#which i know is parasocial and i have no idea how hes actually feeling

[onlymurdersintheafterparty]

OMITB S4:E5 "Adaptation"

We're at the halfway mark and I feel like fans with a Hercule Poirot or Sherlock Holmes type of IQ could solve the mystery by now but I am not one of those fans so I'm just here to recap and debunk or strengthen theories I already had. I say this every week but I am truly loving the pacing of this season and that they don't shy away from answering questions early on instead of trying to shoehorn everything in for the season finale. As always spoilers ahead!

Ok so now we officially have confirmation that there are two killers. After circling back to the footprint on the windowsill of the Dudenoff apartment, the tacky paper used on the photoshoot and production room set reveals that the footprint belongs to one of the Brothers sisters. We see that one twin is physically strong enough to lift a body when she lifts Oliver and moves him onto his correct mark. I don't think that necessarily means both twins are involved in the murder though. We also end the episode with that same twin being missing and hearing a gunshot implying that she has been killed. I have been waiting YEARS for a season in which the bodies start piling up and it's finally happening!

This episode was narrated by Marshall the writer and I don't know how to feel about his character. I get that he and Mabel are supposed to be similar in that they both have imposter syndrome but he in general just gives off red flags. He's inserting himself into investigating which is something killers do and him having the fake facial hair introduces the idea of the killers having disguises so clearly he was important to this episode. Not to mention he's giving stalker vibes or parasocial Arconiac vibes. I find it very interesting that Mabel and Charles did not view the video of his stand up to verify his alibi. This could very well mean that he was at the Arconia the night that Sazz was killed. He also never stepped on the tacky paper so we don't have his footprint. That's two strikes against him.

You know who else we didn't see step on the tacky paper? Glen Stubbins. Who is back by the way. I still don't care for his character but I am starting to suspect him. He's physically capable of jumping on the windowsill because he's a stunt performer and for that same reason I'm sure he's also capable of aiming and firing a gun. Also how did he know exactly where Charles lived? They only met the one time at the Stunt Man bar. And yes it's sweet that he brought bread but he could have left it downstairs with Lester. As Ben's stunt double I can't help but wonder if he was present at the Arconia the night of Sazz's murder but in disguise. There's actually a really compelling theory on the hulu subreddit that Glen is the killer if you want to check it out.

Bev actually does have an alibi for that night and seems to only be guilty of wanting her movie made. Can we rule her out just yet? Idk but we'll see. She didn't seem that confident while aiming the gun or firing it off to prove it wasn't loaded. Her revealing Sazz's voicemail and the time it was left definitely proved helpful in establishing a timeline and confirming that there are two killers. Or three if you think it's three people working together.

Howard working for the production team is only strengthening my theory that he's the Moriarty. This man is everywhere! He was working at the theater last season and immersed in the plot there and now here he is in the center of it all once again. Again I don't think he's an evil mastermind, I just think he started off envying the closeness of the trio and now he's high off the power of manipulating things behind the scenes.

Have any of you heard of the opera La Forza Del Destino? In A Series of Unfortunate Events, there is a reference and parallel to it in which a character is mortally wounded after a weapon is accidentally fired off and strikes them. What if the killer was aiming for Charles, saw Sazz dressed similar to him and was aiming to shoot, and the accomplice called to warn them that it was the wrong person but something startled the killer and they accidentally shot Sazz? Like for example they were ready to go and then someone knocked loudly or something which not only muffled the noise of the phone but startled them enough to shoot.

This season has so many parallels and coincidences that we have to assume is on purpose. We've got multiple dopplegangers and cases of mistaken identity, guns being misfired (Eva with Rudy's prop gun and Bev with Sazz's loaded gun), and even the blackout in the S4 premiere vs the fire alarm going off in the S1 premiere.

My small takeaways from the episode:

Mabel being 30 and having an identity crisis is so relatable and I hope she finds her way by the end of the series.

Lester talking about wearing a gimp mask is WILD

Charles mentioning having an account in Belize and Detective Williams pretending to unhear it is hilarious

I'm beyond tired of this Oliver and Loretta plotline and him being insecure about her new status as a celebrity. WRAP IT UP!

Fans keep bringing up the cold case and I wonder if that will become the plot point in season five

Zach Galifianakis telling Oliver about how Jonk (sp?) ran through the seven dwarfs and that they could be heard Hi-Ho'ing from the trailer took me out 🤣

Charles having a new murder board each week is my favorite thing because that's literally all of us fans each week after watching a new episode

Bev and Cinda would be besties or frenemies and I really need to see them in a scene together before the season is over

[allylikethecat]

designated twitter reporter coming in with some wedding!gatty content https://x.com/shesgotnosoul/status/1791964661694292370?s=46

OMG hello my dearest Designated Twitter Reporter I am SCREAMING (the tweet can be found HERE) I love how easy it is to pick George out in a crowd because he's so tall and so large and I also am just like forever amused by how tiny Matty looks next to him. But look at them!! Dancing and having a good time at the wedding! I love their friendship so much! Thank you so much for sending this my way!! I hope you are having a wonderful weekend and I look forward to hearing from you soon!!

❤️Ally

[detectiveluke7]

Hot take, it is just as parasocial to hate or freak out over every single cc because they “took too long” to respond or speak about everything going on with Shelby and Will as it is to hero worship them. I want to touch on some things, as there are people on here conveniently forgetting empathy as soon as it no longer fits a situation they feel strongly about.

Let’s start with the fact that many of the creators involved did not chose to speak on matters until they felt "safe" to do so, as I've seen some users on here saying. Yes, it's true. Many of them didn't publicly show support for Shelby or condemn Will until he made his own statement. Supposedly, many of them also knew about his behavior weeks/months. But let's look at the facts.

Firstly, these content creators are going to go about their public images very carefully. It's their job after all, and they are hyper aware that anything they say and do is going to get scrutinized to no end. Of course they're prioritizing self preservation. I think shaming any of them for that is the same as shaming a customer service worker for being polite to a rude customer. For the ccs, it's always going to be a doomed if they do speak up, doomed if they don't. It doesn't hurt to note that it's very smart for these people to think before they speak. The last guy who didn't think before yapping had people spreading around that he was a child groomer for a year.

Secondly, hindsight is a bitch. We all like to think we know better, but guess how people become victims of abuse in the first place? When someone is generally liked by other people, and all of your friends seem to get along fine with him, you might overlook any strange or off behavior that makes you uncomfortable. Especially if you see this person once in a blue moon, it could feel wrong to make a big deal out of something that might just be a you problem.

We also have no idea what could be going on behind the scenes. Who reached out to Shelby privately to show their support, who had a pr team telling them to wait before doing anything, who thought it was best for themselves to wait so they don't act purely on emotion, who had other pressing matters that they needed to attend to regarding their personal lives, etc etc. It's so easy to forget that the guy in our screen is a person, and that they too do other things that we don't see.

I don't think anyone is a bad person for no longer wanting to watch and support these creators. People can do what they want with their own time, which is a nice little perk we got when we have autonomy. Guess what though? No one is wrong for still wanting to support and watch those content creators either, as they aren't guilty of shit.

At the end of the day, it's pretty counterproductive to be creating more problems out of something that was supposed to be about warning everyone of a gross man, and any other signs of abuse to look out for in our own lives. Instead of making this situation a "keep the ccs accountable" party, lets make this a "support Shelby and other victims," affair. And yes, let's keep denouncing Will, the actual abuser.

[kerubimcrepin]

Wakfu Manga - Tome 1, Part 1

Finally, finally, finally we have arrived to one of my most favorite Wakfu media — the manga that happens between Season 2 and the OVAs, which are controversial among many, and beloved only by me and only for, like, 2-3 scenes.

The reason for my excitement is simple: this is the Krosmoz media that is the most abundant in adult Joris content at this moment.

The princesses got cursed again..., I don't even know what to say, man. They never learn.

[imagines Joris at 3-4yo trying to bite the nearest animal that isn't Pupuce the second Kerubim takes his eyes off him] [smiles]

I'm insane.

He is late. A likely thing for Joris Jurgen to be.

He came here. He saw a baby. He was like "aww. cute baby."

His nails.... This panel is the singular reason why I draw him with painted nails a lot, just so you know. Anyway.

Nobody expected him to come. And it makes no sense that he came, because he kind of barely knows these people. He is so fond of Yugo it's crazy.

He looks a bit taken aback by the fact he was seen being cute with a baby + that someone noticed that he is there (atypical) and happy that he came.

I think Joris has a very parasocial friendship with Yugo where he says nothing and just fucking stands there silently and menacingly, but is insanely fond of Yugo internally (I think he Projects onto Yugo. Yugo is just like him fr).

The casual way he just stands as Grougal sets him on fire. The way Yugo stares in horror. The way Joris just stands there, on fire, afterwards. I am going to cry from laughing.

Also, Amalia cares about him... I'm insane.

Adamai saying this combination of words to, out of all the people in the world that he could have said this to, Joris Crepin-Jurgen. Because he's scared that Grougal could have offended him...

Once again, this entire scene is so funny I'm actually going to fucking die.

He's so sweet... He really is like an awkward uncle who has no idea how to interact with kids when he visits them once in a while, but is happy to see them nevertheless.

Also, once again, his asocial nature and avoidance of close social bonds is called out. He's insane about Yugo and Adamai. They're just like him fr, y'know? (I bet he seldom visited Amalia's birthdays, and never came to Eva's... I'm insane about this man.)

Also, a small note: pay attention to the bag he is looking through. Here's why:

The fact that he kept an entire fishing pole in that bag makes me believe that Joris owns a haven bag.

Yes, literally nobody except for me cares about details like this, but let me have this.,

Also, I wish we could see his face as he gives this to Yugo. He's probably feeling shy about this. This is probably taking physical effort.

I blame this manga for making me care about the friendship between Khan and Joris even a little. fgsgsdfgsdfgsdfg

Clown-to-clown communication, clown-to-clown conversation.

As cute as it could have been, I really doubt Joris contributed to this gift.

It seems that nobody who was involved in the planning of the party was sure he would come, and when he did, he gave a singular gift to Yugo seperately from other people.

Joris went together with Alibert to get people to safety. Cute. Also the amount of hope and trust he has in Jiva is also cute.

Bontarian war criminal solidarity?

Awooga hummina hummina hummina weewoooweeewooo.

He's so cute.... Also, "Joris runs up towers" counter is up at 3. Yes, I count this as a tower.

[you can see my commentary actively degenerating due to my insanity] He is so handsome and so cute...

IM INSANE. IM CRAZEEEH. INSANE. ASYLUM.

Here are two panels that have the prettiest man in the world in them. The cute little fist clench...

[the-rollerchloster]

Parasocial relationships are strange. Parasocial relationships in a fandom like this one can be even stranger.

I want to preface this by saying that everyone is entitled to their feelings, and feelings are sometimes completely irrational. I am also aware that sometimes our feelings are driven by incomplete thoughts, and have a tendency to overwhelm us and those around us before we can process them. In saying that, I have seen a lot of conflicting emotions and reactions to the reveal that Misha Collins has a "serious" girlfriend (and a large cock apparently, but that is a whole other thing), and I know I shouldn't be surprised by it, but part of me is.

There was a conversation in my discord server over the complicated feelings people have about this news. As a cockles-friendly space this was to be expected, as any new development in the lives of either half of JenMish often spurs these kinds of conversations, but as it started to get emotional I was thanked for bringing some perspective. I hope that I can help anyone who also needs a different way of viewing this situation by making this post, while also helping myself to organise my own chaotic and complicated thoughts.

As I understand it, during the It Seemed Like A Good Idea At The Time event at this weekend's Burbank convention, Misha told a fun anecdote about gift-giving with his new girlfriend and her daughter, wherein Misha got some things delivered to said girlfriend directly from Amazon, and girlfriend wrapped them for the daughter including what she thought was a microphone but was actually another similarly shaped item not intended for children at all. He continued to say that this "microphone" was for his girlfriend so she wouldn't need to go searching elsewhere for intimacy, as they are currently living in separate states. Now, I was not at the event, and the lack of recordings (recording was strictly prohibited, so if you've got one shame on you, I don't want to know about it!) means that everything I will ever know about this story and the way it was told to the small audience who were lucky enough to be able to attend this event comes as a form of the Telephone game, and therefore lacks a whole lot of body language, tone and context. We, as a fandom, have been severely burnt by this kind of missing nuance before - think DenverCon'21 - and it's these kinds of kneejerk reactions that have the potential to spiral out of control and limit the things we get told at future events - think bishagate.

Think for a second about your personal perception of Misha Collins. He's chaotic, he can be a little self-deprecating or self-effacing, he likes to turn serious anecdotes into jokes. He is also a passionate and caring man, who has a lot of respect and appreciation for his fans. Think about the way he tells anecdotes at standard con panels - it's often a bit tongue-in-cheek, a bit sarcastic, a bit exaggerated - so why would his behaviour at this event, which was specifically set up for Misha to tell stories he wouldn't normally have the space to do in a convention setting, be any different?

I am going to go through my thoughts on some of the things I have seen mentioned about what this all means…

First off, the elephant in the room, what does this mean for Cockles? To me, absolutely nothing. Whatever Jensen and Misha have going on completely transcends a standard sexual and/or romantic relationship. Misha was in his relationship with Vicki for the majority of his life, including when he met Jensen, and we all know she literally wrote a book on polyamory; his perception of relationships is literally shaped and moulded by this, and it's not something he's going to just switch off. Danneel has been a permanent fixture in the cockles dynamic this entire time as well. The JenMish panel at Burbank this weekend will hopefully alleviate any of the doubt anyone is having here, and give us some knowledge that regardless of how Misha defines his relationship status, things will continue in the same chaotic, loving and ridiculous nature we've become accustomed to.

Which segues nicely into the implication that the vibrator was purchased so she wouldn't stray, and therefore their relationship is monogamous. See above thoughts about tongue-in-cheek, exaggerated and self-effacing - when I imagine him telling this story, I see that cheeky, gummy grin going the whole time. Without the nuance of watching this unfold, I think we are all safest to assume that this was a joke, not a firm declaration that he has left his polyamorous attitudes behind.

On thoughts of him "moving on too soon" from his marriage and subsequent divorce, this is where my own feelings get complicated as well, but also where we need to remember that the key feature of a parasocial relationship is that we only see and know what he wants us to. We don't actually know what the trigger for that dissolution was, so in terms of the actual calendar timing it might seem soon, but emotional development and change doesn't run on a standard calendar. We don't know how long the process was before the decision was made to separate. I am currently working through a messy separation, and while I can pinpoint the decision to somewhere in the past 6-12 months, my marriage has realistically been dead for 3+ years, and we're a (supposedly) monogamous couple. As a poly couple, I can imagine that Misha and Vicki worked through every alternative option possible before landing on the decision to formally separate, and had probably well and truly been through the mourning period before it was even all over. Adult relationships are complex at the best of times, and no one ever truly knows what is happening in them except the people involved. I also think that as a man who is nearing 50 and just come out of very long term relationship, that he doesn't actually know how to be "alone", nor does he want to…

Lastly, for some of us, this is someone important in our lives who has found happiness in another person when perhaps we don't have that for ourselves. When those feelings hit, they can be extremely disheartening, and I want to send all my loving thoughts to anyone who falls into this category. It's difficult when the envy turns your stomach in knots and then your thoughts spiral into all the things wrong that mean that no matter how much you want to you can't just be happy for someone. Love and life are complicated, human beings are complicated, society is complicated. There is this hugely widespread and toxic mentality that we are all raised on that says we are halves of something that is destined to find our other half in order to feel whole, and it's utter bullshit. We shouldn't need one singular significant other to feel complete, and sometimes we get so determined to find that someone that we end up sacrificing ourselves to make them fit. (see also; Daniel Sloss' thoughts on this subject in his stand-up special Jigsaw)

There are many different kinds of love, many different kinds of relationships, and many different kinds of people. If anyone proves that to us, it's Misha Collins. He is walking evidence that human life is chaotic and unpredictable and indeterminate and we can make our own fucking rules. I hope that we can collectively be respectful of him, no matter what (or who) he chooses, and feel grateful for everything he trusts us enough to share.

[valeriianz]

For the fic writer asks:

4. Obviously you did research for BitB. I'd love you to ramble about it if you like I'm sure you've got STORIES

5. Did you outline it?

7. How'd you decide it would be Hob's pov?

25-27 I'd love to know a/some favorite lines, details, and any lore you might want to share

omg TJ what wonderful questions! thank you!! this is going to get LONG!

4: Rambling about research!

do you wanna see a screen shot of my bookmarks under my "band au" folder?

man, and that's only what could fit on the screen.

there is... SO MUCH i chose to ignore for this fic. ideas that i had to drop, lines or extra details about the other band members equipment. more logistics, what Lucienne actually does, what Mervyn has to put up with as the new touring stage manager... i realized very early on that i couldn't possibly cram all this (super cool and eye opening) information into the fic and still keep reader's interest and, most importantly, to not stray away from the fact that this is a dreamling fic. whenever i felt myself getting carried away with a side character or job or even social media numbers, gossip, outside POVs, i had to reign myself in and get back on track. there will be time for exploring everything i missed in side stories after BitB is finished. i just hope i still have the energy to write it all.

once, i was so deep into research that after publishing chapter 2, i went into work and when my chef asked what "GA" meant on my prep list, i answered with full confidence, "general admission."

(it means "get ahead.")

the worst part of this entire writing process is im still learning new shit. i havent rewatched or read a lot of what i've saved because, to be very honest, i was feeling a little burnt out. it's why we're kinda full steam dreamling now. it's why ive been glossing over a lot of technical stuff and being vague about conversations amongst the crew/not including it at all. i don't prefer ignoring my research, but at the end of the day i want to still enjoy writing this fic and finish it. even if i can't be as descriptive and detailed and nuanced as i used to be.

5: Did you outline the fic?

(also asked by @hardly-an-escape!)

i wouldn't call what i have a proper "outline," it's more like a 20k word document filled to the brim with notes that i skim at least a dozen times while i'm writing a new chapter (being in my brain is literally hell). i live multichapter life very dangerously. i copy and paste lines or sections (always scattered, never together! augh!) that are meant to go together and plop them in a new document titled "band au ch.#" and then i structure the chapter around what i want to happen.

but to answer this question in the plainest of terms: yeah. i know exactly what's going to happen up until the very end. even if its all in my head and the only concrete shit that's written down are beats/plot points. i'll figure out the rest later!

7: How'd you decide it would be Hob's POV?

i actually never even considered writing it from Dream's POV. this was my first fic in the fandom (which is so nuts to think about lol) and writing in Dream's POV sounded so scary lol. i also just thought Hob's would be easier because i have worked a few backstage shows, back in my college years. i figured eh, i can make this work. and i loved exploring how weird and mysterious musicians can be, from a normie's POV. making Hob a fan first and having him worry about developing a parasocial relationship... it was fun to explore.

25: Share your favorite line

oh god, i have so many haha.

“What are you thinking about?” starting in ch.2 and onward lmao

“It’s–” Dream laughs quietly, bitterly. “I don’t like change.” He says each word with emphasis, eyes trailing down to fixate somewhere past Hob. “And I still hold onto the things I can control, like my instruments–” his eyes swing up to regard Hob apologetically. “Or my clothes or my–” he brings a hand up and wiggles his fingers around his head. “My hair.” ch.4

"His majesty is pleased." ch.5

“You are obsessive,” he states, slow and cool and with a quiet smile cracking through his composure. “Just like me.” ch.7

“You look good.” Hob has to lean in to say so, unwilling to raise his voice amongst the roar of the fans. ch.11

“Del looks like porcelain, but she’s actually made of steel.” Desire swirls the contents of their glass before pushing their shoulders back with a deep breath. “She's tougher than all of us.” ch.11

“Everything. I want…” his fingers tighten in Hob’s hair, pulling him closer, speaking against his lips. “…Everything.” ch.14

26: Share your favorite detail

how intentionally coy Dream behaves. i love keeping him a mystery and deciding when and how much to allow his intentions to peek through has been so fun lol.

Despair is in fact covered in tattoos and piercings! i say this because i feel like sometimes i forget lmao. (but also her and Hob don't interact much so. my bad haha).

Delirium's constant explosion of color in the way she dresses <3

Hob's dedication to his job, Dream, and the people he cares about the most. i don't care if people think i'm making him too soft and good, im gonna project on that man and make him a sweet, sweet simp lmao

and ah, this doesn't matter anymore, and i kinda regret doing it but. i originally had Dream's favorite bass all black but the pickguard was white. so it actually looked like Jessamy. not gonna lie when @designtheendless drew it all black i decided i liked it better that way. and truly i do. that's when i went back to ch.1 and changed it haha. to actually see the guitar with Dream, all done up sparkling black and purple flecks... gosh it's just so him. but then i got up to the reveal that the guitar's name was Jessamy and i was like, "oh, right." lmao. no one seems to care so i'll leave it be.

27: Share a piece of lore you made up for the story

i have a lot lmao. and this post is already so long... im hoping i can get to some if not all of it in side fics in the future. but for now, here's some that's more like headcanons but:

Dream hates flying. he can full on go into panic attacks on the plane if he allows himself to get into his own head.

this was mentioned briefly in ch.4, while Dream was discussing the formation of the band, but Despair was in another band before joining Endless. she is the only character in the fic who gets to keep her English roots (lol sorry) and is the oldest in the band (30).

all of the band members ages: Dream, Desire, and Death are all 28 and Delirium is 22.

Dream can experience subdrop after going too hard during a performance.

Dream paints his own nails, it's very therapeutic.

as an exercise, i explored my own headcanons for Dream in this verse in a word doc, and one thing i will share from it that you might find interesting: If I were to ever give Dream a theological values, I would describe him as a satanist. He is a physical and pragmatic person, nonconforming, and although he is introverted, he enjoys being a part of a community (he loves his band).

also found this in my notes: How Desire and Dream got along was Death making them fight it out. Hob raises an eyebrow “like in a brawl?” He couldn't imagine Desire throwing hands. “No, in a pillow fight that escalated in hair pulling and verbal taunts.”

fic writer asks

[bl00dlight]

about people who think you're unfair when it comes to depicting aemond... are just delusional who mayhaps read aemond x reader or fanfictions or some headcanons... aemond is and will always be a villainous person, when he was a kid he wanted to bash the head of his nephew with a rock ( this resulting in him losing an eye and he deserves it, sorry nog sorry ) + his pursue for powers will be his well-deserved downfall. he's a raging misognist like the rest of the entire family, like... aww he is crying when helaena bluntly tells him the truth ? hope he'll rot with his guilt. you are totally right, he's a piece of shit and i can't wait to see his demise.

I mean AHAHAHAHAHHAHA. Speak your truth diva.

Look I love Aemond. Okay... let me just say.

BUT, yes no you're right like. He is fucking awful and the worst. And I do want to see him rot with his guilt a little, especially what he did to Helaena. Like I love him, and I understand him. And I do feel sympathy for him.

If I was Helaena would I have have said yes before he'd been finished his sentence? Yes. Would I have girl bossed it and proposed to him like Rhaenyra did to Daemon? Yes. Would I hypothetically let this fictional man suck and fuck on me?.... undeniably. Is this a parasocial relationship? Yes.

But it's undeniable that so many girlies on here fucking act like tradwives defending their right wing, MRA adjacent, wife beating man. Like you can want to cook him dinner and also call him out for genocide. Really gets me concerned about... well... how some of yall interact with men irl. A man like Aemond irl, is an incel.

Someone said this on reddit about the balcony scene, that it was like when an incel goes up to his crush to try and get her to be on his side before he shoots up a school. And AHAHHA exactly.

They act as if Aemond is indeed a victim through and through, who has done no wrong and is a sweetypie. And is it self insert fluff fics fault? Yes it is. People are attracted to Ewan... and their idea of Aemond. Not really Aemond as he is. And many don't want to interact with analysis of his character. Which is fine. No hate, you do you. But it is a problem when others make it fans like myself, problem.

And as someone with a disorganised attachment style? As someone who upon watching the Harry Potter series as a child who had their sexual awakening upon seeing both Draco and Luicus Malfoy. As someone who has been a Sharpay Evans defender since it came out and as someone who agreed with Rosalie Cullen that Bella was a boring ass... whiny as bitch....

I gotta say? Mean, evil and toxic platinum blondes? I'm here for them and I love them. And I am basically attracted to Aemonds character/interested in him because of the fact he is a fucking asshole. Okayyyy soooooo. Don't get me wrong I love the idea of soft, vunerable Aemond. But I can only love that because it's a rare thing for him. Because he's main mode is acting like a horror movie villain. I've always been about that life of loving dark characters. It seems many upon here are just... well... they find him hot and wanna smash. Which is valid. But it's not valid to project your personal sexual/romantic fantasies onto other fans who are just... discussing canon characteristics of Aemond.

And even reddit neckbeards do it to because they relate to Aemond. They'll swear he was this valiant, dutiful, scorned boy. They'll swear he wasn't a Valyrian supremacist. They'll swear he would never hurt or betray his family. But it's like? So basically how the fuck does someone campaign for the fucking third reich *House Strong Edition* be day and be a loving family man by night who would never betray his family if he felt abandoned/humiliated or hurt by them? So you know... the fanboys who thump the book like it's the bible also are FUCKING ANNOYING.

It's actually crazy.

[nicromancytarot]

so how did you manage to find the exact name of your spouse thats quite cool!

It’s a long story in all honesty. 2022 I liked this guy, and I stumbled across pick a cards on YouTube, I watched one about my future spouse and it mentioned some specific things that unfortunately for 2022 me did not add up with the guy I liked. At the end of 2022 I interacted with my future spouse unknowingly, and he’s always been under my nose which sounds insane and creepy at the same time. My friend sent me a video of him in 2021 and I had no idea who he was, I used an audio of him on tiktok in 2022 and still hasn’t a clue of his existence, even as far back to 2020 when I saw him on youtube and vowed to never watch his content ‼️

He’s somewhat in the influencing space if you can’t already tell (I’ll keep his name private for the sake of both of our privacies and timing, since obviously things can change) so I didn’t think much of it. Then mid 2023 I got back into Tarot and pick a cards, I was feeling really demotivated so I decided to watch some about my future spouse again, same thing as always happens, I put two and two together and was like “oh, hang on a minute” then bro got semi cancelled and I was onto bigger and greater things, hoping Louis Partridge was my husband instead 😔

I always felt verrrry drawn to this person no matter what and it pissed me off cus this was my era of loving Miguel Ohara and wishing that he was real, but it was spoiled by this man being on my mind. So around 5 months later I got back into his content (very loosely) and I was a tad more content with him being my future spouse.

I then started learning more about astrology, he hasn’t got many chart analysis posts about him as he’s not mainstream or anything, but the ones that he does have, the “soulmate” ones weirdly describe me and it’s creepy, because it makes me feel parasocial, I only know one other person with a “famous” future spouse so I don’t really know how to feel about it, since there’s so many unsuspecting, but it’s weird to know who you’re going to marry.

Another thing I should probably say is that my spirit guides don’t hide much from me anymore, the start of 2023 they gave me a blob of information about the universe and how it works and all these things about the afterlife (which again, makes me sound psycho, so I don’t speak about it) I’m writing a book on it, have been for the last year, it’s definitely going to be a lot when I one day release it lmao, but because of them telling me all this stuff, they don’t really care to hide my future spouse’s identity for me, I think they figured that it will motivate me to actually get my ass up and become who I want to become so we can meet.

But going back to the astrology, I was told by my spirit guides via pendulum that I was going to meet him at 21, that was told to me October last year, December last year I was looking through our astrology transits, we both have a 5th house (love and relationships) transit on November 24th 2026, 14 days after my 21st birthday. So that was certainly confirmation lmao. His 7th house ruler (where you could meet) in astrocartography goes over the country I live in, and my 7th house ruler also goes over that place too, so again, very strange.

During my October pendulum time, I spoke with one of my great grandparents who had a specific message for me, and she proceeded to spell out his name, so that’s how I know that lmao.

I’ve done so many readings on it since because it does make you feel absolutely, incredibly insane and possibly out of your mind, and they’ve always added up. I did a “how he’s going to meet his future spouse” and then mine, they added up too much, it was terrifying (bro feels rejected by me, L) and I also asked for confirmation a few nights later for just a single sign that he is indeed my future spouse, I pulled AT THE SAME TIME the lovers and two of cups, I genuinely sobbed when I realised I could’ve recorded it, it’s the craziest thing that’s happened to me in Tarot I swear.

I also received a few readings since during exchanges and games where people have straight up confirmed that he is who I think he is. So hopefully we both make the right decisions to be together in the end, it’s definitely not an opportunity I plan on missing out on.

I can’t lie, knowing your future spouse is hard, especially if they’re somewhat someone you look up to, I’m not necessarily a “fan” of him, I don’t really interact with his content anymore, I haven’t really done so since early 2023, but I feel guilty for not doing so now as of who he is to me, and who he shall be. I constantly have doubts about it, my guides get pissed off at me all the time because I’m always asking for confirmation or searching for something, but really all I know now is that if I make all the right choices, and he does too, then we will become what we will be, but for now I guess I feel isolated in that.

I won’t get into the whole negative side of knowing your future spouse, unless some asks me to lmao, it’s certainly too much for this already too long rant.

Thank you for coming to my ted talk xoxo

[ingravinoveritas]

cloud-based-and-rainpilled replied to your post: 

Someone mentioned in a comment that Michael got ‘downgraded’ to boyfriend, so my tinfoil (again, could be wrong/insane) is that AL & GT referring to each other as wifey is to downplay the previous MS ‘wife’ jokes, since people keep commenting about a poly thing going on, moreso than the past. Also since MS is in London rn, he’s with DT more, so I think there’s a bit of insecurity going on. a lot of (doomed) poly couples have an ‘out of sight, out of mind’ rule, or think the swinging being gay 'doesn't count/isn't a threat,' which could be why the posts feel forced. (parasocial, creepy, bad person, etc., whatever, I calls it as I sees it and have seen it before 🤷‍♀️ )

lepqueen replied to your post: 

My biggest question on this was actually about the song choice, given that I am reasonably sure Sting said at some point Every Breath You Take is a stalker song.

@cloud-based-and-rainpilled I had a similar thought about the insecurity. I think Georgia and AL trying so hard to give the appearance of everything being "fine" and everyone getting along only makes it feel more like things in reality are not exactly what's being presented on social media. I personally did not see "boyfriend" as a downgrade (because from my perspective, "other wife" reads as more jokey/unserious, but boyfriend is...softer, somehow), but I can see why some folks could interpret it as a downgrade when it's actually a readjusting of whatever the dynamic is between all of them.

Going back to the insecurity, I had also wondered how things would play out while Michael was in London for such a long time during the run of Nye, and it makes all the sense in the world that things would change with Michael and David being able to see each other in person frequently. And you make a salient point about the gay swinging being seen as less threatening (which I think is why it's been easy for Georgia and AL to start up with that, and why we have never seen even one reference to David/Anna or Michael/Georgia and swinging). It could be that shipping Michael and David was also seen as less threatening and easier to play along with a few years ago, when it was all still new and Michael and David hadn't gotten as close as they have now. So yes, I do think something has changed, and though we may never be privy to what specifically, we can still see its aftereffects and reverberations in a variety of ways.

(I also wish the antis/people making vitriolic posts in the tags would understand your final point, which is that some of us have seen these things before and are speaking from a place of experience--unlike their assertions (and I have actually seen someone say this) that we have never had any close friendships or relationships like these, and therefore know nothing.)

To your comment, @lepqueen, I also found myself raising an eyebrow at the song choice. You are correct that Sting has described the song as being creepy, and I found one quote from him in particular attesting to this:

I'm not really sure how this fits into the context of AL's post, though, or what made her choose it. Is the David pillow watching her every move? Is she watching the pillow? I have no idea. But that was certainly a choice, so there you go...

[mecachrome]

extremely 👀👀 about this kind/nice spectrum u brought up and how alex oscar lando and anyone else on the grid are placed on the grid..... would love to know more.........

hi there!!! :D omg yes i would love to talk more about this, though of course disclaimer that these are my Personal Interpretations and i love to spout nonsense on the internet LOL. i'll just expand on oscar + lando + alex some more since frankly i don't know all the other driver lore Like That and i don't want to overstep in my analysis! also i'm deathly afraid of chirlies. ok let's move on

to start off... i think the way we talk about celebrity personas obviously requires some generalization + projection since we can only extrapolate what is already being consciously disseminated, and so although i frequently talk about the kind/nice dichotomy or someone's capacity for sympathy vs. empathy (which is kind of a parallel assessment imo) we are of course all complex people who contain multitudes, and i think it's mostly just interesting to examine strictly in the context of racing & racing mentality... if that makes sense!

also wrt landoscar's personalities → one thing i feel very, VERY strongly about despite their differing surface-level interests and social profiles (read: different flavors of off-track sports, both of them being gamers but to diverging levels of visibility, lando's higher degrees of hyperfixation, etc.) is that at their baseline they are extremely similar people, and honestly even very similar drivers and racing "characters," which ultimately kind of colors most of my analysis. if we peel back the layers then oscar and lando are both functional introverts who've been very well-nurtured by similarly robust, persisting, and loyal support systems—oscar spending 99% of his time off-track with his longtime gf, lando's best mates all being from his karting days, their dads being equally objective about yet also supportive of their careers, jon having trained lando since he was like 5 feet tall, etc.—so to me the overarching difference is that they have diametric approaches to how they externalize their convictions, and then obviously since that's what we see/hear day in & day out it generates the existing rift between their media images. per lando on btg: 

"Oscar is extremely down to earth. A bit like me, just a very normal guy who's in Formula 1, just a guy that loves to drive cars and compete against people, and that's it."

(incoming egregious amounts of lando psychoanalysis...) despite oscar being the only driver i truly rep, i've always found lando's psyche soooo fascinating because he invites such extreme emotion in people (be it positive or negative), and i think part of it does go back to the idea of being nice vs. kind and ultimately the lens through which his intentions are interpreted by other people. in real-people fandom this is always interesting since it ends up becoming an unconscious exercise in how we perceive "sincerity" in others, even though the underlying paradoxical truth is obviously that any such assessment must always be dispersed and consolidated via a parasocial system (and thus everything is held relative to our own individual value systems... This is totally not the point of the ask. SORRY FOR THE MILLION TANGENTS) anyway as an extremely disillusioned sports fan i actually have a lot of time for lando despite how much visceral judgment he generates in quite a few people, which is totally fair since everyone is fully privy to feeling however they want to feel about any celebrity and i am not here to convince them otherwise lol. but that's just me!

i think to me the thing about lando is that there is almost zero pretense to his character, which some dislike because they find his bluntness off-putting, but imo just means his intentions are generally straightforward and easily digestible. sure, he lacks the spoken filter to not come off as occasionally callous, but at the end of the day i genuinely believe that he's an inherently thoughtful (and "kind") person, especially within the insular system of professional motorsport and the many mental pitfalls that accompany it. a symptom of this is how willing he is to resist more gracious media responses and how very inwardly critical he can be in specifically self-motivating ways, the latter of which sometimes gets misinterpreted due to the rigid yet overwhelmingly popular framework of what constitutes a competitive racing mentality. but like... to Me, lando is just entirely what you see is what you get, bad parts included, and he has zero intention of making excuses for that or pretending to be anything otherwise. which i enjoy!

and which again also goes back to the idea of niceness. (honestly the tl;dr for most of lando's pr scandals is just Oh okay so it's illegal to be neurodivergent now? but i'm trying to be normal so let me not just say that.) a good example is the entire debacle of saying he felt no sympathy for daniel at mclaren in 2022, because i think it elucidates a sort of kindness in objectivity that he very plainly participates in—to lando, being a top-performing athlete means never searching for excuses to soften the brunt of one's failures, himself included, and equally that there is no point playing sorry in front of journalists or trying to reshape their narrative scrutiny since at the highest level of competition any bold-faced externalization of "sympathy" is really just pity. and what point is there in telling someone else that you Feel Bad for their skill issue/struggles when the moment you extend that sentiment you essentially debase their position as a direct competitor and therefore disrespect them even more?

"I want to be the best in the world, I want to prove myself to people. But I've never had the mentality or the confidence to say that or feel like I need to do anything more than normal to show it to people. Do I have to do anything to go over the top and show that to prove it? I don't think so. People say you've got to be brutal and you've got to have this certain mentality. But I just don't think it's true at all. I think you’ve just got to get in the car and do the best you can."

i think the Separation of Church (treating everyone exactly as they are on-track, just another car to size up or keep at bay) and State (being friendly, supportive, and altogether well-regarded by other drivers off-track) is a primary tenet of lando's personality, and it's something he achieves by valuing kindness over niceness. you know the lando/maxf quadrant interview where lando is like: i'm not friends with you because of your achievements in life... i just care about your personality! and he's mainly saying it to take the piss out of him but he also 100% does mean that shit. that's the crasyinsane part about lando to me... god i'm so sorry i need to not go on for a million years but PERSONALLY, i think lando is very much the type of person who can go through an experience, or otherwise see someone close to him go through an experience, and approach it very empathetically to the point he continues carrying on this internal conviction about it even when he's survived or grown past it. like even as someone who mostly believes in Death to Relatable Marketing, i find it really interesting when lando talks about mental health in sports because we get to see both a) the fact that he's grown so much in his own mental resilience from his rookie self in 2019 to who he is now, but also b) that he continues to believe strongly in rejecting the presumed archetype of a successful formula 1 driver, and is steadfast in surfacing that even though... honestly? lando nowadays is a very consistent, well-rounded, and efficient talent who frankly doesn't experience nearly as much of the unproductive mentally-spiraling self-criticism that used to impact his performances to a far more pronounced degree when he was younger and rough around the edges. yet he still feels compelled to affirm that there is No One way to be an athlete (which is significant because "mentality" is such a harped-on concept in all sports, and everyone is always trying unfailingly to extrapolate performance-related projections via vague and completely subjective intangibles to a notably unempirical degree!!) because he does care, deeply, about how people enter and succeed in motorsport. honestly i always feel kind of iffy bringing up commentary re: Women In Motorsport because it often sounds unnecessarily adulatory, but at least in recent times i think he's also shown a decent amount of grace when talking about female fans, girls in karting, that one time he was like Bruh who are you? @ that misogynistic reporter, which...... i'm not going to say majorly influences my opinion of him, but imo being willing to quickly shut someone down like that is an anti-niceness to a productive end that i appreciate, since i think many personalities would kind of just smile bemusedly and try to quickly move on in the conversation.

tl;dr lando thinks feeling bad for people is useless and will never give you that one tidy sympathetic soundbite, but he does care for people vividly, especially off-track, which to him is the only place kindness really matters anyway. when you look at maxf (and i know this is mainly a portrait of codependency unique to their friendship but i do think it reflects his love languages in general) whose career cratered because he mentally couldn't handle the pressure, lando's response was literally to unfailingly engage in failcore househusband chores for him like leaving handwritten notes in his 3rd grade girl handwriting and ironing his clothes on stream........ which... i could go on forever but again. separation of church and state!!!

anyway with oscar on the other hand, i honestly think most things in his life kind of just exist as a function of motorsport LOL. and that he likes surrounding himself with people of similar interests/intellectual level/skillsets, down to his partner studying engineering and wanting to work in the same industry as him....... again, i think 814's baseline characters are Very similar and that they're both great team players with complementary professional approaches, so this is not a knock on either of their personalities, but imo lando is just generally more outwardly sentimental and has also had to do a lot of conscious growing up in the past ~4 years to become more well-rounded wrt off-track interests, whereas oscar basically came onto the grid as this already fully-realized product with far fewer dependencies who is just nonchalantly like, I see my family 3 weeks a year and my sisters just think i'm their lame older brother and don't care about my career at all, but i'm fine with that and i'd make all the same sacrifices i've made over and over again to get where i am!!! also re: oscar's abject lack of interest in engaging with fans one-on-one, an easy example is how lando genuinely values/treasures the friendship bracelets he gets and wears them consistently whereas oscar is just like. Erm. i respect it but that is not for me ✋😭 he's nice about fan things because he understands how much fan support and consumerist interest enable the circus that is formula 1 but he doesn't really value any of it much past the surface-level pleasantries......

why is this answer so long............... idk if you want to hear anything more about alex but i think he's very similar to oscar in terms of this measured external niceness/quiet ruthlessness, especially wrt how they weather team politics, interact with media (noted red bull marketing hater alex albon), and tend to simply Do The Thing To Do The Thing. alex is especially interesting because if you watch his high performance pod it reveals sooooo much of his growth over the years and his current mental framework ("i was having to be selfless, and it didn't really agree with me that much") and frankly even just the way he speaks about himself is fascinating to me but i digress!!! i do think much of lando's tactless impulse yet also apparent kindness comes from his considerably privileged background and the fact that he was shown a lot of Realistic But Also Unconditional Support and thus never had his career actively threatened growing up. so even though he's had to learn to not mentally catastrophize at the f1 level, he didn't undergo the reckoning alex did with his mother/losing rb's team backing/etc., which alex mentions in this podcast as specifically triggering his insatiable desperation to prove himself.......... and so on. alex and oscar to me are both quite similar in how they let more combative thoughts simmer and are very well-trained in responding palatably to the media, but they're also going to resist relating themselves too much to other people's struggles because That Is Not Their Problem, and at the end of the day oscar is uh.... sure he has a lot of appreciation for mclaren and has called prema a family before, but he really only wants to win for himself and is less inclined than lando is to romanticize the spirit of the Team. and so when he says things like "for me, there’s just not any point, especially in self-deprecation, destroying yourself in front of the media," it's a Niceness because his assessments are always entirely self-absorbed in the most productive of senses, as in he truly only cares about what he himself is doing and is never going to waste time worrying about or comparing himself to his competitors' mental approaches!

does any of this make sense. please excuse the monstrous rambling 😭 but also please feel free to follow up with your own takes/lore about any driver if you'd like to, or to tell me that i'm absolutely wrong if you'd like, because i always love to hear about these things!!! :3c

[hxhhasmysoul]

Did u see these posts: https://linkspooky.tumblr.com/post/744136721881530368/hello-friend-i-thought-id-use-your-post-as-a . https://linkspooky.tumblr.com/post/744086250489774080/so-i-was-genuinely-surprised-last-week-when-we ? Honestly, I think am starting to dislike the Megumi & Killua comparisons more than I ever maybe did the Killua & Gojo ones (like I also saw a comment saying Megumi is smarter than Killua, and I don't think Megumi is dumb, but like how?). I'm not saying Megumi is a bad character, but he is not (imo) better-written or have a better arc than Killua (who has one of the best arcs ever).

P.S: Off topic from me complaining about Killua getting compared to JJK characters (which I was mostly neutral towards doing, but now, I might be becoming a bit less neutral). Great and pretty Palm, LeoPika, and Illumi's art u just reblogged!

The biggest problem with what that person writes is the value judgement. I don’t necessarily disagree with the stuff they say about Megumi, at least they see that Gojou forced Megumi into being a sorcerer and that’s rare. They also seem to acknowledge Megumi’s character flaws, even if I don’t exactly agree with every argument they make about him. And I especially don’t agree with how they compare Tsumiki to Alluka. 

They are right that Megumi tries to use others, Tsumiki and then Yuuji as justifications for his existence. And it’s true Killua uses the people he loves as a crutch because he has no goals of his own, because all his life the goals of others were forced onto him and he’s really lost at the beginning of HxH. 

The difference is that Killua’s relationships with Gon, Alluka and Nanika are very deep, he also grows close with others: Ikalgo, Palm, Bisky and Leorio, there’s clear potential for him developing a friendship with Canary. Killua also projects to some extent onto Gon, and onto Alluka too. But that’s something everyone does. Killua does it to a normal extent, the Gon in Killua’s mind is partially imagined and greatly coloured by Killua’s crush, but Killua quite often actually understands how Gon feels, or accurately reads the situation between them. The things he tells Gon don’t make Gon worse because they feed into Gon’s issues.

He does enable Gon, and he doesn't know how to help Gon after Kite's death, but his presence still helps Gon in those moments. He doesn't make gon better but he doesn't make him worse either, they are just two kids who are in a situation that's just too much for them to handle.

When Killua tries to enforce what he thinks is best onto Alluka and Nanika, Alluka puts him in his fucking place and he very clearly understands what he did wrong. Because he’s capable of seeing Alluka as a real person, he can see past the image of Alluka that exists in his head. 

Megumi’s relationships with Tsumiki and Yuuji are superficial, bordering on parasocial. The things Megumi tells Yuuji make Yuuji contract Megumi’s cog mentality. Megumi acts like he knows shit, how he's very smart and Yuuji buys into that, because Megumi reads a lot and knows long words. And Megumi also buys into that, and thinks he can talk with authority about who's to blame for what. Or which people deserve to be saved.

Megumi barely spends time with Yuuji in an active way, he just passively tags along and frowns and sighs, and he downright rejects Tsumiki and everything she stood for when she was conscious. He’s upset that Yuuji lashes out at Hana because Yuuji is mourning Nobara so fucking deeply. Megumi is taken aback because he never mourned Nobara, he never tried to get close to her, but more importantly, despite him thinking he cares about Yuuji, he has absolutely no clue how Yuuji is feeling. He projects his own idea as to who Yuuji is onto Yuuji. Yuuji the good selfless person who needs to be protected by Megumi but not engaged with, not reached out to. He has no idea who Yuuji really is or how he feels, nor does Megumi care. He never cared what Tsumiki felt or who she really was, and the whole situation with the bridge showed very clearly that Tsumiki led a life of her own and Megumi didn’t even know, and likely it wasn’t a completely pure and uwu life. But to Megumi what matters are his own made up versions of these two people. 

And this is actually okay, these are flaws and they are a consistent characterisation. I don’t like Megumi much but I will defend his right to be flawed, I will defend him from all the Gojou fans who pretend Gojou didn’t make a child soldier out of a little kid. Or who pretend that it isn’t clear that Gojou left Tsumiki and Megumi to fend for themselves in their daily life and just borrowed Megumi to force him to work so the two kids had a place to live and other necessities. And I will defend Megumi from anyone who tries to deny him his right to a fucking mental breakdow.

But what they write about Killua is extremely shallow, the mentions of Gon and Yuuji, and the paragraph about Maki, those are downright upsetting. They show very clearly that they will write whatever needed to prop up their fav. And I really don’t get what drives people to do this kinda stuff.

They honestly undermine their arguments (some very solid) about how nice Megumi’s arc is, because they can’t just argue their case. No, they need to bring another character into it and attack that character. It’s always a foolish thing to do. I get that they might not like Killua as much or think he’s overrated. But Killua was not needed for their argument. Everything they get wrong about Killua weakens their arguments about Megumi. And Killua’s relationships with his close ones really highlight the issue with Megumi’s. And the person never addresses that. 

I think I’ve seen maybe their posts or similar posts about Megumi, not exactly comparing him to Killua, but for example posts about how he’s the true MC of JJK, where Megumi’s fans argued about how complex Megumi is and how there’s nothing to Yuuji. And this person’s posts are just written to prop up Megumi by dismissing and discrediting other characters. 

The JJK fandom is vicious to most characters that aren’t sexymen. Megumi is much more liked in the fandom than Yuuji, but yeah, one can consider him disliked if one compares him to how people are about Gojou, Getou, Nanami, Touji, Chousou, Higuruma, Sukuna or even Kusakane, Shu and Ino. Also as they rightly notice Megumi isn’t overpowered so he gets a lot of shit, something Yuuta never gets. As to Maki, this person clearly doesn’t give a shit about her, so not only they very clearly didn’t pay attention to Maki post Mai’s death, they also have no idea what the fandom says about Maki. 

They also write as if the way the fandom treats Megumi is unique, when Yuuji gets that far more and over everything. Even Sukuna got that just because in the battle of JJK sexymen, Gojou truly is the strongest and his fans are fucking rabid and allergic to canon and the text of JJK. 

Gege’s love for HxH somehow creates the need in the JJK fans to compare the two stories and their respective characters, and I’ve never seen it done right. In this case it really just cheapens what they were trying to say.

[reflections-in-a-critical-eye]

It's time to add batch number 3 of asks and this concludes my little experiment. Unfortunately, it's not the most conclusive one and the analysis is superficial at best (I wish I had this idea when I was feeling better), but I'll try to write a few words.

First, the asks:

I've observed some common themes throughout all the messages I've received.

I think our opinions regarding the topic of dating and what we think of these idols is obviously influenced/determined by our cultural understandings of relationships, our gender politics and relation to our own gender because we interpret and give meaning to what we see through those frames.

Another interesting result was to see how obvious it is now that our rational arguments are so deeply connected to what is actually an emotional response that on the surface, doesn't contain much logic, but then it ends up being used as a logical argument. I would say that the fuckboy allegations about Jungkook are ilustrative of this and I'll try and explain why. Once again, this shouldn't be seen as me being judgemental or pushing my own position at the front, but merely an exploration of that response.

Calling someone a fuckboy without having any actual insight into his dating history is indeed an ilogical reaction that is not based on facts. I find that most likely comes from disappointment and that it is a label used in opposition to ideas of what people understand as commited relationships and partners. In this particular case, JK hugging a woman turned him into a fuckboy for those who used to believe in jikook as a long-term relationship, while those who were not exactly shippers were influenced by their already formed opinion of JK as more of a superficial person.

It doesn't follow a logical train of thought, as it actually translates into frustration, anger, a difference in morals, etc. It's interesting how such words were not really found in some of the asks.

Someone said that a lot of those who sent their messages tried to rationalize their thoughts anyways, instead of focusing on their feelings. It is true, but it's also something that I expected. We tend to do that, not only for those that get to read, but also for ourselves. There is a constant need to make sense of whatever we see, we look for explanations because not knowing might be worse than the actual outcome.

I'd like to go back a bit to the fuckboy label. Would someone think the same if Jungkook was filmed in his house backhugging a man? How do we know that the woman in question was not a long-term partner? How do we know that Jungkook jumps from partner to partner, without caring about their feelings and uses them for his own gratification? Isn't that what the label implies? My point is, we don't know any of these things and yet it is a simple way for some of us to explain our disdain towards what we see. Perhaps the voyeuristic angle (looking at it through a window from outside) has had a significant contribution to these judgements. Then there is also our own bias and other feelings we might have harbored already.

In opposition to that, Jimin gets a pass a lot more which based on the responses I got, shows the difference in the way he is perceived compared to Jungkook or Tae.

As I've mentioned from the beginning, this is just a small glimpse into how we process and express what we feel in connection to some people that we've formed a parasocial relationship with. Amongst the reasons why I said early on that this will be a judgement-free zone is because I find that it is inevitable in most cases to not be affected in any way. A reveal that shows a part of someone that had been kept hidden due to industry practices and behaviors is not something that can be looked at as a mere fact, without anyone being affected by it. The secrecy nature of it can have an effect on all of us, regardless if we're happily married or not, regardless of our gender, age or if our day-to-day happiness is dependent on some idols.

[hellcatsandcars]

long post! milex inspired rambling!! you have been warned!!!

not to be That Guy but i am asking everyone who - just like myself - likes to speculate about miles and alex and their personal lives (very much far away from them so that our speculations don't make anyone uncomfortable, thank you very much) to stop for a second.

there's been a trend lately of people kind of... piling up heartbrokenness (?) on miles, and portraying a sort of break-up situation between the two of them after the end of the eycte tour. that's fair enough! lyrics interpretation can definitely be used to back those ideas, go off!

but also, since a lot of people have used the "alex was not ready to come out, they fell out as a consequence of this" trope (which again, fair enough, whatever waters your crops) i am asking you to actually stop and consider what this means with a bit of empathy.

a large part of the fanbase is queer, in whichever direction that may be. a lot of us have gone through the five stages of gay grief when we found out because, despite the bubble we create for ourselves on the internet, there are a lot of real life issues connected to queerness that we will simply have to learn to deal with. that being said, i find it sort of... mean, i guess, the way that people are using the very real issue of being torn between coming out (and the many, many consequences that follow) and maintaining a "secret" relationship, which as far as we know might have been secret only to the public. especially given the added weight of fame, i would also be very hesitant to have a relationship exposed for everyone to see, comment on, judge, or discuss like it's just another segment in the news.

alex is beyond private, as is his right. we as fans grow to have a sort of parasocial expectation of him to share facts about himself (since we may feel that we are "owed" that intimate knowledge) and we gossip about him endlessly and we pick apart every single interaction or relationship he has. if we do all this in private, and bearing in mind that it's not something we are actually in any way involved in ourselves, it's okay. i'm not dictating what people do on the internet because that'd be beyond pointless.

but please, especially if you're queer yourself: how would it feel to have a part of your life ruthlessly exposed for the world to see, slipping entirely out of your control? how would it feel to be the villain simply because you don't want to come out, or don't want to divulge private information?

this is not to say that you can't write or imagine these scenarios, but maybe try to have a bit of empathy when you do. sometimes coming out really isn't a feasible option, and there's nothing evil or cowardly about that.

[anonymous-dentist]

CW Heavy Topics

So Spiderbit angst fics are getting out of hand.

I feel like there’s a lot of angst writers in the Spiderbit fandom rn who don’t really actually get qCellbit’s perspective at all on the whole “Staying behind in Purgatory” thing. But, more importantly, there’s a lot of angst writers who don’t understand what it’s like to be suicidal or how to talk to suicidal people, because let me tell you that this line from a popular fic is NOT how you talk to a suicidal person!!

Because there are a lot of fics right now coming out from qRoier’s perspective that entirely villainize qCellbit for staying behind and use qRoier’s grief over past familial deaths to excuse character bashing and it’s legitimately fucked up because not even qRoier is doing that, and he’s the one actually affected here. Because he doesn’t know that Cellbit chose to stay behind, but we the audience do, there’s a real temptation to absolutely lay into Cellbit’s character through Roier’s mouth via fic, but all these fics are doing are bastardizing the characters and treating a suicidal character (Cellbit) as a total irredeemable monster.

Grief is a tricky thing. So is long-term suicidal depression. Trust me, I know. There’s no way to navigate it in a clean way, and the emotions involved are always going to be raw and human. It can be hard to understand these topics if you’ve never experienced them in real life or studied them extensively, which is the problem with a lot of the angst fics that have come out post-Purgatory. Because people are writing angst for the sake of angst without putting any proper care or attention into their writing, and it’s all spreading harmful ideas about mental health even if the authors don’t mean to do so.

These Spiderbit Reunion Angst fics almost all consist of Roier yelling at Cellbit about how he broke his heart and made him feel like shit by staying behind without any actual thought into how Actual qRoier would act upon hearing that Cellbit stayed behind on purpose, and these fics all end up painting Cellbit as a terrible person for wanting to die.

Like:

Bad characterization aside, the implications this paragraph has in regards to mental health are BAD. Because this implies that suicidal people can’t love, and so do almost all these post-Purgatory angst fics, and people have been getting called parasocial for calling these fics out for the harmful tropes they’re persisting, but as someone who has experienced both terrible grief and depression on this level, I’m just going to say that sometimes fiction does affect reality and people need to be really careful with how they approach these topics. These kinds of ideas are extremely harmful, especially in a fandom with a fanbase as young as this one is.

It’s always going to be messy, and that’s fine. Write messy. Just do some research first so you can present messy in a tasteful way, okay?

[neurodivergantizzetwitch]

ive been hearing a lot of legitimate criticism of will wood and his fan base from people who like his music, but see him as a pretentious white guy, and his fanbase as an extension of that.

now i havent been in the ww fandom v long, but given the depths i have gone in it i feel at least somewhat comfortable saying im not sure exactly where this impression is coming from.

i see him writing very eclectic erratic and idiosyncratic songs, and people having a variety of interpretations of them, and i can see how that might come off as pretentiousness, especially bc some of his fans really do cross a line in terms of a gatekeepy parasocial attachment to will

but i haven't really seen anyone going THIS IS THE ONLY WAY TO INTERPRET THIS SONG YOURE STUPID IF YOU DONT SEE IT or smth to that effect

i acknowledge tho that there is also some legitimate background to this perception, bc what i have seen is:

-will playing characters live and joking w his audience in ways that are often either easily misinterpreted or clearly just someone with extreme mental health issues

-will being maybe mildly annoyed at how his fans often... over analyze his songs and upset when they overstep boundaries, and sometimes expressing that in non ideal ways.

-wills fans being incredibly obsessed with him and his music, which to the outside observer can be annoying i think (but honestly this to me reads more as a bunch of nd ppl w who have hyperfixated/have a special interest related to him)

-the lyrics to wills songs all being very confusing, especially the farther back in his discography you go, and his fans acting like their meanings are obvious on a first glance even when they arent (which is all the time)

-will pulling references from sources that can be seen as pretentious and off putting, esp when coming from a white guy (taoism, it's always sunny, modern psychology, 'classic' films, name dropping authors of philosophy, etc.)

-wills stances often being contrarian and often (especially on first glance) seemingly being that way purely for the sake of being contrarian

-will explaining his stances in fancy and grandiloquent language (a note on this one in particular: i think of this as not really a sign of being pretentious, potentially bc of my own struggles w it. i often accidentally use a bunch of complicated words and descriptions that wouldn't make sense to me if i was the one hearing them, not because im trying to be exclusionary or come off as ✨intelligent✨, but bc it was explained to me in those terms and i went through the process of studying it in that terminology and being told i had to use that terminology, and now im too dumb to translate what im thinking back into language that's actually comprehensible)

but i feel that a lot of these things are really overstated in how often they happen. by and large, i think a lot of this response is a misreading of the facts that his fanbase is really passionate to a somewhat obsessive degree, will is very passionate about the things he likes and the things he believes in, and both will and the majority of his fan base are pretty mentally unstable and/or neurodivergent.

from what ive seen, will isn't trying to be pretentious in any way and is legitimately just expressing himself. his fanbase despite their occasional issues are ultimately pretty much just very passionate people. and also he does not hate them! to quote the man himself

"guys, i don't hate you! stop telling people i hate you! stop doing that; i like you people! 99.999 percent of you are really good, and 99.999 percent of the people who piss me off are just going through it! i don't know where people are getting this idea the whole like 'will wood hates his fandom' yeah i know i said i hate you all in that song but... you know, it's a song! i like you guys."

if you have counter info/arguments though id love to see them. im always looking for new perspectives, and as i said ive *just* started listening to will wood and looking into his lore. i couldve totally missed smth and id love to hear it if i have.

[tea-coven]

I've been kinda hesitant to share this because I don't want to leak any personal info of anyone or myself, but I think I formatted it in a way that's respectful :>

About a year ago I attended my pediatrician, a lovely older woman who always made me feel really comfortable and I had a lot of fun talking with (which is rare for a doctor!). I was in my senior year of high school and she began asking typical college questions near the end of the appointment. Eventually she got to the expected, "-and what are you planning on majoring in?", I told her "2D animation!" I began to elaborate, as a lot of people I talked to about it usually needed me to explain what that meant, like cartoons, princess and the frog, etc. Eventually she spoke up in an "Ah!" manner, and excitedly said "Like Disney channel!".

This is went the story goes insane for me. And lead me to nearly passing out.

She states "you can make a lot of money off of those, very lucrative, congrats!". I was...confused. Most animators aren't known for their salaries and I wanted to know where she got the idea. She said "well my best best friend's kid, basically my godson haha, makes a lot off of it. He actually made a show on Disney!" (It was really sweet how proud she seemed, while still casual) I was pretty intrigued about this, and since I knew a good amount of animated shows and am really passionate about the subject, asked "what show? I probably have seen or heard of it!" (Especially since she said "made" and not "worked on"). She begins to go on about how she isn't sure if it's super well known or anything, but after more prodding (not malicious, I just was curious/ wanted learn about how he started), she goes

"Well I don't remember the name or much about it, but I do know that it stars twins, cause he himself is one." She began to go on about him, wanting to visit, and general stories about her and her friend. Small talk!

Unfortunately, I had froze, and also became increasingly grateful that I was in a doctors clinic.

I paused, and gently asked "is he...Alex Hirsch?"

"Oh you know him!"

"His show is gravity falls...it like, is the reason I'm so passionate about animating, story telling, etc. he's the reason I'm going to school for this."

She began to look a little confused while I talked, as I think she started realizing that this was not a small show. I speak up (albeit a little starstruck) telling her about how most my friends also really love the show. She had seen some of my work before, and began discussing how she was "sure he'd be as big a fan as her". (I don't say this in a parasocial, or bragging way btw, i just again found her really sweet and fun, and this a cute interaction)

The appointment was pretty much over by this point, but before I left she said "I'll give him a call and tell him about you! I'm sure he'd be flattered." I, as any 18 year old aspiring animator, go into a RATIONAL fugue state.

As my dad and I were leaving, and he finished signing some paperwork, she came out of a room down the hall waving, and called my name

"I just called and told him about you! He was very flattered! Good luck!"

And I, as any 18 yo aspiring animator, did the rational response

And passed out in the car