#wonka
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Timothée Chalamet as Willy Wonka in Wonka (2023)
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Wonka Sour Apple Laffy Taffy
2007
Found on Ebay, seller rusvan
#willy wonka#sour apple#laffy taffy#2007#early 2000s candy#early 2000s laffy taffy#vintage wonka#wonka#vintage laffy taffy#apple#green#early 2000s nostalgia#early 2000s kids#early 2000s childhood#early 2000s#candy#taffy#y2k nostalgia#y2k kids#y2k childhood#y2k laffy taffy#y2k candy#y2k
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Watching Juicy from a West End boot and WHY is Violet's dad so happy about any of this. It'd make sense if he just kept thinking of fame but those oompas are talking about selling his daughter's body parts and bro's still so giddy
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I have been on a Willy Wonkified journey today and I need y'all to come with me
It started so innocently. Scrolling Google News I come across this article on Ars Technica:
At first glance I thought what happened was parents saw AI-generated images of an event their kids were at and became concerned, then realized it was fake. The reality? Oh so much better.
On Saturday, event organizers shut down a Glasgow-based "Willy's Chocolate Experience" after customers complained that the unofficial Wonka-inspired event, which took place in a sparsely decorated venue, did not match the lush AI-generated images listed on its official website.... According to Sky News, police were called to the event, and "advice was given."
Thing is, the people who paid to go were obviously not expecting exactly this:

But I can see how they'd be a bit pissed upon arriving to this:

It gets worse.
"Tempest, how could it possibly--"
source of this video that also includes this charming description:
Made up a villain called The Unknown — 'an evil chocolate maker who lives in the walls'
There is already a meme.
Oh yes, the Wish.com Oompa Loompa:
Who has already done an interview!
As bad (and hilarious) as this all is, I got curious about the company that put on this event. Did they somehow overreach? Did the actors they hired back out at the last minute? (Or after they saw the script...) Oddly enough, it doesn't seem so!
Given what I found when poking around I'm legit surprised there was an event at all. Cuz this outfit seems to be 100% a scam.
The website for this specific event is here and it has many AI generated images on it, as stated. I don't think anyone who bought tickets looked very closely at these images, otherwise they might have been concerned about how much Catgacating their children would be exposed to.
Yes, Catgacating. You know, CATgacating!
I personally don't think anyone should serve exarserdray flavored lollipops in public spaces given how many people are allergic to it. And the sweet teats might not have been age appropriate.
Though the Twilight Tunnel looks pretty cool:
I'm not sure that Dim Tight Twdrding is safe. I've also been warned that Vivue Sounds are in that weird frequency range that makes you poop your pants upon hearing them.
Yes, Virginia, these folks used an AI image generator for everything on the website and used Chat GPT for some of the text! From the FAQ:
Q: I cannot go on the available days. Will you have more dates in the future? A: Should there be capacity when you arrive, then you will be able to enter without any problems. In the event that this is not the case, we may ask you to wait a bit.
Fear not, for this question is asked again a few lines down and the answer makes more sense.
Curious about the events company behind this disaster, I took myself over to the homepage of House of Illuminati and I was not disappointed.
I would 100% trust these people to plan my wedding.
This abomination of a website is a badly edited WordPress blog filled with AI art and just enough blog posts to make the casual viewer think that it's a legit business for about 0.0004 seconds.
Their attention to detail is stunning, from how they left up the default first post every WP blog gets to how they didn't bother changing the name on several images, thus revealing where they came from. Like this one:
With the lovely and compact filename "DALL·E-2024-01-30-09.50.54-Imagine-a-scene-where-fantasy-and-reality-merge-seamlessly.-In-the-foreground-a-grand-interactive-gala-is-taking-place-filled-with-elegant-guests-i.png"
"Concept.png" came from the same AI generator that gets text almost, but not quiiiiiite right:
There are a suspicious number of .webp images in the uploads, which makes me think they either stole them from other sites where AI "art" was uploaded or they didn't want to pay for the hi-res versions of some and just grabbed the preview image.
The real fun came when I noticed this filename: Before-and-After-Eventologists-Transformation-Edgbaston-Cricket-Ground-1024x1024-1.jpg and decided to do a Google image search. Friends, you will be shocked to hear that the image in question, found on this post touting how they can transform a boring warehouse into a fun event space, was stolen from this actual event planner.
Even better, this weirdly grainy image?
From a post that claims to be about the preparations for a "Willy Wonka" experience (we'll get to this in a minute), is not only NOT an actual image of anyone preparing anything for Illuminati's event, it is stolen from a YouTube thumbnail that's been chopped to remove the name of the company that actually made this. Here's the video.
If you actually read the blog posts they're all copypasta or some AI generated crap. To the point where this seems like not a real business at all. There's very specific business information at the bottom, but nothing else seems real.
As I said, I'm kinda surprised they put on an event at all. This has, "And then they ran off with all our money!" written all over it. I'm perplexed.
And also wondering when the copyright lawyers are gonna start calling, because...

This post explicitly says they're putting together a "Willy Wonka’s Chocolate Factory Experience" complete with golden tickets.
Somewhere along the line someone must have wised up, because the actual event was called "Willys Chocolate Experience" (note the lack of apostrophe) and the script they handed to the actors about 10 minutes before they were supposed to "perform" was about a "Willy McDuff" and his chocolate factory.
As I was going through this madness with friends in a chat, one pointed out that it took very little prompting to get the free Chat GPT to spit out an event description and such very similar to all this while avoiding copyrighted phrases. But he couldn't figure out where the McDuff came from since it wasn't the type of thing GPT would usually spit out...
Until he altered the prompt to include it would be happening in Glasgow, Scotland.
You cannot make this stuff up.
But truly, honestly, I do not even understand why they didn't take the money and run. Clearly this was all set up to be a scam. A lazy, AI generated scam.
Everything from the website to the event images to the copy to the "script" to the names of things was either stolen or AI generated (aka stolen). Hell, I'd be looking for some poor Japanese visitor wandering the streets of Glasgow, confused, after being jacked for his mascot costume.
HE LIVES IN THE WALLS, Y'ALL.
#long post#Willy Wonka#Wonka#Willy Wonka Experience#Willy Wonka Experience disaster#Willy's Chocolate Experience#Willys Chocolate Experience#THE UNKNOWN#Wish.com Oompa Loompa#House of Illuminati#AI#ai generated
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New Balkan coffee shop at 8am just dropped in Glasgow.
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No Oscar nom for Wonka...academy afraid of wonking? possibly due to woke
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gotta say I'm loving the era hugh grant is in right now. he's daniel craig's domesticated husband. he's a paddington baddie. an oompa loompa. dungeons and dragons. now he's a horror movie villain? honestly good for him
#get him in sonic is all I'm saying#hugh grant#glass onion#paddington#wonka#dungeons and dragons#heretic#my posts#1k
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On the topic of prequels, Willy Wonka could run the Hunger Games but Coriolanus Snow couldn't make chocolate
#willy wonka and the chocolate factory#willy wonka#charlie and the chocolate factory#wonka#hunger games#the ballad of songbirds and snakes#tbosas#coriolanus snow
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WONKA (2023) dir. Paul King
#timothée chalamet#timothee chalamet#tom davis#wonka#willy wonka#filmedit#filmgifs#moviegifs#gifs#~#so much to unpack here
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I know we're all obsessed with the oompa loompa meth lab but I truly can't stop thinking about The Unknown guy. what a character.
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MISTAH WONKA, I'M FUCKIN BALLIN
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💬 i want to wonk your world
💬 can i wonk your world?
💬 i want to wonk your world
💬 time to wonk your world
💬 you ready for me to wonk your world
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timothée chalamet, wonka (2023)
#timothee chalamet#timothée chalamet#timothee chalamet gifs#wonka#wonka 2023#willy wonka#willy wonka gifs#gif#gifs
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: ̗̀➛ Call it what you want to
You're an up-coming star, staring in some hit movies like Hunger games Ballad of songbirds and snakes and now Wonka, along the Timothee Chalamet.
[i'm obsessed with my man and just need to ignore the fact he's dating someone that isn't me. anyway, you're an up-coming actress who stared in the new hunger games movie and now you're also staring in wonka, the people love you and maybe, so does a co-star of yours] not proof read. this was very fun to write so maybe i'll do more, if anyone likes it. or just for me
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liked by... tayrussell, joshandresrivera, tomblyth, sadiesink_, tchalamet & others
yourusername: wonka press tour starts now!
809k likes. 304k comments
user: wait, you're in wonka?!
user: I LOVE YOU!!
user: mother giving us content, as always
tchalamet: now you've posted can you come up and help me
yourusername: no
tchalamet: pls!!!
user: omg she really said no to timothee chalamet, who does she thin she is?
user: slayyyy
user: isn't wonka supposed to suck
tomblyth: from one press tour to another, i see
yourusername: girls got to earn a living
tomblyth: she doesn't let the grass grow
user: say hi to timothee for me!!!!
user: omg how is she getting all the hottest guys in hollywood rn? gurl leave some for us
wonkamovie: 😍😍
balladofsongbirdsandsnakes: 😍😍😍
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you were flicking through comments by your friends when your phone started to ring, the familiar picture of your co-star flicking up on your phone. quickly, you dimissed yourself from your assistant and took the call. 'yes?'
'I need your help.'
'Timothee, you're old enough to zip up your own jacket,' you tease, leaning on the wall.
'I don't know what jumper to wear, what are you wearing? we'll coordinate.'
you'd opted for something of your own style. a jumper with pinks and blues and a white flowering skirt with a ring almost on every finger. this was only your second big press tour and sitting next to timothee chalamet every day for it was enough to make you nervous. so nervous you woke every morning wondering if you'd throw up. it didn't help you were also surrounded by others you'd looked up to, like olivia coleman and hugh grant. how were you supposed to keep your cool for months. even if now you were considered just as big a star.
'don't you have a stylist for this?' you ask, looking at the crew around, ready to go but waiting for him.
'there's three options and i don't know which one to go for. can't you just come up.'
you could, sure. go to timothee's hotel room and see him probably shirtless. once you'd have dreamt of it, but things were different, now you just didn't have a silly celebrity crush. now he was your co-star and very off limits.
'option two now come on, please.' quickly, you end the call and pick up your coffee, heading to the room where you'd be sat for the next eight hours answering questions with timothee.
you were there first, shaking hands with the interviewer and introducing yourself to her. you took your seat, making little chatter before timothee chalamet walked in, calm, cool and collected. completely different to your flushed and smiling expression.
you watched as he quickly said hello to everyone in the room and greeted the lady who'd be conducting the interview.
timothee turned to you, arms out wide and waiting. laughing, you put your coffee down and stood up, giving him a hug. you shared small pleasantries before he took his seat next to you, shuffling around and settling in. only then did you realise how much your jumpers looked the same, both smudges of similar colours. you blushed more as timothee watched, silently wondering what could make you so red. as if he had no idea what he did to you just by sitting down next to him.
'I have had scrub scrub stuck in my head since seeing the movie,' she- charline, said as you and timothee laugh. 'do you guys have a favourite song you got to perform?'
'I mean, pure imagination was quite a surreal experience. you know, getting to sing something that was so ... iconic, it was-it was a lot of fun. and a lot of pressure, but, in a good way,' said timothee.
'you killed it,' you assure, casually.
'thank you,' he smiled.
'i really enjoyed you've never had chocolate like this number. that was just so fun, the dancing and all,' you say, timothee nodding and agreeing.
'for a moment was fun to, i guess,' added timothee. 'we got to dance.'
you grin at the memory. 'we did.' you remembered the a million takes, timothee singing practically to you while prancing around. it was your favourite scene to shoot because it was such an easy and happy scene. you didn't have to think about it, just held timmy's hand as he twirled you around the place.
'and i know we're here to talk about wonka but i just have to say-' she gestured to you, 'congratulations on hunger games, biggest movie in the world.'
you wave her off, thanking her as timmy claps for you. 'thank you, thank you.'
'i was wondering what was your favourite song to film there on that set and how does it compare to singing on this one.'
ranting about yourself or your achievements was always hard for you. your stardom and come so quickly with hunger games and wonka, so much so you felt like you didn't deserve half of it.
'i mean, for hunger games it was all live. i sang them there and then so that's daunting in itself, um. i loved filming pure as the driven snow, just because i got to- essentially- sing it to tom. it was just him and me and the crew, like for those shots there was no extra's so that was great fun. a special moment. and singing it to him made it a whole lot easier. whereas on this movie, luckily it was all like pre-recorded so, not so daunting. didn't have to sing in front of timothee chalamet,' you say.
he listened carefully to you, seeing your smile at mentioning tom blyth, your co-star from the hunger games. he'd never met the guy, he was probably lovely- from the amount you talked about him. 'you've got a great singing voice.'
'thanks man.'
'this cast is just so insane and obviously you two got close during filming,' says charline, gesturing to the two of you.
timothee nudged you with his head, like he'd done a thousand times before knowing how much you secretly loved it. just like a horse, as had been quoted.
'who's more british, olivia or hugh?'
'hugh, easily,' you say. you loved all of hugh's movies, but you'd never say that to his face.
'you know, i'm gonna go and say you,' says timothee, turning to you.
you drop you jaw, pointing to yourself. yes, you were british, but more so than than the hugh grant seemed impossible. 'me?'
'yea, i mean, hugh grant is like a walking union jack- and i mean that in the best way possible, but you seem so much more like british. you know, wicked sense of humor and the charm and- you love london,' he pointed out.
'i do love london,' you agreed.
'did you have fun filming in england, timothee?' she asked.
they want on and on to talk about filming the movie, answering questions in depth and it was sure the two of you had great answers, listening intently together and everyone could tell. your chemistry was there, your smiles and answers together were almost so perfect it was like it was practiced and the fans ate it up!
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liked by... zendaya, mtv, kyliejenner, yourusername, wbpictures & others
tchamalmet: WONKA!!! coming soon
tagged: yourusername
1.1m likes, 609k comments
user: he posted! he posted!
user: we are getting FED
user: i just know this is all yourusername influence
user: not kylie liking...
user: statistics! statistics!
liked by yourusername
yourusername: bring back little timmy tim!
yourusername: out of all the pictures you chose that one
user: anyone else think her and timmy are getting too close
user: like fr she stealin my man
user: i love them!!!
user: i swear something is going on with her and tom blyth
user: she's just like us!
user: LOVE!!!!!
user: her and timmy >>> him and kylie
user: plssss, i love kylie
user: is wonka a musical
user: TIMMY I WANT TO HAVE YOUR CHILDREN!!!
user: fave bob dylan song?
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liked by... tomblyth, rachelzeglar, tchalamet, hunterschafer, zendaya & others
yourusername: ballad of song birds and snakes is number one movie? more like i'm the number one most grateful person out there for this chance and being trusted with my girl lucy-grey!!! thank you, thank you, thank you!!
tagged: tomblyth
1m likes 477k comments
tomblyth: lots of love my dear !
user: pls the second picture was so unncesary she just wanted to post it
user: MOTHER
user: parents are parenting
user: I LOVED THIS FILM
user: tom blyth is honestly so hot like wtf
rachelzeglar: my luv <3
yourusername: omg my gf everybody!!!!
joshandresrivera: funny how you don't post a picture of me
yourusername: it's funny because i don't like you
joshandresrivera: tomblyth you gonna let her talk to me like that??
tomblyth: she's the boss
user: how is she so amazing in everything
user: wonder how she got this job? she's literally as plain as a plank
user: hi!
user: the film was insane, i'm obsessed
user: i need this film injected into my veins
user: she's so good at singing, get her on broadway!!!
tchalamet: very proud
yourusername liked tchalamet's comment
user: why would you post the second pic unless they're clearly dating
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user: pls why do i ship them so hard!!
user: lol it looks like he's just refusing to answer questions without her
user: is nobody gonna talk about how they were basically wearing the same jumpers?
user: no because i thought the exact same thing
user: someone pointed it out in an interview and timothee said it was 100% planned, they're so cute
user: doesn't he have a girlfriend?
user: isn't she with tom blyth? they look like they're together?
user: they haven't confirmed it
user: they don't need to did you see her post on instagram?! it was all just him
user: no but the way she's just constantly blushing around him
user: so would you if you were sat next to the timothee chalamet
#the ballad of songbirds and snakes#timothée chalamet#tom blyth#i need him biblically#timothee x you#wonka 2023#timothee chalamet x reader#timmy#tom blyth x reader#the hunger games#wonka#actress#social media
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#i haven't really been following this Kate Middleton thing properly but it's probably time I did#Kate Middleton#KateGate#Royal Family#British royal family#not a royalist#Willy's Chocolate Experience#Willy Wonka#Charlie and the Chocolate Factory#Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory#Wonka#Glasgow#Scotland
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