#you can reblog it if you relate or think it's interesting i guess idc do whatever

[maladaptive-daydreaming-aphant]

when did i become so hollow

the daydreams took root in my soul

safety guaranteed

indulgence abundant

reality forsaken

i work in customer service

our best barista

all smiles

no heart

i study at an online university

an exemplary overachiever

asynchronous

alone

i used to be unmistakeably human

vibrantly playful

imperfectly troublesome

daringly liberated

now there is only a glittering shell

so pretty

so faceted

so polished

so empty

i try to make conversation

but the only sounds i can make

are nervous laughter

and irrelevant anecdotes

and awkward acknowledgements

and then i regret every word

because i've filled the empty air

with even more nothingness

again and again and again

grief without tragedy

fear without danger

words without meaning

unable to confront discomfort

struggling to maintain tangibility

failing to express myself

because my mind no longer thinks about feelings

and my heart doesn't think at all

and my soul has withered to dust

overwhelmed by light and noise

agitated and restless

i shut everything out

and try to find myself in the silence

but i've already spent too long

wasting away

alone in my room

where dreams go to die

and vacant distractions reign supreme

[rose022]

hi~ im rose! (among other names lol, ask for them or find them) welcome to my intro!

- dont feel bad about blocking or unfollowing me, just wanna say this. i may make posts abt being confused when i see people leave but curate ur own experience idc be happy

- you can call me whatever you want idc, just lemme know. like genuinely any nickname. i do have two others tbh but ehh

- yeah yeah im an adult so dont block me if i like ur post and u say mdni ight? also for any minors if that makes u uncomfortable u can leave. i dont tend to post anything nsfw here, just sometimes suggestive stuff and both nsfw and suggestive are tagged just like that

- pronouns are whatever is funniest in the moment. or just use your own. neos are ok

- asks and dms always open for anything. i won't really reach out first but i promise you can always talk to me about anything. if you don't have anyone else or just want to talk about a particular thing or want to vent, etc. like genuinely pretty please talk to me about your interests i will gladly listen!!! <3

- also you can always tag me in anything!! i love tag games (i may take a bit) and if theres anything you think id like or reminds you of me id love to see it!!

- don't really have a dni but like i will block you if you're a bigot. im a fag and autistic if you don't like that go away idc. also if you are pro cop or military stuff fuck off

- if we're mutuals please tag stuff with cw rose for anything with touya or akito being shipped with anyone else or TBHK nene and tsukasa as a ship, self harm images, stuff about spiders (or any bugs kinda) mostly pictures of them or them on someone (bees moths and butterflies exempt), needles if theyre detailed not cartoony, real life gore of animals or humans (not sfx or art just real stuff), sa, stiff about veins, and please use tone tags but mostly just for joking or sarcasm as i tend to assume everything is serious.

- MUTUALS PLEASE TELL ME STUFF TO TAG FOR YOU!!! i do my best to read carrds and intros and stuff but i might forget please remind me please. gore and sexual stuff will get tagged as gore and nsfw but it's mostly explicit stuff. things are tagged as what it is, not with cw or tw.

- !!current things i tag are agere, homestuck, eye strain, saiouma, bsd, religion, body dysmorphia, religion, marlo dont look (for nsfw stuff, tbh im not sure what counts but anything with mentions of sexual stuff that isn't just like a joke), elie shoo (csm saiouma gore), suggestive (anything relating to anything nsfw like jokes or anything else), adrien no look (alcohol, crickets, girl interrupted, hospital innuendos), clowns

- tags

#rose rambles - my posts

#rose tagged ramblings - i made a separate one for when i talk a lot in tags

#rose art - quite simply rose's art

#rose ocs - the sillies from my brain

#ask rose! - asks

#rose pics - look i don't get creative with naming these i think you can tell

#rose cosplay - ^^^ yeah

#helpful - things that could be helpful to anyone

#save - similar to above but more so personal things

#important - maybe not technically helpful but i think people should see

#favs - self explanatory, i believe

#sillies - similar to above but not really

#luv - mutual appreciation mostly

#heart! - things made by mutuals!

#liebe - things made for me!

#mecore - woah thats so me frfr

#rose writing - idk man take a guess

(i wanna like fix all my posts to have tags but i reblog so much and itll take me a million years to get back to the start of my account atp. maybe one day.)

- commission info

art:

writing: $2 per 100 words (?)

i also take requests for these!! or other stuff but like it will almost definitely take me a bajillion years to finish so if you wanna make sure i do something, gimme money. but u dont gotta its ok ily anyways

i have a k-fi rose226 and dm for p-ypal

- sideblogs

@nightcord-luka-official

@luka-spotted most active

@daily-akiyama-mizuki hiatus!

@daily-asahina-mafuyu hiatus!

@kokomi-sangonomiya-official

@mafuyu-asahina-official

@wansho-luka-official

@junior-high-enanan-official

@fischl-official

@rosemusictime lol no followers

@oz-the-bird-official (to translate my Fischl)

@ako-udagawa-official this and above in progress

@daily-purple-character send reqs

@rose-poll-account

@aoi-shirosaki-official pjsk oc rp blog

@hikari-itsuki-official ^

@yuki-jigoku-official ^

@kei-makura-official ^

@roseswonderland things i make

@yuki-spotted

@niigo-va-updates

(i may remove u as a follower depending on if i trust you enough for these next few but if we're mutuals ur pretty much safe)

@moonlit-thoughts22 vent

@selfless-lvr selfship/kin

@softrosebud agere

@shhh-its-rose moots only one mentioned at the top of this

and ask for the nsfw one... cus im too scared to just add it

(guys i think I have too many sideblogs help)

im not active on many other social media but if we're mutuals you can ask for like anything and ill probably have an account. somehow im most active here tho (and in one discord server but u guys cant join)

[therewillbenoromance]

ETHAN'S ECCENTRIC ELECTRONIC EMPORIUM: AN INTRODUCTION

hello!! you can call me ethan, mind and apollo. but honestly idc much. call me a slur [i've been called worse /ref]

i use he/it, and i am a trans man + aroacespec

mind fictionkin

i am a minor!

feel free to use any of my art as a pfp, just make sure to credit me [and don't steal or repost it!! that's a loser move!!] my time zone is EST/EDT, so be aware that if you expect a quick response for anything sent at like 4am, i can assure you that is not what you will get

here's my strawpage!!

anyways. onto the other things people put in these. possible eyestrain warning at the bottom for userboxes, i guess

INTERESTS

in order of what comes to mind [ha], my main interests that have me in a chokehold are chonny jash [duh], will wood, ut/dr, homestuck, rain world, the stanley parable, the glass scientists, and mlp

some other things i enjoy are lemon demon, cult of the lamb, miraculous [don't @ me i know it's shit /j], sonic the hedgehog, tmnt, jekyll and hyde, sanders sides, cattails, dsaf, dialtown, regretevator, and probably a lot more. essentially, if i reblog something related to it, you can assume i have at least some interest in it

MISC INFO

i'm diagnosed with adhd and am self-diagnosed with autism and apd [audio processing disorder], though there could be more neurodivergencies hidden somewhere in there

my favorite characters ever are mind [cccc] [obviously], dirk strider [homestuck], berdly [deltarune], gregoriah [regretevator], and donnie [rottmnt]

i will call anything and everything a reference to something [reference? like vampire reference in a minor? will wood???!!!]

my most used emoji's are 🗣, 💥, and 👍. i think this is important to mention

i tend to have a hard time remembering pronouns if you use multiple sets and/or neos, so if i use the wrong ones or use one set too often then don't hesitate to tell me!

i am a leo [august 19] and my mbti is intp-t. do with this what you will

i can take a bit to respond to messages or really anything direct and/or private, so if i end up taking a while to respond to anything, i don't hate you! i tend to forget to respond, be busy, or just end up too nervous to say something regardless of how good of friends we are

speaking of communication, i tend to elaborate on what i mean often, and use tone tags even when probably unnecessary and sometimes repetitively. /srs

please keep any nsfw or explicit topics out of conversation, because as stated in the first part, i am a minor and. it's just gross idk what to tell you

i swear a lot. i've been trying to not do it as often recently but. yeah

TAGS

#ethan's yapping again - General Talking™ tag

#ethan's romanceless art - art tag

#ethan's asks!! - ask tag #ethan's saved sillies :3 - save tag

#ethan's on the dumb pony game again :3 - abandoned ponytown tag that i haven't gotten rid of yet

#friendship truly is magic <3 - interactions with @irusanw4

#zilly friend :3 - interactions with @c0smicallyk1ssed

#rizzful friend - interactions with @adhdrizzy

now to the userboxes with no organization whatsoever [again, possible eyestrain warning]

[tokyoflavor]

Current Watchlist

Dramas I'm currently watching (not all were released this year, but I like to keep things interesting ig)

I'll try and keep this as spoiler free as possible, but I do tend to reblog gifsets of scenes that may have spoilers~

My Journey to You (8/24)

I'm digging this so much! It's dark, it's atmospheric, it's moody, it's beautifully filmed! The cast are all so pretty! All the characters are really intriguing. I'm loving the most: sister Gong Zi Shang and Jin Fan's dynamics, and the second lead couple are so captivating!! [current rating: 8.5/10] Young Blood (11/42) I'm still pushing myself through this one for my man Zhang Xincheng, but something about it just doesn't give me much draw to continue watching. Ofc I will because I wanna know what's so loved about it, but I think the arc I'm on kind of loses my interest somewhat...[7/10] Killer and Healer (14/37) I'm liking this one a lot, despite not caring for Republican era dramas very much. The plot is probably nothing new, but I do like the chemistry of the main leads. If only the eng subs were a little better 😩 [8/10] I Am Nobody (1/27) okay I just started this one so I don't have much opinion on how I feel but so far I'm loving the comedy that keeps you watching for more. idk much about the ML, but he's amusing to watch, and Neo Hou looks so good 👌 [8/10]

The Long Ballad (14/49) Restarted this one as I was enjoying it before and was kind of in the mood for some Wu Lei. I actually cried watching ep 14, it was so emotional! I'm totally invested for the time being [8/10] Secret of Three Kingdoms (4/54) I picked this up for Tan Jianci ofc, but I don't really like palace historical dramas asjfsjdg SOOOO we'll see if I actually get far enough to see him in it much :| lmao [no rating yet] *suffering for my faves* Ultimate Note (2/10) I guess you could hardly say I started this seeing as it's only been 2 eps, I also kind of just.. forgot about it for a bit lol. I'm not sure if it's for me as I don't care for tomb raiding stuff but I wanted to see more of Joseph Zeng and none of his other roles rly look interesting asdsajf :/ I'll see about whether I go back to it after Young Blood.. [6/10] The Killing Vote (2/12) Picked this up because it was getting a good reaction, even though idc for the ML. It's intriguing so far, and I'll admit I'm interested in the plot for now. Will stick with it and see. [no rating yet] Beach Boys (4/12) Watching this for a Drama Club. Not really sure I'm in the mood for it since I've apparently fallen into a cdrama hole so it's not making me overly motivated to watch very much lmao.. I can tell it's just a fun entertaining series / bromance but I kind of want it to reel me in more lol [6/10]

Planning to watch Stuff I'll likely pick up in the near future: Moving (heard many a good thing) The Bond (when i'm in the mood for something srs) Knockin' on Locked Door (gotta support my boy) Stay With Me Beach Boys (for a Drama Club.. i'm trying to gear myself up into the mood for it) Waiting for: Lost You Forever Part 2 (one day..) Anything remotely Tan Jianci related The Worst of Evil Sparkling Watermelon

[sparrowmoss]

List 5 things that make you happy, then put this in the askbox for the last 10 people who liked or reblogged something from you! Get to know your mutuals and followers (i got this, your turn now)

gettig an ask on tumblr in 2024 is crazyyyy but hiiii okay ill do it okay yes uhhh

almost everyrhing space related has always been a great source of intrigue for me. thats why i love movies and tv that deal with space stuff aas well as real life astronomy stuff. im not that smart so really technical stuff about how it works goes over my head but ill never get tired of the awe i feel when i look at a super hd photo of the landscape of mars or clouds in a nebula or the way galaxies can spin stars into different shapes or just... knowing this shit has all been spinning for more years than we can even actually comprehend and is doing things beyond our imagination. crazy. absolutely crazy bro

colors in art. it can be anything. weird bright abstract art, glaze mixing on ceramics, multicolored yarn, idc. i love it all. i spend so much time thinking about colors

my cats!!!!!! sometimes overwhelmed by how much attention they need now being switched to indoors only but apollo is so cute and polite and sweet and stupid as a rock i love him. zuko is so smart and mischievous and its a pain but its so interesting to see what is interesting to him. he watched my brother take apart a VCR for almost 2 hours last week and was absolutely fascinated by it. wild stuff. i never get tired of these little guys

growing flowers. i mostly focus on pansies these past few years and maybe this is a strange thing to list but i guess it ties with the colors thing, i love having my little rainbow garden and collecting the seeds and planting them the next year and seeing what new color patterns come up from whatever crossed from the past year

panera bread restaurant squash soup

[mcrmadness]

I really shouldn’t do this. Just thinking about people who are no longer a part of my life either because they decided to stop talking to me or because I decided it was better to part ways. And it’s making me sad and I hate it. Mainly because I’m again starting to feel invisible and lonely and apparently I then tend to torture myself even more by making me go and do things that I then associate with these people.

But I also hate it how I feel like I don’t have a normal concept of human relation(ship)s at all. Sometimes I wonder if I have played just too much The Sims games in my life (I started when I was 9 so I have played these games for 20 years) because I feel like the way I see the relationships is exactly how it is in the sims games. Don’t interact in a while and soon you get a message “you are no longer friends with X”. That’s literally how I feel friendships in my head. I feel like whenever there’s a long pause, that will mean that the friendship will be automatically reset back to 0 by time. Whenever there’s something we both like and have in common, it’s immediate green plus marks on the friendship and a positive moodlet. When we disagree or don’t have something in common, it will give red minus marks. And maintaining relationships feels as difficult as it is in the sims games too - tell them the same thing twice and it will be minus points. Tell them a thing they don’t like and it’s minus points, if you’re too close to 50%, maybe it drops from friends to acquintances. If you tell a succesful joke, you’re friends again. And right now I’m feeling like I’m “losing” all my friends because there’s been too huge pause with everyone and I feel sad about anything I associate with them because I feel like a friendship is over even when no one has said anything like that. It’s all in my head and it’s like a delusion because the second someone talks to me again, I forget ever even having such feels. But when the next pause comes, I again start to prepare myself for the moment where I’m left alone and never talked to again. Maybe I just have had this kind of situations so often in my life that I’m already preparing myself for that moment so that it won’t be that big of a shock when it happens.

I know it’s not healthy and it’s not RIGHT towards my friends to constantly be like this but can I change? Is there anything I could do to change this? I don’t always even recognize when I’m doing this, only lately I have woken up to this and it makes me feel bad because, like that one post I made several weeks ago, I’m really concerned that am I one of those unstable friends that will drive everyone around them into exhaustion eventually. Are people getting out of my life only to protect themselves? I feel like I’m always just too much to everyone and that I’m left alone in the end because I’m the only one who cannot escape me. I have to live with my brains and listen to all the shit it comes up. I’d love to cancel myself too if I could, but I can’t.

When my depersonalization/derealization was at its worst, I acually felt like I was invisible. Some days I was legit wondering if I was even alive. I was wondering if I was a ghost or idk, in a coma but just had no clue. I felt like people did not see me anywhere, I still can remember being to a grocery store and almost being run over by someone with a shopping cart and so many people almost walked against me and I just remember that moment so well as I got really frustrated and I was almost certain that I must be invisible, how else would people almost run over me with a shopping cart and they did not even look at me, as if I was not even there! Some days I thought maybe my minor car crash in 2010 put me into coma (yeah, Life On Mars uk much???) because I haven’t felt like the time would have passed AT ALL since that. I still feel like I’d be 19 and I’m supposed to be 29. Like, HOW???

And now I’m starting to have that feel of being invisible again. I have a nice amount of followers on Tumblr and this is something that I don’t really want to address at all because I appreciate every single one there and I could not care less about the number itself. But I’m starting to feel like... how could I gain more followers who would be interested in my stuff too? Like, I feel like talking to walls here. I bet no one is reading this post either. I so often feel like venting and writing down my thoughts but then I feel like there’s no point in that because I could as well write in a diary, which I hate, because as many people are going to read these as there’s people who can read my diary. Aka none. Not even me. I don’t like reading my diary and usually I also do not come back to these posts I put in Tumblr. Sometimes I browse my posts and am like “wtf have I been writing???” but I guess that’s the main point too, just to get it out of my system and I don’t need them back, mainly because they never really leave, they just evolve into new stuff I will vent here sooner or later too.

I am an attention whore who is afraid of being the center of attention. Sure if I tagged my posts more I might get more people to find me but I’m also afraid of being found or that my personal posts get reblogged. I don’t really want these to be on anyone’s dash except when it’s my original post. My social anxiety is afraid of notes and my HSP is afraid of the reactions I might get because of notes. But whenever I do something that I wish would get notes, I get none. And every time that happens, my perfectionism feels violated and I feel like a failure and that I suck at everything ever. Sometimes I am even shocked by the fact I post something like this and then suddenly remember that I have no idea how many people out these even is seeing these on their dash. What do they think? Do they see these and be like “oh god again that pathetic creature is whining some shit *eyeroll*” or do they just skip because idc.

I have so many times in my life felt like I am less than everyone else. It’s because when I was 13, my best friend turned out to be a narcissist (if that is possible for a 13-years-old) and we stopped being friends and eventually I made everyone else mad at me too and was alone, lonely and hated by everyone for a couple of years and your teens is the worst time for that to happen. I still don’t know if I was the villain or those girls. So I start feeling like a failure and worse than everyone very easily. AT some point I tried to get attention with my art but I didn’t succeed and I always felt like a failure then. “I should be better at arts, maybe I’d then be seen and approved.” During my worst time I actually thought I was relating to Garfield’ Jon so much and I legit thought I exist in this world only so that everyone else can feel a little bit better about themselves because there’s always at least one person who is worse than them. I literally felt like the meaning of my life was to make others feel better just because of how much of a loser I am. That’s why I feel sad when I see people getting asks all the time. I’m not really jealous or angry, I’m just sad because it just makes me remember how useless I am and how boring my life is and how bring absolutely nothing to this world and how... just invisible I am. I bet all ask posts have been on people’s dashes but no one just find me interesting enough to send questions. But I can’t blame them, because would I send myself asks if I was someone else and saw me on their dash? No. (Well, soon I will if no one else does, let’s see how out of my mind I will look for other people then lol.) I’d probably just unfollow my user because of what a pain in the ass I really am after all.

So whatever, a long post and useless blabber and just letting out some steam. I’ll go to watch some TV now and try to get over this. I’m also feeling like I hate Tumblr, I don’t want to come here to be disappointed because no one wants to know anything about me but I also can’t keep myself away from here because I want to know if I’ve got any asks because that would be some interesting stuff to do for my brains. So it’s like I have my hopes high only to be crushed in a minute and I keep doing this cycle every 5 minutes because I can’t decide if I should be a pessimist or an optimist.

Gosh, am I being selfish or what? I hate being selfish and I hate selfish people. But why am I still constantly talking about myself? Hypocrite much??? I wish I could unfollow the “blog” in my brains.

[janiedean]

Well congratulations. Your fandom has successfully erased the woman of color main character and love interest and replaced her with a white dude. So much for Yen mattering. You won.

… listen, I don’t know what lann/incest shipper are you out of the usual bunch of extremely sad people who are trying to make sure I end up arguing with either yen fans or yen/geralt shippers when I have absolutely no bone to pick with any of them, I make sure I don’t tag anything but the ship in my witcher posts, I have written 10k of threesome with all three of them on top of that and I absolutely don’t want drama for this fandom ffs but honestly, you’re ridiculous.

one: idk what this is about but if it’s that post I reblogged this morning about joey b/atey being billed like a main in articles about characters returning to the show in S2 when he’s the first billed of the not-mains you honestly need to fucking chill because wow, a fan favorite character is mentioned in an article written to inform fans of who’s coming back next season? AFTER, in order, henry anya and freya? like. fucking chill.

two: as much as you presume I don’t know that, do you realize that saying ‘my fandom’ erased successfully a female character who is second-billed in the show, definitely co-main in the books from what I’ve read so far, the canonical love interest of the MAIN CHARACTER that she’s obviously BOUND to CANONICALLY (I’ve read the last wish, did you?) and who is most likely fucking going nowhere in the show? like pal until netflix comes out with a statement saying ‘according to fan reception we decided to fire anya and make geralt and jaskier stick their tongues in each others’s throat in the first five minutes of 2x01 you’re welcome’, which is obviously never going to happen because that’s not the plot and we all know that, no one has fucking erased anyone from the narration or from the show, like wow what power would I have if just by being in a fandom with a lot of people in it I could wish things out of existence! then 8x05 of GOT wouldn’t have happened and I’d have been spared dnd’s boner for c/ersei lannister ruining the entire damned series, but that didn’t happen now, did it? *shrug* and guess what I’m here writing fic and waiting for grrm, not up in your fucking blogs trying to make me stir drama with a fandom I’m not even in 100% of the time and where I just want to have fun with my ONE goddamned ship I like and without getting into shipwars idc for. so like, you have eight books of canon material plus you’ll have the show canon material, and we ‘erase’ her?

newsflash, my genius anon, indulging you even if I know it’ll be useless: it’s the way of most major fandoms that the largest ship is usually m/m and if it’s people who are friends in canon that’s usually also a thing, and I’ve been in very few fandoms where the majority of shippers were m/f, which is another discourse we could get in but I absolutely have no patience for it and we all know how it is. most of the fandom content being m/m is about typical for 95% of the fandoms in existence and that does not negate canon nor does it mean that most people into m/m actually are batting for it to be canon or want the female characters to bite the dust for the m/m ship and the fact that a few idiots do in these tiring times where your shipping preferences apparently = your morality doesn’t mean that the majority agrees or expects the female character to drop dead. good fucking grief. people will ship geralt and jaskier in fandom until their fingers fall off while geralt and yen have their canon romance that no one is gonna protest because it’s canon and if you can’t handle even that basic thing then it’s 100% obvious you’re from jc fandom and never shipped a popular m/m pairing in your damned life, because most of us who do know they’re never going to be canon.

also, fyi, yen is nonwhite in the show but she’s white in both books and game so you can take that ridiculous racism nonsense out of the window because it’s not a case of ‘we’d ship it if they both were white but the moment she’s poc we don’t anymore’. also ‘not mattering’ pal some of us like yen and have absolutely nothing against her but also, consider it, a tiny bit, just like, as an option, some of us like jaskier as a character more than yen or find him more relatable than yen regardless of whether he’s white or a dude or not, which happens because we all relate to/like characters for our own goddamned reasons and if I, a woman, have more fun writing jaskier pov than I’d have writing yen’s pov and I find geralt/jaskier a dynamic I’m way more interested exploring/writing than yen/geralt because of reasons I don’t owe you (and also because geralt and jaskier is the first fucking time my ideal m/m dynamic almost to a T is to be found in a popular ship differently from the other ship I have with that dynamic that’s stuck at nineteen fics on ao3 so excuse me if I’m a bit starved for content), then it’s my fucking business because the only people who could successfully erase yen from anything witcher-related are a) andrzej sapkwoski, b) the netflix showrunners, c) the videogame devs and guess fucking what, neither me nor anyone in this fandom is, WOW, either sapkowski or the netflix team nor works for the videogame company, so excuse me if no one is erasing fucking shit.

if you really are this invested into the character - which again I doubt because I know y’all are jc people and I have plenty of proof of that so you can go tell that story to someone else - you can do an interesting thing named write your fucking own fanfic, which btw you didn’t do even in jc fandom and it shows because you wouldn’t bother other people if you were busy creating your own content, and fyi I think yen would really fucking hate the guts of your favorite leading lady considering how she treats her goddamned children but I guess that’s beyond the point.

tldr: stop trying to make me argue with people in a fandom you’re not in, stop with this nonsense and stop being this pathetic because honestly it’s been a year and a half by now and you’re here stirring drama over a show that’s not even your main fandom? please get some help already.

[apogexnarchive]

things a new rp partner should know about me !

fun new meme here ! write 3-5 things a rp partner (or those who want to be) should know about you and tag 3-5 people! it should be related to rp and not to other interests.

one. I am chaotic. I generally apologize in advance but I come at conversations at like an 8 instead of a 5. I’m just so excited to talk to people and have friends that I just can’t slow down. Been doing this too long and had too many conversations peter out into nothing that it’s just made me develop this manic way of speech I guess. An effort to keep conversations going and plotting to push on. I don’t like wasting my time, y’know? Obviously this ridiculously manic way of conversation takes a lot of energy out of me so there will literally be days I don’t interact with anyone (and I feign being offline) to regather myself. But I guess that’s the con of being a chaotic gremlin lmfao. So if I don’t respond I’m either legitimately busy or I’m not in the mood for a convo at that time. I always come back around tho.

Oh, also, I have a sailor mouth BAD. If cursing bothers you then I am NOT the writing partner for you lmfao. F-bombs will be thrown out left and right, don’t test me. 😂😂

two. Character building is one of my favorite things. Probably why I caved and made a multi. I adore my main muse, Loki, to the ends of the earth and back, and I wanted to explore everyone else in his life. I have so much shit on all of my characters that I haven’t released (partly bc I just haven’t tried to coherently put it into words and partly bc I don’t wanna bore the shit out of people with headcanons they may not care for) so just because there may be limited information on a character doesn’t mean I don’t have a trove of insider info to pull from.

three. The chances of you ever offending me are pretty minimal. I’ve got thick af skin so don’t feel like anything you do/don’t do will bother me to the extent that I won’t ever speak to you again. Honestly, I’ve been RPing for over fourteen years and I don’t have the time/energy for minuscule problems so I just... don’t let it bother me. And if it does bother me I generally will say so (nicely), but I guarantee it’s a problem I’ll get over within a day. You’d have to do some fucked up shit for me to harness the fury inside.

four. I am awful about reaching out. Yes, I am chaotic af, but I rarely make the first move bc there is inherently a portion of me that feels like people don’t actually wanna interact. I lurk in my isolated corner and will like plotting/starter calls when/if I see them but the chances of me reaching out are small. It’s bad. I’ve acknowledged it. At this point in time idk if it’ll change bc I’m garbage. If you ever wanna interact with me and don’t wanna IM me, mutuals are always welcome to send in memes. It’s partly why I reblog them so much. I don’t do starters very often but I love memes and encourage people to use them as icebreakers (and, yes, you can send in multiple for other muses idc).

five. The biggest reason why I take forever to reply is bc I’m struggling with my writing. Sometimes it can be because I don’t have the muse or I’m not sure where to take the thread to next, but nine times out of ten it’s because I go “ew what the fuck IS THIS” @ whatever I’ve concocted and instead of pushing through I just procrastinate until my mojo comes back. I feel like it’s noticeable when my writing isn’t at the top of its game vs when it is.

Also, yes, it is totally possible I’ve lost a thread too. I’m the WORST at keeping track of shit. You’d think years of this would teach me to be better organized but HAH jokes. I am never organized.

tagged by: I stole it ofc tagging: who hasn’t done this at this point?

[thegreymoon]

Hi I have been a fan of your work for a very long time and so I sneak into your tumblr from time to time.I counldnt help but notice that you post a lot of political/sjw stuff and I know it is none of my business but since I am probably absolutely opposite in my political views I can't help myself and ask: I understand that you are Asian, but you don't seem to be interested in real or imagined injustices in your country/continent and are mainly interested in USA, why is that?

Hi, anon!

First of all, I am not Asian and I’m very sorry if I ever did or said anything to mislead people into thinking that I was. It was unconsciously done. I have no intention of offending anyone or appropriating an identity that isn’t mine, so if I did something of that sort, please let me know and I’ll do my best to correct myself. I often reblog stuff about China because I think it’s an amazing country, I’m learning Mandarin (not making much progress, though), love their culture, nature, architecture and am a big fan of their historical/fantasy dramas. Also, the two fandoms I was the most active in (coincidentally) happen to be a Japanese anime and a Japanese video game, so I have a lot of love for their art and aesthetics.

I’m actually very surprised that you would ‘notice’ that I post a lot of ‘political/sjw stuff’, considering that I mostly use Tumblr to repost Merlin gifs, cast/crew news and fanworks. There is maybe one reblog on just about anything else for every fifty (perhaps even more) Merlin posts, so I really have to wonder which of the RL issues I posted about bothered you so much that you would describe them as ‘a lot’.

I may be misinterpreting the tone of your ask, so forgive me if I misread your intentions and am responding too harshly, but in my experience, ‘SJW’ is a term that is used to be dismissive when people are talking about real social issues, plus I found your wording of ‘imagined injustices’ very… interesting.

Also, I find it odd that somebody would unironically ask me why I’m ‘mainly’ interested in the USA.

First of all, the global market is oversaturated with American media, American products, American news, American movies, TV series, music, you name it. It’s everywhere. Of course I’m going to know more about it than, say, Lichtenstein. The exposure of American public figures is insane and it just happens that the stuff that appears on my dash is most often related to the USA because that is what the people I follow also follow (and for the record, on Tumblr, I mainly follow the Merlin fandom and to a somewhat lesser degree, various artists, baby animals, Chinese traditional outfits, Buzzfeed and NASA news). I absolutely do reblog pure evil, injustices, hypocrisy and intentionally inflicted misery in other countries too when I see them, but I don’t actively go looking for them on Tumblr, just like I don’t actively look for the USA posts either. The USA posts are simply there, without much active input from me, while other countries are not. An important point, of course, since we are having this weird discussion about why a random person outside of the USA is consuming so much American media, is that English is the only foreign language I am fluent in, so when it comes to foreign content, I am primarily going to read and interact with posts in English. And which country creates the most content in English? Yup, you guessed it!  

On a similar note, everything that happens in the USA affects other countries too. Nothing that goes on there takes place in a vacuum and the USA has made damn sure that it has its fingers in each and every single pie all over the world. Everything, the good and the bad, spills over and trust me, we feel the effects acutely in my unstable, politically fraught little country. The economic and cultural implications are enormous, so you can bet American issues are very personal for me, even if I don’t live there. My country’s government consists of puppets in the hands of various world leaders playing tug of war with actual human lives. My literal paycheck depends on the stability of the dollar. The survival of the entire human species hangs on how we deal with climate change right now and that ignorant, illiterate orange shitstain Americans voted into power is now standing on a global platform, spouting nonsense that is barely one step removed from Creationist bullshit and Flat-earther conspiracies. And you seriously ask me why I’m interested in the USA? 

The USA loves to dub itself as ‘the leader of the free world’ and ‘a global superpower’, and has managed to stick its nose into everybody’s business everywhere (usually with no good intentions), but somehow you question why the rest of us are now going to be interested in what is going on there, not to mention critical when the US government spouts absolute rubbish not just on a domestic, but also global scale? So, yes, I am personally invested in what is going down next in the USA and am sitting here, half the world across, cheering Americans on as they fight to have that shame they elected removed from power and, hopefully, incarcerated, along with all his corrupt cronies, advisors and family members. I’m going to be genuinely celebrating here when he finally goes down!

Secondly, I come from one of those countries that the USA and its allies have destroyed for their own gain and where they have ruined countless lives over multiple generations. I have every reason to notice, take a personal interest in and comment on the hypocrisy, the grandstanding and the false moral high ground that is assumed by the USA (and any of its bootlickers) when I see it.

For any of my USA followers here, I would just like to note that I am perfectly capable of distinguishing between ordinary people and disgusting government policies enacted by corrupt or incompetent politicians. I realise this post sounds angry, but I wish only good things for you all, people are people everywhere and the stuff I’m talking about is way above the average person’s paygrade. I also realise that the USA has screwed over so many of its own citizens; including its war veterans, PoC, minorities, the poor, the weak and the disabled. My heart goes out to you all, truly, and I love you all!

(BTW, I intentionally have not said which country I’m from because I’ve stopped publically stating my location online, simply because it makes it too easy for malicious people to identify me IRL that way. I don’t necessarily hide my RL identity if I have a valid reason to reveal my true name and location, but please forgive me for not stating it outright here, on a public platform, to satisfy the curiosity of an anon ask. My country is misogynistic, homophobic and hostile to all who are non-conforming and my job prospects are hard enough without my online pseudonyms being generally known in my RL circles. I used to be much less secretive about it, but have since learned the error of my ways and am now taking the most basic of precautions.)

With that said, yes, my country has issues! And, fyi, I have ranted and raged and cried about them before online, IRL and in private. I have posted about my country’s political problems everywhere, including here, when I was just too angry to hold it in because I’m absolute shit at being careful even when I make a conscious effort to be. Most recently, I raged about our elections which were a punch to the gut. If I was to start typing about the corruption, injustices and absolute evil going on around me, I would never stop, but I’m not going to do that because that’s not what I come to Tumblr for. This is primarily a fandom space, mostly for fandom stuff, where I come to look at other people’s things and almost never create content of my own. Just about anything political has been reblogged from someone else because it showed up on my dash and touched a nerve. Very little of that is stuff from my own country because nobody creates and reblogs posts about it in the fandom circle I mostly interact with.

I’m now trying to think back to what ‘SJW’ issues (as you put it) I reblog the most often and how any of them are ‘imaginary injustices’. Off the top of my head, the ones that usually touch a nerve are about the oppression and discrimination of women, patriarchy, sexism, various kinds of abuse, sexual assault, overworking, capitalist brainwashing, mental health issues, LGBTQ issues, freedom of speech, resurgence of Nazism, the gap between the rich and the poor, climate change and criminal religious institutions regaining power in society. I can assure you that none of these is ‘imaginary’ and the negative ways in which they affect me and the people around me are very, very real. Also, none of them is unique to the USA, which is what you seem to be the most concerned about, and even if the post is from or about the USA, these problems definitely overlap with things that I, and countless people around the world, are personally experiencing and have a lot of feelings about. The only social issues ‘unique’ to the USA that I often reblog are the ones related to the particular US brand of racism and the appalling, still-ongoing genocide committed against the indigenous people there, and how can you not empathise with that when it’s so egregious? I will reblog them every time they cross my dash to spread awareness since the US government is actively trying to stifle it and rewrite history and idc who is uncomfortable.

With all that said, I’m open to corrections and have no problem admitting to being wrong once I realise I’ve made a mistake. So, this goes for all the people following my blog: if any of the posts I shared are about ‘imaginary’ issues (just… wow at the use of this word) or contain false information, please feel free to let me know and I will take it under advisement. I’m always willing to learn.

[wildfireornot]

tagged by @pastel-rainbow-galaxy (aka the only person who tags me in cool stuff on here lmao bless you <3)

rules: tag followers that you want to know better

name: W

nicknames: -

gender: this question again? *sigh* psa: label me as cis-female if you wish but don’t assume that means anything about me or how i feel about myself bc plot twist: it fucking does not. (edit: by “label me as” ofc i meant shut up you don’t rlly get to label me ykno? -not adressed to anyone in particular dw-)

star sign: leo (i don’t relate to it tho so eh whatever)

height: 1m71 / 5′6 (the last time i checked was probably like one or two years ago but i guess im still the same height)

sexual orientation: queer/gay/polysexual are terms i use to describe it. don’t call me a lesbian, i don’t like that term, thanks

favorite color: purple, violet

favorite animal: felines/cats/wolves

average hours of sleep: these days i can sleep 9 or 10 hours (usually from approximately 2am to 12 or 1pm), i usually sleep wayyy less on week days when im not on holidays

cat or dog person: CATS

favorite fictional characters: gonna copy/paste my previous answer to this question: ellana (from pierre bottero’s books) - salim (same books) - stiles stilinski – spencer reid - wolverine

favorite bands/singers: papa roach

dream trip: road trip somewhere i can encounter different kinds of landscapes, especially forests

dream job: storyteller

when was this blog created: may 2013

current number of followers: 719

when did your blog reach its peak: do u mean papa roach peak or mika peak? o/ but yeah my blog is kinda lame but idc

time right now: 6:10pm

song stuck in my head: -

last movie i watched: War Dogs (my dad chose it lol) and before that Gallows, which made me extremely paranoid last night lmao bad decision

last tv show i watched: orphan black (watched it a month ago and now i kinda wanna catch up on spn but idrk...)

what i am wearing right now: red shorts with moose on it (i bought them in Canada and i love them lol / edit: hahaha i googled it and that’s the ones), and a “parental advisory consent” shirt lmao remind me why i bought this?? (in my defence i was 15 or 16)

what kind of stuff do i post: (i know this should be a short answer but i feel like going into details oops) - what i reblog: cats, movies, harry potter, dylan o’brien, comics (Marvel, Wolverine...), quotes, words/vocabulary/languages, books, art, TV shows (spn, got, orphan black, teen wolf, carmilla, quotidien -french tv program), cute and motivational stuff, pictures i find aesthetically pleasing, nature/landscapes/forests, posts about historical facts/history/interesting things in general/culture, feminism, queer stuff, nonsense/funny stuff, aaron taylor-johnson, depression and anxiety etc (nothing too triggering -i think?)... i used to post a lot about mika but atm it’s on hold lmao. - what i post myself (not regularly): posts about tv shows/movies, pieces of writing/stuff from my notebook, sometimes art/drawings, personal posts, links to my concert reviews, sometimes pictures ive taken, travel/concert pics... - people/movies/shows I have posted about: Papa Roach, Mika, Fantastic Beasts, Dylan O'Brien, Teen Wolf, The Maze Runner, Matthew Gray Gubler, Criminal Minds, Aaron Taylor-Johnson, Marvel, Skins, Game of Thrones.

do i have any other blogs: 2 active side blogs (one is gubleroach, the other i keep for myself), and 4 inactive ones (i use 2 of them as “redirection” pages)

do i get asks regularly: no :(

why did i choose my url: “wildfire” bc of someone whose (old, they no longer use it) username inspired me in a way (this is only one of the 5 explanations I could give for my username), “ornot” for obscure reasons

lucky number: 3

following: 1299 (wow wtf that much??)

tagging: @wosslbird @chillyls @ookaminoki @dolphindewott @this-is-not-an-inspirational-url @sleepylunas @o-misfits @catbvtt and anyone wanting to do this, really :)