#we’ll gain some holy insight as to where the mechanic is

[sea-jello]

why would they just stare at the train 💀💀 what were they hoping to accomplish

[c-is-for-circinate]

More post-ep thoughts

....what, you thought I WOULDN’T be back with meta bits?  This is C’s fandom corner over here, the meta comes fast and hot my friends.  Please ignore the past three months’ evidence to the contrary.

Right now I’m thinking about Fjord’s level in warlock, which I know I saw a bit of speculation on in the past week.  I wanted to wait until the episode aired to see if I could gain some insight from how he seemed in play, and I think maybe I did.

Mechanically, this choice makes sense for a couple of reasons.  Level 10 is a really useful one for a warlock--Fjord gets a new cantrip (I don’t think we got to see which one he picked!) and also picks up Armor of Hexes.  This ability effectively means that, when Fjord uses Hexblade’s Curse in battle, that enemy has a 50% chance of missing him even after it rolls a successful attack.  For Fjord that’s huge.  It definitely could’ve saved his life in the sea battle two episodes ago, and as the M9 continue on to even more powerful enemies, it could really help his sturdiness keep up.

On the other hand, level 3 for a paladin is...tricky.  Level 3 is where you get your Sacred Oath.  And as much as taking that level of warlock makes mechanical sense, I am wondering if this was the thing that helped Travis make the decision here.

I really love the paladin Sacred Oath, because out of all the class specializations, this one says so much about the character’s choices and priorities.  Yes, you get Channel Divinity and cool abilities, but they’re a lot less diverse than, say, comparing an Arcane Trickster to an Assassin.  A paladin Sacred Oath tends to have a lot to do with who that paladin wants to be for their deity and their own moral standards, even more than mechanics.

Vax took the Oath of Vengeance because it was the middle of the Chroma Conclave, they were hunting dragons, he hated Thordak with (un)holy fury, and also at that point, it felt like “slaughter the Raven Queen’s enemies for her” was the only thing he really had to offer.  It’s not a good indicator of Vax’s compassion or sense of joy and fun, which are all very true facets of him, but it makes a lot of sense for the character in the moment and what he thinks he’s supposed to be promising to his god.

I have been wondering for three months what oath Fjord was going to take (I have a paladin problem, we’ve discussed this), and I choose to be intrigued rather than disappointed that the answer so far is “none of them”.  Because maybe Travis (and, caught in a single breathless frozen moment, Fjord) was wondering too.

I keep thinking Fjord’s prayer to the Wildmother.  “I’m sorry I’m a dumbass who didn’t check in with you, please help my people.”  He’s definitely still feeling the love and devotion there!  He’s also maybe feeling a little embarrassed/ashamed after the whole dying debacle, or even just distracted by it.  He doesn’t entirely think he knows what he’s doing for her, or even with her, not yet. 

I don’t think Fjord knows what he would swear if he took an oath at this stage.  What does the Wildmother want from his devotion?  Who does he want to be for her, for the rest of his life?  Who is he becoming?  Level 3 of paladin is about making that choice, deciding what your path is about, and for a game that’s as character- and RP-heavy as Critical Role, it can be a really big deal.  And maybe Fjord’s not ready.

I’m choosing to look at the level in warlock, until further notice, as Fjord still having these powers and this connection that’s not going away--and starting to realize he can use them on his terms.  He threw away the sword and still was not free.  The orb is out of him, and maybe he’s still not free, not if Uk’otoa still wants revenge.  He still has these powers, and they are never leaving, but--maybe he understands them a little better, now.  Maybe he can use them to protect himself.  Maybe he can make this his.  And the next time Uk’otoa comes for him, he’ll be even better protected against him.

We’ll see if further RP plays this out, but if I’m right, I would hope Fjord spends this level figuring out how to be a paladin so he is ready to take his oath next level.  But it’s not a bad story if Fjord continues to learn and grow in the powers that he originally took for Uk’otoa and now claims for himself, and tries to turn around and use them for the Wildmother rather than drawing power from her directly.  There’s a lot that’s interesting in there.  I’m curious to see how it goes.

[raeynbowboi]

The Character Forge: How to Play as Bender Bending Rodriguez in DnD 5e

For this build, we want to embody everyone’s favorite wanna-be folk singer, Bender from Futurama. We need a build that will make bender great at all the things he loves to do, including cheating, gambling, cheating at gambling, smoking, drinking, wanting to kill all humans, stealing, and selling Fry’s blood on more than one occasion.

Your Standard Mom’s Friendly Robot Co. Bending Unit

We’re an amazing futuristic mechanical man with extendo-arms and a cheating softwear built in. So, for race we’re Warforged. Bender is designed for neither combat nor speed, despite being a certified war hero, so he’s an Envoy Warforged. Envoys get +1 CON and +1 to two different stats. Since Bender’s a convicted felon and he’s built to bend steel girders for the construction of suicide booths, we’ll give him +1 DEX and +1 STR. They also get proficiency with a tool and a free language. We would give him Spanish or Binary, but those aren’t DnD languages, so substitute whatever you want. Envoys also get to integrate a tool they’re proficient with into their body, giving them tool expertise with one tool. For Bender, we’ll choose Thieves’ Tools. However, Cooking tools is a back-up option.

For Alignment, we’re a known criminal. We have friends, but we’ve referred to them as accomplices and sold naked pictures of them when we haven’t threatened to drop them off the Statue of Liberty and selling their blood. So, we’re Chaotic Neutral. Sometimes helpful, often not.

For background, we’re a Criminal. He’s a convicted felon, and he loves stealing and taking things.

It’s important to remember that for Bender, intoxication works opposite of a normal human. Robots need alcohol to fuel their power cells, and sobriety makes them delirious and weak. Talk with your DM about reversing the standards of intoxication for your build of Bender.

What a Classhole

Cleric     Trickery: Bender has only been religious on two instances, but if given the chance to worship a holy con-artist? He’d probably be interested in such a god, and take notes on their capers. Then rob them.

Monk     Drunken Master: Normally, I don’t like this subclass, but Bender does drink excessively, so it fits.

Rogue     Swashbuckler: A charming dastardly rogue with rakish audacity. Bender definitely has some charm to him.     Thief: Bender is a criminal and can climb without taking an action, which he can just use his extendo-arms to do.

Stats and Proficiencies

In order to be a master thief, we’ll need top billing going to our Dexterity. As a robot programmed to bend steel girders, so he needs at least above human Strength and Constitution. Bender’s also a lovable rascal, so a good Charisma stat is also important. But his Intelligence and Wisdom are subpar.

Acrobatics Athletics Deception Intimidation Performance Sleight of Hand Stealth

Name: Bender Bending Rodriguez Race: Envoy Warforged Background: Criminal Alignment: Chaotic Neutral Class: Thief Rogue (20) Base Stats: Strength: 16 (+3) Dexterity: 20 (+5) Constitution: 20 (+5) Intelligence: 8 (-1) Wisdom: 8 (-1) Charisma: 14 (+2) Saving Throws: Strength: +3 Dexterity: +11 Constitution: +5 Intelligence: +5 Wisdom: +5 Charisma: +2 Combat Stats: HP: 203 AC: 16 Speed: 30 Initiative: +5 Proficiency Bonus: +6 Passive Perception: 9 Dark Vision: 0 feet Proficiencies and Expertise:    Acrobatics (Rogue)    Athletics (Warforged)    Deception (Criminal)    Intimidation (Rogue)    Performance (Rogue)    Sleight of Hand (Rogue)    Stealth (Criminal) Skills: Acrobatics: +11                  Medicine: -1 Animal Handling: -1           Nature: -1 Arcana: -1                          Perception: -1 Athletics: +9                       Performance: +8 Deception: +14                  Persuasion: +2 History: -1                          Religion: -1 Insight: -1                           Sleight of Hand: +17 Intimidation: +14                Stealth: +17 Investigation: -1                 Survival: -1

Damage Resistances:     Poison Condition Resistances     Poison Condition Immunities     Disease

Bonus Actions:

Cunning Action: Aim, Dash, Disengage, or Hide once per turn. Fast Hands: Use your Cunning Action to make Sleight of Hand checks, use Thieves’ Tools, or take the Use Object action.

Reactions:

Uncanny Dodge: Take half damage from an enemy you can see.

Features:

Blindsense: Know location of hidden creatures within 10 feet. Criminal Contact: You have a connection of criminals to relay information. Elusive: Creatures cannot gain advantage on you while you are conscious. Evasion: Take 0 damage on a successful Dex save. Integrated Protection: Light armor is built into your body. Your AC is 11 + DEX. Reliable Talent: Skill checks you’re proficient in below 10 become 10. Second-Story Work: Climbing doesn’t require extra movement. Running jump distance increases by 5 feet.  Sentry’s Rest: You don’t sleep. You power down for 6 hours, but stay alert. Sneak Attack: 10d6 extra damage to first attack with advantage on a turn. Stroke of Luck: Treat failed attack or skill check as a 20 once per rest. Supreme Sneak: Advantage on Stealth checks when moving half your speed. Thief’s Reflexes: Take two turns on the first round of combat. Thieves’ Cant: Convey secret messages in casual conversation. Use Magic Device: Ignore class, race, and level requirements for magic items. Warforged Resilience:  You have immunity to disease, advantage on poisoned saving throws and resistance to poison type damage, you don't need to eat, drink, or breathe, you don't need to sleep, you can't suffer from exhaustion, and you can't be put to sleep through magic.

How do you feel about this build of our lovable scoundrel? Would you build him differently? Would you play him a different way? Do you have a request for a character you’d like to see get a DnD build? Let me know, and I’ll see you guys next time in the character forge, where heroes are made.

[and-then-there-were-n0ne]

If scientific discoveries and technological developments split humankind into a mass of useless humans and a small elite of upgraded superhumans, or if authority shifts altogether away from human beings into the hands of highly intelligent algorithms, then liberalism will collapse. What new religions or ideologies might fill the resulting vacuum and guide the subsequent evolution of our godlike descendants?

The new religions are unlikely to emerge from the caves of Afghanistan or from the madrasas of the Middle East. Rather, they will emerge from research laboratories. Just as socialism took over the world by promising salvation through steam and electricity, so in the coming decades new techno-religions may conquer the world by promising salvation through algorithms and genes.

Despite all the talk of radical Islam and Christian fundamentalism, the most interesting place in the world from a religious perspective is not the Islamic State or the Bible Belt, but Silicon Valley. That’s where hi-tech gurus are brewing for us brave new religions that have little to do with God, and everything to do with technology. They promise all the old prizes – happiness, peace, prosperity and even eternal life – but here on earth with the help of technology, rather than after death with the help of celestial beings.

These new techno-religions can be divided into two main types: techno-humanism and data religion. Techno-humanism agrees that Homo sapiens as we know it has run its historical course and will no longer be relevant in the future, but concludes that we should therefore use technology in order to create Homo deus – a much superior human model. Homo deus will retain some essential human features, but will also enjoy upgraded physical and mental abilities that will enable it to hold its own even against the most sophisticated non-conscious algorithms. Since intelligence is decoupling from consciousness, and since non-conscious intelligence is developing at breakneck speed, humans must actively upgrade their minds if they want to stay in the game.

Dataism says that the universe consists of data flows, and the value of any phenomenon or entity is determined by its contribution to data processing. This may strike you as some eccentric fringe notion, but in fact it has already conquered most of the scientific establishment. Dataism was born from the explosive confluence of two scientific tidal waves. In the 150 years since Charles Darwin published On the Origin of Species, the life sciences have come to see organisms as biochemical algorithms. Simultaneously, in the eight decades since Alan Turing formulated the idea of a Turing Machine, computer scientists have learned to engineer increasingly sophisticated electronic algorithms. Dataism puts the two together, pointing out that exactly the same mathematical laws apply to both biochemical and electronic algorithms. Dataism thereby collapses the barrier between animals and machines, and expects electronic algorithms to eventually decipher and outperform biochemical algorithms.

For politicians, business people and ordinary consumers, Dataism offers groundbreaking technologies and immense new powers. For scholars and intellectuals it also promises to provide the scientific holy grail that has eluded us for centuries: a single overarching theory that unifies all the scientific disciplines from literature and musicology to economics and biology. According to Dataism, King Lear and the flu virus are just two patterns of data flow that can be analysed using the same basic concepts and tools. This idea is extremely attractive. It gives all scientists a common language, builds bridges over academic rifts and easily exports insights across disciplinary borders. Musicologists, political scientists and cell biologists can finally understand each other.

In the process, Dataism inverts the traditional pyramid of learning. Hitherto, data was seen as only the first step in a long chain of intellectual activity. Humans were supposed to distil data into information, information into knowledge, and knowledge into wisdom. However, Dataists believe that humans can no longer cope with the immense flows of data, hence they cannot distil data into information, let alone into knowledge or wisdom. The work of processing data should therefore be entrusted to electronic algorithms, whose capacity far exceeds that of the human brain. In practice, this means that Dataists are sceptical about human knowledge and wisdom, and prefer to put their trust in Big Data and computer algorithms.

Dataism is most firmly entrenched in its two mother disciplines: computer science and biology. Of the two, biology is the more important. It was the biological embracement of Dataism that turned a limited breakthrough in computer science into a world-shattering cataclysm that may completely transform the very nature of life. You may not agree with the idea that organisms are algorithms, and that giraffes, tomatoes and human beings are just different methods for processing data. But you should know that this is current scientific dogma, and that it is changing our world beyond recognition.

Not only individual organisms are seen today as data-processing systems, but also entire societies such as beehives, bacteria colonies, forests and human cities. Economists increasingly interpret the economy, too, as a data-processing system. Laypeople believe that the economy consists of peasants growing wheat, workers manufacturing clothes, and customers buying bread and underpants. Yet experts see the economy as a mechanism for gathering data about desires and abilities, and turning this data into decisions.

According to this view, free-market capitalism and state-controlled communism aren’t competing ideologies, ethical creeds or political institutions. At bottom, they are competing data-processing systems. Capitalism uses distributed processing, whereas communism relies on centralised processing.

Capitalism did not defeat communism because capitalism was more ethical, because individual liberties are sacred or because God was angry with the heathen communists. Rather, capitalism won the Cold War because distributed data processing works better than centralised data processing, at least in periods of accelerating technological changes. The central committee of the Communist Party just could not deal with the rapidly changing world of the late twentieth century. When all data is accumulated in one secret bunker, and all important decisions are taken by a group of elderly apparatchiks, you can produce nuclear bombs by the cartload, but you won’t get an Apple or a Wikipedia.

There is a story (probably apocryphal, like most good stories) that when Mikhail Gorbachev tried to resuscitate the moribund Soviet economy, he sent one of his chief aids to London to find out what Thatcherism was all about, and how a capitalist system actually functioned. The hosts took their Soviet visitor on a tour of the City, of the London stock exchange and of the London School of Economics, where he had lengthy talks with bank managers, entrepreneurs and professors. After a few hours, the Soviet expert burst out: ‘Just one moment, please. Forget about all these complicated economic theories. We have been going back and forth across London for a whole day now, and there’s one thing I cannot understand. Back in Moscow, our finest minds are working on the bread supply system, and yet there are such long queues in every bakery and grocery store. Here in London live millions of people, and we have passed today in front of many shops and supermarkets, yet I haven’t seen a single bread queue. Please take me to meet the person in charge of supplying bread to London. I must learn his secret.’ The hosts scratched their heads, thought for a moment, and said: ‘Nobody is in charge of supplying bread to London.’

That’s the capitalist secret of success. No central processing unit monopolises all the data on the London bread supply. The information flows freely between millions of consumers and producers, bakers and tycoons, farmers and scientists. Market forces determine the price of bread, the number of loaves baked each day and the research-and-development priorities. If market forces make the wrong decision, they soon correct themselves, or so capitalists believe. For our current purposes, it doesn’t matter whether the theory is correct. The crucial thing is that the theory understands economics in terms of data processing.

[…] Dataism naturally has its critics and heretics. As we saw in Chapter 3, it’s doubtful whether life can really be reduced to data flows. In particular, at present we have no idea how or why data flows could produce consciousness and subjective experiences. Maybe we’ll have a good explanation in twenty years. But maybe we’ll discover that organisms aren’t algorithms after all.

It is equally doubtful whether life boils down to decision-making. Under Dataist influence, both the life sciences and the social sciences have become obsessed with decision-making processes, as if that’s all there is to life. But is it so? Sensations, emotions and thoughts certainly play an important part in making decisions, but is that their sole meaning? Dataism gains a better and better understanding of decision-making processes, but it might be adopting an increasingly skewed view of life.

[…] Of course, even if Dataism is wrong and organisms aren’t just algorithms, it won’t necessarily prevent Dataism from taking over the world. Many previous religions gained enormous popularity and power despite their factual mistakes. If Christianity and communism could do it, why not Dataism? Dataism has especially good prospects, because it is currently spreading across all scientific disciplines. A unified scientific paradigm may easily become an unassailable dogma. It is very difficult to contest a scientific paradigm, but up till now, no single paradigm was adopted by the entire scientific establishment. Hence scholars in one field could always import heretical views from outside. But if everyone from musicologists to biologists uses the same Dataist paradigm, interdisciplinary excursions will serve only to strengthen the paradigm further. Consequently even if the paradigm is flawed, it would be extremely difficult to resist it.

- Yuval Noah Harari, The Data Religion in Homo Deus: A Brief History of Tomorrow

[doycetopia]

Ravenloft Ironsworn, part 11, The Chapel

The Chapel

“We need to move now before more of those….things come for us.”

Ismark and Ireena nod, glancing around – Ismark uneasily, Ireena more resigned, but both on guard.

Okay. Map time…

[

This is where we left the rubble remains of the gargoyle behind. There’s a faint footpath through the courtyard, through a small gate, now open again, and into…

A smaller courtyard that houses an overgrown, neglected garden, with small flowers reaching sadly skyward against the gloom.

An overlook over the precipice. Dead leaves turn spirals on this large stone balcony, wheeling and careening over the stone railing. Heavy clouds overhead drizzle constantly. The stone construct juts out at least 20 feet away from the cliff face, and looks down on the dim lights of the village of Barovia, far, far below.

The building to our left as we slipped into the overgrown-flower-garden-courtyard is probably, based on the outside of the structure, the castle’s chapel – with faint light leaking out of the windows. “It is so strange to see a space dedicated to the holy, in this unholy place,” murmurs Ireena. There doesn’t seem to be any easy way to get into the chapel from this courtyard – there is no door from the outside into the building in this area. However, the walls of the chapel are pierced by many tall windows. These windows were probably once stained glass art, but most of that glass is broken out, and the windows themselves have been covered with boards. It MIGHT be possible to get into the castle via the chapel, if you can manage to pull or break the boards that block the windows.

And finally…

The northern courtyard surrounding the castle. A quick glance spots a carriage house in the corner of the space, and that MIGHT mean there is a servant’s entrance into the castle in this area as well. (Call it likely, if I use the Oracle.)

We’ll want to move quickly if we want to keep anyone from tracking us down from the noise we made.

And, I mean, all this is interesting and cool, but let’s be honest: I’m breaking into the castle through the boarded up chapel windows

I’m not sure how well this is going to work, but I’m going to engage the Delve mechanics for this. I’m going to call the Castle an Extreme site.

Well okay. Nice start for us.

Delve the Depths says I get to Find An Opportunity:

FIND AN OPPORTUNITY When you encounter a helpful situation or feature within a site, roll on the following table OR if you are making this move as a result of a strong hit on Delve the Depths, you may pick or envision an opportunity instead of rolling.

Then, choose one:

Gain insight or prepare: Take +1 momentum.

Take action now: Make a move which directly leverages the opportunity. When you do, add +1 and take +1 momentum on a hit.

I’m going with “you locate an interesting or Useful object.” And let’s see what’s inside…

THE CHAPEL Dim spots of colored light filter through broken and boarded up stained glass windows, barely illuminating the ancient chapel. Pews and benches lie about the floor in jumbled disarray, coated with centuries of dust.

Slightly above the room’s debris, lit by a single, dim shaft of moonlight, an altar stands upon the platform before the boarded-up windows we pulled open. The light falls directly on a small figurine of pure silver. This room seems as though nothing has disturbed it in centuries, and that nothing ever could.

BEFORE THE ALTAR, ON THE FLOOR A black-robed figure, long-dead, lies collapsed before the altar, still clutching a rusted, curved blade in one skeletal hand, as though he died with his back to the altar. … actually, as you come around the altar, you see that he died because his head was crushed. A great, silver-headed flail – still pristine – has all but demolished the corpse’s skull. The former wielder of the mace is there as well, long-dead and lying on its side on the steps leading up to the platform. The second corpse wears rusting armor, covered by a tunic emblazoned with a centuries-old symbol of the same knightly order you serve.

EXITS The center of the western wall has a great double door that leads into the rest of the ground floor of the castle. On either side of the great door are smaller, arched openings that lead into smaller shadowed alcoves and stairwells. Ireena, looking at the mace, murmurs “a weapon of light – a weapon with a vengeance – you may find this amid the ruins of a place of prayer.” She shivers, looking around. The Vistani fortune teller woman had true sight, it seems. ”

Okay, so there’s a cool shiny toy, but first I want to know about the tableau of violence. I’m going to ask the oracle if this guy in farwarden livery is someone I know.

Oracle says “yes” with a 98.

Is it Reinhardt?

Oracle says “yes” with a 52. Whoa. Okay.

Ireena watches as I kneel near the armored warrior. “Did you know him?”

I can only nod. “The spirit from the graveyard.” A sad, fleeting smile. “The big one.”

“He seems a great knight,” says Ismark. “And wielded a mighty weapon.”

I nod, but I’m frowning. “Actually, Reinhardt favored a great hammer. I’ve never seen that mace before.”

Gather Information

Rolling +wits on this, +1 for having a bond with Reinhardt. I get a 9, versus a 2, and 9 on the Challenge dice. Weak hit, BUT WAIT: my Find an Opportunity strong hit gave me a +1 to this move as well, which makes that 9 a 10. Strong hit!

On a strong hit, you discover something helpful and specific. The path you must follow or action you must take to make progress is made clear. Envision what you learn (Ask the Oracle if unsure), and take +2 momentum.

That’s pretty nice, plus I get another +1 momentum from the Find an Opportunity move, which gets me to 9, and I’m marking a milestone on my “Investigate/Avenge the missing members of the Freewardens” backstory quest.

“The action you must take to make progress is made clear.” Is it? Cuz I’m kind of scratching my head a little bit.

I hit the Action and Theme oracles and get “Hide Memory.” Ooh. Okay. I can do something with that.

So, we have some kind of fight here between a berobed shadowy figure, and a member of the farwardens. Shadow-robe guy trying to block the altar (maybe?), Reinhardt killing him, but dying himself..

Something about the whole thing tickles at the back of Brigitte’s mind – an old legend, or prophecy, or maybe – no – one of the oldest vows ever sworn on iron by anyone in the wardens – some would say the original oath – a vow every member undertakes, symbolically (they thought), when they join the farwardens. A holy relic. Find it and return it to the light.

It’s… impossible. Ridiculous. It’s a myth. A legend. A symbol, not an actual thing.

[I’m imagining here something akin to a knight ten generations removed from King Arthur but nominally part of the same order of the Knights of the Round Table, on an entirely different mission, and literally stumbling across their mentor, who died two steps from the literally Holy Grail. Which is a real thing?!? WTF?]

And if that little figurine on the altar is…

That would make that flail in Reinhardt’s hand…

Oh. Oh crap.

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