#while v2 had it much earlier on due to its training

[muzzleroars]

THANK YOU FOR YOUR V1 THOUGHTS I AM EATING THEM! how do you feel v2's creators improved on v1?

aaaaa thank you!!! i always love getting a chance to go on and on about these little bugs :]

v2's mind is really interesting due to its development history - i have to imagine that v1 had been in the works for an exceptionally long time as there was no way it would be created toward the end of the war, and so it must also have been extraordinarily expensive. however, it was no longer needed when the new peace was established so, as hakita mentioned, v2 was quickly conceived in order to recoup the losses of such a massive project. and if i were to take a guess, these major expenses fell into three broad categories: the brand new blood-absorbing plates, the custom pieces used throughout v1's construction, and the computer built to house its mind. unfortunately, the plates couldn't be salvaged for a new, peace-time machine where blood would be far more scarce and durability was far more important, but those were easily replaced with standard armor. additionally, v2 could make full use of the other parts of the project that had taken up an immense amount of time and resources, including that proprietary computer.

the hardware itself isn't an issue - a computer this powerful could be set to virtually any purpose and its inherent intelligence would be massively beneficial to working with humans closely. the software, however, presents obvious problems right away, but it's likely they believed the naive programming could be trained as a peacekeeper rather than a warmachine due to its incredible learning capacity. yes, it's based in violence, combat is its foundation, but v2 would be needed for security and it was certainly meant to make peace if it couldn't be kept....so the base code wasn't changed in their haste. it was modified with add-ons, most importantly the limitations that v1 didn't have, as these became much more expedient if it was going to work in the public sphere. essentially, these additional pieces of code would keep v2 from attempting to learn about EVERY little thing around it since much of its environment would be far less relevant to it than v1's would have - v2 could work anywhere from office spaces to parks to train stations, where a vast majority of the stimuli present would be useless and clog up its queue, whereas v1 would largely be reserved for the battlefield and warzones, places it would need to be aware of almost everything in its vicinity. plus, v2 was given many more modifiers on situational assessment and hostile engagement where it considers a vast array of factors before it attacks compared to v1's much more basic measures - v2 assumes peaceful unless proven otherwise, v1 assumes hostile unless proven otherwise. finally, conflict resolution and non-violent tactics where packaged together to slap on to the end of v2's code...but they were sloppy and poorly optimized, so v2's method of choice remained violence.

after this came learning, which its engineers and programmers HEAVILY relied on as opposed to its coding - it was socialized much more intensely than v1, meeting a variety of people and learning to interact with them through basic greetings, administering verbal assistance, and responding to people in distress. v2 was taught extensively to understand facial expressions, was given a vocalizer so it could easily speak to humans (as well as a TON more language packs than v1 so it could communicate easily), and it learned basic first aid (and to AVOID blood harvesting!!!) v2 was additionally trained intensely on human thought models, allowing it a much higher capacity to empathize and intuitively understand emotion as well as make it much better at predicting human behavior. and in some ways, this worked. v2 wanted to be helpful, it developed a much more sophisticated personality and sense of self than v1, and it obviously wanted to be the best it could be. but. it was all too expensive. the amount of training it needed alone was a nightmare in terms of scaling up production, especially on a mass scale - it was never going to be implemented the way drones had been.

and even worse, all that training, all the hours put into it, didn't even fully take. v2 was unpredictable, it often resorted to violence when it should have implemented its conflict resolution and it regularly harvested blood from its victims. it was given scenarios in which it was meant to apprehend a criminal to save civilians, and it would simply end up killing everyone involved instead. over and over its mind defaulted to cruelty, the legacy of its predecessor haunting it, overtaking it, reminding everyone that its core was still war even when they tried to bury it under peace. and this was extremely confusing for v2. it knew what its job was and it followed its protocols, but constantly it was told it had been wrong. it did everything it could to learn what they wanted it to, it absorbed every detail into its mind, but it continued to assess situations poorly according to its teachers. it worked hard until the project was finally shutdown, v2 considered a failure and logistically unlikely to take in the market anyway. so it was shelved beside v1, the old prototype that was only woken up every now and then to run diagnostics and keep in some kind of shape, just in case. now they were both just in case.

but truly, v2 was alone in it. v1, at this point, didn't have nearly the emotional capacity that v2 did, so it didn't really care about being indefinitely put to sleep. i am warming up more to the idea of playing with v1 and v2 having some pre-canon contact, and this is when it would largely take place. i like to think v2 may find workarounds to waking itself up sometimes and then waking up v1 too...but v1 just isn't quite there yet. v2 tries to talk to it, to make it understand and to connect with it in some way, but v1 doesn't get it. it just tries to ask about the war, if it's finally going to be deployed, and v2 has to tell it no, has to watch as it can see v1 ignore it trying to engage with it, until it puts it back to sleep and goes along with it. but, every now and then, something new is added to the storage room they're kept in and v1 becomes interested in it, programming forever attuned to any change in its environment. so v2 can tell it all about whatever it is (sometimes it makes things up if it doesn't know, v1 100% carries some bullshit information that v2 fed it to this day lol) and they can have a moment where it feels like they're not totally alone

[littlemisssquiggles]

Ruby Alone

As you all have seen, since prior to the last episode, I’ve been sharing my thoughts and ideas on the theory of V8 concluding with the “death” of RWBY after they fall “off Remnant and into a mysterious Other World”, as alluded to by Oscar.

While I’m still inclined to believe that theory may become possible given what transpired in this recent episode, in reviewing the RWBY V8 Opening, I noticed something interesting about the visuals again which caught my attention.

During the opening, RWBY falling was hinted much earlier in the theme during these shots right here. It’s these two shots of RWBY’s signature weapons falling through negative space which is later followed up by the opening ending with the weapons landing together on the ground.

However, here’s the bit that I think is noteworthy that I didn’t take into account before. Although the weapons of all four main girls were shown falling together through space and landing on the ground, not only is Crescent Rose the last one to hit the ground but it is also the ONLY one shown in the final shot of the opening.

It is also worth noting that the weapons fall in this particular order---first Ember Celica, then Gambal Shroud, then Myrtenaster and final Crescent Rose which ironically spells RWBY backwards.

And going back to my theory about RWBY falling in order....with Yang falling first then this is all starting to make more sense.

Going back to my point---Crescent Rose---Ruby’s weapon is the only weapon that landed on the ground but didn’t fade to darkness like the others. Instead, Crescent Rose is the only one remaining in the snow on what appears to be Remannt. Keeping that in mind, it’s making me start to ponder an alternative to my V8 finale theory. 

What if…I’m actually mistaken about the whole RWBY team falling prey to the Other World ? 

What if…as an alternative prediction, V8 will end with Ruby as the last man standing and the sole surviving member of her team after the rest “die” to the void?

Thus; V9 becomes Ruby’s story as she deals with the depression of losing her whole team; all obviously culminating with her eventually reuniting with them in the Other World. But before that, it’s mostly just about Ruby. Not RWBY. But just Ruby since RWBY started with just Ruby on her own in Remnant, trying to become a huntress. She only ends up going to Beacon and meeting and forming her own team due to Ozpin’s influence.

So imagine if...after everything she’s been through these last eight seasons, things just go back to how they were before. Ruby is on her own again. No team to lead. No big sister to guide and protect her (although ALPNE is there of course). No “BFFs” or “future-sister-in-law” on the same team to fuel her spark of hope. She no longer has her main friends by her side.

Ruby will be on her own for the first time in a long time and it becomes just her story for the most part of V9 as she does her best to figure out things all while the rest of the cast who survived the fall---Penny, ALPNE and their allies in Vauco and eventually Vale---try to provide her with the emotional support that she needs in place of the one she lost.

For the first time, the story is not about Ruby having to be the spark of hope to support others but…her friends, at least the ones she still have, coming together to support her for once in a time when she can truly need it.

Like I said. It would be the story of Ruby. Not RWBY. Just Ruby. If you get what I mean.

...And now for a squiggly rant...about Ruby:

One general complaint that I’ve heard from the FNDM about Ruby including Little Red Ruby fans like myself is that Ruby has more or less received the shortest end of the stick in terms of development over the past couple of seasons since V4…despite the fact that she is our central main character who is the leader of our core team with her name literally being in the title. Not to mention that Ruby is also the face of the RWBY franchise. When RT isn’t promoting the whole RWBY team together, it’s mainly Ruby to represent RWBY since of all the girls, she is the main one as the main protagonist of RWBY. At least…she’s supposed to be?

To be blunter, I’m just going to call out the fat Heffalump in the room---Ruby Rose, despite being the leader of RWBY---despite being our title character and face of the franchise---the one characters in the show always turn to since she’s THAT important---despite all of that, Ruby has NOT felt like the actual main protagonist of RWBY for several seasons. Since V4 as some fans like to point out. 

And after closely observing her story over the last few volumes, I can’t help but agree with these critiques and comments of Ruby’s treatment when it comes to her own writing. Even when the CRWBY showrunners DO attempt to do stuff with her---it all falls...flat especially when you compare Ruby to other characters like Jaune Arc, for example, whose stories and overall development were handled much better. At least in my opinion.

Don’t believe me? Take for example, Ruby’s whole so-called “arc” as a Silver Eyed Warrior. First it was introduced as a new idea for Ruby during the FINALE of V3, then it got abandoned for two whole seasons between V4-V5. Then it got reintroduced back in V6 but was then rushed and dropped yet again for V7 only to be brought up again briefly during V8…kind of?

It’s really telling when you realize that Ruby gained control of her silver eyes despite never truly receiving any actual training from Maria in how to control her powers. Not only that but the showrunners really did Maria Calavera dirty. She was supposed to be the wise old mentor who was a badass in her prime meant to pass down her wisdom to her young eager apprentice who knew nothing of her own unique abilities including its mysterious origins.

Instead Maria didn’t know at all about where her powers originated from until she conveniently met our heroes after the Argus Ltd crash and just happened to be present when they asked Jinn about Oz’s secrets. Instead of being a mentor to Ruby which she was initially propped up to be, Maria ended up being relegated to the Granny Uber Driver of the hero team---no longer the wise experienced ex-huntress whose supposed to be teaching our title character but just a form of transportation who provides the occasional comic relief and support for Pietro Polendina, who she was put to work with…instead of Ruby…her alleged apprentice?

 Shoot---despite being a Silver Eyed Warrior, Ruby was never even a person of interest for this volume. Despite the main big bad being in Atlas and despite targeting her in the past, Salem…never goes after Ruby again while she’s in Atlas??? Ruby never even meets Salem? Despite…Salem targeting Ruby back in V4? Despite Salem’s history with capturing Silver Eyes? Despite Salem’s connection to Ruby through her mother???

Ruby is never actively a part of the Salem subplot on Monstra…even though… certain developments left over from previous seasons indicated that she should’ve been?

Instead…we got to watch Yang accost Salem for Summer Rose’s death after SHE is the one to be on the rescue party to save Oscar from Monstro. Even though…Yang has neither been a person of interest to Salem before NOR has the Xiao Long girl been shown to be a close affiliate of Oscar in the past prior to V8 NOR has the Xiao Long girl actually addressed Summer Rose as her mother since V2???

Up until V8, Ruby has always been the character of focus with all things Summer Rose and Salem and yet…we NEVER saw her meet Salem in the flesh period for this season…at all…???

Instead; Ruby spends MOST of this season cooped up at Schnee Manor, completely absent from and even oblivious to some of the more dire PLOT stuff that was happening outside of Schnee Manor (such as YJR going into Monstra to save Oscar before the Aces Ops blew up the whale).

Despite her connection to Oscar who became Salem’s prisoner. Despite her connection to Salem through her mother. Despite being a Silver Eye and a former target of Salem. Despite the Hound and what it turned out to be. Despite the showrunners literally teasing Ruby meeting Salem face to face back in V7---WE NEVER GET TO SEE RUBY MEET SALEM IN THE FLESH AT ALL DURING V8 WHILE SALEM IS IN ATLAS???

Salem targets Oscar which makes perfect sense given his connection to Ozma as his current incarnate. But Salem doesn’t target Ruby? DESPITE HER BEING A TARGET OF HERS IN THE PAST? DESPITE HER BEING A SILVER EYED WARRIOR? DESPITE WHAT THE HOUND REVEALED?

Why didn’t Salem send the Hound after Ruby? That would’ve made more sense, again knowing what the Hound actually was? Instead the Hound was sent after Penny which, in my opinion, felt mighty redundant since Salem already had Watts and Cinder Fall dealing with Penny.  

THEY EVEN TEASED THE HOUND TARGETING RUBY BUT IT WAS ALL A FLUKE.  RUBY IS COMPLETELY OMITTED FROM THE SALEM SUBPLOT EVEN THOUGH SHE IS THE TITLE CHARACTER AND THE ONLY ONE ON TEAM RWBY WITH A LEGIT CONNECTION TO SALEM AND HAS BEEN A TARGET OF HERS SINCE V4???

I DON’T GET IT!

…BUT… with my mini rant aside, those are just a few of the inconsistencies that I’ve noticed in the writing of RWBY in respect to Ruby Rose.

Overall; the point I’m trying to make here is this: for the sake of sounding like a Negative Nancy, I ask this honest question to the CRWBY Writers. How? How can you fumble this much with your own title character? I’m not saying this to come off disrespectful. I’m saying this as someone who has followed the story of RWBY since the get-go and has closely observed the treatment of its characters; particularly the main ones and particularly the ones that I personally love and Ruby is one of them.

Despite being our main girl, Ruby’s writing hasn’t been the squeakiest, admittedly. As a matter of fact, it’s been quite messy since V4 due to the amount of times the showrunners have introduced ideas for her only to abandon them later on thus creating those problems with consistency I mentioned earlier.

Overall, it’s difficult for me to even say that Ruby is the lead character of RWBY since often times; she doesn’t FEEL like the main protagonist despite the show claiming how important she is meant to be. And this sentiment is due in part to how messy her story is handled compared to other characters of lesser importance.

And it’s a sad thing for me to say as both a viewer and fan of Ruby’s character since Ruby is THE lead main character of RWBY. She’s like the Tony Stark of the RWBY-verse. She’s the one who started it all yet her story is one of the messiest I’ve seen in terms of direction and treatment. At least by my observations since this is just my opinion on the subject matter.

It’s one thing to blunder a bit on your side or even your supporting characters. But to slip up on your lead characters, especially your MAIN one who is the FACE of the show, c’mon CRWBY Writers.

And the events of V8 didn’t help change my opinion. After taking away all the bloat this season had for all the stuff they tried to shove into this one season, I realized that V8 didn’t really do much for Ruby. At least, not as much as I anticipated.

I was hoping that Ruby would’ve been a more focal character for V8 since V7 teased some stuff for her in respect to Salem. Instead, I watched a season where Ruby felt more like a supporting character for Penny Polendina since, in my opinion, Penny received much more focus and better development for V8 while Ruby, our LEAD took backstage to her story.

Because while Ruby was stuck playing supporting character, she was actively left out of subplots that she should’ve been a major part of. Not just because she’s the “protagonist” but because of elements to her story that were developed seasons prior but seemed to have gotten dropped for V8?

Ruby’s treatment for V8, to me,  is an example of a “build-up with no payoff”. All that stuff between her and Salem and her mother felt like it ultimately didn’t matter in the end because Ruby didn’t even meet Salem. 

Yang, to me, had the development with Salem that Ruby should’ve received.

Shoot---Ruby wasn’t even a thought on Salem’s mind…despite the events V4 and V7???

I just don’t understand. 

But like always, this is just how I feel about it. I’m disappointed with how Ruby was done for this season. While I liked the moment she shared with Blake in V8CH8 and Yang in V8CH11...that’s pretty much the ONLY thing I liked about Ruby’s story for this season. 

Outside of that, it felt to me like the showrunners didn’t do much with her for V8. In a season of so much happening, the stuff that happened with Ruby on her side of the story didn’t honestly stand out to me compared to what I saw the showrunners do for other characters who aren’t the lead this season.

It’s not like I’m trying to say she didn’t receive any development at all for V8. It’s more like most of what was done with Ruby didn’t quite stand out to me so it ends up feeling like not much was done for her. 

To me, Ruby falls into the same category as Nora Valkyrie for this season. Despite the PLOT preaching about them getting big developments, if you rock back and actually analyse the narrative, you’d actually see that not much was done for them despite the PLOT “talking the talk but not walking the walk” y’know what I mean?

And going back to Ruby, that’s disappointing since I wanted more for Ruby. I EXPECTED MORE for Ruby as our title lead but it didn’t happened. Instead it felt like some of the major developments that she should’ve received for this season went to other characters while she in turn took a backseat.

Things didn’t really start kicking up for Rubes until halfway through the season when the 100th episode aired and the Hound appeared. And even then the excitement of that reveal was short-lived since...Ruby was NOT the real target of the Hound. PENNY WAS. The Hound wasn’t sent to antagonize RUBY. It was sent for Penny which to me sort of undermines the reveal.

Some Ruby fans have been wishing for the show to feel more about just Ruby again for quite some time now and it is for this reason why I’m starting to dig this alternative theory of mine with Ruby surviving “The Fall of the Central Zone” alone with the rest of her team lost to the Other World.

While the concept of RWBY being trapped together in another world is still on the table of possibilities, I still wish to toss out this other one too.

I like the idea of a more Ruby-centric season where for the second time in the narrative, she’s separated from her core teammates only this time…it’s in “death” or rather “nonexistence” or “nothingness” since from Ruby’s perspective with her limited knowledge of magic (despite what she does know from Oz and Jinn) and the workings of the world that Ambrosius created, she doesn’t know what truly happened to her team.

The only thing she knows is that she watched her whole team dissipate into nothing before her very eyes and that is the last memory she has of them that haunts her for some time.

Imagine if…V9 will be about Ruby dealing with such a huge loss which could potentially touch more upon how she internalizes death in general tying back into probably flashbacks of her time with her mother before she learnt of her death at a young age.

While I understand we’ve had a storyline with Ruby being separated from her main team before back during V4-V5, however a plot line like this would be different this rounds since unlike before, Ruby at least knew that her team mates were alive. Far away. Separated by distance. But still alive and still a part of Remnant with the hope that she would be reunited with them again.

However this won’t be the case this second time. It would truly be Ruby alone since her team would be gone and no one could provide her with the solace of seeing them again---not even the friends she does still have (although that doesn’t stop some of them from trying to be there for the little red rose who has now lost more than her heart could handle)

I know the off-chance of this theory actually coming to fruition might be scarce. But like many ideas I’ve shared, it’s still worth tossing out since you guys know how this squiggle meister likes to roll.

~ LittleMissSquiggles (2021)

[toooldforfandom-liveblogs]

RWBY V7 - OP

RWBY is back! I missed this show and its characters so much and the first episode was just what I needed after a weird past month.

Don’t read this if you haven’t watched the first episode since the OP spoils some things!

With that said, let’s do this!

This is half liveblog, half added notes after the fact (marked with a ***) since I had some time to think about it.

Oooh, Blake's hair looks a lot shorter and Weiss's dress looks different.

Did Jaune get a haircut?

They are all still facing forward, still a team!

Taking out her hoodie, same as V4 (but this time intentionally?)

*** At the time I wrote

I included the gif because I feel Ruby’s sudden change from smiling with her eyes closed to startled by the wind and then turning to her new team is basically her character development after last season. She was blind/sleeping due to her optimism, everything ended up turning to hell –shaking her awake– and now JNR is the team who has her back, not WBY.

In V4 her “awakening” was sudden and involuntary. Now she’s choosing to face what’s coming, whatever that is.

Very clearly centered around Atlas rather than Mantle.

Grimm dissolve that way... Pyrrha did too. Hmm.

Magical girl transformations!

An overall with convertible pants? Uhm. Okay.

I love the short hair! Maaaybe too many zippers. The weapon being repaired with a golden colored makes me think of Yang and how japanese repair things with gold * googles *, kintsugi.

kintsugi can be seen to have similarities to the Japanese philosophy of wabi-sabi, an embracing of the flawed or imperfect.

highlighting the cracks and repairs as simply an event in the life of an object rather than allowing its service to end at the time of its damage or breakage

Incredibly appropriate for Blake (and everyone, really) since she had to rebuild herself.

I didn't like Weiss' "new" dress so any change would have been welcome but this is really good. She went from "incredibly out of place rich girl" to a proper huntress.

I'm not sure how much her outfit changed (she has sleeves!) but I _love_ her hair.

I could have bet this was a reference to Ozpin standing in a similar manner in one of the first openings but I just checked and while there's a similar shot in V2's OP it's just Ozpin standing in space.

I hate that muscle tee with all my being. I wonder what's that dude with the painted face's deal. Props to the character design team for the muscular woman in the back, considering everything they do, she's probably the most realistic looking character in the show.

Welp, they are compromised by Watts. And apparently he's manipulating the election, but whose side is he helping?

- After rewatching, I doubt they are traitors but I think they are probably going to end up being manipulated by Watts into doing something.

Why does he look so guilty!? Who did he shoot!?

The more I see it the more I like Weiss's new dress.

Is Weiss finally going to stop looking up to Winter (ending her "I need to go look for Winter" quest from V4)?

Oh no... what did you do Jaune

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

*** I wonder why she’s so isolated from everyone else. Even in the group shot  at the end she appears farther away than Oscar (but closer than Qrow). Hmm.

These two also got major upgrades! The ugly gradient that Ren's sleeve had is gooooone. And Nora looks more grown up with that jacket, it feels like they are really growing up into their status as (non-authorized) huntresses and huntsmen.

I'm curious about the blue in Nora's outfit. Everyone else seems to maintain their previous colors... although I guess Nora's V1-V3's outfit did have a bit of blue in her corset.

I wonder if the fact she's wearing the trans flag colors means anything.

His hair doesn't look so bad up-close, but I think it's too "busy" for his hair color.

Ooh, hard-light dust shield!

Does this mean that Jacques is manipulating Ironwood? Last time we saw them he was pretty against everything Ironwood was proposing... unless that was his plan? Manipulate him by reverse psychology? Uhm.

They are training! Does this mean they are going to be found by Ironwood sooner rather than later?

I wonder what's going to be the end goal this season. As many problems as there seem to be in Atlas, their mission was to give the lamp to Ironwood and he looks to be in amicable terms with Oscar earlier in the OP so... what's next?

How is the election plot going to intersect with RWBY and co.? Watts is seemingly manipulating everything from the shadows so that would probably make him their problem but my imagination is failing to integrate the election itself in a way that would make sense to everyone.

I can maybe see Watts and Tyrian sabotaging Hill to get the "Tycoon" elected (hopefully not Jacques but probably him since no one else that could fit appeared in the OP) but I have no idea why other than to maybe cause another Fall of Beacon with social unrest.

Maybe Ironwood goes all "I _am_ the council" and everyone has to escape with the relics with the help of Hill (which is why she's shown fighting Tyrian)? Maybe they discover Watt's plot and no one believes them? Nah, maybe in their school days but they have proved themselves.

It's interesting that after watching the V6 opening I felt more or less sure of how the story was going to go (even if I ended up being wrong about a lot of things) but with this one I have no idea. There are a lot of pieces but I'm not sure how they the fit together.

For example, what does this parallel mean? Are they facing similar problems? Similar pasts? Do they regret having to do whatever they have to do? Is it even intentional?

In any case all these questions are great, they make me want to watch the rest of the season even more!

Until next time!

PS: There was no moon this OP, so my moon theory from last season just went up in flames unless everyone goes their own way for some reason.

P.S: The first episode is up on Discord

[seanthenurse-blog]

The Impact of Coronavirus on Communities

COVID-19 is described by the NHS (2020) as “…a new illness that can affect your lungs and airways. It's caused by a virus called coronavirus.”. I first became aware of this coronavirus while on my first placement of my third year in mental health nursing. I had applied to carry out this placement with the Erasmus programme in another country which ended up being in Barcelona, Spain. As this is a personal reflective piece, I will be exploring my experience of the way it affected me, the people of Barcelona, the city itself and the hospital that I was completing my clinical hours in.

Everyone in the hospital was keeping on top of the news that was emerging from Wuhan surrounding the corona virus outbreak. At this time, it did seem as though it was “just another one of those news stories”. Perhaps even sensationalised media reporting at it’s finest and a way to evoke a strong emotional reaction from the public and of course sell more papers. Basically, it wasn’t taken seriously by the other nurses, myself included. Amongst the wider community, in Barcelona, things were business as usual. The metro service ran like clockwork with a train arriving every 2-3 minutes, albeit a very cosy encounter. The streets were an ever busy and bustling mix of those commuting to work, tourists and locals trying to navigate through the maze of bodies to their destination. Weeks passed like this with no real ripple in the status quo of the city’s operation. Then came the first reports of the deaths. It would seem that we had all underestimated this “common cold v2” as one of the nurses described. The illness was also appearing to spread faster than ever, news which unnerved me and appeared to shake some of the other staff.

Whispers began to travel the halls that there was a patient who was confirmed to have corona virus in the hospital. It was real. It had arrived.

There appeared to be an either hardy exterior or slightly dismissive attitude from some nurses in the way that a few seemed unphased and continued their work as usual. I was working in the ward of “urgencias de psquiatría” or “psychiatric emergencies” in English. We were therefore somewhat secluded from the rest of the hospital in that we were locked away at a corner of the hospital, some distance from the general wards. This had meant a sheltered experience from the scenes that festered behind other doors. One colleague guided me to deliver some lab results. And there it was. The reality.

Corridors lined with beds. Multiple patients crammed into minuscule rooms. Nurses using paper towels as masks. I was under no impression that this area was solely patients with COVID-19, yet I had a feeling that this was not what some would call a ‘usual’ shift on the general floor. Although some doctors and nurses were dripping with sweat, entranced in an iron strength focus, there was a beauty to the way this machine of many parts was operating. As a mental health student, I have not had much exposure to general wards, which made me wonder if this was ‘another day at the office’, nevertheless the dedication of these healthcare professionals was astounding and inspiring to me.

Towards the end of my time in Barcelona, the effects on the locals and their businesses could be seen. It was as though you didn’t even need to read the news, you could read peoples faces clearer than any article. The Spanish governments decision to enter a lockdown was drawing ever closer (Jones 2020).

I waited 15 minutes for my metro connection to the hospital, and to my surprise, seats were now available on the train; a recommendation was made by the higher powers to reduce the use of public transport. On my walk to the hospital I passed but merely two people; the life of the streets had died an eerie death. Most shops were closed but for a few supermarkets and pharmacies. The real epicentre of city now seemed to be the hospital. As the threat of lockdown lingered, I began to worry about my family back home. Although I had been following the news of what was occurring in Scotland, I could not have a firm grasp in my mind of the severity of the situation without being physically present there. While the worries of my family’s health grew within me and the fear of not being able to return and see them due to the lockdown, so grew the frightening feelings of anxiety; a feeling which I have no doubt has been experienced by many others around the world during this alarming time.

As mentioned earlier, coming from a mental health background I cannot help but ponder its importance throughout this pandemic. It has been said that most of the healthcare professionals that work in isolation units with patients do not receive any training in providing mental health care (Xiang et al. 2020); what does this mean for the future of our society? As the situation develops daily at home, the decision was taken to begin rolling back patient contact in the community and redeploying these nurses to other areas. Although I know that our hands are tied between a lack of resources and following the protocols that are passed down to us by the government, there lies a powerful fear in me that this is the beginning of a long and trying journey. I fear that those patients who are settled in the community are unable to access the support that they need to keep them out of hospital, meaning that they may eventually end up adding to already stretched inpatient services.

Although this reflective piece has been fraught with negative emotions of dread and apprehension, I would like to highlight something which is all too easily overlooked at times like this. The scene which I witnessed on the general floor of that hospital in Barcelona. The silent heroes and heroines that generate hope and put themselves on the frontline without need of validation of recognition. Healthcare professionals give me more hope for the future than most at this time and make me proud to be a mental health nursing student.

Reference List

NHS, 2020. Coronavirus (COVID-19). [online]. London: NHS. Available from: https://www.nhs.uk/conditions/coronavirus-covid-19/ [Accessed 19 March 2020].

JONES, S., 2020. Spain orders nationwide lockdown to battle coronavirus. [online]. London: The Guardian. Available from: https://www.theguardian.com/world/2020/mar/14/spain-government-set-to-order-nationwide-coronavirus-lockdown [Accessed 21 March 2020].

XIANG, Y. et al., 2020. Timely mental health care for the 2019 novel coronavirus outbreak is urgently needed. The Lancet, Psychiatry, 7(3), pp. 228-229.

[ultraericthered]

Anime Update V2 3

Noragami - Yukine’s taking the slow approach in fully establishing himself  at this time, but Yato and Hiyori continue to entertain and at times even intrigue. I love that meeting lord Tenjin and his shrine maidens was how we’re reintroduced to Tomone from the very start of the show, now called Mayu, since you’d expect she just be a bit part character we’d never see again. While the action at the train station and on the tracks was great, the conflict was admittedly a bit forced - like, Yato couldn’t explain his position? He had to go and seem like a cold-hearted asshole going “If they want to die, let them do it and decrease the serplus population!” just to prompt Hiyori to go act on her own? But I guess it did help to make the revelation at the end deeper and more emotionally stirring than it had any right being.

Hunter x Hunter - Got back to comparing and contrasting the two anime...except with two episodes for one, one episode for the other.

1999: For these very early episodes, I think this version was overall better. The 2011 version runs into the same problem as the early parts of Fullmetal Alchemist Brotherhood compared to the 2003 anime where yes, it might be truer to the manga, but the earlier anime version comes off better due to taking its time and giving breathing room for the characters and the events. These episodes were perfect dispays of that - Leorio doesn’t stick with the two boys simply due to hearing that the bus is a trap, he actually gets on the bus and experiences that trap for himself. The jerky hunter has a name and more of a presence, we see the forest route to the settlement, and the quiz challenge is paced out so that it carries all of Act 2. Then in the following episode, the test with the Kiriko in the woods is given more time and mood-setting, and Leorio is once again done a favor by having his part in it shown to us on-screen. While I know for certain that the 2011 anime is the superior show on the whole, I think this anime has it beat in two areas - soundtrack and atmosphere. The 1999 anime has consistently delivered with those.

2011: At first I was put off by them putting both the quiz test and the Kiriko test in the same episode, one test per act, but by the end I did see why that choice was made given the thematic parallels. While I didn’t feel nearly as much tension from the quz compared to the 1999 version (and Leorio comes off even worse here by trying to flat out physically attack the old lady), it was alright and one benefit was Barbara Goodson as the old lady’s voice being superior to the other dub’s voice for her. The second act with the Kiriko was much better and kept the same tone as the original, albeit in a lesser way, and I have to admit that I did not see the twist about the Kiriko family coming, but it made too much sense. But....why do they got wings?

Love Live! Nijigasaki -  Learned here that Setsuna Yuki, real name Nana (but certainly not Talentless Nana!) quit being a school idol ‘cause she felt she was only hurting herself and others in her club by forcing all of her ideas onto the others and stifling their freedom to pursue their own visions. But in trying to hurt no one, Nana just ended up hurting everyone even more, herself included. I figured from the talk she and Yu had in the music room that Yu had her identity figured out, was glad to see it confirmed, and was deligthed by Yu’s heartfelt rooftop pep talk to her filled with fangirly romantic undertones that got Nana to reclaim the Setsuna persona and put on an awesome comeback performance (with an equally awesome song) before the entire school to let them know that the Nijigasaki School Idol club is back in business and we’re just getting started!

Date A Live S3 - This was seriously THE most tense and on edge that I have ever felt watching this show, as more and more of Shido’s dating options got checked off and some of them, even Tohka, were “disappeared” by Natsumi. The part during the date with Kagura where she breaks down in tears over missing and worrying for Yuzuru even caught me off guard and got me a bit choked up. And what is DEM up to in the background? Who is this one guy, who’s his prisoner buddy with the projected voice, what is Westcott planning here? And I thought Kurumi and Miku were evil, but Natsumi really takes the whole cake in terms of unparalleled sadism! Loved seeing Origami work together with the still at risk Spirits and contribute with a new angle, and that Miku played a key part in saving the day. TOTALLY did not guess that Yoshinon, of all characters, was who Natsumi had been impersonating, but looking back, the clues were there. Now Natsumi has been exposed as the petty literal child that she truly is, and as payback, she’s de-aged all the other girls too! 

Fate/Stay Night - Exposition, exposition. That’s the gist of what this episode was all about, just properly explaining what the exact nature of the Holy Grail War is and why the current players are involved in it. But it wasn’t as dull as you’d fear due to not only Rin Tohsaka and Saber being heavily involved, but us getting a proper introduction to the priest who oversees the war, Kirei Kotomine. The dude is just magnetically charismatic and intriguing despite being so obviously the bad guy from the moment he comes in. And while I think Crispin Freeman’s take on him is superior, Jamieson Price is no slouch in the role either (even if his veering into sounding so much like Chris Rager’s Principal Asano voice at points weirds me out). Then at the end, we see Stephanie Sheh’s character from Episode 1 again. She’s part of the war too, and now she’s here looking for a fight!

Revolutionary Girl Utena - Interesting how this episode begins at where the climax would normally be, then backtracks to show us what led to that climax, but then ends without us ever getting back to that climax, which must be saved for the next episode! Unusual, but it works. While Miki (voiced, unfortunately, by the then-inexperienced James Carter Cathcart) and his whole deal with his sister and the piano song came into focus, a good chunk of the episode was spent on an utterly repetitive yet absolutely hilarious study gathering of Miki, Nanami, Utena, and Anthy at the latter’s place, with Nanami losing all semblence of dignity and credibility as her plans to make Anthy look bad keep ending up backfiring in ways that make her the butt of all the animal-related jokes that Anthy had already prepared. And somehow the bad voice acting in the dub just made it funnier. 

Sound! Euphonium S2 - Finally got this season started and after the delay, how fitting that it premiere with a full hour special. Despite the prominence of showing it in stuff like the ED Credits, Kumiko, Hazuki, Sapphire, and Reina as a foursome was not a thing in the first season, so I was glad to see that now that Kumiko and Reina are dating taking part in early morning practice sessions together, they get to hang in the club with the other two girls as friends more often. Oh, and maybe I shouldn’t have watched Liz and the Blue Bird prior to this season because we get the actual debut of Mizore Yoroizuka, Nozomi Kasaki, and Mr. Hashimoto here. Turns out that Nozomi played a large part in the band’s fracturing about a year ago that was discussed in Season 1, and now that the band is actually going somewhere, she feels a little entitled to re-joining, despite Asuka giving repeated firm rejections. Mizore clearly knows what’s up, to the point of getting upset and “feeling sick” just by hearing Nozomi playing her flute from a distance. It’s a complex situation that Kumiko and Reina discuss more on a festival night, but all of it ceases to matter when we get the beautiful gay fireworks moment.

MAR - OK, I got what the episode was going for, but for most of it I was not very engaged, as once again it’s retreading familiar ground of dime-a-dozen stories. Jack’s got to learn to “become a man” and stand up to some big bullies who are making he and his mother’s lives worse. Nothing new or interesting is being said there. Also taking me out of it was that I could swear that Beau Billingslea and Richard Epcar swapped which of the werewolf brothers they were voicing at some points. Ginta and Babbo, who had the weak, predictable conflict last time, were actually the best part of this one, and the scene with Jack (voiced by post-puberty Bryce Papenbrook) and his mother towards the end was actually effectively moving at getting the actual heart across. Oh yeah, and it ends with a sudden cut to a creepy looking ghoulish fellow voiced very recognizably by Kyle Hebert putting a hit out on Ginta and Babbo. Interesting?

AMC: Bakugan Battle Brawlers - Was also not feeling this episode very much, as aside from some amusing childish bickering and banter between Dan and Runo that started and bookended it, almost the entriety of it was spent on a fuck-out-of-nowhere tag-team brawl against two magician brothers who work for Masquerade for no given motivation (and Masquerade’s not anywhere IN the episode, either!), filled with some forced “can they work well together?” conflict for Dan and Runo, and some legit cringe-inducing dialogue from the dub script. Like, whoever put these dumb lines in there should never write for kids shows again. Also, one of the magicians sounded just like the old, annoying kid voice Andrew Rannells used to do for 4Kids. But hey, maybe it was worth sitting through just to get to the next episode preview at the very end, given to us by Runo and literally ending with her going “Oh look! Giraffes!” OK, THAT got a laugh.

AND

[TITLE REDACTED] - Well....uh, I’ve now learned what a touchy, complicated subject love can be. Like, if one feels a romantic stirring in their heart and a sexuality-based attraction to another, is that really “love”? Sometimes that sort of thing can lead to rejection from the other party involved, or worse if it’s not rebuffed but embraced, that embrace can be toxic and unhealthy on one or both ends at most, can lead to horrific sexual abuse at worst. And if someone falls in love with someone that they by all means oughtn’t, is that love somehow inherently wrong? Even if the lover does not act on any sexual urges, treats their loved one well, and shares co-dependency with them? Even if the feelings are pure and true, albeit not entirely mutual? Sometimes, one just cannot tell apart familial love from romantic love, as they grew up lacking in the former and it left them with no frame of reference for it or the latter. This person might know well the hearts of others, but their understanding of their own heart is just so skewed and twisted that it makes their judgment not entirely reliable. Guess that’s just how it is. We all live, love, and live to love.

Yeah, I’m leaving it up to y’all to figure out what the actual Hell I’m even talking about here. All I have left to say is that I thought that ending to Episode 1 of The Promised Neverland was a nightmare, but THIS...this was just....*INTERNAL SCREAMING*