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hinatas-sunshine · 4 years

Text

Synopsis: Things you do as a tradition with Kageyama, Hinata, Yamaguchi, and Tsukki before they have a game!

Genre: Fluff ✨

A/N: Thank you guys so much for continuing to read my stuff and reblogging it! It means the world to me! You guys are free to send requests if you’re reading this! Love you guys & KITHES ❤️

Kageyama:

• Listen when you became a first year manager you didn’t think you’d end up dating a player

• You were a hard working manager and did everything you could for the team from baking them good luck cookies to helping them practice anytime

• Now as a third year - you are a pro at everything you do! And your boyfriend loves seeing you invested in what he’s doing all while doing what you want too

• You still have to keep Kageyama from arguing with Hinata - and Yams will most likely freak out a little

“Kageyama- time out!”

“Hinata you too!”

• Ah yeah you and Yams were a power team in the end, One that Hinata and Kageyama would never try against

• Kageyama will always find a way to help you and show that he supports you, it’s his way of showing he cares

“Y/n do you need help?”

“No she doesn’t she has me.”

• He got a little jealous if anyone helped you because he says it’s his job

“Tobio-Kun, I got it you can get back to practice.”

“But y/n-“

“I promise I got it.”

• He will listen - especially because he always wants to play better.

• and he does! But he believes it’s because of your good luck tradition

• that being you two holding a volleyball together and him pressing his forehead against yours, taking in a deep breath before kissing your forehead and getting on that court!

“Get a room.”

“Nice one Tsukki!”

• He’s on full game mode on the court because he knows you’ll always be there watching him

• You definitely get really into the game, while your boyfriend sticks to death glares you stomp around like a mad woman freaking out - YUP HE WOULDN’T HAVE IT ANY OTHER WAY!

• During time outs - if he’s getting frustrated you hold him while everyone talks through a plan it definitely calms him down so everyone lets it happen without a word

• When they take a win though he would most definitely be on his way to give you a smooch 😳

• and you would also text a picture of the boys to their senpai’d once the game is over

Daichi, Suga, Asahi: 🥺🥺🥺🥺

• The 2nd years definitely watch their games too you would know because Noya and Tanaka make kissy noises at you and Kageyama all the time

• You two end off the night by talking about the other teams and their plays while walking to his house to spend the night getting a good rest

“So you think he’s cutest setter?”

“I only said he made ONE good set!”

Hinata:

• You have been his friend since middle school!

• You never knew much about volleyball but listened when he spoke about it just to help him out and because he was cute

“Wait hold the ball like this y/n! See perfect!”

• From THAT hand contact you literally were glowing as red as a neon sign

• You two did start dating in your first year though when you ran into him in the hallway because he was running late to practice he wasn’t he just wanted to beat Kageyama

• When him and Kageyama got into a heated argument - you were there to help him practice and let’s just say your setting to him in the past payed off in the end!

• you had to pry Hinata off of Kageyama when they fought and calm him down - it was one of the only times you saw him angry

• But when things were back to normal you would watch the boys bicker endlessly back and forth - you always decided against getting caught between that so you and yachi were bff’s and ignored it unless it got out of hand

• You go to all of his games and he’s beaming with happiness!

• you also go with him to try to calm him down when he has to “go to the bathroom” but he’s actually nervous

• you almost peed your pants when Ushijima toward over both of you

“Suga he looked like he could kill me!”

• Yeah Suga had to save both you and Hinata when you would get scared of the creepers in the bathroom

• Before his games you like to help him prepare by making him work on receives until you go to the stands

• And after every point he makes sure your watching and you always are! Your standing on your seat with a fist in the air cheering.

“I need one of those.”

“One of what Noya senpai?”

“A girlfriend. 😔”

• After every winning game you’d wait for Hinata while his bouncing around and he hugs you until you can’t breathe

• Post game tradition is to get ice cream together and talk about how well he did!

You praising him always makes him so soft he’ll literally turn so red

Yamaguchi:

• You were a photographer and he met you when he was practicing alone one night and you were taking pictures of random things

• You asked if you could take some pictures of him and he was shy but said yes

• You often went to their games to get some pictures for your school and for memories

• You definitely have an ugly picture of Ukai only you and the team know of

• Don’t leave your camera unattended because you will find Tanaka, Noya and Hinata vlogs after

Tanaka: Welcome back to our channel!

Noya: I wanna hold it!

*Hinata making a 😗✌🏼 face before Noya is fumbling with the camera and shows him doing a rolling thunder*

Yamaguchi: Hey! Is that y/n’s camera!”

*the oh shits and no’s before the video ends*

• Yams takes your camera and takes pictures of you when you don’t notice

“I look like a potato!”

“You’re my potato! ❤️”

• You also have a bunch of pictures of Him and Tsukki after games when you three get dinner together

“I don’t wanna be a third wheel!”

“You won’t y/n!”

• Yes your boyfriend loves his best friend more and his best friend is snarky abt it

“Nice one Tsukki.”

• yeah the boy looked at you smirking

• it was just fun and games though, Tsukki appreciates you for caring abt Yams

• your pregame ritual is you spend as much time as you can hugging Yamaguchi - and you whispering sweet things to him

• When he steps on the court, he turns a little red hearing you scream like a mad woman

Your friends: Y/N can you calm down-

• You scream 10x’s louder as the ref gives you a dirty look

• When he feels particularly upset with himself you’re always there to reassure him that he works hard and he does everything is his power

• you also know you have to give him time but he’ll come around and you’ll give him the praise he needs

“Y/n, Daichi said he appreciates your cheering but not to anger the refs this time.”

Tsukki:

• You guys started dating after you met in your first year class

• You two sat in the back and one day you noticed the boy was miserable and not wearing his usual headphones so you offered him your backup pair - he gladly accepted

• You had both became fast friends and then lovers in no time

• You guys spent lunch with Yamaguchi and spoke about anything

• Tsukishima went away for practice camp and talked to you about everything and how Yams went off on him to which you respond:

“As he should 😗”

• You talked him out of bad moods if he had a rough day after practice - and just held his hand while you two listened to music while walking home

• Kageyama and Hinata were nice to you so you took a liking in them unlike your boyfriend

“Tsukki don’t be such a mean tutor!”

“But y/n-“

• Yeah he got jealous when you helped Kageyama figure out a problem on his worksheet so he was even more stern on Kageyama sorry Kags 😔

• He DOES NOT let you go to his games

• His pregame tradition with you is usually a song recommendation, more specifically a song that reminds you of him - he just waits for you to add it to you two’s playlist

• and he texts you after he listens to it 🥺

Tsukki: why’d you add the Jurassic Park theme song?

Y/n: it reminded me of you 😳😉☺️👉🏽👈🏽

• You also make him a bento to eat because you know he forgets to eat sometimes especially on game days

• Now it’s your time to shine! You throw on a glasses hat and hoodie and make your way to his game

• He notices you right away. How? Because that’s his hoodie dummy ❤️

“Y/n.”

“Yes? I mean... am not y/n I uh-.”

• you were a bad liar especially when it involved lying to your boyfriend

• But you didn’t understand why he didn’t want you to see him play because when you did you had sparkles in your eyes just watching him

• Tanaka definitely elbows him to make him see your starry eyes .... he turned really red

• He takes you home and you two spend the rest of your time sleeping and having a breakfast date the next morning while you chat about all the things going through you two’s heads

• and he finally allows you to go to games!

“Y/n you got here so late-“

• Yeah you were standing there in one of his jerseys and face paint ❤️

• you weren’t aloud to go anymore-

661 notes · View notes

sunshineseung · 4 years

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Little Secret Part 4 // Changbin

🍄 | genre: smut mini-series ☁️ | pairing: Seo Changbin x female!reader 🌿 | wc: 4.3k 🌸 | includes: Jisung x [man] just a little, yearning, teasing, making outtt, unprotected sex, hair pulling, slight size kink, slight possessiveness, no aftercare (yet)

“I’m going out!” Jisung slung his bag behind his back, heading towards the front door. You, sitting on the couch with your head in your phone, give him a quick mhm before he went on his way. You didn’t know where he was going, and frankly, you didn’t care. Jisung out of the house gave you the chance to invite Changbin over, assuming they weren’t hanging out.

You haven’t seen Changbin in two days, but the two of you have been texting nonstop, mostly at night when you were both tired and horny. Changbin hasn’t seen Jisung since he almost caught you, but they’ve been texting with Chan in their group chat. Unfortunately, that’s about it. Jisung was making his space away from Changbin.

Hey, wanna come over? My brother left

You wait a minute. Then a minute turns into 30, and 30 turns into 60. You start to regret sending the text considering he isn’t replying. You’ve given up hope before you hear your phone ring: It’s a call from Changbin.

“Hey!” You answer way too eagerly, probably freaking him out. “What’s up, Binnie?”

As much as he loves when you call him Binnie, now was not the time for his heart to flutter.

“Y/n, can I still come over?” You had no clue why he had to call you for that, but regardless, you obviously said yes. “We need to talk, for real this time.”

🍓🍰🐤🍀💐🍯

Jisung couldn’t look at you. He was repulsed by our actions to the point where he would cringe whenever he heard your voice, because he knew your mouth belonged to his best friend. He didn’t want to think about it, and he needed to get his mind off of it. Since he clearly couldn’t hang out with Changbin, he called his next best friend, Chan.

“Hey, Chan!” Jisung sounded happy though the phone, although he’d just been pounding his fists into his steering wheel out of anger moments ago. “Can we hang out in the studio? I need to let off some steam.”

It was about a month ago at a stupid house party. Chan was DJing while Jisung and Changbin were off partying, and he was doing a damn good job if he had to say so himself. Of course, just like every party, when the noise died down and people started to leave, Chan was dragged into a random drinking circle with several strangers, but most importantly, his best friend Jisung, although Chan would never call him that infront of him, because he knew Jisung and Changbin were closer than Chan and Jisung could ever be. Chan let the music run a random playlist of his while he sat, casually drinking and chatting before the game started.

Never Have I Ever: Ten fingers up, and if you’ve done it, put a finger down. Go around in a circle until someone, probably the most innocent out of the group, has won. It always goes wrong for Chan, though.

“Never have I ever…” a random girl looked around the circle, pausing to ponder what she’s never done, “had a crush on someone of the same sex.”

Most of the girls put a finger down, and the guys awkwardly looked back and forth until Chan slipped his pinky finger down. He couldn’t tell a lie, but he didn’t want to admit that he had conflicting feelings for other men, let alone his best friend.

The circle went quiet as they stared at Chan, eyes unmoving. In Chan’s head, it felt like the world was imploding around him and at any moment he could combust, but the game simply went on. No questions were asked, and they moved on. When it got around to Jisung, his galaxy brain sparked and he knew a way to get all the girls out with one hit.

“Never have I ever fucked a man.” A simple command, and all but one of the girls put down one of their fingers. Jisung didn’t know it, but he lit a fuse that led directly to Chan, and if he wasn’t careful, Chan was going to be set off.

Chan didn’t put a finger down for that, and he didn’t have to, but the idea of Chan being the man that got to make Jisung put his finger down was bubbling in his brain. It had been for months, but now that he heard the words come out of Jisung’s mouth, it felt real. It felt right there. At an arm’s reach, Chan could propose the idea to Jisung and end this party with a bang (quite literally.) Ever polite, Chan stayed quiet, remaining in his spot, letting the night go on without a hitch.

There was no way Jisung could know.

Being invited to the studio to be with Jisung was nothing new. They’d worked on tracks alone before, but Chan always had to leave early, his thoughts getting the best of him as he ran to his car to jerk off in an empty parking lot before driving home to go through the motions again. There was no chance of Chan getting together with Jisung.

“Sure! I’ll be down in a few.” Chan sighed, going to collect his things and head to the studio.

“It won’t be long! I just need to talk for a minute.”

Talk? Talk about what? Music? Friendship? Did another girl break his heart? Was he still going on about Changbin and his sister?

Chan had no idea. He just wanted to hear Jisung’s voice.

At the studio, Jisung got there before Chan. He sat patiently, hands folded in his lap, going over what he wanted to say. He had practiced his speech for Chan in his head, in the mirror, in his car, and even in his phone notes, but nothing could prepare him for actually facing Chan.

As if on cue, Chan walked in right as Jisung finished his mental monologue. A quick wave sufficed as a greeting, but before Chan could take his laptop out, Jisung told Chan to sit down and listen.

“This is going to sound crazy, but hear me out.” Jisung always sounded crazy, but Chan just nodded. “If you’re all caught up, you should know that Changbin is fucking my sister.” Again, a gentle nod. “Obviously, I don’t fucking like that, so I want to get back at him!”

“And what?” Chan laughs, rolling his eyes at the younger. “Fuck his sister?”

“No way! She’s way too out of my league.” He was only partially true. “I’m going to fuck the one person he cares about more than his family.”

“So, you’re gonna fuck yourself?” Chan was genuinely confused. He had no clue where Jisung was going with this insane plan, but as his brain slowly put the pieces together, his eyes got more wide. Jisung noticed his flushed expression and began to shake, scared of what was going on in Chan’s head.

“Chan, if it’s okay with yo-”

“Yes.” Chan placed both of his hands on Jisung’s knees, leaning forward to get closer to Jisung’s face. His features looked so detailed and pretty. They’ve never been this close before. Chan’s heart was beating out of his chest while Jisung’s heart was racing for another reason. Neither of them knew what to do.

“You’ve been waiting for this, haven’t you?” Jisung’s voice wavered as he asked the question. His eyes were glowing with the realization that Chan had some sort of sexual or romantic feeling for him. Chan cupped Jisung’s cheek, petting him before nodding in approval.

“What made you think of this plan?” Chan’s eyes left Jisung’s and wondered to his lips, cute and plump. Jisung had a slight pout, and it made Chan just that much harder.

“I…” Jisung trailed off, looking to a corner of the quiet studio. “I didn’t think much about it before, but to get back at Changbin, I want to fuck someone close to him, and you’re the only person I could think of.”

“I didn’t know you liked guys.” Chan admitted, leaning even closer and making Jisung sweat. He could feel Chan’s breath on his face, and just his presence was intoxicating.

“I didn’t know either,” Jisung paused, “but the more I thought about you…”

“You don’t have to explain yourself.” Chan’s hands crept up Jisung’s thighs, sliding up to his hips and pulling Jisung onto his lap. “Just let me make you feel good, baby boy.”

Whenever Jisung would describe his sex life, he was always on top: railing women and never looking back. He always depicted himself as being in control, but right now Jisung had no control. He was at the will of Christopher Bang, and Chan knew all too well what he wanted to do to the poor boy.

🍓🍰🐤🍀💐🍯

Changbin yawned as he rounded the corner, heading towards the 3Racha studio where he assumed he would be alone. As he approached, he noticed the blinds on the door were down although they always left them up. That’s weird, he thought, taking hold of the door knob before being stopped by the lock.

There was a commotion inside. It sounded like scrambling, things hitting the ground and other things being swept up. He thought it was just Jisung throwing a tantrum and wrecking the place, which would be a little funny, but a minute passed before the door swung open, revealing a disheveled Chan welcoming him in and a lazed Jisung, sprawled out on the couch, equally disheveled and a little sleepy.

“What-” Changbin looked around the room. The desk with the expensive equipment was safe, but one of the swivel chairs was pushed over and the pillows from the couch were on the floor.

“Hey, Bin! We were just working on something!” Chan was glowing, a smile wide across his face. Looking at the black computer screen, Changbin inhaled the scent of the room.

“It smells like balls in here, what the fuck were you two doing?” Changbin takes a step in, not taking off his bag, because honestly, he wanted to leave.

“Working.” Jisung’s voice was hoarse, and he quickly coughed to reverse the effects of having a cock down his throat minutes before. “We were making a new track.”

“Oh, really?” Changbin rolls his eyes and looks at his phone. He hadn’t noticed before, but you texted him.

“What is it? A text from my sister?” Jisung began sulking, all the memories of the past couple days returning to his fuzzy post-sex brain.

Changbin stopped. He had never fully admitted his involvement with you to Jisung, and considering he totally just got railed by the only other person Changbin trusted, he thought this was the time.

“Yeah, actually.” Changbin smirked, raising his brows and Jisung. Chan’s jaw dropped as if he didn’t know what was going on. Jisung’s face went red with anger, and before he could stand up and yell up a storm, Changbin turned around to head out. “She said her brother isn’t home. I should go take advantage of that, right Jisung?”

“You fucker-”

“Oh, and your sister gives great head. Maybe it runs in the family.” Changbin shoots a look at Chan before slamming the door shut behind him and heading back to his car.

🍓🍰🐤🍀💐🍯

You sat in the living room, waiting to hear Changbin knocking at your front door. You were terrified that he was going to try to break your relationship like last time, but it seems like he was content judging from texts. Maybe he just wanted to talk, or maybe he wanted to break your heart. No matter what, you wanted him here.

Three knocks at the door startled you out of your daze. You welcomed Changbin inside and you sat on your couch with him. This was the first time Changbin was sitting with you instead of Jisung, and it felt strange and familiar at the same time. Changbin’s heart was racing, and you felt the awkward tension as Changbin looked around, refusing to look at you.

You placed your hand on his thigh, bringing his attention to you. “You said you wanted to talk?”

“Yeah.” Changbin gulped, unsure of how to bring this up. “So, I told Jisung a few things, and he fully knows that we’ve been…”

“Oh?” You blush, afraid of what your brother was going to say to you and if he’d ever be able to look you in the eyes again. “Was he okay?”

“I didn’t give him much time to respond, but it looked like he was pretty pissed.” Changbin chuckles, and you do the same. A silence fell over the room as Changbin prepared what he was going to say next. He didn’t want to out his brother to his sister, especially if it was all a misunderstanding and Changbin just walked into the studio when it coincidentally smelled like balls. He just folded his hands and leaned back into the couch, resting the back of his head on the back. “What are we?”

His question hit you like a brick wall, because you didn’t have an answer. You’ve been an ace in all your classes and yet you couldn’t answer this simple question. You bit your bottom lip in concentration, replaying every conversation and moment you two had shared since the night Changbin so rudely barged in on your wanking session.

“Do you want to be anything more than fuck buddies?” Changbin reenters the silence with another headsplitting question. You’ve always wanted to be the girlfriend of Seo Changbin, but now you are clamming up. Did you want to be his girlfriend, or was it all fantasy?

“I want to be with you, Changbin.” Your eyes met each other’s for the first time, and it felt heavy, as if the air got thicker just by meeting the other’s gaze. “I don’t know if that means I want to be your girlfriend, but I just know I want to be with you.”

“Alright.” Changbin nodded, leaning closer to you. “Let’s forget labels for now.” He catches your lips in a kiss, holding your chin in one hand while your arms wrap around his neck, pulling your body towards his. He pulls away, breathless and calm. “I want to be with you, too.”

The next kiss is sweet enough to give you a cavity. It’s warm and inviting. No tongue, just lips on lips, appreciating the taste of the other.

Regardless of what your brother thought, you were content in staying with Changbin. No amount of family disapproval or shunning could stop you from being with Changbin. It was as if your world had begun to revolve around Changbin. He took real estate in your mind every day and night, consistently keeping you awake for hours on end from your heart beating too fast at the thought of seeing him again.

Changbin didn’t notice, but he had grown feelings for you. Before the first time you were together, you were nothing but a hot girl he thought about when he jerked off, but it quickly became more than that. He was infatuated with your existence. If you thought about him 24/7, he thought about you 25/8. He’s been with many girls before, but never one like you. No one made him feel like his world could fall apart at the removal of their presence like you. You were precious to Changbin, and he wanted to make you his and his alone.

You were sitting in his lap, legs spread around his hips and you grinded into each other, feeling each other up like it was the last time you were going to be together. His hands cupped your breasts, kneading you through your shirt and bra, while your hands rested on his thick arms, holding on like you were about to drown. Everything felt rushed while simultaneously being drawn out. You were both so desperate for the other that you didn’t even care about the clothes in your way.

No matter how much stamina Changbin had regularly, whenever he was with you, it always felt like he could pop at any moment and make a fool of himself. He loved your body so much, it was absurd. When your hands circled his nipples and gently pulled at the nubs, he felt his cock twitch in his pants.

“I need to be inside you right now, princess.” You loved when he called you that, and even more, you loved when he showed how needy he was for you. He stood up with you, kissing your face all over before meeting your lips in a deep kiss. You felt so overwhelmingly heated, and when Changbin’s bulge brushed against you, you couldn’t help but let out a choked moan into the kiss.

He pulls away and pulls your shirt over your head, throwing it somewhere behind him to bring attention to your chest. He’s quick to remove your bra and properly worship your tits like he’s been wanting to do. He kisses down from your lips to your chest, attaching his lips around one of your nipples, but not before leaving a bright red hickey to form on your neck. His tongue flicked against your sensitive nub while his free hand gently twisted your other. Your legs were getting weaker by the second, and you couldn’t help but have moans escape your lips. His hand that wasn’t playing with your tits snaked around your body, holding up you by the waist. Unfortunately, he didn’t want to be bent down forever.

He stood up, slightly towering over you. His hands snapped to your hips and pulled your pants down, exposing your pretty lace panties. Changbin licked his lips at the sight, taking it all in for a moment. You felt his eyes gracing over your body, and you shivered from the intense look in his eyes. You were already dripping wet from his touches, and Changbin could sense that you were as needy as he was.

“Let’s go up to your room, baby.” Changbin took your hand and turned around, heading towards the stairwell. “We don’t want your brother coming home and finding us here.”

You headed up to your room, not bothering to pick up your clothes from downstairs. It wasn’t until you were in your room, laid back under Changbin that you realized he was still entirely dressed while you were only in your underwear.

“Changbinnie,” he lifted his head from your neck, arching an eyebrow at you, “let me see your body. I want to see you.”

“Anything for my girl.”

My girl. Wow, you were his girl. His girl, all for him to use like a little cumrag. You were so high strung, and it felt like the only two people in the world were you and Changbin. He leans up, taking off his shirt and pulling down his pants, letting you see the impressive bulge in his boxers. You could practically feel his cock inside you just from seeing the outline. The whine you release is pathetic, and it makes Changbin laugh at your desperate state, but it also made him want you more.

He pressed his bulge against your cunt, dry humping you and feeling your wetness transfer to his boxers. You looked so hot while squirming under him. “Beg for it, baby. What do you want me to do?”

“Ch-Changbin,” you slurred your words, already going dumb from a few teasing touches. You felt so small under him. Not physically small, but mentally small. He could form a full sentence and you could hardly think straight. “Please fuck me, please~”

He pulled your panties down your legs, tossing them to the floor. His cock popped out of his boxers as he pulled them down, finally being free. He pressed his tip against your clit, circling it and feeling your hips jolt.

“More, Y/n. Beg more.” Changbin’s brain was starting to get fuzzy too. His tip was so angry and red. You whined at the friction of the tip of his cock going through your folds. You wanted him inside you so bad, but you couldn’t articulate any of your very few thoughts. All you could do was whine.

“P-please.” Your breathing was heavy. Without another word, you lifted your hips into his cock, hoping he understands your message, which he fully does, and as much as he wants to fuck you brainless, he also wants to hear you.

“Cmon, doll. You got this.” He holds your hips down and thrusts his cock through your folds without ever entering you. “Beg for my cock.”

You practically scream, “please fuck me, Changbin! I need your cock! I want to cum so bad for you, please.” You lose yourself at the end, unable to think any sort of coherent thought. Luckily, you didn’t need to speak anymore. Changbin was satisfied.

He lined up with your entrance and pushed in, going about half way before stopping and making sure you were okay. The stretch was painful again, but it felt so good. You loved being filled by his cock, especially since it dragged across your walls so perfectly. When he finally bottoms out, he waits for you to slightly return to your senses. Your breathing begins to even as you grow comfortable with Changbin inside you.

“Ready for me to move?” Your nodding is frantic, and your eagerness only eggs him on. He nearly pulls entirely out of you before pushing back in with one strong thrust, feeling somehow deeper than he was before. It felt like a new feeling. It felt different. He felt closer, warmer, better, but you couldn’t figure out why.

No condom. Changbin knew he didn’t put protection on, and he didn’t want to. He wanted to feel you around him. His stamina was good enough to make you cum plenty before he needed to pull out. He loved the way you felt with the condom on, and without, you felt a thousand times better. Fuck, maybe he wasn’t going to last as long as he thought.

His thrusts sped up, and he held himself closer inside you, hardly pulling out before plunging back in. The sound of skin slapping filled the room as Changbin leaned down to kiss you. Your tongues swirled together, and he ate up all your pretty moans of his name.

Your tight cunt hugged his shaft so well, and the way his tip prodded at your g-spot made your head spin. His lips on yours kept you grounded, you passionately kissing back regardless of your breathlessness. His hands cup your tits, playing with your nipples with his thumb and forefinger. Even though you hadn’t been together too long, he knew just how to make your body feel best. He was an expert at everything he did, and fucking you was no exception.

“Bin, ‘m close.” You spoke against his lips, him humming in response. His thrusts were rough, drilling you into the mattress. His groans sounded so hot, you never wanted them to end. He was right next to your ear, praising you and telling you how tight you were.

“Ah, turn over, princess.” Changbin pulled out and patted your thigh, promoting you to push your face into your pillows and put your ass up. The view was beautiful, but now was no time to admire your body. Changbin needed to be inside you again.

His abrupt re-entrance made you moan loudly while his cock stretched you again. His thrusts were even faster and deeper than before, and your orgasm soon returned to the edge. The bed was creaking loudly, and the headboard pounded into the wall.

In a flash, your head was pulled up by your hair. Changbin had your hair around his fist, pulling you violently out of the pillows and onto your hands. Your mouth hung open as he continued to violate your hole, brushing past your sensitive walls and pounding into your g-spot with every trust. His groans got louder and his pace began to fray.

“Cum on my cock, Y/n.” His voice was hoarse and demanding, as if he was about to bust inside you at any moment. “Let Binnie feel you cum, sweetheart.”

“Ah~ Bin!” You felt the knot in your stomach tighten, threatening to snap. Your mind was so foggy, and all you could think of was Changbin’s amazing cock and the way he was railing you so well. “Changbin, so good…”

“Yeah, baby?” He pursues you, egging you on to say more. “What’s good?”

“Your cock! Your cock is- ah!” You’re screaming at this point, begging that your orgasm washes over your fucked out body soon. Changbin pushes you back down into your pillow, muffling your moans until you can turn your head and breath again.

You bite down on your lip hard enough to bleed before your mouth goes agape, slurring every curse word you could think of as your orgasm hit you like a metal bat. Your cunt began convulsing, making it harder and harder for Changbin to keep from cumming inside your hot pussy. He looked down at where you two were connected and saw the abundance of your creamy release coat his cock thicker than before. Your hands squeezed the sheets as you began to become overstimulated, your body becoming sore fast.

“Changbin, it-” You’re still breathing heavily, thoughts slowly coming back to you. “It hurts.”

“Ah, princess,” Changbin pulls out, stroking himself intensely before cumming on your ass and your back. “Fuck, you felt too good.”

🍓🍰🐤🍀💐🍯

Jisung leads Chan into your house, holding his hand just to guide him upstairs. Before he can even put a foot on the bottom step, he sees your bra on the floor. He isn’t entirely sure that it’s yours, but he knows it can’t be anyone else’s. Chan’s ears perk up at the lewd sounds coming from upstairs, and Jisung soon notices too.

“We could go to my place-”

“No!” Jisung interrupts Chan just loud enough for it to be jarring. “They won’t mind a little more noise.”

#skz smut #stray kids smut #changbin smut #seo changbin smut #skz changbin smut #stray kids changbin smut #kpop smut

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bluebellhairpin · 5 years

Text

Marvel Headcanons - Road Trips

A/N: I’m a horrible person. But at least my procrastination of my asks is being for-filled in a way that still sprouts content. - Nemo

Summary: The Avengers and their S/O go on a road trip. Gods? Mutants? Aliens? with them, what could go wrong?

Masterlist

Loki Laufeyson

Bruh. You go on a road-trip with this guy and you’re gonna really wish you d i d n ‘ t.

Tricks. So many tricks. This guy can’t drive a car, he has nothing to do except play tricks. Look At That Face, no remorse, no mercy. You gotta be strong af to survive a trip like this with Loki.

bUt he does buy you all the food. And all the stuff you like. In mass amounts. (“(y/n), you said you liked this sweet packet stuff right? Ah, good. I brought five boxes so we don’t run out.” ) Like five whole boxes

So what’s it gonna be? Trickery for food? Yay or nay? Yay, definitely yay.

Peter Parker/Spider-Man

You will not sleep. Y’all get too hyped up of junk food and adrenaline to sleep for more then half an hour at a time so POWER NAPS ALL THE WAY THERE AND BACK

He video’s everything. He says it’s to show May and Tony when you get back but we all know the truth. Its so he can get one of those cool old-style videos of you No shame that boy has.

He lets you pick all the music, as long as it’s not AC/DC because he had an experience with Tony that involved ‘Thunderstruck’, hacking and his suits earpieces that lasted a over a week that we s h a l l n o t s p e a k o f e v e r

But overall it’s a really cute trip. So cliche. So romantic. So amazing.

Tony Stark/Iron Man

Loves every second because it’s with you and after everything he’s been through that is all he needs and wants.

He has playlists, cars, hotel reservations, restaurant reservations, food stops, food stashes, sights to see. All these things are ready before you even suggested getting away for a couple days.

Turns into a sappy, flirty mess. It’s almost like the trip turned back time to when you both first met and the only problem he had was making a new missile to sell to some place in Afghanistan.

He’s just so ready for a break, low and behold please give i t t o H i m

Steve Rogers/Captain America

Road-trips with Steve are done on the back of his motorbike and you can fight me on this. Mostly because he likes it when you wrap your arms around his torso so yeah fight me again.

Despite the trip being a road trip you both spend a lot of time at stops and motels instead of on the road. He likes taking things slow, since he hasn’t gotten to do things slowly for over four years after he woke up. He’s very grateful if you let him do this.

He lets you take lots of photo’s of him whether you’re good at it or not doesn't bother him. Even frames one you took of his silhouette because it looks that good to him.

Becomes addicted to cocktails after the second road trip because “they’re so colourful and come in so many flavours, (y/n) have you tried this blue one yet? Look they have one named after me-”

Thor Odinson

He gets so hyped and excited.

He really loves travelling and learning about earth more like you teaching him about earth stuff so he’s so optimistic about the whole trip and that attitude rubs off on you so you end up coming home all happy too.

He brings lollies/sweets/candy with you and lemme say you are bouncing off the walls the whole damn time. One time he got so hyped on sugar he almost summoned lighting.

You take Loki sometimes. He pretends he doesn't like it, but he does. He thought we wouldn’t notice but we did. So Loki ends up being the ‘bored’ third wheel while you and Thor stuff your faces with sour worms, chocolate, and gobstoppers.

Bruce Banner/Hulk

He’s gets so soft, and that makes you soft, and then you come back and your combined softness makes everyone else so very soft.

He worries about Hulk coming out and ruining the trip and the car but you constantly tell him and reassure him that it’s fine and you’ve managed to hone the ability to calm Hulk down when things get out of hand.

Needless to say he relaxes almost completely and w o w you didn’t know he sung that well.

And damn when you come back he’s like a changed man. Shyness? Almost gone. Reluctance to join conversations? Hell N a h. He almost becomes Tony 2.0 but only around you because “No one will believe you (y/n)”

Clint Barton/Hawkeye/Ronin

Clint almost l i v e s for road trips with you. I say almost because he lives for you.

You hunt down carnivals so he can win you all the prizes. The others aren't even surprised when you come back with a carload at stuffed toys anymore.

You also stop at a number of piers and sit at the end with fish and chips and some beer and just talk. Life. The future. The past. That one slice of pizza that tasted better than any others you've ever eaten in your entire lives.

You guys just do so much stuff. And its all so wholesome and pure and s o f t.

Peter Quill/Star Lord

Did someone say road trip? Peter has all the tunes.

So much as touch the radio/speakers without his knowledge and you're preparing yourself to (possibly) walk home. He doesn't care if you're the other side of the country. You will walk.

He's a sucker for staying up and stargazing with you. He'll point out all the planets he's been to, and all the ones he wants to take you to later.

While Stargazing, be prepaid to have him jump up and pull you to him if a 'dancing song' comes on. That can range from the 'Livin La Vida Loca' to 'All of Me’. It's amazing.

Scott Lang/Ant-Man

He's a dad. He knows how to keep others and himself entertained on long trips.

Magic tricks. Snacks. Music. Jokes. Everything and anything you can think of to pass time, he's got it ready and waiting.

Sometimes he takes Cassy with you, and honesty things become more fun (if that's at all possible). Which means, for you, more food, music from your childhood, and embarrassing stories about Scott that Cass had managed to get hold of.

Overall it’s pretty cute going on road trips with Scott, that and it’s never ever boring.

T’Challa/Black Panther

He’s a king, and a very busy one at that. So when you manage to pull him away from his duties he treats you extremely well.

First he takes you to a certain county (Once it was Singapore (that was a very luxurious trip), another time Hawaii, etc), then he gets a hire car and takes you wherever else you’d like go.

Every time, every trip, he finds a Starbucks. He collects the cups and brings them back to Okoye. He does it to spite her. You know it.

He gets much more relaxed on the trips, and always comes back being able to deal with his duties much better.

Bucky Barnes/The Winter Soldier

Wow okay first off, Bucky loves road trips with you.

He manages to persuade Tony to lean him one of his fancy older cars and takes you along the coast in that. He’s a coast road trip type of guy.

He really loves the beach, the only thing that gets in his way is the sand and salty water getting in the joints of his arm, but he says he can “just take it off, don’t worry darlin’.” so yeah it’s r e a l l y not a problem.

If he can't get a hold of one of Tony’s old cars, he gets an old pickup truck/ute and camps outside on the back with you and watches the stars and has old 30′s/40′s music playing from the radio. It’s pretty cute. Like him.

Kurt Wagner/Nightcrawler

Mate. This guy has no idea what he's doing.

Once he tried to bring, like, a whole ass record player because he was worried there’d be nothing to dance along to. Seriously, Kurt, we have a ca r a d i o for that. Precious Baby Boy.

He’s also pretty young, so be prepared to have lots of contraband School food (sour lollies, chips, etc) stashed everywhere in the car. This boy will eat all the junk food he can lay his three-fingered hands on. R E S T R A I N HIM.

He'd probably take every opportunity he can to cuddle you or take you hand in his. He’s not quite used to doing ‘normal’ stuff like this, so the fact he’s doing something like that with you means a lot.

Doctor Stephen Strange

He’s, um. He’s not used to this sort of thing either.

He’s been this arrogant, selfish, self-absorbed neurosurgeon for as long as he can remember. The most social and intimate thing he’s used to doing is ‘faking it’ with some random to make him look good.

BUT, sudeNly with you he kinda turns to a charismatic, sweetheart gentleman that will actually take you wherever you’d like to go. France? Okay. Brazil? Just south a little. China? Food’s great there. Russia? We’ll take ice skating lessons before we go.

He can’t actually leave NYC for long, but he will spend as much time with you on trips away because they help him relax and it’s n i c e.

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hearteyes-for-killmonger · 4 years

Text

A/N

This is Death Note meets Black Panther. So if you like the idea of Erik as Light Yagami, you're in the right place.

Let me know if you'd like to be tagged.

My fics have no READ MORE option because I do them all from mobile. :/ so sorry about the forever scrolls. 😫 Good thing is I'm keeping chapters to about 1500 words.

1. BEGINNINGS

Dear Journal,

I've written of much in my lifetime and now I continue this in my afterlife. But, Journal? How can I accurately describe this VAST realm where the ghost of my former self now exists? That is all I am.

I'll start with the sky for it has demanded my attention. The contrast of the deep purple and rich blue against blindingly white flashes of light make the starry sky of this ancestral plane the most majestic to behold, even greater than that of a Wakandan sunrise, and for that I am grateful. Under this realm’s sky which is so undefiled, so splendid, so divine that no mortal can look upon or stand under it without first forfeiting their very lives and human shells.. we souls of the past run free in our transcendent forms.

But are we truly free within this elaborate repetition?

When we are not running, we write. I'm sure you're beginning to understand. As ancestors, our words bind the earth realm to our own. We are accountable for recording the events in the earth as well as names.

“N'Jobu. Are you going to run?” Chika paces below on the ground, his jet black fur shining blue under the dramatic sky. Life in the ancestral plane is akin to a vivid dream that never seems to come to a point or an end. “What are you pondering so intently? Give that journal a rest, you are free, N'Jobu. You are meant to run on.. forever,” he spoke, each word echoing in my ear, a cement block sealing my monotonous fate. Is that all there is? Running?

“..I’ll remain here.”

Another omen. The curse of eternal disappointment. Chika runs, striding through the soft green grass, toward eternity. He won’t be back for a millennium and it will still be too soon in the scale of forever.

As I perch atop my branch inscribing these entries, I watch the living trapped in the sinking wheel which is humanity.

I see Wakanda entering a new era. I see impending war waged by the unjust. My claw moves on it's own, inking the names of the innocent and the young. They come everyday before their time. I cannot hold back my–is it sympathy? No, sympathy is invalidation. I’ve been removed from mortality for entirely too long to care. The thing I feel–is intrigue.

-N'Jobu

Sinking wheel aside, the human world has its interesting moments. The human mind is an interesting machine. Humans with the capacity to choose their destiny on a small scale will often cling to life for the sole purpose of defiling it. Tooth and nail, they fight to defy and delay the inevitable, still meeting the same fate they struggled against. Humans pursue the end of a certain evil only to be overcome by the specific evil they’ve created.

Humans as a whole? Predictably ordinary and violent. However, the most interesting things pertain to the actions of individuals. Individuals are the wild cards.

That's what I'd like to explore.

---------------------------------------------

Erik slid his phone from his pocket, sliding it in his line of vision as he walked briskly down the city sidewalk toward the block where his office building stood tall. Yahoo news had a few ridiculous articles, pointless in the nature. He considered putting in his earbuds to listen to his playlist until he reached his building. Or maybe he'd pick a research to dive into absorbing it for no other purpose than regurgitating it to the easily impressed. His business partner would be impressed for sure. Decisions, decisions. Clicking quickly through the internet, he stumbled on a title.

17-year-old Isaiah Mark Lewis was unarmed when he was shot after fighting with two officers who first used a stun gun on him.

Disgusting. Another senseless death at the hands of the morally corrupt, the third he'd heard of in two weeks. He hit the back button searching for something different, something lighter.

Marzeus Scott, an unarmed 35-year-old killed by police in Blytheville, Arkansas.

He exited his browser, pocketing his phone and looking ahead to the silver sky and concrete jungle which enveloped him. Black man with a bald fade and suit up ahead, 2:00. Black woman with a long skirt and blazer behind him, 6:00. He couldn't help but see clear targets on their backs as well as his own. It was an unspoken phenomenon, this fear of blackness that became the black soul's burden to carry. Like ants, black people were expected to work pointless 9-5's for CEOs that cared more for dogs and money than human life. Everyday there was the dark aura of the capitalistic, racist shoe hovering above, playing god.

His calf-skin Armani loafers hit the ground at a steady pace and the Harlequin Jacquard wool blazer he wore moved with him like a thick second skin. A police car rolled along with the traffic to his left as he kept his eyes forward.

2:00. Black man sitting on the ground. Elderly. Homeless. It was only a matter of time before he'd be chased away by some pompous authority. Erik took out a few bills folding them into his palm to quickly pass to the old man.

"I can't take this," he rasped. "I can't-- I-- Thank you so much. Thank you." He grabbed Erik's hand which held the $300 and shook it, not letting go. "Thank you so much," he repeated before Erik pulled his hand back.

Great. Now he had to wait at the crosswalk because he'd missed the break in traffic.

He checked his watch impatiently, a rose gold Patek Philippe Nautilus gifted to him by his team at 2K Security, Inc. Having fattened their pockets over the years, he was their hero. And now he was on his way back to his office for a virtual meeting with Samsung.

"Good morning, Mr. Stevens," Gloria, the receptionist perked on his arrival to the ground floor lobby. Nodding in greeting, he could feel her eyes scrolling over him but like every time before, he ignored this--stepping into one of the four large elevators which took him up smoothly to the very top where his spacious office resided.

Large floor to ceiling windows lit the white painted room naturally and his computer awaited, ON but sleep. He could practically see the seconds ticking quickly by, but luckily he was just in time for the meeting with Sandeep.

"Password and login, okay.. 2kMeetings.com. Input access code," he mumbled punching keys all to see the brown skin man with a pompadour of thick straight jet black hair staring back at him. He started the recording.

"Can I say this the best web conferencing software I've used thus far? And I've used a lot," Sandeep commented seemingly impressed. Erik wasn't surprised having been named in Forbes, but he smiled nonetheless giving humble thanks. This software was his own creation. The company overall was his baby. He nurtured it like one would nurture an actual child.

The meeting began and as it progressed, Erik had new projects to undergo, features that Samsung wanted to incorporate into their products and even into their own security and data systems. They began to talk user privacy, security VPNs, and MDMs. Soon after, it was time to disconnect and implement some of the changes discussed.

Hours later, Erik had not ceased in his work. He would not stop until he absolutely had to, it was a thing about him. When it came to his baby he was totally engrossed.

"Baby," Erik spoke into the phone catching it on the second ring when he saw the name Mika flash on the screen with a picture she'd taken and set as the icon herself. "Oh, uh--Dinner? I don't know, I've got a lotta shit to do today." He started typing a code and nearly forgot to continue his call. "Uh--Mika," he paused to type another line. "I may be late tonight."

Movement from the corner of his eye caught his attention. Something had fallen through the sky.

"Hm? Oh. What happened?--Nah, I ain't hear about that story, but I just read about two more today. They're just out here killing niggas left and right." He stood looking through one of the tall clean windows to see what had dropped from the sky. No one on the ground seemed to notice. Was he buggin? "Hm? They what? His hands were up and they shot him? With cameras recording?" He listened to his girl's angry report. She was right, they'd probably get off regardless of the evidence. She would know, she was a cop. Well, a detective.

He headed back to the elevator, cellphone in hand while his girl gave him the entire story, venting her frustration simultaneously. When he stepped onto the sidewalk outside of the building, there was no disturbance. No one seemed to be glued to the area for any particular reason. He looked in every direction including up finding a black leather bound journal on the concrete with its spine in the air. If he hadn't seen it fall from the sky, he'd have assumed some random passerby dropped it and he'd have ignored it. Picking it up, he shook and dusted it, turning it this way and that. "No. No protest." Mika was bent on being front line, but it was dangerous. She could get hurt. "You're not going," he asserted. "I understand, but I want you to be safe, okay? Hm?--Aight. I'll see you tonight. Love you," he said hanging up and pocketing the phone, both hands now gripping the worn journal. Whose was it?

The deafening whir of a siren broke through the city noise before a police car appeared from around the corner up ahead. The stories of the three recently murdered men swirled in Erik's head. With the police's extreme prejudices, the results were never favorable for those who looked like him regardless of what they wore, did, or their level of innocence and involvement. He could only imagine the violence that would come from the driver when he made it to his location. Would there be another bad report?

There he was again--anticipating the drop of the sadistic shoe overhead. An ant's mentality. As an ant, this world he was chained to was nothing but disappointment.

Tag list: @muse-of-mbaku @goddessofthundathighs @panthergoddessbast @thadelightfulone @misspooh @marvelmaree @youreadthatright @forbeautyandlife @theunsweetenedtruth @bidibidibombaclaat @myboyfriendgiriboy @dameshaemonique @blackpantherimagines @vikkidc @hidden-treasures21 @mysidefanting @hold-me-like-a-heart-beat @syndrlla97 @winteroflife @thotyana-in-this-hoe @texasbama @gingerylimonte @princessstevens @magic-madness-heavensin @wawakanda-btch @scrumptiouslytenaciouscrusade @wakanda-inspired @blackgirloneshots @thegucciwaffle @thiccdaddy-mbaku @purplehairgawdess @indigoxsummers @cccccx1 @dynastylnoire @iamrheaspeaks @blowmymbackout @they-call-me-le @theblulife @raysunshine78 @sheisexcellent @fd-writes @soufcakmistress @ju5tp34chy

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kythed · 4 years

Note

💕Hello! If it's all right was could I ask for a matchup? I'm a straight gal, 5'2" tall gal with pale skin and a thin form. I also have long brown hair, blue eyes and glasses.

As for personality, I'm kind, reliable and hardworking, though a little awkward in large social groups. I enjoy joking around and prefer looking at the bright side of things. My mbti is infj (and ennegram 9w1). I prefer my friends to be considerate and open-minded, someone who doesn't judge anyone by their first impression. I make a lot of bad jokes, so they need to have a sense of humour as well, or at least tolerance for mine😅

My biggest hobby is writing, which I think about almost around the clock. Fantasy and horror are my favourite genres to write, and for character inspiration I often do people-watching. I also sing, mostly in a choir, and go out for hikes in the nature because I love the fresh air and beautiful sceneries. My worst fear is letting people dear to me down and not being there for them in their time of need. I try my best to check up on them but sometimes I wonder if I'm doing enough . . .

My motto would be "If you're going to do it, make sure you don't have regrets later." as I strongly dislike leaving what I start unfinished. It makes me anxious.

My love languages are quality time, acts of service and words of affirmation. I'd like my s/o to know that I overthink often, that my silence doesn't mean I'm angry on uninterested but that I'm stuck in my own thoughts. A deal-breaker is definitely narcissism. Confidence is great but I don't like anyone who thinks the world envolves around them.

Thank you for taking time to read this! I hope it was all righ. Have a great day😊

——————————————————————————

thanks for the request ! i hope you enjoy :-)

- this was an incredibly easy choice for me; it just makes all around perfect sense-- I match you with kuroo tetsurou

- you need someone to keep you moving in the right direction because you burden yourself with way too much shit that shouldn’t even be your responsibility

- he helps you to identify what you really want in life and makes you pick n choose a couple of goals to focus on at once rather than doing everything and anything (something tells me you have a hard time prioritizing and saying no to people)

- you help him stop n smell the roses every once in a while because that man doesn’t know when to take a break

- you both share this incredible attention to detail and you both highly value and love getting to know other people

- he’s the one who booked you your first appointment with a publishing house once you finished your first novel and he used his death glare to scare the poor publisher into giving you a higher percentage of royalties on each sale

- SCRABBLE. y’all play a highly competitive game of scrabble every friday night and you always win. this typically culminates in kuroo throwing a tantrum and tickling you mercilessly until you agree it was “practically a tie” (nevermind the fact that you literally won twice the points he did)

- you love fantasy, kuroo loves sci-fi so your conversations are constantly peppered with ridiculous rants and arguments (e.g. “who would win in a fight, a dragon or a tie fighter?” “definitely a dragon babe, i mean it has fire and--” “okay but what if the tie fighter was piloted by a jedi?”)

- physical touch may not be one of your love languages but it sure is one of his-- he’s constantly got his chin resting on your head, or he’s slipping his hand around yours, or putting it on your lower back-- he also really loves giving you these crazy bear hugs (like picking you up and swinging you around type shit) because he likes to feel all big n protective

- I mean the man is literally almost a foot taller than you so can you blame him?

- you guys have literally the worst inside jokes that no one else understands but they send you into hysterics each times until you’re both crying with laughter (lots of terrible puns, yo mama and knock knock jokes that don’t even make sense)

- like once y’all were on a trip to rome and caught a cab to your hotel from the airport but then it took a wrong turn and it ended up that it actually wasn’t a cab and you had just climbed into the back of some little old italian man’s car

- so now whenever y’all are driving somewhere and accidentally go the wrong direction one of you says “mama mia!” in a terrible italian accent and you start screaming with laughter ITS LITERALLY SO OBNOXIOUS LMAOOO

- because you’re both so intuitive that the relationship is like being two halves of a whole-- you can instantly tell when the other is even the slightest bit down and adjust your behavior accordingly

- AND y’all remember the most random shit about each other

- like he once absentmindedly mentioned he loved this particular brand of orange juice and then you started buying only that brand to stock the fridge and he absolutely loves you for it

- and on your first date when you went hiking you pointed out a clump of flowers on the side of the path you thought were pretty so on the way back he secretly picked one and dried it in the pages of a heavy dictionary and got it framed for your birthday

- honestly it’s just little considerate things like this that make the whole relationship

- he always makes sure to involve you in group conversations because he knows it’s your tendency to be shy and hang back

- good conversation is a big deal for you guys but so is quiet time-- you frequently cook dinner together without exchanging a single word, just kinda doing your own thing (like you’ll chop the salad and he’ll make the pasta) and listening to your playlist

- speaking of music, you used to refuse to sing for him until one day he heard you singing in the shower so he crept right up next to the door and recorded it on his phone, and then when you opened the door he shrieked “AHA! CAUGHT YOU!” which nearly scared the shit outta you and made you drop your towel

- but, ya know, you don’t even need to be self-conscious about your singing around this man because he doesn’t have a musical bone in his body and will think that every single note coming out of your mouth sounds like an angel chorus

- overall you guys are that couple that is just so clearly in tune with each other, you know each other like you know yourselves and it’s such a delight to see (hanging out with you is a third wheel’s nightmare tho)

your song: first date by blink-182 (he loves punk pop and you think it’s dorky as hell but he’s adorable when he’s playing the imaginary drums and head banging-- he actually got you to accompany him on the air guitar eventually and it’s lit asf) plus the song perfectly captures the easy, eager way you guys love each other

your favorite movie to watch together: the fellowship of the ring. he wasn’t really into the idea at first (he wanted to watch terminator) but now he’s as big a tolkien fanatic as there is. once you brought him to one of those fantasy renaissance fairs and y’all had the time of your lives.

your relationship in one quote: “In all the world, there is no heart for me like yours. / In all the world, there is no love for you like mine.” - maya angelou

#matchups #matchup #haikyuu matchups #haikyuu matchup #gwensmatchups

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aurantia-ignis · 5 years

Note

L,M,N,O, & P :D

L: Your favorite fanartist/author gives you one request, what do you ask for?Do… I even have ONE favourite… ^^; I have a lot of favourite artists/writers from different series and with different styles, so what I ask for would depend on who offered me the request slot haha. Off the top of my head though…. For writing, I’d ask sad-goomy for either the superhero Lona AU or the GrimMara AU, and artpharos for the SoDa superhero AU. For art, I’d ask Miu for Lona with Silvally and an army of Rowlet family.M: A person who got you into a fandom and what fandom they pulled you in toMizu, or Atowaito on twitter, got me to watch Yes Precure 5/GoGo and it was a really fun watch! Also both artpharos and Sakami got me into Gundam Build Fighters and it’s such a shame barely anyone ever talks about it ;__; N: Your favorite fandom (for the people; not the thing you fangirl over)HmmmmMMmm! I think maybe a selective group of people from the Tales fandom ^^; To be honest I don’t really spend a lot of time talking to new people or strangers because I’m bad with building social links lol O: Choose a song at random, what ship does it remind you of?I picked up a playlist and shuffled, and it went to “The Time Has Come (Pikachu’s Goodbye)”Obviously it reminds me of Pikachu and Ash/Satoshi’s friendship LOL–Next shuffle was “Team which is the character theme of Taichi and Agumon from Digimon Adventure 02 so it’s another friendship piece HAHAHANext shuffle was Sakura Kiss (Piano). Being from Ouran, the first thing that pops to mind is my OTP of Haruhi/Tamaki. Although I preferred the art and humour style of the anime, it unfortunately ended way too early, and I followed the manga all the way to the end. Ouran is still one of my all-time favourite series, and definitely my favourite (reverse) harem series. And this ship here? I would go down with this ship. THANKFULLY IT’S CANON AND NO TRAGEDIES ARE INVOLVED. ;w;P: Invent a random AU for any fandom (we always need more ideas).Since you’re the one asking… Lonashipping it shall be => I used an AU prompt generator and this is what it gave me:

…which is hilarious. So let’s do it!

- Moon is a regular high school girl who is actually good at studying so maybeeee not so regular. She intends to become a vet one day due to her love for animals.- One day she comes across a strange small owl getting attacked by what looks like vicious hellhounds and she tries to chase them off. - The owl gives her a magical bracelet called a Z ring, and with the power of moonlight she transforms into Lunaala, a magical being with enhanced strength, speed, and defense. At this point Moon is screaming internally about how unscientific everything is because owls aren’t supposed to talk and magic isn’t real, but with the hellhounds trying to rip them apart she decides to magic battle first, chat later.- With the power of a crystal that the owl gives her, she defeats the hellhounds. The owl, who calls himself Rowlet, explains that they come from the magical Fairyland. Queen Lusamine of the Aether Kingdom has suddenly invaded the Luna Kingdom, imprisoning Princess Cresselia and bringing darkness to the land. - Rowlet was sent by Princess Cresselia to the human world to find someone who can inherit the powers of the legendary heroine Lunaala, to fight against Lusamine and her evil henchmen. Unfortunately, the hounds caught up to him when he reached Earth, and in the battle, the Z ring’s sources of power, Z-crystals, were scattered all over the earth. (actually just scattered in Moon’s hometown, because magical girl plots are always considerate of the fact that main charas are too poor to globe trot) - Rowlet asks Moon to fight for the Luna Kingdom and retrieve the Z-crystals, but like a sensible human being, she refuses, because she has School and Life to deal with. She returns the Z-ring to Rowlet and wishes him luck in finding another heroine. - Unfortunately due to the powers of plot, it appears that Z-crystals get tainted by negative human emotions, causing the human it comes into contact with to become a Monster of the Week villain. Moon couldn’t stand by and watch Rowlet and her townspeople get hurt, so she reluctantly puts on the Z-ring again. - Cue episodic structure of Bad Guy attacks using power of Z-crystal, Moon saves the day and retrieves the Z-crystal and gains new Z-move. - Of course Queen Lusamine realises that someone’s put a spoke in her wheel so she begins to send stronger henchmen down. This includes people from the Sol kingdom, brainwashed by Lusamine’s dark powers to fight for her. - Moon defeats every one of them until Lusamine sends this Dark Prince against her. Yeah, this is actually still a Lonashipping AU HAHAHA- The Dark Prince has a (star powered) Z-ring of his own and rides a powerful creature called Silvally. He weakens Moon and takes off with the Z-crystal she had been trying to retrieve. This happens a few times and Moon is getting seriously tired of being on the losing side, even though she hasn’t officially lost to him yet.- Obligatory break episode when Moon meets a random stranger called Gladion who looks somehow familiar. She buys him malasada and they talk and get along well enough. Gladion tells her that he has a younger sister, who is in grave danger, and his goal is to save her by finding something important. Moon shares with him her worries about having too many responsibilities heaped on her that she doesn’t feel ready to shoulder.- Neither of them realise who the other person is by the way- But when they do find out the drama is great- Moon is furious and accuses him of pretending to be friendly to get hold of her Z-ring. Gladion retorts that he had never thought of her as a friend. - Their biggest battle yet ends with Gladion seriously injured, but Silvally tries to protect him and Moon stops from delivering the final blow. Unlike the hellhounds which vanish into thin air, she can’t bring herself to kill either of them. Hellhounds arrive and carry Gladion off.- Back to episodic Z-crystal collection for a few eps. Moon is uneasy about why there has been no action from Lusamine. - Final Z-crystal collected. Return of the Dark Prince, in a brainwashed form similar to the other Sol kingdom folks. This time, his powers are enhanced dramatically and Moon struggles to fight him. But Gladion hesitates before the finishing blow, giving Rowlet the chance to rescue her. - The tables are turned and Gladion is defeated. They take the (moon powered) Z-crystals from him. Gladion blacks out and Moon takes him home. - Obligatory hide the strange man in the closet so parents won’t smell a rat- When he wakes, he tells her that Lusamine has both his sister and Silvally in her clutches. Moon suggests they work together to bring down Lusamine. - They travel to Fairyland together. - Ok I need to stop because this thing is getting too long and too detailed omg. Just random points from here- Rowlet’s true form is actually a powerful Decidueye. - Obviously Gladion and Lillie are both Lusamine’s children. Lusamine herself had actually been controlled by the Demon Lord Faba, who sought to rule over the whole of Fairyland. - The Sol Kingdom had fallen under Lusamine’s reign not too long after the Moon Kingdom fell.- One of the major final bosses is a huge monster Darkrai. She turns out to be Princess Cresselia. - Lusamine herself changes into a giant jellyfish monster for the final battle. - After they win, they banish the Demon Lord back into the demon realms.

#thank you for asking #holy crap this got out of hand oTL

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thespellweavingspirit · 7 years

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The Wonders of a Mindscape

This is the next lesson on Astral Travel! Enjoy~

What Is a Mindscape?

What I call a Mindscape also goes by many other names: Mindspace and Headspace are a few of the ones I’ve seen most often. A Mindscape is a protected space in the Astral reserved specifically for you. No other entities can enter the Mindscape unless they are A) attached to you in some way or B) have your explicit permission. Often, your mindscape already has many features that you have subconsciously introduced. Sometimes a Spirit Teacher/Guardian/Companion will chill there. HOWEVER. You must still ward this space because as I said, entities that are attached to you <i>can</i> get in... this includes energy parasites, trickster spirits you inadvertently invite in, and entities that force there way in by attaching themselves to your energy and/or cloaking themselves with it. Astral warding is a bit too much to include in this one post, so I'll cover it in the next one.

A Mindscape is a place that is influenced by you and your state of being. Let’s say you have a really Nature-y Mindscape. Forest sounds are playing almost all of the time, you can hear the distant waterfall, a gentle breeze is going. When you feel sad, sometimes your Mindscape will become sad right along with you. The Birds might stop singing, the waterfall in the distance might become silent, the air might become still. If rain is a “sad” thing for you, it might even start raining. Because your Mindscape is influenced by you, you can also consciously change it. You can change the landscape, or make flowers grow in a blink of your eye. You can zap a pretty little dress or an awesome leather jacket on yourself and build a castle on top of a shallow mountain. It’s the only place in the Astral where no rules apply.

In no other Astral Space can you do these things because the space will not be connected to you. You might be able to make flowers grow in the blink of an eye, but only if you have the talent, seeds, and energy to do it. If you zap on a piece of clothing, you’re taking that thing from somewhere else in the Astral. Remember this when you start to visit the Astral.

You can also temporarily disable the “no rules apply” feature of your mindscape. By doing this, you make the Mindscape a place exactly like the Astral--minus the entities. This makes your Mindscape a great place to practice Astral magic and the like. It is why I am telling you about this now: so that BEFORE you get yourself hurt somehow in the Astral, you can practice how being there feels first. You can practice offensive and defensive protective Astral magic, which is somewhat different from the spells you’re used to casting in the physical world. You can practice any new abilities you might find yourself having without many repercussions (other than tiredness). You can have a place to go when you need a little quiet time. You can even have a place to interact with your spirit companions--somewhere where you can probably actually *see* them in a way you wouldn’t on the physical plane.

Okay, But How Do I Get To This “Mindscape?”

With all this, now that I’ve probably gotten you excited, I think I’d better actually tell you how to get to this fantastical place. It’s quite simple really, and like Projection, there are multiple ways to do it. My favorite way involves meditation. Once you get there, it is easy to get back.

A Mindscape is connected to your mind; that’s why it’s called a Mindscape. I’ll share a few methods with all of you and you can try them out. If none of them work for you, pm me and I’d be willing to talk about some ways that might. I do recommend setting a time limit for yourself, though. What feels like a few minutes in the Astral could very well be a few hours here, and vice versa. Set an alarm that will bring you back if you get too lost.

Imagination

Sometimes the simplest way involves the least amount of work. Just start imagining your Mindscape how you think it would look/sound/feel/smell to you. Imagine the most minute details; the grass under your feet, or the stone walls of a mansion. Perhaps you will imagine a vast ocean or a beautiful forest. Maybe you’ll find your home in the mountains; or maybe you’ll find it in a nice, cozy cottage filled with herbs and crystals of all kinds. Get Creative. :) Remember that imagination is only the way to get there; this is a valid experience you will have. The things you will do and see and smell and feel are real, even if they’re just in a mindscape. That’s kinda the point lol.

Meditation

Sometimes during meditation, your mind will start to drift. You’ll start to think about random things, or maybe you’ll start daydreaming. Let it drift. Find yourself at peace, and sink deeper and deeper until you discover a place suffused with your thoughts and emotions. Relax. Also, keep in mind to meditate in a way that is right for you.

Guided Meditation

There are times when we need a guide to help us get places. My guided meditations are text-based. You read along and eventually, you break away from the guide and begin to take on your own view of things. Questions will prompt you to come up with your own, unique answers. This method is good for those who read a lot and find themselves getting sucked into the book, letting their own surroundings fade away.

Here’s a guide that I’ve used and have had others use before:

Prep: Get comfortable. Prop yourself up on a few pillows or drag a big, warm blanket around your shoulders. Make sure you are in a safe place where you will not be disturbed. Do not read this until you are ready.

The Guide: Your surroundings melt away from you. You find yourself falling in a void, though you are not afraid. You are safe. The invisible (or is it visible?) wind cradles your body, slowing your fall somehow. Eventually, the darkness that surrounds you begins to take shape. Look around and note what you see. What sights befall your mind? What scents? What sounds? The wind that cradles you, what does it feel like? You continue to fall, wondering if you’ll hit the ground. You cannot be hurt. Your fall slows, gently letting you down in the deepest part of yourself. Your feet touch the ground. The wind moves away.

Open your mind.

A Doorway

Doorways lead places. That has always been true. On the physical plane, they only lead to one place, and it has to be adjacent to the room you’re in. That is not as true on the Astral. There, a door is merely a passageway. A portal. Since anything can be adjacent in the Astral, the normal rules don’t apply. Imagine a door in your mind. It should be closed. Put your hand on the handle but don’t open it yet. Tell yourself that this door will take you to your mindscape. Believe it. Tell the door this. Open it.

A Watery Adventure

In the physical, water connects two landforms together. In the Astral, water just connects. Bodies of water can be another valid entrance into your mindscape. Like the door method, you just have to tell yourself the water will take you to your mindscape and not someplace else in the Astral. Draw yourself a bath. Relax into the water. Let yourself (your mind not your body please don’t drown) sink deeper into the water… deeper. Don’t hold your breath; you can breathe Astral water like air. Assert that when you reach the water’s surface, you will be in your mindscape. Then start to swim to the top.

Note: Do NOT try this method if you have a tendency to fall asleep while meditating.

Music

If you’ve ever wanted to know what a sound feels like, this is for you. Some of us like to zone out to music. Especially when listening to our own playlists, they can take us to a place of peace and relaxation. You sit down, put on your headphones, and start playing your favorite tunes. This helps to block out the rest of the world and is an especially good method if you’re not distracted by the music in your head.

Then, listen… feel the beats of your music. Notice how they move through you, changing you, resonating in some space in your mind. This works kinda like echolocation. Use the sounds to identify your astral space. Hear with your mind the way the music bounces off of objects; trees, ground. Once you know that it’s doing that, you know that object is there. When I did this the first time the music bounced off of a tree, making a sort of “wooden” sound, and the tree appeared in front of me, clear as day.

Bilocation

This is good if you have a hard time focusing while just sitting or lying down. Bilocation is the act of splitting your consciousness between a physical action and moving in the astral. For example, you could draw or doodle while the rest of your mind wandered into the astral, almost like a daydream. Some people like to jog or exercise. The physical exertion helps them focus their mind.

I, personally, liked to Travel while throwing. I’d wedge up my clay and it’d relax my body, loosening it and getting me focused. I’d sit down at my wheel and begin to center my clay. While I did that I was simultaneously centering my mind. After that, I could leave my body behind, which knew all the physical motions and what to do, and switch my mind to focus on my mindscape or some other place in the astral.

You can also paint, craft, play an instrument, or do any other “mindless” thing where you are physically moving your body.

How To Create Or Make Additions To A Mindscape

Some of us don’t have mindscapes that are readily made and filled with many things. If none of the above methods have really worked for you, this could be the case. Please note that most of the below methods can also be used to enter your mindscape once it’s been created.

Draw it!

If you’re the artsy type, then this is for you! What better way to create a mindscape than to actually create it? The best part is once you have it drawn/painted/stitched/whatever, that physical representation of your mindscape can become a portal to enter it. Focus on your rendition, and imagine yourself actually being in the place you have created. If you’re making an addition, start the drawing with a part of your mindscape that already exists so you can connect the two.

Start With Darkness/Light

Sink deep into yourself. Once you feel you’ve reached the deepest point, it’s time to create. Out of the Darkness, make a place that appeals to you. Imagine a waterfall or something. Have any of you ever seen Barbie: Rapunzel? You can imagine your Darkness (or, if you prefer, Light) as a canvas waiting to be painted on. Imagine that the paint brush creates the grass or stone under your feet, then watch it happen. You can also make additions this way; just take a brush or a finger to a place you want to make an addition and imagine it being created.

Write about it!

If you’re not the best at drawing or even imagining, this could be the method for you. Write about your mindscape like you’re describing a place in a book. Use the 5 senses just like a good description would do. Here’s an example from a book I’m writing:

The sky was a vivid green. Both moons hung in the sky, even though it was the middle of the day. The vegetation was every shade of blue and purple, so unlike the stark green plants in the Mundane world. Shadows darted in between the trees; flowers glowed with a strange luminescence. Soft chirps and other weird noises made up the song of this crazy forest that smelled like earth and plant and dark things. Strangest of all were the creatures that peered out from the darkness, their eyes a mixture of the darkest gold and the softest gray.

Once you’ve created it to your satisfaction, you can also use your description to enter your mindscape. The description should pull you into your mindscape when you read it. It’s like reading a good book and letting the rest of your surrounding fall away as you are sucked into a different universe; kinda like the strange place I’ve described here. You can also make additions to your mindscape simply by adding to your writing~

Connect The Idea of Your Mindscape To A Physical Object

Another way to get to your mindscape is to attach the idea of it to an object. I have a favorite crystal I carry around with me almost everywhere. I can spend a few days meditating on the fact that this crystal will take me to my mindscape. Doing so will help me associate the idea of it to my crystal. First, you have to get a good sense of your mindscape. Think about what it looks like, feels like to be there. Attach this idea to the object by sort of mentally “throwing” the idea at it. Then, you keep thinking, over and over again, “This crystal is connected to my mindscape. It will take me there if I will it.” You have to do this a few times over the course of maybe a week before the connection will stick. Also, as this is an addition, your mindscape has to already be created so you can more completely connect it to the object. Once it has, you can use the object to get to your mindscape by fitting your consciousness into the crystal.

Alright, I think I’ve exhausted my knowledge of mindscapes for the time being. I’ll make additions to this document if I find other ways that I know of. Remember everyone, you don’t have to visualize the things I’m talking about. If you’re using the writing method, for example, try something crazy: describe your mindscape without using sight. Talk about how the grass feels under your feet or the scent of a salty ocean on the cool breeze. The ability of your mind is not limited to sight.

The next lesson will focus on how to protect yourself while astral traveling. Until then, practice being in your mindscape and getting there. Practice moving your astral body there and keeping your conscious focused on the astral, instead of in the physical.

#astral #astral travel #astral projection #mindscape #headspace #mindspace #mind palace #witchcraft #magic

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austinpanda · 3 years

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Dad Letter 021421

14 February, 2021

Dear Dad--

Well...happy Valentine’s Day! In case you’re not doing anything special to mark the day, Zach and I are vigorously not celebrating it either. It’s a Sunday in the time of plague, and I no longer have the NFL to ignore. We’ll stay in and do chores, trying not to get breathed on by anybody. We’re both still alive and well, and we intend to keep it that way!

I spent yesterday ripping DVDs. It’s just like taking the songs off a CD and putting them on your computer by ripping the music disc, only it’s extracting the movie off a DVD. What this means is that, for the first time in my life (although I have friends who’ve been doing this for years), I’ve found a little free software application that will read one of my DVD movie discs and convert it to a digital file that I can play on my computer. This is something of a big deal for me, because it involved overcoming a technical hurdle: The makers of DVD movies don’t WANT you to copy them, so they put in anti-piracy safeguards to try to make it difficult. But the free application I found doesn’t seem to give a shit about copy protection! And, when it pulled the video off the discs and converted it to digital files, it kept the subtitles. I can watch it on my TV or my computer and still have the subtitles, which is good.

All this means is that I’ve now ripped all of Monty Python’s Flying Circus, from the boxed DVD set I was given a few Christmases ago, into digital files. I have a small, old, cheap computer hooked up to my living room TV and it can play these files. I have stored all the episodes in the computer and made a playlist that will play them all, first episode to last, with one double click. In one sense, it means I’ve saved myself the egregious over-expenditure of energy required to put a DVD into the DVD player, and I can now watch the show by just telling my computer to play an episode at random. In another sense, it’s actually accomplished a few things. Firstly, I can now play every episode of Monty Python’s Flying Circus, in order, without having to change discs. Also it means I can sell the DVDs back, because I now have all of their contents on my computer, taking up no space at all. It all fits into my goal of owning less weight in stuff each year than the previous year. Trying to lighten my load.

After I spent several hours ripping every episode of Monty Python’s Flying Circus, I then spent several hours ripping 122 Beavis and Butthead episodes. I’ll say this about Beavis and Butthead: They were the best summary of everything that was laughable about my generation, and it was made by someone from Texas (Mike Judge, who then made King of the Hill), so a lot about the world in which Beavis and Butthead is set is familiar to me. There’s an episode where they’re temporarily running a neighbor’s yard sale, and when a woman asks why they removed the baby Jesus from a little manger scene for sale, they said the Jesus was sold separately, and added, as their selling point, “He’s naked. Uh-huh-huh-huh.” Incurious, destructive, and horny. It was everyone and everything I remember from middle school.

After spending yesterday swapping DVDs out of my computer over and over, I have no such productivity planned for today, and I can go back to my primary pastime, which is waiting anxiously to see if I can get a Covid vaccination before my retirement savings runs out, so I can get a job without worrying about being exposed to other people. The state of Maine is actually getting its citizens vaccinated at a decent pace, but it’s still ONLY doing front-line medical workers, and people over 70. As for those of us under 70, there’s no waiting list, no place to sign up online, and no indication when it will come. I’m going to stay on top of this. I’m in a risk group, being over 50 and having sweet tea for blood, so I’m hoping that as soon as they open things up, I’ll be one of the first in the next group to get vaccinated. If it takes until summertime, I might be in trouble, but I’m still looking for jobs that can be done from home, or that don’t expose me to lots of other people. I just saw something in the news that said, by this point, fully one-third of Americans have been infected with Covid-19. And the news says, if you’re still going to the store for your groceries, you should probably stop doing that. Not sure what I’m supposed to do for groceries, if that’s the case!

So, as may be a bit obvious, I have had some problems with depression lately. It’s nothing too terribly worrisome, since it’s mostly external factors driving my emotions downward--financial, pandemic-related, social isolation-related, etc.--and those are a bit easier to fight than the ever-present internal ones. I wrote everything down into something I call my “Litany of Complaint,” which is a list of everything vexing me, re-written and updated as needed, where I let ALL the bile out, and sent the current version to Stacy. Stacy did what all good Stacys do, she empathized, and reiterated that, if our financial situation is ever sufficiently dire that we’re forced (metaphorically) to eat cat food, to call her for help. A Stacy safety net...a Stafety net, as it were!

I can report, therefore, that life is not all doom and gloom! I think a bullet list of all the things making me happy is in order.

- The new occupants of trailer 1 (just in front of ours; we’re 1A) have installed something interesting: an orange light in the back bedroom that is as bright as the sun. It is a high-pressure sodium light. They are growing weed in their back bedroom. That’s legal here.

- Our two cats now sleep together, in a pile, on the electric blanket on the sofa, every day. Occasionally, they wake up and start to fight or lick each other, then fall back asleep. (Isn’t it fascinating how closely biting/murder is to licking/grooming on the color wheel of kitty behavior? They’re adjacent! One behavior will slip into the other, and slip back again, like a change in wind direction.) It’s ridiculously adorable. We hoped they’d become family to each other, and they did! We’re grateful for their dumb asses every day.

- We live between two Dunkin Donuts. There’s a Dunkin about a mile and a half in either direction of the road we’re on. Now they’re taking an abandoned Tim Horton’s on our block, and converting it into another Dunkin Donuts. So...no Whataburger, KFC, Taco Bell, or Jack in the Box, but I’ll soon be walking distance from three Dunkin Donuts.

- I was computering on my computer a few days ago when I saw something huge land on our bird feeder outside. It was a big, gorgeous hawk-looking thing, and I called Zach over, stupefied, “Bird! Big! Big Bird! Big hawk thing!” Zach saw it too, and almost got a picture of it. After it left, we looked it up and identified it as a peregrine falcon. We have bald eagles in our neighborhood, too!

- I still love the snow, and it’s still goddamned magical whenever it happens.

I have one plan for today that might interest you; I’m going to look up a Revolutionary War battle that’s mentioned in ‘Hamilton’ and see what happened there! There’s a line in Hamilton about how General Lee “shits the bed at the battle of Monmouth,” so I’m now curious to learn exactly how he did so. I’ll let you know how it turns out!

As Mr. Spock says, live long and prosper. All my love to you both!

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movedtosalamoonder · 7 years

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Edge of a Knife ~ An SI-5 Fanfic [ch. 1]

Kepler, would you T U R N O F F T H E C O U N T R Y M U S I C already??

Wordcount: 4k

Genre: Angst, slowburn, prequel/origin story

Warnings: Past self harm, scars

A/N: Just so y’all know, this fic will, in the future, involve Kepcobi. NON-IDEALIZED Kepcobi. It’s very important to me that they not be romanticized, since their in show relationship is so unhealthy. So future warning for unhealthy relationship.

Prologue | Chapter Two | Chapter Three || Masterpost || || Read it on AO3

It starts the moment they pull out of Maxwell’s driveway. The incessant, insistent, clamoring hell that the rest of the world calls country music.

Jacobi groans and slouches so low in his seat that he can barely see the road. He pictures the dashboard rising up his line of sight as a wave of oil, ready to drown him and pull him into the merciful, peaceful, quiet black void of death.

Kepler takes his eyes off the road for a minute to grin down at his weapons expert-though he’s careful to do so while Jacobi is looking away.

“Mr. Jacobi...is it really all that bad?” he says, in a tone that does nothing to betray his expression.

“Yes…” Jacobi whines. “Country is, like, the audible embodiment of being slowly crushed to death by a thousand tractors driven by people wearing infinite layers of plaid flannel and camouflage while it rains cheap beer.”

“An accurate summation of the experience, Jacobi. Kepler, are you trying to kill us? We’re not even on the highway yet. At first I thought it was a practical joke, but practical jokes aren’t supposed to do you any permanent physical harm.”

“What...permanent physical harm is this delightful music causing you, Maxwell?”

“In another two minutes my ears will start hemorrhaging,” Maxwell deadpans. Kepler just chuckles.

“Please, sir. I’ll do anything.”

Kepler raises an eyebrow at him. “Anything, Mr. Jacobi?”

“Oh, no, not this,” says Maxwell, curling into a ball around her phone, which she was presumably programming to make coffee or blow up the white house. “Anything but this. I’ll take the country music over you two flirting.”

Jacobi colors significantly. “We’re not flirting, Lana.”

“Suuuure you aren’t.”

Kepler huffs, offended-though by him or Maxwell, Jacobi can’t tell. He decides not to ask.

“Tell you what, Maxwell. I’ll let you pick the music for the rest of the trip-hell, you can even make a playlist-and in return, I get to tell Mr. Jacobi whatever I want-without complaint from you.”

Jacobi glances back at his best friend for a moment, forgetting the torturous country music. Maxwell looks almost pained. Her nose is scrunched and she’s biting her lip, hard-she looks like a confused rabbit.

“Do we have a deal.” says Kepler. It’s definitely a statement; even in banter he retains his authority. Jacobi shivers.

“I-can I use Spotify Premium?”

The corner of Kepler’s mouth twitches. “Done.”

“Great.” Maxwell immediately pops a pair of earbuds in and continues scrolling through her phone.

“You had those this whole time and didn’t use them?” Jacobi asks, exasperated. Maxwell shrugs. “ ‘S more fun to make fun of Kepler’s terrible taste-”

“Hey!”

“-which will soon be corrected,” she finishes smoothly. “But you’re on your own now, at least until I build the most epic road trip playlist ever heard by humankind.” She winks. “You’re on your own with the Colonel for a while, unfortunately.”

The next chunk of time-Jacobi feels it like hours, but he knows it’s probably minutes-is kind of odd. He’s not used to not having anything to do, and Jacobi is not a patient man (at least not in the sense that most people mean when they say “patient”). Math, and working with his hands, those he’s good at. One step flows into another over and over, all with an end goal, and there’s no biding your time waiting for dough to rise or for-for mice to warm up to each other, as is the case with some of Maxwell’s hobbies. There’s no staring into the distance or trailing your hand in the windstream. There’s none of this...idleness.

In all honesty Jacobi will probably been fine if someone just gives him something to do-like tallying the number of Toyotas from before 2008 that they pass. Stakeouts are never really a problem for him either, as long as he has someone or something to keep an eye on. It’s-Jacobi swears quietly as he realizes-it’s not having anywhere to look.

Not having anywhere to look, that is, besides Colonel Warren James Kepler.

He’s still glowing in the light of his recent promotion, and even though Jacobi can tell he’s definitely not happy with this particular assignment, there’s something about the tension lining his shoulders and the clench of his jaw that makes him all the more attractive. The rigidity of his body is a framework, a skeletal building structure, and Jacobi is stuck through with support beams. He can’t move his gaze or they’ll collapse and fall away.

He wriggles his shoulders, trying to make the beams align just right, so he can look away without them falling.

He can’t.

Jacobi settles for staring at the gearshift, but his eyes are mostly on Kepler’s hand resting lazily beside it, fingers spread, tarnished college ring shoved over his middle finger. The support beams tilt.

“Jacobi. You alright?”

He nearly jumps-nearly betrays himself. “Fine, sir.”

It only takes him a second to realize his inconsistency. “Besides this hell music, I mean.”

Kepler raises an eyebrow but doesn’t say anything more. Maxwell taps at his shoulder. “Hey. Danny. What do you think, Kansas first or Toto?”

“Kansas or-Maxwell, what are you doing?”

She tips one shoulder in a half shrug and leans her head against it, and her hair sweeps over the back of her jacket, too broad in the shoulders as always. “Making a playlist, duh. I always felt that Kansas and Toto should be next to each other but I can never decide how.”

“Well-” he’s a little thrown that she want his opinion on this- “uh, which one-which one sounds good next to the other?”

Maxwell slides her tongue over teeth in concentration. “It’s not about that really, I just want the words to look nice.”

“But you’re going to be hearing the playlist.”

“Well, yeah. But it needs to be written out, doesn’t it?”

“I...I guess? Sure? Wait, why?”

Maxwell rolls her eyes. “It just does, Jacobi. The numbers have to be right and the artists have to look good together and the number of words in the title of each song have to vary right.”

Jacobi blinks. “What?”

“Can I make it any clearer?”

Kepler chuckles softly. Jacobi ignores him.

“Waaait...is this...is this some weird coder thing?”

Maxwell huffs a sigh in his face. Her breath smells like the tiny hospitality mints that haunt Kepler’s office-Jacobi knows because he and Lana are the only two people who ever take them. For anyone else, he suspects, it must feel like snatching a piece of treasure out from under a jealous dragon. At least, it must while Kepler is looking at you with that disarming smile, his (fake) military jacket just barely tight enough for the muscles in his arms to show, worn like armor, like a comfortable shell. He belongs in that uniform, but he’s important enough to add his own piece of it to fit his tastes, not even necessarily because he wants to but because walking past all the senior officers and watching them actively not mention it is a display of power, of-

“Jacobi. Are you listening at all?”

“Hmm?”

“I said it’s not some weird coder thing, how would you like it if I explained every one of your many idiosyncrasies by asking if it was ‘some weird bomber thing’.”

“Demolitions expert.” Jacobi muttered.

“Whatever! Just help me decide what to put first.”

Alana Maxwell is many things. Annoyingly organized, for one, Jacobi thinks as he swipes her playlist into random order, hoping she’ll like it better than the last one he tried.

She’s his sister, too, though, and sisters are supposed to be annoying. Something would be wrong if she didn’t try to tease the crap out of him every moment they were together. It’s one of the ways he knows she’s in a bad mood.

She….she kind of looks it now, come to think of it. It’s been quite a few miles since she’s come up with anything scathing to say about his song selection, instead answering with a bored “nope” and a sigh. He’s finding it easier to think, now that he has something to do besides look at his entirely too attractive commanding officer.

He catches her, looking up between songs, running her fingernails along the top of her thigh in a smooth, predictable motion, not quite intense enough to be itching, not quite light enough to be casual fidgeting. Her lips tighten when she notices him and she snatches her phone.

“Are you done yet? Also-why, why is Avril Lavigne next to Three Days Grace?”

“I...don’t know who either of those people are. Lana, you okay?”

“Fine.”

“I told you to pack shorts.”

“They were all in the wash,” she says, avoiding his eyes.

“Lana, really? All of them? It must be a hundred degrees out here. And you say I don’t know how to pack. What were you thinki-”

Her glare cuts him off as she mouths “shut up”. He gives her a look, but mouths “alright, fine”.

Jacobi turns back to face the road, uncomfortably aware that Kepler is staring at him and not a little concerned that he’s going to run them off the road. “Colonel, can we stop at a gas station? I have to go to the bathroom.”

“...Sure, Jacobi.”

He can hear a hint of curiosity in the usually flat drawl but doesn’t speak to it. Lana has her secrets. And if Kepler makes her drag them into the light of day Jacobi will punch him right in his perfect face.

They’re passing the airport now. Jacobi glares out his window at each plane, the searing hot sound of each takeoff nestling into his ears and making him restless. Why they couldn’t just fly to California he’d never know, and Kepler didn’t seem about to tell him.

Probably some stupid team building exercise.

They pull into the nearest 7-11 once the worst of the traffic is past them. Kepler immediately starts tapping his fingers against the wheel, which Jacobi takes to mean “if you won’t tell me what’s going on, I’ll just be very, very impatient.” He gets out of the car fast, grabs his backpack because he has a feeling he might need it, and taps a hand on the back of his seat-a small, but unmistakable, invite to Maxwell.

The inside of the gas station is dark and very faintly blue after the persistent sun outside. Alana’s footsteps are reluctant. Jacobi can hear the jarring scrape as the soles of her sneakers drag against the linoleum. He doesn’t say anything until they’re over by the slushies-the only other person in the building is a half asleep teen with about six eyebrow piercings but Lana needs space. More space than this, but it’s the best he can do.

He’s beginning to fill a cup with blue raspberry when he feels her forehead against his back, thudding into him in concert with a soft “ugh”.

“Hello,” he says casually.

“Jacobiiiii.”

“That’s my name.”

He reaches for a lid, hunts around with his eyes for the little scoop-y straws. Ah. There they are.

For a second he thinks she’s about to say something important, but instead- “You know I hate blue raspberry.”

“I know,” he says calmly. “This is for me. Next one’s cherry.”

Kepler’s Pina Colada is nearly full before she actually says anything with any weight.

“I don’t like this.”

“Don’t like what?”

“Don’t like being in a car, with other people, without-without having-”

“Without being in complete control? You are a bit of a control freak, Lana.”

She punches his shoulder, nearly causing him to spill Kepler’s slushie. “Shut up.”

“Hey! Watch it,” he says, but it’s more of a mumble than a demand. He sighs, slow through his nose so Lana doesn’t hear.

“Okay...so...right this instant, what would help?”

“That slushie, for one.” Alana says, scooping it up the counter and sticking the straw in her mouth, gazing at him with faux-Bambi eyes. “It is so hot.”

Jacobi frowns at her. “I still have to pay for that. And you should be wearing something more suited to Florida instead of your New-England-Winter apartment.”

“Fall,” she says around the straw.

“What?”

“New England fall. It’s not that cold.”

Jacobi rolls his eyes. “Why don’t you have any shorts? You’re gonna get heat stroke.”

“I do have shorts. For home.”

“Meaning?”

She won’t look at him. He suspects any further conversation designed to get information out of her will not go over well. He tosses his backpack on the floor between them and takes the cherry slushie from her, balancing it against his chest. “Go change, there’s shorts in my bag.”

Maxwell bites her lip. “I just don’t want Kepler-”

“Relax. He won’t.”

“Fine.”

She takes the bag, eyes downcast, and Jacobi heads over to the register to pay. By the time he’s done Alana is out of the bathroom. His shorts are a little too big for her but they look comfortable enough with her belt, and more importantly they’re long enough that you can’t see her scars. “Help me carry?” he says, and she takes her slushie and continues to drink like nothing’s happened.

“You have to actually help me with the playlist now, instead of just shuffling it around. Like I wouldn’t notice.”

“Fine, Lana, as long as you help me make Kepler stop for lunch.”

“Alright.”

Her tongue is bright red. He resists the urge to smile. His hands are going numb from the slushies, but he barely feels it. It’s a nice contrast to the clinging heat. They walk outside and he starts to open the shotgun door, and then-

“Comfortable, Doctor Maxwell?”

Screw it, Kepler can wait.

“Perfectly,” says Alana, unruffled, but Jacobi slams the shotgun door, holds the backseat door open, and nudges her into the middle seat with his shoulder anyway. He hates Kepler picking on her. He hates that he doesn’t think about anything beyond his own authority and how to get more of it. You know people, you control them. Jacobi’s familiar with the tactic, but damned if anyone is going to twist Lana’s insecurities into a weapon.

“Jacobi-” she protests, but he’s already strapping in.

“C’mon. We’re gonna finish that playlist, kay?”

She pinches her lips together, flings a loose strand of hair over her back. “I’m not a child, you know,” she half whispers, half mouths.

“I know,” he says out loud. Kepler sighs, loudly. Jacobi pretends he doesn’t hear. There’s a few tense moments of unsteady eye contact, and then Lana hands him her phone.

“Fine,” she says, “but this time I get to watch to make sure you’re not as much of an idiot as usual.”

“Works for me,” he says.

They pass the time for a few miles like this, Lana snuggled into Jacobi’s shoulder despite the heat, and ribbing him unmercifully every time he makes a “stupid” choice. Jacobi returns the jabs, but he’s just a bit too tired of Kepler to put his whole heart into them. Finally Maxwell taps Kepler’s shoulder a little too firmly and hands him her phone when his hand appears over the backseat, triumphant. “Done,” she says, and leans over to mess up Jacobi’s hair.

“Ow.”

Kepler turns around, raises an eyebrow. “This is....Maxwell, this playlist is forty hours long.”

“Roughly the time it takes to get from Florida to California, with an extra five hours thrown in for insurance and traffic.” Maxwell beams.

Kepler makes a disgusted face. “Why have I heard of none of these?”

“Because, as I’ve stated before, you have terrible taste.”

He runs a hand across his forehead, glancing between the road and Maxwell’s face in the rearview mirror. “...if you say so, Doctor. Now, is Mr. Jacobi going to come back up here or are the two of you going to spend the entire drive from here to California sniggering like a couple of two year olds?”

“Why?” asks Jacobi, momentarily emboldened. “Jealous, sir?”

“I-jealousy is not an emotion that I am capable of having, Mr. Jacobi, sir.”

Lana sniggers. Jacobi tries to force the sudden blush from his face.

“And why would that be…?” mutters Jacobi, but he’s fairly certain that his voice is too low for Kepler to hear.

“Sir, can we stop for lunch?” asks Lana brightly. “I’m starved.”

“...of course, Doctor Maxwell. Where...would you like to go.”

“Burger King,” says Maxwell at the same time that Jacobi says “Dairy Queen.”

“Dairy Queen?” Kepler asks, incredulous. “My God, Jacobi, who eats at Dairy Queen? We’re going to Burger King.”

Lana raises an eyebrow mischievously at Jacobi. “Looks like I’m the favorite today.”

“The colonel does not have favorites,” says Jacobi.

“Depends on the day.” says Kepler lightly.

“You do not have favorites!”

Kepler chuckles, but doesn’t add anything more. They pull into the Burger King parking lot and Jacobi practically bolts, relieved to be outside, finally, relieved to feel the heat on his face, even, instead of the artificial tundra of Kepler’s company car (he suspects that Maxwell has somehow reprogrammed the air conditioning).

Maxwell is right behind him, and for a moment the two of them simply bask in the pain-pleasure of stretching out limbs that have been asleep for hours. The joy of getting out of a car after having been in it for at least a half eternity is severely underrated, Jacobi thinks.

It only lasts a moment though. There’s only so much obnoxious yawning Jacobi can do before realizing that Kepler is still in the car.

“Sir?” he calls.

“Coming, Jacobi. Sending a text. You and Maxwell go ahead inside.”

Jacobi quirks an eyebrow at Maxwell, but she just shrugs. Then she grabs his hand and practically drags him inside. “Come on, loser, I’m hungry.”

“Fine, coming...brat…”

He half smiles, while she’s looking at the menu. Maybe this trip won’t be as bad as he thought it would be.

The support beams are still tilting, though. There’s always been something connecting him to Warren Kepler-always-

He’s just not sure if there’s ever been anything connecting Kepler to him.

“ ‘Lana?” he asks, distracted.

“Hmm.”

“Kepler’s still in the car.” He’s looking through the grimy back window at the car. From this angle all he can see is Kepler’s hair, falling over his eyes. That can’t be regulation. Every few seconds he twitches, subconsciously, presumably trying to get his hair out of his eyes. Jacobi wants to smooth it off his forehead, maybe pin it back, give him a haircut, for God’s sake...or, no, honestly he wouldn’t have a problem just holding it out of his eyes. For, like, an hour or two. He could do that.

“Jacobi!” hisses Maxwell. “Could you not be a lovesick idiot for two seconds, maybe?”

“Wh-” Jacobi whips around. She’s dragged him to the front counter-he doesn’t remember that-and a fairly annoyed server asks “And you, sir?” for what is clearly not the first time.

“Uh-I’ll have-” his eyes flit over the menu but don’t take anything in. “Um-”

“Oh for-” Maxwell shoves him aside, none too gently. “He’ll have a number three combo, small Dr. Pepper. Thanks.” She scans her card and grabs the receipt, shoving it, crumpled, into her pocket before Jacobi’s thoughts can rearrange themselves into a sentence.

The server smiles tightly. “Coming right up.” She hands Jacobi a cup and he follows Maxwell, dazed. There’s...something wrong with him.

They sit down in the booth beside the window, close enough to the car that Kepler would’ve easily seen them, had they waved, had he looked up. But neither of those things happen.

Maxwell slides Jacobi’s drink across the table and frowned at him. “So, talk.”

“What?”

She reaches across their table and grabs both of his wrists, tugs him down to the table surface, glares at him. “You. The colonel. Something’s gotta give.”

“I…” Jacob tries, subconsciously, to scrub the blush from his face, but Maxwell still has a tight hold on both his wrists.

“Jacobi. Either make a move or stop-stop with the, the lovesick puppy act.”

Jacobi blinks. “Wait, I thought you hated it when we-”

“I do! I-” She grunts in frustration. “Jacobi,” she growls. “You’re too indecisive.”

He grins at her. “Aww, you do ship us.”

“So you admit it? You like Kepler?” Maxwell says quickly, in a clumsy attempt to regain her lead.

“You can’t one up me here, you just openly admitted that, while thinking on the idea of me and the colonel in a romantic relationship, you get warm and fuzzies?? Hmm?”

Alana rolls her eyes and drawls in a poor imitation of Kepler, “My ace ass ain’t admitting nothing, Mr. Jacobi.”

Jacobi chuckles, caught off guard by how easy it is to laugh when he’s not thinking of Kepler. When it’s not constantly between them. When he’s not thinking of the support beams and how it’s his job to keep them up.

“Mr. Jacobi, would you mind scooting over?”

“Wh-uh, of course, sir.”

Kepler scoots into the booth next to him, slides Maxwell’s and Jacobi’s trays in front of them. Jacobi tries not to looks. It’s weird to see him doing ordinary thing and now he’s caught in the uncomfortableness of not looking too much, not avoiding looking at him, trying to act normal, and shit why is it so hard to act normal around Kepler-

Maxwell catches his eye across the table and winks. He glares at her but can’t come up with a good enough comeback that’s Kepler safe, so he just takes a bite of his burger to have something to do. Maxwell steals a fry off his tray, and he swats her hand away. “You haff ‘ur owf!” he mumble yells at her through a mouthful.

“They taste better stolen,” says Maxwell, deadpan. “Hey, Warren, where’s yours?”

This is a game of theirs, to see how often they can get away with calling Kepler by his first name without having anything thrown at them or being threatened with bodily harm. Maxwell is the undisputed winner.

Kepler shifts, and Jacobi tries not to feel the heat radiating off his body. As if he had any choice. His shoulders roll back, he straightens, looks at Maxwell. “I have fries,” he says, gesturing at a tiny paper bag Jacobi didn’t even notice initially. “You and Jacobi go ahead. I’ll eat for real later.”

Maxwell shrugs. “Okay, sir.”

She swipes another fry from Jacobi’s tray, but this time he’s ready for it. His hand shoots out, catches her wrist, and they engage in a silent arm wrestling game for the fry, trying to smother their giggles in front of the other patrons. Kepler rolls his eyes.

“You two are absolute toddlers,” he says, but there’s the faintest glimmer of fondness in the words.

Maxwell wins, sticks her tongue out at Jacobi. “Sucker,” she purrs.

“Yeah, yeah.” He snatches a fry off of her tray when her back is turned and then nearly chokes trying to stuff it in his mouth, making Kepler snort. He tries to muffle it but Maxwell whips around anyway. “What?” she asks, and Kepler’s snort turns into full on laughter. Jacobi tries to keep a straight face but it’s damn near impossible.

“What?” says Maxwell louder. Jacobi just shakes his head. “Nothing, ‘Lana. Tell you later.”

He notices Kepler’s face twist out of the corner of his eye, but it isn’t from laughter. He glances at him, trying to look like he’s not looking. Kepler bites the corner of his lip and then stuffs a couple of fries in his mouth.

“Colonel, you okay?” asks Jacobi, in what he hopes to be the most nonchalant voice imaginable. There’s a split second of some unidentifiable emotion, directed at him, maybe surprise? And then it’s gone so fast that he’s sure he imagined it.

“Fine, Jacobi. Why wouldn’t I be?”

Chapter Two

#wolf 359 #si-5 #daniel jacobi #warren kepler #alana maxwell #kepcobi #podcasts #masq does a thing #tw: self harm #tw: scars

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pingou7 · 7 years

Photo

A car, two cops and a stardust — a RebelCaptain road trip fic

by @pingou7 pingou for @thestarbirdfromtheashes Starbird

(aka the Road trip fic Diego Luna’s filmography made me write)

Read and enjoy, and please consider leaving me a few words.

Summary:

As the dusty roads criss under Kes Dameron’s old car, Cassian Andor lets the wind mess with his hair through the open window. Dust, sunshine, laughter, its easy to recapture the taste of days long gone.

(…)

At a gas station near Corpus Chirsti, when they climb back after taking a piss, both jump out of their skins as a random brunette, eyes thunderous, hisses dangerously from the backseat:

"Just pretend I'm not here."

UPDATE: Part 2 is up! Read on AO3 (or under the cut)

Part 2 — From Texas to Las Cruces, NM. Day 1

“So you're going to Mexico?” Jyn frowns, “But you still plan to drive all the way to San Diego? Doesn't that make a good detour?”

“Yep, more than three thousands miles in all, and around forty eight hours of driving, with only four or five stops in between. We're pretty stubborn like that.”

It's obvious she tries to envision the travel ahead, but it's true that from an outsider’s point of view, the trip in itself doesn't make much sense. If she's to stay with them, then, there's no harm in sharing little bits of information. Seeing Kes is focused on his driving and not inclined to volunteer — for once — Cassian cranks his neck to look at her, preparing to be as concise as possible:

“You're obviously allowed to drop out whenever you wish, Jyn. We promised to turn up to San Diego, to visit an old aunt before our usual stay at Bernal in the state of Querétaro. We were born there, so we usually spend a few days, enjoying the sights, the food, visit the cemetery or attend mass... that sort of thing.”

“Are you religious?” she asks, playing with some kind of rough crystal around her neck.

"Not really,” Kes answers because Cassian never really knows what to say, “we're doing stuff out of habit I guess. One time, we rolled over a vulture so Cassian buried it and I lit a candle. Wished it a better journey to the afterlife. My wife gave us shit about it, but the woman who raised us was really... spiritual and set in her ways."

“You're not related though?”

“No,” Cassian says tersely, wanting them to drop the subject, because yes, not only is he chivalrous, paranoid and superstitious, but he's also not ready to expose his nonexistent family history.

“I understand. Biologically I'm an only child, but Bodhi is my brother.”

Not her boyfriend then, though the information shouldn't make any difference to him. She doesn't elaborate on her life, and Cassian doesn't feel like prying — not right away, that is — but he still plans to involve Kay if she stays mysterious. Kes turns off the radio completely, which doesn't bode well for her: with a driving session of more than ten hours ahead, it means that he expects his passengers to fill the silence… finally Andor would gladly take back his questionable love songs.

“So, Jyn. Mind if we chat a bit? If we are to spend the next two days together — at least — then we have to cover the basics.”

Smooth, Dameron, Cassian mouths drily, and Kes offers him an half-smile in return. Jyn isn't fooled either and her breath is close enough to reach Cassian's neck somehow, as she bends forward in the middle:

“Do we now, officer?” her wry accent — British, he surmises — bringing Kay to mind, but the tone is far too playful to be his.

“It's Sergeant Kes Dameron and Captain Cassian Andor, actually.”

“I thought you were on vacation though, and I'm in no mood for an interrogation.”

“C’mon, it's not as bad as that. We're road tripping so, let's just say we're gonna play a good old game of twenty questions, to get to know each other.”

“Your car, your rules, but I can refuse to answer whenever I wish.”

She throws a hard bargain, but it's better than nothing, so Cassian concedes:

“That's fair, but no lying.”

“Okay, shoot.”

“What did you want to do when you were a kid?”

If she'd expected to identify herself right away, she’s mistaken. Even on the fly, they're good at their job, especially Cassian, and eventually they will succeed at cracking her shell. For now they can have fun.

“I wanted to be an Astrophysicist,” she smiles — despite appearances, she's a brainy one then, and it's oddly specific for that not to be a clue. “You?”

“Kes wanted to be a singer, and I a dancer.”

“We would have been great as a two men band too, we even had a name: los Charolastras,” Dameron adds so wistfully she lets out a little chuckle. “My son is four, he wants to be a pilot.”

“My brother is one, he's the pilot,” she volunteers, like there's something funny about the words. “So, my turn, Charolastras, what food can't you stand?”

“Why? Do you plan on cooking us something as a thanks?”

“Or poison us and go on your merry way?”

“You really are paranoid, you know,” she mumbles, looking at Cassian with narrowed eyes through the mirror. “Just seemed a harmless question to me. Mine is mushrooms.”

“Avocado,” Cassian spits out while Kes sighs.

“Please don't get him started on his hate for avocados, Guacamole included, and yes, we're still Mexicans by birth. It borders on obsession. I don't have food I particularly dislike. Okay, Middle name.”

She doesn't answer instantly — too close, too soon then — but to their surprise, she says:

“I tend to change if I need to, but since you know my name is Jyn, I'll just say I'm biologically named after my mother and leave it as that.”

Well, she's not avoiding the question and likely not lying either, so Kes smiles appreciatively as he answers:

“Mine is Rodrigo and Cassian's is Jerón. Your turn, cabrón.”

“What's your nickname?”

“I don't have one these days. My friends call me little sister, my guardian used to call me child, when he felt particularly warm, but… my parents, they called me Stardust.”

There's a mine of information here, from the order she gave to the way she phrased it and even the nickname themselves. Cassian commits it all to memory before he replies:

“I hate being called Cass, so naturally Kes and his wife call me that frequently.”

“When we were boys, in Bernal, some called you rudo, while I was cursí, remember? Hated that. Cass and Kes-adillas sounds better.”

It's absurd, but it makes everyone snigger. The question game keeps the conversation flowing, she's sassy and overall drier than Shara, and despite the situation, they are relatively clicking together, or at least they make the most of it. The drive towards San Diego is surprisingly going well, as the sun goes slowly down while they're crossing the whole of Texas.

Of course they are suspicious, but they can't force her to spill the beans or she’s sure to bolt at the nearest occasion. Cassian has taken on low-key texting Kay with the few pieces of information she'd shared — in case he could be more talkative than she is — between succinct updates to Shara on their progress.

As he gets tired, Kes is a little less easygoing though: he underestimated Jyn, he had not talked to his son since they left, and he worries about how they're gonna find things in San Diego. She seems to detect the tension slowly growing, perhaps because she's unsettled too, up to the point she admits Kes shouldn't make such a face, since she hasn't done anything truly reprehensible to them, so far:

“Technically, we could arrest you for trespassing and assault on two officers. But fate brought us together, so it will have to hold.”

“Great. I've already have too many things on my plate already. And for the record, I may have ‘popped up on your back seat’ but I have assaulted neither of you… yet.”

That gets a smile out of the guys, and Kes resumes on humming. Another quarter with the radio back on, and she dozes until they reach Las Cruces in New Mexico around 2AM. By then they are sore and Kes keeps grumbling about his burning eyes and the fact that Shara has most likely been asleep for ages along with Poe. Cassian, for one, is more than ready to take his place, because he keeps imagining who could chase her and her father. Kay said he wouldn't respond to any more texts of his as long as he has no further details to provide — not to mention he should respect his privacy, if not that of the fugitive.

After a quick stop at a drive-thru (Jyn keeps her head down and only takes a chocolate milkshake and a doughnut, that she pays cash) they switch places, Kes spreading himself in the back and closing his eyes.

Andor takes the wheel, almost feeling young again, adjusting the rear view mirror with the tiny dream catcher, a souvenir from almost another lifetime. Only there's a woman in the passenger seat, and up close, he can almost see her vibrate with tension, her eyes clearly betraying how on edge she still is. He knows she's into rock, while he's more a folk person — curtesy of the game — so he wants to let her chose the station. More than gallantry, he counts on the soothing effects of a music that's not as atrocious as Dameron’s playlist. She politely declines, almost demurely, and while she stares at his cell phone a bit too long, she refuses it also.

“Bodhi needs his sleep and I should stick to a minimum of contact, Captain.”

“It tempts you though, if you want, you can borrow Dameron’s phone this time, if it secures you.”

“I have two cops basically escorting me, for all intents and purposes, so I’m more secure right now than I’ve been since I was a child. It’s him I worry about. But it’s nice of you to offer, the phone and letting me tag along. I appreciate it more than you know.”

“Then I wouldn’t mind knowing exactly why you’re so appreciative.”

“I’m sure you wouldn’t,” Jyn smiles, but there’s no amusement behind it, “the thing is... it’s bigger than two cops and a crappy car can protect me from.”

Cassian frowns at her certainty, but doesn’t insist. Perhaps she’s right, and if not, he and Kes could persuade her, eventually. There’s still time (he doesn’t need a GPS app to know they are approximately again 10 hours away from their Californian check point) before whatever will happen next.

Once in San Diego, maybe Jyn will disappear as suddenly as she first appeared. Maybe once Kes and him will have seen Tía, it won’t matter anyway. Maybe Shara will forever regret she did not accompany them. Either way, the answer awaits on the other side of the country, so he drives on the I-8 and hopes for the best. An inner voice that sounds a lot like Kay’s pops up likely but unpleasant scenarios at each road sign though. Kes being out for the foreseeable future means that he cannot balance his tendency to overthink things.

The city lights dance on her face every time he steals a glance at her. But, judging on her faraway yet awake demeanor, he’s not the only one silently berating himself. Nobody turned on the radio but the silence is awfully loud in the car. He knows Kes is sleeping but he doesn’t snore — Shara is pretty lucky, he guesses — yet Cassian wouldn’t mind to have some other sound besides the motor. It could be a subject of mockery, if nothing else, perhaps some more goofing, even at Kes’s expense, would ease her mind, and his in turn.

She musts be exhausted — who knows what she was doing and where was she coming from before he insisted on picking her up? — but her posture stays rigid even as her head starts to droop repeatedly.

“Jyn, you can sleep a bit, I’m the king of driving by night, you’re safe, I promise.”

“I’m never safe,” she mumbles closing her eyes, “but just in case, wake me up before you get sleepy too. I’d hate to die like this.”

“Now, who’s paranoid?”

She can’t even muster a response, and he turns the radio on mellow songs, low enough so he wouldn’t wake anyone, but it’s better than listening to his own thoughts. Cassian likes driving at night, he doesn’t need much sleep anyway and the traffic is lessened, even on such frequented highway. Next to him, she jolts awake after some time though, frowning sleepily.

“What’s wrong?”

“‘m cold.”

With a multi pocketed but sleeveless vest and a mere camisole, he would be too. Then again, he gets cold relatively easily, so he replies:

“Look Jyn, turn around and take my jacket, the blue fur coated one. I don’t need it. The car heater is not good and I’m not sure it would be safe to use.”

“If you’re sure you won’t need it, thanks.”

“No problem.”

She puts it on stiffly, the brawl at the Texan gas station plus so many hours sitting in a car likely taking their toll on her. The back of her hand hits his briefly on the driving stick and it’s like a jolt of electricity again.

She sighs — maybe it’s not just one sided then, and she’s feeling too? — snuggle in a bit beside him, and he finds this kind of cute. Then he wants to slap himself at how infatuated this looks like, but her eyes are already beginning to flutter. She’s still struggling anyhow, not the type to surrender easily, until Cassian feels obliged to say:

“Don’t be stubborn, just lie down across the seat.”

“Aye Captain,” she grumbles making him smile.

#rebelcaptain #fanfiction #cassian andor #jyn erso #kes dameron #modern au #roadtrip #pingou writes

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irarelypostanything · 7 years

Text

Leftover

Every week, I volunteered at the soup kitchen. The best thing about this was telling people I volunteered at the soup kitchen. It could have been in any conversation, maybe at work or maybe at the bar, when I’d tell everyone in earshot about the constant contributions I made to society.

But this story isn’t about the soup kitchen, and this story isn’t about me (actually it kind of is, but not entirely). This story is about David, a college student I met there. David was promising, intelligent, and...for reasons I will soon discuss...the reason I no longer volunteer at the soup kitchen.

Glide Memorial is located on Ellis street, within walking distance of Powell Station and surprisingly close to Ghirardelli Chocolate. You can actually see the neighborhood get poorer as you walk towards it, starting with the hotel where rich people stay and ending with the sidewalk where homeless people sleep. Outside it smells of piss and sweat, but inside is fairly decent.

We had all sorts of volunteers, mostly high school students filling in their mandatory hours, but occasionally we’d get a college student like Michelle. She had one of those last names that made it difficult to look her up on Facebook (not that I ever tried that).

I signed in at the front desk, glad to see that Michelle’s name was already down. I went through the usual motions. First was the handwash, which lasted however long it took to mentally sing “happy birthday” (I was probably one of the only people who followed this rule). Then came the gloves and hair net. Last, and this was my favorite part, I’d pick a random high school student and tell him to clear the sink for cooking. Clearly I looked older, so high school volunteers usually listened to me.

“Hey,” I said rudely, tapping the first person I could find on the shoulder, “mind washing these dishes? I need the sink clear.”

“Sure,” he said brightly. When he turned around to acknowledge me, I could see that he probably wasn’t a high school student at all. “I’m David, by the way.”

“Dan. Are you from a high school?”

“No, I’m a law student at the University of San Francisco. Why, are you?” I actually don’t know why he asked that. Obviously I wasn’t.

“I work at City Hall.”

“Doing what?”

“Data entry. Let’s go downstairs.”

“Didn’t you need the dishes cleared?”

“Nah.”

The upstairs of Glide Memorial is something of a mini-kitchen, but downstairs is where things really happen. There’s a much larger kitchen, adjacent to which is a serving queue. Past that are enough tables to serve 200 people, and they have a sign to confirm this.

The two of us started cooking. Somewhere there was a volunteer coordinator, but I didn’t bother to check.

Michelle was already here. Talking to her was my second favorite part, but that night she really hit it off with David. Oh my gosh, you go to USF, too? Wow, I’m also in the law school. Hey, we have the same professor! God, that midterm was so hard. Occasionally I’d interrupt to ask for a spatula or something, but that was pretty much it.

The interesting thing about staying in a large city is that you can do the same thing for years, but change will still happen around you. San Francisco was growing a lot. I don’t know if the change was good, and I’m not someone who likes to discuss my opinions at length.

Every time I returned to the soup kitchen to volunteer, the two of them would be talking. I would eavesdrop. David seemed to show no interest in her, romantically, and maybe it was his lack of interest that made them connect so well.

Seeing David every time was a change in routine...at first. But then it became the new routine, and time went on as it always had. Days were long. Weeks were short. Alongside Glide Memorial and Netflix and all the other random things I did on the Internet, work continued on. Everyone at the office was always really bored, but our boss understood where we were coming from. She let us listen to music as we worked and pretty much take breaks whenever we wanted. In fact, if I remember correctly, the job description originally said “Note: This job is really, really boring.”

Eventually there was a change, and maybe I should have seen it coming.

I don’t want to disappoint you by saying that something big happened between David and me. To be frank, almost nothing happened at all. It’s the fact that something almost happened that made me decide to avoid David altogether from that day on.

We agreed to go drinking after our shift one night, something that already struck me as different. I didn’t even know if he was of legal drinking age, but I honestly didn’t care if he wasn’t.

He said he was short on cash, so we just bought some IPA at Walgreens and drunk at the park. It was that tiny little park, the one across the street from City Hall where we held a rally so many years ago. In my mind’s eye, I saw myself in high school climbing to the roof of a nearby storage container with my friends. I remember wondering where all of them were now.

He didn’t say a word the whole time we sat there. It was the first time we really hung out at all.

“Where’s your car?” he finally asked, when we were done.

“I don’t drive.”

“Why not? Do you not have a license?”

“I do, I just don’t really like being behind the wheel.”

“My car’s nearby. I can drive you home.”

It didn’t sound like a bad idea at the time. David had had two, maybe three beers at the most. I was the one was actually kind of drunk, and riding in a car sounded a lot better than riding Muni.

It was night, and it was getting kind of late.

When you drive someone, there’s a universal rule that you’re supposed to play upbeat, mainstream music. Ideally you should have these songs on a playlist, but if you must use the radio then it has to be an upbeat, mainstream channel that preferably can be categorized as “easy listening.”

David did the opposite. He must have had a CD called “disturbing music,” because that’s all I heard. First it was “Climbing up the Walls,” the least upbeat Radiohead song I knew.

We were slowly edging out of downtown and making our way to the freeway. His speed increased considerably when he merged onto it; he was one of those drivers. I enjoyed looking out the window because Muni was underground. You pass all sorts of houses when you put enough distance from downtown, and they’re not nice. This is the part of San Francisco you’ll never see on a poster, or a Woody Allen movie, or the website background on one of those emerging tech companies.

He played “Goodbye,” by Apparat. Hearing the song for the first time was...an experience. I never figured out if it was about depression, rape, or both, but the tune was chilling enough for either subject.

He was going about 90. He still hadn’t spoken for the entire ride, which seemed out of character for him.

“If you were to die right now,” he said, as if that were a normal way to break the ice, “how would you feel about your life?”

“What?”

We seemed to slide the slightest bit toward the lane of oncoming traffic, but I thought I was only imagining it.

“Have you seen ‘Fight Club’?”

“No.”

Okay, so maybe he was just making a reference. I didn’t want to think about this. There were some things on my mind, probably small, but I wanted to go home and think about them.

Not a minute later, he pulled the stunt again. This time, it was clear that he was edging toward the wrong lane. But just as quickly he brought the car back, swerving, and the combined movement was so fast I didn’t even have time to shout.

“What are you doing?” I tried to sound angry, but didn’t. It’s like I was dreaming.

“Do you want to die, Dan? Every time we talk, you tell me that you want to die.”

Did I? Maybe I had mentioned things like this before, but I was only joking.

“I joke around a lot. I don’t want to die.”

“You constantly tell me that life is meaningless.” Hm...he had a point there. I definitely said that to him on occasion, and we had been talking for months.

“I didn’t mean that I wanted to die, and I was kidding!” I really was. My way of joking was by saying things that were bleak, constantly. He’s the one who took me too seriously.

“No no no,” he said, and the car was picking up speed, “you’re right. You understand. There’s no reason to live. Everyone is going to die. Why not get on with it?”

My head was still throbbing, and the car’s speed didn’t help a bit. I tried to think of something intelligent to say but my head still hurt. “No one wants to die. Really.” I emphasized that last word, like I was pleading.

“Everyone wants to die,” he said. “They just haven’t realized it yet.”

“I don’t want to die,” I said.

“Yes you do. I can tell.”

“What about the person you hit? What if they don’t want to die?”

“We’ll hit a truck. They’ll be fine.”

This time I grabbed the wheel, and I held it steady. He didn’t provide much resistance. He probably wanted the car crash to involve only a few people.

I didn’t really know that much about this guy. I guess I sort of made up a person, called him David, and then didn’t give it another thought.

My adult community service club held weekly meetings, and all of our officers spoke very highly of David. Here he was, this ambitious, bright new member who seemed like he could really bridge the gap between our older members and our younger ones. We started to talk a little bit about his background, but at that point he was just another person. He was a person, but he was still just another person.

“David,” I said, still guiding the wheels, “what is it you think you’re doing?”

“Oh my God,” he said. The car began to slow, but not so much that it was dangerous.

“Exit here and let me off as soon as you can,” I said. I couldn’t believe my luck. It’s like he was in a trance for a few minutes and was just now snapping out of it.

“Okay,” he said.

He offered to finish taking me home, but I said I would call an Uber. He seemed to understand. He reacted the way a driver might react if I just realized his car was unsafe, or he wasn’t actually licensed. He also looked scared, and even after all this time I can’t make sense of what happened. Is he like two people? Was he possessed by one thought in one instance?

“Dan?” he asked me, uncertainly.

“Yeah?”

“Please don’t tell anyone about this.”

“I won’t.” And I didn’t.

There’s this really shitty coffee shop about two blocks from City Hall. The coffee isn’t great and I don’t trust the neighborhood, but the owner is nice and there’s rarely many other people there. So I can think.

I would use their wi-fi and for a long time, I would just check in on David. I didn’t follow or friend him on anything, at any point, but I still felt like I knew him from this. I could trace his steps.

And he seemed fine. I can’t think of any other way to put it.

I started volunteering at the SF Marin Food Bank, instead of the soup kitchen. It’s the same idea, only the coordinators are way nicer and you don’t have many interactions with people.

I received no indication that anything with David was wrong, and three years passed. He’s still fine.

So I just went back to my life, and he went back to his, and that was that.

#short story #fiction

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itshorridsam · 4 years

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youtube

GTA ONLINE | SUMMER SPECIAL UPDATE | 2X CASH AND RP | NEW MISSIONS, VEHICLES, PATCHES | DISCOUNTS!!!!

What's up lovely people! How are you all doing? Hope you guys are staying safe and doing great! I am HorridSam and today we are gonna talk about recently released summmer update of GTA online!!!

The GTA Online Summer 2020 DLC Update arrives in Southern San Andreas TODAY, August 11, adding a mix of new activities and content to the game’s massive host of features.

New "A Super Yacht Life" Missions Owners of the Galaxy Super Yacht are now able to participate in 6 new Co-Op missions for 1-4 players:

*Missions involve deep-sea diving and high-speed action on the seas

*The missions can be accessed from the Bridge of the Yacht, or by calling the Yacht *Captain and selecting ‘Request a Job’

*The payout of these new missions is between $14,000 - $25,000

New Diamond Adversary Series A range of new Adversary Modes taking place inside The Diamond Casino & Resort has been added to GTA Online.

The Diamond Adversary Series features variants of these eight existing Adversary Modes, for 4-8 players:

*Entourage

*Every Bullet Counts

*Hardest Target

*Juggernaut

*Kill Quota

*Resurrection

*Slasher

*Trading Places

15 New Vehicles New Super Cars & Sports Cars

*Lampadati Tigon ($ 2,310,000)

*Invetero Coquette D10 ($ 1,510,000)

2 new Open Wheel Cars (Formula 1)

*Benefactor BR8 ($ 3,400,000)

*Declasse DR1 ($ 2,997,000)

Southern San Andreas Super Autos

*Maibatsu Penumbra FF ($ 1,380,000)

*BF Club ($ 1,280,000)

*Dundreary Landstalker XL ($ 1,220,000)

*Imponte Beater Dukes ($ 378,000)

*Canis Seminole Frontier ($ 678,000)

Six existing vehicles have been made available for purchase with new upgrade conversions at Benny's Original Motor Works:

*Benefactor Glendale

*Bravado Gauntlet Classic

*Bravado Youga Classic

*Declasse Yosemite

*Vapid Peyote

*Albany Manana Open Wheel Races & Creator

*9 new Open Wheel Races have been added to GTA Online

*You are now able to design your own street circuit with the new Open Wheel Race Creator

GTA Online Title Update 1.50 / 1.51 Other Patch Notes

*Two new Business Battles have been added to GTA Online.

Compete over eight packages (instead of two) in some surprising locations for serious rewards:

*Aircraft Carrier Assault

*Factory Raid

*Two additional Apartments / Garage Slots have been added, giving players the ability to own up to 8 now!

*Two new Arcade Games have been added for the Retro Arcade Business:

-Ace of Fury ($666,000)

-QUB3D ($333,000)

*New Stolen Movie Prop Collectibles have been added to GTA Online: -Solomon hires you to find his stolen movie props.

-Find and return all 10 movie props to Solomon for rewards.

*You can now return your Personal Vehicle to Storage without registering as MC

*Added a timer to the Lucky Wheel: the game will now tell you how much time you have to wait before you can spin it again.

*Staying stationary or driving the wrong way in an Open Wheel Races now makes you non-contact.

*15 new Off-Road Wheels have been added at Los Santos Customs Mod Shops.

*30 new Street Wheels have been added at Los Santos Customs Mod Shops. *Over 200+ new Clothing Items items and variations have been added for male and female characters.

*Calls from LJT have now been reduced to text messages

*One new ‘Drug Vehicle’ Random Encounter has been added to GTA Online. *Fixed the color of the Supplies and Stock bars in the Master Control Terminal *The Arcade Game "Street Crimes: Gang Wars Edition" can now be played as Single Player against AI opponents

*As part of the GTA Online Update 1.50 / 1.51, there have been a number of general improvements and fixes

*Plus, the usual weekly special events and bonuses will take place over the coming months.

Hope you guys will love it!

Leave a like on the video!!!

And it would be a request not to forget the most important part is to subscribe right on my channel and please support me on my journey in YouTube!!

Also don't forget to turn on notification bell to catch up with my videos which I will upload on my channel and join Horrid Army today!!!

Stay Safe and be Horrid 😈

With love,

HorridSam Catch my other gameplays -

*Catch Call Of Duty Modern Warfare Remastered playlist - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bCeK7...

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#gta online dlcgta online new dlcgta online new updatenew updatenew dlcnew carsupdatesdlcnew dlc updatedlc updatesummer dlcdlc 2020summer upd

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eldritchsurveys · 4 years

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925.

5k Survey XLIII

2201. Do you have a favorite song by The Cure? >> Fascination Street. 2202. Are there things you’ve never told for fear that others would judge you? >> Sure. There’s a lot of weird shit in my history that I don’t want to tell the average person because the average person just isn’t tactful or particularly compassionate in their reactions, in my experience. 2203. Do you have a favorite Glen Miller song? >> I don’t even know who that is. 2204. Can sex ever be casual? >> Of course it can be. It just isn’t for me, so I prefer not to have casual sex. (Or any sex, but that’s beside the point.) 2205. Who was the last person to let you down? >> I don’t know.

2206. Do others feel that you expect too much of them? >> I don’t know if others feel that way. 2207. Did you forgive the last person who hurt you? >> No. 2208. Does one bad deed outshine many good deeds? >> Negativity bias makes it feel that way sometimes, especially since I’m already sensitive to bad behaviour since I’ve dealt with so much of it. But I recognise that it’s an unfair and unnecessarily intense way to think, so when I can overcome that negativity bias, I try to. 2209. Would you like to go on television to receive a make-over? >> Fuck no. 2210. What will no one ever see you do? >> Anything I do Inworld. 2211. Are you quick to anger? >> No. 2212. Are you slow to forgive? >> Yes. 2213. Do most people around you have a positive attitude? >> No, most people around me have a pretty realistic attitude about how fucked up many things are. Some people are more pessimistic about it than others, and others are more hopeful and determined to do something about the fucked-up-ness (which is probably my favourite kind of “positive” attitude), but I don’t hang around people who are overly positive in their disposition, because excessive positivity is just disturbing to me. 2214. What do you need help with? >> A lot of things. 2215. Do you know a lot about geography? >> No. 2216. Do you take the easy way out of things? >> Sometimes. It’s not like I have an unlimited amount of energy to just be expending on every fucking task. 2217. What is your favorite fabric to wear? >> Cotton, I guess. Whatever’s soft and durable. 2218. Would you finish this survey if it went up to 10,000 questions? >> I don’t know. I think 5000 is more than enough, though. 2219. Would you rather visit the desert or the rainforest? >> The desert. I’d love to see the rainforest too, but I prioritise desert because there’s less bugs, lol. 2220. What does Domo Oregato Mister Roboto actually mean? >> I’m not Google. 2221. Do you still make a wish when you blow out your birthday candles? >> I don’t make wishes or blow out birthday candles. 2222. Make a wish now: >> What did I just say? 2223. Do you look for four leaf clovers? >> No. 2224. What are you the guardian of? >> Inworld. 2225. Do you treat people differently based on their appearance? >> I try not to. 2226. Are you for or against censoring child pornography? >> I think it’s best for everyone that we continue criminalising the creation and sharing of child pornography. 2227. Are naked child images in paintings more acceptable than photographs of naked children? >> This is my opinion, yes. It’s the exploitation and unavoidable harm to real life children that I’m concerned about, not the fact that there’s some naked-baby cherubs flying around in a Renaissance painting or whatever. 2228. Now that we can create such lifelike digital images, do you think it should be allowed for digital child pornography to exist (as in there were no children involved in the porn, it is all digitally made, the kids aren’t real, they just look real)? >> Oh, I’ve heard of this. I’m not sure how I feel about the fact that this is even a dilemma, but what I will say is that if watching some VR toddlers prevents someone from harming an actual real-life child, then you know what, at least there’s that. 2229. Do you like wheel of fortune or jeopardy better? >> Jeopardy!. I sometimes learn random shit from that show. 2230. Are you a fan of the Clash? >> I’m not familiar enough with their music to say. 2231. How do you feel about Jerry Orbuch’s passing on? >> I don’t know who that is. Or, er, was. 2232. What celebrity are you dreading the future death of? >> I haven’t really thought about it. I did experience what it was like to have a celebrity I felt an emotional attachment to die (David Bowie), and I gotta say, it wasn’t that bad. It just made me sentimental and kind of sweetly sorrowful -- the Blackstar album definitely contributed to that feeling. 2233. Are you a fan of Joy Division? >> Not really. I’d listen to them if they were on, but I don’t have any of their songs saved to Spotify. 2234. If you were going to ‘make over’ your diary what theme would you give it? >> --- 2235. What is your favorite tarot deck? >> Right now, it’s the Starman Tarot. It’s so beautiful. I also have Prisma Visions which is lovely, and Quantum Tarot which I haven’t used in years and honestly forget I own most of the time. Necronomicon Tarot is another favourite of mine -- that was my first deck, way back when. 2236. How do you feel about file sharing (especially movies and music)? >> I support it. 2237. How do you feel about wicca and paganism? >> I find all the iterations interesting. 2238. Do you believe that people who practice the above religions are able to accomplish magic? >> I think accomplished practitioners are certainly doing something. I mean, honestly, witchcraft in its myriad forms has endured for so long that there has to be a reason why people keep doing this stuff. It’s a lot of work, man, I can’t imagine they’d be doing it for nothing, lmao. 2239. If you were given the opportunity to lead a creative writing program for a small group of students in a high school with a low budget in generally poor neighborhood, would you do it? >> I don’t think I’m qualified to do that, but if I was, absolutely. The creative writing group in high school was one of the few places I felt absolutely supported (for that short period of time, until my father made me stop going >.>). 2240. If you could pick anyone who would you want living next door to you? >> I don’t know who I’d want for a neighbour. Someone quiet who minds their business unless explicitly interacted with, for sure. 2241. If you were a tarot card which one would you be? >> The Alien from the Starman Tarot (he’s what would be The Hermit in a regular deck). 2242. Should high school cafeterias stop serving Twinkies and other fatty foods? >> Yes. 2243. Would you rather that McDonald’s took a lot of fat out of their fries even if they wouldn’t taste as good? >> Didn’t they try that at one point, like they switched up the kind of oil they used or something? I feel like they ended up switching back, though. Anyway, this is irrelevant to me because I don’t usually eat there (which I think is the best move, overall). 2244. Do you neglect your friends when you have a significant other? >> This isn’t something I’ve ever understood, no. 2245. Do you think that an advertisement for a cake decorating set would make good song lyrics? >> I don’t know. 2246. Would a band that used this ad for song lyrics take off or just fizzle out? >> I don’t know??? 2247. Are you more practical or imaginative? >> I hope I’m a reasonable combination of both. 2248. Can you see beautiful colors without closing your eyes? >> ???? 2249. What are the four best songs or bands to listen to while making love? >> Personally, I’ve had some great Inworld experiences while listening to this Mandy-related playlist I have saved on Spotify. 2250. What do you believe in? >> Hm.

#surveys #survey #5000 question survey

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nightmarecatart · 6 years

Text

Forevermore (Preview)

This is a project I have been working on for NaNoWriMo (2018), not entirely sure where I’m going with it but I have completed the first 50,000 words. Current title for this story is Forevermore, however it may change as the story develops. Feedback appreciated.

www.nightmarecat.wordpress.com

Dreams. I have dreams that break reality. As a child I believed in fairies. It wasn’t a normal childhood fantasy, they haunted me to the point my parents figured I needed help, nothing worked. As an adult, it’s hard to say you don’t believe in something, when there’s a constant vision of them every day. The fairies aren’t the tiny things people are led to believe, instead they looked like humans with the exception of the unique brilliant design of wings on their backs. Everyone would turn saying, “Blair’s a strange girl.” Only my grandmother would believe me after she found me out in the woodlands when I was a child. I had been following the little lights that were dancing around me. From that day I was forbidden from going in the woods and I hardly ever saw granny again.

It’s because of Granny Malina I was now heading back to my home village in the North of Scotland. My parents, god rest their souls, decided after a heated argument when I was 7, I shouldn’t really see her. She is my fathers’ mother but from what I recall of her, unlike my dad, she has a strong belief of otherworldly things. Pretty sure, if there was a way to become a fairy, Malina would take it in a heartbeat. Her little cottage was always decorated like a fairy princess palace. It’s been 18 years since that whole turn of events. On my 25thbirthday a few weeks ago, like the place was calling me back again, it was discovered granny had terminal cancer.

Happy Birthday, Blair and by the way the only person who did not think you are crazy or have some sort of mental illness is dying. The whole family although small figured it would be better if we could all come together and give her a family orientated final few weeks, heaven knows with how disjointed the family is she needed it.

“For Heavens sake learn how to bloody drive!” I screamed at the guy who had just cut me off on the motorway. My aunt Mysie, who had been looking after me for the past 12 years in the North of England, she nearly had a heart attack when she discovered I wanted to learn how to drive. Probably a good reason, with my red hair the stereotypical anger had to come out somewhere. Turns out I’m a bitch for road rage. My personality might have been one reason. The other reason was I believe she still thought there might be a trigger for overwhelming trauma there.

I mirrored the sign the guy in front of my had just given me as I overtook him again. Ah the human race despite the fact it is throwing it down with rain we still stop to roll down windows and give rude hand gestures.

“It was your fault moron!” I grumbled slapping the steering wheel, I should just be thankful I didn’t crash, my insurance was already at a maximum I could afford after accidentally knocking over my ex-best friend’s scooter when I found out she had been sleeping with the now ex-boyfriend… Like I said road rage, that and they both deserved it.

I’m seeing this get away as a holiday. Maybe a mind opener and something will hit me. Though I have a feeling I need to close my mind. Six psychiatrists later and the fairies still haunt me. In childhood it was put down to an over active imagination and I’ll grow out of it. As soon as I hit sixteen that’s when they started throwing about diagnosis’s like psychosis and schizophrenia. Deep down inside of me I know I’m mentally ok, although according to a few psychiatrists me thinking I don’t have a problem is a sign I have a problem, I tested out a theory with one of them by suggesting that I did have a mental health issue and I was discharged. Turns out, insanity can be classed as sanity these days. All of them recently agreed though I need to talk about what happened at my parent’s death. That like the police report was a case closed matter. And that’s how I’ll remain on it. I am not expecting this holiday to suddenly hit me with some life altering information. Then I’ll get home and write a best seller and me and J.K Rowling will be laughing it up over Cosmo’s or whatever those British people drink, though in my world give me a pint any day.

The last time I had breached my home village boundary was for the funeral of my parents. Not that there was much left of the bodies… the explosion took care of that. This time it looks like I’ll be leaving after another funeral. I did hope there would be some miracle cure, but I had enough therapy running through me that I knew the reality of things.

Instead of taking one journey I had decided, it would be better for mine and everyone’s lives if I had a stop over in Edinburgh. That way I wouldn’t be too tired from driving and I’d have a day to acclimatise to the Scottish environment again. Also, my family would have chance to get together, gossip and figure out how they were going to keep me from my grandmother and how to keep me hidden the rest of my life. I remember going to Edinburgh as a child before getting moved to England to live with my mother’s sister. Driving through it now, the buildings seem less daunting and scary and the crowds less anxiety provoking. On the other hand, everything in this world as a child was terrifying to me.

From Newcastle to Inverness it, according to Google Maps anyway, it would take five hours to get there. I figured although I am desperate to see Malina again I needed time to sort myself out. And I doubted I could sit in my car for five hours without ending up submitting to the temptations of blaring out Chris Rea’s “Road to Hell,” If it appeared on my playlist. I pulled into the village near Queensferry. I chose the place I was stopping at, at random and due to the fact, it was close to the bridge I needed to cross in the morning. I shivered at the forest I had passed to get here, damning myself for not doing my research properly. It was bad enough I was going back to a place with a large wood on its doorstep but stopping my first night in a place I didn’t know which also involved a large mass of trees this was asking for trouble.

Dragging my bag out of the car I got the feeling it was a typical village. Everyone knew each other and from the glances the place I was staying at was one of those inns that was there to more say they had one rather than for tourists. The musky smelling reception even had one of those bells, which I took pleasure in ringing profusely, on the ancient wooden desk.

“Can I help?” A bored voice sounded before an old lady appeared from a back room.

“I booked a room?” I had to question it considering I reserved it online and this place looked as if it hadn’t even seen dial up never mind WiFi. She smiled before shocking me and pulling out a Microsoft Surface tablet. Is it wrong to now expect my room to have a jacuzzi bath and a 40-inch TV with Netflix?

“What’s your name lassie?”

I sighed before giving my name, the familiarity of the Scottish accent made me feel warm inside, finally I felt home for the first time in ages.

“Room 4. It’s just up the stairs.”

No surprise, the room didn’t have a 40-inch tv. I think I am just thankful for the basic bath and TV though. I am just praying this place has hot water. I needed a soak. I didn’t exactly leave Mysie on good terms. She was adamant I wasn’t leaving. To which my reply was something along the lines of, I’m 25 and I can take care of myself. Thinking back at it probably not the right thing to say as that now leaves me wondering if I have a home to go back too. She’ll forgive me. Mysie had a memory of a goldfish, in my teenage years I constantly got away with sneaking out and not doing homework. She’d give me a warning and then give the same telling off the next time I did it.

Checking my phone, I noticed Mysie had tried calling fifteen times, the joys of putting my mobile on silent. Switching the volume back on but before I could even reach the zipper on my bag Pink’s Leave Me Alone (I’m Lonely) sounded. I forgot I put that as Mysie’s ring tone before I left, I couldn’t help but chuckle at the relevance now. Nonetheless, I answered it figuring one funeral this year was enough. Sympathy went to Mysie, looking after any teenager or young adult never mind me was enough but she also had anxiety issues, close to being on edge of a panic attack most of the time. I think her memory issues has something to do with the amount of times she disassociates.

“I’m still alive Mysie and no need to call the police on missing person just yet.” Real story, I’ve actually been a missing person five times since moving in with her, each time I’ve shown up with in ten hours of reporting.

“Where are you?” The shrill Newcastle voice came down on me.

“Scotland.”

“You’re visiting your grandmother.” She said not asked.

“No. I’m going to look for Nessie.” I replied sarcastically.

“Blair.” Mysie warned.

“I’ll keep you updated, but I have to do this.” I argued, I heard her huff on the other end, she knew especially with me being this far on the journey she couldn’t argue.

“I know you do. Just whatever happens remember I’m here for you.”

“I know you are.”

“Just keep in contact Blair and stay well.”

Falling back on the bed I found out the mattress isn’t going to be brilliant to sleep on. Talking with Mysie, I now felt guilty for leaving but I had to remember granny. She needed me now, even if she hadn’t seen me in about a decade.

After a day in Edinburgh, mostly shopping, I was in dire need of that bath and then bed. Despite the water didn’t get hotter than lukewarm and the bed was definition of uncomfortable, I felt beat. A brass band could march through and either they wouldn’t wake me up or I’d wake up screaming at them where they could shove each of their instruments and even how they could do it.

“Blair.” The female voice sang softly, it was familiar but still left me confused on if I was dreaming or this was real. I remember falling to sleep... I stood in a forest, surrounded by trees and darkness, I didn’t have chance to process my situation as a light suddenly appeared in the distance.

“Blair.” The musical voice came from the luminous presence.

“Hello?” I walked closer.

“Hello.” A curly red-haired woman smiled. She sat on the floor in a floaty green dress, with turquoise wings, patterned almost like a butterfly’s sticking out of her back. I tried to hide the horror. She was the woman who visited me in my dreams in childhood. However, back then I wouldn’t have recognised the similarities. Now I was older, it hit me. The woman looked like me. Only I didn’t have glitter strands running through my hair or obviously have wings.

“Who are you?” I shook, trying to remember what I called her as a child. I never asked her for her name. She was a fairy that’s all my childhood mind could process at the time. Stranger danger doesn’t apply to fairies or Santa.

“I was called Breena.”

“Was?” Oh god, don’t tell me I now see ghosts.

“It’s a long story. You’ll get to know some day.” Breena said still smirking.

“What do you mean?”

“Your grandmother is dying.” She stated, it wasn’t a question.

“How did you know?”

“Things are going to change for you, Blair.”

“You’re not answering any of my questions!” My temper was really getting the best of me, this Breena may look like me but obviously either knew too well or didn’t know at all how to really piss me off.

“I know everything you know. We are linked but only temporarily. There will come a time where I will disappear, and you will know everything I know.”

“But you’re not real.” I’m not sure if that’s me talking or the hundreds of therapists. Breena laughed before replying.

“As I said. Things are going to change.”

Wet. Something was licking my face. What? I doubted the old lady of the inn could handle a dog. And if she had cats I would know. I’d have been sneezing and in hives as soon as I walked through that door. I opened my eyes to find a dog hovering over me. Not just that but I was outside. In a forest.

“Not again.” I groaned, sitting up shoving my hair out of my face. Reason I hate places with forests. This happens. I’d go to sleep at night and wake up in the sunrise hours in some sort of woods.

“Toby what ye found!” A male voice shouted at the slobbering Labrador. “Aren’t ye cold lassie?” An old man appeared dressed in thick layers, I looked down realising I was only in pyjamas. Cursing in my head? Yes, I was.

“I’m fine. Best be getting back.” I tried to put on a Newcastle accent and laugh about it. Hopefully, he’ll come to the conclusion I’m some air-headed tourist on a hen-do or something what’s gone wrong.

“Are ye sure you’re ok?” He said as him and Toby followed me.

“I’m fine. It’s just a prank gone wrong.” Now thinking of it, the old lady at the inn might get some gossip out of this one. My muddy feet trudged back, I had gone deep into the forest, in the end Eric the owner of Toby walked me to the edge. Thankfully he promised not to say a word. I’m pretty sure though he’ll be back to tell his wife, Shona, everything and she’ll be on the next bus into town to tell all of her hair friends, turns out every Friday she has her hair done. Eric talked a lot on this walk. I think I would have preferred the company of the loopy Toby who ran into every mud puddle he could find, at least my head wouldn’t have been pounding as much and I’d have space to think.

Sneaking in through the front door was an epic fail. I could get away with it with Mysie and my parents but when the old lady was sat by the desk which was by the door, it’s sort of hard to get by. She looked up and down at my mud splattered nightwear and her mouth opened in shock. I didn’t justify it with any lie or excuse. Walking by, smiling at her like nothing had happened. She can make up her own story. Once I get cleaned up and changed, I’ll be leaving anyway.

Paying the lady of the inn I left, leaving a larger tip than I wanted, knowing she had to clean up the muddy footprints. I prayed and made a mental note that I was never returning to that village again. They’d have to kill me and drag my body back there, even then I’ll be dead but screaming I don’t wanna go because trust me I am not going to give up that easily.

Back in my car I was safe, I was awake, and I could finally get to thinking. It had been years since I had seen Breena. Before she used to tell me stories of her world, she was apparently a princess and her husband was a knight. As a child it was believable, but now? Fairy princesses don’t exist. If she was human, I’d have taken her words as a warning however, this figure had practically haunted my childhood is possibly the reason numerous times I have woken up in woodlands and the reason my sanity has been continuously questioned. I’m sorry but nope not believing in it. It was a dream and I am just sleepwalking again due to stress of my granny dying.

It is raining again as I hit the twenty-mile mark to Inverness. Something I’d need to get used to over the next few weeks. Though there was the slight problem that I didn’t exactly know where I’d be stopping over the next few weeks or however long I needed to stay. I mean I wanted to stay as long as granny lived but there was no way I could afford a hotel or paying for somewhere to stay. I hoped I could stay on the sofa in my grandmother’s house although it would be something that my family would criticise, financial help hadn’t really come from that side. I’d battled my way through life getting a part time job as soon as I hit sixteen. Mysie battled with enough demons to be taking care of me and listening to me wondering where my next outfit was coming from.

The roads were empty, sort of surprising. On the road as a child, my dad would constantly joke about how people queued up to see Loch Ness and the beauty of Inverness. I say joke… to be honest maybe he wasn’t joking. The place is beautiful. The constant scenery of Loch’s and greenery. If you get past the grey skies and fog, I was now facing. It wasn’t long before I hit the sign of my home village. Nerves started to heighten, the village was surrounded by forestry. One of the reasons I was glad to move away from here was because of that fact. It was harder to find me in a larger forest I spent a huge amount of my childhood being lost in it. I was back here for a reason. In the beginning I didn’t want to leave, the call back here seemed to become quieter as years went on.

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