#who kinda inserted herself into the role but hey whatever

[stillgirlfrommars]

you’ve got news

So, I already talked about this with @missmorwen​ and I know I don’t have the time to draw and make an actual comic out of it, BUT I cannot stop thinking about this SamSteve-post-engdame-fix-it story (with a dash of BuckyNat, ‘cause that’s just who I am) which is kinda crack and very rom-com (a bit you’ve got mail) inspired and doesn't make much sense, because... PLOT HOLES but * sigh * I kinda wanna share at least the idea so - bear with me:

So, instead of Nat dying, Steve sacrifices his Captain America powers on Vormir and comes back as Skinny!Steve and starts running a political blog called you’ve-got-news in secret, uncovering all kinds of shady business/corruption and becoming the bane of existence of every politician and greedy CEO - but it takes a while for his friends to figure out it's him who’s running that increasingly popular blog (which the new Captain America is actually a big fan of ;)). And the way that happens is as follows:

So, Steve almost died at the end of Endgame. The idiot (affectionate) of course still wanted to fight Thanos, but even with Thor’s Hammer, he took some serious, serious injuries which led to a tough talk with Sam, Nat and Bucky

Like I imagine, that while Steve would not have any regrets whatsoever about giving up his powers, he would still need some time to come to terms with the fact that he won’t be able to participate in the action like he used to. Even though, he actually wants and knows... it’s time to ... start something new, it’s still a process. So, there he is, trying to figure out who he is without the mantle of Captain America, re-defining the way he can and will fight against bullies in the future (cause there is no way he’s gonna stop that).

And to the surprise of everyone, Steve actually doesn’t press for participating in Avenger-style-fights anymore (he still does some of the practical mission planning and shit like that) but most importantly, he starts taking up new hobbies, like cooking or old hobbies like drawing - and he seems happier than he has in a long time, and yeah maybe it’s a bit too good to be true, if Sam starts thinking about it. But, hey, Steve finally seems to be happy so -

Meanwhile, Sam still becomes the new Captain America, and Steve is there while he is adjusting, finding himself in that role. He is there when Sam needs to talk things through, and yeah, it would still be a process like in tfatws series, but ... a little bit less alone, I guess. 

So, the new Captain America fights alongside Nat and Bucky - and it’s good, they work surprisingly well together, but also: those two are stuck right in the middle of a weird assassin!flirting situation (I’m imagening a lot of veeery intense staring at the other while cleaning their weapons or beating someone up, innuendos en masse, dark humour etc.). And frankly, it’s getting on Sam's nerves because they seem to be so oblivious about the whole damn thing. Neither of them is actually admitting to anything, no, they are too busy teasing him about the ‘crush’ he has developed on that mysterious dude who is running the famous political-youve-got-news-blog that gained momentum a while ago and is currently keeping all the corrupt politicians and CEOs on their toes.

So, yeah, Sam might have been caught a couple of times reading or reciting from that blog because - it has actually turned into a pretty efficient way of mobilising people to demonstrate for change and it did give him some tip-offs in regards to who the bad guy really was and yeah. But it’s not a crush... Sam just really likes reading the blog posts, okay. That dude seems pretty cool and they share the same moral code, so... whatever.

What Nat and Bucky and Steve don't know (and he’ll never tell them), is that Sam is actually kiiiiinda already frequently talking with the guy who runs the blog. Anonymously on both ends, of course (because for good reasons both of them are pretty careful about giving away information concerning their identities). And in a way that whole anonymity-thing makes it a lot easier to talk about stuff he finds harder to admit to the people who he knows directly. So, you could say, blog-guy has kinda become Sam's internet friend, but not his crush, no.

Honestly, the crush he is more concerned about (that he also isn't planning on telling anyone about any time soon, cause Bucky would just tease him and Nat would start scheming) is, well, it’s Steve. Because, damn, he likes their get-togethers a lot, the meals Steve's cooking are honestly to die for. They watch baseball together, they do museum-trips... And the way they can talk about (almost) everything... He just feels understood and... yeah, loved (maybe not in the way that he wishes for, but still) and it’s nice to see Steve so happy and okay, maybe it’s getting a bit out of control because Sam took Steve with him to visit Sarah and his nephews and Sarah kinda saw right through his act of ‘hey, this is my best friend’ and ‘what do you mean, I don’t have feelings- okay. Yeah maybe I do’ and told him in no uncertain terms to fucking do something about it and get his shit together.

The thing is, he’s got it bad. But Sam is also torn, because this is the best fucking friendship he's ever had and he does not want to jeopardise that. So, in the end he ends up talking about this with his Internet friend... about how he kinda has this huge crush on his best friend, and his Internet friend is like, ‘TELL ME ABOUT IT, big fucking same here UGH. And I feel like I’m being SO obvious about it all. It’s honestly embarrassing. My other best friend keeps teasing me ‘bout it and tells me to just go for it, but that guy still hasn’t managed to ask out the girl he’s interested in, so, what does he know, right?’. And Sam laughs - at least he’s not alone.

So the days go by (Sam’s pining only increases, Steve took him to a wine tasting the other night and he almost... in his drunk state... almost... but he didn’t) until one day, while blog-guy and Sam are chatting, all of the sudden the blog-guy is like, ‘Shit, I think someone's breaking into my apartment’ and then like, ‘Okay, yes they are’ - and Sam's like, ‘call 911′, and blog-guy writes back ‘mmh think I can handle them’ (and Sam’s like ‘WTF... I know way too many people with zero regards for their own well-being, myself included’)

But then blog-guy is not answering anymore, so Sam frantically calls up Nat who rushes to his flat and Sam says: ‘You need to find out where that IP adress is located ASAP - the dude with that famous blog is in danger.’

And Nat does that multitasking thing where she’s working on the problem while ribbing Sam about the fact that, apparently, Captain America's Internet bestie is that famous blog dude, and- 'Are you sure it’s not a crush?'

But after another minute, Nat sighs and is like, ‘I can't find the location, this thing is encrypted af, it’s impossible.’ Suddenly, she notices something about the setup of the encryption and-, ‘Hang on a second, it was me who set this up for someone back in 2011.′ And as she slips on her jacket, she says to Sam, ‘Come on. I know where we have to go!’

So they make their way to what turns out is Steve's (!!!!) apartment and find him in the middle of a fight against over half a dozen heavily armed people, and yeah - he’s actually doing pretty okay for himself ‘cause he outsmarted a couple of them, but also- they kind of outnumber him, so Nat and Sam get to work.

And Sam doesn't even have time to fully register what that means re:blog-guy until they have successfully defeated the bad guys. After that's done, Steve is like, ‘Thanks guys, but how the hell did you know I was in trouble? Nat... you didn’t bug my apartment, did you??’

And Nat tstsk and then she just laughs because this is priceless and OF CoURSE it is Steve who is behind that blog... (she's a bit mad at herself for not figuring it out sooner, and a bit sad that Steve didn't feel like he could tell her, and that he assumes she has is flat bugged but, also,... kinda impressed.) But then she looks at him with a warm smile on her face, shaking her head, saying, ‘No, I didn’t, Steve.’ Her gaze wanders back and forth between Steve and Sam and she humms- 'That actually makes so much sense oh my god.' So, she leaves them ‘to talk’ ;) and for Sam to explain everything’ - and then it’s just the two of them.

And Sam does explain everything and is like, 'So you're that Blog dude, erm...' He's scratching the back of his neck, cheeks flushed, 'Turns out, we've been talking for months over that blog of yours. I'm (insert-Sam’s-username-here).'- and Steve's eyes go wide and you can literally see him processing that information right then and there and he's sputtering out a light laugh, and he's like 'Hang on a second... I... umm, okay, I gotta ask. So, that best friend you've got a crush on...' Well, it’s now or never -'Is you, yeah..', Sam admits and starts, 'and....' They both laugh again and Steve nods and just says- 'yeah, it’s you, too.'

And then they kiss and yaaay, happy ending!!!

And then the epilogue would be about them having a nice dinner with Bucky and Nat a couple of months later, and the whole time, Sam and Steve are being very much in loveTM. The three guys are standing in the kitchen, while Natasha is in the bathroom and Bucky's making a funny quib about how sickeningly cute Sam and Steve are together - and Sam, well, Sam just raises his eyebrows and is like, 'You know what, you're not allowed to say anything bout that, you and Romanoff have been acting waaaaay worse over the last year. At least we got our shit together in the end, what's your excuse, you are obviously absolutely in love with her!', and of course Nat chooses that exact moment to enter the room, hand on Bucky's waist, dropping a kiss on his cheek and is like, 'What do you mean, we've been dating for 6 months?' And Steve laughs and Sam groans bc .... he loves his friends, he does, but clearly, CLEARLY they ALL have to work on their communication skills!

The End.

[antidotenurse]

If you had the chance to rewrite zexal what would you change abt it and what you you put more focus on?

😳 Okay well… Let’s see. I’m no writer. And admittedly, I’m not as versed in episode citing as much as other people I know. I’m just that person who, after watching something else, will come back to zexal and look at it wondering: “Why is literally nothing happening ever?” So bear in mind my lack of tact and proper vocabulary. 

I’d probably keep it more or less the same… but with a couple shifts here and there. More indulgent stuff on my end is having the Numbers Club y’know, actually DO things. And it’d be nice to have Astral and Yuma have a slight falling out and work build up trust again post-sargasso before he dies.

Most of what my brain jumps to when it comes to “stuff in zexal i’d wanna full on rewrite” revolves almost primarily around Rio and Nasch stuff since I don’t really like it’s execution in the first place. …And Tori. But Tori might likely have to be a separate discussion altogether. So, I guess I’m trying to make a more semi-realistic scenario within certain boundaries? Ex. No adding other episodes, and if something is taken away something new must be added in. And aside from one duel, duels will remain the same. 

FIRST AND FOREMOST: Rio is not killed off for a second time once she wakes up. Her being in a coma fundamentally doesn’t change her role at all as a person giving out “premonitions” whatsoever. It’s actually kind of insane. I’m not gonna go through everything just major moments. A lot and also very little goes on within episodes, I’ll just rely folk can fill in the blanks.

So for some mindfulness, from Abyss onwards, Rio is here.

SHARK VS. ABYSS and then some follow up:

Originally, this set of episodes involved Rio being possessed, and Shark fights Abyss and from there we learn about the Nasch and Merag stuff. Mostly the latter but for some reason focus is on Shark. Rio is then promptly put into a coma again and Shark wangst happens from here on out until the face-heel turn during the Astral World arc.

I’d probably make it start with… Idk. I feel like the original beginning of the episode works fine since it begins with visions being had by Rio. Blah blah, she’s confused, time to find another number. It’s in a weird spot in the middle of the ocean. For whatever reason, this area in the ocean feels really distressing for her. But, regardless, instead of a storm hitting and Rio suddenly going “missing”— as the crew tries deciphering the location, her “powers” take over and cursed by something unknown she jumps from the airship into the sea, followed by Shark who dives in after her (and yuma dives in after shark). Very dumb but the episode must start somehow. And this is likely played more seriously but I can’t help but laugh a bit at the thought.

Shark awakes in an undersea labyrinth, and somehow isn’t dead. Wtf? But hey! He found Rio nearby and she’s okay! The goal is finding the number tho, and her “powers” lead them to it. And uh oh here we go. A guardian is here to keep them from taking it. (As for Yuma, he and Astral’s sideplot about getting lost in the labyrinth is exactly the same, so dw about this)

The duel??? I said I wouldn’t change most, but this is a major exception. I’m making it Shark and Rio VS. Abyss. A two on one duel. We never once saw Rio and Shark play off each other in a duel setting when working together, and I feel like that was a prime missed opportunity. Especially for characters who just episodes prior, had this really weird one v. one duel. This needs something of a resolution. ALSO The memories here do involve both of them, so let both of them go ham.

However, since the memory flashbacks tend to tie into Merag a liiiittle more already (and the more major Nasch stuff will come later), Rio should be the first person to experience the Barian memories out of the two of them. We already got a bit of that with her visions at the start. As the duel progresses, Rio becomes more distressed by what she’s experiencing. During the duel Rio has lots of out of body experiences, on the one hand she’s present in the duel. On the other hand, she slips back into living life as Priestess Merag. But, for some reason, he doesn’t have a lot of control of herself?

But obviously, what Rio remembers is far worse since she pretty much relives her own death and can’t control her “mind.”

Meanwhile, Shark also goes through his vision onslaught, clearly thinking majority of this is some kind of manipulation tactic by Abyss. Episode more or less plays out the same minus damsel stuff. Durbe confronting Yuma and Astral still happens, Abyss being cryptic as hell still occurs and you know. Anyway, they win and get the number, and they all reappear on the deck of the airship knocked out. Everyone wakes up, it feels like a dream but they have the number?? So it couldn’t be?? Rio wakes up last though, which momentarily scares Shark.

TIME FOR REFLECTION!! Rio is fine, but clearly shaken. All those visions she saw… they meant something. Something inside her is telling her that. While Shark too is distraught and stressed by what he experienced during the duel… he doesn’t come to grips at all with it. He’s in more overt denial. In fact, he’s furious. Their lives weren’t lies?! How can she even THINK that? NONE of that was real! Also, wtf why the fuck did she jump into the ocean?! She could’ve died! Shark is emotionally overwhelmed both in potentially losing his sister again, and also the whole barian thing.

Rio isn’t on board either, but she’s always been the more “open” of the two. She’s not down for Shark’s behavior in the slightest, nor his seeming lack of empathy. Y’know? That more abrasive denial thing from Shark that feels a bit more in-line than just moping about a dead sister. Also, she literally relived dying so like. Fuck man that whole lack of empathy thing isn’t cool to her.

P.S Rio isn’t saying they’re Barians, but, maybe it’s her powers of “foresight” getting to her… something about what she saw feels too real to ignore, while the A plot goes on, she’s processing that very real possibility. This starts to cause something of a rift between otherwise close siblings.

Durbe proceeds to use this to his advantage.

[Next episodes: astral dies. Those episodes play out exactly the same except now Rio is part of the peanut gallery. The fearsome four stuff begins]

SHARK AND THOMAS VS. JELLYFISH MAN

Ok we know what happens in the original. Sort of. I’ll be honest? Haven’t seen these eps in a while. But, Shark goes to his old mansion to relive childhood memories, meanwhile coma Rio is poisoned by jelly man, and Shark also gets poisoned too. IV shows up dadada he’s sorry about the Rio thing but he never speaks to her. Things are gettin’ crazy. Something to that effect, I probably went out of order.

I think what I’d do is have Shark and Rio get into a fight about the barian stuff. Or something that really exemplifies the rift between that’s grown between them since Abyss. Either way, it leads to Shark leaving to the one place he feels he can really think — their old childhood home.

(Also Blah blah plot about strings of poisonings fucking people up is going on in the background that Yuma, Trey and Tori are focused on. Why not the numbers club?? Idk you tell me. Real zexal won’t allow that.)

Rio, in the meantime, after reflecting on what was said and done- goes to find Shark. And she knows exactly where he’d go. (Yuma, III, and Tori are present when she does this so they pursue her shortly thereafter. This is to replace the moments in the hospital)

P.S Durbe is watching all of this happen.

Shark reminisces at the mansion, and is promptly attacked by a monster and poisoned. IV shows up how he does originally and yadada duel starts.

Halfway through Rio and co. Find shark and IV dueling jellyfish man. Rio recognizes her bro is hurt, but Shark is not down for Rio or anybody else tagging in for any reason. There’s an interruptive conflict that’s super awkward for everyone involved (so maybe levity from jellyfish or IV can be put here) Yuma and co. show up at the tail end of this brief exchange.

And Rio, still riled up despite attempting to reach out, retreats into the mansion. The duel outside continues, but inside is where she encounters Durbe.

Ideally a moment would be had between Rio and Durbe similarly to a scene in a later episode with Shark and Durbe, but for the most part this will be small and not seen in full. But Durbe holds out Merag’s crest to Rio and he likely says some cryptic anime nonsense about “destiny” or something.

Because she’s been sensing “it” since the Abyss duel, and he firmly believes that she’s known the truth for a lot longer than she wants to admit.

We don’t see Rio again until the duel ends and she’s found inside the mansion. She seems, at “peace” for some reason? Something about her feels… different. Durbe is nowhere to be seen.

Insert moment here where IV and Rio actually, y’know. TALK. But things are kinda too late-ish now… cuz Rio has somebody else to deal with next.

[astral world arc begins]

Aight, while Yuma is off in Astral world dueling Eliphas and saving Astral, Durbe finally puts his final phase into motion to FINALLY convince Shark to accept who he actually is. Something he’s been fighting for a while now. And surprisingly, Rio is helping Durbe, much to Shark’s shock.

Shark at this point had been in his anguish full of regret for being pretty bitchy lately. All the fights, this barian stuff, the confusion, the fact it’s like he doesn’t even KNOW his sister anymore (and this Shark very likely doesn’t), it’s overwhelming as fuck and he’s tired.

Episode plays out normally with Durbe making Shark relive his life during his last encounter with Vector, the Iris thing, the men dying blah blah. That episode is kind of awesome to begin with, so borderline nothing changes here.

The the difference mostly being that the setup is a bit more concrete. Instead of Rio kinda just, being dead and a spirit “guide” to help Shark’s wangst and immediately following his face-heel turn with no insight on how she felt, we’ve been experiencing how she feels for a while and been seeing how it affects her and Shark’s relationship for a while.

It’s eventually mentioned that Durbe showed Rio these memories back at the mansion. Because showing somebody their twins terrible life after you died definitely isn’t horrifying!! Anyway, Rio came to accept the truth… because, like Durbe said before, she’s “always” known.

HOW? Because it turns out Rio’s powers of foresight she’s been experiencing throughout the series were her memories of being Merag trying really really hard to get out this whole time. That’s why she acts differently in those sudden moments. That’s how Rio knows these she couldn’t possibly know.

Rio being present as a “spirit” is there to help guide Shark through this experience, because he’s always been doing things alone for her. Time she returned the favor.

Everything plays out pretty much exactly the same, after all that anguish and reliving trauma where his army dies and Iris dies- Shark FINALLY accepts the truth about himself being Nasch. He and Rio switch sides together (because they weren’t going to do it alone).

Nasch and Merag take their spots in Barian World, and stuff proceeds to play out as normal. Sort of.

None of this is really all that great, but it’s a start? Again, I’m not a writer and a lot of this would realistically be overshadowed by the scheduled duels that play out, the A plot with Yuma, and generally be a lot more condensed due to the limited amount of episodes left. All this to say that there’s more ways than “dead sister” to make something happen. I dunno these are all minor shifts and my vocabulary is hyperbolic. 

[furry-emblem]

You know what, after talking about how biases and stuff mess with 3H discourse, I'm going to go over my biases and personal experiences with each major faction leader because I feel like it. I don’t really want people arguing with me on these, but I would like to hear other people describing their experiences with these characters because that’s always interesting to read about. I'm listing the characters in order of how much I liked them.

Byleth

Also known as erotica, keyboard smash, Sothis, another keyboard smash, BoobBoob, and Boobama. I really dislike them. I’ve never been particularly fond of silent or self-insert protagonists. At best, they signal to me that the game isn’t going to bother with its story or character writing (and that’s fine when that’s the case), while at worst, it’s the writers taking the most important character in the story and then throwing their hands up and saying “we don’t need to write this one.” Byleth feels like the ladder and it’s to the detriment of pretty much everyone around them. Like, even considering that silent protagonists are supposed to be characters that the player projects onto, Byleth doesn’t do a good job at this because there’s enough canonical descriptions of them that you can’t really roleplay, but there’s so little going on that they don’t stand on their own two feet. So it’s like having a piece of cardboard dictate the fate of the country. They also primarily function as a wall for characters to exposition dump their backstories onto, which isn’t very interesting to watch. Like, 3H would have been better off without Byleth in it. 0/10.

Rhea

I just haven't had the chance to see a lot of her stuff, so I think I'm missing some of the stuff that makes people like her (and I'd prefer to not have that spoiled for me). Haven't seen her supports or the Church Route, but she just hasn't left me with a good impression. I don't like how possessive she gets of Byleth. Like, it creeps me out a little. I'm also a bit disappointed that you never get to play as her. I want the pope to bitch slap people (except not my people). I remember her being an antagonist in CF felt kind of forced to me when I first played because her reactions felt a bit silly. The problem wasn't whether they were justified or not, the problem was lack of context given and the fact that she was saying stuff like "You will BURN in the PITS OF HELL" while standing perfectly still and making this face >:(. And I just couldn't take that seriously for whatever reason because it felt cheesy and I didn't really understand what was going on. It also soured any endearment Rhea showed towards Byleth to me on future routes because her actions in CF gave me the impression of her being obsessive and controlling of Byleth. Like, she acted entitled to their loyalty, expected them to be something they never asked for, and flipped the fuck out when they rejected. It reminded me a lot of some abuse I've gone through and it made me dislike the character. Now that I have more context on the character, I get why she reacted so suddenly and violently because CF kinda threw all of her triggers at her. It feels like she dug her grave in that route, but she dug it in a way that resembles a Greek Tragedy more than anything else. My second route was Claude's route, which thoroughly disappointed me in terms of its writing. When Rhea was exposition dumping her backstory, I was like "I'm boooored," so that really didn't help my opinion of the character. I also don't really like how she gets damsels in three out of four routes. I still don't actively like the character very much because she left a really sour taste in my mouth, but I understand that I'm missing information and that there are reasons to like her. I'm open to learning more about her, but she just really rubs me the wrong way.

Yuri

I never finished Cindered Shadows and I have no real opinion on Yuri. I thought he was a girl when I first saw him and I think he's fun to play as in gameplay, so I guess there's that. I don't really see myself replaying Cindered Shadows if I even finish it because it lacks a lot of the major things I liked from 3H.

Seteth

Does he even get to count? Like, he's not in charge and Rhea should've probably been the leader of Silver Snow. Haven't played that route yet. I like Seteth. He's got good dad energy and also he's my wife (specifically in Verdent Wind). He's got good vibes. Also, if you kill Flayn in Crimson Flower, his English voice acting when he's like "Flayn Noooo" gets to me. I still really like Seteth. A solid 8/10 for me.

Dmitri

I wasn't following Three Houses advertising at all, so I didn't know anything about anyone going in. I was originally just going to skip him entirely because he looked boring and had shitty hair. So I did his route last. Partially out if curiosity for the character, partially because I might as well do every major route since I'd already done Claude and Edelgard, partially to get to know some of the Blue Lions, and partially because some of Edelgard's backstory is only revealed in this route and I was curious about that. Dmitri's route definitely has the best writing out of any of the routes. I really like how personal the route is and how much it focuses on how one specific event impacted all of the characters in it. There are some big problems I have with the route and Dmitri, like how the game uses psychosis to represent Dmitri being murdery and how him changing his mind felt more like Byleth's decision than his own due to their conversation being pretty bad. But overall, he has the best writing. I'd strongly recommend playing through his route if you haven't just because the writing's rather good there. The reason why he's ranked below Claude and Edelgard, however, is pretty simple: I just don't vibe with him. Like, the hero archetype bores the hell out of me, even when it is subverted like it is here. I also just didn't relate to the character on really any level while I did with Claude and Edelgard. The amount of Edelgard slander in his name also annoys me, but I don't think it really impacts how much I like Dmitri. He's a well written character that I just don't vibe with. I also remember his death in Verdant Wind and being like “wtf was that??” Like, the writers killed him offscreen.. twice. In the same route.

Claude 

I really enjoyed Claude as a character. He left a good first impression on me and I almost picked him for my first playthrough because he’s hot and sassy. Two good traits for any character. I ended up picking Edelgard, though, and he left a good impression on me during CF. I like that he held the alliance together and had a contingency plan for if he lost that battle. When I played his route, I ended up going Hard Mode NG+ Casual and I stuck everyone on a dragon. I did find it funny that throughout the school phase, Claude learns bow stuff repeatedly, then in one of the last months, he went up to me and was like “hey, can you start teaching me in axe and flying?” Which he had nothing in either. Then timeskip happens and he comes waltzing in on a dragon. Claude is where all the good memes in the fandom go. That said, I really disliked his route because Claude felt like an afterthought in it (because he literally was). I don’t like that I got out of the route and it felt like I didn’t know as much more about the character going out than I did going in. Some of that is because I didn’t see a ton of his supports, which is where pretty much all of the character work is. I like how Claude is open minded and actively tries to seek out the truth. So, overall, I found his route a bit disappoint but I still really like him because he’s a fun character.

Edelgard

I fucking love Edelgard. She was my first pick and therefore the character that introduced me to the game, and by extension, the series of Fire Emblem. I picked her because she’s pretty, she looked ready to fistfight god from the word go, and she seemed like the mascot of the game so I figured the writers might put a bit extra effort into her route (they didn’t, rip). My very first playthrough was actually a Normal/Classic run, but I had to abandon the run because literally everyone died four hours into the save (I swapped to Normal/Casual). Edelgard ended up carrying me through my first playthrough. I stuck her on a dragon and she killed literally everyone and everything. In my most recent playthrough of the game, I did CF and made her an archer mage dancer for the memes and that was also a ton of fun to play with. Her gameplay feel had a role in me liking her (like, Dmitri is also very powerful, but it was my third playthrough and I knew what I was doing better by then, so him being just as OP as Edelgard didn’t really influence my opinion on him as much as it did her). 

Besides the gameplay, Edelgard’s probably the major character that I relate to the most. Every character on this list (except maybe Byleth or Yuri, I know literally nothing about Yuri tho) has experience with trauma and is coping with it in some way. Edelgard copes by villainizing herself and shutting off her emotions, but despite that, she’s still a low-empathy person who’s still very compassionate person who cares about others and is trying to do the right thing. She also generally tries to express some amount of compassion to her enemies, even if it’s little more than saying “it sucks that Dmitri had to die.” She’s not as open-minded or as truth-seeking as Claude is, but she still tries to keep herself open to other viewpoints and will readily accept any she deems as valid at a moment’s notice. I just really like that about her because I share a lot of those traits in common with her. I also like the idea of her being someone who’s willing to do evil things to bring good to the world. That’s not something you normally get in a protagonist and I think that’s a cool idea. 

I still found her route to be very awkward, especially with no context. Like, I missed the line where Edelgard’s like “yeah, btw, I’m the Flame Emperor,” so I was just wondering what happened there. It’s an anticlimactic way to end the main plot of the first half of the game. I also didn’t really get Rhea’s angle at all. So the route just felt a lot like “I guess I’m doing this now??” In other routes, I found her deaths to be very hard hitting. The death in Verdant Wind only really got me because I really liked Edelgard and she was my original student and I could feel how much she wanted to make her future a reality and how her failing meant all of those sacrifices she made and the evils she’d done would now all be for nothing. I get that impression with Azure Moon’s ending too. 

Most of my appreciation for the character does come from her support conversations. I like how her chain with Bernie has her trying to learn how to not scare her off. Her interactions with Dorothea in their support chain are kind of sad because Dorothea is trying to show her admiration and love for Edelgard in a way that makes sense to her but then Edelgard’s low view of herself causes her to reject the offer. I really liked her Manuela support too (haven’t seen Hanneman’s but I’ve heard that it’s good). I like how with Manuela, Edelgard learns why people are religious and she that being religious doesn’t make you weak. I like her Linhart support where he calls her out for trying to dictate his life and she responds by trying to overhaul some of her own systems and assumptions about him, which leads to her giving him a role to the empire that also properly accommodates for his needs. I like how with Ferdinand’s supports, he has to learn to let go of their rivalry, but once that does happen, Edelgard takes into account his ideas and roles with them. I think it’s funny that she and Hubert flirt with each other by sending each other credible death threats. Edelgard just has a lot of very good supports. Don’t get me wrong, Claude and Dmitri also have supports that are good (I thought Claude’s support chain with Petra was cute and I really like Dmitri’s support chain with Flayn), but Edelgard’s supports go a long way to paint her as someone who is flawed but still really admirable.

Edelgard is definitely one of my favorite fictional characters, and I’d love to see more characters like her in the future.

[otakumagicmusicgamer]

Spoilers Ahead for the first season of My Next Life As A Villianess <3

Oh where to begin. First of all, when the summary said it was a comedy of misunderstandings, I got scared. I have really bad second hand embarrassment and it’s a very fine line of Dense Misunderstandings For Comedy and A Cringefest of Pain For “Comedy” (even playing an anxiety spiral itself for laughs). But oh! How I was happily surprised! It really goes with the flow and doesn’t rely on ridicule or anything. There’s just Catarina, dense weird wonderful Catarina, and everyone in some fashion accepts her for her. So this is actually pleasant to watch!

Now, Catarina- what a delight. What makes her interesting is she takes Fortune Lover Catarina and humbles her. Takes selfish and mean and spins it 180. If she puts out mean into the world, it comes back at her in the end. She knows she has the potential for a ‘scary face’ and actively chooses not to use it. And her feelings on the matter are not just for survival, theyre genuine too. But what makes this fascinating is her lack of accounting for things *not* in the game. She doesn’t consider, by blazing a new path in the game -where Catarina is nice- that new ‘routes’ form. She focuses on Maria’s pov so much, she doesn’t see her own. She doesn’t see the good she’s put out, cuz she’s supposed to be the antagonist. She’s so focused on the doom flags, she doesn’t realize there *are* no doom flags. There’s nothing for the game to doom, no punishment for cruelty. What’s more, even by taking the place of ‘The Suitors’ in scenes with Maria, she doesn’t consider /any of them/ having feelings for her. (Geordo kisses her neck for crying out loud.) Why? Because Catarina Claes is not a romanceable character in Fortune Lover. There are a lot of paths, but she is not one of them. She has no successful romantic relationship, nor any. Which makes this whole anime downright Fascinating. By taking out the antagonist, there is no doom. By inserting a reborn earnest friendly kind tree-climbing high school girl in her place, there is no Fortune Lover. The fact that she is aware of Fortune Lover makes her almost omnipresent, and putting all her points into Survival and Durability and Craves Sweets and nothing else, makes her human. No high marks, denser than bricks, but damn if she ain’t the prettiest embodiment of a Nokia phone. She’d be an apocalypse survivor. “How did she survive a landslide in a volcano? Idk it’s Catarina.” Oh, and the last scene? The friendship ending? Yeah, she’s not wrong. It is a friendship ending.... for Maria. She ends up with none of the interests and stays good friends with them, no bad blood or nothing. Cuz again, Catarina isn’t a love interest. It just so happens that the entire company present in the area is so fucking in love with her that they say the Line Of Romance to her and, while they may bicker, they do not hold bad feelings for each other. If all of them could be married to Catarina and live in a big ol house together, they’d be so fuckin content. And best part? None of this is condemned. No “ya gotta pick one and only one”. They saw a harem and went ‘ya know? Let’s embrace this’ and now the characters r so chill with their plant growing, tree climbing gf. (I’m sure her mother wishes *something* good could rub off on Catarina lol) You hear that? That’s the sound of a Polyamorous nerd feeling validated. (It’s me, I feel validated by this Polyamorous romcom anime, this is my home now)

My thoughts on the rest of the cast aren’t going to be as long. The anime does a good job of going through each characters thoughts and arcs. And I adored Anne’s POV on things as well, how she is also moved to tears by Catarina’s good heart. Even her mother, who is harsh but only because she cares. (I would have loved to see the look on her mother’s face when she was in the coma, how she would have grieved, what she would have reflected on. Her father is a bit more transparent in emotions, but he would have been great to see too). I also would have loved to see Mary and Maria in the book of desire. I figure Maria would kinda be like Alan, but oh, what would Mary have done? (Guess I need fanfiction to answer that lol.) Keith’s role as a love interest for Catarina is the only least liked thing I have on here. And honestly it’s cuz they keep *calling* them brother and sister. I know they’re not actually siblings, mostly that’s left over from Fortune Lover, and “distant relative” can and is shorthand for a lot of things so like it’s even possible they aren’t related at all. And the characters don’t find it horrible that he loves her, and probably know he’s a Distant Relative so they’re like whatevs. So like, it’s not incest. It’s not even as potently close to incest as anime can get. But it’s the only thing that could be deemed a Flaw about this anime, so it stands out. I do wish the ending couple of eps could have been a little more Maria, and her having a bit more importance in general. Also her light magic having an effect a bit in the ‘fight’ with Sirius. Although I do want to think the green glow of hope was Maria, tho I’m pretty sure the assumption is Acchan.

Which btw can I say was an absolute treat? I suspected something was up with Sirius but I did not suspect that. I wonder what his base magic is, if it isn’t dark magic? I had thought he saved Sophia and Catarina and thus also had wind/light magic. But oh man, when he started lashing out on Catarina cuz he thought she was also faking kindness? That she was purposely saving people? That a part of his resentment of nobles was being projected? That somewhere he also caught Feelings and thus the mage doubled down on his control? That when Catarina looked at Sirius and touched his hand and face, her (Nerd™️) instincts kicked in and pieced everything together and also saw him in such pain and misery? That she holds herself to the antagonist title, that she’s there to ruin and thus can’t *save* anyone, (a bittersweet sentiment) so she’s not intimidated by the burst of dark magic and just honestly wants his friendship and sit with him through his pain? MY HEART! IT SCREAMS! (I love this sort of dynamic yes Ive loved Fruits Basket for years don’t look at me like that).

What else.... the little peppering in the fact that Oh Yeah She’s Dead hit like a truck. The little bit with her family, of her past life? Yeah, ouch. Got me crying. Don’t think to much into that rabbit hole, you’ll get sad. I fucking ADORE the twist of Sophia being Acchan, or at least part of her. Her being so scared of loosing her best friend (and love of her life) again? Yeah, tears man. Catarina accidentally mending the relationships between Geordo and Alan and Maria and her mother was great. Having Mary and Sophia dance with Catarina at her birthday party was a delightful touch, as was not having all the romance novels be m/f, and none of it was a joke or negatively placed- just *there*. I do enjoy the interests butting heads with each other over private time with Catarina. It was mostly Geordo and Keith (“they’re such good friends” girl if they had a tenth of lil Alan’s Fight Me energy you’d have to put them on leashes) but I loved the little bits of Geordo vs Mary and Sophia cheering on Nicol and I reeeeally hope to see more of that. To provoke subtle sass from Alan and Maria would be a great sight, and more of Raphael joining the ranks. I laugh at all the times they mutter “gotta protect her, she’s seduced another one” cuz like, girl ain’t doing shit but running into people that happen to be Moron-sexual, holding their hand and refusing to leave. And they KNOW that. And it’s great. edit: HOW COULD I FORGET HER MAGIC! God I want Catarina to get better at magic. More than just Earth Bumps pls

All in all? I love this anime. 9.5/10. Tis good stuff. And if ya read all my late night/oops it’s 4am ramblings, good on you! I feel bad tagging this cuz it’s long but I’m also on mobile so god knows what this actually looks like but I needed my thoughts down so hey, thanks

[littleeyesofpallas]

The other day i had a kinda drunken rant I went on with a friend that I had wished I could’ve written down.  But today I read an article about the shift in hollywood marketing from star power to IP and character driven power instead: the idea being that an original movie used be able to draw crowds with the basic idea of “your favorite star as <insert role>” but we’ve moved more towards the appeal of familiar franchise names like “from the creator of XYZ.”  But I think this is an interesting place to draw the line because it does go back to that drunken rant.  So, here I go again... this is gonna be lo~ng and boring (and this is the shortest possible version) and without pictures, but god knows i have no idea what i would put to accompany this super tangent-filled tirade, so I guess just buckle up...

(I apologize now for all the weird side subjects that I’m going to name drop but just not take the time here to go in depth with.)

I don’t even remember where my drunken rant with my friend the other night started so my first obstacle is finding a place to even begin with this because it has so many entry points and none of them are any closer to where this all ends than any other so like.... whatever...  Shakespeare.

It’s a super complicated thing but in the first era of professional english theatre  that Shakespeare ushered in (from the mid-late 1500s to early-mid 1600s) there were strong strong associations with theatre and prostitution.  Maybe it was exactly what it sounded like, maybe it was elitist slander against the revolutionary accessibility of the arts to the poor as self debasing, maybe it was the church being really angry about literally everything all the time, maybe it was a little of all of that...  But either way the persisting notion was that a theatre, established or travelling, was a place one could ostensibly go to pay for sex with the troupe’s actors.  of course at the time women weren’t a part of that profession, and while they may have been as much a part of the theater going demographic as anyone else it’s hard to pinpoint how much of the already vaguely defined theatre sex trade they patronized --Point being when we talk about theatres prostituting their actors we’re talking about male theatre goers paying to have sex with male actors, and predominantly those young boys playing female roles.  In most classic academic circles this is either wholly ignored, brushed aside/glossed over, or sloppily chalked up to “homosexuality.”  But there’s a lot more nuance to that... which is part of the big mess of stuff I’m just not getting into here...

But this is where I draw my line of connection to Kabuki theatre.  Kabuki somewhat infamously had similar practices as all-male theatre and as duel industry for theatre and prostitution.  And as a parallel development it seems to make sense... In England and Japan alike, you have a group of people who by nature of their jobs charm people and constantly move from town to town.  Even if a community or government thinks what they’re doing is wrong, by the time they can take notice or do anything to stop them: they charm, they fuck, they leave.  But unlike Shakespearean theatre, kabuki has a slightly more convoluted history of development.

See, Kabuki started with Izumi-no-Okumo, a shinto shrine maid (ironically also in the 1500-1600s cusp, same as shakespeare) and although a lot of her personal history is lost to time you can imagine the basic development here: a shrine maid tells the myths, she tells the myths dramatically and with with character voice, then all that but with props, and costume, and then dividing roles into separate actors, and collecting donations for the shrine as regular practice anyway but hey look people donate more when they’ve come for a story they enjoy... and then oops you’ve invented theatre.  Also on account of this being started with shinto shrine maids, the form naturally took an all female slant.

Whether it started with Okumo herself or not, as theatre became an established form, and a lucrative one at that, non shinto affiliated women quickly seized the chance to make a living outside the bounds of common peasantry, and with the growth of travelling theatre as an industry that same side venture of prostitution developed.  But here’s where it gets interesting...

Due to things that, again I won’t dive into here, the untaxed revenues of prostitution painted a target on the backs of kabuki actresses, and women were eventually outlawed from theatre.  The art form was of course immensely popular however so to keep the gravy train rolling the theatre form continued but now with all young-male casts, to retain the feminine aesthetics of female kabuki.  This did absolutely nothing to stop the rate of prostitution however, so they outlawed it again and replaced the young boys with grown men.  This still didn’t stop the prostitution but there was other stuff going on in Japan at that point and legislative attentions were pulled elsewhere.

And here’s my weird little take away from this...  it’s not like Kabuki theatre suddenly went from being popular with horny straight men to horny gay men in a seemless and perfectly balanced transition. (and granted japan at the time was a lot more open about their grasp of sexuality compared to now and to the west in general) so presumably a lot of these thirsty theatre goers were just overwhelmingly indiscriminate in their tastes in fucking actors...  But stick a pin in that, we’ve got a tangent to go on!

So around this same time Japan was having kind of a second rennaissance: japan’s high arts culture had first really risen to prominence in the heian period right before the long long descent into the civilwar we all know and lover for all its flashy samurai drama.  When that 400-ish year civil war finally ended and then stabilized under the Tokugawa shogunate in the Edo period, the art scene finally had some room to breathe again, and among many other things ukiyo-e wood block prints saw a huge explosion in popularity.  And part of this tied into Kabuki theatre, as an extremely popular genre of prints were actor portraits and theatre scenes.  Actor portraits in particular are kind of culturally fascinating, because they weren’t simply prints of character illustration, they were frequently labeled with both the character played, the story they featured in, and the name of the actor playing them.  moreover, despite the reverence of classical art historians now, these weren’t fine art at the time; they were mass produced, affordable and disposable.  In major cities, everyone went to see theatre, and everyone bought, kept, and even collected actor portraits.  As theatre seasons and troupes came and went actor portraits came to occupy and kind of cultural value space a lot like American baseball cards in how prestige, rarity, and trading became an entire subculture in and of itself within the sports/theatre community.

Now we see how Japan had created this thriving popular/mass culture, and celebrity culture for itself.  And while the notion of a “parasocial relationship” wouldn’t be formulated and explored until the 1950s-60s in the wake of things like Elvis fever and Beetles mania, that brand of one-sided relationship where you as an audience member form a “relationship” with a celebrity that involves collecting information about their heavily curated persona is exactly what japan stumbled into some 300 years earlier.  And in fact Japanese pop culture would maintain a lineage of parasocial relationships during the intervening years (in a way the deification and worship of the emperor as a god-king was a kind of parasocial relationship in the way a secular monarch doesn’t quite achieve) So it’s no surprise that when Takarazuka Revue opened in the 1910s as a new modern all-female theatre form, it attracted a familiar old brand of horny theatre audience --one that maintained a very nebulous relationship with the now much more stringent notions of gender and its relation to sexuality.

taking this tangent a little further, Japanese pop culture has always shown this interesting, self-aware approach to the parasocial relationship dynamic that western cultures seems to lack.  I remember that when the 1990s put boy bands briefly into the spotlight, the thing that sunk them in the American eye seemed to be this weird sense of betrayal that the boys werent some garage band rags to riches story, and they didnt write their own music, or make their own dance moves, or even sing live at their own concerts.  America seemed to be repulsed by this notion of a manufactured pop hit.  Japan however (and Korea soon to follow) seemed to thrive in this instead; there was no pretense that J-pop idols weren’t manufactured, and in fact they took pride in the rigors of having been hand picked and raised to stardom --of course they were scouted and trained, because the idol could’ve been any of millions but it was them who got picked, it was them who sang the best, performed the best, climbed the charts, and fought to stay there.  Stardom wasn’t an art form, it was a contest, and they were WINNING.

And the manufactured nature of that J-pop idol business model is what gave rise to Hatsune Miku (in fact there were multiple attempts in the 1980s to design and market a wholly fictional pop idol, but if anything they were too ahead of their time and lacked the technology to really sell the idea in its best form) because when your entire product is about making and curating your performers’ public persona, to the extreme level at which them having their own lives actually starts to contradict their stage persona and hurt their marketability... why bother projecting the persona onto a real person?  Why not just cut the human component out all together and just market the persona for what it is?  And for Japan I think that kind of relationship was one that they were culturally always just a few steps away from being ready to accept anyway, so it just took a little persistence.

Then came the anime waifu thing...  Dating sims, and body pillow marriages, etc... and I think the pretty unanimous impulse to turn this into a enormous joke (and lets be real who could blame anyone for that) overlooks what actually happened here: paraosocial relationships in the purest form, with the fleshy middleman removed and with it the lie, not less false but somehow now false yet honest.  A bizarre paradox to be sure...

But now lets back this up...  Kabuki theatre.  Prostitution.  The change from women to young boys to men, and the almost hilarious unflappably bisexual audience who embraced it.  I don’t think it was a component of sexuality as any historians who have looked at that time period bothered to conceive of it.   Because even in an early japanese mass culture scene, the relationship was between the audience and the persona, and not the audience and the actors; The audience was always in love with the characters in their collectible trading prints, with their 15th century waifus, and they paid to have sex with those personas regardless of the bodies or real people involved.

...

okay, so, I typed all that out weeks ago and then just left it in my drafts, not even really intending to come back to it.  And now that I’m here, I don’t know that I had a point to this when i went on my drunk rant.  But i guess if there was any kind of a take away from this, it’s that I find that people have a lot of trouble separating personal identity from gender, from performance, from social dynamics... and in western culture, especially within recent history/memory, that’s kind of understandably hard to untangle. But historically people’s sexuality and sense of attraction have basically always been based implicitly on attraction to an idea made manifest in a persona first, and a body to match it only secondarily to that;

Society’s abiding dedication to forcing you into a gendered box, and to box gender into a narrow range of performance, is equitable to screeching fans being “in love” with celebrities they’ve never met and convinced that the steady feed of curated marketed personality traits constitute “knowing” those celebrity strangers.  The idea that the person and the persona are the same is a lie told to sell product.  Gender is just the brand.  You’re the rockstar.  Fuck marketing.

[briek58454521]

Cancel Culture?...

Okay.

I’ve seen this shit going around for a while. I feel obligated to correct the record.

In the wake of multiple Breadtube users being eviscerated by the public in the last year, I’d like to talk... about “cANceL cULTurE”.

But first, some back-round. I’ll be brief.

Over a year ago, Youtuber Lily Orchard’s video about Steven Universe blew up the internet, invoking praise from many facets of online culture, as well as a sizable backlash, as any video criticizing Steven Universe will invariably do. In an attempt at a response, Breadtuber Sarah Z uploaded a video titled “Bad Media Criticism”, which around 17 minutes in, talked about said video.

The response was filled with, let’s face it, lies and actual bad faith criticisms towards the content, misinformation, omission of context in important bits, and general shoddiness in action (yes, I’m biased. Reality is biased, sometimes). Criticism was swift to arrive, and the video provoked Lily herself to respond. And in the face of the factual corrections, and legitimate criticisms... Sarah doubled down, and in her infamous Twit-Longer, decided to continue to assure herself and others that her criticism was valid because regardless of whatever Lily actually said, it was still bad faith criticism.

A short while after that, fellow Breadtuber Lindsay Ellis uploaded a video discussing Black Ariel, claiming that the decision to make Ariel black was entirely a decision made because of “Woke Branding” to make more money off of people and continue raking in more and more cash, citing HBomberGuy’s “WOKE BRANDS” video essay. Many commented that this was rather racist, considering that Cartoon Network is just as much of a greedy bastard corporation as Disney was, yet, denounced criticism of Steven Universe, a show of Cartoon Network’s body of work, because “support minority voices”, with the same people commenting that this looked rather selective.

Lindsay doubled down on the criticism, and would continue defending it and publicly shitting the bed as more shitstorms (PLURAL) would erupt (lol).

After THAT, Breadtuber CONTRAPOINTS/ NATALIE WYNN would publish many videos that kept pissing of trans and non-binary viewers with a fuck-load of back handed remarks and general derogatory comments about them, as well as getting pissy that people ask for her gender and pronouns in public safe-spaces. In “The Aesthetic”, Natalie had a character playing the role of the people who make the CORRECT claim that gender is eternal and that you are what you say you are, and ANOTHER who was a truscum who would repeat the arguments that “kinda hypothetical” and, “kinda a weak argument”. This would create a backlash, and Natalie would respond with a thread that, contained a lotta shit, but also contained THIS BULLSHIT. Straight from the horses mouth, fam.

“I’m sure this is not the experience of many NBs. I’ll leave it to them to articulate what NB existence looks like in a binary world. I do not and cannot speak for them. But surely(sic) an account that begins and ends with “I’m not a man because I don’t identify as one” is pretty weak”

Later, after deleting the thread and getting more shit for it, she would upload an absurd non-apology video called “Pro-nouns”, where she would dress up like a fucking clown-ass Oompa-Loompa who just escaped from Wonka’s Chocolate Factory, and make several dumb-ass claims and a fuck-ton of truscum arguments, including stating that she “wants to be a convert” to “believe” NBs, and that she would listen and respect NB people’s beliefs “so long as those beliefs are valid” After more backlash to that happened, she would continue this trend, platforming actual truscum like Buck Angel, selling anti-semetic reptilian agenda merchandise, and hosted a Patreon stream where she just... basically shat on everyone. She shat on people like HBomberGuy, for performativity in regards to the meme “Donkey Kong said Trans Rights” (yes, she is that desperate. She will accuse people who raise 340,000 fucking dollars of performativity and virtue-signaling), stated that older trans people would be considered truscum, and even that most of her friends were truscum.

The one thing that was consistent in these stories was the insistence that the criticism was just an attempt at Cancel Culture.

Cancel Culture is essentially the point where in an attempt to either exclude, harass, or target others for political views, religion, ethnicity, race, sexuality, gender, etc., people will devolve into many forms of online harassment and abuse of the media outlets, among other things, in order to silence the target, or deter the target from making an argument. It can even happen just because people don’t like someone.

For Sarah, this took the form of accusing the people criticizing Steven Universe of having a dishonest double-standard, because if a straight, white, cis-dude made it, no one would be saying shit about it. Even though the show is historically praised by WHITE progressives, and criticized by EVERYONE else.

For Lindsay, it was that the people making this claim were just fooled by the “Woke Brand” train.

For Natalie, it was “the Left is eating itself”.

I would like to say this right now. The only time I actually saw Cancel Culture in action was during the shitstorm that erupted with VivziePop and her pilots for Hazbin Hotel, and Helluva Boss came out and everyone was looking for a bunch of shit to bring up about Vivzie personally, her apparent “transphobia”, “homophobia” as understood by Steven Universe fans, and generally just a bunch of bullshit that Rebecca Sugar got away with when she pulled the same shenanigans.

That is Cancel Culture.

And the only reason I can see for it was just because Vivzie (to my knowledge, at least) isn’t a member of the LGBT community. (Those same people would respond to her stating that she plans on having Alistor, the Radio Demon, be ace with “Hey, did you hear something?”, btw)

(EDIT: I initially stated, as shown above, that Vivzie wasn’t a LGBT community member. She is. She’s bi. Apologies for getttin that bit wrong. I’d also like to mention that she’s Latin as well, but is also shit-talked for apparently being too white to be Latin. 

So......yeah. Can’t begin to imagine why all of those mentioned weren’t given the same treatment.... Was there any doubt when Lindsay said she was Native?......)

And that wasn’t the case with any of the aforementioned. Natalie wasn’t “cancelled” until she kept shitting on people for the fiftieth (hyperbolicly fiftieth) time. Sarah was never cancelled. She got away with slander, and was quickly forgiven just because she’s a leftist. Lindsay is getting away with excusing away, and flat out DEFENDING PEDOPHILIA, AND IS STILL POSTING. She ain’t cancelled.

Cancel Culture may happen sometimes, genuinely, like with Vivzie, but those are the exceptions that prove the rule. It’s mostly just “this person said I sound completely contrary to what I believe, it must be (insert cause)”

It’s Lily’s fault, it’s a dishonest double-standard, it’s the radicals, it’s Woke Brand brain-washing, it’s “bAd faITh cRitISIsm”, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah...

Let me tell you something. In Sarah’s case, not all criticism is because there’s a dishonest double-standard. And even if it were, that doesn’t make doing something horrible because of your identity the right thing to do. Because NO ONE should be putting in the most racist, bigoted, and frankly gross and disgusting shit in their work, regardless of whether you’re white, black, gay, lesbian, trans, NB, Gen Z, Boomer, etc. Like the human zoo, the Amethyst-Garnet fusion, Bismuth, the Pearl-Rose dynamic, the Nazi woobification, and the blatant disregard for the very people the show claims to be an ally too.

See also, the N-Word.

Despite the belief that white people can’t say it while black people CAN, black people don’t use it in a conversation formally, and can’t really use it ANYWAY because it’s still a fucking slur. And if you say it in public, there will be consequences, whether it be social repercussions, or legal action. And people have been saying it less and less as a result of this attitude becoming more present.

In regards to Lindsay, we know, bitch. We fucking know. We know that Disney wants our money like crazy. We know that this could be just another woke branding thing. We know that brands aren’t our friends, we know, we know, we know, we know. We know, Lindsay, we know. But, don;t chat shit about it if you aren’t going to criticize Cartoon Network for Steven Universe, Amazon for selling Pride merch, and Target for Pride clothes. Because then we know that you’re being very selective about what you’re labeling as “woke branding”.

In regards to Natalie, SHUT THE FUCK UP. SHUT THE FUCK UP. That is literally all you have to do. Just SHUT. THE FUCK. UP. And accept that you aren’t as woke as you like to think you are. The left isn’t eating it’s own by disowning shitty people. It’s doing itself a favor for it.

Remember R. Kelly? Everyone said that black people were just turning on each other when actual, legitimate evidence came forward, showing that he;s a FUCKING PEDOPHILE. And that attitude would continue for almost three decades before someone FINALLY said, “No, this man is dangerous, lock him up”. You know the phrase “A few bad apples?” People only say that, and just ignore the rest when defending shitty people on the Left, mostly because they don’t want to disown them. The phrase, however is ACTUALLY “A few bad apples SPOIL THE BUNCH”. If you don’t weed out the bad ones, they’ll spoil the tree.

Most of this bullshit would have been solved easily if ANY of the aforementioned had looked at their behavior, ACTUALLY apologized, expressed due diligence, and STOPPED FUCKING DOING THE SHIT.

The only reason people get away with this is because A LOT OF PEOPLE ON THE INTERNET HAVE FUCKING TERRIBLE PRIORITIES.

People take more offense to someone shutting down an opinion rather than someone being a scumbag.

People jut decided not to care about Sarah’s lies ENTIRELY because “It’s Lily”.

People defended Lindsay entirely because “Fuck Disney”.

People defended Natalie because “The Left is eating itself, we need to support minority voices”.

Because the myth of Leftist-Cancel Culture is just an excuse to not have to change. To not commit. To not put in effort. To not expand time to bettering yourself or the environment around you. To jerk off to how woke you are while criticizing others who tell challenge that. To wax poetic because it’s good for your ego.

It’s not just them. It’s many of their fans, and hundreds of thousands, if not, millions of people on the internet. And by far, their worst deeds aren’t that they inadvertently or otherwise attract Nazis, keep sucking off incels, truscum, TERFs, pedophiles, and other facets of human garbage while disemboweling others for far, FAR lesser crimes on the basis that they aren’t woke or nice enough for their liking, or EVEN the harassment that they’ve engaged in, caused, and instigated.

It’s that they’ve convinced themselves that by doing all of the above, that they are in any way superior to the people they cry foul against. The people who call them out on their bullshit when it arises. The people who raise $340,000 for their OWN people while the most they’ve done is play dress up and recycle Eddie Murphy’s shtick for the 500th time. The people who are part of the very minority voices they claim to support yet disregard on the basis that they said some mean words, or argued in bad faith, or just have a personal grudge against the people that they criticize. The people of color who FLAT OUT know better than them, yet, who they write off at every possible opportunity as just believing that companies care, or that Disney is good, or even just write ‘em off as having the wrong priorities or being stupid, as if they are in any way super clever and superior for coming to a conclusion that many more talented, creative, intelligent, and just frankly BETTER people came to years ago. 

They are MORE PERFORMATIVE, more ENTITLED, more ARROGANT, more IGNORANT, more UNAWARE, more BIASED, more SELFISH, and more SELF-INDULGENT than a good 98% of the people they criticize.

They hate these people so much...because they hate looking in mirrors.

And Leftist Cancel Culture is just a manifestation of that psychological projection. Simple as.

If you skipped to the end, fuck you. No TL: DRs in this neck of ‘da fuckin woods

[joshhhhhhhhhhhhhhh]

Yesterday wo Uttate episode 2 was pretty good. This time we got a bit more insight into the character of Shinako, and real quick I wanna give a shout to KanaHana for her performance here, she’s got a much softer and more contemplative sound than I’ve heard from some of her other roles and she’s really good at it. I’ve not seen every KanaHana role obviously, she might do voices like this quite often, this is just a first for my ears so, props.

As for what we learn it’s just some backstory stuff to justify her hangups about dating Uozomi, namely that she liked this guy who died and she can’t move on, so she feels like she’s going in circles. Pretty standard, broad relatable issue, it also serves as an excuse to introduce the dead dude’s brother who seems to be into Shinako as well? Guy’s got main character energy, we’ve just not spent much time with him yet is all.

Now the main thing this episode does with all this new info is use it to sort of, justify a breakup of friendships between Uozomi and Shinako. This coming after the former’s been contemplating if a man and a woman can just be friends, especially if one of them loves somebody else. My personal opinion is that, yeah fuckin obviously a man and a woman can just be friends, and not to insert too much of myself into this but from personal experience a man and a woman can still be friends even if one loves the other while the other’s in a relationship. Moreover this idea is super heteronormative, though I don’t think that’s a problem since the cast and in fact most of humanity are all straight anyway. But none of that changes that it’s at least an interesting idea to explore in a story, and I mean this early in the story they’re not trying to suggest that either character even made a good decision by ending the friendship so there’s an avenue for development. We’ll see where it goes I suppose.

Best girl Haru’s presence in this episode feels somewhat minimal, she kinda just serves to give some contrast between the men and the women - Uozomi talking to the little brother while Haru and Shinako talk together about their stuff. More specific to Haru’s issues though is that she does obviously want to be with Uozomi, but not really as a compromise because he couldn’t get with Shinako, nor does she herself want to feel like she’s sneaking around Shinako, hence telling her all this. And so she sorta comes up with this competition, just to feel like everything played out fairly, that she could “win” in the game of love. And that comes across as, pretty immature, frankly, so maybe we’ll see that lead to some issues for her down the line idk. I do hope they do more to make Haru a sort of viable love interest in Uozomi’s eyes, cause I mean I fuckin love her she’s a total babe but I’m just the viewer, in universe there’s not much there for Uozomi, and his choices in romance would hold a bit more weight if his options had reasons to be options. We’ll see.

So far the show’s managed to remain interesting and not fuck up and fall into cliche tropes and genre trappings I hate to see, so that’s good. Moreover the visuals are still fucking movie quality so that’s good. Coolio. Also just seems like we’re not getting an OP for the show at any point, which hey I don’t mind, spend more time actually with the show rather than the same 90 second video each week, whatever. And uh, yeah that’s it.

[darkmindsthinktwistedthoughts]

Plots and Pleasing Smiles

@umbralaperture I accepted this “abuse” of my prompt system because it’s a special occasion. I’m only joking of course. Not only did this sound like a challenge, how could I possibly refuse a request for your birthday? I kinda hope this works… Please excuse the shameless self-insert in this one I couldn’t not be there for your special day. x

**The rest of the prompts received for my Thank You Plan will be written and posted starting in August. This is an early reveal of one so I do not miss a birthday.**

ALL THE WARLORDS / Modern / Song #23 / Fluff          

#23: Sonne – Rammstien

WARNING: Strong Language

---

Plots and Pleasing Smiles

Work had been hectic and that was putting it mildly. Everyone seemed to want something doing and it all had to have been done yesterday. She sighed at her desk looking again at the clock on the wall taunting her with the reminder of the low passage of time. 

She thought back on the past week that had seen the rest of the household acting unusual. Hushed voices, whispered secrets and late-night trysts that she had been left out of. She had naturally received constant reassurance that none of it was anything to worry about but how could she not when all the men in her life seemed intent to keep things from her?

*Sigh*

“You know that is you up to 8 sighs per minute? Gonna have to start charging you on excessive exhaling soon.” A mirthful voice came from next to her and it was only then that she noticed the other woman standing next to her.

“Is it? Damn sorry I guess I’m just a little tired.” A thin smile pulled at the edges of her mouth as she looked up at the teasing blue eyes of her friend.

“No wonder.” How many jobs did you get stuck with today? This has to be enough work for 6 people right here.” Aerion reached out and absently flipped the corners on the document files stacked high on the desktop. Her voice had a joking tone but the wince she failed to hide in her expression told a different story. She’s worried about me.

“Probably but it's ok I can do it.” She straightened in her chair again, a new resolve emerging with her attempt to reassure her friend.

“Just because you can do it Naiya doesn’t mean you should.” Aerion declared whilst swooping in to swipe half a stack of the files.

“Hey!” Naiya made a grab for the stolen workload only to have it effortlessly removed from her reach.

“A job halved is one less job for you to do at the end of the day. I’ve nearly finished mine I can do at least this much.” Aerion smiled knowing her friend was in no fit state to really put up a fight.

“Did I ever tell you how much I love you?”

“Not since I brought you coffee earlier. Besides you really want to be throwing around dangerous proclamations like who you love when you have a harem at home?” The smile on her face was as vulpine as someone else’s Naiya knew all too well.

“Haha, must you call them that?” Feeling a blush heating up her face Naiya laughed wryly.

“What else would you like me to call them? Anyway, none of that matters as long as you’re all happy and no one is getting hurt.” Aerion shrugged and thankfully dropped her teasing.

“How supportive.”

“Meh. It’s who I am. Oh shit, that’s my phone!” Scuttling back to her desk to grab the call. Naiya let out a bark of laughter when Aerion had to juggle the files in her arm and the receiver to prevent dropping them. Earning her a small pout from her friend as they stuck their tongue out at her whilst talking in her official business voice.

---

The commute home was cursed. The weather that had been forecast as sun all day had turned into a downpour of rain from nowhere, and it naturally just had to wait to do that at the exact moment she was getting off the train for her short walk home. Dropping her bag on the chair in the hallway she peeled her coat off discovering it had done nothing to prevent her from getting soaked.

“Great.” She grimaced and pulled a little at the fabric sticking to her skin.

“Princess you’re home!” The delighted voice didn’t give her a chance to prepare herself for the hug attack. A pair of deceptively strong arms wrapped around her from behind, the smell of peaches tickling her nose.

“That looks like fun. May I join?” He was a little more reserved than Ranmaru but it was clear Mitsunari was no less happy to welcome her home.”

“Sure. Hi Honey.” She freed her arms from the embrace she was already in to hold them out for the second man to come to her. An invitation he happily accepted. She giggled suddenly remembering Ieyasu’s comment about it like being greeted by a couple of puppies.

“We’ve all been waiting for you. You’re soaked!” Ranmaru pulled away from her suddenly realising the state she was in and began giving her a concerned look from the top of her head to her toes.

“Well, it did rain.”

“Come inside quickly I’ll go grab a towel. Ranmaru would you?” Mitsunari slipped away leaving her arms and she shivered at the loss of warmth.

“On it.” Ranmaru stooped down to scoop her up into a princess style carry and began walking as if she weighed no more than a throw pillow.

“I can walk you know?”

“Yes, but this way I get to hug you and get you warm all at once. You not want me to Princess?” He constructed his face into one that looked like a wounded puppy. He knew she couldn’t say anything against those eyes.

“That look should be illegal how do you expect me to say no?”

“Ran, put her down over here.” Kennyo called out from the sofa looking up from a book he had rested on the arm. Depositing her gently next to the calming influence in the house Ranmaru vanished into the kitchen where what sounded like a small army was fighting.

“Now then Angel drink this.” A large hand and honeyed voice supplied a steaming cup of cocoa. She relaxed even more finally feeling like she was officially home and took a sip.

“God that’s sweet.”

“I tried to stop him putting in so much sugar but he insisted it was not sweet enough.” Yuki grumbled his complaint from his position by Sasuke. It looked like the pair were engrossed in watching something on the latter’s laptop. Another project for work, I guess?

“Sweets are good for reviving the soul Yuki.” Shingen’s serious reply earned him an eye roll from the younger man.

“And rotting your teeth.” Hideyoshi gave his own opinion to no one, in particular, making her giggle at the familiar warmth in the room.

“If he had no teeth would he stop with the stomach-turning pillow talk?” Kenshin enquired swirling his glass of wine.

“Come on Kenshin we all said we’d give it a rest for the night.” Yoshimoto shrugged in a non-committal display of preferring not to get involved in anything that could develop into a war in the living room. His reclined pose by the window made him look like a finely sculpted work of art.

“You all did that? What exactly is going on?”

“Nothing for you to worry about, little mouse.” She had no idea where he had sprung from but Mitsuhide gave her nose a small tap with his finger startling her. A soft white towel fell over her head, turning her world dark for a few moments until she put down her empty cup and moved it enough to give a small judging glare to the smirking kitsune.

“Mitsuhide you have all been saying that for a week. I know I was busy with work but if something is going on, I want to know about it.” Naiya pouted, suppressing the sigh she knew was there.

“Fireball.” Nobunaga entered the room handing a large plain box off to Hideyoshi before grabbing a glass of whiskey and taking a seat. What is going on tonight? Hideyoshi vanished into the kitchen, her eyes followed him before tracking back to Nobunaga. “Do you not trust us?” Nobu had that unreadable expression fixed on his face as he looked at her. The same one he used in a boardroom when listening to someone give a report.

“You know I do. I just don’t like being left out the loop.” She busied herself with the towel drying off her hair only to find it plucked from her hands by Hideyoshi who had taken over the task without asking.

“It’s true even at work she has to know everything.” Mitsuhide cast out his playful comment as he watched Hideyoshi take over his usual mothering role.

“Well, how do you expect me to do my job if I didn’t?”

“Fair point.”

“What smells so good anyway?” Naiya tried to turn her head to get a better view of the kitchen. Every time one of the others went in or out the door served as a kind of fan to waft the smell of gastric temptation around. The only issue was from the angle she was in, and the speed with which they were all moving she couldn’t even get a glimpse.

“Dinner. Masa is doing it. It was supposed to be a BBQ but then the heaven’s opened and quashed that plan.” Shingen filled her in with as much detail as he was willing to divulge. Hideyoshi had retreated after smoothing down her hair attempting to stop Nobu from eating whatever contraband he suddenly noticed he had. Mitsuhide was stifling a laugh that probably gave away the fact that he was the source of whatever breach of the “no candy before dinner” rule.

“Are you warm enough?” Kennyo asked after softly closing his book and putting an arm around her shoulders, giving her a small squeeze.

“Yes, thank you Kennyo dear.”

“Dinner is about to come out. Are you all gonna get your butts into the dining room?” Masa bounced out the kitchen a tea towel draped over one shoulder bashing a ladle against a pot lid to gain everyone’s attention.

“Eloquent as ever Masa.” Yoshimoto cracked a joke that had everyone laughing before rising from his seat.

“Hey man, my food speaks for itself.”

“It’s true and it has much better manners.” Ieyasu grumbled from by Masa’s elbow as they had both been in the kitchen.

“HEY! Just for that Yasu I’m putting one less strawberry on your desert.” Masa tried to make a grab for the fluffy-haired blonde and missed.

“See if I care.”

---

“Oh my god! What is all this?” She couldn’t quite get over it. When they all made it to the dining room nothing was as it was normally. The furniture was still there but it was now covered in finely crafted paper decorations and things that looked like glitter gems. Fairy lights and strings of lanterns had been draped around the space too.

“It was supposed to be a surprise BBQ dinner but when it rained, we had to set everything up in here instead.” Ieyasu explained.

“We wanted to have dinner under the moon with our brightest star.” Shingen took her hand placing a kiss on the back of it.

“More poetic claptrap.” Kenshin said brushing past into the room making for the drinks set up on the sideboard.

“You guys did all this?”

“Yes. Ranmaru and Mitsunari were in charge of helping Yoshimoto with the paper decorations. Kennyo went out with Hideyoshi and Shingen to gather the rest of the decorations. Masa dragged Ieyasu around the market for the food.” Sasuke began his break down of the day's events as if he was reciting something from one of his science reports.

“It was hell” Ieyasu muttered his ears turning a little red for some reason.

“Kenshin and Mitsuhide arranged all the drinks. And Yukimura and I were in charge of all the setting up. And the dismantling…”

“And the setting up... again.” Yuki added putting an arm around Sasuke’s shoulders a proud smile on his face.

“Haha, that all sounds like a hell of a lot of work. Was this what you were all being so secretive about?” Naiya looked around the room the many smiling faces of the people she loved and who loved her in return. “It’s wonderful but don’t you think it’s a little overly elaborate for dinner?”

“What do you mean?” The smiles from before were replaced by ones of varying confusion.

“Oh, dear it seems the Princess has forgotten.” Mitsunari gave a kind look as he empathised with her. What? What have I forgotten?

“I think you could be right.”

“Foods here come and get it!” Masa came in carrying the last of the large platters of food, the roast beef and chicken carved up beautifully in a mouth-watering display.

“Great I’m starving.” The last man to join in the gathering stood in the doorway making an over-exaggerated display out of stretching, his shirt untucking itself from his pants revealing just a hint of bare skin at his hips

“Hey, Motonari where did you just spring from?” Ranmaru gave a judgemental glare. In all the break down of things done today, it didn’t appear that the guy with a reputation as most hard to pin down when chores were being done had actually done anything to help today.

“Nowhere. I was sleeping. Ooo chicken!” With carefree abandon and completely ignoring anyone else’s opinions on the matter, Motonari grabbed a chicken leg from the platter as it was being set down and brought it up to his mouth taring a piece off it like a caveman.

“Hey don’t go taking it like that! Bloody Pirate.”

“Snooze you lose.”

“What is it I’m supposed to have forgotten?” Her words drew 13.5 sets of eyes back to her as she was guided into her seat at the table. Seriously what is so important?

“What tomorrow is Fireball.” Nobu took a cake from a different table carrying it over to put in front of her. The beautiful mirror glaze looked like a galaxy.

“Nobu is that?”

“I went into town myself on an errand and got this from your favourite bakery.”

“Oh my…” Her eyes fell on the scripture picked out in flowing fondant on the top.

You are our Sun in the daytime and Brightest Star in our night

The room was silent for a moment waiting for her blissfully happy smile to settle on her face before it was broken by a chorus of voices. How could I have forgotten this?

“1, 2, 3… Happy Birthday, Princess!”

---

[mx-ishikawa]

Pieces of Us (1): Special

Hey there! more fanfiction from me, this time for The LEGO Movie! it was long overdue, but better late than never lmao. this franchise means so much to me, and I've been wanting to write out how my self-insert fits into the story for the longest time, but I wasn't sure how to do it. so I decided to break it up into snippets! this is the first, taking place during the speech scene in Cloud Cuckooland. after this, we'll start getting into the events of the second movie (and yes, Rex will eventually show up), but for now, here's the first meeting with Emmet!

           I had never seen anything like it in all my life.

           Cloud Cuckooland, filled to the brim with Master Builders from every realm, more excited than they had been in years. Joyous shouts of “The Piece of Resistance has been found!” echoed over and over. And I stood in the middle of all the celebration, completely bewildered.

           “I’ll be damned,” I breathed. “She actually did it.”

           When I first heard the news, I assumed Wyldstyle had found the Piece. After all, she was determined to become the Special, and had just left for Bricksburg, the last place in which the Piece was searched for as it was the riskiest, the day before. And now it had been found, who else could’ve done it? I was relieved that she didn’t get arrested, and looked forward to whatever plan she had in store to stop Lord Business.

           I discreetly made my way into the Dog, trying not to be noticed by the Master Builders. Even though Cloud Cuckooland claimed not to have any rules, I wasn’t sure if I’d get in trouble for being at a Master Builder meeting when I wasn’t actually a Master Builder myself. Despite my dad being a skilled Master Builder, I never could pick up the talent. I think the biggest reason is because a lot of Master Building involved clearing your mind to focus, and Man Upstairs knows I was never able to do THAT. If I can’t even turn my brain off long enough to fall asleep at night within a reasonable amount of time, how the hell was I supposed to do it to learn an entire skill? But that didn’t stop me from trying, as I continued to train whenever I could, which was hard when you risked capture by Lord Business.

           I picked a spot at the edge of the stands, sitting down in front of them and making myself as small as I could. I spotted my dad seated more obviously in the crowd, keeping mostly to himself as I did. I pulled out my sketchbook and began to doodle as I waited for the wizard Vitruvius to arrive with the Special. I looked around the Dog once more, and it was sad how few Master Builders were left uncaptured. I only hoped that the rest of them, led by Wyldstyle, would be able to free everyone.

           In many ways, I was jealous of Wyldstyle. She was so much cooler, smarter, tougher, stronger, and more attractive than I could ever hope to be. If anyone was fit to lead the Master Builders, it was her. It was no wonder she managed to get Batman of all people as a boyfriend. But my jealousy only gave me more reason to admire her, rather than hate her. No, I could never hate her, she’s done far too much for me. Though I couldn’t help but wish I could even begin to compare to her. Hell, wishing was all I could do.

           I was soon snapped out of my thoughts when Vitruvius made his way to the stand and addressed the crowd. Behind him, I saw Wyldstyle, Batman, Princess Unikitty, and an average-looking construction worker. Where had he come from? I didn’t recall seeing him at any previous Master Builder gatherings. He was looking around in innocent wonder, so he had probably never been in here before. He was then jolted out of his daze as Vitruvius spoke the words that many Master Builders had been waiting to hear for the past eight and a half years.

           “The Special has arisen.”

           Gasps and whispers were tossed back and forth as the news of the Special was officially announced, and I was shocked to see that all eyes were not on Wyldstyle, but the construction worker. He found the Piece? I couldn’t believe it wasn’t Wyldstyle. He looked up at everyone and appeared nervous, shifting his wide eyes a bit.

           After a brief tiff with Gandalf and Dumbledore, Vitruvius spoke once more. “The Special will now give an eloquent speech.” He moved out of the way to make room for the construction worker. He was hesitant to step forward. I noticed how unsure he looked. He looked down at his feet, messing with his hands a bit, before looking back up at the crowd. He just seemed so shy. Perhaps that’s what first drew me to him, as I had always found shy guys to be adorable. Vitruvius poked in one more time, probably to reassure the Special, who then finally stepped forward rather cautiously. It was unusually silent as he made his way to the stand. I could hear the echoes of his footsteps and small grunts as he made it up to the stand. His chest heaved as he braced himself to speak.

           “Hello!” he finally spoke, raising his hand in a wave. He began to rock back and forth on his heels a bit. “I’m Emmet.”

           Emmet, huh? That name was kinda cute. He was kinda cute. A small smile crept its way onto my face.

           “Oh, and this is the Piece of Resistance.” Everyone cheered as Emmet turned around to reveal the Piece of Resistance, stuck to his back! I was silent for a moment, wondering how that happened, before joining in on the cheering and clapping. Emmet looked around in amazement, as if he hadn’t expected so much praise. “Thank you…” And then, his nervousness seemed to fade away. “Well, uhhhh, I know that I, for one, am very excited, to work with you guys! To get into the Octan tower, find the Kragle, and put this thing on the thing! And I know it’s going to be really hard, but—”

           His speech was cut short when the sound of clanking metal suddenly filled the room. It was Metalbeard. Oh boy, he was probably here to tell the story of how he tried to sabotage Octan and ended up losing his body again, wasn’t he? As it turned out, he did just that, leaving Emmet in a state of mild distress. I tuned out most of Metalbeard’s story, having heard it multiple times before, and focused on Emmet. I had noticed how much more confident he had suddenly appeared right before he was interrupted, and just how expressive he was. But now he was recoiling, presumably wary of Metalbeard’s hulking stature.

           “So if ye think it be a good idea to return to that forsaken place, Special,” Metalbeard finished, “what idea have ye that be better than the ideas of one hundred of our fallen Master Builder brothers?”

           Emmet shuffled, struggling to find the answer. “Uhh… well technically, I’m not a Master Builder yet, but—”

           “WHAT?!” Metalbeard cried. The crowd fell into chaos, and my own mouth hung agape. He wasn’t a Master Builder? But I was sure that only a Master Builder could be the Special! Heck, I could’ve tried to become the Special! Not that I would be a good fit for that role. I didn’t have adequate leadership skills. I was snapped from my daze when Emmet spoke again.

           “Please, everyone, please!” he tried to calm everyone down. Something was thrown at him, but he dodged it. “Yes, it’s true.” His face took on a rather sad expression as he continued. “I may not be a Master Builder. I may not have a lot of experience fighting, or leading, or coming up with plans. Or having ideas in general. In fact, I’m not all that smart. And I’m not what you’d call a creative type. Plus, generally unskilled. Also, scared, and cowardly.” I was amazed at how strong Emmet’s voice was as he made all these self-depreciative claims. If he really was everything he said he was, then at least he had the balls to admit it. “I know what you’re thinking: he is the least qualified person in the world to lead us!” He paused for a minute, giving the crowd an unfittingly cheerful grin. “And you are right!”

           The crowd fell into whispers and gasps once more, but they weren’t hopeful this time. “This is supposed to make us feel better?” the Gill-Man hissed as the other Master Builders began throwing things at Emmet.

           “Well, there was about to be a ‘but’—”

           “You’re a butt!” Gandalf sneered. A sick feeling rose in my chest as the crowd became increasingly angry, some even walking out. This isn’t right! He might not be a Master Builder, but he did find the Piece! Qualified or not, at least give him a chance! Was I really the only one who admired Emmet’s honestly and hopefulness in his speech?

           “Why is everyone leaving?” Emmet cried, dodging everything thrown at him. “Come on, guys! We can still do this! Right?”

           The knot in my stomach grew. I saw Batman whispering something to Wyldstyle, who appeared unsure of this mess herself. Any trace of hope was drained from Emmet as his brows knitted together. He looked like he was about to cry. I heard the word “disappointment” from somewhere in the crowd, and that was when Emmet finally turned and trudged away, shoulders slumped in shame.

           That’s. It.

           I wanted to punch every Master Builder left in this room! I wanted to shout for everyone to stop and call them out for their harshness! What did Emmet do to be so cruelly rejected?! But I didn’t dare open my mouth. Instead, I made my way over to the shunned Special, making sure to tread lightly and avoid tossed objects. I had no idea what I was doing, but I had to do something.

           “Hey,” I began when I was close enough to Emmet. He looked up at me in surprise, tears threatening to spill from his eyes.

           “I uhh… I have faith in you.”

           “Really?” Emmet gasped.

           “Yeah, I mean, I’m not a Master Builder either, nor am I smart or skilled, but I’m also not as hopeful as you are, so… I think you’ll do good. Sorry everyone’s being a bunch of jerks.”

           Emmet made a small, sad chuckle. I wanted to hug him so badly. “It’s alright. At least it can’t get any worse.”

           That’s when I heard the sound of a giant orb crashing through the roof.

[forkanna]

[AO3 LINK]

It took me all night to stop feeling embarrassed about the scene Knives caused. Maybe deep down, I really did feel flattered that she cared this much, but it was buried under so much shame and annoyance that I couldn't even feel it accurately. Where did she get off inserting herself into my life as some weird kind of protector? Especially since I didn't need any protecting. At all. That was just some random crap I made up to make it clear that I wasn't interested in her hanging around and making me feel better. Not my fault she was too dense to realise.

A few days later, I saw her again. Just enough time to forget that the whole incident happened before I was freshly reminded because she came barging back into my life. Great.

"Are you stalking me?"

"What?" Knives asked, trying to casually drop down from the tree branch. She landed with a quiet tmp against the little patch of grass around the trunk, a would-be innocent smile playing across her lips. "Noooo… not at all."

"Because it feels like you're stalking me. And what's with that?"

"Nothing!" Her hand whipped to one side, throwing the binoculars so hard that they disappeared into the sky with a brief gleam. "Nobody was watching you since you left the house this morning, don't be silly!"

Sighing, I continued walking down the pavement. She kept pace with me; now that I'd found her out, apparently she had decided there was no point in keeping a low profile anymore. My hands clenched into fists in my hoodie pockets. "Fine. What do you want?"

"Well… I'm trying to do surveillance."

"Yeah, I got that."

"For the challenges? You know… see if I can tell from the outside anything more about what I'll face on the inside. So far, nothing obvious. But I wanna be ready!"

"For the imaginary challenges? Wow, quelle surprise."

"Are they imaginary though?" she breathed with a slight squinting of her eyes.

"Dude… you are so weird." For some reason, that made her grin at me, and I rolled my eyes. Didn't seem to be any point in trying to get rid of her anymore, so I just said, "I'm going to work. You won't have anything to do there but watch me watch old movies."

"I love old movies! Like, like… the first Harry Potter!"

Inwardly, I died a little.

                                                      ~ o ~

This manic chick actually came with me to the video rental store. I shouldn't have to tell you that in this millennium, especially after the first decade of it, there's really no point in even having a video rental store anymore, so we had no customers. It was literally hours of sitting around and watching movie after movie, while maybe one guy came in and asked where 'the good stuff' was kept. My glare sent him packing.

"So was it that bad wherever you went for uni that you ended up slumming it back here again?"

"Not bad," Knives told me as she sat on the counter, spinning the orange she had gotten from a convenience store on the way in her hands. It was the last thing either of us had to eat after we made our way through some cheesy Nineties rom-com. "Just not home. Toronto is just, you know? Like… everything's so cool here."

"Yeah, it's freezing."

"Not right now. Summer in Toronto is like, the best. Plus my friend Tamara lives here, I was hoping I'd see her."

There was something about how genuine Knives was that reminded me of Scott when we first met. That could probably play a role in why they were attracted to each other in the first place, and I might be more certain of that if I were some kind of TV pop-psychologist. As in, Scott saw something of his younger self in Knives, the way he was before he broke my heart and Envy broke his in turn. Yadda yadda.

Maybe that's why I hadn't thrown her out yet. Nostalgia.

"Kim?"

"What?" I snapped, since I had been snapped out of my stupor.

"The movie's over."

"Oh…" Ducking my head, I reached over to pull the DVD of 'The Mystical Head' out of the player. "Shit…"

Head tilted to one side, Knives asked me, "What would you be watching if you had to pick? Right now?"

"Zombie Corpse Mutilator IV: The Zombining."

"Really? Is it any good? I don't watch very many scary movies…"

With a long sigh, I stood up and stretched my arms over my head. Knives tried to balance the orange on the bridge of her nose, failed, and caught it before it fell very far. "You probably just want me to put on some drivel like 'Let's Hope There's A Heaven,' don't you?"

"No," she laughed easily. "What about… 'Seven Shaolin Masters'? I like action, but not like, just a bunch of stuff blowing up. And I heard that one's supposed to be pretty authentic, it was done by a Chinese director."

The way she looked all bright-eyed and bushy-tailed reminded me of a squirrel spotting a nut it hadn't cracked yet. Maybe I was the nut. Who knows? But for some reason, her excitement and complete disregard of whether or not I crapped all over her good mood was getting past my defenses. So much so that I said…

"Sure. Think we have a few copies."

We watched it. Not a bad flick. I guess I like it about as much as I like anything, really. Not high praise, but you get the picture. Knives was eating it up. Really… the weirdest part is that she never complained about having to sit there on the counter, just hopped down once in a while to stretch her legs and lean against it instead. Like we had been doing this for years: her coming to hang out with me while I 'worked'. Felt like the plot of some low-budget indie film, shot in black-and-white to be 'ironic'.

About halfway through, she did go to the lavatory, and when she came back she stayed behind the counter. I started to tell her she wasn't allowed, but decided I didn't care enough. Maybe I'm getting soft at the ripe old age of twenty-four.

"Hey," I suddenly asked, during a boring part in which the main character was meditating.

"Hm?"

"What are you doing?"

"Watching a movie."

"No… I mean like, going to uni. What's your whole deal?" I cringed; that was a pretty crappy way to ask the question. But, as usual, Knives didn't seem to mind.

"Not really sure. Just want to figure out what I'm doing. My mom wants me to be a doctor, but that is so not happening. Like… I kinda want to found a martial arts school. Super cliché, but I've never really been good at anything else, except fangirling. Which isn't really a 'job' I can get."

"Sure you could. Rent yourself out as a professional fangirl."

Her eyes went round. "You can do that?!" But for once, she seemed to get that I was teasing and smiled. "Aww, silly Kim. But… actually I wonder if there'd be any interest in it… maybe I could start a whole new thing!"

"Weirdo."

"What about you?"

That caught me off guard. "Huh? I'm a drummer."

"Yeah, but you aren't really in a band right now, right? You said you and Neil's sister are just kind of trying stuff."

"It's none of your-" But I cut myself off. This wasn't an interrogation, and Knives wasn't trying to pry. Wasn't trying to. "I just… am trying to figure that out. My life got kicked in the butt by a few events and I need a rebuilding year."

"But it's already been a year since your last band-"

"Knives…"

She fell silent, turning away to finish the movie. She looked guilty, which wasn't really what I wanted; I just wanted her to take the hint that it's not the most fun subject to bring up for me right now. But I didn't know how to tell her that without getting all sappy and feelsy, so I didn't try.

When Comeau came in to relieve me, we split, and she followed along behind like a good puppy. A good stray puppy. One I never wanted, but for some reason, I didn't mind her there. We did start getting along toward the end of Sex Bob-omb's career, I guess.

"You wanna get some food? It's about dinner time. Or you probably have plans, huh?"

Shrugging, I managed to mutter, "Eh." I didn't have any plans. I never had many plans anymore; met up with Stephen once a week, or less. Steph wasn't so much a friend as a colleague… which I guess was where both of them stood with me. Where did everybody go?

"Cool. Wanna get Sneaky Dee's?"

"Ugh… too noisy. Not in the mood."

"Poutine? Sushi?"

I started to make a very vaguely racist joke about sushi being the wrong food for her, but decided it would be more hurtful than funny. Especially to Knives, who only seemed to get the most obvious jokes. "Poutine works. I could use some gravy-laden goodness."

"Cool. Let's do it!"

She skipped off down the path, hair bouncing on the breeze. I didn't notice before that she was still keeping it short, I was so focused on the fact that she stopped dyeing it in the front. Kind of a compromise between who she had been before Scott and who she was after, maybe.

Not that I knew why I was noticing now. I must really have been bored. "Wait up, you dumbass," I grumbled under my breath as I trudged after her.

                                                      ~ o ~

Somehow, grabbing dinner with this almost-a-stranger was fine. She gushed about college life, about some group of friends she found online and really connected with or whatever. I was only half paying attention while I chewed. Between bites she was drinking a ginger ale, and kept setting it down so hard that a few droplets would fly up and land on the table, or even on her face. That annoyed me, but it was also kind of… cute somehow. Maybe I needed therapy.

Once we finished up, we walked to the bus stop that would take her back in the direction of her house. It was awkward. There was no real reason for it to be awkward but it was; she looked down at her boots, rocking back and forth with her hands in the small of her back.

"U-um… do you mind if I drop by more? You seemed kind of unhappy to see me at first. If you really want me to leave you alone forever…"

"Yes. I do."

"Okay. S-sorry, Kim."

Now I felt like I was kicking a puppy. She wasn't really that bad; I just hated being forced to endure the company of anyone besides myself and my inner demons. "Ugh… just don't make a big deal about it, and shut up if we get too busy, alright? God."

Her mopey face turned into a wide smile over the course of the following five seconds. "YAY!" No seriously, she said 'yay'. And meant it. What the fuck was she even? Her arms sprang forward, and before I could tell what was about to happen, she had me caught in a crushing hug.

"Let GO. Dude, seriously! Off!"

"I'll see you tomorrow! Oh man, this is gonna be a great summer!" Without any further ado, she pranced over to the bus stop, walking backward so she could wave at me the entire time. Anybody could have predicted that she would trip over the old man's dachshund, but she picked herself up right away with a light giggle, apologising to both of them before waving again.

Our definitions of "great summer" don't have much overlap.

                                                       To Be Continued…

[courage-a-word-of-justice]

Sacred Beasts 2 | Astra 2 - 3 | Given 1 - 2 | DanMachi II 1 | Demon Slayer 15 - 16 | Dr Stone 2 | Fruits Basket 14 | Cop Craft 2 - 3

Rolling out the tags soon.

Sacred Beasts 2

“Sissy” always pissed me off as a nickname for your sister. It’s clearly meant as a term of endearment in some cases, but it also is the equivalent of “wuss”, y’know???

I’ve seen mushroom soup out of a tin…that don’t look like mushroom soup in that case.

Uh, random question…she has th same surname as Will, but is Schaal herself adopted???

Y’should’ve followed Hank, Nancy…(is her name Nancy or Schaal? Schaal is her middle name, yet she seems more commonly referred to as Schaal…hmm.)

*sees synopsis* - No one mentioned Nancy’s hometown was called Livletwood Village…

I pause my shows a lot to get down these notes…then Crunchyroll or my internet (or both!) cursed me with regular buffering (that can sometimes play video and subs through it, but generally sets down a few seconds after unpausing and lasts for a minute) and made it a pain in the butt to make these notes. But you do realise I basically have notes for almost every show I’ve ever watched under this system? These notes are special to me, which is why I put up with the buffering. It also means impactful scenes lose their impact, meaning well-paced shows get favoured in my picking process on CR these days.

Astra 2

Yup, the 2nd time we talk about how to scavenge for food this season – gotta remember this…in case I ever get into a situation like that. You never know! (creates “The More You Know” star with hands)

I-awwwwwww…I never thought I’d see the day where the Luca Javelin would get animated, much less Astra as a series. Dang, is this a dream???

Eyyyyy. Nothing like endangering your little sister to really understand why you love her…much less understand that you love her in the first place. (partially sarcastic)

Given 1

This is my second rodeo with BL anime (I’ve only read one BL manga and it was pretty darn mediocre, but the one BL game I tried was okay)…hopefully it’s good.

Was there the ticking of a clock in the background???

…and cut to OP. Yay! I can predict when the OP happens now…(It only took me years of training…okay, I’m kidding.)

I think this OP is like a music video…and I think that’s the point.

Kaji??? Is this Eva (LOL)?

I’m no band person – I was merely a solo pianist in my time with music, although notably I did have to sing for one of the musical pieces – but “Thom Yorke” and “Keith Richards” sound familiar. Why???...Okay, so it seems Thom Yorke is part of Radiohead and Keith Richards is part of the Rolling Stones. I’m familiar with those bands by name, at least.

Lemme guess…this guy (Ritsuka) sucks at improv.

I had to go back and find out what Yayoi said a few lines ago…and  love her already because she’s like “You suck”…she’s just like me, to be honest.

Early husbando predictions say Haruki is my dude of the season.

Seeing manly dudes act like blushing schoolgirls is great…!

Yushiro-who???...Okay, Yushiro Ishihara is apparently that’s a singer that’s already passed away, but has a bit of a rep behind him.

Is it just me, or is Ritsuka basically a lesser Bakugo…?

Come to think of it, it would be hard for me to teach someone piano now that I haven’t properly played since the end of 2014…almost 5 years. Geesh, that’s a long time.

Welp, that was…actually pretty good. The only thing that sucks is that this ED isn’t rock, to go with the rest of the show.

DanMachi II 1

Another counterintuitive name for a sequel anime season…this is my last premiere before I wrap them up, or at least until Machikado Mazoku (or whatever) land on CR.

…and of course, it’s back to Big Boobies (aka Hestia). She’s probably the worst part of the show for me.

Why does Bell need an advisor anyway…? I never thought about it when watching s1.

Who’s this Naza-sama, anyway…?...Okay, it seems she’s a doctor from the Miach Familia. I don’t remember her from s1, really.

I’ve forgotten who Asfi is as well…Oh yeah, that blue-haired woman from the Hermes Famlia. Hermes seems like a bit of a loose cannon – the sort who wouldn’t have a Familia if given the chance – though.

I think we saw Freya in s1…just scheming behind the scenes…

Hermes looks like a sleazebag half the time he’s on screen…

I forgot how much I loved Miach’s character design in s1...and to a lesser extent, Takemikazuchi.

Demon Slayer 15

…Zenitsu is annoying again.

I didn’t think Tanjiro was scared of anything…excpt maybe losing Nezuko again.

Oh! I just realised Natagumo has a hint in its name…The “gumo” can be read “kumo”…as in cloud or spider, but it’s given with the kanji for spider so it can only be a spider-related problem on Mt Natagumo.

I’d hate to have Smellovision on this show…(What’s Smellovision, you ask??? Here, read up on it…at least, I was thinking of the Google variant, so read up on the Google version.)

Ukogi appears to be a type of plant known as eleutherococcus and ukogi rice is rice with ukogi leaves.

Dr Stone 2

Episode 3’s title is like “Weapons…of SCIENCE! *cue Bill Nye the Science Guy theme song*”

Ooh, nice angle! (on Senku and petrified!Yuzuriha being protected by Taiju…and not just because Yuzuriha’s butt is showing…)

“You can eat lion?” – No duh, Taiju!

“I want to give thanks to the circle of life…” – Sorry, but can I interrupt with a meme here? *cue ululations that ae meant to imitate the iconic song from The Lion King, y’know, the one that goes “Ahhhhhhh zee bun yah… (etc.)”*

Tsukasa’s frickin’ tall, man! Look at him tower over Taiju and Senku…

Having read the manga before, I just realised Tsukasa is mighty suspicious when he says Senku could be able to rebuild civilisation from scratch. That was harder to recognise in manga format though, I think.

I also didn’t realise, but the shell tale is talking about Tsukasa! Hmm…interesting.

Dr Stone’s ED…never in my life did I think it was going to be a rap song. Unless, of course, it’s a science rap…(There’s hydrogen and helium and lithium, berrylium…uh, I don’t remember the words after that…)

Oh, that next-ep font takes me back…it reminds me of the 90s, where terrible WordArt font like that was everywhere and I had to get by on Lucida Calligraphy.

Fruits Basket 14

Oh, crab meat…these CGI cars look absolutely terrible…

Pay attention to the relationship between Kyo and Kyoko…you people who don’t know about manga!Furuba are in for a real revelation on that front.

Wow, the effects on the flowers are really pretty for the ED…

Cop Craft 2

That OP is just so good…*swoon*

Well…they spelt “Unknown” wrong…on Kei’s phone.

Hmm…I think the insert song was in English.

Astra 3

Oh…something didn’t make sense. It turns out the word the subber is using is “attitude” when it should actually be altitude…

Given 2

Ooh, Haruki does coffee in the OP! I didn’t notice that, since I had to skip it…there’s some kinda suckish buffering on CR, which is why I have to skip as much as I can.

Welp, I’m a pianist. I’m as clueless as any other non-guitar player when it comes to guitars, so I don’t mind the lesson but also don’t need it.

Given this is a BL/yaoi (no pun intended), I think Akihiko and Haruki should pair up…but maybe I’m just going nuts with the shipper glasses here.

“You’re going to have to do something about that soon.”

Aye…I relate, Mafuyu. When you’re younger, you can beg your parents for money, but equipment, books etc. really costs some hard cash. I remember having to go to Hong Kong to find a pearl pink metronome on the cheap…the poor thing isn’t getting much use now. (But still, I think the more I watch and see Haruki in action, the more I like him. Not necessarily as a husbando, but more in the sense of that one cool dude you gravitate towards.)

It randomly cut to Salon Harusame…don’t tell me this is how Haruki gets his money???

I think the comment that said “lolol” actually had 超 in front of it, so that would be “super lololol” or, in my personal way of saying it, “major lololol”.

Oh, so that’s what was in the OP!

I swear Uesama (LOL) should just get a job as a guitar tutor to little kids…well, that would work if he were in college/uni, maybe.

Hey, a girl! Didn’t expect one in a BL work…(LOL, my standards are so low for BL/yaoi, eh?)

Hmm…I get the feeling amateurs get their hands on acoustic models instead. I know a guitar player, y’know (although again, that doesn’t mean I know the first thing about playing a guitar).

I love how the show turned green all of a sudden. The colours match the mood, basically.

Demon Slayer 16  

This episode’s titlecard only has a wave pattern…I probably know what the pattern is called, but I’ve…probably forgotten that name.

Hey, a Demon Slayer girl! (My standards seem to have been lowered in regards to seeing gals in leading or even supporting roles…It’s more acceptable for Demon Slayer, given its historical setting, but still, how sad it is to not see many girls…)

(TW: abuse) Why…for some reason, this feels like an abusive household, specifically where the father does evil things to the mother…but this time, the son’s part of the problem.

I find it funny Zenitsu just calls Inosuke “Wild Boar”. To be fair though, I don’t think Inosuke introduced himself to Zenitsu, way back when they were meant to.

This scene where Zenitsu is crying and has his back turned to the “camera”…they clearly used a CGI model for him.

It’s a BODY! Holy s(BLEEP)!

“Chu-Chu chuuuuun!” Oh my glob, Ukogi is so adorable~!

Hey…where was Ukogi hiding before he chose to come out again?

Another CGI model when Zenitsu walks away from the camera. It’s so dark, nobody can see Ukogi…I don’t think he has a CGI model and that’s good.

I had a weird thought, but…I think Tanjiro would be a good breakdancer, if he were living in 2019.

Inosuke, you did it! But I wonder if those stats are correct and Inosuke’s going to call his name properly at climactic moments…?

Cop Craft 3

Brother Kenny…you’re just lewd.

“…O or V or A.” – Aside from OVAs, hmm…O would be (CENSORED), V I don’t know about and A…I don’t know either, but I guess it’s (CENSORED).

Kei Manoba (sic).

Doreany seems to be humanity…Did they already introduce that? I forget.

This show looks pretty bad, but the story makes the stay worth it.