#yeah im prolly never finishing this but thats fine

[iaminatree]

the horrors may be everlasting but we keep slaying

[frostbite-the-bat]

goofy ass ms paint werewolf eating a mango as a divider between the rant under this bc i do not wish to be precieved rn but i still wanna rant some thoughts out

random lovely guzma urge to delyeet everythin on myne site bc not only did i make it for petz things back when i was active between petz folks and got some encouragement there and ended up never finishing petz things for it, but i also feel horrible and uncommited for it being hosted and made on weebly and for bein too lazy to yeet my shit over to neocities just cause that shit gives me a headache and instead of getting inspired by people i feel jealous and unwelcome

also been working on my sleep schedule its a bit better now and im like. better in general now..? idk how long i can keep this up but getting up early makes me just. so tired like all day urgh i do not understand how i used to keep myself up when this tired. tired tired. brain empty. hard to do shit for long. defo needs more breaks but i swear to god everything feels like its frying my brain but i got nothin to do indoors. guess i can go draw traditionall but i end up putting such high expectations on myself i just yeah. fuck it up. get stressed. not fun. i need to stop thinking about others bc i keep thinking i put effort into smthn i need to show it off.like if i wasted time here i might as well. no this isnt showable it sucks damn it

even stuff i do draw purely for myself as self indulgent shit i go urhh this aint right

oh and then i try doin a lil excercise so im not like. physically diyng but my god that tires me out like instantly. but its okay, baby steps.

dont know what sort of place i am in mentally. the type id prolly spiral a bit over if it werent nice and 2 pm. wacky stuff. i wanna maybe do some stuff but ugh my brain just. isnt big thoughts when im tired. but honestly when am i not tired. and i am getting art done but i cant get myself to draw all day again ill end up in pain again my hand rn already is being a bit of a bitch

uhhh played pokemon in the morning but i need better pokemon already. i fuck up every raid (raids i need so i can get better mons easier) (and my shiny ralts i want easier)

hmm maybe i need a break from stuff but what kinda break what even is relaxing in my case? and "break from people" is a slippery slope of self isolation i always slip into. bit difficult to figure myself out

also, different thing, but ive been considering this for a good few months now and kinda ignoring it but i read one (1) thing and i m intrigued to do more n more research now but man do not like how moral ocd clicks perfectly with a lot of my most common issues . so i guess thats a thing to consider going into (like research) . if it helps .bc dear god i am Sensitive

but uhmmm yea sleeping better now ig like i went to sleep around ONE. my usual sleep time was 5-6 am a while ago !!!!!!! 1 am has always been my kinda usual time. man and i used to do that even when i had school and i *functioned* with less sleep. how did i do that. uhm. not well i guess

but yeah. things.. arent feeling right and i kinda wanna wipe my brain. also the neocities thing seems to be a part of my issue of (ppl who dont care abt me) r gonna thingk i suck bc i dont do (this that i find difficult) (coding) i will be exploded forever and shunned andhated

uhmmm what else yea last thought i forgot as i was gonna type it and the last thing i am deciding not to share anyway bc Shame so hooray

guy who is eeypy tired

i am just realizing how like tired i am but if i go nap ill make it worse so uhmm cope i guess lmfao at least it keeps me going to sleep at a more regular hour but like srsly brain we got around 8 hours of sleep why are you tired we used to get less and function fine. maybe not as good but we functioned

[awhst-alt]

I HAD THE BEST BYLER DREAM LAST NIGHT AND I REALLY WANNA SHARE IT WITH YOU ALL

it's so long (literally 2k words) so im gonna put it under the cut haha <3

so basically this would take place after mike and will start dating or something, idk exactly the time frame (i picture them being like 18 or something and this is the summer before college) and will goes to this summer arts program for like 2/3 months (i dunno how long american summer is but something like that) and its all the way far from home so there is dorms and stuff and he's "not in hawkins anymore" (no pun intended)

mike and will decide after will finishes his school they'd go to college together (cuz they're gonna be comic book artists together bc thats boyfriend shit) so throughout these months he's practically just waiting for will (<333333)

so one specific scene i remember from my dream involved will and mike getting off the bus to the school and then they hug and then mike grabs wills hand and brings him behind the bus and then he gives will a biggg kiss bc he won't be able to kiss him for 3 months. then they say they love each other and will gives him another quick kiss and is like "two kisses". they agree they'd call each other every day.

so will goes inside and mike goes back on the bus and goes home.

and basically the whole day is a whirl, until the end of it, in which mike is sitting in the kitchen near the phone waiting for like 3 hours for will to call, and will doesn't end up calling.

AND THEN IT GETS SPICYYYYY

so meanwhile at the arts program will asks like the front desk or something if he can call mike and they say phone is offlimits and they don't let him call mike

so then will goes to sleep and he's paranoid that he thinks mike is gonna hate him or something like that

mk than the next day in class there is this girl (they didn't reveal her name in the dream, ill call her stella) so stella is basically looking at will the entire class but will doesn't know it

so when they exit the class stella's like "hi" and will says "hi"

then stella says "i like your painting."

will is like rlly weirded out so he goes "thanks?"

"i um- hope this doesn't sound weird but i have no friends, do you want to be mine?"

"sure"

and then end of scene (this does not sound like a normal conversation but it's my dream so it doesn't have to make sense"

so BACK AT HAWKINS mike is still sleeping even tho it's like 3 pm because yk depressed boyfriend shit but then the PHONE RINGS and mike gets out of bed frantically and goes to the phone and he picks it up and is like "will?" and then it answers "it's el, idiot"

i feel like this is important for context but el speaks english very well now and hoppers back and she lives with hopper and not the byers anymore. ANYWAYS

el says "how's will?"

mike says "idk he didn't call"

"he didn't?"

"no, he didn't"

"okay. well maybe he will call later"

"yeah mb"

"wanna come over"

"ok"

so mike hangs up and gets changed and goes to el's house bc they r a couple o' besties and when he gets there it's like a therapy sessions bc mike usally talks to will every single day and he can't for like 3 months (unless will calls, but he's not going to) so he accepts he's gonna be depressed for 3 months and he's just talking to el about how he's gonna miss him so much and no be able to see his face and that shit

so el's like "well do u wanna do something to take ur mind off of him"

and mike's like "no im not gonna replace will" (I SCREAMED IN MY DREAM SRSLY)

but than el says "okay. guess im gonna go to the mall by myself" (ig starcourt is rebuilt by now)

and than mike bolts up and is like "fine"

"we can by something for will"

"okay yay"

so then they go to starcourt yasss!!

anyways back at the art school will is having lunch and stella is with he friends (even tho she said she doesn't have any friends) and one of her friends is like "omg did you see _____ he's so hot"

and another friend says "YESS! but ____ is cuter"

"what abt u stella? who do u have ur eyes on"

she says "byers" BUT NOOOOOOO WILL IS MIKES MAN

and they say "ew that kid who came back to life"

she says "yea. but he's cute, and shy, and once i wrap them around my finger i can get them to do anything"

so then she goes to sit down next to will at lunch

"hi will"

"hi"

"hru"

"im good"

"okay. good." and she gets upset because will goes ask how she is but she keeps her urging rage inside. and than they have this weird conversation and will is uncomfortable the whole time bc shes all like flirting with him and will is seeing someone obvi

but then she puts a hand on will's shoulder and he's shaking and then says something (idk what it is it wasn't explaining in my dream) then will stands up and runs to the bathroom. so he's just sitting in the stalls crying.

okay back at starcourt this part wasn't shown in my dream but im just gonna make up that mike and el go looking around starcourt for something for will (sort of like the mike/lucas/will montage where they were looking for stuff for el) and then i guess they find something for will and i don't have the slightest idea what they could have got for him BUT THEY GOT HIM SOMETHING GOOD

so mike's all happy but they'res still that depression inside of him lol

so fast forward a week, it really isn't explained but ill just make up that will still hasn't called mike, and he's super sad and all sleeping in but decides to look through his good ol binder full of will's drawings and in the arts school will and stella have a few more interactions im sure which are still very uncomfortable

okay so it's lunch again in the cafeteria and somehow will and stella are talking again but somehow it ends in stella kissing will and will like pulls away immediatley and is like "what is wrong with you!?"

and she says "what?"

"i'm seeing someone!"

"oh i uh- i didn't know."

the whole cafeteria is staring at them

so will's freaking out almost on the verge of a panic attack "idk what to do, he's gonna hate me and-"

"he?"

will has the look on his face like shit shit shit oh fuck no

"you're gay?"

"i-"

and will runs off once again. and everyone in the whole cafeteria knows that he's day and ofc with everybody being homophobic will knows it's not good at all bc everyone's gonna bully him

so then the next day he goes to class and the teacher is like "does anyone care to tell me where ___ is?" (it would be like a math question like 'where x is' but in art idkkk) and then the teacher calls on "will? can you tell me where ___ is?" and they'res a pause and then the teacher says "or perhaps you'd want to find your boyfriend instead?" (giving me anne with an e vibes prolly cuz i did a rewatch last weekend but i won't explain more in case some people haven't watched it but) anyways will stands up from his seat, everyone is looking at him, and he's shaking and so concerned but then he goes "fuck. you" badass will yeaaaa thats my boy

so then he runs out of the classroom and out of the school in a really cool montage way but then he realizes he's like 2 hours away from home but he runs and runs and he goes to a random bustop (it's not even garanteed if it takes him to hawkins but whatever) he gets on and tries to go back to hawkins.

and soon enough, he gets there, and immediatley goes to the wheelers because he needs to see mike and apologize for everything. so he's at the wheelers, and rings the doorbell, realizing he's still in his uniform lol but karen answers and mike is upstairs in his room sulking (i picture it would be 8 pm by now) so will asks for mike and karen calls mike. mike groans obviously because he doesn't know it's his boy, but he comes down, karen gets out of the way and as soon as he sees will they have a really big hug and it's super sweet and my heart UFHEIOSKA

mike says his usual "are you okay?" and mike is still confused as shit but will says "i'm sorry i'm sorry i'm sorry" and mike says "you don't have to be sorry for anyrhing" but will says "ill explain"

so then they go to will's room, side-by-side on his bed and will starts explaining everything

(this is mostly improvised by me but it's still pretty similar to the dream)

"i hated it."

"the school?"

"yeah. there was no you, (mike blushes lmao), everything was terrible, i felt so lonely, they didn't let me call you-"

"what?"

"they said the phone was off limits. i wanted to talk to you so bad and i thought you'd hate me"

"i could never hate you, will, even if i tried." will smiles

"and then there was this girl, and she hit on me and i didn't know what to do bc i'd be the face of the school if i told her i was dating you and was gay and today she kissed me"

"WHAT"

"im sorry im sorry i didn't kiss back and i was so scared bc i never was in a relationship before and i was so scared it was considered cheating-"

and mike LAUGHSS

"what? mike? what's wrong?"

"if you don't do anything back, it's not considerd 'cheating'"

"oh. good. are you mad at me?"

"what? no! no never!" so mike opens his arms and says "come here" so will and mike hug or something like that and then mike says "do you need me to beat her up?"

and will says "you can't even beat eggs. besides, your noodle arms wouldn't be able to do harm to even a fly"

so mike laughs and says "i'm glad your home"

so will blurts "i cursed out a teacher"

"you? cursing?"

"yes."

"might have to start calling you a bad boy now"

will just smiles and says "i love you"

and mike says "i love you too"

AND THEN END AND IM SO PROUD OF MYSELF BC I LOVE THIS DREAM LIKE I CAN'T BELIEVE MY BRAIN THOUGHT OF THIS BUT IM OBSESSED

ALSO ONCE I FINISH WYBMFFAE ILL PROBABLY WRITE THIS INTO A FULL BLOWN FIC BUT AHIHFUSAH

edit: i have no idea what mike did with the present him and el bought for will but i guess they ended up giving it to him lol

[tigerdrop]

If you ever write Gordon getting dicked down by benrey, I can only image benrey just losing his mind and unable to form coherent sentences just going on and on and thanking Gordon for letting him do this. Just constantly saying how good gordon is to him and thank you over and over again.

bro do i have something for u. i was going off about this exact thing just last night

what if benrey humped gordons pillow.. you know..... like a. its a. its a petplay thing okay fuckin leave me alone. gordons prolly got more than one pillow right. what if......he had his face buried in the other one (or, you know, an other one, idk) while hes doing it b/c it......smells like......gordon......

like hes on his knees bent over, going completely crazy on one pillow, while perhaps hugging his face into the other and his whimpers and moans r muffled and oh god im rabid

rotating in my mind. maybe he wouldnt have been able to get off just from that ordinarily. it was just, like, warming up. he was gonna just jack it over the pillow later (you know, b/c hes fucking gross, and maybe hes entertaining wild fantasies of marking gordons stuff. you know). but its actually gordon saying a bunch of degrading comments (and then saying that if he was a good boy, he would finish what he started) to him that pushes him over the edge and makes him able to come for real

benrey's going absolutely ape bananas on the pillow, uncoordinated and desperate to come, with gordon breathing shit like "fuck the pillow like you'd fuck me" right in his ear. gordon's crazed on the power of being able to make benrey piston faster with just a little dirty talk

god. like. the fucking groan that would rip out of him at that b/c he wants to do just that so badly. not like he can deny that thats what he was thinking about the whole time, right

benrey just starts babbling nonsense on exactly how he wants to fuck him, if he'd let him

like. if hes wanted to do just that for so long, so badly, but hes never been able to prove that hes been good enough for gordon to let him (or at least, thats what hes convinced the issue is. if its up to me, its probably bound up in gordons weird internalized homophobia issues about bottoming.......but yknow thats not the way everybody characterizes him so LOL). and he really starts rutting into it good and hard trying to prove that hed be good for gordon, hed make it real fucking good for him, and maybe if he does it right, gordon will let him fuck him just like that

seeing benrey fuck the pillow as if its actually gordon makes him feel. some kinda way. and maybe he decides afterwards or sometime soon after, he actually DOES want benrey to fuck him like that. and when it happens, hes got benrey by the leash, tugging him and instructing him on what to do, telling him hes a good boy and UH HEY why are you reading this message are you fucking homosexual or somethi

okay. so. like. thinking about. gordon finally getting over himself enough to consider letting benrey top him. but if theyre gonna do this, hes gonna be the one in control, still. otherwise whats the whole fucking point of the bit theyre doing? so hes very strictly instructing benrey what to do, making him sit there and fold his goddamn hands behind his back and not touch, not move, just sit there and watch while gordon gets himself ready, because he dont trust like that. if benrey cant behave here, now, then gordon doesnt believe hell be able to behave when benreys got his dick in his ass. its like the apocryphal "green m&ms" story - if you cant obey the little rules, then theres no guarantee that you can obey the big rules, either

so benreys just watching, and hes fucking sweating, b/c he wants to be so fucking good right now. if he doesnt behave, hes not gonna get what hes wanted for so long, and gordon sure as shit wont let him do it again. so hes patient. he pants, open-mouthed, and his dick just twitches and bobs but he doesnt touch it b/c he wasnt told to. but man, is it hard when hes watching gordon get his fingers inside himself like that. watching his face turn red, watching him sweat, wanting it to be his fingers inside gordon so goddamn badly and just make him beg for more. but hes certain he cant get away with that, so he doesnt, and he just sits there and suffers

what if when gordon first takes benrey inside him, benrey notices a look of discomfort on gordons face that remains there for a hot minute. and slightly concerned, benrey speaks up, “yo you good? do we need to sto-“ and gordon is stubborn and insists he’s absolutely fine, hes completely cool, chill, all that. and hes got this.....! yknow, horny glare on his face, showing he means business and that hes so fucking into this, just as much as benrey is

gordon coming more and more undone as he fucks his own ass, his reprieved "control" on the situation slipping, benrey's listening the best he's ever listened and all of it's making gordon so goddamn hot. he tries to make it sound authoritative when he asks benrey to fuck him, it doesn't come out that way at all but benrey's so spellbound by the permission that he doesn't notice or care. just dives right in :)

then, finally, gordon feels like hes ready, and its really obvious how embarrassed he is even when hes trying to play at maintaining control over the situation. hes saying a lot of defensive shit like "dont say anything weird, dont make any weird fucking comments, just. look. if you wanna do this, then, uh. cmon." as he gets himself on his hands and knees and tugs benrey over to him by the collar and basically presents himself to be fucking mounted, because, you know, thats what theyre doing here. thats what their whole fucking game is

now. look. my benreys got a big dick. most benreys got a big dick. this benreys got a big fucking dick and gordon knows this real well by now, so hes insistent that benrey takes it as slow as possible. and it takes every goddamn ounce of his self-control to do as gordon asks, but its so worth it, because just that slow press inside of him for the first time is so, so good. gordons unbelievably tight, and hes making choked sounds and gasping and even though hes being super bossy, hes already gagging for it, practically. and like what you said: benreys fucking desperate to rail him into the ground, but hes also deeply invested in listening to exactly what gordon says and making it as good for him as he can

and he gets himself buried to the hilt, finally, after so long hes sure hed be going soft if it wasnt gordon, if he wasnt so deeply into being bossed around like this. and gordon breathlessly tells benrey to give him a moment, jesus, let him adjust. so he waits. and he waits. until gordon tugs at his leash, and tells him to move. but slowly, okay. so benrey does as hes told, and when he hits just the right pace, gordon does him the kindness of calling him a good boy and his fingers tighten instinctively on gordons hips

thats all he fuckin wants, bro. he wants gordon to call him a good boy and let benrey fuck him silly. (theyre getting to that second one.) slowly, gordon lets him pick up the pace, and hes trying to hard to maintain control but benreys dick is ruining him. gordons legs shake, his arms start to give way, and his back dips lower and lower while he raises his ass higher. and hes so fucking vocal. so much higher and louder than when hes topping. his mouths starting to run off, ordering benrey to fuck him harder while he gives that leash a sharp tug, and "good boy" spills from his lips with a greater frequency

and benreys just pressing him further and further into the mattress, legs braced around gordons in rut like a fucking mating press, and gordons really starting to lose control over the situation. benreys asking him shit like "yo......is it good bro? am i good?" because he just wants to hear it from gordon - yeah, hes good, hes doing so good, hes a good boy. hes gordons good boy. its some of the most effusive praise benreys gotten, and it goes straight to his head. and gordons pulling that leash so fucking tight, bending benrey over his back, while his orders for benrey not to stop begin to bleed into pleas and his babblings starting to get incoherent. and when hes like "please, oh god, im gonna come," benrey goes for the extra credit and reaches around to jerk him off and gordon just breaks

starts hardcore running his mouth and begging benrey to come in him, god, he can bite a little if he wants, its okay, just keep going, and gordon comes with the loudest wail benreys ever drawn out of him. and hes so overstimulated but he meant it when he said he wanted benrey to fuck him until he came, so hes mumbling about how good benrey is for him deliriously until benreys telling him thank you over and over again as he comes deep inside gordon. and then he pulls out and starts licking gordon and nuzzling his head into him and other gay shit while gordon pats his head and weakly reiterates that, yes, he was a good fucking dog and he did very fucking well, thank you

My Final Message. Good bye

[svyxae]

oh wow a tag look at that

Tagged by: this butt @nottodaay

Answer these questions about yourself and tag people!

ABOUT YOU

Hair Color? Natural, dark brown, right now, roots be rose gold-ish, rest is like a....faded, lavender thing?

Is your hair long or short? short, but i do miss my long hair so

Eye Color? brown with a green circle around the pupil so...hazelnut? idk tbh

Blood Type? UUUH I THINK I AM AB+...IM A + SOMETHING

Nickname(s)? Jess, Dama, RB (PS4 related)

Relationship Status? Single like a SINGLE KRAFT AYOO

Pronouns? She/Her

Tattoos? NONE but i do want some, im just not sure what or where :D

Piercings? my ear lobes even if i dont put on earrings c:

Do you want (more) piercings or tattoos? yes to tattoos

Right or Left handed? Right

Zodiac? .......Aquarius, idk how to know my rising sun...moon or other things

RIGHT NOW, WHAT ARE YOU….

Eating? just ate a bowl of chocolate ice cream

Drinking? might get some water or iced tea idk yet

Listening to? nothing beside my typing and clicking away on my mouse lmao

About to watch? youtube

Waiting for? time to go sleep soon, in like, a 1H hkjkjljl

THE LAST…

Phone Call? Mom

Text Message? best friend

Song you listened to? on the internet it was K/DA, on my phone it was We Are by Woo Won Jae

Time you cried? like,,,,,,,,2 days ago, i was finishing reading House of Cards by sugamins gjhkjlljk ITS SUCH A GOOD FIC PLIS MAKE A SEQUEL WHERE JK, JIMS AND TAE LIVE TOGETHER AGAIN UGH MY UWUS

HAVE YOU EVER…

Dated someone twice? i never,,,,truly dated so no

Kissed someone and regretted it? never kissed LKFJKLJH

Kissed a stranger? nah

Been cheated on? nah cause ya gurl never been on a true daaate

Had sex on a first date? LMAOOO

Lost someone special? some family members

Been depressed? not to the point of not getting up or things like that, i would say feeling down more than depressed

Drank hard liquor? i,,,,,drank a few,,,,,,,rhum shot in my life,,,,,,,thats about it

Gotten drunk and thrown up? i dont drink :)))))

Talked to a person named Tom? no?

Had surgery? nah

Lost your glasses? nope

Turned someone down? not sure?

Broken someone’s heart? prolly

Had your heart broken? YES

Been arrested? No

Cried when someone died? IM A HUGE CRYBABY I CRY FOR NOTHING

Fallen for a friend? nah but they all cute

IN THE LAST YEAR, HAVE YOU…

Made new friends? hella

Fallen out of love? Not sure what that one means

Laughed until you cried? ALWAYS

Found out someone was talking about you? oh gosh i hope so gjlgjkl

Met someone who changed you? YEEEE BOI

Found out who your friends are? oh god yes i did

Kissed someone on your Facebook friends list? Not yet -WINKWONK- im kidding,,,,,,he might never kiss me ;n;

FAVORITE…

Drink? ICED TEA, WATER, MILK, BUBBLE TEAS

Color(s)? pink, white, black, gold, rose gold, red, purple, green, basically, all colors

TV Show(s)? MOORIM SCHOOL, HWARANG (I NEED TO FINISH IT) GRAVITY FALLS

Sport(s)? what the fuck is a sport?

Movie(s)? HARRY POTTERS, MAZE RUNNERS, UNDERWORLDS, WALT DISNEY MOVIES, X-MENS, THE MUMMIES

Actor(s)? ORLANDO BLOOM WOWOWO, and many more

DO YOU BELIEVE IN…

Miracles? not sure

Love at first sight? yes, it just need to happen HE JUST NEED TO SEE ME

Santa Claus? i used to, THANKS MOM

Kissing on a first date? if it went swell, maaaybe??

Angels? i mean, its hard, but my mom is convinced i have a guardian angel so??

Yourself? OH LOOK AT THE TIME, NEXT QUESTION

WHICH IS BETTER?

Hugs or Kisses? HUGS

Lips or Eyes? eyes uwu

Shorter or Taller? taller, plis im the short one in my group of friends

Older or Younger? i go for older, but 2 years younger is fine

Nice arms or nice stomach? ARMS OOOOOOOH GIMME THOSE FLEXXXX

Hookup or relationship? Relationship

Troublemaker or hesitant? ‘’Heard u like bad boys’’ ‘’yes..?’’ ‘’well not to sound like ill be in trouble or anything but i go to bed at 9pm -winkwonk-’’ ‘’!!!!!’’ i actually dont know kljhkghj

RANDOM

What’s your best friend’s name? ALEXA AND CLARE WADDUP

What is something you can’t wait for? Christmas i think? not sure myself hklhjk

What time did you wake up today? around 8:30...9?

Do you want to change your name? i mean, Jessica is okay i guess, but i dont like it, i was supposed to be named Alice, which i think is waaay cooler

What did you do for your last birthday? i legit, dont remember, beside celebrating with the fam

What were you doing at midnight last night? ASLEEP

What is something that gets on your nerves? my anxiety

Do you have a crush on someone? YES

What’s your most visited website? this bumb af website, instagram and FB

Where do you want to go on vacation? I would like to go in Italy, prolly with @malik-zaki go back to France cause 1 day wasnt enough, and just, Europe/Asia mostly

What kind of trainers do you like/wear? Vans

How many Facebook friends do you know IRL? all of them lmao

Do you have pets? NO CAUSE IM ALLERGIC TO FUR AND FEATHERS

Do you want to get married? yeah prolly

What career do you want to have? i really love history, soooo, maybe something related to that

What is something you want? i’d like to have a boyfriend, a good one where i’ll be comfortable with him

What do you like about yourself? my eyes hkghkl, the fact that i have a big heart to welcome all the love of my friends and that i can give loads of love to all of them uwu

im tagging uuuuh @malik-zaki @matoki-princess @k-pop-potato @smiley-yoongi now u really have to do it cause me and karlene tagged you, thats it???

[argaliaofficial]

i started typing this earlier but then had to go to work so now im just gonna finish it so i get it off my chest

back when i was with my first ex, meg, we went to this private christian school i prolly made a post about this on here before but its topical right now i didnt sleep at all and im tired enough to spill my fucking guts out some more 

so anyway we went to this private christian school and thats when it happened. ive honestly repressed a lot of my time there i was not doing great but what i do remember just makes me feel sick. like, meg aside, the school just sucked. 

for context the way it was set up was that we had “placement tests” to see where we were in subjects like math and english, and however we did made us get placed in PACEs according to our skill level. in theory this is fine i suppose, but the thing was that there were no alternatives to the PACEs. 

PACEs were part of the learning curriculum of our school which was ACE- Accelerated Christian Learning. they were basically little study pamphlets that went over instructions on how to learn certain subjects and whatnot, while also having a christian perspective on things. scripture verses were abundent in them, and they had like a continuous series of comics going in there about their character Ace Virtuson and friends. 

Along with the PACEs, the classrooms were set up like an “office” of sorts with cubicles that you sat in. For me honestly that was one of the many hells because it was so cramping and clinical and I just do not learn well in that sort of environment. so you’d sit quietly for like 8 hours a day with occassional breaks with nothing but your PACE pamphlets to work on. you couldnt speak to any body, and if you needed help, there was a flag system in place where you’d put a flag up and have to sit around and wait for a teacher to come assist you, and usually their assistance only lasted briefly because theres countless OTHER students to get to, and nepotism is a thing and if they dont like you or think of you as a problem kid, you’re less likely to get the aid you need.

i was one of those problem kids. 

early on, i could manage that set up when my work was easier, but when i hit “high school age” and got into more advance work i began to suffer horribly. it didnt help that at this time, i got with meg, but less about her right now and more about how this school system fucking failed me and others tbh 

i do not learn by reading information. at least, i dont retain it. i need to discuss with people, with my peers and professors. i need one on one sometimes, especially with math- my biggest struggle. but how the school was set up made that sort of learning almost impossible. your peers were all at different levels, so group discussion was rare. their were attempts, but they never lasted long, and the extent of the help basically surmounted to the teachers just reading what the PACEs already said and vaguely explaining more, and that blew. 

so, me, being a hands on group learner who has to talk and listen to even retain information and needs to be allowed to move around often instead of being cramped up, started to fall behind in my studies. badly. and of course, instead of the teachers trying to asses WHY it was you were falling behind, you got written up and had to have your parents sign a slip. you could get written up for a few things and these were always detentions of sorts. usually they were lunch but if you were bad enough you’d get an after school one. i accumulated these almost once a day and after a while i got tired of having my parents sign them EVERY SINGLE day and just forged their signatures. i got away with that like 75% of the time lol 

like they were just for the same shit ‘oh ur kid didnt do their homework blah blah ur kids out of dress code blah blah” and so i was just “whatever” because like... nothing seemed to change i was just being perpetually punished for being unable to keep up in my studies. my parents tried to get a math tutor for me but halfway thru i think freshman year she moved and that was that

i got so fucking sick of just being behind while my other peers seemed to be moving forward that i started bullshitting my work just to get thru. ofc that didnt do anything because i wasnt learning the work, and because i lied about my answers and cheated i got punished again. and i was just like “whatever” 

i cried all the time. parent teacher conferences were hell. i always cried. it felt like i couldnt convey to them why i was such a fuckup. like i wasnt making sense, or i was being overemotional. instead of trying to make changes they just talked about how i had to work harder. least i think. i’ll be honest i always just disassociated during those meetings before going into meltdown mode.

on top of that, i was in a “gay” relationship with a classmate, and lots of bad stuff happened. ive always had an overactive imagination. great for being a wannabe artist. not so great when youre already an easily manipulated undiagnosed autistic child. me, her, and my current gf actually had our own little world! thinking back on this now, for me at least it was escapism to try and just cope with how miserable i was at school 

i dont know how soon in the “relationship” it was before things got sexual. my concept of time during those years at foursquare is so scattered. according to posts ive seen on dA me and her were together or at least “friends” for 2 years? so actually i think my saying “freshman year in high school” is inaccurate and things got bad the tail end of middle school and continued until i was a sophomore before switching schools.

ANYWAY, so yeah, along with all this school nonsense, i was in a gay relationship, one that was abusive in many aspects. ofc at the time i didnt know that i was being abused! i just thought yknow her forcing herself into me sexually was kinda par the course and i was already kinda a sexually curious kid growing up so like.. i was looking for that i guess? it hurting cuz she went in dry is just to be expected, yadda yadda. pretty sure i cried? and i know for a fact that i still sleep in the room where she raped me like that and its sometimes just “yea i was literally right in that spot when i was raped lol”

and she would constantly want me to touch her sexually too, and when i said “no” and pulled my hand away that she had been trying to force down her pants because i wasnt personally ready to do that she’d always complain and make me feel bad cuz i wasnt comfortable touching her. “i always get you off but you never get me off!” 

and at the time i didnt just tell her to fuck off cuz i didnt know any better. i didnt know that it was ok for me to not be ready to do that. i thought i was a bad person for not being ready to pleasure my partner, even tho its not my fault if shes ok w/ pleasuring me, and im ok with being pleasured (even tho tbh it was hit or miss sometimes she just did it lol), but im not ready to touch her, i guess? and like i tried to communicate with her and im pretty sure i told her that if she didnt wanna jerk me off cuz i couldnt do it to her yet that was fine but whatever

on the fourth of july she started groping me out in public while we watched the fireworks and i remember trying to get her to stop cuz i wasnt comfy with doing this in public cuz a) this was years ago and homophobia was a lot more common especially in this boonies town and b) i dont like seeing other couples being handsy in public so i dont want to be handsy in public either

and i remember while shes groping my chest and im trying to get her to stop theres this group of older kids in front of us and they see. and they start snickering. they started snickering at the sight. and i was so mortified and wanted to die.

looking back those kids should get hit by a fucking bus for laughing at someone getting molested and being obviously uncomfortable with it but i guess its funny cuz “lesbians! haha look at that pervy lesbo touching that other lesbian!”

and thats the story of why every fourth of july i want to kill myself

things kept progressing, ofc. i remember one night, while we were camping, i finally caved and fingered her. i forced myself to think “yeah ok i can do this” and i just thought the crippling anxiety i felt was cuz i was nervous to be intimate with my girlfriend for the first time like this, but really i was probably scared she was gonna hurt me since by that point she had. she had made herself perfectly clear in her mannerisms and tone of voice that she was stronger and bigger than me and could hurt me. 

and a few occasions she did. one time she started choking me so badly that i honestly thought “oh my god, shes going to kill me here at school”. i still sometimes feel her nails digging into my throat, and i dont think ive ever been as terrified in my life as i was in that moment. i dont think she would have stopped had a teacher not intervened. 

there was only one time i ever hit her, and that was before school started, and i had finally lost my shit over how much she kept fucking with me. all i remember was i came to school angry at her. over what i dont remember. she was always toying with my emotions, and i think that it had built up over the time that i finally snapped walked into class before school started, walked over to where she and alyss were talking, and a slapped her across the face before i walked over to my desk

i dont think i got in trouble for that cuz no one snitched? idk i mightve, but i didnt care. i was angry at her, angry at the school, and suicidal. 

i remember one time during a break i was crying. a teacher from another class came up to me and asked what was wrong. i told her i wanted to die. she just looked at me all uncomfortable. i think she mightve said something before walking off?

nothing came of that. 

i was more worried that i would get in trouble for being in a gay relationship than as apposed to thinking that these teachers- people who are supposed to protect their students- would help me. i gave up on them even recognizing the signs of me being abused. i feel like they wouldnt have even taken it as seriously as we were both “girls”, and this was back before talk of how women can be abusive was more common place. abuse was still strictly seen as male on female violence. and to some people, gay violence was comedic. 

eventually, one night, it all came to light. at least, that she and i were sexually involved. that week was a blur. she was taken out of school. it was brushed under the rug. everyone trying to save face i guess and keep other kids from finding out, but somehow i always felt like they knew. they knew that she was taken out of school because of me. because we were gay

i tried to move on, but my studies never got better. i just grew more jaded. i never did any work. i mouthed off to the teachers, continued getting detentions and just plainly stopped caring. no one could get me to do anything. i would play hooky. 

and that was just.... my life. perpetual anger at a system that failed me spectacularly. to this day i still hate that place. i cant be there. i was groped and molested and it was treated like nothing

so yeah

thanks for listening to my ted talks

[thatgirlwhoworksforwhatshew-blog]

tarak,

lets not beat around the bush, i miss you. like alot.

im not even going to get into what are the things that keep reminding me of th time we had, because thatd be me listing out my every minute of the day. yes, there are times when i remember you not for the good-reasons, but mostly i end up wanting to think of you instead of living in such a denial of ‘im over you’.

i know you must be going through alot, im not trying to compare us here, on who is feeling it more deeply, quality and quantity- how much ever of a utilitarian i claim to be, i want to be stupidly selfish enough to say i feel it hit me very hard. especially when i see people around me claim their relationships to be like the epitome of perfection and love, i just cant help but think of the beautiful masterpiece we could have made together. 

they say ‘chaos brings art’., that, time will tell. until then, ill just sit around and feel things like how its supposed to be.

i hope its not that hard on you.whom am i kidding, how much ever i convince myself that you will get over me, by pouring alot of ‘hate’ like how your friends wanted you to, im still silly enough to hope that you wouldnt be that harsh on me. gosh, this is never going to happen is it? im only going to die in dissapointment of letting things go this far, and getting nothing in return(when i now have the chance) or do i?

i know you, i know the charm, i know how you effect people, and how much ever stupid and goofy you get around me, i know what you are- or atleast i knew. why did we let things go this recklessly? i was immature, but why dint we sort things out then and there. gosh, i just cant look at the word jodhpur without a little guilt., i cannot look at any word starting with a T, and has both R and K. 

do you have any idea how many songs have the word tara, taraka, in them? its like some stupid prank someone is pulling on me. my mom also began to ask me how youre doing, she out of everyone, made an assumption that my mood is practically proportional to my time on my phone and phone calls, which basically is only with you. so she goes like “oh, tarak dint call today” after few days, she began to wonder if things were fine with you, and i burst out angrily, that ‘you should be fine because youre avoiding me’. please be true! anyway, i dont care where this questioning is coming from, but i reasoned out how this equation of my good moods being equated with our calls, was a little irring in the beginning, because i dont think i need some ONE person to keep me happy. it was a troubling thought which i used to hold a grudge on myself for depending on you for what ever greedy reasons. but i began to realise how first, that wasnt the case. i wsnt greedy on this reason, i was just looking for a support and a person to share my happiness with. i was greedy maybe when it came to things like, eventhough i knew it was hard for you, i was still there poking things and making it harder for you. TO THE EXTENT THAT YOU NOW BLOCKED ME. WOW. im not blaming you, maybe you did the right thing. maybe if you dint do that, we could have pulled each others hair out in this menace. but did we really do the right thing if i am feeling this way right now? whats the point tarak?

its 10:10 right now. wow. 

honestly, there are times when i thank myself for this space, because i really enjoy doing things for myself, but by the end of the day, i really hoped that youd call or email, so that i could tell you about all the amazing things i read, watched, discovered and i desperately want to share them with you, but i cant!

i got back to my bubble, my day basically revolves around reading and arranging my library. i still hold heidi close to myself when i sleep every night. i really regret not finishing it for you. but i dont know how much meaning she hold to you anyway. shes my world, she is the first thing i was obsessed with, and i thought she’d bring you similar joy, but now we never know i guess.

ive been doing philosophy for NET, although i havent started in serious mode, illl get there soon. i applied for an internship navdhanya, and have made plans of what to do with life., quite roughly. i even made a bucket list, of things i should try, filled with things that fascinate me. sample, fireflies. i never saw them in real life. and now i feel bad just by that thought. but yeah, i was pretty serious wheni made that list, and i keep adding things into it every now and then. i dont know why i mentioned this now, but i felt like it. ohh, since im updating about life, i should mention how i spoke to dad(basically, a mail) about most of the things i could never say to him, mostly stressing on how now i should be left unbothered. 

since i couldnt give rockstar another chance, sorry boss, the thought of having to go through that actress’ bad acting for three hours was itself torturous., i found the screenplay/script of the movie., and let me tell you how good i felt after reading it. i had better actors in my mind, and i dreamt about it for a couple of nights. it was a rollercoaster. i think screenplays do that to you. its like reading the book instead of watching the movie, but rockstar has to do with the songs, and since i had a clue about them, i can justify now. and i think i understand you better now, but i dont know, my timing of watching the movie is like another satire. not just this one, many more. gosh, i have like an entire saga of things i could use to cry over to. the other day, i cried while reading tagore poetry, although that was a worthy reason, its crazy how i dont know what little thing could be a trigger.

but how much ever i might try to romanticize all of this, tarak, i really think apart from the happy and goofy times we spent, which dont actually matter as much if we look back(except for nostagia purposes) id say we both needed a better versions, and both of us seperately too needed to be honest with what we are.. not just in showing the other person. im talking about myself mostly. and, for what ever we had, id hate to call it, but because of the lack of a better word, lets admit, we were toxic. and i have to say, how much ever you tried to get over your ego and wanted to be a feminist, looking back at minute details of the interactions we had, plus from the ones you talk about to others, i realised how often there were times when you basically preached something and failed to follow. im slightly ashamed to admit this, but i have gone through a phase of man-hating when i realised the things i have seen around,  thats basically when i realised how these could be the things you failed to see, (and prolly reasoned out for good enough reasons) but somewhere deep inside, i know its not so.like i read it in some book, (which bt the way, i should say felt like i was reading line by line about you) because it talks about how men who seem woke, but still choose to do the same thing, although for different reasons(or so they claim) is another result of the system. and i just cringed at this thought. because im sorry, but i felt it multiple times in our stay together. 

tarak, honestly how much ever im loving reading and researching, im afraid im getting very theoretical. now i cannot stop myself from pin pointing mistakes in everything, and am clearly missing out the beauty in things. if i learned one thing, love is for people who want to give up reason. if you are too calculated and stubborn, you can never love. im not saying im getting calculated and all brains-no-heart, but im slanting that way, and im just afraid i might never find redemption because i like this more. id choose this over love. for now. im sure time will prove me different, but let me tell you how much i value reading and art.

i guess we never spoke about this, why did we not? 

you know the whole ‘books are my bestfriends’? this is literally my life summarized. in my entire time at indus, i basically spent most of the time in the library, or in the washroom- where i used to sneak in, to bunk science classes. i had a reading tree also. under which i used to read in the sports period. prajeeth was a science guy, and the labs were right opposite to the library, so he used to keep a check on me, i often got late to catch my evening bus, so he’d make sure i dint. not to forget the music room. that was another room i spent some quality time in. while the library was in the first floor of the new building, the music room was in a circular room, on the terranc. the whole terrace was for music and art. we had a lot of empty open area where we were given assignments in. i love that place. id want to take you there one day, if, you know... 

so as i was saying, i just prefer reading and listening over anything. at this point, it feels like i know nothing apart from these both. i know you wouldnt agree with me being a good listener, but i know me, and i know im good.

well, now about us, i dont know. i really dont. i may say id be happy if you move on, and find yourself a woman, but i dont know if i can say it at this point, when im clearly meaning it. so, i can only hope for you to become a stronger person, collecting yourself from all of the past. and if you’re moving on, good for you., but id like to take my own sweet time with my memories of you,us, and laugh cry cringe all at once slowly. im not sating im attempting to get over you, because somehow that is making me think about you even more, and its actually making me want you for a whole different list of reasons. ill stick to this natural flow, and ill see you when i see you, years from now, or maybe more. somehow in the midst of some really stupid portions, there are some things you set a high limit in, for men to fill in- who might enter my life. so its going to be a big deal if i commit to someone tarak, and id still want to share about it with you, i dont know if that comes out from mere friendship or more, but i dont mind either ways.

i want to say this one last thing, because ive been wanting to say it for a long time, after the phone call.

it might be years later that we meet,and finally talk, when ever it is, how ever long it has been, if you turned out a good man, not just rational and responsible but realist and a romantic., id love for me to fall for you all over again, or maybe fall correctly* this time, until then ill wait.

 i want to wait. 

that’s me. there are surely many more things i want to say, but i will wait, like i said, and its not like youre going to read this, so its fine. ill look forward for what is coming, i hope you are healthy and are fine (at the least). i miss akbar, i hope aunty is not having a hard time seeing you break down anymore, i hope thats not the case, dont cry tarak! did you stop smoking? i was thinking about it on the 26th, i hope youre sticking to your resolution. i miss the smell of it, i sometimes open my specs-case to smell it, and it reminds me alot of you and red rum. its amazing. i miss it all, i miss you guys alot, i miss you babu. take care. 

xo

raaga.

[survivemiddleearth]

Episode 1: “Hobbits, we gonna slay this all the way to Isengard.” -JG

I’m back and better than ever!

Heylo! Who loves a pre-game confessional oh we do! I cannot wait for this season to be honest. I am finishing a season as we speak being in the final 3 so the adrenaline rush and hype is so real. I am a not a super fan of LOTR but I do love and enjoy the the stories. I read the books when I was in second grade and the saw the movies for the first time in 7th grade. My goal is to be like Frodo in this game, make myself known when it's really important and needed, then disappear when I am not, why make a target on myself when I don't need to. Hopefully the power of the ring won't consume and something wild happens.... eeks here goes nothing, FOR MIDDLE EARTH!

Ahh fuck Johnny is in this game he's gonna betray me I know it fml I just wanna win an org how hard omfg

This is my first org in 5 months and honestly I forget how to play. I'm just gonna do whatever and I do how I do, but I'm not gonna be scared to yeet people out of here.

Part of my strategy is to try and be social to everyone in the beginning. I want to try and have a conversation with everyone on my tribe as soon as possible and try to gain a slight favor so people think I have something to contribute to them if we happen to lose the first immunity challenge and go to tribal

First confession of a new game is always a lot. I haven’t played since…March? Maybe even earlier than that. And if you know me, you know there’s been a lot of drama surrounding me since then, so I’m definitely nervous to be back in the saddle and playing again. Pre-merge queen. Basically, on my tribe, I feel…neutral to nervous. I have Dylan R, who is my ORG child, so I should be able to work with him fairly easily. I’ve also hosted Eric, which could be good if he weren’t friends with so many people who don’t like me. Same boat with Vi. I’m hoping I can kind of work both of them to my side, but it might not be possible and I may just have to rely on Dylan keeping me in the loop. There’s also a newbie, which is usually a good sign. Finally, we have Johnny. I FEEL like Johnny has an issue with me from something, but I’m not 100% sure. I love reaching a point in my life where I can’t remember who hates me and why, but, hey, that’s running and destroying the biggest ORG series since Mains for you. As for the other tribes……..yikes on a bike. Aside from Zach, JG, and Stephen (more of my sons), we’re fairly stacked with people who would cut my throat without a second thought. Drew has seen me play before and we had a, uh, messy relationship in that game. I’m certain Sammy still hates me from Lago and also from The Drama since he’s friends with the core few people who hate me. Nick I don’t know, but he has “skinny” in his bio as a positive which means we probably won’t get along, plus he came from tengaged which can be a yikes. Crow I hosted for like three seconds in Emathia, so maybe he’ll have mercy on me. Dennis I think hates me from the Athena stuff. Bodhi I think hates me, and I’m not wild about him either. Roxy I know hates me but I don’t have any idea why since we’ve never spoken. Probably just more Athena Stuff. Hopefully I make merge with JG. That’s going to be my big hope for this season. Well. Idol hunting is going to be my lifeblood. Wish me luck, unless you hate me like everyone else.

So Drew in this game? Kill me with an axe right now. What the fuck is JG doing here? I'm finished, I was going to play nice but THREE zwooper people are on my tribe. MESS.

Small tribe, which means riskier tribals early on but its easier to get to know everyone. So far Roxy and.. dnn??? I like (I’ll check the cast reveal for what we should be calling dnn). JG and Sammy I know from other games, I feel I can trust JG a little, we’ll see. Sammy I don’t know I like to give people clean slates but almost every game we’ve been in he’s gone straight for me. Bodhi hasnt messaged me back yet :/

Hello ! Welcome to my first confession. Excited to exist. I haven’t met everyone in the tribe yet but I am playing with my old host so that’s funny. I don’t really have any interesting things to say so just. Hello. The first immunity challenge is one that I really didn’t do well in the first time I played so. Yikes. Whatever I’m still excited !!

Well hey! Got a clue on my very first idol hunt? But in a series so aggressively dominated by men, where the hell is "sisterhood" supposed to take me?

Honestly, I did not want to do the first challenge. I know I am good at it, but I didn't want to be the one responsible for losing for the tribe since its a hero challenge. I made up an excuse which is not a lie and is at the same time. Hopefully our tribe does well at the challenge!

This game so far is really stupid, I mean no talking during heats is fine but the fact that my tribe didn't offer any condolences or anything like "you tried" is rude and frankly, tragic.

You ever agree to face an Australian in an endurance challenge at midnight your time, 2pm his time? What a disaster for me

What are half the things mentioned here. Like what's a hobbit. I know its a movie but like, really? There better not be a quiz on LOTR or I am getting last place.

Yas!!! I love getting lucky and being on a winning tribe. First immunity lets go hobbits, we gonna slay this all the way to Isengard. So far I've mingled and stayed for tea with my hobbits and gotten to know them. Of course I'm excited to play with Stephen again, cool to finally meet Roxy and Bodhi. We shall see what will happen I'm anxiously, excitedly nervous. But let's go!

You know the most embarrassing part of losing that comp in 2 seconds? The fact that I almost called in sick to work bc I wanted to free my schedule for the day. Yeah that was a flop. If I get eliminated first that would be simultaneously hilarious and also very depressing. No one other than Eric and Jay have messaged me so I should probably like. Pop in and say hi

watches crow flop

My tribe is so...INACTIVE.

In this immunity challenge, I have no other option but to beat Vi if i dont, I will lose my spot in this game, I swear on it

Im deciding if I should tell Crow Run wants him out. I like Run but I gotta cover myself...

So uh...it’s kinda fuckin wild. We lost and don’t really have an easy vote because everyone’s active and ready to play the damn game. I’m fairly certain there’s a large majority though I don’t think anyone will be absolutely shocked about who goes home.

I'd like to start this seasons confessionals of with saying that I absolutely hate Bodhi. Since he took my Tom Bombadil and then told me, he had forgotten that he was cast for this season... LIKE COME ON ARE YOU SERIOUS, THATS MY AVATAR. After calming down I saw the tribe I was on. Bodhi (AJUSNKDIKWQJNE), Roxy, Sammy, Stephen and JG. I have played loads with Sammy and Roxy before. Stephen seems nice. Bodhi must die and JG is prolly the hardest person to talk to since I was in kindergarten. I mean. It should be that hard to give proper answers to your questions. MAYBE it was because he was busy playing the inferior BR game fortnite, but still come ON. I agree to play the challenge, but didn't need to actually do something in it, since Stephen and Sammy beasted it. The idolsearch first went SUCKY. because I went to bree ignored Aragorn, got durnk and got a 35 % DISADVANTAGE ON MY NEXT CHALLENGE (LIKE WHO THOUGHT OF THAT HIGH NUMBER) then at my next search I find out, that the other option I had, prolly would've given me an Idol... OH MAN PLEASE DONT LET IT BE GONE I WANT THAT.

You know I'm winning when my tribe wins immunity. Time to take the free time to make an alliance of my own. I have to choose who I want to trust for now.

okay so i haven’t made a confessional yet but I’m super excited to see some familiar faces in the game. I’ve played with Dennis before but I know that if I’m a threat to his game he will take me out so it’s a good person to stick with for now but idk if I can trust him in this game. JG is very friendly and chill but I’ve onkg played another game with him where he quit. He had a lot going on so I understood but I’m willing to work with him again if he’s willing. ROXY IS ON MY TRIBE AND SHE IS THE LOVE OF MY LIFE AND I KNOW SHE WILL NEVER VOTE ME OUT. SO I GOT HER AND IM EXCITED. Okay and who else? oh yes Stephen! Stephen is cool and I’m 100% down to work with him despite our past in orgs. I just don’t want him to think of me as an enemy. If we have to boot out someone I’d say bodhi would be the most obvious choice because he hasn’t been active...but bodhi is a fun player to play with I’m just hoping he becomes more active before our tribe decides to give him the boot. I see Crow in this game and he’s super nice and I’m so glad I’m playing with him and also Johnny is playing and I’m hoping he’s gonna want to work with me. Okay okay I’m done for now. Let the games begin.

CRAP i forgot to talk about immunity and idol search...okay sooooo i went heat 2 after Stephen won heat 1 and like i was expecting to be targeted bc if I won, my tribe would get immunity. However Dylan(I’m sorry if i umm spelled that wrong) forgot the period and Crow spoke out of turn or something and I won...I was shocked but glad that it didn’t last as long as the first heat. Oh and I searched for the idol and went to the bar or something and it turns out the item i was gonna get had been snatched before I had a chance....WE GOTTA THIEF IN HERE....I’m just trying to make it to merge so i need any advantage i can get.

Johnny just approached me for an alliance and I told him, "of course johnny! :)" But I am internally screaming like "nooooooo why meeee," because just before this game we were talking about how Johnny likes to betray everyone in orgs so now I'm like, please just let me win one org I got Ryan V casted in Bermuda you owe me.

The nice thing about not going to tribal council is that it really gives you the time to flex that social game and work on building up relationships, which is super important early in the game.

me doing this 4 hours before tribal is a mood but uhm ahem in conclusion, i've heard 8 names this round and let me breakdown how and why begin: i tell nick i think first boot should be someone who didn't compete, and then narrow it down to jayden or zach nick tells me he's been pushing for jayden and that drew is on board and is working on zach jayden comes to me saying he knows he's in trouble and asking me what to do, he reveals that runs ratted out nick about targeting him i tell nick runs ratted him out nick reveals to me that runs has been pushing me to everyone (confirmed by Drew, and later Jayden, as well) i confront rataways subtly and he insinuates that his loyalty is to me and that we're friends and my BS alarm goes flying off the charts rataways thinks he's sly but he's not end: im voting rataways and got confirmation from jayden and drew that they'd do the same....currently working on nick who has supposedly already told zach to vote runs as well if everybody minus rataways isn't a completely shady bitch, this should be an easy 5-1 with rataways thinking he somehow has votes on me and i'll probs get idoled out but w/e. i'm not going to lose my sanity trying to beg rataways not to vote me, idc. oh and i threw the immunity challenge cuz tribal seemed fun (and boi it is!)

Well I wasn’t the first person evicted so I consider this season an accomplishment. I’m trying to attach myself to Ford, since he’s completely new.

Alright hold on a second. 2nd day. 2nd conversation with JG. AND its like day & night. He seems pretty chill :). MAYBE HE WAS JUST BUSY WITH FORTNITE (what I as a gamer understand. I mean.. you gotta set priorities.. right?). Just wanted to clarify, so I don't come over as a dick at the end of the season. In case we end up being best friends *shrugs*

[unlikely-savage]

Xavier: -clears work off coffee table and throws it under something somewhere-

Xavier: -puts champagne glasses and snacks on coffee table-

Xavier: Okay I think that's everything.

Aurora: *smiles and hugs him from behind* You're such a good host. It's really cute

Xavier: I'm just nervous your friend will hate me. -sighs-

Lux: *walking with Rosemary* What if I dont get along with your friend's boyfriend?

Lux: What if hes a republican?

Aurora: Dont worry, silly! *turns him around and kisses his nose* she'll love you! I havent met her boyfriend yet though

Rosemary: If h-he's a republican th-then we can both tell A-Aurora she needs to s-stop seeing him. -nods before giggling-

Xavier: -pecks aurora on the lips and smiles- As long as he isn't republican it'll all be fine.

Lux: *smiles* Can we get into an argument with him first if he is? I'd like to at least mess with him a little *nudges her and laughs*

Aurora: *lightly hits his arm* even if he is, be nice!

Xavier: If he's a republican, no promises.

Rosemary: -bites her lip and giggles when they get to the door- -rings doorbell-

Aurora: Ill get it! *runs to door and opens it*

Lux: *holds up bottle of wine* Greetings!

Xavier: -walks behind her and goes to the door-

Xavier: -wide eyes- Lux?!

Rosemary: -looks at Lux and then Xavier- Y-You two know e-each other? -confused face-

Lux: *blinks then smiles* Xavier! I didnt know this was your place! *walks in and gives him a bro hug*

Aurora: Oh uh *smiles* I guess we can skip that intro then! Uh Rosemary, this is Xavier, Xavier this is Rosemary

Xavier: -bro hugs- Good to see you! So I see you're doing well then. -chuckles and nods at Rosemary and holds out a hand for hi to shake- Hi.

Rosemary: -blinks and shakes Xavier's hand- H-Hello.

Xavier: Come on in. -leads everybody into apartment and closes the door-

Rosemary: -walks in and is prolly standing awkwardly coz shes rosemary- S-So how do y-you guys kn-know each other?

Lux: *smiles at Xavier* lets just say, we helped each other out

Aurora: *clasps her hands together* Oh well how wonderful! I'm so glad everyone can get along now

Xavier: Wait. I never asked. Lux, you aren't a republican, right?

Rosemary: -starts giggling and ends up laughing like a maniac bc thats what lux was worried about-

Lux: *laughs with Rosemary and leans on her for support because hes laughing so much* Oh god *wipes eye* never. I'd rather lose my magic

Xavier: -looks at them like they're crazy but chuckles- Good.

Aurora: *giggles* See, Xavier? Nothing to worry about

Xavier: Right. -smiles and throws an arm around her shoulders-

Aurora: *grabs Rosemary's hand and starts yanking her into the kitchen* Come on! Help me finish up the food

Rosemary: -is dragged to the kitchen- B-But I c-can't cook!

Aurora: *giggles* Thats alright! That's what magic is for

Lux: *stands there with Xavier and chuckles* I see you worked out your woman troubles

Rosemary: -goes into kitchen and sighs- B-But I don't h-have magic!

Xavier: -grins back at him- I see you did too.

Xavier: I mean I know I made a guess about what she was like but I'm surprised I got everything right. Even down to the stutter. -chuckles-

Aurora: *starts using magic to move ingrediants and stuff around as she pours them something to drink* *smiles* I like Lux! You two look like youre realling in love

Lux: *chuckles* Yes, shes a real doll. I happen to think her stutter is cute *laughs*

Rosemary: -smiles and blushes and leans against a counter and plays with her hair- W-We do?

Xavier: -rolls his eyes and laughs- Of course you do.

Aurora: Mhm! *hands her a glass* Im so happy things for you both worked out. I can sense how happy you both are. Its like you two even have the same mind, I mean you both started laughing at the same time *giggles*

Rosemary: -smiles and takes the glass- I-It's just th-that he was worried X-Xavier would be a r-republican too. -giggles-

Lux: Isnt she adorable though! *tries to peak into the kitchen* Thanks for knocking some sense in me *nods, smiling* Youre a true friend

Aurora: *laughs into her hand and takes a sip* Really? How funny. Our boys have like the same mind

Xavier: Same goes to you. -chuckles when he tries to look into the kitchen- If it weren't for you I think I'd be breaking her heart. Thanks.

Rosemary: -giggles and drinks a bit- I'm not sure i-if that's hilarious or t-terrifying.

Lux: *gives him a noogie* You would be! And youd be sad because you let her get away!

Xavier: -chuckles and pushes him off- Thanks for kicking my ass into telling her, though. Sex is /so/ much better without the pretense of no feelings.

Aurora: A mix of both *continues waving her hands to do magic* I mean, they both hate republicans and enjoy coitus *giggles*

Rosemary: -blushes super red and drinks more- -how she still finds sex embarrassing is a mystery to us all-

Lux: *nods all proud* Anything for a fellow brother having lady troubles! *laughs* I agree though. Its nice to be able to tell Rosemary I love her now and not be afraid of what she'll say

Aurora: *giggles* Has it gotten better since you two started dating?

Xavier: -hands Lux a drink from the coffee table and gets one for himself and holds up his glass- To being able to tell our women we love them.

Rosemary: -blushes super red and drinks and nods and tries to hide a really big smile-

Lux: *clinks drinks with him* Salute! *takes a sip* Howd you finally do it?

Aurora: *squeals and playfully pokes her* I can see it on your face!

Xavier: -drinks before sighing- It wasn't pretty. I mean the catalyst was her having a fling with her ex but then she told me she loved me and I couldn't say I didn't love her back because I was tired of lying.

Rosemary: -giggles and playfully slaps her hand away-Sh-Shut up!

Lux: *sucks in air* Sheesh, thats harsh. At least she cares for you more though, thats what matters. My psycho ex tried to convince Rosemary I was just using her *sighs* so then thats when i had to tell her the truth about how I really felt. i couldnt have her thinking any of that bullshit was true. It was just the right time to tell her how i felt

Aurora: *smiles and whispers* to be honest, I feel the same with Xavier and I's sex life

Xavier: We're stronger for it. -thinks for a second- Is your ex the girl that moved in and after a few days was sent a vibrator with a note saying "it's not as good as the original, but that one's mine"? -is in the news and knows everything that goes on shhhh dont question it-

Rosemary: -blushes- L-Lux is just r-really... -bites lip- g-good at what he does.

Lux: *laughs* Yeah.. that was Rosemary's doing *chuckles as he takes a sip of his drink* Howd you know?

Xavier: -chuckles and takes a drink- Lucky guess.

Aurora: *giggles* .... say, Rosemary, have you ever thought of having kids?

Rosemary: -looks up at her and thinks for a second- N-Not really. Why?

Lux: Youre good at guessing, my friend. You're two for two right now *laughs* Ugh *tries to look into the kitchen again* I cant believe they shut us out for girl talk. I want to see Rosemary try and cook! Itd be adorable

Aurora: *starts manually cooking and shrugs lightly* Oh uh I just.. i dont know, it just popped into my head the other day

Xavier: -outright laughs at him- You really love her, don't you?

Rosemary: -tries to help and is awkward and stuff- Wh-What? Are you thinking of h-having kids?

Lux: *smiles like an idiot* Can you tell?

Xavier: -rolls his eyes- You're like a lovesick puppy I swear.

Aurora: *hands her a spoon* I er.. I had a scare the other day *covers her mouth* Shhhh! Dont say anything to Xavier or Lux! But uh *bites lip* it was a false alarm but you know...

Rosemary: -wide eyes- -hushed yell- RORA! -hushes and goes up to her- Are you sure it was only a scare?

Lux: *chuckles* Shes more of the puppy than I am (haha get it cause werewolf) *sits down on couch and grabs a snack* You cant tell me you dont think shes absolutely beautiful! *chuckles* Shes so damn cute

Aurora: I er.. I-I dont know... *bites lip*

Xavier: -sits on the couch next to him and eats a bit and chuckles- She's very pretty.

Rosemary: -wide eyes- H-haven't you been u-using p-protection?!?

Lux: Shes more than pretty! *chuckles and nudges him* You cant make fun of me though, youre a little bit love sick too if Aurora turned you from a cold sex addict to a boyfriend *laughs*

Xavier: -chuckles and shoves him- Shut up.

Aurora: Yes!.. Sometimes! M-most of the time! A-and its never been a problem because usually i just use a spell but I-I dont think it works over time though

Lux: *wiggles eyebrows* Admit it, you're just a teeny bit whipped

Rosemary: R-Rora! -hugs her- H-Have you been s-sick?! A-Are you late with your b-bleeding? -wide eyes and is super worried-

Xavier: Little bit. -laughs and drinks-

Aurora: I-Im late but *shakes head* I-Itll be fine! *rubs her stomache* Ill just uh *bites lip* ill terminate it

Lux: *gives him a look* Bullshit *laughs*

Rosemary: W-Without telling Xavier?

Xavier: -chuckles- Okay, I'm whipped. -sighs and takes another drink- What can I say? I'd do anything for her.

Aurora: *shakes head* O-Oh god no! I-I couldnt tell him!

Rosemary: -tilts her head to the side and looks at her confused- Why?

Lux: *chuckles* Same with Rosemary. I'd protect her no matter what. I'd give my right arm before I let anything happen to that sweet angel

Aurora: *looks down* B-Because he has work and he probably still wants to live his life, n-not have a kid

Xavier: You know I used to never sleep? I would always stay up working myself sick until I passed out from pure exhaustion. -sighs and smiles a bit- Since I've met Aurora, I've been able to get to sleep because she's with me and she makes sure I don't work too hard and -sighs and smiles- she keeps me sane.

Rosemary: But he l-loves you. I-If that doesn't m-mean he w-would drop everything f-for you, wh-what does?

Lux: Really? *smiles* That's really sweet *nudges him with his elbow* that's cute that you care about her that much that shes like sort of your relaxer. *smiles* Rosemary does the same thing. She calms me down, and well I do my thing *smirks and takes a sip of his drink cause eyyyy sex*

Aurora: I-I couldnt ask him to do that though! T-thats not fair! *sighs* Besides, I'm only twenty...

Xavier: -chuckles and drinks- You really are shameless.

Lux: *smirks and shrugs* Shes not complaining

Rosemary: I-If you are p-pregnant... You sh-should tell him. Wh-Whether or not you keep it sh-should be a decision y-you make t-together.

Xavier: -covers his face and groans- Please stop.

Aurora: *bites lip* I-I dont want him to get mad though! *puts face in hands and sighs* Its all my fault. I wasnt being careful enough..

Lux: Hey, Im just very proud of the exquisite sex life I have been blessed with! *raises his glass*

Rosemary: -hugs her and kisses her forehead- He won't get mad.

Xavier: -laughs and raises his glass- To sex! -drinks-

Aurora: *frowns and hugs her back* He'll think im an idiot...

Lux: To the coitus! *clinks glasses* I was thinking of asking Rosemary to move in with me. I mean, she practically lives in my home now anyway *laughs*

Rosemary: -sighs- No he won't.

Xavier: I've been thinking about the same thing for Aurora. I mean, her clothes take up most of my closet space, and my apartment is closer to her first class most days than her dorm is. Besides, I like having her around.

Aurora: I-Im just afraid to lose him.. I love him so much and just... *sighs* everyone leaves. I just want him to stay...

Rosemary: -lightly bonks her on the head- Y-You can be s-so silly. -shakes her head- H-He won't leave you. Ever.

Lux: *chuckles* Rosemary always leaves something at my house when shes in a rush to get out. Its really cute. I made a drawer for her stuff so she might as well move in. I love waking up to her next to me in the morning and having the smell of her in my bed. Itd be nice to have that everyday.

Aurora: *frowns* thats what I thought about my dad and Kade..

Xavier: When are you gunna ask her to move in?

Rosemary: N-Not everyone i-is like th-them. -small smile- I s-see the way he l-looks at you.

Lux: *smiles down at his empty glass* Maybe when the ball drops? I think thatd be a nice start to the new year. Whaddaya think?

Aurora: *holds hand to her chest* I just dont know who will stay and who wont anymore..

Xavier: You are so corny.

Rosemary: He will. Trust that.

Lux: And you have a better idea to ask Aurora?

Aurora: *sighs* S-should I tell him soon?

Rosemary: Wh-When the ball drops.

Aurora: *gulps* Y-you sure?

Xavier: Not sure.

Rosemary: Y-Yes.

Xavier: -looks at the time- GIRLS! GET IN HERE! -turns on tv- Five minutes to the new year!

Aurora: oh god *gulps and walks in squeezing Rosemary's arm*

Rosemary: -squeezes her hand and smiles before walking over to Lux and pecking him on the cheek-

Lux: *countdown starts* Its almost time! *hugs Rosemary super tight and attacks her cheek with kisses*

Rosemary: -giggles and kisses him back-

Aurora: I uh *lightly tugs and Xavier's sleeve and whispers* X-Xavier I have to tell you something

Xavier: -holds Aurora close and smiles at her and kisses her nose- What is it, darling?

Lux: 5.. 4... *whispers in Rosemary's ear* You want to do me the honor of being my new years kiss? *kisses her neck a little and chuckles*

Aurora: I u-uh *bites lip and looks up really nervously at him*

Xavier: -looks at her concerned- Are you alright darling?

Rosemary: 3...2... -smiles and kisses him when the ball drops-

Lux: *kisses her backs and spins her* *chuckles and puts his forehead against hers* Rosemary, my love, would you like to move in with me? I'd enjoy waking up to your beautiful smile every morning each day of this year *kisses her nose*

Aurora: *ball drops* I-I'm pregnant.

Rosemary: -gasps and giggles and jumps into his arms- Y-Yes!! Of course!!

Xavier: -wide eyes for a second before he smiles and picks her up and swings her around and kisses her really sweetly-

Lux: *chuckles and kisses her* I can just expand my house with magic, itll be wonderful! We can decorate it however you like *kisses her*

Aurora: *bites lip* Y-youre not mad..? Y-youre not breaking up with me?......

Rosemary: -giggles and smiles and kisses him- I-I love you.

Lux: I love you more, angel *kisses her jaw and chuckles* More than you could possibly imagine

Xavier: -looks at her like she's insane- Why the hell would I be mad? -smiles like an idiot and kisses her- You want to keep it, right?

Rosemary: -wraps her arms around his neck and kisses him for a bit before she snaps back to reality- R-Rora! -grabs Lux's hand and runs over to her and Xavier- D-Did you tell him?

Aurora: *frowns* Because... my dad didnt want kids when my mom told him she was pregant. And also you have work and I dont want to hold you back from anything..... I uh.. c-can we talk about this alone?

Aurora: *looks over at Rosemary* Y-yeah *nods*

Lux: Tell em' what? *tilts head*

Xavier: -looks at Rora- Should I tell him?

Aurora: *smiles a little and nods* G-go ahead

Xavier: -looks at Lux and grins like an idiot- She's pregnant. Now, if you'll excuse us for a bit we need to talk. -smiles and takes Aurora's hand and leads her to the bedroom so they can talk about things and closes door-

Rosemary: -nods and shoos them away and smiles-

[dungeonmasterpoisonbite]

Wednesday Friendsday Mission Logs: Goblins in Suburbia

Keeper Representative #298:

Interparty Communication Hub Rules

1-no explicit nsfw content such as overtly explicit text or imagery

2-more rules will be added as the need arises

Sweet Ghoulman 💀: jevens.

🚐Jevans🎷: thats jevans mate

whats up?

Sweet Ghoulman 💀: i have a mix CD. Can i bring it?

🚐Jevans🎷: depends

Sweet Ghoulman 💀: on what?

🚐Jevans🎷: whats on it?

Sweet Ghoulman 💀: you know. Good music.

-posts link to bass boosted "Down Under" by Men At Work (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wC-dS7JmCbY)

🚐Jevans🎷: is there anything else but that song on it?

Sweet Ghoulman 💀: absolutely not

🚐Jevans🎷: good

oh oh

El 🐍: do you mean you have twelve to fourteen of the same song on one CD?

🚐Jevans🎷: im pickin you up first sweets

El 🐍: also, um, Mr. Evans? Is it okay to bring food in your car?

Sweet Ghoulman 💀: B]

🚐Jevans🎷: so long as theres enough for your driver

El 🐍: okay, well. I'm not sure but my sister ordered Chinese food. She may finish it before you get here, though. Would you like the fortune cookie?

👊Dee Foster thats the best part though el!!!!!

El 🐍: they gave us two... I was thinking he could have mine.

Jev: sure ill polish yer leftovers

👊Dee Foster BUT

fine he can have it -frowny imp emoji-

El 🐍: did....did you want them both?

🚐Jevans🎷: hey dee can have it

i read the docs and dont want her mad at me

👊Dee Foster NO you have it L.O.L.

i was only teasing!!!!

-XD emoji-

🚐Jevans🎷: alright hahahahsdfsdaf

oops

El 🐍: Mr. Evans, would you like any of this ma po tofu?

🚐Jevans🎷: only if yer not eatin eat

its ahrd to eat when im driving with passengers

Sweet Ghoulman 💀: are you texting whilst driving??

El 🐍: are you implying our driver would break the law???

🚐Jevans🎷: hahahaha

👊Dee Foster O.M.G. he better not be!!!!

🚐Jevans🎷: HAHAH

El 🐍: :\

🚐Jevans🎷: absolutely not

speech-to-text mates

Nelherin: that can still be distracting!!

El 🐍: Wow your dictation software must be very advanced to know to capitalize your laughter with emphasis!

Sweet Ghoulman 💀: magic SIRI

El 🐍: oh my gosh, if Mr. Evans has a magic phone, i want one.

🔥 Nelherin ⚡ : is it okay with everyone if i photo document our adventures?

🚐Jevans🎷: this is expensive hardware, you gotta work a long time to get it

but all in good time El

and so long as you dont flash in the vehicle sure

El 🐍: I mean, i've got an iPhone, but it isn't magic.

Nelherin, I'm fine with that, as long as you don't make them available publicly online. Last semester one of my students posted a picture of me on Facebook and tagged it "That Weird Nerd" and I thought that was really unkind.

👊Dee Foster WHAT!!!! YOU DIDNT TELL ME THAT!!!! WHO WAS IT!!!! WAIT IM IN THE ROOM WITH YOU

El 🐍: It was super unflattering too. :(

👊Dee Foster -three red angry emojis-

🔥 Nelherin ⚡ : i won't release them publicly! I think that might get me in trouble with the keepers, hah...

El 🐍: okay, that's fine! If you tag me, please tag me as EL SHRIVER.

Sweet Ghoulman 💀: i have stickers

🔥 Nelherin ⚡ : okay!

What kind of stickers?

Sweet Ghoulman 💀: stickers for a scrapbook

🔥 Nelherin ⚡ : oh i love scrapbooking!

Maybe i could photodocumennt with a scrapbook!

El 🐍: I have stickers for coding my planner! There are different ones for meetings, classes, study sessions, and even a little cup of coffee! I'm coding these missions as "gym" so that Dee thinks I'm exercising.

Sweet Ghoulman 💀: well now she knows

El 🐍: Oh shoot.

🚐Jevans🎷: no one tell el they can delete messages

El 🐍: Oh this isn't a static record of our communications?

🔥 Nelherin ⚡ : you just told them by saying that??

jevans; well yeah im the cool driver

and no el its not static

El 🐍: Well. I still think we should be keeping some record of what we do and if I just go back and edit what I say, that's like changing history.

🚐Jevans🎷: you could hop over to Keeper Chat and bug 298

👊Dee Foster HEY!!!! I JUST SAW THAT!!!

🚐Jevans🎷: they could prolly change it for you

👊Dee Foster next time i go to the gym youre going with me el!!!!

El 🐍: oh... oh boy.

🔥 Nelherin ⚡ : do you think the keepers would be okay with it if i photo document our adventures?

🚐Jevans🎷: dunno

i mean

i snap all the time

no ones said nothin yet

🔥 Nelherin ⚡ : in my experience, if anything... strange shows up in pictures, most people usually assume its just photo editing and sfx makeup, so i don't think there should be a problem? But i don't wanna get in trouble!!

🚐Jevans🎷: i dont think theyd mind

🔥 Nelherin ⚡ : okay!! i dont think anyone outside of this group will be seeing most of the pictures, but i wanna be safe just in case!!

Sweet Ghoulman 💀: jevens do you have snapchat

🚐Jevans🎷: yee

note

that statement is a BITCH to get speech-to-text to get properly

🔥 Nelherin ⚡ : did you have to spell it out??

🚐Jevans🎷: nah i gotta say it like just right

like if i go too much towards yeah itll get that instead

but yeah doesnt have the right spirit yaknow?

Sweet Ghoulman 💀: incredible

avery: so like is this the chat or whatever?

🔥 Nelherin ⚡ : yep!!

Sweet Ghoulman 💀: hi miss avery

its me, the green one

avery: am i supposed to talk to you guys

🔥 Nelherin ⚡ : if you want to!!

avery: um

hey

who are you

El 🐍: Nice to meet you, Avery! The dossier says you're a student?

Avery: who are any of you

yea i guess

i'm in high shook

school whatever

Sweet Ghoulman 💀: im sweet. Sweet ghoulman. We've met. With the wizard?

👊Dee Foster O.M.G. hello!!!!

avery: oh you're the creepy guy

cool i guess

hi?

Sweet Ghoulman 💀: oh, thank you.

El 🐍: ... that isn't very nice. :\

🔥 Nelherin ⚡ : why is sweets creepy

Sweet Ghoulman 💀: nelherin you havent met me yet

avery: wait if you're in this chat im gonna have to like. Interact with you

yikes

i guess i'm not very nice

🔥 Nelherin ⚡ : uhm, you're free to call me henri instead if you wish

Sweet Ghoulman 💀: miss avery we're on this mission together

avery: just avery's fine dude

Sweet Ghoulman 💀: avery we're on this mission together, you have my condolences

but i made a mix cd so it should be fine

El 🐍: I feel like this is an inappropriate use of the word "mix."

🚐Jevans🎷: shhhhhh

itll be a surprise el

unless avery reads from the start

🔥 Nelherin ⚡ : i agree with el...

Sweet Ghoulman 💀: only jevans understands me

🚐Jevans🎷: but i dont think avery has that much interest in seeing what weve talked about

El 🐍: thank you! Henri? May I call you Henri?

🚐Jevans🎷: sweets want my snapchat?

Sweet Ghoulman 💀: jevens can i have your #

yes absolutely

🔥 Nelherin ⚡ : you can!

Avery: wait we're allowed to have snap chats?

🚐Jevans🎷: alright buddy ill shoot it at you privately mate

avery: dammnit i deleted mine

🚐Jevans🎷: oops

Sweet Ghoulman 💀: B]

avery: can i curse here

🚐Jevans🎷: what kind of curse????

avery: is that allowed or whatever

like can i say fuck

🚐Jevans🎷: cuz like i know yer a wizard-ankle-biter

oh ye

fucking say fucking fuck as many fucking times as you fucking want

avery: literally the fuck now i have to make a new snapchat

god fucking damnit

Sweet Ghoulman 💀: B O

👊Dee Foster -BO emoji-

🚐Jevans🎷: sweets i read that as bow and thought odd but afreed

Sweet Ghoulman 💀: B0

avery: oh not emojis

🔥 Nelherin ⚡ : what's wrong with emojis??

avery: come on y'all are older than me right

👊Dee Foster -frowny imp emoji- WHATS WRONG WITH EMOJIS????

🚐Jevans🎷: that one is slightly less bow

like a quieter bow

soft bow

avery: just childish

🚐Jevans🎷: avery yer like 12 chill

avery: but if you wanna play it that way then be my guest

El 🐍: I read it as B.O. and was hoping I wouldn't be the only odd-smelling person on the trip...

🔥 Nelherin ⚡ : but emojis are fun

👊Dee Foster -worried emoji, anguished emoji, frowning emoji-

Sweet Ghoulman 💀: emojis... are timeless

youll be in good company el

🚐Jevans🎷: except for -watch emoji-

avery: bad joke jevans

🔥 Nelherin ⚡ : i thought it was funny!!

El 🐍: L O L

👊Dee Foster L.O.L.!!!!

🚐Jevans🎷: eeeeeeeeeh henri can sit in the front

🔥 Nelherin ⚡ : yay!! :D

avery: can i bring my headphones to wherever we're going

🚐Jevans🎷: -another different watch emoji-

sure mate

Sweet Ghoulman 💀: jevens is great

🔥 Nelherin ⚡ : jevans, will you be picking anyone up soon??

🚐Jevans🎷: OH SHIT

right yeah

🔥 Nelherin ⚡ : ...

🚐Jevans🎷: ill be-CALCULATING

fuckin gps

avery: who're you getting first

🚐Jevans🎷: uuuuuuh

right sweets

okay sweets im gonna be like swinging by you gotta hop in through the window

not comin to a full stop either you gotta just jump in

El 🐍: WHAT???

avery: UM WHAT

LIKE FOR ALL OF US

👊Dee Foster CAN I DO THAT TOO!!!!!

Avery: wait a fcking second im a fucking vampire

never fucking mind my caps lock

El 🐍: DON'T ENCOURAGE DEE TO DO THAT

👊Dee Foster -flexing arm emoji followed by mischievious imp emoji-

🚐Jevans🎷: nah only sweets

if i run sweets over hell be okay

Sweet Ghoulman 💀: thanks

🔥 Nelherin ⚡ : uhm....

Sweet Ghoulman 💀: im flexible. Roll down the passenger window

👊Dee Foster IM NOT GETTING IN THE CAR UNLESS ITS THAT WAY

🚐Jevans🎷: didnt you guys get the psych profiles and background check documentaion?

Avery: the what

🔥 Nelherin ⚡ : no??

dee, you might get hurt

El 🐍: I read them all very thoroughly

avery: will there be a test on that

El 🐍: Don't worry! I have an annotated copy!

Avery: or um anything actually

oh. gee. How exciting. Thanks

El 🐍: Will there be a test?? : D

👊Dee Foster O.M.G. I WANT TO THOUGH

🔥 Nelherin ⚡ : i'm a little bit scared...

🚐Jevans🎷: okay sweets

like five minutes

Sweet Ghoulman 💀: jevens just snapchatted me a picture of a rolled down suv window

🔥 Nelherin ⚡ : does your car accomidate tall people??

El 🐍: not a concern for us! : D

🔥 Nelherin ⚡ : it is for me

El 🐍: Yes, I know.

Avery: how tall

like 6'0"?

🔥 Nelherin ⚡ : exactly

avery: whatever i'm like 5'6"

🔥 Nelherin ⚡ : ... am i the tallest one??

🚐Jevans🎷: okay one down

okay

henri youre next

Sweet Ghoulman 💀: i landed a little bit on the stick. Its fine i dont bruise

🚐Jevans🎷: ill stop properly

SNERK

🔥 Nelherin ⚡ : okay!!

El 🐍: Are the doors locked?

🚐Jevans🎷: not when I stop

🔥 Nelherin ⚡ : this music is... strange

El 🐍: Oh, man, someone down the street has a really intense subwoofer situation.

Sweet Ghoulman 💀: thanks

👊Dee Foster I MEANT IT WHEN I SAID I WANTED TO JUMP IN!!!!!!

avery: what music

are y'all near each other

🚐Jevans🎷: dont worry avery

youre the furthest out

might be a bit before we can get you

Sweet Ghoulman 💀: youll hear it soon miss avery

avery

🚐Jevans🎷: but dee and el, ill be there in a mo

avery: of course i'm the last one. Of fucking course

Sweet Ghoulman 💀: move into town avery

avery: couldn't have gotten me first huh?

El 🐍: Oh okay. Never mind about that subwoofer thing.

Sweet Ghoulman 💀: B]

avery: am i the only one left

Sweet Ghoulman 💀: MADE IT!!!!

Sweet Ghoulman 💀: you'll hear us coming

🔥 Nelherin ⚡ : dee landed on the floor!!

avery: are y'all like in the city city? It's gonna be fucking while before me then

Sweet Ghoulman 💀: we are going very fast though

almost inadvisably fast

🚐Jevans🎷: yeah were looking at like thirty mins or so?

👊Dee Foster avery do you want something from 7/11!!!!

avery: dr pepper

and a honey bun

👊Dee Foster good choices!

🚐Jevans🎷: nvm were gettin you first avery give us five mins

LATER AT THE 7/11

🚐Jevans🎷: i want a six pack of something!

Hey

heeeeeeeeeeey

someone get me something

Sweet Ghoulman 💀: jevens what can i get you

jman

juice

🚐Jevans🎷: nah not juice

like

oh

six redbulls

or something like that

i got twenty bucks