#which taylor herself is obviously doing

[reputationvinyls]

some ppl on twitter have never had fun a day in their lives i saw a tweet where some ppl were connecting things between taylor and travis invisible string style and some of the replies / quotes were so pressed like ?? have u ever heard of being silly u should try it sometime

[milfygerard]

but fr outside of my contracted madness i absolutely refuse to give joe alwyn gold rush like how is that song at all related to their relationship the lyrics clearly spell out a relationship that either never existed or only existed in implication and fantasies and maybe-maybe nots and its so bitter and yet desperately soft in the bridge where it almost projects a sense of envy, of wanting to be them as much as you want them. It continues an interesting oft ignored lyrical trend of taylor wanting just as much to be her lover as to have them, envying their easy charisma (you were flush with the currency of cool/i was always turning out my pockets) or quiet dignity (your integrity makes me seem small) dating back to her earliest songs (the kind of flawless i wish i could be). Theres a projected self hatred and yearning to be better that twists itself into both romantic and sexual lust for her partners thats so fascinating and speaks to how all of her songs regardless of who theyre about are also an act of self reflection on who she is and who she wishes to be.

[amoreva]

girl i beg you i need reader x luke based on gorgeous by taylor swift... its been on my mind for like past week

FESS UP!

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pairing: luke castellan x reader

summary: you still have some unresolved feelings about a certain Hermes counselor.

warnings: cursing, implied reader is halfblood, sexual innuendo, dorky, drinking, kinda loser!reader

a/n: is it dorky? probably, lmk with feedback in the comments. every one is appreciated and helps me write towards your liking.

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You were a coward.

Not with everything, because gods forbid you’re afraid of monsters despite having demigod-blood in you.

No, you were a coward with confrontation. With emotions, with love. Mainly love. You couldn’t even confess to a someone without your stomach churning.

And how you expressed attraction was…not ideal, according to Silena. You kind of, sort of—just a tad made fun of some things you found attractive of them.

Ideally, you wanted to leave yourself out for the harpies to maul you when your crushes give you a look (you knew you fucked up).

Which is why you have stuck to the tactic of watch and admire from afar and be happy with just friendship.

A classic.

The bonfire burned high and orange as many of the older campers and counselors, including yourself, were hanging out without the responsibilities of taking care of your younger siblings.

The typical red solo cups were in the hands of every demigod. A mysterious mixture made by Dionysus’ twins, Pollux and Castor, occupied the container. They never told anyone the recipe or what’s in it, but it left a warm feeling in your chest.

“You keep staring and he’s bound to notice.” Silena sat next to you. “Or your eyes fall out.”

“I hate him. Why does he have to look like that?” You groaned and sipped your drink to distract you from your current crush.

Luke Castellan. The golden boy of Camp Half-Blood. He could charm anyone’s pants off with a smile. It was frustrating how good looking and friendly and cool and kind he was. Fuck him.

He was talking the Chris and Beckendorf about who knows what. Somehow, the Hermes counselor has yet to have a girlfriend. He’s probably a virgin. You could fix that.

“Honey…” Silena looked at you with concern in her eyes and a polite smile. “The whole sit and admire tactic is redundant. Talk to him.”

“Silena…” You whined and the girl was preparing herself to listen to your list of excuses of why you can’t.

“No, no—don’t whine like a baby!” Silena dumped the rest of her drink into your cup. Taking initiative, she made your chug like half. “Fess up or mess up! Take some liquid courage and go talk to him.”

“Silen—” You sputtered as your chest grew as warm as the bonfire. Your throat burned in a good way.

Whoever said Silena was the Camp’s Cupid was right and she was quite determined to get a start on pairing you and Luke. Just to see how it turns out, of course.

Next thing you know, you’re dragged over to Luke, Chris and Beckendorf; interrupting the boys’ conversation. Silena made up some lame excuse and said a quick introduction before shoving Chris and Beckendorf away from Luke and you.

Gods, he’s so gorgeous. His curly hair tosseles over his head. His eyes meeting yours as he sipped on his own drink. That amused smirk that paired so well with his scar—both working in favor of his boyish charm.

And suddenly he’s moving his mouth.

“Hey.” He said normal and polite as one would do. Obviously.

And you can’t help but think of Tangled. Specifically, the scene when Flynn Rider is tied up to a chair with Rapunzel’s hair. She interrogating him and all he could muster was a smolder and the word “Hey”, to try and charm his way out.

Luke looks out quizzically as you poorly try to stifle a mix between a giggle and a snort behind your hand. He must’ve thought you were crazy for laughing or extremely rude.

It’s frustrating how nervous you can be in front of your crushes.

“Hi—sorry…” You managed to quiet your laughs and awkwardly sip your drink. “I was thinking about how you remind me of Flynn Rider from Tangled. How are you?”

“Tangled?” Luke tilted his head in confusion. Oh gods, has this boy never experience Disney movies? This just made it even more terribly awkward if he didn’t get the reference.

“Y’know…the girl with the glowing hair locked in a tower until Flynn Rider gets her out to see the lanterns in exchange for the crown?” You explained.

“Oh! Rapunzel.” Luke nodded. “Yeah I remember that. I always loved the lantern scene.”

“Me too! I’ve always wanted to experience something like that.” You agreed and looked over at the bonfire. Silena and Beckendorf encouraging you to keep talking to him.

Though Luke and you fell silent. Your mind wracking topics to talk about with him, but all you can think of is how handsome he is. Now looks aren’t everything, but his personality was a gorgeous as Elysium.

“Gods, you are just so handsome.” You find yourself admitting without even thinking about it. You find the words to talk to him about anything and everything, but your stumble.

Luke grabbed your arm. Stars dotting your vision. The “liquid courage” Silena forced down your throat catching up to you. “Hey, I think that’s enough drinking. Yeah?”

“Yeah…” You mumble as Luke leads you away from the bonfire and towards your cabin.

“Let’s get you back to your bunk, yeah? S’not good to be so drunk now.” He cared enough to walk you back to your cabin! It left a warm feeling in your body, or that was the Dionysus twins’ special drink.

The cabin door creaks open and Luke procures some water. You drink it as Luke crouches to get your converse off. Again, your heart is warm inside, but that could just be the alcohol.

Luke laid your blanket over your body. An amused smirk on his face. He found you drunk cute. So, he decides to admit something hoping you’d remember tomorrow. You’re already half asleep when you hear this.

“I think you’re cute too. Let’s start out with watching Tangled first before we do anything, yeah?” Luke laughed quietly, trying not to wake your siblings. He wanted it to take it slow with you. Was this some drunk dream?

“Yeah…” You find yourself mumbling. Your eyes drooping shut before opening again. Struggling to stay awake to keep talking to Luke, you fall asleep.

Silena was a damn good Cupid.

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[finelinevogue]

the eras

summary - harry is the best boyfriend ever and not just because he has taylor swifts number

pairing - boyfriend!harry x reader

word count - ~1k

.’•*,.’>*,~<\*•,.-:’•.~_,*^;-.•*

“Hey babe.” You answered the phone whilst you wandered down the bakery aisle at Tescos.

Friday night was always grocery shopping night. The end of a week, beginning the weekend a fresh.

“Hey.” Harry answered.

“You okay? Need anything?”

“No, uh, you put cereal bars on the list right?”

“Yeah. I got ‘em. Where are you?”

“I’m just leaving Gem’s now. I’ll be home just before you I think.” He coughed out.

“Okay.” You said reaching for a loaf of whole grain bread, because Harry doesn’t care for white bread and you refuse to eat bread with seeds in.

“Need to ask y’something though.” He cleared his throat, which got you listening carefully.

“Right…”

You walked down the crockery aisle, because you cannot help yourself when it comes to an eclectic mug collection. You see a new, cool, mug? You buy it. There’s no other option.

As you pondered over whether any of the mugs took your fancy, Harry continued talking.

“So I spoke to someone today.”

“Uh… Congratulations?” You laughed out nervously, making a joke in a weird situation.

“You wanna know who?”

“Well, obviously.”

“Taylor.”

No second name was needed.

It was obvious who he meant.

You stopped reaching for a mug and instead stood still. You couldn’t move for a brief second, until you remembered you were in public and thought that being a statue might be a bit odd.

You placed the basket filled with groceries on the floor and pushed your hand back through your hair to ground you.

“Okay.”

“And she’s offered me - us - something.”

“Am I going to to get jealous? ‘Cause you know how much of a power couple you two made.” You giggled nervously.

“There’s too much to unpack there for a phone conversation, but no you won’t get jealous. Well, I mean, maybe you will I don’t really know what goes on in your head someti–”

“Harry!” You paused him.

“Taylor’s given us free Era’s tour tickets.”

You gasped a little bit.

Well, a lot. So much so that the people around you stopped to watch you, thinking something was wrong with the aisle or the mugs.

“Fuck off.” You cupped your hand over your mouth.

“Yeah, for London. Said we can come to all of them, or just one and whichever date.”

“No, babe, stop. You’re fucking lying.” Your eye’s watered.

Harry knew how much of a Swiftie you were. Like BIG time. You’d been a fan for a very long time. Through all the hate and all the drama, you had been there. Harry was even saved in your phone as ‘Taylor’s Ex’ as a period of time - as a healthy joke between the two of you.

You had a TikTok that was dedicated to being a fan, but it was mostly filled with you reacting to Taylor content or filming a series of videos where you rated Harry’s outfits - even though you’re with him when he’s getting dressed in a morning.

To not only get to go to the Eras tour, but to be invited by Taylor herself… Well. World ended.

“No, it’s real. Promise.” Harry laughed to himself, imagining you right now.

A few tears ran down your cheeks.

“Fuck. This is so embarrassing.” You laughed, wiping your nose and sniffling. “I’m literally crying on the mugs aisle.”

“Y/N, baby, we don’t need anymore mugs!” Harry laughed more.

“Shut up, yes we do. Wait. Is this real?”

“It is, my love. You’re going to the Eras tour.”

[normal-thoughts-official]

posts that will probably get me mauled by feral hounds but I do find it funny how Taylor Swift has managed to somehow convince most of her fans that she is the most oppressed person on Earth when she is actually one of the most privileged. She's literally a white one percenter whose dad is so rich he just bought a chunk of one of the biggest record labels ever once she was signed with it just for funsies. And of course with the CO2 emmissions thing right now it's more obvious than ever that TS holds enough power over literally the entire world than most people can even begin to comprehend. Yet somehow all her fans are convinced that all the petty ego fights she gets in on twitter are actually a Misogyny Issue and she is overly criticized and hated on because she is a woman (which is super unique of her and definitely not something that over 50% of the industry also is)

Like obviously misogyny is real and Taylor, like every other woman, is subjected to it. But there is such a thing as context and when it comes down to it the backlash Taylor faces as a woman is minuscule compared to the incredible amount of privilege and entitlement she has as a white burgeois first worlder cishet able bodied neurotypical thin conventionally attractive etc etc etc etc celebrity, which actually makes her less likely to face consequences for her actions and encounter backlash, not more. Especially outside of a music industry/celebrity-only context

But because she is part of one (1) oppressed group she has managed to milk that for all its worth and convince her fans that actually she has no power, no privilege, no ways to shield herself from well deserved criticism and absolutely anyone who speaks against her in any way or context is just being an agent of oppression against her, one of the most sheltered people in the world. Unironically fascinating

[lovingmattysposts]

hii could u do a smut femxmatt fic where they meet at a party and they’re both drunk and matt’s like flirty and touchy and they end up fucking!! tyyy!!!

Angel

"are you really an angel?"

"Not even close"

pairing: y/n and matt sturniolo

summary: Matt sees you from across the room at a halloween party and immediatly took interest, because you didn't look like everyone there. You looked special, natural, kind and it drove him crazy.

warning: smuutttttt, insecurities, cursing, drinking. A little cringe?

not proof read

I kind of took my own spin on this request so sorry if I didn't do it exactly how you imagined, but i though i could make it more investing than just a random party-sex thing😅

xoxo, Autumn

I hated going out with Taylor. Every time I stood next to her, I looked like a joke. Especically tonight. Standing in mirror I felt confident, looking at my angel outfit. I chose a bra top that had sequeince in it to make it more like a top.

It was out of my comfort zone at first but when I put it on I knew I made the right decision. I felt almost confident. Which is almost never the case, especailly on halloween in LA.

Taylor convinced me to go out, I normally refuse but it was halloween so i couldn't. I smiled to myself in the mirror as I smoothed out my skirt. Taylor busted through my door, catching my attention. I looked over and she had her phone in her hand before she looked up at me.

I wanted to crawl in a hole after seeing her outfit. A perfectly fitted red bodysuit that complemented her body and curves. Her hair was tied up and her lashes were long, with small devil ears on her head.

"Oh my god, you look so cute!" She jumped clapping down at me. I looked down and back in the mirror as she walked over to me and looked at us in the mirror. I glanced from me to her, swallowing the lump in my throat as she smiled.

It was like a little sister going out with her hot, popular, cool older sister. It wasn't even a competetion at this point.

"You look-" I shook my head looking at her. "I know! I got a size too small and it's acatully suffocating my legs" She complained showing off her legs in the mirror. I closed my eyes and turned not even wanting to compare myself next to her.

She filled out her costume like a damn supermodel and you looked like you were playing dress up. It was embarrassing. I rubbed my face and sighed.

"You almost ready?" She asked turning to me. I nodded. "Yeah, i'm ready" I smiled. She raised her eyebrows. "Can you at least but one some lipstick?" She asked scanning my face. I just blinked at her.

"Uh, yeah" I mumbled, walking over to my makeup table and picking up a gloss. I held it up, forcing a smile and smering it on my lips, swallowing. She sighed rolling her eyes before walking towards the door.

"The uber's here come on" She said walking out. I sighed walking over and slipping my shoes on, before walking out and meeting her in the living room.

I needed to get out of my head. I was just as pretty as her. I can do this. We're the devil and angel, obviously the devil is going to be a tad sexier than an angel. Or at least the way she did it.

She grabbed her purse before looking down at my shoes and crossing her arms meeting my eyes. I looked down at my tennis shoes before looking back up at her.

"What?" I asked. "Where are the heels I laied out for you?" She asked shaking her head. I scanned down her body seeing heels that made her legs look long and slender. I bit my lip, turning towards the door.

"I don't want my feet to hurt" I explained. What i meant is I hated wearing heels. They hurt my fucking feet and I can't pull them off nearly as good as you and it makes me look stupid.

She shook her head, turning around. "I tried" She mumbled to herself as I followed after her.

-

We've been at this party 30 minutes and every guy we've come in contact with has greeted Taylor with a "Oh my gosh, Taylor!" or an "Damn Taylor, looking good." and a "Oh who are you again?" when glancing at me.

I looked down at my shoes, seeing my shoes being ruined by the dirk and sulk about an inch thick layering the ground. I sighed putting the drink back up to my mouth, pleading with the alcohol to make me feel more at place here. It was slightly, working but not enough.

I looked over at Taylor who were talking to about three guys, giggling and pushing them playfully. I somehow merged out of the circle standing slightly by myself.

God I hated this.

I looked up, looking for an escape. I glanced around the room slowly before I caught a pair of eyes looking at me. I stopped and my face burned red when I realized he was looking at me and..smiling? I bit back a smile and looked at my feet.

God, he was cute.

I cursed myself. You can't even look at a guy? Come on y/n. Man the fuck up. I looked back up at him and he was still looking at me with a curious expression. He lifting his hand motioning for me to walk over to him.

My eyebrows furrowed and I turned around seeing if he was talking to anyone else. There was no one looking in his direction from where i was standing. I turned meeting his eyes again, he slightly chuckling and shaking his head.

Fuck, he was talking to me.

I swallowed and looked at Taylor for guidenece, but she was caught up in the blonde boy with the chain and what he was saying. "Taylor" I breathed. She shook her head laughing. I poked her slightly, making her looking over at me.

"What?" She asked shaking her head. I looked back over at the boy, who was taking a sip from his drink, but his gaze was still on me. I looked back over at her.

"Um, I'll be right back-I'm gonna go talk to this guy" I smiled at her. she shook her hand. "Okay, whatever just go. I'll find you later" She said obviously annoyed that I interupted her conversation. I swallowed stepping back and then walking over to where the boy was standing.

"

matt pov

I blinked at Chris as he tried to explain to me for the third time that drinking on halloween and getting blacked out didn't count because we were wearing costumes, so we technically weren't ourselves.

"Right" I breathed shaking my head at my brother bringing the drink back up to my lips. I kind of hated parties. Everyone here was the same. Wearing the same slutty, boring, unoriginal costumes. It was started to hurt my eyes.

"Did you text Nick?" Chris asked looking at me. I nodded. "He said he was coming to get us around 2" I explained. Nick didn't want to go to the party, he hated them more than me. So he agreed to pick us up from the party instead since Chris was dying to go out.

Don't get me wrong I loved to go out, but it's not like i'm going to find my wife plastered drunk at a party while she's wearing underwear as a costume. Chris agreed, but he didn't care he would usually find someone to hook up for the night and move on feeding his short-lived wants and never looking for anything long term.

Sometimes I question if we were actually related, then I remember we have the same face.

"Do you think people will know we are vampires?" Chris smiled up at me. I smiled shaking my head. "For safe measures maybe you should keep in the plastic fake teeth, that's making you drool all over yourself" I chuckled. He furrowed his eyebrows and pulled the teeth out of his mouth, that was making it hard for anyone to understand what the hell he was saying.

He glared up at me. I shook my head, before scanning the room slightly. Unimpressed from what I saw, before my eyes landed on her. I furrowed my eyebrows. She looked uncomforable. She was standing, her arms crossed over her body as she looked down at her shoes. Tennis shoes. I looked her up and down.

She was wearing white tights, a white mini skirt, and a sparkly top and tennis shoes. I chuckled to myself. She was standing slightly outside of a circle of guys and a blonde girl, who seemed to be chatting up the men around her, while the other girl stood there looking around. Like she was out of place.

I lifted my drink up to my mouth as her eyes landed on me. I smiled slightly. Her eyes went wide and her eyes retreated to her shoes. I smiled. Who was this girl? She glanced back up at me a few seconds later.

I motioned for her to come over here, clearly she was not excited about the position she was currently in. Her face scrunched as she turned around, glancing around her. She didn't think I was talking to her, making me shake my head and chuckle are cluelessness.

I saw her turn and tap her friend, who ignored her. I just watched her as she attempted to get her attention. She looked less than intrested in what she was saying. She looked back at me before saying something to the blonde and then biting her lip before starting to walk my way.

Y/n pov

Relax y/n. It's just a guy. A really fucking cute one. I took a deep breath before walking up to him, forcing a smile on my face. Anything to get out of that situation.

"Hey" He smiled down at him, a drink in his hand. I smiled. "Hi" I breathed. He smiled down at me. "I'm Matt" he said holding out his hand. I looked down, before shaking his hand. "Y/n" I said smiling.

"I'm Chris" The other boy said sticking out his hand. I smiled and shook it, looking over at him and then pausing. I looked back and forth between them. Why did they look the exact same just with different hair cuts?

"Are you guys twins?" I asked. They looked at each other and then shook their heads smiling. "Triplets" Matt said looking down at me. I furrowed my eyebrows glancing around.

"Nick's not here" Chris shook his head. Matt looked down at me and I nodded. "Why did you look so miserable over there?" Matt asked motioning to where I was just standing. I felt my face go red.

"Was it that obvious?" I chuckled before turning back to him. He chuckled and looked down. He nodded. I sighed leaning back and finishing what was left in my cup.

"What are you suppose to be?" I asked motioning to his costume. Chris sighed. "I told you, you should have kept the teeth in!" He said throwing his head back. I giggled. Matt rolled his eyes and looked back at me.

"I'm a vampire" He explained. I looked him up and down and raised my eyebrows. "It was last minute okay?" He said shaking his head, his cheek slightly burning.

"And you are?" He asked. I rolled my eyes and motioned to myself. "An angel?" He questioned. I nodded smiling. He smiled before licking his lips.

"Can I get you a drink?" He offered looking down at my empty cup. I looked up at him. "Please" I breathed. He smiled picking up the drink and walking over to the drinks placed on the counter. I nodded to Chris before following Matt.

Matt started to mix some things in my cups and I just watched him. "Cranberry Juice and Tequila?" I asked looking at he poured 1800 in my cup. He glanced over at me smiling.

"Trust me okay?" He said as he placed the bottle back down. I shook my head and took the cup before taking a sip. I winced as it went down, but the flavor was good.

"Is it not good?" He asked looking at my reaction. I shook my head. "No, it's great. I just don't drink that often" I explained, already feeling the previous drink move in my system. He nodded.

"Would you believe me if i said I don't either" He said setting his drink down. Not to be judgmental, but i looked him up and down and raised my eyebrows, causing him to laugh.

"Probably not" I said honestly smiling at him. He nodded. "That's fair" He smiled looking down at me. I shook my head and looked down, and looked up seeing him just looking down at me as he leaned against the counter.

"What?" I whispered as he stared at me like I was the only person in the world. He licked his lips as his eyes scanned my face. "You're pretty" He whispered, making goosebumps appear on my arms.

"Oh my god" I chuckled shaking my head, looking away. "What?" He asked smiling. I looked back over at him pursing my lips and I shrugged. "I just don't get that a lot" I answered honestly.

I didn't. It's not like I thought I was an ugly girl, i'm not a fucking pick me. I just wasn't a outstandingly gorgeous girl compared to the girls simply walking by us, and defenetely not to the standard of Taylor.

He rolled his eyes at my response. "Now I'm the one who doesn't believe you" He said picking his drink back up. I bit my lip and looked down.

"Everyone kind of just likes my roommate, Taylor. And I'm kind of the girl who's just with her" I sighed honestly. He furrowed his eyebrows. "The blonde" He asked motioning towards Taylor. I nodded looking at him. He squinted and tilted his head looking at him.

"Eh" He breathed. I rolled my eyes and pushed him, causing him to laugh. "I'm serious" He smiled leaning back up. "She seems without" He shrugged. I smiled and looked at him.

"And I'm not a liar. I know a pretty girl when I see one" He said leaning up towards me. I blushed and looked down. I felt him place his hand on my hip, rubbing his thumb back and forth. He looked down.

"You have a tattoo" He said, mentioning the guitar on my hipbone that was shown since I was wearing a low waisted mini skirt. I looked down and nodded.

"Yeah" I said confirming his statement. He looked up at me. "Any meaning?" He asked close, very close to me. I closed my eyes smiling and nodding.

"It's the Gibson Mastro Vibrola, it's the first guitar I ever had" I explained. He smiled as I spoke. "You play?" He asked glancing down to my lips every other second. "Mhm huh" I hummed looking at his blue eyes.

I let out a shaky breath, has he moved his thumb slowly against my hips.

"It is embarrassing to admit this is the most i've been touched by a boy in the past six months?" I breathed, the alcohol speaking for me at this point. He smiled and then shook his head.

"Why haven't you let a boy touch you?" He whispered quietly, his eyes boring into mine. I swallowed letting out a shaky breath. "They haven't wanted to" I whispered back.

He slipped his finger ever so slightly under the waistband of my skirt, rubbing my skin back and forth on my side.

"I don't think that's true" He whispered back, his eyes not leaving mine. His gaze so strong It could have knocked me over.

"Are you drunk?" I whispered. He smiled. "It's possible" He stated, gripping my hip and pulling me against him slightly. I breathed in.

"Are you?" He asked. I looked down at my cup before lifting my cup and finishing my second drink and setting it down, and nodded making him chuckle.

He moved his finger lower as he looked at me. I bit down on my lip, trying to think while he looked at me so intensely.

"Y/n! Who's this?"

Matt and I moved away from each other at the announcement of my name. I turned and saw Taylor standing staring Matt down like he was a piece of meat and she was starving. I looked between them and sighed stepping back.

"Taylor" She smiled sticking out her hand. Matt glanced at me before shaking her hand loosley. "Matt" He breathed. I bit my lip and looked away, feeling every drop of confidence exit my body. Great.

"What are you suppose to be" He asked raising his eyebrow. I looked up at her as she spun around showing off her outfit and looked back at him. I swallowed the lump in my throat. He crunched his face and shrugged. She sighed and looked over at me before pulling me against her.

"See, were a devil and an angel" She said motioning between us. I looked down. I hated standing next to her. Absoutely hated. it. Matt blinked between us.

"Cause, you see i'm like all dangerous and stuff and she's like-" Taylor glanced at me. "Not" She breathed, tilting her head. I felt my face burn red. Wow this was humilating. I looked at Matt who just stared at Taylor, confused on why this whole interaction was going down.

I let out a breath looking at Taylor. "Yeah well, i'm glad you got that point across Tay" I said walking past her and hitting her shoulder on the way as I felt tears brim at my eyes as I walked through people and towards the bathroom.

I reached up wiping my eyes as I pulled the door open and let out a breath.

One guy. I just wanted one guy. I groaned putting my hands against my face, leaning over the counter. Don't get upset y/n. That was even more embarrassing. I sat up looking at myself in the mirror.

Get yourself together geez. I took a deep breath before starting to pace back and forth in the bathroom.

You are going to walk back out there and pretend you are not upset. Stop acting like a baby. I groaned leaning my head back. I heard a knock on the door.

"Hold on a sec!" I yelled over the sound of the party outside, lifting my head back up. The knock came again stronger. I groaned before opening the door, but paused in my tracks when I saw Matt standing on the other side of the door.

I froze in my tracks, my eyes wide.

"Your roommate is a fucking bitch" He breathed before stepping forward and grabbing my face and smashing his lips against mine and pushing me back.

It took me a second before I figured out what was happening and I closed my eyes and melted into the kiss, kissing him back just as hungirly. I heard him kick the door closed behind him as his hands came around my waist, pulling me against him making me whine.

He smiled against my lips and he picked me up, as if I were weightless and set me onto the counter and moving himself in between my legs.

I felt him bite my lip causing me to gasp as he slipped his tounge into my mouth. He pressed into me pushing his hardening length into my almost bare self. I moaned against his lips as I wrapped my legs around his torso pulling him harder against me.

He leaned down before kissing me neck, biting and sucking making me throw my head back and let out uneasy breaths come out of my mouth at a fast pace.

"Matt, fuck" I moaned. He lifted his head and looked at me, his eyes dark and glossed over and his lips swollen. I blinked at him in awe.

"tell me, are you really an angel?" He asked breathless looking at me, breathing heavily. I licked my lips as I looked at him. "Not even close" I shook my head before grabbing his hand and pushing it between us, showing him the lack of underwear under my skirt.

His eyes glistened over as he smirked feeling over me himself. I sighed, leaning my head against his shoulder as he dipped a finger into me slowly fucking me with his finger.

I grabbed his arm and shuttered. "You weren't lying you haven't been touched in a while" He breathed next to my ear. I looked up at him through my eyelashes. "Matt" I breathed. He looked at me, moving his fingers in and out of me.

"Please fuck me" I sighed. He smiled before pulling his fingers out of me and leaned forward and kissing him roughly again.

I reached down between us, fumbling for his belt and pulling it out within a swift movement. He looked down as started to unbutton his pants and looked back up at me smiling leaning down and kissing my cheek and then my jawline.

"Fuck, you're so pretty" He whispered, making me giggle. He reached down after I unbuttoned his jeans before pulling his pants completely down and his underwear with it. I disconnected our lips and looked down between us, seeing his dick sprung free.

"Holy shit" I whispered. He lifted my head with his finger. "You can take it, angel" He said before connecting our lips again slipping his tonuge back into my mouth. I moaned at the sensation. I felt him reached down beneath us before lining himself up to my enterence.

He pushed slowly inside of me, letting me adjust to his size. I let out a moan disconnecting our lips as he sank into me. "Fuck" I mumbled, biting my lip. "Stop, biting your lip. It's driving me crazy" He groaned as he pushed all the way inside me and started to pull out again.

Slowly he started to move in and out of me. Fuck, I hadn't had sex in a while. This felt so fucking good. "Matt" I sighed. "Hm?" He asked pressing his forehead against mine. "Move faster" I said softly looking at him, making him smile as he picked up the pace.

He moaned closing his eyes as I reached up pulling on the strands of his short brown hair. I reached over grabbing his arm that was around my waist and pushed it under my leg, making him hit from a different angle, making me cry out.

Matt looked down at me as he held my leg. "Holy shit, you're gonna make me fall in love" He said as he sqweezed my leg. I smiled and chuckled as he moved faster.

"I can barely hold out angel, how far are you" He leaned down and pressed his lips against my ear. "T-Talk to me" I said making him edge it on. Not even a split second later he spoke again.

"Let go for me angel. I want you to come all over me. Mark me with you. I want everyone to know i'm yours" He whispered slowly kissing my neck. That was all I need before I broke all over him, laying my head on his shoulder.

He moaned edging on his own finish. "Matty, let go for your angel" I whispered in his ear. Immeditaly he hung his head and bit my shoulder as he came inside of me. I smiled as he collapsed against me.

He let go of my leg and placing his hands on either side of me before sliding out. I looked up at him and he smiled at me. Suddenly there was a pounding at the door.

We both turned our head and Matt reached below us before fumbling his clothes back on. I reached down, pulling down my skirt and hoping off the counter and clearing my throat and brushing through my hair with my fingers.

Matt stepped forward opening the door revealing his brother Chris and another one, blonde, who look like Matt. They both looked between us.

"We've been looking for you for like 20 minutes" Chris said looking at him and then me. I blushed looking down. "Sorry" Matt breathed, pushing his hair back.

"We're leaving let's go" The blonde said turning and walking away clearing angry. Chris looked between us before smiling and shaking his head, walking away too.

Matt turned back to me and grabbed my phone off the counter before typing in his number.

"Call me" he winked before running out the door, leaving me a blushing mess.

helloooo i loved this one hope u did too

[shaunamilfman]

never saw you coming

Summary: "You knew when you started dating Jackie that Shauna came along with the territory, but you hadn't quite realized how present she was going to be. Most people would get annoyed at the constant third wheeling, but you aren't most people. You weren't sure when your relationship with Jackie had crossed the line into a relationship with Jackie and Shauna, but you thought it might have something to do with first time you fucked Jackie in front of her."

A/N: jackieshauna x r endgame obviously. theres smut but definitely a lot more plot than you'd think.

The first time Jackie had brought Shauna along to your date you figured that you’d just gotten your wires crossed somewhere; Hell, she’d even had Shauna drive her to your house to pick you up. You’d paid for all three of your tickets, as strange as it was you did invite her out, which seemed to please Jackie. She’d held on tightly to your arm the whole time, quickly lacing your fingers together, but you were constantly aware of Shauna glaring a hole in the side of your head. 

As if dealing with Shauna's glares during the movie wasn't enough you had to put up with Shauna's snickering as you climbed in the back of her stupid two-door car. Jackie slapped lightly at Shauna's arm as she told her off for laughing, but Shauna didn't seem all that deterred. Shauna held her hands out placatingly as she gave Jackie an innocent look, but she couldn't stop the way her lips twitched as she tried to keep from smiling. 

Despite the way you flushed at Shauna's laughter you couldn't help but enjoy their bickering as Shauna drove. Shauna caught your eye in the rearview mirror to share a fond look as Jackie gave one of the worst takes on a movie you've ever heard, completely missing the point of it all. 

Shauna has a nice voice, You thought. She was much prettier when she didn't look like she was contemplating your imminent death. 

You'd taken the chance to switch to the front seat as Jackie insisted on being dropped off first. It would leave you in the uncomfortable predicament of sitting next to Shauna, but she'd at least stopped glaring at you since the movie ended. Jackie had given you a fond smile when you stumbled out of the car after her, placing a hand on your arm to steady you. 

It seemed unlikely, you thought you had been very clear when asking her out, but maybe she just hadn’t realized that it was a date. You figured you’d just talk to her about it the next time you saw her. You were quickly disavowed of that notion when she pulled you down by the collar of your shirt to kiss you goodbye. She pulled away and sauntered up to her front door leaving you star-struck in Shauna’s car. You sat in complete silence the entire way home, staring out the window as Shauna watched you contemplatively. Shauna had even seemed surprisingly sincere when she'd told you to have a good night as she dropped you off at home. 

The second time Jackie brought Shauna you figured she just didn’t feel comfortable alone with you. After all, you didn’t know each other all that well. The third, fourth, and fifth times Jackie brought Shauna along you finally just assumed she was a part of the package and started accommodating for a third person in your outings.

You knew it was strange that Jackie insisted on bringing her best friend along– she'd been quite insistent that best friends was the extent of their relationship when you had asked in one of your rare moments alone– but there were very few things you wouldn't put up with for the opportunity to date Jackie Taylor. 

The way her smile had lit up her entire face when you accommodated Shauna's food allergy when you'd made them dinner was payment enough. That had even garnered you a soft smile from Shauna herself, just a hint of the affection she usually reserved for Jackie shining in her eyes. 

That was another thing you had noticed, all those loving glances the two of them shared. You don’t think you’ve ever seen two people seem more in love, and yet they didn’t even seem to know about it. You wondered idly what Shauna even thought she was so angry at you for if not for dating Jackie. You also knew that Jackie honestly loved you separate from her feelings for Shauna. You were conflicted for a while as you mulled over the information, but ultimately you decided that the only thing better than one hot girlfriend was two. You were practically dating both of them already even if you only got to fool around with Jackie. It was a win-win for everyone involved.

You knew you had to tread very lightly with this decision: it was better to make Jackie think it was her idea. You’d just have to lead the horse to water.

…

Shauna glares over at you as you sip the last of your drink through your straw, purposely sucking noisily at the air knowing how much it annoys her. Your lips quirk up in a smile even as Jackie lightly taps you on the arm. “I’m gonna get another drink,” You tell Jackie, lightly pushing against her leg. She shakes her head, giving you a flirty smile as she shifts further into your lap to cement her seat. God, she was so good at being annoying when she wanted to. You glance up at the movie she’s made the three of you watch, making sure nothing important is happening as you sit your drink down on the end table. 

You slide your arms under Jackie, lifting her up as you move her over to Shauna’s lap instead. She scoffs with an offended look on her face, but Shauna just shrugs and moves her head to peer around Jackie’s shoulder. You can feel Jackie’s eyes on you as you pick your drink back up, following you all the way to the kitchen where you finally disappear from view. You pop open another can and quickly pour it, not wanting to miss anything. You’d shout from the rooftops about how much you hate Jackie’s dumb romcoms, and yet every time you found yourself glued to the TV.

You take your seat on the couch back, Jackie’s pout still firmly in place as she pretends not to look at you. You hold your arm out for her but she huffs and shakes her head. Shauna rolls her eyes and moves Jackie off her lap to sit between you. Jackie looks back at Shauna with a betrayed look. Shauna, for her part, just shrugs. 

“You can have her if you want,” You offer Shauna, playfully pressing against Jackie’s shoulder to lean her against Shauna. Shauna grins as she shakes her head, pushing her back against you. 

“No, really,” You insist, pushing Jackie back. Jackie’s gone limp as you pass her back and forth between you, eyes blown wide as you bargain with each other to take her as if she isn’t there. 

You put an end to the manhandling when Jackie starts to get whiney about it, pulling her back into your lap as if nothing ever happened as you turn back to the movie. Jackie’s arm wraps tightly around you, and the shaky feeling of her quick breaths against your neck tells you that Jackie might have enjoyed that in ways you weren’t expecting. You give her a questioning glance and she flushes before burying her face in your neck to hide. You rub your hand against her back absentmindedly as you give a curious-looking Shauna a shrug. Jackie’s weird sometimes, you suppose. 

… 

Despite your thoughts about opening up your relationship, you couldn’t help but quietly seethe in anger as Shauna cock-blocks you yet again. You wouldn’t mind that she was sleeping over in Jackie's bed, again, and spooning Jackie, again, if it wasn’t for how fucking smug she looks doing it. You weren’t sure why Shauna was suddenly deciding to fuck with you like this, you honestly wouldn’t have thought anything of it if she didn’t purposely try to provoke you about it. You so desperately want to know what she’s thinking in moments like these if she truly feels like she needs to compete with you for Jackie.

You’ve seen her act the same way with Jackie more and more as she tries to compete with her for your attention, but Jackie never seems to notice what Shauna’s doing. Shauna drapes herself over your lap before Jackie has the chance to and Jackie just gives her a wide smile as she sits next to you instead, leaning her head against your shoulder as she talks about her day. 

Shauna laces your fingers together and Jackie just grabs your other hand, completely unaware of the look of frustration on Shauna’s face. You’d almost find it funny that Shauna doesn’t realize that Jackie could never be jealous of her if only it wasn’t so sad. You’ve made an effort to include Shauna more in an attempt to put the idea in Jackie’s mind, but it only seems to heighten Shauna’s need for attention from both of you.

You know this is something you’re going to need to address soon or Shauna was going to do something desperate, but you didn’t really know how to have that kind of conversation. They both seem so oblivious to their feelings for each other that you’re not even sure they’d understand your concerns if you brought them up. It would just have to wait till the morning, You thought sleepily. Your eyes slip shut as the exhaustion of the day finally catches up to you.

You’re woken up by gentle shaking a few hours later, eyes blinking open blearily to see Jackie’s flushed face staring at you. She’s slipped away from Shauna at some point, shifting closer to you in her sleep. You smile sleepily at the thought, eyes slipping shut again. “Y/N.” Jackie whispers insistently. You groan quietly as you grieve the idea of getting a full eight hours of sleep, eyes opening again as you give her your full attention.

Now that you're wide awake you find yourself far more interested in what Jackie has to tell you, recognizing the look on her face. “Jackie,” You draw out, a faint look of amusement crossing your face.

“Shut up,” She mutters, but you’re overcome with fondness at the way she squirms in embarrassment. “Had a dream.”

“Mhm. I can see that,” You murmur teasingly. “What was your dream about then?”

“It was about you… and me… and we were… you know,” She trails off, flushing as she looks at you expectantly. 

“I'm afraid I don't know.”

Jackie sighs, giving you a look as if to say are you really going to make me say it? and you just grin in response. 

“You were touching me and someone was watching,” She says so quietly that you can barely make it out. 

“Someone?” You ask, already having an idea of just who this someone was.

“No one in particular, just someone,” Jackie murmurs quickly, not able to meet your eyes. You roll your eyes at the denial. Whatever. 

“Did they like watching you?” You ask, pushing gently against her shoulder to lay her on her back. You slip your fingers up her shirt, fingertips running lightly against her stomach. 

“Yeah,” She breathes out quietly, sighing at your touch. “Sha- she liked it. She kept talking to me, asking questions.” You hum in understanding, glancing over at Shauna to make sure she's still asleep. She's lying on her side facing you, which is a little nerve-wracking, but her eyes are closed and her breathing is even enough to reassure you as you slip your fingers beneath the waistband of Jackie's panties. 

Jackie inhales sharply as she glances over at Shauna, her thighs clenching shut reflexively around your hand. “Don't look at her. Look at me,” You murmur. Jackie slowly turns her head back, but you know she's resisting the urge to check back on Shauna again. There’s something about the look on her face that intrigues you, but you have things you’d much rather be doing.

You trail your fingertips through her wetness, rubbing a teasing circle around her clit only to choke back your laugh as her hips jump into your hand. The both of you hold still, looking carefully over at Shauna. Reassuring yourself that Shauna’s still asleep you slide your hand down to slip a finger inside of her. You're met by Jackie’s surprised squeak as she clenches around you.

“Quiet, Jackie,” You tease. “Don't want to wake Shauna up do you?” Jackie whines at the comment, hips jumping up. You laugh softly. “Like that idea, do you?” Jackie worries her lip between her teeth as she shakes her head, but she shifts closer to bury her head in your shoulder nonetheless. 

You weren't sure what you were going to say after that, probably another teasing comment that you knew she’d enjoy, but you're left speechless as you meet Shauna's eyes over Jackie's shoulder. Normally you'd apologize profusely for doing something like that in front of her, but you hesitate at the desperate look on Shauna's face as she watches how tightly Jackie's thighs squeeze around your hand. You knew Jackie well enough to know she wouldn't mind sharing this moment with Shauna– knew that she wouldn't mind sharing anything with Shauna–and Shauna herself was certainly not opposed to the idea, which left it up to you. Shauna has been such a brat all afternoon that the idea of wiping that smug grin off her face gives you a heady rush. 

You’d stilled long enough in shock that Jackie began to whine in protest as she clenched her hand in your shirt. You laugh softly in her ear, pressing an apologetic kiss against the side of her head as you resume the movement. You catch Shauna’s eyes, a smile slowly lifting the corners of your mouth as she finds herself unable to look away from you. You touch Jackie the same way you always do, just the way she likes, but you find yourself doing it more and more for Shauna’s benefit. You savor the way her eyes keep darting down Jackie’s body, a hungry look on her face as she watches the way your hand flexes against the fabric of Jackie’s panties. 

Shauna inevitably meets your eyes again, unable to keep herself away for too long at a time. 

You’d give anything in this moment to know what she’s thinking as she watches Jackie get fucked right in front of her. You certainly had an idea of what Shauna was feeling, her eyes blown wide with arousal as her thighs ever so subtly clenched together. She’s so careful not to let Jackie know she’s awake, so afraid that Jackie will take it from her.

You break eye contact to look down at Jackie as you slip a second finger in on an outstroke. Jackie releases a muffled moan in approval, biting down on your shirt as she tries and fails to keep herself quiet. You truly had no idea how Jackie was convincing herself that Shauna was still asleep as loud as she was, but you didn’t dwell on it for long. Normally you would take your time with her, enjoying the frustrated sounds she’d make as you worked her up far too slowly for her tastes, but you knew you could only keep Jackie from realizing Shauna was watching for so long. You grind the palm of your hand against her clit, enjoying the quiet noise of surprise as her body jerks.

You can practically feel the weight of Shauna’s gaze but you pay her no mind as you focus on your girlfriend, knowing from experience that she’s getting close as she starts actively rolling her hips. She’s practically balled your shirt up in her hands with how tightly she’s holding it, trying to pull you even closer as if any distance between the two of you was unbearable to her. “That’s it, Jackie. You’re being so good for me,” You murmur against her ear. She shivers at the heat of your breath, nodding her head against your shoulder.

“Tell me,” She pleads. You smile knowingly. 

“Come for me, Jackie?”

Jackie falls over the edge with a muffled whine, biting hard at your shirt as she tries to keep herself quiet. You slow your hand down as she finally catches her breath, hips stilling as she pulls her head away from your shoulder to look at you. Her legs shake around your hand, her whole body shuddering as you pull your hand back and let her waistband snap against her. Jackie exhales shakily, face red from where she buried it in your shoulder. 

Jackie relaxes against the bed long enough that you think that she’s probably fallen asleep till she starts sitting up. You watch her curiously as she climbs over you to get off the bed, losing interest as she murmurs the word bathroom on her way out. 

You’d almost forgotten about Shauna as you focused on Jackie, but her sudden shifting reminds you of her presence. You laugh softly as her thighs press tightly together, almost desperate for the friction. “Jackie will be back soon,” You remind her, not looking very sorry about it. Shauna gives you a weak glare, but she still seems a little too affected by everything that’s happened to put any real heat into it. 

You shift closer towards her, raising your fingers to her mouth in offering. Shauna immediately stills as her eyes focus on them; They’re still wet from Jackie, nearly glistening in the light from the street. Shauna hesitates for just a moment, glancing up at you to see what you’re thinking. 

You smile softly and that seems to be all it takes as Shauna immediately envelops them in her mouth. She moans at the taste, tongue immediately circling your fingers as she cleans Jackie completely off you. You gasp as she digs her tongue into the web of your fingers, taking them so deep into her mouth that you’re nearly overwhelmed by the warmth.

Your eyes narrow as the smug look comes back on her face. Shauna makes a shocked noise as your hand moves, palm resting against her chin as you press your fingers down against her tongue. She seems surprised, but certainly not averse to it. She opens her mouth wider as you start exploring it, fingertips rubbing against the top of her teeth as you pull out completely to cup her face with your hand. You’re not sure what was going to happen next, but as the sound of a door opening down the hallway sounds you know you need to stop.

Jackie quietly walks into the room, climbing back over you and collapsing a bit too roughly on the bed was Shauna is actually still asleep. Jackie reaches blindly for your hand to lace your fingers together, but jerks her hand away as she pulls your hand closer to her face to examine it.

“Ew,” Jackie whines disgustedly as she wipes your spit-covered fingers off on your shirt. “You got it on me.”

You scoff. “You don’t complain when-” You start, but Jackie clamps her hand over your mouth. She shakes her head, glancing nervously at Shauna.

Jackie giggles suddenly, turning back to face you with a wide grin on her face. “Did you know Shauna drools?” She asks. You look up, and sure enough, her face is still wet with her own saliva. You shake with silent laughter, burying your head in Jackie’s shoulder as you desperately try to keep in. Shauna was going to be so mad at you in the morning for this. 

You catch your breath after a while, pulling your head back to look at a slightly confused Jackie. 

You just shake your head, smile still splitting your face. “We good to sleep now, Jackie?” You ask softly. 

“Love you,” Jackie murmurs sleepily, the both of you tensing in surprise as the words leave her mouth. She opens her mouth, probably to walk it back before you interrupt.

“I love you too.”

“Yeah?” Jackie asks softly, eyes cracking open to look up at you. You’re nearly breathless at the look of affection she gives you, a gentle smile despite the look of exhaustion on her face. You're not quite sure what she’s tired for, considering she didn’t really do much of anything, but you nod before leaning down and kissing her. You pull away after a moment as you let Jackie adjust the both of you until she finds a comfortable position to sleep in, pulling your arm firmly over her body. You can hear Shauna’s shaky exhale, making Jackie tense in anxiety before slowly relaxing as Shauna stays quiet.

You close your eyes, holding Jackie tightly as the gentle movements of her breathing lull you back to sleep once again.

…

“Y/N,” Jackie says with a hint of frustration. You glance up suddenly as she pulls you out of your thoughts. She’s standing by the side of the couch and doesn’t seem too pleased with you.

“Yeah?” You ask guiltily, realizing that she's probably been trying to talk to you for a while. You’d been pretty distracted thinking about last night and she’s obviously been trying to get your attention.

“You weren’t listening,” She accuses, glancing over at Shauna to back her up. Shauna, for her part, is sitting on the far side of the couch fidgeting as she can’t seem to find a comfortable position to sit in. She looks up but can’t meet your eye, instead looking at Jackie. Shauna shrugs at Jackie’s question, fiddling with the cuff of her flannel. Shauna’s been thinking about last night too, leaving Jackie oblivious to the tension. As Shauna shifts in her seat again, you suddenly notice the way she’s been rubbing her thighs together.

“I’m sorry, Jackie,” You murmur, pressing a kiss against her fingertips. Jackie pouts down at you, but you can tell she was pleased by the kiss. She always loves it when you make her feel like a princess. You press a kiss against each of her knuckles, ignoring Shauna’s scoff as you make your way up her hand. Jackie’s grin splits her face by the time 

“I asked when you wanted to leave for our date. We’ve got to drop Shauna off, remember?” She asks. You look over at Shauna who almost seems relieved at the answer. You’re sure there are a lot of things she’d like to be doing with the memory of last night so fresh on her mind.

You hum in consideration, as if deep in thought before suggesting “How about we take Shauna with us?” Jackie’s face immediately lights up, bouncing on the balls of her feet in excitement as she looks over at a slightly dismayed Shauna. 

Shauna laughs nervously, knowing more than anyone how difficult it is to tell Jackie no. “I mean I’d love to bu-”

“Great!” Jackie says, clapping her hands together. “It’s a date then!” Shauna gives you a sour look as she slumps back against the couch.

“Why don’t you tell her what we’re doing today while I go get ready?” Jackie presses a quick kiss against your head as she passes by and climbs into Shauna’s lap like usual. Jackie was always very touchy, not that either of you ever complained, but it seems to be biting Shauna in the ass as of this moment. Shauna squirms beneath her, the weight of Jackie sitting on top of her far too much with her mind still on the last day's events. Shauna glares at you over Jackie’s head as Jackie goes on about all the shops you were heading to today. You wink at Shauna as you head out of the room.

…

You'd put a lot of the blame for the lack of communication on Jackie and Shauna, yet you've found yourself to be a huge part of the problem recently. You promised yourself you would finally talk to Jackie and Shauna about the state of your relationship, frankly it was getting ridiculous at this point, but the moment just never seems right. There was no shortage of moments when you should have spoken up, but something always seemed to get in the way. You'd think it was funny if it wasn't getting so irritating. 

The first time you considered saying something was when you caught Shauna writing in her journal. You wouldn't normally consider that anything of note, but she kept glancing over at the hand you'd used on Jackie and flushing slightly as she quickly glanced away. You watched in vague amusement as she filled pages and pages with whatever she was writing about. You opened your mouth to comment on it, but Jackie flopped down in the seat across from you ranting about her math teacher before you could. You nodded along to Jackie's rant, deciding to bring it up another time.

The next time you considered saying something was when you caught Jackie and Shauna whispering and giggling as they leaned against each other in the locker room, both of them in various states of undress. You watched as Jackie's hand trailed the side of Shauna's stomach in a decidedly non-platonic manner as Shauna stuttered over her sentence. They sprang apart guiltily the second they saw you, both of them hurriedly getting changed. That definitely would have been a good time to speak up, but as the rest of the team started filing into the locker room you let the moment pass by. 

You considered saying something as you caught the jealous look on Shauna's face as you kissed Jackie goodbye in her doorway, Shauna's eyes following the way your fingers traced the side of Jackie's face. Maybe you should have said something at Jackie's shuddering breath as she noticed Shauna had been watching. But then Jackie pressed a quick kiss against lips and walked inside with a rushed “I love you.”

Maybe you should have spoken up as Jackie sat in your lap watching someone flirt with Shauna with an unreadable look on her face, but you were too busy glaring at him to realize Jackie was focused on it too. Shauna seemed almost surprised when she caught the two of you looking at her. She didn't seem all that interested in what he was saying, you don't even think she was listening to him, but her lips quirked up with a hint of a smirk at the twin looks of jealousy on your and Jackie's faces. 

You were definitely ready to talk about it then, on the verge of moving Jackie off your lap and storming across the room. Jackie snaps out of it at the look on Shauna's face and gently cups your chin as she turns your face to kiss you in full view of Shauna. It was petty bullshit, you were more than aware, but there was a reason you got along so well with the two of them. 

You rested your hands against Jackie's hips as she shifted to straddling you, catching Shauna's eyes over her shoulder as Jackie attached her lips to your neck. Shauna watched intently as she held her drink up to her mouth to hide her expression, no longer even pretending to listen to that man talk. You should have spoken about it then, but then Jackie bit gently at your neck and you were much more preoccupied with other things. 

Needless to say, you were growing more and more annoyed by the situation, but you couldn't even be that mad anymore knowing that you were now part of the problem. You groan in frustration, burying your head in your hands. Shauna looks up in shock from her notebook, pen hovering above the page as she looks you over. She caps her pen as she shuts her journal, sliding both of them into her bag. She puts a hand on your arm as she asks, “Y/N?

You're startled by the interruption of your thoughts, slowly lowering your arms from your face. She laces your fingers together after a moment of hesitation, squeezing gently in a comforting motion. “What's wrong?” She asks gently. You're almost in awe as you look at her. You knew she was more than capable of being sweet, but you've never had this kind of attention from her. It was usually directed at Jackie.

You want to put everything on the table immediately, but you know her well enough to know that she wouldn't react well to this conversation on her own. “Nothing, Shauna. Just a bad test grade,” You lie. 

Her eyes narrow slightly but she seems to let it go. “It's not about…” She trails off awkwardly. 

You shake your head, quick to assure her. “No, no. It's not about that night,” You promise. Shauna flushes at the reminder but looks down at the table as she nods. She opens her mouth to say something else, but Jackie slides into the seat next to her. 

“What are we talking about?” Jackie asks in feigned excitement, not sparing your linked hands a second glance. You knew the look on her face well enough to know she had a headache coming on. Obviously so did Shauna, who pulled her hand away from you to rummage through her bag for some Tylenol. 

“Coach again?” You ask. Jackie groans, shaking her head. 

“Don't even say his name,” She mutters, dry swallowing the Tylenol and pressing a kiss against Shauna's cheek in thanks. Shauna glances over at you to see your reaction, but you don't seem to have noticed as you continue to talk to Jackie about her meeting with coach. 

Shauna sighs. 

…

You're getting ready for bed after Shauna had left, a rare night in which her mother insisted on her being home for once. When you catch Jackie staring at you and quickly looking away at her nails for the third time in the last five minutes you sigh loudly enough that she glances back up. 

You give her a knowing look that she seems surprised at as if she thought she was being really subtle with her glances. “Is there something you want to talk about Jackie?” You prompt, looking expectant as you climb onto the bed to sit next to her.

Jackie pouts as she asks, “How did you know?” You flop back on the bed with a groan, lifting your hands up to cover your face. “Was it that obvious?” She gently tugs your hand away from your face, lacing your fingers together. You make a dramatic showing of looking at her, and then looking away, and repeat it a few times until she lightly smacks you on the arm and giggles. 

“Maybe it was a little obvious,” She admits. You laugh. A little?

“Fine! It was very obvious. Kick a girl while she’s down,” Jackie complains, but her voice betrays her happiness. “It was just… Lately, Shauna’s been around a lot more,” She pauses as she considers what to say.

“Not that she hasn’t always been around,” She rushes to add, closely watching you as if trying to read your mind. “It’s been different lately, don’t you think?”

“Different?” You ask slowly, a hint of excitement entering your voice. Was she finally going to admit it? Thank god.

“What we did at the party,” Jackie says, “I didn’t know why I was so jealous. I mean I was there with my girlfriend so why would I care if Shauna had someone? Thought I could prove to myself that I just wanted attention but it didn’t work.” She looks frustrated at herself as she speaks, and you gently squeeze her hand to bring her back to the moment.

She squeezes back before letting go of your hand entirely, shifting so that she can lay on top of you instead. She buries her head in your shoulder, voice muffled and barely comprehensible as she asks, “I didn’t realize it then, but you were looking at her too weren’t you?” 

You start gently rubbing your fingertips against her scalp, making Jackie melt against you as you consider your response. “I was jealous too,” You say finally, “I didn’t like it when she was talking to someone else, even if it wasn’t fair of me.”

“Was she watching?” Jackie asks slowly. “When we were…”

“She was,” You say carefully. “She looked jealous too.”

“Do you… Do you think that maybe she would– I mean if you also want,” Jackie says quickly, stumbling over her words in a bit of a panic.

“Relax, Jackie,” You say softly. “I know she would, and so do I.”

“You can’t know for sure,” Jackie says. Your hand stills guiltily in her hair as you clear your throat nervously. Jackie quickly pulls away from you, rising up to her knees to straddle you as she looks down at you with a suspicious expression. “Do you know something I don’t?” She says, sickly sweet and on the verge of a threat.

“Do you remember when you had that dream and we–” You start but are quickly interrupted by Jackie.

“Yes,” She says slowly, a look of dawning realization on her face. 

“Shauna was awake,” You say quickly, just wanting to rip the bandage off.

Jackie pauses, suddenly looking a little embarrassed. “You knew about that?”

You gasp. “You knew about that?”

“She breathes differently when she’s asleep,” Jackie says dismissively as if that's a normal thing that normal people know. Right.

“If you knew she was watching, why didn’t you say anything?”

Jackie shrugs and she offers. “She’s Shauna, and we talked about it later. Why didn’t you say anything?”

You grin. “She’s Shauna.”

Jackie laughs softly, hand resting against the bed next to your head as she leans closer to your face. “She liked it?” She asks finally.

“She did,” You confirm quickly, nearly rolling your eyes at the pleased look that immediately crosses Jackie’s face. “I let her taste you,”

Jackie makes a squeaking noise, facing flushing a bright red as she sputters above you. “Is that– Is that why her face was wet?” She asks dumbfoundedly. She pauses, her embarrassment slowly turning into something else the longer she thinks about it. 

She stumbles over her words as she manages to get out, “She… her mouth… your fingers?”

“Is that what you want to focus on?” You ask patiently, resting your hands affectionately against Jackie’s hips.

“Yes. No. Later,” Jackie decides quickly, looking a little unsure as she continues. “I like Shauna, Shauna likes us, and you like Shauna?”

You laugh, giving her an amused grin. Leave it to Jackie Taylor to ask the obvious. “I like Shuana, yes.” 

“Don’t laugh at me,” She whines, leaning down to place a kiss against your lips. She giggles as you try to chase her as she pulls away, gently pressing you down with a hand against your shoulder.

“I’ll talk to Shauna.” Jackie nods decisively, squeezing gently at your shoulder. “She’d take it better coming from me don’t you think?” Jackie pauses. “Or maybe we don’t tell her just yet.”

You groan in frustration but Jackie quickly shushes you and continues, “Hear me out, hear me out. Shauna knew that both of us knew and didn’t tell either of us. Maybe we leave out some information for once?” You laugh softly, rolling your eyes.

She’s so petty. You nod. Jackie smiles affectionately as she leans down to kiss you again.

…

You reach a hand out as Shauna walks up to take a seat on the couch next to you and lightly grasp at her arm, tugging her towards you like you would if she was Jackie. She stumbles back into your lap as you wrap your arms around her waist and rest your head on her shoulder. 

“Y/N?” She asks softly, seeming confused.

“I missed you last night,” You say quietly against her ear. She shudders at the feeling, shifting uncomfortably in your lap.

“Jackie was there,” She refutes. She seems surprised at the position but doesn’t make any move to get up. She tentatively relaxes the longer you go without commenting, letting you hold her tighter as she leans further against you.

“You know,” You say. “You’re looking really hot today.” Shauna glances around as if looking for Jackie before she finally realizes you’re talking to her.

“I… I do?” She asks, an equal mixture of pleased and confused. 

“Not that you don’t always look hot, but this is really working for you,” You murmur, gently running a finger across the sliver of her stomach that her shirt exposes. Shauna gasps softly, almost arching into your hand before her embarrassment catches up to her. She stills immediately and you can feel her blush against the side of your face.

“Don’t be embarrassed, Shauna. Jackie and I are always talking about how good you look in this shirt,” You say, quickly stopping the grin that threatens to expose you as Shauna inhales sharply.

“You do? You and Jackie talk about me?” She asks, pretending like she isn’t interested in the answer. 

You shrug as if the answer doesn’t matter, changing the conversation to something else. You can practically feel Shauna’s irritation at this topic change, but she doesn’t acknowledge it as she reluctantly allows it. Shauna tenses at the sound of the door opening, scrambling to try to get off your lap but you just hold her tighter. 

She watches Jackie wearily, grunting in surprise when Jackie happily wraps her arms around the both of you as she effectively squeezes Shauna in between your bodies. Shauna's practically squirming in your lap at this, springing up the second Jackie pulls away. She stumbles to her feet with her hair messy, her face flushed, and her expression unreadable. 

Jackie sits down on the far side of the couch as she talks aimlessly about her day, leaving a disgruntled-looking Shauna to sit between you. You and Jackie share an amused look behind Shauna's head. Jackie gently tugs on Shauna’s shoulder, trying to get her to lay her head down on her lap. Shauna glances at you suspiciously before quickly shaking her head. You’ve seen Jackie and Shauna lay all over each other in far more intimate positions, so you know she suspects something is up. Shauna has always been a smart girl, quick on the draw, so you knew you wouldn’t be able to get one over on her for long.

“Shauna,” Jackie whines, pouting at her. “Please?” Shauna may be a smart girl, but even smart girls are not immune to the whims of Jackie Taylor. Shauna holds out for an admirable 30 seconds before she sighs, shifting to lay her head in Jackie’s lap. She shuffles awkwardly trying to find a comfortable position for the rest of her body before you pull her legs up and into your lap. Shauna lies stiffly across the both of you, arms resting against her chest as she takes the position in.

You can’t help but snicker at the uneasy way she watches you as if any moment you’ll tell her off for the way Jackie gently strokes her head. Shauna gives you a weak glare, more for the sake of it than any actual heat. With the way she has to look up to see you, you can’t help but notice one of her best features.

“You have such pretty eyes, Shauna,” You say. Jackie laughs softly, thumb resting under Shauna’s chin as she tips her head back to see them.

“Y/N is right. They’re very distracting,” Jackie says, nodding sagely. “You can really get lost in them.” Jackie’s hand rests against Shauna’s face as she gently strokes it with her thumb. Shauna shivers at the touch, eyes wide with a mixture of emotions you can’t quite place. You start to get a little nervous, exchanging an unsure glance with Jackie as you wonder if you’re taking it a bit too far. Shauna was… fragile. Quick to make assumptions, to fly off the handle. It was best to end it while it was still fun, and you can tell Jackie agrees.

“What the fuck are you guys doing?” Shauna snaps, trying to sit up. Jackie’s arm presses against her chest, forcing her to choose between sitting up and possibly hurting Jackie. Shauna grumbles as she lets Jackie lay her back down, looking extremely displeased about it.

“We’ve decided that you’re our girlfriend now,” You say amusedly, arm resting on top of Shauna’s legs to keep her down in case she tries to escape. “Congrats!”

Shauna sputters a protest, looking annoyed at the clear amusement on both of your faces. “You can’t just– You can’t just make that decision without me,”

“Oh? Do you not like it when people leave out important information and don’t communicate?” Jackie asks, smiling down at her.

“What?” Shauna asks. You note that despite her clear irritation with the situation, she still seems pretty pleased with the results. You can see just a hint of a grin peeking out even as she tries to stifle it.

“Jackie told me about that little conversation you had,” You say wryly, giving her a knowing look.

Shauna nods shamefacedly, “You uh, found out about that huh?” She fiddles with the cuff of her flannel as she awkwardly clears her throat. She squirms in both of your grasps but quickly realizes she can’t get away without a fight. She’s flushed with embarrassment and can’t seem to make eye contact with either of you as she stares up at a particularly interesting spot on the ceiling.

“Why didn’t you say anything?” You ask.

Shauna sighs uncomfortably, closing her eyes as she relaxes against the two of you. “I just… It was the first time I felt like I was… that we were… an us.” She admits. “What if I told you that both of you wanted me there? What if you decided that you didn’t want to risk that?” She looks suddenly unsure as if she still thinks you could change your mind. “Did you mean it? About wanting me to be your girlfriend?”

You and Jackie exchange a look, a little sad over Shauna’s admission. The immediate wave of guilt that rushes over you at the realization of Shauna’s loneliness is a little overwhelming. You, of course, had known about the extent of their feelings for a while but you hadn’t realized Shauna was feeling alienated from the two of you. Not anymore.

“Of course we meant it silly,” Jackie says. Jackie’s grip on Shauna’s face tightens, gently pulling her up to meet her for a kiss. Shauna gasps, hands flailing awkwardly before finally resting her weight on her elbows as she eagerly reciprocates Jackie’s kiss. You watch the two of them for a few moments, assuring yourself that you don’t feel any sort of jealousy at the action. You felt something at the sight, but it certainly wasn’t jealousy.

“Don’t hog her,” You complain, having waited far too long in your opinion to kiss Shauna Shipman. Jackie pulls away with a breathy laugh, letting go of Shauna’s face to push gently at her back. Shauna sits up with her eyes blown wide, watching you hungrily as you draw her into a kiss of your own. You're lost in the feeling of her lips against yours, soft and exploratory, as her arms come up to wrap around your shoulders. Jackie, not quick to be forgotten, presses herself against Shauna's back as she attaches her lips to her neck. Shauna gasps, quickly overwhelmed by the attention but greedily accepting it as the two of you share her between you. 

Maybe there were some benefits in talking about your feelings. Who knew?

…

The next time you go on a date Shauna plans it, you and Jackie giggling and nudging each other as you follow behind her. Shauna sighs as she glances back, she really can't take either of you anywhere. Maybe she hadn’t picked the best date idea ever, as Jackie quietly lamented later when Shauna’s in the bathroom, but she’d never done it before. You were sure her next date would be better. You hoped. Maybe she should leave the date planning to you and Jackie, actually. 

The next time you fake yawn and stretch your arm over Jackie's shoulder– a move you only used because you knew how much Jackie loved the classics– you find yourself with an arm around both your girls instead. Shauna scoffs but notably makes no actual protest, shifting closer to lay her head against your shoulder as they both cuddle closer. Jackie watches on fondly, lacing her and Shauna's fingers together across your lap. 

You're surprised to find that the general dynamic doesn't seem to change all that much now that you're officially dating Shauna. You were practically dating her before, but you really figured there would be more of an adjustment period. It feels like she was always here– maybe she always was, even if it wasn't acknowledged. No longer was she awkwardly trailing behind you and Jackie on your dates, but a much more active participant. She no longer had to pretend to gag when she caught the two of you kissing, instead, she’d happily make her way over to join.

The biggest point of contention in your relationship always seems to be who got to be in the middle. You quickly gave up on that fight, knowing better than to get in the middle of a spat between those two, no matter how light-hearted it was. Those traitors would turn on a dime to band together against you. You learned your lesson a long time ago on that one. You instead chose to watch fondly as they bicker about who gets to be the little spoon for so long that you've fallen asleep before the decision was made. You find out in the morning that Shauna won, but Jackie still managed to weasel her way between you after Shauna fell asleep. Leave it to Jackie to play the long game. 

Shauna herself seems to be the most hesitant with the new dynamic, eyeing the two of you wearily whenever she finds you together without her. It wasn’t exactly jealousy, though it looked similar at first glance. Rather, it was an insecurity she couldn’t quite shake that the two of you would realize that you didn’t need her in your relationship. Jackie was quick to nip that in the bud, knowing from experience how much Shauna could get in her own head. 

The two of you make a concerted effort to include Shauna in everything, to shower her with so much affection that she seems to get overwhelmed with it at times. As much as Shauna likes to pretend that she doesn’t need that level of attention, it’s undeniable the way she’s flourished under it. Shauna seems happier than you’ve ever seen her, and you can’t deny that you feel the same way.

As for Jackie, she is more than satisfied with the arrangement. She confesses to you quietly one night after Shauna falls asleep that she thinks she might have always had a crush on Shauna and just didn’t know it. The urge to laugh was strong, but you managed to power through it anyway as you reassured her that you weren’t angry with her for it. Even if she didn’t know, you certainly did.

… 

Jackie gasps, her grip on your arm bordering on painful as she arches her back and digs her head into your stomach. “She’s that good, Jackie?” You ask teasingly, feeling more than seeing the way she nodded desperately against you. You were far too focused on the sight that lay before you: Jackie’s legs thrown over an incredibly eager-looking Shauna’s shoulders. Between the arm you’ve got wrapped across her hips and Shauna’s grip on her thighs, Jackie’s got nowhere to go. Utterly overpowered in just the way she likes. You knew from experience how enthusiastic Shauna got in moments like this, knew how quickly her grip would turn bruising. You can't deny how appealing the thought is, already anticipating the way Jackie would moan and squirm when you pressed down against them.

Jackie’s hips twitch as her movement is stalled once again, quickly forcing you out of your thoughts as Jackie mumbles absentmindedly in agreement “Good, so good.” Shauna moans loud enough that you can hear her even over Jackie. You’re surprised Shauna can even hear her with how tightly she’s got her thighs wrapped around her ears, but you can tell that the comment spurs Shauna on as she pulls Jackie impossibly closer to her mouth.

You reach a hand down to run your fingers through Shauna’s hair, gently brushing a few stray strands out of her face. Shauna nudges her head into your hand at the action, momentarily forgetting about Jackie as you push her hair behind her ears. Jackie whines in protest, quickly taking advantage of Shauna’s lax grip on her thighs to buck her hips up as she pointedly digs her heels into Shauna’s back. It backfires on her in the best way as Shauna makes a shuddering noise at the hint of pain, arching up in search of more pressure.

You tighten your fingers in her hair, tugging Shauna gently back towards Jackie. Shauna whines at the sting, quickly focusing back on Jackie as she tightens her grip on her thighs once more to stop her hips from jumping up at the touch. Your free hand moves up to cup her breast, rolling her nipple between your fingers. “Brat,” You chide, grinning fondly as you admonish Jackie. Jackie’s breathy laugh quickly turns into a moan as Shauna’s mouth finally makes its way up to her clit, her body jerking at the way Shauna moans against her when she reflexively digs her heels in deeper.

“Kiss,” Jackie whines, head thrown back to give you her most pathetic look as she stares up at you. You’re not one to deny her anything, especially looking as desperate as she does right now, so you quickly lean down to meet her. She moans the second your lips touch, the effort being made almost exclusively on your part as Jackie’s far more focused on whatever Shauna’s doing.

You pull back as you give up on kissing her, smiling gently at the pout that crossed her face at the action. Jackie quickly gets distracted, her body writhing as her eyes slam shut. Her hand reaches up to pull your hand away from her breast, lacing your fingers together in a desperate need for a grounding touch. As much as she loves to have both of you focus on her she’s still quick to shy away, becoming overwhelmed at the sheer amount of attention she receives. You squeeze her hand gently, prompting Jackie to latch on as her grip quickly tightens. 

Jackie throws her head back with a silent cry, the calm before the storm as she comes with a loud needy cry. Her body shakes with the force of it, thighs trembling violently over Shauna’s shoulders as she works her down. You revel in the feeling of her muscles tensing and untensing as she tries and fails to move away from Shauna’s insistent movements, captive to the feeling as she thrashes and moans.

Jackie collapses back against you the second she’s finished, shuddering wordlessly as she tries to catch her breath. Jackie lets go of your hand to throw her arm over her eyes, breath still coming out in harsh pants. Your eyes trail down her body, lingering on the faint discoloration her heels have left on Shauna’s back. You can already imagine the way they’re going to look when they bruise, can already imagine the way Shauna’s going to come crawling into your lap the second she catches sight of them in the mirror till they heal.

Jackie groans quietly in protest as Shauna pulls her legs off her shoulders, letting them fall limply to the bed as Shauna shifts onto her knees between them. Shauna’s face shines with the evidence of Jackie’s orgasm, licking at her lips absentmindedly and giving you a smug look when she catches you staring. You reach your newly freed hand out to rest on the back of her neck as you pull her up for a deep kiss, groaning quietly into her mouth as you share the taste of Jackie between you. You can feel the slickness of Shauna’s face as it transfers to yours, lips moving insistently against each other in search of every last drop.

You pull away with Shauna’s bottom lip still trapped between your teeth, Shauna whining in pain as she tries to chase your mouth only to be stopped by Jackie’s firm hand on her shoulder. 

Shauna’s lip finally slips from your teeth as Jackie, who’s looking awfully miffed at being pressed between the two of you the whole time, keeps her from following you. Shauna’s hand slowly reaches for her mouth, body shuddering at her fingertip comes back with just the slightest amount of blood. Shauna relishes the sting, eyes dropping back to your mouth as if unable to look away.

Jackie groans as she wiggles her way out from between you, nearly kicking Shauna in the stomach as she flops uselessly on her stomach next to you. You and Shauna turn to look at her in concern, but Jackie lazily waves you off as she props her head bonelessly on her arm to watch the two of you. “Weren’t looking for another?” Shauna asks wryly, pointedly massaging her jaw. Jackie gives her a tired smirk as she shakes her head.

“Mm, no. Three was enough, thanks.”

Shauna scoffs, rolling her eyes fondly as she gently shoves at her shoulder. Jackie’s body rocks with the motion, but it does nothing to dislodge her or remove the smug look from her face. “Shauna doesn’t understand how hard it is to lay there and look pretty, huh?” You tease. Jackie nods enthusiastically, the two of you sharing an amused look as Shauna groans irritably. 

You scoot backward up the bed so that your back rests against the headboard, patting invitingly at your lap as you grin at Shauna. Shauna makes a big show of being irritated, but still quickly shuffles up on her knees to straddle you. You run your hands over her bare thighs, settling them to rest on her hips as you draw her into another kiss, tongue immediately seeking out the small cut on her lip. Shauna gasps as you tease her with the faint sting, her hands wrapping around your shoulders so you can’t pull back as she surges forward in a harsh kiss.

She's pressed your bodies closer together than you’d previously thought possible, every inch of your torsos touching as her thighs bracketed your hips. Shauna makes a loud noise of protest as you pull away to catch your breath, quickly closing the distance as if it pained her to be separated for even a moment. 

Her hands slide up to tangle in your hair, clenching her fingers in a gentle tug– she never could fully resist the urge to cause a little pain. She quickly slips her way into your mouth as she takes your sharp gasp at the tug for what it was: an opportunity. Your grip on Shauna’s hips tightens as she experimentally rocks her hips down, quickly matching her rhythm as you pull her forward. 

Shauna pulls away with a breathy gasp– apparently the distance is acceptable when she's the one creating it, go figure– and rests her head against your shoulder as she revels in the pleasure she’s given herself. She mouths absentmindedly at your neck, far too invested in maintaining her rhythm to put any actual effort into it.

With the lack of other distractions, you quickly focus on the insistent rolling of Shauna’s hips as she grinds down against you. Shauna bites petulantly at your neck at your breathy laugh, moaning against you as your fingertips dig into her hips in response. You squeeze her hip firmly once more, hand sliding between her legs as Shauna apologetically soothes the mark with her tongue.

You slip inside of her with two fingers, knowing how much Shauna enjoys the stretch as she cries out against your neck. She rocks jerkily against you as she adjusts to the feeling, strong thighs tensing as she starts riding your fingers in earnest. The headboard slams against the wall with the force of Shauna’s movements, insistently chasing her high with her usual violent intensity. 

The harsh breaths and muffled moans she's releasing against your neck lull you into a state of awe as you watch Shauna move. Shauna nips pointedly at your neck, not much appreciative of your distractedness. You start grinding your palm up against her, curling your fingers insistently. Shauna gasps as she grinds down hard, momentarily losing her rhythm as your palm touches her just right.

You glance absentmindedly at Jackie who’s watching the two of you closely. She waves her fingers lazily in greeting, looking exhausted and on the verge of falling asleep. She gives you a small smile as she mimics eating popcorn, her eyes focused on the way Shauna’s breasts bounce as she rides you.

Shauna’s thighs start to shake as she gets close, forcing you to take control as Shauna’s movements get more and more out of rhythm. You brace your arm as you start thrusting up into her in earnest, Shauna’s eyes slipping shut as her head slumps against you.

Shauna comes with a loud moan of your name, thighs trembling in a mixture of pleasure and exertion as she rides out her orgasm. Jackie rubs her hand comfortingly against Shauna’s thigh, happy to remind everyone of her presence once the work is finished as always. Shauna blindly reaches for Jackie’s hand as she laces their fingers together, still shaking against you as she catches her breath. “That was good,” Shauna murmurs, pressing a gentle kiss against your neck as you start running your fingers through her hair

You were right. Shauna does have a nice voice.

[evermoredeluxe]

there’s this guy on tiktok who has done studying in marketing and discusses downfalls of different celebs (or sometimes positive takes), and he did a “downfall of TS” series (which is ironic to make in the current economy even if you believe in it fully), and i do think he has some great insight in general and ofc he knows what he’s talking about, but it’s just wild to me that people analyze taylor’s relationship with us as one-sided. yeah i have a parasocial rs with her, but that woman has a parasocial rs with us too and people don’t realize that. idk how to explain to people, but she literally talked about eras tour and us being her everything last summer when… you know… yeah. and i feel like so many people think she’s being fake, but you can’t fake a connection. he talked about her being business-savvy and how that takes away from the authentic feel, but to me at least, it just makes me feel proud of her for getting her worth and being smart, like i actually want her to do well and be happy. he talked about fans feeling like they’re one message away from her, and ofc i feel close to her and like i know her because she shares herself so openly, but i highly doubt any fan genuinely believes that (even young fans) esp post 2020.

i feel like people analyze her by thinking that her authenticity is fake when that’s not true at all. she’s untouchable, but she manages to be grounded and honest to her fans and be generous through it all. i feel like lil things that connect us to her are unknown by the public, which i actually like and prefer btw. most recent example is red herring, and her, as always, letting us know before the world. and im not even go into everything she shares about herself as a human and her struggles via her music (which obviously are accessible to everyone, but are not being analyzed by everyone, and she knows we love analyzing). or how she is currently telling us stuff about her life via mashups that, again, she knows we will analyze and the general public won’t. this missing component of people’s understanding of her and her relationship with us truly hinders analysis of her as a person or even as Taylor Swift (the brand).

[boldlyvoid]

Love Story

Spencer Reid x Fem Reader

Summary: About a week into knowing her, Spencer knew he wanted to marry her one day. So, for her birthday, at The Eras Tour, he kneels to the ground and pulls out a ring...

Warnings: allusions to sex, stupid couple fights, Spencer spoiling her, roadtrips, food and drink mention, talks of the future (future kids) proposals.

a/n: this fic is for my best friend in the whole worlds birthday. @reidsbookclub, i love you, i hope you have the best time at your concert tonight <3

Word Count: 6k

Set in the Sweet Nothing Universe

He’s been in Reno for 3 months and dating Y/N for 3 months now, too. 

They practically live together now that it’s summer vacation for her. She took on some kids for tutoring, and she sees them a few hours a week whenever they have time. She mostly goes to their houses or meets them at the public library, which is right next door to his work. She brings him in a coffee or a snack whenever she’s in town, they have lunches together and she even stays a little longer in town so she can drive him home afterwards. 

It’s been wonderful. 

Everyone at work knows her, they call her Mrs. Reid as a joke and she thinks it's cute… Spencer, on the other hand, wishes she was his wife so, so bad. It’s way too early to ask her, even if he knows in his heart that she’s the one for him. So he’s waiting. He’s not sure how long he’ll wait. He doesn’t even know if she wants to get married one day. He still has some things to learn about her. 

Her birthday is coming up, soon, he knows that much. He actually learned about her birthday when Penelope was first telling him all about her. August 4th, making her a Leo, the lion sign, even though she’s as gentle as a flower. 

They haven’t planned anything for her birthday yet, it's still a couple of weeks away. He knows she’s told her kids that she’ll be busy from the 3rd to the 6th, taking 4 days just to herself, she wasn’t planning on doing anything. Spencer wants to treat her to something so bad. Be it a nice dinner, a gift she wants or a trip somewhere. So he takes those 4 days off too, he books it in advance with his boss, it’s approved and now he just has to plan something. 

During one of his lunch breaks that she isn’t sitting in on, he takes out his phone and calls up Penelope. Having known Y/N longer, she’s the perfect person to discuss ideas with. 

“Spencer my lovely! What are you doing calling me at 3pm on a weekday?” She answers full of cheer. 

“Y/N’s birthday is coming up, I need your expert advice on what to get her,” he heads right into it, skipping all the niceties, he only cares about her. 

“Taylor Swift tickets, duh!” 

“I tried that months ago, they sold out way too fast,” he complains. “We missed the Vegas show 'cause I obviously didn’t know her in March, all she has left are the Seattle and California shows… but again, they’re all sold out and the resale tickets are insane.” 

“Hey, six grand for 2 tickets with the love of your life is so worth it,” Penelope teases. “I might have a connection to the Inglewood show… maybe I can see if they have any last-minute tickets?” 

“How do you have a ticket connection?” 

“My brother's wife works for Ticketmaster, she said they save some tickets for important people until the last minute and if they’re not taken, they get released to the general public and you can get better deals if you call Ticketmaster instead of going online,” she explains. “I’ll give her a call, I’ll see what she can do.” 

“Okay, call me back when you know more?” 

“Will do, Spence-roo,” she says before hanging up, making him smile. 

—

He goes home to Y/N’s apartment that night, they have a home-cooked meal together and they settle down on the couch to watch something on TV and just relax for the rest of the night. 

She’s cuddled into Spencer’s side watching TikTok on her phone. She scrolled and scrolled and scrolled, barely watching anything for more than 30 seconds and then she stops on one. Spencer can hear the music and the cheering, it’s a tour video. He peeks over to it, watching as someone proposed to their girlfriend in the middle of Love Story. 

She likes it, opens the comments and congratulated them. The next words out of his mouth are barely in his control. They just tumble out. 

“Do you ever think about getting married?” 

She smiles up at him, “To you? Absolutely.” 

He pulls her in for a kiss. She locks her phone and tosses it to the side so she can climb into his lap and kiss him some more. His hands migrate to her hips, and she runs her fingers through his ever-growing hair. Making out with her on the couch, she lightly grinds against him, he hums into the kiss, breaking it to kiss her jaw along to her ear. 

“I’d want to marry you too…” 

She cups his face, staring him down, “Ask me whenever you’re ready.” 

“It’s not too soon?” 

She shakes her head, “No… I mean, people will probably think you knocked me up because of how fast we’ve moved but, it’s been 3 months. We know everything about each other, we sleep beside each other every single night, and I never want to break up with you. The next logical move would be to get married.” 

He steals another kiss, “I think,” he kisses her again on her jaw again, making his way down her neck, “You’re right.” 

She smiles, letting him go down to her boobs, “about people thinking you got me knocked up?” 

He laughs against her, “I mean, we fuck so often—

“No, don’t even joke,” she pulls his attention back to her. “You can’t get me pregnant just randomly, I don’t have enough money to pay for my substitute. You’d have to knock me up so I can have the baby in the summer…” 

He laughs, “You’re not serious, right?” 

“I’m completely serious. I don’t get maternity leave, I have to have summer babies if I want to keep my job.” 

“I have money,” he reminds her. “If we get married it becomes our money, you’d never have to worry about anything ever again.” 

She settles slightly, her shoulders drop again and she stares at him so softly, “I’d still worry, you know me.” 

He kisses her again, reaching up to brush her hair back, “I’m going to take care of you for the rest of your life… and if we ever had kids, you know I’d do the same for them.” 

“Do you want kids, like genuinely?” She asks. “Cause I know you love Henry and you said that you thought about having them with Maeve but—

“I want you to have my babies… whenever you’re ready,” he tosses the phrase back to her. 

That does it, she dives back in for another kiss, heating it up tenfold, he cradles her head and back, leaning down against the couch so he can hover over her. Working the button on her jeans open, he starts to tug on them when his phone rings. He wants to just let it ring, but it’s Penelope's ringtone. He hasn’t changed it, no matter how long he hasn’t worked with her, it’s still the same thing. 

“Hold on,” he whispers, trying to pull away. 

“Leave it,” she tugs him back in. She gets a few more kisses in and then he pulls back further. 

“I can’t, I’m sorry, I have to take this,” he reaches out to grab his phone off the coffee table and walks out of the apartment to take the call. 

“Hello?” 

“Hey, sorry, I know it’s late,” Penelope answers. “But I have good news. We were able to pull some strings and I got you 2 floor tickets for the 4th.” 

“No way?” He’s gobsmacked. 

“Way!! I gave her your information, the tickets are in your name and they’re being mailed to you so you’ll have physical tickets. You can just pay me back.” 

“What was the damage?” 

“they were $1800 each…” 

“That’s a lot better than the resale price,” he’s so glad. “Thank you, Penny, really, she’s going to love this.” 

“Hey, she was my friend first, I’d do anything for her,” Penny teases. “Now go back to hanging out with her, I’ll talk to you later, okay?” 

“thank you, we love you,” he reminds her. 

“I love you too!” And then she’s gone. 

He heads back inside and she’s no longer on the couch. The tv is off, all the lights are out, and she’s retreated back to the bedroom. He knocks before he enters, “Hey… sorry about that.” 

“It’s fine,” she says, clearly a bit upset. “I get it, works more important that me sometimes.” 

“No, no it’s not… and that wasn’t work.” 

“Is that supposed to make me feel better? Cause it doesn’t.” 

He timidly walks towards her, “Hey, hey, I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have walked out on you like that. I know. But it was important… it’s for your birthday, that’s all I can say.” 

She bites back a smile, looking him dead in the eyes. “Really?” 

He nods, “You still have from the 3rd to the 6th off, right?” 

She nods, “I do… why?” 

“I’ll tell you more when the day gets closer, just, don’t plan anything, I want to make this special. This is our first birthday together, I want to celebrate you.” 

“Okay, you’re forgiven,” she gives in, she rushes over to him and tosses her arms around his neck. “But next time it rings and you’re about to go down on me, it can wait.” 

“It definitely can,” he agrees, picking her up, he tosses her onto the bed. “Let me make it up to you.” 

—

She watches the era’s tour live streams on TikTok every weekend, she favourites outfits that she’d want to wear and she tells Spencer all about the surprise songs that she’d want to hear live one day. 

What she doesn’t know is that Spencer has memorized everything she’s said and he’s been using it to his advantage. He’s found her Pinterest board with eras tour dream outfits, and he’s made a playlist of her favourite songs so he’ll be able to sing along no matter what surprise songs happen. And he’s started to buy tour outfits for himself too. 

He puts a lot of work into her tour outfit, too. It’s midnights themed, he got her a denim jacket with the back panel cut out and replaced with a starry lace pattern. He bought iron on paper and printed out her favourite lyrics to iron onto the arms and put stars on a pair of dark blue Converse. He’s even been making friendship bracelets while on his lunch break at work. He just hasn’t been able to decide on what to get her to wear under the jacket and with the shoes. Nothing seems to be perfect enough. 

He’s walking home from work one night when he passes a window display full of sparkly dresses. He just doesn’t want to get her the wrong size. So he has the bright idea to take one of Y/N's dresses with him to the store to compare sizes. Trying to steal one of her dresses… that’s going to be difficult. 

“I have a question for you,” he asks that night at dinner. “But you can’t ask any follow-up questions or anything, okay?” 

“Alright..?” 

“Can I have one of your dresses to compare to a dress I want to buy you for your birthday?” 

She swoons, “Yeah… or you could take my measurements?” 

“Either way, I just want to make sure it fits.” 

And so that night she gives him one of her favourite dresses. She tells him the size she prefers in different fabrics and he makes a mental note of every single thing she says. 

-

The next day, he brings the dress to work with him, people want to ask questions but they don’t. He makes it through the day, walks out of work with the dress and right into the store he saw yesterday. 

The shop owner clocks him right away, noticing the dress, she thinks he’s making a return. 

“Hi, how can I help you?” 

“I’m surprising my girlfriend with Taylor Swift tickets for her birthday and I’m trying to plan her outfit, too, and the dress in the window is perfect! I brought in one of her other dresses, just to compare sizing so I get it right,” he explains. 

“Oh my god, aren’t you the dream boyfriend?” She teases. “Can I see that?” 

He places it on the counter for her, she takes a look at the tag and holds it up, “I think I have the window dress in this size… what era are you going for?” 

“I made her a jacket in the Midnights aesthetic and her shoes are evermore,” he shares. “The dress in the window is kinda mirrorball-esque, I like it.” 

“You know your shit,” she can’t believe it. “Do you have an outfit picked out?” 

He shakes his head. “No, I can’t decide if I want to do fearless or lover…”

“You could do both, get a puffy Romeo shirt and some pink pants, that would be cute?” 

“Yeah, yeah I like that idea… you know the Lover album cover, the heart she has around her eye? How would I do that?” He asks, he hasn’t had someone to talk to about any of this, so he’s taking a chance and asking everything. 

She’s really helpful, she’s able to get him the dress in the right size, show him where he can get adhesive sparkles for the face, helps him plan his own outfit and even get some accessories too. He spends a fair bit of money in her store and he thanks her. 

“I’m going to bring her back here after the tour, maybe she can get her engagement party dress here,” he suggests. 

“Wait, are you going to ask her to marry you at the show?” 

He nods, “During love story.” 

“She’s one lucky girl,” the shop owner swoons again. She’s overjoyed for them. “If you bring her back here for that I’ll give you a discount, that’s the sweetest thing in the world. I really hope she says yes.” 

“Me too.” 

—

He stole a piece of her costume jewelry when she wasn’t looking, a ring she typically wears on her right ring finger and brings it with him to all the jewelry shops he goes to. Finding a ring that feels like Y/N is hard. He wants it to be perfect, he wants it to be big and pretty and something she’ll show off to everyone. He wants it to be a ring that will stay in style for the next 50 years, he wants it to last. 

He’s looked at a million styles, every colour and cut imaginable… but nothing seems right. He knows the kind of rings she likes from her Pinterest, but even they don’t seem to fit what he imagines for them. This ring is supposed to symbolize their love and their relationship. It has to be perfect. 

He finds the ring on Etsy of all places. It was his last chance to get a ring. There were only 2 weeks until her birthday and he had to make sure the ring was in his possession before they took their trip to LA. 

The ring comes in two parts, one ring for the engagement and the other for the wedding. The wedding band perfectly encompasses the engagement ring, making the main ring look like it has little leaves coming out from around it. 

He gets them in white gold, the main stone is a man-made, oval-shaped diamond and the stones around it are man-made opal, 4 on each side to be exact, shaped like little diamonds. The wedding band also has man-made stones, in green. Together, they look perfect. He has them expedited, he pays the artist top dollar to make sure they’re at his house by August 1st and he prays they make it. 

—

She picks him up after work on July 31st and when they arrive at his house, there’s a package sitting on his front step. Part of him is furious that they just left it, they didn’t leave a drop-off notice and take it back to the UPS store for safekeeping, the rest of him is relieved that it made it. Y/N on the other hand, is nosey. She wants to know what he ordered. She’s curious as to why he didn’t want to open it in front of her, but she doesn’t bring it up again once he hides it in his room. 

They’re in the middle of cooking dinner when she wraps her arms around him, stands on her tip-toes and rests her head on his shoulder to watch him stir around the pan. “Can I ask a question about my birthday?” She pries slightly. 

“Depends on the question.” 

“Do I have to pack a bag or anything?” She asks the first question. 

“Yeah… I got us an Airbnb for the few days we’re taking off work,” he explains, not giving away too much.

“Okay, and what should I pack?” 

“Underwear, pyjamas, comfy clothes,” he lists off a few things. “Makeup and whatever you want to do with your hair… I’m going to tell you what’s happening the day of, you’ll have a few hours to plan for each event.” 

“Each event?” She picks that out. 

He just nods, “You’ll find out more later.” 

“Fine,” she sighs, resting her chest against his back now, she holds him tighter. “I’m going to go all out for your birthday too, you know.” 

“I know… we’re kind of obsessed with each other,” he teases. 

“I think it’s called love,” she reminds him. 

“You’re right… I do love you a lot,” he says as he spins around in her grip and hugs her close, kissing her neck gently. “I love you so much.” 

She hums happily, “I love you too, sneaky man. It’s killing me that I don’t know what’s happening but I trust you.” 

“Good,” he pulls back and cups her cheek. “How would you feel leaving late on the 2nd instead of early on the 3rd?” 

“We can do that, I know you prefer driving at night,” she knows him well. “We can pack after work and leave once we’re done.” 

“I will be packed the day before,” he teases. “I’m not a last-minute man.” 

“Oh, I know, you don’t do anything lightly, but I might need help packing,” she reminds him. “You can help me pick out accessories and shoes to match whatever you got me.” 

“You think I didn't get you shoes and accessories? Have you seen me?” He teases, that’s one thing she loves about him. He’s always matching.

She just laughs, “Of course you did.” 

—

Spencer walks from his apartment to hers with 2 suitcases, one for his own things and one just for their eras tour outfits. He has her second key fob, so he unlocks her car when he arrives and puts his things in the backseat and heads up to her apartment. He knocks once but ultimately lets himself in. “Babe?” 

“Bedroom!” She calls back, letting him know where she is. 

“Hey…” 

“So I’ve played out a bunch of outfits, what ones will be good for what you have planned?” 

“Anything is good, I have your outfit for the main event planned, the rests are dinners, brunches and us driving to and from California.” 

“We’re going to California?” She can’t believe it… but then she clues in. “Oh my god, Spencer, why are we going to California?”

He shrugs, “I don’t know, you tell me?” 

“I’m going to lose my mind if we’re doing what I think we’re doing,” she explains, rushing to his side, she places her hands on his shoulders, “I’m going to go nuts.” 

“I have no idea what you’re referring to…” 

She can’t believe him, she just hugs him and holds him there, “Oh, you’re so cute when you try to lie to me, I love you so much.” 

“I love you,” he hugs her back, kissing the top of her head. “Now, hurry up and pack, we can check into the Airbnb after 10pm tonight, if we leave now we could be there by midnight?” 

And so they pack her up, they check the apartment to make sure everything is off and all the widows are closed and they head out. She locks the door, he brings her suitcase down to the car and she lets him drive. He’s a lot more comfortable on the road at night, he takes them out of Reno, down Highway 695 towards Carson City. They see Bridgeport, Willow Springs, Mammoth and Crowley Lake, Big Pine, Independence, Long Pine and then they stop for gas and a snack. He drives from Long Pine to Ridgecrest and then they pass through Mojave around 11:30. 

They’re in the home stretch now. She knows exactly what’s happening when they go through Santa Clara.  She can see on their GPS that by taking the 405 south they’ll end up in Inglewood in just a few minutes. 

He got them a cute little Airbnb just a stone's throw from the stadium, they’d be able to walk to and from if they wanted to. Once he parks outside of it, she turns to him with tears in her eyes. “How did you manage to do this?” 

“Penelope,” he says with a smile. “She knows someone at Ticketmaster, they got me really good tickets for the 4th. I bought you an outfit, I made myself one, too… I know how badly you wanted to see her so I made it happen.” 

“You really are the man of my dreams,” she swoons. “Thank you.” 

“I’d do anything for you,” he reminds her. Meaning every word. 

“I know… now let’s get all our shit inside so I can give you a proper thank you.” 

—

They spend their first day there just looking around. They have brunch at a cute little spot she’s always wanted to try, they visit the National History Museum and Exposition Park. It’s a lovely day where they just get to hold hands and be together. They order dinner to their Airbnb and eat while watching TV and then they spend another night in bed together. It’s perfect. 

When they wake up on the 4th, Spencer smothers her in kisses and wishes her a happy birthday… they don’t leave the bed for a while after that. 

He orders her breakfast and while they’re waiting for it, he shows her the outfit he has picked out for her. The dress, her jacket, the shoes, a cute little clear purse for the stadium and a lot of sparkly makeup options for whatever she wants to do. 

“Spencer, this is perfect?” She’s amazed by it all. “How did you know?” 

“I found your Pinterest,” he shrugs. “and you always show me cute outfits on TikTok, I took a lot of inspiration from what I knew you’d like and your favourite songs to make this… and these,” he pulls out a ziplock bag full of bracelets. All handmade. All perfect.

She spreads all the bracelets out on their bed, and she reads each and every single one. He has sent titles, lyrics and abbreviations, even quotes from Taylor that he’s memorized from how many times she’s watched Miss Americana on her days off. “Spence, how am I going to part with these?” 

He shrugs, “Don’t trade your favourites? Maybe leave any special ones here?” 

“Yeah, I guess I could do that… I can’t believe you went through all the trouble of making these just for me, seriously, when did you have the time?” 

“On my lunch breaks,” he laughs to himself. “I had no idea what I was doing and then Keesha, our undercover girl, showed me how to make them better.” 

“Everything is perfect, Spence,” she stands and wraps her arms around him, holding him close. “This is going to be the best night of my life.” 

She really had no idea. 

“I was thinking we could maybe go get our nails done,” he says as she pulls away. “We don’t have to be at the stadium till 6, I think it would be nice to get some eras nails done? I might even get some colour?” 

“Yeah, that sounds amazing!” She agrees, not thinking anything of it. 

He really just wants her to think her nails are pretty when he slips the ring onto her finger later tonight. 

He already made the appointment with a local nail salon for 1pm, giving them enough time to head back to their Airbnb and get ready for the show and maybe even get something to eat before they go. He’s such a planner. She loved every second of it, it made her less stressed to know that he already knew everything that was going on and he was confident about it too. 

He gets his nails done as well. He’s always wanted to but never had the chance to. He gets just basic gel while she goes all out with a shorter acrylic shape, she gets sparkles and stars all in the 10 different album colours and she loves them. She keeps staring at them the whole walk home, she loves how they sparkle in the light and how pretty the shape makes her hand look. 

The ring is going to look even better on her hand now. 

They shower together back at their place, Spencer watches in awe as she does her hair and her makeup and it’s not until the end that he hands her the adhesive sparkles and asks her to help him put the lover heart around his eye. 

“What did you plan for your outfit?” She asks while carefully sticking each sparkle to his face. 

“I got some bright pink pants, like, highlighter pink, bright,” he smirks. “I also bought a puffy shirt like Romeo… I wanted to go for Lover Story.” 

She laughs, “Oh you’re going to look good.” 

“I also bought cowboy boots…” 

“You didn’t,” she can’t believe it. “What colour?” 

“Pink.” 

“Oh my god, Spence… really?” 

“well like you said Lover and Midnights go together like they were planned to be back to back and you’re my other half so I wanted us to match… and then I’m partly fearless which came after Evermore which is on your shoes, so, it all matches.” 

“I love you,” she cups his face gently, “like it’s insane how much I love you.” 

“It’s not insane. It’s the perfect amount,” he teases, pulling her in for a kiss. 

—

She doesn’t know they have front-row seats until they’re at the stadium getting their tickets checked. The best part of her reaction at the gate is that she thinks this is the last surprise… she’s so overjoyed with the thought of being that close to Taylor Swift that she can’t even fathom him proposing tonight. 

From all the Tiktok's that she’s watched since March, she knows that the best time to go to the merch stands isn’t before the concert. It’s during. So, on their way to their seats, they simply buy some overpriced drinks and trade a couple friendship bracelets before heading towards their seats. She looks around with her mouth agape, amazed at how big the place is and how much of the stage takes up the floor. 

At their seats, she shakes her head and lets out an exasperated laugh, “I can’t believe you got these?” 

“Only the best for my girl,” he teases, wrapping his arm around her, he brings her in and kisses the top of her head. “I love you, Happy birthday.” 

“I love you,” she smiles up at him. “Thank you for this, really. I’m going to thank you a million times.” 

“You don’t have to,” he waves it off. “I wanted to come too, you know, she’s a big reason we’re together in the first place.” 

“If only we could tell her thank you,” she laughs. 

“We should’ve made a sign,” he teases. 

“We should’ve…” she agrees. “Maybe I can just put big text on my phone and hold it up to her?” 

“That could work.” 

So that’s what she does, sitting in her seat, waiting for the opener, she drafts a few things to say while the stadium starts to fill up. 

It takes a while before someone behind them actually shows up. Spencer worried there for a moment that the seats behind him didn’t sell and thus part of his plan for tonight would be ruined… but then a couple girls, in their teens, show up just before HIAM comes out to play. 

Spencer takes something from his pocket, pretends to reach between their seats to the floor and turns back to one of the girls. “Um, I think you dropped this,” Spencer says to the girls behind them, he hands them a note and a $5 bill. Y/N watches him hand it back to them and then turns right back to watching the openers play. 

“Oh thanks,” the girl says with a smile. She opens the note and her eyes widen as she reads it. 

‘Can you please record me and my future fiancé during love story? I have an important question to ask her and I want to remember it forever.’ And his number at the bottom. 

She looks at Spencer with her eyes full of tears and nods, mouthing “I can do that.” 

He gives her a thumbs up and turns back to watching the show. HAIM are a band he’s heard Y/N play before, he’s surprised how many words he knows just from being around her. They’re amazing and he knows that because they’re on the tour now, that means their song with Taylor has been added to the setlist. He really likes that one, even if it is about premeditated murder. 

He knows the setlist like the back of his hand. It starts with Lover, the intro is a remix of all her eras names over top of the song Miss Americana and The Heartbreak Prince, the dancers wear these big sheets of fabric, peacocking around the stage and then they cover the middle of the main diamond stage. Once they lift the sheets back up, however, Taylor emerges onto the stage and the crowd goes wild. 

He’s seen the show on Tiktok live so many times that he’s okay with missing it in person, instead, he watches her. He watches the way she stares at Taylor like she hung the stars and the moon herself. Like she’s some sort of god and everyone here is blessed to be in her presence. She cries, shaking her head in disbelief, she chants the words back to her and doesn’t even realize Spencer has been staring at her the whole time. 

“Look how close she is,” Y/N bumps his shoulder and points. “She’s literally right there.” 

“I know,” he smiles, so in love with her he couldn’t even pay attention to Taylor. 

When Cruel Summer starts, she screams so loud, Spencer’s sure she’s going to lose her voice tomorrow. He finally starts paying attention to the show now. Singing along, he knows all the words. He actually really loves this song. And the man. He loves everything from Lover simply because he’s so deeply, deeply in love. 

Post-lover, Taylor heads in for a costume change and thats when Spencer starts to feel anxious. He’s 2 songs away from his big moment. He checks his pockets, he still has the ring, in its box staying safe, it’s right there and ready to go. He almost blacks out for most of Fearless, he snaps back into it for You Belong With Me and the first note to Love Story gets his heart beat racing a million miles a minute. 

He looks back at the girl behind him who has her phone out already she smiles at him, nodding like she’s ready to go and he takes a deep breath. Taylors walking down the catwalk, she’s going to be literally right in front of them when he gets down on one knee… he doesn’t think she’s seen a proposal this close and in person yet on this tour? Maybe she’ll notice them? 

He sings along, genuinely loving the song and it steadies him a little. Y/N is singing too, jumping up and down and pointing at Taylor during all the best parts. She’s having the time of her life… she has no idea what’s coming.

The second chorus comes and he reaches into his pocket, he’s holding the box in his hand and his heart is in his throat. 

“And I got tired of waiting… wondering if you were ever coming around, my faith in you was fading! When I met you on the outskirts of town!” Y/N sings along. “And I said Romeo save me I’ve been feeling so alone I keep waiting for you but you never come is this in my head I don’t know what to think, he kneels to the ground and pulled out a ring and—

She notices then that he’s dropped to one knee, following the song, he holds open the little black box and she screams. Everyone in their section is screaming. “Marry me, Juliet, you’ll never have to be alone I love you and that’s all I really know!” Spencer sings along to the song.

She’s frozen, can’t believe this is happening and real but she looks at the ring and then at him, her eyes full of tears. “Yes!!! Yes, I’ll marry you!!” She gets down to the ground with him and pulls him into a kiss, he smiles into it, happier than he’s ever been in his whole life. 

When she pulls back he takes the ring from the box and slides it onto her ring finger. He helps her back to her feet and all she can do is stare at it. “Holy shit?” 

“I love you!” He shouts, loud enough for everyone to hear. “I want to love you forever.” 

She pulls him into another hug, not even noticing that Taylor did see it. She pointed at them, she got excited and there was footage of it from a million different angles that she’ll get to see later. She finishes the song, running back to make her mark and then she disappears once again to get ready for Evermore. 

Y/N snuggles into his side, her left hand resting on his chest, she keeps pulling her hand back to look at it. There’s just enough quiet between eras that she asks, “Where did you get it? It’s beautiful.” 

“Etsy,” he says with a smile. “It was on my doorstep the other day when you came over.” 

“No way?” She laughs, “how long have you been planning this?” 

“Since I asked you how you felt about getting married one day,” he admits. 

She stands on her tiptoes and leans in for another kiss, “I Love you.” 

“I love you,” he reminds her. “Forever and always… but I actually mean that.” 

She laughs, “god, you really are the number 1 fearless stan, aren’t you?” 

He’s about to reply when the girls behind him poke him in the back, “Hey!” They both turn around. “I texted you the video and my friend got the other angle of Taylor's reaction!” 

“She saw it?!” Y/N freaks out. 

They nod, freaking out with her, “Yeah!! She pointed at you guys and she was so happy!!” 

“Holy shit!” Y/N shouts for the second time. “This is the best day of my fucking life, how does it keep getting better?” 

“I don’t know man, but congrats!” The girl says. “You guys are so cute together.” 

“Thank you,” they say at the same time. 

She looks at him this time like he hung the stars. If you told him just 4 months ago that he’d find the love of his life and get engaged to her at a Taylor Swift concert of all places, he would’ve laughed… now he can’t imagine his life going any other way. 

This is where he was always supposed to be. 

General Taglist 

@ncsls0515 @stevesmunsons @reidsbookclub @sweetyyhippyy @manuosorioh @mrs-dr-reid @k-k0129 @squishyturtle @katsukis1wife @babybisexual @marsmunson86 @buckleyhans 

[kimsmuse]

yandere childhood friend ♡ !!

gender neutral!reader. 1.7k words. warnings for irrational obsession for the reader. i'm not sure what it is but the guy is very, very delusional. i'm not sure what to think of this piece, but this one goes out for 🤏🍷anon, i loved the yandere drummer you drew so much so i hope you like this :) !!

“here,” you bring the flower to his face but he’s still annoyed. lately, he’s annoyed by almost everything, was teenage so bad? you wouldn’t know yet. your best friend is almost 2 years older than you and only holds the position because you've been practically be forced to get along with each other, courtesy of your family being great friends.

he scrunches up his face. “i'm allergic, you should know that.” he responds, not even looking up from his homework. “make me a paper bouquet, then we’ll see.”

the first time you realized that you liked your bestfriend was the first time that he realized that romance was not his cup of tea and with you? no way in hell. he hated the idea of cheesy romcoms and pop songs, it disgusted him and he made a point of making it obvious.

but you were young, just about 12 or something, and he was the only one close enough to fantasise about, so you did - doodled hearts around his initials and yours, “2gether 4ever ♡” and made it so obvious to the adults around you that they often teased you about it, much to your friend’s dismay.

and the crush was so strong that the moment you went home, you were on youtube, looking for ways to make a paper flower, and then piecing it all together.

“bed time, now,” your mother calls out and you proudly show off your paper bouquet to her, “is that for him?” she asks, amused at your efforts to be seen by your crush. you nod.

“aw, baby, as much as i love his mother as my bestfriend, that kid doesn’t deserve you,” she kisses your forehead.

yes, there were times when it felt like your heart was breaking into pieces or however those songs called it, when you saw him around school hanging out with other girls and not even acknowledging your presence. but when you went home and he excitedly told you about the new game he was playing, you fell all over again. besides, this is what happened in the music videos, right? there will be a day when he sees you like that too, when he’ll be long over this phase of shouting “ew, ew, ew,” when his parents kiss and be a more mature guy.

you did think that. but it was always in such a future tense that it never seemed realistic enough, it seemed far, far away. and when you actually reached that time period, your family had to move away, dad got a job somewhere else.

so you left that paper bouquet, (which quite frankly you didn’t have the courage to give it to him in fear that he might mock you that he told you to make it for him and you did? what a fool…) and a letter detailing your feelings for him.

but obviously it didn’t hold much depth, as you can imagine, a preteen detailing their infatuation.

but long after you were gone, your friend started to do something which he never thought he would do, ever. he was missing you.

he missed you when he came home from school and there was no one to talk to, or no one to taunt about how much he hated a particular thing and not have you judge him. it was just so awesome on how you had never judged him for anything, because he was sure if he kept on repeating on how much he hated taylor swift to some other girl in his grade, she'd probably have flipped him off, even if she, herself hated her. that was the level of repetitive he could get.

but he missed you, making those random cakes with your mother and you ran down to him to make him taste it first and he acted disgusted. “this is the worst, did you put in salt instead of sugar?” and you still had a smile on your face when you answered. “no, i just tasted it.”

he fiddled with the paper bouquet you left him for a long while after that, thinking about that afternoon and many others like that again and again. he could just… call you but his ego wouldn’t let him. and he was so disappointed over the fact that you were talking to his mother almost every other day, but you never asked for him?

it was hurtful.

but he couldn’t just ignore it. even when it was the only thing he wanted to do, ignore you, keep you out of his mind. but even when in high school he began going on dates and dances, he kept coming back to the paper flowers you left him.

he didn’t have any allergies. he was just messing with you. he never knew you'd actually do it. just like he never thought you'd actually leave, or that he'd ever miss you like this.

when he was out of the local college, he was sure that he was going to come to you, he knew the city where you lived through his parents' daily conversation at the dinner table. you were still in college, about an year or two remaining and he looked for jobs in your area.

when he found one, he was absolutely relieved. he told his parents it was one of the best opportunities in his career and it was, just not in his career, but it helped that the city you were in was quite famous and the job wasn’t bad either.

so when he finally takes your number from his mother and calls you.

he’s so delighted to hear your voice, even though it has changed a lot. and you’re happy too! you sound really happy when you say that you're excited to meet him.

and oh, you’re right, he never considered your angle on it, you must have missed him so much! oh, poor thing, the move must have been so harsh to you. maybe the reason you didn’t ask his mom to give him the call was because it'd simply hurt too much to talk to him without being near him. right? this had to be the only explanation.

so when he moves in and settles into his apwrtment, he calls you in the morning, and you give him a recommendation for a cafè nearby, “it’s a good one, i think you'll like it,”

see! you know him so well!

he arrives there a few minutes late, but you’re already there. oh, you still love him so well.

but midway through drinking overexpensive coffees and reminiscing the old times, he chokes on his drink.

he honestly thinks you’re kidding.

“what?” he wants you to repeat it again.

“i said, i’m not in love with you, my friend, i’ve moved on,”

the friend stings more than applying sanitizer on a cut, he swears. but it was just unbelievable, you were just running after him (not quite literally, pardon him, he’s a little delusional) begging for him (again, he’s delusional) to make him go on a date with you, with the last part being true. you did want him to go on a date with you, but you respected his decisions.

yes, you did have the worst and incredibly humiliating crush on your childhood friend, but it was just all that was in your opinion, a crush that started when you were 12 because he was the only one you hung out with and spent all your time with and so you were convinced, from ages 12 to 16 almost that this was the guy you’d marry and start a family with, you’d already picked out the names for them. but the problem was? he didn’t like you back.

your childhood friend had better things to do, like all teenage guys do, ofcourse, but he was always stuck with the feeling that he didn’t want you, he physically cringed when at joint dinner sometimes both of your parents would joke about you both dating, it was just something that was unimaginable for him at that point. only at that point though.

he was too busy going out on dates with random people, unbeknownst to how much he was hurting you (because in his defense, he was just a kid and he wasn’t quite sure how deep your feelings ran).

but now? why not now?

he had finally realized that it was you he liked, genuinely. And now you say this? It was absolutely heartless, did you not even stop to consider his feelings, even for once? Did the fact that you loved him before mean nothing to you?

“why don’t you love me anymore? or are you lying? to avenge your hopeless pining and me turning you away, is that it? please, talk to me. please.”

“it was a childhood crush, they eventually go away,” you don’t know what more he wants to say to you.

“but i… but you,”

“there are no but's here, if you came here looking for me because you’re realizing your feelings almost 8-9 years later then it's absurd because did you really think i would wait for you that long? i have a life now, i have a boyfriend and.. just grow up, you have a job here you should focus on that.”

you mentally made a note to stay the fuck away from this guy, because he was spewing some crazy, crazy shit. never in your wildest dreams did you ever think he would come back and be insistent on his feelings, it was all like a fever dream.

“am i that bad..?” he whispers softly, you look up at him, he has both of his hands on the table and his head hanging down. great, he's crying now. “i'm sorry i was so rude to you before.”

“look, it's fine, okay? we were both kids and i don't even hold it against you, i didn’t back then and i still don't. so go live your life and move on,”

you didn’t think you could bear to stay sitting there for a minute more, so you got up and went to the counter to pay and without a second glance, you left the cafè.

all the while, your childhood friend is still sitting there, not looking up.

“i.. i can’t do that,” and he looks up and wipes his tears, he didn’t come all the way here just to get disheartened so easily, did he?

[babacontainsmultitudes]

So it was established in the last episode that Taylor still believes in Santa (tbh I wouldn't be surprised if it's come up prior to this ep too but anyways-) so... Do you think (saint) Nicky been has portalling in every year since the betrayal to sneak in a gift for his son amongst the pile? That Cassandra doesn't even notice because it's just one among the many many presents she herself has bought and wrapped? But every year without fail... Taylor gets one gift that simply says "from: Nick" and well, obviously that has to mean it's from Santa (a conclusion which Nicky expects him to come to, and why he can sign his name at all, though he misses when he could just write "dad"). And one year when he's still quite young, a sleepy little Taylor actually catches Nicky in the act, and Nicky wishes more than anything that he could just *stay*, but instead he only softly tells Taylor to go back to bed, and Taylor thinks that Santa is a lot younger and a bit sadder than he expected, but what's he gonna do- not listen to Santa Claus? So he smiles meekly at the man he does not know to be his father, and hurriedly heads back to his room.

Also yes of course Nicky eats the fucking cookies left out of course he's not gonna pass up on free cookies (which are home-baked to top it off) come on that's a given.

[shitswiftiessay]

so taylor has put out another hit piece against joe (who’s surprised)

after buying winning the TIME person of the year award 2023, and having a gushing puff piece that’s supposed to paint her as this trailblazer for women and feminist icon…

she made sure to dedicate a significant portion of it to talking about her boyfriends. 🙄

so here are the cringeworthy excerpts where she’s talking about her latest victim boyfriend.

“Football is awesome, it turns out. I’ve been missing out my whole life.”

I love how she single handedly debunked the claim that swifties have been making, that taylor ALWAYS loved football and was a huge eagle fan (just bc she had an eagles shirt). now it’s basically confirmed that this football shit is just taylor’s newest PERSONALITY that she’s gonna wear for a few months, until she gets bored of it, and then she’ll throw travis under the bus and she’ll start siccing her fans against him.

“This all started when Travis very adorably put me on blast on his podcast, which I thought was metal as hell.”

god, someone bring me a BARF BUCKET please. 🪣 🤮 and since when is it “adorable” for a guy to PUT YOU ON BLAST because you wouldn’t go out with him or take his number?? that’s… very weird. i’m sure she wouldn’t find it “adorable” if she wasn’t interested in the guy. but anyway, i’m pretty sure she just saw an opportunity here and she took it. she can’t handle being single for more than a month, she needed a new man to make people forget about her matty healy era. and she’s LOVING the good press she’s getting for being “America’s royal couple” as her fans are calling them. but does she actually LOVE HIM? that, I remain yet to be convinced about.

and I love this part. “We would never be psychotic enough to hard-launch a first date.”

yeah, taylor’s not CRAZY you guys, it’s not like she said “I love you” to matty healy on stage back in may before breaking up with him 2 weeks later. nah. it’s not like she immediately bought a house next to her teenage boyfriend connor kennedy who was STILL IN HIGH SCHOOL when she started dating him. nah. that would be CRAZY. PSYCHOTIC even!!

and here comes the part where she starts passive aggressively smearing joe and we all know she’s on a smear campaign against joe now but it’s kind of pathetic that even while winning PERSON OF THE YEAR she has to make it about that.

so taylor obviously has a lot to say about her new relationship, and how proud they are of each other. but you know what I DON’T hear her saying? “I’m in love” or “I’m happy with him.”

and personally, i think that speaks volumes. if she was truly HAPPY with her new man she wouldn’t be doing all this shit. if you were around when taylor broke up with calvin and then immediately started hard-launching hiddleswift, taking pap photo after pap photo and being extremely “happy” she was and meeting his mom and all that shit…. and if you don’t see the parallels between what she’s doing NOW with travis, you’re either a blind fan or just flat out stupid.

because at least when she started dating joe she actually left her exes alone (at least for a little while), she was like “I forget their names now.” and you can tell she was happy without having to make a big show of it- “nobody’s heard from me for months, I’m doing better than I ever was.”

but now she’s acting like it’s the worst thing ever that she was “locking herself in her house for a lot of years,” and she KNOWS that her fans are going to take that and blame joe for it.

JUST LOOK at the quotes and replies of this tweet and this tweet to see how those insane fucking swifties are acting over this. EVERYTHING she does now is an incitement against joe and she knows it, it’s deliberate, it’s calculated.

and i guess she’s gotta bury him while she continues hanging out with a sexual abuse apologist so she can look like she has some kind of moral high ground.

also, the way she’s trying to erase the fact that 11 of the 15 songs on reputation were LOVE SONGS about joe, not “a goth-punk moment of female rage at being gaslit by an entire social structure.”

this woman is just narcissistic and straight up DELUSIONAL at this point. she’s so far up her own ass it’s nauseating. but i really hope that she keeps on talking. because the more she talks, the more people realise what a narcissistic clown she is. 🤡

[ewanmitchellcrumbs]

The Perfect Send Off

Pairing: Billy Taylor x femme Warnings: Mentions of war, slight coercion and corruption kink, loss of (male) virginity, smut. Word count: ~2.1k

Summary: Visiting war torn London, while helping to evacuate her sister and her children back to Cambridge, a young woman finds herself checked in at The Halcyon, and catches the attention of their bell boy, soon to be soldier, Billy. Based on this request.

Author's note: No tag list. Please follow @fics-by-ewanmitchellcrumbs and turn on post notifications. Community labels are for cops.

“Billy, don’t stare!” Peggy chastises her son with a swat to the arm. “Help the lady with her bags.”

Her eyes move appreciatively over the tall form of the sandy haired young man in front of her. He offers her a tight lipped smile, obviously flustered, considering the shade of scarlet he’s turning, before grabbing her suitcases from the marble floor of the hotel foyer. “Sorry, Mum,” he mumbles awkwardly to the dark haired woman beside him.

“It’s Mrs. Taylor in front of the guests, how many times?!” She hisses quietly, before turning back to her with a charming, painted-on-for-the-guests type smile. “Welcome to The Halcyon, madam. Billy is one of our bell boys, and will take your bags to your room for you now that you’re all checked in. My name’s Peggy, I operate the switchboard. Please don’t hesitate to ring down if you need anything. I hope you enjoy your stay.”

She watches Peggy walk away, each click of her high heels growing quieter as she retreats, before turning back to Billy, who stands there expectantly with her bags in his large hands.

Oh, I certainly will enjoy my stay.

She had arrived in London by train from Cambridge that morning, intending to leave again with her sister and her children. Since war had broken out, the frequent airstrikes over London had made it too dangerous for them to remain, so they’d be staying with her until it was safe to come back - provided they had a home to return to.

It would take a few days for her sister to get packed and have the house and children’s schooling in order, so she’d be staying at The Halcyon until they were ready to leave.

She spares a sideways glance at the bellboy as they stand in the lift together, the reddening of his face from having been caught staring at her only just beginning to fade. He’s younger than her by at least a couple of years, but has chiseled features that make him look handsome despite his bashful nature, and he fills out the grey slacks of his uniform more than adequately.

The reason for her trip to London is a serious matter, but she figures there’s no harm in having some fun with it.

“It’s nice that a young lad like you gets to work with their mother,” she says with a sultry smile, as the lift travels upwards.

His eyebrows raise, blue eyes widening slightly as he turns to her in the small space. “Oh, I’m not a lad, I’m a man…I mean, working with me mum, it’s not forever. Expecting me draft papers any day now…miss?”

He looks at her uncertainly and she huffs a quiet laugh as they step out of the lift together. “Yes, miss is fine, I don’t have a husband.”

Billy presses his lips together and averts his eyes, nodding slightly.

“So, you’re signed up to draft,” she says as they reach the door of her room, “how exciting for you. You’ll have to pop by and let me know your posting once you find out, I’d love to know.”

He falters, the suitcases he’d been carrying thumping heavily to the ground as he stoops to deposit them over the threshold of her room. He straightens, clasping his hands in front of him, and looks at her apologetically. “Oh…yeah, course…yeah, I will!”

She holds his gaze for a few moments, enjoying his barely disguised panic, before she speaks again. “I’d give you a tip, but I’m afraid I’m unsure of which bag I’ve put my purse in–”

“Oh, it’s no trouble, honestly, don’t worry,” he insists hurriedly.

“Nonsense, I have to give you something,” she purrs, “will this do?”

She leans up and presses a chaste kiss to his cheek, watching him carefully as she settles back on her feet.

His eyes go wide, the scarlet hue returning to his skin as he battles to hide a grin, tugging at the collar of his uniform. She hears him mutter “bloody hell” beneath his breath, as his eyes dart nervously down the corridor.

She wonders if he’s ever kissed anyone before, based on his reaction to a mere peck on the cheek she supposes he probably hasn’t.

Oh, my stay here is certainly going to be fun.

“Was that to your liking, Billy?” She asks with a smirk.

“Oh…oh yeah…thanks,” he says, swallowing thickly and trying to regain his composure.

Adorable.

“My pleasure. If that’s everything then, I’ll see you later?”

He nods, retreating from the doorway and down the corridor, sparing glances back over his shoulder at her standing there, until he’s back in the lift and out of sight.

It’s nearly two days later when she’s heading back up to her room in the late afternoon, having spent the day with her sister, that Billy rushes towards her, eyes lit up with excitement and a wide grin on his face.

“I got my posting this morning!” He tells her excitedly as she puts her key in her room door.

“Congratulations, soldier,” she says with a wink, “got time to come in and tell me about it, or have you got to get back to work?”

“Just finished me shift, actually, so I’ve got time.” He loosens the strap around his chin of his Halcyon branded cap, removing it as if to signify the fact. His dark blonde hair is slicked back against his head, neatly parted to the side.

“Great, come on in then.”

Billy trails behind her, his hat held gingerly in both hands as he glances around the room.

“Make yourself at home, Billy.” She gestures towards the bed and he perches on the edge of it, while she takes the armchair opposite. She has never seen anyone look less relaxed and has to stifle a laugh at how rigid his posture is.

“So, about your posting–”

“Yeah!” He suddenly becomes animated again, leaning forward and gesticulating each of his words, “Came in the post this mornin’, tried to find ya, but you were out. I’ve been put on the anti aircraft guns! Can you believe it? I’ll be shooting German planes outta the sky!”

She watches him intently as he speaks, the curve of his lips, the brightness of his eyes. He exudes confidence when he’s passionate, not a trace of shyness to be found and it’s incredibly attractive.

“That’s very brave of you,” she says, “I expect your sweetheart will be worried for you though.”

“Oh,” he furrows his brow, his gaze downcast, “no, there’s no one…no sweetheart.”

“That’s a shame,” she drawls, her smugness at the fact barely concealed. “Tell me, Billy, are you a virgin?”

He widens his eyes, mouth opening and closing as he flushes pink from the base of his neck, all the way to the tips of his ears. “N-no…I’ve had it off with loadsa girls…”

“Billy…” she chastises in a stern tone of voice.

He sighs, turning his hat over in his hands, shoulders slumping. “Yeah, I’m a virgin.”

She moves to sit beside him on the bed, her hand caressing his shoulder. “Nothing wrong with that,” she reassures him, “but perhaps you’d like not to be? Can’t send you off to war, never having known the touch of a woman.”

He audibly gulps, staring at her in disbelief, so she takes the initiative, leaning forward and pressing her lips to his.

He freezes at first, she can feel him trembling all over, but he softens as she’s about the pull away and reciprocates, his hat slipping from his hands and landing on the carpet with a soft thud. His mouth moves clumsily against her own, over eager and inexperienced, yet there is something endearing about it. She longs to show Billy the tenderness he deserves.

“I–I don’t know what I’m doing,” he whispers nervously against her lips once they part for air.

“It’s okay,” she soothes him, caressing his cheek, “just lay back. Let me take care of you.”

He nods, moving back against the bedspread.

She takes her time stripping him of his bellboy uniform. Billy is undeniably skinny, but his long, lean limbs are corded with wiry muscle, his chest and shoulders well defined and broad as they’re revealed to her as she sheds his jacket, shirt and vest.

His chest rises and falls rapidly with anxious, shallow breaths, his eyes glued to her as she removes her own clothing. His lips part as she bares herself before him, trembling hands reaching out tentatively to trace over her naked flesh.

Her eyes widen with shock and admiration and she removes his briefs. She had not been expecting Billy to be quite so well endowed; his erection is thick and reaches almost to his navel, the ruddy tip glistening with arousal.

Billy hisses through his teeth, brow furrowing as she takes him in hand to roll a sheath over the length of him. She can tell from the way he twitches against her palm that he won’t last long.

“You okay?” She whispers as she moves to straddle him.

His expression is almost pained, only able to nod as he looks up at her with desperation in his eyes.

She sinks slowly down onto him, her jaw going slack at the stretch, hearing Billy groan beneath her.

“Oh…oh god…” he grits out, as her hips sink fully against his.

Trailing her fingertips over his bare chest, while giving herself a moment to adjust, she soothes him with a soft kiss.

He hums into it, his hips bucking slightly upwards and she pulls back with a grin, rolling her hips against his, delighting in the way his thickness drags against her sensitive walls.

He gasps softly, head thrown back against the pillows, a few strands of hair coming loose from his carefully waxed style.

“You’re beautiful,” he mutters.

His grip on her hips is vicelike as she rocks against him, she feels impossibly full and yet already anticipates this being an unsatisfying ending for her - she can feel him throbbing inside of her, as he pants hard beneath her.

Her backside slaps softly against his thighs once, twice, three times, and all too soon his eyes are screwing shut as he cries out in ecstasy, twitching as he spills into the condom.

She stills, gazing down at him as he opens his eyes, skin flushed as he gasps for air. He looks like a work of art, no shame or fear of making a fool of himself guiding his behaviour, just utterly lost in the moment.

“Sh-shit…sorry…” he whispers, as she climbs off of him. He pulls off the rubber and discards it in the bedside waste paper bin. “That was really quick.”

She smiles, guiding him back to her side and laying back. “It was your first time, that was going to happen. You’ll last longer next time.”

He grins down at her. “Next time?”

“If you want to, that is.”

“Course I do!”

He kisses her with more confidence, his hands snaking a trail down her body, squeezing greedily at her curves. After a few minutes of their languid kisses and caresses, she can feel him stirring to life against her thigh again.

“Could I be on top this time?” He whispers into her ear, settling between her legs, once he’s found another sheath.

She nods, sighing in pleasure as she feels him slip back inside of her. The change in angle and sensation of his weight on top of her heightens the feeling as each of his gentle strokes brushes deep within her.

While it feels good, it’s not quite enough to get her there, and as she feels his thrusts becoming less controlled, she knows she needs to help him to help her.

“Give me your hand,” she says huskily, taking it and guiding it between their bodies. 

She presses his fingers to her pearl, guiding them to stroke her in quick, tight circles. “Just like that,” she tells him.

He’s quick to learn, stroking her in tandem with each snap of his hips. He groans low into the crook of her neck, stilling as he spends himself a second time, but the movement of his fingers never relents. The combination of his ministrations against her bud and him pulsating within her drive her over the edge, and she climaxes with a moan, clenching around Billy, causing his breath to catch in his throat.

He rolls off of her after a moment, throwing his arm behind his head and pulling her to his chest. “Could get used to this,” he murmurs with a lazy smirk.

“Won’t you get the sack?” She asks jokingly.

“Nah, leaving anyway, aren’t I?”

“Right you are,” she smiles, snuggling against him.

“You up for another send off then? I could die, y’know.”

“That’s manipulative, Billy!” She giggles, swatting his chest.

“Is it working though?”

“Yeah, yeah, it is…” she says quietly, feeling his fingertips dig into the soft flesh of her thigh.

[taylortruther]

I'm very curious about clara bow, especially because it seems to me that it would be taylor comparing herself to clara bow and how she felt during the relationship. But that being the last song I wonder if it would be like a hopeful song (if the tracklist progresses linearly when it comes to how she felt with time) and in that case I wonder if it will be how she doesn't want to make the same decisions as clara bow made? (Idk i don't really know a lot about her other than what I have read on tumblr) or do you think it could be a sad song like hoax? When it comes to closing the album

i think it could be a lament for all the women who were forced into boxes from which they could never break free, and who suffered the consequences if they didn't make themselves smaller or more palatable. the women who tried and tried and overcame so much adversity, but still couldn't do it "perfectly." who were gaslit and provoked endlessly until their downfall. and i think it will touch on how society, at large, does this to women... but the men in their intimate lives also take part.

reading about clara bow (and i am not an expert), it's obvious why taylor might relate:

clara was considered scandalous at the time due to her sex life and many relationships, but she had an intangible "it factor" that made her beloved and yet more widely criticized. she had some major disagreements/issues with studios, and her mental health was in decline, which led to her leaving the spotlight. that's when she met rex bell...

(also, reminds me of how taylor spoke about zelda fitzgerald's biography. obviously we have tlgad about rebekah harkness. she's spoken about liking sylvia plath. there's a theme here. even the main character in rebecca - fictional, but still.)

[cosettepontmercys]

I truly can’t pinpoint when/what exactly changed about Taylor’s fans/fandom but the last few years (especially the midnights release) has really soured things for me and it’s honestly quite disappointing as someone who genuinely enjoys her music and thinks she’s a great artists. how did we get to the point of not even being able to voice an opinion about taylor without being crucified online. or if heaven forbid you dislike a song/album or enjoy the work of one of her exes (john mayer, the 1975, calvin harris, etc)

i’ve always been very fascinated/intrigued by the relationship between celebrities and their fans. and i think it’s really interesting to look back and think about how taylor built her fanbase by making herself as palatable/relatable/approachable as possible. like secret sessions, t party/loft 89/rep room, swiftmas, lover diaries, etc — all of which allow for fan interaction — but also relies on people getting noticed which then in turn encourages people to be as vocal? extra? whatever it is. which then feeds into the "who is a bigger / better fan" competition. i'm speaking from personal experience here, as someone who has liked her since debut — but i think a lot of this is also rooted in how much of the world hated taylor swift prior to ... i want to say folklore, really — like it was deeply uncool to like taylor swift, to be a swiftie, etc. and because a lot of that early criticism was rooted so much in misogyny, i think fans felt the need to (over the years) defend her — and i was one of those! i still am, when i feel like people are criticizing her unfairly. but i think that lends into the "taylor swift has never done anything wrong, and she's perfect and if you disagree then you're against us and you're a fake fan" mentality.

and then i think there's an element of ... not necessarily a superiority complex, but a something among fans who have met taylor. it's a genius marketing move, intentions aside. taylor's music is very personal — and taylor's marketing, and persona is very personal, in a way that other artists prior to taylor weren't, i think. relatability sells. you can see it in the way that people talk about her, and her music. which is very different from the way people talk about other artists — and obviously there isn't anyone else out there with the amount of fame/popularity as her, but you don't see the same amount of fanfiction-writing personal-life-speculating-projection onto other artists' lyrics as you do with taylor. and i think that when someone is that vulnerable with their thoughts, it makes it easy for people to think that they know them personally.

and i think that — as much as i love taylor — it's important to talk about her white woman feminism mentality. and i think that also seeps into how her fanbase interacts with her. the ginny & georgia "joke" is what comes to mind the quickest, but there are countless instances of taylor's white woman feminism — and her benefiting from it. and obviously it was in her right to call out a misogynistic comment, especially one directed at her, but not saying anything when the actress got so much hate for a line she didn't write ... made me feel a bit 🥴. it's interesting to see who taylor will choose to align herself with, i guess is all i'm saying.

i've really taken a step back from taylor — not just because the fandom is exhausting ( the amount of things i've seen about her, joe, travis, etc. is ... something! it's all projection! we do not know anything about these people other than what they choose to show us! ) but also because of her saying that she wanted to be on the right side of history and then over and over again choosing to be increasingly passive and silent. she will call herself an ally but won’t even talk about queer rights; she won’t talk about the literal genocide that’s going on. gun control, abortion rights, anything at all. it's just "go vote" but even that is incredibly passive. but she will take time to remind us to buy new variants, and to stream her music, and that her ex sucks.

i think there was a huge shift that started with folklore/evermore, just given that there weren't a lot of albums being put out during that time, the overwhelming public reception to it — a lot of people who previously didn't care for (or disliked) taylor started to like her, to give her a second chance, etc. then we get into the rerecordings era/midnights/etc., which started off with fearless and nostalgia and then became "how quickly can i put out the next thing". and bailey @placeinthisworld posted this earlier, which i fully agree with. it's about the next award, the next milestone. it's just all quantity. it's overexposure.

and then we have the joe alwyn breakup and the public response to that was also ... interesting. like i saw people crying over it, or saying that love is a lie, removing things from their playlists, acting like they were the ones who had been broken up with. which is just ... odd, given that we aren't the ones in the relationship. and now there are all these comments about being a "joe defender". and then with taylor dating travis, it feels almost like some weird american pipe dream unfulfilled fantasy for so many people — the singer and the american football player. and obviously, i want her to be happy! i don't care who she dates! but i do think the public reception about her and travis has been ... incredibly odd, and i think that the way people talk about her and travis is just ... very ... off-putting and is very rooted in some weird ... stuff. "she finally gets to be small :(((((" is such a weird thing to say. it feels like there's even more projection and self-insert-y stuff with her dating travis, which is a level i did not think was possible from her fans (and more so, the general public).

i have not felt this ... detached and impassive about a taylor release, ever, and it just makes me incredibly sad because i love her music, and am excited about the work, just not excited about the public reception, the public autopsy of her and joe's relationship, or the noise, and i know that internet spaces (and spaces in general) are what we curate, but it's also difficult when she is everywhere.

[chrkrose]

I mean I am all for girls sticking together, especially against someone like Joe Jonas who I have side-eye since forever, but if that means fawning over Taylor Swift I guess I'll pass. Especially when she did something very very similar to someone with waaaaay less power than she has in the industry. She has much more in common with Joe Jonas than with Sophie Turner. Obviously, the situations vary in terms of Sophie being a woman (so misogyny adds an awful layer to what she's going through, which Joe Alwyn doesn't have to face) and the mother of Joe's kids, which makes Joe Jonas' actions even worse, but how is it that people are forgetting how Taylor went on her own "smear campaign" against Joe Alwyn just because he dared to break up with her and /or not be willing to marry her? She painted the guy as if he was insecure and jealous of her success, implied he was holding her back, went on pap walks to drive the point home that he was keeping her "hidden" and preventing her from being her own self, made all of her friends unfollow him on social media, all of this knowing exactly how that would look like, and how that would weaponize her fans against him. The dude can't do as much as take a subway without his name going trending on Twitter with her insane fan base calling him all kinds of names. There were fans even wishing for him to kill himself, and the tweet had tons of likes. Never mind the fact she made a point of dating a racist misogynistic right after and weaponized that relationship too (because you can't tell me part of her motivation to state in public she had been the happiest she has ever been, to have the guy in all of her concerts singing along her songs when she built the narrative that Joe was unsupportive of her success wasn't a way of getting back at him). And according to her own lyrics, Joe Alwyn has a history of dealing with mental health issues, like anxiety and depression. And yet, Taylor did all of that to the person she dated for six years. It wasn't a marriage with kids, but the relationship lasted longer than Joe Jonas and Sophie's marriage and almost the entirety of Joe Jonas and Sophie's relationship. I see no difference between Joe Jonas and Taylor Swift, she just gets away with being an awful person. And unfortunately for Joe Alwyn, people bought the narrative that Taylor sold out there about him. Luckily, Joe Jonas wasn't able to stick the "Sophie is a bad mother and unfit partner" narrative to her. I also can't help but think this outing is much more PR Taylor swift seeing an opportunity to come out as a “girl’s girl” than Taylor Swift reaching out to a friend. Afterall, where was this attitude when people were calling her out for dating a racist misogynistic? Hmm yeah, she can fuck off. I also am going to be super cynical here, and it's something I've noticed about her for ages now. To me, she feels a certain validation in other women's failed relationships. Especially with a woman who got something Taylor wished had had herself.