idea. Last night she was pretty distant with Thor and I,” Steve said.

“Maybe your whole good ole’ Captain-ness scared her,” Sam snarks.

Looking down at his hand, Bucky watches you write thank you on the palm of his hand, right under his thumb.

“Of course,” he says with a smile, “I’m always here to talk if something is bothering you.”

You smile at him before finishing your bowl of Lucky Charms. Setting your bowl in the sink, you turn to see everyone staring at you in awe. She grabs her blanket around her to cover herself more in defense.

“Guys, stop staring at her. We had a conversation last night and became friends,” Bucky scolds.

“You had a conversation?” Sam asks.

“Well, more like I spoke and she nodded, but yeah. So leave her alone, stop pressuring her to speak. It’s weird and I should know.” Bucky turns back to you. “I can show you around the tower if you want to get away from them.”

You nods her head excitedly before Bucky asks you what your hobbies are. You hold your hands together flat to make a little book symbol.

“Reading? I can show you the library.”

Your eyes light up and everyone takes notice, even from the side of their eyes. You walk over to Bucky who puts his arm out for you. Looking at him nervously, Bucky’s gentle smile relaxes you and you slip your arm around his. Everyone gives each other a frantic ‘did you see that’ look behind your backs as you both walk over to the library.

Bucky looks down at you walking beside him. Your’e not that short, but your small frame compared to him makes you look like a tiny thing. He chuckles inside thinking about how they look, like a lion carrying his tiny sub in his mouth. You’re so cute with your Y/H/C hair swaying as you walk and your fingers wrapped around his biceps. He stops suddenly.

You stop and look back at Bucky with her eyes furrowed. He’s looking down at your hand and realizing it’s wrapped around his metal arm. Not knowing his insecurities and self blame, you don’t understand why he’s frozen in place. You walk closer to him and place your hand on his shoulder to get his attention.

“Your hand… it’s on my metal arm.”

You nod your head, still not understanding. Bucky looks at your eyes with a slight smile.

“Are you not scared of me?”

You shake your head no which shocks Bucky beyond belief.

“I’ve never met anyone who isn’t the first time they meet me.” You shrug which makes Bucky laugh, “Well, I’m glad. Come on, we're almost there.”

You reach the elevator and move up a flight before wandering down another hallway to the doors. Bucky pushes open the door to reveal the library. Your eyes go wide in awe which makes Bucky’s heart skip another beat. Your pure joy makes him so happy and knowing he was able to bring it to her himself brought him as much joy as this library did for you.

He would never lie to himself, he knows he likes you more than he should after knowing you for a day and a half, but there’s something that pulls him towards you. Your sweet innocence makes you so desirable in so many ways. All he wants to do is have you for himself, but also protect you from anything that could harm you.

You run around the library, discovering each aisle and row. You come back by Bucky and jump in joy. He secretly hopes you’d hug him, but you don’t come close to it. Your overwhelming joy is cut off by the sound of someone coughing. The pair turn to see Loki sitting in a seat, head in a book.

“Sorry to interrupt, but you are bothering me, so please get what you need and leave.”

“I’m sorry, Loki, but this library doesn’t belong to only you,” Bucky remarks.

Loki looks up from his book, scowling at Bucky, until he sees you standing by. It’s the girl he had seen earlier, the one who appeared different from the rest. Maybe he could be a little more gracious to the mortal.

“I am the only one who uses it, am I not?”

“Not anymore, Y/N really likes to read so I’m afraid she will be joining you more.”

Bucky doesn’t like the thought of you being alone with Loki, but he also knows you’d never be into him with how rude and uptight he could be. Plus, he also knows you would never bother him since you’re quiet.

“Well, I guess I don’t mind being joined by the quiet one. She seems like good company.”

You smile at Loki’s comment. Maybe the god of mischief isn’t as bad as he seemed.

-

Bucky left you in the library for a little bit while he went to spare with Steve. He didn’t like the fact that you were alone with Loki and he let that get to him.

“What’s going with you?” Steve asks.

“Nothing.”

“Your moves are sloppy and I can tell your head isn’t here. What’s bothering you?”

“Is it normal to get attached to someone quick?”

“Depends on the situation. Are you talking about Y/N?”

“Yeah, I know I’ve only known her for a day, but I feel protective of her.”

Steve joins Bucky on the floor, staring out the windows, “Maybe because you understand? You’ve been where she has, scared, helpless. She’s not one hundred percent sure on what’s going on with herself then she was thrown in the Avengers. It’s quite sudden and you can relate to it.”

“Maybe you’re right.”

“Some time away will be nice, too. Give you some space from her to think.”

“What do you mean?”

“Tony didn’t tell you? We’re leaving for a mission soon. All of us but Y/N and Loki.”’

-

You and Loki sit in silence in the library, both absorbed in their books. You can’t make out what Loki is reading, but it looks like some kind of Russian romance novel. You go back to Macbeth, which happens to be her third time reading it. You're so immersed that you don’t notice the tiny glances Loki is sending your way.

He’s intrigued by the new Avenger. Small in frame, innocence in appearance. She doesn’t look like the rest, pained by the world. She looks more carefree, timid, and dare he even say enjoyable. Besides the fact that she doesn’t speak, he doesn’t mind her presence, but he hates that. He’s never minded a Midgard before, so why her? He also notices the way you were his color unknowingly, but loving how it looks on her. There’s a weird feeling in the pit of his stomach looking at her, not really knowing what it is.

Neither are really sure how much time passes. Loki has gone through multiple books, but he notices you are still reading the same book. It’s at least been hours. Surely you aren’t that slow of a reader.

“What is it you’re reading?” Loki asks hoping he can spur some answers out of you. He’s never been so intrigued by a human.

You sneak a finger in her book to hold her place before showing him the title.

“Macbeth? Good selection, didn’t take you as a Shakespeare fan. You look like one of those mortals that would read werewolf smut”

You crack a little smile and go back to her book, not giving Loki anymore attention. From the way Bucky spoke about him, you’re not so sure if he’s safe or trustworthy. He seems nice and not like the other’s descriptions of the god. They say he’s silent and judgmental, but the man sitting in a three piece suit while reading doesn’t radiate the destructive chaos. You look up to see him staring at you. Furrowing her eyebrows, you move over to sit by him on the ground.

“What is it, little one?”

Shrugging, you point to him and make a little sign to show him watching her.

“Why am I looking at you?”

You nod your head passionately.

“I’m staring at you because you’re the first person to stay in a room with me for more than five minutes. Quite shocking, to be honest.”

You chuckle inside and shake your head. She reaches out for his hand, but he stays still. He shoots you a confused look, but you simply roll your eyes and pull for his hand more. Hesitantly, he gives it to you, watching every move. You pull out the pen in her pocket you had used on Bucky and write on Loki’s wrist.

You’re not bothering me, so why would I leave?

“I bother most.”

I don’t mind you. You seem nice.

The sudden compliment disturbed Loki. Quickly, he stands up and drops his book.

“You don’t know anything about me,” he says boldly before exiting the room in a hurry.

You sit there, watching the green eyed god haste fully leave. Did you say something wrong? All of a sudden, you could feel water rising in your eyes. Silently, you let out a couple of tears before putting your book away and shuffling to your room.

Right before you made it to your room, you bump into a large object. Slipping, you grabbed onto the closest thing which was cold metal. Bucky tries to keep his arm still and grab you as you struggle to regain your balance.

“Woah, woah, are you okay?” His eyes are full of worry as this little thing fumbles around.

You nod, trying to keep your head down so he couldn’t tell you were crying, but gently, Bucky lifts your head up to meet his eyes.

“You’ve been crying?”

You shake her head no and try to keep walking, but Bucky holds you tight so it looks as if you are walking into a wall. You give him a hard look, but it’s tired and longing. Bucky takes your hand and walks you the rest of the way to your room. He waits at your doorway until you motions for him to come in. Bucky sits on her bed as he watches you fold her blanket and sit down next to him.

“What happened, doll?” Bucky asks as he wipes off the remaining tears from your cheek.

You let out a little sigh and pull out the little ball point pen.

Loki incident

Bucky stiffens up and stares at you, his eyes burning into your head. If he did or said anything, Bucky would…

Don’t kill him, he didn’t do anything

Bucky doesn’t loosen up, but waits for an explanation. You give him a soft smile, the kindness and happiness returning to your eyes.

He can’t take compliments

Bucky drops his head and chuckles, “I think you’re the only one who’s ever complimented him.”

As soon as the words leave his mouth, Bucky realizes that wasn’t the right thing to say. He sees the sadness come back into your eyes and realizes he misunderstood what happened between you and the god. It burdens you to hear such words and it burdens him to know you care.

“He’s hard to be around, doll. You’ll get used to it.”

But inside he’s holding back everything from running to Loki and punching him for talking to you.

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[loving-all-for-loki]

Chapter 5: Dangers of love

Loki x reader, Bucky x reader

Word Count: 3273

Warnings: graphic description of injury, swearing

Tag List: @caffeineoverloadandstudying @zizzlekwum @magicalpieex @lokiyoulittle @daddysfavoritesexkitten @buckylokisimp

A/N: Okay, so I got a little carried away with this chapter because things are heated! We got some Bucky vs Loki conflict as well as hurt Bucky. It’s time to spice some things up in this love story.

“We need you! Bucky got hurt and may not live! We need you to save him!”

Panic begins to set in as you scramble to get off of Loki. You run towards Sam who’s eyes still dart between you and Loki who is laying on the floor, face covered in a disappointed appearance. Sam grabs your hand and pulls you toward the Quinjet, running as fast as you can.

Loki lays on the ground and watches you run off with Sam. The feeling of your body on top of him lingers and his eyes miss the sight of you. He knows Bucky is hurt and your job is to heal, but he can’t help but feel jealous. You at their beckoning call. Pulling you away from him. He wanted to keep you there on top of him… forever, but Bucky once again steals you from him. Loki finds his way to his bedroom, saddened by your sudden absence and filing his time with something else.

You and Sam rush in the Quinjet as the door starts to close. You sit down and stare at the floor, dreading the sight that is about to be in front of you, as Sam rushes to get some basic gear to cover you. He straps on a helmet and a bullet proof vest to you in a frantic manner, struggling to clasp the buckles. His hands are shaking, so you place yours on his, forcing him to look at you. You give him a look of comfort, yet control. His anxiety melts at the calm fear in your eyes, knowing you’re just as scared but determined.

After 1 agonizing hour, you land in some unknown desert country filled by tents and soldiers. Sam grabs your wrist and starts sprinting to a broken and abandoned building surrounded by American soldiers. Steve stands at the door waiting for you. Stress blows off of him as he sees Sam dragging you behind him. 

“Hurry, he’s barely holding on!” Steve yells.

The three of you enter the building and rush to the second floor where Natasha is leaning over Bucky, putting pressure on the wound. 

“Two bullets below the heart and one to the left. They barely missed, but he’s bleeding out like a bitch. There was also a large boulder on him so I’m sure there’s internal damage,” she informs.

You drop to your knees and lean over Bucky. He looks up to you, face full of pain and desperation. Even in his own demise, he gives you a smile and warm eyes. You shake your head at him, You’re not supposed to die you idiot, you thought. Taking Natasha’s hands, you force her to push on his bullet wound harder, implying she isn’t putting enough pressure on it. Steve and Sam stand behind you panicking, but informing the rest of the team through the intercom. 

“Yeah, she’s here… I’m not sure… let’s hope,” Steve mutters.

-

Earlier…

Bullets are flying through the air as Bucky attempts to run around. Their camp was attacked late last night when no one was prepared and the battle has been going on for hours. No one was sure where it came from at first, all that they did know is that they’re surrounded and out manned.

Steve and Bucky started running first, trying to get to the general and end things, but as buildings started to fall down, things got harder. Soldiers were getting trampled, crushed, hit. Rocks were flying everywhere within the rubble falling.

Bucky loses track of Steve, the two getting split up somewhere about ten minutes ago. Leaning against a large chunk of wall, Bucky sits and regains his breath. He looks over the wall seeing that no one is near him. After all of this fighting, Bucky prays they’ll be taken home finally, knowing the opposing enemy is almost out of tricks considering they did a surprise attack.

He can’t wait to get home. He can’t wait to feel you jump in his arms, lay on him as you read, lean your head on his shoulder when you can’t stay awake during a movie. Two weeks is too long to go without you after spending every day together for a while. He started getting antsy to see her three days ago. Knowing he can’t stay in his location forever, Bucky starts to get up and dash.

“Bucky, look up.” Steve says over the head set.

Bucky looks in front of him to see Steve hiding behind one of their trucks looking over by him.

“To the left, there are three soldiers, go the opposite direction and they won’t see you at all.”

Bucky nods to him and takes a deep breath. Turning to his right, Bucky stands and starts to sprint. Gunshots go off and completely drown out Steve yelling “to my left, not yours!”. He barely takes a step before feeling an awful pain in his shoulder. 

In slow motion, Bucky feels himself slip and get pushed down by an invisible force. Another burst of pain hits below the first one and one to his other shoulder. His vision goes blurry as he falls, his back slamming into little rocks and pebbles. Hitting his head on the ground, everything goes dark.

Steve watches as his best friend gets shot three times. Fear settles in as he sprints over to Bucky, but the enemy sees him running. Quickly, they shoot the corner of the building next to them, sending shards down around Bucky’ unconscious body. Steve stops and blocks his face from the oncoming rubble, panicking about losing Bucky in the dust.

“Everyone, Bucky’s down! I need back up!” The dust settles and Steve sprints to Bucky and looks down, “Wake up, Buck. Come on.”

Steve takes Bucky by his shoulders before realizing the bullet holes beneath his thumbs. He wildly lets go of Bucky as he stares at the open wound. Blood gushes out of Bucky as he lies in the sand. 

Next thing Steve knows, there are S.H.I.E.L.D agents surrounding him with their shields and Natasha is joining him on the ground. Natasha carefully picks up Bucky’s shoulders as Steve grabs his ankles. They attempt to drag him to the building when they notice opposing men in the main floor.

“Someone clear the building for us! We need to get him to safety!” Steve yells over the intercoms.

“I got you.”

Tony flies over in his suit, shooting down the men in the building and around the perimeters as Steve and Natasha drag Bucky inside. 

“We’ve got him secured, but we need someone quick before we lose him!”

“Steve, doesn’t Y/N have healing powers?” Tony inquires.

“Holy crap, yes. Sam! Get to the Quinjet fast, we need Y/N!” 

“Copy that.”

Sam sprints to the Quinjet with adrenaline bouncing through his veins. 

“I need someone to watch the building as we wait,” Steve orders, “Nat, put pressure on the wounds, I’m going out to defend for a moment.”

“Will do.”

Steve rushes out of the building to find the agents from earlier setting up a temporary barricade. Thor runs over out of breath and covers for them. Steve watches Sam running back, praying that he can get there in time with Y/N to help Bucky, but for now they have to keep fighting.

-

Steve watches as you stare at Bucky, praying that you know what you are doing. He can see the panic in your eyes as you look down at Bucky. He knows that fear. It’s doubt. It’s the same doubt he felt when he was first in charge of a mission. The tears start coming in your eyes as you look up to Steve.

“You’ve got this,” he comforts, “I know you do.”

You look over to Natasha and nod for her to let go of the wounds. She quickly pushes herself away as you take control. Putting pressure onto the wounds, you close your eyes and focus. You feel the powers surging through your body and pouring into Bucky.

Steve and Natasha stare at you in awe. Light emerges from your body, surrounding you and Bucky, but not blinding them. You look so graceful as you pour your heart and soul into him. The blood starts clotting as it comes out before it stops all together, but as it stops, they watch as the light from you slowly flickers. You start to wobble over his body, looking more tired as you go on.

“Is it working?” Sam asks.

“I think so, but somethings wrong.” Steve answers.

Steve rushes to your side, holding you up from the back as you start to fall over. You start to get light headed as you pour all of your energy into Bucky. Opening your eyes for one second, you see the wounds not closing up between your fingers. They’re too deep for you to comfortably heal. 

You take your hands off of Bucky for a second to lean back. Steve catches you as your arms barely keep your body up as Natasha rushes over back by Bucky, applying pressure again but not as much.

“Are you okay?” Steve asks.

You lift your hand to shake it, signaling you're fine before holding up your index to signal that you need one moment. Steve holds you tight, almost laying you across his lap. He looks over to Sam who’s staring at you. 

“It’s like she ran out of energy,” Steve comments.

“It might be too much for her. I think we have to pull back and go home.”

“Sam, you know how much I love Bucky, but we’re so close to finishing this.”

“I can contact Fury or Coulson and see if we can get sent back, the rest of the soldiers can stay here and fight until called.”

“Then do it.”

Sam furiously runs back to the Quinjet to get a better signal, hoping they’ll be able to take Bucky back home. Steve looks down at your tired body sprawled across him. You start to waken a little bit more, looking over to Bucky in determination.

“Wait, Y/N. Do you think it’s a good idea to-”

You ignore Steve as you push Natasha off of Bucky. You get up on your knees before taking Bucky again and emptying all your energy. The brightest light Steve and Nat have ever seen comes out of nowhere, shining from your body. 

People describe a terrifying event that their “soul had left their body”, but you literally feel every fiber in your body get drained. You lose breath, surrendering everything you have in you. Bucky starts to stir, coughing as he gains consciousness. Steve rushes to his side and holds his head up. Shielding his eyes, Steve sees your eyes go completely white, glowing as if the sun had entered you. Your face has gone blank as you black out, losing yourself in healing Bucky.

Nat runs to your side as the light disappears at once. You fall over as she catches you, trying to keep you from hitting your head on the ground. There’s silence in the building as Nat and Steve attempt to get both you and Bucky up before Sam stumbles in.

“We can go back! What happene-”

“No time to explain,” Steve interrupts, “Avengers, fall back. We’re heading home immediately.”

The Avengers sprint back to the Quinjet. Sam carries you as Steve carries the limping Bucky back, setting you both down on the floor. Clint and Wanda run inside as see you and Bucky swapped appearances. Wanda starts asking a million questions that Nat tries to answer as they take off.

“Steve,” Bucky coughs, “what’s going on?” “We’re heading back to the compound. You were injured severely and Y/N saved your life.”

“But I thought she was back at the-”

“Sam got her after you got shot. She did everything she could.”

Steve nods over in your direction. Bucky looks over to see you passed out on the ground, Natasha and Sam tending to you. He starts to panic at the sight of your paralyzed body lays next to him.

“Bucky, you have to hold still. Your wounds are still-”

“No, no, no, no, no, no.”

“Bucky, calm down!”

Bucky whips his head to look at Steve who’s frantically trying to keep him on the ground in a sederatary fashion. 

“I can’t Steve. Is she alive?”

“She’s fine. You need to worry about yourself. She’s tired.”

“You promise?”

Bucky searches for an answer in Steve's eyes, but he knows Steve can’t promise that. No one really knows if you’re okay. There’s a tense silence throughout the quinjet as it flies home.

Loki hears the engine of the quinjet as it lands. He rushes off the couch to stand at the tower’s bridge doors, watching it land. As the door opens, he hurriedly walks onto the bridge looking around each Avenger as they walk out to see you. Steve and Tony stop when they see the writings on Loki’s body, recognizing your handwriting from the notes on Bucky’s arms.

“What the-” Tony mutters.

“Where is she?” Loki asks worriedly.

Sam steps off the quinjet carrying your body bridal style. Loki rushes to him as the other Avengers stare at him in awe. Laying his hand on your forehead, Loki reads your brain to find you asleep. He forces you awake with his magic, having awakened in Sam’s arms. You look up to see Sam holding you and Loki next to you. Reaching out, Loki takes your limp body from Sam, carrying you to the med bay as the Avengers follow behind. Bucky watches as he leans on Steve’s shoulders, anger rising in his body from seeing Loki’s appearance and behavior towards you. Everyone glances at one another in disbelief of the sight in front of them.

You don’t remember falling asleep again, but you wake up in a bed in the med bay. Loki sits on a chair next to you asleep. By the looks of it, he hasn’t been able to sleep in a while. His hair is all distressed and there are bags forming under his eyes. You try to sit up before you feel a pounding headache start.

Loki wakes at the sound of you rustling around in the bed. He sees you gripping your forehead in pain.

“You’re awake. Careful, your body may still be weak,” he warns.

You smile at him for being so kind to you. Loki reaches for  a water bottle sitting on the stand beside your bed and a small container of pills. 

“Take these. I was told they would help.”

He hands you the little bottle of Advil and the water. You timidly take them from him and take one pill. Your hands are still shaking from how tired you are. Loki gives you a gentle smile, but you can see the sadness behind it. Your state of being concerns him, seeing how exhausted you are. “Are you feeling okay?”

You nod weakly with a smile, trying to comfort him, but you know until you have complete strength, nothing will make him feel better. The two of you sit silently for a moment before Loki gasps and pats down his pockets.

“I forgot… I have your pen.”

He hands you the ball point pen you use to write on him, which makes you smile. Why does he have this on him? You think.

“Just in case you need to tell me something you can’t sign.”

You look at him confused.

“I can read minds.”

All of the thoughts you’ve had about him run into his head. You freak out internally, wondering what all he had read.

“Don’t worry, I don’t read it often. In fact, this is the first time I’ve read your mind.”

He leans forward and sets his leg on your bed, pulling up on his pants to reveal his ankle.

Good.

Loki chuckles at you. He likes being able to talk to you, even if it’s through pen and skin. 

The Avengers sit outside your room, listening to Loki talk to you. They give each other quizzical looks as they hear Loki laugh.

“Do you think he’s torturing her?” Tony asks.

“Oh stop. Did you see the way he was covered in writing? They clearly bonded while we were done,” Nat points out.

“Oh they did more than bond.

Everyone looks at Sam, confused about his comment.

“When I came to get Y/N, I found her on top of Loki on the ground. She was laying on top of him and leaning over his face. It looked like they were about to make out or something.”

Bucky is fueled with rage at Sam’s description. Steve looks over to his friend to see Bucky’s hands in the tightest first he’s seen in a while. There is nothing but anger seeping through his eyes, jealous of the way Sam talks of the two. Bucky storms off towards the hallways before slamming his door closed. The team looks over to Steve worried, knowing Bucky has feelings for you.

Is Bucky okay?

“Yes, he is.” Loki’s heart drops. Even in your own pain and healing, you worry about Bucky. He forgot about your attachment to the solider due to his own growing feelings for you. “He’s alive and doing well, thanks to you. You’re a good person.”

It’s the right thing to do. I don’t like it when my friends die.

A little flutter of hope flickers in Loki’s mind when you refer to Busy as a friend. He knows that you have more of a relationship with Bucky than the others, but ‘friend’ gived him hope.

“Most people don’t like it when friends die, but I won’t lie dear, I’m surprised you consider him a friend.”

He knows what he’s doing by starting this conversation, but better to have his feelings squashed now then later when he’s ever more attached to you.

What do you mean?

“It just seems like you and him have a special bond.”

Like a dating bond?

“I suppose you could say that.”

No, we’re just friends. Besides, I like you.

Loki meets your eyes to see nothing but warmth and comfort. 

“I like you, too. You’re much more enjoyable than the others.”

-

The next day comes and you’ve gained more energy, enough to get out of bed. Feeling the cold floor on your feet for the first time sparks new joy and hope. You grab onto Loki’s arm, who hasn’t left the med bay since he brought you there. Slowly, the two of you shuffle out of the room and into the elevator. 

As the elevator opens us, the Avengers laying in the main room turn to see you weakly walking, clinging on to Loki as you move. He looks down at you with a proud smile across his face. Bucky watches from the kitchen with jealousy in his eyes. Steve gives him a warning look, not daring him to do anything. 

“Hey, Y/N,” Steve says sympathetically, “Are you feeling better?”

You nod with a smile which brings a smile to everyone’s face, except Bucky’s. When you spot him to your left, you notice the cold stoic face he gives you and the way he stares at Loki, his eyes burning holes at the writing on his fair skin.

“I’m taking her to my room so she can rest more,” Loki informs.

No one misses the way he says ‘my room’ and not ‘your room’ and they definitely don’t miss the way your hand slides from his biceps down his arm to tangle into his hand.

[loving-all-for-loki]

Voiceless Love Chapter 6: Downfall

Loki x reader, Bucky x reader

Word Count: 3452

Warnings: angst, lots and lots of angst, some Loki fluff, swearing

A/N: I’m sorry. I cried while writing this and had to take a break to gather myself. It’s a rough one

Tag List: @caffeineoverloadandstudying @zizzlekwum @buckylokisimp @daddysfavoritesexkitten @lokiyoulittle @magicalpieex

You spend three days in bed with Loki resting after the Bucky incident. Even though you’ve been able to get up, Loki refuses to let you do anything and forces you to lay all day with him serving you hand and foot. The team watches in disbelief as Loki makes you lunch, gets you your clothes, and even slipped your fingernails once. They find excuses to walk past Loki’s room to spy on you two, but they always catch Loki reading to you or you asleep.

“You can’t be really mad at him. He’s taking care of her,” Natasha states. “Yes, that may be the case, but what are his intentions? She’s not a super soldier or a government trained assassin. She can’t defend herself if Reindeer Games decides to pull any tricks,” Tony pipes in.

“Tony’s right,” Bucky says, “She’s not a superhero in the sense we are.”

“You boys are so paranoid. Obviously, they got closer while we were gone. Is that such a bad thing? Loki finding someone who calms him and makes him kinder?”

“Yes.”

Nat rolls her eyes at Tony and Bucky, sitting down on the lounge seats. 

“What are we discussing? I heard my brother's name.”

Thor enters the room which gains everyone’s attention. Steve and Sam put down their sandwiches and tune into the conversation.

“We’re discussing Loki’s intentions with Y/N.” Nat informs.

“Oh, it is very sweet isn’t it?”

“Not to Tony.”

“It’s like he’s grooming her!”

Everyone groans in disgust. 

“Tony, I think you fail to realize how hard it is for Loki to connect to people, especially Midgardians yourself.”

“I don’t. I know he’s an arrogant prick whose head is shoved up his ass.”

“Yes, he thinks highly of himself, but he’s capable of feelings beyond pride and rage.”

“Most people aren’t like you Tony,” Steve jokes, which earns him a hard look from the billionaire.

“But with Y/N? Someone who’s so defenseless and vulnerable?” Bucky adds in.

-

Loki comes in with a bowl of mac n’ cheese, setting it before you.

“I had to get Thor to help me. I’m very good with Midgard technology. I’m not even sure what a microwave really is.”

You chuckle inside at Loki’s innocence and start eating the macaroni before he joins you on the bed, his arm resting over your shoulders. You lean your head against his as the two of you watch some history documentary Loki was intrigues by. Since you’ve been in bed for three days, you’ve only been watching shows and movies you like so you gave Loki a chance. He felt bad then complained about poor Midgard entertainment, but as soon as you showed him the history channel, he changed his mind.

You take your pen beside you and grab Loki’s hand that’s gently rubbing your back. On the side of his index, you write thank you for everything.

“Oh course, little one. You need to be well rested.”

Do you think I could get my own water?

Loki looks beside him to see your glass empty and sighs.

“I suppose you can.”

You smile up at him before getting out of bed. It’s weird to feel the cold floors on your feet after spending so much time under thick warm blankets. You shuffle your way over to the other side of the bed and take the glass. Loki keeps an eye on you as you make your way around, ready to pounce at grab you if you fall over and pass out. You give him a smile and pat on the shoulder before making your way to the door.

Taking your time, you walk down the hallway and hear your name come up in conversation. You stop right before the entrance to the living room, your hands shaking as you grip the glass cup tightly.

“But with Y/N? Someone who’s so defenseless and vulnerable?”

“I know it seems what you would say sketchy, but Loki’s intentions are honorable.”

“And Buck, you’ve seen the way she is with you. She holds onto your metal arm. She’s not afraid of most things other people are,” Steve adds.

Listening to them discuss you like they know you is irritating. Bucky goes on to talk about how weak and fragile you are and the others don’t disagree. They add comments about Loki that infuriate you. ‘He’s dangerous’. ‘He’s using her’. ‘He’s tricking her’. It didn’t feel like manipulation when he made you tea last night. It didn’t feel like manipulation when he explained book plots you didn’t understand. Why did they see him for someone he isn’t? Why do they still hold New York against him as if it was completely him?

You get pulled out of your thoughts when you hear Bucky speak again.

“I don’t like that he went after someone so innocent and defenseless like her.”

You step into their sight as soon as the words leave Bucky’s mouth. Everyone turns to stare at you, realizing you heard them talking about you. Bucky’s eyes go wide at the hurt expression written across your face, realizing he had messed up.

“How much did you hear?” Steve asks.

You slowly and nervously shake your head in disgust. Bucky takes a step forward to come near you but you stumble over your feet as you back up, falling and landing on your wrists. Tears start forming in your eyes as you look back up at the team, specifically Bucky who looks likes he just ran over someone’s dog.

“Y/N, you know I didn’t mean-”

You shake your head and run back down the hallway, ignoring Bucky’s pleads and the Avengers trying to diffuse the situation. Your vision was so clouded by the tears that you miss Loki coming up behind you and run straight into him.

“Woah, woah,” he gasps, grabbing your forearm as you stumble, “what’s-”. He notices the tears slowly falling down your face. “What did they do?”

You shake your head and push past him, retreating into yout room and under your blankets. Loki storms straight to the Avengers instead of with you.

“Tell me what in the nine realms you did to make her cry?”

The team is stunned as Loki raises his voice. There’s fury raging in his eyes, popping his veins out in anger. 

“She overheard something. It’s fine.” Sam says.

“Then tell me why she looks like someone hit her dog?”

Bucky puffs up his chest and walks straight up to Loki in a threatening manner, but Loki doesn’t react even an inch.

“Why do you care, huh? Why are you so attached to her? I thought you hated humans! That’s why you attacked New York right? You wanted to take control of us ‘weak humans’, but you failed, so what gives you the right to take her?”

“Are you implying she is weak?”

Bucky stays silent and holds his stoic look. 

“You are. That’s what you were saying, wasn’t it? She heard you call her weak.”

Loki scoffs at the soldier and looks to the other avengers for a sign of confirmation. They don’t meet his eyes with trigger alarms in his brain.

“You are all despicable. You know nothing about her. She is not as vulnerable as you think she is.”

“That’s not the point, Reindeer Games,” Tony cuts in, “The point is what are your intentions with her? Why do you want her so bad?”

“What? You think I’m manipulating or messing with her in some way. Is it impossible to imagine me liking someone’s presence?”

“Honestly, yes. We do. We’ve seen you do it in New York. Why can’t you do it now?”

There’s a deafening silence looming over the room. Loki’s eyes go cold as he clenches his fist, trying to not knock Tony out on the spot. Bucky still stands in his face, searching for some kind of vulnerable moment, but all he sees is fury in Loki’s face. He realizes they may be wrong in this situation. No one gets angry like this over nothing. They have never seen him like this before, so much so that even Thor takes a step away from his seething brother. Like nothing happened, Loki swivels and rushes away down the hall, but passes his room and goes straight to yours to find you balling underneath your sheets.

His anger does not go away, but only lessens as he removes the barrier between you two. He sees you curled into yourself, crying as if you had to get rid of every ounce of water in your body. No human has ever seemed so in need comfort to him before than now. Picking you up, he adjusts in bed with you on his lap, gripping your hands tight to his neck, burying your face in his chest. Loki pats your head and shushes you, trying to calm you down while his own burdens flash through his mind.

“I am absolutely outraged by those people,” he says, “how dare they speak like that about you. Do not listen, little one. You are stronger than you know and they are not aware. They do not know you like I know you.”

You continue to sob into him but the tears slow down. Heavy gasping turns into staggered breathing as your heart races less.

“I cannot fathom their incompetence. Pathetic Midgardians. I don’t think they’ll ever forgive me for my advances.”

“I forgive you.”

Loki snaps his head to look down at you, who is staring up at him, face flushed with tears. You had spoken.

Your voice. It’s unlike anything he’s ever heard and he only heard three words. Three so very important words he never thought he’d hear anyone say and you said it with such meaning. Such kindness and heart. It sounded like the heavens themselves opened up and relinquished its glory to him. He felt his body get a rush of warmth flowing through him, one that reminded him of being home with Frigga.

“Thank you,” he says, “I fear you may be the only one.”

He’s scared to say anything about you speaking and freak you out. If he has to go another lifetime without hearing your voice again, he’d never forgive himself.

“I’m tired,” you say sheepishly.

“Then go to bed, darling. I’ll still be here when you wake.”

-

You wake the next day to the sounds of crashing. Manly voices you have never heard before boom. Springing awake, you forget about Loki falling asleep next to you and accidentally elbow him in the face. “What the-”

“Loki, I’m sorry! I forgot-”

“It’s okay, little one. Accidents happen,” he groans.

The two of you get up off the bed for you to change. With a flick of the neck, Loki uses his magic to change into a three piece suit as he usually wears. You come out with a deep green overalls that makes him smile.

“I like it when you wear my colors.”

“I’ll keep that in mind.”

Hearing your voice in the morning reminds him why he’s around. You’re so perfect in so many ways and that angelic noise only proves that more and more. The sounds of a male booming voice brings him out of his paradise. Taking your hand, the two of you enter the main room where the other Avengers are gathered with a man you’ve never seen before talking to Thor.

“Heimdall,” Loki announces, “what are you doing here?”

The man turns to see Loki standing next to you and doesn’t miss the interlocking of your hands. He turns to Thor who gives a weak smile and whispers something for only him to hear before looking back to you and the god.

“I am here to take you back to Asgard.”

“Father has requested you to come home and get punished for your actions on New York since you have been spending time here. He wants to take proper precautions on behalf of Asgard,” Thor adds.

“That’s ridiculous. He can’t beg for me now.”

“He can, brother, as I am afraid.”

You take Loki’s collar and bring his ear closer to you.

“Does that mean I won’t get to see you?”

“Don’t worry, darling. I won’t let them take me.”

Steve looks between Bucky and Tony who are staring wide eyed at your interaction with the god. Even Clint and Nat stare in awe as you have a private conversation, clearly speaking to Loki.

“What is happening?” Heimdall asks.

“She’s never spoken before,” Thor whispers.

“And she’s speaking to Loki? Why him?”

“I’ve said ‘I’m afraid’ many times and I’m going to say it again. I’m afraid they’ve bonded greatly. This will be an issue if All-Father intends to keep Loki in prison on Asgard.”

“Wonderful.”

Loki walks away from you and takes Thor’s arm, pulling him away to the side.

“Do you really expect me to fall for this?”

“For what?”

“Father wants me home. I know all he wants is to throw me in some cage for eternity. I’m not going no matter how much you plead or even if Father wants to come down here himself and drag me through the Bifrost.””

“There’s nothing I can do. Heimdall had strict orders.”

You walk over to Bucky who puts a protective arm around you, trying to ignore the pain of being second to comfort. He kisses the top of your forehead which you smile for. A glimmer of hope rests in Bucky’s heart that you still have feelings for him despite spending all your time with Loki. You hold to him tight, hugging him around his waist, in anxiousness. You can’t imagine if Loki is gone, the one person you trust the most, you haven't hurt before.

“I can’t leave Y/N,” Loki whispers, “I don’t think you understand that.”

“Brother, I understand your connection to her, but I-”

“Don’t say you have no choice. You can go back to Father and tell him that I’m not coming.”

“You know I can’t do that.”

“Yes, you can.”

“No, I can’t.”

“Yes, you can.”

“No, I can’t.”

“Yes, you can.”

“There’s no point in arguing about this, Loki. You have to go home.”

“What will happen to her, then? She’ll be stuck here with people who treat her like a child.”

“She’ll be fine. She’s a big girl.”

“Not to them. To them she’s weak and useless. She’ll never be used for her powers properly. She’ll never be treated as an equal.”

“I’ll make sure that she does.”

“Brother, I’m the god of lies. I can see straight through you. You’re not going to do anything but sit by and watch them.”

“I’ll watch out for her.”

Loki’s chest rises as he takes in a deep breath, knowing his brother won’t do anything. He contemplates his options: either go with Heimdall or stay here and face worse punishment when he sees his Father one day.

“How long will I be gone for?”

“My hope is a month or two, but most likely two or three years.”

“I can’t leave her that long.”

“Then I will fight for your freedom or escape every day.”

Loki takes a look at you hugging Bucky. The exact image in front of his is what he fear most: losing you to the soldier who looks at you the same way he does. He knows he has no choice if he wants to face a lesser punishment.

“Fine. Give me a moment to say goodbye.”

“Of course.”

Loki walks to you who lets go of Bucky and hugs him. He wraps an arm around your waist and walks with you over to the entrance of the hall where no one can hear you.

“I have to go, darling.”

“Please, don’t.”

The team watches as you open your mouth and speak to Loki, proving to them there was a situation at hand with your attachment to Loki.

“Oh no,” Tony mumbles.

“We’re in trouble,” Nat agreed.

Bucky tries to drown out the anger and instead, a wave of depression over comes him. He knows he messed up with you, but seeing how quick you moved to the god makes him sad, knowing he could have had that with you had he not gotten hurt or even gone on that mission.

“I have no choice, Y/N, but I promise whatever happens, I will come back.”

“What do you mean ‘whatever happens’?” 

“There is a good chance I’m being locked away for some time. Thor said that if that is the case, he will help me get out and return to you.”

“You promise you’ll come back?”

“There is not a soul in the nine realms that can stop me from coming to you, because you are my home and you can’t rip my heart away from you.”

Silver tongue. You knew they called him that for a reason.

“I promise, my darling.” 

“I’m scared if you don’t come back.”

“I know. I am too. I fear that I’ll never forget you and spend the rest of my days in a cell longing for your touch.”

“Please, don't’ say that.”

“I’m sorry,” he chuckles, “I take it back. I’ll see you in good time.”

Loki gives you a tight hug, burying his face in the crook of your neck. You start crying on his shoulder, leaving dark spots on his suit. Before walking to Thor, Loki lifts your chin up with his hand, connecting his lips to yours. 

You taste like strawberries and wine. Loki thinks to himself that he could get drunk on your lips all the time, always thirsting for you. You’re so soft, like floating on a cloud. He thought your voice was the closest thing to nirvana, but he was wrong. He is just the same. He tastes like whiskey and is sensual with his touch. You can feel the butterflies in your stomach flying around, fluttering their wings and bumping into the insides of you. A chill runs down your spine as the two of you hold each other. You never want to stop kissing him.

Thor coughs under his breath, distracting you and Loki, breaking your kiss. Loki turns to his brother with sadness in his eyes that every person sees. The Avengers look at one another, seeing how painful this is for him, but they don’t dare to look at you. Tears roll down your face, flushing you over. They’ve never seen anyone look so desperate for help. It breaks them, but they don’t dare go against Odin’s word.

Loki walks over to Heimdall who places a hand on his shoulder. He turns back to face you across the room.

“Goodbye, my love.”

In a flash, the two are gone, leaving you a blubbering mess in front of the heroes. Bucky takes a step forward to console you, but you fall backwards shaking your head.

“I’m sorry, Y/N, but Loki needs to take responsibility. He’s a criminal.”

“No!” You scream.

Everyone is taken back by the anger and desperation in your voice. Nat and Sam share a look, in awe of your vocal power. Bucky goes wide eyed, staring at you whose eyebrows are furrowed and mouth wide open. You’re choking on your own breath as you hyperventilate. No one dares to say anything as they urge you to break the silence, not wanting to miss a single thing you say.

“You don’t get to say shit!” You yell. “You don’t know him! You don’t get to say ‘he’s a criminal’! He’s a good man and you all are disappointing children! You’re children! Only mature people don’t try to hurt those who hurt them! They understand and listen and make them better! You’re only out to destroy! You’re not heroes fighting for vengeance! You’re villains wanting revenge! You disgust me! The way you treat him and me, so don’t say anything about Loki! People say things happen for a reason, so when I punch you in the face for ever saying anything bad about him ever again, remember I had a reason!”

You turn to walk away from the paralyzed group. They try to take in everything you said, shocked by your first words to them being rage over Loki. There’s no words they have left in them as you’ve taken all of them, except for Bucky. He stand there, heart shattering in a million pieces from watching you pour your heart out for a man who did his people wrong, for a man who is a war dictator. 

“Why do you care so much about him?” He screams at you.

You stop in your tracks, facing them with your face full of pain and sorrow.

“Because I love him.

[loving-all-for-loki]

Voiceless Love Chapter 9: Reunited

Loki’s Route

Loki x reader

Word count: 2154

Warnings: fluff, smut (keep it wrapped, boys and girls), more fluff, 

Tag List: @the-mean-pansexual @daddysfavoritesexkitten @zizzlekwum @caffeineoverloadandstudying @lokiyoulittle @magicalpieex @buckylokisimp

A/N: Hey everyone, I’m really sorry for how late this post is, but my family all got covid and I've been having a hard time with my depression so it took a lot out of me to write this especially since it’s a happy fluff piece and I feel like crap. The next chapter will be better, I promise.

Loki steps into the hallway, looking around and seeing no one. For the god of lies and mischief, he can’t tell if someone is playing a trick on him. He checks every corner of the castle and no one is chasing him down. Quickly, Loki rushes to his old room and changes into his everyday clothes. He looks at himself in the mirror, seeing how disheveled he looks in his clothes. Using his magic, Loki cleans himself up to look more presentable.

Nothing new has happened in the last four months. The castle looks the same, the same attendants are walking around. No one is batting an eye at him walking freely in the hallways. It’s as if Loki never left or was never imprisoned. Nothing distracts him, though. There is only one thing on his mind.

He walks straight to the Bifrost without stopping. Heimdall gives him a shocked look, but shakes it off when Loki asks to go to Earth. There’s no surprise to his request. Heimdall opens the bifrost and he is sure enough on Earth. Loki stands at the end of the hangar, looking into the glass windows on the tower. There’s no sight of you, but Steve and Nat are perched on the couch. 

Steve looks over during mid sentence as sees Loki. He’s not sure at first if he’s real or some weird trick being played, but as soon as he sees Loki bow his head, there’s no doubt. Nat quickly turns around once realizing Steve is no longer paying attention to her words. She sees Loki too and stands up, heading straight for your door. She opens it to see you and Bucky reading together, his arm around your waist, and knows this news is going to kill him.

“Y/N,” she gently speaks.

You look up from your book at Nat whose eyes are hard to decipher. There’s a little fear, yet excitement. Hope. Sorrow. You’re not sure what to make out of it and neither does Bucky. He doesn’t know if he should be worried or not. Nat wouldn’t even look at him.

“There’s someone here you need to see.”

You and the soldier get up immediately and follow Nat to the living space. Steve is standing as well as Tony, Thor, Clint, and Sam who are walking in. Looking around, everyone is staring at you with big smiles. You’re not sure what is going on until something shiny catches your eye off in the distance. 

Loki gives you a large warm smile as you see him. He watches your face light up, grabbing onto Bucky’s sleeve and pulling. You sprint down the bridge and jump into Loki who has his arms open wide. He chuckles as he falls backwards, swinging you around from the waist. You laugh so hard as he sets you down and holds your head in his hands. Wrapping your arms around his neck, you two stand there for a couple of minutes just staring at one another with big grins on your face until Loki moves in close to kiss you. 

Like a man finding water after crawling through the desert, you feel rejuvenated. His lips on yours was a feeling you were too deprived of. His sweetness. The softness. The tenderness. The way he wraps his arms around your waist and pulls you into his body. It all feels perfect and right and whole again.

The team all staring at you two holding each other and smiling. Thor has never seen his brother so happy before, looking at you like nothing else matters. Loki’s eyes light up when they see you and there’s nothing in his brain but you. He has seen Loki with the other asgardian girls when he was coming of age, noticing them more and vice versa. He would entertain their flirting and often flirt back, but he was never interested. As soon as the girls would move on, he’d be back to his normal self: reading with a pissed off expression on his face.

But when he looks at you, nothing else matters. Holding you in his arms is the thing he’s been longing for. Loki kisses you again, holding your jaw and lifting you to him.

“Oh, how I have missed this,” he coos.

“I missed you more.”

“I don’t think that’s possible,” he laughs.

He holds you tight again before taking your hand in his. He walks down the hangar to the door where everyone is smiling. There’s no doubt Bucky is dying inside, watching you with Loki once again, leaving him. Yet, there is a large smile across his face without any pain being hidden inside. He can’t lie to himself that as much it hurts to see you with Loki again, you were happy with him, truly happy. There was a point he knew that no matter how hard he tried, your heart would always be with Loki.

“How are you?” Steve whispers.

“Fine,” he states.

“Is this going to be rough? Having Loki back?”

“It will, but I know they belong together. I’ll accept it someday.”

Steve nods looking at Bucky. There is no pain behind his eyes, no sorrow behind his smile. He looks back at you and Loki who are hanging on each other’s arms like a lost puppy and a kind human.

“I do need to borrow Y/N for a moment, so please excuse us as we catch up,” Loki pardons.

He pulls your hand in the direction of his room and everyone rolls their eyes, fully well knowing what’s going to happen. As soon as the door shuts behind you, Loki pins you against the door and starts attacking your mouth with his. You giggle at how he grabs your waist and pulls you close to him, as if you can’t be any closer. He places his hands on your ass and hoists you up, wrapping your legs around him. 

You hear him turn around before he breaks the kiss and throws you on the bed. You giggle as you bounce a little, laying in the untouched bed. Loki smiles above you as he snaps his fingers and makes both of your clothes disappear. You cover yourself, shocked by the sudden nudity. He climbs over you, taking in the sight of your body as he does, and kisses you again, but this time it’s slow and passionate.

“Oh, how I’ve waited for this.”

He captures your lips again.

“Oh, how I’ve missed you.”

Loki leans down and leaves pecks on your neck, going downwards to between your breasts. You let out an airy moan as he lightly bites on your supple skin. Then, you feel a deeper clench as he sucks above your nipple, leaving a deep purple hickey. He looks down at his work and smiles proudly.

“I’ve waited so long to make you mine, little one. Now, I’m never letting you go.”

“I’ll never leave.”

He groans at your words before kissing you again and humping into you. Loki takes your hand in his and places it on his hard erection. You keep kissing as you slowly move your hand up and down his shaft. He lets go a moan in your mouth, making you buckle your hips up from the arousal and vibrations. Loki leans back and chuckles at your plea, taking his cock and lining it up between your folds.

“You ready, darling?”

You nod your head enthusiastically. Loki slowly enters you, letting you adjust to his size and he sinks in. You’ve had your share of boyfriends and a one night stand here and there, but nothing compares to his size. He is a god after all. There’s a slight pain as he enters, stretching you around his length. He stops every so often and lets you adjust before going balls deep. You reach out and holds his bicep to keep you centered. Breathing heavily, you give him the go to start moving. There’s nothing rough about Loki. He doesn’t pull out and slam back into you, but he moves at a slow agonizing pace.

“I want to make love to you, little one. I want to cherish this.”

He leans down and wraps his arms around you, slowly thrusting in. You wrap your arms around his neck as he leans in for a passionate kiss. It’s slow and sweet. He nips on your lower lip a little, making you giggle. He smiles at the sound of you, enjoying him and his body. He’s quite proud of himself and the way he can make you come undone around him.

After a little bit, you feel the orgasm making its way through you. It’s breathtaking as you cum all over his cock. You feel as if you’re floating on a cloud in heaven. As you lean into him, Loki attaches himself to one of your nipples, slightly biting and sucking on it. The sensation of his tongue against you adds to the orgasm, making it sweeter and more intimate.

Loki staggers in his speed and goes a little faster. You can tell he’s close at the way he staggers and is inconsistent. He lets out a loud deep groan as he cums inside of you. His fingers dig into your skin deeper, leaving marks on your lower back. He falls on top of you panting and holding you closer. You take in a deep breath and wrap your arms around him before he leans up and looks at you.

His hair is plastered to his face from his sweat. He smiles down with the sweetest grin you have ever seen. Pushing a piece of your hair to the side, he leans down and kisses you deeply, not letting go of his hold on you.

“I have waited so long for that.”

“So have I.”

-

You wake up the next morning with an ache and sticky feeling between your thighs. A second  passes as you wonder what happened, but you feel something rustle behind you. Loki grabs onto you, pulling you closer to him, and nuzzling his nose in your neck. His body next to yours reminds you it wasn’t a dream. He is actually there with you. You lean in closer to his touch.

“Goodmorning,” you whisper.

You can’t make out what he says, but Loki mumbles into your neck, making you giggle. Your turn around to face him and he gives you an unhappy look.

“What’s that face for?” you laugh.

“You keep moving.”

“Sorry, I wanted to see you. It’s been too long so I’m taking advantage.”

He gives you a weak smile, “Oh darling, you don’t have to explain. After all, you weren’t the one in prison.”

“I felt like I was.”

Loki tucks a strand of your haid behind your ear as he gazes into your eyes.

“You really are beautiful.”

There’s a moment where you two stare into each other's eyes lovingly. He holds your jaw in his hand, stroking your cheek with his thumb. You’ve never thought about it before, but you just now notice how blue his eyes are. They’re piercing like the sky on a warm summer’s day. Loki smiles at the way you lose yourself in thought.

“What is going through your little head?”

“Your eyes.”

He chuckles before adjusting himself so he is closer to you, “Is that all?”

“Yeah.”

“Well, little one, have I ever told you about my species?”

“Like… being asgardian?”

“No, I was adopted, actually. I am originally from Jotunheim, or Utgard. I don’t remember it, being that I was a baby when it was destroyed, but I heard it was beautiful. Well, Jotunheim was home to the giant gods, which is what I am. My father enchanted me, if you will, to look like other Asgardians so no one would know I was adopted. He and Frigga passed me as one of their own for a long time, until I found out. Well, my eyes are not the blue-est part of me. My skin is actually the most blue part of me.”

“Can you show me?” Loki looks around for a moment to make sure no one is peeking at them through the door. He closes his eyes and focuses really hard. All of a sudden, his skin starts turning into an icy pale blue, brighter than anything you’ve seen. When he opens his eyes, they no longer look as striking as they did.

You run your fingers along his skin which is significantly colder than it was moments ago, shocking you a little. Loki’s eyes wander your face for any sign of fear or hesitance, but all he sees is loving wonder. How could anyone love him when he looks like a freak? A monster? Different from everyone else and the girl who is scared to speak to people loves him. 

“Normally people run out… screaming, but you-”

“I thought I’ve proved myself different,” you say.

“You have. You’ve proved yourself very different… and I love that.”

[loving-all-for-loki]

Voiceless Love Chapter 8: Sweet Release

(Loki’s Route)

Loki x reader

Word count: 2712

Warnings: angst, swearing, fluff

Tag List: @caffeineoverloadandstudying @zizzlekwum @daddysfavoritesexkitten @buckylokisimp @lokiyoulittle @magicalpieex

A/N: So there is not a lot of reader in this chapter for some good reason. We're gonna focus on Loki for this and then the next chapter, the reader will be back more later. Also, for those picking this route over Bucky’s, this one will be a bit longer and more detailed. Much love!

Loki wakes up in his dungeon cell to the sound of metal sliding against metal. His food tray sits in front of the door as the sound of somebody walking away disappears. He crawls over to the food to devour it. Although he may be home, he doesn’t feel like it. The food is disgusting and there’s no sight of the lovely Asgard anywhere. Nothing feels the same.

Nothing has felt the same since he got back. You weren’t there to talk about books with him, play chess, or cuddle. He didn’t have your warm body to hold at night to keep him from being cold. Your voice didn’t wake him up every morning and your hands don’t brush his hair anymore. He finds himself dirty and matted, no one taking care of him or even caring to help him take care of himself. The pile of dirt in the corner of his cell is his only friend/company.

Loki has lost track of time, not sure whether it’s been months or weeks since he’s been gone. From Thor’s words, he knows you’re handling his absence as well as he’s handling yours. You’ve been hiding in your room the whole time, refusing to leave or talk to anyone else. He’s glad they’re trying to talk to you, but he’s nervous about what. He knows they don’t like him, they disapprove of their relationship and are probably telling her out of loving him. Ignoring the terrible thoughts, he’s distracted by the door opening.

Thor stands in front of the doorway in his suit. He looks down at his brother. Loki looks frail, tired, weak. His hair is a mess and his clothes couldn’t be more dirty. There are bags underneath his eyes that are bloodshot from crying. His skin is pale, but his blue shows through.

“Brother, you look-”

“Disgusting? Wretched? Thank you.”

“I was going to say handsome, but those words are more accurate. How are you?”

“Take a look at me and ask that again.”

“Right, well, I’m working hard on getting you out of here.”

“Oh, are you? How is that going?” “Well, it’s taking some time. Father says you still have a couple of months in here still.”

“How long have I been here?”

“Three months?”

Loki rolls his eyes, shaking his head and looking away. Three months. Three months since he’s seen you, held you, kissed you.

“How is she?” he asks.

“Y/N?”

“Of course, you idiot.”

“She’s doing well.”

“Is she?” “Do you want the honest truth?”

Loki looks at Thor in the eyes. He can see pain and pity. Something is wrong with you and he doesn’t think Loki can take it. He wants to protect him.

“Yes.”

“She’s not doing well. She stayed in her room for the whole time. She hardly eats, hardly sleeps. No one’s heard from her. Bucky tries to speak to her, but she ignores him a lot, until just recently. He took her to the hospital to get looked over. She’s weak. She’s tired.”

Loki's eyes swell up with tears when hearing about you. You miss him as much as he misses you and are taking it the same way. She’s stroking herself. There’s little anger stirring in him at the sound of Bucy talking to you. He’s sure he’s taking care of her, getting closer. His jealousy gets the better of him as he punches the wall behind him.

“Why him? Why out of anyone who could help her, it has to be him?”

“We all know his alliance to her, brother.”

“Yes, but you could be that one and when he goes, you tell him you have it under control.”

“Are you really yelling at me for not helping her when I’m helping you? I’m trying to get your freedom!”

“That’s not going so well, is it!” Loki yells back.

The tension is thick between the brothers, they’re eyes not unlocking. Loki looks furious at Thor who’s standing with his chest out and teeth gritting.

“If you weren’t so frail right now, I would want to strangle you.”

“Oh, please do. End the misery I’m in. You’d be doing me a favor.”

Thor knows those words are too true. He knows his brother and when he misses something, he misses it. It’s like a drug and he’s going through withdrawal. Attention. Power. The tesseract. Now you. It takes over everything in him and he can’t think of anything else.

“Brother, I promise you I will get you out of here. No matter what it takes. Not just for you, but also Y/N.”

“Even if it involves going against Father and being banished from Asgard until he dies?”

“Yes.”

Loki knows his brother’s alliance and loyalty to their father, and he knows his words are false. There’s no way he’d go against Odin’s power especially with the whole army of Asgard behind the All-Father.

“Is there anything I can get you?”

“Honestly, a bucket of water and soap? I feel disgusting.”

Thor drops his head and chuckles, pointing at Loki. “I’ve always loved your humor.”

Thor leaves the cell and shuts the door. Loki is left once again in his own darkness and mind.

“That wasn’t a joke.” he mutters.

-

Thor wanders the hall of the castle. Asgardian women pass by, giggling and whispering to themselves as they walk by Thor. He watches them as he walks past before redirecting himself back to the plan. He walks straight to the throne room where Odin is sitting and talking to his advisors.

“Ah, hello, son,” Odin welcomes, “What did I do to have your presence?”

“Lock Loki up. When will he be set free?” “Well, I haven’t really thought about that. Maybe in two years time, I haven’t decided.”

“You haven’t decided? Your own son sits and rots in that cell, being punished for something he didn’t do on this planet, and you haven’t decided his sentence length?”

“Do not criticize me, son. I will decide when it’s time. He’s hardly served what is fair, yet, so it is far from my mind. I have a whole kingdom to rule over. You’ll understand one day when you take the throne.”

“Yes, I will understand. And I will understand when someone is locked away for years, rotting away when he doesn’t need to be. He was getting punished by Midgard. Why take him away?”

“Loki thinks they are lowly. He won’t learn a lesson being ‘punished’ by someone lower than him. He need to be taught by someone in authority, someone he respects.”

“You’re a fool if you think he respects you.”

“Do you forget who you are talking to?” Odin yells, standing up.

“No, I know exactly who I am talking to. The King who doesn’t have enough time or care to worry over his son who is dying in a cell.”

“If he is dying, we’d know. He’d be creating chaos for attention.”

“So doesn’t it worry you that he’s not doing anything?”

There’s thick silence in the room, hanging off of Thor’s words. Odin had never considered how odd it is for the god of mischief to be so quiet while angry and contained. It wasn’t easy getting him in there even though Heimdall had brought him with ease. Loki had fought to not been put it in that cage and now that he is, he’s oddly quiet.

“Thor, I know how you care deeply for your brother, but there are things you won’t understand,” Odin says, ignoring the worrying words that linger in the air.

“Father, I am sure you are right, but Loki is not a negotiable term.”

“You are right. He is not, which is why you coming to be about him seems irrelevant. Nothing you say will change my thoughts as of this moment on.”

“Please, I beg of you to reconsider yourself and think about it for-”

“Are you daring to question my decisions? I am not to be-”

“I dare to question it all when it comes to Loki’s freedom.”

There’s a crack of thunder heard from the distance. Odin’s eyes snap up to meet his sons, seeing them glow blue under the light. The rage builds inside of the god as he stands there, chest out and fists clenched.

“I’ve never seen you so worked up over Loki before. There is more to this, isn’t there?” “It’s incredible to see you finally stop thinking about yourself for once.”

“Why is it so important to you?” “Because I am not seeking Loki’s freedom just for myself or him. There is someone on Midgard in need of his presence.”

“Are you telling me there’s a Midgardian actually wanting him back?”

“You may be the All-Father, but you are not the All-Knowing, Father. There is a human who desires Loki in ways no one else would understand.”

“A Midgardian in love with Loki. Quite interesting.”

“It is, indeed, and I promised her I would not stop fighting for Loki’s release. I will do this for her.”

“She made quite the impression, then? And how does Loki feel about this inferior being?”

“Loki would argue with you on the ‘inferior’ part of your description.”

Odin slowly sits back down on his throne, leaning his chin on his hand in contemplation. He scans Thor’s face for any sign of lies, but he sees none. He knows his son. Loki can hide a million lies, but Thor is easily persuaded and weak. There is not much Thor can hide, yet there is nothing to hide. Odin knows what Thor says is true.

“What do I have to gain by releasing him free? He will not learn his lesson. He’ll lack the power and attention and create chaos once again.”

“You have never seen Loki with this moral. She contains him, controls him,” Thor informs, “She’s the calm to his storm.”

His words ring throughout the throne room. Some of the officials have stopped what they are doing to listen to the two royals bicker and Thor’s description of the girl has piqued all of their interest. They murmur to one another, discussing the topic at hand. A girl who really has control over Loki? It seems impossible. They all remember him growing up, running around and causing havoc. The only woman who ever kept him in check was Frigga. Another woman, a mortal even, being able to have the same power is extraordinarily rare.

“Somehow I believe you,” Odin admits.

“Then let him go and come with me. You can meet her for yourself. She’s truly a rare creature if I say so myself.”

“I might consider that, Thor, but if I were to let him go and your words not be true, there’s no telling what he could do. He could stab me in the back and attempt to take over another world.”

“Fine, then come now. See her for yourself.”

-

There’s a large flash of light that comes down on the hangar. Nat watches as Thor and Odin appear, dressing in formal Asgardian clothing. They walk down the bridge towards the doors as Nat whistles for Steve or Tony. Steve and Bucky walk in to see the gods strutting down.

“What’s happening here?” Steve asks.

“I thought you could answer that,” Nat replies.

“Everybody, this is my father, Odin.”

Their eyes go wide at Thor’s smile. Dropping to their knees, they show Odin respect who chuckles with joy.

“I never knew Midgardians were so compliant. No wonder Loki came here.”

“Father, please try not to anger anyone. No promises that I will protect you. I am here to introduce him to Y/N. I suppose she is around?”

“I’ll go get her.”

As soon as the words leave Bucky’s mouth, Steve gets up to protest but the soldier is already down the hallway. He returns a few moments later with you, wrapped in your blankets. Bucky lightly pushes you towards Thor who stretches out his hand. You take his hand and look over to him with curiosity in your eyes.

“Father,” Thor says, backing up to show Odin to your eyesight, “this is Y/n, who Loki fell in love with.”

Odin looks over you, stunned by your appearance. Although you look better than you have in the last few weeks, you’re still a little scrawny. You don’t stand with power or confidence, but instead with your head low and eyes lower. You lack the flame, the boldness, the theatrical attributes Loki has. Nothing about you makes sense to him.

“You’re the one I’ve heard so much about?”

You nod your head which stirs Odin.

“Will you not answer my-”

“Oh, Father, I failed to mention something important. She is mute. She does not speak to anyone, except for Loki.”

Thor gives his father a shit eating grin, proving another point of Loki’s importance. Odin takes a step back in shock.

“Nobody?”

“Nobody, but Loki.”

Odin looks back over to you who nods your head in agreement, “How unremarkable. Loki falling for a mortal and one who doesn’t speak at that.”

“Like I said, a rare creature.”

“So, tell me, or don’t… do you love Loki?’

You nod your head at Odin’s question and it looks as if he doesn’t understand your answer or as if he doesn’t believe you. Although he has one eye, you can see the confusion on his face. He opens his mouth to speak, but it quivers with no sound coming out. His eyes wander down to see a small gold necklace laying on your chest.

“What is that?”

You hold it up for him to see. The metal resembles a snake, one coiled up and hissing.

“Did Loki get you that?”

You nod enthusiastically, fiddling with it between your fingers. Steve walks up behind you and places a hand on your shoulder.

“Loki has given her a few gifts actually. Flowers, jewelry, name it.”

“And you, whoever you are, have you seen the way Loki is with her?”

“We all have,” Steve admits, “he’s gentle, patient. He’s never made her uncomfortable. She’s his first priority when he wakes and his last thought before he lays himself to bed.”

“Son, it seems your words ring true. I may consider freeing Loki, but I need time.”

“Father, in all due respect time-”

“You’ve challenged me enough today. Y/N, it was a pleasure meeting you and I have learned a lot about Loki, even in our short time meeting. Thor, let’s go back to Asgard. There's a son I’d like a word with.”

-

The door to the cell opens and Loki’s head springs up. Expecting to see Thor, he’s shocked when Odin comes through looking solemn.

“Father, I-”

Odin holds up his finger, silencing Loki. He paces back and forth in the room.

“I know a lot of things. Nobody doubts that,” he rambles, “but for my son to fall in love with a silent mortal girl is not one. She’s sweet. I like her.”

Loki cocks his head to the side, mouth slightly open in confusion.

“Yes, I met her. Tiny thing, but cute. I see why you like her. Thor likes her, too. He’s been arguing with me all day about letting you go and on behalf of her. I can’t say I’m not surprised. It took me a moment to truly believe him when he said you fell in love with a Midgardian. Once he took me down there to meet her, everything made sense. So, I have a proposition for you. You never return here and live the rest of your life on Midgard with her or I keep you here.” “What’s the catch?” Loki whines.

“There is none. Take my generosity before I change my mind. Doesn’t happen often.”

Odin walks out of the cell, but leaves the door open. Loki doesn’t stand up right away, not sure if he’s playing a trick on him or not. He looks around every corner and crevice, checking to see if there is anyone hiding to tackle him for stepping out. Loki stretches his body, bones cracking and popping into placement. He can feel the energy returning to his body as he takes a step out of his cage and towards the main halls of the castle.

[loving-all-for-loki]

Voiceless Love Chapter 4: Little One

Loki x reader, Bucky x reader

Word count: 2061

Warnings: fluff, talk of family loss, depression (alludes to suicidal thoughts), mention of a boner, angst

Tag List: @caffeineoverloadandstudying @zizzlekwum @lokiyoulittle @magicalpieex @daddysfavoritesexkitten @buckylokisimp

A/N: Okay Loki lovers, this is a dozy. We’re gonna delve more into Y/N and Loki’s relationship and look at her background a little. There’s a little spice at the end then it ends with some angst so I’m sorry. Trigger warning, there is depression mentioned and there are a few sentences that could be taken as suicidal tendencies or attempts so a little warning there. 

You find yourself sitting at the kitchen island one day and  eating your cereal still contemplating how you got to bed the night before. Bits and pieces from the night before come back. You remember making Loki a sandwich and him reading a book to you, but after that everything goes blank. Loki comes into the kitchen and smiles as he sits next to you.

“Hello, little one.”

You smile up at him, looking at his shiny beautiful green eyes.

“Did you sleep well?”

You take out your pen and write yes on his forearm. He chuckles at the way you always have that pen on you.

“You really carry that around everywhere?”

Yes, I’m not scared of communicating, just talking

Loki nods his head in understandment, “can I ask why you don’t speak?”

You contemplate answering for a moment, not knowing whether you should answer that question or not. 

“I’m sorry I shouldn't-”

You grab his arm and start writing all the way up to his bicep.

I’ve lost a lot of people in my life by twisting my words and changing them, so I figured if I were to write everything or make solid proof of my words, no one could change them.

Loki reads what you wrote then stares at you with a melancholy look. You hate being pitied, especially when you know the person is stuck up or prideful. Loki seems like one of those people who carries themselves on a higher pedestal than the rest. The looks he gives you makes you comfortable, urging you to repress into a small ball and close yourself off to him.

“I’m sorry,” he says. Loki reaches his hand out to cover yours in comfort, but it only heightens your anxiety. You move your hand and lean away from him, which makes Loki feel bad. He doesn’t know how to act with you, one second you’re very sweet then you avoid him like the plague. That’s why he started to leave the room when you entered, he thought you’d hate him.

Don’t worry about it

You finish your bowl of cereal and set it in the sink before getting up and leaving. Loki follows you up to the library where you start reading a book and he continues his own. He keeps staring at you, this lonely girl who has more pain than he realized.

“Why are you here?”

You look up and over to him on his chair. His eyebrows are furrowed in confusion, waiting to know everything about you, including why he is so drawn to you. Getting up and setting your book down (with slight annoyance), you sit back down near him like the first time you two interacted. He reaches his arm out to you to use.

I’m an avenger.

“Well, clearly, but how?”

About two years ago, my parents and I got in a bad car accident. They both passed away and I survived, horribly injured and stuck in a hospital. I was in a horrible state to the point where I should have been dead, but somehow I was alive. That’s when we found out it was a targeted hit and why I wasn’t killed. My parents were the targets. S.H.I.E.L.D agents came to me and told me that they were involved and going to help me. A day or two later, a scientist came and talked to me about healing options and there was a “potion” of some sort they had been working on to completely heal any wounds. They said the risk of me dying from taking it was about 50/50 and I didn’t have much to live for. Without my parents, I was lost and depressed, so I agreed to take whatever liquid they had. It healed me, but it had side effects. I would trip and scuff up my leg, but I’d find the bruises and legs to completely go away in seconds. Turns out it had lingered somewhere in my bloodstream and not my injuries that it flowed through me, healing any wound. Then throughout time, I found out it gave me the power to heal others as well.

You run out of room on Loki’s forearm and switch over to his right side, making him chuckle.

It started with me accidently touching my friends' cuts and them completely healing. After SHIELD came by my house one day to check on me, I told them what had been going on and they took me to some lab or theirs. I was tested on for a little bit and they decided I would be a good asset to them as a healer for missions. Not having a plan for my life, I agreed to join and come help. 

“You have no fighting background or any defense?”

Not at all. I’m just a personal nurse/antidote.

“What about your parents? Did they ever find out what happened?”

Hydra attack. Apparently, my parents were SHIELD agents back in the day and worked on a post-Captain America frozen case and Hydra wanted to cover up and hide Bucky. My parents found out about him.

“Your parents found out Bucky was alive a year before the Avengers did?”

Yes. 

Loki nods his head, wrapping his brain around everything you just told him. No wonder you were so close with Bucky. You probably relate to him with how bad Hydra ruined your life. 

“Does Bucky know about this?”

No. No one does except for you and Fury. He was told everything of course, but in my file he only put my powers and selective mute in ‘important information’. He knows how private I can be about things so he didn’t want to inform everyone on it if I didn’t want them to know.

“Why are you telling me this?”

Because I trust you

“No one trusts me.”

I do.

“Why?”

Because I know who you are. I know what happened with New York and it’s not your fault. I know what it feels like to be at the lowest point and want to do anything to feel something or get attention. I know you’re not a bad man, just a hurt one.

“I underestimated you, little one.”

You smile at each other, knowing you have a deeper bond than before. Loki chuckles at your shy little face, now knowing how much strength and depth you carry. You are much more than just a healer girl.

“I’m sorry about your parents.”

It’s okay. I’ve gotten over it.

“I remember when I lost my mom. It was my fault. I’ll never forgive myself for it.” Loki looks down to see you staring with big doe eyes. He smiles at you, the features on his face softening. “You make me feel better, though.”

I’m glad I can help.

“Were you mute before your parents died?”

No, it was the Hydra agents that twisted my words. Trying to get me to agree to things or say things about my parents. I stopped speaking.

“Hydra agents ma-”

They were the ones with the potion, not SHIELD. They’re trying to find what Hydra used on me and they took me in to protect me, but Hydra would come every day and aim a gun at my head. Asking me questions and threatening me.

“I’m so sorry. That must have been traumatic.”

That is why I don’t speak anymore, saves me from trouble.

“I don’t blame you. You’re very strong, little one.”

You and Loki share a smile, but the awkward silence fills the air. Loki wants nothing more than to hug and hold her, protect her from all the evil things in the world, but you’re timid. He doesn’t want to scare you again.

“I’ll leave you to your book,” he says, “thank you, for telling me everything.”

Thank you for listening.

You smile and nod before heading back to your seat and finishing Wuthering Heights. Loki’s eyes never leave you, though.

Another day or two goes on and you and Loki are closer than before. His whole body is covered in your writings and smears from when he washed off parts for you to write again. He doesn’t ever want to wash it all off, knowing your words are precious and important. You notice the way he rereads what you wrote when he’s sitting or eating. There’s something about his fascination with you that makes you feel important and loved. You’ve caught him a couple times smiling as he reads, byt quickly becoming stoic again when he realises you’re looking.

You’re baking a bunch of cookies for when the team comes home. The mission should be over in about a day and you wanted to surprise them. Loki comes walking in to see you covered in flour and munching on some spare dough that was too little to make a cookie. He chuckles at the sight of you and comes up behind you, wrapping his arms around your waist.

“What in the good heavens are you doing?”

You turn around and chuckle silently, pointing to the over. Loki slightly opens it and sees the pan of cookies baking.

“I didn’t know you baked.”

You grab your pen off the counter and write on his shoulder. 

I love baking, music, and sewing.

“You learn something new every day,” he chuckles, “Can I help?”

I’d love that! I need these things mixed, you write as you point to the recipe, think you can do that?

“I think I can manage to mix some ingredients, little one.”

A couple minutes go by as the two of you mix and measure ingredients. You can’t help but watch the way Loki’s strong hands mix everything at a vigorous speed. You peel your eyes away, trying to not get caught and embarrass yourself.

What you don’t realize is the way Loki steals glances at you when you’re not looking. He loves the way your hair dances as you move around, the way you climb onto the counter to reach the highest shelves. You’re so focused while baking with your eyebrows furrowed and fingers skimming the bowls. He’s never seen a creature more adorable and divine. Then Loki notices the flour on your cheek and laughs, getting your attention.

“You have a little something on your face.”

Reaching out, he brushes the flour off of your forehead. The heat coming from your body is intimidating, calling him to get closer to you to warm up, but he denies himself. He brushes his hand against a towel to get rid of the flour before turning to you, who blows a little flour on him, covering his clothes in the white dust.

“Oh, you little-”

You start running around the island as Loki chases you. He laughs as you try to evade him, but he slips his arm around your bicep, pulling him into you. You fall on top of him, his body breaking the blow to your head. 

Lifting yourself up, you look down to see Loki under you, his arms still around your waist. His eyes go big as soon as he realizes you’re straddling him in the worst place possible. He prays to Odin that you don’t feel his boner as you lay on top of him. You blush as you two stare at one another in the tight embrace

“I uh-” Loki stutters as his eyes flicker to your lips, trying to focus on anything but the heat of your body on his.

All of a sudden, there’s a horrible sound coming from outside the tower. It pierces your ears, forcing you to cover them and drop on top of Loki fully. He pulls one arm around your whole body and cradles your head in his other.

“What is that sound?” he winces. Loki looks over to see the Quinjet landing and Sam Wilson running out of it.

Sam’s eyes go wide at the sight of you and Loki embracing on the floor. He notices the writing all over Loki’s arms and legs and the way he smiles as he looks up at you. He shakes it off as he goes in seeing that he has bigger problems at hand. “Y/N!” He shouts.

You look up to see Sam in a hurried scared face.

“We need you! Bucky got hurt and may not live! We need you to save him!”

[loving-all-for-loki]

Voiceless Love Chapter 7: Missing You

Loki x reader, Bucky x reader

Word count: 2166

Warnings: swearing, sad reader, Bucky fluff

A/N: Okay, so for anyone who’s reading this as their introduction to this series, Loki is not in this a ton. I have a little, but if you didn’t read chapter 6, this is going to be very confusing. As for the series, this is the last “base” chapter meaning there are going to be two different options: the Bucky route and the Loki route. There may be three to four more chapters on each route until the end, I’m not entirely sure, but the choose your own part of the series starts after this chapter. I will be posting the next chapter for each route at the same time so the schedule is still continuous. Also for my tag lists, I will be tagging you in both. If you’d rather not be tagged in both and just one, please let me know. <3 Other than that, thank you for all the support. Remember the tag list is still open if you want to get tagged in the upcoming chapters. Back to the heart wrenching story.

Tag List: @caffeineoverloadandstudying @zizzlekwum @daddysfavoritesexkitten @buckylokisimp @magicalpieex @lokiyoulittle

You’re not sure how long it’s been since Loki was taken back to Asgard. Someone could tell you it’s been an hour or two months, but it wouldn’t make a difference. The outside light has not seen your room since. Your heart has not felt joy. The Avengers have not been blessed with your presence. 

Bucky started to get really concerned for you days ago. They haven’t seen you come out of your room for food or even the bathroom. Tony teased the thought of you being dead, but nobody found it funny. Bucky even yelled at him for the insults about Loki still, knowing if you were to hear them by any chance, you’d go ape shit.

He’s tried to make contact with you, but he fails every time. Leaving food by your door, sliding notes underneath, even knocking and begging you to talk to him, but he’s always faced with deafening silence. His heart has not been the same since you locked yourself away. Steve complains about him no longer being a good spar partner and replacing him with Sam. He’s been left out of two missions for not being focused enough or being too chaotic. One time our of pure anger, Bucky ignored Cap’s orders and almost got himself killed.

“Bucky this isn’t the time to play around. We need you in the game. Don’t screw up again.”

“I’m sorry, Steve, but I-” “There are no buts in war and I think you’d know that. I understand your concern for Y/N, but you need to let it go. She’s not coming out. Leave her be. Focus on the missions or else I’m going to have to bench you.”

Bucky knows Steve is right, but there’s nothing he can do to stop his brain from thinking about you all day long. Every time he passes the library, he longs for the time where you would spend all day there reading stories about love and adventure. He longs for when you’d sneak into his room and spend all day in bed with him, asking him to read to you. He longs for your writings on his skin again. He feels so empty and boring without your scribbles all along his arm.

He sits around the living area ll day, drinking coffee and staring out of the window. The tower feels so quiet without you and Loki running around giggling, baking, reading, etc. It doesn’t feel like home even if home involves Bucky watching someone he loves love someone else. He misses your touches and glances. The way you’d offer for him to join you or taste the cookies you made. He even misses the occasional times Loki put too much salt in the cookies and made him eat them. 

Bucky walks over to the door to your bedroom solemnly. He slides down the door and sits there with his long legs blocking the whole floor of the hall. He slowly rolls his knuckles on the door, knocking and hoping to get your attention yet he gets no response.

You’ve been under your blankets crying for so long, you don’t know how time works. The only thing reminding you that you’re alive is the times when Bucky comes and tries to talk to you. You have no energy to get out of bed due to the consistent crying you’ve been doing. You feel like you’re getting weaker every day. It’s the same feeling as when you healed Bucky from almost dying. Moving becomes a chore and you can’t fathom doing anything. No one is really sure how you haven’t eaten or peed for this long, even you. Sometimes you like to think it’s Loki’s magic allowing you to mourn the loss of him working. There are moments where you feel him around you.

You miss his cold touches, sending chills down your spine. His bedroom has become a place of pain and you refuse to go near it. Because he isn’t around to pick you up, you haven’t drank or taken a bath either. You completely ignore taking care of yourself. There’s no point in taking care of yourself if there’s no one to admire you. 

Bucky comes up to your door again and starts knocking. You see his body block some of the light coming from under your door, showing that he’s sitting there. The sound surrounds you in the quiet room and drowns out your sobs. 

“Y/N, please talk to me. We’re all concerned for you and want to help you.”

You ignore his voice, turning over to look at the wall opposite of it. Pulling the blankets over your head, you try to fall asleep but Bucky keeps talking to you through the door.

“I remember when I fell off the train back in… actually, I don’t remember when, but I woke up and was surrounded by Hydra. For years, I felt alone. I would black out at times when they controlled me and I didn’t know what was happening. Then Steve found me and told me he knew me. I was confused and scared. I was a soldier with no memory. For months, I was with someone who knew me, but I felt so alone. There was so much I was missing and didn’t know. Everything terrified me and made me alarmed. I was on the edge of my seat all the time. What I’m trying to say is I know how you feel. You miss someone you care for and I missed a whole part of my life I longed for again. I felt the loneliness you’re going through and I isolated myself, too. It was a terrible time and I want to help you. I don’t want you to deal with the feelings because I remember how it felt. Please, let me help you.”

At the end of his long speech, you felt yourself get up off of bed, still covered in your blankets. You open the door and look down at Bucky sitting with his legs out. He looks up to you with a pity smile as you stare down, still with tears running down your face. Bucky stands up and pulls you into him, holding you in a tight embrace. 

“I know I said some… unkind things and I’m sorry. I’m also sorry you don’t have Loki here. We’ll get him back.”

You don’t believe him when he says they’ll get him back. You’re aware he’s only saying this to make you feel better, but your heart hopes his words are true and honest. The warmth of his body against yours makes you miss Loki even more, wishing it were his body. You squeeze tighter, imagining Loki in your head with his long hair, blue eyes, and strong hands. Bucky squeezes back, rubbing his hand up and down on your waist. 

“You’ll be okay, doll.”

You back up from Bucky’s hug and adjust your blanket. He takes your hand and leads you down the hallways to the living are where Nat, Sam, and Steve are sitting. They quiet down their conversation as you walk in. Nobody looks your way or makes any comment about you leaving your room. Bucky has you sit down at the kitchen counter as he scrummages through the fridge.

“I’m sure you’re hungry. Do want anything specific?”

You shake your head and the way you don’t speak doesn’t go unmissed. Bucky nods, knowing the progress with you talking has gone away and you’re back to square one. He pulls out some leftovers and give them to you. You pick up a spoon timidly and start eating, but Bucky thinks you look weak. Your hand is shaking as you bring it to your mouth. It’s as if you had healed him again. 

“Are you feeling okay?”

You shake your head no which alerts him. Bucky immediately takes the food from you and picks up you bridal style.

“Bucky, what ARE you doing?” Nat asks.

“She’s not well, I’m taking her to med bay.”

Steve gets up and follows Bucky and you. He watches as you keep dropping your head and waking up as if you can’t stay awake. Steve then looks up to his best friend and sees how tired he looks as well. Everyone’s aware of Bucky’s feelings about you and he knows nothing will change that, even your own love for Loki. Sometimes Bucky’s obsession and attachment to you scares him. He’s worried he’ll lose Buck in his pinning for you, his longing, his jealousy. He’s seen Buck in hard times, but sparring with him for the last two months while you were with Loki was rough to watch. Bucky was rough, sporadic. He was irresponsible during missions, reckless. It was like he had a death wish. 

“Buck,” Steve says once he sees you fall asleep, “we need to talk.”

“Not until she’s being taken care of.”

“That’s the thing. Your attachment to her is unhealthy.”

“Steve, I know you lost your love years ago and I’m sorry, but my love is here in my arms and she doesn’t even know who she is to me. If I can do something, I will.”

“I have nothing against you helping her, but you need to detach from her a little bit. I’m scared for you.

“I’m fine.”

“No, you’re not. You’re going to get yourself killed if you stop stressing over her all the time.”

Bucky doesn’t say anything, knowing that Steve is right. He doesn’t dare to argue against him because a) he doesn’t want to wake you and b) he knows nothing he says will change Steve’s concern for him. He’s right, though. He had been reckless, almost dying even after the first time. He’s hid his injuries from the other teammates, but looking down at you, he can’t help but think how it’s worth it. If he doesn’t have you, he has nothing. As long as you’re around, even if you’re not his, he’s happy.

“She’s all that matter to me now.”

“I understand that.”

They arrive at the Medbay and keep you there. 

Weeks go by and you finally return to the team. Everyone welcomes you back with some drinks and games, trying to get you to warm back up to them. You appreciate the sweet gesture, give into their advances, and stay out there with them. Bucky’s heart jumps with joy seeing you smile and enjoy your time with the Avengers. A couple drinks in and Tony decides to play truth or dare with everyone which makes you roll your eyes.

“Really?” Clint complains.

“What? It’s fun!” “It’s childish, Tony.”

“Yeah, seriously, can’t we play something else?” Steve complains, too.

“How about drink or dare?” Nat offers.

“I like how you think, Ksenia Onatupp.”

Confused, Nat looks to Steve who is equally confused and shrugs. Tony grabs a large bottle of Vodka from the kitchen and sets it on the table.

“Alright, since he made fun of me, I say Legolas goes first.”

“This is so dumb.”

A couple rounds go by and everyone is a little tipsy. You end up sitting on Bucky's lap with your legs across him. He keeps a protective arm around your waist as his metal arm rests on your thigh, rubbing his thumb up and down. Steve keeps looking over to see you two cuddling, disapproving the way Bucky has been ignoring his advice and keeping some distance. He visited you every day while you were recovering from everything.

“Y/N, I dare you to dance.”

You furrow your eyebrows at the lack of music and direction. Tony looks incredibly proud, but as a more sober person, you know how dumb that dare is so you take a drink. Tony groans at you, but everyone else is just drunk enough (beside Thor who could chug three whole bottles of Vodka and feel nothing, lucky duck) to not care. You turn to Bucky and yawn, which is his signal to pick you up and carry you to your room.

You wander to the bathroom in your room to chance while Bucky waits in your room. He looks around at all the new things on your bookshelf. There’s a little stuffed snake which he’s sure Loki got for you as well as a lot of photos of you and him in frames. There’s one of you two during a movie night, you on his lap, and one of him kissing you while dancing. The smile on your face is wider than Bucky has ever seen. He knew you were happy with Loki, he just refused it.

Bucky walks back to your bed when you stroll in. You lay down as he tucks you in and kisses you on the forehead. Before he walks away, you grab his arm and dig through the table next to your bed. You grab your pen which you haven’t used in awhile and write ‘thank you’ on his arm.

“Of course, doll. I’ll see you in the morning.”

[loving-all-for-loki]

Voiceless Love Chapter 9: Evermore

(Bucky’s route)

Bucky x reader

Word count: 2264

Warnings: fluff, some angst, SMUT (unprotected sex, you know better).

Tag List: @caffeineoverloadandstudying @zizzlekwum @daddysfavoritesexkitten @magicalpieex @buckylokisimp @lokiyoulittle

A/N: So, because I originally intended for this to be a Loki x reader, I couldn’t bring myself to write a ton of more Bucky chapters. I kind of got bored with it and I don’t know how to write Bucky well for long so this is the last Bucky chapter. I want to thank everyone who made it to the end. I feel very blessed for how well this series was accepted considering how new I am to writing fanfiction. 

There’s this old Bruce Lee quote that goes, “Love is like a friendship caught on fire. In the beginning a flame, very pretty, often hot and fierce, but still only light and flickering. As love grows older, our hearts mature and our love becomes as coals, deep-burning and unquenchable”. It’s completely accurate. 

When you first met Bucky, it was a friendship. He took you under his wing as a friend and as a mentor, one newbie to another. He was quiet and civil. It’s what drew you to him, but after months you became infatuated. Neither of you left each other’s side, until Loki came around.

That’s the flickering, or your flickering. He swooped in like a knight on the back of a donkey. He was unlikely, a rare and unstable love. You remember when you first met him. Quiet like Bucky, he had a strong presence, one that was to be noticed. Unlike Bucky, he wanted nothing to do with you at first until he got to know you. He realized you were more, but he left. His light flickered out and your flickering like with Bucky vanished. It returned full and brighter than before.

It became unquenchable. You were once again glued to him and him to you. Bucky was there through heartbreak, injury, joy, and accomplishments. After some convincing, Tony eventually let you join the team on missions and help heal on the battlefield. Had it not been for you, Steve, Bucky, and Sam would have died multiple times. Every time healing them sent you to the hospital, Bucky would stay by your side until you were dismissed.

Bucky at one point fought for you, telling the team you couldn’t keep giving them all of your life. They decided to keep you as an emergency or slight injury medic. If they barely got scratched, you would quickly heal them or if they were about to die as well. You stopped healing broken arms and pulled muscle, letting yourself recover from missions.

Now, going through your boxes to put away, you find photos of when you first joined the team. Photos of you with Bucky on late nights, you with Nat and Wanda drunk, you with Steve, Bucky, and Sam drunk. A lot of photos of you with the team drunk. You laugh at Bucky’s expression in some of the photos. Happy. Tired. Drunk.

“Why do you have so many photos of us drunk?” Bucky laughs. 

He turns to see Bucky looking over your shoulder at the photos. You chuckles as you hand him some more of you and the team. 

“Man, we had some fun.”

“Had? We still have fun with them?”

“Not as much. Do we forget who wanted to be on “emergency mode” for the team?”

“I see it as temporary retirement.”

Bucky laughs at your comment as he hands you the photos back. He goes back to putting dishes away into the cupboards. Had anyone told you that two years after you met the super soldier, you’d be moving into an apartment with him while engaged, you’d smack them and chuckle. If anyone told you that you’d be talking to someone as if you’ve always talked, you’d laugh even harder.

But here you are with Bucky, unpacking boxes into the new places and cleaning the surfaces. You set up an old record player he had bought for you last Christmas and put one some old records from Bucky’s childhood. Every so often, he’d stop what he’s doing and make you dance with him. Most of the time it would be a slow song you’d waltz around to, him kissing your neck and making you giggle.

After hours of unpacking, Bucky and you sit down on your new couch. You both take in a deep breath and fall on each other’s shoulders, laughing. Bucky wraps an arm around you and pulls you into him, you laying your head on his lap. He runs his fingers through your hair and looks out the window. The scenery of New York is so calm and familiar. You two debated between moving somewhere far or staying in the area, but knowing how the Avengers are always getting themselves in trouble (and how Bucky still goes on every mission with them), you decided to stay in New York.

You’re not complaining though. It’s such a beautiful sight and it’s home. Having lived in New York for two and a half years now, you feel at home here. It’s almost as if it’s always been home, but now Bucky is home, too. Your heart lies with him and this city. Sure, Loki took a piece of your heart with him to Asgard, but you remind yourself that muscles can get stronger.

You try not to think about Loki often. It only depresses you and puts Bucky in a bad mood, but you can’t help it. Losing a love is hard and sometimes you wish you could forget him entirely, as if it would be easier, but you know you can’t. Bucky has respected your feelings for Loki throughout the time. When you two moved and were packing your things, Bucky didn’t make you throw out the photos of Loki. He never made you get rid of the memories. You kept them in a safe box in your new closet.

But seeing your whole new life, the photos with Bucky, it reminds you why you moved on. You knew you couldn’t hold onto Loki forever, especially after you found out Thor was no longer fighting Odin for his freedom. It was hard, but you knew to save your heart, you had to. Bucky made it easy. He let you talk about him. He let you cry and rant about Loki. It broke his heart to see you in so much pain, but he knew it would pass.

It did pass after a while. You found a new yet familiar love in Bucky. Something warm, comfortable, easy. Bucky’s quietness and security made it easy to love him. He was a man of few words, except with you and you were a woman of none, except with him. It’s a dynamic you can live in and a dynamic that works. Anytime you were out of words or didn’t feel good, you didn’t speak and he was okay with that. He doesn’t take it personally anymore.

“I love you,” he mumbles. “I love you, too.” 

He smiles at your words, knowing how much they mean and how much sentiment they hold. After so long, he lingered on every word of yours, not wanting to miss a single one. Even the avengers quieted when you spoke. You eventually got comfortable enough in front of everyone to say a few words. They managed to coax a couple ‘yes’ and ‘nos’ out of you and then a little while after, they got a few ‘thank yous’ and ‘no problems’. Steve watches Bucky whenever you speak, seeing the smile spreading on his face.

Getting engaged to Bucky brought the greatest smile and that changed Steve’s opinion on everything. Even after dating Buck for a year, Steve wasn’t sure about your relationship with the soldier. He still thought you two were too dependent and immature, but he saw the way you grew together and he knew. He knew you both were good for each other in the long wrong. 

“You want to get Mexican or Chinese?”

“How about Japanese?”

“Sushi?” You ask with a cocked eyebrow.

“Yeah, I’ve never had it.”

“I’m shocked.”

“Well, Hydra wasn’t one for non-mush paste foods and all Stark ever bought was shawarma.”

“I never understood his love for shawarma.”

“Neither did I.”

You both laugh before order yourself some food. You continue to unpack as the food is delivered. When Bucky opened the door for the delivery woman, he was stunned to see her drop the food and walk away fast.

“I think the food lady was scared of me,” he chuckles.

“Well, do remember what the whole world thinks of you.”

“You’re right, but I hate it.”

You sit down to eat and put on some show. After eating all the sushi at record speed, you find yourself yawning and falling asleep on the couch. Bucky watches you as your chest rises and falls in your deep exhaustion. He can’t fathom how beautiful you are and how lucky he is that you are his. He continues to watch you for ten more minutes before picking you up and sets you down on your shared bed. 

Bucky crawls in behind you, wrapping his arms around your body and holding you close. You rustle around and push yourself closer to him. Bucky tries to swallow the feeling he gets when your butt rubs against him, knowing now isn’t the time to start anything with you, but he can’t help it. He thrusts into you, startling you.

“Bucky, what the-”

“Shhh.”

Bucky gets on top of you and kisses you hard.  You tangle your fingers in his hair as you deepen the kiss. You can feel his smile against your lips, making you internally giggle. His metal arm rests on your cheek, his thumb brushing against it, as his other hand strokes up and down your waist. It leaves bruises as he goes, squeezing you, getting closer to you. You buckle  your hips against him, drawing out a moan from his lips.

He leans back for you two to take a deep breath, stripping yourselves of your clothes as you do. You admire Bucky, who sits shirtless in front of you. His scars and bruises mark him perfectly, depicting a man of strength. Bucky’s eyes can’t leave your body, the way it curves and rests. He sees you as this goddess of grace and beauty, something to be worshiped.

And he does worship you. He leaves trails of kisses down your neck to your stomach, stopping right over your mound. His hot breath fans over your fold, sending chills down your spine and making you want more. Your whining begs him to get closer to you, which he teases with kisses on your inner thighs. Your wetness drips on to the bed, capturing his attention, which he replies with by capturing your slickness. His tongue presses against you, sweetly and warmly. Your moans encourage him, but he stops coming back up and hover over your bod.

Bucky slides his pants off and holds the base of his cock. He’s thicker than you imagine and for a brief second you think he won’t fit until he slowly slides into you. You can feel your walls stretching around him as the sting settles in. 

“Move,” you command.

He starts thrusting slowly until he sees the way you whine, bursting into a gruesome pace. You scream out in pleasure, gripping his biceps as he hovers over you, pounding relentlessly into your wet.

“Fuck,” he moans, “feel so good.”

He leans down further and places a hand on your throat, gently squeezing. A smile spreads across your face as he does.

“Kinky little girl,” he chuckles.

His grip becomes tighter until you can feel yourself struggle a little. There’s a buzzing feeling in your lower abdomen, signaling the closeness of your orgasm. Bucky can feel you clench a little on his cock which is now buried deep in you. He stops his fast pace and changes it for a painful beating. He thrusts long and hard, surely leaving bruises from where your bodies collide. You feel your orgasm coming closer and Bucky can tell.

“Don’t cum, yet.” “B-Bucky, please.”

“Not until I say so.”

He continues to choke you as his hard thrusts become unbearable. It’s impossible to hold the orgasm back as you let it go, cumming all over his thick cock.

“Bad girl,” he growls. Bucky pulls out of you despite your complaints and flips you over so your ass is in the air. “I didn’t say you could cum.”

You feel a hard sting on your ass after Bucky smacks you. He smiles when the red mark on your skin appears, matching it on the other side of your cheek. There’s no time in between the spanks. Your ass turns bright red.  

All of a sudden, you feel an intrusion as Bucky slams into you unexpectedly. You cry out in pleasure and pain as he thrusts as hard as he can. The bed shakes and hits the wall in time with Bucky’s thrusts, as well as your moans. They only spur him on, drawing another orgasm out of you.

He doesn’t stop to let you recover for a second. He grunts as his orgasm comes close, his hands gripping you harder and leaving bruises on your waist. The pace starts to stagger.

“Fuck, baby.”

“Cum for me, Bucky,” you order in a sweet tone.

Your words put him over the edge as he cums inside of you, his dick twitching against your walls as he paints them white. He lets out a large deep grunt as he releases, making you even wetter. Pulling out, Bucky takes a deep breath and disappears.

You fall foward on your stomach and breath as he returns with paper towel. He smile and shrugs, you both knowing it’s the only thing you have while unpacking. He cleans you both up before getting in bed next to you, pulling you close to him. You rest your head on his chest as he wraps his metal arm around you, kissing your forehead.

Laying here, you knew you made the right choice, moving on with Bucky. He was home.

[loving-all-for-loki]

here everyone so a quick update! I wasn’t able to get the next Loki chapter of Voiceless Love finished so it will be posted tomorrow in stead! I’m so sorry for the inconvenience but I am still on vacation and trying to enjoy myself. 💜