#ydom

[ironwoman359]

hey so I had a question and I don't mean to be pushy but...

this fic isn't abandoned is it? because I LOVE it and am eagerly awaiting more. (=

Aw, I’m glad you like it so much!

The thing that happened with You Don’t Own Me (You Don’t Even Know Me) specifically Was that when Lark and I started writing it, we had enough time to do a short one shot but we were both overly ambitious and took the idea into a full-blown chaptered fic. Unfortunately, time eventually caught up to us and we no longer had the time or energy to work on it, and so it hasn’t been updated for over six months. Lark has also let me know in that interim that they are not going to continue writing fanfiction, but has given me free reign to finish up YDOM. As most of my readers have probably noticed, none of my fics have been updated recently, and very little new things have been written, because I’ve just been too busy at/too tired from work to give anything my full attention (iswm stuff took me in a chokehold and made me ignore real responsibilities like cleaning and eating).

BUT! I’m changing jobs in two weeks, and this new one should be much less stressful and time consuming, so I’m hoping to be able to write again in the near future… but I won’t give any exact timelines or anything, because quite frankly, I have no idea when I’ll be able to properly sit down and write again, I’m just hoping it will be sooner rather than later!

[5-falsehoods-phonated]

You Don’t Own Me (You Don’t Even Know Me)

Chapter 5

Summary:  As the son of a Baron, Roman Sanders always knew that when he married, it would be due to a political arrangement rather than true love. Still, when he is sent away to marry an older, more powerful Earl, he is determined to make the best of his situation. Despite the Earl’s indifference towards him, Roman forges ahead and prepares to become the best husband he can possibly be, making new friends along the way. But when his fiancé’s demeanor turns from cold to cruel, Roman must shift all of his focus to survival, and find a way out of his marriage before it’s too late.

Ships: Logince (Logan x Roman)  Moxiety (Virgil x Patton)

Content Warnings: arranged marriage, abuse, attempted sexual assault, murder, poisoning, character death, hurt/comfort, angst

Chapter Warnings: mentions of physical and emotional abuse, murder planning

Word Count: 2490

Read on AO3: here!

Cowritten with @ironwoman359 masterlist

False masterlist

Roman was not used to feeling small.

He was used to standing out, being loud, and carrying his shoulders with a confidence worthy of the title he held and the company he was expected to keep. Wherever he went, he knew he could always hold his head high.

Staring at his reflection now, he had to fight the urge to duck his head. His face was, quite simply, a mess. The cut from Lord Howard’s ring was small enough that Roman didn’t feel the need to bandage it, but the wound was slightly swollen, and his cheek was a truly shocking shade of purple.

Swallowing, Roman picked up a small compact that had been left on his vanity. He wasn’t in the habit of applying makeup, but when the supplies for doing so had appeared in his room overnight, the message he was being sent was quite clear. He wasn’t even sure whether he was sickened or relieved by the act, at this point. In some ways, it felt like another mark of ownership; the earl wanted him as perfect and pristine as ever, no matter what happened. But on the other hand, Roman wasn’t sure if he could stand to walk about the estate with the mark on full display like a brand.

Roman winced as he gingerly applied the powder to his face. It didn’t completely erase the injury’s appearance, but if he added some blush to the other cheek and styled his hair so it hung lower than usual, obscuring the bruise from the side...it was almost enough.

It would have to do for now.

Taking a deep breath, Roman exited his room and quickly made his way through the halls. He’d told Patton that he didn’t feel well this morning (which was not entirely untrue), and so he wasn’t expecting anyone to wonder where he was. After a few turns, he found himself standing before a door that he had never actually gone through before: the door to Logan’s office.

The office’s large door glistened with fresh wood polish and gave a pleasant, welcoming smell, though the scent actually only succeeded in making Roman’s nerves worse. He knew Logan would be on the other side, working on managing this set of numbers or that pile of letters even this early in the morning. Lightly touching the bruise across his cheek he closed his eyes and took a deep breath. It had to be Logan- no one else. He trusted Patton with everything he had, but there was no telling how the loyal attendant would react. He knew Patton cared about him, but as kind and caring as he was, he was hardly a good actor. And Virgil was far from a snitch, but he was so wary of any sign of trouble that Roman didn’t want to burden him with this...at least not yet.

He had to be sure...he had to know he had even half a chance before letting the others in, and to have that chance, he needed Logan.

If Roman listened closely, he could hear him on the other side of the door, muttering softly to himself as he ran through whatever calculations he was scratching out with his favorite pen. Paper rustled every now and then and Roman could tell by the coolness of the hardwood floor just in front of the door that the window must be open. He stood a moment more, letting his mind’s eye follow the thought, picturing Logan’s long hair blowing softly across his shoulders as he sat hunched over his desk, glasses sitting just so on the bridge of his nose that Roman could probably reach forward and straighten them if he was quick enough.

Shaking the thought out of his head, he took a breath and knocked quickly, then without waiting for an answer, pushed the door open before he could lose his nerve.

Logan glanced up from his work, frowning slightly as Roman entered. His eyes widened when he saw Roman, and he stood so quickly that his chair screeched across the floor. Wincing at the sound, he smiled apologetically and gestured for Roman to take the seat in front of him.

“Roman, to what do I owe the pleasure this late in the evening?”

“I-” Roman’s throat ran dry, and his thoughts along with it. Logan was looking at him, worry etched across his brow and work forgotten, and Roman swallowed. “I need your help.”

“Certainly,” Logan said immediately. “How can I assist you?”

Sitting across from Logan now, Roman almost changed his mind. It seemed absurd to think that Logan would agree to what he had in mind...what if he had misjudged him? What if he had misinterpreted the withering looks Logan shot the earl when he thought no one was looking, what if he had placed too much faith in their budding friendship, and if Roman so much as breathed a word of his plan, Logan would be the first to warn Lord Howard?

“Roman? Are you alright?”

Logan’s voice pulled him from his thoughts, and Roman looked up. Logan was sitting patiently, nothing but concern and quiet understanding marking his features, and Roman suddenly didn’t know why he should be worried at all. He could trust this man- he was sure of it.

“I need your help taking control away from Lord Howard.”

Logan binked once, then twice, fiddling with a pen that lay in front of his hands before setting it down firmly and leaning forward. No sound came from his mouth when he opened it at first, snapping it shut to blink a third time, slow and deliberate while he gathered his thoughts. “I’m sorry?”

“I- I need your help, please Logan.” Roman leaned forward as the other man straightened back up, his attention fully caught. “The earl has his fingers in far too many pies...and I’m not even sure he remembers what all the flavors are. If last week's meeting was anything to go by he disregards anything that doesn’t directly benefit him and only him and I’m sure land isn’t the only thing he’s notoriously stubborn with. Look at the way he treats his staff, expecting them up day and night to serve him and his entertainment of the day, extending that to you and all the responsibilities he shoves to the side in his confidence that you’ll pick up the slack. I haven’t even been here for very long but I know you hardly sleep for all the work you do in his stead. He expects everyone around him to be the perfect picture of their roles to mask the fact that he cannot play his own and I cannot continue this betrothal and eventual marriage in a state of constant anxiety and silence. He isn’t...he isn’t a good man Logan.”

Pursing his lips, Logan held up a hand. “Roman, I still don’t know that I understand what you want me-”

“He isn’t a good man, Logan,” Roman interrupted. “You must see that.”

“Yes, but Roman, he- I don’t know what you’re asking of me. He has more power than he knows what to do with, true, and he certainly abuses it, but I’m not certain what you expect me to be able to do about taking it away. I manage his finances and remind him of meetings; I hardly have the reach to do anything substantial.”

“For people like him, money is his power, and you’re the one that takes care of that. How many times does he actually ask you about anything official? Does he ever want full accounts of where anything goes? You sign documents for him of all things because he believes himself too important and you’re going to sit there and say you have no weight to throw?”

“But I-”

Seeing the doubt, Roman was quick to lean forward. “What if we could control the estate? Actually control it, and make smart decisions for it and know what’s going in and out of it? Surely you of all people would jump at the opportunity to make the changes you know need to be made here.”

“Roman.” Logan fixed him with a stern look, and Roman snapped his mouth shut. “It’s a nice thought in theory. I’ve spent many nights worrying over things that truly should not be my responsibility, and have done enough research to present to the earl a myriad of solutions to his problems, should he ever decide he actually wants to listen to my counsel. But for us to be in control of the estate, the earl would have to be deceased.”

Roman stared at him blankly.

Logan’s eyes widened. “Roman that is not-”

Taking a deep breath, Roman brought up a hand to wipe at his face, the flesh colored powder smearing his sleeve to reveal the dark purple and red underneath. This time it was Logan that snapped his mouth shut, with an audible click. Horror, anger and worry flashed across his face, and Roman winced.

“It’s going to get worse. I know it and so do you. This is how it starts, especially once he has someone who officially belongs to him, and especially when that someone doesn’t just lie down and take it. I won’t. And so it will keep getting worse, and he will never be accountable until one of us finally has an accident. I am not going to let that one of us be me.”

Logan regarded him sadly, sighing as he lowered his gaze. “What you’re suggesting is extremely risky. Even if we could do something after you marry him, the fact of the matter is that this is the Howard family’s estate. And I’m sure you’ve figured out by now that the earl isn’t exactly...interested in making you an official member of the family in any capacity. If he were to pass away, the estate wouldn’t be bequeathed to you. You’d still have no control, and might honestly end up with less if his other family members decide not to tolerate your presence.”

“That’s where you come in.” Roman smirked, and Logan’s head snapped up. “I need your help to forge the will.”

--- --- ---

“Well that’s-”

“Excuse me, what?”

Roman fidgeted with his sleeve as Logan attempted to sooth Patton and Virgil long enough to allow them to explain. After getting Logan to agree to help him, Roman had immediately requested that they bring Patton and Virgil into the scheme. Roman was certain he could trust them, and Logan seemed to agree. They certainly wouldn’t be able to pull their plan off with only two of them. Getting Patton and Virgil to see the necessity in it, though...well that was the first hurdle they were trying to clear.

“It seems like a drastic measure to take, even with the lord’s uh...mood as of late.” Patton squirmed on the haystack he was curled up on, pointedly ignoring the baffled expression Virgil threw him.

“A drastic measure? You think? This is treason, Patton! We’ll be hanged!” Virgil turned to glare at the two men across from him. “We will be hanged. There has to be a better way.’

“We will have the will forged and officiated before the wedding, and then arrange it to look like his death was natural. As long as we can figure out a way to do that it’s a fairly simple process.” Logan held his hands in front of him in a pleading gesture. “Even if we can’t find a way to make it look natural, I assure you Lord Howard has enough enemies grabbing at his various businesses and properties that it’d be anyone’s guess who tried killing him off. Half of them would end up paying investigators off just to avoid any public suspicion, it is almost guaranteed that no one would expect Roman to be the culprit.”

Virgil stared at him. “You’ve thought this through. Logan, why have you thought this through?”

Patton reached over and grabbed Virgil’s hand, rubbing soothing motions against his knuckles while humming softly. Virgil’s shoulders remained tense but he leaned against the attendant's shoulder, taking a shuddering breath as he raised his eyes to the ceiling.

“I think...” Patton said slowly. “I think that maybe while we have this opportunity we should take it. Not that I take any pride in using you Roman!” He was quick to assure. “But- I’ve seen the way he gets...and how he is getting. People like that only worsen with age, and I’d rather not see any of us hurt...more.”

Roman touched his cheek self-consciously, trying to subtly cover up the spot where he had wiped the make-up off, but of course fooling no one. Patton glanced away but Virgil’s gaze only hardened, squeezing the other man’s hand and swearing under his breath.

“I guess....I guess all of us here- everyone at the estate really- would benefit from him not being in charge. It’s still incredibly risky.” Here Virgil glared daggers at Logan and Roman specifically. “But I think with the right people...the right poison maybe, it could work.”

“Do you have a suggestion?” Logan asked curiously.

“Not me, but I know people that might. What are we thinking the time table will be for this?”

Roman perked up as they all looked at him. “Well...it might be a good idea to carry it out a good while after the wedding. If it happens immediately after, it would look a lot more suspicious than if we waited.”

Logan frowned.  “But Roman-”

“Logan, you know I’m right.” Roman startled a bit at the sheer amount of concern he saw in Logan’s eyes, but gave him a small smile as reassurance. “I’ll be fine until then.”

“Well,” Both of their heads snapped around to face Virgil again, neither acknowledging the slight pink in their cheeks. “If we’re waiting that long that’s plenty of time for me to get in contact with my guys and figure something out. Really it shouldn’t be too hard.”

Patton made a small noise in the back of his throat. “Um, exactly what kind of guys, Virgil?”

Virgil laughed outright. “Oh, total degenerates for sure! But they’re also both idiots, and that didn’t change when they set up their apothecary, so I wouldn’t worry about it too much.”

“So it’s set then? We’re doing this?” Roman couldn’t help the hopeful edge to his tone, and he immediately felt a stab of guilt.

What would his friends think of him now, so eager to take such a drastic measure? But a quick glance at their faces revealed only sympathy and determination, and he forced himself to breathe. There was a reason he’d come to these three specifically, and now he had to trust that he’d made the right call.

“Yes.” Logan said, taking his hand and giving it a squeeze, and Roman felt himself relax. “We are.”

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[fandomfanficsgalore]

Soon..... ;)

[youdontownmebolton]

Character Tag Things:

Tagged by: @damon-dance-for-me

Tagging: @thotrobbstark, @ladyshedirewolf

(Note: the bold is for all that is or can be appropriate for Domeric. There are several things that are verse dependant, so know that things can be up to interpretation. 😊)

bold applies,

bold italic verse dependent

WEALTH:

$  FINANCIAL : wealthy / moderate / poor / in poverty

✚  MEDICAL : fit / moderate / sickly / disabled / disadvantaged / non applicable

✪  CLASS OR CASTE : upper / middle / working / street trash / slave / unsure

✔  EDUCATION : qualified / unqualified / studying / other

✖  CRIMINAL RECORD : yes, for major crimes / yes, for minor crimes / no / hasn’t been caught.

FAMILY:

◒  CHILDREN : has a child or children / has no children / wants children / verse dependent

◑  RELATIONSHIP WITH FAMILY : close with sibling(s) / not close with sibling(s) / has no siblings / sibling(s) is deceased

◔  AFFILIATION : orphaned / adopted / disowned / raised by birth parent(s) / not applicable

TRAITS + TENDENCIES

♦  extroverted / introverted / in between

♦  disorganized / organized / in between

♦  close-minded / open-minded / in between

♦ calm / anxious / in between

♦  disagreeable / agreeable / in between

♦ cautious / reckless / in between

♦ patient / impatient / in between

♦ outspoken / reserved / in between

♦  leader / follower / in between

♦ empathetic / unempathetic / in between

♦  optimistic / pessimistic / in between

♦  traditional / modern / in between

♦ hard-working / lazy / in between

♦  cultured / uncultured / in between / unknown

♦  loyal / disloyal / unknown

♦ faithful / unfaithful / unknown

BELIEFS

★  FAITH : monotheist / polytheist / atheist / agnostic / it’s complicated

☆  BELIEF IN GHOSTS OR SPIRITS : yes / no / don’t know / don’t care

✮  BELIEF IN AN AFTERLIFE : yes / no / don’t know / don’t care

✯  BELIEF IN REINCARNATION : yes / no / don’t know / don’t care

❃  BELIEF IN ALIENS : yes / no / don’t know / don’t care

✧  RELIGIOUS : orthodox / liberal / in between / not religious

❀  PHILOSOPHICAL : yes / no

SEXUALITY + ROMANTIC INCLINATION

❤  SEXUALITY : heterosexual / homosexual / bisexual / asexual / pansexual / demisexual

❥  SEX : sex repulsed / sex neutral / sex favorable / naive and clueless

♥  ROMANCE : romance repulsed / romance neutral / romance favorable / naive and clueless

❣  SEXUALLY : adventurous / experienced / naive / inexperienced / curious / inhibited

⚧  POTENTIAL SEXUAL PARTNERS : male / female / agender / other / none / all

⚧  POTENTIAL ROMANTIC PARTNERS : male / female / agender / other / none / all

ABILITIES

☠  COMBAT SKILLS : excellent / good / moderate / poor / none  

≡  LITERACY SKILLS :  excellent / good / moderate / poor / none

✍  ARTISTIC SKILLS : excellent / good / moderate / poor / none

✂  TECHNICAL SKILLS :  excellent / good / moderate / poor / none

HABITS

☕  DRINKING ALCOHOL :  never / sometimes / frequently / to excess

☁  SMOKING : never / sometimes / frequently / to excess

✿  OTHER NARCOTICS : never / sometimes / frequently / to excess

✌  MEDICINAL DRUGS : never / sometimes / frequently / to excess

☻  INDULGENT FOOD : never / sometimes / frequently / to excess

$  SPLURGE SPENDING : never / sometimes / frequently / to excess

♣  GAMBLING : never / sometimes / frequently / to excess

[808rebel]

#raisedbythesea #YDOM

[eveofthehallows]

hit the like button if your a proxy too!

[kexiathalexanderpawwer]

YDOM

[xratedffbarbiex]

Omg you don’t own me!!!! Loved it!!! Another thing I loved about the shh series was that all parts were posted so I could continuously read it and every chapter was very long which I loveeed!!! You my friend are amazing!!

i loved writing YDOM. I didn’t think people would be down for it though but it seems to be loved. 

I wrote it in just over two weeks. The response that I got after posting each chapter is what spurred me on to continue writing and posting. The support was incredible and I’m in awe that people loved it so much. 

No, YOU’RE amazing for sending me this after reading. You’ve blown me away and I’m so happy rn. 

x

+ You Don’t Own Me  +

+ Shhhh. +

[5-falsehoods-phonated]

You Don’t Own Me (You Don’t Even Know Me)

Chapter 1

Summary:  As the son of a Baron, Roman Sanders always knew that when he married, it would be due to a political arrangement rather than true love. Still, when he is sent away to marry an older, more powerful Earl, he is determined to make the best of his situation. Despite the Earl's indifference towards him, Roman forges ahead and prepares to become the best husband he can possibly be, making new friends along the way. But when his fiancé's demeanor turns from cold to cruel, Roman must shift all of his focus to survival, and find a way out of his marriage before it's too late.

Ships: Logince (Logan x Roman)  Moxiety (Virgil x Patton)

Content Warnings: arranged marriage, abuse, attempted sexual assault, murder, poisoning, character death, hurt/comfort, angst

Word Count: 2604

Read on AO3: here!

Cowritten with @ironwoman359 masterlist

False masterlist

As the son of the Baron of Falkirk, Roman Sanders always knew that when he married, it would be due to a political arrangement. There was a small part of him that mourned the loss of the chance to meet a beautiful stranger and fall hopelessly in love, like the characters in the fairytales that his nanny read to him as a child. But those fantasies were just that, fairytales. The fanciful whims of a child had no place in Roman’s life now that he had come of age. His marriage was to serve one purpose: to elevate his family. 

And Roman had been training for that purpose his entire life. 

Barely a month had passed since Roman’s twentieth birthday when he was called into his father’s study. He knew that whatever the reason for his summons, it must be important, as his father hated more than anything to be interrupted in his work. Roman knocked twice on the familiar, thick oak doors, and held his breath until he heard his father’s muffled answer from within. 

“Come in.” 

Roman stepped inside, and was surprised to see his mother and older brother already in the room, seated opposite his father’s old mahogany desk. As he entered, his father stood, gesturing to an empty chair that sat beside his mother. 

“Have a seat, son.” 

Roman sat. 

“I have good news,” his father continued. “As you have now reached the proper age, one of my primary interests has been to find an appropriate arrangement for your marriage.” 

Roman’s heartbeat quickened, and he forced himself to remain calm, folding his hands in his lap. This was it. This was the moment that he’d been preparing for nearly all of his life; the moment that would shape his entire future. 

“There were many factors to consider,” his father said, stepping around the desk to stand beside his wife. “It was not an easy decision. However, your mother and I have entered an agreement that we believe will be very profitable, for you and for the family.” 

Roman nodded. His father was a shrewd negotiator; he was sure that, whatever the terms of the engagement were, the Sanders family would not lose more than what it stood to gain. 

“So, you’ve reached a decision then, Father?” he asked, taking a deep breath and willing his expression to remain neutral.

“I have,” his father agreed. “You are to be wed to the Earl of Asberg, Lord Garret Howard. I have just received a message from his footman: they arrived at the Fireside Inn late this afternoon. Tomorrow, they will come to the manor to bring you to Lord Howard’s estate to begin the engagement period.” 

Roman bit back a gasp, his eyes growing wide. 

“Lord Howard?” he repeated. “I was not even aware the earl was looking for a suitor.” 

“For many years, he was not,” Roman’s mother spoke up. “His youth was spent primarily securing the political and financial status of his late father’s estate. Only recently has he turned his attention to more social matters.” 

“Your dowry aside, the connections we will gain through this marriage will be of an immense benefit to us,” said Roman’s father. “I know you know your duty son; I trust you will make us proud.” 

“I will, Father,” Roman said, getting to his feet. His father held out a hand, and Roman shook it firmly, doing his best to ignore the butterflies in his stomach. “Thank you.” 

His mother and brother stood as well, and Roman let his mother pull him into a quick hug and plant a kiss on his cheek. 

“Congratulations dear,” she said as she pulled away, a proud smile on her face. “I know you’ll do just wonderfully.” 

“Thank you, Mother,” he said, squeezing her hand, and then his brother was in front of him. 

“Congrats, Ro,” he said quietly. 

“Thanks, Remy,” Roman whispered, and when they shook hands, Roman hoped Remy didn’t notice the slight tremble in his grip. 

“The carriage will arrive at eight o’clock tomorrow morning,” Roman’s father declared. “I’ve already instructed the maids to pack your clothing. Whatever other preparations you need, I suggest you make them now.” 

“I will. Thank you, Father,” Roman said again, bowing his head slightly to his family.

He left the study, walking through the halls of the manor as though walking through a dream. He reached his quarters, and it was only after he shut the door behind him that he realized he very well might never walk the path from the study to his room again. He sat on the edge of his bed, his formal posture falling from his shoulders like a forgotten shawl now that he was alone. 

True to his father’s words, a trunk lay open at the foot of his bed, his shirts and trousers and suits all carefully folded and placed inside by the maid. Another, smaller trunk had been placed beside it, no doubt for Roman to fill with whatever else he wished to bring with him to his fiance’s estate. 

His fiance…

Sun, moon, and stars, he was engaged. It wasn’t as though he didn’t know it was coming; he was the youngest of his parents’ three children, after all. As the oldest son, Remington would inherit the title Baron of Falkirk and all the duties that came with it, while Roman and Remus would be married into other families to increase the Sanders’ political influence. So Roman had always known that he was destined to leave the family manor. 

That didn’t necessarily mean he was ready to. 

He sighed, sweeping his eyes around his room. What would he even take with him? A single evening was hardly enough time for him to consider all that he owned and decide what to bring on a permanent move halfway across the country. Should he bring his books, his star charts, his journals and quills? Or would he be able to find suitable replacements for them all at Lord Howard’s estate? Would he even have time to indulge in his hobbies as the husband of an earl? If only he’d had more than a day’s notice of his departure, then he’d have time to think!

A light knock on the door pulled Roman from his thoughts, and he straightened instantly. 

“Who is it?” he called. 

“It’s me, Roman,” came the answer, and Roman relaxed at the sound of his brother’s voice. 

“Come on in, Rem.” 

Remy stepped into the room, closing the door behind him and giving Roman what was probably meant to be a smile, but came out more like a grimace. 

“So, it’s finally time,” he said, and Roman rolled his eyes. 

“No need to sound like I’m on my deathbed, Remy. It’s just an engagement, we all knew this was coming.” 

“Yeah, yeah,” Remy sighed, plopping down on the bed next to Roman and leaning back against the headboard. “Still...I had sort of hoped you’d end up somewhere decently close by. Gremont, for instance, I know Lady Lishan has a daughter who’s eligible. Or maybe Ravenhold. Then you could at least visit. Asberg is…” 

“Far,” Roman agreed. 

He’d been trying not to think about it. Asberg was at least four days away by carriage, maybe longer depending on the weather, and Roman had never been so far away from home unaccompanied in his life. 

“Hey though, the wedding’s only six months away. I’ll get to see you then! And who knows, maybe I’ll be able to come visit for the harvest festival next year...or you could come visit me!” 

“Only if you serve coffee,” Remy joked, and Roman laughed, the tension in the room easing just a bit. 

“Help me pack?” Roman asked. “I can’t figure out if I should bring everything or nothing.”

“Hmm…” Remy sat up and scanned the room. “My advice? Bring only what you think you can’t live without.”

Roman hesitated, then looked up at his brother. 

“You?” he suggested. He tried to shoot Remy a playful smirk, but he could feel the corners of his mouth wobbling, and he knew from the sad smile on his brother’s face that Remy didn’t buy it. 

“I wish, Ro-bro,” Remy said, nudging their shoulders together. “But I think one son running away from home is enough of a scandal for Father to deal with.”

“That’s fair, I suppose,” Roman said, looking down and fiddling with his fingers in his lap. “What...what do you think Remus would say? If he were here to see me off?”

“Honestly?” Remy looked up at the ceiling for a moment, then snorted. “He wouldn’t say anything, he’d just lock you in the bedroom and throw away the key to make you stay. Or kidnap you and hide you somewhere so that the wedding had to be cancelled altogether.” 

“You’re probably right,” Roman said. He chuckled, but the laugh felt hollow, like a piece of it was missing...gone forever and irreplaceable, just like his brother. “Did...did I ever tell you that he came to see me, the night he left?” he asked quietly. 

“No,” Remy answered. “But I had a feeling that he did.” 

“He asked me to go with him,” Roman said. “To leave you and Mother and Father and everything we’d ever known, to go chasing ‘freedom’ and ‘adventure,’ like we were children again.” He shook his head, closing his fingers into fists. “I told him I couldn’t.”

“I think he knew that,” Remy said. “But I...I also think he felt he had to at least ask you for himself. I don’t think he’d really believe that you wanted to stay unless he heard you say it.” 

“And I did want to stay,” Roman insisted. “I begged him to stay. But he wouldn’t listen, and he left, and now it’s been three years and I have to leave you and Mother and Father and everything I’ve ever known anyway, except now I’ll be alone.” Roman looked up at Remy, his eyes shining with un-shed tears. “What if...what if I made the wrong choice?” 

Remy pulled him closer, hooking his chin over Roman’s head like he did when they were small and Roman would trip in the garden and scrape his knee. 

“I can’t answer that for you, Ro-bro,” he murmured. “That’s something you have to figure out. But for what it’s worth...I’m glad you stayed. It- it would have been even harder, I think, to lose both of you.” 

“You’re losing me now,” Roman whispered, but Remy shook his head. 

“No,” he said vehemently. “I’m not. You said it yourself, Roman, the wedding’s only in six months. And Asberg may be far, but it’s not like it's across the ocean or anything. We’ll still be able to see each other once in a while. Remus…” Remy sighed, and tightened his grip around Roman’s shoulders. “Remus left us for himself. You’re leaving us for the family. That’s the difference.” 

“Yeah...I know,” Roman said, sniffling a little and nestling deeper into his brother’s hold. “I’m still gonna miss you though.” 

“I’ll miss you too, Ro-bro,” Remy said, dropping a kiss into Roman’s hair. “I’ll miss you too.”

Remy eventually left Roman to pack, and the rest of the night passed in a blur. Roman finally decided what to bring with him (his used notebooks and journals, his collection of star charts, and an old cloak that the maid hadn’t packed because it was torn, but that Roman couldn’t bear to part with) and what to leave behind (unused sketchbooks, his set of inks and quills, and the ancient paint set that he hadn’t touched in almost a year), but when he lay down to try and get some rest, sleep evaded him. He tossed and turned for what felt like hours, unable to stop his thoughts from racing. Morning arrived far too soon for his liking, and before he’d really processed what was happening, he was standing at the bottom of the front steps of the manor with his family, waiting for the carriage to arrive. 

"Now Roman, remember," his father said, and Roman looked up at him. "Lord Howard oversees an estate far larger than our own. Whatever duties you are expected to perform, they will be on a scale far greater than what you are accustomed to here."

"He may look to you to aid him in business, but he may also expect you to oversee more of the social obligations. He has dealings with many different families, after all," Roman's mother added, and Roman nodded.

"Politics is never just about numbers," he recited, and his father's lips twitched in a small smile.

"That's right, son. Remember all that we've taught you, and you'll do fine."

A carriage pulled in at the end of the manor's drive, and Roman took a deep breath.

"Remember to write!" his mother said, pressing a kiss to his cheek and giving his shoulder a squeeze. 

Roman placed a hand over hers, then shot Remy a lopsided smile.

"Any last words for me, Rem?"

Remy smirked, and ruffled Roman's hair.

"If you let Earlship go to your head, I’ll cut you out of the estate when I take over."

"Honestly, Remington," their mother said, rolling her eyes, and Remy winked at Roman.

The carriage reached them then, and Roman quickly moved to fix his hair. A footman hopped down from a seat on the rear, and bowed to Roman's father.

"Good morning," he said as he straightened. "I come on behalf of my Lord Garret Howard, Earl of Asberg, to deliver a dowry payment to Lord Phillip Sanders, Baron of Falkirk, and to collect his lordship's fiance, Lord Roman Sanders."

"Thank you, sir," said Roman's father, nodding to the footman. "Our family is honored by this union. May I present my son, Roman."

Roman inclined his head to the servant, who bowed again, quick and low.

"A pleasure, my lord. Allow me to gather your things."

Roman's luggage was loaded onto the back of the carriage, and Roman tried not to think about the large trunk that was unloaded and left at his father's feet. He hadn't been told the amount of his dowry, and he didn't want to know. For some reason, it made him feel strange to think about money being given to his family in return for his hand; it made it seem more like he'd been bought, when that wasn't the case! 

“Well,” he said when everything was ready to go. “I guess this is it.” 

“Safe journey, son,” his father said, laying a hand on his shoulder. “Make us proud.”

Roman swallowed the lump in his throat and nodded. He gave his family as strong a smile as he could muster, then he stepped into the carriage and the footman closed the door behind him. Roman drew the curtains back from the window and peered behind them as the carriage pulled away from his home. Remy and his mother were both waving, and even his father raised his hand briefly in farewell. Roman watched them grow smaller and smaller, and then the carriage turned out of the grounds and he couldn’t see them anymore. The manor that had been his entire world for the past twenty years shrank into the distance, until it was nothing but a speck on the horizon. 

Roman finally turned around so he was facing the direction the carriage was traveling. His father’s words echoed in his mind, and he took a deep breath. 

Don’t worry, father, he thought. I’ll make you proud. I’ll make our whole family proud.

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[lauraambrulaityte]

Meilė skaudino, skaudinai ir Tu, kai mūsų atminimams jau nebus ribų, kai dūmai virto ašarom o pelenai jausmais, kai mylėjau šitaip stipriai kad nemačiau tarp musu pabaigos. Kai nebegrįši ryta aš taves sulauksiu ir naktis jau nebetamsi be tavo veido, žmonės, jie atleido aš nesugebėsiu taip mylėti stipriai kaip kiti mylėjo, mūsų pasakos turėjo tiksla, su jausmais mes nugalėjom viska, nebepyk nemoku nebepyk atleidžiu viskas ka norėjau ir tave paleidžiu, gal surasi tą kuri kovos dėl tavo šypsenos, gal surasi tą kuri mylės tave su ydom, aš mylėjau viska vasara ir sniega , gi buvau mažuutė be kurios gyvenimo nelieka, nepadėjo pančiai ir vaiku žaidimai, išlydėnau tave su dangaus sprogimu, su ašarom ant veido ir jausmais be kvapo kai kita jau lietė ttai kas buvo mano, nebemato akys tavo atminimo šito paorašyt tenoriu iš gyvenimo žaidimo, suklupau atkeiski jau ne taip skaudėjo kai kituos veiduos aš tavajį matyt norėjau. Vienuma nedingsta nepalika žingsniu tu buvai saldainis tu buvai man viskis, liko plytos mūrai ir sena keptuvė ar pamane dar viska kas tarp musu buvo. Šildėm leda šaldėm ašaras ir skausma bet kartu tai buvo tiktais laimės skausmas. Šiandien aš viena, šiandien be likimo tu esi man viskas kas vertas atminimo. Ačiū tau už meilę begalinę laimę kad ir kas nutiks aš busiu tavo kelias, ne monetos ir ne rūmai kūrė mums visata, aš atsiprašau išeinu ir ačiū ❤ 2019 06 12 jau geriau

[szkola551]

V Zjazd - Książka - SAiP I LO

Składa się teraz Sturmbannführer Höfle do nich, do Żydów, z zapytaniem, czy ramię niemieckiego bohatera posiada obowiązek osłabnąć, omdleć choć na chwilę? Nadejście czego Höfle zapowiada. Höfle mówi dosyć. Żadnych takich, świnie. Dosyć krętactwa, handlu, mędrkowania. 16 czerwca ósmoklasiści pisali egzamin z języka polskiego, a 17 czerwca - z matematyki. Karwasz, Grzegorz, Karbowski, Andrzej, Na końcu języka (Volty), Foton 96, 2007, s. Dlaczego? Ponieważ są nie tylko niedrogie, a jeszcze niezwykle skuteczne. A ale oni, oni mogli zatem wziąć jasno, bez skrupułów i przeniewierstwa idei. Jedna jest ziemia, sama opinia na niej i indywidualny tylko Bóg patrzy z głowy na fakty Führera. To kanał, który zatrudnia do szerzenia informacji spośród działu chemii uczniom szkół podstawowych, a jeszcze średnich. Biblijna próba rozpoczyna się w czasie pojawienia się przed tronem Boga szatana, który kwestionuje czystość i pobożność Hioba. Stoicy - założycielem jej stanowił Zenon z Kition, który zarabiał na przełomie IV i III w. Dlatego pseudo nauka kontroluje twój umysł , który tworzy absorbować czystą truciznę duchową. Bierność, i nawet apatia, powodują masowe zmniejszanie się statusu materialnego, oraz co wewnątrz tym chodzi, także statusu społecznego rodzin. W samym mieście wolno go zobaczyć daleką część i doskonały rynek, a też liczne tropikalne ogrody.

Niestety, wielka część naszych rodaków popiera czołowe postulaty antychrystycznej rewolucji. Pierwszy raz w byciu mi się to zdarza, że idę w drogę nie bardzo znając, dokąd. Jednak taki był mały, wcale nie wiem, gdy on daruje tę droga. Bo… jak zamaluję, to tworzona matula nie pozna. Edukacja dzieci w dziale bezpieczeństwa jest zadaniem długim i potrzebującym pełnego zainteresowania ze części rodziców, jak i nauczycieli. Jak pisać taką relację? Znowu złapiesz anginę i ja będę wymagała koło ciebie skakać, oraz gdy ty jesteś zły, to niewątpliwie, że ja jestem temu powinna. I kiedy spadnie deszcz? Traktują wszystkich jak bydło. Jak osiągnąć wiele tańsze gierki komputerowe? Ty tam, lub się trochę dodatkowo nie drzyj pyska, jak idziesz za pogrzebem własnego tatusia, z płaczkami i orkiestrą. Oraz jak ty teraz wyglądasz? Bałagan, bałagan, jeszcze raz bałagan. Po raz ważny w działaniu widzę coś podobnego… Coś podobnego. Widzi człowiek ten zegarek? Niech pan ją wykończy w plecy, bowiem ona mnie woła także nie słyszy, że ja ją wszystek czas wołam.

Panie policjancie, złociutki, wróci mężczyzna ze mną? Panie policjancie, czy mąż nie mógłby mi łaskawie powiedzieć, w jakim kierunku odjeżdża nasz gust oraz o której dokładnie godzinie? Czy mężczyzna nie mógłby skończyć mi następować po piętach, panie szanowny? Widzi pan tę panią w granatowym sweterku? Dosyć, świnie. Ży-y-y-ydom wara od tego, co do nich nie należy. Gmach tysiącletniego Państwa jaśnieje oto przed oczami zdumionej i oczarowanej ludzkości. Odżydzić ludzkość. Takie oto zadanie postawił Führer zahartowanym szeregom National-Partei. Człowiek przejdzie przez ogień oczyszczony, plemię ocalone, gatunek zbawiony. Zabierz tę walizkę. Dziecko przez ciebie nie przejść tu nie może. Nie spieszył się ani o minutę przez ostatnie dwadzieścia lat. Łajdacy i nie szanują ludzkich nerwów ani zdrowia. Siadajcie- zaproponował Ani i Misiowi. Także od tego nie odstąpią, ani na etap. Wina- Ja jestem czysty, panie posterunkowy, zasymilowany, półkrwi Aryjczyk w trzecim pokoleniu! Posterunkowy, gdzie posterunkowy? Tutaj jakaś staruszka zasłabła, tkwi w wytrwaniu i zagradza drogę.

Teraz sam tkwi w łóżku i kto mu poda herbaty? Treść tegoż nie zapomni i ludzkość, po wiek wieków. Historia tegoż nie zapomni a teraz dzisiaj krwią robione są jej najchlubniejsze karty. Krwi! Tego łaknie historia. Zostaw pani majątek, a uratujesz życie. Zalewska. I że dla osoby minister papież zajmuje nie w Watykanie, działaj na Żoliborzu, toż możemy uważać sprawę za przesądzoną. Chemia organiczna jako odrębny dział chemii wydzieliła się tylko w 2 poł. Jednocześnie należy podkreślić, że organizacje efektywnie wykorzystują nowoczesne metody, w tym technologii informatyczne, jako dobry instrument przekazywania informacji, podnoszenia poziomu prace i osób swoich członków i finalnie - do przygotowania podpisów w myśli. Ambicje i obowiązki: wyzwolenie ojczyzny, obudzenie świadomości narodowej, pokorna zgodność z pozostałymi. Just when children - and, let's face it, many adults - finally got the catchy tune Let It Go out of their heads, along came this sequel. By such methods we have plucked out of the midst of MASONRY the very root of protest against our disposition. Mniej drażnią ciało, wywołują mniej powikłań (czyli np. krwawienia) i szybko jest się organizmowi goić. sprawdzian , ale jazda słowna, że hohho! Drugim powołaniem jest walczyć dalej. Pierwszym bowiem powołaniem germańskiego plemienia jest walczyć.

Korzystałem z masażu nóg i ciała, korzystałem ze świec do uszu, ale najciekawszym badaniem było przyżeganie… Studio SPACJA to kameralny gabinet masażu w Gdyni, w którym zregenerujesz się fizycznie i psychicznie. 35 oraz poćwicz działanie i usuwanie na grafach na str. Lubomir Lembas oraz dr n. Alfabet oraz liczby mamy teraz za sobą. W współczesnych terminach tak przygotowany serwis wymagał pracy grafika, osoby odpowiedzialnej za stworzenie HTMLa, animacji Flashowych także osoby czuwającej nad kontrolą całego procesu. Gospodarzami spotkania byli swoi partnerzy, nauczyciele szkoły podstawowej KAYABASI ALEMDAR ILKOGRETIM OKULU z Eregli, malowniczej miejscowości nad Morzem Czarnym na północy kraju. Taka krytyka, choć trochę ostra, uznaje się być prawdziwa, bowiem, na odległości tych kilku lat, od 31 grudnia 1999 roku, gdy to niedomagający Jelcyn mianował Putina prezydentem, ten regularnie i pozostałymi rodzajami próbował zwiększyć kontrolę Kremla nad wszystkim krajem. Dopiero zwycięstwo Saladyna nad krzyżowcami w 1187 r. Powodzenie w samozatracie, powodzenie w grze. Zad 3 str 134 Myślcie że podane trapezy są równoramienne. Wykonaj zadania 1, 2, 3 ze str. 3. Czytanie wybranych bajek (podręcznik str.

[issiskyriau]

2017-05-05   00:07

Jau virš mėnesio kaip mes esame atskirai. Bendrai paėmus jaučiuosi gana gerai: susitvarkiau miego režimą, rytais mankštinuosi, atsakingiau žiūriu į savo pareigas, kas šiuo metu yra mano bakalaurinis darbas. Jaučiuos energingiau ir ramiau negu buvo pasidarę įprasta per praeitus metus. Pradedu suprasti, kad didžiausia problema mano santykiuose ir šiaip gyvenime yra faktas, kad nemoku rūpintis savimi. Kai esu viena tai dažniausiai nebado akių, nes nei vienas žmogus nėra taip arti, kad tai aiškiai matytų. Turint partnerį visa gėda ties tuo, kokia apsileidus esu, išnyra į paviršių. Pradėjau rūpintis savo apsileidimu tam, kad prieš nieką neturėčiau kuo gėdytis.

Matai, aš linkus slėpti savo iracionalumą, emocionalumą, perfekcionizmą kažkur po kilimu lyg tai būtų didžiausia gyvenimo gėda. Tuo pačiu, kai esu užvaldyta šių demonų, aš tarytum juos įsimyliu ir nepripažįstu, kad tai požiūrio klaida ir nieko kito. Kovoju už savo įsiplieskusią paranoją, irzulį ar kitą šunybę, kišančią koją mano ramybei. Taip pat dažnai noriu slėpti, kad esu silpna, kad pasiduodu savo ydoms ir jos mane užvaldo ir tempia bala žino kur. Aš noriu atrodyti ideali ir tai labai vargina. O išsekus aš ne taip gerai slepiu visas šias grožybes ir jos išlenda netinkamu metu netinkamoj vietoj.

Dar ką supratau, kad aš vaikine ieškau išgelbėtojo nuo nuobodybės, todėl tuo pačiu man labai baisu būti neįdomiai savo partneriui. Problema tame, kad aš nieko nedarau tam, kad pati save ištraukčiau iš pilkos rutinos, o laukiu kol gyvenimo jaudulys iškris man po kojom iš giedro dangaus. Laukiu kol kas kur nors pakvies. Laukiu tinkamo momento, galimybės, finansinės padėties. Kantrybė nėra blogas dalykas, o supratimas, kad viskas neatsiranda tą pačią akimirką, kai užsimanai ,irgi yra pravartus. Tačiau neverta pamiršti, kad turi imtis veiksmų, kurie nuvestų link norimo tikslo. Visam kam – darbu nusietas kelias. O pradėjus užsiimti savo norais, kartais pasirodo, kad siekiamybė nėra taip sunkiai prieinama, kaip kartais gali pasirodyti.

Visa tai kyla iš to, kad pradinėje visas dėmesys, kurio susilaukdavau iš vaikinų, buvo patyčios, o būdas su tuo kovoti – neparodyti, kad tai mane liečia. Dar geriau jei pašmaikštausiu, o mane menkinusius žmones tai prajuokins ir bent kuriam laikui jų akyse aš būsi lygi jiems. Vakar kalbėjau su drauge apie tai ir vėlei pajaučiau, kaip smarkiai ši dinamika klasėje mane paveikė. Kaip smarkiai gėdijaus savęs, visų savo minusų, nes jie buvo kliūtis jaustis laisvai mokykloje, jaustis, lyg esu lygiavertė savo bendraklasiams. Įpratau. Įpratau pastoviai įrodinėti, kad esu verta ir pastoviai slėpt, kad esu silpna. Sudaryt kietos panos įvaizdį. Gyventi įvaizdžiu, o ne tuo, kas esu.

Bet iš tikrųjų dabar užsimaniau parašyti kažką ne dėl to, kad pasidaličiau šiais dalykais. Tiesiog man pasirodė svarbu parodyti, kad man viskas gerai, kad aš dirbu su savimi kiek gaunas. Psichologė, mankšta, miego režimas, vėl grįžau prie filosofijos, bandau susidaryti dienotvarkę, daugiau dirbti ir daugiau padaryti per dieną. Vieną dieną gaunasi ir aš įsirangau į patalus patenkinta savimi, o kitą dieną... Na, būna sunkiau. Ir dažnai tą sunkesnę dieną, kai paleidžiu vadeles, į mintis grįžta klausimai ties tuo, kas buvo.

Ar normalu, kad aš vis dar galvoju apie jį? Mane kažkiek nervina, kad jo vardas manyje vis dar sukelia sąmyšį ir atrodo „na kaip čia dabar dar vis taip apie jį galvoji?“. Iš to kyla ir nusivylimas savimi, kad man taip sunku paleisti tai, kas buvo. Taip sunku paleisti žmogų. Taip sunku nuoširdžiai jam linkėti geros kloties, kurioje aš nebūčiau svarbus veikėjas. Aš vis dar susiduriu su mintimis, kad noriu būti jam svarbi. Kodėl tokios mintys man vis kyla? Ką tokio ypatingo aš jame pamačiau? Kodėl man taip reikia to pripažinimo iš jo? Kai užrašau šiuos klausimus, puikiai suprantu, kad tai susiję su visais dalykais, kuriuos aprašiau aukščiau. Tai iš dalies užsilikęs noras įtikti mano skriaudėjams. Nenoriu pasakyt, kad jis mane žiauriai kankino ar kažką iš tos serijos. Mane skaudino jo nesugebėjimas nuspręsti, ar jis nori bandyti kurti santykius ir ši dilema jo nebuvo sprendžiama metus. Dėl to aš tikrai kentėjau. Nes nesugebėjau suprast, kad šis klausimas nėra mano reikalas ir rūpintis savais. Vietoj to, aš nuolat galvojau apie tai, kaip norėčiau, kad jis pasirinktų bandyti tai. Kodėl man kilo toks noras? Kas man iš to? Tai visiška ego problema. Iš vienos pusės aš pati sau buvau nepakankama, iš kitos pusės – nenorėjau pripažint, kad manyje yra daug dalykų, kuriais reikėtų užsiimti. Manau jo pasakymas „taip, aš noriu būti su tavimi“ būtų tam tikras pasiekimas iš tokios pozicijos – aš turėčiau ne tik save, bet tuo pačiu mano problemos būtų ne tokios jau baisios, jei nepaisant jų jis rinktųsi mane. Bet ar tai ilgalaikis vaistas nuo vidinių kančių? Juk pilnai įmanoma, kad nepakankamai atrodytų ir duetas, o visa, ko gėdijuos, niekur neišnyktų.

Manyje kyla noras eiti su juo į kontaktą, tačiau tuo pačiu tvyro abejonė, kad tai yra teisingas sprendimas. Niekaip negaliu išsigryninti, kas šiuo atveju būtų tas teisingas sprendimas. Vienu metu mąstau, kad man jokios dramos, įtampos nereikia tol, kol neišsispręsiu bakalauro klausimo. Rizikuoti savo ramybe, kurią, turiu pripažinti, susitikimai su juo kiek sudrumsčia, yra per didelė prabanga. Bet tuo pačiu viduje kyla toks vidinis prieštaravimas, sakantis, kad dar ne viską išbandėmė! Aš nebandžiau gyventi savo gyvenimo būnant drauge su juo, nebandėme retesnių susitikimų ir taip toliau. Kyla noras kovoti už savo meilę ir kažkoks nusivylimas, kad paslydau ir nesusitvarkiau su sunkumais. Ir atrodo laikas tiksi ir jei nedarysiu kažko dabar, tai viskas bus žlugę visiems laikams!... Taip... Parašau tą antrą dalį ir suprantu, kad kažkas ne taip tame. Kad tai vis dar kalba mano ego, norintis nukreipt mano dėmesį šalin nuo mano asmeninių ydų, kurias spręsti aš turiu galios. Kad tai yra vis dar susiję su nemokėjimu būti su savimi. Kad tai nėra meilė jam, kad tai nėra meilė man, kad tai nėra meilė. Už meilę kovot nereikia. Ji tiesiog yra.

Man irgi reikia tiesiog būti. Tiesiog daryti savo darbus, nes tai malšina nerimą. Tiesiog mankštintis, nes tai palaiko kūno gerbūvį. Tiesiog bendrauti, rūpintis šeima ir draugais, kai yra tam polėkis. Tiesiog būti ir matyti, kokia reali mano reikmė ir pasirinkti tuo ir užsiimti. Juk aiškiausias dalykas, kurį mataua per šį laiką yra tai, kad aš grįžtu prie minčių apie jį tada, kai pradedu jausti, kad darau ne tai, kas yra teisinga ir tai, ko man reikia tą akimirką.

Kaip paleisti jį? Daryti savo dalykus. Rūpintis savimi, savo gerbūviu ir atsakomybėmis. Rūpintis tais, kurie mano rūpestį priima ir kuriems jo reikia. Pagauti save, kai pradedu grimzti į saldų galvos laužymą dėl praeities.

Noriu tik vieno – mylėti, nes tai yra teisingas požiūris į pasaulį. Jei mylėsiu, tai paleisiu ir jį, paleisiu save ir leisiu dalykams tekėti ir vesti mane tolyn. Paleisiu praeities krantus. Tai yra ko aš noriu ir ką aš galiu padaryti. Sėkmės.

[808rebel]

#raisedbythesea #friendsforever #YDOM

[livingbetweentheborders]

YDOM - Chapter two - Research

"Do not you want to invite me in?" Elektra asked in a playful tone and a grin on her lips. Matthew was completely surprised or overwhelmed. He definitely had not expected that. Or maybe he had even expected her appearance, but not that she would stand so openly in front of him, even knock. After his facial expressions had caught, however, his expression became pejorative. "Leave Elektra." She felt a pain in her, a pull that went through her entire body, but she did not show it. She put on her porkerface like so often. "That's how you greet me," she said, leaning against the doorframe. "I was hoping we would start where we left off." Again, a playful grin appeared on her lips. "That was a completely different situation. We were dying. "" I think we both look quite alive, don't you think?" Now she stopped waiting and just pushed him aside to enter. She ran unerringly into his living room. He had had dinner with Jessica and emptied half a bottle of his favorite whiskey. Sure, he kept her with that. Whiskey. He had probably started to wash it off, because only half of the dishes were on the table. "What are you doing here?", He asked and followed her. "Would you believe me if I said I missed you?" It felt like a Dejavue, as if they had just had that same conversation before. And they did. At that time, however, it was a completely different situation. At that time she returned to his life after 10 years, with knowledge that he did not have yet. Back then, before they joined the Hand, before learning that she was the secret weapon of the organization. Back when they came together and lost themselves. Back then. Before she died."Seriously Elektra. I have nothing to tell you! "" Because I swore I would kill the nuns if you left the monastery or you died? "She asked dryly and turned back to Matthew. "You did not die and left the monastery. And they are still alive. Empty words to make a bit more pressure. Call it desperation, "she said, pouring herself a glass of Macallen, glancing at the couch where files were scattered. "Elektra, you have not changed a bit. I tried to save you until death. You ... "" What? Save me from what? From myself. Matthew, that's me. I have always been, and always will be. I will always protect what I love to the death, I will stop at nothing. I will not give up. That's why I'm the way I am. And I love you. "" That's what you call love Elektra? You're gone again, God knows where ... you ... "" I brought you to the place you needed. Close to God, "she said and he was silent. This sentence had triggered something in him. Despite his anger and perhaps grief, he did not give up, he would not give up, that was as sure as ... the amen in the church. "You should have just stayed." "I had things to do," she said dully, taking a sip of the whiskey. "Things? What things? "He asked, coming a few steps closer. "Oh well. First, I had to convince the family lawyers that I was not dead. Not so easy, but you'll know for sure, "she said. He shook his head, an incredulous laugh escaping him. "It was about money ?!" "Money that I need. We need that, "she said, leafing through the files. Matthew quickly came to her side to stop her, but before he could take them away, she read a name. "Friedrich Wagner? What have you got to do with him? "She asked, surprised. "You know him?" He asked in a surprised tone as well. She took a deep breath and took another sip. "Unfortunately.", She said and sat down where the files were. "That was one of the things I had to do," she said before emptying the glass. "We found a connection to Wilson Fisk." "Fisk ... this man just will not let you down, does he Matthew?" "Let's just say he does not give up. Fisk continues to turn criminal activities out of jail. Even so serious that he will probably be released next week. Wagner is one of his keymen", he said, sitting down next to her. "Not only that," she began, "Fisk is also just a chess piece, the Hand and the government," she said, picking up her cell phone. "The government? The White House? "He asked, raising an eyebrow. "Not the US government Matthew. The German government, "she said, searching for the information she had already found out. "In what way? What does the German government have to do with Fisk?" "Not directly with Fisk. It's more about us. "" Us?",he asked. "People like Jessica Jones, Luke Cage, Danny Rand, you, me and all the others. For a long time it has been seething politically between the USA and Europe. They are afraid to use us as weapons. I was in Brussels, among other places. I have reason to believe that many of the things that happened to us were not accidental." Now she got up again. "Wagner is a government spy who works with Wilson Fisk to bring down many of the" gifted "," she said. He shook his head. "I'm sorry that you have to experience it like this Matthew." "Why should I trust you ?!", he said now and got up too. "You tried to kill the others." "Because that was my job." "No, no Elektra, that was it at the beginning, but you already regained consciousness about yourself and yet you tried to kill them." Elektra sighed. "Bad decision outweigh my good Matthew. And you do not have to trust me. But if you want to survive, you should. ", She turned on her heel and wanted to go to his front door. "Where do you want to go?", He asked and followed her. "In my apartment. Why do you want to accompany me? ", She grinned again. "What are you doing?" "I will meet with Wagner. He thinks I do not know what his plan are. I'll find out what the German government has planned, and what they've already done. "She was about to leave when he grabbed her arm. "If that's true, what you're saying it would be too dangerous, if you do that Elektra. You would step into a wasp's nest by yourself. "" And who should support me? You and your friends? "She asked ironically. "My friends and I should not underestimate you that way. We've already saved New York. "" But this time it's not about a city Matthew. This time we're dealing with a whole government that's planning to kill us all because we're a threat. "" You're the daughter of a diplomat. You should know that there are wiser ways to protect yourself. "She laughed. "My father spent the day working as a diplomat, and at night he became involved in criminal activities. Not a good teacher, if you ask me, "she said and tried again to leave. "Elektra ... please.", She held back. Was that a tactic, or was she really finding a connection with him? She sighed. "Matthew. How should this work? As you by yourself said, I've been trying to kill your allies. They have no reason to trust me. You made it clear to me that you also do not do it. "" Maybe I have rashly judged. As a lawyer, I have learned one thing. There are always two sides to a medal. "" And which is my second page? "She asked with an ironic laugh and studied him. "That you are good. And want to do the right thing. "And there it was again. Matthew's desperate attempt to save her.

Hours passed. After stopping her from leaving, they talked about everything she already knew. She had discovered a network of secret spies hiding behind keymen. Her research brought her to Brussels, where she was hot on the heels of a spy who told her about Wagner. Wagner had great influence, and seemed to be behind some questionable projects. So she could trace him back to the experiments of Luke Cage. "Wait a minute, are you saying that, by order of the German government, they created Luke's powers?" He asked in confusion. "I do not think that was an authorized mission. Wagner seems to have developed his own plans, which do not coincide with those of the government. Nevertheless, he continues to work for them. He is powerful, yet a weak point. If he decides to catch a piece of cake for himself, it could be a void in the system that we can take advantage of. "Elektra took a deep breath, it was a long day, and she was slowly catching up with jet lag. Suddenly all the fatigue came, like a blow. "Matthew, it was a long day, I should go," she said, suppressing a yawn. "It's late Elektra," he said, he could not know for sure, because he could not read the time, but he had the feeling how much time had passed. "Do you want to sleep here?" It was a big step of him to offer her that. When she entered his door, he was still averse to her and now he seemed to trust her. He was even willing to work with her and let her into his life. So the bond between the two was not gone. A smile spread on her lips. "Are you offering me the couch again?", She asked, what a laugh called out to him."This time I would be willing to leave you the bedroom." "How noble of you," she said, also laughing. She was about to get up when he took her hand. "You saved me. Why? "He asked. The question was justified, after the fight of the two, she had tried to kill him and that again not. She had destroyed the elevator so that both died together. In her view, it was the only way unhindered to be together forever. But after they got a chance, she clung to the thought that there might be a life for them. And that's exactly what she explained to him. "I was ready to try Matthew. But I knew you needed your time. I knew you had to be at peace with you. Walk your paths before ours cross again. "He sighed, she could not directly tell if he was having a conflict with him, or he surrendered. "If we do this, work together and trust each other, you have to promise me one thing," he said firmly. "And that would be?" She asked. "Do not leave," he said.

[janett-marquez-17-blog]

#YDOM😟💔