#why do you think im not doing ffxivwrite?

[hqmillioncorn]

Dragons are real?!

“Eh?” Babycorn must not have heard right. For some reason everyone was talking about ‘Voidsents'.’ Apparently they did something really bad that everyone’s scared of. And for some reason everyone looked really worried about it too. Sure, the things they supposedly did sounded scary.  If circumstances were any different, Babycorn would probably be crying.  But she knew better.  Voidsent didn’t exist. They were just a story her mama told her about sometimes. Didn’t everyone else know that? Why didn’t anyone else know that?

ffxiv write day 14: telling

with @windupnamazu 's lunya and @windupiceheart vertical

babycorn thinks its weird that the people shes traveling with believe in things that clearly dont exist. are they dumb or something?

The floor under Chelinka let out a loud whine, as she continued to jump on it over and over. The sound was starting to get annoying at this point but there was nothing stopping Chelinka from checking up on her new little brother. Even if he was still inside his egg at this point. “Yuri! Are you there Yuri?!”

There was no answer. Probably because she was talking to an egg but a response would have been nice.

“Yuri!! It’s me! Your big sister!” Chelinka waved her arms in the air so he could see her more easily. She jumped again, only this time she didn’t land back on the floor. “Uwah!” Her legs were dangling in the air. She moved them around just like she was running. “Mama look! I’m flying!” 

Thankfully for Chelinka’s parents this was not the case. Not again. Instead it was Cocorn that had caught her mid-air. “Careful! It’s bedtime so we don’t want to wake your little brother up!” Only one of those statements was a lie. It was bedtime but it was mostly Chelinka herself that her parents were worried about. 

It was notoriously hard to get her to sleep. It had become even harder with how excited she was to see her little brother hatch. 

“Papa, did you hear him!?” Chelinka wiggled her legs excitedly in the air, “Yuri said goodnight to us! I heard him!” 

“I did!” He had not. Surely Chelinka didn’t really hear anything. Probably just her overactive imagination. Like when she said she saw someone in the bushes last week. 

Elelote and Cocorn hadn’t taken their daughter saying something like that lightly. They took every precaution to make sure there was no one watching her. They had been on the lookout since then and had taken up measures to try and scare anyone from even getting near their home. 

It wasn’t easy but both agreed that it was worth it to keep their children safe.

Cocorn carried the very excited Chelinka over to the bed, ready to at least try and tuck her in. “But papa! I’m not sleepy! I wanna talk with Yuri some more!” She wriggled and wiggled around as hard as she could. “You can talk more in the morning! I promise!” Cocorn sat Chelinka down on the bed and stepped back as she crawled all over it. 

“But I wanna talk nooow” Chelinka whined. 

Elelote sat up from where she was lying down and wrapped her arms around Chelinka, pulling her down with her. “I think it’s past someone’s bedtime!” Chelinka let out a happy squeal. “Not mine! Not mine!” She turned around to give her mom a hug, “Mama I don’t wanna sleep!”

“Hmm…What if we make you a really yummy breakfast tomorrow?”

Chelinka’s eyes widened, “Like chocolate cornbread?!” 

“Like chocolate cornbread!”

“Yipppeee!” Chelinka tumbled back onto the bed in a cheer. “I’ll go to sleep right now!” 

Chelinka laid down on her pillow and closed her eyes. “ZZZZZZ” She said very loudly. It would convince almost everyone that she was sleeping. She was sure of it. 

“Finally…” Elelote yawned. It had been a very long day of selling produce and walking around.

The silence was short lived however. Though Chelinka’s desire to talk with her new baby brother was seemingly forgotten, there was still a little bit more she wanted to say. Chelinka grabbed a blanket and pulled it over her. “Oh! Mama! Papa! Today I saw something again!” She had forgotten to mention it until now. 

Both parents were well used to this. Usually when Chelinka said she was ready for bed that was never really the end of it. “Okay sweetie–what did you see today?” Elelote asked, expecting to hear something trivial like Chelinka spotting a butterfly or another sabotender waving at her from the window. 

Instead.

“I saw a biiiiiig flying thingy in the sky! With super big wings!!” 

Elelote and Cocorn froze.

“Or maybe it was really small? It was in the sky! Flying like-! Woosh!!”

Cocorn was the most nervous about this. He could feel Elelote’s gaze on him, she was most likely even more worried. “You don’t say sweetie…” He was looking away from his wife and daughter. Surely Chelinka wasn’t talking about what he thought she was thinking of. 

“Yeah! Yeah! It was way up in the sky! Doing circles over the house!” Chelinka wiggled her hands in the air. “It was kinda scary but for some reason I wasn’t scared! I knew it was okay!” 

Panic began to set in. 

Cocorn looked down at his daughter. The first thing anyone would notice about her was her large tail that trailed behind her. It was almost as big as her. The second thing someone would notice would be the small horns on her head. Unlike her tail, those would get bigger. 

“Well sweetie, that’s called a dragon and they don’t exist!” 

For the first few seconds Chelinka was quiet. Probably because she was thinking about what her dad had just told her. “They’re not real?” 

“Nope! No such thing as a dragon! Haha!” Probably not the smartest thing to say but it was the only thing he could think of. Maybe someday in the future he could tell Chelinka the truth but for today, this would be it. 

Chelinka blinked, then wagged her tail from side to side. 

“Okay!” Then Chelinka fell backwards and started to pretend she was asleep once again. “I’m sleeping! Mama! Papa! I’m sleeping!” 

Cocorn sighed in relief. He could just imagine the future scenario where he would admit that the dragon that Chelinka saw was actually him, making sure that there was no one near the home. At the time it had been his turn to scout the house while Elelote sold their products. 

“Also-!” Elelote cut in.

By now Chelika had actually fallen asleep. Both her parents could tell because she was clinging onto her blanket and chewing on it. 

“Chelinka! Sweetie are you listening? There’s also no such thing as a voidsent! Chelinka? Chelinka did you hear me?!” 

Cocorn laid a hand on Elelote’s shoulder, whispered in her ear. “Dear…I think she’s already asleep…” 

“...Voidsent don’t exist eitherrrr…!!” Elelote cried.

Thankfully for the both of them, the message went through.

Cherrypit picked up some snow from the ground and stuffed it in his mouth. So far Coerthas was proving to be a really fun place! Way funner than the last place they stayed at. 

He was having fun, unlike a certain someone else. 

“Why d-does it have to be so cold?!” 

Another cold wind blew Babycorn’s way, almost knocking her down to the ground. “Brr…!” She pulled her robe down as much as she could. It was the only thing protecting her from the cold. Aside from the new boots she swiped from a haunted manor. 

Lunya watched Babycorn shivering. She herself was covered head to toe in the warmest and fluffiest coat one could buy. It was incredibly uncomfortable. “You’re the one who decided to come to Coerthas wearing the shortest robe known to man.” 

“Oh yeah?!” Truthfully Babycorn didn’t have anything to say back. She had said that hoping that she could come up with something while saying it. It took a couple of seconds of looking around in a panic until she figured out what to say. It was too cold for her to smirk so all she did was point at B’ig Nunh with a shaky hand. “W-What about B’ig DUMB over there?! He’s got nothing covering his legs either!”

It was very true that B’ig Nunh was wearing pretty much nothing but a suit of armor with nothing but a pair of shoes covering his lower half. But unlike Babycorn he seemed to be faring rather well. Aside from the strange rattling coming from the armor. 

“Well at least he’s not complaining.” Lunya scoffed, “Which is more than I can say about a certain SOMEONE.” 

“I’m not complaining!” 

“YOU WERE LITERALLY COMPLAINING!”

“NUH-UH!!” 

At this point everyone knew the drill. Vertical wasted no time and grabbed Babycorn, carrying her somewhere far away from Lunya. Meanwhile, Reese was the one to grab Lunya and carry her somewhere far away from Babycorn. 

Both girls would just continue arguing to the ends of the world if they were left together. 

Alphinaud and Cid walked in just in time to see Vertical juggling Babycorn in her hands. Trying her best not to let Babycorn bite her. After all, she could have rabies or something, “hello alphinaud.” She greeted him.

“H-Hello Vertical.” 

Alphinaud quickly walked past her and Babycorn to meet with the others. 

With their attention turned to him he began explaining what exactly they would have to do once they got to the stone vigil. Almost all of it flew over Babycorn’s head. She didn’t really care for much of what Alphinaud’s talked about either way. 

Cherrypit liked all the funny words he said.

Babycorn was happy to keep ignoring Alphinaud–until a certain word tickled her ear. 

“Wait a second!” Babycorn wriggled her way out of Vertical’s hands. Vertical just let them drop to the ground and walked behind her. “What did you just say?!” She stood right in front of him, staring him down. It probably would have been intimidating coming from anyone that wasn’t Babycorn.

“Erm.” Alphinaud stammered. The last word he had said. He was having trouble remembering it. He wasn’t particularly scared of Babycorn, but he preferred not getting his hand bitten again. “I believe I said something about a dragon?” 

“Ah-ha!” Babycorn raised a finger in the air, “That’s what I thought you said!” 

Things weren’t getting any clearer for Alphinaud. “Yes? What about it?”

The weather might have been cold but it wasn’t too cold for Babycorn to look smug. “Heh. Oh my dear young Alphinaud. How ignorant you are.” She shook her head, teeth chattering, 

“I didn’t know Babycorn knew words that big.” Coco whispered. 

“Excuse me?!” Alphinaud was a little insulted, He had been doing all this work to help the others and he was called ignorant as a result of it. “Well then–pray tell me what exactly is so ignorant about what I said?!” He had his doubts that Babycorn had even been listening at all. Babycorn didn’t listen to him back at the church, so what was so different now?

“Silly Alphinaud. Don’t you know dragons don’t exist.” 

Nobody knew what to say. The Ishgardian knights around them–even more confused. Everything and everyone was silent, save for the sound of the wind around them and the sound of Cherrypit chewing on a stick. 

“Right.” Alphinaud turned back to everyone else. “As I was saying…”

[superfluouskeys]

AO3 fic stats meme!

tagged by @thevikingwoman !

rules: give us the links to your fics with the most hits, second most kudos, third most comments, fourth most bookmarks, fifth most words, and fic with the fewest words.

Most Hits: The Prisoner | Sleeping Beauty (1959) | Maleficent/Aurora | should technically probably be M rated but idk it's a very high T | 250k words

Did not need to check LOL

Second Most Kudos: THE PRISONER LOL

Songbird actually has more kudos than Prisoner! This is extremely funny, do not read the prisoner it is not fit for human consumption

Third Most Comments: luminescence | Final Fantasy XIV | Various ships, various ratings, written for FFXIVWrite | 72.6k words total

Absolutely bless the ppl who read my slow descent into madness when I did FFXIVWrite--that's one of those times where I can really see a huge improvement in my writing after that month!

Fourth Most Bookmarks: IM SCREAMING. IT'S THE PRISONER [DRAFT 2]

DO NOT READ THE PRISONER.

Fifth Most Words: Songbird | Sleeping Beauty (1959) | Maleficent/Aurora | T | 39.5k words

This is a much saner fic than the Prisoner, and I'm extremely proud of the ending especially. It has some style issues in the beginning and middle just bc it took a long time to write.

Fewest Words: never meant to fall | Once Upon A Time | Ursula/Cruella, referenced Regina/Emma | rated G for whatever reason | 536 words

I forgot about this one LOL, I was thinking it would be one of my short Dragon Age fills that's around 700 words. I also don't know why this has so many hits I sincerely doubt it's very good.

please i am so serious if you're like hm ik she writes fic i wonder if i should try reading any of it, PLEASE, do not start with the prisoner it is literally just 250k words of trauma processing sdknjfnjkkjnfknjf

Tagging: @thepapernautilus @eemamminy-art @yourlocaldisneyvillain @quinnthebard @delirious-comfort if you want to! i cannot think of anyone else I know who writes fic off the top of my head pls feel free to do the thing and pretend I tagged you!

[placesyoucallhome]

★ - sad headcanon

“Why do you keep coming back?” 

He looked over, from his chair in the rickety conjurer’s guild infirmary, next to the woman staring back with her one unswollen eye. She really only ever seemed to have one look about her-- angry, or as much as she could emote that through bandages and bruises, and he couldn’t blame her, she was hardly in any good position, at least from her point of view. 

The calamity has come and gone, they had both weathered the storm, clinging to threads of life and whatever tatters of self they had left, it had been happenstance they’d ended up in makeshift cots next to each other. There was little rhyme or reason to organization, other than severity of wounds, they lay amongst brass blades and yellow adders and more alike, any and every body was picked up, to bind or to bury. He couldn’t remember much of the first days, the subsequent weeks a mess of wavering visions and uncontrolled shuddering, the waves of numbness were almost a comfort, conjury made it worse, but a scholar’s touch seemed to ebb the tides of of what felt like drowning insanity enough to let him heal. 

It had started with her complaining. Of his crying, his yelling, his garbled murmuring, when he was doing no such thing, catching him in a moment of lucidity, she’d been able to tell him the truth where healers had lied to spare him. He wasn’t sure from what, there had been little more embarrassing than his state as it was. 

“I miss your sparkling personality” He smirked, half slumped over on her cheap cot from  the chair he’d dragged over beside, and all she could do was huff about it. 

“Liar.” 

“Reminds me of home.” 

“Some home you have then.” 

“Think that may go for the both of us.” 

She sighed, apparently no quips left to dispute that, they both knew damn well the quarrel with the other, and how little it seemed to matter in the end. “Then why don’t you go home little kitten?” 

“Will you? Can you?” 

Her hard stare cracked, the fear and sadness underneath flickering through for a moment before she could tear her eyes away. “I think we both know I’ll not be leaving this tent in anything more than a bag.” 

He shook his head, “No, I got better, I got better despite now apparently being insane, You’ll heal, you’ll heal and we can--”

“They won’t waste their healing on such as me, we both know that.” Shaky hands crawled up to her neck, still bandaged and bound, but what must have been her last dredges of energy for the day used to shuffle a necklace from under the replacement rags that clothed her, struggling enough to unlatch it that he reached over to do so for her. She grabbed his hand before it left, pushing the simple stamped metal pendant into his hand. “And I won’t be allowed home, tainted as I am. But should the war break, should you ever find yourself so far away--” 

“We’ll both go, we can wait for--” 

“Promise me! Promise me to keep it.”

He swallowed back the lump in his throat, “I promise. Until you ask for it back.” 

“Hmp, fine enough.” She grumbled, laying back into the flat cot. It wasn’t long until her stamina failed her again, between quiet murmurs of bickering between them, and though he had the sick feeling he should stay, he was rather beaten away with a broom by one of the young conjurers after the sun fell. He’d be back in the morning, he gave another promise, though she could no longer hear him. 

Her cot was empty by sunrise. 

“She was gone before daybreak,” The elezen woodwailer grimaced down at the moonkeeper with the disdain he remembered from the shroud, but he’d been the first soul he saw to ask, “To think we should waste limited resources on loyal garlean soldiers over our own, tch, go rummage through the shallow graves if you care.” 

It wasn’t the first time he’d been kicked out of camp for assaulting another troop, it would be his last. 

They could not go home, even if he snuck in to the rows of shallow graves for the soldiers left behind, would he be able to find her? All that was left was the necklace, Perdita oen Antal embossed into the cheap metal. And for the first time since the fighting began, since the gods forsook them, since he realized he could no longer trust his own mind, he sat on the edge of the destruction that broke them, and mourned.

[fistsoflightning]

stories you want to write...

...but for some reason haven’t yet.

tagged by: @to-the-voiceless​!!! thank you cyan for giving me the opportunity to dump out my slightly dusty idea doc onto everyone’s dash sdgsndfnsdfn

tagging: hmmm... @windupnamazu​ (double tag yes yes) @whitherliliesbloom​ @windup-dragoon​ @heirsofdiscord​ @ancientechos​ and you! as you can see, i like fic concepts >:3c

1) okay, so. there’s a section of my idea doc that’s labeled ‘azim steppe shenanigans’ because i Can and Will rewrite as much of the azim steppe MSQ as i please including characterization (yes i’m looking at magnai) ANYWAYS. top idea of the list, which is also the one i want to write The Most, is the naadam duty rewrite! catch me on the ‘why is the wol the khagan of a land they probably don’t even belong to’ train, more news on how zaya and oktai beat up hien at 11. or whenever i get around to writing it since it has Combat and i’m. not the best at it. honorable mentions to the pre-canon sadu, magnai, and zaya tearing through bardam’s mettle fic and the solar eclipse remix that i don’t currently have the energy for ;W; sorry oktai and magnai you’ll have to reside in “are we actually. dating.” hell for a bit longer

2) second on this list is the ‘ysayle lives’ fic!!! honestly there is a whole ass series sitting in my idea doc that also includes moenbryda, papalymo, and maaaybe bad-end flavored minfilia lives? but the ysayle one is like. 60% done but i need to trash and restart since i don’t. like it that much. highlights include: ysayle but a little more dragon flavored, separation of iceheart vs. ysayle, and gratuitous earth imagery versus the ice of coerthas

oh god okay im sticking the rest under a cut this got. Long

3) there is also a section of my doc labeled ‘angst elie isn’t allowed to have as a treat’ because at this point all of mom squad deserves to swing a bat straight for my head, buuut the idea i’m looking at is lightwarden au related! funtimes. ehsk al, anyone? (yes that means either promised love or love’s promise in dragonspeak. yes there’s a reason for this.) the line keeping this idea’s spot is: “ thancred climbs up mt. gulg one final time to meet the mourning dragon.” :)))

4) i want to go more into the various different cultures of my wols!!! i detest the lack of ala mhigan lore (monk lore too. i’m Salty about SB) which is why i haven’t gone into dewah’s family that much but i have an idea and some minor worldbuilding in the making? there’s also lumelle, whose emotions on ishgard are (as all emotions are) complicated, and zaya, who hasn’t been home in a literal decade give or take. i have to think real hard for it tho sdgnsdfsd that’s why they’ve been collecting dust for months.

4.1) the amount of hrothgar and viera lore is also criminal. don’t make me homebrew more lore squeenix give us Actual Lore. duscha and valdis deserve More.

5) okay i. i am very embarrassed by this but i have a longfic draft for a fic that at this point legally has to be tagged “slow burn, if by slow burn you mean 18 years” whenever i finish enough to be able to start posting it and YES ITS ZAYA AND THANCRED. 

yeah. i know. this has been haunting me since ffxivwrite last year-ish. it is also very D U S T Y but it has about 15 different ideas i’ve just mass dumped into it and i despise it and myself. additionally some ardbert feelings slipped into the SHB bits and i’m. maybe unrequited ardbert/zaya.... mayhaps

6) i love carbuncles and i love dt’s writing about the carbuncles which may have led to the thought bunny “what if: black opal carbuncle for zaya’s nameday” and it has haunted me but since zaya’s nameday in real time was a day off from the 5.3 drop it promptly got buried under all the ideas i got from 5.3

7) SPEAKING OF 5.3 CONTENT: carmela predicted correctly that i would like the ‘you’re a long way from home, moogle’ interaction you get if you choose the option that has kupo when talking with thancred and i’m possessed. i want to write something surrounding zaya’s honorary postmoogle title and thancred finding out they spent three weeks delivering eorzea’s mail.... there’s a bunch of canon rewrites but for multiple WOLs i’d like to do but i’m Tired

8) rhmrhrr.... AU time! main street au is still haunting my bones and i want to write more because mom squad spent like. an hour talking about how it’s just like dime store romance fiction amassed into an entire au and there’s a certain flowershop romance i need to write >:3 there’s also the ol’ CHB AU hanging around Somewhere and a very small part of me that craves to keep writing hanahaki au which is just slowburn 2.0

9) OH WAIT. i have Exactly One idea that’s mostly npc-based which is just me having feelings about the going-ons of norvrandt before the WOL is summoned, mostly revolving around ryne/baby-filia which i think? will have four parts? it’s really just me worldbuilding with norvrandt and having a great time. i scribbled down a beginning to try and shake off some rust (it did not really work) but:

10) honorable mention goes to the ‘zaya, thancred, and co. give ryne a nameday celebration despite her not really having a nameday’ idea and to this, which never fails to give me a chuckle when i read it in my idea doc:

[windupnamazu]

happy heavensturn, everyone!  give yourself a pat on the back! we’ve made it! 🎊

this was a loooooong year, and of course it had its ups and downs. my mental healths been splotchy at times, i had to cut ties with someone who i used to think of as a really good friend, i realized a lot of the opinions i was parroting were at best thoughtless and at worst flat-out hurtful, and i was surrounding myself with people who were contributing more to overall misery than happiness - but ive also come out of my shell far more rapidly in the last four months of this year than i have in many of the years before. im ending it on a good note!

this blog wasnt very active until september when ffxivwrite started and i learned how to make gifs, and since then i made some stuff i hated but i also made a lot of stuff i really liked, and i know ive grown from it, and i know im going to continue growing!! ive never made this much for one fandom in such a short period before - im usually a person who makes one thing and then goes quiet - but every moment of running this blog and interacting with new people these past few months has been incredibly fun and ive been learning so much!! sometimes i do think “i need to make more!” and then ill remember that one week i made a gifset everyday for six straight days, and i think “wow! why did i do that. geez.” im happy with what ive managed to do in spite of everything else on my plate, and i hope my friends will be happy with what theyve managed to do too!!

and speaking of friends!! ive made so many new friends this year and theyre all absolutely incredible and so talented!! im a very anxious and shy person and talking to new people directly is terrifying for me, but im slowly becoming more confident and comfortable!! slowly!!! (i went through one week where i talked to a new person Every Single Day and i was so overwhelmed by the time it was over ahndsdfgnn)

ive also been making an effort to be more vocal so i hope no ones been bothered by how often i reblog and tag things here?? snfndfnhgnh its not something i do a lot on my personal because i have. um. four times the follower count and im super selfconscious about saying something stupid but my friends have made SO many good things i just gotta yell about all of it!! please let content creators know how much you love their stuff, because they really deserve it!  

to mutuals and followers both - know that i love you! and im so, so, so proud of you for making it through this year and for making great things! thank you so much for all your support!!

happy holidays and happy new year, and goodbye to this decade! heres to an even greater one! 🎉🎉🎉

[deathflares]

» ffxivwrite day #22 — argy-bargy

wolexarch, very briefly hinted thanuri, 930 words, T.

note: this is an immediate sequel to matter of fact, and though it can be read as a standalone, you may want to read that one for context.

[ao3 mirror]

"Cussing, angry Shiori is usually eight drinks Shiori,” says Alphinaud, “but this… particular type is one I'm not yet familiar with, I'm afraid."

"How do you know this," Alisaie asks. Alphinaud's expression immediately goes vacant, the look in his eyes not unlike what G'raha has seen in soldiers after actual wars. He doesn't answer. Alisaie doesn't ask again.

The party has mostly dispersed by the time the children leave G’raha alone, now with some extra braids in his hair and a flower crown over his head that he feels is mildly embarrassing but can’t really bring himself to remove either way. He sits by one of the furthermost tables in the area that Shiori had retired to and now all the Scions are lounging about and nurses his stale, lukewarm glass of wine, feeling too tipsy to care.

Shiori and Thancred are still dancing—or not so much dancing as they’re flailing about and laughing like children, which is pretty amusing to watch, if a little uncharacteristic. He buries the part of him that feels jealous, seals it in a box and ships the box off to the Empty, then lets himself just sit there and enjoy the atmosphere. Peace, at last—what an odd thought it is. For so long he had pictured this day, but never had he dared to imagine he would live to see it. Yet here he stands, alive and well, the Sin Eaters gone and the Eight Umbral Calamity prevented, dwelling in dangerous thoughts of maybe, maybe being free to do what he truly wants to do, from now on.

So absorbed in such thoughts, he fails to notice an approaching, drunk menace, thoughts coming to a halt only when she’s already standing—or rather, wobbling—right in front of him.

“Exarrrch,” she slurs.

G’raha blinks. It takes that exact amount of time for her to throw herself into his lap, hands gripping the collar of his robes. Her cheeks are flushed and her breath smells like ale and by the gods she’s too close. G’raha’s hands automatically land on her hips to catch her, mind going blank.

“M… My friend—”

“G’raha Tia,” she says, “you,” jabs a finger on his chest, “are a fucking idiot.”

“Uh,” G’raha answers eloquently. Somewhere behind them, Thancred laughs. Alisaie eyes them with an expression that can only be described as disgust, and takes a very long chug of her ale.

“I can’t believe you were going to—get yourself killed for my sake,” she mutters, “that you dared hide yourself from me and pretend you didn’t know what I was talking about when I asked about you, right to your face—”

He swallows. “I truly am s—”

“Shut up,” she growls, “I’m not done.”

G’raha looks around for someone, anyone who might help him in this time of need, but the Scions are either watching with barely concealed amusement (Y’shtola, Urianger), definitely not concealed amusement (Thancred), barely concealed horror (Alisaie, Ryne), or quiet resignation (Alphinaud). G’raha accepts his fate.

“You think you’re so smart, with your schemes and your half-truths and—” she pulls at his hood, bringing his head dangerously close to her chest which, okay, “your stupid cowl? If you had actually died I swear to all the gods I would have found a way to bring you back so I could kill you myself—”

Shiori proceeds to yell at him for several minutes, and G’raha sits in silence as she tells him in about sixty-three different ways how much of an idiot he is. Briefly, a part of him wonders if he actually enjoys being berated like this—which, granted, might be a bit of a dangerous thought to have when her hips are hovering so close to his loins.

“And that one time back in Mor Dhona when you got that disgusting slime all over my robes because you decided to go off by yourself and fight two morbols at once and I had to go rescue you, you im—imbe—”

“Imbecile,” G’raha suggests.

“You imbecile—”

Ryne fidgets, looking equal parts amazed and terrified. “Um,” she says, “is she—usually like this? When she’s drunk?”

"Cussing, angry Shiori is usually eight drinks Shiori,” says Alphinaud, “but this… particular type is one I'm not yet familiar with, I'm afraid."

"How do you know this," Alisaie asks. Alphinaud's expression immediately goes vacant, the look in his eyes not unlike what G'raha has seen in soldiers after actual wars. He doesn't answer. Alisaie doesn't ask again.

“I do believe someone ought to give our friend some respite,” Y’shtola says, though she makes no move to do so herself. “I’d say he has suffered quite enough.”

Shiori turns. “And you,” she snarls, pointing at Urianger, “if you lie to me again, I swear I’ll make your arse as flat as those cards of yours, Thancred’s laments be damned—”

“Alright,” says Thancred, suddenly very intent on getting Shiori to stop talking, “I think that’s quite enough, my friend.”

“No,” Shiori says, still comfortably sat on G’raha’s lap, “I have words for all of you—except you, Ryne, you’re an angel and I love you—”

“I… have to agree, my friend,” Alphinaud interjects, “that’s enough argy-bargy for one day, I’d say.”

“What the fuck is argy-bargy, Alphinaud,” Shiori deadpans. Alisaie cackles.

She does, eventually, get off his lap, after a couple minutes of insistence from the twins and some stumbling. He sighs and drinks what remains of his wine in a single gulp when she does.

“Feeling alright?” Thancred asks, moving to sit next to G’raha and offering his own half-full bottle of wine to him.

“I’ve been better,” G’raha answers, pouring himself a new glass.

Thancred laughs. “Don’t you worry, my friend,” he says. “There’s plenty more of that, ah, fire in her. I’m sure you’ll be able to coax it out eventually.”

Thancred leaves then, still laughing, leaving G’raha to choke on his wine and wonder why the gods have chosen to torment him so.