#welcome to night vale intro segments

[pod-together]

Pod-Together Day 7 Reveals 2024

Love, not sedition (琅琊榜 | Nirvana in Fire (TV)) written by aninfiniteweirdo, performed by paintchipblue Summary: 'What is this, if not sedition?' The recording only shows stating as Xiao Jingyan doesn't answer out loud.

settling in (Welcome to Night Vale, The Magnus Archives (Podcast)) written by Koschei_B, performed by DuskDragon39 Summary: On his trip through America, Gerry passes an town of interest. In the end, it might not be exactly all he's expected to be, but he can't say he regrets staying in the long run. At the very least, he get to live, and all the dangerous stuff around isn't his concern to deal with. And, just maybe, he likes how friendly the people are, even if it's a little creepy. Sue him. Or better yet, Mary Keay.

Voice and Heart (The Murderbot Diaries - Martha Wells) written by lc2l, performed by EternalLibrary Summary: Good morning this is S9BT5, the heart and voice of your Company Substation. Please be aware that we have visitors onboard the station today from a Preservation Survey Team. Staff are expected to be courteous and welcoming, and to remember that all conversations are monitored for training and enforcement purposes.

Time May Change Me (But I can't trace time) (Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Prequel Trilogy) written by Little_dumpling, performed by Kittona Summary: Anakin’s mother is leaving for Europe and Anakin does not want to come along, thank you very much. But his only other option is to go live on his Uncle Qui-Gon’s horse ranch. Anakin will go, but he did not sign up to do chores!

the cul-de-sac on the spiritual path (The Locked Tomb Series | Gideon the Ninth Series - Tamsyn Muir) written by olive2read, performed by carboncopies Summary: stuck in a random catacomb niche, deep in the Ninth House, Wake gets to know Gideon Nav (whether she wants to or not) -or- 5 times Gideon went to visit her mum’s niche -or- why Wake didn’t take the shot

elutriate calor vulpes (All For The Game - Nora Sakavic) written by Opalsong, performed by Flowerparrish Summary: Andrew hated heats. He hated being vulnerable and out of control. Neil…helped. [4 Heats Andrew Struggled Through + 1 He Enjoyed]

Gifts of Gold (gold) (Star Trek: Deep Space Nine) written by BardicRaven, performed by BardicRavenReads, audio production by OneGoldenRaptor

Two and a Half Men (Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies), The Mortal Instruments Series - Cassandra Clare, Shadowhunters (TV)) written by Sivan325, performed by Ceewelsh Summary: "Do you mind telling me why I have kid-Bucky in my apartment?" Steve asked. Tony looked at him, noticing how the man looked exhausted. "Bucky? A kid? Are you out of your mind?" "How many kids do you know who have a metal arm and long hair?" "Touché."

Blood of the Covenant (is thicker than the water of the womb) (One Piece (Anime & Manga)) written by stereden, performed by Aibhilin Summary: The little postgull drops the newspaper right in front of her and then hightails it away from Mount Corbo, and that should have been her first clue, because the bird usually likes to hang about and beg for scraps. But not this time. No. Because this time, the newspaper has her oldest brat’s picture plastered all over the front page, but it’s not the cocky grin of his wanted poster. No. It’s her kid, bruised and battered and in chains. Firefist Ace, Whitebeard Commander, to be executed! the headline proclaims for the world to see, and Dadan freezes. birds of a feather (Dungeons and Daddies (Podcast)) written by travvymybeloved, performed by godoflaundrybaskets Summary: “Oh, fuck,” Glenn said and through the windshield, Henry could see him throw his joint down onto the dashboard. He threw himself half out the window, leaning out at the waist and throwing open his arms. “Come on, Henry! Go, go, go!” Henry let out a wordless honking noise and started flapping his wings, skipping against the ground and taking off in the air for a few seconds. He hit the ground, took a few shaky steps, then took off again with more confidence. Darryl whooped, starting to rev the car, and Glenn caught Henry out of the air and yanked him into the car. Darryl slammed the stick into drive, the car lurched and shot off across the field, and Ron continued cry-laughing in the backseat as they beat a quick retreat. “You almost got your butt kicked by a bird,” Ron wheezed out, wiping at his eyes, and Henry harrumphed. “Oh my God, that was great.” --- If Henry was asked to guess anything, anything, about Faerûn, "geese act as malicious guides to your soulmate" wouldn't have even made the top 100 guesses. The Hall Pass (หัวใจไม่มีปลอม | Beauty Newbie (Thailand TV 2024)) written by Wereflamingo, performed by Annapods Summary: Liu’s comfortable relationship with her boyfriend Guy gets shaken up when Guy gets cast in a Boys Love series opposite charismatic established actor Saint. Well, Liu thinks he's charismatic. Guy thinks he's extremely annoying and can't be trusted. There's no way that hall pass will ever be needed. Or: a rookie BL actor and his girlfriend acquire a third through the power of BL and complaining about your shared real/imaginary boyfriend. A story about social and parasocial relationships, monogamy and polyamory, sexuality and lack thereof, beauty, choice, and enemies-to-lovers BL, told through voice messages and phone calls on Liu's Phone.

[thatgirlonstage]

Podcast Challenge 12/4/18

Bolded means I listened to an episode today. Strikethrough means I’m all caught up and waiting for the next episode :)

The Adventure Zone | Alice Isn’t Dead | The Bright Sessions | Can I Pet Your Dog? | Ear Hustle | The Flop House | The McElroy Brothers Will Be in Trolls 2| My Brother, My Brother, and Me | Sawbones | Shmanners | The Thrilling Adventure Hour | Welcome to Night Vale | Within the Wires | Wonderful!

Podcast: The Adventure Zone

Episode: Amnesty - Episode 6

Time: 1hr 16 min, 169% of goal

Commentary:

“I think it was all about a young woman named Aubrey Little” -- honestly where is the lie though

Oooh so is the water itself attacking or is there some kind of invisible/transparent creature IN the water? How did it get into the pool? Is it stuck there? Can it travel to different bodies of water? I am excite

Podcast: Ear Hustle

Episode: The Workaround

Time: 35 min, 78% of goal

Commentary:

This whole episode was a prime example of “necessity is the mother of invention.”

Also, I’m really glad we’ll hear more from Lady J - I mean it’s awful that she’s there at all because she shouldn’t have to be in a men’s prison but since she’s there I’m really glad she’ll get to have her voice heard

Podcast: The Thrilling Adventure Hour

Episode: #54: Beyond Belief, “A Dave at the Races”

Time: 21 min, 47% of goal

Commentary:

Hello new intro voice guy

Catcher in the Rye occupies this weird place where I actually do like it but I’m also 100% ready to drag it at any time

Episode: #55: Captain Laserbeam! “Even Bluebirds Get the Blues!”

Time: 20 min, 44% of goal

Commentary:

Okay so... Captain Laserbeam is rapidly becoming my least favorite segment on the show. I just find it too repetitive to be entertaining, I barely listen to it. I think I’d like it more if they subverted expectations a bit more? Like if Captain Laserbeam were actually super incompetent and just THOUGHT he was a really impressive superhero, I think that would be a lot funnier? And it ALMOST goes there... but instead he’s just weirdly oblivious and almost a jerk but he always saves the day anyway and... yeah I don’t like this one very much. Plus, this episode seemed... wildly insensitive. What was with the gay stereotype?

Total Listening: 2hr 32 min, 338% of goal

[cecilspeaks]

112 - Citizen Spotlight

If you see something crawling across your floor in the dark, don’t worry. It’s probably just a tarantula. Welcome to Night Vale.

Listeners, in this fast-paced world of community radio and local news, I think we’ve lost sight of the truly important thing: the individuals who make up our diverse community.

So today, I want to try out a new segment I've put together called Citizen Spotlight, in which we will profile a randomly selected citizen, diving deep into who they are, and maybe discovering some things about ourselves along the way.

Oh, here’s an intro I’m working on for it.

[very deep, menacing voice] Spotlights, roving in the night. Hunting. Closing in. But everything is backwards. The night is hot and bright. The spotlights are deep and black. Everything they touch turns to darkness. They are searching for the light. They consume it.

[chipper voice] That’s a rough draft. I’m open to notes. Anyway, today’s inaugural spotlight was curated by closing my eyes and pointing in the phone book. And so today, we will talk about Sigrid Borg. She’s a brand new citizen who has just arrived in Night Vale. I have hear this classified dossier, we had a team of heist experts – thanks, Janice – steal from the Hall of Public Records. The dossier says that Sigrid was relocated to Night Vale as part of a witness protection program, and that Sigrid is not her real name. Nor is she of the Scandinavian origin her name might suggest. Thus all of the information we managed to obtain on Sigrid for this segment is fictional, created by a government software program to ensure her total anonymity, and in no way represents who she really is as a person. In all probability, it is in most ways the opposite of her true identity, but for safety, it’s important that we all believe this made-up biography is absolute fact. It is extremely, extremely important. She would be in great danger if anyone from the outside world started to doubt who she claimed to be.

We’ll get to our Citizen Spotlight momentarily, but first, as a way to make Sigrid feel more at home, I’ve asked other Night Vale citizens to reveal a dark secret that they’ve never shared. I will be reading those throughout today’s broadcast. The first comes from Susan Escobar, second grade teacher at Night Vale elementary school. She writes: “One night, I was at school late grading homework, and I heard strange sounds coming from the cafeteria. When I looked inside, I saw a giant mandala on the floor made entirely of frozen fish sticks. It seemed to be undulating and alive. When I blinked, it vanished. But every night I dream of flying toward a cloudless sky, and in the center of that sky is that fish stick mandala. And I wake before I reach it, but each dream a little closer. And the night that I reach that mandala in my dream is the night I will die.” Thanks Susan! Sounds fun.

Now let’s talk about Sigrid. Though new to town, Sigrid Borg was born in Night Vale and has lived here her entire life. Her parents were immigrants from the picturesque Swedish port city of Halmstad. She tries to go back at least once a year to visit her grandparents, a retired grade school teacher and a retired timber farmer, who have a lovely cottage overlooking at the mouth of the Nissan river, where it meets the North Sea. Sigrid has always been close with her grandparents, though in recent visits, has become distressed at her grandmother’s increased mental confusion and grandfather’s drinking habits. She doesn’t call them as often she used to and feels guilty about that. She’s torn between the desire to take more responsibility for their health and well being and the desire to block the situation out of her mind completely, as it has become a signifier of the irrevocable loss of her own childhood, and a direct confrontation with morality itself.  

Sigrid’s favorite food is smorgåstårta, a Scandinavian layer cake that is made of sandwiches and fish paste. Ask her to make it for your next big event. She’s been carefully drilled by her witness protection handlers on the foods of her childhood, and has almost got the hang of making them, although she has failed to acquire a taste for fish paste.

Some fun facts that you may not know about Sigrid, despite having lived in the same town with her all your lives. She has a degree in marine hauntology from an online university. She has a disorder that makes it impossible for her to sweat or cry. She has served on the board of the Sand Wastes Conservation Fund for six and a half years. She is deeply embedded into our community and way of life.

And now, another confession from a local resident about a dark secret. This one from my dear friend Earl Harlan. It reads: “On a Boy Scout training maneuver near the old dirt road, I witnessed the apparition of my 10-year-old self wearing the scout uniform of my youth. He trained with us all afternoon, and I tried not to give him any preferential treatment. As the afternoon passed, new memories appeared in my mind of training at 10 years old with a group of strangers, one of whom seemed familiar and stared at me constantly in horror.” That’s adorable! Thanks, Earl!

Back to Citizen Spotlight. Sigrid spent her childhood in the Hefty Sycamore Trailer Park near downtown. She didn’t have many friends; she was shy in school. One year, she tried out for a solo in the school holiday pageant. For the audition, she sang a Flakey-O’s jingle that was very popular at the time, but no one took her seriously. They all thought she was making a joke. She apologized and faded back into the bleachers. She truly loved that jingle. It spoke to her soul, it made her feel something. She recorded it off the radio and listened to it often, rewinding and replaying it out at the picnic table on summer nights, when the rest of her family was asleep. But she never listened to it again after the solo tryouts, because it only brought back the sound of the other kids laughing, of her teacher’s scolding voice lecturing the class to take themselves seriously, or no one else would. And it made her feel ashamed. She eventually recorded over the tape with audio from a TV special about orphaned lion cubs. But sometimes, under the hungry sucking sounds of giant kittens drinking from baby bottles, she thought she could still hear the song.

In 7th grade, she finally made some friends during the unknown creature dissection unit in science class. She wasn’t squeamish, and her ability to identify and extract misshapen internal organs without flinching made her an attractive lab partner. Everyone thought she was new in town because they had never noticed her before. She still has that effect on people. In the spring of that year, someone asked her to to the junior high dance. The team was “heat death of the universe”. The boys spent a lot of time licking the crepe paper decorations to dye their tongues bright colors and impress the girls. The girls were not impressed, but laughed anyway. Sigrid’s date tried to lick her hand to see if the dye would come off on her skin. This caused Sigrid to feel a surge of strange tingling panic, and she fled to the bathroom for 30 minutes. Her friends eventually found her and dragged her back into the gym. She danced with them for the rest of the night, hiding from the boys with the blue tongues.

There were bountiful crops that year. Some say this was not a coincidence. Some say the junior high dance is a secret crop fertility ritual outlined in the town charter, but kept secret from the children who participate. When the dance was cancelled in the following years, due to the crepe paper dye related poisoning incident, Night Vale experienced extreme drought and locust plagues. Some say this, too, was not a coincidence.

A quick bulletin board reminder: the reinstated junior high dance is coming up! May all you young citizen make lush and plentiful memories, and have a cornucopia of fun.

More Citizen Spotlight soon, but first, The weather. 

["Try Try Try" by Rachael Sage]

Another secret confession. Ah, what a treat! This one comes from iconic local celebrity and recent donut food truck entrepreneur, Lee Marvin. It says: “There is a void. Within that void a light. Within that light, a hand. Within that hand, a movement. Within that movement, a potential. Within that potential, everything that ever was.” Thank you Lee, and of course, a happy 30th birthday to you today!

Citizen Spotlight time. In high school, Sigrid’s left hand started to itch below the pinky finger. A small lump appeared which grew slowly over time. She became self-conscious about this and wore bulky sweatshirts with long sleeves pulled over her hands, which was luckily a fashionable look then. The nurse at the health clinic assured her that it was nothing to be concerned about, but it kept growing. Eventually, it took the shape of what appeared to be a second, smaller pinky finger. She was even able to wiggle it if she concentrated very hard. As you may know, the Hefty Sycamore Trailer Park was built on the dried-up shores of the old pesticide waste river, and Sigrid’s father felt there might be some connection between this and the extra finger. They decided to relocate.

They moved into a two-story house by the train tracks, a fixer-upper that shook on its foundation twice a day when the train came through, and once or twice erratically every night when the secret night trains passed, with their nameless and unspeakable cargos. Sigrid’s parents began to fight often, never having the money to fix up the fixer-upper, and they both spent as much time as possible away from home. Sigrid had a complicated relationship with her extra finger at this point, partially blaming it for the rift in her parents’ relationship. Once, when Sigrid was alone in the house, she heard something creeping up the stairs. She hummed the Flakey-O’s jingle til she couldn’t hear it anymore, and then she started spending a lot more time away from home also.

There was a small group of kids who hung out around the train tracks at night, so she started hanging out with them to avoid going home. They liked to smoke cigarettes and light off fireworks and dare each other to look at the secret night trains, although none of them ever did, as they all knew that to look at one of those trains meant an instant and painful death. They would talk and gossip about kids and teachers she’d never heard of before, and she began to wonder if they even went to her school. When she was hanging out with them, she would often glance up at the dark windows of her own empty house just down the tracks and see movement behind the glass. Or soft white eyes staring out.

During one of these movements, while she looked at the house, all her friends disappeared and she found herself alone on the tracks. No sign of the teenagers that had been there mere seconds before. She never saw those kids again, but she often heard their voices in portable radios on the wind, and she spent her evenings wandering up and down the tracks, looking for them.

At the end of senior year, the high school yearbook featured fun awards for each student, voted on by the class. Smartest girl and tallest boy and most likely to survive a mass extinction event, and best smile. Every single student received a commemorative award, except for Sigrid. It wasn’t intentional or out of spite. Everyone forgot that she existed. She was inexplicably absent during every school picture day throughout the years. Never participated in any extracurricular activities, didn’t speak up in class, got average grades, and ate lunch alone. Which some say contributed to her lack of memorability. But she was there, and is here, and always has been. She belongs here. It’s totally normal to forget someone you know, but you do in fact know her. Some of you know her very well.

One time you went thrift store shopping together, and she picked out a jacket for you that was too big, but she said it looked great on you. It was fuzzy and resembled furniture upholstery. Royal blue with gold stripes. The lining was ripped. She bought it for you. You found that old jacket recently, royal blue with gold stripes, you put it on. It almost fits now. You felt something that you hadn’t felt before, sticking against your ribs, tucked into the ripped lining. You reached inside and you pulled out a piece of notebook paper, folded into a hard little square. It was from Sigrid. It described a thing that she shouldn’t have seen, and couldn’t speak about. It instructed you to burn the note immediately, and you did. It instructed you to never acknowledge to her that you even received it. You can never tell anyone what the note said.

If you do run into Sigrid, remember that she is a real person filled with blood and misshapen internal organs, just like you and me. Everything I have told you about her is completely true. Well, none of it is technically true, but it was crafted by state of the art technology to evoke a range of 1-4 feelings in the listener. And as we all know, feelings are real, and truth is in the mind of the beholder. And the beholder lives out in the scorched orchard under the floorboards of the old cherry-picking stack.

Stay tuned next for a mysterious distress signal that requires urgent action, but is impossible to locate.

On behalf of everyone here at Night Vale Community Radio, welcome to your new town, Sigrid – the town where you have lived your entire life.

And to everyone else: Good night, Night Vale, Good night.

Today’s proverb: Be yourself. As if you had any choice in the matter.

[pod-together]

Pod-Together Day 9 Reveals 2023

In the Shadows of Kings (I dream of a crown) [text, audio] (One Piece (Anime & Manga))

written by stereden, performed by Aibhilin

Summary: Buggy knows, from the very moment he meets them, that Gol D Roger will be the King of the Pirates one day, that he will reach that island at the end of the world no matter how much the world tries to stop him.

Buggy knows, from the very moment he meets them, that the King has already chosen his Heir, that Shanks with his Will and his smiles already wears his crown.

(A straw-hat doesn’t look like a crown, and yet.)

Buggy knows, from the very moment he meets them, that he will follow this King to Hell and back. Knows, from the very moment he meets them, that he will follow this Heir even further.

Five werewolf attributes and one werewolf survival strategy that Gerard and Pete discovered through empirical research on Warped Tour (Bandom, My Chemical Romance, Fall Out Boy)

written by Trojie, performed by dapatty

Summary: a.k.a "maybe the real lycanthropy was the friends we made along the way"

Your emotions are mine (Teen Wolf (TV))

written by HadrianPeverellBlack, performed by Rambling_Company

Summary: Soulmates can feel each other emotions.

Death with Dignity [text, audio] (Star Trek, Star Trek: The Next Generation, Star Trek: Voyager)

written by Thebiwife, performed by SweetPollyOliver

Summary: Having lost her father at a young age, Deanna Troi struggles to make sense of many things; her feelings, her abilities (or lack thereof), and how to cope with that void in her life.

Our Energy Signature Means Skullduggery (Our Flag Means Death (TV))

written by secretsofluftnarp, edited by pandamug and tipsy

Summary: UFO enthusiast and Star Trek fan Stede Bonnet unintentionally travels into the future, and ends up aboard the space pirate vessel Kuinian's Revenge.

Just Zelda, Just Link (The Legend of Zelda: Breath of the Wild/Tears of the Kingdom)

written by Zartophski, performed by horchata

Summary: Before the Upheaval, Zelda hides a small gift for Link and never tells him where to look.

After the Upheaval, Link finds it anyway.

question and answer (その着せ替え人形は恋をする | Sono Bisque Doll wa Koi wo Suru | My Dress-Up Darling (Anime))

created by alstroemeria_thoughts and asthewavesdo

Summary: Gojou makes it onto reddit, and uses it to ask questions for Marin.

rational and level-headed (Dimension 20 (Web Series))

written by travvymybeloved, performed by Poluche

Summary: Cody was well-known for his normal and grounded reactions to things. He told himself that frequently. He was good at handling things with grace and poise and wasn’t notorious at all for blowing his shit at the slightest provocation. That was why he was handling being faced with the realization of a lifetime in a rational and level-headed manner.

“You’re sitting in your bathtub and eating an ice cream sandwich because you’re sad but don’t have a tub of ice cream?”

“I mean, yeah.”

Playing for Keeps (Wiedźmin | The Witcher - All Media Types)

written by LenaLawlipop, performed by Chantress

Summary: "Wait, you know her?" Eskel asked, finally. The woman in question walked up to the door to see what the commotion was about. Geralt couldn't help but grin at the shock on her face, and he tried to hide it behind his hand, but the moment she caught sight of him as well, she burst into delighted giggles and he couldn't hold back a snort himself. Eskel whirled around to look at him. "Wait, you know her too?"

"I was about to tell you when you made a detour for this street, but then we heard Lambert, and..." He shrugged, unable to contain his amusement. "I believe we might know the same person in this town."

"Wait, you two know her?!" Lambert cried. "What are you even doing here?!"

In which three Wolves share an unexpected Midsummer celebration with a young woman of their mutual acquaintance.

something new (Welcome to Night Vale)

written by Koschei_B, performed by roseszain

Summary: Fun with holidays and a few moments of contentment

Stones of the Body: Reunion (rose quartz) (Star Trek: Deep Space Nine)

created by BardicRaven and RisalSoran

[pod-together]

Day 17: Merlin, Teen Wolf, Welcome to Night Vale Intro Segments

Teach Me Your Ways (Merlin) written by eledhwenlin, performed by EosRose Summary: Arthur wakes up in the modern world and Merlin has to teach him things. Phases (Teen Wolf) written by unpossible, performed by auroradream Summary: “We weren’t going to get out of the car,” Stiles says again, and big fucking help that is now, with Scott’s side shredded by a fucking sabre-tooth tiger or whatever. “Just tell me what happened,” his Dad says. Open & Notorious (Welcome to Night Vale Intro Segments) written by jedusaur, performed by anotherslashfan, argentumlupine, bessyboo, cantarina, fleurrochard, jedusaur, knight_tracer, regonym, Rhea, Torra, Projectyl and Andy Crosman Summary: We are all, in our own way, Joseph Fink.